Speaker 1: Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Speaker 1: Show weekdays at two a m. Eastern eleven pm Pacific boom.
Speaker 1: Have you thought four hours a day, minutes a week
Speaker 1: was enough, Think again. He's the last remnants of the
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Speaker 1: in the ghetto cutter the same as the rich pill
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Speaker 1: Break Free for Something Special Hour with Ben Maller starts
Speaker 1: right now in the air everywhere, taking over the cosmos
Speaker 1: the vast and powerful reach of the I Heart podcasting Network.
Speaker 1: Because list seven days not enough, So we do this
Speaker 1: now eight days a week, in four hours in the
Speaker 1: overnight not enough. This is a spin off. As you know,
Speaker 1: you've downloaded the show, you support the show. We thank
Speaker 1: you for finding the show. A spinoff of the Ben
Speaker 1: Maller Hard O Sports Show, which is not even really
Speaker 1: a hard Oh sport show. It's it's it's a It
Speaker 1: starts about sports and then it goes off into tangents
Speaker 1: and other things. And this podcast today is a it
Speaker 1: is not a political podcast. That was yesterday we had
Speaker 1: Dave Ruben on from the Reuben Report, who was great.
Speaker 1: I loved him. It was wonderful. We'll have to have
Speaker 1: him on again. I'm sure we'll have him on several
Speaker 1: times again. But today is I was hanging out. We're
Speaker 1: just hanging out myself and West of the four oh five.
Speaker 1: David Gascon, Gaston Gaston. Uh. I can't. I can't imagine
Speaker 1: because I we, I know, we've we've mentioned this year
Speaker 1: pretty much every day recently. But I get emails from people,
Speaker 1: you know somewhere like congratulating you on your relative becoming
Speaker 1: the district attorneys. People think you are related to the
Speaker 1: looney bin, the just nuts so crazy trained district attorney
Speaker 1: in Los Angeles who's letting criminals run free. It's just
Speaker 1: it's just you come from a police family, which is
Speaker 1: the complete opposites wild and they worked together, they worked
Speaker 1: together back in the day. I think the one element
Speaker 1: that caught me up in arms last week was when
Speaker 1: one of the local Fox reporters had reported a story
Speaker 1: where d A. Gascon wants to he wants a prisoner
Speaker 1: who's who's under investigation, is actually waiting for trial on
Speaker 1: a on a murder of a police officer. He wants
Speaker 1: him to be eligible for parole. Yeah, that seems and
Speaker 1: not just I mean, you shouldn't kill anybody. He's killed
Speaker 1: two people, not just the police. And and this was
Speaker 1: like an execution in the back of the back of
Speaker 1: the head fast food restaurant. The guy's eating a burger,
Speaker 1: trying to order a damn burger. This guy comes in,
Speaker 1: this loser kills him. And we haven't the people of
Speaker 1: California because this shows you that the elections are total bullcrap.
Speaker 1: That this guy guess going one because he had the
Speaker 1: most money. I bet you most people though they couldn't
Speaker 1: you pick out anything of of you know what, his background.
Speaker 1: They didn't really look at it that closely. If they had,
Speaker 1: I can't imagine they would have voted for this lunatic
Speaker 1: considering what he did in San Francisco. And now he's like, hey,
Speaker 1: hold my beer. San Francisco, we had people shipping in
Speaker 1: the streets in San Francisco. But l a, oh, we'll
Speaker 1: take it next level, which is unbelievable because we live
Speaker 1: in the world of we need to put everyone in
Speaker 1: a box, whether it's their gender, skin tone, religion, sexual orientation. No,
Speaker 1: I didn't agree with anything or everything, but Jackie Lacey
Speaker 1: was our district attorney, and she was homegrown. She went
Speaker 1: to u C. L A and she graduated from there.
Speaker 1: This is a Democrat. She represented the city of Los Angeles,
Speaker 1: like she had a lot of these checks in, you know,
Speaker 1: on that column for people that were looking for maybe
Speaker 1: someone that wasn't let's say, a typical white male. She
Speaker 1: was anything them. But and apparently it was not good enough.
Speaker 1: So we go all, we had all these big protests,
Speaker 1: you know, I take to the streets. You know, we've
Speaker 1: gotta we've got to solve all these issues. And then
Speaker 1: you know, my god, she was the first African American
Speaker 1: woman to serve as the l A District attorney. But
Speaker 1: apparently that wasn't good enough. Well, and then also you always,
Speaker 1: like you look to law enforcement, who to the law
Speaker 1: enforcement people supporting you know, that's generally you know, that's
Speaker 1: that's not the only thing you look at, but it's something,
Speaker 1: and they all supported Jackie Lacey. Nobody, nobody wanted to
Speaker 1: turn l A into the lawless Old West, which apparently,
Speaker 1: um we've got here from all the sinners become saints.
Speaker 1: It would appear here under this district attorney. So it's
Speaker 1: pretty it's pretty wild. So anyway, on this podcast, we
Speaker 1: have Modern Medical Miracle, a Mallard podcast exclusive. You have
Speaker 1: not heard this on the radio show at all our
Speaker 1: bah humbug. And we've also got Get Soupy. We've got
Speaker 1: Get Soupy as well. I need your advice on something too, Okay,
Speaker 1: So before we get into any of that, I need
Speaker 1: your your professional take on this as a as a
Speaker 1: historically bad eater that has turned good. Um, when is
Speaker 1: the cutoff date for you to eat fruit? What do
Speaker 1: you mean? Like the expiration day? Yeah? So when when
Speaker 1: you look at let's say, um, a banana or an
Speaker 1: apple or maybe even a keywi. Look, where is that
Speaker 1: point of no return? Like where are you throwing it out?
Speaker 1: And when are you're eating it? Well, there's a couple
Speaker 1: of things. First of all, you gotta do the smell test.
Speaker 1: That's the most important. If it smells funky, don't eat it. Secondly,
Speaker 1: you do the field test. You gotta grab it and
Speaker 1: kind of hold it and squeeze it. Does it feel right? Still?
Speaker 1: Does it have the same buoyancy it's supposed to have
Speaker 1: a piece of fruit? If not, um, then then I
Speaker 1: don't do it. But I I'm as we've talked about
Speaker 1: in the past on the pod, it's like my my
Speaker 1: wife has thrown out more food that is just oh,
Speaker 1: it's it's it's almost the expiration day. Let's get rid
Speaker 1: of it. And I'm like, no, no, no, I mean
Speaker 1: I know there are there are stores that I've been
Speaker 1: to that cell expired food because it's still fine to eat.
