Speaker 1: You're listening to Comedy Central. Wow, our journey as humans
Speaker 1: is very inspiring, but not to like animals. Like we're like,
Speaker 1: look how far we've come, and every animal on the
Speaker 1: planet is like this mouth because it's the chopped down
Speaker 1: our houses. And they kill us to wear us. Dog,
Speaker 1: they just wear us. What do you mean? Where it
Speaker 1: where us? You know they're gonna take your your back
Speaker 1: and they're gonna put it on their back. But what
Speaker 1: what do they have on their back? Nothing? Clearly you don't.
Speaker 1: They have skin? Nah, they will, they got they've got it,
Speaker 1: but it's like useless. Apparently I don't know what happened
Speaker 1: with their skin, and so they're just gonna wear us.
Speaker 1: These are the conversations animals are having about us till
Speaker 1: this day. Imagine chickens talking to each other. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: know it gives them good dreams. Is like the feathers
Speaker 1: of our ancestors. What, Yeah, they need to sleep on
Speaker 1: our dead bodies for a good night's sleep. What can
Speaker 1: they not make the pillows out of anything? Else? They can?
Speaker 1: They can, but they don't like to. What were the
Speaker 1: other options? Well, they used to use uh cotton that
Speaker 1: some of them had picked. Yeah, Jesus. These people are monsters.
Speaker 1: I know. I know. Anyway, I'll chat you later. I've
Speaker 1: got to go turn into a bucket of pieces that
Speaker 1: they're not going to finish. See Lata. Coming to you
Speaker 1: from the heart of times for in New York City,
Speaker 1: the only city in America. It's The Daily Show. Here's
Speaker 1: a du tonight. Bye bye, Bryan, How Congress is getting rich?
Speaker 1: And Rick Glassman. This is the Daily Show with Trevor Noah. Hey,
Speaker 1: what's going on? Everybody? Welcome to the Daily Show. I'm
Speaker 1: Trevor Noah and joining me for today's headlines is our
Speaker 1: very own Runnie Chang. What's going on? RUnni? How you doing?
Speaker 1: Hey Trevor, good to see you again. Uh well, I'm okay.
Speaker 1: But I got COVID like five weeks ago, and uh wow,
Speaker 1: Yeah it was. It was intense. It felt really sick.
Speaker 1: I'm glad I recovered, but I think I may have
Speaker 1: some lingering headaches, brain fog. And the worst part about
Speaker 1: COVID is, uh afterwards, I look at Machine Gun, Kelly
Speaker 1: and Megan Fox News, and I I just feel nothing
Speaker 1: like you've lost Yeah, I just lost complete interest, like
Speaker 1: I would be scrolling. I'll see them like biting each
Speaker 1: other's tongues or something, and I'll be like, I don't
Speaker 1: care about this, and you know, I just I hope
Speaker 1: in a few months this goes away and I once
Speaker 1: again can enjoy Megan Kelly machine Gun Fox News. You see,
Speaker 1: that's part of the thing. It's happening to you now,
Speaker 1: even mixing up there. Oh did I just mix it up? Damn?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, man, It's all right, you know, cheez running well.
Speaker 1: It could be worse. It could be worse, it could
Speaker 1: be worse. I'm glad you're getting better, and I hope
Speaker 1: that you care about them again one day. Thank you, Roy, Well,
Speaker 1: thanks for being here. All right, let's jump straight into
Speaker 1: today's headlines. We kick things off with major news out
Speaker 1: of the Supreme Court, Yes, the second most powerful court
Speaker 1: in the United States, right off, the judge Judy. Out
Speaker 1: of all the justices on the Supreme Courts, the oldest
Speaker 1: one is Stephen Bria. And you know how it goes
Speaker 1: with old Supreme Court justices. Eventually, whether they like it
Speaker 1: or not, they go and meet the one true judge.
Speaker 1: So Democrats have been relentlessly pestering Brier to step down
Speaker 1: so that they can replace him before Mitch McConnell comes
Speaker 1: back into power and makes a rule that all Supreme
Speaker 1: Court justices have to have been Platinum Q and on
Speaker 1: members in the past. And today Bria finally made the
Speaker 1: Democrats dreams come true. Breaking news a bombshell announcement out
Speaker 1: of the U. S. Supreme Court, reverberating across the nation's
Speaker 1: legal and political landscape. CNN has learned that Justice Stephen
Speaker 1: Bryer plans to retire. Briar is eight three years old,
Speaker 1: and he has resisted calls to retire from liberals who
Speaker 1: want President Joe Biden to have a Supreme Court nomination
Speaker 1: slot that he can use this year. Apparent Brier has
Speaker 1: decided to move forward with that retirement now, and it
Speaker 1: sets up a political battle here for President Biden, who
Speaker 1: will have the opportunity to nominate a Supreme Court justice.
