1 00:00:01,760 --> 00:00:05,240 Speaker 1: I remember your because it's forever maybe my favorite. So 2 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:07,440 Speaker 1: what would be your last meal? And you were like, 3 00:00:07,880 --> 00:00:10,120 Speaker 1: what beyond the rations that the prison provides? 4 00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:11,000 Speaker 2: Oh? 5 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:13,440 Speaker 3: I thought I was so cool. I thought I was 6 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:17,079 Speaker 3: so funny. Who beyond what the rations the prison provides? 7 00:00:17,400 --> 00:00:21,440 Speaker 1: Just be quicken? It was really that was really good? 8 00:00:21,600 --> 00:00:23,640 Speaker 3: Yeah it was. Yeah, I was trying to be funny. 9 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:25,480 Speaker 3: I think I was trying to be funny the first time. 10 00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:33,839 Speaker 1: Hello, I'm mini driver. I've always loved Proust's questionnaire. It 11 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:38,160 Speaker 1: was originally in nineteenth century parlor game where players would 12 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:41,519 Speaker 1: ask each other thirty five questions aimed at revealing the 13 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:42,880 Speaker 1: other player's true nature. 14 00:00:43,760 --> 00:00:46,880 Speaker 2: In asking different people the same set of questions. 15 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:50,080 Speaker 1: You can make observations about which truths appear to be universal. 16 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:53,080 Speaker 1: And it made me wonder, what if these questions were 17 00:00:53,120 --> 00:00:55,800 Speaker 1: just the jumping off point, what greater depths would be 18 00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 1: revealed if I asked these questions as conversation starters. So 19 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:02,800 Speaker 1: I adapted Pru's questionnaire and I wrote my own seven 20 00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 1: questions that I personally think are pertinent to a person's story. 21 00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:09,640 Speaker 2: They are when and where were you happiest? What is 22 00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:13,160 Speaker 2: the quality you like least about yourself. What relationship, real 23 00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:15,240 Speaker 2: or fictionalized, defines. 24 00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:15,319 Speaker 3: Love for you? 25 00:01:15,840 --> 00:01:19,479 Speaker 2: What question would you most like answered, What person, place, 26 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:22,480 Speaker 2: or experience has shaped you the most? What would be 27 00:01:22,520 --> 00:01:25,120 Speaker 2: your last meal? And can you tell me something in 28 00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 2: your life that's grown out of a personal disaster? And 29 00:01:28,840 --> 00:01:33,320 Speaker 2: I've gathered a group of really remarkable people, ones that 30 00:01:33,400 --> 00:01:35,880 Speaker 2: I am honored and humbled to have had the chance 31 00:01:35,920 --> 00:01:38,520 Speaker 2: to engage with. You may not hear their answers to 32 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:41,920 Speaker 2: all seven of these questions. We've whittled it down to 33 00:01:42,160 --> 00:01:46,320 Speaker 2: which questions felt closest to their experience, or the most surprising, 34 00:01:46,720 --> 00:01:51,160 Speaker 2: or created the most fertile ground to connect. 35 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:56,960 Speaker 1: My guest today on many questions is once again my son, 36 00:01:57,680 --> 00:02:03,720 Speaker 1: Henry Driver. It has it's been amazing to have recorded 37 00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:06,960 Speaker 1: with Henry over the four years that I've done this podcast, 38 00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:11,640 Speaker 1: and to hear him grow up, to hear how his 39 00:02:11,720 --> 00:02:16,120 Speaker 1: answers have changed. And I know he's my son and 40 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:19,960 Speaker 1: that all mothers feel this way about their children, but 41 00:02:20,960 --> 00:02:24,640 Speaker 1: I think it's really interesting, particularly given what children are 42 00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:28,640 Speaker 1: going through and have gone through since COVID, to actually 43 00:02:28,760 --> 00:02:31,519 Speaker 1: keep checking in with their development and where they're at. 44 00:02:32,240 --> 00:02:35,040 Speaker 1: And as you can hear in this interview, my son 45 00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: is extremely candid and explicit about his own journey with 46 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:42,120 Speaker 1: mental health and how it has been for him and 47 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:48,000 Speaker 1: how he faced those challenges. And it was quite shocking. Actually, 48 00:02:48,040 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 1: I didn't know he was going to talk about that. 49 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:54,440 Speaker 1: I really tried to listen and let him talk and 50 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:58,080 Speaker 1: not get emotional. But I think this generation of kids 51 00:02:58,639 --> 00:03:05,240 Speaker 1: has this extraordinary emotional articulation or an emotional EQ, and 52 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:08,639 Speaker 1: they're facing their challenges. They're not hiding them away, they're 53 00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:12,480 Speaker 1: not burying them with tools of distraction, even though those 54 00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:14,720 Speaker 1: are all available, and they do do all of that stuff, 55 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:19,160 Speaker 1: but they're really showing up for who they are. And 56 00:03:19,639 --> 00:03:23,440 Speaker 1: I found it both encouraging and enlightening as a human 57 00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:27,079 Speaker 1: and I felt deeply proud as a mother. I hope 58 00:03:27,120 --> 00:03:30,920 Speaker 1: you really enjoy this third interview with my boy. It 59 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:38,920 Speaker 1: was recorded with lots of love. Where and when were 60 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 1: you happiest? 61 00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:43,040 Speaker 3: Okay? I feel like I have two answers. I have, 62 00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:47,000 Speaker 3: like the real answer that I know is true, and 63 00:03:47,040 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 3: then the answer that you, as my mom, probably want 64 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:51,000 Speaker 3: to hear. 65 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 1: And well played, well played, my son, I have taught you. 66 00:03:56,800 --> 00:04:01,440 Speaker 3: Which I'll say both. I'll start with the one that 67 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:06,600 Speaker 3: I guess that you know is true. I'd say I 68 00:04:06,680 --> 00:04:11,440 Speaker 3: was happiest sitting on the beach in Cornwall with our family. 69 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:15,000 Speaker 3: I think it was before COVID. I think it was 70 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:18,280 Speaker 3: the first time we ever went to Cornwall and just 71 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:24,240 Speaker 3: sitting grilling sausages on the beach, watching the tide, just 72 00:04:24,240 --> 00:04:28,160 Speaker 3: sitting with everyone talking. I must have been like, I 73 00:04:28,160 --> 00:04:29,840 Speaker 3: don't know how old was I on the first time 74 00:04:29,839 --> 00:04:30,640 Speaker 3: we went to Cornwall. 75 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:34,719 Speaker 1: I mean you were probably sex. 76 00:04:34,080 --> 00:04:36,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, I still remember. I still remember it. And I 77 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:39,919 Speaker 3: remember walking along the beach and finding a crystal or 78 00:04:39,960 --> 00:04:43,039 Speaker 3: something something like, like a really beautiful rock. 79 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:46,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, we were turning over rocks and we were splitting 80 00:04:46,520 --> 00:04:49,120 Speaker 1: them in half, and inside were gears. 81 00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:50,920 Speaker 3: I got a really nice one that I really I 82 00:04:51,279 --> 00:04:53,680 Speaker 3: still have it in my room, So I think that 83 00:04:53,839 --> 00:04:57,880 Speaker 3: definitely was what I hope you think is what my 84 00:04:57,960 --> 00:05:02,200 Speaker 3: happiest moment is now. Truly for me, my happiest moment 85 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:07,360 Speaker 3: is sat on my back on my bed watching TV 86 00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:11,839 Speaker 3: by myself, after maybe taking a warm shower, some popcorn 87 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,839 Speaker 3: in my hands. That's truly where I am happiest. 88 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:21,159 Speaker 1: I'm not surprised you're so nice to have offered up 89 00:05:21,240 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: to different answers the pastoral what my mum wants to 90 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:29,360 Speaker 1: hear version, which is embarrassingly accurate. 91 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,320 Speaker 3: I mean, of course, is anyone like I don't know 92 00:05:32,400 --> 00:05:37,640 Speaker 3: if anyone's objectively happiest anywhere. I think it's sort of 93 00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 3: it depends on what you're feeling in that moment. So 94 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,680 Speaker 3: I know that my truth is I'm happiest when I'm 95 00:05:44,839 --> 00:05:48,039 Speaker 3: sat by myself watching house my truth. 