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Speaker 1: Lost Cultures. This is brought to you by the Forever

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Speaker 1: Dog podcast Network. Find us and other great podcasts at

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Speaker 1: www dot Forever dog Podcasts dot com. And if you're

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Speaker 1: loving what you're hearing, subscribe to us at Apple podcast

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Speaker 1: and w you're there, please write us a nice review

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Speaker 1: and give us a five star rating. Thank you all,

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Speaker 1: Thank you all. Dog Lost culture just calling well, cluck cluck, cluck,

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Speaker 1: cluckity cluck cluck. A couple of chickens welcome in this

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Speaker 1: little pen to feel like cluck it up. I feel

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Speaker 1: like a goddamn chicken. You know why? Why? Because I

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Speaker 1: feel cooped up? Because you feel cooped up. We'll fly

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Speaker 1: open the coop and start half flying out of it.

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Speaker 1: Because you know, chickens, they don't really fly as much

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Speaker 1: as they flap their wings and simply uh float off

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Speaker 1: the ground for fleeting moments. They can fly, And isn't

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Speaker 1: that kind of wonderful to think, you know, the chicken

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Speaker 1: they can't possibly have a very you know, long memory span,

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Speaker 1: so they remember lifting off the ground and realizing they

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Speaker 1: can fly, and then surely they forget what's just happened.

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Speaker 1: And there is, of course the flip side to that,

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Speaker 1: which is the crushing fear which must be coming to

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Speaker 1: your senses and plummeting to the ground. Yeah, I do

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Speaker 1: want to say, and not to play devil's advocate, but

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Speaker 1: there are some chickens out there. My late grandmother used

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Speaker 1: to run a farm and used to raise chickens, and

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Speaker 1: she was very good at that at raising chickens. But

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Speaker 1: one rooster pecked her in the ankle, and she bled

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Speaker 1: and she had a horrible wound. And then you know what,

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Speaker 1: that night she killed the chicken. She killed the rooster,

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Speaker 1: coached it for dinner. We all Yet it isn't that beautiful.

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Speaker 1: That's tragical. Tragical, Now that brings me to a story.

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Speaker 1: The word tragical bringing me to a story. Tragical is

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Speaker 1: not a word, but it might be. I had to

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Speaker 1: pretend it was a word. When I was in high school,

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Speaker 1: I was a lowly buss boy at the restaurant called

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Speaker 1: Nikki's on the Bay in Bayshore, Long Island, New York.

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Speaker 1: And the boss's daughter, that was this the boss that

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Speaker 1: you had sex with? On about I had sex with

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Speaker 1: his son. Oh my god, he took my virginity. His

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Speaker 1: name was Peter. No, okay, um, so, uh yeah, so

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Speaker 1: this is actually the guy who took my virginity sister.

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Speaker 1: That was the guy's the only restaurant's daughter. And she

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Speaker 1: was literally always pregnant. From the six years that I

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Speaker 1: worked there as a bus were like five, she literally pregnant.

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Speaker 1: She was like that woman who's always pregnant. And there

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Speaker 1: had been some like really like a terrible news story

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Speaker 1: and she comes in and we're all talking about it

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Speaker 1: and she's like, are you talking about this? Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: it's tragical. It is so tragical. It's tragical. And she

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Speaker 1: kept repeating it, almost like it was like comic the

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Speaker 1: way she kept repeating it, because it was so not

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Speaker 1: a word, and everyone knew it, like you would say

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Speaker 1: it's a tragedy or it's tragic, not it's tragical. I mean,

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Speaker 1: but she kept repainting, and oh boy, it was funny.

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Speaker 1: I do want to just and I don't mean to

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Speaker 1: correct you. Tragical is, in fact a word according to

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Speaker 1: the dictionary. Um, what is the definition? It's just like

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Speaker 1: how ironical is a word, but you wouldn't read yes, guarantee.

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Speaker 1: I mean, is it like how booty delicious is a word?

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Speaker 1: Because it became like, no, it's not a thing you guys, Um,

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Speaker 1: please culturally stist listeners chime in, because I mean, you

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Speaker 1: can just fact check this. It's pretty discreet. Yeah. I

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Speaker 1: mentioned it in your Radar review, mentioned it in your rate. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mentioned in your review. Guys. You know what's not

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Speaker 1: tragical the fact that our guest is here with us tonight.

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Speaker 1: It is not tragical. In fact, it's a triumph. It's

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Speaker 1: a triumph. It's a triumphal Oh, let's go through the credits, baby, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: let's do it. Okay, And god, you know what, the

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Speaker 1: the credits we're talking to you, God, are an embarrassment

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Speaker 1: of riches. Dear God, Um, here we go. She's got

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Speaker 1: her Comedy Central half hour September nine. It's going to

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Speaker 1: be fantastic. Which guess what is like this week? It's

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Speaker 1: this week and you might have seen clips of it

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Speaker 1: on Comedy Central's socials. Um, it's so funny already. I

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Speaker 1: can't wait to watch. And her album she just recorded,

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Speaker 1: uh a union hall for two performances, she's got, She's

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Speaker 1: got lots of options to cut her together the best.

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Speaker 1: Not to say that both nights weren't the best. You know,

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Speaker 1: it's really good to have. It was in the same night,

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Speaker 1: but it was different shows. Even if you're a famous

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Speaker 1: end of like Kevin Hard or Amy Schumer, you need

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Speaker 1: those options, honey. And she's of course a phenomenal writer

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Speaker 1: on the Tonight Show starring Jimmy Fallon, she's um performer.

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Speaker 1: You've seen her star turns as miss Backup Ohio. I mean, god, run,

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Speaker 1: don't want look those up? So funny, And of course

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Speaker 1: she is. She was the erstwhile host of Doctor Game

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Speaker 1: Show on WFMU. But now it's making a glorious return

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Speaker 1: on Your Wolf. We're so excited. It's it's truly one

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Speaker 1: of the most fantasmical, tragic, non tragical, triumphal non tragical. Also,

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Speaker 1: you've probably just seen the knowing our guests from being

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Speaker 1: like True New York like Live show icon Queen of

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Speaker 1: New York as Josh Sharp Ward call her and she

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Speaker 1: refuses the title, and that's how you know. Guys, please

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Speaker 1: welcome Joe. This is a joyous moment. I think that

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Speaker 1: was really a build up. Yeah, I just did. I

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Speaker 1: wanted to mention you had a restaurant for I had

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Speaker 1: a restaurant story thanks to work in a restaurant, and um,

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Speaker 1: there was this guy there that was a cook and

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Speaker 1: he was like so gross and he was dating the

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Speaker 1: hostess but he would like grab us and touch us

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Speaker 1: all the time because the hostess didn't know what was

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Speaker 1: happening in the kitchen. And he was like just like

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Speaker 1: this really bad guy. And he always like was he

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Speaker 1: was always drunk, and he just was a gross guy.

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Speaker 1: And one time he had he was really skinny everywhere

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Speaker 1: except for he had a belly. He had skinny arms,

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Speaker 1: skinny legs, skinny at, skinny neck, big belly. You know

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Speaker 1: what that is alcohol And so so then one of

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Speaker 1: the one of the waiters was like, hey, man, no,

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Speaker 1: why do you let a skinny body but just like

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Speaker 1: a big fat belly and he goes he's you don't

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Speaker 1: want to know his comeback. His comeback was at midnight,

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Speaker 1: this pumpkin turns into a big old dick. So the

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Speaker 1: lot of thing there is my stomach turns into a cocky,

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Speaker 1: fucking asshole asking another question also midnight, like it's some

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Speaker 1: Cinde story. At midnight each night, my belly turns into

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Speaker 1: a dick that's really zinged it in for a laugh.

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Speaker 1: They're restaurants are gross places. Gross. Literally everything about them grows.

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Speaker 1: The people that were there gross gross. The things that

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Speaker 1: happened with the food behind the scenes gross, so gross.

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Speaker 1: I remember when I was cater I used to eat

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Speaker 1: the eat the people's wedding nights, and I was acting

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Speaker 1: like a rat, you know, just shoveling any kind of

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Speaker 1: hot order, hot oor derves. But you know what, weddings,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to say, pretty hit or miss with the food. Oh,

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Speaker 1: they're always miss when you had a hit, I'm going

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Speaker 1: to say, And she might be listening to this. No oh,

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Speaker 1: no oh, no oh no, I was gonna say my

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Speaker 1: sister wedding, some of the or dervs were I was

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Speaker 1: a little under round. But then the entrees were the

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Speaker 1: main courses were delicious. I feel the opposite most of

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Speaker 1: the time. Der that's where they really put kar into it,

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Speaker 1: and the entree it's just a slop. Bo okay. You

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Speaker 1: know what always crushes it for me the cocktail party

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Speaker 1: when the girls and the guys are walking around with

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Speaker 1: the trays and they like they're like little hot meat pa,

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Speaker 1: and you're like absolute and they're like a little pick

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Speaker 1: in a blanket. And you're like when like always nailing

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Speaker 1: it with like the things that are being carried around

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Speaker 1: on trees, and then when you sit down, people always

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Speaker 1: fail to keep it simple. And this is so funny

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Speaker 1: because it's actually rule number thirty eight of culture, which

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Speaker 1: is at weddings, keep it simple. Okay. The problem is though,

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Speaker 1: that by the time you sit down at a wedding,

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Speaker 1: you've eating like six the equivalent of six hat do. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's true. But here's the thing. Always it's like would

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Speaker 1: you like the bula base or the fucking steak on

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Speaker 1: the cart or whatever. It's never like what I'm saying

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Speaker 1: is you gotta do your chicken or fish. That's it.

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Speaker 1: That's why you know what. I will defend airplane food

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Speaker 1: till the day I fucking die in one sense because

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Speaker 1: it's they keep it simple. They don't and they keep

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Speaker 1: it fresh, so they don't. What airline are you flying?

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Speaker 1: I want to bump up to that. Honestly, you guys,

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Speaker 1: honest to goodness, and we're speaking to God right now.

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Speaker 1: This is for you, God, Koreer and airlines they have

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Speaker 1: make your own beeping box. They don't make it, where

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Speaker 1: do you make it? They give you a bowl of rice. No,

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Speaker 1: they don't. They give you the toppings and the sauces

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Speaker 1: and they go to jong and you mix it yourself

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Speaker 1: and it's like a fucking Chipotle burritable in the sky, baby,

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Speaker 1: and it's delicious. Korean airlines go to Korea. Okay, so

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Speaker 1: let me walk this back. They give you the ingredients

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Speaker 1: that you're to use. It's like make your own meal

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Speaker 1: and you don't have to put everything in it. Oh,

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Speaker 1: I guess that's true. That's true. And and I will

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Speaker 1: always love a disgusting beef meal in an aluminium tray

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Speaker 1: on an airplane. I don't know. I feel like I'm

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Speaker 1: at war, honestly. Maybe it's just because I've literally never

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Speaker 1: been served real food on an airplane. You know. Sometimes

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Speaker 1: they do make it hot, That's what I'm saying. I

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Speaker 1: like the hot food, so hot to the point where

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Speaker 1: it's not supposed to be eating yet, but you eat

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Speaker 1: it because your senses are off because you're in the sky.

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, you get that, Like your brain starts

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Speaker 1: to melt and you're like eat this, yes, yeah. Like

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Speaker 1: you're like people in the in the airports at like

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Speaker 1: four in the morning, they'll be eating like a pizza,

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Speaker 1: because it's just like, like, why are you eating that?

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Speaker 1: Why are you eating combos? Like I don't know, it's breakfast.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. It doesn't make any since what's the

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Speaker 1: longest fight you've been on? I don't know. I don't

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Speaker 1: go in long I don't know if I've been on

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Speaker 1: a lung. Have you been to Europe ever? Yeah, I

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Speaker 1: guess I've been to Europe. Well, I would consider that

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Speaker 1: must be it must be Europe must be, must be,

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Speaker 1: Europe must be. Forgot to say that when we went

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Speaker 1: through what was that, babe, uh right, France rights Frans.

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Speaker 1: I'm not saying that the cool way France or whatever.

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Speaker 1: I used to when I was at cater I used

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Speaker 1: to um serve these things that were very popular, um

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Speaker 1: and they didn't realize I guess they didn't realize. But

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Speaker 1: they named them chicken blue balls, and it was like

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Speaker 1: a chicken cord of blue bite. But oh my god, chicken,

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Speaker 1: they know, they don't him that. Now I want to ask,

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Speaker 1: because I feel like you're catering past life is so

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Speaker 1: woven into your tapestry, into your history job don't and

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Speaker 1: so tell us would you ever consider revisiting it and okay,

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Speaker 1: all right, well that's a show. I'm just down, like,

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Speaker 1: would you create a show a show around one woman show? No? No, no,

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Speaker 1: don't no. I mean but Joe is so invented with

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Speaker 1: her show premises. Oh no, we can't do it. Catering.

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Speaker 1: I remember one time I got a text. I was

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Speaker 1: at a catering job, and I hated catering so much

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Speaker 1: because they always put me on bathroom duty. What just

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Speaker 1: because of my personality? And bathroom duty at a catering

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Speaker 1: job cleaning him up? Because your personality? What does that?

