1 00:00:01,760 --> 00:00:11,720 Speaker 1: Wol Zone Media book Club book Club, book Club book Club. Hello, 2 00:00:12,039 --> 00:00:14,760 Speaker 1: it's the Cool Zone Media book Club. I'm your host, 3 00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:17,200 Speaker 1: Margaret Giljoy and with me today as a guest. Is 4 00:00:17,320 --> 00:00:21,800 Speaker 1: you the listener? You're the guest today and you can 5 00:00:21,880 --> 00:00:27,120 Speaker 1: respond out loud to the people around you as you listen. 6 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 1: It'll be especially funny if you have hadphones on every Sunday, 7 00:00:32,120 --> 00:00:35,360 Speaker 1: I bring you a different story. This time, I'm bringing 8 00:00:35,400 --> 00:00:40,000 Speaker 1: you a different story. You might have heard of this 9 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:43,800 Speaker 1: one before. It's a feminist classic from eighteen ninety one. 10 00:00:44,120 --> 00:00:46,839 Speaker 1: It's called The Yellow Wallpaper and it was written by 11 00:00:46,920 --> 00:00:51,200 Speaker 1: Charlotte Perkins Gilman. It was actually published in eighteen ninety two. 12 00:00:51,600 --> 00:00:54,200 Speaker 1: Charlotte couldn't find a publisher for it for a while 13 00:00:54,280 --> 00:00:57,880 Speaker 1: because the first person I rejected it was like everyone 14 00:00:57,880 --> 00:01:03,600 Speaker 1: who reads this will be driven mad. So content warning, 15 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:08,280 Speaker 1: you'll be driven mad if you listen to this. But 16 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:11,000 Speaker 1: eventually it was published by the New England Magazine, which 17 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:15,320 Speaker 1: is a literary magazine that there's been like eight magazines 18 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:19,759 Speaker 1: with that title. And it was written by a rather 19 00:01:20,000 --> 00:01:24,640 Speaker 1: interesting woman, an early feminist and zinester, Charlotte Perkins Gilman. 20 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,199 Speaker 1: And I'm gonna tell you about her really quick. Also, 21 00:01:28,040 --> 00:01:30,399 Speaker 1: we're gonna split this story up over two weeks because 22 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:32,640 Speaker 1: it's a little bit longer than the average story. But 23 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:36,760 Speaker 1: I'm really excited about bringing you all classics sometimes, like 24 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 1: one of my goals with this book club is to 25 00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:43,640 Speaker 1: read you some of the stories that stay in my mind, 26 00:01:43,920 --> 00:01:48,920 Speaker 1: some of the stories that I think about a lot. So. 27 00:01:49,200 --> 00:01:52,600 Speaker 1: Charlotte Perkins Gilman was born in eighteen sixty and she 28 00:01:52,640 --> 00:01:54,800 Speaker 1: grew up poor as hell with her mom and her brother, 29 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:58,160 Speaker 1: but also her father's aunts. Her father had fucked off 30 00:01:58,200 --> 00:02:02,040 Speaker 1: and ditched the family basically, but his aunts kind of 31 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:05,640 Speaker 1: stepped in, and this included Harriet Beecher Stowe is the 32 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:09,040 Speaker 1: woman who wrote Uncle Tom's Cabin, So clearly she has 33 00:02:09,080 --> 00:02:14,960 Speaker 1: some like literariness in her family. But she also her 34 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:18,440 Speaker 1: mom was incredibly emotionally distant and wouldn't let her have 35 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 1: friends or read books. So anyway, she grew up a tomboy. 36 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:27,359 Speaker 1: She was smart as hell but bad at school, which 37 00:02:27,400 --> 00:02:31,160 Speaker 1: I fucking love for her. She was also bisexual. She 38 00:02:31,639 --> 00:02:34,560 Speaker 1: loved and lived with different women and men over the 39 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:37,400 Speaker 1: course of her life. She had a girlfriend when she 40 00:02:37,520 --> 00:02:40,560 Speaker 1: was young, but that lady left Charlotte to marry a man, 41 00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:43,560 Speaker 1: and Charlotte swore off romance after that until she wound 42 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:46,840 Speaker 1: up married herself and she had a kid. As a 43 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:48,959 Speaker 1: result of having a kid, she wrote the story were 44 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,799 Speaker 1: about to read, and then she left her husband to 45 00:02:50,840 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 1: go back with living with women and then eventually married 46 00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:58,720 Speaker 1: a man, and etc. Etc. She was a lifelong activist. 47 00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:01,640 Speaker 1: She was a socialist feminist, and she spent her life 48 00:03:01,639 --> 00:03:05,320 Speaker 1: traveling around and talking about feminism. She added a newspaper 49 00:03:05,400 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 1: and wrote books and shit, including her own magazine called 50 00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:12,320 Speaker 1: The Forerunner, in which she published her fiction. She also 51 00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:15,239 Speaker 1: published a serialized novella That's too Long for book Club, 52 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:18,200 Speaker 1: which I'm sad about because it's how I first heard 53 00:03:18,240 --> 00:03:21,040 Speaker 1: about her myself. It's this book called her Land, and 54 00:03:21,120 --> 00:03:23,760 Speaker 1: I highly recommend it, not as like, go out and 55 00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,080 Speaker 1: do what this book recommends, but as like a way 56 00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:31,519 Speaker 1: to understand early twentieth century utopian feminism. It's really fascinating. 