Speaker 1: Your mom was really good friends with my mom. Oh
Speaker 1: my god, that's awesome. Yeah, she loo turns with your dad,
Speaker 1: but my mom and her got pretty close actually, so
Speaker 1: we have to be friends, damn it. Frans. Yeah, Like,
Speaker 1: I feel like i'd vibe with you. I remember there
Speaker 1: was a red carpet. I was nominated for an Alma Award,
Speaker 1: and your mom came up to be so sweet. Because
Speaker 1: I think your mom even came to my King Sea
Speaker 1: or something, but she came up to be so sweet.
Speaker 1: It was like, I'm so proud of you. I knew
Speaker 1: you were going to do it on first generation. So
Speaker 1: I'm literally like, okay, navigating two worlds. And my parents
Speaker 1: think that if I go to therapy, I'm going to
Speaker 1: end up in a psyche cord, like there's such a
Speaker 1: stigma behind it. Hello and Happy Monday to all of
Speaker 1: my beautiful listeners. Thanks to everyone for tuning into this
Speaker 1: week's episode of Cheeks and Chill. I don't know about you,
Speaker 1: but I'm a little over the rain, you guys. I mean,
Speaker 1: I love the rain. I think it's good, it's cleansing,
Speaker 1: the earth needs it. But I think it's time for
Speaker 1: some sunny days. But AnyWho, On today's show, we're going
Speaker 1: to be joined by an actress you might know from
Speaker 1: the Show's Grown Ish or How I Met Your Father.
Speaker 1: I'll give you a hint. She's Mexican, and we're going
Speaker 1: to talk about everything from being a first generation Latina
Speaker 1: to mental health to being a strong and confident woman.
Speaker 1: So let's get started. This is chickies and chill as promised.
Speaker 1: Sitting here with me today is a very talented actress,
Speaker 1: Francia Raisa. Oh my god, Francia, how are you? Thank
Speaker 1: you for being here, Thanks for having me. I'm really good.
Speaker 1: You have beautiful skin. Thank you so much that I
Speaker 1: just got a fictional yesterday. So oh nicee, no way. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So what do your friends call you? Do they call
Speaker 1: you Francia or do they like shorten it? On How
Speaker 1: Met Your Father? Actually, the cast calls me Frank Frank Okay,
Speaker 1: Hillary started that nickname. There's also another nickname. It's Frasia
Speaker 1: because on the first season of How Your Father I
Speaker 1: joined Rya and then didn't make it into the spelling
Speaker 1: and my cap father was so funny. So they call
Speaker 1: me frame for Frasia uma organ. Oh nice that's that's
Speaker 1: like what I do, Amiga Yeah, that's so cute. Oh
Speaker 1: so Riya, Oh my gosh, are you still in Riya?
Speaker 1: I'll just took a break from it. I mean technically
Speaker 1: I am, but I it's just like when you connect
Speaker 1: with somewhere, you actually have to go on the date
Speaker 1: part or like do the effort. Yeah, so you're kind
Speaker 1: of like nah. Yeah. So for those of you who
Speaker 1: don't know what Riya is, I think we've talked about
Speaker 1: it here on the pod. It's a dating app. I
Speaker 1: was on right before I met my boyfriend and then
Speaker 1: he was on there. I didn't know he was on
Speaker 1: there until we started dating, like I don't know, like
Speaker 1: three weeks in and I was like, oh, you're still Riya.
Speaker 1: Hold on, you better erase that. But that's that's cool.
Speaker 1: I think Rya is one of the cooler, like upskill
Speaker 1: dating apps. I personally think it's it's cool. But I'm
Speaker 1: glad you're taking a little break. I think sometimes it
Speaker 1: is necessary. But AnyWho, getting back to you, Okay, so
Speaker 1: you're an actress. But you started off as a dancer, right, Yes,
Speaker 1: I did. I started dancing when I was about five
Speaker 1: day doing everything you know latin Na Daniel Dad being
Speaker 1: like and tap and bile and karate and hip hop,
Speaker 1: and then I was going to pursue a dance career
Speaker 1: when I was fifteen sixteen years old, but at the
Speaker 1: time I also had the dream of acting. And this
Speaker 1: girl that I was backup dancing with id just booked
Speaker 1: a part on Unfabulous on Nickelodeon when Emma Roberts was
Speaker 1: on Nickelodeon. That's how long the boat it was. And
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, how did you do that?
Speaker 1: And she was like, oh, I went to an audition. Girl.
Speaker 1: I didn't even know what an audition was. I was like, cool,
Speaker 1: how did you get that? She said a manager. I
Speaker 1: said cool, Can I meet her? And she and I
Speaker 1: didn't really understand how bold that was at the time.