Speaker 1: It's just an it's a it's an estimate, is what
Speaker 1: it is, right anyway, So so yeah, I'm not I'm
Speaker 1: the wrong person. I do the smell field test and
Speaker 1: then I go for it, usually very really and like
Speaker 1: the banana thing, well everyone but not everyone. A lot
Speaker 1: of people do this. My wife does this where with
Speaker 1: the bananas turned bad, they turned color, then you just
Speaker 1: make banana break, right right, that's the veteran that's the
Speaker 1: veteran movement. Although I read that the bananas are fine
Speaker 1: to eat even after they turn all googley and soggy
Speaker 1: and nasty and all that, they're not, I think I
Speaker 1: was fake news I read on the internet. I had
Speaker 1: a I had a cautiously bad West of the four
Speaker 1: or five moment a couple of days ago, which that's
Speaker 1: why I'm asking you. I you know, typically in the
Speaker 1: morning time I'll run or work out or whatnot, and
Speaker 1: then eat later on the day. But on this day,
Speaker 1: I decided to make myself a protein shake in the morning,
Speaker 1: and it consisted of some questionable bananas and some questionable kiwi's,
Speaker 1: and um, it made me think about you in a
Speaker 1: certain park. Oh, you had the you had to we
Speaker 1: call that now the Lamar Jackson you had the I
Speaker 1: don't think I don't think I've run. I don't think
Speaker 1: I've run that fast from point A to point B
Speaker 1: to finishal a workout that I did on that day.
Speaker 1: And then the rest of the day I was I
Speaker 1: was in the infirmary known as the bathroom. So you
Speaker 1: were like Sonic the hedge. Yeah, you were as you
Speaker 1: were running. Uh yeah, listen, I've obviously been there a
Speaker 1: couple of times. You know, that scamper and the thing.
Speaker 1: And now you can you can relate to Lamar Jackson
Speaker 1: because when you saw the Lamar Jackson video, he said
Speaker 1: he had a cramp, which no one believes. That no
Speaker 1: one believes because you could tell as he was walking
Speaker 1: he was kind of holding his took his cheeks together,
Speaker 1: that's the sign of someone that's got a dysentery situation.
Speaker 1: He's got they called that. In the back of the day,
Speaker 1: the term was the Tennessee Trots. They called it. And
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, I've seen it. We we have seen that.
Speaker 1: And uh, you know he's got the diaper gravy going
Speaker 1: on there, and so you had that. We'll welcome to
Speaker 1: the club, man, welcome to the club. It was. It
Speaker 1: was horrifying just to be in that element where you
Speaker 1: get to your destination and all of a sudden you
Speaker 1: feel like not good. It's just memories of dumb and
Speaker 1: dumber with the Lloyd Christmas um doing a little something
Speaker 1: with a laxative in a drink. Now, let's crank it
Speaker 1: up a couple of notches, make it even more awkward
Speaker 1: and uncomfortable and difficult. Um, So now do that running
Speaker 1: sprinting with the Tennessee Trots. Right, had a little dysentery there,
Speaker 1: and you make it to the toilet, but you don't
Speaker 1: want to sit on the toilet, so you want to
Speaker 1: strat it like it's kind of like the squatty potty.
Speaker 1: And then you think you have hit the bowl with
Speaker 1: your steaming dump and this ship shows over and then
Speaker 1: you turn around and it's a crime scene. It's uh,
Speaker 1: it's the worst thing you've ever seen. Uh, And then
Speaker 1: you have to decide do I just leave and leave
Speaker 1: this horrific discuss the whole back wall covered in brown poop?
Speaker 1: Or do you try to clean it up a little bit?
Speaker 1: See that's that's where it's just it's really thorny. It's
Speaker 1: it's delicate. Yeah, it's a very delicate proposition, especially when yeah,
Speaker 1: you feel a little tinkle maybe on your ankles, on
Speaker 1: your calf maybe like delicate it's not good. Or you're
Speaker 1: like at that moment, you're like, well, I'm probably getting
Speaker 1: most of it in. You know, maybe not, but I'm
Speaker 1: getting most of it. And then you turn around you
Speaker 1: come agitated. You're like, holy crap. It brings me back
Speaker 1: to one of my favorite movies, Predator, and Mac has
Speaker 1: the mini gun or he's trying to hit the predator
Speaker 1: and he just spray hasn't praise that mini gun, and
Speaker 1: he doesn't hit a fucking thing, but all the trees
Speaker 1: and the entire forest is decimated because of gunfire, but
Speaker 1: he doesn't hit his mark. That That is it right there? Yeah,
Speaker 1: it is uh, it's it's it's interesting. Uh what's the term.
Speaker 1: Is it down range? I think it's not the term, yeah, downrange. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a that's a tough one anyway. All Right, So
Speaker 1: as far as the this kind of relates loosely, kind
Speaker 1: of relates loose no pun intended. Yeah, to the to
Speaker 1: the conversation we're having modern medical miracle. Now I've never
Speaker 1: told this story. I'm violating my own hippo laws on this. Um,
Speaker 1: So I have a Mallard medical update. So during Halloween,
Speaker 1: right around Halloween, um, you know, I don't I don't
Speaker 1: eat too much, as you know, you'd like to tease
Speaker 1: me with food porn. So Halloween week, my wife had
Speaker 1: bought this big bag of Costco candy bars nice and
Speaker 1: one night in particular, I just decided to go for it,
Speaker 1: you know. I flashed back to my fatty days, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm gonna just load up on this, you know,
Speaker 1: and go for it. I'm gonna live like I, you know,
Speaker 1: lived back in the day. And so I was double
Speaker 1: fisting candy bars and gummy worms. One hand was like chocolate,
Speaker 1: the other hand was gummy worms. Anyway, so I went
Speaker 1: to lay down to go to bed is on the
Speaker 1: weekend and my head starts spinning. I'm dizzy, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: holy crap. So I did what anyone would do. I
Speaker 1: went online to try to figure out why, you know,
Speaker 1: I'd never had this happened to me before ever, why
Speaker 1: this was going on. And I it every every medical website,
Speaker 1: you know, web MD. All those things said sign a diabetic,
Speaker 1: you're diabetic. My both my parents, my mom passed away,
Speaker 1: my dad's all around diabetic, and they said you're more
Speaker 1: prone to being diabetic. So this was very concerning to me.
Speaker 1: You might imagine, so um and that at around that time,
Speaker 1: we found out that Roberto, who works on the show,
Speaker 1: obviously is diabetic as well, and so I'm freaking out.
Speaker 1: I changed changed a few things around um, and then
Speaker 1: I went to get some lab tests done on my blood.
Speaker 1: In fact, I just got them done this week. I
Speaker 1: was reluctant to go because of the COVID thing. I
Speaker 1: was like, I don't want to go to a hospital
Speaker 1: right now, and of course I was right. The weight
Speaker 1: was it took me an hour to get my blood drawn,
Speaker 1: and the weight it was brutal because they only had
Speaker 1: a couple of stations open, you know, those people waiting
Speaker 1: to get their blood drawn. So I had a bunch
Speaker 1: of blood taken out of my left arm. Now keep
Speaker 1: in mind my my experiences with doctors is normally bad.
