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Speaker 1: Am I the a hole for telling my mother in

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Speaker 1: law that she's not going to be in the room

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Speaker 1: when I give birth by mom? This comes from STARTUS

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Speaker 1: eighteen thirty nine, and they say before I began, I

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Speaker 1: need to clarify that I'm a trans man. I was

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Speaker 1: a fab but transitioned about five years ago, a fab

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Speaker 1: assigned female at birth, I thirty male AM thirty eight

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Speaker 1: weeks pregnant with mine and my husband James's thirty three

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Speaker 1: male first child. We had talked about children before I transitioned,

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Speaker 1: and we both said we wanted them. After I transitioned,

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Speaker 1: he asked me if I would be okay with carrying

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Speaker 1: our child, and if I'm not, we would look into

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Speaker 1: other options. I told him I still wanted to carry

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Speaker 1: our child, as I always wanted to experience it. I

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Speaker 1: haven't started on tea or gotten surgery because I wanted

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Speaker 1: to wait until I had kids, and I didn't mind

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Speaker 1: waiting either. I feel somewhat okay in my body, and

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Speaker 1: whenever I do feel dysphoric, my husband is always there

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Speaker 1: to help me.

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Speaker 2: Poor baby.

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Speaker 1: So sounds like OHP presents as a man but han't

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Speaker 1: done any surgery or any or any medication.

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Speaker 2: And op is like, I'm I'm okay with this. I

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Speaker 2: do want to be able to have my children and

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Speaker 2: I children and I can wait.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. When I transitioned, James was and still is very supportive. However,

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Speaker 1: his family did not take it well. They continue to

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Speaker 1: call me by my dead name, along with the wrong pronouns.

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Speaker 1: Whenever James or I correct them, they bring up the

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Speaker 1: fact that I don't have the right parts and I

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Speaker 1: don't look or sound like a man either. Boy. It

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Speaker 1: upset me at the start as I had been very

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Speaker 1: close with his family, but now I've gotten used to

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Speaker 1: it and do my best to ignore it. James, however,

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Speaker 1: can't get past it, and when someone says something, he

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Speaker 1: ends up arguing with them, which sounds like Opie's husband

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Speaker 1: is kind of going to bat which is good, which

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Speaker 1: is good, which is good. When we told his family

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Speaker 1: that I was pregnant, they were all excited as this

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Speaker 1: was the first baby born into the family. My mother

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Speaker 1: in law especially was very excited and began telling me

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Speaker 1: about different things I need to do to keep the

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Speaker 1: baby healthy. As the months passed, though, I kept hearing

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Speaker 1: comments about me being a mom, even though I made

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Speaker 1: it clear that I want the baby to call me

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Speaker 1: Papa or dad. I've been told that I can't have

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Speaker 1: a silly surgery to remove my breast because I need

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Speaker 1: them to feed my baby. Also, they're glad I came

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Speaker 1: to my senses about pretending to be a man. We

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Speaker 1: found out we were having a little boy, and almost

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Speaker 1: instant I don't think we've ever read a story like that.

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Speaker 2: This is yeah, this is a verse. This is an

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Speaker 2: incredibly unique story. This is a very unique story.

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Speaker 1: We found out we were having a little boy, and

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Speaker 1: almost instantly we picked a name for him. We both

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Speaker 1: love anything to do with space, and we wanted our

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Speaker 1: first born to have a space related name, so we

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Speaker 1: named it after Elon.

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Speaker 2: Muskin asylm omnium.

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Speaker 1: So we decided that our little boy would be called Leo,

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Speaker 1: after the constellation. My mother in law wasn't happy with

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Speaker 1: that name and started calling him Isaac. Bro have your

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Speaker 1: own kid, then do it.

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Speaker 2: Leo's cool name. It all works.

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Speaker 1: James and I corrected her numerous times, telling her that

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Speaker 1: it wasn't our son's name, but she wouldn't listen.

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Speaker 2: I feel like this is pettiness.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I see, this is as mother love. Yeah, ye,

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Speaker 1: she got a blanket, a few onesie's and a teddy

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Speaker 1: bear with the name Isaac engraved on them. She told

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Speaker 1: us that when we see him, we'll see that she

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Speaker 1: was right and that will name of Isaac. Dude, how

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Speaker 1: is this mother in law so daft?

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Speaker 2: Truly?

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Speaker 1: Imagine imagine you're like, oh, what's your little boy's name?

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Speaker 1: And it's like, oh, yeah, this is Leo. Nah doesn't

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Speaker 1: look like Leo. No, looks more like an Isaac.

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Speaker 2: Let's let's name is Isaac. I got this president that

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Speaker 2: reaffirms that, hey, give me his pirth certificate. Let me

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Speaker 2: let me just scratch that out, and it's it's this

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Speaker 2: to me is just again a further like subconscious e

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Speaker 2: petty dig.

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Speaker 1: And I feel like it's in an effort to maintain

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Speaker 1: control of the relationship that it seems like mother in

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Speaker 1: law has not come to terms with.

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Speaker 2: Yeah and continue to push the disapproval of.

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Speaker 1: We decided to do a hospital birth, and my mother

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Speaker 1: in law demanded that she be in the room so

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Speaker 1: she could see her first grandchild being born. Neither James

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Speaker 1: or I want her there. We wanted to be a

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Speaker 1: special moment with just the two of us. She would

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Speaker 1: not take no for an answer. Last week, we were

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Speaker 1: at their house for dinner and she began bragging to

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Speaker 1: the rest of the family that she would be there

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Speaker 1: when I had a baby. James snapped and told her

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Speaker 1: she wasn't going to be there, especially with how she

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Speaker 1: treated me over the past few years with my transition.

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Speaker 1: She got upset and yelled at him about being an

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Speaker 1: important moment for her, but.

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Speaker 2: How about an important moment for the parents.

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Speaker 1: But James wasn't having it and they both got into

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Speaker 1: a pretty heated argument. I had enough and told her

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Speaker 1: to f off and take no for an answer, or

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Speaker 1: she wasn't going to see her grandson ever again. She

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Speaker 1: started crying and I received multiple players from the rest

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Speaker 1: of the family. James and I left and neither of

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Speaker 1: us spoke during the ride home, But when he got

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Speaker 1: home he said he was sorry for how he acted

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Speaker 1: and he didn't mean to upset me. I told him

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Speaker 1: it wasn't his fault and he had every right to

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Speaker 1: say something. We spent the night cuddle in bed, watching

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Speaker 1: TV and feeling our son kick.

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Speaker 2: Dude, James is a ride or die? Yeah, Dude, James

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Speaker 2: a ride or die? James is sick he's out here.