Speaker 1: I was about fifteen, and she was like, well, she's
Speaker 1: actually looking for a bilingual actress. And I was like, great,
Speaker 1: I'm bilingual. Let's do it. And she signed me and
Speaker 1: there went my dance career. I started auditioning for acting
Speaker 1: roles in about six months later. I booked bring it on, dude,
Speaker 1: that's freaking awesome. And see, it's because how bold you
Speaker 1: were that you were just like, I don't know, I
Speaker 1: just I mean, being outspoken and not being afraid to
Speaker 1: ask questions is so powerful, especially at that age. So
Speaker 1: I freaking applaud you for that. Thank you. I lost that,
Speaker 1: but thank you at the time. Yeah, you know what
Speaker 1: happens is that the world happens, and then you know,
Speaker 1: we life and we become a little bit more. I
Speaker 1: don't know if the word is afraid because of what
Speaker 1: people may think or what they say, but like like
Speaker 1: they always say, when you're young, you don't think about, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on that roller coaster, like you just
Speaker 1: want to get on it, and you don't think of
Speaker 1: like the consequences. I think that's what happens. We start
Speaker 1: thinking of consequences and shit, and then we lose that
Speaker 1: like free spirit. Maybe I don't know, but you seem
Speaker 1: like a very confident, like outspoken woman though now I am. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I lost a lot of that confidence for a while.
Speaker 1: I think it's because we start getting introduced to rejection.
Speaker 1: You know, as young kids. I think our parents are
Speaker 1: constantly trying to cheer a song, which is amazing, but
Speaker 1: in cheering a song and telling us we could do it,
Speaker 1: they should probably also tell us that, like sometimes it
Speaker 1: might not happen and it's okay. Other people deserve to
Speaker 1: win as well, right, And so when you don't win
Speaker 1: and you gain that competitive nature, and then you go
Speaker 1: out in the real world and you realize everything your
Speaker 1: parents told you is true, but that doesn't mean that
Speaker 1: everything is meant for you, or that doesn't mean everything
Speaker 1: goes your way. So we start losing that and it's
Speaker 1: like this whole identity crisis that we go through and
Speaker 1: then you know, whether we want to accept it or not.
Speaker 1: You know, a lot of us need to therapy. And
Speaker 1: in twenty fourteen, that's when I first started seeking it,
Speaker 1: people were concerned, and I think in twenty twenty, the
Speaker 1: forced rest that we all had to endures. Probably I
Speaker 1: hate that so many people lost their lives. There's probably
Speaker 1: the best thing that ever happened to me, And I
Speaker 1: think that break helped me to figure myself out and
Speaker 1: understand everything that I'm talking about right now and be
Speaker 1: the and bring back my confidence. I also durned my
Speaker 1: hair a month ago, so that also made me feel
Speaker 1: like just the rabbit and I feel like a whole
Speaker 1: new persons that poisoned yesterday. And I was like, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: her too, her k yeah, her too, her too. I
Speaker 1: love it. I've been wanting to do my hair like
Speaker 1: dye my hair red for so long my hairstyle is
Speaker 1: just won't do it because my hair, I have a
Speaker 1: lot of hair, it's just very thin, so I just
Speaker 1: I gotta like let it rest a little bit. But
Speaker 1: it looks beautiful on you. And I think, like, you
Speaker 1: know what you said right now, Sometimes when we're going
Speaker 1: through a breakup or something like horrible, like we want
Speaker 1: to make some type of external change and it just
Speaker 1: helps us internally. So I totally get that, and I'm glad.
Speaker 1: I'm huge. I'm a huge advocate for you know, seeking
Speaker 1: therapy and doing therapy and life coaching. I've been doing
Speaker 1: it since I was twelve, and it's helped me so
Speaker 1: much because sometimes I think, like shit, like I've been
Speaker 1: through so many things, how the heck did I get here?
Speaker 1: And it's because of therapy. So I totally feel you
Speaker 1: on that. I feel you. On twenty twenty, it was
Speaker 1: a year of like so much change for all of us,
Speaker 1: of course, but for me it was like whoa. It
Speaker 1: put a lot of things into perspective. So I totally
Speaker 1: get you. And then just backpedaling a little bit because
Speaker 1: you did mention your dad and I know him pretty well. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so he's your Mexican correct, Yeah, my dad? So your
Speaker 1: dad is from I thought your dad was Mexican for
Speaker 1: some reason. I don't know, but his name is What
Speaker 1: was that like growing up with him? Is this famous
Speaker 1: like radio jockey? Oh my god? You know what? Because
Speaker 1: you were in the same boat as me, I can
Speaker 1: talk to you about this. It wasn't easy. Amazing girl,
Speaker 1: like so much expectation, you know how it is lasa
Speaker 1: and you have to like sweep it on the rug
Speaker 1: and pretend like nothing's happening, and you're like, yeah, some
Speaker 1: shit is going down. I don't know why. I starts
Speaker 1: seeing finished. And they didn't explain to Caves very well
Speaker 1: that my dad was famous. You know, I didn't. I
Speaker 1: didn't get it. They would they were. They didn't really
Speaker 1: explain the celebritiness. It just was what it was. And
Speaker 1: so I remember going out to the movies or anything
Speaker 1: and people stopping him for pictures and autographs and I
Speaker 1: got so mad. I'm like, it's a family time. Why
Speaker 1: And so that's tough it is. And then, you know,
Speaker 1: I don't know about you, but even you know, sometimes
Speaker 1: growing up, I didn't know if some friends were my
Speaker 1: friends because of me or because of my dad. And
Speaker 1: you know, all some people didn't like me because I
Speaker 1: was a rich bitch. Oh I hear you. I feel
Speaker 1: you same. Same like I grew to say okay because
Speaker 1: my mom would be like, well, these people feed us.