Speaker 1: I don't have good experiences with doctors. So I'm I'm
Speaker 1: waiting for the results here, and I'm thinking the worst. Right,
Speaker 1: I'm expecting that call. We're gonna put on seven different
Speaker 1: drugs for the rest of your life. You're diabetic, You're
Speaker 1: a loser, how dare you? And the results were a
Speaker 1: modern medical miracle. Was stunning. It was I like using
Speaker 1: the word hum dinger. This is a humdinger. So the
Speaker 1: doctor calls me up, and the doctor wanted me to
Speaker 1: explain how my labs had improved so much in a
Speaker 1: couple of years since I last had them done. And
Speaker 1: apparently this blew me away. I had been diabetic. I
Speaker 1: didn't know it. Most people don't know they're diabetic. And
Speaker 1: because of my my diet changed, my inter minute fasting,
Speaker 1: and my lifestyle changes. I am even though I guess
Speaker 1: I'm still technically diebetic, I'm not. They don't have to
Speaker 1: put me my medicine, and they think I'm fine, Um
Speaker 1: that I've I've self medicated with my lifestyle changes where
Speaker 1: I don't have to worry about that stuff. Um, my
Speaker 1: levels were so low that they like they couldn't figure
Speaker 1: it out. They're like, how the hell did you did
Speaker 1: you do some I mean they were trying to it's
Speaker 1: all because the intermitte fasting. It's wild. Wow. So it's
Speaker 1: just apparently because I I don't normally eat so much
Speaker 1: candy and junk food that that night I overtoased and
Speaker 1: my body could not handle it because it wasn't used
Speaker 1: to that amount of sugar that I don't usually eat.
Speaker 1: And I might eat some like chocolate, almonds or something
Speaker 1: from time to time, but that's pretty much the extent
Speaker 1: of it. And so they that they think that's why
Speaker 1: I was all wobbly and like tripping, like I was
Speaker 1: drunk and my head was smitting. So when you got
Speaker 1: your your blood, your labs back, did you go through
Speaker 1: the full gamut of testing, like did you do triglycerites,
Speaker 1: your HDL, your l d L, your cholesterol, like did
Speaker 1: you do everything? Yeah, they went through all that. My
Speaker 1: liver function and everything was really my liver improved tremendously.
Speaker 1: I didn't realize it was a problem. Apparently they were like,
Speaker 1: there was something going on there. And I now keep
Speaker 1: in mind, I want to put a disclaimer on this, Gascount.
Speaker 1: You should never take medical advice from a podcaster or
Speaker 1: an overnight radio hack. Um. You should make your own
Speaker 1: lifestyle choices and your own changes. But I am. I'm
Speaker 1: fully invested in the cult of intermitute fasting and I
Speaker 1: don't know how long I'll live. I hope I live
Speaker 1: a long time. But however long I live, I will
Speaker 1: I'll be if I am I lucky enough to get
Speaker 1: to my eighties and nineties or whatever, I will continue this.
Speaker 1: This is this is with me now. Um, I'm not changing.
Speaker 1: So it was wild, man, I was. I was convinced
Speaker 1: I was diabetic. I was convinced that I was going
Speaker 1: to go on all these drugs and I was totally
Speaker 1: screwed up. And that is the kind of thing you
Speaker 1: do not expect when you get the other news, the
Speaker 1: good news. I was like, Wow, that's wild. Now, what
Speaker 1: was the motivating factor behind getting your blood drawn? The
Speaker 1: wife she forced me to Well, I was gonna say,
Speaker 1: because you can do an annual physical and it's free
Speaker 1: of charge with your insurance provider if you have private insurance. No, No,
Speaker 1: I just wanted to get you know, I wanted to
Speaker 1: with the whole I'm not like most people with the
Speaker 1: COVID thing. You know, every time I go by that
Speaker 1: there's a hospital right now where I live, and there's
Speaker 1: a line. I've sent you photos of that. I mean,
Speaker 1: there's people lined up around the street to get tested
Speaker 1: for this, that and the other thing, which I think
Speaker 1: is COVID, and I kind of avoid that for now.
Speaker 1: And it's like it's I don't feel like it's urgent.
Speaker 1: I mean because it only happened a couple of times,
Speaker 1: and that that week I was eating all the candy. Um.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I'm all about and the doctor was like, well,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm kind of The doc was like, I'm
Speaker 1: kind of on inter minute fasting because I don't know
Speaker 1: I as a doctor. You're in the hospital or whatever,
Speaker 1: and you're you know, you don't eat for a while.
Speaker 1: But yeah, Now a cheat code for you, Ben, and
Speaker 1: for for listeners out there. If you do get your
Speaker 1: annual physical and you get your labs like like Ben
Speaker 1: had done, you can actually instruct your doctor to request
Speaker 1: other things measured So for men, if you want to
Speaker 1: get your testostero measured, your vitamin D levels measured, um,
Speaker 1: vitamin C, like all those other things that you typically
Speaker 1: have to pay for, if you say that you want
Speaker 1: them get them tested for preventative reasons, they can include
Speaker 1: that into the report and not charge you for it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: little life hacked from David get Yeah, I found that out.
Speaker 1: See earlier this year when we were talking about I
Speaker 1: had some ear issues. I had my my physical done
Speaker 1: and the doctor decided to just add a boatload of
Speaker 1: things to my my blood. So from my labs, I
Speaker 1: had to draw six vials of blood, but he included
Speaker 1: everything in there so I wouldn't have to be charged
Speaker 1: for it, and we labeled it as preventative reasons. And
Speaker 1: because of that, Yeah, if I didn't, it was like
Speaker 1: seventy five dollars, I think to measure your vitamin D
Speaker 1: or to measure your testosterone, all those other things you
Speaker 1: can do, but you get it free a charge once
Speaker 1: every year. So it's a great little life hack for you.
Speaker 1: That's pretty cool. That's that's that's my medical update. And
Speaker 1: I'm like I was excited about it. I was dreading it.
Speaker 1: I was like when I was waiting, because you don't
Speaker 1: actually see the doctor. You go in and have the
Speaker 1: test and then the doctor calls you. Now you know,
Speaker 1: so that's it. But don't bury the Leadum a man,
Speaker 1: what what did you clock in at? What's your weight?
Speaker 1: Because you are no longer You're no longer skinny Santa.
Speaker 1: I mean you're no longer fat. Said you were skinny Santa.
Speaker 1: Now that's right. I forgot we were wants to talk
Speaker 1: about the Santa thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I've I've
Speaker 1: lost you know, I don't give my fighting weight. I'm
Speaker 1: not quite at where I want to be. Um, you know,
Speaker 1: I still have because I was really fat for a
Speaker 1: long time. I've still got some some skin kind of
Speaker 1: hanging around places and stuff. But I'm I'm satisfied with
Speaker 1: where I'm at now. I want to lose a little
Speaker 1: more and I feel like every pound I lose I
Speaker 1: might be gett an extra day. So I mess although too.