57 00:03:31,840 --> 00:03:34,679 Speaker 1: It's about an all woman socialist utopia that uses like 58 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:39,320 Speaker 1: food forestry and basically permaculture and just is way ahead 59 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 1: of its time and has all the problems with utopianism, 60 00:03:42,920 --> 00:03:46,360 Speaker 1: some of which we'll talk about in a second. Her 61 00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 1: feminism overall was pretty cool. She was against gender essentialism. 62 00:03:52,080 --> 00:03:55,240 Speaker 1: She said, quote, there is no female mind. The brain 63 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:58,160 Speaker 1: is not an organ of sex, might as well speak 64 00:03:58,160 --> 00:04:02,640 Speaker 1: of a female liver. She also fought for communal housing 65 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:04,080 Speaker 1: so that you don't have to like get married to 66 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:08,000 Speaker 1: be financially stable. Basically, she was like not excited about 67 00:04:08,240 --> 00:04:11,400 Speaker 1: the nuclear family, or rather, she was not excited about 68 00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:14,360 Speaker 1: the nuclear family as being like the default and it 69 00:04:14,520 --> 00:04:19,920 Speaker 1: being She acknowledged that families exist as a economic relationship 70 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,039 Speaker 1: as much as anything else, and so she was always 71 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:28,520 Speaker 1: looking for ways to break the prisons of that economic relationship. 72 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:33,640 Speaker 1: But she was also a weird old timey racist in 73 00:04:33,680 --> 00:04:36,440 Speaker 1: a more complicated way. Normally, when you say old timey racist, 74 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:38,840 Speaker 1: you mean somebody's like real, real bad, And I mean 75 00:04:40,279 --> 00:04:45,240 Speaker 1: she was trying, but not incredibly well you know, or 76 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:47,760 Speaker 1: didn't didn't always, Okay, I'll just tell you about it. 77 00:04:48,880 --> 00:04:51,760 Speaker 1: She was a eugenicist in that classic early feminist twentieth 78 00:04:51,800 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 1: century way. If you want to hear me talk way 79 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,840 Speaker 1: too much about that, you can listen to any number 80 00:04:55,880 --> 00:04:59,720 Speaker 1: of my episodes about early feminists and also early socialists 81 00:04:59,760 --> 00:05:03,040 Speaker 1: and and folks of all kinds and how people interacted 82 00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:06,320 Speaker 1: with eugenics over the course of the early twentieth century. 83 00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:10,359 Speaker 1: She did fight for the rights of interracial marriage, and 84 00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:14,000 Speaker 1: she spoke for racial harmony. She spent a lot of 85 00:05:14,040 --> 00:05:18,719 Speaker 1: her time condemning the US's racist history, and she thought 86 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:20,839 Speaker 1: that the problems with black people were the fault of 87 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:25,560 Speaker 1: white people because of slavery and racism, and that it 88 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:29,839 Speaker 1: was white people's responsibility to help black people. But the 89 00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,159 Speaker 1: ways in which she came up to do it is 90 00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:37,159 Speaker 1: where you get into her racism. She was like, she 91 00:05:37,200 --> 00:05:41,560 Speaker 1: had real sketchy solutions, like can script all unemployed black 92 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:45,400 Speaker 1: folks into a quasi military state labor force for job training, 93 00:05:46,120 --> 00:05:49,560 Speaker 1: which is not a good look. That's not a good 94 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,800 Speaker 1: You were wrong person who died a long time ago. 95 00:05:54,800 --> 00:05:58,040 Speaker 1: But yeah, she wrote this story and a bunch of others, 96 00:05:58,760 --> 00:06:01,880 Speaker 1: and then well, actually, in a lot of ways, her 97 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:05,840 Speaker 1: and her stories were largely forgotten until they were brought 98 00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:08,520 Speaker 1: back into print in the early seventies by feminist publishers, 99 00:06:08,600 --> 00:06:12,359 Speaker 1: and in this case that was the still existent feminist press. 100 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:16,880 Speaker 1: And I think about this story all the time, and 101 00:06:16,920 --> 00:06:18,320 Speaker 1: at the end of the story we'll talk about some 102 00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:23,080 Speaker 1: of the influences it had. So get ready for the 103 00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:29,880 Speaker 1: story The Yellow Wallpaper by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, written in 104 00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:34,520 Speaker 1: eighteen ninety one, published in eighteen ninety two. It is 105 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:37,919 Speaker 1: very seldom that mere ordinary people like John and myself 106 00:06:38,120 --> 00:06:42,560 Speaker 1: secure ancestral halls for the summer, a colonial mansion, a 107 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:46,600 Speaker 1: hereditary estate. I would say a haunted house, and reach 108 00:06:46,680 --> 00:06:49,800 Speaker 1: the height of romantic felicity, but that would be asking 109 00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:54,120 Speaker 1: too much of fate. Still, I will proudly declare that 110 00:06:54,160 --> 00:06:57,520 Speaker 1: there is something queer about it. Else why should it 111 00:06:57,520 --> 00:07:01,240 Speaker 1: be let so cheaply? And why have stood so long untenanted? 