WEBVTT - Call It Short & Sweet: Just Order The Steak

0:00:01.000 --> 0:00:04.800
<v Speaker 1>Call It what It Is with Jessica Capshaw and Camille Luddington,

0:00:05.240 --> 0:00:06.720
<v Speaker 1>an iHeartRadio podcast.

0:00:16.640 --> 0:00:20.200
<v Speaker 2>Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello Call It crew, and welcome to

0:00:20.200 --> 0:00:25.560
<v Speaker 2>another episode of Short and Sweet, Sweet Sweet Sweet. Today

0:00:25.600 --> 0:00:31.000
<v Speaker 2>We're we're doing best relationship advice. Uh huh, all this

0:00:31.120 --> 0:00:34.600
<v Speaker 2>is I've had some bad advice too. Yeah, you should

0:00:34.640 --> 0:00:36.600
<v Speaker 2>talk about good and bad advice that you and I

0:00:36.680 --> 0:00:37.320
<v Speaker 2>have both gotten.

0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:40.560
<v Speaker 1>Yes, Oh, I just for some reason, like a lightning

0:00:40.640 --> 0:00:43.559
<v Speaker 1>rod moment, it just like came to my brain, like

0:00:44.479 --> 0:00:47.760
<v Speaker 1>the worst advice when you just said that. Tell me well,

0:00:47.800 --> 0:00:51.400
<v Speaker 1>and I understand why it existed, and I'm sure there's

0:00:51.440 --> 0:00:56.000
<v Speaker 1>some value to it, but remember when it used to

0:00:56.040 --> 0:00:57.800
<v Speaker 1>be well it probably is still my god.

0:00:57.880 --> 0:01:00.400
<v Speaker 2>Wait, I'm just okay. I have a feel you're gonna

0:01:00.760 --> 0:01:01.920
<v Speaker 2>say what I was thinking to.

0:01:01.880 --> 0:01:04.320
<v Speaker 1>You, but go, oh, I don't know. Another's pressure. No,

0:01:04.520 --> 0:01:06.920
<v Speaker 1>just this like hard to get hard to get at,

0:01:07.920 --> 0:01:11.360
<v Speaker 1>like that you're meant to be unavailable and that you're

0:01:11.400 --> 0:01:18.679
<v Speaker 1>meant to manufacture or somehow strategize this unavailability to then

0:01:19.440 --> 0:01:26.520
<v Speaker 1>create more intrigue or like stir up the wanting. I

0:01:26.600 --> 0:01:30.440
<v Speaker 1>just feel like that advice really messed with my head

0:01:30.680 --> 0:01:32.120
<v Speaker 1>when I was dating.

0:01:32.600 --> 0:01:35.160
<v Speaker 2>It's so hard though, because if you're the only one,

0:01:36.080 --> 0:01:39.759
<v Speaker 2>I feel like everyone in their like teens twenties has

0:01:39.800 --> 0:01:44.240
<v Speaker 2>that advice or feels that way. And so then if

0:01:44.280 --> 0:01:47.880
<v Speaker 2>you're the only one not playing the game, yes, then

0:01:48.000 --> 0:01:49.280
<v Speaker 2>that like what does that do?

0:01:50.040 --> 0:01:50.160
<v Speaker 1>Like?

0:01:50.280 --> 0:01:53.880
<v Speaker 2>Do you look desperado? Like if someone waits like five

0:01:53.920 --> 0:01:56.240
<v Speaker 2>hours to write you back and then you text back immediately,

0:01:56.440 --> 0:01:58.480
<v Speaker 2>are you desperate Dan? Oh?

0:01:58.560 --> 0:02:00.840
<v Speaker 1>Good for you. You came up with a differ man's name.

0:02:01.240 --> 0:02:02.559
<v Speaker 1>It's not desperate Bob.

0:02:02.880 --> 0:02:05.639
<v Speaker 2>It's only because the saying is desperate Dan. Oh where's

0:02:05.680 --> 0:02:08.640
<v Speaker 2>that saying? It's like, oh wait, now it's making me

0:02:08.680 --> 0:02:10.840
<v Speaker 2>think that like a desperate Dan and I have my

0:02:10.880 --> 0:02:12.640
<v Speaker 2>brother's name is Dan? Have we just been teasing him

0:02:12.639 --> 0:02:12.919
<v Speaker 2>about that?

0:02:12.960 --> 0:02:13.600
<v Speaker 1>I thought I was a.