Speaker 1: There is a point where then then it becomes a negative.
Speaker 1: And I know Supermarket Steve and his wife were very
Speaker 1: concerned about me because they like you, You're get a
Speaker 1: little too crazy with this diet stuff. See that's the
Speaker 1: problem when you're a big fat guy. You lose weight,
Speaker 1: people think you're sick. You know, it's it's a big,
Speaker 1: big issue here. But I did play Santa last week.
Speaker 1: They strapped me to the back of a fire truck
Speaker 1: and we drove around a city in southern California, right
Speaker 1: in the in the foothills there, and it was awesome.
Speaker 1: It was it was bigger. I've done this now like
Speaker 1: five six years something like that, I don't know how long,
Speaker 1: And it was awesome. It was so much fun, and
Speaker 1: it was bigger this year than it's ever been because
Speaker 1: everyone is so freaking bored and they've got nothing to do,
Speaker 1: and this was the highlight to see the joy on
Speaker 1: people's faces who have been in this prolonged stressful situation
Speaker 1: of COVID and locked in their homes and not able
Speaker 1: to go a lot of places. Get some takeout food
Speaker 1: in a doggy bag and get out of here. And
Speaker 1: there were people it was I felt like I was
Speaker 1: in the Rose Parade and I'm the star of the
Speaker 1: Rose Parade, like they were. I'm the biggest float and uh,
Speaker 1: I have the ribbon on it and on that. Because
Speaker 1: there were people that had their chairs outside on the
Speaker 1: lawn waiting to wave at Santa and the and the
Speaker 1: elves and all that. It was really neat. It was
Speaker 1: a lot of fun, and they were you know, it
Speaker 1: went to all parts of the city. I mean, we
Speaker 1: were up in the hills and it was night. It
Speaker 1: was this was Friday night we did this, and it
Speaker 1: got really freaking cold up in the hills. There's some
Speaker 1: beautiful houses though, man, my god, to manches some costas
Speaker 1: up there, and these are like neighborhoods I would never
Speaker 1: go to. I don't think I'm allowed. I don't have
Speaker 1: enough money to go to these neighborhos. And then these
Speaker 1: huge houses, and there was one that was really cool.
Speaker 1: They had all these little kids out and they had like,
Speaker 1: you know, the Christmas theme out there, and they were
Speaker 1: out and sitting waiting anxiously, you know, wait and see
Speaker 1: the parade. It was pretty pretty neat. It was a
Speaker 1: lot of fun, and you know, hopefully I'd like to
Speaker 1: think that it goes back to the way it had
Speaker 1: been where it's not over the top, like this is
Speaker 1: the biggest thing in your life. But you know, for
Speaker 1: this year, it was. It was tremendous and so I
Speaker 1: want to thank the police, the fire you know, obviously
Speaker 1: dealing with the fire department in the police department over there,
Speaker 1: and it was pretty cool. That is awesome. But again
Speaker 1: you went from you went from big old sand to
Speaker 1: to just just a dude, you know. And those those
Speaker 1: scannu the Santa pants made me look like they were
Speaker 1: like skinny jeans on me, which is really scary. I
Speaker 1: should never And the revealing part is usually when Santa's
Speaker 1: were those big thick black belts, when you put it
Speaker 1: through the loop, it looks like there's only a little
Speaker 1: bit of slack. You had a ton of slack. You
Speaker 1: had an I had too much slack. I had way
Speaker 1: too much, way too much slack. Now, all right, so
Speaker 1: speaking of Christmas, all right, speaking of Christmas and Hanukah
Speaker 1: which is now over. Honka just ended. So speaking of
Speaker 1: all this, um, let's get soupy. Now. This is a
Speaker 1: guy I actually met early in my radio career and
Speaker 1: he popped up in the news this week and it
Speaker 1: was like, whoa wait a minute, here there's an actor
Speaker 1: by the name of Larry Thomas. You know who Larry
Speaker 1: Thomas is. He's rather generic guy in Hollywood. You know
Speaker 1: Larry Thomas. I know it Joe Thomas. Um No, I
Speaker 1: do not know Larry Thomas. Well, Larry Thomas spent a
Speaker 1: number of years as mostly a character actor, I would
Speaker 1: say based on what I know of him. Um. But
Speaker 1: his one cameo role, which was a huge success that
Speaker 1: has lived on over the last twenty five years as
Speaker 1: an all time great Hollywood roll he was Larry Thomas
Speaker 1: the soup Nazi on Seinfeld. One of the most famous
Speaker 1: episodes of Seinfeld The soupnots and And he was on
Speaker 1: a few of those episodes. But anyway, so I met him.
Speaker 1: He he was a cigar connoisseur and they had a
Speaker 1: the Cigar show. The was doing local radio in l A.
Speaker 1: These guys were trying to start this cigar show. I
Speaker 1: think they had it. It was a weekend show and
Speaker 1: I had to do a Saturday morning show in addition
Speaker 1: to the week show that I was doing weekday show.
Speaker 1: And so I'd come in there and they would be
Speaker 1: recording that we were on the eighth floor of this
Speaker 1: skyscraper in l A. And they would be smoking cigars.
Speaker 1: You're not supposed to smoke in there, and uh, you know,
Speaker 1: just you know, guy. It was back in the nineties.
Speaker 1: Men could be men, you know, to stosterone was flowing,
Speaker 1: guys were being guys, and uh, you know, he was
Speaker 1: the Soup Nazi and doing that whole thing. And so
Speaker 1: I I met him a few times. I bring this
Speaker 1: up because the CEO of Cameo. Did you see this?
Speaker 1: He was on a guest appearance on some podcast and
Speaker 1: revealed how much the Soup Nazi makes from cameo per year.
Speaker 1: You want to take a guess how much he makes
Speaker 1: per year from cameo. I don't want to be bad
Speaker 1: on this, Let me guess. I will say per year.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna say two fifty dollars. Okay, Well, to me
Speaker 1: see the idea of making any kind of real money
Speaker 1: on cameo. I mean, I do a couple of bucks here,
Speaker 1: a couple bucks there. I mean, I'm gonna nobody he
Speaker 1: makes you're you're probably right. He makes over six figures
Speaker 1: a year doing cameo videos. And it starts he's like
Speaker 1: eighty dollars a cameo and he's making over a hundred
Speaker 1: thousand for these little thirty second, one minute videos. Holy crap.
