1 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:15,280 Speaker 1: It's interesting. I've been on Instagram for years and Twitter 2 00:00:15,880 --> 00:00:20,480 Speaker 1: and I've never had people talk about Jesus on Instagram 3 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 1: and Twitter, and I find it interesting. I find it 4 00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:29,400 Speaker 1: interesting that on TikTok in the comments there's almost always 5 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:33,880 Speaker 1: um like a sermon, like someone says like Jesus died 6 00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:36,800 Speaker 1: for our sins and you know, like preaching like evangel 7 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:40,640 Speaker 1: like evangelism advantage is that a word evangelism on TikTok. 8 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 1: And I find that to be such an interesting platform. 9 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,879 Speaker 1: I mean, you see on the highway, um, have you 10 00:00:46,960 --> 00:00:48,879 Speaker 1: seen you? Have you? Have you found Jesus? And then 11 00:00:48,880 --> 00:00:51,159 Speaker 1: they put a phone number up You're like, I have 12 00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:53,800 Speaker 1: you know. I wonder if people calling like I just 13 00:00:53,840 --> 00:00:56,000 Speaker 1: found Jesus, but it's because they want to help you 14 00:00:56,040 --> 00:00:58,440 Speaker 1: find Jesus. But it's interesting that it's coming through a 15 00:00:58,480 --> 00:01:02,480 Speaker 1: billboard and TikTok. I wouldn't think I would think that 16 00:01:02,520 --> 00:01:05,759 Speaker 1: maybe Facebook or Instagram because they're sort of not as 17 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:11,640 Speaker 1: superficial and like TJ Max Hall off Sex Fifth Avenue, 18 00:01:11,640 --> 00:01:14,920 Speaker 1: Hall air Mes Hall about a twenty million dollar handbag 19 00:01:15,000 --> 00:01:17,560 Speaker 1: even though there's a war going on, like TikTok can 20 00:01:17,640 --> 00:01:20,920 Speaker 1: be super official, really superficial like, let me talk about 21 00:01:20,959 --> 00:01:23,959 Speaker 1: bronzea for ten minutes. Like it's just really so, it's 22 00:01:23,959 --> 00:01:28,479 Speaker 1: just funny that on TikTok, on every post there's always 23 00:01:28,480 --> 00:01:30,600 Speaker 1: one person and I don't even think it's the same person, 24 00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:34,360 Speaker 1: just really preaching about Jesus and I'm like okay. And 25 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:36,880 Speaker 1: it just comes in the middle of like Brin and 26 00:01:36,920 --> 00:01:40,479 Speaker 1: I doing uh a TikTok, which is we're playing two 27 00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:43,920 Speaker 1: criminals who rob banks in town in the town, like 28 00:01:43,959 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 1: we're doing the voice like we're gonna go, we're gonna 29 00:01:46,319 --> 00:01:48,600 Speaker 1: ask you to do something. We're gonna go hurt some people, 30 00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:51,160 Speaker 1: but you can never ask me again. And she's like, 31 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:53,440 Speaker 1: who's cad a We're gonna take like and then someone's like, 32 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:55,800 Speaker 1: you know, Jesus has been found and he's and I'm 33 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:59,480 Speaker 1: like okay. It just feels like an unusual place for 34 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:04,520 Speaker 1: me to be um finding religion within the parameters of TikTok. 35 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:06,560 Speaker 1: So I won't know if any of you have had 36 00:02:06,720 --> 00:02:11,200 Speaker 1: people talk about different religions. It could be Kabbalah or 37 00:02:11,360 --> 00:02:15,440 Speaker 1: born again Christians or Jews for Jesus or harm Har 38 00:02:15,639 --> 00:02:18,959 Speaker 1: Krishna or whatever it is. But if they're coming through 39 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,120 Speaker 1: on TikTok. I just wonder what the I'd like to 40 00:02:21,120 --> 00:02:23,359 Speaker 1: know what the response rate is, Like how many people 41 00:02:24,000 --> 00:02:28,440 Speaker 1: change their religious feelings based on somebody's TikTok comment. I 42 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:30,560 Speaker 1: actually like to know, like, is it a good tool? 43 00:02:30,600 --> 00:02:33,520 Speaker 1: Is it a good free tool for you know, finding 44 00:02:33,520 --> 00:02:40,359 Speaker 1: God and Jesus? So I'm curious. My guest today is 45 00:02:40,440 --> 00:02:46,080 Speaker 1: former NFL player and TV personality Colton Underwood. So Colton 46 00:02:46,160 --> 00:02:49,520 Speaker 1: played as a defensive end for the Eagles, Chargers and 47 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:53,160 Speaker 1: Raiders and then went on to appear on the Bachelorette 48 00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:57,280 Speaker 1: and then as the star of the Bachelor. He has 49 00:02:57,520 --> 00:03:01,960 Speaker 1: had so many explosive moments in his life and career, 50 00:03:02,639 --> 00:03:06,360 Speaker 1: and in one Colton came out as gay and began 51 00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:10,280 Speaker 1: filming his new Netflix show, Coming Out Colton. He's an 52 00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:24,160 Speaker 1: amazing philanthropist and his story is fascinating. Enjoy. Hello, Hi, Bethany, 53 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:27,360 Speaker 1: how are you? I'm great, Nice to meet you. Nice 54 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:30,400 Speaker 1: to meet you too. Where are you? I am in 55 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:34,280 Speaker 1: Los Angeles right now? Is that where your home is now? Um? 56 00:03:34,320 --> 00:03:35,960 Speaker 1: And you grew up in did you grew up in 57 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 1: Illinois or Indiana? Mix? In my eyes, I was born 58 00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:42,600 Speaker 1: in Indiana, grew up in Illinois. Oh you did so, 59 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:45,200 Speaker 1: I got okay, I got my eyes right, Um okay. 60 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:48,360 Speaker 1: And are your parents still there, like in the same 61 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,600 Speaker 1: house that you grew up in. No, so my parents 62 00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,880 Speaker 1: are in Colorado now, but the rest of my family 63 00:03:53,080 --> 00:03:57,080 Speaker 1: is still in my hometown in Illinois. And do you 64 00:03:57,160 --> 00:04:01,440 Speaker 1: feel like you're a small town guy? Definitely? I mean 65 00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:06,120 Speaker 1: I think growing up pretty much surrounded by cornfields, really, 66 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,800 Speaker 1: I would consider myself a Midwestern small town guy for sure. 67 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:13,840 Speaker 1: And were you like a star athlete in high school? Um? Yeah, 68 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:16,560 Speaker 1: I mean for the most part, our town was like 69 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:19,000 Speaker 1: your typical Friday night lights where it just shut down 70 00:04:19,320 --> 00:04:24,159 Speaker 1: and you know, like the shops closed at five so 71 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,560 Speaker 1: everybody can make it to the game and support, and 72 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:29,240 Speaker 1: it was it was cute and fun. Wow. Did you 73 00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:31,120 Speaker 1: have you assigned a girl the way that they are 74 00:04:31,120 --> 00:04:32,839 Speaker 1: on Friday night lights that would bake cookies for you 75 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:34,159 Speaker 1: on the day of the game and be sort of 76 00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:38,160 Speaker 1: your assigned cheerleader. Yeah. So our cheerleader would actually design 77 00:04:38,160 --> 00:04:41,080 Speaker 1: our footballs, and um, every week it would sort of 78 00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 1: rotate and change and they would design him and slap 79 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:45,240 Speaker 1: them on the halls in the in in high school. 80 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:47,159 Speaker 1: So that really is accurate. I mean, I lived for 81 00:04:47,160 --> 00:04:49,960 Speaker 1: that show, but that really is accurate, the portrayal. It's 82 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:52,720 Speaker 1: totally it's totally true. And I mean growing up, I 83 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,960 Speaker 1: was like the typical football captain dating the cheerleading captain. 84 00:04:56,160 --> 00:04:58,680 Speaker 1: So it was like, you know, truly of Friday night lights. 85 00:04:58,680 --> 00:05:03,200 Speaker 1: Feel wow. Okay, So, um, you have a lot that 86 00:05:03,279 --> 00:05:06,640 Speaker 1: you're involved in, like a lot to identify with, from 87 00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:11,080 Speaker 1: charities that you work on to the Netflix show to 88 00:05:11,279 --> 00:05:14,320 Speaker 1: a new show. But I'm sure you're always typecast as 89 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:17,600 Speaker 1: the bachelor that world. That's the biggest thing. Like me, 90 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:19,440 Speaker 1: I'm always gonna be a housewife no matter what. I 91 00:05:19,960 --> 00:05:22,080 Speaker 1: could run for president, but I'd still be the housewife. 92 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:26,479 Speaker 1: So what is your goal? What is your brand? How 93 00:05:26,480 --> 00:05:30,120 Speaker 1: do you identify yourself in in business or entertainment this 94 00:05:30,200 --> 00:05:35,279 Speaker 1: whole world of uh sort of media. I guess well, 95 00:05:35,440 --> 00:05:37,479 Speaker 1: if you would have asked me that question a little 96 00:05:37,480 --> 00:05:39,839 Speaker 1: over a year ago, I wouldn't have really had an answer. 