Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central.
Speaker 2: Y'all know who George Santos is, right with his creepy
Speaker 2: ash If y'all don't know who he is, He's the
Speaker 2: new Republican congressman who found who we found out lied
Speaker 2: about his entire life. He made up a whole career
Speaker 2: as a businessman. He made up that his family was
Speaker 2: Jewish and his mom was a victim of ninety eleven
Speaker 2: ill ill, do you know how much you have to
Speaker 2: lie to be known as the lying congressman? I mean,
Speaker 2: all these dude is lie all day, but when you
Speaker 2: ask them who is the liar, they're like, this guy,
Speaker 2: wait till you hear about this shit he did.
Speaker 3: Representative George Santos has allegedly sewing three thousand dollars in
Speaker 3: donations from a disabled, homeless veterans dying service dog. Santos
Speaker 3: allegedly used an alias to calm the veteran and set
Speaker 3: up a go fundme page that would be deleted as
Speaker 3: soon as it hit its goal, and then Santos disappeared altogether.
Speaker 2: Exactly So you telling me this man didn't steal three
Speaker 2: thousand dollars from a dog. He didn't just steal from
Speaker 2: a service doll. He didn't just steal from a dying
Speaker 2: service doll.
Speaker 1: He stole from.
Speaker 2: A disable homeless veterans dying service doll.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, you evil and stupid.
Speaker 2: You're gonna mess with somebody's dog. Have you not heard
Speaker 2: of John? Your ass is in trouble. Trouble that's with
Speaker 2: no veterans dogs.
Speaker 1: You know what's so crazy?
Speaker 2: This guy is so evil. I wonder if they put
Speaker 2: him in there on purpose so I can't pay attention
Speaker 2: to the other evil people. Anybody got me eyes on
Speaker 2: Marjorie Taylor Green?
Speaker 1: What's up with that bitch? What is that bitch up to?
Speaker 2: She probably got Garfield tied up in her office. I'm serious, Like,
Speaker 2: what does this man have to do to get thrown
Speaker 2: out of Congress?
Speaker 1: He's a liar.
Speaker 2: Black people don't get believed when they actually tell the truth.
Speaker 2: Barack Obama was like, hey, I was born in American
Speaker 2: People were like, bullshit, where's your birth certificate? And this
Speaker 2: guy was like, I was a millionaire Jewish volleyball star,
Speaker 2: and y'all like, hell yeah, put him in Congress.
Speaker 1: Sick of y'all shit.
Speaker 4: It's been a bad week for George Santos or yes,
Speaker 4: he calls it.
Speaker 1: A good week.
Speaker 4: He's already been caught like fifty lives. He lot about
Speaker 4: his career, he lot about his name, he lot about
Speaker 4: running a pet charity, and now he's getting caught in
Speaker 4: a new lie.
Speaker 5: According to an ex friend of George Santos is from Brazil,
Speaker 5: the openly gay New York congressman used to perform in
Speaker 5: drag back in the day and even had his own
Speaker 5: drag queen persona named Kitara.
Speaker 3: Photos and video reveal that Santo's performed in drag several
Speaker 3: times over at least three years, despite his claim that
Speaker 3: it was something he did just once for fun.
Speaker 1: In Brazil.
Speaker 6: It was not a drag queen in Brazil, guys.
Speaker 1: I was young and I had fun at a festival.
Speaker 6: Sue me for having a life.
Speaker 4: Sue me for having a life. No, man, we should
Speaker 4: sue you for lying. You know, but the drag queen
Speaker 4: part is pretty cool. I like Katara. Katara.
Speaker 1: You stay.
Speaker 4: George Santos sachet away. Now, with all these lives, it's
Speaker 4: no surprise that fifty nine percent of New Yorkers want
Speaker 4: him to resign. But that does raise the question, how
Speaker 4: could it only be fifty nine percent. Who are the
Speaker 4: people who don't want him to resign? Well, lucky for us,
Speaker 4: they just released a nad.