96 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,800 Speaker 1: My truth is when I'm on my bed, I'm eating 97 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:52,040 Speaker 1: my popcorn, I'm watching my. 98 00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:56,680 Speaker 3: TV exactly, and I know my dad from work truth exactly. 99 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:58,360 Speaker 1: I will live by it, and I will die. 100 00:05:58,720 --> 00:06:01,800 Speaker 3: That's very true, a man, Thank you very much. 101 00:06:02,880 --> 00:06:05,560 Speaker 1: You know. It's funny, though the more I've asked this question, 102 00:06:05,760 --> 00:06:09,200 Speaker 1: the more I've queried. More people as we've gotten further 103 00:06:09,240 --> 00:06:11,880 Speaker 1: away from COVID and deeper into kind of wherever we 104 00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:17,480 Speaker 1: are now, have queried the notion of happiness being the objective. 105 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:22,119 Speaker 1: Perhaps we're setting ourselves up for real hardship by going 106 00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:26,240 Speaker 1: what's your happiest moment, you know, the pinnacle of your happiness, 107 00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:29,520 Speaker 1: as opposed to that being something that is really transitional. 108 00:06:30,240 --> 00:06:32,760 Speaker 1: It is never an arrival. It's a sort of a 109 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:35,760 Speaker 1: state of being exactly might have things attached to it. 110 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:40,720 Speaker 3: There's no objective happiest because it's so you know, it's 111 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:45,960 Speaker 3: so interpretable. You're always feeling different feelings about where you are. Like, 112 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,920 Speaker 3: even those two answers, neither of them are when I 113 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:53,320 Speaker 3: was happiest. It's just two times that I remember and 114 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 3: I think, wow, I absolutely loved that, and I would 115 00:06:56,480 --> 00:06:59,240 Speaker 3: go back to I would do either of those right now. 116 00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:04,239 Speaker 3: I think when people say, oh, yeah, I'm objectively happiest here, 117 00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:07,600 Speaker 3: that's just a time you're remembering that you were in 118 00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:11,160 Speaker 3: love with just that moment. But I think like we're 119 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 3: always experiencing happiness the moment that you're remembering as you're answering. 120 00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:18,440 Speaker 3: So I think, I don't know, my answer could be 121 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 3: different tomorrow, We'll have to see. I think that's just 122 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 3: kind of I think that's what life is. 123 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 1: I agree. My friend's parents were married for like sixty years, 124 00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:30,520 Speaker 1: and I remember asking my friend's mother. I was like, 125 00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:34,760 Speaker 1: do you think that it was like meant and it 126 00:07:34,840 --> 00:07:39,360 Speaker 1: was all preordained and this moment of love and incandescent love, 127 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,440 Speaker 1: this lasted all this time And she was like she 128 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,640 Speaker 1: was like, no, I think if I met him the 129 00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:46,480 Speaker 1: week before, I probably wouldn't have got out with him, 130 00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:48,240 Speaker 1: And if I met him the week after, I wouldn't 131 00:07:48,240 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 1: have gone out with him either. I would just happen 132 00:07:49,880 --> 00:07:50,920 Speaker 1: to get me at the right moment. 133 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:55,880 Speaker 3: I think that's such a great answer, though, because I 134 00:07:55,920 --> 00:07:58,840 Speaker 3: feel like so many people would be like, yeah, you know, 135 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:02,360 Speaker 3: it was just Yestiny brought us together, and I could 136 00:08:02,360 --> 00:08:04,960 Speaker 3: have met him sixty years ago, I could have met 137 00:08:05,040 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 3: him yesterday. No, you wouldn't have. Let's be honest. It 138 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:12,520 Speaker 3: happened when it happened, and that's just how it went, 139 00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:13,560 Speaker 3: and that's life. 140 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:16,920 Speaker 1: But this is also like how our household runs, which 141 00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:22,200 Speaker 1: is you and Addison have the pragmatic, practical approach to life, 142 00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:24,880 Speaker 1: and I'm always looking for signs, you know, and your 143 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:25,680 Speaker 1: corn flax. 144 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 3: Mercury's in retro grade, guys. 145 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:30,920 Speaker 1: I know, by the way, it is still in retrograde, 146 00:08:30,920 --> 00:08:33,760 Speaker 1: but it's out of retrograde tomorrow. Thank you for listening. 147 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:34,679 Speaker 3: Thanks mom. Great. 148 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,440 Speaker 1: Yeah, what was the thing the other day? I was 149 00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,960 Speaker 1: looking at the state of Henry's room, which is messy 150 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,720 Speaker 1: like most kids' rooms, but not a double virgo. A 151 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:43,640 Speaker 1: double virgo, you would think that things would be lined 152 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:46,000 Speaker 1: up like you were in the army. And I said 153 00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,480 Speaker 1: to him, I was like, god, I can't believe that 154 00:08:48,520 --> 00:08:51,280 Speaker 1: you're a double virgo. And he very slowly looked back 155 00:08:51,280 --> 00:08:53,600 Speaker 1: over his shoulder at me, and he was like, it's 156 00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:58,199 Speaker 1: almost like astrological signs don't mean anything at all. 157 00:08:58,520 --> 00:08:59,559 Speaker 3: It's completely true. 158 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:02,800 Speaker 1: I mean, it's almost like it's all total bull. 159 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,440 Speaker 3: It's fun, you know. Ooh, I was born in September. 160 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:07,559 Speaker 3: I'm going to be clean. 161 00:09:08,320 --> 00:09:10,960 Speaker 1: I won't hear a word against it. You know. 162 00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:13,920 Speaker 3: I'm glad you like it, Mom, But personally, I don't 163 00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:16,840 Speaker 3: think it matters when you're born. It's just who you are. 164 00:09:17,120 --> 00:09:19,760 Speaker 3: So yes, I'm going to be messy. No, I'm not 165 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:20,760 Speaker 3: going to clean my room. 166 00:09:20,960 --> 00:09:25,280 Speaker 1: Wow, all right, Yes, you're going to do your own laundry. 167 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:27,720 Speaker 3: I believe in facts. It's science. 168 00:09:28,559 --> 00:09:34,040 Speaker 1: I believe in science and popcorn exactly, many, my love. 169 00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:37,240 Speaker 1: What quality do you like least about yourself? Now here 170 00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:38,160 Speaker 1: at sixteen? 171 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:44,560 Speaker 3: Ooh, what quality do I like least about myself? I 172 00:09:44,559 --> 00:09:44,959 Speaker 3: don't know. 173 00:09:45,960 --> 00:09:48,160 Speaker 1: You better come up with something because that's question too. 174 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:51,600 Speaker 3: Thanks, Mom. Yeah, put pressure on me. That always makes 175 00:09:51,640 --> 00:09:52,320 Speaker 3: things easier. 176 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 1: You're good at self examination. 177 00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,840 Speaker 3: But I'm going to give multiple answers again, I'm going 178 00:09:57,880 --> 00:10:02,000 Speaker 3: to be pretentious. Yes, yes, I am. On a surface level. 179 00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:06,960 Speaker 3: I think I talk a lot and I think a 180 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:11,359 Speaker 3: lot of the time. I don't make up statistics necessarily. 181 00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:15,360 Speaker 3: I don't like make facts up. But sometimes I'll kind 182 00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:20,240 Speaker 3: of more than over exaggerate something, you know, I'm talking about, 183 00:10:20,280 --> 00:10:22,520 Speaker 3: like how many people in the grocery store. I would 184 00:10:22,559 --> 00:10:25,320 Speaker 3: be like, oh my god, there was fifty people in 185 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:27,400 Speaker 3: the grocery store, and there's there was one hundred of 186 00:10:27,400 --> 00:10:29,040 Speaker 3: them and they all had knives and it was going 187 00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:31,319 Speaker 3: to be terrible, when realistically it was like it was 188 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,520 Speaker 3: like four people and one guy was just budging up 189 00:10:33,559 --> 00:10:36,439 Speaker 3: against me. So I think I have a tendency to 190 00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:41,040 Speaker 3: not lie, but maybe just sort of, you know, to 191 00:10:41,160 --> 00:10:42,480 Speaker 3: dramatize exactly. 