Speaker 1: But sometimes they'd be like we're at Disneyland or we're
Speaker 1: somewhere at the movies, and it's like I just want
Speaker 1: my mom right now, like yeah, you yeah, I'm like
Speaker 1: I just want my mom, like I don't want the artists,
Speaker 1: like you know, And it was so hard. Now I
Speaker 1: understand because I'm like, oh shit, Like now I feel
Speaker 1: bad for the people around me, and I feel like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, hopefully they don't get annoyed. But like,
Speaker 1: as a child, it's tough. You don't know, and I
Speaker 1: don't think they explained it to us. But also I
Speaker 1: have to understand that they didn't really know how to
Speaker 1: explain it to us. Like, if you think about it,
Speaker 1: my dad was first generation money, so was my mom.
Speaker 1: Like they didn't know what to do with that, or
Speaker 1: and the fame. You know, you talk about it, but
Speaker 1: no one prepares you for it you and I have
Speaker 1: the advantage that we can learn from their mistakes. And
Speaker 1: also I don't know your first generation, right, I'm third,
Speaker 1: your third Yeah, oh wow, that's crazy. See, I'm first generations.
Speaker 1: My parents really just didn't know any better. Being first generation.
Speaker 1: Growing about here, it's like acclimating to American life and
Speaker 1: keeping to my culture. It's like a whole thing. But
Speaker 1: it was it was tough. Yeah, of course, as you
Speaker 1: feel like, okay, if I become too quote unquote American
Speaker 1: and I'm not going to be accepted by my people,
Speaker 1: and it's kind of like, I think, now, what has
Speaker 1: helped me is kind of like I'm part of the
Speaker 1: two hundred percent club. You know, I'm one hundred percent
Speaker 1: Mexican and I'm one hundred percent American, and I just
Speaker 1: I'm lucky and we're blessed enough to have that, you know,
Speaker 1: just embrace it. But growing up, it was like, oh,
Speaker 1: you're too light skin like, uh, you don't fit in.
Speaker 1: And then on the other side it was like, oh, no,
Speaker 1: you're too Mexican. It was just like always trying to
Speaker 1: find well, who the hell where do I fit in?
Speaker 1: And then your parent is famous. Yes, on top of that,
Speaker 1: and scratching my car. Girl shut up at school. Yes,
Speaker 1: my first call was Alexius see four thirty. It was
Speaker 1: two thousand, I don't remember. But anyways, I'll have to
Speaker 1: start parking in the teacher's parking lot because I got
Speaker 1: my car scratched. They scrolled car. My god, same same.
Speaker 1: I had a BMW my uncle. My uncle lupa about
Speaker 1: it for me. And I changed so many different schools
Speaker 1: because it's like I couldn't fit in anywhere, you know.
Speaker 1: So They're like, oh, they found out who my mom was,
Speaker 1: Oh the little rich bitch and this and that, and
Speaker 1: they would scratch my car and I was like, oh yes,
Speaker 1: I'm like, what the Hell's not my fault? You sho
Speaker 1: stuck up just because her dad or her mom. I'm like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god, I feel you. Is
Speaker 1: that why they called you like a diva and stuff?
Speaker 1: Is that one of the res because I heard that somewhere. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean a diva is a word that I hear
Speaker 1: a lot. I mean, so I'm assuming yes, but I'll
Speaker 1: admit at the same time, my dad did raise me
Speaker 1: to be a brat, like he really did. I mean, okay,
Speaker 1: they didn't make me do any chores at home. I
Speaker 1: don't know about you, but we did no chores. The
Speaker 1: only chore I had was going to dance class as
Speaker 1: being the best of karate, so that those were my chores.
Speaker 1: But like he was like, you're the best of everything,
Speaker 1: and you're gonna be a star one day, blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: That's why I was so confident. But he didn't teach
Speaker 1: me about rejection. He didn't teach me about work, he
Speaker 1: didn't teach me about how hard it wasna be. And
Speaker 1: he was already famous. So I was like, oh, this
Speaker 1: seems easy. This seems easy. Do you have siblings, Yeah,
Speaker 1: after younger sisters, your mom met all of us. Yeah,
Speaker 1: your mom was really good friends with my mom. Oh okay,
Speaker 1: I thought with your dad, but oh, oh my god,
Speaker 1: that's awesome. Yeah she returns with your dad, but my
Speaker 1: mom and her got pretty close. Actually, oh wow, I
Speaker 1: didn't know that. Yeah. What what's your mom's name, Beatina?