112 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:04,920 Speaker 1: John laughs at me, of course, but one expects that 113 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:09,640 Speaker 1: in marriage. John is practical in the extreme. He has 114 00:07:09,680 --> 00:07:13,560 Speaker 1: no patience with faith, an intense horror of superstition, and 115 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:16,440 Speaker 1: he scoffs openly at any talk of things not to 116 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:20,800 Speaker 1: be felt and seen and put down in figures. John 117 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:24,080 Speaker 1: is a physician, and perhaps I would not say this 118 00:07:24,120 --> 00:07:26,440 Speaker 1: to a living soul, of course, but this is dead 119 00:07:26,480 --> 00:07:30,560 Speaker 1: paper and a great relief to my mind. Perhaps that 120 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:34,360 Speaker 1: is one reason I do not get well faster. You see, 121 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:38,240 Speaker 1: he does not believe that I am sick. And what 122 00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:41,520 Speaker 1: can one do if a physician of high standing and 123 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:45,480 Speaker 1: one's own husband assures friends and relatives that there is 124 00:07:45,560 --> 00:07:49,040 Speaker 1: really nothing the matter with one but temporary nervous depression, 125 00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:54,560 Speaker 1: a slight hysterical tendency. What is one to do? My 126 00:07:54,640 --> 00:07:57,520 Speaker 1: brother is also a physician, and also a high standing 127 00:07:57,840 --> 00:08:02,080 Speaker 1: and he says the same thing. So I take phosphates 128 00:08:02,160 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 1: or phosphights, whichever it is, and tonics and journeys and 129 00:08:07,400 --> 00:08:12,280 Speaker 1: air and exercise, and am absolutely forbidden to work until 130 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:19,120 Speaker 1: I am well again. Personally, I disagree with their ideas. Personally, 131 00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:22,760 Speaker 1: I believe that congenial work with excitement and change would 132 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:27,160 Speaker 1: do me good. But what is one to do. I 133 00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:29,440 Speaker 1: did write for a while in spite of them, but 134 00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:32,800 Speaker 1: it does exhaust me a good deal having to be 135 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:35,880 Speaker 1: so sly about it or else meet with heavy opposition. 136 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:39,280 Speaker 1: I sometimes fancy that, in my condition, if I had 137 00:08:39,360 --> 00:08:43,439 Speaker 1: less opposition and more society and stimulus. But John says, 138 00:08:43,600 --> 00:08:45,920 Speaker 1: the very worst thing I can do is to think 139 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,000 Speaker 1: about my condition, and I confess it always makes me 140 00:08:49,040 --> 00:08:52,760 Speaker 1: feel bad. So I will let it alone and talk 141 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:57,440 Speaker 1: about the house. Antig with these sweet, sweet deals from 142 00:08:57,440 --> 00:09:00,880 Speaker 1: the advertisers that interrupt this thing, Oh, oh god dear, 143 00:09:01,000 --> 00:09:17,840 Speaker 1: they are the most beautiful place. It is quite alone, 144 00:09:18,000 --> 00:09:21,040 Speaker 1: standing well back from the road, quite three miles from 145 00:09:21,080 --> 00:09:23,720 Speaker 1: the village. It makes me think of English places that 146 00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:27,040 Speaker 1: you read about for their hedges and walls and gates 147 00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:29,960 Speaker 1: that lock, and lots of separate little houses for the 148 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:35,280 Speaker 1: gardeners and people. There is a delicious garden. I never 149 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:38,400 Speaker 1: saw such a garden, large and shady, full of box 150 00:09:38,480 --> 00:09:42,240 Speaker 1: bordered paths and lined with long grape covered arbors with 151 00:09:42,280 --> 00:09:46,320 Speaker 1: seats under them. There were greenhouses too, but they are 152 00:09:46,360 --> 00:09:50,319 Speaker 1: all broken now. There was some legal trouble. I believe 153 00:09:50,679 --> 00:09:55,280 Speaker 1: something about the airs and cohirs. Anyhow, the place has 154 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:59,920 Speaker 1: been empty for years. That spoils my ghostliness. I am afraid, 155 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 1: but I don't care. There is something strange about the house. 156 00:10:04,640 --> 00:10:07,920 Speaker 1: I can feel it. I even said so to John 157 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,400 Speaker 1: one moonlit evening, but he said what I felt was 158 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:14,400 Speaker 1: a draft and shut the window. I get unreasonably angry 159 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:17,840 Speaker 1: with John sometimes. I'm sure I never used to be 160 00:10:17,880 --> 00:10:21,199 Speaker 1: so sensitive. I think it is due to this nervous condition. 161 00:10:22,320 --> 00:10:25,240 Speaker 1: But John says if I feel so, I shall neglect 162 00:10:25,240 --> 00:10:28,720 Speaker 1: proper self control. So I take pains to control myself 163 00:10:29,160 --> 00:10:32,480 Speaker 1: before him at least, and that makes me very tired. 