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Speaker 1: On this week's episode of Cultivating her Space.

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Speaker 2: And somebody just looking at your face and saying, I

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Speaker 2: understand you.

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Speaker 3: And that's all that said. That connection and that.

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Speaker 2: Divinity truly is from whatever higher source that you believe

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Speaker 2: in that connects us all. It's a visceral feeling and

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Speaker 2: I think that that's what sisterhood is.

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Speaker 1: Today's episode is sure to provide you with motivation, inspiration,

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Speaker 1: or a fresh perspective. If you have any AHA moments

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Speaker 1: or appreciate anything from this episode, please leave us a

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Speaker 1: review to let us know we're on the right track. Also,

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Speaker 1: we've release episodes every Friday, so be sure to subscribe

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Speaker 1: on iTunes and visit cultivatinghurspace dot com to access our

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Speaker 1: exclusive after show and other bonus content from the Patreon tab.

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Speaker 4: Welcome to Cultivating her Space, a podcast dedicated to uplifting

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Speaker 4: women like you.

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Speaker 1: We're your hosts.

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Speaker 4: Doctor Dominique Bussard, a college professor and psychologist.

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Speaker 5: And Terry Lomax, a techy and motivational speaker. In a

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Speaker 5: world where black women are often misrepresented and misunderstood, please

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Speaker 5: join us as we initiate authentic conversations on everything from

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Speaker 5: five roids to fake friends and create a safe space

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Speaker 5: where black women can just be Hey, lady, it's Terry

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Speaker 5: here from the Cultivating Hairspace podcast. I'm hosting a free

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Speaker 5: podcasting masterclass where I'm going to teach you how to

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Speaker 5: create your impactful podcast and how you can generate multiple

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Speaker 5: streams of income. You can visit podcast with Terry dot

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Speaker 5: com to register for free. I hope to see you there.

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Speaker 5: All right, lady, Today we have a very very very

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Speaker 5: special guest in Cultivating her Space. Bethany Hawkins is the

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Speaker 5: CEO and founder of Crackers and Soup. Crackers and Soup

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Speaker 5: is a podcast management company that mission is to assist

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Speaker 5: women podcasts that need the best F word known in

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Speaker 5: the English language freedom, Okay freedom. Since its inception in

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Speaker 5: twenty nineteen, Crackers and Soup has worked on over fifty podcasts,

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Speaker 5: from creating cover art to assisting with post production and

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Speaker 5: everything in between, including launches. She has worked on podcasts

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Speaker 5: that have won awards, including her own podcasts that have

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Speaker 5: three million listeners ten thousand downloads a month, and one

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Speaker 5: podcast she's worked for has been featured in a Princeton course.

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Speaker 5: Bethany is also the host of the award winning podcast

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Speaker 5: Chatting over Chowder. Chatting over Cholda is a podcast where

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Speaker 5: two minority women talk to other women in the podcasting

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Speaker 5: industry about what podcasts they listen to.

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Speaker 1: Are Chatting over Chowder. Bethany, welcome cultivating her space.

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Speaker 3: I'm home. It's my ladies, love ladies. And people will

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Speaker 3: be like, who this bitch.

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Speaker 2: I worked with you when I first started out, Terry,

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Speaker 2: and it was just like a beautiful and I was like,

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Speaker 2: all of.

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Speaker 3: My clients are like this, They're gonna be amazing. And

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Speaker 3: then you know that didn't happen.

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Speaker 5: But really quick breath and for context, I think it

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Speaker 5: will be nice to let people know how we all

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Speaker 5: are connected.

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Speaker 1: Maybe talk a little bit about the baby shower.

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Speaker 5: Someone want to talk a little bit about that, and

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Speaker 5: then we'll go into our quote of the day and

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Speaker 5: all that good stuff.

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Speaker 2: Terry, you and I met on a complete it was

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Speaker 2: like a complete blind date and connection.

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Speaker 3: So you needed a virtual.

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Speaker 2: Assistant and I was doing virtual assistance at that time,

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Speaker 2: and somebody threw out my name and You're like, okay,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to send you and eat her an email

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Speaker 2: And I just happened to be looking at my email

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Speaker 2: that night and I immediately responded back and it was

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Speaker 2: like nine thirty my time, and we set up a

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Speaker 2: discovery call. And during the discovery call, I had my

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Speaker 2: uterus necklace on and you.

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Speaker 3: Were like, are you wearing a uterus necklace? And I

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Speaker 3: was like yuh.

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Speaker 2: I just felt like empowered to wear this femininity and fertility.

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Speaker 2: And she was like, I'm trying to get pregnant and

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Speaker 2: I was like, well, you are a creep and we

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Speaker 2: are connected and we're destined and this is going to happen.

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Speaker 2: And then you were like, okay, Bat, You're going to

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Speaker 2: be my virtual assistant. So then you taught me asana

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Speaker 2: and asana is like my whole boo now and I

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Speaker 2: can't even imagine my life without it, and that's totally

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Speaker 2: due to you, Terry Lil Max. And then you were like, hey,

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Speaker 2: can you help with the Patreon? So then I started

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Speaker 2: working on Yell's Patreon and then I started like sweating

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Speaker 2: doctor dom from like Afar. And then because I was

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Speaker 2: all up in Terry's uterus at the time, I was like, hey, boo,

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Speaker 2: you pregnant and you were like, why would you say that?

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Speaker 2: And I was like, just don't buy tampons, and she

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Speaker 2: was like, no, but I am pregnant, and I was like,

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Speaker 2: I'm a creepy bitch.

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Speaker 3: So that.

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Speaker 2: So then doctor Dom was throwing you a virtual baby shower,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, Dom, I need to get on this.

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Speaker 2: So then we had your baby shower and you had

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Speaker 2: my rhetory and it was beautiful. And now she's like

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Speaker 2: twenty five because the time goes by so quickly. And

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Speaker 2: then I just solely concentrated and focused on podcasting, and

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Speaker 2: here we are today.

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Speaker 1: Here we are today.

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Speaker 5: So that's like our little short story, ladies, so you

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Speaker 5: can kind of get context. Thank you for that, Bethany,

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Speaker 5: and doctor Donald's gonna take it off with the quote

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Speaker 5: of the day.

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Speaker 4: I picked this quote of today like literally before we

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Speaker 4: hopped on this call, and I think that things happen

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Speaker 4: how they're supposed to. Things happen for a reason, and

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Speaker 4: so I'm anticipating a bomb ass conversation just based on

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Speaker 4: how we are showing up right now and how we've

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Speaker 4: gotten to this space. So our quote of the day,

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Speaker 4: the success of every woman should be the inspiration to another.

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Speaker 4: We should raise each other up. Make sure you're very courageous,

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Speaker 4: be strong, be kind, and above all, be humble from

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Speaker 4: Serena Williams. Ladies, today we are talking about the importance

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Speaker 4: of sisterhood, and in just these first few minutes we

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Speaker 4: have already seen the importance of sisterhood. But Bethany, when

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Speaker 4: you hear this quote from Serenum, what comes up for you.

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Speaker 2: The bringing each other up and the narrative of women,

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Speaker 2: especially Black women, is that we're argumentative and that we

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Speaker 2: are competitive, and that we are vile to each other.

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Speaker 2: When that is such the furthest stereotype from the truth.

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Speaker 2: We always come together as a collective. There's always an

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Speaker 2: understanding and an appreciation. And I think that it is

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Speaker 2: to the betterment of white males if there is a

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Speaker 2: competition between us instead of really honoring the love and

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Speaker 2: the spark and the life that we each give each

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Speaker 2: other when it's needed.

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Speaker 5: That's beautiful and that makes perfect sense. And girl, I

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Speaker 5: cannot agree more. I love what you said earlier too.

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Speaker 5: I think you just painting a picture of how we

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Speaker 5: all got connected, Adam said, is like a beautiful tribute

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Speaker 5: to sisterhood and friendship, and like how that's shown up

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Speaker 5: for us in our lives. And you know, I got

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Speaker 5: a little teary eyut and you were telling telling that story,

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Speaker 5: just bringing everything full circle. So when you think about

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Speaker 5: sisterhood and friendship, what does that mean to you.

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Speaker 2: I think it's not only just you know, Key keying

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Speaker 2: it up. I think it's also learning from each other.

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Speaker 2: And Terry, I used to tell you all the time,

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Speaker 2: there's so much that you taught me, just not in

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Speaker 2: organization and through the program a sign up, but through

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Speaker 2: podcasting and how to show up as a professional and

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Speaker 2: how to you know, get my shit together. Because when

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Speaker 2: we first started, I was so green, not only in

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Speaker 2: the podcasting industry, but also just as an entrepreneur. I

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Speaker 2: had worked in corporate and I know we're kind of

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Speaker 2: getting into my backstory a little bit, but I had

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Speaker 2: worked in corporate for almost twenty years, so coming from

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Speaker 2: that place and being an entrepreneur, I knew that that's

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Speaker 2: something that I was called to do. But I didn't

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Speaker 2: know what that looked like. I didn't know what that

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Speaker 2: felt like. But I knew that I wanted to work

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Speaker 2: with women that I was not only going to be

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Speaker 2: able to assist, but I was also going to be

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Speaker 2: able to learn from. And I think that that's what

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Speaker 2: sisterhood is it's holding each other when you're overwhelmed and

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Speaker 2: you're distract and when we were working together, it was

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Speaker 2: when all at George Floyd's stuff was happening. It was

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Speaker 2: a powerful moment in history, especially for black people and

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Speaker 2: being able to say to each other, I can't do

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Speaker 2: this today. Please just hold space for me. That's all

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Speaker 2: that I can do. And somebody just looking at your

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Speaker 2: face and saying I understand you, and that's all that said.