97 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:42,960 Speaker 1: But I think now since coming out, I'm way more 98 00:05:43,040 --> 00:05:46,400 Speaker 1: creative than I've ever been. Um, just the creativity that 99 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:48,920 Speaker 1: I have in the entertainment industry, just as far as 100 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,960 Speaker 1: whether it's on camera or behind the camera, and developing 101 00:05:51,960 --> 00:05:56,720 Speaker 1: and creating new concepts, new shows, producing things. Um is 102 00:05:56,760 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 1: such an interest and passion and love of mine. Now, UM, 103 00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:00,839 Speaker 1: I don't think there's any thing wrong with saying like 104 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:03,640 Speaker 1: I love being on camera. I really enjoy the entertainment 105 00:06:03,680 --> 00:06:06,559 Speaker 1: aspect of it in filming shows. But at the same time, 106 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:09,840 Speaker 1: now to protect my mental health, UM, and what I've 107 00:06:09,839 --> 00:06:12,679 Speaker 1: been through the last two years, I've really dug into 108 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:16,560 Speaker 1: behind the camera and creating a couple of new shows, 109 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:19,520 Speaker 1: both scripted and unscripted, and then also working on a 110 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:22,159 Speaker 1: doc to and a children's animation show. So it's just 111 00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:25,640 Speaker 1: a lot, a lot going on creativity like which has 112 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:29,040 Speaker 1: been so so fun for me to work on. Well, 113 00:06:29,080 --> 00:06:33,839 Speaker 1: two things one, UM, and I want who you mentioned 114 00:06:33,880 --> 00:06:37,040 Speaker 1: since coming up? Do you mean since actually coming out 115 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,839 Speaker 1: or since the show coming out? Like meaning coming out 116 00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:42,960 Speaker 1: as a gay man means you just feel like you're 117 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:46,480 Speaker 1: able to be more creative because you could have been 118 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:49,400 Speaker 1: created before as a straight as a seemingly straight man, 119 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:52,520 Speaker 1: or do you mean just since the project? I No, 120 00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:55,440 Speaker 1: I mean since I have like this relief for this 121 00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 1: inner piece, I don't have to compartmentalize so much of 122 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,000 Speaker 1: my life where these people can't be these people because 123 00:07:01,080 --> 00:07:03,080 Speaker 1: I used to lie against each other because I was 124 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:05,039 Speaker 1: off doing something else that I didn't want them both 125 00:07:05,080 --> 00:07:08,279 Speaker 1: to know of. Um, you know, you you really realize 126 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 1: how heavy it weighs. I didn't realize how heavy it 127 00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:14,440 Speaker 1: was weighing on me until after I came out of 128 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:16,560 Speaker 1: now all of a sudden, having this freedom and this 129 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:19,480 Speaker 1: lightness of connecting people in my life that I don't like. 130 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,280 Speaker 1: All my world's got to come together and it was 131 00:07:22,320 --> 00:07:24,680 Speaker 1: beautiful and I just sort of got to live this 132 00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:28,080 Speaker 1: stress free and then it sort of spun the creativity 133 00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:30,720 Speaker 1: and just let me be myself and express myself how 134 00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:34,640 Speaker 1: I want to. Was there anything positive about having compartmentalized lives? 135 00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:39,520 Speaker 1: Was there anything interesting about being two different people? I guess, oh, 136 00:07:39,720 --> 00:07:43,320 Speaker 1: I mean interesting. Yes, the thrill of it was always 137 00:07:43,400 --> 00:07:47,480 Speaker 1: fun and weirdly like, but it wasn't healthy. Um. There 138 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,680 Speaker 1: there was like a weird thrill that I found in 139 00:07:49,680 --> 00:07:52,160 Speaker 1: like sort of living a double life. But um, at 140 00:07:52,160 --> 00:07:54,360 Speaker 1: the end of the day, it also led to a 141 00:07:54,480 --> 00:07:57,800 Speaker 1: huge toll on my mental health that, um, you know, 142 00:07:58,200 --> 00:08:01,720 Speaker 1: it was pretty well documented it. But also I just 143 00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:04,280 Speaker 1: struggled with like you were Superman, you had to be 144 00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:09,600 Speaker 1: two different people. Um, So when did you realize that 145 00:08:09,640 --> 00:08:12,440 Speaker 1: you were gay? I realized that I was different probably 146 00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:14,200 Speaker 1: by the age of six, and then I couldn't really 147 00:08:14,200 --> 00:08:17,640 Speaker 1: process being gay and what what. I didn't process what 148 00:08:17,680 --> 00:08:19,920 Speaker 1: it meant to be different until high school until like I, 149 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:22,560 Speaker 1: you know, start figuring out, oh, this is my sexuality 150 00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:25,520 Speaker 1: that I really am having an issue with here. Um. 151 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:28,680 Speaker 1: And then by that time, you know, I was playing 152 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:33,199 Speaker 1: football and grew up in a conservative house with religion, 153 00:08:33,440 --> 00:08:36,959 Speaker 1: going to church every you know, Friday and Sunday. Um, 154 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:39,160 Speaker 1: So I didn't have room to explore that that was 155 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:40,680 Speaker 1: like a no note for me. It was a sin. 156 00:08:40,920 --> 00:08:43,040 Speaker 1: It was not okay in our society, and I just 157 00:08:43,080 --> 00:08:45,839 Speaker 1: couldn't couldn't go there with myself. So I just really 158 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,800 Speaker 1: brought it inside and just made a pack that I 159 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,560 Speaker 1: couldn't be gay, and I wanted to do whatever I 160 00:08:50,559 --> 00:08:52,760 Speaker 1: could to be straight. But when you're young and you 161 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:56,280 Speaker 1: say different, what is different? What feels? What feels different? 162 00:08:56,320 --> 00:08:59,800 Speaker 1: You just don't feel like you're quote unquote masculine, because 163 00:08:59,800 --> 00:09:03,239 Speaker 1: that's change now as as as as it relates to sexuality, 164 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:06,680 Speaker 1: So what what is different? It was just it was 165 00:09:06,720 --> 00:09:09,079 Speaker 1: just a feeling. I mean and and that's what you know, 166 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,960 Speaker 1: when like the bill that's that's being passed in Florida 167 00:09:13,080 --> 00:09:14,960 Speaker 1: right now, when people bring that up, you know, for 168 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:18,120 Speaker 1: kids to feel safe, to be able to explore that, 169 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:22,360 Speaker 1: I like, I understand what they're talking about, like having 170 00:09:22,360 --> 00:09:25,720 Speaker 1: that freedom of expression and to have that trust in 171 00:09:25,760 --> 00:09:28,000 Speaker 1: a teacher, be able to ask questions when you're young, 172 00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:31,040 Speaker 1: because I didn't have that, but I knew I was different. 173 00:09:31,040 --> 00:09:34,360 Speaker 1: But I also I could learn through social cues that like, 174 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,360 Speaker 1: oh I can't I can't explore this, I can't be 175 00:09:37,480 --> 00:09:40,480 Speaker 1: that way. It's it's hard to explain. But at the 176 00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:43,040 Speaker 1: end of the day, I remember there was a strong feeling, 177 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:46,040 Speaker 1: a strong urge for me just to you know, I 178 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:48,720 Speaker 1: was different than the other boys in the class. I was, 179 00:09:48,840 --> 00:09:50,840 Speaker 1: you know, I wasn't attracted to the girls. And it 180 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:53,439 Speaker 1: wasn't in a weird cutie way. It was a cutie way. 181 00:09:53,520 --> 00:09:57,040 Speaker 1: It was like a weird just you know. It wasn't 182 00:09:57,120 --> 00:10:00,079 Speaker 1: that it wasn't an attraction, but that and society he 183 00:10:00,240 --> 00:10:04,040 Speaker 1: was making boy meets girl, Princess, Prince captures Prince princess, 184 00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,520 Speaker 1: and so all that was feeling weird, totally interesting. That's 185 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:08,599 Speaker 1: really interesting. And I guess children's books are gonna have 186 00:10:08,640 --> 00:10:13,760 Speaker 1: to really change too. Um, And did you through throughout 187 00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:18,360 Speaker 1: high school and college and professional what was it like 188 00:10:18,440 --> 00:10:21,240 Speaker 1: in the locker room? Like, just because you could observe 189 00:10:21,320 --> 00:10:23,920 Speaker 1: from a totally different perspective, So is there so much 190 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 1: bro anti gay? Did people somehow think that you weren't 191 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:32,480 Speaker 1: the same as them? What was that like? Actually, the 192 00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:34,960 Speaker 1: best way that I can explain a locker room both 193 00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:37,880 Speaker 1: in high school and in college and well not not 194 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:40,199 Speaker 1: so much professionally, but in high school and in college 195 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:43,760 Speaker 1: it's the most homo erotic and homophobic place that you 196 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:47,400 Speaker 1: can be a part of. So while there's like people 197 00:10:47,720 --> 00:10:51,560 Speaker 1: literally slap each other's asses or make comments about dick sizes, 198 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:54,320 Speaker 1: there's also the like when you stare too long, it's 199 00:10:54,360 --> 00:10:57,520 Speaker 1: you know, being called a faggot or saying oh, you know, 200 00:10:57,600 --> 00:11:00,240 Speaker 1: like making a gay joke like that and really turning 201 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:03,560 Speaker 1: it into like homophobia very quickly. So it was so 202 00:11:03,679 --> 00:11:06,840 Speaker 1: confusing for me when I'm sitting here like Okay, wait, 203 00:11:06,960 --> 00:11:09,360 Speaker 1: this is allowed, but like this isn't and you can 204 00:11:09,400 --> 00:11:10,800 Speaker 1: do this, but as long as you don't do it 205 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:15,520 Speaker 1: too long. Yeah, So