164 00:10:34,160 --> 00:10:37,040 Speaker 1: I don't like our room a bit. I wanted one 165 00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,800 Speaker 1: downstairs that opened on the piazza and had roses all 166 00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:42,920 Speaker 1: over the window in such pretty old fashioned chintz hangings. 167 00:10:43,679 --> 00:10:46,400 Speaker 1: But John would not hear of it. He said there 168 00:10:46,440 --> 00:10:48,840 Speaker 1: was only one window, and not room for two beds, 169 00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:51,160 Speaker 1: and no near room for him if he took another. 170 00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:55,080 Speaker 1: He is very careful and loving and hardly lets me 171 00:10:55,160 --> 00:11:00,360 Speaker 1: stir without special direction. I have a schedule prescription each 172 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:03,240 Speaker 1: hour in the day, and he takes all care from me, 173 00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:06,680 Speaker 1: and I feel so basely ungrateful not to value it more. 174 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:10,960 Speaker 1: He said. We came here solely on my account, that 175 00:11:11,040 --> 00:11:13,240 Speaker 1: I was to have perfect rest and all the air 176 00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 1: I could get. Your exercise depends on your strength, my dear, 177 00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:21,760 Speaker 1: said he, and your food somewhat on your appetite, but 178 00:11:21,960 --> 00:11:26,240 Speaker 1: air you can absorb all the time. So we took 179 00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:29,960 Speaker 1: the nursery at the top of the house. It is 180 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:34,120 Speaker 1: a big, airy room, the whole floor nearly with windows 181 00:11:34,160 --> 00:11:37,880 Speaker 1: that look all ways and air and sunshine galore. It 182 00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:41,439 Speaker 1: was nursery first, and then playground and gymnasium. I should judge, 183 00:11:41,920 --> 00:11:44,760 Speaker 1: for the windows are barred for little children, and there 184 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:48,040 Speaker 1: are rings and things in the wall. The paint and 185 00:11:48,120 --> 00:11:51,120 Speaker 1: paper look as if a boy's school had used it. 186 00:11:51,120 --> 00:11:54,240 Speaker 1: It is stripped off the paper in great patches all 187 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:56,600 Speaker 1: around the head of my bed, about as far as 188 00:11:56,640 --> 00:11:59,040 Speaker 1: I can reach, and in a great place on the 189 00:11:59,040 --> 00:12:02,160 Speaker 1: other side of the room low down. I never saw 190 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:06,760 Speaker 1: a worse paper in my life. One of those sprawling, 191 00:12:06,880 --> 00:12:12,080 Speaker 1: flamboyant patterns, committing every artistic sin. It is dull enough 192 00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:15,839 Speaker 1: to confuse the eye in following, pronounced enough to constantly 193 00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:19,640 Speaker 1: irritate and provoke study. And when you follow the lame, 194 00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:24,080 Speaker 1: uncertain curves for a little distance, they suddenly commit suicide, 195 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:29,760 Speaker 1: plunge off at outrageous angles, destroy themselves an unheard of contradictions. 196 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:36,640 Speaker 1: The color is repellent, almost revolting, a smoldering, unclean yellow, 197 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:41,960 Speaker 1: strangely faded by the slow turning sunlight. It is a 198 00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:46,240 Speaker 1: dull yet lurid orange, in some places a sickly sulfur 199 00:12:46,320 --> 00:12:50,360 Speaker 1: tint in others. No wonder the children hated it. I 200 00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 1: should hate it myself if I had to live in 201 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:56,240 Speaker 1: this room. Long. There comes John, and I must put 202 00:12:56,280 --> 00:12:59,040 Speaker 1: this away. He hates to have me write a word. 203 00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:03,439 Speaker 1: We have been here two weeks and I haven't felt 204 00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:07,400 Speaker 1: like writing before since that first day. I am sitting 205 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:10,360 Speaker 1: by the window now up in this atrocious nursery, and 206 00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 1: there is nothing to hinder my writing as much as 207 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:16,679 Speaker 1: I please, save lack of strength. John is away all 208 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:19,480 Speaker 1: day and even some nights when his cases are serious. 209 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:23,720 Speaker 1: I am glad my case is not serious. But these 210 00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:27,880 Speaker 1: nervous troubles are dreadfully depressing. John does not know how 211 00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:30,880 Speaker 1: much I really suffer. He knows there is no reason 212 00:13:31,000 --> 00:13:35,640 Speaker 1: to suffer, and that satisfies him. Of course. It is 213 00:13:35,679 --> 00:13:39,000 Speaker 1: only nervousness. It does weigh on me so not to 214 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,200 Speaker 1: do my duty in any way. I meant to be 215 00:13:42,280 --> 00:13:45,640 Speaker 1: such a help to John, such a real rest and comfort, 216 00:13:46,120 --> 00:13:50,920 Speaker 1: And here I am a comparative burden. Already Nobody would 217 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,120 Speaker 1: believe what an effort it is to do what little 218 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:56,640 Speaker 1: I am able to dress and entertain and order things. 