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Speaker 1: What does that mean? Week? They find the weak people,

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Speaker 1: and I say, do the worst thing you Okay, but

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Speaker 1: listen they the thing is about Katie. I remember one

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Speaker 1: time I got a text, you know, I got a

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Speaker 1: Facebook message and it was it was hey, congratulations, And

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Speaker 1: I thought that it wasn't that I tried out for

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Speaker 1: it anything or applied for anything. But I thought that

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Speaker 1: I had got my big break. And I thought that

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Speaker 1: I could just run out of there, like rip off

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Speaker 1: my uniform, run out the door. And I found out

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Speaker 1: it was to someone else. Wasn't going to be anything?

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Speaker 1: Are you at liberty to say to who it was

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Speaker 1: meant to go to or from who it was sent.

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Speaker 1: I think it was from this comedian named Tyler, and

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Speaker 1: I forget who it was. To have the art coves

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Speaker 1: anymore without Facebook, I have it delete after two weeks

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Speaker 1: my text what really to save room and also like

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Speaker 1: to forget even like with Bowen with addresses unfortunately. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but that's probably one of the reasons why I have

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Speaker 1: to sleep and save room is because me and her

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Speaker 1: go back and forth and sack forth and back forth

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Speaker 1: and back, back and forth and fourth and back. That's

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Speaker 1: rual number seventy. Yeah, you text, you better go back

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Speaker 1: back and forth and fourth and back. But no, I was.

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Speaker 1: I was almost to and fro for the kids. I

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Speaker 1: almost did that today because I was trying to save

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Speaker 1: it from my phone and I was like, should I

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Speaker 1: just do that setting? Should I just make the leap?

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Speaker 1: You won't miss the old duck, I know, because I never.

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Speaker 1: I never go back for posterity, you know, but maybe will.

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Speaker 1: But I want to get into this with Joe. Joe.

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Speaker 1: I think for some reason, your absence on Facebook is

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Speaker 1: the most felt for me, and I'm constantly as more time,

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Speaker 1: no stop, let me finish as more as time and

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Speaker 1: time passes as time passes and passes as time as

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Speaker 1: passes time and time passed a real song, and then

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Speaker 1: it could be it could be I go Joe this

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Speaker 1: and you Oh I thought it was. I believe in

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Speaker 1: Miss Joe like she's a fortune teller. As time and

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Speaker 1: time passes, I believe I missed Joe right right right.

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Speaker 1: So the hook is un fast book on fast book.

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Speaker 1: Oh see, I'm Facebook with Facebook because something about hot

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Speaker 1: music nowadays, it's also sible. I had a dream, I

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Speaker 1: was sipping whiskey. Neat. That's all you got to say

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Speaker 1: for a whole song. Put put something beat under that

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Speaker 1: headed dream whiskey literal melody. I'm sorry, not sorry. You

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Speaker 1: heard that one. Screaming screaming like an eagle. That's what

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Speaker 1: she does, screaming eagle gets notes every two hours, that dummy.

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Speaker 1: It's amazing that she can still say I she will,

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Speaker 1: she will her, she will shoot out her chords in

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Speaker 1: the next year. You don't think it would have happened already.

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Speaker 1: She had the song on her last album called for You,

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Speaker 1: and she she got into it. Well, there's just one part.

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Speaker 1: I mean, like the chorus its office, which is nuts.

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Speaker 1: But then but then up to the up to the bridge,

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Speaker 1: she goes fucking insane and she goes um and so

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Speaker 1: the chorus ends it nothing at all, and then in

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Speaker 1: the second time she does the course, she ends in

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Speaker 1: with it to It's so. There was a song, there's

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Speaker 1: a song called stone Cold that she did live on

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Speaker 1: the Saturday Night Live and it was like and she's

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Speaker 1: wiving her tits off, like so so hot, and it

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Speaker 1: was like everyone was like, oh oh, and Facebook afterwards

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Speaker 1: was oh, josh our bafterwards, I was like, oh, Demmick

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Speaker 1: you she was screaming her little ass. She was scrolled

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Speaker 1: saying her ass. But I do love Demi And guess

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Speaker 1: is so good. Whenever I'm not sorry, it's really it's

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Speaker 1: really good. And whenever I have to do something stressful,

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Speaker 1: I listen to them. It's so it's feeling so bad

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Speaker 1: and feelings so good. Do you know, like the beat

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Speaker 1: comes in and out of sorry not sorry, No that's

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Speaker 1: not true. Yeah, yeah, yeah, reveal when this happens. When

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Speaker 1: it's like that, when the man comes in, which man,

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Speaker 1: it's like, um, baby, do you know what I'm talking about? Okay, wait,

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Speaker 1: how's the beginning going. It's like it's like I look

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Speaker 1: good at what is it? The beginning of the song,

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Speaker 1: it's like baby, yeah, yeah, see now I'm out here baby.

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Speaker 1: But she's right. The beat goes out, he goes during

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Speaker 1: Wait a minute, because a minute. That's so true, Joe.

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Speaker 1: I'm so sorry I doubted. We should never have done that.

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Speaker 1: Should never we should never have done never ended. Um, Joe,

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Speaker 1: let's at We're gonna ask you what we ask all

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Speaker 1: of our guests. Yeah, because now I'm really interested. I've

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Speaker 1: always been before in Joe's cultural upbringing. In Joe, the

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Speaker 1: question we will ask you is, what was the culture

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Speaker 1: that made you say? Cultures? For me, I want to

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Speaker 1: step in a cultural direction, truly formative, formative. So I

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Speaker 1: wasn't really allowed to watch many movies growing up, Like

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Speaker 1: we were allowed to rent a movie like once every

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Speaker 1: two weeks. Yes, this is because why we didn't have cable.

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Speaker 1: I don't my dad just didn't think it was worth it, Okay,

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Speaker 1: and um, and so we my brother would always choose

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Speaker 1: Death Becomes Her And so I watched that over and

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Speaker 1: over again. And then but I got to go over

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Speaker 1: to my friend at Dina's house, and we watched over there.

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Speaker 1: We watched uh, We alternated between Rackul Horror Picture Show

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Speaker 1: and Blue Lagoon, which is where we saw our first penis.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, there's a full penis in it. Blue Lagoon?

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Speaker 1: Is that with Brookshields? Yes, and Mr Feenie and tell

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Speaker 1: you something by the time this episode releases tomorrow, So

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Speaker 1: it's not something you guys can come to now because

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Speaker 1: it will already happened, have happened when you guys hear this.

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Speaker 1: But I'm like the sidekick from Night Late with Brookshields,

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Speaker 1: and I've never met Brookshelves. I don't know what's about

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Speaker 1: to happen, but you're going to have to riff off

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Speaker 1: of her. How did her How did she choose you?

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Speaker 1: I don't think she did. I think I was suggested

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Speaker 1: by someone that she must have. No, I think she

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Speaker 1: might have chosen She must have chosen you, because she

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Speaker 1: must have Here's what happened a bit okay, because celebrities,

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Speaker 1: you know, they like to pick. But I think what

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Speaker 1: happened is that they the producers at Night Late, were like,

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Speaker 1: you could choose this person, this person, and this person.

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Speaker 1: Here are their videos, and she was like, I'm in

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Speaker 1: love with Matt Rodge because you know she had to

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Speaker 1: feel passionately for you to be yes. All right, Well,

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Speaker 1: the first question I'll ask her tomorrow is, Hi, I

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Speaker 1: thought it was going to be. Have you seen my work?

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Speaker 1: I think you're going to become best friends. You're gonna

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Speaker 1: get free latinos. Honestly, I will make it my golden

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Speaker 1: befriend her. I think I'll try to get her on

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Speaker 1: the bod. You're going to get get her on the pody.

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Speaker 1: Can you imagine if we interviewed Brookshields of Blue Lagoon, God,

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Speaker 1: Spin City, Spin City, what was the show that was like,

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Speaker 1: it was the same, Um, it's not. It wasn't news radio.

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Speaker 1: It was David Spade was a boss. Don't shoot me,

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Speaker 1: dot shoot me. No, she wasn't on that, Oh God,

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Speaker 1: were suddenly suddenly Susan Okay, I mean Blue Lagoon suddenly

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Speaker 1: Susan She sus lipstick Jungle. Of course. Wait, I feel

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Speaker 1: bad because you literally it feels like faith that you

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Speaker 1: said that, because that's literally happening. So I hadn't mentioned.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, I'll let you guys know how it goes.

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Speaker 1: Please do um, but continue, So you would go over

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Speaker 1: and you'd watch Rocky Horror and Blue Lagoon and rotationally,

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Speaker 1: and you would be also frequently watching death because and

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Speaker 1: so I watched these movies over and over and over,

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Speaker 1: And would you like get something out of them every time?

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Speaker 1: Or was it just like something that just it became

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Speaker 1: someone green in your memory? That's me out of it

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Speaker 1: every time every time? Amazing? What are those things you

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Speaker 1: got out of it? Like different understandings of what the

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Speaker 1: penis was, and different understandings of sexuality, because it was

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Speaker 1: just like because I remember it was like at first

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Speaker 1: we were really afraid of regular Picture Show and then

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Speaker 1: we were like we understand right, we're you know, so

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Speaker 1: are you a kind of person? Are you the kind

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Speaker 1: of rocky horror person who will go to a screening? Have?

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Speaker 1: I only been one screening? But I liked it a lot.

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Speaker 1: I like those screenings where people engage. Yeah, you know,

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Speaker 1: did you dress up? No? I'm not a big fan

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Speaker 1: of costumes. I understand why other people like them, right,

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Speaker 1: you know what I miss? I missed the room screenings.

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Speaker 1: I feel like you don't. Yeah, they don't do it.

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Speaker 1: They were doing it for a while, like three years ago. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they were happening a lot. They even did. We're in college.

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Speaker 1: We were in college and they did them, but they

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Speaker 1: I would go freshman year. It was very funny, and

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Speaker 1: the first time is always so funny, and then the

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Speaker 1: second time you're like, I know what's happening. In the

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Speaker 1: third time you're like, I gotta go. You can. But

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Speaker 1: have you guys heard about the new movie The Disaster

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Speaker 1: Artist that James Franco directed, so he plays Tommy Was.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh this is about to come out, and

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Speaker 1: it's apparently it's hilarious. So it's a biopic essentially of

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Speaker 1: Tommy Was and his creating of the room. Maybe the

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Speaker 1: biopic is the wrong word. It's it's a depiction of

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Speaker 1: the creation of the room. And James Franco plays Tommy Was.

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Speaker 1: Dave Franco plays Greg sss like the best friend who's

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Speaker 1: in the movie. And I think Alison Bree is also

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Speaker 1: in it. Um it was the hilarious actress who plays

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Speaker 1: the blonde girl in the movie. She also was in

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Speaker 1: Brookshields Brookshields. No, I feel bad. I'm gonna find out

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Speaker 1: who who she is later and I'll say, but she's

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Speaker 1: a grainer um and like lots of cameos too, so

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Speaker 1: um gotta. But apparently it just premiered at, like I guess,

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Speaker 1: the Toronto International Film Festival. It was like a huge hit,

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Speaker 1: like everyone thought it was the most hilarious thing ever.

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Speaker 1: I can't wait to see it. UM, But I just

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Speaker 1: just just to get back to Joe's culture. UM. Now

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Speaker 1: has this informed how? How would you say this has

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Speaker 1: informed you now? As an adult? UM? And an adult?

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Speaker 1: An adult? An adult, I think that I like, UM,

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Speaker 1: I used to you know, another culture I used to

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Speaker 1: really enjoy. I used to want to, UM. I used

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Speaker 1: to want to own a candy shop. That's what I

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Speaker 1: wanted to do when I grew up, either that or

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Speaker 1: celebrity psychiatrist. And UM I was I realized I just

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Speaker 1: wanted to do something that was like like frivolous and

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Speaker 1: like didn't canny does kind of hurt people, But I

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Speaker 1: just wanted to do something that was like made people

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Speaker 1: feel good in the room. And I guess that's kind

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Speaker 1: of what I try to do now, even though sometimes

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Speaker 1: I get a little angry or now, I think stand

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Speaker 1: up comedy has brought out an edge in me that

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Speaker 1: makes me hateful and scared of people. Know it rounds

403
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:26,360
Speaker 1: you out, I would say it rounds out the other

404
00:23:26,440 --> 00:23:30,080
Speaker 1: facets of your personality. Maybe because because you know, you

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00:23:30,200 --> 00:23:32,920
Speaker 1: balance out the joy making in a small room with

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Speaker 1: the hatefulness. I guess so I do find it made

407
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Speaker 1: me become a bad person. I've never seen you ever

408
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:43,520
Speaker 1: once be hateful or angry. I agree. I have seen

409
00:23:43,560 --> 00:23:46,200
Speaker 1: you get flustered. I never even seen you get flustered.

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00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:50,240
Speaker 1: I'm always flustered. I'm flustered right now. But I was

411
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Speaker 1: I like, I was at a show in l A.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, I was saying a joke and

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Speaker 1: it was like a sex joke and nobody was laughing. Uh.

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Speaker 1: And I was like, I said the words, what are

415
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Speaker 1: y'all virgins? And I thought, what's happened to me? You

416
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Speaker 1: believed that you should say that in the moment, and

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Speaker 1: the moment I was like, I know what'll get them?

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00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,919
Speaker 1: And it's like, what the hell's what? What if they

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Speaker 1: are virgins? You know, like something, Yeah, but what if

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00:24:19,800 --> 00:24:22,960
Speaker 1: it's a religious group coming in wanting to see comedy

421
00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:25,040
Speaker 1: for the first time? They say in the front row,

422
00:24:25,119 --> 00:24:28,600
Speaker 1: and I said, what are y'all virgins? And they were like, yeah,

423
00:24:29,840 --> 00:24:32,120
Speaker 1: we are. We're waiting for the love of our life.