0:02:13.480 --> 0:02:15.239
<v Speaker 2>Real it was a worldwide thing.

0:02:17.440 --> 0:02:18.960
<v Speaker 1>I've never heard about desperate Dan.

0:02:19.160 --> 0:02:20.920
<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, no, no, no, no, it's a desperate dad. It's

0:02:20.919 --> 0:02:24.239
<v Speaker 2>a is a comic book character. Yeah, it makes you

0:02:25.200 --> 0:02:27.440
<v Speaker 2>for a second there, I thought we had just invented

0:02:27.480 --> 0:02:33.320
<v Speaker 2>to make fun of my brother, which is completely possible. Yeah,

0:02:33.320 --> 0:02:35.360
<v Speaker 2>you're then a desperate dad and like you're the and

0:02:35.400 --> 0:02:36.920
<v Speaker 2>then they're like wow eager.

0:02:37.919 --> 0:02:41.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, yes, I think I probably was when I

0:02:41.680 --> 0:02:45.840
<v Speaker 1>really liked someone. I probably what I definitely wanted to

0:02:45.840 --> 0:02:46.640
<v Speaker 1>answer right away.

0:02:47.320 --> 0:02:49.959
<v Speaker 2>You want to, Yeah, of course you want to. You're

0:02:50.040 --> 0:02:51.799
<v Speaker 2>so excited.

0:02:52.040 --> 0:02:52.799
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:02:52.880 --> 0:02:55.480
<v Speaker 2>I think the worst piece of advice I ever got

0:02:55.720 --> 0:02:59.480
<v Speaker 2>was to basically, like in the early days, really keep

0:02:59.520 --> 0:03:04.600
<v Speaker 2>up appearance says like there was no like yeah you

0:03:04.639 --> 0:03:07.840
<v Speaker 2>can meet up and like not be all decked out makeup,

0:03:07.840 --> 0:03:10.240
<v Speaker 2>ways on hair, whys like I was a full on

0:03:10.400 --> 0:03:16.360
<v Speaker 2>like call Thos and Tiara, Yeah you're a red carpet ready.

0:03:16.400 --> 0:03:19.160
<v Speaker 2>I was red carpet ready for good, you know, three

0:03:19.240 --> 0:03:22.080
<v Speaker 2>months of dating. It was not a leg out. And

0:03:22.240 --> 0:03:25.200
<v Speaker 2>also I did the whole thing in Bridesmaids where I

0:03:25.280 --> 0:03:27.320
<v Speaker 2>was set out of bed and I did the makeup.

0:03:27.440 --> 0:03:30.400
<v Speaker 1>Why roll out of bed, steak out of bed, make

0:03:30.440 --> 0:03:33.200
<v Speaker 1>sure that you look all the ways, get back in bed,

0:03:33.280 --> 0:03:35.520
<v Speaker 1>be like I just woke up. Yes, yeah, I know.

0:03:35.720 --> 0:03:37.720
<v Speaker 2>I screw that. That's ridiculous.

0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:40.640
<v Speaker 1>I was cute. I didn't feel cute that that part

0:03:40.720 --> 0:03:44.200
<v Speaker 1>of life has been erased from my memory. And just

0:03:44.480 --> 0:03:49.120
<v Speaker 1>like the even the idea of having like how did

0:03:49.200 --> 0:03:51.680
<v Speaker 1>we ever get through any of it? Those early days

0:03:51.680 --> 0:03:53.720
<v Speaker 1>where you still are wanting to make like just the

0:03:53.760 --> 0:03:57.440
<v Speaker 1>most precious impression and never have bad breath or have

0:03:57.520 --> 0:03:58.279
<v Speaker 1>to poop.

0:03:58.440 --> 0:04:03.040
<v Speaker 2>Or yeah, far, I remember being on dates. This is

0:04:03.080 --> 0:04:05.680
<v Speaker 2>so tragic. I'vem being on dates and feeling like I

0:04:05.720 --> 0:04:08.400
<v Speaker 2>should order the salad. I wasn't gonna order this dak

0:04:08.440 --> 0:04:09.240
<v Speaker 2>and mashed potatoes.

0:04:09.400 --> 0:04:09.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

0:04:09.600 --> 0:04:11.520
<v Speaker 2>And also part of it was because, like in case

0:04:11.600 --> 0:04:14.360
<v Speaker 2>later on and you're like in your underwear, I didn't

0:04:14.360 --> 0:04:16.880
<v Speaker 2>want to. I don't want to look full, which is

0:04:17.680 --> 0:04:19.279
<v Speaker 2>so insane.