Speaker 7: You've probably been hearing a lot in the media about
Speaker 7: our new Congressman George Santos, but now it's time that
Speaker 7: you hear from us, the people who.
Speaker 1: Voted for him.
Speaker 8: We here in New Yorks third District voted for Congressman
Speaker 8: Santos because he's a fighter, and not.
Speaker 6: Just as a politician, but as a boxer who beat
Speaker 6: Muhammad Ali in nineteen seventy two.
Speaker 1: It's a great fight.
Speaker 9: Oh God time.
Speaker 10: I stand with George Santos because when my apartment building
Speaker 10: was collapsing, he held it up with one arm.
Speaker 11: I support George Santos because, simply put, he's a war hero.
Speaker 1: We'll also invented the window.
Speaker 12: I'm voting for Santos because he cares about seniors, and
Speaker 12: as an eighty seven year old woman, that's important to me.
Speaker 1: I stand with the brother George Santos because he invented
Speaker 1: the cure for COVID. Just wish he had done it
Speaker 1: before I died from it. I stand with Santos. Yep.
Speaker 1: Even me. Academy Award winner Morgan Freeman.
Speaker 13: As a Christian woman who's never had sex.
Speaker 1: Because I'm saving myself for marriage.
Speaker 7: I know George Santos shares my values.
Speaker 8: Why do I support George Santos Because we're both outly.
Speaker 1: And Jewish jew Ish. I stand with George Santos. Now
Speaker 1: watch me this meet Boss Sandwich. I stand with George
Speaker 1: sam Who's Anthony Devold? I stand with Anthony Santa Stevold?
Speaker 8: Did George Santos?
Speaker 1: I stand with George Santos. I stand with George Gristanto,
Speaker 1: Anthony DeVito, George Michael John Semos, whatever his name may be.
Speaker 1: I'm with him. I'm with her, I'm with him. Can
Speaker 1: I call him Rick? I want to say Rick. I
Speaker 1: stand with Rick. I'll know WHOI is. Pay four with
Speaker 1: the money who.
Speaker 13: Sent to a dying dog?
Speaker 6: Propably.
Speaker 7: Hey guys, it's Daisy back again with another breakdown of
Speaker 7: plastic surgery trends in Republican Congressman. Today, we're going to
Speaker 7: talk about Anthony de Volder, or, as he's more commonly
Speaker 7: known by his stage name, Congressman George Santos. I just
Speaker 7: want to remind you, guys that I'm speculating to the
Speaker 7: best of my ability. About plastic surgeries. I'm here to
Speaker 7: try and tell you the truth, unlike George Santos, who
Speaker 7: lied about his mother being a victim of nine to eleven.
Speaker 7: Let's get into it. So in this old photo of Santos,
Speaker 7: we see that he has an undefined jaw, thinner lips,
Speaker 7: and a haircut that says I light about starting an
Speaker 7: animal charity. But in this most recent photo we see
Speaker 7: that Santos has made some really nice changes. First off,
Speaker 7: he's definitely gotten filler for his nasolabial folds, and you
Speaker 7: can tell that because his cheeks appear much more full,
Speaker 7: unlike his political resume, which has consisted of lies about
Speaker 7: where he went to school. Next, I can see that
Speaker 7: he's got some lip filler, and I love the amount
Speaker 7: that he's gotten. It's subtle. I think it really adds
Speaker 7: to his whole drag queen who's pretending he was never
Speaker 7: a drag queen vibe just perfect. Lastly, Santos has a
Speaker 7: significant amount of botox done on his forehead. Now, botox
Speaker 7: prevents wrinkles by not letting your skin fold, kind of
Speaker 7: like how George Santos refuses to fold to the many
Speaker 7: requests he's gotten asking him to resign. Anyways, that's all
Speaker 7: I have for you guys today. I'm going to try
Speaker 7: to make some more videos for you next week, so
Speaker 7: definitely comment below and let me know who you'd like
Speaker 7: to see.