Speaker 1: As a result, Justice Stephen Brier, the leading liberal on
Speaker 1: the Court, he will retire. We're still not exactly sure
Speaker 1: of the timeline, but presumably not until the end of
Speaker 1: this term, which ends up usually at the end of June.
Speaker 1: Is big, y'all. Justice Brian is retiring, Yeah, probably to
Speaker 1: focus more on his ice cream brand. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but honestly, no one, no one should be surprised by
Speaker 1: this news, right. It probably isn't fun being hounded old
Speaker 1: day by people screaming at you to retire. I mean, imagine,
Speaker 1: think about everywhere this guy goes, people are telling him
Speaker 1: he should be retiring. He's probably in line at the
Speaker 1: grocery store and people like, retire bitch. Is it Starbucks?
Speaker 1: The name of the cup is retire bitch. He's at
Speaker 1: the synagogue and the rabbis like, retire bitch. Right now,
Speaker 1: a lot of Democrats are relieved, but I don't know. People.
Speaker 1: I feel like the only win here is gonna be
Speaker 1: Mitch mconnell. Maybe I'm just God, Yeah, because even though
Speaker 1: the Republicans don't control the Senate, don't be shocked, don't
Speaker 1: be shocked, and Mitch still makes it happen. He's just
Speaker 1: gonna come out like March's a long standing shot, a
Speaker 1: tradition that we're kind of confirmed or Supreme Court justice
Speaker 1: in a year where there's no treason of Ozark or
Speaker 1: Netflix Ma, we're all gonna watch it first and then
Speaker 1: proceress what happened. Crazy share As to the speculation about
Speaker 1: who will replace Brian. President Biden has already promised that
Speaker 1: if he gets the chance, he's going to nominate a
Speaker 1: black woman to the Supreme Courts. But you gotta admit,
Speaker 1: that's gonna be a really powerful moment. You know he's
Speaker 1: giving that speech, it's gonna be really special until he
Speaker 1: says that she's the finest Negro judge of the Negro leagues.
Speaker 1: And you know, come on, man, come on man. Well
Speaker 1: you know, Trevor, we're gonna go ratio with the Supreme Court.
Speaker 1: Joice thing. I just want to play out there that
Speaker 1: you know, Americans have a really strong history of jurisprudence
Speaker 1: in America. I mean O. J. Simpson trial, that was
Speaker 1: us man, udgo got you did that stuff? So if
Speaker 1: you like that outcome. Also, I don't know how many
Speaker 1: times I have to say this on the show, but
Speaker 1: I have a law degree. And also I am extremely judging,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. I judge everything, Like when
Speaker 1: I wake up, I'm judging everyone. I'm judging you right now,
Speaker 1: like your suit was that polka dots? That looks like shit.
Speaker 1: I'd be perfect for this role, you know what I'm saying. Also,
Speaker 1: in America, there's only two jobs with lifetime appointments as
Speaker 1: the host of Prices Right and Supreme Court judge, which
Speaker 1: means you can't get fired. Trevor, do you know how
Speaker 1: much ship I would talk if I couldn't get fired? No, no,
Speaker 1: tell me running, I would talk so much Ship. I'm
Speaker 1: so much more free to express myself. And isn't that
Speaker 1: what being America is about? Being free? Yeah? I would
Speaker 1: love to know all the things you have to say
Speaker 1: about me when you're free, I mean considering what you
Speaker 1: say about me when you're held back exactly. So let's
Speaker 1: work to make this happen, Biden, I'm available. I like
Speaker 1: to announce my candidacy for the Supreme Court of the
Speaker 1: United States both for me on Twitter. Thank you, Ronnie.
Speaker 1: And that's a powerful statement. It's not polka dost their
Speaker 1: little like squiggly things. Okay they look like anyway. Let's
Speaker 1: move on to the big entertainment story everyone's talking about today.
Speaker 1: It's about Disney movies, which everyone loves. Right. We all
Speaker 1: love Disney movies, especially the classics. They're the reason that
Speaker 1: we all believe in true love and all hates our stepmothers,
Speaker 1: and Disney loves remaking those films because Disney rarely understands
Speaker 1: the value of money. But as the originals get remade,
Speaker 1: people start to notice things that don't quite work in
Speaker 1: the modern era. As one famous act that just pointed
Speaker 1: out Walt Disney Studios on the defensive following harsh criticism
Speaker 1: by Emmy winning actor Peter Dinklage over the upcoming live
Speaker 1: action adaptation of The Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
Speaker 1: starring West Side Story actress Rachel Zegler, I was a
Speaker 1: little taken back by the very very very very proud
Speaker 1: to cast a Latino actress as snow White. But you're
Speaker 1: still telling the story of snow Snow White. Yeah, seven Dwarves.