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Speaker 1: In the last few days, I've received numerous messages from

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Speaker 1: people telling me that I shouldn't have threatened my mother

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Speaker 1: in law. Threatened.

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Speaker 3: What do you like not seeing you will never see?

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Speaker 1: Well, I mean if you keep acting crazy and calling

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Speaker 1: my son not by their name, then yeah, what do

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Speaker 1: you expect?

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Speaker 2: Honestly, Honestly, it's it's like it's getting to a point

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Speaker 2: where if they're just going to constantly harass you for

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Speaker 2: the rest of times, when do you go no contact? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: that to me is I'm waiting to kind of see

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Speaker 2: where that.

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Speaker 1: And like, I don't I also don't feel it was

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Speaker 1: an idle threat. It was like stop, stop doing this,

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Speaker 1: or we won't want to be part of your life.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was more of like I mean, yeah, I

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Speaker 2: guess it was a threat to take something away, but

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Speaker 2: it's like a but.

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Speaker 1: It's not yet.

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Speaker 2: A threat is the wrong one.

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Speaker 1: When I heard the word threat, I'm like, wait, did

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Speaker 1: did ope like say I'm going to like push you

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Speaker 1: into a ditch or.

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Speaker 2: Something I'm going to give you like what we're talking about.

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Speaker 1: They told me I shouldn't have threatened my mother in

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Speaker 1: law and I had no right to do that. And

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Speaker 1: that I should apologize. I've even gotten messages from some

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Speaker 1: of our friends who heard the story from James's sisters.

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Speaker 1: I replied, saying that she needed to apologize for overstepping

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Speaker 1: and not listening to a word James or I had said.

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Speaker 1: The responses to that weren't kind, and I haven't replied.

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Speaker 1: I keep being bombarded with messages and now James is

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Speaker 1: as well. So did we go too far? Should we

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Speaker 1: apologize for how we handle the situation? James says no,

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Speaker 1: but I don't know what to do. And there is

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Speaker 1: a pretty juicy update. But everyone in the comments, what

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Speaker 1: do you think Opie should do? John, what do you think.

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Speaker 2: They've been harassing Ope since before the baby. She's now

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Speaker 2: using the stupid name thing as an excuse to harass

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Speaker 2: them about the baby. Like at the end of the day,

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Speaker 2: like these are the parents of the child and you're

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Speaker 2: not entitled to anything. Yeah, really, what you.

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Speaker 1: Should be doing is you should be making their lives easier, easier, easier,

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Speaker 1: and you have only caused stress and destruction.

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Speaker 2: And like, yes, there is like generally this default of

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Speaker 2: like oh the like if your family you get to,

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Speaker 2: you know, see the child and be involved in active

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Speaker 2: in their lives. But if you're not an a hole though,

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Speaker 2: if you're not an a hole, which absolutely in all

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Speaker 2: of these instances the mother in law has been so

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Speaker 2: like been absolutely absolutely not. They deserve to have their

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Speaker 2: peace on the most stressful day, probably of both of them,

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Speaker 2: without a doubt.

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Speaker 1: But John, but Sam, there is a juicy, thick update.

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Speaker 1: I want to start off by saying thank you for

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Speaker 1: the support. It really means a lot. Okay, So James

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Speaker 1: went over to his parents a couple of days after

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Speaker 1: my post to pick some things up. I don't know

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Speaker 1: what they talked about, but when he came home, he

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Speaker 1: was pissed and told me that we were never going

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Speaker 1: to see them again. Oh. I didn't argue with him,

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Speaker 1: but later that night I asked what had happened, and

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Speaker 1: all he said was I can't believe those people are

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Speaker 1: related to me. I didn't ask anything else and just

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Speaker 1: hugged him tightly. Wow, which I feel like is also

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Speaker 1: the appropriate response. Like sometimes like you don't go into

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Speaker 1: the details of someone who had just gone over something

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Speaker 1: super emotional, like the part like op is just like

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Speaker 1: I don't need to know, I just need to know.

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Speaker 1: I need to hold you, which is kind of fire.

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Speaker 2: Damn that hit me. That hit me.

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Speaker 1: A few days later, I went into labor James and

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Speaker 1: I didn't tell anyone, and we spent the next thirty

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Speaker 1: four hours together and when our beautiful baby boy made

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Speaker 1: his appearance, it was just us, just like we wanted

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Speaker 1: and it was amazing.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: I was able to go home two days after I

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Speaker 1: gave birth. And when we arrived home, we found James's

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Speaker 1: family in our living room. Come on, we never gave

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Speaker 1: any of them a Keith house. The only people to

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Speaker 1: have keys are me and James.

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Speaker 2: So the family broke in. James was fury.

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Speaker 1: Imagine just having a baby and you have to deal

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Speaker 1: with burglars.

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Speaker 2: You're like, You're like, I want to go home inside.

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Speaker 2: They've been in there for thirty four hours.

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Speaker 1: To go home and relax. It's like, hey, even if

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Speaker 1: these people were angels and had only been nice, imagine

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Speaker 1: the craziest our deal so many hours in labor, tears,

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Speaker 1: shed emotional roller coaster, and you come home home and

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Speaker 1: you come home just wanted to relax, and then just

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Speaker 1: all of your family just.

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Speaker 2: Be like, I gotta entertain these freaking fools. Yeah, get

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Speaker 2: out of nice.

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Speaker 1: Get out, and the fact that these people are horrible

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Speaker 1: is it makes it even more stressed. Because James was

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Speaker 1: furious and started telling them to leave, but they refused

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Speaker 1: to go. Not only do you have burglars, you got squattered. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they tried to see Leo, which I guess they're calling Isaac,

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Speaker 1: but James pulled the cover on the baby carrier down,

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Speaker 1: which blocked their view of him. You don't even get

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Speaker 1: to see him, right.

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Speaker 2: They started galling, demanding that we showed them.

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Speaker 3: Leo.

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Speaker 1: Bro, it's not the Snyder cut. Like, you can't just

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Speaker 1: be like, release Leo, let us see it.

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Speaker 2: I can't do it.

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Speaker 1: You know about the Snyder cut. Oh, go, you know

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Speaker 1: about the Snyder cut. Snyder James's mom called Leo Isaac

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Speaker 1: again and said it was right to see him as

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Speaker 1: his grandmother. James handed the carry to me and told

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Speaker 1: me to go to the bedroom with Leo. I doesn't

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Speaker 1: have tate and left the room. I heard shouting coming

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Speaker 1: from both James and his family. James threatened them by

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Speaker 1: saying he'd call the cops if they didn't go, and

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Speaker 1: that got them shut up. About fifteen minutes later, I

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Speaker 1: heard the front door open and close and James came upstairs.