Speaker 1: And um. Anyway, the guy that the CEO, the guy
Speaker 1: that runs the parent company of Cameo here to apologize
Speaker 1: UM for revealing how much money the guy makes. But
Speaker 1: UM apparently is a ton of these celebrities that are
Speaker 1: making an extra hundred thousand dollars. If the Soup Nazi, Okay,
Speaker 1: if the Soup Nazi is making that, how much do
Speaker 1: you think Floyd Mayweather or Drew Brees or the Woutang
Speaker 1: clan are making you know what I'm I mean, It's
Speaker 1: just it's wild. Think about some of those people from
Speaker 1: the Office. You know how popular that show was. There's
Speaker 1: a bunch of characters from the Office that are on there.
Speaker 1: Uh the uh one of they I'm looking at some
Speaker 1: of the prices, the one of three hundred dollars, Leslie Baker,
Speaker 1: Leslie David Baker. He was the funny guy, the African
Speaker 1: American guy in the office, you know, kind of overweight guy.
Speaker 1: Um three hundred bucks. H Who else? I mean, there's
Speaker 1: go on and on. It's just crazy. I'm good for them.
Speaker 1: By the way, I raised my rate as I said,
Speaker 1: I would have forty dollars now, perfect holiday gift to
Speaker 1: a fan of the show, Cameo. Unless it's not. I'm
Speaker 1: just saying it's it's a possibility right, it's a positive.
Speaker 1: It's out there. You can you know, it's tossing that out. Cameo, cameo, cameo,
Speaker 1: look my name up, Ben Mallor. And if you hey,
Speaker 1: if you're Jones, and I'm I've got some some much
Speaker 1: earned time off here to the start of one and
Speaker 1: so we're not gonna be doing monologues. And if you're Jones,
Speaker 1: and for a Maller monologue, a mini MALLARW monologue, not
Speaker 1: a full Maller monologue, mini MALLERW monologue, I'll give you that.
Speaker 1: I's like something big happens. You want a minimal emergency
Speaker 1: mini Maller monologue only for you. I'm in there, you go.
Speaker 1: So it's out there. So cameo dot com bat but
Speaker 1: good luck the soup not see good good God, hundred
Speaker 1: over a hundred at least a hundred thousand, you said
Speaker 1: two hundred fifty. Who knows how much it actually is.
Speaker 1: And just that's unbelievable to me. Right over, So if
Speaker 1: you're making let's just say, over the course of a
Speaker 1: calendar year, if you're doing one cameo appearance every day
Speaker 1: the entire year, it's two d and seventy four dollars. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's what you're charging per day, and obviously he's
Speaker 1: not doing one per day. Yeah, I hear. It's uh,
Speaker 1: you know what you should do. You should raise your
Speaker 1: rate to like a hundred or a hundred fifty bucks
Speaker 1: and see if you get any bites. I don't want
Speaker 1: to be that guy. You're not that guy. You're just
Speaker 1: you're you. I okay, So what's your threshold then, like,
Speaker 1: what's the max you would go to? Well, the only
Speaker 1: reason I raised my prices because they started taking extra
Speaker 1: fees out of it, and so I was like, what's
Speaker 1: the point of that. I mean, you spent some time
Speaker 1: dealing with this stuff. But if I actually became popular,
Speaker 1: I guess I would be like a mod rashot in
Speaker 1: charge a hundred dollars or you are popular? No, I'm
Speaker 1: I'm popular. I'm overnight radio popular. You know, there's a
Speaker 1: there's a difference has been popularity, Like overnight radio. Dennis
Speaker 1: Rodman charges seven hundred and fifty dollars for a cameo
Speaker 1: US Denis Robbie's and pop Icon He's and you know
Speaker 1: pop uh friend of the North Korean dictator and all
Speaker 1: that you eat, you eat bull testicles on Instagram. You
Speaker 1: have Arizona reporters that write articles about you. I'd say
Speaker 1: it's safe to say that you're pretty popular. We got
Speaker 1: a little pub in Pittsburgh this week. My rant about
Speaker 1: Ben Roethlisberger was picked up by some of the social
Speaker 1: media feeds of the newspapers in Pittsburgh. But were there, Uh.
Speaker 1: I'll give the Pittsburgh fans credit. They were not nearly
Speaker 1: as offended as the Arizona like. I feel like the
Speaker 1: Steeler fan base is more receptive to criticism, which is
Speaker 1: a good thing. That's a good thing. I didn't get
Speaker 1: nearly as much ship as I got from the loot
Speaker 1: it takes in the Valley of the Sun as I
Speaker 1: did from the people to Pittsburgh when I took some
Speaker 1: shots at Roethlisberger being done, and they didn't. They didn't
Speaker 1: really seem all that bother and a few people were upset,
Speaker 1: but it wasn't anything like it was me Kyler Murray,
Speaker 1: Oh my god, hellighet her arms? How dare you? What's
Speaker 1: wrong with yo? God? Day about you know that? Well,
Speaker 1: maybe it's because you're attacking his you know, his stature
Speaker 1: as opposed to his performance. His performance based criticism. His
Speaker 1: stature is part of his performance. Tylu, the coach of
Speaker 1: the Clippers, charges two hundred sixteen dollars for Oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: now Boban Marjanovitch. I like him hundred and fifty bucks. Boban.
Speaker 1: What do you think that he's the big fat guy?
Speaker 1: Does Jim Kramer have a cameo account? Check here? Give
Speaker 1: me one sec Jim Kramer. Just start doing that for
Speaker 1: investment advice. Follow me on. I do not see Jim Kramer.
Speaker 1: There's a Joey Kramer that is on there, but I
Speaker 1: did not see there's the market for that Jim Kramer.
Speaker 1: Jim Labors is on there. You can request a cameo
Speaker 1: from me and I can get into uh do you
Speaker 1: know Jim Labors? Of course we can get. He follows Twitter.
Speaker 1: We can get we can get lays on. He follows
Speaker 1: me on Twitter. I think he does some nonprofit stuff
Speaker 1: in New York, doesn't he? Yeah, he's like he's by coastal.
Speaker 1: I believe he spent some time in Orange County. Um.
Speaker 1: I think he's a member of the Big Saddleback Church.
Speaker 1: Last I heard in Mission Viejo. And obviously because of
Speaker 1: his ties in New York when you're when you hit
Speaker 1: a game winning, you know, world series changing home run
Speaker 1: for the New York Yankees, that opens up some doors.
