1 00:00:03,640 --> 00:00:05,440 Speaker 1: Your mom was really good friends with my mom. Oh 2 00:00:05,559 --> 00:00:07,640 Speaker 1: my god, that's awesome. Yeah, she loo turns with your dad, 3 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:09,680 Speaker 1: but my mom and her got pretty close actually, so 4 00:00:09,720 --> 00:00:11,720 Speaker 1: we have to be friends, damn it. Frans. Yeah, Like, 5 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:14,360 Speaker 1: I feel like i'd vibe with you. I remember there 6 00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:16,520 Speaker 1: was a red carpet. I was nominated for an Alma Award, 7 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:18,239 Speaker 1: and your mom came up to be so sweet. Because 8 00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:20,079 Speaker 1: I think your mom even came to my King Sea 9 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:21,640 Speaker 1: or something, but she came up to be so sweet. 10 00:00:21,640 --> 00:00:23,360 Speaker 1: It was like, I'm so proud of you. I knew 11 00:00:23,360 --> 00:00:26,440 Speaker 1: you were going to do it on first generation. So 12 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,600 Speaker 1: I'm literally like, okay, navigating two worlds. And my parents 13 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:31,440 Speaker 1: think that if I go to therapy, I'm going to 14 00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:33,199 Speaker 1: end up in a psyche cord, like there's such a 15 00:00:33,200 --> 00:00:40,959 Speaker 1: stigma behind it. Hello and Happy Monday to all of 16 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:45,319 Speaker 1: my beautiful listeners. Thanks to everyone for tuning into this 17 00:00:45,360 --> 00:00:48,080 Speaker 1: week's episode of Cheeks and Chill. I don't know about you, 18 00:00:48,320 --> 00:00:50,879 Speaker 1: but I'm a little over the rain, you guys. I mean, 19 00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:52,600 Speaker 1: I love the rain. I think it's good, it's cleansing, 20 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,400 Speaker 1: the earth needs it. But I think it's time for 21 00:00:55,400 --> 00:00:58,560 Speaker 1: some sunny days. But AnyWho, On today's show, we're going 22 00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:00,639 Speaker 1: to be joined by an actress you might know from 23 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:04,039 Speaker 1: the Show's Grown Ish or How I Met Your Father. 24 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:08,040 Speaker 1: I'll give you a hint. She's Mexican, and we're going 25 00:01:08,080 --> 00:01:10,920 Speaker 1: to talk about everything from being a first generation Latina 26 00:01:11,080 --> 00:01:14,080 Speaker 1: to mental health to being a strong and confident woman. 27 00:01:14,200 --> 00:01:24,360 Speaker 1: So let's get started. This is chickies and chill as promised. 28 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:27,240 Speaker 1: Sitting here with me today is a very talented actress, 29 00:01:27,640 --> 00:01:31,680 Speaker 1: Francia Raisa. Oh my god, Francia, how are you? Thank 30 00:01:31,680 --> 00:01:35,000 Speaker 1: you for being here, Thanks for having me. I'm really good. 31 00:01:35,480 --> 00:01:39,160 Speaker 1: You have beautiful skin. Thank you so much that I 32 00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:44,280 Speaker 1: just got a fictional yesterday. So oh nicee, no way. Yeah. 33 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:45,920 Speaker 1: So what do your friends call you? Do they call 34 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:48,320 Speaker 1: you Francia or do they like shorten it? On How 35 00:01:48,400 --> 00:01:52,560 Speaker 1: Met Your Father? Actually, the cast calls me Frank Frank Okay, 36 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 1: Hillary started that nickname. There's also another nickname. It's Frasia 37 00:01:57,720 --> 00:02:00,440 Speaker 1: because on the first season of How Your Father I 38 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:05,760 Speaker 1: joined Rya and then didn't make it into the spelling 39 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:08,040 Speaker 1: and my cap father was so funny. So they call 40 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:13,359 Speaker 1: me frame for Frasia uma organ. Oh nice that's that's 41 00:02:13,360 --> 00:02:16,079 Speaker 1: like what I do, Amiga Yeah, that's so cute. Oh 42 00:02:16,120 --> 00:02:18,520 Speaker 1: so Riya, Oh my gosh, are you still in Riya? 43 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:21,320 Speaker 1: I'll just took a break from it. I mean technically 44 00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:24,320 Speaker 1: I am, but I it's just like when you connect 45 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:26,119 Speaker 1: with somewhere, you actually have to go on the date 46 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:30,280 Speaker 1: part or like do the effort. Yeah, so you're kind 47 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:32,520 Speaker 1: of like nah. Yeah. So for those of you who 48 00:02:32,560 --> 00:02:34,080 Speaker 1: don't know what Riya is, I think we've talked about 49 00:02:34,120 --> 00:02:35,920 Speaker 1: it here on the pod. It's a dating app. I 50 00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:38,080 Speaker 1: was on right before I met my boyfriend and then 51 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:39,360 Speaker 1: he was on there. I didn't know he was on 52 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:41,640 Speaker 1: there until we started dating, like I don't know, like 53 00:02:41,680 --> 00:02:43,359 Speaker 1: three weeks in and I was like, oh, you're still Riya. 54 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:46,480 Speaker 1: Hold on, you better erase that. But that's that's cool. 55 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:49,480 Speaker 1: I think Rya is one of the cooler, like upskill 56 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:53,040 Speaker 1: dating apps. I personally think it's it's cool. But I'm 57 00:02:53,080 --> 00:02:55,120 Speaker 1: glad you're taking a little break. I think sometimes it 58 00:02:55,160 --> 00:02:58,360 Speaker 1: is necessary. But AnyWho, getting back to you, Okay, so 59 00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,840 Speaker 1: you're an actress. But you started off as a dancer, right, Yes, 60 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 1: I did. I started dancing when I was about five 61 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:09,200 Speaker 1: day doing everything you know latin Na Daniel Dad being 62 00:03:09,240 --> 00:03:12,079 Speaker 1: like and tap and bile and karate and hip hop, 63 00:03:12,120 --> 00:03:14,480 Speaker 1: and then I was going to pursue a dance career 64 00:03:14,560 --> 00:03:19,440 Speaker 1: when I was fifteen sixteen years old, but at the 65 00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:22,079 Speaker 1: time I also had the dream of acting. And this 66 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,240 Speaker 1: girl that I was backup dancing with id just booked 67 00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 1: a part on Unfabulous on Nickelodeon when Emma Roberts was 68 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:29,959 Speaker 1: on Nickelodeon. That's how long the boat it was. And 69 00:03:30,080 --> 00:03:31,560 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, how did you do that? 70 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:33,760 Speaker 1: And she was like, oh, I went to an audition. Girl. 71 00:03:33,800 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 1: I didn't even know what an audition was. I was like, cool, 72 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:38,960 Speaker 1: how did you get that? She said a manager. I 73 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,800 Speaker 1: said cool, Can I meet her? And she and I 74 00:03:41,840 --> 00:03:44,200 Speaker 1: didn't really understand how bold that was at the time. 75 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:46,320 Speaker 1: I was about fifteen, and she was like, well, she's 76 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:49,080 Speaker 1: actually looking for a bilingual actress. And I was like, great, 77 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:52,760 Speaker 1: I'm bilingual. Let's do it. And she signed me and 78 00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,320 Speaker 1: there went my dance career. I started auditioning for acting 79 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,720 Speaker 1: roles in about six months later. I booked bring it on, dude, 80 00:03:58,760 --> 00:04:01,480 Speaker 1: that's freaking awesome. And see, it's because how bold you 81 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:03,680 Speaker 1: were that you were just like, I don't