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Speaker 1: When he stepped into the bedroom, he just broke down.

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Speaker 1: He collapsed onto the ground and sobbed. My heart broke

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Speaker 1: and I hurried over to him and held him in

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Speaker 1: my arms. He kept apologizing to me over and over,

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Speaker 1: and when I said it was okay and we figured

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Speaker 1: something out, he just kept saying, no, apologizing again.

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Speaker 2: What's up, James, Something's going on. Some was about to

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Speaker 2: go very wrong.

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Speaker 1: When he calmed himself down, he told me he just

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Speaker 1: wanted his family to be happy for him, to love him,

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Speaker 1: and to respect him. He kept thinking of what he

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Speaker 1: did wrong to make them feel this way, and the

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Speaker 1: longer he did that, he began to get upset again.

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Speaker 1: I stopped him, and I firmly told him he didn't

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Speaker 1: need them, that his family was right here, that me

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Speaker 1: and Leo aren't going anywhere and will always love him.

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Speaker 1: We spent the rest of the day in bed talking

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Speaker 1: about what to do with Leo. Between us. Since that day,

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Speaker 1: we've been in contact with the police and they've been

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Speaker 1: so helpful and kind about our situation. This is actually

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Speaker 1: really cute, right. It's been hard on James, but he

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Speaker 1: knows it's best for us. To not contact them anymore.

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Speaker 1: We hope this will be done soon and we can

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Speaker 1: put it behind us and focus on the future. But

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Speaker 1: for now, we're enjoying being family of three and doting

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Speaker 1: on our little boy every chance we get. Wow, if

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Speaker 1: the crucible of a terrible family doesn't bring someone together,

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Speaker 1: if that ain't the cutest thing, oh, sometimes a poopy family,

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Speaker 1: you know what they serve to do bring it closer

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Speaker 1: together truly and to feel like what happened, that's what's

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Speaker 1: happened here.

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Speaker 2: You know, when the rubber meets the road, you learn

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Speaker 2: who your real real family is. And uh, I think

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Speaker 2: literally all they did is is harass and demand no love,

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Speaker 2: no support. So and dude, James Road so hard for

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Speaker 2: op And like the moment when James broke down is

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Speaker 2: like I am just, I'm just I just want my

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Speaker 2: family to love me.

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Speaker 1: Don't we all?

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Speaker 2: Dude?

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Speaker 1: It's just such like a I mean, it's just a

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Speaker 1: human thing. It's a human thing. We just want our

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Speaker 1: families to love them.

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Speaker 2: It seems like they've got this beautiful little family unit.

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Speaker 2: And I think I think they got all the support

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Speaker 2: and love they need right there.

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Speaker 1: They got they got like you can hear the love.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you can hear the love beautiful and that

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Speaker 1: is amazing.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 1: H But yeah, what do you think? How do you think? Ope?

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Speaker 1: Handle it? What do you think of the mother in law?

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Speaker 2: Would you have left earlier? I think what, like you

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Speaker 2: know what I mean?

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Speaker 1: Or sorry?

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Speaker 2: Would you have on no contact earlier?

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Speaker 1: Probably? Or I mean, uh no, I think this is that.

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Speaker 1: I think this is the exact grate breaking point. I

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Speaker 1: probably would have chosen. Yeah, yeah, because everything else is

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Speaker 1: like kind of crazy and wild. But you're trying to

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Speaker 1: give them, try to get them a chance. Like you know,

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Speaker 1: they're old people, they maybe have like backwards beliefs and

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Speaker 1: are I'm just excited about the baby, but this is like,

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Speaker 1: oh no, this is this is a line that has

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Speaker 1: been stepped and they need to be putting time out

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Speaker 1: for at least a while.

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Speaker 2: But it ended up bringing uh op's little family unit

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Speaker 2: close closer together?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but you know what brings our family unit closer together?

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Speaker 2: What is that same? When do you subscribe? Oh my god,

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00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:44,800
Speaker 2: because part of the family op dead, or we'll show.

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Speaker 1: Up to your house after your first born is born

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00:14:47,960 --> 00:14:50,960
Speaker 1: and say why haven't you subscribe?

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna look like this. Why haven't you subscribed? What

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Speaker 2: are you doing? The bunder?

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Speaker 1: I agree, we wouldn't have to do this if you

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Speaker 1: just subscribed this from happening right now. Yeah, you have

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Speaker 1: the power. We have the power. But you know what

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Speaker 1: we have the power to do? What read this next story?

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Speaker 2: Boom. By the way, I set you up for that,

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Speaker 2: and you perfectly took it. It was just a beautiful allue.

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Speaker 2: Would I be the a whole for asking my brother

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Speaker 2: not to bring his husband to my wedding because of

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Speaker 2: my fiance's homophobic family. This comes from Ertzunu, who says,

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Speaker 2: my fiance and I are a few months into planning

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Speaker 2: our wedding and we are now deciding on who we

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Speaker 2: are inviting.

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Speaker 1: A very turbulent task.

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Speaker 2: Indeed, my fiance comes from a super conservative and religious background,

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Speaker 2: but has thankfully grown away from that, Otherwise I couldn't

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Speaker 2: marry her. Her parents, however, are still super conservative and

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Speaker 2: homophobic and delight in talking crap and all sorts of

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Speaker 2: horrible things about the LGBT community. Other members of her

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Speaker 2: family are like this as well, some more violently vocal

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Speaker 2: than others. Well, for our wedding, we have decided everyone

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Speaker 2: we invite can bring a plus one, subject to our approval.

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Speaker 2: Of course, I thought about it for a really long

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Speaker 2: time about my older brother and his husband. They've been

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Speaker 2: married for three years, and I don't want his husband

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Speaker 2: to attend with him.

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Speaker 1: Because of the conservative family.

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Speaker 2: It seems like this might be the case, Opie goes on, saying,

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Speaker 2: the drama if they attend together has the potential to

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Speaker 2: get out of hand, and that is something I don't

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Speaker 2: want to have to deal with on my wedding day.

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Speaker 2: My fiance also agrees with me on this.

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Speaker 1: That is a That is a pickle.

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Speaker 2: Dude, what what a rock?

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Speaker 3: Like?

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Speaker 1: You support their relationship, but you want your you want

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Speaker 1: all of your family to be there.

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Speaker 2: And it's also like your your this is your this

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Speaker 2: is your hopefully once in a lifetime and one day experience.

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Speaker 1: Planning a wedding is already so stressful.

