Speaker 1: Hey, thanks for finding the Second Date Update podcast. It's
Speaker 1: Brook and Jeffrey in the morning. Yes, and today we
Speaker 1: actually do every Thursday a little something different than we
Speaker 1: do on our show. We're going to give you a
Speaker 1: brand new textual healing in just a moment, but first
Speaker 1: we have to revisit yesterday's Second Date because apparently Horny
Speaker 1: Botanical Gardens.
Speaker 2: Really really struck a chord with a lot of our listeners.
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, I was reading the textboard and like
Speaker 3: I'm scrolling right now and there's at least like five.
Speaker 4: People asking for Vanessa's number.
Speaker 5: Oh my god.
Speaker 3: Okay, and then no, I love these one says I've
Speaker 3: never done that in a botanical garden, but I did
Speaker 3: get a chick in a park. Oh okay, a lovely
Speaker 3: park out here, and this one is a good one.
Speaker 4: Hey, Brook and Jeffrey.
Speaker 3: I had a very successful hookup in the men's bathroom
Speaker 3: at the Botanic Gardens. Unfortunately it was interrupted by another
Speaker 3: man and his kid coming into the bathroom, so my
Speaker 3: boyfriend and I had to run out while he was
Speaker 3: in the toilet.
Speaker 1: It was sexy, though none of that sounds sexy to me,
Speaker 1: but I'm just gonna have to take your word for it.
Speaker 1: Disturbing so much was going down at the Botanical Garden.
Speaker 4: TAA gardens parks.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I can never look at them the same anymore?
Speaker 4: Or kid?
Speaker 1: What?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 5: All right, Hey, we.
Speaker 2: Love your comments. Leave them off with this one too.
Speaker 1: It's your brand new textual healing starting right now.
Speaker 5: We've all seen the YouTube videos of city council meetings
Speaker 5: where a bunch of stuffy up type people are discussing
Speaker 5: things like traffic signs and size restrictions on your trash
Speaker 5: cand lids.
Speaker 2: Yea, I usually don't hit play on those, but okay, yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, fair. They do get pretty boring and sometimes one
Speaker 5: email can help spice things up a little bit. And
Speaker 5: oh boy, did that happen at an HOA meeting recently?
Speaker 5: One sassy email has sparked a very awkward situation between neighbors.
Speaker 5: And now we're getting roped into the drama. You're gonna
Speaker 5: hear the shady text that started it all in a
Speaker 5: brand new textual healing that's coming up next. Text you
Speaker 5: will heal then textual It's Brook and Jeffrey in the morning.
Speaker 5: And we are not doctors, no, at least not the
Speaker 5: licensed kind, but we do have the ability to heal
Speaker 5: people textually, Yes, we do, because this is textual healing
Speaker 5: where we help out our listeners who are stuck in
Speaker 5: an awkward or difficult situation where they have to text
Speaker 5: someone but don't know exactly what to say. We'll work
Speaker 5: with you to craft the perfect message.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're kind of like that back alley clinic that
Speaker 1: you get botox from.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 5: I don't know what clinics you like to visit, Brooke.
Speaker 2: But I'm just thinking of the doctor analogy.
Speaker 5: Sorry, you don't believe in doctors. Yeah, but perfect message
Speaker 5: is kind of the strong word for it. A workable
Speaker 5: one is what we're after here. Something that helps achieve
Speaker 5: what you want while hopefully preserving your dignity in the process.
Speaker 5: And writers block for text messaging.
Speaker 2: Yeah, good analogy.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I should have gone with that one instead of
Speaker 5: the doctors chat GPT when you have exactly We've got
Speaker 5: a woman on the phone looking for some tender textual
Speaker 5: healing today. Her name is Samantha. So, Samantha, welcome to
Speaker 5: the show.
Speaker 6: He there.
Speaker 5: Did you specifically ask for tender or is that a
Speaker 5: jeff thing?
Speaker 1: I mean, I think she appreciates it.
Speaker 5: I mean we like to start tender and gentle, and
Speaker 5: then we can get firmer and more aggressive as this
Speaker 5: goes on. But let's start by having you tell us
Speaker 5: what your situation is, Samantha, and how we can help
Speaker 5: heal you. Textually, I screwed.