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Speaker 2: That connection and that divinity truly is from whatever higher

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Speaker 2: source that you believe in that connects us all. It's

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Speaker 2: a visceral feeling. And I think that that's what sisterhood

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Speaker 2: is like. When you have a weird, sick sense that

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Speaker 2: like your girlfriend needs a phone call from you, that sisterhood,

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Speaker 2: when you champion somebody that's not even in the room,

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Speaker 2: that doesn't even have, let alone all ten toes, doesn't

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Speaker 2: have one pinky toe in the room, and you say,

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Speaker 2: you know what, I know this woman, she's amazing.

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Speaker 3: She can absolutely assist you that sisterhood.

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Speaker 2: Getting into a dis agreement and then two weeks later

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Speaker 2: coming back and be like I was trifling. I'm sorry

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Speaker 2: that sisterhood and that that other person say you were trifling.

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Speaker 3: I accept your apology. That sisterhood I love that.

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Speaker 4: And as you were saying that, like I was recalling

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Speaker 4: like various moments in my life with different friends and

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Speaker 4: sister friends and sisters, and how all of that rings

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Speaker 4: so true for us. And so you defined sisterhood.

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Speaker 3: You told us some of your origin story.

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Speaker 4: But Bethany, can you take us back, like back back

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Speaker 4: to little Bethany, little kindergarten Bethany, maybe tell us share

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Speaker 4: with us your origin story.

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Speaker 2: Oh, this is when doctor don is gonna get real doctor,

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Speaker 2: because when I who was in kindergarten, I did not speak.

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Speaker 2: And I mean this was in like the early eighties

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Speaker 2: and autism wasn't a thing as it is now. But

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Speaker 2: at that point my pediatrician was really progressive and he

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Speaker 2: had said to my mother, if this continues, we're gonna

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Speaker 2: have to have her check for autism. And it's not

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Speaker 2: that I was autistic. I definitely have anxiety and a

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Speaker 2: lot of those characteristic traits. I just didn't want to

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Speaker 2: talk to anybody, like there was nothing that I had

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Speaker 2: to say to nobody, Like I was good.

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Speaker 3: I was just playing with.

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Speaker 2: My toys and I was in kindergarten. I was I

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Speaker 2: was reading, like I was a prolific reader. So I look,

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Speaker 2: I was like, bet, you just do you and I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna do me.

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Speaker 3: And we Gucci. And the only reason.

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Speaker 2: Why I truly like started talking and coming out of

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Speaker 2: my shell was because I wanted a phone in my room.

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Speaker 2: And if I had a phone, like I needed friends

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Speaker 2: to talk to. So that I was like, well, I

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Speaker 2: guess I.

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Speaker 3: Should start talking to people.

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Speaker 2: So I kind of like ventured out of my shell

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Speaker 2: in like fourth and fifth grade because I wanted a

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Speaker 2: phone in my room. This was before cell phone, you

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Speaker 2: young wober snappers, like, this is when you had a

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Speaker 2: legitimate phone life. And I, you know, my parents were

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Speaker 2: very hard working, and they always had this ideology that

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Speaker 2: I was going to get good grades and I was

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Speaker 2: going to go to college, which is a lot of

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Speaker 2: black families, this is what you're gonna do.

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Speaker 3: We didn't graduate from college.

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Speaker 2: I was the first person in my immediately immediate family

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Speaker 2: to graduate from college, actually to go to college, to

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Speaker 2: graduate from college, to.

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Speaker 3: Do really well.

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Speaker 2: And then I studied in criminal justice because I was

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Speaker 2: interested in the criminal justice field and I knew that

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Speaker 2: it was like a safe and secure job, so I

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Speaker 2: did that. I graduated, I started working at the District

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Speaker 2: Attorney's office. One of the eighty's decided that he wanted

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Speaker 2: to go out on his own asked me to be

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Speaker 2: his office manager paralegal. So I went over there. I

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Speaker 2: was with him for eight years, and then the DA's

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Speaker 2: office called me back and they were like, hey, can

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Speaker 2: you come back because we have created this position and

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Speaker 2: we have you in mind. And I was like okay,

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Speaker 2: So I went back over there and then that's the

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Speaker 2: office that I left. So truly, in eighteen plus years,

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Speaker 2: I only worked in two offices, and during that time

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Speaker 2: I kept moving up the ladder, and by the time

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Speaker 2: I left, I was I was the office manager. I

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Speaker 2: was handling million dollar budgets I had. I was supervising

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Speaker 2: all of the support staff members. I was booking all

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Speaker 2: of the travel arrangements for the victims to come in.

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Speaker 2: We worked with all felonies from a habitual offender, which

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Speaker 2: are felonious driving offenses, all the way to attempted murder

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Speaker 2: and everything in between. The only thing we didn't do

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Speaker 2: was murder, and that's because I went to the Attorney

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Speaker 2: General's office. But as the years started progressing. Criminal justice

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Speaker 2: is a very strong burnout career. And I used to

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Speaker 2: say too when I was vetting people, because we have

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Speaker 2: legal systems coming in and out all the time.

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Speaker 3: Because it's very overwhelming.

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Speaker 2: There's a lot of documentation, there's a lot of horrible

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Speaker 2: things that you're reading, And I would say, how do

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Speaker 2: you handle stress? Because nobody's coming into this office because

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Speaker 2: they had the best day of their life.

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Speaker 3: And as I started.

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Speaker 2: Continuing on, I was like, I can't do this, but

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Speaker 2: I work very well under stress. I am like I

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Speaker 2: thrive in any condition that I have to thrive in.

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Speaker 2: But it got to the point where my mental health

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Speaker 2: was so exhausted that I was having like pianic attacks

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Speaker 2: every time I was driving to work. And then I

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Speaker 2: had to suck it out. Butter Cup and I had

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Speaker 2: to do what I had to do. And how I

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Speaker 2: got into podcasting was three years before I was like

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Speaker 2: doses bitches about one of my friends, Megan came up

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Speaker 2: to me and she knows that I'm obsessed with Leva Burton,

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Speaker 2: like obsessed.

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Speaker 3: It's a little creepy. I'm like, that's my You can't

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Speaker 3: tell me nothing. We're blood. He just don't know he's

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Speaker 3: missed all my birthdays. But that's okay. He's gonna make

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Speaker 3: it up to me.

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Speaker 2: So she came up to me and she was like, hey,

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Speaker 2: have you heard of the Varburton Reads. It's a podcast

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Speaker 2: and I'm like, what the hell is the podcast? And

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Speaker 2: she took my phone and she was like, download the app.

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Speaker 2: Here's how you can listen. And it was a rap.

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Speaker 3: From there. I started consuming.

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Speaker 2: Support a sexy with Elaine Flucker, and I was like, Oh,

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Speaker 2: there is a whole litany of strong black woman at

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Speaker 2: my disposal that I can listen to literally eight hours

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Speaker 2: a day while I'm in this piece of shit position,

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Speaker 2: while this old crotchty white man is asking me if

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Speaker 2: I'm celebrating Kwanza because I'm wearing brown.

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Speaker 3: I was like, ah, what I can hide here? This

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Speaker 3: is amazing.

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Speaker 2: And then I said to my husband. I was like,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to quit my job and he was like

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Speaker 2: what we are? Like we're not a wealthy family, Like

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Speaker 2: we are two family income, we have children, we have

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Speaker 2: a mortgage and he was like and I said, I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna I'm going to create a business. And I did that,

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Speaker 2: like I hustled. I created a website I learned business.

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Speaker 2: I went business courses online. I took like a podcast

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Speaker 2: course which wasn't very good, and I and I submitted

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Speaker 2: my resignation letter and I was like, well, I'm going

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Speaker 2: to bet on myself. I don't know anybody in the

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Speaker 2: podcast and community. I'm going to bet on myself and

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna do well. And last year alone, we made

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Speaker 2: six figures in my business.

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Speaker 3: We're on.

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Speaker 2: Go.

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Speaker 5: Hey, that is incredible, but me self inspiring. I mean

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Speaker 5: just to see the full certain of the full circle story,

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Speaker 5: it's just.

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Speaker 1: Like, wow, how did you do it? Like what do

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Speaker 1: you think?

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Speaker 5: Because I think a lot of people are in positions

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Speaker 5: where they don't enjoy their work right, like their day job.

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Speaker 5: And I know for a long time I was in

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Speaker 5: that space too, of like calling it my dream funder.

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Speaker 1: This is the thing that's funding the side.

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Speaker 5: So but like, what do you believe it takes for

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Speaker 5: you to actually take the leap and go out and

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Speaker 5: launch into the deep.