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Speaker 2: And and you don't want potentially the brothers, the brother

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Speaker 2: and the brother's husband to be left out. Uh, feel

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Speaker 2: left out and on the flip side, go there and

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Speaker 2: maybe feel ostracized or like harassed or worse by the family. Dude,

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Speaker 2: I mean.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and like you couldn't not invite certain people, but

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Speaker 1: then that creates a whole there's there is Oh.

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Speaker 2: This is just let's just uninvite everyone from the wedding.

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Speaker 2: Let's yeah, let's really make us as simple as possible.

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Speaker 1: I mean, you could just not invite the people that

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Speaker 1: would cause a ruckus.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, to be to be honest, it's it's really making

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Speaker 2: me think more about the tight tight friends and family vibe.

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Speaker 1: Like it's like, if if someone would do that at

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Speaker 1: your wedding, do you want them there? But what if

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Speaker 1: it's like you're super close friends and family.

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Speaker 2: You know what the problem is.

364
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Speaker 1: It's it's or not friends, but maybe family.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, the problem is it's op's Beyonce's family, right. Let

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Speaker 2: me cripple check myself there. Uh yeah. My fiance comes

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Speaker 2: from a super conservative and a religious background.

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Speaker 1: And it's like, is that then basically you're not You're like, oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: your whole family can't come because they're all gonna be mean.

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Speaker 2: Like I feel like that's something. If it was O

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Speaker 2: Pece family, It's like, yeah, let's let's get them out

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Speaker 2: of here. I'm close with my brother. I don't care

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Speaker 2: about some distant cousins, uncles, whatever, are whole thing not

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Speaker 2: the vibe, but it is it is the Beyonce's family,

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Speaker 2: so low key the fiance. I mean, I think it's

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Speaker 2: fair to suggest it.

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Speaker 1: I'm really curious what all of you would do or

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Speaker 1: in the situation, yeah so, or if you've been in

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Speaker 1: this situation, yeah, I mean, like I guess the I

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Speaker 1: guess that brother could potentially just say, like, I'll just

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Speaker 1: bring my is it my boyfriend or husband.

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Speaker 2: It was the brother and the brother's husband, you.

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Speaker 1: Could say like, I'm gonna bring my husband as a

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Speaker 1: plus one friend.

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Speaker 2: I don't think it. I don't think it works. I

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Speaker 2: think because like once once it gets out like you're

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Speaker 2: you're you're bringing your husband at the end of the day.

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Speaker 1: Would people be like really that up in arms about this?

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Speaker 2: I honestly, I I honestly don't think so.

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Speaker 1: Do you think so?

391
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Speaker 3: I I think so?

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Speaker 2: But you but do you do you think someone would

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Speaker 2: not just like be maybe like quietly disgruntled or whatever

394
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Speaker 2: they like.

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Speaker 1: Someone would be actively disgruntled.

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Speaker 3: Depending on the family, some people like cannot get past it,

397
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Speaker 3: and it's it's pretty, it's pretty.

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Speaker 2: Here's here's what I think. I think. I'm we don't

399
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Speaker 2: know one hundred percent. Maybe we'll get more context. It

400
00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:46,760
Speaker 2: seems like maybe ope doesn't vibe with those family members. Sorry, uh,

401
00:19:46,760 --> 00:19:49,879
Speaker 2: Opie's fiance the bride doesn't vibe with those family members.

402
00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:52,840
Speaker 2: Sit down, you sit down with uh, with your fiance,

403
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Speaker 2: and you say, hey, what do you think about how

404
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Speaker 2: would you feel if we, uh did not invite those

405
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Speaker 2: those family members? Just simply asked, and.

406
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:06,919
Speaker 1: Maybe just like, if everyone is going to be on

407
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Speaker 1: the side of disgruntlement, just invite the people that will

408
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Speaker 1: be silently disgruntled rather than actively disgruntled, or.

409
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Speaker 2: Like, really sit down and like does does does do

410
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Speaker 2: you want to be? Like is it is it just

411
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Speaker 2: to oh I have to invite them kind of thing?

412
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Speaker 2: And and if so, maybe it's just like do we

413
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Speaker 2: really want those people at our wedding celebrating our life

414
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Speaker 2: or do we want my brother who we actually love

415
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Speaker 2: and rock with. Yeah, that's the first thing I would do.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's also his family.

417
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Speaker 2: It's not his family.

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Speaker 1: Family. It's like, yeah, that's what I'm saying, Like, it's

419
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Speaker 1: like it's also the fiances family.

420
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Speaker 2: So like, but do you okay? Like, but if you don't,

421
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Speaker 2: if you literally don't like your family, and it's an obligation.

422
00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:50,320
Speaker 2: Like again, you can't blame someone for wanting to.

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Speaker 1: I wonder does OP like their family, That's what I'm

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Speaker 1: that's the question.

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Speaker 2: We can't not invite her parents, Okay, good contacts and

426
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Speaker 2: know us his parents, and we can't not invite my brother.

427
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Speaker 2: So we feel our only option was to not invite

428
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Speaker 2: his husband. The brother's husband. Who knows what could be

429
00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:09,800
Speaker 2: said or done if he attends. And yeah, we are

430
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Speaker 2: being selfish, but it's our wedding. I'm not really sure

431
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Speaker 2: how he'll react though it took my brother a long

432
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Speaker 2: time to accept himself. Oh, I'm sure this won't feel good.

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Speaker 1: I hate this, This sucks.

434
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Speaker 2: Right, But at the same time, maybe his husband won't

435
00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:28,879
Speaker 2: want to attend anyways. I have nothing against my brother's husband.

436
00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:31,119
Speaker 2: He is a lovely man. But we are just trying

437
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Speaker 2: to have the day go smoothly. When we extended invitations out,

438
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Speaker 2: I think I'm going to my brother in person and

439
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 2: ask him not to bring his husband for all of

440
00:21:40,480 --> 00:21:44,000
Speaker 2: the reasons above. Would I be the a whole if

441
00:21:44,080 --> 00:21:47,920
Speaker 2: I asked him not to bring his husband. We have

442
00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:50,560
Speaker 2: a verdict from the post and we have relevant comments

443
00:21:50,560 --> 00:21:50,959
Speaker 2: coming up.

444
00:21:51,040 --> 00:21:54,120
Speaker 1: But I wonder if he or it.

445
00:21:54,040 --> 00:21:56,240
Speaker 3: Feels like you don't want to like fight for it. Yeah,

446
00:21:56,359 --> 00:21:59,080
Speaker 3: the only thing that's bothering you is what other people think,

447
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,480
Speaker 3: and you have the option to not let that influence you,

448
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:04,680
Speaker 3: and you can ask them to leave.