424
00:24:32,520 --> 00:24:35,239
Speaker 1: It just made me turn into a bad You think

425
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:38,320
Speaker 1: comedies made you guys bad? Yes, Um, I think it's

426
00:24:39,119 --> 00:24:45,960
Speaker 1: exposed me to horrors. I've if anything comedy is just

427
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:53,400
Speaker 1: flipped flipped my own underbelly. Yeah, so I'm seeing parts

428
00:24:53,480 --> 00:24:55,359
Speaker 1: of myself I don't like. Yeah, maybe it's not that

429
00:24:55,560 --> 00:24:59,200
Speaker 1: it's like turning you bad, but it exposes It's like

430
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:02,960
Speaker 1: when you lift up that like the drain, you know, cover,

431
00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:05,360
Speaker 1: and you're like, oh my god, that's where the animals live.

432
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,440
Speaker 1: Right well, I guess to be totally serious about it,

433
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:11,119
Speaker 1: it's like what's funny is like the truth, and the

434
00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:13,280
Speaker 1: truth is not always like a cool thing to find

435
00:25:13,359 --> 00:25:15,480
Speaker 1: out about yourself or other people and stuff like that.

436
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:18,960
Speaker 1: And I would imagine like working in late night right

437
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:21,680
Speaker 1: now is frustrating because you have to react to a

438
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:25,240
Speaker 1: lot of truth and truth is bad. Truth. The truth

439
00:25:25,320 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 1: right now is bad. I know there's only one news

440
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 1: story every day that's like whale escapes from zoo, and

441
00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:35,880
Speaker 1: it's like the rest of it is horrified. And even

442
00:25:35,960 --> 00:25:38,800
Speaker 1: the whale escaping from the zoo could have die or consequences.

443
00:25:38,920 --> 00:25:41,240
Speaker 1: I mean, what's the whale state of mind? Who's around?

444
00:25:41,600 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 1: Where did it escape to? Like did it escape to

445
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:47,280
Speaker 1: some place where there's so many questions. Right, there's no,

446
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:50,480
Speaker 1: there's not there. I mean, maybe there was never fun news.

447
00:25:50,840 --> 00:25:54,159
Speaker 1: Maybe there was never ever fun news. That's that actually

448
00:25:54,280 --> 00:25:58,000
Speaker 1: is comforting. No. I remember as a kid, as a kid,

449
00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,840
Speaker 1: when I would watch the news, they'd be like, um,

450
00:26:01,359 --> 00:26:03,680
Speaker 1: nothing like no crime, blah blah blah blah blah. And

451
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,360
Speaker 1: then they'd be like, oh, just so you know, there's

452
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,440
Speaker 1: razors in your soup and in your noodles and in

453
00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:10,159
Speaker 1: your cookies. And it's like, oh, just like, even if

454
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,320
Speaker 1: there isn't something to be afraid of, the news will

455
00:26:12,320 --> 00:26:13,959
Speaker 1: be like, there's something to be afraid, but right now

456
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:16,840
Speaker 1: there is even even razors in your soup. Is like,

457
00:26:18,359 --> 00:26:20,320
Speaker 1: you know, I'd rather take that for sure. Can I'd

458
00:26:20,440 --> 00:26:22,760
Speaker 1: rather there be a guarantee that if you order a

459
00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:26,040
Speaker 1: soup as a razor then have trump. Yeah, I'd rather

460
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:31,160
Speaker 1: have for sure? Can I say something? And this is yeah,

461
00:26:31,200 --> 00:26:34,480
Speaker 1: this is this is a Joe memory. And I feel like,

462
00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 1: you know, years from now, we'll remember the people we

463
00:26:36,800 --> 00:26:39,000
Speaker 1: were with the day of the election, the day after

464
00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:41,040
Speaker 1: the election, and I would extend that to the week

465
00:26:41,119 --> 00:26:43,480
Speaker 1: of the election and the week of the election, I

466
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:47,320
Speaker 1: was supposed to. I went on Joe's uh now may

467
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:51,119
Speaker 1: she rest her show dedications on w M at w

468
00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:53,560
Speaker 1: fm U. It was it was very fun. I was

469
00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:55,320
Speaker 1: very excited to do it, and then this and then

470
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 1: on November eight, November nine, Trump got elected, but I

471
00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:02,000
Speaker 1: was still supposed to go in the following week, UM

472
00:27:02,119 --> 00:27:05,400
Speaker 1: and Joe UM was just like, Hey, it's just gonna

473
00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:08,119
Speaker 1: be really it's gonna be really rough, but come in anyway,

474
00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:10,760
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna make this show all Selene Dion songs.

475
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 1: And I was like, you know what this is. It

476
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 1: was one of the first uplifting It was one of

477
00:27:15,080 --> 00:27:17,880
Speaker 1: the first moments in the week or in the aftermath,

478
00:27:17,920 --> 00:27:20,640
Speaker 1: and I was like, Okay, there are still these little

479
00:27:20,680 --> 00:27:24,680
Speaker 1: touchstones like Selene, like Joe, like her like dedications. And

480
00:27:24,760 --> 00:27:26,600
Speaker 1: so we went on. We did We did all Selene songs.

481
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:29,280
Speaker 1: People called in, UM, a couple of people I think

482
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:31,840
Speaker 1: justin Linville called in and was like genuinely scared about

483
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:34,600
Speaker 1: what the election meant. And we and Joe and I

484
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:35,960
Speaker 1: just had to be like had to like tow the

485
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:39,000
Speaker 1: line between being like fun and silly and talking about

486
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,399
Speaker 1: silly things but also like, oh, but the world is

487
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 1: really bad. And that was just like freshly like the

488
00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:45,480
Speaker 1: world is bad and like I feel like now like

489
00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 1: whenever someone says that, it's like, yeah, of course it is.

490
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:52,120
Speaker 1: But back then mid mid November was like a cool

491
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:55,200
Speaker 1: novel thing to say. But anyway, Joe was Joe was

492
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 1: the beacon and was the beacon. That's not how I

493
00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:59,600
Speaker 1: would have handled that, Okay, I would have said to

494
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:01,919
Speaker 1: that first, calling in scared, I would have said, well,

495
00:28:01,960 --> 00:28:04,800
Speaker 1: that's not what this show. We're picking our favorites ley

496
00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:10,120
Speaker 1: Indian songs. So I'm sorry that you're scared. Um eventually

497
00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:13,000
Speaker 1: it's a member of the company community, you see again. Yeah,

498
00:28:13,040 --> 00:28:16,440
Speaker 1: it's just like, I'm sorry that you're afraid. I mean,

499
00:28:16,560 --> 00:28:17,879
Speaker 1: this is not what the show is. And we do

500
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,080
Speaker 1: have a we're gonna you know, we don't have so

501
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:24,119
Speaker 1: much time, so I don't know. But here's a question,

502
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 1: and I'm sorry. Did you guys hear that Justin wants

503
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:33,320
Speaker 1: flew to He flew to the Dallas for airport because

504
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:35,880
Speaker 1: he was craving what a burger which is a which

505
00:28:35,920 --> 00:28:39,040
Speaker 1: is a burger chain in the South. You gotta be kidding.

506
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:41,440
Speaker 1: But he gets free flights because his mother works for

507
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,120
Speaker 1: one of the airlines and so he gets free flights

508
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:47,000
Speaker 1: and he was really craving water burger and Joe Joe

509
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: told me the story and it was shocking. The same

510
00:28:50,840 --> 00:28:53,440
Speaker 1: day after the meal, my dad once we were we

511
00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:56,280
Speaker 1: were we were in and um, we were in a

512
00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:59,280
Speaker 1: all you can eat sea food restaurant outside of Orlando.

513
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:02,000
Speaker 1: You could have oh you can eat lobster tails, and

514
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:04,320
Speaker 1: we're having such a good time that my dad said,

515
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 1: you know what, it's almost worth it to fly here

516
00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:11,440
Speaker 1: for this and fly back. It's almost worth it. And

517
00:29:11,560 --> 00:29:15,960
Speaker 1: he was fully convinced. We never did it, but I

518
00:29:16,280 --> 00:29:18,880
Speaker 1: was like, I wanted to really push him on and

519
00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, if you say, let's do it,

520
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,800
Speaker 1: is to come down next Thursday night. Is your dad

521
00:29:24,840 --> 00:29:28,920
Speaker 1: as good energy as you? He's He's good energy. He's

522
00:29:28,960 --> 00:29:32,280
Speaker 1: bridg is good energy. Um, he is. I would say

523
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:36,880
Speaker 1: the better energy is my mother. They're both good energy,

524
00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 1: but my dad's good energy. I would say my dad

525
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:43,160
Speaker 1: can his his like temper and frustrations can act up

526
00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 1: in a way that my mother's do not sure my

527
00:29:45,560 --> 00:29:47,719
Speaker 1: mother has like I think out of the three six

528
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:49,800
Speaker 1: five days a year, I think she's got has like

529
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 1: four or five bad days she she's a very kind

530
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,520
Speaker 1: of resiliant, positive person. And my dad, I see get

531
00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 1: like frustrated and his temper gets the better of him

532
00:30:00,040 --> 00:30:03,640
Speaker 1: more than my mother. So yeah, but but he is

533
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:06,880
Speaker 1: eight out of ten days or you know, nine out

534
00:30:06,880 --> 00:30:09,600
Speaker 1: at ten days in a good mood, I think. But

535
00:30:09,760 --> 00:30:12,600
Speaker 1: like there's moments during the day where it's like, well,

536
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:15,480
Speaker 1: do you mean this is happening? I'm not ridiculous. Um.

537
00:30:15,880 --> 00:30:20,680
Speaker 1: He came up to me one time and said, I'm

538
00:30:20,720 --> 00:30:24,040
Speaker 1: not gonna do his voice. He goes phone in, Um,

539
00:30:24,600 --> 00:30:28,600
Speaker 1: your Instagram is really is really something else. You're out

540
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:34,360
Speaker 1: of your goddamn mind. And I was like one time

541
00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 1: he saw my he saw our friend Dave Mazzoni, and

542
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:40,000
Speaker 1: we had just done a promotional picture for Papa Roulette,

543
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:42,000
Speaker 1: and on the back of it you saw Dave's butt,

544
00:30:42,840 --> 00:30:46,600
Speaker 1: and my dad to Dave's face, goes, that's a big

545
00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:51,440
Speaker 1: as you got a big ass. You don't think about

546
00:30:51,440 --> 00:30:53,920
Speaker 1: it when you see it and not out. But then yeah,

547
00:30:53,920 --> 00:30:57,400
Speaker 1: I got a big and I saw Dave's eyes just

548
00:30:57,520 --> 00:31:01,280
Speaker 1: like I saw him, like just like us out speaking

549
00:31:01,360 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 1: of asses, speaking of asses, And this is something I

550
00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:06,320
Speaker 1: literally thought of today, Joe, and I didn't even put

551
00:31:06,400 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 1: this just connect the dots that I was seeing you tonight.

552
00:31:09,600 --> 00:31:12,760
Speaker 1: But I put on I put on some underwear. I

553
00:31:12,920 --> 00:31:15,760
Speaker 1: felt my ass and I was like, I I think

554
00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:17,600
Speaker 1: I'm like Joe Firestone and that I don't have an

555
00:31:17,640 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: ass either. Joe has a joke in her in her

556
00:31:19,960 --> 00:31:23,000
Speaker 1: half hour about her not having a butt, which which

557
00:31:23,040 --> 00:31:26,800
Speaker 1: I don't think is necessarily true. I don't think it's

558
00:31:26,800 --> 00:31:28,560
Speaker 1: like a flat I don't think it's a straight drop.

559
00:31:29,280 --> 00:31:31,440
Speaker 1: And then my legs indent, so like that's how you know,

560
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 1: but the the indent means that there's something there. No,

561
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:40,080
Speaker 1: it's like the residue from my back, like the back

562
00:31:40,200 --> 00:31:45,320
Speaker 1: extends and maybe it's some kind of tail memory and

563
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:49,920
Speaker 1: then it goes it's like a cliff that goes into

564
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 1: the like I don't I don't think so, like I

565
00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:54,640
Speaker 1: have two dimensions to my body and it's back and

566
00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:57,200
Speaker 1: leg and there's but I'm sorry that you don't have

567
00:31:57,280 --> 00:32:00,640
Speaker 1: a but it's really it's butts are in right now?

568
00:32:00,680 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 1: How do you deal with it? I don't know. I

569
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:06,680
Speaker 1: was thinking about getting those pants that um not your

570
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:11,280
Speaker 1: mama's jeans. You know, these aren't your mama's jeans. These

571
00:32:11,280 --> 00:32:13,600
Speaker 1: aren't your flat asked mama's jeans. Let me tell you

572
00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 1: your mom with that flat ass and her stupid jeans,

573
00:32:17,120 --> 00:32:21,680
Speaker 1: and are adding Yeah. I think it's like the way

574
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:27,840
Speaker 1: it's stitched. It's really tight. You loose as dumb stuff.

575
00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 1: I feel like it must press the kings apart. So

576
00:32:33,400 --> 00:32:38,320
Speaker 1: you do silent farts. We all know the trick that's

577
00:32:38,360 --> 00:32:42,040
Speaker 1: never worked. You're pulling apart and it's just like you're

578
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 1: if you're trying to be discreet and fart silently, why

579
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:48,720
Speaker 1: would you take your both of your hands and pull

580
00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 1: apart your button? I do. I do it literally day where.