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Speaker 2: For me, because I swear like I am a sadist,

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Speaker 2: because I will just keep doing painful things and continue

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Speaker 2: to do it and do it and do it and

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Speaker 2: do it, and I'll be like, I know it's torture

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Speaker 2: in me.

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Speaker 3: I know it.

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Speaker 2: Hurts, but if it's not physical, I'm like, I won't

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Speaker 2: really try to change in like, stability is a huge

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Speaker 2: thing for me. Coming back to sisterhoods. I was at

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Speaker 2: my friend's house yesterday and she was like, you collect

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Speaker 2: people and you keep them forever, And I was like,

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Speaker 2: I truly do. Like once I connect with you, you

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Speaker 2: are my whole heart, Like I will keep you until

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Speaker 2: the end of time. I will celebrate you, I will

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Speaker 2: cry with you, can when you get sucked into my world,

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Speaker 2: because it's a vortex that you're never climbing out.

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Speaker 3: So in order for me to actually take the leap,

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Speaker 3: it truly had to.

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Speaker 2: Be at a point where I was in I was

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Speaker 2: in such a mental despair that I knew that I

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Speaker 2: was like contemplating harming myself. And I was so energy

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Speaker 2: depleted that I couldn't engage with my children the way

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Speaker 2: I wanted to. I couldn't engage with my husband. I

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Speaker 2: was just so exhausted from being in that space that

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Speaker 2: I would literally like cook dinner and go to bed,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, I don't think that this is

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Speaker 2: what life is supposed to be. This can't be it

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Speaker 2: but I saw my parents do that, like I saw

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Speaker 2: my parents be in that, and I never knew.

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Speaker 3: Anybody really.

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Speaker 2: That was an entrepreneur, so I didn't have anybody to

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Speaker 2: ask questions to.

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Speaker 3: I didn't have anybody to look up to.

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Speaker 2: So if somebody is in that space, you have to

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Speaker 2: determine a couple of things. Do you have the bandwidth

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Speaker 2: to keep doing it and looking at and look at

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Speaker 2: that position as an investment into what you're creating. If

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Speaker 2: you do, stay because you're getting money, work at night

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Speaker 2: when you get home, work for your dreams, but also

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Speaker 2: take a rest when needed. But if you're at a

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Speaker 2: point mentally, first off, go see a therapist, have somebody

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Speaker 2: that you can talk about with, and then come up

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Speaker 2: with a plan. Because if you don't have a plan

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Speaker 2: and you're just like you're cool, You're cool, you cool,

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Speaker 2: fuck you buy, it's going to be a lot more

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Speaker 2: stress full when you don't have money to pay your mortgage,

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Speaker 2: or you don't have money to pay for food, or

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Speaker 2: if you have children, and like, if you don't have

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Speaker 2: a plan in action, So it always like bet on

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Speaker 2: yourself even if you don't think you can do it.

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Speaker 2: If you don't have any alternative, you got to do it.

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Speaker 2: You don't want to be like that person that's living

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Speaker 2: under a bridge. And also, you can always get like

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Speaker 2: a regular nine to five job if you already have

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Speaker 2: that career in that history, you already have a phenomenal resume.

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Speaker 2: I knew at the end of the day, I can

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Speaker 2: always go back and get a position at an office

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Speaker 2: anywhere because of my resume.

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Speaker 3: And I was like, but do I want to.

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Speaker 2: Or do I want to have control of who I

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Speaker 2: want to engage with, who I want to work with,

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Speaker 2: who I want as my team members, who I want

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Speaker 2: to champion. Who I want to make sure that they've

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Speaker 2: always has heard who I get excited to listen to

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Speaker 2: their editing for six hours. Or I can sit behind

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Speaker 2: a desk and be like, Okay, I'm guaranteed to paycheck.

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Speaker 3: You have to determine what your work is.

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Speaker 4: Ooh okay, so many gems dropped in that. One thing

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Speaker 4: I do want to kind of circle back to or

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Speaker 4: bring into the conversation is during this process where you're

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Speaker 4: like peace out nine to five, how did your sister

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Speaker 4: friends help you in this process? Because sisterhood is so

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Speaker 4: important and it's during times like these at least that

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Speaker 4: I found where sisterhood really matters, and so can you

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Speaker 4: share with us the importance of sisterhood in this piece

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Speaker 4: of your journey.

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Speaker 2: So my rider dies like my best friend since freshman

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Speaker 2: year in college, Keisha.

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Speaker 3: She was just like what are you doing?

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Speaker 2: And she's my voice of reason and I was like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna do this, and she was like okay, all right,

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Speaker 2: and I was like yeah, and I know.

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Speaker 3: And then my mom was like what.

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Speaker 2: Because now at this point, like I'm forty three, so

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Speaker 2: like my mom was my friend, like, so I'll tell her.

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Speaker 3: She was like I okay, Like she was scared.

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Speaker 2: She was nervous like any like black mothers, well, like

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Speaker 2: aetny mother is like they're worried for the kids.

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Speaker 3: And my niece was like, okay, that's cool.

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Speaker 2: Like my other friends were like okay, because again none

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Speaker 2: of us had entrepreneurs in her life.

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Speaker 3: Like it was like I was like, okay, I'm.

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Speaker 2: Going to go hang gliding for like fifteen years and

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Speaker 2: in elettlement, We're like what is just what are you

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Speaker 2: talking about? So I have to say they were supporting,

408
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:02,679
Speaker 2: but they were like nervous for me, which I like,

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Speaker 2: I get and I appreciate.

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Speaker 3: However, Comma. This is where the gem is.

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Speaker 2: Find your people online, find support groups that are not

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Speaker 2: only aligned in your mission, but you can learn from them.

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Speaker 2: So if you're going into I don't know, if you

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Speaker 2: want to leave your job because you want to crochet,

415
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 2: don't just join groups on crocheting. Join groups on business,

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Speaker 2: Join groups on finance, join groups on entrepreneurship in addition

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Speaker 2: to joining crocheting groups, because you need all of those

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00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:54,199
Speaker 2: things in order to operate appropriately and to thrive in

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Speaker 2: your business. Like you have to know what your state

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Speaker 2: taxes are. You have to know what your federal tax

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Speaker 2: You have to know the difference between an employee and

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Speaker 2: a contractor. If you start getting larger and you need

423
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:09,080
Speaker 2: to onboard help, you need to know what an sop is.

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00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,160
Speaker 2: You need to be able to articulate to somebody how

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Speaker 2: you go about doing the things that you're doing. All

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Speaker 2: of these things aren't covered in stitching, right, They're just

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Speaker 2: not covered in crocheting.

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Speaker 3: Like crocheting, they're like, okay, you use.

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Speaker 2: The needle and the yarn and this is how you

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Speaker 2: I don't know, weave a basket. I don't know what

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Speaker 2: you do in crochet. I don't cochet, Like I don't

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Speaker 2: know why I use that as example. I can't crochet

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Speaker 2: to save my life. If it was like, make a

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Speaker 2: glover die, I'd be like, well, let me dig my

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Speaker 2: own hole. I can't make a glow. But all of

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Speaker 2: those things are proud of business. And so that's what

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Speaker 2: I did.

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Speaker 3: I found.

439
00:25:47,119 --> 00:25:50,520
Speaker 2: I found groups that I really loved talking to the

440
00:25:50,560 --> 00:25:54,240
Speaker 2: women and being online with them and seeing their and

441
00:25:54,240 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 2: they're just like watching at first and seeing their personalities

442
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:02,520
Speaker 2: and then seeing, Okay, this is somebody who I feel

443
00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:05,680
Speaker 2: like I can jive with, and then doing a discovery

444
00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:07,760
Speaker 2: call and be like, can we do a coffee and chat?

445
00:26:08,119 --> 00:26:14,480
Speaker 2: Like with nothing, no intentions behind it, just to get

446
00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 2: to know people.

447
00:26:16,760 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 3: And if you have.

448
00:26:19,920 --> 00:26:23,600
Speaker 2: The intention of just getting to know people on just

449
00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:28,320
Speaker 2: a basic human level, it's not even like a life hack.

450
00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:32,720
Speaker 3: It's just being a human. If you're just a human.

451
00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:35,280
Speaker 2: To somebody else, they will and they're like a human

452
00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,760
Speaker 2: to you. You start developing a bond, and then you

453
00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:42,480
Speaker 2: start seeing opportunities for them, and then you start seeing

454
00:26:42,480 --> 00:26:45,119
Speaker 2: opportunities where you can work together, and then you start

455
00:26:46,040 --> 00:26:49,400
Speaker 2: sharing with them and you start shouting out their name,

456
00:26:49,520 --> 00:26:51,320
Speaker 2: and then they start shouting out your name, and then

457
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:54,120
Speaker 2: when opportunities arise, you're the first person that they want

458
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 2: to work with, not because you did it in such

459
00:26:56,480 --> 00:27:02,160
Speaker 2: a sneaky, slimy like way, but just because you want

460
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:05,240
Speaker 2: to see this person achieve greatness.