Speaker 6: Up big time, totally, totally. I'm on an h A board,
Speaker 6: So you know what that's like.
Speaker 2: Okay, volunteered to be on the board.
Speaker 6: What was I thinking?
Speaker 5: You were chasing? The power that comes with it is
Speaker 5: a lot of power.
Speaker 2: You needed to have called us before you made that choice.
Speaker 5: Okay, so something involving your.
Speaker 6: Well, what happened was we have this one board member
Speaker 6: and he does these lengthy, long winded wordy emails that
Speaker 6: go on and on and on and on. You know,
Speaker 6: I get to the point, make it short and simple.
Speaker 6: I screamshotted one and I put a caption on it.
Speaker 6: It said, will someone please take his keyboard away? Exclamation point.
Speaker 6: I was going to send it to another board member
Speaker 6: that we both kind of had this like running joke there,
Speaker 6: but it went to the entire complex.
Speaker 1: No, there even people who were on the h A board.
Speaker 6: Yes, yes, including the person that I was referring to.
Speaker 2: My goodness, oh, and is it too late to say
Speaker 2: you got hacked? Okay, very specific joke.
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, I mean what were the emotions that you
Speaker 5: were feeling when you realized you had sent it out
Speaker 5: to the entire complex?
Speaker 6: It was like, oh, you said that, my heart sunk
Speaker 6: and tell.
Speaker 5: Us that story?
Speaker 2: What did I do?
Speaker 6: I mean, I feel really bad? And I mean it
Speaker 6: was like, I think I first noticed it when I
Speaker 6: started getting these emojiss Oh I got, I got the
Speaker 6: little popcorn and the big eye.
Speaker 1: I'm here for the showoji people.
Speaker 6: OHMG, type one? You know?
Speaker 1: No, wait, did he write back to the guy you
Speaker 1: were talking about right back?
Speaker 6: No? No, nothing from him, But I mean I'm sure
Speaker 6: he read it.
Speaker 5: Okay, So obviously that's a really awkward situation to find
Speaker 5: yourself in. And now you've emailed our show for help.
Speaker 5: What are you wanting to do with your text here?
Speaker 6: I mean, I want to apologize. I want to take
Speaker 6: accountability to what I did.
Speaker 1: So we're going to be texting him.
Speaker 6: Yes, I want to text him directly.
Speaker 5: Okay, yeah, Okay, we'll make sure. Don't you sure you
Speaker 5: don't want to double down on what you said in
Speaker 5: a joke?
Speaker 4: Breaking his house steels laptop if you prefer.
Speaker 1: Do you think we follow it up where you just
Speaker 1: text him a thing like it's the second part of
Speaker 1: your joke. It's like, would somebody take this keyboard away
Speaker 1: and give this guy a microphone?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Yeah, MVP with a little gold star more for.
Speaker 6: God?
Speaker 5: Has anyone in the room actually had a situation like
Speaker 5: this happened where you accidentally sent out a mass email
Speaker 5: with something incriminating in it.
Speaker 1: I accidentally was talking crap about my sister to my
Speaker 1: mom and I didn't know she was on the email thread.
Speaker 5: Okay, and what did you do in that situation?
Speaker 2: Bro? I immediately called and apologized.
Speaker 5: Okay, we're not calling it. Yeah, do a call.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean she was mad at me for a while.
Speaker 5: Can we take any lessons from what you said and
Speaker 5: apply it to this situation?
Speaker 1: I mean, I think the lesson is you just have
Speaker 1: to know that you're in the wrong, like that you messed.
Speaker 5: Up, So tell the guy he messed up wrong. No, okay,
Speaker 5: she needs to accept accountability. How does she say that? Though?
Speaker 2: What are you most worried about?
Speaker 1: You're worried about hurting his feelings or you're worried about
Speaker 1: it being awkward?
Speaker 2: With him later, like are you even sorry for what
Speaker 2: you said? Or you just sorry that you got caught?
Speaker 6: Well, you know, it's something I would have said to
Speaker 6: a friend, like oh here he goes again. Yeah, I
Speaker 6: mean I do want to apologize. I didn't mean to
Speaker 6: pray a joke at his expense.