Speaker 1: It opens up a few doors for you in the
Speaker 1: New York metropolitan area. Some guys can they go for that. So, alright,
Speaker 1: we have bah Humbug. Very exciting here, I guess on
Speaker 1: bah Humbug. Now, this is the final weekend for us
Speaker 1: a podcasting unless something crazy as he happens, and we
Speaker 1: have to know there's a chance we might come back
Speaker 1: um right around New Year's and do something probably not,
Speaker 1: probably not. So this our our final weekend of podcasting
Speaker 1: before the long holiday hiatus. And we will be back
Speaker 1: in early January on the radio show, and we'll see
Speaker 1: about the the podcast, and I guess we're gonna continue,
Speaker 1: depending on my schedule. We will continue Benny Versus the Penny,
Speaker 1: so we'll still have that content on Fridays, right, And
Speaker 1: we had two more weeks after this in the regular
Speaker 1: season here and then it's a little depressing, Yeah, do
Speaker 1: you not want to do Benny versus I love Benny
Speaker 1: Versus the Penny. It just it's unfortunate that when it
Speaker 1: comes to a closed football season, I mean that means
Speaker 1: football seasons come to a close. So yeah, I um
Speaker 1: enjoy it. I think that it's great. It's game, great traction,
Speaker 1: and like you said last week, it looks aesthetically appeasing
Speaker 1: now compared to week number one. It only took me
Speaker 1: four months to figure out what the problem was, so
Speaker 1: I'm on top of it. Does not get any better.
Speaker 1: You give me four months or three months. I think
Speaker 1: it was three months, and I will figure figure it out.
Speaker 1: So with that mention of the the ba humbug and
Speaker 1: all that stuff, we'll be back with plenty of unique
Speaker 1: original audio content for you in by the way, free
Speaker 1: of charge. Free. This is free audio content. You know.
Speaker 1: You know, there's no paywall, there's none of that stuff.
Speaker 1: It's all available to you for free. So consider this now.
Speaker 1: Are right of passage usually ritual. It's like the swallows
Speaker 1: returning to Capistrano punk Satani Phil will he see his
Speaker 1: shadow on Groundhog Day? It is a call to action
Speaker 1: for all the brigadier generals, all the active and unactive
Speaker 1: members of the Mallard Militia. You must keep your guard
Speaker 1: up over the next couple of weeks. I will not
Speaker 1: be at my watch post. I will not be the
Speaker 1: watchdog of sports radio. For the next couple of weeks.
Speaker 1: I'll be away and we have to be on guard
Speaker 1: for lazy Christmas New Year's radio. You are my eyes
Speaker 1: and ears. You are my eyes and ears. You must
Speaker 1: report back. It's a very painful period. I'm sure no
Speaker 1: one we work with will do this kind of radio
Speaker 1: because it would be wrong. It would be wrong. But
Speaker 1: it is a time where laziness takes over radio in
Speaker 1: our business, in sports radio. So some of the traditional
Speaker 1: lazy hack holiday topics of conversation for Christmas, it's who's
Speaker 1: been naughty and who's been nice? In sports. That's an
Speaker 1: obvious one. Another one that comes up this time of
Speaker 1: the year is a host will do no show prep
Speaker 1: no preparation for it at all, and say, what do
Speaker 1: you think we should get player X for Christmas? You
Speaker 1: know it could be Patrick Mahomes, Lebron James, Um, Mike Trout.
Speaker 1: Watch them to get player X for Chris. What should
Speaker 1: we get Mike Trout for Christmas? A pitching staff? Um,
Speaker 1: what is your what is your favorite athletes? What do
Speaker 1: you think is under your favorite athletes Christmas? Tree? All right,
Speaker 1: that's one who gets a lump of cold in sports. Uh,
Speaker 1: you know, there's all these lazy things that come up
Speaker 1: at this time of the year, and then spin off
Speaker 1: what we talked about this during Thanksgiving, it's who in
Speaker 1: sports do you invite to Christmas dinner? That's another one.
Speaker 1: And then recently we've seen this pandemic, its own pandemic
Speaker 1: of the Christmas draft, the Christmas draft, um. And then
Speaker 1: you've got like, um, Santa Claus, Reindeer, Christmas Carol's gifts.
Speaker 1: You know what's the first pick? Is it the Christmas tree?
Speaker 1: Is it the stockings? You know? Is the church? You know? Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm oh my god, it's so so over the top.
Speaker 1: So you gotta keep it. You gotta keep an eye
Speaker 1: on those things. And then New Year's there's not as
Speaker 1: many for New Year's, but they are out there. That's
Speaker 1: simple laziness is tell me your sports New Year's resolutions.
Speaker 1: That's always out there, and you know, go you go on.
Speaker 1: We find out also the you could spend this is like, hey,
Speaker 1: who needs to spend Who in sports needs to spend
Speaker 1: more time with their family? Which is code for somebody
Speaker 1: needs to you know, lose their job because they need
Speaker 1: to be fired. And then there's the tell me who
Speaker 1: in sports needs to work out more because they're fat?
Speaker 1: You know those companies those are That's my brief brief
Speaker 1: call to arms as the ears and the eyes of
Speaker 1: the Mallard Militia there to keep an eye out for
Speaker 1: this kind of radio. Now, with you taking a few
Speaker 1: few heart earned days off because of the holidays, yeah,
Speaker 1: will you be brainstorming on different things for because I've
Speaker 1: had some things kind of roam through the mind and
Speaker 1: I know, yeah, yeah, Well I usually take a week
Speaker 1: and do nothing, and then I after that I have
Speaker 1: to write liners because I'm the only one that can
Speaker 1: write those liners apparently for the show. So you know
Speaker 1: those things Eddie says when he comes back. Good radio
Speaker 1: shows change those every month. We change him once a year.
Speaker 1: I'll have to come up with some new liners for
Speaker 1: Eddie to read coming back, and so I'll be working
Speaker 1: on that. That takes a little bit of time because
Speaker 1: you want things to sound unique, and those are gonna
Speaker 1: be on for an entire year unless something crazy happened,
Speaker 1: so we'll have to figure out how that goes. I'll
Speaker 1: do that, and yeah, I'm always trying to think of
Speaker 1: some new original bits to keep the show fresh because
Speaker 1: you don't want things to go stale, because then when
Speaker 1: things go stale, they cancel your ass. And you don't
Speaker 1: want that. You want to always you want to keep
Speaker 1: up with the times, right, you want to keep up
Speaker 1: with the times. And so yeah, we'll we'll look around.
Speaker 1: You just don't want things to become tedious and hum
Speaker 1: drum and and all that. And so when you start
Speaker 1: feeling like you're going to Dolesville, then you you got
Speaker 1: I will tell you though, guests, and this has been
Speaker 1: this last week leading into the to the break. It's
Speaker 1: it's a little tough. You know. I feel like the
Speaker 1: kid right before summer break or the kid before winter break,
Speaker 1: where you're like, man, I gotta, I gotta, I still
Speaker 1: gotta go to school for a couple more days. You know.