581
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,840
Speaker 1: That's why no one ever hears me. But where are you?

582
00:32:57,760 --> 00:32:59,960
Speaker 1: Are you in public? Yeah, in front, in front of

583
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,880
Speaker 1: crowds of thousands. You don't take your hands and fly

584
00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:06,640
Speaker 1: your butt. I do. I I don't. When I'm at work,

585
00:33:06,680 --> 00:33:11,320
Speaker 1: I go hold on everyone. No, so you sing, but

586
00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:16,000
Speaker 1: you won't fart. Very clear you're parting no matter what.

587
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:21,440
Speaker 1: Um No, I don't think it's clear. I think I

588
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 1: get away with it each time. But yea, but Matt's

589
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: also working with different equipment. Matt has a very I

590
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,600
Speaker 1: would say, um globular ass. I think I've seen it

591
00:33:30,680 --> 00:33:34,920
Speaker 1: on Instagram. Yes, you have shown it on Instagram. I

592
00:33:35,120 --> 00:33:38,920
Speaker 1: have taken almost nude pictures. I've taken some almost new pictures,

593
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,040
Speaker 1: not because of like a vain thing, because I think

594
00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:43,720
Speaker 1: it's funny. It's very funny. You're you really do do

595
00:33:43,840 --> 00:33:46,920
Speaker 1: that funny because it's funny, because it's also like, yeah,

596
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:49,520
Speaker 1: he's like it's like, this is a good picture, you

597
00:33:49,560 --> 00:33:51,520
Speaker 1: know what I mean. But it's also like, you know,

598
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:54,600
Speaker 1: he knows he knew me a good picture for us.

599
00:33:54,880 --> 00:34:00,400
Speaker 1: I think that Yeah, for us, globular does not sound

600
00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:02,479
Speaker 1: like a good thing. But I'll take it like globe

601
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: like a little, like a little it's honestly, it's not

602
00:34:06,520 --> 00:34:08,520
Speaker 1: not there. I will say this is a new this

603
00:34:08,680 --> 00:34:11,320
Speaker 1: is this is new lexicon for the for the listeners

604
00:34:11,360 --> 00:34:15,520
Speaker 1: out there. Matt famously refers to his ass as his world.

605
00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:18,920
Speaker 1: My whole is my world. Like if you're ever going

606
00:34:18,960 --> 00:34:21,160
Speaker 1: to show someone, if you if anyone ever is going

607
00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:23,640
Speaker 1: to go down there and you know, see it or

608
00:34:23,840 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 1: do things to it, I say, you show them your world.

609
00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:30,479
Speaker 1: You can invite them into your world. Yeah, Or He'll say,

610
00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 1: I'm about to show you my world, and then and

611
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:38,400
Speaker 1: then and then I'll simply raise my legs high like

612
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:43,640
Speaker 1: lady Liberty holds a torch and spread them. You got

613
00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:47,600
Speaker 1: holding your leg like so up in the right hand

614
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:52,920
Speaker 1: like that. Yes, he's doing it. Now, he's doing it. Now.

615
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:56,520
Speaker 1: It does look like Lady Liberty. It's beautiful. But if

616
00:34:56,560 --> 00:35:10,759
Speaker 1: it's slowly turning, um here for your huddled it's like

617
00:35:11,160 --> 00:35:17,000
Speaker 1: a shock. That would be the next word. That's what

618
00:35:17,120 --> 00:35:19,920
Speaker 1: it says. Really, no one's actually looked at her little book,

619
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:22,839
Speaker 1: her little book. That's what it says. On her little book,

620
00:35:22,840 --> 00:35:25,279
Speaker 1: her little black book, her little black book. Who do

621
00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:27,000
Speaker 1: you think is in the statue of Liberties? A little

622
00:35:27,000 --> 00:35:31,560
Speaker 1: black book? Carry and all the guys she slept with? Who?

623
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:35,759
Speaker 1: Who hoo hoo? You know, tell Mr Jeffson, I think

624
00:35:35,800 --> 00:35:39,120
Speaker 1: she the Stonehenges. I think she sucked the Colossus of Routes.

625
00:35:39,160 --> 00:35:42,279
Speaker 1: Oh no, mo wash moore boys, she sucked the Rio

626
00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:45,880
Speaker 1: de Janeiro. Jesus, I just I just want to I

627
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:50,360
Speaker 1: want to listen to Joe just talking in this masculine accent.

628
00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:58,120
Speaker 1: The shiny andy wohole, the shiny she fucked the Eastern Island, guys.

629
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:07,120
Speaker 1: The whole horses she fucked up were horses on Eastern

630
00:36:07,200 --> 00:36:11,279
Speaker 1: Park where there you know those um by the Brooklyn Museum. Yeah,

631
00:36:11,280 --> 00:36:13,960
Speaker 1: and it's like that big arch. Yes, oh yes, the

632
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:16,759
Speaker 1: granity process. Of course. I'm so sorry. You know, she

633
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:19,520
Speaker 1: sucked everyone on Rushmore but Teddy Roosevelt because she was like,

634
00:36:19,560 --> 00:36:24,840
Speaker 1: why are you up there? Because the sculptor wanted to

635
00:36:24,880 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 1: show off that they could do glasses. Wow, okay, special skills.

636
00:36:34,560 --> 00:36:40,760
Speaker 1: Um Joe. I think I think you were really amazing, amazing,

637
00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:46,759
Speaker 1: and you're showing America the breath of of the characters

638
00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:51,960
Speaker 1: that we see in real life, such as Betsy. Back

639
00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:55,600
Speaker 1: up Ohio us his back up ohio tell us what

640
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:59,879
Speaker 1: goes into everyday life? What goes into making these people

641
00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:02,680
Speaker 1: come to life? Talk about that, Well, you get like

642
00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:08,520
Speaker 1: one hour before you know it's happening, and then that

643
00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:12,120
Speaker 1: hour is spent in makeup. So but the time you

644
00:37:12,160 --> 00:37:15,840
Speaker 1: get out there, it's really just exploring. Oh well, exploring

645
00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:20,200
Speaker 1: and heightening, but it's successful exploration, and it's sometimes it's

646
00:37:20,360 --> 00:37:23,920
Speaker 1: it's like a very it feels like um, like you wrote,

647
00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:27,360
Speaker 1: like it feels like someone did a TV. It's like

648
00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:29,120
Speaker 1: what you would have imagine, and like working in a

649
00:37:29,200 --> 00:37:30,960
Speaker 1: late night shows, you're just like oh and then you

650
00:37:31,040 --> 00:37:32,800
Speaker 1: just get in bakeup and then you run on stage

651
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:34,360
Speaker 1: and then you're like, oh, that's what it is? Actually,

652
00:37:34,400 --> 00:37:36,520
Speaker 1: what is it really is? Makes it not? I mean

653
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:40,160
Speaker 1: it's yeah, I don't know. So you are enjoying working there. Yeah,

654
00:37:40,280 --> 00:37:43,319
Speaker 1: it's a hard job, but I you know, I don't

655
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:46,880
Speaker 1: really sleep very much, no Joe. But apart from that,

656
00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:50,000
Speaker 1: it's okay. They have Helen Hardy soup in the basement.

657
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:54,799
Speaker 1: I love that. Do you have you had the Totalini Florentine? No, god,

658
00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:58,120
Speaker 1: I need to try that. Is that a staple day?

659
00:37:58,680 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 1: It's not okay. I get email blasts from them whenever

660
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:06,640
Speaker 1: they have my favorite flavors. Oh my god. And I

661
00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,360
Speaker 1: got an email from them today and they were flirting

662
00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 1: with me because they said it was total Leaning but

663
00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:13,560
Speaker 1: it had mushrooms in it, and I knew they were

664
00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:17,000
Speaker 1: being bad and that did that? Did that make you

665
00:38:17,160 --> 00:38:19,160
Speaker 1: say I really want to go or you didn't want to?

666
00:38:19,600 --> 00:38:21,600
Speaker 1: Deal breaker? No? I I don't mind much room because

667
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:24,120
Speaker 1: I put it on my list. But that's true. You

668
00:38:24,160 --> 00:38:25,640
Speaker 1: did put it on the lest you did ask for it.

669
00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:29,680
Speaker 1: I did. I do feel like I said to myself,

670
00:38:29,880 --> 00:38:32,400
Speaker 1: the large isn't large enough, and I thought that's so

671
00:38:32,920 --> 00:38:36,520
Speaker 1: fucking stupid that I get mad about a soup. No,

672
00:38:36,719 --> 00:38:38,480
Speaker 1: I get mad about soup all the time that I'm

673
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:41,279
Speaker 1: going to that soup place so much. But it's good.

674
00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:45,120
Speaker 1: And also it's like, isn't it healthier? No? No, um,

675
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:47,120
Speaker 1: but the cream of tomato. My favorite is the cream

676
00:38:47,120 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 1: of tomato with ours out? And what do you get?

677
00:38:49,880 --> 00:38:58,359
Speaker 1: Do you get those seven s seven seven seven time

678
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:04,879
Speaker 1: passes back and forth? Sour? It's the seven grain sour

679
00:39:04,960 --> 00:39:09,239
Speaker 1: do crackers? I got it sour grubs. Diday, I had

680
00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:14,800
Speaker 1: four halfs of cupcakes so too, because I was like,

681
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:16,920
Speaker 1: I don't want to go to the super place. Do

682
00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:18,239
Speaker 1: you know what I always get when I go to

683
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:25,880
Speaker 1: Helen Hardy The seafood chowder, the lobster biss that's expensive.

684
00:39:26,120 --> 00:39:30,640
Speaker 1: It is expensive. It's sometimes upwards of eleven. I had

685
00:39:30,680 --> 00:39:33,920
Speaker 1: the big one too, because I have a big stomach

686
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:40,520
Speaker 1: turned into a dick at night, midnight, precisely, it's all

687
00:39:40,600 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 1: that lobster bisk. Hey, why you got the biggest stuppocket

688
00:39:43,600 --> 00:39:47,239
Speaker 1: A little body with a globular ass, Well, if you

689
00:39:47,360 --> 00:39:51,399
Speaker 1: must know, my big gass tummy turns into a cock

690
00:39:51,440 --> 00:39:54,840
Speaker 1: at night, and then I lift on my legs to

691
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:58,160
Speaker 1: the sky like Lady liberty her goddamn self and show

692
00:39:58,239 --> 00:40:01,359
Speaker 1: my world. Can you imagine why own belly? Dick? You're

693
00:40:01,480 --> 00:40:04,120
Speaker 1: in somebody, you're in somebody else and you're like this

694
00:40:04,280 --> 00:40:09,040
Speaker 1: used to be and they go and in just moments

695
00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:12,319
Speaker 1: it's going to turn back quick quick, let me come.

696
00:40:13,920 --> 00:40:19,960
Speaker 1: It's not it's and and you're your old boss or

697
00:40:20,000 --> 00:40:23,120
Speaker 1: your whatever. That guy that that's Jeff. He's saying it

698
00:40:23,160 --> 00:40:26,680
Speaker 1: as if the belly is the is like the carriages, like,

699
00:40:26,800 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: and the dick is the pumpkins. You know what I'm saying,

700
00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:33,080
Speaker 1: Like the belly is like the drafts. But did you

701
00:40:33,120 --> 00:40:34,840
Speaker 1: guys what I'm trying to say, It's like, the belly

702
00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:38,120
Speaker 1: is not the curse. The belly is the He was

703
00:40:38,320 --> 00:40:42,280
Speaker 1: clearly horrified and put on the spot and honestly objectified physically,

704
00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:45,680
Speaker 1: like he might have been a nightmare to work with,

705
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 1: but he was being cruelly, cruelly addressed. He was put

706
00:40:49,719 --> 00:40:52,239
Speaker 1: in a bad situation. I do remember that was like

707
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:54,279
Speaker 1: the only Jeb the only time I've been ever like

708
00:40:54,400 --> 00:40:57,800
Speaker 1: sexually harassed. But it was this guy kept saying, I

709
00:40:57,880 --> 00:41:05,080
Speaker 1: looked like, who's the woman that's since world? Um, which

710
00:41:05,160 --> 00:41:08,920
Speaker 1: woman she's really politically active. She was like five years ago.

711
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:11,480
Speaker 1: She doesn't have any hair. Oh, she was in the

712
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:20,120
Speaker 1: league of our own sister. You're talking about um? Oh god, No,

713
00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:23,439
Speaker 1: I don't think it. Wait Lori petty. Yes, and they'd

714
00:41:23,480 --> 00:41:29,960
Speaker 1: be like, girl, you look like Lori petty, girl, young, petty,

715
00:41:30,080 --> 00:41:34,800
Speaker 1: scrappy one from their own little sister. Yeah, a little

716
00:41:35,239 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 1: she was annoying. Yeah, what's her name? In the movie Ki? Ki? Yeah?

717
00:41:40,520 --> 00:41:43,320
Speaker 1: Do you know that that baseball stadium is still intact? What?

718
00:41:43,800 --> 00:41:46,480
Speaker 1: It's perfectly intact because the mayor of that town was like,

719
00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:49,160
Speaker 1: you got to make it built to last. It didn't

720
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:54,759
Speaker 1: used to be my playground still now, but now the

721
00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:59,160
Speaker 1: Rockford Peaches are a cheerleading team for the boys baseball. No,

722
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:04,600
Speaker 1: that's horrible. I honestly think, oh my god. Option this

723
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:07,719
Speaker 1: make a fucking reboot where the cheerleaders want to play

724
00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:11,480
Speaker 1: the plot of play. Yeah. I don't know, gus. Option this,

725
00:42:11,880 --> 00:42:14,759
Speaker 1: Option this is that that should be a new that

726
00:42:14,800 --> 00:42:19,239
Speaker 1: should be a new segment on the show. Option that's good.

727
00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:23,239
Speaker 1: That's what got her on the tonight. The segments. It's

728
00:42:23,239 --> 00:42:26,320
Speaker 1: a crazy bit called option this with Jimmy Fahlon where Jimmy,

729
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:31,439
Speaker 1: he goes option this and and he chooses a choice. Joe,

730
00:42:31,520 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 1: I just got get you know what, that joke and

731
00:42:33,280 --> 00:42:35,360
Speaker 1: just toss off these premises and their gold. And but

732
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,640
Speaker 1: it's like it's like she doesn't mean, well, last we

733
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:40,480
Speaker 1: got one fucking bit. I don't think we got one

734
00:42:40,560 --> 00:42:42,880
Speaker 1: fucking bit. Don't they're going to put it on our Goddamn.

735
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:49,400
Speaker 1: I just I think it would be really hard. I

736
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:52,120
Speaker 1: really don't think either of you should die first. I

737
00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:53,640
Speaker 1: think you should. We have to die together. We have

738
00:42:53,680 --> 00:42:56,239
Speaker 1: to die, and you know what, I think it's time.

739
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 1: I think I don't think so Honey. I think this,

740
00:42:58,440 --> 00:43:00,759
Speaker 1: this might be the last one. This is going to be.

741
00:43:01,280 --> 00:43:03,480
Speaker 1: I think after this we're gonna die. We're gonna die.

742
00:43:03,560 --> 00:43:07,840
Speaker 1: And come up with the backup. Please just come up

743
00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:11,279
Speaker 1: with the backup. What would you do? I want to

744
00:43:11,320 --> 00:43:13,440
Speaker 1: I want to pose a question to the to the listeners.

745
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:17,120
Speaker 1: What would the listeners do? Would would you do anything

746
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:20,279
Speaker 1: to keep I don't think so honey alive anything? What

747
00:43:20,360 --> 00:43:23,040
Speaker 1: would you do for us? What's in it for us? Please?

748
00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:25,480
Speaker 1: Don't think that they would continue the lost cultures this

749
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 1: brand with oh you're trying if we diet I'm talking

750
00:43:28,680 --> 00:43:31,879
Speaker 1: about h p J producer Jo think he would cast

751
00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 1: two people that looked and sounded like us to keep going,

752
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 1: Why do they need to look like you? Because he

753
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:41,799
Speaker 1: wants to fool them them. He thinks that they're all dumb,

754
00:43:41,960 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 1: the listeners, right right right. You can You can't fool

755
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:46,600
Speaker 1: someone with your voice, but you can fool someone with

756
00:43:46,680 --> 00:43:48,960
Speaker 1: their looks. Or no, that's the other way around. Yeah,

757
00:43:48,960 --> 00:43:50,200
Speaker 1: it's the other way around. But you know what, it's

758
00:43:50,440 --> 00:43:55,680
Speaker 1: because listener, Because the listeners are all guys coming, don't.

759
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,439
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna say this to you on the side,

760
00:43:57,560 --> 00:44:01,239
Speaker 1: Our listeners are dumb. Listen, you don't switch switch us

761
00:44:01,280 --> 00:44:05,960
Speaker 1: out at all? So dumb? You know, one of them?

762
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 1: Half of them? Half of them what half of them education?

763
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:15,880
Speaker 1: Half of your listeners have a fifth grade education? Like

764
00:44:18,719 --> 00:44:24,239
Speaker 1: they fucking so stupid. They think all this matters. They

765
00:44:24,360 --> 00:44:26,920
Speaker 1: got grade and patient and a sixth grade and the

766
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:32,640
Speaker 1: seventh grade and a college okay and dare you? Oh

767
00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:41,840
Speaker 1: option this a seventh straight to college? It's perfect. Okay,

768
00:44:42,400 --> 00:44:45,960
Speaker 1: So the Emmy's happened, yes, oh yes, so we're lovely.

769
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:48,040
Speaker 1: The time of recording this, we're recording this right after

770
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:50,520
Speaker 1: the Emmi has happened. Is that crazy that you, like,

771
00:44:50,760 --> 00:44:53,520
Speaker 1: all of your friends get dressed up? It's amazing on

772
00:44:53,600 --> 00:44:56,439
Speaker 1: your Instagram you're like, oh my god, even if you don't,

773
00:44:56,640 --> 00:44:59,200
Speaker 1: you're not friends and exactly you're like, my friends were

774
00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:01,520
Speaker 1: at the Emmy's. Can I tell you my favorite bite?

775
00:45:01,520 --> 00:45:05,360
Speaker 1: That's happening right now though, any it's ripping everyone apart

776
00:45:05,440 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 1: from what they wore. Annie Domy is doing fashion police

777
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:10,120
Speaker 1: on her Instagram for all of the all of the

778
00:45:10,200 --> 00:45:13,200
Speaker 1: people who went to the Emmy's, and she is really

779
00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:21,239
Speaker 1: taking their prisoners, telling everyone they look bad. Villain of

780
00:45:21,280 --> 00:45:23,680
Speaker 1: the Last Countries this podcast said, I don't think so, honey,

781
00:45:23,760 --> 00:45:27,919
Speaker 1: Bowen and Matt, I don't think so, honey. Two point

782
00:45:27,960 --> 00:45:30,080
Speaker 1: oh this is this is This is one of the

783
00:45:30,160 --> 00:45:32,800
Speaker 1: Annie's burns from her fashion police for the Emmy. She

784
00:45:32,880 --> 00:45:35,800
Speaker 1: goes meet your do harri Oh yeah, a little choker,

785
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:37,640
Speaker 1: a little goth girl. Will you look like a fucking

786
00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:42,600
Speaker 1: goth girl? But she's like almost not a bird at all.

787
00:45:42,840 --> 00:45:46,680
Speaker 1: But you know what an Annie's voice, anything anything is

788
00:45:48,360 --> 00:45:52,520
Speaker 1: I think is it time from my virginity story? Yeah? Wait,

789
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:56,080
Speaker 1: oh yes, that wasn't part of the plan, but I

790
00:45:56,160 --> 00:45:59,320
Speaker 1: will tell it. No, Well, I lost my virginity to

791
00:46:00,560 --> 00:46:02,759
Speaker 1: the owner of a clam bar that I worked at

792
00:46:02,800 --> 00:46:06,520
Speaker 1: in high school. He texted me a lot over the

793
00:46:06,880 --> 00:46:09,800
Speaker 1: school year proceeding. When I was a freshman in college,

794
00:46:09,800 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 1: I was slowly considering coming out and he took my

795
00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:17,200
Speaker 1: V card over the summer, not on a boat. That

796
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:20,879
Speaker 1: was later. Um, he took my V card into bed

797
00:46:22,080 --> 00:46:25,160
Speaker 1: and UM, I'll tell you what. I'd be working at

798
00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:28,040
Speaker 1: the cash register downstairs, getting making coffee for a guests,

799
00:46:28,080 --> 00:46:29,560
Speaker 1: and he would call it down and say, hey, can

800
00:46:29,800 --> 00:46:31,960
Speaker 1: you send Matt Rodgers up with a coffee for me?

801
00:46:32,120 --> 00:46:34,279
Speaker 1: And every weekress in the restaurant wouldn't know what that means.

802
00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:36,640
Speaker 1: And I would go right up there in nineteen year

803
00:46:36,640 --> 00:46:40,520
Speaker 1: old me and he was nine. Looking back, I would

804
00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,719
Speaker 1: not have done that. But the boat story is I

805
00:46:44,840 --> 00:46:47,680
Speaker 1: told him I didn't want to hook up with him anymore.

806
00:46:48,120 --> 00:46:50,839
Speaker 1: He said, okay, we'll just be friends. He's like, let's

807
00:46:50,840 --> 00:46:54,279
Speaker 1: go out on the boat this weekend. We went out

808
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:56,880
Speaker 1: into the Lisles Sound and he anchored the boat and

809
00:46:57,040 --> 00:46:58,960
Speaker 1: he said, we're going to hook up. And I was like,

810
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:02,400
Speaker 1: I don't want to do that. So that's actually a

811
00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:06,880
Speaker 1: shitty story. Yeah, that's really messed up. It is messed up.

812
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 1: And I did it, like essentially, I like gave consent

813
00:47:10,600 --> 00:47:13,839
Speaker 1: to it, but like but then but like I didn't

814
00:47:13,880 --> 00:47:16,719
Speaker 1: realize until years later that how funked up that was,

815
00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:22,319
Speaker 1: especially to a nineteen year old, where is still there?

816
00:47:22,800 --> 00:47:27,759
Speaker 1: Still there? All right, well it's no, I mean, that's

817
00:47:28,440 --> 00:47:31,560
Speaker 1: that's bad. But the thing is and I didn't even

818
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:34,920
Speaker 1: realize it was bad until years later. That's like the

819
00:47:35,080 --> 00:47:38,160
Speaker 1: physical like you're staying put because I was going to

820
00:47:38,239 --> 00:47:42,120
Speaker 1: do literally jump into the lis on sound. Oh it

821
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:45,200
Speaker 1: was so shitty. And I actually didn't tell anyone about

822
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 1: that until last year. What I believe like it was

823
00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:50,279
Speaker 1: like it was like very much not a moment for me,

824
00:47:50,360 --> 00:47:52,520
Speaker 1: like the social media movement of everyone sharing their kind

825
00:47:52,520 --> 00:47:54,200
Speaker 1: of stories and everything like that. But I told Henry,

826
00:47:54,239 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 1: I was like, you know, just you know, like I

827
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 1: feel like I didn't. I kind of didn't realize like

828
00:47:58,480 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 1: that this happened, but this totally happened. I mean, and

829
00:48:02,680 --> 00:48:04,480
Speaker 1: I brought up I asked you to bring it. I

830
00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:07,080
Speaker 1: brought the boat. No, honestly, I was sharing in his

831
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:10,120
Speaker 1: lighthearted story and then I was like, and I sometimes

832
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:11,839
Speaker 1: say the boat thing and I don't really get into

833
00:48:11,880 --> 00:48:14,920
Speaker 1: what happened on the boat, but that did happen. You

834
00:48:14,960 --> 00:48:16,640
Speaker 1: know what, we can and it happens. I think so

835
00:48:16,800 --> 00:48:22,640
Speaker 1: many people absolutely just like those situations of like you

836
00:48:22,840 --> 00:48:25,000
Speaker 1: did it, but you didn't give consent, even though you

837
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 1: technically like I didn't do a drag in your feet,

838
00:48:29,160 --> 00:48:30,480
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? The thing is is that

839
00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:34,400
Speaker 1: you would never do that to someone else. No, And

840
00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:39,320
Speaker 1: I think it's like I just wonder what those people think, Like,

841
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:42,400
Speaker 1: what what is that guy think? Is he just like him?

842
00:48:42,400 --> 00:48:44,800
Speaker 1: All he thought it was like flirty and fun, but

843
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:46,480
Speaker 1: I had made it clear that I didn't want to

844
00:48:46,520 --> 00:48:50,560
Speaker 1: do that anymore. You don't that's not a friend. Yeah,

845
00:48:50,840 --> 00:48:54,800
Speaker 1: it was really even if I took you out to

846
00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:57,160
Speaker 1: seat and put an anchor down and we're not going

847
00:48:57,239 --> 00:48:59,120
Speaker 1: to have sex. Even if I was just like let's

848
00:48:59,160 --> 00:49:01,600
Speaker 1: just sit here for you're like I want to go back, yeah,

849
00:49:01,920 --> 00:49:03,480
Speaker 1: and I was like, no, let's just sit here for

850
00:49:03,480 --> 00:49:06,319
Speaker 1: a while, you'd be like, this fucking crazy bitch needs

851
00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:10,680
Speaker 1: to get out of my life. It was crazy. It

852
00:49:10,840 --> 00:49:13,440
Speaker 1: was crazy, and then all of a sudden the relationship

853
00:49:13,520 --> 00:49:16,520
Speaker 1: was like back on because I was like, well, I mean,

854
00:49:16,640 --> 00:49:19,279
Speaker 1: like I guess it's gonna happen regardless, but this is

855
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:21,160
Speaker 1: these are things that you don't realize. That's like a

856
00:49:21,239 --> 00:49:24,239
Speaker 1: nineteen year old who not for nothing but lives in

857
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:27,040
Speaker 1: Long Island where the patriarchy is super solid. And I

858
00:49:27,160 --> 00:49:29,520
Speaker 1: mean that not only just as men have control over women,

859
00:49:29,600 --> 00:49:33,200
Speaker 1: but like older men have control over younger men. And

860
00:49:33,880 --> 00:49:37,400
Speaker 1: you know, he was my boss. So there was so

861
00:49:37,560 --> 00:49:41,000
Speaker 1: much going into it that was like weird. Um, but yeah,

862
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:43,800
Speaker 1: that's a funked up story. But I didn't know I

863
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:46,359
Speaker 1: was going to just share. But look I was saying.