then you're trying to fit in, 206 00:11:15,600 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 1: but also like you don't weirdly want to be called 207 00:11:17,480 --> 00:11:20,800 Speaker 1: out and it's just uh, I will say this, the 208 00:11:20,800 --> 00:11:24,160 Speaker 1: locker room is a messed up place for a gay 209 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:26,680 Speaker 1: man that is closeted to be in. That sounds like 210 00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:30,120 Speaker 1: that's crazy. That makes a lot of sense. Um. So, 211 00:11:30,679 --> 00:11:34,080 Speaker 1: as a person who's been on reality television and um, 212 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,679 Speaker 1: you know pretty good at it and from producing and 213 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:41,480 Speaker 1: a starring standpoint, I understand saving good content because you 214 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:44,880 Speaker 1: also are aware that you can't get that moment back 215 00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,120 Speaker 1: and it's not going to be authentic and genuine, and 216 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:51,000 Speaker 1: you may feel like you're uh, it's fraud to sort 217 00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,640 Speaker 1: of reduce something too for an audience. And I'm sure 218 00:11:53,640 --> 00:11:55,160 Speaker 1: there was a lot of that on The Bachelor, because 219 00:11:55,160 --> 00:11:57,319 Speaker 1: it's much more manufactured than the show that I was on. 220 00:11:57,720 --> 00:12:03,800 Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure. So, um, waiting to tell your parents 221 00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:08,040 Speaker 1: who grew up in a Christian Friday night lights town 222 00:12:08,600 --> 00:12:11,400 Speaker 1: that you were gay and now you're an adult and 223 00:12:11,480 --> 00:12:14,520 Speaker 1: you were on a boat I with your dad right, Like, 224 00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 1: what the hell with that decision? And what happened? And 225 00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,480 Speaker 1: what was that like a were you having anxiety like 226 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,800 Speaker 1: you're about to propose? What was that whole soup about Yeah. 227 00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:27,800 Speaker 1: I mean it was extremely nerve racking, and you know, 228 00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:31,280 Speaker 1: I believed in my family I did, I wouldn't have 229 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:33,719 Speaker 1: put them in a position. I don't. I don't think 230 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,120 Speaker 1: in my heart of hearts, I would have ever set 231 00:12:35,160 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 1: them up for failure. And I knew that the mission 232 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:39,720 Speaker 1: and the goal behind filming and documenting this was so 233 00:12:39,760 --> 00:12:42,880 Speaker 1: that kids that might see themselves in me, they wouldn't 234 00:12:42,920 --> 00:12:44,880 Speaker 1: have to go through the same struggles in pain that 235 00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:47,160 Speaker 1: I went through. Um at the end of the day. 236 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:49,600 Speaker 1: So that was ultimately the decision why I said yes 237 00:12:49,679 --> 00:12:54,520 Speaker 1: to do the show. UM. And I knew you can't 238 00:12:54,840 --> 00:12:58,600 Speaker 1: recreate a coming out. You can't. You cannot know. My 239 00:12:58,679 --> 00:13:01,320 Speaker 1: dad's not I'm not an actor. My dad's actor. We 240 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,400 Speaker 1: can't put this show on if it isn't real and 241 00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,480 Speaker 1: genuine and raw. And that is exactly what this was. 242 00:13:07,559 --> 00:13:11,160 Speaker 1: And I can't say enough things about the production company 243 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:12,880 Speaker 1: that I worked with. I mean, coming from the show 244 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,480 Speaker 1: I did, UM, you know, they really put a human 245 00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:19,280 Speaker 1: element first, UM, realizing like, hey, this is my life 246 00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:22,320 Speaker 1: and my family's you know here and vulnerable with me, 247 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:25,360 Speaker 1: so like please just respect. And the cameras were really 248 00:13:25,400 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 1: backed up for that scene with my dad, they were 249 00:13:27,440 --> 00:13:30,559 Speaker 1: not in our in our grill and think they obviously 250 00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:32,439 Speaker 1: we were miked up and he didn't know what the 251 00:13:32,480 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 1: conversation was going to be, but the cameras weren't in 252 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:37,600 Speaker 1: our face. They respected sort of the distance and privacy 253 00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:39,520 Speaker 1: and left it to an intimate moment between the two 254 00:13:39,520 --> 00:13:42,719 Speaker 1: of us. And I mean, it was well documented on 255 00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:45,800 Speaker 1: the show, but my family has been amazing. That's amazing. 256 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,600 Speaker 1: That's and I understand what you're saying. You chose the 257 00:13:48,679 --> 00:13:50,880 Speaker 1: journey for all these other people who are in pain, 258 00:13:51,440 --> 00:13:54,960 Speaker 1: from six years old to adult to married men, you know, 259 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:58,400 Speaker 1: to to to have that be meaningful. It's true, that 260 00:13:58,480 --> 00:14:00,200 Speaker 1: makes sense. That makes makes a lot of sense to me. 261 00:14:00,240 --> 00:14:02,439 Speaker 1: And what about your siblings, And did your parents say 262 00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:04,280 Speaker 1: that they sort of knew? We sort of knew, We 263 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,600 Speaker 1: always sort of knew. They always say, you know, yeah. 264 00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:09,600 Speaker 1: I mean, my grandma was more the one that and 265 00:14:09,679 --> 00:14:11,520 Speaker 1: she didn't make it in the final cut of the show. 266 00:14:11,559 --> 00:14:14,400 Speaker 1: But my grandma is like I've known for a long time. 267 00:14:14,440 --> 00:14:16,960 Speaker 1: I've just been waiting and saying with my best friend Cassidy, 268 00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:20,200 Speaker 1: She's like, I've just been waiting and you know, I 269 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:23,040 Speaker 1: wish that I would have trusted people a little bit 270 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:27,239 Speaker 1: earlier on in my life and given them an opportunity 271 00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:29,120 Speaker 1: to really be there for me and support me like 272 00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,360 Speaker 1: they were in this show. But everybody has their own 273 00:14:32,360 --> 00:14:34,880 Speaker 1: path to coming out. There is no right or wrong time. 274 00:14:34,920 --> 00:14:38,040 Speaker 1: It's a defense mechanism to be very honest with you. 275 00:14:38,200 --> 00:14:40,320 Speaker 1: Just as far as for me, I just it was 276 00:14:40,360 --> 00:14:43,280 Speaker 1: a survival like I had to survive, and I did 277 00:14:43,280 --> 00:14:45,560 Speaker 1: not feel like I would survive in a in the 278 00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:48,040 Speaker 1: football culture by coming out. Yeah, you felt like you 279 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:49,600 Speaker 1: were a dog and you weren't going to be a 280 00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:51,240 Speaker 1: cat or a cat and you couldn't be a dog, 281 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:54,480 Speaker 1: like it's what you were. That's interesting. What about your teammates? 282 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:56,480 Speaker 1: So they did any of them ever have full circle 283 00:14:56,600 --> 00:14:58,960 Speaker 1: moments remembering things they had said to you or like 284 00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:00,880 Speaker 1: and call you and say, oh my god, I'm so 285 00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:05,160 Speaker 1: sorry we suck or whatever. Yeah, I understand. It was interesting. 286 00:15:05,320 --> 00:15:07,840 Speaker 1: I had a handful of both players and coaches reach 287 00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:11,120 Speaker 1: out to me and apologize and support and I was 288 00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:13,360 Speaker 1: never looking for an apology. But also, you know a 289 00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,200 Speaker 1: handful of them saying like, how can I do better? 290 00:15:15,280 --> 00:15:18,120 Speaker 1: How can we make this more accepting? And then I 291 00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:21,680 Speaker 1: also had a handful of players calling confide in me 292 00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:26,120 Speaker 1: and come out and literally literally they're struggling going through 293 00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:29,120 Speaker 1: it right now, and sadly a couple of them have 294 00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:31,160 Speaker 1: families like and they just don't know what to do. 295 00:15:31,240 --> 00:15:33,920 Speaker 1: And that would have been me, And I think that's 296 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,880 Speaker 1: like such an like for me. I can take that 297 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:38,160 Speaker 1: perspective because I would have done anything in the world 298 00:15:38,240 --> 00:15:40,160 Speaker 1: at that time of my life to be straight. I 299 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,360 Speaker 1: was trying so hard to get engaged. I was trying 300 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,600 Speaker 1: so hard to get a wife and to have kids 301 00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:47,160 Speaker 1: because I always truly believed in my heart of hearts. 