Speaker 1: I got your mind starts wandering a little bit about
Speaker 1: about that. So I've tried to battle that as much
Speaker 1: as I can. Yeah, I have a few different ideas
Speaker 1: for oh, you're for you and yeah, because we don't
Speaker 1: stick to sports here on the podcast, No no, And
Speaker 1: I thought once the conclusion of Benny Versus a Penny
Speaker 1: comes at the obviously the end of the season, with
Speaker 1: super Bowl. Um, maybe doing something that's not sticking to
Speaker 1: sports related now. I know with certain shows that you've
Speaker 1: been on in the past, there's kind of like that
Speaker 1: crosstalk where you'd be on on a show and he
Speaker 1: passed the proverbial baton to the nether host for the
Speaker 1: next show. Yeah, that was a tradition. In fact, some
Speaker 1: radio stations that's like the most popular part when they
Speaker 1: do the crossover there. Yeah. So I was thinking maybe
Speaker 1: doing something like that while we're on YouTube and we
Speaker 1: talked about non sports related content, which we kind of
Speaker 1: trade back and forth the a text that we can't
Speaker 1: talk about on air, discussing those things and then crossing
Speaker 1: right over to you going live on radio. Oh, it's
Speaker 1: like before the radio show. Yeah, pre like a pregame show. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean, if there's, uh, there's this is possibility. I'd
Speaker 1: have to look at the and how long it would
Speaker 1: be in that kind of thing, but be open to it.
Speaker 1: That's something to think about. I do know that we're
Speaker 1: we're talking about something for for baseball season with with you,
Speaker 1: myself and Rob Parker. Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to do
Speaker 1: more during that. I'm a baseball guy. I love baseball.
Speaker 1: You know, Rob loves baseball too, so we would be
Speaker 1: good to put something there. Yeah, listen, I hope the economy,
Speaker 1: assuming things do return to somewhat normal, will improve and
Speaker 1: people start getting jobs back, and restaurants will be able
Speaker 1: to open and people can go eat and go to
Speaker 1: ball games, and hopefully that means more opportunities in the
Speaker 1: media business to do some some different things and to
Speaker 1: expand and and all that. So sure, absolutely, yeah, alright,
Speaker 1: we we have a little time. How do we do
Speaker 1: pop quiz? You want a little drop quiz here? All right?
Speaker 1: These are things I found around the internet and just
Speaker 1: have some fun with a lot of holiday ones today,
Speaker 1: a lot of holiday ones because the time of the year. Win,
Speaker 1: but we'll start out with some non holiday ones. On average,
Speaker 1: on average, we do this three hundred days a year.
Speaker 1: What is it, three hundred days? Three hundred days a year, dude, dude, dude, dude.
Speaker 1: Traditionally there's three hundred sixty five days. This year, there's
Speaker 1: three under sixty six. Because it's a leap. Yeah, um work,
Speaker 1: uh no, wake up, grumpy. Oh that's a bad percentage.
Speaker 1: That's a lot. Yeah. Is that just because you didn't
Speaker 1: get enough sleep. Is that the I don't know, it
Speaker 1: doesn't give you the reason. But wow, the math on that.
Speaker 1: Let me let me do some back of the napkin
Speaker 1: math here. So there's three sixty five days in a year,
Speaker 1: and three hundred of them you are grumpy. That is
Speaker 1: eighty two at the time. It could be from a hangover.
Speaker 1: It could be from a breakup, a bad marriage, a
Speaker 1: bad relationship, losing your job, um, gaining too much weight, stress, kids,
Speaker 1: a lot of things. But man, that's a horrible percentage. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that is all right, It is frowned upon. But nearly
Speaker 1: eight of us do this at work. What is it? Belch, belch?
Speaker 1: Use emojis? You're not supposed to use emojis at work? Yes,
Speaker 1: I can't use the smiley emojis. Where would you use
Speaker 1: you mean, like in a group text or like if
Speaker 1: you're working on a team texting about something, Yeah, you
Speaker 1: instead of saying something, you'd put an emoji in there. Wow.
Speaker 1: That is fascinating, though. I know in court cases over
Speaker 1: the last couple of years they've been trying to figure
Speaker 1: out how to bring emojis into that world, the legal world,
Speaker 1: you know, because there's text chains with people committing crimes,
Speaker 1: and they look at the emojis and how do they
Speaker 1: crack the code? Man, It's pretty pretty crazy because people
Speaker 1: can interpret emojis different ways, obviously, right, some people have
Speaker 1: hijack certain emojis for sexual references and other things and whatnot.
Speaker 1: All right. According to a recent study, men start turning
Speaker 1: into their father at age thirty eight. What is the
Speaker 1: number one sign a man is becoming his dad? Um?
Speaker 1: Do do do? Do? The way? The way he grows
Speaker 1: facial hair? No, it's falling asleep in the living room
Speaker 1: on the couch or they were liner. Okay, yeah, I
Speaker 1: can't do that. Can you fall asleep on the couch
Speaker 1: or the recliner? Yeah? Yes, I can't on the weekends
Speaker 1: because I don't get a lot of sleep during the
Speaker 1: podcast and so I don't gotta sleep in general. But
Speaker 1: by the end of the week it gets to Friday
Speaker 1: night and I I I laid down on the couch
Speaker 1: to watch something and I'm snoozing. I am I'm a
Speaker 1: hollering James, that is what I am, all right. A
Speaker 1: new survey asked people to name a skill that their
Speaker 1: father taught them. This was the most common answer among respondents.
Speaker 1: What is driving No, barbecuing a grill barbecue. Did your
Speaker 1: dad teach you how to barbecue? Guess I just picked
Speaker 1: it up and wet. Although he didn't teach me how
Speaker 1: to drive either. Yeah, my mom tried to teach me
Speaker 1: how to drive, but then she hired driving instructor. That
Speaker 1: such a bad driver. Did your dad teach you how
Speaker 1: to barbecue? No, my dad's a terrible barbecue My my dad,
Speaker 1: my pops. Uh, you know. He he believes the only
Speaker 1: way to properly cook a meals in the microwave for
Speaker 1: two minutes and anything more than that. No, And I'm
Speaker 1: telling my I, I tell me, listen, that's that's food
Speaker 1: is gonna taste so much better. Just put it in
Speaker 1: the stove. Which it's just like the microwave said it
Speaker 1: go away, come back, take it out. No, No, it
Speaker 1: takes too long. Takes too long. So yeah, he's not
Speaker 1: the guy. Not the guy to go to al right.
Speaker 1: A new survey says that more than of households have
Speaker 1: one of these but have not used it in at
Speaker 1: least five years. Smoke detector. It's related to the holidays.
Speaker 1: Um um bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum
Speaker 1: bum bum bum bum bum I'd say a fuse box. No,
Speaker 1: it can't be a fuse box, usee box, that would
Speaker 1: be impossible, that that could be the worst answer ever. Know.
Speaker 1: The correct answer is artificial Christmas tree. Ah, it makes
Speaker 1: sense now, I've only I'm new to the Christmas tree game,
Speaker 1: you know, growing being Jewish. My wife is not, and
Speaker 1: so we have a Christmas tree and we get a
Speaker 1: real run, real one every year. But I have seen
Speaker 1: I've been at people's houses that have the fake ones
Speaker 1: when you put it away, putting it back together, and
Speaker 1: it's a pain in the ast. So I could see
Speaker 1: how people would be like, Okay, I just we're gonna
Speaker 1: leave this. We're not. We have it, but we're not.
