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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Good Stuff. I'm Jacob Shick and I'm

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Speaker 1: joined by my co host and wife, Ashley Schiff.

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Speaker 2: Jacob is a third generation combat Marine and I'm a

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Speaker 2: gold Star granddaughter, and we work together to serve military veterans,

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Speaker 2: first responders, frontline healthcare workers, and their families with mental

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Speaker 2: and emotional wellness through traditional and non traditional therapy.

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Speaker 3: At One Tribe Foundation, we.

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Speaker 1: Believe everyone has a story to tell, not only about

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Speaker 1: the peaks, but also the valleys they've been through to

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Speaker 1: get them to where they are today.

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Speaker 2: And each week we invite a guest to tell us

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Speaker 2: their story, to share with us the lessons they've learned

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Speaker 2: that shape who they are and what they're doing to

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Speaker 2: pay it forward and give back.

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Speaker 1: Our mission with this show is to dig deep into

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Speaker 1: our guest's journey so that we can celebrate the hope

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Speaker 1: and inspiration their story has to offer.

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Speaker 3: We're thrilled you're joining us again.

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Speaker 1: Welcome to the Good Stuff.

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Speaker 2: You might have heard of our guests today, John Wayne Troxall.

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Speaker 2: He was the senior enlisted advisor to the Chairman of

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Speaker 2: the Joint Chiefs of Staff and the senior non commissioned

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Speaker 2: officer in the US Armed Forces.

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Speaker 1: You retired in twenty nineteen after thirty eight years of

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Speaker 1: service for our Greek country, and we have the honor

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Speaker 1: of hearing him tell part of his story, the successes

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Speaker 1: and hardships that accompanied a life of service.

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Speaker 2: Even though this was our first time meeting him via zoom,

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Speaker 2: we really enjoyed getting to know John.

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Speaker 3: First.

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Speaker 2: We just want to welcome you to the show. John

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Speaker 2: Wayne Troxall, thank you so much for joining us here

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Speaker 2: on the good Stuff. We haven't had the pleasure of

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Speaker 2: meeting you in person yet.

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Speaker 4: Yes, absolutely, Jack and Ashley, it's an honor to meet

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Speaker 4: you all, but more of an honor that I'm allowed

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Speaker 4: to come on here and share my story with you all.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, and we're so excited to dig In born in

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Speaker 2: Iowa and then served our great country for over thirty

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Speaker 2: seven years.

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Speaker 1: He's a couple of minutes. Yeah, Yeah, how do I

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Speaker 1: address you? I mean, mister secretary?

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Speaker 4: What do you do?

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Speaker 1: Because look, I got out of the Marine Corps with

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Speaker 1: well more than one page eleven. I'm just gonna guess

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Speaker 1: means you and I could get along just fine.

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Speaker 4: I prefer you to call me John. I try not

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Speaker 4: to be lost in my museum. I was the SAAC,

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Speaker 4: I was a sergeant major and everything. I'm a retired

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Speaker 4: guy now and so I just try to be who

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Speaker 4: I am and what I'll always be, and that's John

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Speaker 4: Wayne Troxel. So John would be fine.

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Speaker 3: I dig it awesome.

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Speaker 2: Well, the joy of this show is getting to share

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Speaker 2: amazing stories with our audience. But today Jake and I

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Speaker 2: are truly part of the audience ourselves, because you know,

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Speaker 2: we aren't yet familiar with you or your story. So

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Speaker 2: if you would do us the honor, just start from

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Speaker 2: the beginning.

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Speaker 4: I grew up in a loving household, and as I

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Speaker 4: got older, although it was a loving household, I was

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Speaker 4: a mediocre athlete. I was a wrestler. I was a

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Speaker 4: pretty good student until I started discovering girls and beer.

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Speaker 4: And then I think, Jake, you know how that goes

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Speaker 4: all of a sudden, can go south in a hurry.

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Speaker 1: No, but I know how that never happened.

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Speaker 4: I was looking for purpose and direction, and as I

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Speaker 4: was going through high school, I wrestled until I was

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Speaker 4: a junior, and then my senior year, I said, look,

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Speaker 4: this is I'm not going to be an athlete. I

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Speaker 4: know that, so let me focus on other things. And

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Speaker 4: I started seeing guys in my neighborhood that were coming

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Speaker 4: back from the military, recruit training and everything. And when

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Speaker 4: they left, they were just like me, a guy that

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Speaker 4: didn't have purpose and direction and was going through life

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Speaker 4: doing the things that teenagers do, skirting the edge of

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Speaker 4: the law. And when they came back, though they were

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Speaker 4: sinewy muscular, their chest was out, their shoulders were back,

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Speaker 4: their voice was booming. They were confident, and they didn't

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Speaker 4: just walk anymore. They kind of saunters that air of

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Speaker 4: confidence that they had, And I thought to myself, I

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Speaker 4: don't know what they're feeding them in the military, but

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Speaker 4: I want some of that.

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Speaker 2: John, Were you the first one in your family to serve?

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Speaker 4: We didn't have a lot of military presence, but my

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Speaker 4: grandfather was in World War Two. I had two uncles,

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Speaker 4: one uncle that was in the Navy and a Vietnam veteran,

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Speaker 4: and I had another uncle that was a career sailor

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Speaker 4: and retired as a Chief Petty officer. But they didn't

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Speaker 4: have a lot of influence on what I was doing.

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Speaker 4: My older brother Tom joined the Army reserves, and he

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Speaker 4: was kind of one of those guys I saw that

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Speaker 4: came back and were transformed. But seeing guys like him

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Speaker 4: and other guys that had joined the Marine Corps, seeing

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Speaker 4: them come back, that was kind of what influenced me

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Speaker 4: to say, I want to do this.

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Speaker 2: And how did your family react when you came in

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Speaker 2: and told them that you were going to join the military.

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Speaker 4: Oh, they were supportive. They knew my mom, my sister,

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Speaker 4: my older brothers. They knew that living in the west

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Speaker 4: end of Davenport, Iowa, which there's not a lot of

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Speaker 4: opportunities there other than to get in trouble, that I

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Speaker 4: was doing something that was going to better myself, but

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Speaker 4: more importantly, make me a part of something bigger than myself,

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Speaker 4: and then I could reach any untapped potential that I

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Speaker 4: had for success in my life. I got into the Army,

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Speaker 4: and as Forrest Gump would say, I was kind of

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Speaker 4: like one of those round pegs. I just fit right

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Speaker 4: into the Army. And as I got through my recruit training,

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Speaker 4: my basic training at Advanced Individual training, and I went

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Speaker 4: to my first duty station, I thought, this is what

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Speaker 4: I'm going to do for my four year tour, and

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Speaker 4: I'm going to get out. And less than a month

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Speaker 4: after I got there, I met a girl named Sandra Jimenez.

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Speaker 4: On the first of February nineteen eighty three. I'm going

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Speaker 4: to he won in a club with a fake ID,

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Speaker 4: and all of a sudden, I asked this girl to

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Speaker 4: dance and she turned me down. The other Joe that

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Speaker 4: I was with a friend of mine, who was a

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Speaker 4: brand new private, I asked her like three times and

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Speaker 4: she turned me down. So he went and asked her,

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Speaker 4: and so she danced with him, and I was like, no,

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Speaker 4: she you know. So now I mean, I'm pounding beers

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Speaker 4: and whiskeys and everything, and I'm watching her dance with

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Speaker 4: my buddy. And it was on an elevated dance floor,

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Speaker 4: and all of a sudden, he backed up doing his

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Speaker 4: move and he fell off the dance floor. So me,

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Speaker 4: being the true battle buddy that I am, I raced

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Speaker 4: over there, jumped on the stage, took his place, and

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Speaker 4: after that, you know, the rest was history. We started

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Speaker 4: dating my wife and I. We got married six months

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Speaker 4: after I met her. She was pregnant soon after with

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Speaker 4: our first child, and I realized in a hurry that

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Speaker 4: this is what I need to do to take care

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Speaker 4: of my family. It's not individual responsibility. I have a wife,

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Speaker 4: and I have a son on the way, and so

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Speaker 4: I said, I'm going to put my effort into being

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Speaker 4: the best soldier I can be. And little did I

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Speaker 4: know that from then on my career would span almost

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Speaker 4: thirty eight years. And I never thought that I would

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Speaker 4: reach the pinnacle of the enlisted ranks in the Department

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Speaker 4: of Defense. But I just kept pushing forward, and my

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Speaker 4: focus was the better soldier I am, the better leader

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Speaker 4: I am, the better off the men and women in

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Speaker 4: my span of control are going to be, but more importantly,

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Speaker 4: the better I'm going to be able to take care

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Speaker 4: of my family. So that was kind of how I

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Speaker 4: got started and how I pursued my career was always

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Speaker 4: striving to be better the next day than I was

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Speaker 4: that day. And so if I wanted to be an

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Speaker 4: airborne ranger, I went out and did it. I wanted

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Speaker 4: to be a jump master, I went out and did it.

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Speaker 4: I wanted to be a pathfinder, all these things. Wanted

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Speaker 4: to get a college degree. I went and did it.

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Speaker 4: All the things that I thought would make me a

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Speaker 4: better person, better husband, a better father, but more importantly,

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Speaker 4: a better soldier and a better leader. That's what I

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Speaker 4: was focused on.

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Speaker 1: And That's something that so many young people need to

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Speaker 1: hear too, because it's not self focused, that's not self

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Speaker 1: inter self gain, that's greater good all around. I want

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Speaker 1: to do X, y Z to make everything and everyone better,

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Speaker 1: not just myself but everyone around me. That way, we're bigger, stronger, faster,

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Speaker 1: more effective. Absolutely, it's a beautiful thing. No wonder you

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Speaker 1: achieved what you've achieved, but you also did it with conviction.

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Speaker 1: You set a goal and nothing was going to stop you.

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Speaker 2: So you've got this long list of accolades, titles that

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Speaker 2: you've held, even conflicts that you've been involved in. Can

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Speaker 2: you think back to early in your career, was there

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Speaker 2: a tipping point that really kind of changed you or

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Speaker 2: shifted your experience in the military.

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Speaker 4: I had been in the Army almost five years, you know,

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Speaker 4: I had just re enlisted and I got assigned to

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Speaker 4: the eighty second Airborne Division and Fort Bragg, North Carolina.

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Speaker 4: And when I got there, I had been in heavy

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Speaker 4: mechanized units and we were a peacetime military. So we

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Speaker 4: talked all the time about facing the Soviet military and

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Speaker 4: the East Germans, but it was never a reality. It

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Speaker 4: was like a star that you could see, but you

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Speaker 4: knew you were never going to touch And I got

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Speaker 4: to Fort Bragg, North Carolina, and my wife and I

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Speaker 4: were driving on the base just to check things out

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Speaker 4: because we'd never been there before, and we saw this

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Speaker 4: five ton truck with a bunch of grimy paratroopers with

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Speaker 4: camouflage on their face sitting in the back of it.

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Speaker 4: Obviously they had just come from a drop zone conducting

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Speaker 4: a parachute jump. And Sandra even looked at these guys

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Speaker 4: and said, Wow, these guys are serious. And she looks

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Speaker 4: at me, Are you sure that you want to do this?

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Speaker 4: And I said, absolutely, you know. But then I got

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Speaker 4: into the unit and I realized all we talked about

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Speaker 4: was being prepared to go to war. That's all we

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Speaker 4: talked about, even though we were a peacetime military. But

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Speaker 4: we're a rapid deployment force. When we go on Division

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Speaker 4: Ready Force one, you got to be ready within an

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Speaker 4: hour to come in alert marshall, deploy and go to

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Speaker 4: combat in less than eighteen hours from notification. And so

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Speaker 4: even then, being a part of a peacetime military, it

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Speaker 4: refocused me and it caused me to start being the

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Speaker 4: best that I could be because of the level of

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Speaker 4: physical fitness that we required there, and then the level

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Speaker 4: of additional skills that required, like being a jump master.

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Speaker 4: And I still even in nineteen eighty eight, the Sandinista

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Speaker 4: guerrillas from El Salvador invaded Honduras and we got alerted.

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Speaker 4: I was in jump master school at the time, but

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Speaker 4: I didn't go. But we did a jump into Honduras

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Speaker 4: to show support for the Honduran forces. That was still

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Speaker 4: not a combat deployment. It was Operation Golden Pheasant. But

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Speaker 4: that kind of set a light off on me that hey,

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Speaker 4: this could happen anytime. But even still I wasn't completely

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Speaker 4: convinced that we would actually go to combat. Nineteen eighty nine,

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Speaker 4: I'm on Division Ready one Force, but it's the start

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Speaker 4: of half day holiday schedule. So I kissed my wife

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Speaker 4: and my two sons goodbye, and I said, hey, han,

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Speaker 4: i'll be back at noon and we'll go Christmas shopping

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Speaker 4: for the boys. And so I kissed her goodbye, and

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Speaker 4: I got in to the base. And as soon as

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Speaker 4: I got on the base, it was open posts then,

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Speaker 4: but there was an MP all of a sudden at

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Speaker 4: the ends under the base now and they were checking

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Speaker 4: ID cards. They said, hey, what's going on. They said, oh,

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Speaker 4: we're in hand security or whatever. So I got to

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Speaker 4: my headquarters and they said, hey, glad you're here. We

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Speaker 4: were just exercising the alert roster. We've been alerted. And

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Speaker 4: even then me and my teammates thought, are they going

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Speaker 4: to make us do an emergency deployment readiness exercise during

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Speaker 4: half day schedule? What kind of bullshit is that We

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Speaker 4: still weren't convinced that we were being alerted to go

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Speaker 4: to combat. Because if you in Panama at that time,

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Speaker 4: Manuel Noriega, the dictator that was running Panama, had lost

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Speaker 4: the election, but he did not concede. As a matter

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Speaker 4: of fact, his thugs ended up beating up the guy

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Speaker 4: that actually won, and there was a Navy lieutenant who

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Speaker 4: was killed because of the unrest down there. There was

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Speaker 4: a Marine Corps family and service member that were assaulted

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Speaker 4: and everything. And now all of a sudden, Americans had

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Speaker 4: Fort Chairman and elsewhere were at risk, and so we

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Speaker 4: got alerted. We were sent to the personnel holding area.

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Speaker 4: We were trying to figure out what was going on,

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Speaker 4: and there was a freezing rainstorm going on too, and

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Speaker 4: we didn't have any heaters in the tents. We were in.

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Speaker 4: So now not only are we clueless on what's going on,

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Speaker 4: but we're pissed off because we're freezing our asses off

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Speaker 4: and we still think this is some kind of exercise

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Speaker 4: that we're going through and we're not getting our half

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Speaker 4: day schedule. So my platoons are Dave Freeman and I

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Speaker 4: finally said, screw this, let's go find out what's going on.

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Speaker 4: We walked into the brigade headquarters and as we walked in,

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Speaker 4: we saw officers around this table laminating maps of Panama.

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Speaker 4: And we looked each other and said, I guess we

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Speaker 4: know what we're doing now, And all of a sudden

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Speaker 4: we not real there's our answer. And then when we

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Speaker 4: got back to our tent, we were issuing ammunition, live grenades,

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Speaker 4: claim wars, all of that stuff, and all of a

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Speaker 4: sudden we knew this was real. We were packing all

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Speaker 4: of our ammunition in our combat gear, and the chaplain

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Speaker 4: walks into the tent. Hey, look, no pressure, but if

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Speaker 4: anybody wants to say a prayer, come on over here.

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Speaker 1: The entire tent went up with the Yeah it's funny

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Speaker 1: how that works, right, Yeah, it's funny. How if you

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Speaker 1: have the guys that are like nah, I'm not going

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Speaker 1: to go to chapel. I'm too hungover or I'm still drunk.

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Speaker 1: And then you get the call and it's like, hey,

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Speaker 1: oh yeah, we're going. Hey yeah, I'll make it. I'm

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Speaker 1: gonna go. You guys send me see it. I'll be there.

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Speaker 4: Well, like they say, the phrase is there's no atheist

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Speaker 4: in foxholes. So that kind of changed. And so think

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Speaker 4: of this. There were no cell phones back then. They

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Speaker 4: cut the phone lines, so I didn't have the ability

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Speaker 4: to call my wife and let her know what was

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Speaker 4: going on. Oh man, And I just said, well, sooner

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Speaker 4: or later, she's going to figure out that I'm not

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Speaker 4: coming home and then I'm going to combat. Next thing,

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Speaker 4: you know, we loaded up on those on that frozen

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Speaker 4: tarmac at Pope air Force Base and we took off

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Speaker 4: and we're on our way to combat, you know. And

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Speaker 4: at one am we started parachuting in to Rio's airport.

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Speaker 4: The Rangers were jumping on the military airfield, Document Airfield.

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Speaker 4: We were jumping on the military airport. And little did

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Speaker 4: I know that my wife found out I wasn't coming

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Speaker 4: home by watching the news that night and seeing that

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Speaker 4: American forces were conducting a combat parachute assault into Panama

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Speaker 4: to toppol Noriega and to reinstate or in state the

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Speaker 4: rightful government and to protect American lives and innocent Panamanians.

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Speaker 4: And that's how my combat started. And for the next

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Speaker 4: week we secured all of our assault objectives, we expanded

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Speaker 4: our lodgment area out, and we started taking down targets.

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Speaker 4: But an hour into the first patrol I went in,

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Speaker 4: we lost our first American specialist in Alexandro Manrique Lozano

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Speaker 4: from second Italian five or fourth Parisheet Infantry Regiment. I'm

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Speaker 4: thinking to myself at that time, twenty four hours before this,

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Speaker 4: this young man was thinking about going home with his

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Speaker 4: family or spending time with his family over the holidays.

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Speaker 4: Twenty four hours later he gave his life in defense

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Speaker 4: of our country. And that told me that we've got

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Speaker 4: to dig in, We've got to get through this, and

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Speaker 4: we can't allow you know that we've lost an American

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Speaker 4: to kind of drag us down, and so we've re

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Speaker 4: We continued to focus and get after the enemy and everything,

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Speaker 4: and by the Christmas Eve, we had lost four paratroopers,

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Speaker 4: two on an assault on what I call Tinaheatus Hill,

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Speaker 4: which was this huge hill that we were taking down

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Speaker 4: the lt Grays, which were an elite force of Panamanians.

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Speaker 4: But at about Christmas Eve, the fighting started dying down

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Speaker 4: and I found myself pulling security around the Papal Nuncia,

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Speaker 4: the religious chapel that was in the heart of the

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Speaker 4: town where Noriega had holed up in trying to get

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Speaker 4: religious protection from being captured by us. And so as

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Speaker 4: I pulled perimeter security out there with my team on

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Speaker 4: our shared and armored reconnaissance vehicle, there was a Marriott

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Speaker 4: hotel across the street, and so I told my guys,

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Speaker 4: I said, hey, I'm going to go check it out

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Speaker 4: and see if there's any payphones in there, and we'll

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Speaker 4: see if we can contact our families. So I grabbed

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Speaker 4: one of my guys and we went over there, and

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Speaker 4: sure as shit, there were some phones in there. So

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Speaker 4: I picked up the phone and called collect to Sandra,

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Speaker 4: and that was the first conversation I had with her

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Speaker 4: since I had left, and it was a very emotional conversation.

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Speaker 4: I mean, the hair is rising up on my arms now.

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Speaker 4: It was the first time one I've had my baptism

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Speaker 4: by fire ending up in two point ambushes and stuff

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Speaker 4: like that. I've seen Americans killed, We've killed enemy fighters.

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Speaker 4: But now I'm having a conversation with my wife and

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Speaker 4: our children. And within that three minute call there was

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Speaker 4: a bit of solace in peace. But then after that call,

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Speaker 4: I had to go right back out into the combat zone.

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Speaker 4: But that there, Ashley, was the turning point that told

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Speaker 4: me that living this military life and this warrior ethos life,

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Speaker 4: regardless of what service you're into, what you do, that

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Speaker 4: on any given day, your life could change in a heartbeat,

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Speaker 4: and all of a sudden you could find yourself against

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Speaker 4: an armed enemy and combat as brutal and unforgiving as

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Speaker 4: it is. Unfortunately, good men and women perish in battle,

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Speaker 4: and we have to be best prepared to deal with

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Speaker 4: that brutality and unforgiveness in combat. And I told myself

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Speaker 4: as a leader, I'm going to make sure the men

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Speaker 4: and women in my charge are going to be always ready,

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Speaker 4: regardless of how long I stay in the military. That

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Speaker 4: was the point that changed me to now being always

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Speaker 4: wired for combat, even though we were still a peacetime military.

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Speaker 4: But then seven months later, Saddam Hussein invades Iraq and

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Speaker 4: I find myself back in a combat zone. But this time,

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Speaker 4: I think mentally and emotionally, myself and all of the

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Speaker 4: paratroopers I were with in my company, we were prepared

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Speaker 4: for it because we had already experienced combat. That's what

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Speaker 4: changed me into being somebody that was always going to

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Speaker 4: be folkscus on being best prepared for the conditions we

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Speaker 4: could face on the worst day of our life in combat.

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Speaker 1: That's one of the blessings in the military. I mean,

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Speaker 1: there's no better way than just to get in and

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Speaker 1: do it. That's the best way to understand and prepare

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Speaker 1: for the next thing, whatever that is. And that's regardless

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Speaker 1: of Army, Marines, Air Force, Navy, coast Guard. That's the

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Speaker 1: best way to know. When you talked about that with

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Speaker 1: your wife, that's crazy to think about because we didn't

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Speaker 1: have the modern conveniences that we have today to be hey, haun,

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna make it, I'm gonna be gone. Don't

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Speaker 1: know what I'm gonna get back. You didn't have any

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Speaker 1: of that. To not be able to have that effective

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Speaker 1: communication with your loved ones before you go employ what

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Speaker 1: you've trained day in and day out to do. That

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Speaker 1: brings in a whole different element that I've never really

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Speaker 1: thought about.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and we had what we called family support groups

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Speaker 4: back then, but they were I mean they were about

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Speaker 4: doing bake sales and stuff like that and trying to

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Speaker 4: build morale, never with the thought that we might actually

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Speaker 4: go to combat. And so when I got back and

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Speaker 4: I was talking to my wife, but also other military spouses,

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Speaker 4: they talked about the first meeting the spouses had with

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Speaker 4: the command, the rear detachment command, and they talked about, hey,

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Speaker 4: your husbands were in combat. They parachuted into combat on

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Speaker 4: the evening of the twentieth of December, and they will

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Speaker 4: stay there and continue to fight until you know, Noriega

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Speaker 4: capitulates and Panamanian forces surrender. And in one of the

377
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Speaker 4: spouses even asked, so there's potential that they could get killed.

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Speaker 4: I mean it was an innocent enough question, but as

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Speaker 4: a peacetime military with peacetime families, you still hadn't put

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Speaker 4: it together that, as you just described, Jake, the level

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Speaker 4: of brutality, the violence of action equates to people get killed.

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Speaker 4: And so this in it is enough question, and the commander,

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Speaker 4: the redetachment commander, said yes, some may not come back,

384
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Speaker 4: and I was so happy to hear from other spouses

385
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Speaker 4: on how my wife was deemed as one of the

386
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Speaker 4: strong ones. Now, Sandra grew up as a first generation

387
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Speaker 4: Mexican American. Her dad was from Chihuahua, Mexico, her mom

388
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Speaker 4: was from southern Texas. They had nineteen kids, wow, nineteen

389
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Speaker 4: kids in twenty three years. She grew up poor, but

390
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Speaker 4: she had to be resilient through her childhood and everything

391
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Speaker 4: and as she grew up. So I think this kind

392
00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 4: of upbringing prepared her. And she used to say this

393
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Speaker 4: all the time, and through my multiple combat tours, I've

394
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Speaker 4: got three sons I have to worry about, and I

395
00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:49,200
Speaker 4: can't sit around and talk gloom and doom or you know,

396
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:51,399
Speaker 4: feel sorry for myself. I've got to be here for

397
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Speaker 4: my kids. And so that's nobody prepared her for that

398
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Speaker 4: other than her upbringing. But that was the focus she had,

399
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Speaker 4: and in it she knew I was in combat. She said,

400
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Speaker 4: I can't control what's going to happen with my husband,

401
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Speaker 4: but I can control what's going on with my kids.

402
00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:11,680
Speaker 4: I can keep them focused, I can keep them energized

403
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Speaker 4: with school. And then when they had these meetings and

404
00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:18,879
Speaker 4: we started talking about or the family started talking with

405
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Speaker 4: the rear detachment about the realities of combat. I would

406
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Speaker 4: say she was stoic to it because of her upbringing,

407
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Speaker 4: and it was I was so proud that when I

408
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Speaker 4: got back when people would come and compliment me on

409
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Speaker 4: my wife and how strong she was, and I said,

410
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Speaker 4: that's my Sandra. That's as I call her, my little windmill.

411
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Speaker 4: She has just always been that way through our entire

412
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Speaker 4: thirty nine year marriage.

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Speaker 1: That's awesome.

414
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Speaker 2: Yeah, congratulations on that, And what has that done to

415
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:49,040
Speaker 2: lend to your success?

416
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Speaker 4: As a matter of fact, I'm writing a book now

417
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Speaker 4: and it's called Surrenderer Die, Reflections of a Combat Leader,

418
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Speaker 4: and one of the chapters in there is going to

419
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Speaker 4: be what I call all give our Love to Sandra.

420
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Speaker 4: So I think when you are someone that's been in

421
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Speaker 4: the military for decades and throughout your entire career, you've

422
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Speaker 4: had a spouse with you, like I've had Sandra with

423
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Speaker 4: me through this whole ride, all of a sudden, your

424
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 4: spouse becomes synonymous with you. And so anytime somebody would

425
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Speaker 4: reach out to say hello to me, somebody I served

426
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Speaker 4: with in the eighties the nineties, two thousands senior officials

427
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Speaker 4: in the Defense Department or the administration or in Congress.

428
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Speaker 4: Every time they would say Hey, how's it going, or

429
00:22:37,040 --> 00:22:39,359
Speaker 4: how's it going, John, they would always say, give our

430
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Speaker 4: love to Sandra. And so I'm going to talk about

431
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Speaker 4: the importance of a military spouse to the success of

432
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Speaker 4: someone that lives in this warrior class. And if Jake,

433
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 4: you kind of talked about this a little earlier, that

434
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:57,879
Speaker 4: if you don't have that outlet when you leave you know,

435
00:22:57,960 --> 00:23:00,480
Speaker 4: whether you're training or whether you're in cock, if you

436
00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:03,359
Speaker 4: don't have that outlet when you come back, known as

437
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:07,399
Speaker 4: family and especially a significant other, your wife or your

438
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:11,159
Speaker 4: husband or whatever, I mean, it's tough to deal with that.

439
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:18,440
Speaker 4: And I would have never without Sandra's support, without her direction,

440
00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:22,320
Speaker 4: without her advice, I would have never reached the levels

441
00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,399
Speaker 4: of service that I reached. I had to have that person,

442
00:23:26,480 --> 00:23:28,920
Speaker 4: and she's always been that person. Now, don't get me wrong.

443
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:32,000
Speaker 4: Our marriage hasn't always been beer and skittles, Okay, I

444
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:37,120
Speaker 4: mean she's had to written really yeah, I mean she's

445
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:40,280
Speaker 4: had to rip my ass sometimes, but it was because

446
00:23:40,320 --> 00:23:42,760
Speaker 4: I needed it. And then I would even tell you this.

447
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:46,600
Speaker 4: She was the one that gave me an ultimatum about

448
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,679
Speaker 4: a year before I was retiring that said, I need

449
00:23:48,840 --> 00:23:51,480
Speaker 4: you need to go talk to somebody about all this

450
00:23:51,640 --> 00:23:54,520
Speaker 4: anger you have, or I'm going to have to reconsider

451
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,600
Speaker 4: the direction we're going. As a married couple, think of this.

452
00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 4: We had been married well over thirty five years. She

453
00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:02,879
Speaker 4: was telling me there was something wrong with me. She

454
00:24:03,080 --> 00:24:04,640
Speaker 4: was telling me there was something wrong with me. When

455
00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,040
Speaker 4: I came back from just causing desert storm, I just

456
00:24:07,160 --> 00:24:09,840
Speaker 4: wasn't listening. And I thought to myself. In in the

457
00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:14,040
Speaker 4: eighties and nineties, PTSD and traumatic brain injury weren't even

458
00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:16,600
Speaker 4: things that were talked about. But when she told me that,

459
00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 4: I went to see a therapist just to appease her.

460
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:23,040
Speaker 4: But when I got in, when I got in there though,

461
00:24:23,760 --> 00:24:25,880
Speaker 4: it felt like my therapist at the time her name

462
00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:28,560
Speaker 4: was Gina, that she was ripping my skull open and

463
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:31,639
Speaker 4: reading my brain. She knew exactly what was going on

464
00:24:31,800 --> 00:24:35,240
Speaker 4: with me and everything, and so she diagnosed me with PTSD.

465
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:39,920
Speaker 4: And think of this now, the stigmas associated with mental

466
00:24:40,000 --> 00:24:42,879
Speaker 4: health and Jake, you'll appreciate that my two bosses at

467
00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:45,879
Speaker 4: the time I was diagnosed to PTSD, the chairman was

468
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:49,920
Speaker 4: fighting Joe Dunford Marine and the second trom.

469
00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:52,120
Speaker 1: I've had the privilege of shaking his hand a couple

470
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:52,520
Speaker 1: of times.

471
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 4: Hey, and the Secretary of Defense the other you know

472
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:57,640
Speaker 4: as the SAAC, you advised both the chairman and the Sectiff.

473
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 4: The sect deaf was a guy named Jim madd Matis

474
00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:05,840
Speaker 4: arguably the two hardest combat leaders in the history of

475
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:08,399
Speaker 4: our force. And I had to lead delar Renzo Clinic

476
00:25:08,480 --> 00:25:10,800
Speaker 4: in the Pentagon, and I had to walk up there

477
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,359
Speaker 4: and tell those two gentlemen that I was in therapy

478
00:25:13,480 --> 00:25:17,240
Speaker 4: for PTSD. There was a dude I have and Ashley,

479
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:19,920
Speaker 4: I have walked a lot of miles in my life

480
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,480
Speaker 4: up the mountains of the Hindu Christian Afghanistan. The longest

481
00:25:23,560 --> 00:25:26,359
Speaker 4: walk I ever had was leaving that clinic and going

482
00:25:26,440 --> 00:25:29,640
Speaker 4: to this Chairman's office and the Secretary of Defense's office

483
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:32,680
Speaker 4: and telling them I was in therapy for PTSD. And

484
00:25:32,760 --> 00:25:36,320
Speaker 4: you know what Mattis said to me. He said, Okay, good,

485
00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:38,119
Speaker 4: what are you going back to Yemen to tell me

486
00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:40,920
Speaker 4: what's going on with al Kaeda in the Arabian Peninsula?

487
00:25:41,240 --> 00:25:43,960
Speaker 4: And then Dunford was kind of like, okay, good, pack

488
00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:45,920
Speaker 4: your shit. We're going to go to Afghanistan and Iraq

489
00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:48,720
Speaker 4: to visit the troops. It was a non issue to them.

490
00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 4: I had given myself this stigma, but to them it

491
00:25:52,320 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 4: was a non issue. They were like, Okay, good, that's

492
00:25:54,720 --> 00:25:56,400
Speaker 4: good for you. It's going to make you a better leader.

493
00:25:56,600 --> 00:25:59,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's and the listeners probably didn't hear it, but

494
00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:04,440
Speaker 1: started laughing so hard. I started crying, like it was.

495
00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:10,720
Speaker 1: Think about this. Branches are relevant, right, those are the

496
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:18,439
Speaker 1: two names, I would say, arguably, since we were attacked

497
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 1: in two thousand and one, those are the two names

498
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:26,880
Speaker 1: you would not want, Like you would rather cut off

499
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:30,200
Speaker 1: a finger than have to go have those conversations with

500
00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:33,480
Speaker 1: those two. And you had both of them. Yes, yeah,

501
00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:36,080
Speaker 1: I mean if that's not that you don't have to

502
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:38,720
Speaker 1: eat a piece of humble pie. You have to inhale

503
00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 1: the factory.

504
00:26:40,320 --> 00:26:43,359
Speaker 4: Spot on brother, and that lesson for me. And I'm

505
00:26:43,400 --> 00:26:45,080
Speaker 4: going to talk about this in my book when it

506
00:26:45,160 --> 00:26:48,240
Speaker 4: comes to the Invisible Wounds of War. Told me that

507
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:53,080
Speaker 4: we have to eliminate this stigma about seeking hell. And

508
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:56,680
Speaker 4: I don't care how long you served or what you've done,

509
00:26:57,480 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 4: your military service will always be a part of Okay,

510
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:05,000
Speaker 4: And there's some things in there that are going to

511
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:08,720
Speaker 4: be constants, and especially if you served in combat, you

512
00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:11,879
Speaker 4: just don't flush that stuff under the table. I had

513
00:27:11,880 --> 00:27:15,439
Speaker 4: a conversation with a staffer in Washington, DC on one

514
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:18,800
Speaker 4: of the trips. I was there right after Afghanistan, the

515
00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:22,680
Speaker 4: abrupt withdrawal from Afghanistan, and I was talking to this

516
00:27:22,840 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 4: person about how I was very critical of the strategy

517
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:31,600
Speaker 4: that we used, okay, and the undue stress and risk

518
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:34,080
Speaker 4: we put on the men and women that had to

519
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 4: deal with getting all the US citizens and SIV people

520
00:27:39,880 --> 00:27:45,600
Speaker 4: and clearing out of Cowbo Airport. And I said, anybody

521
00:27:45,680 --> 00:27:49,640
Speaker 4: that knows anything about Afghanistan, you can't say in two

522
00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:52,919
Speaker 4: weeks we are going to move the troops out first,

523
00:27:53,720 --> 00:27:55,080
Speaker 4: and then we're going to try and get all the

524
00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:57,879
Speaker 4: non combatants out and everything, and then try to get

525
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,480
Speaker 4: the equipment out. We kind of did that ass backwards

526
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 4: when we should have took the equipment out.

527
00:28:02,480 --> 00:28:05,359
Speaker 1: Or excuse me, you assistant, They wouldn't Yeah, we should have.

528
00:28:05,600 --> 00:28:10,240
Speaker 4: Yeah. So this person who has no military experience, and

529
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:13,120
Speaker 4: as the staffer says, well, the commander in chief made

530
00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 4: a decision. You the veteran population and the serviceman need

531
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,639
Speaker 4: to get over. I said, no disrespect, but you have

532
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:25,560
Speaker 4: no problem saying that, Okay, you are desensitized to it

533
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:28,399
Speaker 4: because you have no skin in the game. Right, you

534
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:31,040
Speaker 4: have never faced a business end of an enemy rifle

535
00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,880
Speaker 4: or seen a buddy on your left or right get

536
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:37,400
Speaker 4: vaporized by an improvised explosive device, and they went from

537
00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 4: some precious, beautiful human into a pile of flesh, hair

538
00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:45,920
Speaker 4: and camouflage material. I said, you have no skin in

539
00:28:45,960 --> 00:28:47,640
Speaker 4: the game, So it's easy for you to say that,

540
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:51,080
Speaker 4: I said, but we who have served are never going

541
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:54,400
Speaker 4: to forget when we lose men and women, and we're

542
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 4: certainly not going to just throw away twenty years of

543
00:28:58,280 --> 00:29:01,440
Speaker 4: fighting in Afghanistan and say, okay, what's next. All right,

544
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 4: It doesn't work that way. And if we continue to

545
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:08,400
Speaker 4: say veterans got to get over this when they're dealing

546
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:13,640
Speaker 4: with the mental and emotional struggles of post combat, you know,

547
00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 4: in post traumatic stress, then we are adding to the problems.

548
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:20,080
Speaker 4: We are not trying to solve it.

549
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:25,520
Speaker 1: You know what. Just like you said, brother, this stigma

550
00:29:26,400 --> 00:29:30,000
Speaker 1: is killing us at the cyclic rate, yeah, and nightly.

551
00:29:30,280 --> 00:29:32,600
Speaker 1: And not just our warrior class either, not just our

552
00:29:32,640 --> 00:29:35,840
Speaker 1: brothers and sisters who've done the cloth of the nation.

553
00:29:36,440 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 1: This is a human problem around the world, and it's

554
00:29:41,280 --> 00:29:44,800
Speaker 1: become evident. It's very evident since the global pandemic, since

555
00:29:44,800 --> 00:29:48,160
Speaker 1: the world shutdown, and how everything in the middle and

556
00:29:48,240 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 1: emotional wellness realm has skyrocketed. Client intakes have gone through

557
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:55,920
Speaker 1: the roof. I mean, you're getting burnout rates at the

558
00:29:56,000 --> 00:29:59,800
Speaker 1: cyclic rate with therapists and psychologists because it's like the

559
00:30:00,280 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 1: gates of open. It's a supply and demand issue now.

560
00:30:03,600 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 1: And so the fact that you started it because of

561
00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 1: an ultimatum by Sandra, which I can't wait to meet her,

562
00:30:12,120 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 1: because I'm just going to give her a big, huge

563
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:18,680
Speaker 1: giant hug because I get it. And I also understand

564
00:30:18,720 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 1: how iron sharpens iron absolutely, and I also understand how

565
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:27,800
Speaker 1: when we come home, it's not just us they're affected. Rather,

566
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,000
Speaker 1: you know, you're like me and you spend eighteen months

567
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:32,720
Speaker 1: in the hospital and you're trying to figure out what

568
00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 1: your new normal is, which is not normal at all.

569
00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,960
Speaker 1: We affect our entire family. You have to have a Sandra.

570
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:43,360
Speaker 1: If you don't, it doesn't work. And I know that

571
00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:46,440
Speaker 1: you had soldiers that it fell by the wayside because

572
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:48,320
Speaker 1: they didn't have a Sandra. They may have had a

573
00:30:48,480 --> 00:30:52,239
Speaker 1: spouse but they didn't have someone as strong and it's

574
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:56,240
Speaker 1: cemented and as rooted in their own conviction as you did.

575
00:30:56,960 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 4: That's the huge point there is that some military spouses

576
00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:05,800
Speaker 4: don't fully understand the power of their role. I'm not

577
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:09,959
Speaker 4: trying to pass judgment on any military spouse or criticize them,

578
00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:14,160
Speaker 4: but every time I deployed somewhere, Sandra stayed in our house.

579
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,240
Speaker 4: When I went to combat in Iraq or Afghanistan. You know,

580
00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:21,840
Speaker 4: she didn't go home to family. She said, I'm not

581
00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:24,000
Speaker 4: going to go stay in somebody else's house. This is

582
00:31:24,120 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 4: my house and I have to give normalcy to my children.

583
00:31:27,480 --> 00:31:30,040
Speaker 4: That's just the way she was when I was a

584
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 4: Striker Brigade Sir Major during the surge in Iraq in

585
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:37,160
Speaker 4: seven and eight, when we put five army brigades and

586
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 4: two more Marine brigades in Iraq. You probably remember that

587
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:44,160
Speaker 4: the first eight days of combat, my commander and I

588
00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:48,080
Speaker 4: had visited the morgue seven times to identify the remains

589
00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 4: of some of our guys that had been killed in action.

590
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,960
Speaker 4: At the same time as we are knee deep in

591
00:31:55,120 --> 00:31:59,600
Speaker 4: this combat back home, every time we have somebody killed

592
00:31:59,600 --> 00:32:02,320
Speaker 4: and after you official notification is out I would call

593
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,040
Speaker 4: her and she would go to the memorial service. We

594
00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 4: lost fifty four over that fifteen month tour and had

595
00:32:08,480 --> 00:32:12,120
Speaker 4: over five hundred severely wounded. She went to every memorial service,

596
00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:15,880
Speaker 4: every funeral. She went to visit the wounded along with

597
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 4: me in San Antonio and in Walter Reid. But here

598
00:32:19,840 --> 00:32:22,120
Speaker 4: the eighth day, I've been in combat eight days now

599
00:32:23,240 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 4: and the worst nightmare of any military family's life. The

600
00:32:27,600 --> 00:32:31,560
Speaker 4: two sedans that come driving down your neighborhood full of

601
00:32:31,640 --> 00:32:35,760
Speaker 4: guys in their service Alpha uniform and one guy holding

602
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:36,520
Speaker 4: the Bible.

603
00:32:36,280 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 1: At chaplain's for the listeners. That's the dress uniform.

604
00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 4: Yeah, those two sedans are the Casualtine Notification team. And

605
00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:47,480
Speaker 4: they happened to pull up in front of our house,

606
00:32:47,520 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 4: and Sandra was on the front porch reading a book,

607
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:53,880
Speaker 4: and as they got out, all of a sudden, she

608
00:32:54,120 --> 00:32:56,800
Speaker 4: was starting to get paranoid. Here she went in and

609
00:32:56,880 --> 00:32:59,520
Speaker 4: told the kids, they go to your rooms, all right,

610
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:04,200
Speaker 4: And she came back out and they were going next door.

611
00:33:05,800 --> 00:33:08,280
Speaker 4: And then as they went in, all of a sudden,

612
00:33:08,360 --> 00:33:12,520
Speaker 4: she heard the next door neighbor's wife start wailing. So

613
00:33:12,680 --> 00:33:15,720
Speaker 4: my next door neighbor green Beret Sergeant Major Brad Connor

614
00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:19,240
Speaker 4: had been killed in action. So now Sandra went from

615
00:33:19,280 --> 00:33:21,760
Speaker 4: someone that thought it was I that got killed in

616
00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:27,200
Speaker 4: action to now having to, you know, provide support and

617
00:33:27,320 --> 00:33:30,760
Speaker 4: solace to our next door neighbor who just lost her husband,

618
00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:34,760
Speaker 4: and to their children and everything. That's why a military

619
00:33:34,880 --> 00:33:40,000
Speaker 4: spouse that is engaged and understands is so important. But

620
00:33:40,120 --> 00:33:43,880
Speaker 4: there are service members out there that don't want their

621
00:33:43,920 --> 00:33:46,680
Speaker 4: spouses involved. And I will tell you I had one

622
00:33:46,760 --> 00:33:51,160
Speaker 4: guy in my brigade during that tour, a great sergeant

623
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:53,480
Speaker 4: first class, a great non commission aficer. He was a

624
00:33:53,520 --> 00:33:57,680
Speaker 4: platoon sergeant. He didn't want his wife to worry, so

625
00:33:57,840 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 4: he told her, oh, I don't out of the wire. Ever,

626
00:34:01,600 --> 00:34:03,400
Speaker 4: even though every day he was out in the wire

627
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:06,920
Speaker 4: and he was fighting al Qaeda every day. In his

628
00:34:07,160 --> 00:34:09,480
Speaker 4: last day as a platoon sergeant, when we were going

629
00:34:09,520 --> 00:34:11,160
Speaker 4: to pull him out of that platoon and put him

630
00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:13,560
Speaker 4: into a staff role where he wouldn't go out of

631
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:16,760
Speaker 4: the wire, his vehicle was hit by an improvised explosive

632
00:34:16,800 --> 00:34:19,840
Speaker 4: device and he was killed in action. So when the

633
00:34:19,920 --> 00:34:23,400
Speaker 4: casually notification team let this person know, or let his

634
00:34:23,520 --> 00:34:26,320
Speaker 4: spouse know, she said, how can this happen. My husband

635
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:30,560
Speaker 4: never went out alive. We have to explain the realities

636
00:34:31,080 --> 00:34:34,160
Speaker 4: of what we're doing. And if we think that we

637
00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 4: are protecting our loved ones by not sharing in the

638
00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:41,840
Speaker 4: harsh realities of combat, stuff like this can happen. And

639
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:44,839
Speaker 4: think it's already bad enough that her husband was killed

640
00:34:44,880 --> 00:34:47,359
Speaker 4: in action and that their father was killed in action,

641
00:34:48,000 --> 00:34:51,239
Speaker 4: but it was just amplified when they were under the

642
00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:53,040
Speaker 4: impression that he was just going to go over there

643
00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 4: for fifteen months, sit in a staff role and do

644
00:34:56,320 --> 00:34:59,879
Speaker 4: nothing and come home in fifteen months. It even amplified

645
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 4: the pain and the anguish. And so I think in

646
00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:06,600
Speaker 4: our military couples there has to be these frank conversations

647
00:35:06,640 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 4: at all time.

648
00:35:07,400 --> 00:35:11,520
Speaker 1: You're exactly right, bro, it's so important with Ash and

649
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:15,360
Speaker 1: I and our boys. It's Honesty's the best policy, just period,

650
00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:19,040
Speaker 1: and that needs to be across the board because of

651
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:21,719
Speaker 1: the simple fact, regardless of how it may make you

652
00:35:21,880 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 1: look or not look, it's all about preparedness. Because of

653
00:35:26,160 --> 00:35:29,400
Speaker 1: the fact that Sergeant first class said that to his wife.

654
00:35:29,920 --> 00:35:34,200
Speaker 1: Now his widow and children have a whole different layer

655
00:35:34,360 --> 00:35:36,719
Speaker 1: of healing they're going to have to go through that.

656
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:41,000
Speaker 1: Otherwise could have been mitigated just by being straight up.

657
00:35:41,280 --> 00:35:43,719
Speaker 1: And that is why I think it is so important

658
00:35:43,800 --> 00:35:45,920
Speaker 1: that That's why I always say there's a significant difference

659
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:52,200
Speaker 1: between communication and effective communication. Anyone can communicate effectively. Communicating

660
00:35:52,520 --> 00:35:57,840
Speaker 1: is an art, but it takes honesty and vulnerability. You

661
00:35:58,000 --> 00:36:02,080
Speaker 1: cannot have it without those two things. And so I'm

662
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:04,360
Speaker 1: grateful for Santa. I cannot wait to give her a

663
00:36:04,480 --> 00:36:07,320
Speaker 1: hug man like because I get it. I get it,

664
00:36:07,760 --> 00:36:11,960
Speaker 1: and I know the true backbone. Yeah, and I know

665
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:14,200
Speaker 1: why we're the best in the world. And there is

666
00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:18,239
Speaker 1: a lot of women and some men that have never

667
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:21,800
Speaker 1: put on the cloth of this nation, but are a

668
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:24,440
Speaker 1: significant reason why we're the best in the world and

669
00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:25,600
Speaker 1: we're still a free country.

670
00:36:25,840 --> 00:36:29,600
Speaker 4: I think of Sandra and then her counterpart, my commander's wife,

671
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:35,600
Speaker 4: Stacy fifty four memorial services and funerals. She I mean,

672
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:39,160
Speaker 4: Sandra joined me in trips to the hospitals where here

673
00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:43,160
Speaker 4: are soldiers that are bilateral amputees or burn victims over

674
00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:46,359
Speaker 4: eighty percent of their body, or that are missing an

675
00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:50,120
Speaker 4: eye or something like that. And that has an impact

676
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:53,520
Speaker 4: on a military spouse. And so when we talk about

677
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:57,400
Speaker 4: these resiliency programs for our service members. It has to

678
00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 4: be there for our military spouses as well.

679
00:37:00,080 --> 00:37:01,839
Speaker 3: Hundred absolutely.

680
00:37:02,560 --> 00:37:04,799
Speaker 1: How do you feel like therapy has impacted your life?

681
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:07,840
Speaker 4: It was the best thing that ever happened to me,

682
00:37:08,840 --> 00:37:11,320
Speaker 4: all of a sudden, all the anger I had, and

683
00:37:11,440 --> 00:37:14,600
Speaker 4: I didn't need. You know, there are some that require

684
00:37:15,040 --> 00:37:19,360
Speaker 4: additional stuff, like service animals or medication or some I

685
00:37:19,680 --> 00:37:23,400
Speaker 4: just again fit like one of these round pegs. Just

686
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 4: talking to somebody for an hour once a week. It

687
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:31,800
Speaker 4: made me calmer. My hyper vigilance was beginning to get reduced.

688
00:37:32,440 --> 00:37:35,200
Speaker 4: And I mean because and you probably had to deal

689
00:37:35,239 --> 00:37:37,720
Speaker 4: with this with Jake. You know, going to the grocery

690
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:43,359
Speaker 4: store can be like a deliberate combat operation. One way. Yes,

691
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:45,640
Speaker 4: it's one way in and one way out there.

692
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,360
Speaker 1: And there's people there, Yeah, there's there's people there that

693
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:56,400
Speaker 1: you Yes, everything's over analyzed, everything is overthought. Everything is exhausting.

694
00:37:56,800 --> 00:38:02,600
Speaker 1: You're right, Anything simple as going to a corner store

695
00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:06,040
Speaker 1: is exhausting. It's like, this is not the way to live.

696
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:10,719
Speaker 1: And the fact that Sandra gave you this ultimatum. We

697
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:16,040
Speaker 1: have to protect the most important weapon will ever possess,

698
00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 1: and that's the noodle float in six inches in between

699
00:38:19,200 --> 00:38:23,960
Speaker 1: our ears absolutely, because there's no prosthetic for that. Yeah,

700
00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:26,920
Speaker 1: the one we got. We have to be able to

701
00:38:27,200 --> 00:38:30,680
Speaker 1: talk to someone who's an unbiased third party that can

702
00:38:31,320 --> 00:38:34,200
Speaker 1: just help us make our souls lighter. That's it. There's

703
00:38:34,239 --> 00:38:37,400
Speaker 1: no judgment there. It's not a sign of weakness. It's

704
00:38:37,840 --> 00:38:41,839
Speaker 1: exactly the opposite, which I think now, especially after having

705
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:45,440
Speaker 1: done it, you would completely agree with. It is a

706
00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:49,319
Speaker 1: sign of strength and courage. And it doesn't only make

707
00:38:49,360 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 1: you a better soldier, leader, husband, father, it makes you

708
00:38:55,239 --> 00:38:59,279
Speaker 1: a better human being that by default gives you the

709
00:38:59,400 --> 00:39:02,040
Speaker 1: ability to help other people.

710
00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:08,640
Speaker 4: Think of this. Think of our most elite special operations forces.

711
00:39:09,280 --> 00:39:11,480
Speaker 4: You know, the Sealed Team six is, the Deltas, the

712
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:15,560
Speaker 4: Mars Socks and all them. They have embedded behavioral health

713
00:39:15,640 --> 00:39:19,360
Speaker 4: specialists as part of their human performance teams. Why do

714
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,880
Speaker 4: our most elite special operation forces have those people? Because

715
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:27,759
Speaker 4: they realize that mental and emotional challenges and PTSD and

716
00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:31,880
Speaker 4: things like that are significant, and even our most elite

717
00:39:32,239 --> 00:39:37,160
Speaker 4: special operators are not immune to the invisible wounds of war.

718
00:39:37,480 --> 00:39:42,160
Speaker 1: That's right. We always forget we have all these titles,

719
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:46,080
Speaker 1: especially in the military, as you know, just spade of spade,

720
00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:49,920
Speaker 1: you got pretty up there right, You still had a

721
00:39:50,160 --> 00:39:54,640
Speaker 1: ton of bosses. Yes, it's like they're never ending. The military,

722
00:39:54,719 --> 00:39:59,520
Speaker 1: it's insane. The fact that you were able to get

723
00:39:59,560 --> 00:40:05,279
Speaker 1: to that and be able to take that step has

724
00:40:05,400 --> 00:40:08,280
Speaker 1: been a force multiplier for the greater good in everything

725
00:40:08,360 --> 00:40:11,000
Speaker 1: around you. And not to say you didn't wake up

726
00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:13,279
Speaker 1: and have bad days. You're human. But that's the thing

727
00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:18,160
Speaker 1: that people forget, is that we're not robots. Ye're not robots.

728
00:40:18,239 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 1: And even those brothers serve shoulder or shoulder, it's like

729
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:27,000
Speaker 1: we're we can't forget the most important God given title

730
00:40:27,120 --> 00:40:28,280
Speaker 1: first human.

731
00:40:28,920 --> 00:40:32,320
Speaker 4: Absolutely, I realized having you know, now I'm in a

732
00:40:32,400 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 4: regular therapy session and life has all of a sudden

733
00:40:36,080 --> 00:40:38,759
Speaker 4: turned for me. And now the anger is starting to

734
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,600
Speaker 4: go away, but the reflections are coming in. And I

735
00:40:41,680 --> 00:40:45,840
Speaker 4: knew that I raised three sons, you know, and I

736
00:40:46,040 --> 00:40:49,480
Speaker 4: was pretty strict with their upbringing. I wasn't abusive, but

737
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,640
Speaker 4: you know, sometimes I used harsh language and sometimes I

738
00:40:52,719 --> 00:40:55,600
Speaker 4: did some things. So I knew that to get closure

739
00:40:56,160 --> 00:40:58,920
Speaker 4: with what I was doing, I need to let my

740
00:40:59,000 --> 00:41:01,400
Speaker 4: sons know that it was me that had the problem,

741
00:41:01,520 --> 00:41:03,840
Speaker 4: it wasn't them. As I was growing up, and so

742
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 4: I wrote a letter to all three of my sons.

743
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:08,040
Speaker 4: I was still the SEAAC at the time, and I

744
00:41:08,120 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 4: included a book. The name of the book is Why

745
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:14,840
Speaker 4: Is Dad So Mad? A book about PTSD and military families.

746
00:41:15,160 --> 00:41:18,680
Speaker 4: It is a children's book written by the author Seth

747
00:41:18,840 --> 00:41:24,480
Speaker 4: Castle and illustrated by Carrisa Gonzalez Oathen Why is Dad

748
00:41:24,640 --> 00:41:28,759
Speaker 4: So Mad? Oh? Wow? And I sent that to them

749
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:32,920
Speaker 4: so that they could understand or hopefully understand that what

750
00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 4: I was going through wasn't because I was a bad father.

751
00:41:37,960 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 4: It was because I had this thing known as post

752
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:46,080
Speaker 4: traumatic stress disorder that I hadn't come to terms with,

753
00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:50,239
Speaker 4: and I certainly hadn't accepted it or anything like that.

754
00:41:50,880 --> 00:41:53,040
Speaker 4: That was probably one of the most emotional things I

755
00:41:53,120 --> 00:41:56,640
Speaker 4: had to do, and one of the most gratifying was

756
00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:59,120
Speaker 4: to write that letter to my sons and give them

757
00:41:59,200 --> 00:42:03,960
Speaker 4: this book so that they could understand what PTSD is about.

758
00:42:04,760 --> 00:42:07,640
Speaker 2: It's almost an additional layer of therapy that you got

759
00:42:07,680 --> 00:42:11,239
Speaker 2: to go through by unleashing that and getting that off

760
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:13,560
Speaker 2: of your soul. Thinking back on your life's journey, if

761
00:42:13,600 --> 00:42:17,000
Speaker 2: there was one person or organization that's made a significant

762
00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:19,840
Speaker 2: impact on your life, who or what would that be?

763
00:42:20,600 --> 00:42:25,080
Speaker 4: Absolutely it's the United States Military, as you just described, Ashley,

764
00:42:25,880 --> 00:42:29,400
Speaker 4: the power of our nation, the United States of America

765
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:34,920
Speaker 4: where opportunity and the American dream are alive. And then

766
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,680
Speaker 4: the United States Military that allowed me to go from

767
00:42:38,640 --> 00:42:41,400
Speaker 4: some kid that had no purpose, motivation, and direction or

768
00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:45,040
Speaker 4: inspiration to all of a sudden, not only building myself

769
00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:48,120
Speaker 4: as a member of this warrior class, growing my family

770
00:42:48,239 --> 00:42:52,600
Speaker 4: as well, growing my potential and everything. What's culminated in

771
00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:56,600
Speaker 4: me having the honor to serve as the senior enlisted

772
00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,200
Speaker 4: guy in the Department of Defense, it has to be

773
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 4: the United States Military. The person is obviously my wife, Sandra.

774
00:43:04,320 --> 00:43:06,439
Speaker 4: I've had a lot of influential people in my life,

775
00:43:06,719 --> 00:43:10,200
Speaker 4: but I could not have made this journey for almost

776
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:13,160
Speaker 4: thirty eight years were she not by my side through

777
00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:15,919
Speaker 4: the good times, the bad times, in all the fun

778
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:17,200
Speaker 4: that we've had.

779
00:43:17,880 --> 00:43:20,040
Speaker 2: I thought this was going to be a military episode,

780
00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:22,719
Speaker 2: and it's turned into this love story, like love a

781
00:43:22,800 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 2: country that y'all's beautiful relationship.

782
00:43:25,640 --> 00:43:29,120
Speaker 1: It's awesome, hey, But like, here's the thing. Most people

783
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:34,160
Speaker 1: could get on a ship, a plane, put on a

784
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 1: uniform and go do the things that we did. Yeah,

785
00:43:38,960 --> 00:43:41,200
Speaker 1: with the right amount of training, I think most people

786
00:43:41,239 --> 00:43:42,800
Speaker 1: could do, because most people will tell me like I

787
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:44,560
Speaker 1: could never do that, and I'm like, well, you don't

788
00:43:44,600 --> 00:43:44,759
Speaker 1: know that.

789
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:45,880
Speaker 4: You don't know that.

790
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 1: Very few could be the backbone, the people that hold

791
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:54,319
Speaker 1: it down at home and keep it together and keep

792
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 1: the wills turning and keep it well oiled while maintaining

793
00:43:58,800 --> 00:44:05,759
Speaker 1: their composure. Like that to me, Send me to the front. Yeah,

794
00:44:06,160 --> 00:44:08,759
Speaker 1: all day, every day. I'll eat the same MRI over

795
00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:11,000
Speaker 1: and over and over again. If you tell me that

796
00:44:11,040 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 1: I have to stay at home with the kids, not

797
00:44:12,760 --> 00:44:15,680
Speaker 1: knowing where my spouse is, not know send me to

798
00:44:15,760 --> 00:44:19,719
Speaker 1: the front with the water gun. I'll make it work,

799
00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 1: like straight up, That's how I feel about it. That's

800
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:24,200
Speaker 1: the truth of the matter.

801
00:44:24,880 --> 00:44:27,839
Speaker 4: Hey, brother, you know, we live in a world where

802
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:31,239
Speaker 4: people need safe spaces. Our safe space was wearing eighty

803
00:44:31,280 --> 00:44:33,759
Speaker 4: to one hundred pounds of kit every day with a

804
00:44:33,880 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 4: rifle with two hundred and ten rounds of ammunition, surrounded

805
00:44:36,920 --> 00:44:39,719
Speaker 4: by enemy, but surrounded by our brothers and sisters that

806
00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:42,799
Speaker 4: were willing to make the sacrifices up. That was easy. Yeah,

807
00:44:43,120 --> 00:44:45,560
Speaker 4: what's hard is dealing with what's going on back home.

808
00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:48,040
Speaker 4: That's right, I know, And I wouldn't wish that on

809
00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:54,040
Speaker 4: myself for nothing. I have so much admiration for my wife,

810
00:44:54,239 --> 00:44:57,480
Speaker 4: for people like Ashley and all the military spouses out there,

811
00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:01,440
Speaker 4: because they are an integral part of our national security, no.

812
00:45:01,560 --> 00:45:06,000
Speaker 1: Doubt about it. What do you do to recharge? What

813
00:45:06,120 --> 00:45:08,440
Speaker 1: do you do to say I need to take a

814
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:10,560
Speaker 1: step back and recharge the batteries?

815
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:15,080
Speaker 4: It's uh spending with my family. I'm a pretty simple guy,

816
00:45:15,560 --> 00:45:17,920
Speaker 4: you know. I love watching TV Land and stuff like that.

817
00:45:18,080 --> 00:45:23,840
Speaker 4: I'm a homebody really, but my recharging is uh spending

818
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:26,319
Speaker 4: it with family. Sandra and I every quarter we try

819
00:45:26,360 --> 00:45:28,960
Speaker 4: to take a mini vacation somewhere, even if it's an

820
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:33,839
Speaker 4: overnight trip to a local casino or something. Just being

821
00:45:33,920 --> 00:45:37,320
Speaker 4: able to not have to worry about anything, enjoy the

822
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,839
Speaker 4: love of my life with a cold beverage and maybe

823
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:43,480
Speaker 4: going some karaoke and some dancing in there. That's kind

824
00:45:43,520 --> 00:45:47,400
Speaker 4: of I've never forgotten that it's okay and it's not

825
00:45:47,520 --> 00:45:51,640
Speaker 4: a sin to have fun. Absolutely, and so I am

826
00:45:51,680 --> 00:45:55,400
Speaker 4: all about turning myself into a jackass by getting on

827
00:45:55,480 --> 00:45:58,080
Speaker 4: a microphone and belting out some blank.

828
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:03,960
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what, bro yeah before I ask drops

829
00:46:04,000 --> 00:46:08,200
Speaker 1: the last question on you, just from our short conversation.

830
00:46:08,840 --> 00:46:12,080
Speaker 1: Trust me when I tell you this. We were family

831
00:46:12,600 --> 00:46:14,000
Speaker 1: long before we were family.

832
00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:15,520
Speaker 4: I appreciate it. Brother.

833
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:19,360
Speaker 3: Last question, what feeds your soul.

834
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:25,040
Speaker 4: Doing for others? Seeing others succeed? What feeds me my

835
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:28,239
Speaker 4: soul is seeing someone that reached out to me for

836
00:46:28,360 --> 00:46:31,879
Speaker 4: advice or that I've helped mentor and seeing them reach

837
00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:35,759
Speaker 4: their untapped potential, or seeing them reach their goals, or

838
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:37,880
Speaker 4: seeing them get the things that they never thought they

839
00:46:37,920 --> 00:46:41,200
Speaker 4: could do. And the biggest pain I've had is where

840
00:46:41,320 --> 00:46:44,439
Speaker 4: I've loved someone so much and wanted them to reach

841
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:48,480
Speaker 4: a goal and they've failed to reach that goal. I

842
00:46:48,680 --> 00:46:52,840
Speaker 4: hurt as much as they have because for some odd reason,

843
00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:55,400
Speaker 4: I feel like I had something to do with that.

844
00:46:55,840 --> 00:47:00,680
Speaker 4: So what feeds me is helping others attain their goals.

845
00:47:01,400 --> 00:47:05,439
Speaker 2: Absolutely well, this has been soul food for us. John

846
00:47:05,480 --> 00:47:08,360
Speaker 2: Wayne Truxil, thank you for everything that you've done for

847
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:11,000
Speaker 2: our country. Thank you for everything that you're continuing to

848
00:47:11,120 --> 00:47:15,120
Speaker 2: do for your service, and everything that you've done since

849
00:47:15,160 --> 00:47:18,759
Speaker 2: you retired out of the military after thirty almost thirty

850
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:22,320
Speaker 2: eight years. We're truly grateful and just so great to

851
00:47:22,360 --> 00:47:23,800
Speaker 2: get to know you a little bit better today.

852
00:47:23,840 --> 00:47:25,240
Speaker 3: And this was the good stuff.

853
00:47:25,719 --> 00:47:30,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'd tell you what, brother, your family, anything, absolutely time,

854
00:47:30,360 --> 00:47:35,520
Speaker 1: anywhere say the word zero hesitation, I will jump in

855
00:47:35,719 --> 00:47:38,719
Speaker 1: fake leg and all. Don't worry about that at all.

856
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,160
Speaker 1: That's one thing I can guarant damn to you.

857
00:47:42,200 --> 00:47:45,320
Speaker 4: Well, I appreciate a brother and to shake you on, Ashley,

858
00:47:45,400 --> 00:47:48,359
Speaker 4: thank you so much for allowing me this opportunity. Thank

859
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:49,400
Speaker 4: you for being family.

860
00:47:55,520 --> 00:47:57,640
Speaker 3: Wow, that's awesome. What a great guy.

861
00:47:57,920 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 2: John Wayne Truxel thirty eight years of service to our country.

862
00:48:02,160 --> 00:48:05,520
Speaker 2: There will only ever be one, no kidding, what a legend.

863
00:48:06,160 --> 00:48:09,960
Speaker 1: I still just can't picture walking into those two offices,

864
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:14,480
Speaker 1: to those two Marines and say, hey, I'm going to

865
00:48:14,560 --> 00:48:18,680
Speaker 1: have to get back from launch a little late. That therapy, right,

866
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:22,200
Speaker 1: What an amazing list of accomplishments. That's the type of

867
00:48:22,280 --> 00:48:25,759
Speaker 1: leader the military needs. He was all about his guys and.

868
00:48:25,800 --> 00:48:28,440
Speaker 2: Would work so hard to become a more effective leader

869
00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:32,279
Speaker 2: for himself, for his men, for his family. Just an

870
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:35,400
Speaker 2: incredible guy. What was the story he told you about

871
00:48:36,320 --> 00:48:37,200
Speaker 2: about the essays?

872
00:48:38,360 --> 00:48:42,400
Speaker 1: Okay, here's the thing. We're all about physical punishment because

873
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:46,879
Speaker 1: we're physical beings as warfighters. That's what we do day

874
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:51,520
Speaker 1: in and day out, don't make us exercise our brains

875
00:48:52,440 --> 00:48:55,000
Speaker 1: if it doesn't have to do with clearing a room

876
00:48:55,239 --> 00:48:58,279
Speaker 1: in a three D warfare environment. And he would make

877
00:48:58,400 --> 00:49:01,000
Speaker 1: his guys, because you can only get a human being

878
00:49:01,040 --> 00:49:04,399
Speaker 1: to fill so many sandbags. He would make him write

879
00:49:04,520 --> 00:49:09,600
Speaker 1: five thousand word essays, typed up sighted and give him

880
00:49:09,680 --> 00:49:11,279
Speaker 1: twenty four hour turnaround time.

881
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:14,480
Speaker 3: I don't know many college kids that could accomplish.

882
00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:16,520
Speaker 1: I would rather be beaten with a cane.

883
00:49:17,880 --> 00:49:19,200
Speaker 3: That's just cruel punishment.

884
00:49:19,320 --> 00:49:23,000
Speaker 1: It would be less painful. No wonder they listened.

885
00:49:23,239 --> 00:49:25,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, again, the type of leader he was.

886
00:49:25,680 --> 00:49:27,719
Speaker 1: I would have looked at Gunny like he was high

887
00:49:27,960 --> 00:49:29,839
Speaker 1: on math if he told you to do that, Yeah,

888
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:31,239
Speaker 1: because I would have looked at him like, wait, have

889
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:33,799
Speaker 1: you met me? Yeah, that's not ever gonna happen.

890
00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:37,080
Speaker 2: Ever, so many great lessons to learn from this conversation,

891
00:49:37,239 --> 00:49:38,960
Speaker 2: you know, for me personally, the one he said, always

892
00:49:38,960 --> 00:49:41,400
Speaker 2: striving to be better the next day than I was

893
00:49:41,520 --> 00:49:44,200
Speaker 2: that day. And clearly you know his love of his

894
00:49:44,320 --> 00:49:47,360
Speaker 2: wife and his boys, and his men, you know, and

895
00:49:47,560 --> 00:49:50,440
Speaker 2: women that served underneath them for decades.

896
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's definitely got a memory that's second to none too.

897
00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:58,920
Speaker 1: I mean remembering exact dates, exact people, and I mean

898
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:03,000
Speaker 1: this is no small fee. But Alejandro Alsano, yeah, first

899
00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:07,399
Speaker 1: guy lost and service to our nation, and he'll never

900
00:50:07,480 --> 00:50:10,200
Speaker 1: be forgotten, just like John Wayne will never forget them.

901
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:12,800
Speaker 1: We won't either. All their names need to be spoken.

902
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:16,040
Speaker 1: It's why we get to take advantage of this presiuous

903
00:50:16,080 --> 00:50:18,960
Speaker 1: thing that we call freedom every single day, agreed.

904
00:50:19,239 --> 00:50:22,759
Speaker 2: And for men like John Wayne Truxel, who are just

905
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:26,120
Speaker 2: the epitome of what it means to be a proud

906
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:28,239
Speaker 2: countryman to go on the cloth of our nation for

907
00:50:28,360 --> 00:50:29,360
Speaker 2: so long and do it.

908
00:50:29,880 --> 00:50:32,319
Speaker 3: I mean you can hear the pride just oozing from him.

909
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:37,239
Speaker 1: Unless we forget the great and the mighty and the

910
00:50:37,320 --> 00:50:38,160
Speaker 1: one and only.

911
00:50:38,040 --> 00:50:40,839
Speaker 3: Sandra, that's right. I can't wait to meet her either.

912
00:50:41,320 --> 00:50:44,120
Speaker 1: I mean, clearly she was put on this planet with

913
00:50:44,480 --> 00:50:45,680
Speaker 1: one job, that's right.

914
00:50:46,400 --> 00:50:47,720
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for listening.

915
00:50:47,840 --> 00:50:50,040
Speaker 2: If this episode touched you today, please share it and

916
00:50:50,120 --> 00:50:51,839
Speaker 2: be part of making someone else's day better.

917
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:52,879
Speaker 4: Put on your.

918
00:50:52,800 --> 00:50:55,680
Speaker 1: Badass caves and be great today. And remember you can't

919
00:50:55,719 --> 00:50:59,120
Speaker 1: do epic stuff without epic people. Thank you for listening

920
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:04,760
Speaker 1: to the good Stuff. The Good Stuff is executive produced

921
00:51:04,760 --> 00:51:08,920
Speaker 1: by Ashley Shick, Jacob Schick, Leah Pictures and q Code Media.

922
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:13,480
Speaker 1: Hosted by Ashley Shick and Jacob Shick. Produced by Nick

923
00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:19,840
Speaker 1: Cassolini and Ryan Countshouse post production supervisor Will Tindi. Music

924
00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:24,080
Speaker 1: editing by Will heywood Smith, edited by Mike Robinson,