864
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:49,279
Speaker 1: I was saying, did you get rid of him when

865
00:49:49,320 --> 00:49:52,920
Speaker 1: he went to college? Yeah? Yes, And then he was

866
00:49:53,040 --> 00:49:54,920
Speaker 1: very upset about that because he was like, so what

867
00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:57,800
Speaker 1: you have no time for anymore? Like because I I

868
00:49:58,040 --> 00:49:59,640
Speaker 1: decided that when I went back to school, I would

869
00:49:59,680 --> 00:50:02,760
Speaker 1: come out of the closet and like transferred to tish

870
00:50:03,239 --> 00:50:05,759
Speaker 1: n y u and like try to, um, you know,

871
00:50:05,840 --> 00:50:08,600
Speaker 1: pursue comedy finally, and I was gonna like really try

872
00:50:08,640 --> 00:50:10,800
Speaker 1: to become who I was. And he like that was

873
00:50:10,880 --> 00:50:13,600
Speaker 1: like such a bad thing. He was like, so what,

874
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:15,359
Speaker 1: You're not going to come back and work here over

875
00:50:15,440 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 1: the summer anymore, Like we're not going to be friends

876
00:50:17,440 --> 00:50:19,320
Speaker 1: and like, you know, I'm just gonna sit here and

877
00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:22,520
Speaker 1: work at this place forever and etcetera, etcetera. And it

878
00:50:22,680 --> 00:50:27,800
Speaker 1: was kind of like yeah, and now looking back on it,

879
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:30,640
Speaker 1: he's like very much a Trump supporter. And this I

880
00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:33,480
Speaker 1: think is a common thread with a lot of those

881
00:50:33,520 --> 00:50:36,120
Speaker 1: people is they're angry about them their lives and how

882
00:50:36,160 --> 00:50:39,200
Speaker 1: they've turned out, and they feel very trapped situationally, and

883
00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:41,640
Speaker 1: they're looking for someone to blame and it's or that

884
00:50:41,719 --> 00:50:44,000
Speaker 1: they have politics in general, and they think it change

885
00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:46,239
Speaker 1: up there is going to like change their lives, and

886
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:49,799
Speaker 1: they're just they're obsessed with being the victim or they're

887
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:53,040
Speaker 1: you know, they've sexually assaulted people and they identify it

888
00:50:53,120 --> 00:50:56,680
Speaker 1: with that as you know whatever. I feel like that

889
00:50:56,800 --> 00:51:00,600
Speaker 1: kind of like it's also like that's you're eighteen years old,

890
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:03,080
Speaker 1: he's twenty nine years he is. You have no, you

891
00:51:03,160 --> 00:51:05,880
Speaker 1: have no. You don't have to dictate his life. No,

892
00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:09,520
Speaker 1: he can do whatever he wants. And to be like, no,

893
00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:12,280
Speaker 1: you're not, You're just gonna leave me, that's kind of manipulus.

894
00:51:12,280 --> 00:51:15,239
Speaker 1: It was so weird and manipulative. And I remember at

895
00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:18,440
Speaker 1: one point, like when I knew it had to end.

896
00:51:19,160 --> 00:51:21,520
Speaker 1: Was there was like the real owner of the restaurant,

897
00:51:21,520 --> 00:51:23,799
Speaker 1: who was his father, and he had like a much

898
00:51:23,880 --> 00:51:26,520
Speaker 1: younger girlfriend who was like sixteen or seventeen young years

899
00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:28,320
Speaker 1: younger than him, and she was like the manager of

900
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:31,320
Speaker 1: the restaurant, and she was always very unhappy, and you know,

901
00:51:31,640 --> 00:51:34,239
Speaker 1: it just wasn't a good it was very negative atmosphere.

902
00:51:34,719 --> 00:51:36,200
Speaker 1: And she looked at me one day and she was like,

903
00:51:36,320 --> 00:51:38,279
Speaker 1: I just know that you and so and so we're

904
00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:41,000
Speaker 1: gonna fall in love and you're just gonna you guys

905
00:51:41,040 --> 00:51:44,400
Speaker 1: are gonna be just like me and my boyfriend. And

906
00:51:44,520 --> 00:51:47,120
Speaker 1: I was and I was like, oh my god, I

907
00:51:47,239 --> 00:51:49,440
Speaker 1: have to get the funk out of here. I was

908
00:51:49,520 --> 00:51:54,400
Speaker 1: like I cannot do this. I was like, this is horrifying.

909
00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:56,720
Speaker 1: And also, you know what else sucks is you can't

910
00:51:56,800 --> 00:51:59,719
Speaker 1: tell anyone about it when it happens because you're closeted.

911
00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 1: And I think he knew and and it was my

912
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:07,040
Speaker 1: job and everyone that and honestly, if I had said

913
00:52:07,120 --> 00:52:08,840
Speaker 1: something to my coworkers, they would have just been like,

914
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:12,560
Speaker 1: oh my god, that's so crazy. Then no one knew that.

915
00:52:12,680 --> 00:52:16,240
Speaker 1: It was like no one was had to like especially

916
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:18,320
Speaker 1: out there, and at that time, like there was no

917
00:52:18,440 --> 00:52:20,680
Speaker 1: like way to express like I think I was like

918
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:24,520
Speaker 1: sexually assaulted, taking advantage of Like it was not like that.

919
00:52:24,719 --> 00:52:27,360
Speaker 1: It was like it sounds hot or I guess you

920
00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:30,759
Speaker 1: guys are back on men. And also you know when

921
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:33,320
Speaker 1: that grabb him by the pussy stuff came out, that

922
00:52:33,520 --> 00:52:35,759
Speaker 1: group of people were all like, come on, this is

923
00:52:35,840 --> 00:52:38,640
Speaker 1: just how men talk. This is ridiculous. This is how

924
00:52:38,719 --> 00:52:41,120
Speaker 1: men talk. Crooked Hillary blah blah blah. And I was like,

925
00:52:41,680 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 1: you know what, maybe you guys need some better men

926
00:52:43,840 --> 00:52:48,160
Speaker 1: in your lives. And that's nationwide. People didn't give a

927
00:52:48,200 --> 00:52:51,000
Speaker 1: funk about that because that's the kind of men that

928
00:52:51,760 --> 00:52:54,000
Speaker 1: are out there. Realized how many times I've heard that

929
00:52:54,080 --> 00:52:57,920
Speaker 1: expression grabbed them by the pussy, and just it's like

930
00:52:58,040 --> 00:53:00,560
Speaker 1: hasn't been a visual for a while, it just became

931
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:04,560
Speaker 1: a visual just hands. I mean, it's a horrible visual

932
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:07,320
Speaker 1: and it's just but isn't Yeah, isn't that awful? Like

933
00:53:07,760 --> 00:53:11,120
Speaker 1: a combination of words that actually makes no sense, Like, no,

934
00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:14,680
Speaker 1: it doesn't make sense, but I think it does. I

935
00:53:14,800 --> 00:53:16,600
Speaker 1: think he would do it. I think he would do it.

936
00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:19,160
Speaker 1: But it's like, but like, I mean, that's the thing

937
00:53:19,200 --> 00:53:21,560
Speaker 1: where you really have to put the lady liberties legs.

938
00:53:23,080 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 1: But he's he's saying that as if like women are

939
00:53:27,880 --> 00:53:30,520
Speaker 1: aroused by that. You know, I think that that does

940
00:53:30,680 --> 00:53:33,200
Speaker 1: that is the kind of thing that arouses gas. I

941
00:53:33,320 --> 00:53:35,399
Speaker 1: think that that if you are surprised and that way,

942
00:53:35,440 --> 00:53:40,680
Speaker 1: it doesn't release the bowels. You. Yes, you, I'm sure

943
00:53:40,920 --> 00:53:47,799
Speaker 1: that spread spread the cheek grounded by the world. Donald Trump,

944
00:53:48,920 --> 00:53:50,960
Speaker 1: do you think do you think that you would be

945
00:53:51,120 --> 00:53:54,920
Speaker 1: more likely if you saw Donald Trump to like, um,

946
00:53:56,280 --> 00:53:59,120
Speaker 1: to like do something, would you part in him? Okay,

947
00:53:59,480 --> 00:54:02,799
Speaker 1: I'm going to a catatonic state. So here's what happened. Um,

948
00:54:05,560 --> 00:54:09,440
Speaker 1: So he walked past me. I went to I went

949
00:54:09,520 --> 00:54:12,640
Speaker 1: to the taping of his Center episode two years ago

950
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:16,600
Speaker 1: and uh, okay, well, first I should start off. So

951
00:54:16,640 --> 00:54:19,240
Speaker 1: Sudie invited me to Sudi invited me and Becky Shoquin

952
00:54:19,320 --> 00:54:21,279
Speaker 1: and Sami says her guests, and we all go and

953
00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:23,440
Speaker 1: then we got a great group. And then we all

954
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:25,480
Speaker 1: go out afterwards to where the after party is and

955
00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:28,279
Speaker 1: we're some of the first people there. And then that

956
00:54:28,520 --> 00:54:30,960
Speaker 1: show that episode, Ivanka had a walk on during one

957
00:54:31,000 --> 00:54:33,320
Speaker 1: of the sketches and no one applauded for her. She

958
00:54:33,440 --> 00:54:35,640
Speaker 1: had her one line, she was like a prompter mistake.

959
00:54:35,719 --> 00:54:38,960
Speaker 1: Prompter mistake, Like, I don't think the applause thing went up, Yeah, exactly,

960
00:54:39,280 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 1: so people don't applaud for her, and I think and

961
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:43,600
Speaker 1: Sudie was like, oh, that sucks, like I kind of

962
00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 1: feel bad about that, and we were like, yeah, I

963
00:54:45,239 --> 00:54:48,279
Speaker 1: guess so um and and so uh And this was

964
00:54:48,360 --> 00:54:50,520
Speaker 1: before you could really just like pin that on, pin

965
00:54:50,560 --> 00:54:52,600
Speaker 1: all the ship on Ivanka at the time, she had

966
00:54:52,640 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 1: our sympathy in a way, yes, um and so uh.

967
00:54:56,360 --> 00:54:57,879
Speaker 1: So then the four of us go to this after

968
00:54:57,960 --> 00:55:03,120
Speaker 1: party restaurant and we're just sitting there, eating, drinking, and then, uh,

969
00:55:03,600 --> 00:55:06,920
Speaker 1: who should walk in, buddy, Ivanka? And Ivanka walks in

970
00:55:07,000 --> 00:55:09,080
Speaker 1: and she had just announced her pregnancy like two weeks

971
00:55:09,120 --> 00:55:11,440
Speaker 1: before I had seen. So she walks in and then

972
00:55:11,480 --> 00:55:13,399
Speaker 1: we were pretty we were all pretty hammered at this point,

973
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:17,520
Speaker 1: so we go, yes, Ivanca, like we were her fucking

974
00:55:17,680 --> 00:55:21,760
Speaker 1: best idiot girlfriend idiots, and then we're just like waving

975
00:55:21,800 --> 00:55:24,279
Speaker 1: her down and then she turned sees us, clocks us,

976
00:55:24,360 --> 00:55:26,680
Speaker 1: and then like smiles and waves at us as if

977
00:55:26,719 --> 00:55:30,759
Speaker 1: she recognized us or something over and she walked over

978
00:55:30,840 --> 00:55:33,320
Speaker 1: and it's like, oh, like you're so used to this,

979
00:55:33,719 --> 00:55:36,920
Speaker 1: You're so used to doing performatively doing this. So she

980
00:55:37,040 --> 00:55:39,080
Speaker 1: walks over to us. She goes, Hi, how are you

981
00:55:39,239 --> 00:55:42,800
Speaker 1: great to see you? And we were like hi. We

982
00:55:42,840 --> 00:55:45,080
Speaker 1: were like, we were like, we were like a great

983
00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:47,800
Speaker 1: job tonight. You were so fun in the episode. And

984
00:55:47,920 --> 00:55:51,440
Speaker 1: she goes and she literally said, well, thanks so much.

985
00:55:51,560 --> 00:55:54,440
Speaker 1: I mean snl, what did dream come true? Am I right?

986
00:55:54,520 --> 00:55:57,759
Speaker 1: And we were like yeah, And then I went just

987
00:55:58,760 --> 00:56:01,439
Speaker 1: hammered at this point. I go and then I rubbed

988
00:56:01,480 --> 00:56:07,720
Speaker 1: my belly. I go and congratulations. No fucking like gabbed

989
00:56:07,760 --> 00:56:09,640
Speaker 1: with her and she was like, thank you so much.

990
00:56:09,719 --> 00:56:12,320
Speaker 1: We're so like, she goes, Jared and I are so

991
00:56:14,719 --> 00:56:18,200
Speaker 1: you didn't know he was a little boy. No, we didn't.