461
00:27:05,800 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 5: That's some game right there. Okay, you drop more gems

462
00:27:09,640 --> 00:27:10,000
Speaker 5: I do.

463
00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:10,560
Speaker 1: You kind of.

464
00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 5: Answered our next question, But I want to dive into

465
00:27:13,400 --> 00:27:16,360
Speaker 5: this idea around people. You know how it is when

466
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:17,959
Speaker 5: we're adults and people are like, it's hard to make

467
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:20,280
Speaker 5: friends as adults, right, especially when we think about COVID

468
00:27:20,280 --> 00:27:20,800
Speaker 5: and a lot of.

469
00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:22,440
Speaker 1: Us just being at home nowadays.

470
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:24,239
Speaker 5: But I think about some of the folks that I

471
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,880
Speaker 5: know who say, you know, I don't really have those

472
00:27:26,960 --> 00:27:30,159
Speaker 5: long lasting friendships that came from childhood or from college.

473
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,239
Speaker 5: Maybe I didn't go to college. Can you share some

474
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:36,040
Speaker 5: other best practices on how to make friends and cultivate

475
00:27:36,119 --> 00:27:39,720
Speaker 5: sisterhood as adults. You shared a great tactic about reaching

476
00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:42,320
Speaker 5: out to people in groups, But do you have any language.

477
00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:44,359
Speaker 5: Maybe that's someone who's listening, can like pick up and

478
00:27:44,480 --> 00:27:46,159
Speaker 5: let me go send this message that best that they

479
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:48,800
Speaker 5: just said that I can use if you feel awkward

480
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 5: or like you don't really know how to initiate that conversation.

481
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:55,800
Speaker 5: If you're interested in like befriending someone online.

482
00:27:56,359 --> 00:27:59,000
Speaker 3: Find a place where you both can meet.

483
00:28:00,160 --> 00:28:04,560
Speaker 2: So if you are in a group on you know, business,

484
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:09,240
Speaker 2: and you're kind of navigating through the very first steps

485
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,520
Speaker 2: and you see somebody who is offering numerous advice over

486
00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:15,320
Speaker 2: and over again, reach out to them and say, I

487
00:28:15,359 --> 00:28:17,880
Speaker 2: love what you're saying in the group. This, this, I'm

488
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:22,320
Speaker 2: going to implement this idea. This was so fantastic. Do

489
00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:24,119
Speaker 2: you have an account like, would you mind being my

490
00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:27,280
Speaker 2: accountability partner? I would love to meet with you like

491
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 2: once a month and maybe share ideas and maybe I

492
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:32,959
Speaker 2: can help you as well. I know I'm just starting

493
00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:36,719
Speaker 2: off and you're more advanced than me, but everybody can

494
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:42,400
Speaker 2: learn from everybody. So finding those people that like not

495
00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:48,560
Speaker 2: only are willing to offer advice, but also that you

496
00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:53,520
Speaker 2: feel that you could jive with. I think the most

497
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:56,800
Speaker 2: important thing out of all of this in getting adult

498
00:28:56,800 --> 00:29:00,880
Speaker 2: friendships is knowing who you are. If you don't know

499
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:05,120
Speaker 2: who you are, you can't attract the people that you

500
00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:11,080
Speaker 2: need to attract. It's a goosebumps when you find your

501
00:29:11,120 --> 00:29:18,560
Speaker 2: sister friend. It is literally a physical feeling like spirit

502
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:22,000
Speaker 2: is coming and touching you and touching them and it's

503
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:27,920
Speaker 2: like I've known you in another life. So my tip,

504
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,200
Speaker 2: know who you are and know what you want and

505
00:29:31,360 --> 00:29:34,880
Speaker 2: start complimenting, Like don't just be like sneezy, be like, oh,

506
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 2: I think you're really great, Like teach me something for free,

507
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:43,800
Speaker 2: Like don't be that person, but have a genuine interest

508
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:45,160
Speaker 2: in who they are.

509
00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:48,280
Speaker 3: And have them have a genuine interest in you. And

510
00:29:48,360 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 3: you know if you're being truthful.

511
00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 2: You know when someone's being shady and someone's taking you

512
00:29:53,640 --> 00:29:56,120
Speaker 2: for a ride, or you know, if someone's definitely like

513
00:29:56,360 --> 00:30:00,000
Speaker 2: definitely down for you. You know, it's like the same thing

514
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:01,640
Speaker 2: I would like a hugging up with some dude that

515
00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:04,800
Speaker 2: you thought was cute and then you know he's mad shady.

516
00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:07,360
Speaker 3: You knew he was shady, you.

517
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 2: Lie to himself, was like, I'm gonna make him not shady, girl.

518
00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:12,680
Speaker 2: He was shady when he met Yeah, he's gonna be

519
00:30:12,680 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 2: shady when he's with Yet it's the same thing with yes,

520
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:18,720
Speaker 2: like if they're done with you, you could tell that

521
00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:20,960
Speaker 2: they're down, if they're shady, you can tell that they're shady.

522
00:30:21,400 --> 00:30:23,600
Speaker 1: That is super valuable, super valuable.

523
00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, yes, I all of that. All of that, So.

524
00:30:32,160 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 4: That's the good stuff, right now, What about when there's conflict,

525
00:30:40,240 --> 00:30:47,080
Speaker 4: right or some type of issue, how do you kind

526
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:53,560
Speaker 4: of clear the air or approach a conversation when you're

527
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:58,080
Speaker 4: used to everything going well and then now there's a

528
00:30:58,120 --> 00:30:58,920
Speaker 4: bump in the road.

529
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 3: That's a great question.

530
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:07,160
Speaker 2: And I am a really active person instead of a

531
00:31:07,200 --> 00:31:11,760
Speaker 2: responsing person, which is one of not my very best

532
00:31:11,840 --> 00:31:18,719
Speaker 2: characteristic traits. And I'm working on that because I once again,

533
00:31:18,880 --> 00:31:23,200
Speaker 2: I know who I am, and there are times when

534
00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:29,800
Speaker 2: I definitely should have taken a step back instead of reacting.

535
00:31:30,800 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 2: So I'm just gonna speak for me. So when I

536
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 2: do that, because I have, I then have to stop

537
00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:43,000
Speaker 2: and process what the situation was Like was I.

538
00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:47,880
Speaker 3: Pouncing on something because I'm like overtired or overworked, overstressed,

539
00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:49,720
Speaker 3: or or was it.

540
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:58,280
Speaker 2: Something that legitimately I found problematic and both of those circumstances.

541
00:32:00,000 --> 00:32:04,560
Speaker 2: If I pop off, if it's legitimate, I do have

542
00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:07,200
Speaker 2: to say, you know what, I shouldn't. That was not

543
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:13,640
Speaker 2: a response. It's not how I should have acted. And also,

544
00:32:15,040 --> 00:32:19,800
Speaker 2: this is why it bothered me. And if you're close

545
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:24,840
Speaker 2: enough there should be able to have a dialogue, and

546
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:29,560
Speaker 2: that person very much may say you popped off on me.

547
00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:33,480
Speaker 2: You are completely disrespectful, like I can't talk to you

548
00:32:33,560 --> 00:32:36,000
Speaker 2: right now, and you have to respect that.

549
00:32:37,600 --> 00:32:38,440
Speaker 3: If there's.

550
00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:44,160
Speaker 2: A verbal disagreement, I don't think that that is so

551
00:32:44,280 --> 00:32:49,440
Speaker 2: egregious that there can't be a comeback from that. But

552
00:32:49,520 --> 00:32:54,560
Speaker 2: if you're like sleeping with your friends, man, like you

553
00:32:54,680 --> 00:32:57,080
Speaker 2: already decided that you didn't that you didn't value that.

554
00:32:57,080 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 3: Friendship for real.

555
00:33:01,760 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 2: So just being being willing to talk it out and

556
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:09,239
Speaker 2: own your faults and use eye statements and use and

557
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 2: also statements and don't.

558
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,480
Speaker 3: Say yeah, yeah, yeah.

559
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:18,360
Speaker 2: You without owning your tomfoolery and nonsense. I guess that's so.

560
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,160
Speaker 2: I guess that that's how I navigate through those waters.

561
00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:26,320
Speaker 3: I love that. I love.

562
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:32,680
Speaker 4: Owning, like I think the thing is owning your shit. Right. Like, So,

563
00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,800
Speaker 4: if you know that you like to react, then you're

564
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:40,480
Speaker 4: one who has a tendency to react, then recognizing that

565
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:45,920
Speaker 4: you're going to react, and then circling back around right,

566
00:33:47,280 --> 00:33:51,360
Speaker 4: and then somewhere down the line we work on how

567
00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 4: to slow down that immediate reaction, right, but then also

568
00:33:56,520 --> 00:34:03,280
Speaker 4: being clear about the boundaries and being clean that you

569
00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:06,960
Speaker 4: ain't with the shit and being willing to hear what

570
00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:10,280
Speaker 4: their boundaries are and what their needs are in the friendship.

571
00:34:11,120 --> 00:34:16,080
Speaker 6: And I think that sometimes it's worse than a relational

572
00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:21,720
Speaker 6: breakup if you have a friendship breakup, especially if there's

573
00:34:21,960 --> 00:34:26,160
Speaker 6: been a significant amount of time and you have gone

574
00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:32,880
Speaker 6: through many different iterations of your friendship, and that.