know, I 82 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,800 Speaker 1: just I mean, being outspoken and not being afraid to 83 00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,240 Speaker 1: ask questions is so powerful, especially at that age. So 84 00:04:09,280 --> 00:04:11,840 Speaker 1: I freaking applaud you for that. Thank you. I lost that, 85 00:04:12,040 --> 00:04:14,520 Speaker 1: but thank you at the time. Yeah, you know what 86 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 1: happens is that the world happens, and then you know, 87 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:21,479 Speaker 1: we life and we become a little bit more. I 88 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,560 Speaker 1: don't know if the word is afraid because of what 89 00:04:23,600 --> 00:04:26,080 Speaker 1: people may think or what they say, but like like 90 00:04:26,120 --> 00:04:28,680 Speaker 1: they always say, when you're young, you don't think about, oh, 91 00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:30,200 Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on that roller coaster, like you just 92 00:04:30,279 --> 00:04:31,600 Speaker 1: want to get on it, and you don't think of 93 00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:33,840 Speaker 1: like the consequences. I think that's what happens. We start 94 00:04:33,920 --> 00:04:37,120 Speaker 1: thinking of consequences and shit, and then we lose that 95 00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:39,880 Speaker 1: like free spirit. Maybe I don't know, but you seem 96 00:04:39,920 --> 00:04:44,080 Speaker 1: like a very confident, like outspoken woman though now I am. Yeah, 97 00:04:44,360 --> 00:04:48,239 Speaker 1: I lost a lot of that confidence for a while. 98 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:51,520 Speaker 1: I think it's because we start getting introduced to rejection. 99 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:55,600 Speaker 1: You know, as young kids. I think our parents are 100 00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:58,440 Speaker 1: constantly trying to cheer a song, which is amazing, but 101 00:04:58,520 --> 00:05:00,720 Speaker 1: in cheering a song and telling us we could do it, 102 00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:02,800 Speaker 1: they should probably also tell us that, like sometimes it 103 00:05:02,880 --> 00:05:05,120 Speaker 1: might not happen and it's okay. Other people deserve to 104 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,800 Speaker 1: win as well, right, And so when you don't win 105 00:05:08,279 --> 00:05:10,640 Speaker 1: and you gain that competitive nature, and then you go 106 00:05:10,640 --> 00:05:12,960 Speaker 1: out in the real world and you realize everything your 107 00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,680 Speaker 1: parents told you is true, but that doesn't mean that 108 00:05:15,760 --> 00:05:18,480 Speaker 1: everything is meant for you, or that doesn't mean everything 109 00:05:18,520 --> 00:05:20,920 Speaker 1: goes your way. So we start losing that and it's 110 00:05:20,960 --> 00:05:24,120 Speaker 1: like this whole identity crisis that we go through and 111 00:05:24,160 --> 00:05:26,840 Speaker 1: then you know, whether we want to accept it or not. 112 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:29,599 Speaker 1: You know, a lot of us need to therapy. And 113 00:05:30,120 --> 00:05:32,640 Speaker 1: in twenty fourteen, that's when I first started seeking it, 114 00:05:34,120 --> 00:05:37,880 Speaker 1: people were concerned, and I think in twenty twenty, the 115 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:42,480 Speaker 1: forced rest that we all had to endures. Probably I 116 00:05:42,520 --> 00:05:44,479 Speaker 1: hate that so many people lost their lives. There's probably 117 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:46,599 Speaker 1: the best thing that ever happened to me, And I 118 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:48,839 Speaker 1: think that break helped me to figure myself out and 119 00:05:48,960 --> 00:05:51,200 Speaker 1: understand everything that I'm talking about right now and be 120 00:05:51,279 --> 00:05:53,599 Speaker 1: the and bring back my confidence. I also durned my 121 00:05:53,640 --> 00:05:55,440 Speaker 1: hair a month ago, so that also made me feel 122 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:57,400 Speaker 1: like just the rabbit and I feel like a whole 123 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:01,440 Speaker 1: new persons that poisoned yesterday. And I was like, yeah, yeah, 124 00:06:01,480 --> 00:06:04,120 Speaker 1: her too, her k yeah, her too, her too. I 125 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:05,839 Speaker 1: love it. I've been wanting to do my hair like 126 00:06:06,000 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 1: dye my hair red for so long my hairstyle is 127 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:08,960 Speaker 1: just won't do it because my hair, I have a 128 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:11,360 Speaker 1: lot of hair, it's just very thin, so I just 129 00:06:11,400 --> 00:06:13,120 Speaker 1: I gotta like let it rest a little bit. But 130 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:16,200 Speaker 1: it looks beautiful on you. And I think, like, you 131 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,320 Speaker 1: know what you said right now, Sometimes when we're going 132 00:06:18,320 --> 00:06:21,440 Speaker 1: through a breakup or something like horrible, like we want 133 00:06:21,480 --> 00:06:24,880 Speaker 1: to make some type of external change and it just 134 00:06:24,960 --> 00:06:28,880 Speaker 1: helps us internally. So I totally get that, and I'm glad. 135 00:06:29,040 --> 00:06:32,400 Speaker 1: I'm huge. I'm a huge advocate for you know, seeking 136 00:06:32,400 --> 00:06:34,960 Speaker 1: therapy and doing therapy and life coaching. I've been doing 137 00:06:34,960 --> 00:06:37,400 Speaker 1: it since I was twelve, and it's helped me so 138 00:06:37,480 --> 00:06:40,400 Speaker 1: much because sometimes I think, like shit, like I've been 139 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,320 Speaker 1: through so many things, how the heck did I get here? 140 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,120 Speaker 1: And it's because of therapy. So I totally feel you 141 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:48,200 Speaker 1: on that. I feel you. On twenty twenty, it was 142 00:06:48,480 --> 00:06:50,920 Speaker 1: a year of like so much change for all of us, 143 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:53,960 Speaker 1: of course, but for me it was like whoa. It 144 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:56,919 Speaker 1: put a lot of things into perspective. So I totally 145 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: get you. And then just backpedaling a little bit because 146 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:02,440 Speaker 1: you did mention your dad and I know him pretty well. Yeah, 147 00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:06,760 Speaker 1: so he's your Mexican correct, Yeah, my dad? So your 148 00:07:06,839 --> 00:07:09,520 Speaker 1: dad is from I thought your dad was Mexican for 149 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:13,080 Speaker 1: some reason. I don't know, but his name is What 150 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,280 Speaker 1: was that like growing up with him? Is this famous 151 00:07:15,360 --> 00:07:19,040 Speaker 1: like radio jockey? Oh my god? You know what? Because 152 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:20,800 Speaker 1: you were in the same boat as me, I can 153 00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:24,840 Speaker 1: talk to you about this. It wasn't easy. Amazing girl, 154 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:30,680 Speaker 1: like so much expectation, you know how it is lasa 155 00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:32,200 Speaker 1: and you have to like sweep it on the rug 156 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:35,280 Speaker 1: and pretend like nothing's happening, and you're like, yeah, some 157 00:07:35,400 --> 00:07:41,640 Speaker 1: shit is going down. I don't know why. I starts 158 00:07:41,640 --> 00:07:44,120 Speaker 1: seeing finished. And they didn't explain to Caves very well 159 00:07:44,680 --> 00:07:47,720 Speaker 1: that my dad was famous. You know, I didn't. I 160 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,560 Speaker 1: didn't get it. They would they were. They didn't really 161 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:52,280 Speaker 1: explain the celebritiness. It just was what it was. And 162 00:07:52,360 --> 00:07:54,960 Speaker 1: so I remember going out to the movies or anything 163 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:57,360 Speaker 1: and people stopping him for pictures and autographs and I 164 00:07:57,400 --> 00:08:01,040 Speaker 1: got so mad. I'm like, it's a family time. Why 165 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:04,120 Speaker 1: And so that's tough it is. And then, you know, 166 00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,440 Speaker 1: I don't know about you, but even you know, sometimes 167 00:08:06,440 --> 00:08:08,120 Speaker 1: growing up, I didn't know if some friends were my 168 00:08:08,160 --> 00:08:11,560 Speaker 1: friends because of me or because of my dad. And 169 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:14,600 Speaker 1: you know, all some people didn't like me because I 170 00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:18,880 Speaker 1: was a rich bitch. Oh I hear you. I feel 171 00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:22,000 Speaker 1: you same. Same like I grew to say okay because 172 00:08:22,040 --> 00:08:23,680 Speaker 1: my mom would be like, well, these people feed us. 173 00:08:23,720 --> 00:08:25,560 Speaker 1: But sometimes they'd be like we're at Disneyland or we're 174 00:08:25,640 --> 00:08:27,320 Speaker 1: somewhere at the movies, and it's like I just want 175 00:08:27,360 --> 00:08:29,800 Speaker 1: my mom right now, like yeah, you yeah, I'm like 176 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,880 Speaker 1: I just want my mom, like I don't want the artists, 177 00:08:31,880 --> 00:08:33,960 Speaker 1: like you know, And it was so hard. Now I 178 00:08:34,000 --> 00:08:36,080 Speaker 1: understand because I'm like, oh shit, Like now I feel 179 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 1: bad for the people around me, and I feel like, 180 00:08:37,480 --> 00:08:40,080 Speaker 1: oh my god, hopefully they don't get annoyed. But like, 181 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:43,960 Speaker 1: as a child, it's tough. You don't know, and I 182 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:46,680 Speaker 1: don't think they explained it to us. But also I 183 00:08:46,760 --> 00:08:48,439 Speaker 1: have to understand that they didn't really know how to 184 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:50,680 Speaker 1: explain it to us. Like, if you think about it, 185 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:53,960 Speaker 1: my dad was first generation money, so was my mom. 186 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:55,840 Speaker 1: Like they didn't know what to do with that, or 187 00:08:56,040 --> 00:08:57,559 Speaker 1: and the fame. You know, you talk about it, but 188 00:08:57,679 --> 00:08:59,240 Speaker 1: no one prepares you for it you and I have 189 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:02,520 Speaker 1: the advantage that we can learn from their mistakes. And 190 00:09:02,679 --> 00:09:06,360 Speaker 1: also I don't know your first generation, right, I'm third, 191 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 1: your third Yeah, oh wow, that's crazy. See, I'm first generations. 192 00:09:10,400 --> 00:09:13,120 Speaker 1: My parents really just didn't know any better. Being first generation. 193 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:16,400 Speaker 1: Growing about here, it's like acclimating to American life and 194 00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:18,680 Speaker 1: keeping to my culture. It's like a whole thing. But 195 00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:20,760 Speaker 1: it was it was tough. Yeah, of course, as you 196 00:09:20,760 --> 00:09:23,520 Speaker 1: feel like, okay, if I become too quote unquote American 197 00:09:23,600 --> 00:09:25,240 Speaker 1: and I'm not going to be accepted by my people, 198 00:09:25,320 --> 00:09:27,719 Speaker 1: and it's kind of like, I think, now, what has 199 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:29,040 Speaker 1: helped me is kind of like I'm part of the 200 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:31,040 Speaker 1: two hundred percent club. You know, I'm one hundred percent 201 00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:33,240 Speaker 1: Mexican and I'm one hundred percent American, and I just 202 00:09:33,679 --> 00:09:36,160 Speaker 1: I'm lucky and we're blessed enough to have that, you know, 203 00:09:36,280 --> 00:09:38,720 Speaker 1: just embrace it. But growing up, it was like, oh, 204 00:09:38,760 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 1: you're too light skin like, uh, you don't fit in. 205 00:09:41,559 --> 00:09:43,160 Speaker 1: And then on the other side it was like, oh, no, 206 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: you're too Mexican. It was just like always trying to 207 00:09:44,880 --> 00:09:46,599 Speaker 1: find well, who the hell where do I fit in? 208 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:51,080 Speaker 1: And then your parent is famous. Yes, on top of that, 209 00:09:51,559 --> 00:09:57,360 Speaker 1: and scratching my car. Girl shut up at school. Yes, 210 00:09:57,440 --> 00:10:00,560 Speaker 1: my first call was Alexius see four thirty. It was 211 00:10:00,600 --> 00:10:03,360 Speaker 1: two thousand, I don't remember. But anyways, I'll have to 212 00:10:03,400 --> 00:10:05,640 Speaker 1: start parking in the teacher's parking lot because I got 213 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:10,800 Speaker 1: my car scratched. They scrolled car. My god, same same. 214 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:13,120 Speaker 1: I had a BMW my uncle. My uncle lupa about 215 00:10:13,160 --> 00:10:15,840 Speaker 1: it for me. And I changed so many different schools 216 00:10:15,840 --> 00:10:18,040 Speaker 1: because it's like I couldn't fit in anywhere, you know. 217 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:20,160 Speaker 1: So They're like, oh, they found out who my mom was, 218 00:10:20,160 --> 00:10:21,880 Speaker 1: Oh the little rich bitch and this and that, and 219 00:10:21,920 --> 00:10:24,600 Speaker 1: they would scratch my car and I was like, oh yes, 220 00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:27,160 Speaker 1: I'm like, what the Hell's not my fault? You sho 221 00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:31,160 Speaker 1: stuck up just because her dad or her mom. I'm like, 222 00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:34,640 Speaker 1: oh my god, oh my god, I feel you. Is 223 00:10:34,640 --> 00:10:37,680 Speaker 1: that why they called you like a diva and stuff? 224 00:10:37,840 --> 00:10:41,360 Speaker 1: Is that one of the res because I heard that somewhere. Yeah, 225 00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:42,920 Speaker 1: I mean a diva is a word that I hear 226 00:10:42,920 --> 00:10:46,240 Speaker 1: a lot. I mean, so I'm assuming yes, but I'll 227 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:50,120 Speaker 1: admit at the same time, my dad did raise me 228 00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:53,400 Speaker 1: to be a brat, like he really did. I mean, okay, 229 00:10:53,679 --> 00:10:55,360 Speaker 1: they didn't make me do any chores at home. I 230 00:10:55,400 --> 00:10:57,240 Speaker 1: don't know about you, but we did no chores. The 231 00:10:57,280 --> 00:11:00,480 Speaker 1: only chore I had was going to dance class as 232 00:11:00,520 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 1: being the best of karate, so that those were my chores. 233 00:11:03,320 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: But like he was like, you're the best of everything, 234 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:07,240 Speaker 1: and you're gonna be a star one day, blah blah blah. 235 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:09,160 Speaker 1: That's why I was so confident. But he didn't teach 236 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,640 Speaker 1: me about rejection. He didn't teach me about work, he 237 00:11:11,640 --> 00:11:13,520 Speaker 1: didn't teach me about how hard it wasna be. And 238 00:11:13,600 --> 00:11:15,200 Speaker 1: he was already famous. So I was like, oh, this 239 00:11:15,240 --> 00:11:18,280 Speaker 1: seems easy. This seems easy. Do you have siblings, Yeah, 240 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:22,280 Speaker 1: after younger sisters, your mom met all of us. Yeah, 241 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,959 Speaker 1: your mom was really good friends with my mom. Oh okay, 242 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,160 Speaker 1: I thought with your dad, but oh, oh my god, 243 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:29,200 Speaker 1: that's awesome. Yeah she returns with your dad, but my 244 00:11:29,200 --> 00:11:32,000 Speaker 1: mom and her got pretty close. Actually, oh wow, I 245 00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:35,520 Speaker 1: didn't know that. Yeah. What what's your mom's name, Beatina? 246 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:40,400 Speaker 1: I think I have pictures. Oh my god, that's crazy. Yeah, 247 00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:42,079 Speaker 1: because I remember there was a red carpet. I was 248 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:44,120 Speaker 1: nominated for an Alma Award, and your mom came up 249 00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:45,920 Speaker 1: to be so sweet. Because I think your mom even 250 00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:47,720 Speaker 1: came to my king Signeta or something, but she came 251 00:11:47,800 --> 00:11:49,079 Speaker 1: up to be so soon. It was like, I'm so 252 00:11:49,160 --> 00:11:52,360 Speaker 1: proud of you. I knew you were gonna would tell me. Yeah, yeah, 253 00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:54,760 Speaker 1: she would tell me. She's like, that's a who's daughter, baby, 254 00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:57,320 Speaker 1: and look what she's doing. She always wanted for me 255 00:11:57,360 --> 00:11:58,959 Speaker 1: to be an actress. She didn't want me to sing. 256 00:11:59,240 --> 00:12:01,360 Speaker 1: She says, also or it, but I want you to 257 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:03,520 Speaker 1: be an actress. I feel like that's better. It's easier, 258 00:12:03,559 --> 00:12:05,640 Speaker 1: like in the music, it's so hard now. I'm like, damn, 259 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,280 Speaker 1: mom She was right, but like so when she saw 260 00:12:08,320 --> 00:12:10,640 Speaker 1: you and she's like Meeta, mommy, like she look at 261 00:12:10,679 --> 00:12:12,719 Speaker 1: her like she's doing her thing, and she was very 262 00:12:12,760 --> 00:12:14,439 Speaker 1: proud of you, very very proud of you. So I 263 00:12:14,520 --> 00:12:16,360 Speaker 1: wanted to just tell you because I remember clearly. I 264 00:12:16,400 --> 00:12:18,319 Speaker 1: was like, I saw you at a red carpet. You 265 00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:20,120 Speaker 1: were taking pictures and we weren't able to say high 266 00:12:20,120 --> 00:12:22,880 Speaker 1: because everything was that crazy. Yeah, but I know of you, 267 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:24,680 Speaker 1: of course, I know who you are and everything and 268 00:12:24,760 --> 00:12:26,560 Speaker 1: what you're what you're doing, what you have done, which 269 00:12:26,600 --> 00:12:29,520 Speaker 1: I honestly like the fact you're representing us so well. 270 00:12:29,559 --> 00:12:31,720 Speaker 1: So thank you for that. So we have to be friends, 271 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:41,280 Speaker 1: damn it, Francia, Like, I feel like i'd vibe with you. Okay, 272 00:12:41,280 --> 00:12:43,280 Speaker 1: So let's talk a little bit about mental health because 273 00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:46,440 Speaker 1: it is something that I've gone through, and I want 274 00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:49,680 Speaker 1: to know what your take is on it, especially ever 275 00:12:49,760 --> 00:12:52,040 Speaker 1: since you know the pandemic, and I think that's when 276 00:12:52,080 --> 00:12:55,760 Speaker 1: most of us, like felt the anxiety and depression. I 277 00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:59,000 Speaker 1: know I did hardcore, but it helped me. What is 278 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:01,280 Speaker 1: your take on on what's going on and if we 279 00:13:01,320 --> 00:13:03,560 Speaker 1: should speak about it a little bit more, especially in 280 00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:06,560 Speaker 1: our culture, well in our culture especially, I think it's 281 00:13:06,640 --> 00:13:09,840 Speaker 1: super important to talk about And the reason I constantly 282 00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:13,520 Speaker 1: ask people what generation they are because I'm understanding that 283 00:13:13,600 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 1: each generation goes through something different. On first generation, so 284 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:20,520 Speaker 1: I'm literally like, okay, navigating too worlds, and my parents 285 00:13:20,559 --> 00:13:22,319 Speaker 1: think that if I go to therapy, I'm going to 286 00:13:22,440 --> 00:13:24,840 Speaker 1: end up in a psychord like there's such a stigma 287 00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:27,720 Speaker 1: behind it. I would encourage I'm first energy, so my 288 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:30,320 Speaker 1: kids would be second generation, so I would actually encourage that. 289 00:13:30,480 --> 00:13:33,240 Speaker 1: Now that those kinds have just changed, like it's actually 290 00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:36,559 Speaker 1: just recently, I think the pandemic opened the doors law 291 00:13:36,640 --> 00:13:39,439 Speaker 1: and I appreciate that the world is now more understanding 292 00:13:39,679 --> 00:13:42,840 Speaker 1: of mental health issues and what it can cause us 293 00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:45,920 Speaker 1: because now we have a lot more resources. But in 294 00:13:45,960 --> 00:13:50,200 Speaker 1: our culture, man, it's just so important for us to 295 00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:54,640 Speaker 1: talk about us navigating too worlds, especially because we look 296 00:13:54,720 --> 00:13:58,200 Speaker 1: different and we're in a season of unlearning a lot 297 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:05,040 Speaker 1: of things culturally, politically, human wise. So I think it's 298 00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:07,520 Speaker 1: just a lot of change, and especially our generation, like 299 00:14:07,559 --> 00:14:10,120 Speaker 1: we were born at a time when the internet wasn't 300 00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:12,520 Speaker 1: even what it is today. We grew I mean, I 301 00:14:12,559 --> 00:14:15,200 Speaker 1: remember dial up. So I think especially for us growing 302 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:17,840 Speaker 1: up where we're constantly going through a lot of changes, 303 00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:21,520 Speaker 1: is really necessary, especially with our parents, who I mean 304 00:14:21,640 --> 00:14:24,320 Speaker 1: never even had cell phones, I imagine the changes are 305 00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:26,600 Speaker 1: going through. So I think, yea more so than anything 306 00:14:26,600 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 1: with mental health, I think the first thing to for 307 00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:33,280 Speaker 1: us to do is to understand and forgive and have grace. 308 00:14:33,440 --> 00:14:35,600 Speaker 1: Like I was we were talking about our parents earlier, 309 00:14:36,160 --> 00:14:38,480 Speaker 1: I have to tell myself and repeat, they didn't know 310 00:14:38,520 --> 00:14:42,720 Speaker 1: any better, they didn't understand. I grew up differently, they're 311 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:45,560 Speaker 1: from a different generation. I have to have grace for 312 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:47,120 Speaker 1: the way that they're talking to me, or the way 313 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:48,960 Speaker 1: they're viewing me, or for the way that they raised me, 314 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: and it's my job now at thirty four almost thirty 315 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:55,240 Speaker 1: five years old, to change the way that or change 316 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:58,280 Speaker 1: the plugs that they put into my brain and like 317 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:01,520 Speaker 1: just reorder them as far as how I view the world, 318 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:04,560 Speaker 1: how I view myself, how I view relationships. I'm still 319 00:15:04,600 --> 00:15:07,080 Speaker 1: single at you know, at this age, and I never 320 00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:10,920 Speaker 1: thought that would be because you know, culturally it's unheard of, right, 321 00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:13,400 Speaker 1: but it's it's also not a bad thing. And I'm 322 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:15,360 Speaker 1: glad and thank you for saying that I represent Latina 323 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:17,400 Speaker 1: as well, because I'm really trying. I'm also trying to 324 00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,040 Speaker 1: now is a thirty four year old single woman, like 325 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:22,440 Speaker 1: you know, kind of bleed out that stigma that we 326 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:25,200 Speaker 1: have to be young when we get married, young, when 327 00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:29,080 