Speaker 1: You're progressive in one way, and then but you're still
Speaker 1: making that backward story of seven dwarves living in a cave.
Speaker 1: To get what you're doing, man, Disney releasing a statement
Speaker 1: responding to the backlash, writing, in part to avoid reinforcing
Speaker 1: stereotypes from the original animated film, we are taking a
Speaker 1: different approach with these seven characters and have been consulting
Speaker 1: with members of the dwarf is um community. Oh boy,
Speaker 1: all right, let me start by saying this from the beginning.
Speaker 1: I am not a dwarf. So if Peter Denklige says
Speaker 1: that this is a problem, I'm not going to say
Speaker 1: that he's wrong because I've never watched Snow White and
Speaker 1: found the dwarves offensive. All right, But I do understand
Speaker 1: what he's talking about. I genuinely do, because if that
Speaker 1: movie was called Snow White and the Seven Blacks, I mean,
Speaker 1: that would be weird. And you could tell me, oh, Trevor, no,
Speaker 1: the blacks are actually the heroes. It's still it's it's
Speaker 1: it's a great story. Let me tell you something, yo, man,
Speaker 1: that's still a white lady and her friendly blacks still
Speaker 1: set off my spidy sense. And look, I wish I
Speaker 1: wish Didney the best of luck in this thing. Personally,
Speaker 1: I wouldn't touch the story with a ten foot poll. Yeah,
Speaker 1: because it's still seven dwarves living in the forest. I
Speaker 1: don't think it's a great idea. And that's not even
Speaker 1: the biggest issue of all, because don't forget, the whole
Speaker 1: story revolves around a woman being drugged and then some
Speaker 1: dude comes and kisses her without her consent. And I
Speaker 1: know Bill Cosby is now available for the role, but
Speaker 1: that's not the point. Just saying this thing is uh,
Speaker 1: you know, yeah, Well, look, Trevor, can we just give
Speaker 1: Disney a chance and let's judge the movie after it
Speaker 1: gets made. I mean, the Disney has had a good
Speaker 1: history lately of like updating things and making character three
Speaker 1: dimensional and bad guys good right, Like, look at Cruella
Speaker 1: right from the other one Dalmatians, literally the cruel Devil
Speaker 1: is her name, and she kills puppies and then they
Speaker 1: put em a stone in there. In the prequel it
Speaker 1: turns out some puppies killed her mom. And then you go, o,
Speaker 1: now I know why you were killing puppies in the
Speaker 1: second things. I'm just saying, give him a chance. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Let's talk about Joe Rogan, the King of podcasts and
Speaker 1: Aaron Rodgers personal physician. What do you think about him?
Speaker 1: Rogan is one of the most influential voices in America
Speaker 1: right now because eleven million people listen to his show.
Speaker 1: Eleven million people. Yeah, and some of what they hear
Speaker 1: is a little suspect, right, you know, whether it's misinformation
Speaker 1: about COVID or whatever was happening here. What did call you?
Speaker 1: And mean very white mean and and a mean angry
Speaker 1: white man hilarious. Yeah, you know what I mean at all?
Speaker 1: I am white. Actually that's a lie too, I'm kind
Speaker 1: of tan and he was actually not black and white.
Speaker 1: Thing is so strange because the shades are there's such
Speaker 1: a spectrum of shades of people, unless you're talking to
Speaker 1: someone who is like African from the darkest place where
Speaker 1: they're not wearing any clothes all day and they've developed
Speaker 1: all that melanin to protect themselves from the sun. You know,
Speaker 1: it's even the term black is weird. Ye oh my god,
Speaker 1: I'm not black. I'm not black. Sure, Rogan's red. I'm
Speaker 1: like a caramel mochov frappuccino. This yeah, this change is everything.
Speaker 1: This change. Is that a thing the police said, I'm black?
Speaker 1: But yeah, apparently Joe Rogan really wants to know why
Speaker 1: they say black people if they're not the color of
Speaker 1: a shoppy And this actually is a common question. Yeah.
Speaker 1: In fact, when my brother was five years old, he
Speaker 1: asked me the exact same thing. And I know a
Speaker 1: lot of people who are upset about this, but look
Speaker 1: at the upside. At least Joe Rogan wasn't talking about vaccines,
Speaker 1: so that is a step in the right direction. All right,
Speaker 1: let's acknowledge that. You know what was weird about this
Speaker 1: whole thing was Rogan's guest or Jordan Peterson, saying that
Speaker 1: his skin is actually tan. My man, you're not tan
Speaker 1: like that guy is. That's white. If anyone buys skin
Speaker 1: tanner and they end up looking like Jordan Peterson, they
Speaker 1: should sue the company. Have you seen his skin color?