0:04:20.040 --> 0:04:23.719
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, Well, also I just remember beginning of relationships quick.

0:04:23.839 --> 0:04:27.000
<v Speaker 1>I actually genuinely wasn't very hungry, like I was all

0:04:27.240 --> 0:04:30.760
<v Speaker 1>I was full of full of or full of infatuation,

0:04:30.880 --> 0:04:32.520
<v Speaker 1>I don't know, but I was always like I didn't

0:04:32.600 --> 0:04:35.240
<v Speaker 1>I was not hungry. Does the captains have a tiny

0:04:35.240 --> 0:04:36.960
<v Speaker 1>little tomato? Oh?

0:04:37.040 --> 0:04:39.599
<v Speaker 2>No, I wanted. I wanted the mac and cheese with

0:04:39.720 --> 0:04:43.760
<v Speaker 2>the with all the trimmings. Yeah, but I wasn't gonna

0:04:43.760 --> 0:04:46.000
<v Speaker 2>do it, which is insane because, by the way, who

0:04:46.880 --> 0:04:50.039
<v Speaker 2>cares if in underwear you look like you've had a

0:04:50.080 --> 0:04:52.800
<v Speaker 2>full meal. That's life in my twenties.

0:04:52.880 --> 0:04:57.200
<v Speaker 1>Well, it's our life now. Definitely is our life now?

0:04:58.080 --> 0:05:04.120
<v Speaker 2>Definitely, I'm like, hold the tomato, a.

0:05:04.040 --> 0:05:07.960
<v Speaker 1>Bucket of wings, and then a bikini. I'm with them,

0:05:08.400 --> 0:05:09.000
<v Speaker 1>thank god.

0:05:11.240 --> 0:05:15.200
<v Speaker 2>Okay, best piece of my relationship advice. I had someone

0:05:15.240 --> 0:05:18.360
<v Speaker 2>I was bad in my early twenties with name calling

0:05:19.040 --> 0:05:23.479
<v Speaker 2>and I in fights with my boyfriend. Oh really bad mean,

0:05:24.480 --> 0:05:28.960
<v Speaker 2>oh mean, not like but I would call asshole, you know,

0:05:29.040 --> 0:05:31.560
<v Speaker 2>like I would like go for I would do some

0:05:31.640 --> 0:05:37.840
<v Speaker 2>low blows in my twenties, you know. And I realized

0:05:37.960 --> 0:05:41.440
<v Speaker 2>someone said to me, like, the second you lose respect

0:05:41.440 --> 0:05:43.560
<v Speaker 2>for each other and do that like, there's really no

0:05:43.680 --> 0:05:46.760
<v Speaker 2>coming back some most of the time. And I realized

0:05:47.480 --> 0:05:49.600
<v Speaker 2>that was true. And so when I got into relationship

0:05:49.640 --> 0:05:54.360
<v Speaker 2>with I want, probably Matt, but maybe even the boyfriend

0:05:54.440 --> 0:06:00.400
<v Speaker 2>before Matt, I started to really watch myself. And now

0:06:00.440 --> 0:06:01.720
<v Speaker 2>I'm much way.

0:06:01.520 --> 0:06:03.960
<v Speaker 1>Better at that. You're a real firecracker, aren't you.

0:06:04.800 --> 0:06:06.960
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, I got I had to tone it down.

0:06:09.839 --> 0:06:11.040
<v Speaker 1>You were at like a twelve.

0:06:11.440 --> 0:06:15.680
<v Speaker 2>I was at thirteen, and I.

0:06:15.040 --> 0:06:16.479
<v Speaker 1>Really wanted you at like an eight.

0:06:17.200 --> 0:06:19.320
<v Speaker 2>Even an eight. It was a little feisty.

0:06:21.480 --> 0:06:25.080
<v Speaker 1>I had to really put some water on it. I

0:06:25.120 --> 0:06:27.400
<v Speaker 1>remember being fighting. I remember some feisty times.

0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:31.440
<v Speaker 2>Were you ever like you listen you fucking did you

0:06:31.480 --> 0:06:34.200
<v Speaker 2>ever like do those in fights?

0:06:35.279 --> 0:06:40.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's not a good thing. It's not a good thing.