Speaker 8: Earlier this week, he was roasted at the State of
Speaker 8: the Union by Utah Senator and silver Fox Mitt Romney,
Speaker 8: and apparently Georgie didn't appreciate it.
Speaker 7: Meanwhile, Santos is firing back at Senator Romney after they
Speaker 7: clash at the State of the Union.
Speaker 8: Romney said Santos should be embarrassed and should have sat
Speaker 8: in the back and stayed quiet.
Speaker 6: It's not the first time in the history that I've
Speaker 6: been told to shut up and go to the back
Speaker 6: of the room, especially by people who come from a
Speaker 6: privileged background. And I think it's reprehensible that the Senator
Speaker 6: would say such a thing to me in the demeaning way.
Speaker 4: He said.
Speaker 6: It wasn't very Mormon of him. That's what I can
Speaker 6: tell you.
Speaker 8: First of all, you can't complain about people coming from
Speaker 8: a privileged background when you dress like young Sheldon. You're
Speaker 8: saying that was a very Mormon. Romney is so Mormon
Speaker 8: that whatever he does is the Mormon thing to do.
Speaker 8: He is the king of the Mormons. All Mormons are
Speaker 8: mad at you right now, and as a Jewish person,
Speaker 8: I'm going to take take a leap of faith and
Speaker 8: speak on behalf of all Jews and say we're mad
Speaker 8: at you two. Even the Dalai Lama is like, oh
Speaker 8: this mother for I like how he says it's not
Speaker 8: the first time he's been told to go to the
Speaker 8: back of the room.
Speaker 1: It sounded like he was.
Speaker 8: About to say African Americans like me were told to
Speaker 8: go to the bat for years, but we said no.
Speaker 8: At the same time, though, George Santos is an absolute bitch.
Speaker 1: And I love it.
Speaker 14: George Santos now, he just started his first term in
Speaker 14: Congress and absolutely no one wants him to run again.
Speaker 14: His constituents are embarrassed by him. Republicans want him to
Speaker 14: go away. Even the Dali Lama said he wouldn't suck
Speaker 14: his tongue with a ten football, which means there's only
Speaker 14: one thing real alpha male would do.
Speaker 13: A metled Republican and New York Congressman George Santos going
Speaker 13: back on his word that he wouldn't run for reelection. Instead,
Speaker 13: he launched his campaign for reelection on his one hundredth
Speaker 13: day in office.
Speaker 1: It's a beautiful day here in Washington. It's a great
Speaker 1: day to be an American.
Speaker 6: It's a great data to hear a Republican, and it's
Speaker 6: a great date to are.
Speaker 9: Now it's reelection.
Speaker 13: Santos is under local, state, federal, and international investigation.
Speaker 14: Say what you want about Santos, but it's uber alpha
Speaker 14: to run for reelection when you're as unpopular as he is.
Speaker 14: He's so unpopular his campaign had to refund more donation
Speaker 14: than it's taken in true, which means he's technically raised
Speaker 14: negative three thousand dollars. You gotta give it to George Santos.
Speaker 14: He's the only elected official who's effectively taken money out
Speaker 14: of politics.
Speaker 11: When I first started talking with people about guest hosting
Speaker 11: the Daily Show, I said, you know, what I really
Speaker 11: want to do is spot like some great Latinos in
Speaker 11: American society.
Speaker 1: And I think, yeah.
Speaker 11: Because I think it's so important to use my position
Speaker 11: to uplift Larrasa. You know, so let's spin the wheel
Speaker 11: and see who our first subject is going to be.
Speaker 1: Wow, yeah, no, no, it's well George Santos.
Speaker 11: God helped me well, well, you know what, to be fair,
Speaker 11: we can't really take blame for this guy because we
Speaker 11: don't even know if he's really Latino or not. Okay,
Speaker 11: all right, so what do.
Speaker 1: You do now?
Speaker 10: Congressman George Santos struck a deal with prosecutors in Brazil
Speaker 10: to settle a charge that he defrauded a shop clerk
Speaker 10: out of thirteen hundred dollars worth of clothing and shoes.
Speaker 10: Under the deal, Santos will formally confess to the two
Speaker 10: thousand and eight crime and pay damages to the victim.
Speaker 10: A lawyer for Santos requested the deal in lieu of
Speaker 10: a trial, arguing that Santos is now gainfully employed and resocialized.
Speaker 10: Those are his words. Ten. The congressman told police that
Speaker 10: he wrote bad checks from a check folk that he
Speaker 10: stole from an elderly man who his mother was caring
Speaker 10: for in order to purchase the items.
Speaker 1: Wow. Wow, what a gigantic ass.
Speaker 11: Which I know Brazilians are usually into, but not like this.
Speaker 1: Ohed that offends you.
Speaker 11: Come on in a way, you have to respect Santoso.
Speaker 11: A lot of Republicans just want to end social security,
Speaker 11: but Santos has the balls to take an old man's
Speaker 11: wallet directly from his pocket. He actually stole from an
Speaker 11: elderly man his mother was caring for. And that's on
Speaker 11: top of stealing from a homeless veteran's dying dog.
Speaker 1: Is there no bottom? Is there nothing too low for
Speaker 1: this guy?
Speaker 11: George Sunten sees a make a Wish kid and he says, Oh,
Speaker 11: that's a jackpot.
Speaker 8: I'm talking about the broke millionaire, half black, gay Jewish
Speaker 8: volleyball star trek George Santos.
Speaker 1: Believe it or not, his resume keeps growing.
Speaker 8: Just this week, he's been accused of groping an aid
Speaker 8: and I will say this is the first thing about
Speaker 8: him that makes him sound like he does belong in Congress.
Speaker 8: Things are really starting to click for him. But before
Speaker 8: we could even let that sink in, we got hit
Speaker 8: with this other crazy lie.
Speaker 9: Meanwhile, George Santos was also a Broadway producer. At least
Speaker 9: that's what the embatted lawmaker allegedly told potential donors when
Speaker 9: he was running for office in twenty twenty one. Bloomberg
Speaker 9: reports Santos told supporters that he was a producer on
Speaker 9: the short lived Broadway production Spider Man, Turn Off the Dark,
Speaker 9: The Office of the play's producer confirmed that Santos did
Speaker 9: not work on it. The playolt ran for a short
Speaker 9: time and was plagued with technical issues and actor injuries.
Speaker 9: It lost millions of dollars during its run, and frankly
Speaker 9: a choice for Santos to lie about.
Speaker 1: A spokesman for the show said.
Speaker 9: Quote, of all the tribulations the producers of.
Speaker 15: Spider Man turn off the dark Head to endure, we
Speaker 15: are very pleased, proud, and relieved to report that working
Speaker 15: with Tor Santos is not one of them.
Speaker 8: I do not get this dude. How could he lie
Speaker 8: so much and not get better at lying? Why would
Speaker 8: you pick the most embarrassing Broadway show to lie about?
Speaker 8: That's like saying you heard of the Titanic.
Speaker 1: I was the captain. But maybe this guy is.
Speaker 8: Smarter than he looks, because each new scandal makes you
Speaker 8: forget about the last one. I've already forgotten that he
Speaker 8: stole money from a dead dog.
Speaker 1: That's right, you heard me. He stole from.
Speaker 8: A dog and then ghosted that dog.
Speaker 1: Who ghosts a dog.
Speaker 8: We've only known this guy for like five weeks. How
Speaker 8: are we already on season nineteen of his scandals? I
Speaker 8: feel like I need to put his scandals to, like, oh,
Speaker 8: we didn't start the fire, so I can remember them.
Speaker 8: Nine to eleven Volleyball, Spider Man Dead Doug explore.
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