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Speaker 1: For a man, getting your first colonoscopy is either the

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Speaker 1: most terrifying or thrilling experience of your life, especially when

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Speaker 1: it's performed by a non medical professional. Oh my, but

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Speaker 1: that's my personal experience, and I digress, because today we

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Speaker 1: call one dude who's scheduled to have his area inspected

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Speaker 1: for the first time Lucky, and his wife told us

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Speaker 1: he's very nervous about it, but he's about to get

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Speaker 1: a whole lot more nervous when he hears what the

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Speaker 1: doctor has planned. It's in your phone tap right now. Hello, Hi,

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Speaker 1: this is Adrian calling from doctor's office. Is this Matthew?

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Speaker 1: It is him, Matthew. So I'm just confirming your appointment.

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Speaker 1: You're having a colon oscoy be done with us tomorrow

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Speaker 1: at three pm. That's correct, Yes, great, okay. Oh and

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Speaker 1: I see on your profile here that you're an organ donor.

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Speaker 1: Uh yeah, okay, Actually my wife encouraged me to change that. Excellent.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I just want to tell you a few

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Speaker 1: things about the procedure. You know, the anesthesiologist will be

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Speaker 1: putting you under beforehand, right yep. And in the event

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Speaker 1: of any unforeseen complications, we'll make sure that your organs

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Speaker 1: go to someone who really needs them. Wait, do things

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Speaker 1: really go bad? Wait? No, I mean not usually. It's

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Speaker 1: just that with any procedure, we always tell the patients,

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Speaker 1: you know, just in case the worst happens, this is

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Speaker 1: what we're gonna do. So anyway, while you're under, are

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Speaker 1: there any non essential organs that you don't want to

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Speaker 1: part with? What? No? Any like any organs that you

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Speaker 1: wouldn't miss right now that we could just have? No,

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Speaker 1: I think i'd miss all of them. Are you sure? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'm just coming in for a routine colonoscopy. Well yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I'm just saying a lot of people think that

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Speaker 1: you need to wait until you're dead to donate your organs.

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Speaker 1: But that's not the case anymore. Wait. Through the advancements

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Speaker 1: that they've made in science, it's crazy. I could take

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Speaker 1: out two or three things right now and you wouldn't

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Speaker 1: miss them. Are you joking right now? No? It's incredible.

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Speaker 1: I mean technology has come so far. Well, I mean,

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Speaker 1: hooray for medical science. That's great. I no, I don't

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Speaker 1: take anything out of my body, all right. So if

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Speaker 1: this is about the money, don't worry. Okay, you'll be compensated.

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Speaker 1: This is not about the money, because I'm looking at

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Speaker 1: the priceless right here, and we could probably give you

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Speaker 1: thirty seven hundred for a spleen. I don't care. You

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Speaker 1: know what, Those are really hot right now? Everybody's buying

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Speaker 1: spleens up. I like my sleeen. Where it is that's

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Speaker 1: trying to harvest me? Oh okay, now I think I

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Speaker 1: see what it is in your head. You're thinking, Oh, like,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to be in a New Orleans bathtub unconscious,

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Speaker 1: then some weirdo is going to come and take out

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Speaker 1: my kidneys. Uh. Yeah, that's not how we do it.

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Speaker 1: We're very professional about it. Don't our bathtubs are bigger?

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Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? Don't you know what? I'm very

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Speaker 1: uncomfortable with this. You're basically trying to get me to

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Speaker 1: donate an organ to you, and you're not taking no

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Speaker 1: for an answer. No, I'm asking a registered organ donor

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Speaker 1: to do what he promised and donate one of his organs.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was being nice and trying to help society,

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Speaker 1: but now you're just being like, no, I have to

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Speaker 1: do this right now. I don't even mention the six

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Speaker 1: year old girl that could really use an appendix, right

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Speaker 1: now to save her life. That would be guilt tripping.

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Speaker 1: You actually don't have one, and I'm not doing it.

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Speaker 1: Actually don't have an appendix. I almost take it out

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Speaker 1: when I was a kid, so haha, too bad. See.

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Speaker 1: And if you were a registered organ donor, you would

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Speaker 1: have been paid for that. Whatever. You know what, none

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Speaker 1: of this is making any sense, and I'd like to

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Speaker 1: cancel my appointment please. I'm just saying, maybe we take

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Speaker 1: a small piece of your kidney and then we can

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Speaker 1: donate it to a local university. They could do some research.

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Speaker 1: You won't even notice. At least you're fifty to sixty

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Speaker 1: years old. See you're saying it would effect me later on.

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Speaker 1: I don't I don't like that. No, dude, A lot

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Speaker 1: of people don't even make it to sixty, so it

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Speaker 1: might not even be an issue. I plan on being

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Speaker 1: a lot older than sixty. I don't like this. I

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Speaker 1: am hanging up. Take my name off. Okay, well borrow,

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Speaker 1: I'm not coming in. Your wife. Vanessa said there's one

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Speaker 1: organ in particular that you never use, so can we

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Speaker 1: at least take that one? Wait? Wait, why do you

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Speaker 1: speak about wife? I spoke to her after she emailed

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Speaker 1: me to do this prank call on you. Cause see,

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Speaker 1: I'm not actually with the doctor's office. I actually work

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Speaker 1: on a radio show called Brook and Jeffrey in the Morning.

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Speaker 1: Are you kidding me? You can relax. I talked to

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Speaker 1: her and she said she convinced you to become an

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Speaker 1: organ donor, and said you're feeling a little bit hesitant

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Speaker 1: about it. I just that was my greatest fear. Me. Dude,

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Speaker 1: you seem pretty bent out of shape about the donating

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Speaker 1: the organ stuff. You didn't really blink when I mentioned

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Speaker 1: your wife Vanessa in that particular organ Wait what wait?

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Speaker 1: Wait what did she say? She said, there's one Morgan

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Speaker 1: in particular that you never use. Uh no comment. Okay,

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Speaker 1: wake up every morning dad, weekday mornings on the twenties

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Speaker 1: Brooking Jeffrey in the Morning. Go