0:06:40.720 --> 0:06:46.400
<v Speaker 1>I was. It took a lot to get me there,

0:06:47.640 --> 0:06:49.440
<v Speaker 1>but then it was like you kind of wished I'd

0:06:49.640 --> 0:06:51.839
<v Speaker 1>gone there earlier because then it might not be so big.

0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:52.480
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

0:06:52.600 --> 0:06:56.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, So like I should have said I don't really

0:06:57.000 --> 0:06:59.240
<v Speaker 1>love this so much, or hey can you cut that out?

0:06:59.360 --> 0:07:02.599
<v Speaker 1>When I was at like at the eight. Yeah, but

0:07:02.720 --> 0:07:03.960
<v Speaker 1>I waited till I got pushed.

0:07:03.960 --> 0:07:05.279
<v Speaker 2>I waited to the thirteen.

0:07:06.240 --> 0:07:09.680
<v Speaker 1>I think I waited until like twenty nine. Yeah, and

0:07:09.720 --> 0:07:16.880
<v Speaker 1>then I was like, hold my purse, you mother. It

0:07:16.880 --> 0:07:20.960
<v Speaker 1>would be like everything came sized that. I think that

0:07:21.040 --> 0:07:26.520
<v Speaker 1>like the other person would be like, wow, yeah, that's

0:07:26.560 --> 0:07:27.240
<v Speaker 1>good advice.

0:07:27.400 --> 0:07:30.160
<v Speaker 2>That's good advice. The call the crew also has some advice,

0:07:30.920 --> 0:07:31.560
<v Speaker 2>had some advice.

0:07:31.920 --> 0:07:32.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:07:33.000 --> 0:07:34.240
<v Speaker 2>We didn't ask for the bad advice.

0:07:34.320 --> 0:07:36.240
<v Speaker 1>Wait, sorry, wait, one more thing to add to this.

0:07:36.560 --> 0:07:39.000
<v Speaker 1>Only because I think that it's like it's something that

0:07:39.160 --> 0:07:42.239
<v Speaker 1>some either you will easily guess about me or you won't.

0:07:43.000 --> 0:07:46.960
<v Speaker 1>I in middle school you had to take debate in

0:07:47.040 --> 0:07:51.160
<v Speaker 1>seventh grade, and when you take debate, proper debate, you

0:07:51.240 --> 0:07:53.680
<v Speaker 1>have to argue. You don't know which side you're going

0:07:53.760 --> 0:07:57.160
<v Speaker 1>to argue. So every year, like the debate whatever they

0:07:57.200 --> 0:07:59.160
<v Speaker 1>are at the conferences, they have like a topic and

0:07:59.240 --> 0:08:01.840
<v Speaker 1>you research them and then you debate and you have

0:08:01.880 --> 0:08:05.600
<v Speaker 1>to take a position. And I remember that really cut

0:08:05.640 --> 0:08:11.200
<v Speaker 1>my teeth and I became really expert at and I

0:08:11.240 --> 0:08:15.040
<v Speaker 1>loved it. Loved it arguing. And by the way, both sides,

0:08:15.440 --> 0:08:17.080
<v Speaker 1>Oh you could have been a lawyer.

0:08:17.560 --> 0:08:19.120
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think I would have made a

0:08:19.120 --> 0:08:19.559
<v Speaker 2>good lawyer.

0:08:19.920 --> 0:08:22.760
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I just I loved I loved the logic of it.

0:08:22.840 --> 0:08:27.560
<v Speaker 1>I loved I actually also really loved walking my talk here.

0:08:28.320 --> 0:08:30.880
<v Speaker 1>I loved trying to see it from someone else's point

0:08:30.880 --> 0:08:36.120
<v Speaker 1>of view. Right. I found it incredibly hard to argue

0:08:36.200 --> 0:08:39.000
<v Speaker 1>some of the things that I did because they were

0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:43.400
<v Speaker 1>not my opinion, my personal opinion, but having to argue

0:08:43.400 --> 0:08:46.000
<v Speaker 1>them was a really really good exercise and it made

0:08:46.000 --> 0:08:49.080
<v Speaker 1>me understand the other side a lot more. I remember

0:08:49.120 --> 0:08:50.640
<v Speaker 1>one of my you know, one of the first jobs

0:08:50.640 --> 0:08:52.840
<v Speaker 1>I ever the real jobs I ever had, was for

0:08:52.960 --> 0:08:55.640
<v Speaker 1>David Kelly, who's just one of the most genius wordsmiths

0:08:55.640 --> 0:08:58.520
<v Speaker 1>of all time. I've gotten to work for some pretty