302 00:15:47,160 --> 00:15:49,440 Speaker 1: So further along I've got in a straight relationship the 303 00:15:49,480 --> 00:15:53,520 Speaker 1: straight or I would become and obviously that's not the case. 304 00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:55,920 Speaker 1: And I would not want anything more in my life 305 00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:58,720 Speaker 1: than to not be gay right now, Like, I love 306 00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:00,480 Speaker 1: being gay. It's the best thing that's happened to me, 307 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:04,360 Speaker 1: and the freedom. But you realize all of these people 308 00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,960 Speaker 1: that are are not living their authentic life and they're 309 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,840 Speaker 1: miserable in some aspect of their life. Well can you 310 00:16:12,080 --> 00:16:14,200 Speaker 1: So you're what if you're gay and you have a 311 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:18,400 Speaker 1: great wife and great kids, Like, how do we know 312 00:16:18,520 --> 00:16:22,680 Speaker 1: if it's worth Because because sex is not the most 313 00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:25,600 Speaker 1: important part in a relationship. So if someone, you know, 314 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,040 Speaker 1: I could see how someone has all these different elements. 315 00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:30,720 Speaker 1: Maybe they're successful, maybe they have a beautiful, amazing wife 316 00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 1: who's their best friend, and kids and and this family, 317 00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:36,520 Speaker 1: and is it always worth the sacrifice for everyone if 318 00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:39,160 Speaker 1: it's to be who they really are sexually, But then 319 00:16:39,240 --> 00:16:41,800 Speaker 1: they have this family, Like I wonder if some people 320 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:45,000 Speaker 1: are just weighing all the puzzle pieces. You don't yet 321 00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:47,080 Speaker 1: have kids in a family, Like I wonder if you 322 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:49,120 Speaker 1: had had a great wife who is a great person 323 00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:50,840 Speaker 1: and kids, you know what I mean. So I wonder 324 00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:52,800 Speaker 1: about that. I'm asking you kind of about that part 325 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:56,320 Speaker 1: of it. You know, it's it's tough because I believe 326 00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:59,320 Speaker 1: that sexuality is on on a spectrum and on a scale. 327 00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,280 Speaker 1: You know, I still identify as a gay man, but 328 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:05,600 Speaker 1: there's a percentage of what I am attracted to that 329 00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:08,480 Speaker 1: I can I'm still attracted to females like not, but 330 00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:12,160 Speaker 1: that that is my preference. And I would not identify 331 00:17:12,280 --> 00:17:13,919 Speaker 1: a straight And I know that might be confusing to 332 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:16,439 Speaker 1: audience in our society today of like how can you 333 00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:18,600 Speaker 1: be both or how can you like both? But I 334 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,720 Speaker 1: was still in the gay man um and just as 335 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:24,680 Speaker 1: I have this the spectrum. Uh, I would say too 336 00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:28,679 Speaker 1: married and having a family. It just depends on what 337 00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,280 Speaker 1: you want out of your life. Like if you are 338 00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:33,680 Speaker 1: just like, if you're happy and content and you love 339 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,439 Speaker 1: your wife and you love your family, you love the 340 00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:37,480 Speaker 1: life that you build, then go for it. I mean, 341 00:17:37,520 --> 00:17:42,440 Speaker 1: I think we all have temptations of you know, uh, 342 00:17:42,760 --> 00:17:45,919 Speaker 1: fantasies and sex and whatever that looks like. I just 343 00:17:46,240 --> 00:17:48,520 Speaker 1: as long as you have these healthy conversations with your 344 00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:51,600 Speaker 1: significant other, I think that it can you can work 345 00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,399 Speaker 1: through it. But as soon as you start living a 346 00:17:53,440 --> 00:17:58,080 Speaker 1: double life, it's a slippery slope. Oh yeah, I think 347 00:17:58,119 --> 00:18:00,119 Speaker 1: that's I think that's interesting now because I think there 348 00:18:00,119 --> 00:18:03,080 Speaker 1: are you know, people who are in heterosexual marriages who 349 00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:05,159 Speaker 1: also have fantasies about different things too. So I just 350 00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:07,199 Speaker 1: wanted to ask that question, because you have been in 351 00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:12,359 Speaker 1: many relationships with women and were they did they feel 352 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 1: wrong or did they feel good? Maybe? In other words, 353 00:18:15,720 --> 00:18:17,119 Speaker 1: you could be in a relationship with a man and 354 00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:18,960 Speaker 1: it might not be right. It might not have been 355 00:18:19,400 --> 00:18:21,560 Speaker 1: wrong just because they were a woman. It might have 356 00:18:21,560 --> 00:18:23,479 Speaker 1: been wrong just because of who they were. Did you 357 00:18:23,520 --> 00:18:28,080 Speaker 1: have successful relationships with women that were sexually successful also 358 00:18:28,160 --> 00:18:33,359 Speaker 1: that we're good, they just weren't like really truly authentically you. Yeah, 359 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:35,320 Speaker 1: there was always looking back at it now, there was 360 00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:39,440 Speaker 1: always a moment before I really committed to any um 361 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:42,480 Speaker 1: of my previous relationships with women. It was always like 362 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:45,199 Speaker 1: a hitch. There was always that this doesn't feel right, 363 00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:47,560 Speaker 1: but I have to do this like that, you know, 364 00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:49,960 Speaker 1: I gotta get over this, like little hitch. And I 365 00:18:49,960 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 1: could never explain what that was. Um, And I was 366 00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,480 Speaker 1: in love with I've been in love with women, and 367 00:18:56,600 --> 00:19:01,240 Speaker 1: I have you know, had sexual experiences with women and 368 00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:05,359 Speaker 1: been completely satisfied as well. Um, But it's it was 369 00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:07,160 Speaker 1: a matter of like, really, truly, what do I want 370 00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:10,560 Speaker 1: out of my life? Why? You know, why why am 371 00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:13,879 Speaker 1: I miserable internally? And why am I struggling deep down 372 00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:17,439 Speaker 1: like when you know a relationship ended, and you know, 373 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,640 Speaker 1: why do I feel like this was meant to be 374 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:25,800 Speaker 1: when clearly I'm struggling with who I am. So it 375 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:30,439 Speaker 1: was confusing. It was a confusing time. And also I 376 00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,840 Speaker 1: wonder what Freud would have a field day about you 377 00:19:32,960 --> 00:19:35,879 Speaker 1: going into a show where you're supposed to be the 378 00:19:35,880 --> 00:19:40,679 Speaker 1: most masculine person ever, that is choosing a woman and 379 00:19:40,760 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 1: giving her a rose, Like it's all those fairy tales 380 00:19:43,840 --> 00:19:46,960 Speaker 1: that you were confused about as a kid. So, um, 381 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:50,879 Speaker 1: was it because you liked you wanted to find the woman? 382 00:19:51,119 --> 00:19:53,040 Speaker 1: Was it also you liked the idea? And who doesn't 383 00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:54,800 Speaker 1: want to be on television as the bachelor? Like that 384 00:19:54,800 --> 00:19:57,480 Speaker 1: sounds great and as you're on the bachelorette too, So 385 00:19:57,800 --> 00:20:01,040 Speaker 1: tell me about that whole decisions Arnery journey. Do you 386 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:03,359 Speaker 1: feel like a bit of a fraud? You know what 387 00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:05,560 Speaker 1: did that all feel like? I mean, I definitely felt 388 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:07,960 Speaker 1: like a fraud, but I also felt like that was 389 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:11,000 Speaker 1: my attempt to convert myself. That was my attempt to 390 00:20:11,040 --> 00:20:14,120 Speaker 1: become straight. Uh, and I was doing it in such 391 00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:17,119 Speaker 1: a fun way like it was it was a little 392 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:21,359 Speaker 1: you know, obviously looking back now, it was it was 393 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:25,000 Speaker 1: messed up on how I handled certain things. But the 394 00:20:25,040 --> 00:20:27,680 Speaker 1: way the whole process and the way it shook out, 395 00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:29,760 Speaker 1: you know, I had people saying, what a waste of 396 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,600 Speaker 1: a season, right, and you dated thirty women? You wasted 397 00:20:32,600 --> 00:20:35,440 Speaker 1: our time, fraud, And then I'm sitting here like, well, 398 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,280 Speaker 1: I don't I truly don't believe I would have came 399 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:39,800 Speaker 1: out if it wasn't for the show, Because at the 400 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,199 Speaker 1: end of the day, if I wasn't a show, if 401 00:20:42,240 --> 00:20:44,280 Speaker 1: I didn't have the show, I didn't become a public figure. 402 00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:46,520 Speaker 1: And if I wasn't a public figure, I wasn't getting blackmailed. 