992
00:56:18,200 --> 00:56:20,960
Speaker 1: You know, you hadn't You hadn't really seen Jared at

993
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:23,759
Speaker 1: that point. And so she said that and then she

994
00:56:23,920 --> 00:56:27,600
Speaker 1: like exchanged a couple more pleasant trees and then she's

995
00:56:27,640 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 1: like and then she's like, well, um, well I've got

996
00:56:30,000 --> 00:56:31,760
Speaker 1: to go back to my section. But it was great

997
00:56:31,840 --> 00:56:34,040
Speaker 1: talking to you guys. Have a great night, okay, And

998
00:56:34,120 --> 00:56:37,200
Speaker 1: we were like by and then genuinely I was like, wow, um,

999
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:39,440
Speaker 1: I know her dad's a piece of ship, but I

1000
00:56:40,440 --> 00:56:44,080
Speaker 1: I'm really genuinely starstruck, and I kind of was she

1001
00:56:44,200 --> 00:56:47,640
Speaker 1: gorgeous in person? She was fine in person. Um, just

1002
00:56:47,800 --> 00:56:51,840
Speaker 1: this towering bird. And then so then fucking Bill O'Riley

1003
00:56:51,920 --> 00:56:54,200
Speaker 1: shows up too, and that was insane. But then then

1004
00:56:54,280 --> 00:56:57,200
Speaker 1: I'm drunk, and then um, I'm close to the bar,

1005
00:56:57,320 --> 00:56:59,480
Speaker 1: which is close to the door. And then towards the

1006
00:56:59,600 --> 00:57:03,360
Speaker 1: end of the at this point, Donald's leaving and everyone's

1007
00:57:03,400 --> 00:57:05,919
Speaker 1: just like, oh, make way, like like Trump is leaving,

1008
00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:10,160
Speaker 1: and so I like step out. Um. I stepped out

1009
00:57:10,200 --> 00:57:12,040
Speaker 1: of the way and he walks by me, and in

1010
00:57:12,200 --> 00:57:15,560
Speaker 1: that moment, I was like he's a foot away from me,

1011
00:57:15,719 --> 00:57:17,760
Speaker 1: Like I mean, I had that thing where it's just

1012
00:57:17,880 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 1: like I mean, I mean that you couldn't do it.

1013
00:57:20,400 --> 00:57:22,320
Speaker 1: I could. I could do something. I could like I

1014
00:57:22,360 --> 00:57:25,480
Speaker 1: could like far or like scream or something, and like

1015
00:57:25,520 --> 00:57:27,400
Speaker 1: I could be that insane person. But then you know,

1016
00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:30,200
Speaker 1: I've never I've never told anybody this before. You know

1017
00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:34,120
Speaker 1: what I did. What I said again drunk, I go

1018
00:57:34,880 --> 00:57:39,680
Speaker 1: great show tonight. You didn't didn't look at me and

1019
00:57:39,720 --> 00:57:41,800
Speaker 1: just waved and said yeah, thank you and then walked out.

1020
00:57:41,800 --> 00:57:43,200
Speaker 1: And then Bill A. Riley was right behind him, and

1021
00:57:43,200 --> 00:57:47,160
Speaker 1: then I walked right. Uh, I walked out, stopped and

1022
00:57:47,240 --> 00:57:52,840
Speaker 1: was like, Hi, grat SML when a dream come true,

1023
00:57:52,920 --> 00:57:59,200
Speaker 1: and thank you Darren. I are so excited. I'm fully

1024
00:57:59,280 --> 00:58:02,440
Speaker 1: I'm filled with shame that I complimented Donald Trump on

1025
00:58:02,560 --> 00:58:05,200
Speaker 1: his SML episode, and that is a true fact and

1026
00:58:05,400 --> 00:58:08,960
Speaker 1: I will never live that down. I don't think, as

1027
00:58:09,000 --> 00:58:11,360
Speaker 1: far as the media is concerned, you've done the worst

1028
00:58:11,560 --> 00:58:15,760
Speaker 1: thing by any means. Think he even listened to you.

1029
00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:18,880
Speaker 1: He didn't, didn't didn't acknowledge my existence. He wouldn't remember you.

1030
00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:20,480
Speaker 1: I don't think. But no, I'm just saying it's the

1031
00:58:20,680 --> 00:58:24,040
Speaker 1: it's the thing. It's I think it's the thing like

1032
00:58:24,280 --> 00:58:26,000
Speaker 1: if you could go back in time and like do

1033
00:58:26,160 --> 00:58:28,680
Speaker 1: the kill Hitler. Not saying I would have killed him,

1034
00:58:29,120 --> 00:58:32,320
Speaker 1: killed Trump, but it's just like out but it's like

1035
00:58:33,560 --> 00:58:35,800
Speaker 1: it's like, oh, in this moment, in this moment in

1036
00:58:35,880 --> 00:58:37,720
Speaker 1: time when I was, when I was that close to him,

1037
00:58:38,240 --> 00:58:43,080
Speaker 1: what I chose to do was to compliment. Insane. I mean,

1038
00:58:43,120 --> 00:58:44,720
Speaker 1: I do think that there's a thing where it's like

1039
00:58:44,800 --> 00:58:47,480
Speaker 1: what do you actually do when you're with you know,

1040
00:58:47,920 --> 00:58:50,439
Speaker 1: and like I don't think at that point people knew

1041
00:58:50,480 --> 00:58:52,160
Speaker 1: how bad he was, but people didn't think he was

1042
00:58:52,160 --> 00:58:56,080
Speaker 1: going to win anything. He was still in the primary,

1043
00:58:56,520 --> 00:58:58,680
Speaker 1: that was still early in the primaries, and you know,

1044
00:58:59,000 --> 00:59:01,520
Speaker 1: he was still one of sick ten. Yeah, And it's

1045
00:59:01,560 --> 00:59:04,640
Speaker 1: like it's like seeing the Baba Duke. Before you see

1046
00:59:04,680 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 1: the movie, you're just drawing, and then you watch the

1047
00:59:09,840 --> 00:59:16,240
Speaker 1: movie and then you're like, oh no, but the country

1048
00:59:16,360 --> 00:59:18,400
Speaker 1: just had not most of the country hadn't seen, hadn't

1049
00:59:18,400 --> 00:59:23,400
Speaker 1: seen the movie, had been to Toronto, but actually just happened.

1050
00:59:23,720 --> 00:59:28,360
Speaker 1: Just happened. James Franco did very well. James very well,

1051
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:30,720
Speaker 1: and the Lady Ganga documentary did very well. Did you

1052
00:59:30,800 --> 00:59:33,080
Speaker 1: know what won the Audience Award? This is actually kind

1053
00:59:33,080 --> 00:59:38,320
Speaker 1: of interested. It's called Three Billboards, Big Missouri to Francis

1054
00:59:38,440 --> 00:59:41,720
Speaker 1: McDorman movie. It looks great, written by Martin McDonough and

1055
00:59:41,840 --> 00:59:47,960
Speaker 1: apparently it's real and Crtin McDonagh wrote, what else in Bruge?

1056
00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:53,480
Speaker 1: Oh yes, yes, yes, yes, it's fun stuff. Yes, play right.

1057
00:59:53,680 --> 00:59:55,560
Speaker 1: I got him mixed up with who did the pillow man?

1058
00:59:56,840 --> 01:00:01,160
Speaker 1: Martin mcdonna. It was, says producer Joe not quite as fun.

1059
01:00:02,240 --> 01:00:06,240
Speaker 1: Then it just shows young you know, who's so fun?

1060
01:00:08,920 --> 01:00:12,800
Speaker 1: She's so fun. She's studying a new thing to Netflix.

1061
01:00:12,920 --> 01:00:16,080
Speaker 1: Wait do you know? Wait, did you know that? You

1062
01:00:16,120 --> 01:00:20,720
Speaker 1: guys want to watch Moonstruck. I've never seen it? Was

1063
01:00:20,800 --> 01:00:23,880
Speaker 1: very don't really such a good movie? Yes, I remember

1064
01:00:24,080 --> 01:00:26,920
Speaker 1: such a good movie. Yes, it makes you so happy.

1065
01:00:28,280 --> 01:00:30,080
Speaker 1: Share is really good in it. Share it might be

1066
01:00:30,160 --> 01:00:31,720
Speaker 1: the best one in it. And there's a lot of

1067
01:00:31,760 --> 01:00:37,440
Speaker 1: really good people. It's written by a playwright who wrote it, oh,

1068
01:00:37,600 --> 01:00:42,120
Speaker 1: John Patrick Shanley. Yes, yes, and he also wrote Doubt. Yes,

1069
01:00:42,440 --> 01:00:45,240
Speaker 1: but it's really good. I really recommend you watch Moonstruck

1070
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 1: and then listen to that little cultural tip. Will report back.

1071
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:54,520
Speaker 1: It's really funny. There's an Italian grandpa who has five dogs.

1072
01:00:54,840 --> 01:00:58,040
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's so hilarious. There's so many good parts.

1073
01:00:58,160 --> 01:01:01,440
Speaker 1: Snap out of it. The cow. You've seen it, You've

1074
01:01:01,440 --> 01:01:03,959
Speaker 1: seen it, you love it. Share Share is the best

1075
01:01:04,080 --> 01:01:08,120
Speaker 1: one of the of the you know, pantheon of divas.

1076
01:01:08,240 --> 01:01:11,440
Speaker 1: She's really good at everything everything, She's very she's funny

1077
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:15,680
Speaker 1: and good at Twitter. Oh yes, you guys, so she's

1078
01:01:15,720 --> 01:01:17,959
Speaker 1: really bad at putting emojis in the middle of words,

1079
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:22,040
Speaker 1: and as she doesn't necessarily know what, we love her. Okay,

1080
01:01:22,040 --> 01:01:24,080
Speaker 1: it's time to move on. To I don't think so, honey. Now,

1081
01:01:24,240 --> 01:01:25,960
Speaker 1: if you listen to the show, you know this segment.

1082
01:01:26,080 --> 01:01:28,000
Speaker 1: If you are just listening to the show for the

1083
01:01:28,040 --> 01:01:30,480
Speaker 1: first time, you picked a really good one. It's very good. Yeah,

1084
01:01:30,560 --> 01:01:32,760
Speaker 1: And that's our that's our segment where we take one

1085
01:01:32,760 --> 01:01:37,120
Speaker 1: minute to rail against culture. Um. We are so mad

1086
01:01:37,160 --> 01:01:39,840
Speaker 1: about these things. It's time to take one minute to say,

1087
01:01:39,880 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 1: how just how mad? Um? Now, Matt, you said you

1088
01:01:43,800 --> 01:01:46,200
Speaker 1: have something. I do have something. Okay, Okay, I don't

1089
01:01:46,200 --> 01:01:47,640
Speaker 1: know where it will go, but I know what it is.

1090
01:01:47,720 --> 01:01:49,680
Speaker 1: So then I'll put one minute on the clock and Matt,

1091
01:01:50,560 --> 01:01:53,840
Speaker 1: I can't wait to see what you have. Because Matt Rodgers,

1092
01:01:54,000 --> 01:01:56,160
Speaker 1: I don't think so, honey. Time starts now. I don't

1093
01:01:56,160 --> 01:01:58,360
Speaker 1: think so, honey. Woman on the train who locked eyes

1094
01:01:58,440 --> 01:02:01,440
Speaker 1: with me after two other women kissed and rolled her eyes,

1095
01:02:02,120 --> 01:02:07,040
Speaker 1: let me tell you something. I don't know what it

1096
01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:08,520
Speaker 1: wasn't about me to give you an impression that I

1097
01:02:08,560 --> 01:02:10,480
Speaker 1: was gonna share a home of public mobile with you, honey.

1098
01:02:10,600 --> 01:02:14,240
Speaker 1: But I don't think so, honey, because guess what, I'm

1099
01:02:14,280 --> 01:02:19,880
Speaker 1: a most sexual wow man. And I will look at

1100
01:02:19,960 --> 01:02:22,320
Speaker 1: you dead back in your eyes, which you've were old,

1101
01:02:22,720 --> 01:02:27,440
Speaker 1: and I'll tell you with my gays that you can't

1102
01:02:27,480 --> 01:02:30,240
Speaker 1: come for the gays, and I can't believe you, and

1103
01:02:30,320 --> 01:02:34,960
Speaker 1: I think I shamed her adequately. But you're in New York, honey,

1104
01:02:35,560 --> 01:02:38,240
Speaker 1: you're just gonna pick someone and roll your goddamn eyes

1105
01:02:38,320 --> 01:02:40,680
Speaker 1: like E expecting that any old person is going to

1106
01:02:40,760 --> 01:02:45,320
Speaker 1: be doing with you. These were two beautiful lesbian tunny

1107
01:02:45,840 --> 01:02:48,120
Speaker 1: and they loved each other. They were a beautiful biracial

1108
01:02:48,240 --> 01:02:51,640
Speaker 1: couple and I love that. And guess what, maybe it

1109
01:02:51,760 --> 01:02:54,680
Speaker 1: was that that made the woman a little irritated, But

1110
01:02:55,080 --> 01:02:57,160
Speaker 1: I don't know. All I know is, honey, you need

1111
01:02:57,200 --> 01:02:59,680
Speaker 1: to get together. That's one minute. Oh my god, that's

1112
01:03:00,040 --> 01:03:04,680
Speaker 1: setting and looked at me like can you believe this ship?