Speaker 1: we have kids, or you know, we're no good. Absolutely, 328 00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:31,800 Speaker 1: that's something that I had to kind of a hump 329 00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:35,720 Speaker 1: in the road that I had to just overcome. Was oh, 330 00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:39,160 Speaker 1: like you yeah, I was married and I got divorced 331 00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:40,840 Speaker 1: and I have no kids yet, and oh are my 332 00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:43,920 Speaker 1: like the fact that I have to do perhaps IVF 333 00:15:43,960 --> 00:15:45,600 Speaker 1: to get pregnant if I want kids. It's kind of 334 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:47,240 Speaker 1: like for a long time in our culture, it was 335 00:15:47,280 --> 00:15:50,280 Speaker 1: my eggs you did, good job. I'm so proud of you. 336 00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:52,920 Speaker 1: I haven't done it yet, and I think it takes 337 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:55,240 Speaker 1: so much pressure off because it's kind of like, oh, 338 00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:57,280 Speaker 1: you got to go that route. You're broken. It's that's 339 00:15:57,400 --> 00:16:00,800 Speaker 1: you know, no cedras and its way no no, no no. 340 00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:03,000 Speaker 1: Things have changed, and like what you said is having 341 00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:06,360 Speaker 1: grace and just understanding people that came before us and 342 00:16:06,440 --> 00:16:09,000 Speaker 1: our grandparents and even my mom. She was very like 343 00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:11,720 Speaker 1: open minded and very hip, a very hip mom, but 344 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:14,920 Speaker 1: she was also very traditional, you know what I mean 345 00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,560 Speaker 1: in certain things that I'm like, Okay, now I have 346 00:16:17,600 --> 00:16:19,840 Speaker 1: more compassion for her now that I've gotten older or whatever. 347 00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:23,480 Speaker 1: But absolutely I think that everything you're saying about mental 348 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:26,760 Speaker 1: health and making it okay like along for a long time. 349 00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 1: I mean, I think it's getting a little better, but 350 00:16:28,520 --> 00:16:32,480 Speaker 1: it's like boys don't cry, you know, and it's like, okay, guys, 351 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:34,600 Speaker 1: should you know it's okay to be vulnerable, it's okay 352 00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:37,000 Speaker 1: to do therapy. That doesn't mean that there's something wrong 353 00:16:37,040 --> 00:16:38,680 Speaker 1: with you. It's no worse. See, I think we all 354 00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:41,560 Speaker 1: need it, right But okay, So that's a great example. 355 00:16:41,680 --> 00:16:45,480 Speaker 1: I totally agree. But because I was raised for so 356 00:16:45,520 --> 00:16:48,080 Speaker 1: many years believing that a man is in a man 357 00:16:48,080 --> 00:16:51,560 Speaker 1: if he cries. I still get uncomfortable when a man cries. Really, 358 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:53,760 Speaker 1: it makes me so uncomfortable. So I have to sit 359 00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:57,040 Speaker 1: back and be like, Okay, I'm uncomfortable because this is 360 00:16:57,040 --> 00:17:01,120 Speaker 1: what I was taught. This is okay, I he's allowed 361 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:03,400 Speaker 1: to cry. He's a human being. So it's like retraining, 362 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:05,280 Speaker 1: and I think that's where a lot of our mental 363 00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:09,600 Speaker 1: health issues also stem from the retraining, the relearning. It's insane, 364 00:17:09,600 --> 00:17:11,560 Speaker 1: and it could be something as simple as that that's 365 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:14,159 Speaker 1: going it triggered anyone that's listening right now, or something 366 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:16,239 Speaker 1: else that was triggling, Like you know, there's a lot 367 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:20,480 Speaker 1: of tweets about what parents say to us when we're little. 368 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:23,960 Speaker 1: Like let's say, if you rip the banana, you're gonna faint, 369 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:28,840 Speaker 1: and then it happens one time, you're like oh yeah, yeah, 370 00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:31,400 Speaker 1: So like how long does it take you to understand 371 00:17:31,440 --> 00:17:33,200 Speaker 1: that just because you rip the banana, you don't faint, 372 00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:36,359 Speaker 1: you know, or something like that. So it's hard. It's 373 00:17:36,400 --> 00:17:39,159 Speaker 1: it's a trigger. So even that I'm like, okay, I 374 00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:41,280 Speaker 1: have to understand if it was a different time, it 375 00:17:41,320 --> 00:17:44,320 Speaker 1: was a different time. This is morally correct, this is 376 00:17:44,400 --> 00:17:47,119 Speaker 1: not this is old, it's not traditional. We're in a 377 00:17:47,119 --> 00:17:51,880 Speaker 1: new world. It's it's hard. Yeah, it's giving yourself that therapy, 378 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:53,880 Speaker 1: you know what I mean, it's just speaking to yourself. 379 00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:56,640 Speaker 1: And one thing from the short time that like we've 380 00:17:56,680 --> 00:17:59,760 Speaker 1: been speaking and talking, it's like you're very very enlightened. 381 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,119 Speaker 1: Like I don't think you're a smart woman, Like I 382 00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:06,679 Speaker 1: can tell you've done your internal work. And and I 383 00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:09,199 Speaker 1: did hear on Jay Shetty, you your interview a few 384 00:18:09,280 --> 00:18:12,080 Speaker 1: years back where your journal. Do you still do that 385 00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:14,680 Speaker 1: journal and write letters to God or no? Yeah, I 386 00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:18,000 Speaker 1: still have. I've been pretty bad about it lately because 387 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,719 Speaker 1: I've been more focused on meditating differently. It's so funny 388 00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:23,879 Speaker 1: that Jay Shetty podcast that you brought up, because I 389 00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:26,880 Speaker 1: just talked to him the other day and I said, Jay, 390 00:18:26,880 --> 00:18:29,680 Speaker 1: I really want to do that interview again, and he was, yeah, okay, 391 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:32,320 Speaker 1: and I was like no, seriously, I was so depressed 392 00:18:32,760 --> 00:18:36,040 Speaker 1: during that time that like every not everything I said, 393 00:18:36,080 --> 00:18:37,800 Speaker 1: I was I can't even listen to it. But also 394 00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:40,320 Speaker 1: I was like I wore a baseball cap and a sweater. 395 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:43,000 Speaker 1: I was very tired. I wouldn't wear any makeup, but 396 00:18:43,040 --> 00:18:45,040 Speaker 1: I was like, I also just didn't feel good about myself. 