403 00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:48,399 Speaker 1: And then if I wasn't getting blackmailed, you wouldn't have 404 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:50,240 Speaker 1: forced my hand to have to come out, and I 405 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:53,320 Speaker 1: wouldn't have had this mental spiral that like really truly 406 00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:57,640 Speaker 1: had awaking, you know, I got, you know, pretty much 407 00:20:57,840 --> 00:20:59,760 Speaker 1: woke up and just said, hey, you have like you 408 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,639 Speaker 1: have to stop doing this to your life. So in 409 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:06,359 Speaker 1: a really roundabout weird way, without the show, I don't 410 00:21:06,520 --> 00:21:08,560 Speaker 1: think I would have ever came up. And the girls 411 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:12,600 Speaker 1: were enraged about the wasting of the season for them. No, honestly, 412 00:21:12,720 --> 00:21:14,520 Speaker 1: the majority of the girls reached out to me, and 413 00:21:15,480 --> 00:21:19,080 Speaker 1: you know, we're not only thankful but supportive to to 414 00:21:19,119 --> 00:21:23,200 Speaker 1: be part of the process. Obviously, they wish, they probably 415 00:21:23,240 --> 00:21:25,040 Speaker 1: wish they would have had somebody who was a little 416 00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:28,640 Speaker 1: more suitable for for them on the show. But they 417 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:30,800 Speaker 1: were great, and I mean, look, let's be honest. You know, 418 00:21:30,880 --> 00:21:32,840 Speaker 1: those girls came on the show to have a good 419 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:35,560 Speaker 1: time too and travel a little bit be on the show. 420 00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:38,000 Speaker 1: So you know, you could go on match dot com 421 00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:40,080 Speaker 1: you don't have they're on the batch for a little 422 00:21:40,080 --> 00:21:42,760 Speaker 1: bit of sizzle. Yeah, I agree, I get that too. 423 00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:46,600 Speaker 1: Do you mind being sort of a poster child for 424 00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:49,040 Speaker 1: that world of the backstorm batchelor At you're trying to 425 00:21:49,080 --> 00:21:52,000 Speaker 1: do other things and produce other shows, would you go 426 00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:54,440 Speaker 1: back in any capacity you're doing and you're doing another 427 00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:58,800 Speaker 1: show beyond the edge? Another show? Yeah? And what is that? Well, 428 00:21:58,920 --> 00:22:02,680 Speaker 1: beyond the beyond the what I I've done a lot 429 00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:05,320 Speaker 1: of shows and coming out Coulton was special, but beyond 430 00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:07,720 Speaker 1: the Edge. I'm so proud of how how it turned 431 00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,440 Speaker 1: out and so proud to be part of that cast, 432 00:22:09,840 --> 00:22:12,680 Speaker 1: just because the meaning behind the show of us all 433 00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:17,000 Speaker 1: coming from different race, religions, backgrounds, financial situations getting dumped 434 00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,879 Speaker 1: in the jungle together. We all have different beliefs politically 435 00:22:20,280 --> 00:22:23,959 Speaker 1: and different values, and we work together, We love on 436 00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:26,840 Speaker 1: one another, we come together to support each other as 437 00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:30,400 Speaker 1: we raise money for our charities, and it's so relevant 438 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,280 Speaker 1: in today's world. You know, I had I was at 439 00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:36,960 Speaker 1: the party last night, the premier party of CBS UM 440 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,600 Speaker 1: one of the CBS exec said, you know this is 441 00:22:39,840 --> 00:22:42,840 Speaker 1: in the world's hands now, and are for them to 442 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:45,680 Speaker 1: decide if they really want to root for a show 443 00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:49,000 Speaker 1: that is unity and coming together versus the decisiveness in 444 00:22:49,040 --> 00:22:51,880 Speaker 1: the in the fighting and the bickering. This is not 445 00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:54,080 Speaker 1: that type of show. This is not Survivor, This is 446 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:56,560 Speaker 1: not alliance. This, this is not pitting people against each other. 447 00:22:56,840 --> 00:22:59,000 Speaker 1: This is about coming together. And that's what I think 448 00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:02,560 Speaker 1: makes a show different and meaningful and right now in particular, 449 00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:06,120 Speaker 1: we need that exactly so much garbage. So you are 450 00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:08,960 Speaker 1: you not? Are you not interested in the Bachelor anymore? 451 00:23:09,000 --> 00:23:10,879 Speaker 1: Is that world still part of who you are? Like 452 00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,159 Speaker 1: they have all these sort of recycled shows where you 453 00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,679 Speaker 1: go back in and and or do they ask you 454 00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:17,439 Speaker 1: to do these things? Or do you not interested in 455 00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:20,040 Speaker 1: that anymore? I mean not from this, not from the 456 00:23:20,040 --> 00:23:24,560 Speaker 1: Bachelor production, um directly. But I was pitched gay Bachelor 457 00:23:24,760 --> 00:23:26,840 Speaker 1: right after I came out by a couple of different 458 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,560 Speaker 1: networks and streaming services and it just wasn't of interest 459 00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,399 Speaker 1: of me. It wasn't I've been there, done that, and 460 00:23:31,440 --> 00:23:33,000 Speaker 1: I don't think it was the healthy thing for me 461 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:36,200 Speaker 1: to do. UM, So I am looking to do other things. 462 00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:41,320 Speaker 1: I love the entertainment industry, and I enjoy filming and 463 00:23:42,119 --> 00:23:46,119 Speaker 1: doing making great tv UM, so I'm I'm looking to 464 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:48,919 Speaker 1: do other things. I'm very respectful and thankful for the 465 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:52,200 Speaker 1: Bachelor franchise, but at the end of the day, business 466 00:23:52,280 --> 00:23:55,240 Speaker 1: is business, and they're onto their next one. They're already 467 00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:57,199 Speaker 1: thinking about the money that the next cast and the 468 00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,840 Speaker 1: next people are going to make them and I'm doing 469 00:23:59,880 --> 00:24:02,800 Speaker 1: my own things, so respectfully, we're just gonna win our 470 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:17,199 Speaker 1: separate ways, and you know, I'm good with that. What 471 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:19,439 Speaker 1: tell me about your charities? You have to one is 472 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:23,240 Speaker 1: is it MS is a muscular district free and cistic fibrosis. 473 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:26,399 Speaker 1: So my charity is cystic fibrosis that I'm playing for, 474 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:28,960 Speaker 1: and the money that we're raising here is to go 475 00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:32,400 Speaker 1: to another arm of the Legacy Foundation is what it's called, 476 00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:35,879 Speaker 1: and it's to support mental health too. So I'm fighting 477 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:38,240 Speaker 1: for the fight against cystic fibrosis and then also mental 478 00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:42,120 Speaker 1: health because cf UM, the cf medication, has come so 479 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,920 Speaker 1: far along in the last few years that now one 480 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:49,920 Speaker 1: of the biggest side effects to cystic fibrosis is depression 481 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:53,200 Speaker 1: and anxiety. So we're raising awareness and money for cystic 482 00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,920 Speaker 1: fibrosis and also mental health and do you think you'll 483 00:24:55,920 --> 00:25:00,240 Speaker 1: do anything connected to you know, being a free to 484 00:25:00,440 --> 00:25:02,639 Speaker 1: be out. Are you involved in in these kind of 485 00:25:02,640 --> 00:25:05,040 Speaker 1: causes too, because it's so on brand for you. Yeah, 486 00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:07,840 Speaker 1: I'm actually working on another project right now. It's the 487 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:11,640 Speaker 1: kids animation series that I'm working on to create meaningful 488 00:25:11,680 --> 00:25:15,919 Speaker 1: conversations for kids, UM called Pocket Friends, And one of 489 00:25:15,960 --> 00:25:18,639 Speaker 1: the main characters is Calvin, a chameleon and he blends 490 00:25:18,640 --> 00:25:24,240 Speaker 1: into his UM surroundings and struggles with his identity and UM, 491 00:25:24,280 --> 00:25:25,960 Speaker 1: it's a it's a Web three and n f T 492 00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,000 Speaker 1: project that I'm doing and a lot of the proceeds 493 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:30,800 Speaker 1: go for from Calvin. The proceeds go to the Trevor Project, 494 00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:33,760 Speaker 1: so I'm raising money for for them and then the 495 00:25:33,760 --> 00:25:36,160 Speaker 1: other the other charities that I support in the kids 496 00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:40,280 Speaker 1: animation series as Black Girl's Code, the Kind Campaign, UM 497 00:25:40,600 --> 00:25:45,080 Speaker 1: Body Positive Organization, and then also Learning Disabilities Association of America. 