Speaker 1: I think I have pictures. Oh my god, that's crazy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because I remember there was a red carpet. I was
Speaker 1: nominated for an Alma Award, and your mom came up
Speaker 1: to be so sweet. Because I think your mom even
Speaker 1: came to my king Signeta or something, but she came
Speaker 1: up to be so soon. It was like, I'm so
Speaker 1: proud of you. I knew you were gonna would tell me. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: she would tell me. She's like, that's a who's daughter, baby,
Speaker 1: and look what she's doing. She always wanted for me
Speaker 1: to be an actress. She didn't want me to sing.
Speaker 1: She says, also or it, but I want you to
Speaker 1: be an actress. I feel like that's better. It's easier,
Speaker 1: like in the music, it's so hard now. I'm like, damn,
Speaker 1: mom She was right, but like so when she saw
Speaker 1: you and she's like Meeta, mommy, like she look at
Speaker 1: her like she's doing her thing, and she was very
Speaker 1: proud of you, very very proud of you. So I
Speaker 1: wanted to just tell you because I remember clearly. I
Speaker 1: was like, I saw you at a red carpet. You
Speaker 1: were taking pictures and we weren't able to say high
Speaker 1: because everything was that crazy. Yeah, but I know of you,
Speaker 1: of course, I know who you are and everything and
Speaker 1: what you're what you're doing, what you have done, which
Speaker 1: I honestly like the fact you're representing us so well.
Speaker 1: So thank you for that. So we have to be friends,
Speaker 1: damn it, Francia, Like, I feel like i'd vibe with you. Okay,
Speaker 1: So let's talk a little bit about mental health because
Speaker 1: it is something that I've gone through, and I want
Speaker 1: to know what your take is on it, especially ever
Speaker 1: since you know the pandemic, and I think that's when
Speaker 1: most of us, like felt the anxiety and depression. I
Speaker 1: know I did hardcore, but it helped me. What is
Speaker 1: your take on on what's going on and if we
Speaker 1: should speak about it a little bit more, especially in
Speaker 1: our culture, well in our culture especially, I think it's
Speaker 1: super important to talk about And the reason I constantly
Speaker 1: ask people what generation they are because I'm understanding that
Speaker 1: each generation goes through something different. On first generation, so
Speaker 1: I'm literally like, okay, navigating too worlds, and my parents
Speaker 1: think that if I go to therapy, I'm going to
Speaker 1: end up in a psychord like there's such a stigma
Speaker 1: behind it. I would encourage I'm first energy, so my
Speaker 1: kids would be second generation, so I would actually encourage that.
Speaker 1: Now that those kinds have just changed, like it's actually
Speaker 1: just recently, I think the pandemic opened the doors law
Speaker 1: and I appreciate that the world is now more understanding
Speaker 1: of mental health issues and what it can cause us
Speaker 1: because now we have a lot more resources. But in
Speaker 1: our culture, man, it's just so important for us to
Speaker 1: talk about us navigating too worlds, especially because we look
Speaker 1: different and we're in a season of unlearning a lot
Speaker 1: of things culturally, politically, human wise. So I think it's
Speaker 1: just a lot of change, and especially our generation, like
Speaker 1: we were born at a time when the internet wasn't
Speaker 1: even what it is today. We grew I mean, I
Speaker 1: remember dial up. So I think especially for us growing
Speaker 1: up where we're constantly going through a lot of changes,
Speaker 1: is really necessary, especially with our parents, who I mean
Speaker 1: never even had cell phones, I imagine the changes are
Speaker 1: going through. So I think, yea more so than anything
Speaker 1: with mental health, I think the first thing to for
Speaker 1: us to do is to understand and forgive and have grace.