0:08:58.559 --> 0:09:04.560
<v Speaker 1>great I announcements and you know, the show. It was

0:09:04.600 --> 0:09:08.280
<v Speaker 1>a law show, and I remember starting an episode and

0:09:08.400 --> 0:09:11.120
<v Speaker 1>there would be a case, and I would almost instantly

0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:13.760
<v Speaker 1>know exactly which side of the case that I know

0:09:13.880 --> 0:09:16.280
<v Speaker 1>agreed with or I was aligned with. And his writing

0:09:16.400 --> 0:09:18.640
<v Speaker 1>was so good that by the end of it I

0:09:18.679 --> 0:09:20.160
<v Speaker 1>would have or by the middle of it, I would

0:09:20.200 --> 0:09:21.719
<v Speaker 1>have switched sides, and by the end of it, I

0:09:21.760 --> 0:09:23.520
<v Speaker 1>would have switched back to where I started. But it

0:09:23.559 --> 0:09:25.160
<v Speaker 1>was just he was so good at it. So I

0:09:25.160 --> 0:09:29.560
<v Speaker 1>think that stuff's really exciting and fun. Prove people wrong,

0:09:29.640 --> 0:09:30.640
<v Speaker 1>is what I'm trying to say.

0:09:30.760 --> 0:09:48.160
<v Speaker 2>Yay, I love that too. Who doesn't love that? Come on, Okay.

0:09:48.280 --> 0:09:50.319
<v Speaker 2>We asked the crew, We're going to go through your

0:09:50.480 --> 0:09:54.600
<v Speaker 2>best relationship advice and share it. Share it with everybody.

0:09:55.040 --> 0:09:58.440
<v Speaker 2>Cheryl said, communication is key, but understanding one another is

0:09:58.480 --> 0:09:59.480
<v Speaker 2>even more important.

0:10:00.240 --> 0:10:05.719
<v Speaker 1>Love it. Yeah, but I don't always understand sometimes. I mean,

0:10:05.720 --> 0:10:08.840
<v Speaker 1>like I can, I can perspective, take, but I but

0:10:08.920 --> 0:10:12.559
<v Speaker 1>I sometimes do go. Yeah, I don't really understand, Like

0:10:12.559 --> 0:10:14.080
<v Speaker 1>I don't understand what it's like to be you in

0:10:14.120 --> 0:10:16.480
<v Speaker 1>this moment and feel the way you do. I could

0:10:16.559 --> 0:10:18.840
<v Speaker 1>respect it, but I might not always understand it.

0:10:19.160 --> 0:10:21.560
<v Speaker 2>I think maybe that's what she's getting it because I

0:10:21.600 --> 0:10:22.280
<v Speaker 2>agree with you too.

0:10:22.360 --> 0:10:25.920
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Sienna said, the best relationship advice I've received is

0:10:25.960 --> 0:10:28.880
<v Speaker 1>to put down all of my issues on paper. Odds

0:10:28.880 --> 0:10:31.280
<v Speaker 1>are they are built differently than what you built them

0:10:31.280 --> 0:10:32.160
<v Speaker 1>in your head to be?

0:10:32.920 --> 0:10:34.880
<v Speaker 2>Mmmm, that's cool.

0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:35.679
<v Speaker 1>Interesting.

0:10:35.800 --> 0:10:41.439
<v Speaker 2>I like that. Uh date your spouse agree? Yes, Jennifer, Yes,

0:10:41.520 --> 0:10:44.000
<v Speaker 2>I like to be wooed. So does Matt like a

0:10:44.000 --> 0:10:44.600
<v Speaker 2>little wooing.

0:10:45.200 --> 0:10:47.880
<v Speaker 1>Lazy said, those who don't put effort in for you

0:10:48.000 --> 0:10:50.920
<v Speaker 1>aren't worth your effort into them. I agree with that.

0:10:51.480 --> 0:10:55.080
<v Speaker 2>I've let them, Hannah. My mom always told me to

0:10:55.120 --> 0:10:57.880
<v Speaker 2>bring a newer guy. I am seeing tour sports event,

0:10:58.040 --> 0:11:01.280
<v Speaker 2>watch a big game and see if he re acts crazy.

0:11:04.679 --> 0:11:05.560
<v Speaker 2>That's a good one.

0:11:06.000 --> 0:11:08.720
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Chico said, the best way to get over someone

0:11:08.840 --> 0:11:10.400
<v Speaker 1>is to get under someone else.