498 00:25:45,200 --> 00:25:48,280 Speaker 1: So it's a really meaningful show and something I'm really 499 00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:51,240 Speaker 1: excited for as like to the next step in my career. Oh, 500 00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:53,280 Speaker 1: that's so nice. Well, it's nice that you're doing philanthropy 501 00:25:53,320 --> 00:25:56,480 Speaker 1: in a meaningful way, so young, it's really nice. Um, 502 00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,160 Speaker 1: So you in a relationship. Now you are in a relationship, 503 00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:02,960 Speaker 1: aren't you. I'm yeah, I'm actually engaged. So uh. We 504 00:26:03,080 --> 00:26:05,800 Speaker 1: put a lot of work into our relationship really early on, 505 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:10,040 Speaker 1: and he's an unbelievable guy who has supported and loved 506 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:12,840 Speaker 1: on me since the very beginning. And I didn't know 507 00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:14,440 Speaker 1: I was looking for this, but as soon as I 508 00:26:14,480 --> 00:26:15,840 Speaker 1: found it, I did not want to let it go. 509 00:26:16,359 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 1: The meat Why does the media know that you don't 510 00:26:18,119 --> 00:26:20,280 Speaker 1: have a prenup? I just saw I read information on 511 00:26:20,359 --> 00:26:22,399 Speaker 1: people and then I go through and I don't, like, 512 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:24,040 Speaker 1: there's a lot of stuff in here that I'm not 513 00:26:24,080 --> 00:26:25,600 Speaker 1: bringing up because I don't. I'm I'm not like the 514 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:29,000 Speaker 1: gotcha salaceous person. But the media knows that you don't 515 00:26:29,040 --> 00:26:31,240 Speaker 1: have a prenup? Is that because you were interviewed about 516 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:33,560 Speaker 1: it and said you weren't getting one. That was a question. 517 00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:36,840 Speaker 1: It's an interesting question, yeah, for you actually from your world. 518 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:39,920 Speaker 1: Andy Cohen brought it off. I wanted to know why 519 00:26:40,040 --> 00:26:43,199 Speaker 1: we weren't signing a prenup, And you know, I just 520 00:26:43,280 --> 00:26:45,600 Speaker 1: jokingly said, which one does he think is like the 521 00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:49,080 Speaker 1: wealthy one? Like we we we're yeah, I was like, 522 00:26:49,080 --> 00:26:51,760 Speaker 1: we're in a relationship together. We discussed our finances. We 523 00:26:51,800 --> 00:26:54,640 Speaker 1: have joined accounts, like it's there's no secrets here, so 524 00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:57,320 Speaker 1: you know, like we're in a good place, We're in 525 00:26:57,320 --> 00:26:59,240 Speaker 1: our relationship, we're handling it the way we want to 526 00:26:59,280 --> 00:27:01,840 Speaker 1: handle it. Well, I'm ask you the reason he's saying that, 527 00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:04,040 Speaker 1: because I've also been through a hell and I am 528 00:27:04,080 --> 00:27:05,879 Speaker 1: older than you and I went through it almost ten 529 00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:09,160 Speaker 1: year divorce, is because I don't it doesn't even necessarily. 530 00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:12,560 Speaker 1: I think there should be custody um pre nups too, 531 00:27:12,600 --> 00:27:14,479 Speaker 1: because people only talk about the money. They don't talk 532 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:17,080 Speaker 1: about Okay, if we broke up, are you taking the kids? 533 00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:19,080 Speaker 1: Sixty percent or forty percent? You have to talk about 534 00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:22,240 Speaker 1: things like that because things do happen. But I think 535 00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,960 Speaker 1: he's probably saying it in the sense of to protect 536 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:28,040 Speaker 1: both people, just so everything's ironed out. If you make 537 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:31,119 Speaker 1: a billion dollars, you know, in your TV production company, 538 00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:33,840 Speaker 1: you become the Reese Witherspoon, and god forbid it doesn't 539 00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:37,119 Speaker 1: work out, you'll be giving half of that too. Uh, 540 00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:39,800 Speaker 1: your fiance and vice. First of he I don't know 541 00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:41,800 Speaker 1: what does he do for a living. He's a political 542 00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:46,160 Speaker 1: strategist and adviser and consultant. Got it okay, So I'm 543 00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:49,120 Speaker 1: just saying, but is it because you don't believe in them? 544 00:27:49,119 --> 00:27:51,320 Speaker 1: Because you think it's a poison injected in a relationship, 545 00:27:51,320 --> 00:27:53,320 Speaker 1: which I also do think. I'm just curious because I 546 00:27:53,359 --> 00:27:56,240 Speaker 1: have opinions. I don't love them. It's a legal document 547 00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:59,200 Speaker 1: in a romantic relationship. But I understand why there's a 548 00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:01,400 Speaker 1: need for them. And I I'm literally the number one 549 00:28:01,760 --> 00:28:03,879 Speaker 1: person who got fucked by having a bad one. The 550 00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:05,879 Speaker 1: number I mean literally, I don't know anybody. Well, can 551 00:28:05,920 --> 00:28:07,600 Speaker 1: I can I bring a new perspective to it for you? 552 00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:10,200 Speaker 1: So long perspective it is if I make a billion 553 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:13,080 Speaker 1: dollars of a new production company and doing what I 554 00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:16,639 Speaker 1: do creativity. In my opinion, he played a role in 555 00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:18,880 Speaker 1: helping me get there. Because I'm living with the man. 556 00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,119 Speaker 1: He is supporting me. He's cooking dinner at times for me. 557 00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:26,000 Speaker 1: He is taking care of me physically and mentally. Like 558 00:28:26,400 --> 00:28:28,199 Speaker 1: he's playing a role in my life right now to 559 00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:31,800 Speaker 1: allow me to be creative and to you know, connect 560 00:28:31,800 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 1: and be able to go take work dinners and be 561 00:28:33,520 --> 00:28:35,560 Speaker 1: able to work at nine o'clock at night and not 562 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:39,280 Speaker 1: you know, hold anything against me. So he's playing a 563 00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:42,000 Speaker 1: role in my opinion, not only my personal life, been 564 00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:45,120 Speaker 1: in my business life too. So there's no why would 565 00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:47,640 Speaker 1: I get that offer to do that out. So you 566 00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:49,600 Speaker 1: have a prenup, you just haven't written it down. You're 567 00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:51,480 Speaker 1: fine that then you have that you you got to 568 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:53,920 Speaker 1: said Andy, because I have a prenup, I am okay 569 00:28:53,960 --> 00:28:57,160 Speaker 1: with whatever if it doesn't work at him getting half 570 00:28:57,160 --> 00:28:59,760 Speaker 1: and vice versa if he okay, So you have a 571 00:29:00,040 --> 00:29:03,160 Speaker 1: know you have a yeah, I mean that's that's sort 572 00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:05,440 Speaker 1: of how I mean. I know most people they'd be like, 573 00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:07,200 Speaker 1: it's my money, don't touch it, and it's like, no, 574 00:29:07,240 --> 00:29:09,040 Speaker 1: this is I mean, we made a commitment to each 575 00:29:09,080 --> 00:29:10,880 Speaker 1: other that we're going to join and link our lives. 576 00:29:10,920 --> 00:29:14,680 Speaker 1: So this is part of the commitment. Is you know, hey, 577 00:29:14,760 --> 00:29:16,680 Speaker 1: you're you're here to support me. I'm here to support you. 578 00:29:16,760 --> 00:29:19,240 Speaker 1: And then you know, I just don't even want to 579 00:29:19,240 --> 00:29:22,200 Speaker 1: put that negativity out there. I understand where people say 580 00:29:22,480 --> 00:29:25,080 Speaker 1: is protecting and it's all this, but in my heart 581 00:29:25,080 --> 00:29:28,240 Speaker 1: of hearts, it's like you're supporting me and you're there 582 00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:29,880 Speaker 1: for me right now in this moment of my life. 583 00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:32,760 Speaker 1: So I got you. And I understand that too about 584 00:29:32,760 --> 00:29:35,120 Speaker 1: the negativity because I do think it's a poison, poison 585 00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:37,560 Speaker 1: inject into a relationship, which is why I think in 586 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:42,080 Speaker 1: the future people will consider um and do consider if 587 00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:43,760 Speaker 1: you have kids, it's different and I don't know if 588 00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:47,760 Speaker 1: you plan on having kids to do Yeah, okay, nice, 589 00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:49,800 Speaker 1: So if you have kids, it's different. But if you 590 00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:51,920 Speaker 1: don't have kids, or if each person already has kids. 591 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:54,320 Speaker 1: Some people argue there's no need to get married and 592 00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:56,200 Speaker 1: have a legal document about it will just be like 593 00:29:56,280 --> 00:29:59,400 Speaker 1: bound together for life, because what's the difference. And but 594 00:29:59,480 --> 00:30:01,640 Speaker 1: you're going to to get married and have a legal document? Yeah, 595 00:30:01,720 --> 00:30:03,320 Speaker 1: I mean I don't I don't know what I mean 596 00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:07,520 Speaker 1: legal document by getting married. Yes, like in our marriage. Um, 597 00:30:07,560 --> 00:30:09,480 Speaker 1: you know, one thing he told me that actually stuck 598 00:30:09,480 --> 00:30:12,320 Speaker 1: out and stuck with me was he he had some 599 00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:14,920 Speaker 1: friends who are no longer together anymore, but you know 600 00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:18,120 Speaker 1: citing you know, hey, like I kicked your ass in 601 00:30:18,120 --> 00:30:21,160 Speaker 1: the prenup. It's like after they got married, and it's like, 602 00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:24,200 Speaker 1: what like that's not that type of competitiveness and that 603 00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:28,320 Speaker 1: type of mindset is not healthy in a relationship. Yeah, 604 00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:31,400 Speaker 1: it sometimes happens with people's parents. They are