192 00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:44,439 Speaker 1: I don't know where you get that from. 193 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:45,160 Speaker 3: I neither do I. 194 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:49,160 Speaker 1: I mean, you could be anywhere. 195 00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 3: I think that when I'm talking to people. I noticed that. 196 00:10:52,080 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 3: I wish I did that less. I feel like it's 197 00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:57,640 Speaker 3: sort of just to make things more interesting. I don't 198 00:10:57,679 --> 00:10:58,600 Speaker 3: know why I do it. 199 00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:01,240 Speaker 1: I wonder what that is that to do with feeling 200 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,920 Speaker 1: like you need to beef up your argument, like as 201 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:06,560 Speaker 1: if people are automatically not going to believe you, so 202 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:09,040 Speaker 1: you have to kind of augment what you're saying with 203 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:11,160 Speaker 1: stuff that is perhaps exaggerated. 204 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:14,320 Speaker 3: I think it sort of depends on what I'm talking about. 205 00:11:14,559 --> 00:11:16,559 Speaker 3: I think if I'm trying to make like a story 206 00:11:16,800 --> 00:11:22,120 Speaker 3: more interesting, I'll exaggerate certain sort of specifics, like. 207 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:24,160 Speaker 1: I'm afraid that's called being an act on mine. 208 00:11:24,880 --> 00:11:27,640 Speaker 3: Being an actor, my darling, my god. 209 00:11:27,800 --> 00:11:30,280 Speaker 1: By the way, it is literally that I do that. 210 00:11:30,559 --> 00:11:34,640 Speaker 3: I also think being my generation, we talk at each 211 00:11:34,679 --> 00:11:36,640 Speaker 3: other and try to convince each other, and a very 212 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:40,120 Speaker 3: stubborn I think I get sucked into that sometimes when 213 00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:42,880 Speaker 3: I'm sort of having a debate with someone, and when 214 00:11:42,880 --> 00:11:45,640 Speaker 3: I get sucked in, I get very passionate about what 215 00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:49,200 Speaker 3: I'm arguing for, and so sometimes I'll just like slip 216 00:11:49,240 --> 00:11:53,760 Speaker 3: out maybe a little maybe something that's not really that true, 217 00:11:54,120 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 3: just slip out a little bit, not a lie, just 218 00:11:56,840 --> 00:12:02,200 Speaker 3: maybe a little a fact that isn't exactly correct, just 219 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:04,120 Speaker 3: to try to make myself more right. 220 00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:07,400 Speaker 1: Oh, that's interesting. 221 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:09,720 Speaker 3: And I noticed myself doing it, and in the moment, 222 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:12,320 Speaker 3: I don't like it, but yeah, I know that it 223 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:14,760 Speaker 3: means I'm going to win the debate. So I don't 224 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:18,040 Speaker 3: correct myself. Oh my god, it's so I wish I 225 00:12:18,080 --> 00:12:20,880 Speaker 3: didn't do that. But I mean, I think that's also 226 00:12:20,920 --> 00:12:23,240 Speaker 3: just kind of being a teenager and wanting to be right. 227 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:25,600 Speaker 1: It's so weird because you can like pull back and 228 00:12:25,640 --> 00:12:28,920 Speaker 1: have a hawk's eye view of like your behavior and go, 229 00:12:29,520 --> 00:12:32,120 Speaker 1: this is definitely teen behavior. I think this is in 230 00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 1: this compartment and then this is where I would like 231 00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:35,840 Speaker 1: to be again. 232 00:12:35,840 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 3: I don't really want to sound pretentious, but it's like, no, 233 00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:44,240 Speaker 3: thank you, mom, thank you for your permission. Right, I think, like, yeah, 234 00:12:44,280 --> 00:12:48,080 Speaker 3: I can definitely see traits that I didn't see when 235 00:12:48,120 --> 00:12:50,640 Speaker 3: I was like ten or eleven that I have now 236 00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:54,480 Speaker 3: that I know have definitely developed as I've gone through 237 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:57,679 Speaker 3: being a teenager. I can see what being a teenager, 238 00:12:57,760 --> 00:12:59,760 Speaker 3: what traits have come up from that? And so I 239 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:02,719 Speaker 3: think having that standpoint, it's interesting. You know. 240 00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:05,440 Speaker 1: What's interesting is and I feel like I talk to 241 00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:08,720 Speaker 1: you about this sometimes that there are still behavioral patterns 242 00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:12,160 Speaker 1: that I have that I can see them almost like 243 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:14,760 Speaker 1: a hole in the road up ahead. I can see 244 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:17,400 Speaker 1: there's the hole that I've fallen into before, and all 245 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:19,440 Speaker 1: I know I'm going to fall in again. The difference 246 00:13:19,440 --> 00:13:24,000 Speaker 1: between having an awareness about something and then actually changing it, 247 00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:28,040 Speaker 1: and sometimes you can stay in that place for a 248 00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:31,880 Speaker 1: really long time. And I guess I wish I had 249 00:13:32,240 --> 00:13:35,559 Speaker 1: had that ability to observe like you have now much earlier, 250 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:37,320 Speaker 1: because I think it would have saved a huge amount 251 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:39,480 Speaker 1: of time. Like this thing that you're identifying now about 252 00:13:39,480 --> 00:13:41,920 Speaker 1: you of like I will sometimes exaggerate because I want 253 00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:45,720 Speaker 1: to be right, Like that's a really honest thing to say, going. 254 00:13:45,640 --> 00:13:47,839 Speaker 3: To change it, I'm not going to we all like. 255 00:13:47,960 --> 00:13:50,120 Speaker 1: That, but like there's going to come a point like 256 00:13:50,200 --> 00:13:52,120 Speaker 1: the fact that you're already identifying as a character that 257 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:55,040 Speaker 1: you're not crazy about in yourself is interesting, Like I 258 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:57,520 Speaker 1: wonder if that will evolve, Like it's already in your awareness, 259 00:13:57,520 --> 00:13:59,320 Speaker 1: so it's more likely that it will. 260 00:14:00,120 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's definitely conversationally and sort of on 261 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:05,920 Speaker 3: a surface level. But then more as a person, I 262 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:09,600 Speaker 3: overthink a lot, and you know that's kind of general. 263 00:14:09,720 --> 00:14:12,720 Speaker 3: Everyone kind of overthinks, but I find myself just sort 264 00:14:12,720 --> 00:14:15,640 Speaker 3: of coming back to the same thoughts of things that 265 00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:19,280 Speaker 3: what if this happens, why is this? What is going 266 00:14:19,280 --> 00:14:22,760 Speaker 3: on there? And I don't necessarily want it to go 267 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:26,600 Speaker 3: because I think that mindset is a curiosity, it's wanting 268 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:29,920 Speaker 3: to know why what's going on. But I think at 269 00:14:29,960 --> 00:14:33,600 Speaker 3: the same time, having that curiosity leads to me, you know, 270 00:14:34,320 --> 00:14:36,960 Speaker 3: being awake at night thinking about what is this? What 271 00:14:37,080 --> 00:14:41,120 Speaker 3: is that? Which I definitely I wish I didn't do that, 272 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:43,800 Speaker 3: but I wouldn't get rid of it because I think 273 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:45,160 Speaker 3: that's just part of who I am. 274 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:47,760 Speaker 1: Do you think a lot of your friends that you're 275 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:50,840 Speaker 1: mate do you think they have this as well? And 276 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,400 Speaker 1: do you think that maybe part of this might stem 277 00:14:53,440 --> 00:14:57,400 Speaker 1: from you a little kids during COVID and this kind 278 00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:00,080 Speaker 1: of cataclysmic thing came in and reshaped I mean, God 279 00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:02,400 Speaker 1: knows that reshaped your life. We moved to another country, 280 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:06,600 Speaker 1: you left everything that you'd known behind. Do you think 281 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:10,120 Speaker 1: that that over examination is indicative of kids that sort 282 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:12,240 Speaker 1: of live through that. Have you noticed that with your friends? 