449
00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:08,840
Speaker 1: This decision to not invite your brother actually goes against

450
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 1: your values or your brother's boyfriend.

451
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:14,360
Speaker 2: Like it almost it almost feels like he's like, oh, like, oh,

452
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,520
Speaker 2: I disagree so much with the family on things they

453
00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:19,960
Speaker 2: say about the LGBT community. And then he's like, yeah,

454
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,359
Speaker 2: we don't want to deal with all of this.

455
00:22:22,600 --> 00:22:25,359
Speaker 1: It sounds like you don't rock with your It's like

456
00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:31,880
Speaker 1: if you truly if this was my sister, like I

457
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:36,760
Speaker 1: would I would like not even a question, make sure

458
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,280
Speaker 1: that my sister was was there with whoever she wanted

459
00:22:39,280 --> 00:22:41,520
Speaker 1: to be with. But then I think maybe my sister

460
00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,679
Speaker 1: would be like, oh, like I alays want to make

461
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:44,480
Speaker 1: your wedding easy.

462
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you know, Okay, here we go. I

463
00:22:47,119 --> 00:22:49,680
Speaker 2: think I got it. Uh, Yes, you're the a hole

464
00:22:50,080 --> 00:22:54,000
Speaker 2: because you didn't sit down and kind of have like

465
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:57,399
Speaker 2: a heart to heart first and kind of try to

466
00:22:57,440 --> 00:23:00,159
Speaker 2: figure out talk to the brother, like like like what

467
00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:03,800
Speaker 2: if let's say one hypothetical you say you talk to

468
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:06,119
Speaker 2: the brother and you're like, hey, there's gonna be all

469
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:07,919
Speaker 2: of this mess, Like how do you feel is there

470
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,359
Speaker 2: any like do you have any pres I'm trying to

471
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 2: figure out what I want to do, but also like

472
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:15,680
Speaker 2: do you have any preference? And maybe the brothers Like, honestly,

473
00:23:15,920 --> 00:23:19,520
Speaker 2: I hate dealing with homophobic people and I would rather

474
00:23:19,640 --> 00:23:23,200
Speaker 2: just go by myself and support you versus you having

475
00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:26,800
Speaker 2: to be the one that, like you kick it into

476
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:31,040
Speaker 2: his court. Yeah, I think there's it's a sucky situation

477
00:23:31,119 --> 00:23:33,480
Speaker 2: to be in, for sure, it is, and I and

478
00:23:33,560 --> 00:23:36,640
Speaker 2: I do and I really do empathize with op here.

479
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:40,080
Speaker 1: But if you care about your brother, the conversation before

480
00:23:40,080 --> 00:23:41,560
Speaker 1: you make a decision, you should have a conversation.

481
00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:44,760
Speaker 2: I think you should have a conversation. I think honestly, uh,

482
00:23:44,960 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 2: talking to your fiance and being like, yo, can we

483
00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:51,159
Speaker 2: tell your parents, Like hey, of course, you know we

484
00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:53,600
Speaker 2: want you there, your your you're her parents, and I'm

485
00:23:53,600 --> 00:23:57,320
Speaker 2: guessing they're supportive otherwise, but like this is our day,

486
00:23:57,520 --> 00:24:00,880
Speaker 2: and you are not to say anything or do anything

487
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:05,840
Speaker 2: to Opie's brother and Opie's brother's husband, like let them

488
00:24:05,840 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 2: be in peace, Like otherwise you're gonna like ruin our

489
00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:11,440
Speaker 2: day and like cause a rift in our relationship. Just

490
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:13,360
Speaker 2: just you know, leave them alone.

491
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:16,080
Speaker 1: I would, and I would almost like, do you even

492
00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:17,760
Speaker 1: want those people at your wedding? I don't know.

493
00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 2: That's what I like.

494
00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:21,919
Speaker 1: I I it was, I guess if you like, you

495
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,840
Speaker 1: have to invite them, Like you have to invite the parents.

496
00:24:25,200 --> 00:24:27,480
Speaker 1: I think I think I have a call with them.

497
00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:31,320
Speaker 1: It's like, hey, my my fiance's brother is going to

498
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:33,280
Speaker 1: be at the wedding. You have to be okay with

499
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:34,679
Speaker 1: that if.

500
00:24:34,560 --> 00:24:39,160
Speaker 2: You want to attend, Yes, absolutely, instead of on inviting

501
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:45,800
Speaker 2: someone who you actually care about and who not who

502
00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:47,400
Speaker 2: if you did not invite, you.

503
00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:50,400
Speaker 1: Would go against your values. Talk to the people who

504
00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:55,000
Speaker 1: don't represent those values, yes, and say I'm in. I

505
00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:59,000
Speaker 1: will invite you. But this is these are the circumstances

506
00:24:59,400 --> 00:25:00,920
Speaker 1: that you are invited under.

507
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:04,720
Speaker 2: You're you're punishing quote unquote the wrong person. You're yes,

508
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 2: you're punishing the wrong person. Yeah, you're punishing the wrong person. Like, yeah,

509
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:14,400
Speaker 2: they like the parents deserve some repercussion, Like how selfish that,

510
00:25:14,520 --> 00:25:20,000
Speaker 2: Like the parents let their own bigotry overtake their love

511
00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 2: and want for their child to have the most beautiful, easiest,

512
00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:25,600
Speaker 2: most amazing day possible.

513
00:25:25,680 --> 00:25:30,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think I have a feeling that maybe

514
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:36,359
Speaker 1: they will be silently you know, angry or disgruntled. But

515
00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:40,640
Speaker 1: I think if we have that conversation, lets that's really crazy. Well,

516
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:45,200
Speaker 1: but also that conversation will inform if you can actually

517
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 1: invite them.

518
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:49,040
Speaker 2: And I would say this is also a great test

519
00:25:49,080 --> 00:25:51,919
Speaker 2: on the parents. Yes, because if the parent says, like,

520
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:54,920
Speaker 2: if you say, like, hey, I I I want I

521
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:58,840
Speaker 2: love my brother, I love my brother's husband, you know,

522
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:02,160
Speaker 2: give us this day and you know, just our daily breain,

523
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,960
Speaker 2: don't don't don't, don't bring any problems to the wedding,

524
00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,439
Speaker 2: and the parents are like, we would never imagine that

525
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:14,359
Speaker 2: one the parents say, we would never imagine doing something

526
00:26:14,440 --> 00:26:17,639
Speaker 2: that would ruin your day. So we're here to to

527
00:26:17,720 --> 00:26:22,399
Speaker 2: do that. You pass the test, right, Or if they're like, no, no,

528
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:24,040
Speaker 2: we're gonna say what we want, We're gonna do what

529
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:24,320
Speaker 2: we want.