Speaker 1: Like I was we were talking about our parents earlier,
Speaker 1: I have to tell myself and repeat, they didn't know
Speaker 1: any better, they didn't understand. I grew up differently, they're
Speaker 1: from a different generation. I have to have grace for
Speaker 1: the way that they're talking to me, or the way
Speaker 1: they're viewing me, or for the way that they raised me,
Speaker 1: and it's my job now at thirty four almost thirty
Speaker 1: five years old, to change the way that or change
Speaker 1: the plugs that they put into my brain and like
Speaker 1: just reorder them as far as how I view the world,
Speaker 1: how I view myself, how I view relationships. I'm still
Speaker 1: single at you know, at this age, and I never
Speaker 1: thought that would be because you know, culturally it's unheard of, right,
Speaker 1: but it's it's also not a bad thing. And I'm
Speaker 1: glad and thank you for saying that I represent Latina
Speaker 1: as well, because I'm really trying. I'm also trying to
Speaker 1: now is a thirty four year old single woman, like
Speaker 1: you know, kind of bleed out that stigma that we
Speaker 1: have to be young when we get married, young, when
Speaker 1: we have kids, or you know, we're no good. Absolutely,
Speaker 1: that's something that I had to kind of a hump
Speaker 1: in the road that I had to just overcome. Was oh,
Speaker 1: like you yeah, I was married and I got divorced
Speaker 1: and I have no kids yet, and oh are my
Speaker 1: like the fact that I have to do perhaps IVF
Speaker 1: to get pregnant if I want kids. It's kind of
Speaker 1: like for a long time in our culture, it was
Speaker 1: my eggs you did, good job. I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 1: I haven't done it yet, and I think it takes
Speaker 1: so much pressure off because it's kind of like, oh,
Speaker 1: you got to go that route. You're broken. It's that's
Speaker 1: you know, no cedras and its way no no, no no.
Speaker 1: Things have changed, and like what you said is having
Speaker 1: grace and just understanding people that came before us and
Speaker 1: our grandparents and even my mom. She was very like
Speaker 1: open minded and very hip, a very hip mom, but
Speaker 1: she was also very traditional, you know what I mean
Speaker 1: in certain things that I'm like, Okay, now I have
Speaker 1: more compassion for her now that I've gotten older or whatever.
Speaker 1: But absolutely I think that everything you're saying about mental
Speaker 1: health and making it okay like along for a long time.
Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's getting a little better, but
Speaker 1: it's like boys don't cry, you know, and it's like, okay, guys,
Speaker 1: should you know it's okay to be vulnerable, it's okay
Speaker 1: to do therapy. That doesn't mean that there's something wrong
Speaker 1: with you. It's no worse. See, I think we all
Speaker 1: need it, right But okay, So that's a great example.
Speaker 1: I totally agree. But because I was raised for so
Speaker 1: many years believing that a man is in a man
Speaker 1: if he cries. I still get uncomfortable when a man cries. Really,
Speaker 1: it makes me so uncomfortable. So I have to sit
Speaker 1: back and be like, Okay, I'm uncomfortable because this is
Speaker 1: what I was taught. This is okay, I he's allowed
Speaker 1: to cry. He's a human being. So it's like retraining,
Speaker 1: and I think that's where a lot of our mental
Speaker 1: health issues also stem from the retraining, the relearning. It's insane,
Speaker 1: and it could be something as simple as that that's
Speaker 1: going it triggered anyone that's listening right now, or something
Speaker 1: else that was triggling, Like you know, there's a lot
Speaker 1: of tweets about what parents say to us when we're little.
Speaker 1: Like let's say, if you rip the banana, you're gonna faint,
Speaker 1: and then it happens one time, you're like oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: So like how long does it take you to understand
Speaker 1: that just because you rip the banana, you don't faint,
Speaker 1: you know, or something like that. So it's hard. It's
Speaker 1: it's a trigger. So even that I'm like, okay, I
Speaker 1: have to understand if it was a different time, it
Speaker 1: was a different time. This is morally correct, this is
Speaker 1: not this is old, it's not traditional. We're in a
Speaker 1: new world. It's it's hard. Yeah, it's giving yourself that therapy,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, it's just speaking to yourself.
Speaker 1: And one thing from the short time that like we've
Speaker 1: been speaking and talking, it's like you're very very enlightened.
Speaker 1: Like I don't think you're a smart woman, Like I
Speaker 1: can tell you've done your internal work. And and I
Speaker 1: did hear on Jay Shetty, you your interview a few
Speaker 1: years back where your journal. Do you still do that
Speaker 1: journal and write letters to God or no? Yeah, I
Speaker 1: still have. I've been pretty bad about it lately because
Speaker 1: I've been more focused on meditating differently. It's so funny
Speaker 1: that Jay Shetty podcast that you brought up, because I
Speaker 1: just talked to him the other day and I said, Jay,
Speaker 1: I really want to do that interview again, and he was, yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: and I was like no, seriously, I was so depressed
Speaker 1: during that time that like every not everything I said,
Speaker 1: I was I can't even listen to it. But also
Speaker 1: I was like I wore a baseball cap and a sweater.
Speaker 1: I was very tired. I wouldn't wear any makeup, but
Speaker 1: I was like, I also just didn't feel good about myself.