283 00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:14,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think on a certain level I see in 284 00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:17,520 Speaker 3: my friends a lot of my friends overthink. But also 285 00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,000 Speaker 3: I think a lot of my friends are quite like me. 286 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:22,840 Speaker 3: I mean, you've seen from my friends that come over 287 00:15:22,960 --> 00:15:25,800 Speaker 3: We're not exactly completely different people. 288 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:27,520 Speaker 1: You're not, You're very similar. 289 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,960 Speaker 3: So I think with it being because of COVID, I 290 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:36,680 Speaker 3: think just generally, every generation has kind of has their thing. 291 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:41,480 Speaker 3: That's sort of the world. We had COVID before. You know, 292 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:45,560 Speaker 3: people were terrified of the two thousand and eight housing crisis. 293 00:15:45,600 --> 00:15:48,840 Speaker 3: There was the Cold War, Spanish flu It goes back. 294 00:15:49,080 --> 00:15:51,720 Speaker 1: You think generationally, there's always something that's going to keep 295 00:15:51,720 --> 00:15:52,240 Speaker 1: you up on line. 296 00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:56,920 Speaker 3: I think there's always something that is going to create overthinkers. 297 00:15:57,840 --> 00:16:01,240 Speaker 3: I just think now it's possibly on a bigger level 298 00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:04,640 Speaker 3: than it has been before because now we have such 299 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:09,280 Speaker 3: greater access to other people's lives through the Internet. We're 300 00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:10,880 Speaker 3: all overthinking together. 301 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:17,480 Speaker 1: It's like what it's collective, like a collective energetic overthinking. Yeah, 302 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:20,120 Speaker 1: what do you think that creates, Like what does that breed? 303 00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:25,600 Speaker 3: I think with overthinking, especially when there are topics and 304 00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:28,520 Speaker 3: there are events going on in the world that are 305 00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:32,440 Speaker 3: pretty rough, that are very difficult to discuss and very 306 00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,280 Speaker 3: difficult to think about. You know, the war in Ukraine, 307 00:16:35,880 --> 00:16:38,640 Speaker 3: the situation in the Middle East that are pretty frightening. 308 00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:43,800 Speaker 3: I think that can lead to people being afraid, and 309 00:16:43,880 --> 00:16:45,960 Speaker 3: fear is ever a good thing for a lot of 310 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:49,800 Speaker 3: people to be experiencing, because that leads to rash decisions, 311 00:16:49,920 --> 00:16:54,480 Speaker 3: It leads to anarchy of people just not listening to anyone. 312 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,280 Speaker 3: And so I think now that it's such a mass 313 00:16:58,320 --> 00:17:00,480 Speaker 3: of people that are scared and we're all kind of 314 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:04,680 Speaker 3: fueling each other. Yeah, it's this collective fear of what's 315 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:05,679 Speaker 3: going on in the world. 316 00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:08,600 Speaker 1: I was just wondering in your feeling of overthinking and 317 00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:11,879 Speaker 1: of feeing. I agree. I think it's collective. Have you 318 00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:15,000 Speaker 1: figured out any tools that help me unwind that just. 319 00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:18,159 Speaker 3: Sort of help me unwind? I mean everyone has different 320 00:17:18,160 --> 00:17:20,639 Speaker 3: techniques of how they sort of cope with anything, really, 321 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:24,320 Speaker 3: you know, physical stress, mental stress. But for me, it 322 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:27,600 Speaker 3: was really just sort of like knowing that being you know, 323 00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:30,959 Speaker 3: I'm kind of a bit of a nerd and you know, 324 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:36,199 Speaker 3: I like asking Addison about history and whatnot. It's kind 325 00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:38,880 Speaker 3: of knowing that these sort of things they've been present 326 00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:43,040 Speaker 3: throughout history, these events that each time we've said this 327 00:17:43,080 --> 00:17:45,520 Speaker 3: is the end of it all, this is the world over, 328 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:47,440 Speaker 3: everyone's gonna hate each other, and this is going to 329 00:17:47,480 --> 00:17:50,560 Speaker 3: be it and every time people have come through it 330 00:17:50,720 --> 00:17:54,240 Speaker 3: and we've made it to hear. So I think anytime 331 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:57,960 Speaker 3: I do sort of get that existential overthinking about what's happening, 332 00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:02,240 Speaker 3: Why is this happening. Everyone's saying this. I just sort 333 00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:06,960 Speaker 3: of think, like, this isn't some sort of completely unique, 334 00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:13,000 Speaker 3: crazy thing anomally, this is humanity. That we have large 335 00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:17,560 Speaker 3: scale events that are shocking, and this has been hundreds 336 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:23,359 Speaker 3: of hundreds of years, if not thousands of you know, war, violence, atrocities. 337 00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:27,040 Speaker 3: And I'm not saying that that thought is comforting that 338 00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:29,879 Speaker 3: that did happen, that you know, people had to experience that, 339 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:33,320 Speaker 3: But the fact that those things did happen and then 340 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:36,959 Speaker 3: we were able to as a society continue forward and 341 00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:39,800 Speaker 3: keep on going, it's a little comforting in a way 342 00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:41,159 Speaker 3: that we were able to make it. 343 00:18:41,359 --> 00:18:47,639 Speaker 1: Oh, you're very wise, I know, very wise. I just 344 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:50,679 Speaker 1: have this sort of like bumper sticker philosophy. It's like, 345 00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:52,320 Speaker 1: keep calm. 346 00:18:52,040 --> 00:18:52,959 Speaker 3: And carry that's what. 347 00:18:53,040 --> 00:18:58,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly, we observably in the observable history of mankind 348 00:18:58,359 --> 00:18:58,679 Speaker 1: we have. 349 00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:02,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know about whys. I think it's just 350 00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:02,920 Speaker 3: sort of. 351 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:05,600 Speaker 1: I like that though. Hen that's opening the aperture right 352 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,199 Speaker 1: on your perception of something. I'm going, Okay, this this 353 00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:11,239 Speaker 1: microcosm of this fear and this overthinking. Right now, if 354 00:19:11,320 --> 00:19:13,600 Speaker 1: I open the aperture and I look and see that 355 00:19:14,240 --> 00:19:16,560 Speaker 1: people have been going through this for thousands and thousands 356 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:20,040 Speaker 1: of years, and our current situation will also evolve. I 357 00:19:20,080 --> 00:19:21,880 Speaker 1: get caught up in the fear of what the collateral 358 00:19:21,960 --> 00:19:26,000 Speaker 1: damage will be of the terrible things happening. But you know, 359 00:19:26,119 --> 00:19:26,800 Speaker 1: ever were it? 360 00:19:26,840 --> 00:19:29,760 Speaker 3: Thus, I guess, I mean everyone's different. We all have 361 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:34,040 Speaker 3: different ways of dealing with with everything. So for me 362 00:19:34,160 --> 00:19:36,560 Speaker 3: that might work, but then for you may you might 363 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,199 Speaker 3: be thinking, but what if this, and so you're going 364 00:19:39,280 --> 00:19:42,640 Speaker 3: to have to find another way of realizing that we're 365 00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:45,520 Speaker 3: going to be okay? And I mean, I don't know 366 00:19:46,040 --> 00:19:48,240 Speaker 3: real there's no really objective way to talk about it, 367 00:19:48,280 --> 00:19:51,240 Speaker 3: because it is just it's who people are, So there's 368 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:53,520 Speaker 3: no way to say this is right, this is wrong 369 00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:55,959 Speaker 3: on how to deal with sort of like a general 370 00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 3: anxiety for what's going on. But yeah, that's just what 371 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:01,680 Speaker 3: works for me, not convincing myself, but just sort of 372 00:20:01,760 --> 00:20:03,960 Speaker 3: looking at the past and being like, it's gonna be, 373 00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:04,960 Speaker 3: it's gonna be all right. 