Speaker 1: Right right, right, or embarrass him in front of other people,
Speaker 1: right and exactly?
Speaker 5: Okay, you give advice in her own words, But you're
Speaker 5: the age away. Aren't you supposed to sound boring? Like
Speaker 5: aren't you supposed to start with like you may have
Speaker 5: been at tentative to a text message yesterday. Yeah, I
Speaker 5: think in most situations that would apply. But for this,
Speaker 5: we're gonna have to be a little bit heartfelt, something sincere,
Speaker 5: and make it seem like she really means it. So
Speaker 5: what we have to start crafting?
Speaker 6: Now?
Speaker 5: What are we going to type to this guy?
Speaker 2: I think the first thing you need to do is
Speaker 2: figure out if he saw it.
Speaker 1: You need to say, oh my god, I accidentally send
Speaker 1: an email to everyone.
Speaker 2: Did you see it?
Speaker 5: Pretty interesting email thread we had yesterday? Huh? I like
Speaker 5: that that's just fishing around. You're not even pointed with it.
Speaker 5: I kind of like that, what do you think.
Speaker 6: Samantha, You know, I just know that if I call
Speaker 6: attention to it, even if he didn't see it, then
Speaker 6: he's gonna go love.
Speaker 5: Then he will go yeah, those.
Speaker 4: Have you had a chance to check your why?
Speaker 5: And then he goes to chat And honestly, maybe that's
Speaker 5: what he needs, and maybe you.
Speaker 1: Could play it off as a joke if he has
Speaker 1: seen it. It's like, oh, I was actually gonna send
Speaker 1: that just to you, like it was going to be
Speaker 1: an inside joke between you two, but I accidentally send
Speaker 1: it to everybody.
Speaker 5: I like that, Samantha. I think you gotta go with
Speaker 5: that one.
Speaker 6: Okay, let's see.
Speaker 1: So I mean, maybe start with, hey, did you see
Speaker 1: the email yesterday that everybody's don't say that.
Speaker 5: Everybody everybody's laughing at you. Honestly, I liked Jose's thing,
Speaker 5: be like, whoa pretty crazy text thread that the group
Speaker 5: had going yesterday.
Speaker 1: Maybe something to lighten it, like what about a yike's
Speaker 1: face that's actually not the big eyes.
Speaker 5: That's accepting some responsibility. Let's start writing that, Okay, Samantha.
Speaker 1: Okay, every time I hear about Hy's I'm so glad
Speaker 1: I've never lived with one.
Speaker 5: Samantha, did you send it?
Speaker 2: Okay, how are you feeling?
Speaker 6: I'm nervous about okah.
Speaker 5: Sometime we have to just react to whatever he says.
Speaker 6: Now I wanted to answer or not.
Speaker 5: He doesn't, but just double checking you did send it
Speaker 5: to him and not to the.
Speaker 2: Okay, learned.
Speaker 5: I think. So we've ripped the band aid off. We've
Speaker 5: started the initial stages of our apology. Will come back
Speaker 5: and continue it with more textual healing to the weird
Speaker 5: guy from HOA. Right after this hold on, we're in
Speaker 5: the middle of textual healing with our listener, Samantha, who's
Speaker 5: trying to fix a big whoopsie that she made because
Speaker 5: she's on an HOA board with one particularly passionate member
Speaker 5: who writes super long winded, detailed emails.
Speaker 7: It's just kind of a lot, yes, generally very on
Speaker 7: top of things, too much so, so she basically screenshoted
Speaker 7: one of his longer messages and put a caption on
Speaker 7: it saying, well, someone please take his keyboard away, and.
Speaker 5: Meant to send it to just one of her friends,
Speaker 5: didn't realize it went out to the whole group, including
Speaker 5: the guy that she was poking fun at. Pretty much accident.
Speaker 5: Now she feels terrible about it, wants to apologize to
Speaker 5: him and make it right, but have it come across
Speaker 5: soundings and see her and not just performative. So we suggested,
Speaker 5: why not gauge and just see if he even saw
Speaker 5: it first. So we put out a feeler text that said,
Speaker 5: Yike's pretty crazy. What was happening in the HOA textraad yesterday? Huh,
Speaker 5: just to see if he knew what we were talking about.