530
00:26:24,359 --> 00:26:26,240
Speaker 1: I really like where we came. I really like where

531
00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:28,440
Speaker 1: we came. Yeah, talk to the parents, talk to the parents,

532
00:26:28,480 --> 00:26:30,600
Speaker 1: and also talk to the brothers and then say like, hey,

533
00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:33,240
Speaker 1: this is what we've talked to the parents about it.

534
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,719
Speaker 1: I think now that I'm like we've kind of tossed around.

535
00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:41,920
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say yes, because you are punishing the wrong person.

536
00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:44,399
Speaker 2: I would agree. I would agree, but we have some

537
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:48,120
Speaker 2: relevant commons, ladies and gentlemen. First one from backstage Ninja,

538
00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:51,080
Speaker 2: you're the a whole. I understand. Uh, it's to make

539
00:26:51,160 --> 00:26:53,560
Speaker 2: life easier for a day that should be important to you,

540
00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:56,240
Speaker 2: But honestly it's still a crappy thing to do. Your

541
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,919
Speaker 2: wife needs to tell her family to just not be

542
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:03,160
Speaker 2: a holes for five hours out of their lives. Noisome

543
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:05,679
Speaker 2: wind says you're the a whole. We might just be

544
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:09,080
Speaker 2: getting a chorus of you're the a holes. Oh and

545
00:27:09,200 --> 00:27:12,240
Speaker 2: also for context, the verdict on the post was also

546
00:27:12,280 --> 00:27:15,960
Speaker 2: a whole, like the overall consensus. Instead of disinviting the

547
00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:19,159
Speaker 2: biggots who would cause problems, you're choosing to disinvite a

548
00:27:19,200 --> 00:27:22,679
Speaker 2: decent person who happens to be gay. Let me ask you, ape,

549
00:27:22,720 --> 00:27:24,679
Speaker 2: are you going to exclude your brother and his family

550
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:26,680
Speaker 2: from every family event from now on?

551
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:31,240
Speaker 1: That also is another great point, yep, Like, I think

552
00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:32,520
Speaker 1: stick with your values.

553
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:36,840
Speaker 2: Stick with your values if those are actually your values. Birthdays, holidays,

554
00:27:36,840 --> 00:27:39,800
Speaker 2: what happens if you have kids? Will you exclude them

555
00:27:39,840 --> 00:27:42,800
Speaker 2: from your kids' lives because your wife's family thinks they'll

556
00:27:42,840 --> 00:27:45,600
Speaker 2: be a bad influence. What if your kids are LGBT,

557
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:48,960
Speaker 2: will you cut off your wife's family then, or will

558
00:27:49,000 --> 00:27:52,159
Speaker 2: you let them mistreat your own children? What do you

559
00:27:52,240 --> 00:27:55,439
Speaker 2: think your exclusion of your brother's husband will teach your kids?

560
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 2: This is not the only time their beliefs will cause problems,

561
00:27:59,440 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 2: and you need to think about how you're going to

562
00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 2: proceed from here on out and the consequences your choices

563
00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 2: will have in years to come. Opie responds, this is

564
00:28:08,720 --> 00:28:11,359
Speaker 2: a good point. I never thought of it this way.

565
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:15,480
Speaker 1: Actually, that's good talking around learning and hey, you know

566
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,119
Speaker 1: what we were like, we were tossing around, talking at

567
00:28:18,119 --> 00:28:21,120
Speaker 1: different ideas. I think it took us as Sack to realize,

568
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:25,119
Speaker 1: like how to navigate this properly because a wedding is

569
00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,560
Speaker 1: so like, there's so many emotions and things tied to

570
00:28:27,600 --> 00:28:28,360
Speaker 1: a wedding.

571
00:28:28,119 --> 00:28:30,560
Speaker 2: So it deserves sitting down and really putting some good

572
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:35,800
Speaker 2: thought into it. Pleasant Edition says, Ope, consider that you're

573
00:28:35,960 --> 00:28:39,280
Speaker 2: siding with the people who are more bigoted than Mike

574
00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:43,959
Speaker 2: effing Pence, Opie says, noted. Crj G ninety five says

575
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:47,280
Speaker 2: if they were massive racists, would you ban all black

576
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:51,120
Speaker 2: people from your wedding to keep them happy? Opie says no,

577
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:55,360
Speaker 2: very yeah. Hypoxy eight says you're the ahle. Wow, you'll

578
00:28:55,360 --> 00:28:59,000
Speaker 2: make the appearance of sighting with homophobes rather than being inclusive.

579
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:01,719
Speaker 2: You're clearly not as open minded as you think you are.

580
00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:06,040
Speaker 2: Opie says, maybe I'm not. Honestly, everyone's responses really are

581
00:29:06,080 --> 00:29:10,200
Speaker 2: making me second guess my decision or thinking we're hearing

582
00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:14,840
Speaker 2: pants sup Fritz says, you're the ahole so so much

583
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:17,280
Speaker 2: it's hard to believe this is real. Be prepared to

584
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:19,400
Speaker 2: never speak to your brother again if you go through

585
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:21,520
Speaker 2: with this. What a slap in the face to him

586
00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:24,080
Speaker 2: and his husband. It isn't their fault. Your in laws

587
00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:27,320
Speaker 2: can't control their bigotry for one day. Opie says, I

588
00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:30,160
Speaker 2: do realize that maybe I am going about this wrong.

589
00:29:30,560 --> 00:29:33,040
Speaker 2: It's giving me a chance to think about it. Pants

590
00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,720
Speaker 2: Up Fritz says, I'm so happy to hear that. Thanks

591
00:29:35,800 --> 00:29:36,400
Speaker 2: for listening.

592
00:29:36,560 --> 00:29:40,080
Speaker 1: This is okay, like this person, this is good. We're

593
00:29:40,120 --> 00:29:43,320
Speaker 1: having good conversation. This is what it looks like to

594
00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:45,800
Speaker 1: have a conversation. You presented with an idea Yep, a

595
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:49,840
Speaker 1: situation that you have maybe never experienced before, and you

596
00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:53,040
Speaker 1: are going through the internet for legitimate help and people

597
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,720
Speaker 1: are giving you legitimate advice and you're taking it like

598
00:29:55,760 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 1: that's what that's what this is for, not just for

599
00:29:59,120 --> 00:30:00,440
Speaker 1: just like tearing down.