374 00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:06,040 Speaker 1: It's gonna be okay. 375 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:23,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, my love. 376 00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:29,119 Speaker 1: Now, what relationship, real or fictionalized, defines love for you? 377 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,640 Speaker 3: Okay? I do remember my answer on this one from 378 00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:33,240 Speaker 3: the first one. 379 00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:35,280 Speaker 1: The last time we did this. What was your answer? 380 00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,000 Speaker 3: I was talking about adventure Time. 381 00:20:37,280 --> 00:20:39,840 Speaker 1: Oh, you are talking That's right, you are talking about 382 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:40,960 Speaker 1: adventure Time, talking. 383 00:20:40,800 --> 00:20:44,600 Speaker 3: About Simon and his wife. And I remember that. 384 00:20:44,760 --> 00:20:49,320 Speaker 1: Adventure Time is an amazing cartoon, cartoon animation, a cartoon, 385 00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:52,920 Speaker 1: don't call it a cartoon, is a legendary animated. 386 00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:55,120 Speaker 3: Avunch times legendary. I'm not going to say the same thing. 387 00:20:55,280 --> 00:20:57,360 Speaker 3: I'm going to be different. I'm gonna think of another one. 388 00:20:57,520 --> 00:20:59,880 Speaker 3: I'm going to go for another animation, do it. There's 389 00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:06,000 Speaker 3: a show called Cyberpunk Edge Runners, which is an anime 390 00:21:06,119 --> 00:21:10,920 Speaker 3: that's based off video game called Cyberpunk, and there are 391 00:21:11,440 --> 00:21:15,720 Speaker 3: two characters. One of them is the protagonist, and they 392 00:21:15,760 --> 00:21:20,879 Speaker 3: basically live inside this cyberpunk world of massive towers and 393 00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:26,360 Speaker 3: huge mega corporations and robots and ai and like flying 394 00:21:26,440 --> 00:21:29,800 Speaker 3: cars and everything like that. And so these two characters 395 00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:35,199 Speaker 3: meet and their relationship is really complicated, but they're in 396 00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:39,119 Speaker 3: a relationship together. And I'm not going to spoil the ending, 397 00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:44,120 Speaker 3: but one of them has to sacrifice themselves to not 398 00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:48,000 Speaker 3: only save the other but sort of complete the overarching 399 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:51,720 Speaker 3: theme of the show. And I think just sort of 400 00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:56,040 Speaker 3: the love that was shown between them because it's not 401 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:59,000 Speaker 3: a sort of spoken love. It's not like said oh 402 00:21:59,040 --> 00:22:01,240 Speaker 3: I love you, or to together were like this. They're 403 00:22:01,280 --> 00:22:04,439 Speaker 3: just together regardless of what else is happening in the show. 404 00:22:05,080 --> 00:22:08,200 Speaker 3: They never need to say anything to each other about 405 00:22:08,240 --> 00:22:12,600 Speaker 3: their relationship. You know, it's known, and especially in this show, 406 00:22:12,680 --> 00:22:15,520 Speaker 3: it's pretty hard to picture without having watched it, but 407 00:22:15,680 --> 00:22:20,280 Speaker 3: changes very sort of it's common for them because of 408 00:22:20,520 --> 00:22:24,000 Speaker 3: everything that's going on with the robots and the corporations 409 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:27,520 Speaker 3: and the gangsters and everything in this city. And the 410 00:22:27,560 --> 00:22:31,520 Speaker 3: main character gets these like prosthetics. He sort of starts 411 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:35,280 Speaker 3: replacing his body with machinery, and he starts like bulking 412 00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:38,560 Speaker 3: up with all this machinery. And even through all of this, 413 00:22:39,119 --> 00:22:42,080 Speaker 3: you as the viewer, as you're seeing he's making this 414 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:47,199 Speaker 3: immense change in himself. She's still loving him in the 415 00:22:47,240 --> 00:22:49,320 Speaker 3: same way that she did when they had first met. 416 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:52,680 Speaker 3: And I just think that's like, that's so beautiful. 417 00:22:52,400 --> 00:22:55,800 Speaker 1: That's so interesting. What I would distill from that is 418 00:22:56,720 --> 00:23:02,160 Speaker 1: complicity and consistency, two of the cornerstones of love. For you. 419 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think, first of all, a show is absolutely 420 00:23:04,840 --> 00:23:08,639 Speaker 3: beautiful itself, it's amazing, But I think, yeah, just having 421 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:12,040 Speaker 3: sort of yeah, somebody love you through every change that 422 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:16,919 Speaker 3: we exactly inevitably go through. I think, just exactly like 423 00:23:17,000 --> 00:23:20,840 Speaker 3: the inevitability of change that if someone's not gonna going 424 00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:24,800 Speaker 3: to be with you, regardless of whether you need the confirmation, 425 00:23:25,800 --> 00:23:28,840 Speaker 3: if someone's not going to be with you, that's not love, Like, 426 00:23:29,320 --> 00:23:31,600 Speaker 3: that's not someone that you're gonna you're gonna keep with you. 427 00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:34,760 Speaker 3: So I feel like, yeah, love to me is something 428 00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 3: that it doesn't need to necessarily even be expressed. It's 429 00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:41,040 Speaker 3: just something. It's knowing that that person is there for you. 430 00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,640 Speaker 1: Well, I'm going to stop you there. Tell please mother, 431 00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:48,439 Speaker 1: when you are in a relationship, Yes, you will have 432 00:23:49,359 --> 00:23:52,879 Speaker 1: to tell them that much as it would be wonderful 433 00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:57,719 Speaker 1: if everything were unspoken, Unfortunately so much is spoken. Just 434 00:23:57,720 --> 00:24:00,520 Speaker 1: want to manage your expectations. You more about the real 435 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:01,400 Speaker 1: world love. 436 00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,760 Speaker 3: Yes, Okay, oh god, no, now you're making me seem 437 00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:04,880 Speaker 3: like a real weirdo. Shit. 438 00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:10,240 Speaker 1: I really like that though. I think consistency and complicity 439 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:13,560 Speaker 1: are I think those are really beautiful tenants to have 440 00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:16,560 Speaker 1: as part of one's love. Arsenal if you. 441 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:19,760 Speaker 3: Will, Yeah, real relationships are obviously it's not TV. 442 00:24:20,080 --> 00:24:22,399 Speaker 1: It's never going to be like but you've got it. 443 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,480 Speaker 1: I'm going to sound hugely patronizing, which I will just 444 00:24:25,480 --> 00:24:27,440 Speaker 1: stand by it because I'm going to sound that way 445 00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:32,919 Speaker 1: that being your beginning place of complicity and accommodating someone 446 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,880 Speaker 1: else's change and your own is a really beautiful way 447 00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:39,240 Speaker 1: to begin thinking about relationships. I will stand by that. 448 00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:41,639 Speaker 1: So I think I think it's cool. 449 00:24:41,720 --> 00:24:43,760 Speaker 3: The way I said it. I don't mean like, never 450 00:24:43,920 --> 00:24:46,960 Speaker 3: tell them you love them, never say anything, just make 451 00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:51,159 Speaker 3: them read your mind. Just sort of like obviously having 452 00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:55,720 Speaker 3: all of the relationship love things going on is beautiful, 453 00:24:55,800 --> 00:24:58,280 Speaker 3: but just sort of also having that like at the 454 00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:01,120 Speaker 3: back of your mind, just sort of knowing that they're 455 00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:04,439 Speaker 3: there for you, just like knowing that you know. I 456 00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:06,280 Speaker 3: guess that kind of goes back to my sort of 457 00:25:06,320 --> 00:25:10,520 Speaker 3: like overthinking, sort of just like knowing that you don't 458 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:13,600 Speaker 3: need to worry that they're gonna change their opinion of 459 00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:15,720 Speaker 3: you just because of what you're going through or who 460 00:25:15,760 --> 00:25:18,360 Speaker 3: you are. It's just gonna you know, it's gonna stay, 461 00:25:18,359 --> 00:25:19,440 Speaker 3: it's gonna stay constant. 462 00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:26,640 Speaker 1: So I wish I could remember what your answer was before, 463 00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:30,240 Speaker 1: But what question would you most like answer? 464 00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:34,199 Speaker 3: I feel like like my immediate answer is, like is 465 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:36,520 Speaker 3: everything going to be, Okay, when am I going to die? 466 00:25:36,840 --> 00:25:39,080 Speaker 3: How much money am I gonna have? What's my job 467 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:40,879 Speaker 3: going to be? But then I feel like I have 468 00:25:40,920 --> 00:25:45,199 Speaker 3: a certain level of just sort of again like my overthinkingness. 