0:11:11.640 --> 0:11:17.560
<v Speaker 2>Chico, I don't agree. I don't agree. Oh do you.

0:11:20.800 --> 0:11:22.959
<v Speaker 1>I'm having to really think back. I think it can

0:11:23.000 --> 0:11:24.719
<v Speaker 1>be a distraction, but no, does it.

0:11:24.960 --> 0:11:27.640
<v Speaker 2>I think sometimes it can make you miss the other person.

0:11:28.040 --> 0:11:30.280
<v Speaker 1>Especially if the one that the new one.

0:11:30.400 --> 0:11:33.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it can make you if they're you know, you're like,

0:11:33.480 --> 0:11:40.440
<v Speaker 2>oh it was gross. Say thank you often, even for

0:11:40.520 --> 0:11:44.120
<v Speaker 2>the little things. Recognizing efforts makes a huge difference. I

0:11:44.520 --> 0:11:50.040
<v Speaker 2>agree with that. Oh my god, it goes a long way.

0:11:50.520 --> 0:11:54.200
<v Speaker 1>Yep. Juliana said, resolve the argument before you both go

0:11:54.280 --> 0:11:57.200
<v Speaker 1>to bed. That's one that people talk about.

0:11:57.360 --> 0:12:02.000
<v Speaker 2>I no, well, sometimes I'm too heated. I know I

0:12:02.040 --> 0:12:03.760
<v Speaker 2>need to go to bed, and it's just not going

0:12:03.800 --> 0:12:05.240
<v Speaker 2>to go anywhere, and I don't need to be there

0:12:05.320 --> 0:12:10.000
<v Speaker 2>until two o'clock in the morning. Yeah, yeah, Emily, the

0:12:10.040 --> 0:12:13.400
<v Speaker 2>best relationship advice I've ever received is that a cheater

0:12:13.520 --> 0:12:21.080
<v Speaker 2>will always be a cheater. I don't agree controversial. I

0:12:21.120 --> 0:12:23.959
<v Speaker 2>say this as someone who's cheated in my twenties. I definitely,

0:12:24.040 --> 0:12:29.800
<v Speaker 2>you know, was not always the best girlfriend. And I

0:12:29.840 --> 0:12:32.960
<v Speaker 2>just so I disagree. I've been with my husband for

0:12:33.040 --> 0:12:36.320
<v Speaker 2>a long time, you guys, and I've been very faithful

0:12:36.360 --> 0:12:40.080
<v Speaker 2>thirteen years. Baby. Yeah, baby, I don't know. When you're young,

0:12:40.120 --> 0:12:43.959
<v Speaker 2>you do stupid stuff. I think if you're an habitual cheater,

0:12:44.080 --> 0:12:47.400
<v Speaker 2>I think if you're cheating in every relationship, then the

0:12:47.640 --> 0:12:50.120
<v Speaker 2>likelihood is is that, I don't know if you can

0:12:50.120 --> 0:12:50.840
<v Speaker 2>turn it around.

0:12:51.120 --> 0:12:54.400
<v Speaker 1>I also think that some people feel comfortable, like maybe

0:12:54.400 --> 0:12:59.560
<v Speaker 1>not even necessarily relationship specific, but you know those people

0:12:59.600 --> 0:13:03.040
<v Speaker 1>that just always cut corners, They always just sort of

0:13:03.160 --> 0:13:05.479
<v Speaker 1>fudge yeah.

0:13:05.160 --> 0:13:08.000
<v Speaker 2>The truth a little yes, why yes?

0:13:08.920 --> 0:13:13.920
<v Speaker 1>And I think that that's like shares some space with cheating.

0:13:15.160 --> 0:13:19.160
<v Speaker 1>There's a comfortability doing things that are not totally honest,

0:13:20.480 --> 0:13:22.360
<v Speaker 1>and I do think that that's something that if you listen.

0:13:22.360 --> 0:13:25.640
<v Speaker 1>I think, if you don't do your work, yeah, then

0:13:25.679 --> 0:13:28.840
<v Speaker 1>that could be something that lasts for quite a while. Agreed,

0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:32.520
<v Speaker 1>yep uh Raley said, if you have to beg for

0:13:32.559 --> 0:13:34.160
<v Speaker 1>their attention, they aren't the one.

0:13:34.240 --> 0:13:40.080
<v Speaker 2>Oh no, we're not begging you guys, No way, Lena said.