600
00:30:00,520 --> 00:30:03,400
Speaker 2: Yes, you're you're taking this criticism and being like, maybe

601
00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:05,640
Speaker 2: this is something that I can I can use and

602
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 2: learn from and do it to save me from making

603
00:30:10,400 --> 00:30:11,920
Speaker 2: wrong decisions. What a what?

604
00:30:11,920 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 1: What a blessings?

605
00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:16,760
Speaker 2: What a blessing? Uh Opie responds. I might think about

606
00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:19,480
Speaker 2: looking into some security or something like that just in

607
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:24,440
Speaker 2: case I I but do But dude, just the insanity

608
00:30:24,440 --> 00:30:27,600
Speaker 2: of it, would it really if it would hit that level,

609
00:30:28,000 --> 00:30:31,080
Speaker 2: just take him out, take take him out. Honestly.

610
00:30:31,320 --> 00:30:32,160
Speaker 1: Kind of sick.

611
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:40,880
Speaker 2: For sure. Oh but same, And you know what, there's

612
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:47,040
Speaker 2: something else crazy we got, that's right. So my original

613
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:48,840
Speaker 2: post got so much attention, and I got a lot

614
00:30:48,880 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 2: of requests for an update. Here you go. I went

615
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:54,880
Speaker 2: to my brother and his husband and mentioned that there

616
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:58,320
Speaker 2: was the potential of some serious negative reactions from my

617
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 2: fiance's family, and I asked them what they thought about

618
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 2: my brother coming solo without his husband to my wedding.

619
00:31:05,720 --> 00:31:13,640
Speaker 2: Wait wait, I thought we learned. I thought we learned.

620
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:17,400
Speaker 1: I thought I thought we had all had a learning moment. Yes,

621
00:31:18,160 --> 00:31:19,120
Speaker 1: and we had learned.

622
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 2: It looks like you were just about to go in

623
00:31:20,800 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 2: and ace the test and then you failed. How do

624
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,920
Speaker 2: you fail? A wait? This was past fail.

625
00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:30,920
Speaker 1: I'm so confused. We had all of these comments saying

626
00:31:30,960 --> 00:31:35,400
Speaker 1: you're the a hole. You responded to said comment and said, oh,

627
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 1: I'm going to like take this into account and I'm

628
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:41,920
Speaker 1: gonna listen, and then you bumble so odd.

629
00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:45,200
Speaker 2: We'll get ready for this, sam. I thought I was

630
00:31:45,240 --> 00:31:49,120
Speaker 2: providing a middle ground by asking them their opinion instead

631
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,600
Speaker 2: of just delegating who he could bring to be fair.

632
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:54,560
Speaker 1: That is one of the things that we brought up initially.

633
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,400
Speaker 2: But no, no, no, this is an important distinction because

634
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:00,960
Speaker 2: he said, we said, here's the situation. Is a preference

635
00:32:01,480 --> 00:32:02,160
Speaker 2: on what to do?

636
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:04,719
Speaker 1: Oh yeah yeah, like like I need advice on how

637
00:32:04,760 --> 00:32:05,960
Speaker 1: to navigate this? Oh?

638
00:32:06,040 --> 00:32:09,080
Speaker 2: He said, what do you think about not coming?

639
00:32:09,160 --> 00:32:12,040
Speaker 1: So is true? That is true because op is making

640
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:16,680
Speaker 1: their preference. It seems like their preference known. It's like, rather,

641
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:20,440
Speaker 1: it's like what you think about the proper if if

642
00:32:20,480 --> 00:32:22,200
Speaker 1: this was in your value, the proper thing would be

643
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:26,000
Speaker 1: to say, what do you think about you still coming? Yeah,

644
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,240
Speaker 1: with you and your boyfriend.

645
00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:30,440
Speaker 2: Or just like, uh, what would you like to do?

646
00:32:30,840 --> 00:32:34,200
Speaker 2: How I'm wondering how I could be supportive exactly, helping

647
00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:37,160
Speaker 2: them figure this out, just figure this out, figuring this out.

648
00:32:37,320 --> 00:32:39,360
Speaker 2: That would be a middle ground. That's what I'm saying,

649
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 2: at least that's what I'm saying. Yeah, much more of

650
00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:45,320
Speaker 2: a middle ground for sure. Unfortunately, this didn't go plan.

651
00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,800
Speaker 2: That's what Reddit told you. It didn't go his plan.

652
00:32:48,160 --> 00:32:51,440
Speaker 2: I told you, and they both got super offended and

653
00:32:51,520 --> 00:32:54,760
Speaker 2: said that I was discriminating against them. I told them

654
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:58,200
Speaker 2: that wasn't what I was doing. My guy, you don't

655
00:32:58,240 --> 00:32:59,000
Speaker 2: get to decide that.

656
00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:02,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, I wouldn't discriminating against you. I was asking if

657
00:33:02,760 --> 00:33:04,760
Speaker 1: you wanted me to discriminate.

658
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:09,680
Speaker 2: It exactly exactly. Oh my god, I was asking first.

659
00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:11,600
Speaker 2: I told them this wasn't what I was doing, because

660
00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 2: I was coming to them first and asking what they

661
00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:16,400
Speaker 2: thought and what they wanted to do. But they didn't listen.

662
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:19,880
Speaker 2: And now it's all ft. They didn't listen, or you

663
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:22,800
Speaker 2: didn't listen. My brother said he doesn't know if he

664
00:33:22,880 --> 00:33:25,080
Speaker 2: still wants to come to the wedding and his husband

665
00:33:25,080 --> 00:33:27,400
Speaker 2: got in my face and told me that I needed

666
00:33:27,400 --> 00:33:32,120
Speaker 2: to him. This was a few days ago and he

667
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:35,560
Speaker 2: still isn't talking to me. It's making me pretty upset.

668
00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:37,680
Speaker 2: How do you think they feel? My fiance says, I

669
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:40,040
Speaker 2: did the right thing, though I'm trying to reach out

670
00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:43,080
Speaker 2: to him closer to the wedding when things have calmed down,

671
00:33:43,440 --> 00:33:47,640
Speaker 2: as I do really want him there. Anyways, everyone's responses

672
00:33:47,760 --> 00:33:50,080
Speaker 2: really helped me out, and I wanted to update, did

673
00:33:50,080 --> 00:33:51,360
Speaker 2: it We have some top comments.

674
00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: The response has really helped you out because it sounds

675
00:33:53,840 --> 00:33:55,320
Speaker 1: like you didn't listen at all.