219 00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:00,520 Speaker 1: It is fortunate Mary is so good with him, baby, 220 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:04,520 Speaker 1: such a dear baby, And yet I cannot be with him. 221 00:14:04,559 --> 00:14:08,440 Speaker 1: It makes me so nervous. I suppose John never was 222 00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:11,280 Speaker 1: nervous in his life. He laughs at me so about 223 00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:15,720 Speaker 1: this wallpaper. At first he meant to repaper the room, 224 00:14:16,160 --> 00:14:18,320 Speaker 1: but afterwards he said, I was letting it get the 225 00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,400 Speaker 1: better of me, and that nothing was worse for a 226 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:24,720 Speaker 1: nervous patient than to give way to such fancies. He 227 00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:27,000 Speaker 1: said that after the wallpaper was changed, it would be 228 00:14:27,040 --> 00:14:30,400 Speaker 1: the heavy bedstead, and then the barred windows, and in 229 00:14:30,480 --> 00:14:33,240 Speaker 1: that gate at the head of the stairs and so on. 230 00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:37,160 Speaker 1: You know, the place is doing you good, he said. 231 00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:40,120 Speaker 1: And really, dear, I don't care to renovate the house, 232 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,920 Speaker 1: just for a three months rental. Then do let us 233 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:47,280 Speaker 1: go downstairs, I said, there are such pretty rooms there. 234 00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:50,760 Speaker 1: Then he took me in his arms and called me 235 00:14:50,800 --> 00:14:53,440 Speaker 1: a blessed little goose, and said he would go down 236 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:56,360 Speaker 1: cellar if I wished, and have it whitewashed into the bargain. 237 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:59,560 Speaker 1: But he is right enough about the beds and the 238 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:03,920 Speaker 1: windows and things. It is as airy and comfortable room 239 00:15:03,960 --> 00:15:06,200 Speaker 1: as one need wish. And of course I would not 240 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,600 Speaker 1: be so silly as to make him uncomfortable just for 241 00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:11,960 Speaker 1: a whim. I'm really getting quite fond of the big room, 242 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:16,240 Speaker 1: all but that horrid paper. Out of one window I 243 00:15:16,280 --> 00:15:20,080 Speaker 1: can see the garden, those mysterious deep shaded arbors, the 244 00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:25,240 Speaker 1: riotous old fashioned flowers and bushes, and gnarly trees. Out 245 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:27,480 Speaker 1: of another, I get a lovely view of the bay 246 00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:31,320 Speaker 1: and a little private wharf belonging to the estate. There 247 00:15:31,360 --> 00:15:34,320 Speaker 1: is a beautiful shaded lane that runs down there from 248 00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:37,640 Speaker 1: the house. I always fancy I see people walking in 249 00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:41,080 Speaker 1: these numerous paths and arbors. But John has cautioned me 250 00:15:41,240 --> 00:15:44,480 Speaker 1: not to give way to fancy in the least. He 251 00:15:44,520 --> 00:15:47,680 Speaker 1: says that with my imaginative power and habit of story making, 252 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:50,600 Speaker 1: a nervous weakness like mine is sure to lead to 253 00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:54,120 Speaker 1: all manner of excited fancies. That I ought to use 254 00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:58,000 Speaker 1: my will in good sense to check the tendency. So 255 00:15:58,080 --> 00:16:02,200 Speaker 1: I try. I think sometimes that if I were only 256 00:16:02,240 --> 00:16:04,960 Speaker 1: well enough to write a little, it would relieve the 257 00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:08,160 Speaker 1: press of ideas and rest me. But I find I 258 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:12,840 Speaker 1: get pretty tired when I try. It is so discouraging 259 00:16:12,880 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 1: not to have any advice in companionship about my work. 260 00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:18,440 Speaker 1: When I get really well, John says we can ask 261 00:16:18,480 --> 00:16:21,680 Speaker 1: cousin Henry and Julia down for a long visit. But 262 00:16:21,760 --> 00:16:24,720 Speaker 1: he says he would soon put fireworks in my pillowcases. 263 00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:29,080 Speaker 1: Let me have those stimulating people about now. I wish 264 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:32,360 Speaker 1: I could get well faster, but I must not think 265 00:16:32,360 --> 00:16:34,920 Speaker 1: about that. This paper looks to me as if it 266 00:16:35,040 --> 00:16:39,240 Speaker 1: knew what a vicious influence it had. There's a recurrent 267 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:42,600 Speaker 1: spot where the pattern lulls like a broken neck, and 268 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 1: two bulbous eyes stare at you upside down. I get 269 00:16:46,880 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: positively angry with the impertinence of it and the everlastingness. 270 00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:55,239 Speaker 1: Up and down in sideways they crawl, and those absurd, 271 00:16:55,560 --> 00:17:00,560 Speaker 1: unblinking eyes are everywhere. There is one place where the 272 00:17:00,600 --> 00:17:04,119 Speaker 1: two breadths didn't match, and the eyes go all up 273 00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:07,320 Speaker 1: and down the line, one a little higher than the other. 