469 00:25:45,680 --> 00:25:48,200 Speaker 3: I think I'd just be like constantly thinking about that 470 00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:51,520 Speaker 3: one thing and how I'm going to get there. Absolutely so, 471 00:25:51,560 --> 00:25:53,120 Speaker 3: I think I don't know if I could have that. 472 00:25:53,240 --> 00:25:55,480 Speaker 3: I think that would mess with me more than it 473 00:25:55,480 --> 00:25:58,040 Speaker 3: would help me in a certain way. 474 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:02,919 Speaker 1: I think, Oh, there's a great I think i've quoted 475 00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:06,359 Speaker 1: it before. I know I have. It's a realka quote. 476 00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:10,080 Speaker 1: The point is to live everything, live the questions now. 477 00:26:10,680 --> 00:26:14,760 Speaker 1: Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along 478 00:26:14,840 --> 00:26:19,480 Speaker 1: some distant day into the answer. Wow, that's pretty good. 479 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:22,480 Speaker 3: That's really. 480 00:26:25,520 --> 00:26:35,640 Speaker 1: You're slagging off the great German poet. I guess, hmm, 481 00:26:36,880 --> 00:26:39,720 Speaker 1: I think that is actually right. It's not about knowing, 482 00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:40,480 Speaker 1: it's about living. 483 00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:42,320 Speaker 3: That's beautiful. 484 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:50,720 Speaker 1: I mean, Darling. I like that answer, which is essentially 485 00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:53,280 Speaker 1: I don't want to know. I don't want to think about. 486 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:54,160 Speaker 1: Just get on a liver. 487 00:26:54,280 --> 00:26:57,959 Speaker 3: I guess probably, like what would World War Z two 488 00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,080 Speaker 3: have looked like if it had come out? I know 489 00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:03,560 Speaker 3: something about like a movie. I would really like to know. 490 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:11,280 Speaker 1: That what person, place, or experience most altered your life. 491 00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:13,960 Speaker 3: How personal should I go here? I don't really know. 492 00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:15,680 Speaker 3: I don't do many podcasts. 493 00:27:15,960 --> 00:27:18,480 Speaker 1: You do not have to get super super personal. You 494 00:27:18,560 --> 00:27:21,600 Speaker 1: can if you want to, but you can create the boundaries. 495 00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:23,679 Speaker 3: All right. You know, I'm gonna keep it vague, but 496 00:27:23,680 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 3: I'm gonna say what first came into my mind. I 497 00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:28,560 Speaker 3: think it was about probably about a year ago now. 498 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:31,439 Speaker 3: I went to my friend's house, who lives in the 499 00:27:31,480 --> 00:27:34,720 Speaker 3: middle of nowhere in England, in a place called the Cotswalds. 500 00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,040 Speaker 3: It's not in the middle of nowhere, but it's pretty 501 00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:41,440 Speaker 3: out of the way of anything. And I went. 502 00:27:41,320 --> 00:27:42,320 Speaker 1: There and. 503 00:27:43,720 --> 00:27:46,840 Speaker 3: At night it was just it was a really freaky place. 504 00:27:46,920 --> 00:27:50,000 Speaker 3: To be honest, No offense to him, he's a great guy, 505 00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:54,440 Speaker 3: love him, but the Cotswolds as sort of a place 506 00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:56,480 Speaker 3: I don't like how sort of out of the way 507 00:27:56,480 --> 00:27:58,879 Speaker 3: it is. I don't really like how far away I 508 00:27:58,920 --> 00:28:01,960 Speaker 3: am from life or like a bigger city. That's just 509 00:28:02,040 --> 00:28:04,800 Speaker 3: me as a person, And so I began to get 510 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:07,680 Speaker 3: a little you know, my overthinking it all. It kind 511 00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:09,920 Speaker 3: of just comes back to that again, that sort of 512 00:28:10,000 --> 00:28:12,840 Speaker 3: anxiety being in a weird place that I really like. 513 00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 3: It was just like an anxiety. It overcame me, basically, 514 00:28:19,040 --> 00:28:21,960 Speaker 3: and it was really strange because it had never happened 515 00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:25,440 Speaker 3: to me before. It was just like this crippling anxiety 516 00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:29,000 Speaker 3: of thinking. It sort of transformed into thinking about more 517 00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:31,040 Speaker 3: existential questions and things. 518 00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:35,200 Speaker 1: I think anxiety does that it attaches to other events 519 00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:38,000 Speaker 1: or thoughts exactly, so it becomes a giant snowball. 520 00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:42,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was really sort of overcoming. And that lasted 521 00:28:43,240 --> 00:28:46,760 Speaker 3: the whole weekend. It was an exy at for my school, 522 00:28:46,840 --> 00:28:49,320 Speaker 3: so we had like four days. It was a longer break, 523 00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:51,840 Speaker 3: and it was that whole weekend, and it sort of 524 00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:55,160 Speaker 3: lasted for I want to say, like a month and 525 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,400 Speaker 3: a bit after that of sort of being in that 526 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:03,120 Speaker 3: really anxious, rough kind of place. And I think I'm 527 00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:06,120 Speaker 3: not entirely sure how I coped with it. I think 528 00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:08,760 Speaker 3: I definitely had some help from the people around me, 529 00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:14,520 Speaker 3: but I think sort of beyond the physical of what 530 00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:17,200 Speaker 3: was actually surrounding me, of what was going on that 531 00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:19,280 Speaker 3: helped me sort of come out of this place. I 532 00:29:19,320 --> 00:29:21,320 Speaker 3: think I had to just like think more. I had 533 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:23,959 Speaker 3: to think about myself. I had to think why am 534 00:29:24,000 --> 00:29:26,040 Speaker 3: I thinking this? And I had to come to terms 535 00:29:26,080 --> 00:29:29,360 Speaker 3: with this sort of anxiety and realizing that it is 536 00:29:29,440 --> 00:29:32,120 Speaker 3: going to be okay. And I think that technique that 537 00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:34,719 Speaker 3: I set of thinking back to like back to history, 538 00:29:35,000 --> 00:29:37,880 Speaker 3: sort of thinking back in my own life when times 539 00:29:37,880 --> 00:29:40,000 Speaker 3: have sort of been a little I was sadder, I 540 00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,200 Speaker 3: was down, and seen that I came out of those 541 00:29:42,640 --> 00:29:44,600 Speaker 3: I think that really helped me sort of come out 542 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:48,240 Speaker 3: of it and almost changed just how I looked at 543 00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:50,160 Speaker 3: how I looked at myself and how I looked at 544 00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:53,840 Speaker 3: my mental health. It's like such a vlogger down. 545 00:29:53,960 --> 00:29:57,160 Speaker 1: You don't you do not? I know these have become words. 546 00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:59,400 Speaker 1: We talk a lot about mental health now, but because 547 00:29:59,440 --> 00:30:01,520 Speaker 1: we never too at it, for example, when I was 548 00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:04,760 Speaker 1: your age. Yeah but tell me because it's been from 549 00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:07,160 Speaker 1: one of the most sort of traumatic moment, like to 550 00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:09,560 Speaker 1: watch you go through that was one of the hardest 551 00:30:09,560 --> 00:30:14,160 Speaker 1: things I've ever ever been through. But the way that 552 00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:18,160 Speaker 1: you have come out of that, the bounce has been 553 00:30:18,320 --> 00:30:22,240 Speaker 1: so extraordinary. It's not that you are so much better, 554 00:30:22,360 --> 00:30:26,800 Speaker 1: but you have this kind of ebulliance and this embracing 555 00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:31,280 Speaker 1: of life and this lack of fear around these things 556 00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:33,520 Speaker 1: that can show up, these scary things that can show 557 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:37,200 Speaker 1: up in our lives. It feels like you greet all 558 00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:42,160 Speaker 1: of it with an enthusiasm, good, bad, and indifferent because 559 00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:44,800 Speaker 1: you've been through this very, very difficult thing. And in 560 00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:47,160 Speaker 1: a way, I've always believed that you can only really 561 00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:49,800 Speaker 1: see it when you're feeling better, but that those hard 562 00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:52,440 Speaker 1: moments have huge gifts in them. 563 00:30:52,600 --> 00:30:55,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it was difficult sort of realizing