575
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:35,239
Speaker 2: Again, I'm going to bring it back to therapy. I

576
00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:38,400
Speaker 2: think that a lot of people don't own and respect

577
00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:43,839
Speaker 2: the importance of friendships, and when they do disintegrate in

578
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:46,799
Speaker 2: some way, they don't think that it is as impactful

579
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:54,480
Speaker 2: because it wasn't in sexually intimate relationship, not realizing that

580
00:34:54,960 --> 00:34:58,640
Speaker 2: there truly is a loss there and they may need

581
00:34:58,680 --> 00:35:06,239
Speaker 2: somebody to help them navigate through that experience because their

582
00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 2: lives were ultimately changed by this person some way, somehow,

583
00:35:09,320 --> 00:35:15,320
Speaker 2: and now that the losses occurred, you want to again,

584
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:16,279
Speaker 2: you want to own that.

585
00:35:17,400 --> 00:35:19,319
Speaker 5: I don't know, do you all feel like there's this

586
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:21,680
Speaker 5: culture now. I don't know if it's a generational thing,

587
00:35:21,719 --> 00:35:24,360
Speaker 5: but there's this culture. And there are these two perspectives

588
00:35:24,440 --> 00:35:28,879
Speaker 5: I hear oftentimes. One is there's this idea of no

589
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,319
Speaker 5: new friends. Right, people have no new friends, no new

590
00:35:31,360 --> 00:35:34,360
Speaker 5: friends no new friends, right, And then there's another idea

591
00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:36,799
Speaker 5: of around people saying, you know, I cut people off

592
00:35:36,840 --> 00:35:38,279
Speaker 5: with a quickness, like if you do this, like I

593
00:35:38,360 --> 00:35:40,400
Speaker 5: cut you off, And I feel like those can be

594
00:35:40,440 --> 00:35:42,359
Speaker 5: really problematic. But I'd love to know what you two

595
00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:45,480
Speaker 5: think about that. In the context of this conversation around

596
00:35:45,520 --> 00:35:47,839
Speaker 5: sisterhood and friendship.

597
00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:51,440
Speaker 2: I am team girlfriends all day every day, like I

598
00:35:51,480 --> 00:35:54,440
Speaker 2: don't like again, like I said, I collect people like

599
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:59,959
Speaker 2: if I find you inspirational and beautiful, and I would,

600
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:03,680
Speaker 2: I'll stalk you. I will make you feel uncomfortable. I

601
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:10,240
Speaker 2: will hump your leg like I speaking of boundaries.

602
00:36:14,120 --> 00:36:15,720
Speaker 1: Hilarity, She'll get up in your uterus.

603
00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, like like a whole way across the country away.

604
00:36:23,040 --> 00:36:27,759
Speaker 3: I will be in your uterus. Nothing is out of

605
00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:29,400
Speaker 3: limits in my world.

606
00:36:30,239 --> 00:36:33,680
Speaker 2: So these young whipper snappers that are like no new

607
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:36,400
Speaker 2: friends or I'll cut you off, I think that that

608
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:42,080
Speaker 2: is youth because I don't think that you have enough

609
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:49,600
Speaker 2: life experience to truly be like friendships aren't important. That

610
00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:53,120
Speaker 2: may be a youth thing. And in the belief that

611
00:36:53,200 --> 00:36:58,400
Speaker 2: like friendships are disposable disa pure speculation, because again, I

612
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:03,719
Speaker 2: have friends since kindergarten. I have friends for like twenty

613
00:37:03,719 --> 00:37:07,239
Speaker 2: plus years, so it's such a foreign concept to me.

614
00:37:07,880 --> 00:37:12,560
Speaker 2: And and those connections are so like my high school friends,

615
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:17,759
Speaker 2: my daughter hangs around with their daughters and that, so

616
00:37:17,840 --> 00:37:21,920
Speaker 2: it's like a whole nother generation of friendship because like

617
00:37:21,960 --> 00:37:25,360
Speaker 2: my friend Marisa, we've been friends since sophomore year in

618
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:28,600
Speaker 2: high school, and my daughter and her daughter play together

619
00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:30,880
Speaker 2: and like they go. She's the only house that my

620
00:37:30,960 --> 00:37:34,839
Speaker 2: daughter can sleep over because I'm that person because I've

621
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:40,560
Speaker 2: known her literally since puberty, so I trust her and

622
00:37:40,600 --> 00:37:44,120
Speaker 2: I trust her husband, and like anybody else, my daughter's like,

623
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:45,960
Speaker 2: can I sleep over the house? And I'm like, absolutely not,

624
00:37:46,239 --> 00:37:50,359
Speaker 2: you can't. You cannot. Sorry, they can sleep over here,

625
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:57,480
Speaker 2: but you know, so just that history is so important

626
00:37:57,640 --> 00:38:00,600
Speaker 2: to just look at somebody and they know what you're

627
00:38:00,640 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 2: feeling and what you're thinking, and you don't have.

628
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:07,080
Speaker 3: To iterate a word. That is so sad.

629
00:38:07,200 --> 00:38:11,960
Speaker 2: If people aren't connecting in that way anymore, do better,

630
00:38:12,040 --> 00:38:13,480
Speaker 2: young people do better?

631
00:38:13,640 --> 00:38:17,239
Speaker 3: Get a friend. I love that.

632
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:24,279
Speaker 4: I love that, and I agree that friendship's girlfriends are

633
00:38:24,719 --> 00:38:35,040
Speaker 4: so vital to your just existence that having a support system.

634
00:38:35,760 --> 00:38:38,200
Speaker 4: That's one thing that we talk about in therapy is

635
00:38:38,239 --> 00:38:41,200
Speaker 4: that like usually when I'm meeting a client for the

636
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:43,719
Speaker 4: first time, one of the questions that I'm probably asking is,

637
00:38:43,719 --> 00:38:45,960
Speaker 4: all right, so who are the people in your support system?

638
00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:51,359
Speaker 4: Because from a therapy perspective, therapy, we're going to get

639
00:38:51,360 --> 00:38:54,240
Speaker 4: into some deep stuff, We're going to open up some wounds.

640
00:38:54,719 --> 00:38:59,759
Speaker 4: And you're only with me for one hour, maybe once

641
00:38:59,800 --> 00:39:03,879
Speaker 4: a week, maybe twice a week. That's a whole lot

642
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:06,880
Speaker 4: of other hours that you need support.

643
00:39:07,120 --> 00:39:09,640
Speaker 3: So where's your tribe? Who's your people?

644
00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:16,200
Speaker 4: And I think this idea of no new friends, to me,

645
00:39:16,719 --> 00:39:22,839
Speaker 4: it feels middle school high school ish in terms of Oh,

646
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:27,120
Speaker 4: what it reminds me of is like movies like Mean Girls, right,

647
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:34,080
Speaker 4: where we've got our group and if you don't fit

648
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:41,080
Speaker 4: certain criteria, nope, you not with us, right. And to me,

649
00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:45,920
Speaker 4: what that does is that that's isolating. And what it

650
00:39:46,040 --> 00:39:51,440
Speaker 4: also does is that it's limiting because I know that

651
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:56,320
Speaker 4: I have friends in different stages in my life, right

652
00:39:57,800 --> 00:40:02,280
Speaker 4: that I have my best friend that I've been rocking

653
00:40:02,320 --> 00:40:07,560
Speaker 4: with since we were nine years old, right. And I

654
00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:11,600
Speaker 4: have friends that I've known since middle school, since high school,

655
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:15,279
Speaker 4: since college. I have friends that I have made in

656
00:40:15,400 --> 00:40:20,880
Speaker 4: adulthood in various cities that I've lived. So I have

657
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 4: friends from like all the various stages in my life,

658
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:29,360
Speaker 4: and some friends I talk to on a daily basis,

659
00:40:29,400 --> 00:40:33,799
Speaker 4: some friends less frequently, and the friends that I talk

660
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:38,560
Speaker 4: to less frequently. When the moment we connect, it's as

661
00:40:38,600 --> 00:40:42,200
Speaker 4: if we haven't missed a beat, like you know and

662
00:40:43,120 --> 00:40:46,800
Speaker 4: Bethan mee, like you said, like those little facial expressions

663
00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:50,319
Speaker 4: or a tone in your voice. Because they've known you

664
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:52,080
Speaker 4: for so long, they don't have to talk to you

665
00:40:52,160 --> 00:40:56,040
Speaker 4: every day to know what that means, to get it,

666
00:40:56,680 --> 00:40:59,000
Speaker 4: to show up for you in those moments when you

667
00:40:59,080 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 4: need them the most.