274 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:12,240 Speaker 1: I never saw so much expression in an inanimate thing before, 275 00:17:12,600 --> 00:17:15,359 Speaker 1: and we all know how much expression they have. I 276 00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:17,399 Speaker 1: used to lie awake as a child and get more 277 00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:20,400 Speaker 1: entertainment and tear out of blank walls and plain furniture 278 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:23,959 Speaker 1: than most children could find in a toy store. I 279 00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,720 Speaker 1: remember what a kindly wink the knobs of our big 280 00:17:26,720 --> 00:17:29,800 Speaker 1: old bureau used to have. And there was one chair 281 00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:33,439 Speaker 1: that always seemed like a strong friend. I used to 282 00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:35,960 Speaker 1: feel that if any of the other things looked too fierce, 283 00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:39,280 Speaker 1: I could always hop into that chair and be safe. 284 00:17:39,760 --> 00:17:42,719 Speaker 1: But you know what else will keep you safe buying 285 00:17:43,119 --> 00:18:03,200 Speaker 1: objects and or the services from these advertisers. The furniture 286 00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:05,560 Speaker 1: in this room is no worse than inharmonious, however, for 287 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:08,760 Speaker 1: we had to bring it all from downstairs. I suppose 288 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:11,199 Speaker 1: when this was used as a playroom, they had to 289 00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:14,440 Speaker 1: take the nursery things out, And no wonder I never 290 00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:18,760 Speaker 1: saw such ravages as the children have made here. The wallpaper, 291 00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:21,239 Speaker 1: as I said before, is torn off in spots, and 292 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:25,359 Speaker 1: sticketh closer than a brother. They must have had perseverance 293 00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:29,399 Speaker 1: as well as hatred. Then the floor is scratched and 294 00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:33,320 Speaker 1: gouged and splintered. The plaster itself is dug out here 295 00:18:33,359 --> 00:18:36,720 Speaker 1: and there. And this great heavy bed, which is all 296 00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:39,040 Speaker 1: we found in the room, looks as if it had 297 00:18:39,080 --> 00:18:42,680 Speaker 1: been through the wars. But I don't mind it a bit, 298 00:18:43,480 --> 00:18:47,960 Speaker 1: only the paper. There comes John's sister. Such a dear 299 00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:50,480 Speaker 1: girl as she is, and so careful of me, I 300 00:18:50,560 --> 00:18:53,879 Speaker 1: must not let her find me writing. She is a 301 00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:57,840 Speaker 1: perfect and enthusiastic housekeeper, and hopes for no better profession. 302 00:18:58,440 --> 00:19:01,160 Speaker 1: I verily believe she thinks it is the writing which 303 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:04,199 Speaker 1: made me sick. But I can write when she is 304 00:19:04,240 --> 00:19:07,080 Speaker 1: out and see her. A long way off from these windows, 305 00:19:08,119 --> 00:19:10,800 Speaker 1: there is one that commands the road, A lovely shaded 306 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:13,879 Speaker 1: winding road, and one that looks just off over the country, 307 00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:18,000 Speaker 1: A lovely country too, full of great elms and velvet meadows. 308 00:19:19,160 --> 00:19:22,320 Speaker 1: This wallpaper has a kind of sub pattern and a 309 00:19:22,320 --> 00:19:26,200 Speaker 1: different shade, a particularly irritating one, for you can only 310 00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:30,520 Speaker 1: see it in certain lights, and not clearly then, but 311 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:32,680 Speaker 1: in the places where it isn't faded, where the sun 312 00:19:32,760 --> 00:19:36,760 Speaker 1: is just so, I can see a strange, provoking, formless 313 00:19:36,800 --> 00:19:40,280 Speaker 1: sort of figure that seems to sulk about behind that 314 00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:46,840 Speaker 1: silly and conspicuous front design. Their sister on the stairs. Well, 315 00:19:47,040 --> 00:19:49,320 Speaker 1: the fourth of July is over, the people are gone, 316 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,960 Speaker 1: and I am tired out. John thought it might do 317 00:19:52,080 --> 00:19:54,439 Speaker 1: me good to see a little company, so we just 318 00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:57,160 Speaker 1: had Mother and Nelly and the children down for a week. 319 00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:01,040 Speaker 1: Of course I didn't do a thing. Jenny's to everything now, 320 00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:04,800 Speaker 1: but it tired me all the same. John says, if 321 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:06,760 Speaker 1: I don't pick up faster, he shall send me to 322 00:20:06,840 --> 00:20:09,800 Speaker 1: weir Mitchell in the fall. But I don't want to 323 00:20:09,840 --> 00:20:11,920 Speaker 1: go there at all. I had a friend who is 324 00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:15,000 Speaker 1: in his hands once, and she says he is just 325 00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:18,720 Speaker 1: like John and my brother, only more so. Besides, it 326 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,040 Speaker 1: is such an undertaking to go so far. I don't 327 00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:24,240 Speaker 1: feel as if it was worthwhile to turn my hand 328 00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:27,800 Speaker 1: over for anything. And I'm getting dreadfully fretful and querulous. 