that 564 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,720 Speaker 3: it was a gift in the moment. That first week, 565 00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:03,000 Speaker 3: right after I had gone to the Cotswolds, I had 566 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:06,920 Speaker 3: an acting class with one of my teachers, whose name 567 00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:10,960 Speaker 3: is Paul, and he just gave me some really amazing 568 00:31:11,000 --> 00:31:15,400 Speaker 3: advice of I went through the same thing, and it's 569 00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:19,680 Speaker 3: a journey and it sucks some really hard ass and 570 00:31:19,720 --> 00:31:22,600 Speaker 3: I'm not gonna lie, Henry. I can't tell you how 571 00:31:22,640 --> 00:31:24,960 Speaker 3: long it's gonna last. I can't tell you where it's 572 00:31:25,000 --> 00:31:28,960 Speaker 3: gonna go, but it is a part of life, and 573 00:31:29,040 --> 00:31:30,959 Speaker 3: you're gonna be okay, and you're gonna grow from this. 574 00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:34,600 Speaker 3: And I think, just like hearing those words, it was 575 00:31:34,600 --> 00:31:37,240 Speaker 3: like someone telling me it's gonna be okay without telling 576 00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:40,480 Speaker 3: me it's gonna be okay. It sort of just kicked 577 00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:43,680 Speaker 3: start of my mind into thinking like, I'm not in 578 00:31:43,720 --> 00:31:46,640 Speaker 3: a good place right now, but I'm gonna be in 579 00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:50,080 Speaker 3: a better place than i was before because of this, 580 00:31:50,560 --> 00:31:53,200 Speaker 3: and just thinking of it in that way, even though 581 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:57,880 Speaker 3: it was still fucking a really sorry, I shouldn't be swearing, honey. 582 00:31:57,880 --> 00:31:59,200 Speaker 1: I think if ever there were a time to swear, 583 00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:01,920 Speaker 1: it's when you talking about what you went through it. 584 00:32:02,160 --> 00:32:04,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was a real pain, and I think just 585 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:07,840 Speaker 3: having someone having someone tell you that it's not for nothing, 586 00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:09,600 Speaker 3: having someone tell you that there's going. 587 00:32:09,560 --> 00:32:12,240 Speaker 1: To be well, that's good, it's not for nothing. 588 00:32:12,760 --> 00:32:15,479 Speaker 3: Yeah, that reassurance, because yeah, I think the biggest thing 589 00:32:15,520 --> 00:32:19,040 Speaker 3: at the time, especially since it was sort of an 590 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:23,880 Speaker 3: anxiety driven moment for me. God, I really do sound 591 00:32:23,920 --> 00:32:25,520 Speaker 3: like a blogger sort of. 592 00:32:26,160 --> 00:32:29,400 Speaker 1: You know a blogger, is it that you're all encompassing 593 00:32:29,800 --> 00:32:31,720 Speaker 1: for whatever it is you think you're doing. It's a 594 00:32:31,800 --> 00:32:35,200 Speaker 1: great collective, such a blogger. 595 00:32:36,360 --> 00:32:38,040 Speaker 3: But yeah, I just think having that sort of that 596 00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:42,040 Speaker 3: reassurance that it's not all for nothing, that this is 597 00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:43,440 Speaker 3: all it's going to happen, and then it's going to 598 00:32:43,480 --> 00:32:46,400 Speaker 3: go back to life and it could happen again. Thinking 599 00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:49,120 Speaker 3: that this is sort of part of me becoming a person, 600 00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:51,320 Speaker 3: just sort of building who you are. 601 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:54,680 Speaker 1: Absolutely there's no getting out of it, Like everybody has 602 00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:56,280 Speaker 1: got there something everybody. 603 00:32:56,520 --> 00:32:59,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, even though I knew that he didn't know exactly 604 00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:01,200 Speaker 3: what I was going through, He didn't know exactly what 605 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:03,400 Speaker 3: I was talking about. He might not even even gone 606 00:33:03,400 --> 00:33:06,240 Speaker 3: through a similar thing himself. But just sort of hearing 607 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,920 Speaker 3: that you know, it is just part of life, and 608 00:33:08,960 --> 00:33:11,840 Speaker 3: that it's not for nothing, it's creating who you are. 609 00:33:12,240 --> 00:33:17,600 Speaker 3: That was so instrumental in me of just getting out 610 00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:20,720 Speaker 3: of that place. Everyone has those moments in their lives 611 00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:24,280 Speaker 3: when they're really just sort of like, God, this isn't 612 00:33:24,320 --> 00:33:28,760 Speaker 3: going good right now. And obviously that varies from person 613 00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:33,240 Speaker 3: to person how difficult the situation is, their response and everything, 614 00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:38,880 Speaker 3: but everyone goes through these trials and so just learning 615 00:33:38,920 --> 00:33:40,960 Speaker 3: how to respond, I think, yeah, that was a big 616 00:33:41,000 --> 00:33:44,239 Speaker 3: part of kind of growing up for me. Obviously I'm 617 00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,720 Speaker 3: acting like I'm forty, I'm not. I'm sixteen. 618 00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:50,479 Speaker 1: But you know, listen, the fact that you're using words 619 00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:54,760 Speaker 1: like respond rather than react you do constantly amaze me 620 00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:57,440 Speaker 1: and I will forever be. In Paul's debt, he is 621 00:33:57,440 --> 00:34:00,400 Speaker 1: an amazing teacher Paul. Yeah, and those of us lucky 622 00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:04,080 Speaker 1: enough to have great teachers. No, like it's that kind 623 00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:08,839 Speaker 1: of impact, like you'll remember that for absolutely. Yeah, such 624 00:34:08,880 --> 00:34:11,080 Speaker 1: a painful time, Hen, and you're so articulate about it. 625 00:34:11,080 --> 00:34:11,840 Speaker 1: It's really cool. 626 00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:15,080 Speaker 3: I mean, if we can't talk about things, then nothing's 627 00:34:15,120 --> 00:34:16,880 Speaker 3: ever going to change. No one's ever going to be 628 00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:18,960 Speaker 3: able to learn how to cope with these things. 629 00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:34,719 Speaker 1: I agree. What would be your last meal? 630 00:34:36,080 --> 00:34:38,480 Speaker 3: Last meal? I don't want to just say my favorite food, 631 00:34:38,920 --> 00:34:42,440 Speaker 3: which is I don't know, why are. 632 00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:44,520 Speaker 1: You not eating your favorite food for your last monk. 633 00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:48,520 Speaker 3: I've eaten my favorite food every weekend for the last 634 00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:52,920 Speaker 3: like two years, which is I say it a different 635 00:34:52,920 --> 00:34:57,520 Speaker 3: way every time. Hero Giro Giro. I don't know how 636 00:34:57,560 --> 00:35:01,600 Speaker 3: to say it, but yero. I think it's spelled the 637 00:35:03,080 --> 00:35:04,760 Speaker 3: Oh my goodness. 638 00:35:04,920 --> 00:35:07,120 Speaker 1: We call it a gyro in England. 639 00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:13,400 Speaker 3: The Greeks they went crazy with a hero. That is 640 00:35:13,440 --> 00:35:17,239 Speaker 3: my favorite food. It's not what I'm choosing, but it's 641 00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:19,680 Speaker 3: not okay. But it's definitely that you're not. 642 00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:22,240 Speaker 1: Choosing your favorite food that you eat every weekend, because 643 00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:22,600 Speaker 1: you do. 644 00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:25,279 Speaker 3: Eat I do love a good hero. If I got 645 00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:29,080 Speaker 3: to choose my last meal and you know. I've tried 646 00:35:29,080 --> 00:35:30,839 Speaker 3: to think about this a lot, but I don't really 647 00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:35,040 Speaker 3: know what I what I choose? I guess maybe is 648 00:35:35,080 --> 00:35:37,080 Speaker 3: there like a price range? I'm on here? Am I 649 00:35:37,120 --> 00:35:37,720 Speaker 3: in a place? 650 00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,439 Speaker 1: Oh? You're not. You're not restricted by budget at all. 651 00:35:40,760 --> 00:35:42,960 Speaker 1: I love that you said that, though, Henry, that is 652 00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:44,799 Speaker 1: very considerate. 653 00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:45,759 Speaker 3: What can I say? 654 00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:47,040 Speaker 1: There's no price tag? 655 00:35:47,160 --> 00:35:52,720 Speaker 3: Okay, so truffle alfredo tagle itally right there. I want 656 00:35:53,480 --> 00:35:57,960 Speaker 3: baked bell peppers, stuffed with couscouse and cheese. I want 657 00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:01,880 Speaker 3: a whole turkey. I want the legs to be real big. 658 00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:06,320 Speaker 3: What else do I want? I want deal pickle Lais chips. 