668
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:03,400
Speaker 2: And I think it also is so important in friendship

669
00:41:03,400 --> 00:41:08,520
Speaker 2: that people don't really recognize your friends are a mirror

670
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 2: of you, especially you're very good friends. So if you're

671
00:41:11,760 --> 00:41:15,399
Speaker 2: wiling out about something, your very good friends can say

672
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:20,680
Speaker 2: to you, what are you doing? They can check you,

673
00:41:22,120 --> 00:41:27,520
Speaker 2: and because you have so much respect for them, they

674
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:31,239
Speaker 2: may check you in a way that would be triggering

675
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:35,520
Speaker 2: if your spouse checked you, or if your significant others

676
00:41:35,560 --> 00:41:38,480
Speaker 2: said said something to you, or if your mother or

677
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:40,960
Speaker 2: your father or some sort of parental figure said something

678
00:41:41,000 --> 00:41:44,600
Speaker 2: to you. Because my friend Titia is forever checking me

679
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:48,120
Speaker 2: because she knows how I am. She knows and I'll

680
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,000
Speaker 2: call her or I'll send her a text message and

681
00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:53,920
Speaker 2: she'd be like and so she's like my barometer, Like

682
00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:55,120
Speaker 2: am I acting a fool?

683
00:41:56,080 --> 00:41:58,480
Speaker 3: Or like is it worth me? Worth me?

684
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:02,279
Speaker 2: You get riled out up about But like if my

685
00:42:02,360 --> 00:42:04,960
Speaker 2: husband had said the same thing with the same moderation,

686
00:42:05,239 --> 00:42:08,919
Speaker 2: and like I would have immediately like pounced on him,

687
00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:14,400
Speaker 2: like we were in the jungle. So good friends they

688
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 2: tell you about yourself because they want you to either

689
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:19,600
Speaker 2: do better.

690
00:42:20,880 --> 00:42:23,160
Speaker 3: Or see a different perspective.

691
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:28,000
Speaker 2: And if you have like fly by night friends or

692
00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:31,440
Speaker 2: like fair weather friends, or I don't even think that

693
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 2: there are fair weather friends, they're like rainy storm friends,

694
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 2: those friends that only want you to be around you

695
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:40,200
Speaker 2: when there's like a depressive moment, when there's gossip, when

696
00:42:40,239 --> 00:42:44,120
Speaker 2: there's drama, Like they don't want to champion you, they

697
00:42:44,239 --> 00:42:49,480
Speaker 2: just want to gossip with you, and you have to

698
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,480
Speaker 2: determine why they're in your life.

699
00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:56,239
Speaker 1: That's a beautiful point, and I agree with both of you.

700
00:42:56,280 --> 00:42:58,560
Speaker 5: We also have an episode about friends, so you got

701
00:42:58,560 --> 00:43:00,480
Speaker 5: to go through the archives that out.

702
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:02,240
Speaker 1: But I'm with y'all. I would agree.

703
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:03,879
Speaker 5: I think that people that I've met in the past

704
00:43:03,920 --> 00:43:08,080
Speaker 5: six years, including YouTube, are people that are like my family,

705
00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:09,759
Speaker 5: like my chosen family, now you know what I mean.

706
00:43:09,760 --> 00:43:11,759
Speaker 5: I think about the people in the past six years

707
00:43:11,760 --> 00:43:13,480
Speaker 5: and the people from different phases of life. So I

708
00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:16,440
Speaker 5: would definitely agree with that. I think it's about time

709
00:43:17,160 --> 00:43:18,240
Speaker 5: to shift up.

710
00:43:18,360 --> 00:43:21,000
Speaker 1: The na Go ahead, doctor dom, go ahead, go ahead.

711
00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:22,759
Speaker 1: I see that. Y'all. Got to go on Patreon to

712
00:43:22,760 --> 00:43:23,279
Speaker 1: watch the video.

713
00:43:23,360 --> 00:43:23,520
Speaker 5: Y'all.

714
00:43:23,520 --> 00:43:25,240
Speaker 1: You got to see all the all the visuals. Okay.

715
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:27,440
Speaker 5: So it's that time, y'all for us to shift up

716
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:31,200
Speaker 5: the conversation. And because we recognize, appreciate, and celebrate the

717
00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:34,120
Speaker 5: multifaceted woman, and we believe that it's okay to be

718
00:43:34,160 --> 00:43:37,560
Speaker 5: bougie and classy and ratchet and you can still be

719
00:43:37,680 --> 00:43:42,480
Speaker 5: elegant and dance the strip club music if you so choose, Bethany,

720
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:46,520
Speaker 5: we want to invite you to the oh you blatchet segments.

721
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:48,600
Speaker 1: So do you take on the challenge?

722
00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 3: I do. I'm so scared.

723
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 2: Red.

724
00:43:53,360 --> 00:43:56,120
Speaker 3: This was my scary part. I was like, I'm not ready.

725
00:43:56,239 --> 00:43:59,680
Speaker 1: That is so funny. Oh my goodness. Okay, we got you, girl,

726
00:43:59,680 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 1: We got you. Don't be scared. We got you, it

727
00:44:01,680 --> 00:44:02,759
Speaker 1: might get a little scary enough.

728
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,200
Speaker 5: Okay, So now that you've agreed, you said you'd take

729
00:44:05,200 --> 00:44:07,400
Speaker 5: on the challenge, we're going to tell you what to expect.

730
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:09,279
Speaker 5: So we're going to ask you three questions. We're going

731
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,800
Speaker 5: to share three sentence completions, and then we're going to

732
00:44:11,840 --> 00:44:14,520
Speaker 5: have you choose a number between one and three. And

733
00:44:14,560 --> 00:44:17,720
Speaker 5: we have some photos if you pulled up from your Instagram,

734
00:44:18,239 --> 00:44:19,920
Speaker 5: and we're going to pull that photo up and we

735
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:22,319
Speaker 5: want you to provide more context that we would not

736
00:44:22,440 --> 00:44:23,600
Speaker 5: know by looking at the photo.

737
00:44:24,040 --> 00:44:26,640
Speaker 3: Okay, girl, I better not be on a poll.

738
00:44:28,160 --> 00:44:35,319
Speaker 4: WHOA you know. That's why this is blatschet. This is

739
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:36,400
Speaker 4: is what that is.

740
00:44:39,880 --> 00:44:41,719
Speaker 3: I'm trying to say. I'm trying to quickly do a

741
00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,680
Speaker 3: rolodext on the phonot.

742
00:44:47,560 --> 00:44:51,400
Speaker 1: We shall see. So our first question.

743
00:44:52,040 --> 00:44:55,919
Speaker 4: What is the best piece of wisdom or advice you've

744
00:44:55,960 --> 00:44:56,960
Speaker 4: ever received.

745
00:44:58,239 --> 00:45:02,200
Speaker 2: I know that people have candled her, but Ellen DeGeneres,

746
00:45:02,840 --> 00:45:06,600
Speaker 2: my favorite quote of all time is be yourself unless

747
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 2: you're a serial killer.

748
00:45:08,960 --> 00:45:11,880
Speaker 5: Hey, I love it. Go ahead, Bethany, the you're so

749
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 5: and that's so fitting for you. I feel like the humor,

750
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:17,520
Speaker 5: but then also the criminal justice aspect as well, so

751
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:20,320
Speaker 5: fitting that should have been like your slogan on your own.

752
00:45:20,440 --> 00:45:22,879
Speaker 1: At your desk at your day job back in the day.

753
00:45:22,920 --> 00:45:23,359
Speaker 1: I love it.

754
00:45:23,719 --> 00:45:25,920
Speaker 5: Okay, Bethany, I have four words for you, lady, four

755
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:28,440
Speaker 5: wards and four words only, and those four words are

756
00:45:29,480 --> 00:45:30,440
Speaker 5: twerk or two step.

757
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:42,560
Speaker 2: What you're doing, Oh, I'll be fine, girl. So when

758
00:45:42,600 --> 00:45:44,920
Speaker 2: I think of two step, I think of like the

759
00:45:45,000 --> 00:45:49,960
Speaker 2: Chacha Slide, and I.

760
00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:53,160
Speaker 3: Love me at Chacha slide. But sometimes you just got

761
00:45:53,160 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 3: a twerk.

762
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:57,839
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna say both because you're never because I'm

763
00:45:57,840 --> 00:46:02,520
Speaker 2: a Gemini. Look, you never know what side you're gonna get.

764
00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,719
Speaker 1: We support, We're with it.

765
00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:09,000
Speaker 4: I mean, you know in the part of the song

766
00:46:09,080 --> 00:46:11,280
Speaker 4: of the Cha Cha Slide when they say get punky,

767
00:46:11,640 --> 00:46:14,160
Speaker 4: you get funk, you to work it out, you know.

768
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:16,319
Speaker 3: Week So we got you.

769
00:46:16,440 --> 00:46:18,960
Speaker 4: We see we see you, We see you.

770
00:46:20,080 --> 00:46:20,480
Speaker 3: All right.

771
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:27,040
Speaker 4: So next question, what is the sexiest item you own?

772
00:46:28,320 --> 00:46:29,000
Speaker 3: My smile?

773
00:46:30,560 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 5: Oh hey girl, go ahead girl with that sexy smile.

774
00:46:37,080 --> 00:46:39,680
Speaker 1: Go ahead. Well, Bethany.