397 00:18:45,080 --> 00:18:48,359 Speaker 1: I was so depressed and that relationship I was in 398 00:18:48,359 --> 00:18:51,040 Speaker 1: that I was talking about wasn't great and I was 399 00:18:51,320 --> 00:18:56,119 Speaker 1: blaming myself in the podcast about it, and I was like, wow, 400 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,840 Speaker 1: I'm still doing this to myself. So we broke up 401 00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,359 Speaker 1: right before the pandemic, which is probably the least thing 402 00:19:01,359 --> 00:19:03,199 Speaker 1: that could have happened to me, because I did not 403 00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:06,000 Speaker 1: love myself. And I'm not saying it's his fault. Is like, 404 00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:10,640 Speaker 1: I've been in relationships just like that since I was seventeen, 405 00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:14,200 Speaker 1: and every person after that it was the same as 406 00:19:14,359 --> 00:19:17,199 Speaker 1: the first time I was verbally abused. So yeah, I 407 00:19:17,320 --> 00:19:20,280 Speaker 1: was really really depressed. Oh my god, dude, the fact 408 00:19:20,280 --> 00:19:21,600 Speaker 1: that you were with J Shatty, Like that's one of 409 00:19:21,640 --> 00:19:24,080 Speaker 1: my dreams. I love him so much, Like and you 410 00:19:24,119 --> 00:19:25,680 Speaker 1: should you should do it again. I mean, and there's 411 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:27,239 Speaker 1: nothing wrong with looking back and saying, you know what, 412 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:29,600 Speaker 1: I was in a different place at that time, and 413 00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:31,520 Speaker 1: now I'm ready. Now I feel different. Now I want 414 00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:34,000 Speaker 1: to share because still you touched me, You touch my heart, 415 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:36,840 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Yeah, so that's you know, 416 00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:39,520 Speaker 1: but now I can definitely tell like you're in a 417 00:19:39,520 --> 00:19:41,919 Speaker 1: different place, and I think that's what evolving is all about. 418 00:19:42,280 --> 00:19:44,439 Speaker 1: And right now you are single. Is it the longest 419 00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:47,320 Speaker 1: time you've been single? You know, that's hard to say because, 420 00:19:47,880 --> 00:19:50,240 Speaker 1: oh god, this is going to sound terrible. So I've 421 00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:54,440 Speaker 1: been single for coming on four years. Prior to him, 422 00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:57,399 Speaker 1: I was single. I dated a lot of men, but 423 00:19:57,480 --> 00:20:00,840 Speaker 1: I wasn't in a relationship longer than maybe months. Okay, 424 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,760 Speaker 1: So I'm like, Okay, So prior to him, I had 425 00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,919 Speaker 1: broken up with someone in two thousand and ten, you know, 426 00:20:06,000 --> 00:20:07,960 Speaker 1: so I get I would say that was a long period. 427 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:09,960 Speaker 1: I was just staying alone. This is the first time 428 00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:13,440 Speaker 1: that I've been single, and I haven't dated as much 429 00:20:13,480 --> 00:20:17,040 Speaker 1: as I did prior. Okay, So I've spent more time 430 00:20:17,080 --> 00:20:20,040 Speaker 1: alone this time around than the last. The pandemic health 431 00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:21,560 Speaker 1: I was caught up on one dude, you know how 432 00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:25,520 Speaker 1: that is? Yeah, I feel you. I feel caught up, 433 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:27,679 Speaker 1: caught up and you're like, I know this is not 434 00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:31,000 Speaker 1: supposed to happen. Yeah, but there's something that draws you 435 00:20:31,040 --> 00:20:33,639 Speaker 1: to those things. It's like those little like little boxica us. 436 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:38,400 Speaker 1: It's like, hold on, Yeah, that looked I was just lonely. 437 00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:40,399 Speaker 1: I was lonely. So let me go back to what 438 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:43,119 Speaker 1: I know. Yeah, we've we've all had those moments. I 439 00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:44,919 Speaker 1: totally feel you ain't no shame in that is. As 440 00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:47,280 Speaker 1: long as you learn, you know, there's always something to learn. 441 00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:56,160 Speaker 1: So we were talking about self confidence because for me, 442 00:20:56,320 --> 00:20:59,440 Speaker 1: I feel like you're very like a very confident, outspoken 443 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:03,040 Speaker 1: type of of girl woman. Whatever did it come like 444 00:21:03,119 --> 00:21:06,160 Speaker 1: out of nowhere, Like you've always been that way since 445 00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:07,960 Speaker 1: you were Obviously there's a lot of confidence if you're 446 00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,480 Speaker 1: going to like dance and stuff like that at five 447 00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:12,200 Speaker 1: years old. And no, I think I was very confident 448 00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:14,840 Speaker 1: because I said, like, my parents were pretty good about 449 00:21:14,840 --> 00:21:19,080 Speaker 1: implanting that in me up until I was I wanted 450 00:21:19,040 --> 00:21:23,760 Speaker 1: to say till after my first show was canceled, because 451 00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:25,159 Speaker 1: then I was back in real life and I was like, 452 00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:27,440 Speaker 1: I should be easy after this, and it wasn't. So 453 00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:31,080 Speaker 1: after that I lost a lot of it, and also relationships. 454 00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:32,960 Speaker 1: Like I said, I lost a lot of my confidence. 455 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:36,280 Speaker 1: When I was seventeen, I was staying an older man 456 00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:40,880 Speaker 1: for three years, so that started joindling it. And then 457 00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:43,040 Speaker 1: when my show Dog canceled, I guess it got worse. 458 00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:46,200 Speaker 1: And I think recently what happened is during the pandemic, 459 00:21:46,359 --> 00:21:49,360 Speaker 1: I was by myself, just lent me and my job 460 00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:51,560 Speaker 1: that I had to deal with myself. I had to 461 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:55,199 Speaker 1: deal with my own demons, and I'll be honest, I 462 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,840 Speaker 1: did trooms by myself, and it was the best thing 463 00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:00,880 Speaker 1: that could have happened to me. Same here, love shrubs, 464 00:22:02,080 --> 00:22:05,120 Speaker 1: I'm micro dos. Oh good, you should I do every 465 00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 1: now and then too. Girl. I was looking in the 466 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:09,040 Speaker 1: mirror and I was like, you are a bad bitch. 467 00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:11,880 Speaker 1: What are you talking about? Look at you? And for 468 00:22:11,920 --> 00:22:14,639 Speaker 1: some reason I had a Shania Twain I feel like 469 00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:17,479 Speaker 1: a woman on repeat. I was just dancing You're up. 470 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:21,800 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love that song. Oh it just 471 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:24,760 Speaker 1: makes you feel so badass. I got it. And ever 472 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:28,480 Speaker 1: since then, like I said, the confidence just started coming out. 473 00:22:28,600 --> 00:22:31,119 Speaker 1: I mean it took some time. It wasn't overnight, you know. 474 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:34,359 Speaker 1: I was slowly like testing the waters to see little things. 475 00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,159 Speaker 1: And then when I dyed my hair red, like I 476 00:22:36,240 --> 00:22:38,760 Speaker 1: told you a month ago, I have been a different person. 477 00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:41,080 Speaker 1: Like thank you for saying that. I feel like the light. 