Speaker 1: I was so depressed and that relationship I was in
Speaker 1: that I was talking about wasn't great and I was
Speaker 1: blaming myself in the podcast about it, and I was like, wow,
Speaker 1: I'm still doing this to myself. So we broke up
Speaker 1: right before the pandemic, which is probably the least thing
Speaker 1: that could have happened to me, because I did not
Speaker 1: love myself. And I'm not saying it's his fault. Is like,
Speaker 1: I've been in relationships just like that since I was seventeen,
Speaker 1: and every person after that it was the same as
Speaker 1: the first time I was verbally abused. So yeah, I
Speaker 1: was really really depressed. Oh my god, dude, the fact
Speaker 1: that you were with J Shatty, Like that's one of
Speaker 1: my dreams. I love him so much, Like and you
Speaker 1: should you should do it again. I mean, and there's
Speaker 1: nothing wrong with looking back and saying, you know what,
Speaker 1: I was in a different place at that time, and
Speaker 1: now I'm ready. Now I feel different. Now I want
Speaker 1: to share because still you touched me, You touch my heart,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Yeah, so that's you know,
Speaker 1: but now I can definitely tell like you're in a
Speaker 1: different place, and I think that's what evolving is all about.
Speaker 1: And right now you are single. Is it the longest
Speaker 1: time you've been single? You know, that's hard to say because,
Speaker 1: oh god, this is going to sound terrible. So I've
Speaker 1: been single for coming on four years. Prior to him,
Speaker 1: I was single. I dated a lot of men, but
Speaker 1: I wasn't in a relationship longer than maybe months. Okay,
Speaker 1: So I'm like, Okay, So prior to him, I had
Speaker 1: broken up with someone in two thousand and ten, you know,
Speaker 1: so I get I would say that was a long period.
Speaker 1: I was just staying alone. This is the first time
Speaker 1: that I've been single, and I haven't dated as much
Speaker 1: as I did prior. Okay, So I've spent more time
Speaker 1: alone this time around than the last. The pandemic health
Speaker 1: I was caught up on one dude, you know how
Speaker 1: that is? Yeah, I feel you. I feel caught up,
Speaker 1: caught up and you're like, I know this is not
Speaker 1: supposed to happen. Yeah, but there's something that draws you
Speaker 1: to those things. It's like those little like little boxica us.
Speaker 1: It's like, hold on, Yeah, that looked I was just lonely.
Speaker 1: I was lonely. So let me go back to what
Speaker 1: I know. Yeah, we've we've all had those moments. I
Speaker 1: totally feel you ain't no shame in that is. As
Speaker 1: long as you learn, you know, there's always something to learn.
Speaker 1: So we were talking about self confidence because for me,
Speaker 1: I feel like you're very like a very confident, outspoken
Speaker 1: type of of girl woman. Whatever did it come like
Speaker 1: out of nowhere, Like you've always been that way since
Speaker 1: you were Obviously there's a lot of confidence if you're
Speaker 1: going to like dance and stuff like that at five
Speaker 1: years old. And no, I think I was very confident
Speaker 1: because I said, like, my parents were pretty good about
Speaker 1: implanting that in me up until I was I wanted
Speaker 1: to say till after my first show was canceled, because
Speaker 1: then I was back in real life and I was like,
Speaker 1: I should be easy after this, and it wasn't. So
Speaker 1: after that I lost a lot of it, and also relationships.
Speaker 1: Like I said, I lost a lot of my confidence.
Speaker 1: When I was seventeen, I was staying an older man
Speaker 1: for three years, so that started joindling it. And then
Speaker 1: when my show Dog canceled, I guess it got worse.
Speaker 1: And I think recently what happened is during the pandemic,
Speaker 1: I was by myself, just lent me and my job
Speaker 1: that I had to deal with myself. I had to
Speaker 1: deal with my own demons, and I'll be honest, I
Speaker 1: did trooms by myself, and it was the best thing
Speaker 1: that could have happened to me. Same here, love shrubs,
Speaker 1: I'm micro dos. Oh good, you should I do every
Speaker 1: now and then too. Girl. I was looking in the
Speaker 1: mirror and I was like, you are a bad bitch.
Speaker 1: What are you talking about? Look at you? And for
Speaker 1: some reason I had a Shania Twain I feel like
Speaker 1: a woman on repeat. I was just dancing You're up.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love that song. Oh it just
Speaker 1: makes you feel so badass. I got it. And ever
Speaker 1: since then, like I said, the confidence just started coming out.
Speaker 1: I mean it took some time. It wasn't overnight, you know.
Speaker 1: I was slowly like testing the waters to see little things.
Speaker 1: And then when I dyed my hair red, like I
Speaker 1: told you a month ago, I have been a different person.
Speaker 1: Like thank you for saying that. I feel like the light.
Speaker 1: I've been actually hearing that a lot, and I can
Speaker 1: tell you that for the first time, probably ever in
Speaker 1: my life, I'm starting to really learn myself and like
Speaker 1: myself and this whole Jessica Rabbit Pois and I everything
Speaker 1: like it's really doing. Dude, I love my thirties because
Speaker 1: what you're talking about right now, right like so many women,
Speaker 1: we mean me too. I'm not gonna lie, but like
Speaker 1: I'm afraid sometimes of like even saying my age or
Speaker 1: whatever because in the type of industry that I'm in.