775
00:46:39,719 --> 00:46:42,360
Speaker 5: Now we're gonna move on to our sentence completions, and

776
00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:46,640
Speaker 5: the first sentence completion is I cultivate sisterhood within my

777
00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:50,279
Speaker 5: company Crackers and soup bye.

778
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:55,800
Speaker 2: Being very cognizant of who I let enter my company's world.

779
00:46:57,560 --> 00:46:59,440
Speaker 1: Do you have a serious bedding process?

780
00:47:00,440 --> 00:47:00,839
Speaker 3: We do.

781
00:47:01,080 --> 00:47:03,439
Speaker 5: I love it very important.

782
00:47:03,719 --> 00:47:07,239
Speaker 2: And then if somebody gets past that wedding process and

783
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:15,480
Speaker 2: just respects my team members, they are immediately removed. Oh,

784
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:20,200
Speaker 2: money is not that important to me. Respect is more

785
00:47:20,239 --> 00:47:21,360
Speaker 2: important to me than money.

786
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:24,440
Speaker 3: Yep, I love that. I love that.

787
00:47:25,480 --> 00:47:30,360
Speaker 4: So the next sentence completion, one question or topic I

788
00:47:30,400 --> 00:47:33,200
Speaker 4: wish people asked me about more often.

789
00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 2: Is I guess my heritage because a lot of people

790
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:39,680
Speaker 2: think that I'm mixed, and I am one hundred percent black.

791
00:47:39,880 --> 00:47:44,000
Speaker 2: I'm cape Verdian, which is black Portuguese, and that's why

792
00:47:44,080 --> 00:47:46,359
Speaker 2: I light skinned, and a lot of people don't know that.

793
00:47:46,440 --> 00:47:48,000
Speaker 2: Like they either think that I'm mixed or they think

794
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:52,400
Speaker 2: I'm Hispanic, but no, I'm Katee Verdian, black portugi We like,

795
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:57,360
Speaker 2: thank you, Yes, yes.

796
00:47:57,400 --> 00:48:03,200
Speaker 5: Bow down for this can get all shades, okay on.

797
00:48:03,680 --> 00:48:09,120
Speaker 4: It will be one hundred yes. I love it all.

798
00:48:09,080 --> 00:48:09,640
Speaker 1: Right, Bethany.

799
00:48:09,640 --> 00:48:13,400
Speaker 5: Our last sentence completion is what I love most about

800
00:48:13,440 --> 00:48:14,560
Speaker 5: myself is.

801
00:48:15,760 --> 00:48:16,600
Speaker 3: My sense of humor.

802
00:48:17,480 --> 00:48:19,120
Speaker 1: I think we can all agree with that as well.

803
00:48:19,200 --> 00:48:23,799
Speaker 5: Yeah, did you have the same vibe when you were

804
00:48:23,840 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 5: in your like day job for those eighteen years or

805
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:27,279
Speaker 5: is this like a new.

806
00:48:27,360 --> 00:48:32,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh yeah, so and it was a whole problem

807
00:48:32,080 --> 00:48:35,920
Speaker 2: because people would just be constantly coming into my cubicle

808
00:48:35,960 --> 00:48:37,520
Speaker 2: like trying to talk to me, and I'd be like,

809
00:48:37,560 --> 00:48:40,040
Speaker 2: I need to get work done, like okay. So some

810
00:48:40,080 --> 00:48:42,880
Speaker 2: people don't believe in m past I do. I'm an

811
00:48:42,880 --> 00:48:45,839
Speaker 2: impast so they would like want to come and take

812
00:48:45,840 --> 00:48:47,600
Speaker 2: my energy because I made them feel.

813
00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:49,560
Speaker 3: Good while depleting me.

814
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:54,600
Speaker 2: And I think that that was a major problem when

815
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:56,759
Speaker 2: I was working there. I didn't know how to set

816
00:48:56,840 --> 00:49:01,320
Speaker 2: up boundaries so that like there wasn't in exchange of

817
00:49:01,520 --> 00:49:02,360
Speaker 2: energy all the time.

818
00:49:02,600 --> 00:49:03,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, so there, yes.

819
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:06,240
Speaker 2: And then I was talking to one of my friends

820
00:49:06,280 --> 00:49:09,160
Speaker 2: who still works in the office, and he was like,

821
00:49:09,560 --> 00:49:11,719
Speaker 2: it's never been the same since you left. He's like

822
00:49:11,800 --> 00:49:14,160
Speaker 2: all of the joy and the happiness just laughed and

823
00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:16,920
Speaker 2: I'm like, well, you know, you have the ability to

824
00:49:16,960 --> 00:49:20,719
Speaker 2: create joy, Like, don't put that on me. There you go,

825
00:49:20,800 --> 00:49:24,240
Speaker 2: you a hold grown adult, make yourself happy.

826
00:49:24,880 --> 00:49:29,600
Speaker 1: You gotta go ahead. That's a word right there, that's true. Rue.

827
00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:36,879
Speaker 5: So Bethany, we have some photos pulled up from your

828
00:49:36,920 --> 00:49:39,520
Speaker 5: Instagram and we're only gonna look at one, but we

829
00:49:39,560 --> 00:49:41,640
Speaker 5: need you to choose a number between one and three,

830
00:49:41,719 --> 00:49:43,960
Speaker 5: and then we'd love for you to provide more context

831
00:49:43,960 --> 00:49:45,160
Speaker 5: for us about this photo.

832
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:47,520
Speaker 3: Doesn't have to be true context or can I like

833
00:49:47,600 --> 00:49:48,320
Speaker 3: make up a story.

834
00:49:48,560 --> 00:49:50,200
Speaker 1: No, that's true context.

835
00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:51,120
Speaker 3: Damn it.

836
00:49:53,680 --> 00:49:58,200
Speaker 5: You know, I'll be trying to follow the rules.

837
00:49:58,480 --> 00:49:59,840
Speaker 3: I choose three.

838
00:50:00,600 --> 00:50:02,040
Speaker 1: Oh, I'm so happy you choose three.

839
00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:04,120
Speaker 5: Okay, So some people are not gonna be on Patreon,

840
00:50:04,239 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 5: so tell them what this photo is and then give

841
00:50:06,600 --> 00:50:07,320
Speaker 5: us the context.

842
00:50:07,680 --> 00:50:08,080
Speaker 1: Boom.

843
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 3: Oh my god.

844
00:50:12,160 --> 00:50:16,600
Speaker 2: So this is a picture of me when I was sixteen,

845
00:50:17,680 --> 00:50:21,840
Speaker 2: and it is a pink.

846
00:50:21,800 --> 00:50:24,920
Speaker 3: Like I don't even know what that material is. What

847
00:50:25,080 --> 00:50:28,480
Speaker 3: is that teta? I was gonna say, like, is that

848
00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:30,480
Speaker 3: what it is? That's what it looks like.

849
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:33,000
Speaker 4: That's taffaa that was hot in the nineties.

850
00:50:33,400 --> 00:50:36,600
Speaker 2: Oh, and it is such like a nineties hot pink

851
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:43,560
Speaker 2: and it has fluffy, billowy shoulders and my waist was

852
00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:50,720
Speaker 2: snatched though and period, I'm period and I'm still rocking

853
00:50:50,719 --> 00:50:56,399
Speaker 2: those big hoop ear rings. And I, like I said,

854
00:50:56,400 --> 00:51:00,160
Speaker 2: I was like sixteen and this was actually a make

855
00:51:00,200 --> 00:51:05,640
Speaker 2: sure of me and my bridesmaid's dress for my sister's wedding,

856
00:51:06,760 --> 00:51:10,400
Speaker 2: and the wedding day lasted longer than the marriage.

857
00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:12,520
Speaker 3: But that's okay because I looked fly as hell.

858
00:51:15,960 --> 00:51:18,920
Speaker 5: Okay, I'm just so when you said sister's wedding.

859
00:51:19,320 --> 00:51:21,400
Speaker 1: When you said sister's wedding, I was like, how timely

860
00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:22,080
Speaker 1: because of this.

861
00:51:22,040 --> 00:51:24,880
Speaker 5: Conversation and then the whole that's a whole another episode

862
00:51:24,880 --> 00:51:27,160
Speaker 5: that you said the wedding day lasted long.

863
00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 1: Oh lord, Okay, okay, we're gonna move past that.

864
00:51:30,200 --> 00:51:32,160
Speaker 2: But I think we did the chatchaw slide at the wedding,

865
00:51:32,239 --> 00:51:34,520
Speaker 2: so you know, full circle.

866
00:51:33,719 --> 00:51:36,000
Speaker 1: Circle moment, full circle mark.

867
00:51:36,160 --> 00:51:36,879
Speaker 3: Thank you for that.

868
00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:37,439
Speaker 1: That was fun.

869
00:51:37,440 --> 00:51:39,200
Speaker 5: I'm so happy you chose that pitch. I was secretly

870
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:41,920
Speaker 5: hoping you would choose number three. But Bethany, we just

871
00:51:41,960 --> 00:51:43,680
Speaker 5: want to thank you for your energy. I'm sure the

872
00:51:43,719 --> 00:51:45,520
Speaker 5: ladies listening they're like, I'm gonna go look her up.