0:13:40.080 --> 0:13:43.839
<v Speaker 2>My bestie once said, relationships are like a fart. If

0:13:43.840 --> 0:13:47.360
<v Speaker 2>you're if you have to force it, it's probably shit.

0:13:48.400 --> 0:13:51.439
<v Speaker 1>It gets me every I can't be a part of this.

0:13:53.400 --> 0:13:56.400
<v Speaker 2>I'm I wish you'd read that one. Actually, Jess, we

0:13:56.480 --> 0:14:01.160
<v Speaker 2>know how you feel about parts. I I love that.

0:14:01.440 --> 0:14:04.319
<v Speaker 2>I think it's simple. I think that's simple, and I agree,

0:14:05.200 --> 0:14:06.160
<v Speaker 2>can't force anything.

0:14:07.200 --> 0:14:12.880
<v Speaker 1>Amelia says, no message is a message. I agree that's

0:14:13.000 --> 0:14:14.360
<v Speaker 1>very true.

0:14:14.480 --> 0:14:19.680
<v Speaker 2>Okay, Bridget, don't let friends or family's opinions influence you, Bridget.

0:14:20.280 --> 0:14:25.440
<v Speaker 2>I I've had some friends that have had some blinders on,

0:14:26.920 --> 0:14:30.520
<v Speaker 2>and it gets tricky because you want to help. First off,

0:14:30.560 --> 0:14:34.280
<v Speaker 2>you know what, friends, unless they want advice, don't give it.

0:14:34.800 --> 0:14:39.600
<v Speaker 2>Because I have given unsolicited advice before. In my past, and.

0:14:39.520 --> 0:14:41.720
<v Speaker 1>You don't know if that boyfriend or girlfriend is renting

0:14:41.840 --> 0:14:44.600
<v Speaker 1>or they're they're buying. You know, so you gotta be

0:14:44.840 --> 0:14:46.520
<v Speaker 1>you gotta be mindful.

0:14:48.080 --> 0:14:51.320
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you do, and you know yeah, yeah, it's a

0:14:51.320 --> 0:14:54.440
<v Speaker 2>tricky situation. Although sometimes your friends. The truth is, sometimes

0:14:54.480 --> 0:14:56.720
<v Speaker 2>your friends or families see things that you don't see,

0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:57.640
<v Speaker 2>and that's the truth.

0:14:58.280 --> 0:15:00.920
<v Speaker 1>Uh, Laura says, do you like him or the idea

0:15:01.000 --> 0:15:03.080
<v Speaker 1>of him? This has helped me so many times.

0:15:03.240 --> 0:15:05.840
<v Speaker 2>Oh that's a good one.

0:15:05.880 --> 0:15:07.640
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. It's like, do you like him in real life

0:15:07.720 --> 0:15:08.600
<v Speaker 1>or you like him on paper?

0:15:09.440 --> 0:15:15.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? Yeah, yeah yeah, Larissa, maintain your individuality and keep

0:15:15.160 --> 0:15:20.880
<v Speaker 2>the romance alive. I think it's a death trap when

0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:28.120
<v Speaker 2>you become that person becomes your identity. I've seen it happen, Jess,

0:15:28.160 --> 0:15:31.000
<v Speaker 2>you've seen this happen. Oh for sure. A person's like

0:15:31.200 --> 0:15:33.160
<v Speaker 2>suddenly you're like, who, where'd my friend go?

0:15:33.960 --> 0:15:38.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah? Sucks? Yep, Okay, Michelle has this is a very

0:15:38.440 --> 0:15:41.280
<v Speaker 1>specific one. If there were two steaks on a plate,

0:15:41.560 --> 0:15:43.720
<v Speaker 1>would he take the better one or give it to you?

0:15:45.280 --> 0:15:48.040
<v Speaker 2>That's really I like that. It's kind of like, you know,

0:15:48.120 --> 0:15:49.680
<v Speaker 2>it reminds me of when I said this to Matt

0:15:49.680 --> 0:15:51.440
<v Speaker 2>this morning because he made two cups of coffee. He

0:15:51.480 --> 0:15:53.160
<v Speaker 2>took a sip. He knows how I like my coffee.

0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:54.520
<v Speaker 2>He goes and he gave it to me, and then

0:15:54.520 --> 0:15:56.440
<v Speaker 2>he took a sip of the other one. He goes, wait,

0:15:56.560 --> 0:15:59.000
<v Speaker 2>this one's better, you can have it, and I was like, oh.