Speaker 1: Like he could be snow white. The thing that these
Speaker 1: guys seem to be ignoring is that black people didn't
Speaker 1: call themselves black. You understand that, right, not like black
Speaker 1: people like we're black. No. In Africa, we have tribes,
Speaker 1: we have cultures, Zulu, Tassa, Baganda, Igbo, Wakandans. But then
Speaker 1: white people got there and they're like, wow, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of black people here, a lot of black people. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Then in America they invented a rule that if you
Speaker 1: had one drop of black blood in you, that makes
Speaker 1: you black, which defined how you were treated by the
Speaker 1: government and by society. Even vampires wouldn't bite you look
Speaker 1: first for that blood. But I'm applying for a mortgage.
Speaker 1: I can't risk it, you know what, Trevor. I mean, Look,
Speaker 1: Joe is right, man, I gotta agree with him on
Speaker 1: this one. Race is fluid. Like what is race? Like
Speaker 1: one time I put on like a Korean charcoal face
Speaker 1: mask and I felt kind of Asian until I put
Speaker 1: it on and I realized it was black face. And
Speaker 1: then I started thinking, hey, man, I can really emphasize
Speaker 1: with the with the struggle. And then, as I said
Speaker 1: out loud, I got canceled, which maybe feel white, and
Speaker 1: I had to stuff on the bottom of shovis again,
Speaker 1: which made me feel Asians. All right. There, I had
Speaker 1: like five different ratio experiences in the course of like
Speaker 1: ten minutes, all right, And so like what is race?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna chalk this up to the COVID whatever. Man,
Speaker 1: I'm just saying, race is fluid. Man, I feel you there, Ronnie.
Speaker 1: All right, that's it for the headlines. Don't go away
Speaker 1: because when we come back, we're gonna tell you how
Speaker 1: to get rich. You don't want to miss it. Welcome
Speaker 1: back to the Daily Show. Let's talk about Congress. It's
Speaker 1: the number one tourist destination for people trying to hang
Speaker 1: Mike pants. Now you may not know this, but most
Speaker 1: members of Congress are forced to scrape by on am
Speaker 1: easily two hundred thousand dollars a year salary, which, when
Speaker 1: you think about it, is barely enough to afford a
Speaker 1: good prostitute. So naturally they need to supplement their income
Speaker 1: by investing in the stock markets. It's a natural thing,
Speaker 1: but if you can believe it, there's now a new
Speaker 1: move in Congress to stock members from trading stock school together.
Speaker 1: It's rare these days for this divided Congress to agree
Speaker 1: on absolutely anything, but there may be one issue. It
Speaker 1: has the likes of Alexandria Occasio Cortez and Kevin McCarthy
Speaker 1: on the same side. They're both among members of Congress
Speaker 1: pushing for new restrictions on how lawmakers trade stocks. Democratic
Speaker 1: Senator John Ausoff just released a bill tonight that would
Speaker 1: force lawmakers to put their assets into a blind trust
Speaker 1: or pay a fine of their entire salary. GUP Senator
Speaker 1: Josh Holly is working on a version too, and in
Speaker 1: the House there's already a bipartisan bill called the Trust
Speaker 1: in Congress Act. This comes only a few weeks after
Speaker 1: House Speaker Nancy Pelosi doubled down on members right to
Speaker 1: invest in the stock market. Members of Congress me there's
Speaker 1: thousands de band from trading individual stocks while in Congress. No,
Speaker 1: I don't know to this second one. This is a
Speaker 1: free market in people, a free market economy that should
Speaker 1: be able to participate in that. Okay, Well, first of all,
Speaker 1: I can't believe there's an issue that AOC and Kevin
Speaker 1: McCarthy agree on. Those people don't agree on anything except
Speaker 1: that those kids on euphori are way too horny. Don't
Speaker 1: you guys have homeworker. I'm pretty sure you can't put
Speaker 1: cocaine on a college application. And by the way, this bill,
Speaker 1: it's quite a move for a new senator like John
Speaker 1: Assof Think about it. The guy just got to the
Speaker 1: Senate and he's already coming after the wallets of his coworkers.
Speaker 1: It's like showing up to prison on your first day
Speaker 1: and being like, hey, Warden, I think these guys are
Speaker 1: using spoons to dig something. But the question still is
Speaker 1: why do so many representatives from across the political spectrum
Speaker 1: want to ban Congress from trading stocks and why is
Speaker 1: Nancy Pelosi against that? Well, let's find out in another
Speaker 1: installment of If you don't know, Now you know. The
Speaker 1: first thing to know is that historically Congress has had
Speaker 1: no restrictions when it comes to trading stocks. For most
Speaker 1: of American history, inside of trading, laws that affected CEOs
Speaker 1: didn't apply to members of Congress. So if Thomas Edison
Speaker 1: testified behind closed doors sentences, could just call up their
Speaker 1: broker going dump all my shares and candles. That ship's over.