Speaker 2: I am like, actually nervous about what he's going to say.
Speaker 1: Mad.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Well, we don't even know if he did respond,
Speaker 5: so let's find out. Samantha, did you get a message
Speaker 5: back from the dude?
Speaker 6: Sure?
Speaker 4: Did like that?
Speaker 5: What did it say?
Speaker 6: It is? Yeah? I guess from now on I will
Speaker 6: keep my emails under twelve paragraphs for you. I'll then
Speaker 6: signed it with a middle finger emoji.
Speaker 5: Oh kidding at first?
Speaker 1: Oh, I thought he was taking constructive criticism.
Speaker 3: Well, okay, that was a sarcastic twelve paragraph dude.
Speaker 5: I'm sorry he's still kidding. But the middle fingers back
Speaker 5: out of.
Speaker 2: All the emojis, that is the most aggressive.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean, we've never suggested anyone to use it
Speaker 5: on here. Yeah, we suggest did a lot of emojis
Speaker 5: for people to.
Speaker 4: Type out, so we should suggest it more.
Speaker 2: Maybe he's saying you're number one, and he's.
Speaker 5: Okay, I mean, how are you taking his text Samantha?
Speaker 6: I mean I feel bad. It's like I really need
Speaker 6: to definitely go in with the full apologies. Okay, Okay,
Speaker 6: I got yeah, I gotta, I gotta do it.
Speaker 5: I mean, I think it's more important that you just
Speaker 5: come across with something pretty sincere about like I'm super sorry.
Speaker 5: And maybe you could even compliment him to try and backtrack.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean you can't.
Speaker 2: You can't do an honest compliment. You can say like.
Speaker 6: You take a lot of time to do the email.
Speaker 1: And we appreciate the passion that you have. You're one
Speaker 1: of the reasons this place is running so well.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I have a secret crush on you. Well, you know,
Speaker 5: let's find the line you keep me running to.
Speaker 1: Okay, start with your own apology. I think that has
Speaker 1: to be in your words.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, Well, I definitely like the thing about like
Speaker 6: you do a good job and you put a lot
Speaker 6: into it. Shows. It's just sometimes if they're long.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, and then you say it what a jerk.
Speaker 2: You are, and I am such a jerk. I didn't
Speaker 2: mean for everyone to see that.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 5: Okay, so why don't you let's send the apology text
Speaker 5: and hopefully that'll help soften him a little bit.
Speaker 1: Okay, dude, you're about to get so many A two
Speaker 1: A fines if this doesn't go.
Speaker 5: He's going to be all over your property with like
Speaker 5: measuring tape, taking photos and everything is there while we're
Speaker 5: waiting for him. Is there any other gesture you can do?
Speaker 5: Are you a good like baker or like you could
Speaker 5: you drop cookies off? Yeah, that's like kind of neighborly.
Speaker 6: That's a good idea.
Speaker 5: That's what you meant hand gestures that you could do back.
Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, wait wait wait it's popped.
Speaker 5: Okay, it popped bubbles? Oh okay, pop pop.
Speaker 6: Okay, Okay, here's what he says, wrote something, Go ahead.
Speaker 6: I showed your text to my therapist.
Speaker 5: Oh no, it.
Speaker 6: Says I have a tendency to trust loud women with
Speaker 6: wine breasts, So it makes sense.
Speaker 4: What what?
Speaker 1: Wait?
Speaker 2: I highly doubt a therapist said that.
Speaker 6: Yeah. He's trying to yeah, yeah, to make you feel
Speaker 6: It's like.
Speaker 1: A passive aggressive insult to her that she drinks too
Speaker 1: much wine and that.
Speaker 6: She's maybe I should get him a bottle of wine.
Speaker 5: That's funny, but clearly his feelings were hurt by it.
Speaker 5: So he's taking whatever chance that he can to get
Speaker 5: out his emotions and try.
Speaker 2: And get even jump out a wine bandwagon. And you're right,
Speaker 2: I was drunk.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's actually honestly, Yeah.
Speaker 6: I love it. I love it.