0:15:59.040 --> 0:16:00.840
<v Speaker 2>And he does stuff like that'll time, and it reminds

0:16:00.840 --> 0:16:04.320
<v Speaker 2>me of the scene always in the Wedding Singer when

0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:07.200
<v Speaker 2>he doesn't give her the window seat, he gives her

0:16:07.200 --> 0:16:11.000
<v Speaker 2>the aisle seat and she keeps getting her uh arm

0:16:11.080 --> 0:16:13.680
<v Speaker 2>bumped by the cart that goes by. Do remember this

0:16:14.000 --> 0:16:17.160
<v Speaker 2>she talks about, like how if you get yes, he

0:16:17.200 --> 0:16:18.840
<v Speaker 2>takes the best. It's so sweet.

0:16:18.880 --> 0:16:20.200
<v Speaker 1>I'm still on sweet Matt.

0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:22.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he does cute things like that. He gives me

0:16:22.800 --> 0:16:25.160
<v Speaker 2>the better gup of Guffy and I said, no, baby,

0:16:25.920 --> 0:16:30.240
<v Speaker 2>you keep that gup because I love him big. Okay, Tatum, Oh,

0:16:30.280 --> 0:16:32.480
<v Speaker 2>I like this one. If you wouldn't let your daughters

0:16:32.520 --> 0:16:34.040
<v Speaker 2>go through it, don't let yourself.

0:16:34.760 --> 0:16:37.400
<v Speaker 1>Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. I feel like you've

0:16:37.440 --> 0:16:39.480
<v Speaker 1>given me that advice sometimes in a different way where

0:16:39.520 --> 0:16:41.480
<v Speaker 1>you're like, think about baby, Jess.

0:16:41.960 --> 0:16:46.280
<v Speaker 2>I know we've talked about baby Jess. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

0:16:47.040 --> 0:16:48.920
<v Speaker 1>I love that. I think we should end on that one.

0:16:49.080 --> 0:16:53.120
<v Speaker 1>I like caretaking of our little selves, of our smaller selves.

0:16:53.200 --> 0:16:54.760
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because you might not have a daughter yet, you

0:16:54.800 --> 0:16:55.640
<v Speaker 2>might be near twenties.

0:16:55.840 --> 0:16:58.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but just pretend like you did, Pretend like you're

0:16:58.040 --> 0:17:01.000
<v Speaker 1>your own daughter, Pretend like you matter more than anyone

0:17:01.080 --> 0:17:03.560
<v Speaker 1>in the world, and that you want to protect and

0:17:03.920 --> 0:17:05.040
<v Speaker 1>take care of yourself.

0:17:05.280 --> 0:17:08.680
<v Speaker 2>Well, we got out. We've talked about being the cheerleader

0:17:08.720 --> 0:17:11.280
<v Speaker 2>for yourself, your you need to be your your number

0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:12.360
<v Speaker 2>one fan for you.

0:17:12.880 --> 0:17:14.320
<v Speaker 1>Yep, you gotta do it.

0:17:15.560 --> 0:17:16.199
<v Speaker 2>I love this.

0:17:16.400 --> 0:17:17.800
<v Speaker 1>It helps a few of other fans too.

0:17:17.880 --> 0:17:23.680
<v Speaker 2>But yes, yeah, yeah, of course, of course, but sometimes yeah, yeah,

0:17:23.720 --> 0:17:25.920
<v Speaker 2>I love it, you guys, I love all of these.

0:17:26.040 --> 0:17:28.320
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna take some of these best relationship advice. Well,

0:17:28.320 --> 0:17:30.439
<v Speaker 1>I think I'm gonna actually now I'm gonna also. I

0:17:30.480 --> 0:17:32.960
<v Speaker 1>love when we do these and then I hear more

0:17:33.320 --> 0:17:35.639
<v Speaker 1>that next week I'll be like out in the world

0:17:35.640 --> 0:17:38.280
<v Speaker 1>and I'll hear someone relationship advice. I'm like, oh, yeah,

0:17:38.320 --> 0:17:39.360
<v Speaker 1>that's a good one.

0:17:39.280 --> 0:17:41.160
<v Speaker 2>Exactly, and then we can bring it back to the pod.

0:17:41.560 --> 0:17:44.600
<v Speaker 2>All right, everyone, thank you for listening, and we will

0:17:44.600 --> 0:17:55.640
<v Speaker 2>call this the end. Of the episode