Speaker 1: I tell you you see, they could use all of
Speaker 1: this advanced secret knowledge to make money for themselves, and
Speaker 1: it was illegal for everyone else to do it. But
Speaker 1: for some reason, Congress could. I mean it may have
Speaker 1: something to do with the fact that they were making
Speaker 1: the laws. Who knows. So it's no surprise that members
Speaker 1: of Congress have been really good at timing the stock markets.
Speaker 1: Economists of studying the portfolios of members of Congress and
Speaker 1: find they systematically outperformed the stock market. A study of
Speaker 1: data from the nineties showed senators trades outperformed the market
Speaker 1: by twelve percent per year. That crushes investment guru Warren Buffett,
Speaker 1: who only managed to beat the market by two point
Speaker 1: five percent of that decade. The thousand eight financial crisis
Speaker 1: turned out to be a free for all for insider
Speaker 1: trading on Capitol Hill. According to a Washington Post expose,
Speaker 1: a thirty five members cashed out on information they received
Speaker 1: from meetings with Treasury Secretary Hank Paulson and others. One
Speaker 1: of those attending was Alabama Representative Spencer Bachus. While Congressman
Speaker 1: Bacchus was publicly trying to keep the economy from cratering,
Speaker 1: he was privately betting that it would. Buying option funds
Speaker 1: that would go up in value if the market went down,
Speaker 1: he would make a variety of trades and profit at
Speaker 1: a time when most Americans were losing their shirts. Now, look,
Speaker 1: I know seeing politicians profit off of an economic meltdown
Speaker 1: might make you angry, but don't forget they suffered to
Speaker 1: do you have any idea how heart it is to
Speaker 1: pretend to be sad when you're making bank They had
Speaker 1: to give speeches of fighting the urge to do the
Speaker 1: dougie live on camera, and obviously something fishy is going
Speaker 1: on when members of Congress are doing better in the
Speaker 1: stock market than Warren Buffett. I mean, it definitely makes
Speaker 1: those fun raising emails even more annoying. I need five
Speaker 1: dollars by midnight, bitch, gonna talk to your in trade.
Speaker 1: What are you talking to me for? I mean, I
Speaker 1: don't know. Maybe I'm just jealous. Maybe I'm just jealous
Speaker 1: because members of Congress they get all the coolest secrets.
Speaker 1: You know, which stocks to buy, who the CIA is killing,
Speaker 1: where they're keeping the aliens. Every other workplace has stupid secrets.
Speaker 1: Like my coolest secret right now at the show is
Speaker 1: that our producer Shelley is pregnant and she's going to
Speaker 1: surprise her husband on Valentine's Date four room. But when
Speaker 1: people found out about Congressman making money off of the
Speaker 1: financial crash, there was a big enough outcry that Congress
Speaker 1: was finally shamed into regulating themselves. They passed the Stock Act,
Speaker 1: which banned members of Congress from trading stocks based on
Speaker 1: private information and forced them to publicly disclose all their
Speaker 1: trades within forty five days. But it turns out that
Speaker 1: legislation is like most members of Congress before, bed, completely toothless.
Speaker 1: It is certainly illegal for members of Congress to partake
Speaker 1: in insider trading. UH. Proving that is very difficult. If
Speaker 1: you want to nail them on insider trading, good luck.
Speaker 1: You can essentially say, listen, I was reasonably told by
Speaker 1: my broker I should sell, or I heard similar stuff
Speaker 1: from a third party. D j has yet to successfully
Speaker 1: convict an elected member of Congress based on this law.
Speaker 1: Even if the law is followed, it barely has any teeth.
Speaker 1: Nearly fifty lawmakers, both Republicans and Democrats, and nearly two
Speaker 1: hundred of their staffers have repeatedly violated the Stock Act
Speaker 1: with almost no consequences. You can make tens of millions
Speaker 1: of dollars with privilege information. And what's the penalty for
Speaker 1: failing to report these purchases. It's a joke. It's as
Speaker 1: low as two hundred dollars. Who two hundred dollars is
Speaker 1: the penalty? I mean, look, I'm no math expert, but
Speaker 1: but if I have to pay a two hundred dollar
Speaker 1: fine to make a trade that earns me millions of dollars,
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm coming out head like I'm making
Speaker 1: a thousand dollars in profit. At least, right, two hundred
Speaker 1: dollars is not a penalty, people, That's the chip you
Speaker 1: throw to the dealer after you win the poker tournament. Hell,
Speaker 1: you lose two hundred dollars just carrying the million dollars
Speaker 1: to the bank. So it turns out that the Stock
Speaker 1: Act is just another one of those laws that no
Speaker 1: one enforces, you know, like jaywalking or pushing all the
Speaker 1: buttons in elevator. And don't forget, it's really hard to
Speaker 1: prove inside of trading. You can just say you weren't
Speaker 1: even paying attention during that private briefing that you've got,
Speaker 1: which as a member of Congress is actually a very
Speaker 1: believable alibi. So the Stock Act really did nothing to
Speaker 1: stop inside of trading. Like remember remember how those congressmen
Speaker 1: sold those stocks before the crash in two thousand and eight. Well,
Speaker 1: the same thing happened again a couple of years ago
Speaker 1: before COVID hits. Yeah, multiple Senators dumped their stocks after
Speaker 1: intelligence officials told them in a private briefing that all
Speaker 1: those coughing people in China were about to tank the
Speaker 1: world economy. And still no one got punished, Which is
Speaker 1: why even after the Stock Act, members of Congress continue
Speaker 1: to do so well that some of them have their
Speaker 1: own financial groupies, and no one has more than Nancy Pelosi.