Speaker 5: That'd be a good way to disarm him, because he
Speaker 5: can't be mad at you if you're literally taking what
Speaker 5: he's giving you.
Speaker 6: So I admit it. I had to make.
Speaker 5: A ten am text and you can even do a
Speaker 5: little wine glass emoji. But I think afterwards, really double
Speaker 5: down on the apology, like seriously though, like I do
Speaker 5: sincerely apologize. I feel terrible.
Speaker 6: Threw it up and I feel really bad.
Speaker 5: I think a lot of people feel you. But so
Speaker 5: you sent the text, Yeah, I got it.
Speaker 6: Great, So okay, let's see how this one goes over.
Speaker 1: Is there anyone that everyone on the HA hates, you know,
Speaker 1: sometimes everybody needs a common enemy.
Speaker 4: Or is it him?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I mean, if if he.
Speaker 1: Doesn't like someone, you should say you wouldn't believe the
Speaker 1: meme I sent about Lois or you know, wants.
Speaker 5: To start like high school drama and keep the guy
Speaker 5: sip going. You want to talk to cry about somebody.
Speaker 6: There isn't enough drama on these boards anyhow.
Speaker 5: We're trying to put out the flames here. So are
Speaker 5: you seeing anything from him?
Speaker 6: It's mate here it is.
Speaker 5: We're getting pops.
Speaker 2: See what we got, she says, Okay.
Speaker 5: We love what a picture with the flip phone.
Speaker 6: For some reason, in all honesty, I showed my wife
Speaker 6: and she kind of agreed with you.
Speaker 2: That's a sweet response from him. He's actually coming to
Speaker 2: the middle.
Speaker 6: But I did not expect that, So don't feel bad.
Speaker 6: I'm sticking to bullet points from now on.
Speaker 2: That guy came from the middle finger back to this.
Speaker 6: Yeah. I think this is success, definite least success.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and he took your constructive criticism on his long
Speaker 5: winded email to his wife.
Speaker 4: He's probably so happy he's gonna stop emailing.
Speaker 5: Ye oh my okay, So I feel like at this
Speaker 5: point we're good.
Speaker 6: You shut up.
Speaker 2: Now you need to write her back one more time.
Speaker 1: I just say, yeah, I'll be dropping off a bottle
Speaker 1: of wine for you and your wife.
Speaker 2: You should still do you know what I mean.
Speaker 6: I definitely will do that, definitely.
Speaker 5: Just don't show up already drinking someone. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 5: I'm not drinking wine. I'm drinking vodka. Okay, So if
Speaker 5: you send that, then we're gonna call it good.
Speaker 6: Okay, Samantha, Okay, this is a win win, and I
Speaker 6: get shorter emails on top of it.
Speaker 5: Successful edition of textual Healing. Please nobody else from Hoa's
Speaker 5: text in.
Speaker 6: Jeffrey in the Morning, Freaking Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 5: Why do I feel like our listener Samantha and that
Speaker 5: dude's wife are gonna instantly hit it off, and they're
Speaker 5: gonna hang out and high five each other, and the
Speaker 5: wife's gonna start going in on the husband too.
Speaker 2: That's gonna be why yes one Wednesday's girl.
Speaker 5: Yeah, oh my god, you think his emails are bad,
Speaker 5: At least you don't have to sit through his dumb
Speaker 5: slideshow presentations after we get back from a vacation.
Speaker 6: God, well, you.
Speaker 1: Could tell by how quickly he shrank away from his
Speaker 1: middle finger text.
Speaker 2: Then he's been beaten down before.
Speaker 5: Yeah, guy, he's trying to clap back at the woman
Speaker 5: who's come after him, and he never comes out of
Speaker 5: yeah and no. But you know what, if you want to,
Speaker 5: I give you full permission to talk crap about all
Speaker 5: of us if you hit subscribe on the podcast right now.
Speaker 1: Send the link of this podcast to everybody you know
Speaker 1: and tell him how terrible it is.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so god. That guy Jeff too. His voice is
Speaker 5: so sultry and masculine.
Speaker 2: Ugh, that's not insulting, you thought, Well
Speaker 5: Whatever insult you want to come up with,