1113
01:03:05,200 --> 01:03:09,400
Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, get out of here. That's

1114
01:03:09,480 --> 01:03:13,760
Speaker 1: that's that's great, that's really good. Um I don't think so, honey,

1115
01:03:14,880 --> 01:03:19,200
Speaker 1: hold on, hold on to do it, okay, okay, um

1116
01:03:20,560 --> 01:03:22,440
Speaker 1: yeah here we go, all right, here we go. I

1117
01:03:22,440 --> 01:03:24,240
Speaker 1: don't think so many time starts now. I don't think

1118
01:03:24,280 --> 01:03:27,720
Speaker 1: so many unique black runner jeans that are supposed to

1119
01:03:27,800 --> 01:03:31,640
Speaker 1: stretch to fit they tore at the fucking thigh, pelvis,

1120
01:03:32,320 --> 01:03:35,680
Speaker 1: groin area within two weeks. Bitch, I don't think so honey,

1121
01:03:36,000 --> 01:03:41,000
Speaker 1: these little I can say this, these little Chinese and

1122
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:44,680
Speaker 1: children making my pants, and and I don't think so

1123
01:03:44,760 --> 01:03:47,160
Speaker 1: honey myself for buying into the and and and you know,

1124
01:03:47,280 --> 01:03:51,960
Speaker 1: supporting that horrible oppressive structure and institution myself. I don't

1125
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:55,120
Speaker 1: think so honey. Though these pants we're supposed to last

1126
01:03:55,200 --> 01:03:59,000
Speaker 1: me for many, many many days of work, of auditions,

1127
01:03:59,440 --> 01:04:01,680
Speaker 1: all per This is really I don't think so honey

1128
01:04:01,880 --> 01:04:05,480
Speaker 1: for them, for them not being there for me when

1129
01:04:05,520 --> 01:04:09,920
Speaker 1: I needed them most. For them, I invested time, had

1130
01:04:09,960 --> 01:04:12,800
Speaker 1: them tailored to my leg high I have short legs, bitch,

1131
01:04:13,040 --> 01:04:15,919
Speaker 1: and I needed to wait an extra day to give

1132
01:04:16,000 --> 01:04:19,360
Speaker 1: them to unique lo to have the adjustments made seconds.

1133
01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:20,720
Speaker 1: And I don't think so honey of these pants. I

1134
01:04:20,720 --> 01:04:25,320
Speaker 1: don't think so honey. For not being dependable. That's my minute.

1135
01:04:27,560 --> 01:04:30,280
Speaker 1: So many layers. There's a lot going on there, and

1136
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:33,640
Speaker 1: I can my My gift is to be able to

1137
01:04:33,760 --> 01:04:39,240
Speaker 1: connect all those dots gracefully, thank you. And they provoke conversations,

1138
01:04:39,400 --> 01:04:42,560
Speaker 1: and we hope people will converse with us. And we

1139
01:04:42,680 --> 01:04:46,040
Speaker 1: hope Joe's I don't think so honey, it's all we

1140
01:04:46,160 --> 01:04:48,520
Speaker 1: hope it really lives up to what she's seen here.

1141
01:04:49,200 --> 01:04:52,400
Speaker 1: Not do it at all, Joe, this is gonna be

1142
01:04:52,440 --> 01:05:00,520
Speaker 1: one of the best, and I think we should Joe,

1143
01:05:00,560 --> 01:05:03,080
Speaker 1: are you ready? Yeah? This is Joe Firestones. I don't

1144
01:05:03,080 --> 01:05:06,480
Speaker 1: think so, honey. Time starts now. I don't think so, honey.

1145
01:05:07,280 --> 01:05:10,520
Speaker 1: Why can't you eat egg salad and tuna saladub? Yeah?

1146
01:05:11,280 --> 01:05:13,640
Speaker 1: Why can't you? They sell it? Why are you gonna

1147
01:05:13,680 --> 01:05:16,360
Speaker 1: go home to eat it? It's too stinky. I don't

1148
01:05:16,400 --> 01:05:19,400
Speaker 1: know what it smells like. Tuna smells like. We all

1149
01:05:19,480 --> 01:05:22,120
Speaker 1: know what that smells like. I think it's that there's

1150
01:05:22,120 --> 01:05:25,760
Speaker 1: a social stigma. It's two of the main three cold salads.

1151
01:05:26,080 --> 01:05:28,240
Speaker 1: The only other cold salad that we have left his

1152
01:05:28,360 --> 01:05:31,160
Speaker 1: chicken salad, and that's not a salad I want to eat.

1153
01:05:31,560 --> 01:05:34,200
Speaker 1: There's also ham salad, but I don't think that's sold

1154
01:05:34,280 --> 01:05:37,840
Speaker 1: in stores under your I just feel like it's weird

1155
01:05:37,920 --> 01:05:40,360
Speaker 1: that you get dirty looks. If you ate that in

1156
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:43,080
Speaker 1: a room of people, people get mad at you. And

1157
01:05:43,200 --> 01:05:45,600
Speaker 1: that's another up they have that at the Delhi. If

1158
01:05:45,640 --> 01:05:48,600
Speaker 1: they didn't sell it, people obviously are buying it. And

1159
01:05:48,720 --> 01:05:50,920
Speaker 1: where are they eating it? Where are they eating it?

1160
01:05:51,000 --> 01:05:53,440
Speaker 1: If not in work, where are they eating? Are they

1161
01:05:53,480 --> 01:05:56,280
Speaker 1: eating it at home. It's too embarrassing. I don't know

1162
01:05:56,360 --> 01:05:58,560
Speaker 1: why I can't. I try to eat egg salad. Was

1163
01:05:58,600 --> 01:06:02,320
Speaker 1: on a subway and I that kicked out doors are closing,

1164
01:06:02,400 --> 01:06:07,560
Speaker 1: stand clear and that's one minute. Wo. I think that's

1165
01:06:08,080 --> 01:06:12,480
Speaker 1: philth You're disgusting, Joe. Why would chicken? I'm obsessed with

1166
01:06:12,600 --> 01:06:19,080
Speaker 1: chicken salad? Okay, what about like a tuna egg salad.

1167
01:06:19,680 --> 01:06:22,320
Speaker 1: I haven't come across it. And I was like every

1168
01:06:22,400 --> 01:06:30,680
Speaker 1: deys Like, my nephew is like he's three, and he's

1169
01:06:30,880 --> 01:06:34,120
Speaker 1: really cute. He has a really weird way of speaking,

1170
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:37,360
Speaker 1: and he's really specific about his words because he's like

1171
01:06:37,520 --> 01:06:41,840
Speaker 1: learning that. And my my, my sister in love was like, Sammy,

1172
01:06:41,880 --> 01:06:43,920
Speaker 1: what do you want to eat for breakfast? And he

1173
01:06:44,000 --> 01:06:47,600
Speaker 1: goes egg. She does, how many eggs you do? You want?

1174
01:06:47,640 --> 01:06:49,840
Speaker 1: One egg or two eggs? And he goes one egg?

1175
01:06:53,040 --> 01:06:54,600
Speaker 1: And you know what you knew? What do you wanted?

1176
01:06:54,880 --> 01:06:59,520
Speaker 1: What do you want? Communicated it very well. Indeed, I

1177
01:06:59,680 --> 01:07:05,479
Speaker 1: think this trifecta of the salads, the cold salads, chicken

1178
01:07:05,560 --> 01:07:09,040
Speaker 1: wins out. Chicken win's out. You should try chicken salads. Okay,

1179
01:07:09,160 --> 01:07:11,960
Speaker 1: I've tried it. They have really good chicken salad a

1180
01:07:12,000 --> 01:07:15,360
Speaker 1: trader Joe's called wine Country chicken salad, and it's with

1181
01:07:15,680 --> 01:07:22,440
Speaker 1: raisins um delicious delicious mayonnaisees and blends of spices and seasonings,

1182
01:07:22,520 --> 01:07:25,200
Speaker 1: different kinds of mannaise. No, I mean like they seasoned

1183
01:07:25,240 --> 01:07:27,960
Speaker 1: the mayonnaise in such a way that's very good. I

1184
01:07:28,080 --> 01:07:33,720
Speaker 1: never heard it. Mayonaise is absolutely Joe mayonnaise mayonnaise. Do

1185
01:07:33,840 --> 01:07:38,560
Speaker 1: you like? Do you like cold salads? Um? I love

1186
01:07:38,840 --> 01:07:43,960
Speaker 1: tuna fish, and I will frequently enjoy tuna salad if

1187
01:07:44,040 --> 01:07:47,800
Speaker 1: there's not just a tuna fish. Okay, you eat plain

1188
01:07:49,080 --> 01:07:51,600
Speaker 1: out of the can. I take it out of the can,

1189
01:07:51,680 --> 01:07:53,760
Speaker 1: I put it in a nice bowl. I mixing some

1190
01:07:53,920 --> 01:07:55,920
Speaker 1: mayo and some mustard, and I'll eat it with a fork.

1191
01:07:56,360 --> 01:07:59,959
Speaker 1: You make your own. That's tuna salada. But that's truna

1192
01:08:00,040 --> 01:08:07,720
Speaker 1: salad by itself. But the salad you need a little

1193
01:08:07,720 --> 01:08:10,960
Speaker 1: bit of greens in it, honey. That makes it in

1194
01:08:11,160 --> 01:08:17,759
Speaker 1: a salad by definition, a salads creams. But is tragical.

1195
01:08:20,400 --> 01:08:23,880
Speaker 1: I think the title of this episode is tragical. Tragical

1196
01:08:25,280 --> 01:08:27,800
Speaker 1: or what was the song called Bitches and Bitches at

1197
01:08:27,800 --> 01:08:31,800
Speaker 1: the Beach. At the beach, I think it should be tragical,

1198
01:08:31,960 --> 01:08:34,360
Speaker 1: tragical bit of the beach. We really didn't get past

1199
01:08:34,400 --> 01:08:37,240
Speaker 1: the chorus. No, yeah, it's true. Right, I feel like

1200
01:08:37,280 --> 01:08:41,240
Speaker 1: I've been really shot down multiple times. Say something and

1201
01:08:41,280 --> 01:08:44,160
Speaker 1: we'll encourage you. I think the title of this episode

1202
01:08:44,160 --> 01:08:47,040
Speaker 1: should be a bitch at the beach. You know what?

1203
01:08:47,280 --> 01:08:51,960
Speaker 1: That's fair? Say something else? I did I talk about

1204
01:08:52,000 --> 01:08:55,400
Speaker 1: this last episode. My bowels are still I started taking

1205
01:08:55,439 --> 01:08:59,920
Speaker 1: probiotics today. I haven't done the doing it bad bows

1206
01:09:00,560 --> 01:09:02,920
Speaker 1: the worst they've ever been. I've very explosed to diarrhea

1207
01:09:03,080 --> 01:09:06,000
Speaker 1: since I moved to New York. I'm so sorry. It's

1208
01:09:06,320 --> 01:09:09,760
Speaker 1: something I'm used to, and um, I think that it's

1209
01:09:10,040 --> 01:09:12,800
Speaker 1: just kind of becomes part of your routine. But you know,

1210
01:09:13,400 --> 01:09:17,160
Speaker 1: I've been talking about this. Usually when I have my diarrhea, afterwards,

1211
01:09:17,240 --> 01:09:21,920
Speaker 1: you feel so much better. Maybe not necessarily this these

1212
01:09:21,960 --> 01:09:24,200
Speaker 1: past two weeks, I've had to go at least twice

1213
01:09:24,240 --> 01:09:27,280
Speaker 1: consecutively within ten minutes, and then you're exhausted, and you're

1214
01:09:27,320 --> 01:09:30,920
Speaker 1: exhausted and you feel like there's a demon inside your bowels.

1215
01:09:31,160 --> 01:09:35,200
Speaker 1: Yeah you got it, Maybe you got I don't know. Well,

1216
01:09:35,400 --> 01:09:37,560
Speaker 1: you know what. I took a nap tonight after I

1217
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:42,360
Speaker 1: shout out of my globular world, and I think that

1218
01:09:42,560 --> 01:09:44,519
Speaker 1: this is this is this is my journey. That is

1219
01:09:44,600 --> 01:09:47,960
Speaker 1: like Matt just learned all his favorite words and put

1220
01:09:48,000 --> 01:09:56,360
Speaker 1: them all in one center. I just I'm learning. That

1221
01:09:56,560 --> 01:10:01,400
Speaker 1: was nice. I believe that I will me Joe. We

1222
01:10:01,479 --> 01:10:03,479
Speaker 1: will miss Joe so much. I believe I had so

1223
01:10:03,600 --> 01:10:05,360
Speaker 1: much fun doing this. Thank you so much, Joe. We

1224
01:10:05,439 --> 01:10:08,439
Speaker 1: love you so fun. Joe. Where can people find you?

1225
01:10:08,800 --> 01:10:16,240
Speaker 1: You're not on social media very much. You can't find guys.

1226
01:10:16,360 --> 01:10:20,120
Speaker 1: I'm Matt Rogers and our episode was with Joe Firestone.

1227
01:10:20,160 --> 01:10:24,599
Speaker 1: Thank you, Forever Dog. Thank you listeners, Bye, thanks thanks

1228
01:10:24,800 --> 01:10:29,559
Speaker 1: a listeners. I bet I bet they don't even listen

1229
01:10:29,680 --> 01:10:34,240
Speaker 1: to see what happens. And great education. Third grade reading level.

1230
01:10:34,280 --> 01:10:37,120
Speaker 1: I couldn't even read the Hard Harry Potters, the One,

1231
01:10:37,280 --> 01:10:40,759
Speaker 1: the hard Ones, the ones want Everything passed that second

1232
01:10:40,800 --> 01:10:48,439
Speaker 1: half before Lord Crux. This has been a Forever Dog

1233
01:10:48,479 --> 01:10:53,000
Speaker 1: production executive produced by Joe Celio, Alex Ramsay, and Brett Bom.

1234
01:10:53,479 --> 01:10:56,880
Speaker 1: For more podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Productions dot com.

1235
01:11:00,000 --> 01:11:00,200
Speaker 1: Four