Speaker 1: Some TikTokers are getting stock market ideas by tracking members
Speaker 1: of Congress, and one of their favorites is how Speaker
Speaker 1: Nancy Pelosi. Nancy Pelosi just purchased millions of dollars in
Speaker 1: call options. You've got to see this, shouts out to
Speaker 1: Nancy Pelosi, the stock market's biggest whale. Apparently she's decided
Speaker 1: to go very heavy and text doots. I'm gonna show
Speaker 1: you guys which one she bought. The Queen of Investing
Speaker 1: just spent three hundred thousand dollars on this one stock,
Speaker 1: So I think I'll be picking up a couple of
Speaker 1: shares on Monday. This stock is about to go crazy
Speaker 1: because Nancy Pelosi bought it. Yeah, that's right. Nancy Pelosi
Speaker 1: is a star on TikTok and she didn't need to
Speaker 1: steal any black people's dance moves to do it. That's amazing.
Speaker 1: In fact, I almost respect Pelosi's hustle. She's eighty one
Speaker 1: years old. Most of her friends are probably playing the
Speaker 1: Nickel Schlotz right now, but she knows that it doesn't
Speaker 1: matter if it's casinos or Wall Street, the house always wins. Baby. Now,
Speaker 1: has Pelosi been so successful because of inside information? There's
Speaker 1: no way to know. But what's clear is that just
Speaker 1: being a member of Congress means that you'll probably know
Speaker 1: about the bad stuff that will crash your stock before
Speaker 1: the rest of us. Yeah, whether it's a housing bubble
Speaker 1: or elon musk hoasting SNL and I'm SOI members of
Speaker 1: Congress are banned from trading stocks, Congress will keep having
Speaker 1: an edge over regular people, and it will all be
Speaker 1: completely legal, or at the very least so unenforceable that
Speaker 1: it's legal by default, which you gotta admit, is such
Speaker 1: a smooth way to do corruption. In fact, it's such
Speaker 1: a smooth way that leaders in other parts of the
Speaker 1: world are starting to take notice. Gentleman, welcome to today's listen.
Speaker 1: Say that to your people have given you the secret
Speaker 1: trust of political office. How do you use that trust
Speaker 1: to get rich? I will pass laws that help those
Speaker 1: corporations in exchange for money. No, that is corruption. What
Speaker 1: you do is you buy the stock in the company
Speaker 1: and then you pass the law. But that is also corruption. No,
Speaker 1: that is the free market. Say it with me, free market,
Speaker 1: free marketing, feeling, free markets, free markets. Put it in
Speaker 1: your bonds. Free markets markets could in America. If you
Speaker 1: say the word free markets, you can't do anything. It
Speaker 1: is like their witchcraft. But teacher, what if I get
Speaker 1: caught trending on my inside knowledge? Then you pay the
Speaker 1: pen out? But as the lawmaker, you get to decide
Speaker 1: the penalty. Oh, I'll pay two dollars. The is insultingly low.
Speaker 1: Good job, you know what to do. I have the
Speaker 1: only people, I'll say the children. I would buy stocks
Speaker 1: in unprot You have passed the tests. There's no time
Speaker 1: or no there is all right. When we come back,
Speaker 1: I'll be talking to the hilarious Rick Glassman about a
Speaker 1: show that combines autism and comedy. What stay tuned. Welcome
Speaker 1: back to the Daily Show. My guest tonight's is comedian
Speaker 1: and actor Rick Glassman. He's here to talk about his
Speaker 1: new series that follows a trio of roommates on the
Speaker 1: autism spectrum as they navigate life, work, and pursuing love.
Speaker 1: Oh man, Rick last, We welcome to the Daily Show.
Speaker 1: Thanks for having me. Um. This is a really fun show.
Speaker 1: When people tell you about a show and they go
Speaker 1: this show is going to be about these people, you
Speaker 1: you immediately think a few things. It doesn't matter who
Speaker 1: the people are. So they go like, this is going
Speaker 1: to be a black show. This is going to be
Speaker 1: a show about Africans, This is gonna be show but
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, there's gonna be a show
Speaker 1: about autism and go like, oh, what does that mean?