676
00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:59,080
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think people were pretty clear, and it seemed

677
00:33:59,120 --> 00:34:02,960
Speaker 2: like in the ones that were like pointing you in

678
00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:05,600
Speaker 2: this direction of like, hey, don't don't punish them. What

679
00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:10,319
Speaker 2: about the family? Yeah, you know, yeah, there's he could

680
00:34:10,320 --> 00:34:12,480
Speaker 2: have he could have gone to the family. I really

681
00:34:12,520 --> 00:34:15,040
Speaker 2: take time to think about it too. It's like, yeah,

682
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:18,239
Speaker 2: I really think. I mean, this is the conclusion we

683
00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:20,480
Speaker 2: we we both came to. But you go to the

684
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:25,040
Speaker 2: family first because there is a possibility that op, he

685
00:34:25,320 --> 00:34:27,840
Speaker 2: never has to burden the brother with us, and he

686
00:34:27,920 --> 00:34:31,239
Speaker 2: gets the parents to agree not to do anything, and

687
00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:32,560
Speaker 2: he's like perfect.

688
00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:34,360
Speaker 1: Now, punish the people who are bad.

689
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:37,839
Speaker 2: Punish the people who are bad. Punish the people who

690
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:38,279
Speaker 2: are bad.

691
00:34:38,840 --> 00:34:45,280
Speaker 1: But again, like I under I understand being emotionally clouded

692
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:47,759
Speaker 1: because of how much stuff you have to deal with

693
00:34:48,080 --> 00:34:51,600
Speaker 1: at a wedding and there's a lot of expectations and

694
00:34:51,680 --> 00:34:54,240
Speaker 1: emotions of a bunch of these family members to manage.

695
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:55,840
Speaker 1: I understand that.

696
00:34:55,760 --> 00:34:56,840
Speaker 2: I have empathy for op in this.

697
00:34:57,239 --> 00:35:03,520
Speaker 1: For sure, I have empathy that Ope is maybe not

698
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:05,440
Speaker 1: set up for success.

699
00:35:05,960 --> 00:35:10,480
Speaker 2: It's a it's a tough thing to do, and again, ultimately,

700
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:14,800
Speaker 2: this is your day. But also like like Sam, always

701
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:18,160
Speaker 2: want that data represent what what? Oh, that's a great question.

702
00:35:18,280 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 2: What do you want that data represent? And like what

703
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:24,200
Speaker 2: would what would you do? Like if I'm in this situation, Yeah,

704
00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:26,800
Speaker 2: I'm I'm I'm I want to protect my sister. Yeah,

705
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:28,720
Speaker 2: that's the person who I love and have this close

706
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:31,920
Speaker 2: relationship with and all these things. But we have some

707
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:35,480
Speaker 2: more relevant comments. Radio Supply says, we told you so,

708
00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:39,360
Speaker 2: I don't know, man drug emoji. They did tell him, so,

709
00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:41,239
Speaker 2: they did, they did tell him?

710
00:35:41,239 --> 00:35:42,360
Speaker 1: So did you did not listen?

711
00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:45,719
Speaker 2: National Mouse says, seriously, and your fiance said, you did

712
00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 2: the right thing. Literally over seventeen hundred comments of people

713
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:51,800
Speaker 2: telling you how wrong it was to disinvite your brother.

714
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,239
Speaker 2: He has every right to be upset. You screwed up

715
00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:59,600
Speaker 2: big time. Evil ginger says, Op, am I the a

716
00:35:59,680 --> 00:36:03,759
Speaker 2: whole the entire internet. You're the a hole and here's why. Also, Op,

717
00:36:04,040 --> 00:36:05,000
Speaker 2: how is I that a hole?

718
00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:05,720
Speaker 1: Yeah?

719
00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:08,360
Speaker 2: You didn't learn, didn't learn. Apple of my eye says

720
00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:10,680
Speaker 2: you're the a hole. You really didn't learn anything from

721
00:36:10,719 --> 00:36:13,279
Speaker 2: your last thread. Your brother saw right through you that

722
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,920
Speaker 2: you even considered asking your brother to leave his husband

723
00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:19,879
Speaker 2: at home. Who appease? Your bigoted in laws told uh,

724
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 2: told your brother everything he needed to know, and you

725
00:36:22,840 --> 00:36:25,760
Speaker 2: were cowardly about it. But now your brother has solved

726
00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 2: your dilemma for you and your in laws will have

727
00:36:28,719 --> 00:36:32,480
Speaker 2: a dandy time at your wedding. And that is it.

728
00:36:32,840 --> 00:36:34,919
Speaker 2: That is the conclusion. Stre We don't we don't get,

729
00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:37,040
Speaker 2: We don't know if the wedding happens or what.

730
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:39,960
Speaker 1: But you just made the wrong decision.

731
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:42,799
Speaker 2: Dude, he had like he he got the tools. It

732
00:36:42,840 --> 00:36:43,839
Speaker 2: was looking it was.

733
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 1: Looking so good. We are so optimist.

734
00:36:46,320 --> 00:36:49,080
Speaker 2: We love, we love a good teachable moment. Yes, let's

735
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:52,680
Speaker 2: come together, let's let's hear each other sides that this

736
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:53,879
Speaker 2: is what this is for.

737
00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:57,480
Speaker 1: It's like, I am unsure, I need help, and then

738
00:36:57,600 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 1: we hope the internet can give you some help. And

739
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:06,040
Speaker 1: they did, and ope took this gold nugget and flushed

740
00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:06,840
Speaker 1: it down the toilet.

741
00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:10,680
Speaker 2: It's okay to not know something, not be aware of something,

742
00:37:11,160 --> 00:37:13,880
Speaker 2: be ignorant about a thing, but then learn and be like,

743
00:37:14,040 --> 00:37:17,080
Speaker 2: this is good information. I'm gonna use this and uh yeah,

744
00:37:17,160 --> 00:37:17,920
Speaker 2: do something good with it.

745
00:37:18,040 --> 00:37:22,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, Like, it's okay to ignore subscribing maybe once or twice,

746
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:26,560
Speaker 1: maybe once or twice, but but three times, four times

747
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:30,200
Speaker 1: when we watched more than four videos that you haven't subscribed,

748
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:34,320
Speaker 1: What are you doing? Subscribe? Nice?

749
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:37,200
Speaker 2: Let's make this official. Yeah, let's do it.

750
00:37:37,400 --> 00:37:41,239
Speaker 1: Or you're uninvited to my wedding ouch and mine, but

751
00:37:41,360 --> 00:37:44,120
Speaker 1: I am inviting you to this next story.

752
00:37:44,440 --> 00:37:45,040
Speaker 2: Let's get it