Speaker 1: But then I'm like, wait, like we've done so much.
Speaker 1: I'm fucking proud of myself, and I just I don't know.
Speaker 1: In my twenties, I was just trying to figure it out.
Speaker 1: I feel like, don't get married, don't do it on
Speaker 1: that stuff. In my personal opinion, when you're in your twenties,
Speaker 1: in your thirties, you start like loving yourself more and
Speaker 1: it takes time. Like you said, like affirmations in the mirror.
Speaker 1: You are a badass, you got this. You are healthy,
Speaker 1: you are wealthy, You're a vibrant I tell myself, and
Speaker 1: the more you say it, the better you feel. But
Speaker 1: like loving really yourself laws and all, Like right now,
Speaker 1: I hear you, and you're like you admit to certain things,
Speaker 1: and I totally respect that there's so much power in
Speaker 1: bolder reality, and you're like saying there's certain things, how
Speaker 1: how I was raised, or you're very honest, like that
Speaker 1: says so much about a person. So I completely like
Speaker 1: it's so admirable. So I just wanted to tell you
Speaker 1: that because it takes, especially being in this industry and
Speaker 1: I think like as a Latina being an actress, being
Speaker 1: a singer, the rejection, the comparison, it's just so much.
Speaker 1: Yeah dude, okay, yeah, so that why? Why is that?
Speaker 1: There's two reasons. One, I always I wanted to do
Speaker 1: this by myself. I did not want my dad to
Speaker 1: get credited for anything. Not that I was embarrassed, but
Speaker 1: I just wanted to know that I did it. We're
Speaker 1: so much, I don't I didn't like favors. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: I remember I did franci A Mendees for bringing it on.
Speaker 1: And as soon as I saw that last name, I
Speaker 1: was like, no, it has very says my middle name.
Speaker 1: Also too. My dad did say that one of my
Speaker 1: sisters and I were born. He was like yosa. I
Speaker 1: was like, all right, well this is what you said, dad,
Speaker 1: so here it is, and it does. I love it.
Speaker 1: It just flows really nice, flows really really nice. Um,
Speaker 1: I get you and so many people. Let's just have
Speaker 1: this conversation because I feel you're gonna understand me. I
Speaker 1: don't go by Rivera. I never have. And people think
Speaker 1: that it's something new because there's issues in the family.
Speaker 1: Yes and no, but no, it's I want to be
Speaker 1: seen as cheekies. Okay, my name is Jennie Matine. I
Speaker 1: love my name. Yes, my dad did some pretty messed
Speaker 1: up things, Okay, we forgive him, moving on now, it's cheeky.
Speaker 1: That's my artist name. And I want people to see
Speaker 1: me for me, not always liked. Yes, it's an honor.
Speaker 1: I love what my mom did. I like hands like honestly,
Speaker 1: it's a blessing. It's it's an honor. But see me
Speaker 1: for me, for what I do, for my story, for
Speaker 1: my experience. Don't always just I don't know. Like, I'm
Speaker 1: very proud of what all my family has accomplished. But
Speaker 1: I want to leave my own footprint. And I don't
Speaker 1: need the last name. I can be any last name,
Speaker 1: and I'm still if I'm meant to do what I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do. What I'm doing, it's because that's God's will
Speaker 1: for my life. You know what I mean. So people
Speaker 1: see it in a negative way, but it's like, no,
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't, I don't know. I think it's great,
Speaker 1: thank you. And I feel like for people that haven't
Speaker 1: been in our position, maybe need an explanation of like why.
Speaker 1: And the best thing that I could think of is
Speaker 1: when you're compared airing or you have that last name,
Speaker 1: automatically sink get it. You start judging a book by
Speaker 1: its cover, and then there's an expectation that is said
Speaker 1: on us, and if we don't meet that, it's disappointing
Speaker 1: and you're already expecting me to fail and I haven't
Speaker 1: even started. So let me come as it cleansely as
Speaker 1: my own individual and not someone that you can compare
Speaker 1: me to. Anyone would understand this. You when you get
Speaker 1: in a relationship, you don't want to be compared to
Speaker 1: the X. That's like hell no, so don't compare me
Speaker 1: to an individual that raised me. Yes, but they're different
Speaker 1: than who I am. My dad grew uping on Dudas.
Speaker 1: He's an immigrant here. I was born in La I'm
Speaker 1: a native here. We're different and we're going to choose
Speaker 1: different paths and we're going to be our, our, each
Speaker 1: individual person, because my dad portrayed himself one way. If
Speaker 1: I go the other way, I already know I'm gonna
Speaker 1: be judged. So I don't want to be identified as Lasade.