Speaker 1: And then you watch the show and you go like,
Speaker 1: the people in the show just happened to be dealing
Speaker 1: with autism. It's a show, it's a story. Incidentally, I
Speaker 1: thought our show was going to be a black show
Speaker 1: until it came out. Um, and it's funny that you
Speaker 1: bring that up as an example. Um, yeah, it was.
Speaker 1: It was a pleasure to do this. Uh. I was
Speaker 1: diagnosed with autism five years ago, and when I first
Speaker 1: found out, it was like a superpower. I was so excited.
Speaker 1: All these obstacles that in my life that were unrelated
Speaker 1: patterns kind of started showing themselves and I was like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, this makes so much sense. And I
Speaker 1: and I was reading up on it and I found
Speaker 1: all these tools that I never developed, and I was
Speaker 1: so excited. And as I began to tell my friends,
Speaker 1: some people would be like, yeah, that makes sense, and
Speaker 1: some people would tell me that's how what autism is.
Speaker 1: And I got in a really bad depression for a
Speaker 1: little over a year because this identity that I wanted
Speaker 1: to take on, I didn't understand how to explain that
Speaker 1: makes sense. It makes a lot of sense, That makes
Speaker 1: a lot of sense. I'm learning new tools on how
Speaker 1: to speak to people and I'm figuring stuff out. Incidentally,
Speaker 1: this is my first doing this a late night show
Speaker 1: in an interview. And when I booked the show, I
Speaker 1: was so nervous about this moment because I didn't want
Speaker 1: to be obligated to be a spokesperson about a thing
Speaker 1: that I was still learning about myself. Oh man, that's deep,
Speaker 1: and thank you, that's really deep. No, for real. But
Speaker 1: then I do the show and I had one autistic
Speaker 1: friend before the Showy. I do the show and there's
Speaker 1: a quote that I love. It's Dr Stephen Shorey said,
Speaker 1: if you met one person with autism, it means you
Speaker 1: met one person with autism. I love that quote. I
Speaker 1: love that too because it made me feel like I
Speaker 1: don't have to explain who I am. I could just
Speaker 1: be it and I'm accepted or I'm not. And um.
Speaker 1: What I found is is once I got my diagnosis,
Speaker 1: it did two things for me. Internally. It allowed me
Speaker 1: to better communicate and teach people how to communicate with me.
Speaker 1: I would often say, listen, if you think I'm weird,
Speaker 1: just tell me. I'm not going to pick up on it,
Speaker 1: you know, just if I'm being annoyed, give me the
Speaker 1: benefit of the doubt and just say, Rick, slow it down.
Speaker 1: But did anyone do that? Yeah, you're given that that opportunity.
Speaker 1: It lets them feel safe, so safe that they don't
Speaker 1: even care. Oh yeah he told me about this, It's fine.
Speaker 1: That's really interesting. I wonder if it's because in a way,
Speaker 1: being vulnerable with the person makes them comfortable being vulnerable
Speaker 1: back with you. So, if you feel like somebody's being
Speaker 1: quote unquote weird, it's hard to say that because you
Speaker 1: don't know how you feel. You don't know, you don't
Speaker 1: want to hurt the pressure, you don't want to say
Speaker 1: the thing. There is a vulnerability in coming with telling
Speaker 1: somebody how you feel about how they're making you feel.
Speaker 1: And so if you put yourself in the position where
Speaker 1: you go like, hey, I'm actually the person that has
Speaker 1: an issue, they then go like, oh, they have other issues,
Speaker 1: and then they just go I'm comfortable. Now. What I've
Speaker 1: learned is at least this has helped like myself worth is.
Speaker 1: Like you said, everyone has an issue. But the issue
Speaker 1: if you have a problem with me, isn't the thing
Speaker 1: I'm doing. I mean, if I'm punching you maybe, but
Speaker 1: it's it's it's the one little thing of the of
Speaker 1: the lack of connection. It's the communication. And people don't
Speaker 1: want to say, why are you doing that, They'd rather
Speaker 1: just assume that, like we're trying to be polite and
Speaker 1: that's the light. Yeah, but but we think it's polite.