478 00:22:41,119 --> 00:22:42,880 Speaker 1: I've been actually hearing that a lot, and I can 479 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,280 Speaker 1: tell you that for the first time, probably ever in 480 00:22:45,359 --> 00:22:47,600 Speaker 1: my life, I'm starting to really learn myself and like 481 00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:50,880 Speaker 1: myself and this whole Jessica Rabbit Pois and I everything 482 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:55,440 Speaker 1: like it's really doing. Dude, I love my thirties because 483 00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:58,800 Speaker 1: what you're talking about right now, right like so many women, 484 00:22:59,359 --> 00:23:00,800 Speaker 1: we mean me too. I'm not gonna lie, but like 485 00:23:00,800 --> 00:23:02,879 Speaker 1: I'm afraid sometimes of like even saying my age or 486 00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:05,480 Speaker 1: whatever because in the type of industry that I'm in. 487 00:23:06,520 --> 00:23:09,080 Speaker 1: But then I'm like, wait, like we've done so much. 488 00:23:09,119 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 1: I'm fucking proud of myself, and I just I don't know. 489 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:13,399 Speaker 1: In my twenties, I was just trying to figure it out. 490 00:23:13,440 --> 00:23:15,159 Speaker 1: I feel like, don't get married, don't do it on 491 00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:17,479 Speaker 1: that stuff. In my personal opinion, when you're in your twenties, 492 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:20,399 Speaker 1: in your thirties, you start like loving yourself more and 493 00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:23,200 Speaker 1: it takes time. Like you said, like affirmations in the mirror. 494 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:25,320 Speaker 1: You are a badass, you got this. You are healthy, 495 00:23:25,359 --> 00:23:27,600 Speaker 1: you are wealthy, You're a vibrant I tell myself, and 496 00:23:27,880 --> 00:23:30,520 Speaker 1: the more you say it, the better you feel. But 497 00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:34,280 Speaker 1: like loving really yourself laws and all, Like right now, 498 00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:36,880 Speaker 1: I hear you, and you're like you admit to certain things, 499 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:38,920 Speaker 1: and I totally respect that there's so much power in 500 00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 1: bolder reality, and you're like saying there's certain things, how 501 00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:43,840 Speaker 1: how I was raised, or you're very honest, like that 502 00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:47,520 Speaker 1: says so much about a person. So I completely like 503 00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:49,280 Speaker 1: it's so admirable. So I just wanted to tell you 504 00:23:49,320 --> 00:23:52,480 Speaker 1: that because it takes, especially being in this industry and 505 00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:54,879 Speaker 1: I think like as a Latina being an actress, being 506 00:23:54,880 --> 00:24:00,560 Speaker 1: a singer, the rejection, the comparison, it's just so much. 507 00:24:02,760 --> 00:24:06,800 Speaker 1: Yeah dude, okay, yeah, so that why? Why is that? 508 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:10,919 Speaker 1: There's two reasons. One, I always I wanted to do 509 00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:13,359 Speaker 1: this by myself. I did not want my dad to 510 00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:17,080 Speaker 1: get credited for anything. Not that I was embarrassed, but 511 00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:19,480 Speaker 1: I just wanted to know that I did it. We're 512 00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:22,439 Speaker 1: so much, I don't I didn't like favors. Yeah, so 513 00:24:22,800 --> 00:24:25,159 Speaker 1: I remember I did franci A Mendees for bringing it on. 514 00:24:25,240 --> 00:24:27,040 Speaker 1: And as soon as I saw that last name, I 515 00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:29,320 Speaker 1: was like, no, it has very says my middle name. 516 00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:33,520 Speaker 1: Also too. My dad did say that one of my 517 00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:42,639 Speaker 1: sisters and I were born. He was like yosa. I 518 00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:44,320 Speaker 1: was like, all right, well this is what you said, dad, 519 00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:47,840 Speaker 1: so here it is, and it does. I love it. 520 00:24:47,840 --> 00:24:51,359 Speaker 1: It just flows really nice, flows really really nice. Um, 521 00:24:51,520 --> 00:24:54,040 Speaker 1: I get you and so many people. Let's just have 522 00:24:54,080 --> 00:24:56,399 Speaker 1: this conversation because I feel you're gonna understand me. I 523 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:59,040 Speaker 1: don't go by Rivera. I never have. And people think 524 00:24:59,080 --> 00:25:01,399 Speaker 1: that it's something new because there's issues in the family. 525 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 1: Yes and no, but no, it's I want to be 526 00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:08,080 Speaker 1: seen as cheekies. Okay, my name is Jennie Matine. I 527 00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:10,280 Speaker 1: love my name. Yes, my dad did some pretty messed 528 00:25:10,359 --> 00:25:13,560 Speaker 1: up things, Okay, we forgive him, moving on now, it's cheeky. 529 00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:15,600 Speaker 1: That's my artist name. And I want people to see 530 00:25:15,640 --> 00:25:19,080 Speaker 1: me for me, not always liked. Yes, it's an honor. 531 00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,080 Speaker 1: I love what my mom did. I like hands like honestly, 532 00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:26,119 Speaker 1: it's a blessing. It's it's an honor. But see me 533 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:28,480 Speaker 1: for me, for what I do, for my story, for 534 00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:31,960 Speaker 1: my experience. Don't always just I don't know. Like, I'm 535 00:25:32,040 --> 00:25:34,040 Speaker 1: very proud of what all my family has accomplished. But 536 00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:36,160 Speaker 1: I want to leave my own footprint. And I don't 537 00:25:36,160 --> 00:25:37,960 Speaker 1: need the last name. I can be any last name, 538 00:25:38,119 --> 00:25:39,720 Speaker 1: and I'm still if I'm meant to do what I'm 539 00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,160 Speaker 1: gonna do. What I'm doing, it's because that's God's will 540 00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:44,720 Speaker 1: for my life. You know what I mean. So people 541 00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:46,720 Speaker 1: see it in a negative way, but it's like, no, 542 00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,240 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't, I don't know. I think it's great, 543 00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:52,679 Speaker 1: thank you. And I feel like for people that haven't 544 00:25:52,680 --> 00:25:55,480 Speaker 1: been in our position, maybe need an explanation of like why. 545 00:25:56,119 --> 00:25:58,639 Speaker 1: And the best thing that I could think of is 546 00:25:59,119 --> 00:26:02,560 Speaker 1: when you're compared airing or you have that last name, 547 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,399 Speaker 1: automatically sink get it. You start judging a book by 548 00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:09,080 Speaker 1: its cover, and then there's an expectation that is said 549 00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:12,160 Speaker 1: on us, and if we don't meet that, it's disappointing 550 00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:15,040 Speaker 1: and you're already expecting me to fail and I haven't 551 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:18,200 Speaker 1: even started. So let me come as it cleansely as 552 00:26:18,240 --> 00:26:20,800 Speaker 1: my own individual and not someone that you can compare 553 00:26:20,840 --> 00:26:23,960 Speaker 1: me to. Anyone would understand this. You when you get 554 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 1: in a relationship, you don't want to be compared to 555 00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:29,679 Speaker 1: the X. That's like hell no, so don't compare me 556 00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:34,119 Speaker 1: to an individual that raised me. Yes, but they're different 557 00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,520 Speaker 1: than who I am. My dad grew uping on Dudas. 558 00:26:36,520 --> 00:26:40,000 Speaker 1: He's an immigrant here. I was born in La I'm 559 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:43,399 Speaker 1: a native here. We're different and we're going to choose 560 00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:46,480 Speaker 1: different paths and we're going to be our, our, each 561 00:26:46,480 --> 00:26:49,960 Speaker 1: individual person, because my dad portrayed himself one way. If 562 00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:51,680 Speaker 1: I go the other way, I already know I'm gonna 563 00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:56,040 Speaker 1: be judged. So I don't want to be identified as Lasade. 