the ones 605 00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:33,400 Speaker 1: with money they've left the kids money that is going 606 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:35,520 Speaker 1: to then make money and they get worried and that 607 00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:38,840 Speaker 1: gets some poison injected. I understand why Andy asked, did 608 00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,800 Speaker 1: I understand your answer? I understand all of it. I 609 00:30:41,880 --> 00:30:43,400 Speaker 1: just like it's a good it's a good topic, and 610 00:30:43,440 --> 00:30:47,160 Speaker 1: it's good for people to know, um, to know, because 611 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:49,200 Speaker 1: you never know what can happen. UM. But I mean, 612 00:30:49,240 --> 00:30:50,880 Speaker 1: I don't mean that in a negative way at all. 613 00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 1: I mean, I'm happy for you and congratulations. I just 614 00:30:53,240 --> 00:30:55,479 Speaker 1: like the topic because it's you know, we've seen all 615 00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:58,560 Speaker 1: sides of it. Um. What about having what about two 616 00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:01,360 Speaker 1: bachelorettes at the same time? What are your thoughts on that? 617 00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:07,200 Speaker 1: My thoughts on it are very candidly. Uh, they have 618 00:31:07,320 --> 00:31:10,000 Speaker 1: to do something different with the show. I mean that 619 00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:12,440 Speaker 1: the ratings aren't what they used to be, and they 620 00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:15,040 Speaker 1: have to keep leveling up. And you can only level 621 00:31:15,080 --> 00:31:16,880 Speaker 1: up on the drama so much that now you have 622 00:31:16,920 --> 00:31:18,760 Speaker 1: to raise the stakes, and by raising the stakes, you 623 00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,200 Speaker 1: have to bring in another bachelor at In my opinion, 624 00:31:21,320 --> 00:31:23,719 Speaker 1: that's what they're doing here. So who knows how it's 625 00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:25,600 Speaker 1: gonna shake out. If it's going to change the format 626 00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:28,480 Speaker 1: of the show, it's gonna definitely make it juicier and 627 00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:30,920 Speaker 1: have more drama to it. Whatever however they're going to 628 00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:33,480 Speaker 1: spin it. But that's the nature of reality TV. If 629 00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,760 Speaker 1: you if you want to keep leveling up and keep 630 00:31:36,480 --> 00:31:39,280 Speaker 1: your ratings up, you have to keep doing more extreme things. 631 00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:42,360 Speaker 1: So that's my take on that. And at the same time, 632 00:31:42,800 --> 00:31:44,880 Speaker 1: I hope they both get what they want out of this, 633 00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:47,680 Speaker 1: both the girls. I think they seem great. Yeah, And 634 00:31:47,720 --> 00:31:52,360 Speaker 1: I listen, when I was back on reality television, the 635 00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:55,360 Speaker 1: things to do, the things that got ratings were just 636 00:31:55,400 --> 00:31:59,000 Speaker 1: more nuanced in conversation. Later on, people were throwing prosthetic 637 00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:01,960 Speaker 1: legs and flip being tables and ripping hair out. Like 638 00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:05,160 Speaker 1: you know, it gets to be a little it gets 639 00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:08,160 Speaker 1: to be a little much. You can't. It's like the 640 00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:10,040 Speaker 1: It's like, what is it You have more of a thresh, 641 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:11,880 Speaker 1: you have more of a What is it when you 642 00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:14,560 Speaker 1: can take more? What is it called? You keep drinking? 643 00:32:14,600 --> 00:32:19,480 Speaker 1: Your your tolerance? Thank you? Right the top? We all 644 00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:22,400 Speaker 1: we've seen, we've seen we've get ripped out, we've seen 645 00:32:22,440 --> 00:32:24,040 Speaker 1: a table flip, we've seen a light what what do 646 00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,280 Speaker 1: you have to kill somebody? You have to kill somebody 647 00:32:26,320 --> 00:32:28,080 Speaker 1: on television. You have to kill somebody or we're not 648 00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:32,360 Speaker 1: gonna watch It's yeah, the the and there's so many shows. Um, 649 00:32:32,560 --> 00:32:34,360 Speaker 1: do you feel like you when you talk to your 650 00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:38,240 Speaker 1: producing partners and your publicist in your in your own mind, 651 00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,040 Speaker 1: do you feel like you want to do a rinse? 652 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:43,120 Speaker 1: Like you're known as that, your your your your legacy 653 00:32:43,200 --> 00:32:45,720 Speaker 1: is the Bachelor. You're on the Bachelor. You're the bachelor 654 00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:47,280 Speaker 1: that was gay that came out that people don't know 655 00:32:47,320 --> 00:32:49,280 Speaker 1: your name, they know that guy, that football player that 656 00:32:49,320 --> 00:32:51,440 Speaker 1: was gay that came out. Do you try to do 657 00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:53,560 Speaker 1: the rints because you want this? You have all these 658 00:32:53,600 --> 00:32:57,440 Speaker 1: amazing projects and you're you know, because for me, it's 659 00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:59,360 Speaker 1: the rints. I want to do the rints. I don't 660 00:32:59,400 --> 00:33:01,320 Speaker 1: want to be the how swife like I want the rent. 661 00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:03,440 Speaker 1: So you're working on the rents and is the rents working? 662 00:33:04,800 --> 00:33:06,280 Speaker 1: I am working on the rents and I don't think 663 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:10,040 Speaker 1: the rent is working because anytime, anytime people, I mean, look, 664 00:33:10,280 --> 00:33:13,040 Speaker 1: i am the Bachelor will always be on my resume 665 00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:15,400 Speaker 1: and I'm happy to keep it there. Um, I don't 666 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:19,280 Speaker 1: watch the show anymore. I feel like I have elevated 667 00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:21,760 Speaker 1: as far as like my creativity in my process, what 668 00:33:21,880 --> 00:33:25,080 Speaker 1: I want to bring to the entertainment world is no 669 00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:31,640 Speaker 1: longer in the Bachelor realm um, but any true yeah, yeah, 670 00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:34,360 Speaker 1: you're lying, you're making up a lie. Yeah yeah. And 671 00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:36,120 Speaker 1: anytime I talk about it, it's a headline because I 672 00:33:36,120 --> 00:33:38,000 Speaker 1: don't talk about it that often. So then all of 673 00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:40,400 Speaker 1: a sudden, when I do say Bachelor, everybody's on pins 674 00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,640 Speaker 1: and needles to hear what I have to say. Because 675 00:33:43,000 --> 00:33:46,280 Speaker 1: I'm not sorry. I'm not in the Oh, you're fine. Um, 676 00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:48,400 Speaker 1: it's it's part of doing the press, the press tour. 677 00:33:48,440 --> 00:33:51,080 Speaker 1: But anyway, I'm still serving that franchise because they're getting 678 00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:54,160 Speaker 1: their impressions in their media and their links from from 679 00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:56,680 Speaker 1: me talking about it. But um, look, it gave me 680 00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:59,920 Speaker 1: my start, right um. And I think it doesn't get 681 00:34:00,040 --> 00:34:03,160 Speaker 1: said because they like to play into their their bubble 682 00:34:03,320 --> 00:34:05,440 Speaker 1: and their fairy tale. But at the end of the day, 683 00:34:05,480 --> 00:34:07,920 Speaker 1: they made millions off me, and I made when I 684 00:34:07,960 --> 00:34:11,200 Speaker 1: made off of them, and I had the start of 685 00:34:11,200 --> 00:34:14,040 Speaker 1: a career and they had a good product. They had 686 00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:17,279 Speaker 1: a great season with me. So I sort of thank 687 00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:19,560 Speaker 1: you for for doing this for me. You can thank 688 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:22,040 Speaker 1: me for doing that for you. It's a business and 689 00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:24,520 Speaker 1: let me do my thing now, stop like you don't 690 00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:27,000 Speaker 1: have to keep coming at me claiming you built me 691 00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:30,200 Speaker 1: and you made me, like I'll always say that, you know, um, 692 00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:32,439 Speaker 1: but I want to go do something different, like let 693 00:34:32,440 --> 00:34:34,200 Speaker 1: me let me go have a Netflix show and let 694 00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:36,800 Speaker 1: me go work with CBS, let me go work with Fox, 695 00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:38,759 Speaker 1: like I have other projects that I really want to 696 00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:42,560 Speaker 1: get out there and do. Um. And I I can, 697 00:34:42,760 --> 00:34:45,359 Speaker 1: you know, say thank you for my start? Yeah? Right, 698 00:34:45,480 --> 00:34:48,040 Speaker 1: likewise I get I could. I couldn't get it more 699 00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:52,759 Speaker 1: about that seven thou my first season of Housewives, So 700 00:34:53,320 --> 00:34:56,239 Speaker 1: you know, I mean yeah, yeah, I mean you make 701 00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:58,520 Speaker 1: a fraction of what the network truly breaks in from 702 00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:00,239 Speaker 1: those shows. And then you like look around and you're 703 00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:02,279 Speaker 1: like really and you're and all of a sudden, you're 704 00:35:02,320 --> 00:35:03,640 Speaker 1: onto the next one. You're not even gonna look at 705 00:35:03,680 --> 00:35:05,640 Speaker 1: my direction anymore. So it was a wake up call. 706 00:35:05,719 --> 00:35:20,080 Speaker 1: But that's what this industry