873
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:48,680
Speaker 5: Oh my gosh, her energy, she's amazing. I'm so proud

874
00:51:48,719 --> 00:51:50,600
Speaker 5: of you. I know, Domina, I was proud of you

875
00:51:50,640 --> 00:51:52,920
Speaker 5: and all that you're doing with your business and just

876
00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:55,040
Speaker 5: how you're showing up in the world. And I'm happy

877
00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:57,360
Speaker 5: that you took the leap because we need people like

878
00:51:57,440 --> 00:52:00,279
Speaker 5: you in this in this space, and so kudos to you, lady,

879
00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:02,399
Speaker 5: for all that you're doing, and thank you.

880
00:52:03,480 --> 00:52:04,279
Speaker 3: Thank you.

881
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 2: Like we said, months and years can pass, and as

882
00:52:08,920 --> 00:52:10,759
Speaker 2: soon as you get up together, you're just like, oh,

883
00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:13,160
Speaker 2: it feels like I just spoke with you yesterday, and

884
00:52:13,239 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 2: both of you, it always feels like that for me.

885
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:19,800
Speaker 2: Like but and of course I chose three because Terry

886
00:52:19,920 --> 00:52:22,160
Speaker 2: was like, choose three, choose three, Choose three, and I'm

887
00:52:22,200 --> 00:52:24,279
Speaker 2: like in Terry's head, so I was like, Okay, I'm

888
00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:27,200
Speaker 2: going to choose three because that's just the connection that

889
00:52:27,239 --> 00:52:29,200
Speaker 2: we have at all times.

890
00:52:29,280 --> 00:52:30,520
Speaker 3: It's so hella creepy.

891
00:52:34,000 --> 00:52:37,719
Speaker 2: But like I said, I truly like honor all that

892
00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 2: you helped me with when I when I was coming

893
00:52:39,719 --> 00:52:43,400
Speaker 2: up and just learning from you and just being in

894
00:52:43,440 --> 00:52:46,760
Speaker 2: your light and walking hand with hand with you for

895
00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:50,480
Speaker 2: so long. It was just an honor and a privilege

896
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:53,160
Speaker 2: to know both of you. And I am so elated

897
00:52:53,200 --> 00:52:55,400
Speaker 2: that I got to work on a small piece of

898
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:59,480
Speaker 2: your podcast and that I get to just truly call

899
00:52:59,560 --> 00:53:00,680
Speaker 2: you sistem and friends.

900
00:53:01,480 --> 00:53:06,000
Speaker 3: It's the pleasure is honestly online. Oh and I hand

901
00:53:06,040 --> 00:53:07,120
Speaker 3: you all up to be on here.

902
00:53:07,200 --> 00:53:09,120
Speaker 2: I was like, what does a bitch have to do

903
00:53:09,280 --> 00:53:15,880
Speaker 2: to be on Cultivating her Space? I appreciate that, Rudinus. Okay,

904
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:19,080
Speaker 2: there's fresh when you when you go up to when

905
00:53:19,120 --> 00:53:20,960
Speaker 2: you go up to your crew and you're like bitches

906
00:53:21,560 --> 00:53:23,560
Speaker 2: for really it's taking this.

907
00:53:23,680 --> 00:53:35,040
Speaker 4: Long wait hold on, like can we talk on a mic? Well, Bethany,

908
00:53:35,120 --> 00:53:41,080
Speaker 4: we are just so so grateful that you joined us today,

909
00:53:42,040 --> 00:53:47,520
Speaker 4: and so for our listeners who want to follow you,

910
00:53:47,760 --> 00:53:52,760
Speaker 4: support you, and maybe even join your team, where can

911
00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:53,560
Speaker 4: they find you?

912
00:53:54,280 --> 00:53:56,320
Speaker 2: I would love that because if you are a listener

913
00:53:56,360 --> 00:53:59,840
Speaker 2: of Cultivating her Space, then you are absolutely fundamentally might

914
00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:04,040
Speaker 2: be people I read you guys' reviews like, uh, your

915
00:54:04,080 --> 00:54:07,080
Speaker 2: audience loves you because you're lovable. But I can be

916
00:54:07,160 --> 00:54:12,080
Speaker 2: found at www dot crackers in I N not d

917
00:54:12,200 --> 00:54:15,040
Speaker 2: I N soup dot com, c r A c K

918
00:54:15,280 --> 00:54:17,359
Speaker 2: E R s I N s o u p dot

919
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:19,439
Speaker 2: com and I'm sure they'll be in the show notes.

920
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,160
Speaker 3: Somebody does your show notes now, like, I'm sure it'll

921
00:54:22,160 --> 00:54:22,440
Speaker 3: be there.

922
00:54:22,640 --> 00:54:25,200
Speaker 2: I can also be found on Instagram at b crackers

923
00:54:25,200 --> 00:54:29,280
Speaker 2: and soup, where you can see the pink taffata sixteen

924
00:54:29,360 --> 00:54:31,560
Speaker 2: year old Bethany with the snatched ass waste.

925
00:54:31,600 --> 00:54:33,440
Speaker 3: My race is still snatched though, so no.

926
00:54:35,880 --> 00:54:43,400
Speaker 2: Now and then I'm on Twitter at like Crackers Underscore,

927
00:54:43,840 --> 00:54:47,000
Speaker 2: and my podcast is called Chatting over Chowder.

928
00:54:47,480 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 3: Terry was actually in season one, she was a guest.

929
00:54:51,480 --> 00:54:54,840
Speaker 2: So Terry's actually the reason why we use this company

930
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:58,680
Speaker 2: in sending our guest chowder because when Terry was pregnant,

931
00:54:58,680 --> 00:55:01,799
Speaker 2: she couldn't keep anything down and we were like, oh

932
00:55:01,840 --> 00:55:04,480
Speaker 2: my god, we have to send her something. And I

933
00:55:04,560 --> 00:55:06,680
Speaker 2: vetted this company and it's a woman don't company, and

934
00:55:06,719 --> 00:55:08,040
Speaker 2: I sent her soup, but she was like, it's the

935
00:55:08,080 --> 00:55:09,360
Speaker 2: only thing I could eat for a week.

936
00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:17,120
Speaker 7: So again full circle goes back to Terry, so I

937
00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:19,360
Speaker 7: get yeah, so if you can do crackers and soup,

938
00:55:19,640 --> 00:55:21,360
Speaker 7: I am the first thing that comes up that doesn't

939
00:55:21,400 --> 00:55:22,120
Speaker 7: have to do with food.

940
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:25,080
Speaker 3: So that's that's where you can find us.

941
00:55:25,760 --> 00:55:28,480
Speaker 1: Yay, thank you so much, Bethany. We appreciate you, lady.

942
00:55:29,280 --> 00:55:31,719
Speaker 3: I appreciate you both. Thank you so much for having me.

943
00:55:33,440 --> 00:55:36,279
Speaker 4: Hey lady, it's doctor Dom here from the Cultivating her

944
00:55:36,320 --> 00:55:40,319
Speaker 4: Space podcast. Are you currently a resident of the state

945
00:55:40,360 --> 00:55:45,799
Speaker 4: of California in contemplating starting your therapy journey? Well, if so,

946
00:55:46,560 --> 00:55:50,800
Speaker 4: please reach out to me at doctor Dominique Brusard dot com.

947
00:55:51,280 --> 00:55:56,160
Speaker 4: That's d R D O M I n I q

948
00:55:56,440 --> 00:56:02,680
Speaker 4: U E b r o U s Ard dot com

949
00:56:02,719 --> 00:56:07,120
Speaker 4: to schedule a free fifteen minute consultation. I look forward

950
00:56:07,160 --> 00:56:12,800
Speaker 4: to hearing from you. Thanks for joining us today. Please

951
00:56:12,880 --> 00:56:17,920
Speaker 4: note that our show may contain conversations about self help, advice,

952
00:56:18,560 --> 00:56:22,760
Speaker 4: self empowerment, and mental health, but is by no means

953
00:56:23,000 --> 00:56:26,680
Speaker 4: meant to be a substitute for an ongoing formal relationship

954
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:30,720
Speaker 4: with a trained mental health provider. If you are someone

955
00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:34,160
Speaker 4: you know is in need of mental health care, please

956
00:56:34,239 --> 00:56:39,399
Speaker 4: visit a Therapy for Black Girls directory Psychology today or

957
00:56:39,440 --> 00:56:41,120
Speaker 4: contact your insurance provider.

958
00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:43,520
Speaker 1: If you liked what you heard and want to keep

959
00:56:43,520 --> 00:56:48,560
Speaker 1: the conversation going, visit our website at cultivatinghirspace dot com

960
00:56:48,920 --> 00:56:51,400
Speaker 1: and be sure to click the Patreon tab to get.

961
00:56:51,239 --> 00:56:56,280
Speaker 5: Access to video content, bonuses, and our weekly after show

962
00:56:57,200 --> 00:57:01,759
Speaker 5: and before we meet again, repeat after me, what's meant

963
00:57:01,800 --> 00:57:02,040
Speaker 5: for me?

964
00:57:02,640 --> 00:57:03,759
Speaker 1: Will never miss me?

965
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:05,680
Speaker 3: I don't have to chase