Speaker 1: Just you're not gonna use it. I was thinking fuse
Speaker 1: box because most houses now are being made with fuse
Speaker 1: boxes inside the house as opposed to outside, water power,
Speaker 1: electrical everything trying to get inside as opposed outside. All right,
Speaker 1: it could. According to a new survey, when it comes
Speaker 1: to the holidays, women are almost twice as likely to
Speaker 1: do this as men. What is it? It's all for
Speaker 1: the ladies? Bake You're so sexist, you're so misogynistic. How
Speaker 1: dare you know? The correct answer is to re gift. Oh,
Speaker 1: re re get. Now that's lazy. The key thing about
Speaker 1: re gifting is you have to make sure that the
Speaker 1: two universes do not collide at any point. Right. You've
Speaker 1: got to make sure the gift you get that you
Speaker 1: give to somebody else is any different dimensions and those
Speaker 1: dimensions will never crossover, or else you are Scott rude.
Speaker 1: But now, what's your take on someone? If you have
Speaker 1: a significant other or relative that asks you what you
Speaker 1: want for Christmas? Do you take that as an insult?
Speaker 1: Or do you take that? Like? Do you appreciate that?
Speaker 1: When I was a kid, I was very enthusiastic about that,
Speaker 1: But I don't really want no. Now I'm like, I
Speaker 1: don't don't get me anything. If you have to ask,
Speaker 1: don't get me anything, you know, just leave me. I
Speaker 1: don't need anything. I'm good you what do you? How
Speaker 1: do you treat? I think more so now it's I
Speaker 1: think it's kind of lazy. Yeah, yeah, but it also though,
Speaker 1: eliminates getting something for someone they don't want, which you
Speaker 1: could say is actually efficient. But if you knew the
Speaker 1: individual then you wouldn't have a problem with that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you might know someone but you don't know if they
Speaker 1: have you know what they have in their house and
Speaker 1: there you know every You don't have inventory. You didn't
Speaker 1: go through everything and do a checklist of what they
Speaker 1: have and what they need. All right. A Pennsylvania man
Speaker 1: has the world record for the largest collection of this
Speaker 1: holiday item. What is it? Wow? This is really strange.
Speaker 1: This one um a rather innocuous item that you don't
Speaker 1: really think about, but as part of the holidays for
Speaker 1: many many people. Missiletell A Christmas tree stand guy collects
Speaker 1: Christmas tree stands. Yeah, that's now, I I wet. They
Speaker 1: have a lot of plastic ones. We got a big
Speaker 1: metal one. That's a good investment. I think last. I
Speaker 1: thing last. All right, if you're average, you're gonna buy
Speaker 1: three of these, three of these over the high today?
Speaker 1: Is what is it? Average? Um? Do do do? Do? Do? Do? Do?
Speaker 1: Do do do do? Three rolls of tape. It's related
Speaker 1: to tape. Three rolls of wrapping paper. Damn, it was
Speaker 1: my first so close, and you didn't say it, so
Speaker 1: I don't know that it was your first. Guess all right.
Speaker 1: According to a new survey single people of single people,
Speaker 1: you're like yourself guest gun nineties. Six percent of single
Speaker 1: people agree that this is a turn on during the holidays.
Speaker 1: Both men and women find this sec seat. What is
Speaker 1: going to church? No ugly sweaters? I can't fucking stand them.
Speaker 1: I guess you're not invited to the ugly sweater party
Speaker 1: next year. Then if you cannot stand them, well, it's nothing.
Speaker 1: There's nothing worse than seeing someone that's ugly wearing ugly sweater. Wow,
Speaker 1: such as West of the four or Old five? Answer
Speaker 1: right there, probably Guscott. We are all God's creatures. We
Speaker 1: are all unique and beautiful in one way or another.
Speaker 1: Maybe on the inside you're beautiful, not theid Yeah, alright.
Speaker 1: A small number of us will hide Christmas presents here?
Speaker 1: Where is it? Not in luggage? In the luggage? Who
Speaker 1: would check? That makes sense? Like, who's going to check
Speaker 1: the luggage unless you're going somewhere alright. New surveys is
Speaker 1: nine of kids will eat this at some point in
Speaker 1: the next month, but only ten percent of adults are
Speaker 1: gonna do it. What is it? Dates? Snow now and
Speaker 1: that big northeaster this week just ravaged many cities with
Speaker 1: snow in the northeast. Sorry uh. This actor was the
Speaker 1: first ever to start in three umber one hit movies
Speaker 1: in a year. That's kind of random, of we'll think
Speaker 1: of the history of Hollywood. This is the first one
Speaker 1: ever to do it. Kirk Douglas, no, believe it or not.
Speaker 1: Jim Carrey, oh ship, all right, Jim Carrey was an
Speaker 1: ace venter, a pet detective. The Mask and Dumb and Dumber.
Speaker 1: Great movies. It's a good year. It's a good year
Speaker 1: for movies. Cameron Diez was actually hot in that movie,
Speaker 1: and she's not normally hot. She looks very skinny. I'll
Speaker 1: say that, did you give her a steak or something
Speaker 1: like that? You know, I I know a steak that
Speaker 1: I can good boy? All right, all right, last one here,
Speaker 1: last one. About one third of dog owners, about one
Speaker 1: third of dog owners say they do this for their
Speaker 1: pet nearly every day. Mm hmm. Brush them. No, something
Speaker 1: that involves our industry, You got me? I don't know.
Speaker 1: All right, turn on the radio to keep them coming
Speaker 1: and they leave the house. Let me turn on the
Speaker 1: little sports radio show, or while you're sleeping, turn on
Speaker 1: the mall show. Interesting. Yeah, I don't think we get
Speaker 1: credit for that. If dogs listen, Unfortunately, we don't get credit.
Speaker 1: But any all right, there is. We'll have the mailbag
Speaker 1: and some other random things that will pop up on
Speaker 1: the Sunday podcast. Don't forget Benny Versus the Penny. I know,
Speaker 1: we got some weird Saturday NFL games this week, so
Speaker 1: it's a little disjointed, but you can fast forward through
Speaker 1: those and check out the Sunday card of Benny Versus
Speaker 1: the Penny breaking down every NFL game against the spread.
Speaker 1: It's the YouTube show and we do that every Friday.
Speaker 1: We plan on doing that even over the Christmas and
Speaker 1: New Year's break, so I get your little little taste,
Speaker 1: a little fix of the Mallard Militia Show and all
Speaker 1: that stuff. So uh, anyway, thank you, have a wonderful,
Speaker 1: wonderful rest of your day. Will catch you next time. Aloha.
Speaker 1: Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Miller
Speaker 1: Show weekdays at two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific.