Speaker 1: So I watch a lot of stand up I have
Speaker 1: my whole entire life as a kid, I watched all
Speaker 1: Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor. I do. When I watch a
Speaker 1: full hour of someone or an hour and a half,
Speaker 1: it's someone doing comedy, I do have such respect and
Speaker 1: think about how you could get You know, you're out
Speaker 1: there already, and I think about reality TV and how
Speaker 1: you know once the cameras are rolling, not just like
Speaker 1: every day when you're eating lunch, but yes, every day
Speaker 1: when you're eating lunch, but like in a big scene,
Speaker 1: like you're at a big dinner and there are four
Speaker 1: cameras instead of too, and like you've had a drink
Speaker 1: and you've said something and it may have gone wrong,
Speaker 1: and you're in your head about like you can't you
Speaker 1: could at least go to the bathroom and take a
Speaker 1: deep breath, even though they'll like have a mic on you.
Speaker 1: You're not like still in it the stand up comedy.
Speaker 1: Once you've fucking left, you've left, like you're on the
Speaker 1: road alone out there, like you can't be like hey
Speaker 1: stop pee, like you're out there and if you fuck
Speaker 1: something up you have to think about it the next minute.
Speaker 1: But you got to draw rop it. So it's just
Speaker 1: such an respect for that craft. And I would love
Speaker 1: to do a long set of stand up I have
Speaker 1: so many, it's like kind of like my rants in
Speaker 1: a row and in a story. But and I love
Speaker 1: that when I talk to people like Nikki Glazer, they
Speaker 1: say to me, you're a stand up comedian, and it
Speaker 1: makes me happy because I just that's like the one
Speaker 1: area of respect I want to have. And the one
Speaker 1: regret of my life was not pushing harder to be
Speaker 1: able to do the internship at SNL that I was granted,
Speaker 1: because my dream in life is to be on SNL. Okay,
Speaker 1: I want to talk about Chris rock Special and how
Speaker 1: I'm reading the book at the end first for you,
Speaker 1: because he almost came to tears at the end, and
Speaker 1: I don't know that I've ever seen that in him
Speaker 1: or another comedian really in that way, and it looked
Speaker 1: like a release. He's been silent for a year on
Speaker 1: something that was so degrading, so gargantuan, so polarizing, so
Speaker 1: significant for the entertainment industry, just such a major major
Speaker 1: move that went on, I mean a year ago, and
Speaker 1: now he comes out and he doesn't say a fucking word.
Speaker 1: Because everyone's telling him me as to say a word
Speaker 1: or wants a response. You can hold you don't have
Speaker 1: to say something because everyone else wants you to say
Speaker 1: something about something. It's very tempting to take the bait,
Speaker 1: you know, to take the way. He did not take
Speaker 1: the bath, and he took the cash. And he would
Speaker 1: have gotten the cash anyway because he's so talented. But
Speaker 1: he definitely worked it spunted into gold, and good for
Speaker 1: fucking him. It's a very expensive slap. And like he said,
Speaker 1: anyone who says words hurt hasn't been slapped in the face.
Speaker 1: He was expressing himself in a stand up comedy act,
Speaker 1: and I don't think that people are allowed to say
Speaker 1: anything anymore. And everyone's dissecting every single joke and saying
Speaker 1: what's appropriate and what's not appropriate, And so where is
Speaker 1: that line in comedy for him? For everybody does that
Speaker 1: is stand up comedy the one space. But then I
Speaker 1: think a stand up comedian not in their act wouldn't
Speaker 1: be able to say it on TikTok or Instagram. So
Speaker 1: are the finds the act? Like, so what are the
Speaker 1: rules of that? Because someone else might think, oh, they
Speaker 1: were just being funny on the Real Housewives and say
Speaker 1: something and they can't say it. But wait a minute,
Speaker 1: Chris Rock said it. I know that I can say
Speaker 1: things on this podcast that I wouldn't be able to
Speaker 1: say on social media. I'm not sure if it's even
Speaker 1: context or if it's that you're here signing up for
Speaker 1: this discussion and you know me, I don't actually know
Speaker 1: the reason. I just know that it's a fact. So
Speaker 1: where are where's the line and what are the rules?
Speaker 1: So anyway, I thought Chris Rock did really released what
Speaker 1: he needed to release. He looked emotional and it was
Speaker 1: risky and he didn't have to. He went there on
Speaker 1: racism with Megan Markle risky. He went there on Will
Speaker 1: Smith and calling him a bitch, went there, he went
Speaker 1: there on his wife and talking about putting the affair out,
Speaker 1: and he also fucking as Paul said, he put him
Speaker 1: in the ground. Will Smith slapped Chris Rock. Chris Rock
Speaker 1: put Will Smith in the ground. You could take a
Speaker 1: shot at this bee. You better not miss. It's like,
Speaker 1: go fucking slap Chris Rock. But that that that that
Speaker 1: motherfucker will wait for a year dormant and you got
Speaker 1: nothing to fucking say about it. Nobody gives a good
Speaker 1: fuck what Will Smith thinks about what Chris Rock did?