564 00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,600 Speaker 1: I want to be identified as an individual to drop 565 00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:01,680 Speaker 1: the expectations and if I mess up, oh wow, that's 566 00:27:01,680 --> 00:27:04,520 Speaker 1: just Francia or if Chikisa someday, it's like, oh wow, 567 00:27:04,560 --> 00:27:08,240 Speaker 1: that's just Chiki's not I'm life honey, Jenny Amita. Okay, 568 00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:11,680 Speaker 1: so yes, oh my god, you explained it perfectly better 569 00:27:11,680 --> 00:27:13,639 Speaker 1: than I could ever. Now I'm like, okay, yes, this 570 00:27:13,760 --> 00:27:15,800 Speaker 1: is now. I'm going to use that in my in 571 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:19,600 Speaker 1: my interviews. That's a lot of therapy. Girl, Yeah, girl, 572 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,159 Speaker 1: I know. Oh my gosh, I'm telling you guys, therapy 573 00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:24,800 Speaker 1: is everything. Like it's helped me life coaching. Have you 574 00:27:24,840 --> 00:27:27,760 Speaker 1: done life coaching? No, I have been done life coaching. No. 575 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:31,280 Speaker 1: I feel like acting and these scripts are enough life 576 00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:34,760 Speaker 1: coaching for me. Plus my therapist. You're absolutely right, you're 577 00:27:34,840 --> 00:27:36,919 Speaker 1: you know what, Yeah, because I went I did some 578 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:40,720 Speaker 1: acting like classes and it really just helps you. Like 579 00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:43,040 Speaker 1: for me, it helped me. It was more of like 580 00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,159 Speaker 1: being able to We did it for like being on 581 00:27:45,200 --> 00:27:48,520 Speaker 1: stage and removing yourself from who you are and stepping 582 00:27:48,560 --> 00:27:52,240 Speaker 1: into someone else's shoes and forgetting all like you know, 583 00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:54,400 Speaker 1: so it really did. It absolutely helped me. I want 584 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:56,360 Speaker 1: to take more acting classes. Actually, yeah, I think that's 585 00:27:56,359 --> 00:27:58,520 Speaker 1: how that helped me learn grace because stepping into other 586 00:27:58,520 --> 00:28:01,200 Speaker 1: people's shoes and understanding their traumas and it's not too 587 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:03,360 Speaker 1: far fetched from mine. That makes me feel like, oh, 588 00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:09,040 Speaker 1: everyone is just in pain. That's it. Everyone's just in pain. Yes, yeah, 589 00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:10,840 Speaker 1: And what are you working on right now? I'm on 590 00:28:10,920 --> 00:28:15,119 Speaker 1: hiatus right now. So we just finished filming in February 591 00:28:15,280 --> 00:28:18,840 Speaker 1: and I went to Trinidad for a week for Carnival. 592 00:28:19,400 --> 00:28:21,440 Speaker 1: It was so much fun, and then I to go 593 00:28:21,480 --> 00:28:24,400 Speaker 1: in New York after. So I just got back at 594 00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:27,920 Speaker 1: the beginning of March. I'm working on a salasa line, 595 00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:32,280 Speaker 1: like to eat Salasa um. Yeah, I'm developing that. So 596 00:28:32,320 --> 00:28:34,199 Speaker 1: I'm working on stuff outside of acting, but right now 597 00:28:34,240 --> 00:28:36,200 Speaker 1: I'm taking a break. Oh girl, you gotta send me 598 00:28:36,240 --> 00:28:38,120 Speaker 1: your sala sas out for sure. I'm a huge I 599 00:28:38,200 --> 00:28:41,200 Speaker 1: love salasa and everything, so oh my god. Then yeah, 600 00:28:41,240 --> 00:28:43,280 Speaker 1: so when we hang out, I'll make some for mean, 601 00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:44,480 Speaker 1: you could just come to the house, so I'll have 602 00:28:44,520 --> 00:28:47,520 Speaker 1: a little situation. Oh my god, I love yeah, thank you, 603 00:28:48,000 --> 00:28:51,280 Speaker 1: um but any who, Honestly, I've enjoyed this conversation. I'm 604 00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:53,640 Speaker 1: so glad we were able to talk because I feel 605 00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:56,440 Speaker 1: like we have a lot in common and I feel you, 606 00:28:56,600 --> 00:28:59,400 Speaker 1: I get you, and I think you're doing an amazing job. 607 00:29:00,120 --> 00:29:03,719 Speaker 1: Thank you for being vulnerable, for inspiring us all. And 608 00:29:04,120 --> 00:29:07,480 Speaker 1: we need to go to lunch for sure. And oh, 609 00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:09,239 Speaker 1: do you want to share your social media for us 610 00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:11,680 Speaker 1: all of us like anything website or social media, anything 611 00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:14,040 Speaker 1: that you want to like share. Yes, you can find 612 00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:18,600 Speaker 1: me on Instagram and Facebook. I'm gonna be honest. My 613 00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:20,480 Speaker 1: Facebook is the same as my Instagram, so I would 614 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:24,240 Speaker 1: just go there and TikTok they're both frances. I do 615 00:29:24,320 --> 00:29:27,160 Speaker 1: not have a Twitter anymore of people. I deactivated it. 616 00:29:27,280 --> 00:29:29,000 Speaker 1: I needed to get out and have a break from 617 00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:31,800 Speaker 1: one social media page, so that was one I chose. 618 00:29:31,840 --> 00:29:37,680 Speaker 1: So TikTok and Instagram. Thanks, thanks, I love it. Okay, well, 619 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:39,080 Speaker 1: thank you so much. And you guys know that I 620 00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:47,520 Speaker 1: always end every episode with a motivational quote. So the 621 00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:49,840 Speaker 1: quote is very simple. It's very simple, and I think 622 00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:53,080 Speaker 1: it goes with what we've been talking about. But listen, clearly, 623 00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,840 Speaker 1: rejection is God's protection. You guys. That is a quote 624 00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:58,960 Speaker 1: that I want to leave you with. Sometimes when one 625 00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:01,959 Speaker 1: door closes in our face, like Francia said, it does 626 00:30:02,000 --> 00:30:05,280 Speaker 1: affect our confidence. And just know that maybe that's happening 627 00:30:05,320 --> 00:30:07,280 Speaker 1: for a reason, because it's a blessing in disguise and 628 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,000 Speaker 1: something better is coming. So AnyWho, that's all I wanted 629 00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:11,600 Speaker 1: to say you guys, thank you so much. Thank you 630 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:14,320 Speaker 1: for being with me every single Monday. Francia, you are 631 00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:22,960 Speaker 1: the bomb girl Netta, and I'll see you soon. Do 632 00:30:23,000 --> 00:30:27,520 Speaker 1: you need advice on love, relationships, health emas. I'm so 633 00:30:27,560 --> 00:30:29,800 Speaker 1: excited to share with you that my Cheekies and Chill 634 00:30:29,880 --> 00:30:33,360 Speaker 1: podcast will have an extra episode drop each week. I'll 635 00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:40,360 Speaker 1: be answering all your questions. Just leave me a voice message. 636 00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:42,600 Speaker 1: All you have to do is go to speak pype 637 00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:46,080 Speaker 1: dot com slash Cheekies and Chill Podcast and record your questions. 638 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:52,080 Speaker 1: I can't wait to hear from you. This is a 639 00:30:52,160 --> 00:30:57,480 Speaker 1: production of iHeartRadio and podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram 640 00:30:57,480 --> 00:31:01,920 Speaker 1: at michaela Podcasts and follow me Cheekies That's c hi Quis. 641 00:31:02,480 --> 00:31:06,880 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, 642 00:31:07,040 --> 00:31:09,840 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast, and check 643 00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:10,960 Speaker 1: us out on YouTube.