Speaker 1: I want to be identified as an individual to drop
Speaker 1: the expectations and if I mess up, oh wow, that's
Speaker 1: just Francia or if Chikisa someday, it's like, oh wow,
Speaker 1: that's just Chiki's not I'm life honey, Jenny Amita. Okay,
Speaker 1: so yes, oh my god, you explained it perfectly better
Speaker 1: than I could ever. Now I'm like, okay, yes, this
Speaker 1: is now. I'm going to use that in my in
Speaker 1: my interviews. That's a lot of therapy. Girl, Yeah, girl,
Speaker 1: I know. Oh my gosh, I'm telling you guys, therapy
Speaker 1: is everything. Like it's helped me life coaching. Have you
Speaker 1: done life coaching? No, I have been done life coaching. No.
Speaker 1: I feel like acting and these scripts are enough life
Speaker 1: coaching for me. Plus my therapist. You're absolutely right, you're
Speaker 1: you know what, Yeah, because I went I did some
Speaker 1: acting like classes and it really just helps you. Like
Speaker 1: for me, it helped me. It was more of like
Speaker 1: being able to We did it for like being on
Speaker 1: stage and removing yourself from who you are and stepping
Speaker 1: into someone else's shoes and forgetting all like you know,
Speaker 1: so it really did. It absolutely helped me. I want
Speaker 1: to take more acting classes. Actually, yeah, I think that's
Speaker 1: how that helped me learn grace because stepping into other
Speaker 1: people's shoes and understanding their traumas and it's not too
Speaker 1: far fetched from mine. That makes me feel like, oh,
Speaker 1: everyone is just in pain. That's it. Everyone's just in pain. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 1: And what are you working on right now? I'm on
Speaker 1: hiatus right now. So we just finished filming in February
Speaker 1: and I went to Trinidad for a week for Carnival.
Speaker 1: It was so much fun, and then I to go
Speaker 1: in New York after. So I just got back at
Speaker 1: the beginning of March. I'm working on a salasa line,
Speaker 1: like to eat Salasa um. Yeah, I'm developing that. So
Speaker 1: I'm working on stuff outside of acting, but right now
Speaker 1: I'm taking a break. Oh girl, you gotta send me
Speaker 1: your sala sas out for sure. I'm a huge I
Speaker 1: love salasa and everything, so oh my god. Then yeah,
Speaker 1: so when we hang out, I'll make some for mean,
Speaker 1: you could just come to the house, so I'll have
Speaker 1: a little situation. Oh my god, I love yeah, thank you,
Speaker 1: um but any who, Honestly, I've enjoyed this conversation. I'm
Speaker 1: so glad we were able to talk because I feel
Speaker 1: like we have a lot in common and I feel you,
Speaker 1: I get you, and I think you're doing an amazing job.
Speaker 1: Thank you for being vulnerable, for inspiring us all. And
Speaker 1: we need to go to lunch for sure. And oh,
Speaker 1: do you want to share your social media for us
Speaker 1: all of us like anything website or social media, anything
Speaker 1: that you want to like share. Yes, you can find
Speaker 1: me on Instagram and Facebook. I'm gonna be honest. My
Speaker 1: Facebook is the same as my Instagram, so I would
Speaker 1: just go there and TikTok they're both frances. I do
Speaker 1: not have a Twitter anymore of people. I deactivated it.
Speaker 1: I needed to get out and have a break from
Speaker 1: one social media page, so that was one I chose.
Speaker 1: So TikTok and Instagram. Thanks, thanks, I love it. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: thank you so much. And you guys know that I
Speaker 1: always end every episode with a motivational quote. So the
Speaker 1: quote is very simple. It's very simple, and I think
Speaker 1: it goes with what we've been talking about. But listen, clearly,
Speaker 1: rejection is God's protection. You guys. That is a quote
Speaker 1: that I want to leave you with. Sometimes when one
Speaker 1: door closes in our face, like Francia said, it does
Speaker 1: affect our confidence. And just know that maybe that's happening
Speaker 1: for a reason, because it's a blessing in disguise and
Speaker 1: something better is coming. So AnyWho, that's all I wanted
Speaker 1: to say you guys, thank you so much. Thank you
Speaker 1: for being with me every single Monday. Francia, you are
Speaker 1: the bomb girl Netta, and I'll see you soon. Do
Speaker 1: you need advice on love, relationships, health emas. I'm so
Speaker 1: excited to share with you that my Cheekies and Chill
Speaker 1: podcast will have an extra episode drop each week. I'll
Speaker 1: be answering all your questions. Just leave me a voice message.
Speaker 1: All you have to do is go to speak pype
Speaker 1: dot com slash Cheekies and Chill Podcast and record your questions.
Speaker 1: I can't wait to hear from you. This is a
Speaker 1: production of iHeartRadio and podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram
Speaker 1: at michaela Podcasts and follow me Cheekies That's c hi Quis.
Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast,
Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast, and check
Speaker 1: us out on YouTube.