Speaker 1: And maybe maybe two wrongs don't make a right. Maybe
Speaker 1: maybe you know, in school, somebody slaps Brynt. I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna condone her biting them. I might understand, as Chris
Speaker 1: Rock said in one of his acts, So I would understand,
Speaker 1: but I would teach her two wrongs don't make a right.
Speaker 1: But someone fucking punches Bryn on national television at the Oscars,
Speaker 1: and a year later she finds a way to fucking
Speaker 1: bite back. I think it might be fair. I think
Speaker 1: it might be fair game. I mean it is. You know,
Speaker 1: this is why you don't go fuck with people if
Speaker 1: you don't want to get fucked with. I did a
Speaker 1: rant them. For some reason, people think it's fucking hilarious
Speaker 1: about like all your ship being stuck in the cart
Speaker 1: and then the brand reminding you that your ship is
Speaker 1: still in the car, Like you're not like you're like
Speaker 1: you're stupid, Like someone like you walked over to the
Speaker 1: you know, check out a Whole Foods and put your
Speaker 1: stuff out and didn't leave a couple items on the side,
Speaker 1: and so I was like, hey, tapping on the shoulder.
Speaker 1: You left these things over here, like I fucking no,
Speaker 1: I was too wasy to go put them away, and
Speaker 1: I left them in this basket here because I don't
Speaker 1: want them, because I'm editing my cart as I check out,
Speaker 1: so leave me the like, stop you're stalking me. But
Speaker 1: I then realized, and I was talking about Apple pay
Speaker 1: and how god's amn easy apple pey is, and it's
Speaker 1: actually frightening. Apple pays like fake money you found in
Speaker 1: a monopoly box. It's not okay, it's scary. We're all
Speaker 1: gonna go broke because of Apple Pay. Okay, broke. And
Speaker 1: then shop pay. I don't even know where that money
Speaker 1: is coming from. I literally don't know. I know I
Speaker 1: pay for some things and it says shop pay. I
Speaker 1: don't know what that is. I don't know what that
Speaker 1: is because I know what PayPal is, paypals and multiple
Speaker 1: step verification process. You gotta go like review your order
Speaker 1: and whatever, and is this your address? Whatever? Apple pay
Speaker 1: is literally like sneezing and it's over. It's crazy. But
Speaker 1: how annoyed do you get now? And you have to
Speaker 1: enter your goddamn information and it already has like auto
Speaker 1: field has your phone number, your email. All you gotta
Speaker 1: do is like plug in your address, and you're so
Speaker 1: exhausted by that step, Like you gotta put your name
Speaker 1: first last an address, and usually if you put the
Speaker 1: zip code and it finds it for you, and it
Speaker 1: finds your own street for you right away. The number
Speaker 1: it finds it for you, it knows and you're exhausted
Speaker 1: to get take a nap and get a deep tissue
Speaker 1: massage you after entering your address for payment, God forbid,
Speaker 1: you have to manually enter a credit card. What the
Speaker 1: fuck kind of richety ratchety website is this shit? I
Speaker 1: have to go get my like reader readers on to
Speaker 1: go find the three number or the four number code.
Speaker 1: I never know the God's in difference. What is the
Speaker 1: fucking difference? There's four numbers on the front, three numbers
Speaker 1: on the back. I don't know the CV two code.
Speaker 1: I don't know what any of that means. CCV code,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Then you got to get your expiration date,
Speaker 1: and God forbid, everybody picks at the same or the month.
Speaker 1: This first in the day is the first. So that
Speaker 1: is just exhausting. Lose five pounds from entering your address
Speaker 1: to buy something. It's like cavemen are coming out with
Speaker 1: a club to bring you the merchandise. If you've bought
Speaker 1: in a place, you have to enter your own address.
Speaker 1: That's very twenty never social media. TikTok in particular, if
Speaker 1: you're on TikTok you should know, and Riel's and a
Speaker 1: little bit of Instagram. It's like performing in a variety show. Okay,
Speaker 1: it's like a tallenge. It's like a high school talent show.