is. Your rose and your 707 00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:26,560 Speaker 1: thorn of your career. My rose would be having the 708 00:35:26,640 --> 00:35:29,480 Speaker 1: courage to go get talking to me, talking to you today, 709 00:35:30,040 --> 00:35:34,440 Speaker 1: but as a career asking I would say, my rose 710 00:35:34,600 --> 00:35:36,960 Speaker 1: is asking for help. I was at an all time 711 00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:39,000 Speaker 1: low in my in my life. I didn't know where 712 00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:40,640 Speaker 1: to turn. I didn't know what to do, and I 713 00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:44,120 Speaker 1: finally got help, and now having a therapist and going 714 00:35:44,160 --> 00:35:46,640 Speaker 1: to therapy was the best thing in my life because 715 00:35:46,920 --> 00:35:51,360 Speaker 1: it's allowed me this piece. It's allowed me my sanity 716 00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:54,360 Speaker 1: back in my creativity and so many things. So that 717 00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:58,719 Speaker 1: would be my rose, and then my thorn would be 718 00:36:00,239 --> 00:36:04,480 Speaker 1: probably just some of the things my way of venting, 719 00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:07,680 Speaker 1: in my way of coming up after Like when I 720 00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:10,000 Speaker 1: was trying to cleanse myself of the Bachelor, I think 721 00:36:10,360 --> 00:36:13,920 Speaker 1: just having some aggressive thoughts and sort of not putting 722 00:36:14,040 --> 00:36:17,040 Speaker 1: my thoughts together in a well articulated way to attack 723 00:36:17,080 --> 00:36:20,800 Speaker 1: the franchise. I would say, I'm not proud of those moments. 724 00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,480 Speaker 1: While I could have handled things a lot better, Um, 725 00:36:23,560 --> 00:36:25,880 Speaker 1: I just think there was a lot of frustrations and 726 00:36:26,280 --> 00:36:28,560 Speaker 1: pent up aggression that I took out on them in 727 00:36:28,560 --> 00:36:31,480 Speaker 1: an unfair way, like biting the hand that feed you, 728 00:36:31,719 --> 00:36:34,200 Speaker 1: or just the way that not thinking before you speak. 729 00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:36,040 Speaker 1: It was. It was a mix of both of like 730 00:36:36,200 --> 00:36:38,640 Speaker 1: not thinking before I speak, but also like look I 731 00:36:39,320 --> 00:36:41,760 Speaker 1: should have said earlier on like thank you for giving 732 00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:43,520 Speaker 1: me my start, but like respectfully, I want to go 733 00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,839 Speaker 1: in a different direction here, like this is not you know, 734 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:48,239 Speaker 1: in this business world. It's not healthy for me to 735 00:36:48,239 --> 00:36:50,759 Speaker 1: stay in business with you. Um. I wish I would 736 00:36:50,800 --> 00:36:53,399 Speaker 1: have had the maturity to handle a lot of things 737 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,080 Speaker 1: in my life like that a little bit better. And 738 00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:59,000 Speaker 1: do you miss football? I miss football a lot, and 739 00:36:59,040 --> 00:37:02,719 Speaker 1: I I'm miss it one because obviously it's the only 740 00:37:02,760 --> 00:37:07,560 Speaker 1: sport you can go hit another man and not have consequences. 741 00:37:07,760 --> 00:37:11,200 Speaker 1: But also, um, the community, the camaraderie, the melting pot 742 00:37:11,239 --> 00:37:13,439 Speaker 1: of cultures that I got to experience as a kid 743 00:37:13,520 --> 00:37:16,960 Speaker 1: from central Illinois farmtown who did not have a lot 744 00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:19,520 Speaker 1: of diversity in this town. To go have a locker 745 00:37:19,600 --> 00:37:21,279 Speaker 1: next to somebody who grew up in the hood and 746 00:37:21,360 --> 00:37:24,680 Speaker 1: poor and did not know, you know, when his next 747 00:37:24,680 --> 00:37:26,239 Speaker 1: meal was going to be on the table, To have 748 00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:30,080 Speaker 1: that type of conversation, that type of camaraderie and brotherhood 749 00:37:30,440 --> 00:37:32,320 Speaker 1: was something that is going to be with me forever. 750 00:37:32,480 --> 00:37:34,799 Speaker 1: So I missed the culture. I missed the melting pot 751 00:37:34,840 --> 00:37:38,680 Speaker 1: of locker rooms. Wow, that's nice. And what about Brady 752 00:37:38,719 --> 00:37:41,760 Speaker 1: gone back? What do you think I had a feeling, 753 00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:45,160 Speaker 1: you know, when his and when his retirement first got 754 00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:46,880 Speaker 1: leaked and it didn't come from him and somebody else, 755 00:37:46,960 --> 00:37:48,920 Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, he's he's not going to retire 756 00:37:48,960 --> 00:37:50,320 Speaker 1: because he doesn't want to go out like this. He 757 00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:52,200 Speaker 1: wants to be in control of his own destiny. So 758 00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:55,680 Speaker 1: I always knew there was something a little fishy. Um. Look, 759 00:37:55,719 --> 00:38:01,400 Speaker 1: that man's a legend, um and he's he's undeniably the greatest. 760 00:38:01,440 --> 00:38:05,240 Speaker 1: So I'm excited to see what he's got. Yep, so interesting. Wow, 761 00:38:05,680 --> 00:38:07,920 Speaker 1: clear eyes, full heart, can't lose. To bring back the 762 00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:11,160 Speaker 1: beginning of the conversation, Well, it was a wonderful conversation. 763 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:13,400 Speaker 1: It's so nice to have met you. Well, it's so 764 00:38:13,480 --> 00:38:16,080 Speaker 1: nice to meet you too. And Um, I'm proud of 765 00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:18,879 Speaker 1: your cleanse. You've done an amazing job and obviously you're 766 00:38:19,080 --> 00:38:22,120 Speaker 1: your mobile in so many different ways. And I respect 767 00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:23,719 Speaker 1: and look up to you in that in that way, 768 00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:25,680 Speaker 1: and I'm going to try to take that and apply 769 00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:28,680 Speaker 1: it towards my life and my cleans too. Yeah, stick 770 00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:31,600 Speaker 1: to the cleanse, because everything you say and do, and 771 00:38:31,640 --> 00:38:33,719 Speaker 1: you'll want to be pulled back into certain things even 772 00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:37,080 Speaker 1: if they're not that you gotta stick to the cleanse. 773 00:38:37,160 --> 00:38:40,560 Speaker 1: You gotta. It's just it's it's a discipline. Honestly, that's 774 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:42,560 Speaker 1: not Why would I do that, even if it makes 775 00:38:42,560 --> 00:38:44,880 Speaker 1: me money. It's pulling me back to that. It is 776 00:38:44,960 --> 00:38:48,040 Speaker 1: really a rinse. And it's interesting because when I was 777 00:38:48,040 --> 00:38:50,160 Speaker 1: talking about the Kim Kardashian comment about you better get 778 00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:52,200 Speaker 1: off your rest and work, and it made people upset. 779 00:38:53,239 --> 00:38:56,240 Speaker 1: It brought there it in one moment, took the cleanse 780 00:38:56,280 --> 00:38:57,920 Speaker 1: away and they went back, Oh wait, how did she 781 00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:00,799 Speaker 1: get started? Because little thing is that you do or 782 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:05,160 Speaker 1: say on Glen Glenn. So that's just my advice to you. Well, 783 00:39:05,239 --> 00:39:08,200 Speaker 1: I think I saw on Andy Cohen to you, Um, 784 00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:10,640 Speaker 1: you made a big donation to you Ukraine, did you not? 785 00:39:11,200 --> 00:39:14,480 Speaker 1: I've raised, We've done, yes, made, I've made a big donation, 786 00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:17,480 Speaker 1: but also we've raised. It will end up being probably 787 00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,520 Speaker 1: like a hundred and twenty million dollar effort. Now we 788 00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:23,040 Speaker 1: we've raised like a million dollars a day, but we're sending. Uh, 789 00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:25,680 Speaker 1: it's already fifty million dollars in aids, so it's becoming 790 00:39:25,719 --> 00:39:28,719 Speaker 1: an astronomical effort at this time. It's really big. So 791 00:39:28,760 --> 00:39:30,799 Speaker 1: it's good. Well, I want to give you a rose 792 00:39:30,840 --> 00:39:32,920 Speaker 1: for that and say thank you on behalf of a 793 00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:36,040 Speaker 1: lot of Americans in the world in general. So thank 794 00:39:36,040 --> 00:39:39,399 Speaker 1: you for your saying I appreciate it. Thank you so much. 795 00:39:39,440 --> 00:39:41,640 Speaker 1: All Right, we'll have a wonderful day. And congratulations on 796 00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:46,880 Speaker 1: your engagement. Thank you so much. God. Colton is so 797 00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:50,800 Speaker 1: so nice and sweet and cute and charming and fun 798 00:39:51,400 --> 00:39:56,640 Speaker 1: and driven at a young age. What a crazy story, um, 799 00:39:56,680 --> 00:39:59,520 Speaker 1: and I just love hearing about him finding his truth 800 00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:02,200 Speaker 1: and I so I think it's interesting. He said, so 801 00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:04,799 Speaker 1: many other people are struggling with finding their truth. But 802 00:40:04,920 --> 00:40:07,799 Speaker 1: I thought that was a really interesting conversation. God, I 803 00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:11,520 Speaker 1: never ever ever stopped loving the variety of people and 804 00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:14,839 Speaker 1: conversations that I have here. I learned something. I learned 805 00:40:14,880 --> 00:40:17,759 Speaker 1: so many things every day, so that was really wonderful. 806 00:40:18,120 --> 00:40:21,000 Speaker 1: Remember to rate, review and subscribe, and I appreciate you listening. 807 00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:25,400 Speaker 1: Just Be is hosted by me Bethany Frankel. Just Be 808 00:40:25,520 --> 00:40:28,560 Speaker 1: as a production of Be Real Productions, I Heart Radio 809 00:40:28,640 --> 00:40:33,000 Speaker 1: and Blue Duct Media. Are EPs are Morgan Levois, Antonio Enriquez, 810 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:35,359 Speaker 1: and Kara hit To catch more moments from the show, 811 00:40:35,480 --> 00:40:46,560 Speaker 1: follow us on Instagram and Just Be with Bethany