Speaker 1: That's what I love about the show. You're meeting individuals,
Speaker 1: you're meeting people. You know. The character you play is
Speaker 1: very different to the characters of some of your costmates
Speaker 1: are playing, and you're seeing different spectrums, you're seeing different characters,
Speaker 1: you're seeing different obstacles in life. And that's what I
Speaker 1: love about the show. But most importantly, can I say this,
Speaker 1: it's funny and it's hot warming. People are telling a
Speaker 1: story about people who have to happen to have autism,
Speaker 1: and they have autism in real life. There were characters
Speaker 1: that I met on set because all the neurodiverse characters
Speaker 1: are played by neurodiverse actors. Also, there was one actor
Speaker 1: who has autism that played a neurotypical person. I'm meeting
Speaker 1: most of these people in the character they're playing and
Speaker 1: that's their autism, and then cut and I meet a
Speaker 1: completely different person. And it's it was just so that's
Speaker 1: why I love that quote you meet one person. I
Speaker 1: mean for every person I met on set, I met
Speaker 1: two people with autism, their representation of it, and then
Speaker 1: who they really were. And it made me feel so good.
Speaker 1: And also this is this just happened a few days ago,
Speaker 1: and I almost want to check in, but it's fine,
Speaker 1: we won't say names. But there's a friend of mine
Speaker 1: who was the next girlfriend. Um, well, okay, we have
Speaker 1: time for this. Yeah, go go go ahead. Good. If
Speaker 1: we don't have time, I'll just cut it out. You'll
Speaker 1: leave it. Um, a friend of mine, uh I was
Speaker 1: dating and um, I went to her hometown. This is
Speaker 1: nine years ago, pre diagnosis. And there were a couple
Speaker 1: of obstacles with the mom that I didn't know. We're
Speaker 1: happening all right. Small example is I only had a
Speaker 1: few things to do laundry, and I was gonna do them.
Speaker 1: But that's a waste, I'll she said, I'll do all
Speaker 1: the laundry, and I'd like to do my own. Please
Speaker 1: let me. She was gonna wash it with these purple
Speaker 1: sheets that I knew we'd never been washed before. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, well that sure, because she's been washed before.
Speaker 1: She thinks I'm saying she doesn't know how to do laundry.
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, I'm just trying to save my shorts. A
Speaker 1: lot of things kept happening. Uh. Then there was a
Speaker 1: moment where my my girlfriend at the time was at
Speaker 1: her neighbor, so it was just a mom and me
Speaker 1: and making hot dogs and great, and I took a
Speaker 1: look in the hot dogs or purple, which was odd.
Speaker 1: So I didn't want to ask anything because I've had
Speaker 1: a lot of purple drama already. So I look in
Speaker 1: the garbage to see just how days expired or with brand.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a purple hot dog, fun hot dog. I
Speaker 1: don't know, you gotta ask. And the rappers were under
Speaker 1: some garbage, which made me feel like if she hiding,
Speaker 1: the hiding hiding. So now it expired four years ago,
Speaker 1: the hot dogs expired four years ago, and they're hidden.
Speaker 1: So now I'm h what do I do. I don't
Speaker 1: know how to approach this because I'm recognizing something is
Speaker 1: a little odd from that day, a little yeah. So
Speaker 1: I just said, hey, you know what, I'm not gonna
Speaker 1: eat the hot dog. I don't need to give the details.
Speaker 1: I'm an adult. I get it. I could go around it,
Speaker 1: but she said why So I told her the hot
Speaker 1: dogs are purple, and she said, well, they're fine, and
Speaker 1: I said they expired four years ago, and she said
Speaker 1: they were in the freezer and I said, freezers aren't
Speaker 1: mad Jack, and we're getting in my head. I think
Speaker 1: we're just having a fun debate on hot dogs. And
Speaker 1: she's like, my daughter is gonna marry this guy that's
Speaker 1: nuts about this stuff. Three days ago, my friend calls
Speaker 1: me that her mom called her crying. I'm on episode
Speaker 1: seven of Rick show. I get it. I get it,
Speaker 1: and and this idea of like it lets people in
Speaker 1: on Oh if you just realize that these people are
Speaker 1: not worse, but just say speak a different language, their
Speaker 1: hot dogs are a different color. And it took watching
Speaker 1: a show of me playing someone I'm not for her
Speaker 1: to see who I was nine years ago. And it's
Speaker 1: just like, lets something loose that And this is maybe
Speaker 1: a selfish or corny thing to say, but like, I'm
Speaker 1: part of the show that isn't just making people that
Speaker 1: I've never met be like, oh, good to some representation
Speaker 1: of like the reality of some of this. It happened
Speaker 1: to me and like you needed me to do this
Speaker 1: show As We See It on Amazon Prime streaming now,
Speaker 1: so I had you understand that I didn't want to
Speaker 1: eat a purple hot dog. Rick. This has been fun
Speaker 1: making my day and congratulations on the Thank you very
Speaker 1: much to heavy on my really appreciate you. All episodes
Speaker 1: of As We See It are streaming right now on
Speaker 1: Amazon Prime Video. We're gonna take a quick break, but
Speaker 1: we'll be right back after this. Thank you man, that
Speaker 1: was really a lot of fun. You made my day. Well,
Speaker 1: that's our show for tonight, but before we go, don't
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