Speaker 1: It's like someone comes out with like moroccas and they're
Speaker 1: shaking them and like no one likes it. Or the
Speaker 1: Gong show from years ago. Only people ninety two and
Speaker 1: over rember that but like and like it doesn't work,
Speaker 1: and it's just like, oh, that didn't work, all right,
Speaker 1: Let's try something else. Let me sing the national ampth
Speaker 1: anthem in a Donald Duck voice. That didn't work or
Speaker 1: something or something something really stupid works, Like let me,
Speaker 1: you know, put make a bomb while I have an
Speaker 1: orange rind inside my lips. Let me use this this
Speaker 1: TikTok famous sound or effect where I look like a
Speaker 1: giraffe while I'm speaking, like so stupid and loserish. I
Speaker 1: am right in the middle of it. I am. I
Speaker 1: was under the weather for a minute and wasn't really posting,
Speaker 1: and I posted myself talking about something I don't even
Speaker 1: care about, with like an I was an egg. My
Speaker 1: head was an egg with a mouth and lips. And
Speaker 1: I'm in a refrigerator of course, like an actual like
Speaker 1: not like an egg talking. So it's supposed to be
Speaker 1: funny because it's like you're using an egg, and it
Speaker 1: is funny. But it's just like I said to my
Speaker 1: I said to someone that works with me, and I
Speaker 1: sent her. I sent her and yes, it's from a
Speaker 1: long time ago. It's from thirteen years ago. I sent
Speaker 1: her picture of me on the cover of Forbes magazine.
Speaker 1: I'm like a fucking I'm I don't even know if
Speaker 1: I'm hard boiled. I'm a fucking hard boiled egg with
Speaker 1: lips and eyes talking to people about something I don't
Speaker 1: even care about, to like get views. It's like, so
Speaker 1: it's so crazy. We're always like I'm over here, da
Speaker 1: da da dada. Oh that doesn't work. Okay, Hey, hey,
Speaker 1: so two influencers walk into a bar, bartomp bump like dance. Oh,
Speaker 1: let me let me go do dance, Let me do
Speaker 1: a hip hop, let me like, let me oh, let
Speaker 1: me drag my daughter into this one, like it is
Speaker 1: a fucking talent variety show. It is such so desperate,
Speaker 1: so loserus, and you're just like, wait a minute, for views,
Speaker 1: what are we doing? And then you got people over
Speaker 1: on Instagram like, let me filter myself, let me thirt strap,
Speaker 1: let me put a bikini on, pretend this looks like me,
Speaker 1: and be so goddamn desperate, because when we were growing up,
Speaker 1: you wouldn't. I mean, it's crazy that we've gone to
Speaker 1: the point where it's not even okay, but like you're
Speaker 1: supposed to brag, you're supposed to be like, it's giving whatever,
Speaker 1: it's giving Merril Moreau, it's giving. Like you're saying that
Speaker 1: about yourself, Like it's giving sleigh Like it's so cringe
Speaker 1: And I'm right in the middle of it. Not not
Speaker 1: that stuff, not the like look at me and it's giving.
Speaker 1: I only would do that if it's self deprecating. It's
Speaker 1: just too you could. I couldn't keep a stray face,
Speaker 1: like look how fucking hot I am. And I've been
Speaker 1: tempted before to take one week and just filter myself
Speaker 1: and cinch myself and like do the bullshit, but I
Speaker 1: only can never get away with it for like two
Speaker 1: seconds I do it, and then I like on the
Speaker 1: next slider, it's like what I really look like? I
Speaker 1: just can't do it. It's like almost like when you
Speaker 1: can't do a practical joke on someone you say it
Speaker 1: and you tell them too quickly, like I can't. Why
Speaker 1: can't I do it? Like I have wanted for so
Speaker 1: long to just for one week to like fuck around.
Speaker 1: I should do that experiment for one week, just like
Speaker 1: fuck around and post pictures of me edited. But like
Speaker 1: so they don't know the way that housewives do it,
Speaker 1: and housewives that I know, housewives that have seen in person.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you don't look like that I do media
Speaker 1: at all. So I'll talk to my team about doing that.
Speaker 1: I just I don't know. It's just like so because
Speaker 1: then what would all my tags say and the captions say,
Speaker 1: and they'd be like lying for a week. But I
Speaker 1: really want to do it. I actually, Oh, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: do it. I'm gonna do it for a week, and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna accord the results and how they're different. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go back and look at the pictures that I've
Speaker 1: already posted and posts very similar pictures, all cinched and
Speaker 1: filtered and snatched, but not enough so someone would definitely know,
Speaker 1: or maybe they will know. And I'm gonna see if
Speaker 1: the likes are more in views. I'm doing that, so
Speaker 1: I'm doing it. I'm gonna cringe. I'm gonna first drop
Speaker 1: it up. Okay,