329 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:31,560 Speaker 1: I cry at nothing, and cry most of the time. 330 00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 1: Of course, I don't when John is here or anybody else, 331 00:20:36,040 --> 00:20:39,840 Speaker 1: but when I'm alone, and I am alone a good deal. 332 00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:42,880 Speaker 1: Just now. John is kept in town very often by 333 00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:45,800 Speaker 1: serious cases. And Jenny is good and lets me alone 334 00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:48,800 Speaker 1: when I want her to. So I walk a little 335 00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,320 Speaker 1: in the garden or down that lovely lane, sit on 336 00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:53,919 Speaker 1: the porch under the roses, and lie down up here. 337 00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,359 Speaker 1: A good deal. I'm getting really fond of the room, 338 00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:01,879 Speaker 1: in spite of the wallpaper. Perhaps because of the wallpaper, 339 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:06,879 Speaker 1: it dwells on my mind. So I lie here on 340 00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:10,199 Speaker 1: this great immovable bed. It is nailed down, I believe, 341 00:21:10,760 --> 00:21:13,800 Speaker 1: and follow that pattern about by the hour. It is 342 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:17,800 Speaker 1: as good as gymnastics, I assure you. I start, we'll say, 343 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:19,920 Speaker 1: at the bottom, down in the corner over there, where 344 00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,199 Speaker 1: it has not been touched. And I determined for the 345 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:25,879 Speaker 1: thousandth time that I will follow that pointless pattern to 346 00:21:25,880 --> 00:21:29,600 Speaker 1: some sort of conclusion. I know a little of the 347 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,439 Speaker 1: principle of design, and I know that this thing was 348 00:21:32,480 --> 00:21:35,480 Speaker 1: not arranged on any laws of radiation or alternation or 349 00:21:35,480 --> 00:21:38,720 Speaker 1: repetition or symmetry, or anything else I have ever heard of. 350 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:43,400 Speaker 1: It is repeated, of course by the breaths, but not 351 00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:47,840 Speaker 1: otherwise looked at. In one way, each breadth stands alone. 352 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:52,400 Speaker 1: The bloated curves and flourishes, a kind of debased Romanesque 353 00:21:52,440 --> 00:21:56,439 Speaker 1: with delirium. Tremends go waddling up and down in isolated 354 00:21:56,480 --> 00:22:01,120 Speaker 1: columns of fatuity. But on the other hand, they connect diagonally, 355 00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:04,720 Speaker 1: and the sprawling outlines run off in great slanting waves 356 00:22:04,760 --> 00:22:11,040 Speaker 1: of optic horror, like wallowing seaweeds in full chase. The 357 00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:14,600 Speaker 1: whole thing goes horizontally too, at least it seems so, 358 00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:17,640 Speaker 1: and I exhaust myself in trying to distinguish the order 359 00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:21,440 Speaker 1: of its going in that direction. They used to have 360 00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:24,280 Speaker 1: a horizontal breadth for a freeze, and that adds wonderfully 361 00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,480 Speaker 1: to the confusion. There is one end of the room 362 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:30,120 Speaker 1: where it is almost intact, and there where the cross 363 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:33,160 Speaker 1: lights fade and the low sun shines directly upon it. 364 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:38,000 Speaker 1: I can almost fancy radiation. After all, the interminable grotesques 365 00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:41,240 Speaker 1: seem to form around a common center and rush off 366 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:46,080 Speaker 1: in headlong plunges of equal distraction. It makes me tired 367 00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:49,679 Speaker 1: to follow it. It will take a nap. I guess 368 00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,560 Speaker 1: I don't know why I should write this. I don't 369 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,520 Speaker 1: want to. I don't feel able, and I know John 370 00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:00,720 Speaker 1: would think it absurd, but I must say what I 371 00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:03,760 Speaker 1: feel and think. In some way. It is such a relief, 372 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:06,879 Speaker 1: but the effort is getting to be greater than the 373 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:11,199 Speaker 1: relief half the time. Now I am awfully lazy and 374 00:23:11,280 --> 00:23:14,880 Speaker 1: lie down ever so much. John says I mustn't lose 375 00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:17,320 Speaker 1: my strength and has me take cod, liver oil and 376 00:23:17,560 --> 00:23:20,600 Speaker 1: lots of tonics and things, to say nothing of ale 377 00:23:20,680 --> 00:23:25,000 Speaker 1: and wine and rare meat. Dear John, he loves me 378 00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:28,359 Speaker 1: very dearly and hates to have me sick. I tried 379 00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:30,480 Speaker 1: to have a real, earnest, reasonable talk with him the 380 00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:32,840 Speaker 1: other day and tell him how I wish he would 381 00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:35,159 Speaker 1: let me go and make a visit to cousin Henry 382 00:23:35,160 --> 00:23:38,280 Speaker 1: and Julia. But he said I wasn't able to go, 383 00:23:38,480 --> 00:23:41,600 Speaker 1: nor able to stand it after I got there, and 384 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: I did not make out a very good case for myself, 385 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:47,480 Speaker 1: for I was crying before I had finished. It is 386 00:23:47,480 --> 00:23:49,879 Speaker 1: getting to be a great effort for me to think straight, 387 00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:54,479 Speaker 1: just this nervous weakness, I suppose, and dear John gathered 388 00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:56,760 Speaker 1: me up in his arms and just carried me upstairs 389 00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:59,080 Speaker 1: and laid me on the bed and sat by me 390 00:23:59,119 --> 00:24:02,280 Speaker 1: and read to me till it tired my head. He 391 00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:04,640 Speaker 1: said I was his darling and his comfort and all 392 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:07,000 Speaker 1: he had, and that I must take care of myself 393 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:10,320 Speaker 1: for his sake and keep well. He says, no one 394 00:24:10,359 --> 00:24:12,480 Speaker 1: but myself can help me out of it. That I 395 00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:15,000 Speaker 1: must use my will and self control and not let 396 00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:19,520 Speaker 1: any silly fancies run away from me. There's one comfort. 397 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,520 Speaker 1: The baby is well and happy and does not have 398 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:27,080 Speaker 1: to occupy this nursery with the horrid wallpaper. If we 399 00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:29,679 Speaker 1: had not used it, that blessed child would have. What 400 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,359 Speaker 1: a fortunate escape. Why I wouldn't have a child of mine, 401 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,680 Speaker 1: an impressionable little thing, live in such a room for worlds? 402 00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:39,800 Speaker 1: I never thought of it before, But it is lucky 403 00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:42,879 Speaker 1: that John kept me here. After all. I can stand 404 00:24:42,920 --> 00:24:46,560 Speaker 1: it so much easier than a baby, you see. Of course, 405 00:24:46,600 --> 00:24:48,760 Speaker 1: I never mention it to them any more. I am 406 00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,920 Speaker 1: too wise, but I keep watch of it all the same. 407 00:24:53,200 --> 00:24:55,720 Speaker 1: There are things in that paper nobody knows but me 408 00:24:56,480 --> 00:25:01,000 Speaker 1: or ever will behind the outside pattern. The dim shapes 409 00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:05,320 Speaker 1: get clearer every day. It is always the same shape, 410 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:09,800 Speaker 1: only very numerous, and it is like a woman stooping 411 00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:14,040 Speaker 1: down and creeping about behind that pattern. I don't like 412 00:25:14,080 --> 00:25:18,119 Speaker 1: it a bit. I wonder I begin to think I 413 00:25:18,160 --> 00:25:23,480 Speaker 1: wish John would take me away from here. And that's 414 00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:26,800 Speaker 1: the end of the first part of the Yellow Wallpaper. 415 00:25:27,080 --> 00:25:29,720 Speaker 1: And there's no way you could spoil it yourself by 416 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:33,240 Speaker 1: going and reading this thing. That's totally in the public domain. 417 00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:38,439 Speaker 1: You can find it on Project Gutenberg. But what's gonna happen. 418 00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:40,959 Speaker 1: You're gonna have to wait. You're gonna have to wait 419 00:25:41,000 --> 00:25:44,520 Speaker 1: till next Sunday for another episode of Cool Zone Media 420 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:47,879 Speaker 1: book Club. In the meantime, I'm your host and your reader, 421 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:50,840 Speaker 1: Margaret Kiljoy, and you can find me on if you 422 00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:52,919 Speaker 1: listen to this on It Could Happen Here Feed. You 423 00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:55,400 Speaker 1: can find me with my history podcast Cool People Who 424 00:25:55,440 --> 00:25:58,600 Speaker 1: Did Cool Stuff? And if you are listening to this 425 00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:01,160 Speaker 1: already on Cool People Who Did Cool Stuff, you can 426 00:26:01,160 --> 00:26:04,040 Speaker 1: listen to not Me when it could happen here. It's 427 00:26:04,080 --> 00:26:07,920 Speaker 1: all part of Cool Zone Media, which is what provides 428 00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:14,560 Speaker 1: you your book club. I'm just gonna press stop now. 429 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:17,880 Speaker 1: It Could Happen Here as a production of cool Zone Media. 430 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,680 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from cool Zone Media, visit our website 431 00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:23,800 Speaker 1: coolzonemedia dot com or check us out on the iHeartRadio app, 432 00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:27,200 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to podcasts. You can 433 00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:29,920 Speaker 1: find sources for It could Happen Here, updated monthly at 434 00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:33,200 Speaker 1: coolzonemedia dot com slash sources. Thanks for listening.