659 00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:11,840 Speaker 3: I want to have a sprite a mountain dew. I 660 00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:14,480 Speaker 3: want to have a foot long from subway. I want 661 00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:17,520 Speaker 3: the old foot long as well. Whatever this new, this 662 00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,279 Speaker 3: new stuff they're doing, I don't want a new one. 663 00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:21,320 Speaker 1: It's more like seven and a half inches. 664 00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:27,040 Speaker 3: Ain't the Italian bmt. All the toppings, don't skimp out. 665 00:36:27,320 --> 00:36:30,880 Speaker 3: I don't want six olives, I want twelve. I want 666 00:36:31,040 --> 00:36:36,080 Speaker 3: three pints of strawberry ice cream. I want it to 667 00:36:36,120 --> 00:36:41,359 Speaker 3: be Hoggin dolls as well, and I want it all 668 00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:44,920 Speaker 3: on one of those checkered picnic blankets, and that's my 669 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:45,400 Speaker 3: last one. 670 00:36:45,440 --> 00:36:45,960 Speaker 1: Yeah. 671 00:36:46,040 --> 00:36:48,800 Speaker 3: If I'm dying, I'm going all out. I'm just gonna 672 00:36:48,840 --> 00:36:51,520 Speaker 3: eat my little I'm gonna have a little steak. I'ma 673 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:52,320 Speaker 3: have a little wine. 674 00:36:52,640 --> 00:36:55,480 Speaker 1: I want now, you're having a lot of sandwiches and 675 00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:56,520 Speaker 1: a lot of pasta. 676 00:36:56,840 --> 00:36:58,319 Speaker 3: I want everything in there. 677 00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:01,640 Speaker 1: I'm loving it. I'm loving it. May I ask you 678 00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:05,520 Speaker 1: follow up question? Very important? Why would you have three 679 00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:08,640 Speaker 1: pints of the same ice cream flavor? Oh? 680 00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:11,000 Speaker 3: No, that's a fantastic question right there. 681 00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:14,360 Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie. That came from my producer Karen. 682 00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:18,080 Speaker 3: First of all, tell me if I'm going out, ice 683 00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:20,560 Speaker 3: cream is made from milk? Am I correct? To your mother? 684 00:37:20,719 --> 00:37:25,719 Speaker 3: Correct exactly. I want to maximize my carbon footprint, so 685 00:37:25,800 --> 00:37:29,760 Speaker 3: I'm having as much milk because cows they produce methane, 686 00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:33,320 Speaker 3: which is bad for the environment. I'm not thinking about 687 00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:33,719 Speaker 3: any of. 688 00:37:33,640 --> 00:37:35,200 Speaker 1: That now, not as you're dying. 689 00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:38,440 Speaker 3: No, I want as much of that. It can be 690 00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:41,040 Speaker 3: more than three pints. It could be one hundred pints. 691 00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:45,120 Speaker 1: Why all strawberry? Why wouldn't you get one fish food? 692 00:37:45,520 --> 00:37:50,440 Speaker 1: Oh god, strawberry? No, one no, because coffee. 693 00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:52,439 Speaker 3: It's no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, 694 00:37:53,200 --> 00:38:00,640 Speaker 3: it's all strawberry, because strawberry is objectively the best flavor 695 00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:01,800 Speaker 3: of ice cream. 696 00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:07,600 Speaker 1: I would say that's subjectively objectively to you, Strawberry is 697 00:38:07,600 --> 00:38:08,320 Speaker 1: the best flavor. 698 00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:10,960 Speaker 3: And I think just having three points is it's perfect. 699 00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:12,920 Speaker 3: It's perfect for me. I just want to have it 700 00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:15,799 Speaker 3: with me in my in my final moments, it. 701 00:38:15,719 --> 00:38:18,680 Speaker 1: Will be comforting, exactly fair enough strawberry ice cream. 702 00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:20,800 Speaker 3: That is exactly strawberry ice cream, very clear. 703 00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:28,120 Speaker 1: Last question, Yes, I know you sort of touched on 704 00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:31,799 Speaker 1: this in what experience most altoed your life, But in 705 00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:34,680 Speaker 1: your life, can you tell me about something that has 706 00:38:34,840 --> 00:38:37,280 Speaker 1: grown out of a personal disaster? 707 00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:40,719 Speaker 3: I think, yeah, I think I covered. I won't do 708 00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:42,680 Speaker 3: the same one because I feel like I did sort of. 709 00:38:42,640 --> 00:38:45,080 Speaker 1: Say yeah definitely. Is there anything else that you can 710 00:38:45,120 --> 00:38:47,680 Speaker 1: think of? It doesn't even have to be I think 711 00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:51,040 Speaker 1: like big book. But I mean, I say personal disaster, 712 00:38:51,120 --> 00:38:54,440 Speaker 1: but like you know a moment of schism in your life, 713 00:38:54,480 --> 00:38:58,000 Speaker 1: a moment where things really changed, where there was you 714 00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,640 Speaker 1: fell into an abyss, whether it was a big abyss 715 00:39:00,680 --> 00:39:04,200 Speaker 1: or a small abyss, and then something good came out 716 00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:06,160 Speaker 1: of this thing that looked like it was bad. 717 00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:12,680 Speaker 3: Hmmm. I guess growing up from what I've seen in 718 00:39:13,239 --> 00:39:16,240 Speaker 3: all of the movies that I've watched, you know, having 719 00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,680 Speaker 3: sort of people come in and out of your life. 720 00:39:18,719 --> 00:39:21,040 Speaker 3: I think that's a big part of life. But I 721 00:39:21,080 --> 00:39:23,799 Speaker 3: had a friend that I was very close with for 722 00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:26,960 Speaker 3: a very long time, and just sort of when I 723 00:39:27,080 --> 00:39:29,600 Speaker 3: was going through that thing that I mentioned at the 724 00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:33,520 Speaker 3: moment of anxiety, a little moment of anxiety, he wasn't 725 00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:35,240 Speaker 3: very kind. 726 00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:38,640 Speaker 1: Tell me what grew out of the realization of that, 727 00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:42,120 Speaker 1: or the pain of realizing that your friend couldn't be 728 00:39:42,239 --> 00:39:44,080 Speaker 1: there for you. What came out of that that was 729 00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:44,840 Speaker 1: positive for you? 730 00:39:45,200 --> 00:39:48,279 Speaker 3: I guess it wasn't inherently like sort of knowing of 731 00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,600 Speaker 3: these are qualities I like in people, these are qualities 732 00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:52,200 Speaker 3: I don't like, these are the type of people I 733 00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:53,919 Speaker 3: want to be friends with. I think it was more 734 00:39:54,080 --> 00:39:56,920 Speaker 3: just sort of knowing that people come in and out 735 00:39:56,960 --> 00:40:00,160 Speaker 3: of your life. They can be amazing at times for you, 736 00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:04,200 Speaker 3: and then later on not be exactly what you need. 737 00:40:05,160 --> 00:40:07,680 Speaker 3: And I think this sort of goes into a whole 738 00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:11,160 Speaker 3: nother thing about relationships and just like people that I'm 739 00:40:11,160 --> 00:40:13,680 Speaker 3: not really smart enough to know a bunch about, but 740 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:16,000 Speaker 3: just sort of like people will come into your life 741 00:40:16,239 --> 00:40:19,000 Speaker 3: and they'll be great for a moment and then maybe 742 00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:23,960 Speaker 3: they're not great after a while, and realizing that that's okay, 743 00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:29,720 Speaker 3: and that yeah, you're not like a terrible person because 744 00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,520 Speaker 3: you guys aren't getting along anymore or whatever. 745 00:40:33,280 --> 00:40:35,759 Speaker 1: Yeah, you just sometimes you grow out of each other. 746 00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:38,640 Speaker 3: And just knowing that, like you can have had great 747 00:40:38,760 --> 00:40:42,080 Speaker 3: times with someone that doesn't need to be in your 748 00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:45,440 Speaker 3: life anymore, Like knowing that you can remember that stuff 749 00:40:45,480 --> 00:40:47,600 Speaker 3: and not be like, oh, but am I allowed to 750 00:40:47,600 --> 00:40:50,600 Speaker 3: think that because now we're not really speaking anymore. No, 751 00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:53,440 Speaker 3: that was those were good times. You can still think 752 00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:55,319 Speaker 3: about that that you can you can still go back 753 00:40:55,320 --> 00:40:57,320 Speaker 3: on those and be like, yes, that was fucking great, 754 00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:03,720 Speaker 3: but know that you know now it's not like that exactly, 755 00:41:03,760 --> 00:41:06,879 Speaker 3: and know that that's fine, Know that that's not that 756 00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:09,920 Speaker 3: doesn't reflect you as a person, That doesn't reflect them 757 00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:14,000 Speaker 3: as a person. It's just how it's gone. And I think, yeah, definitely, 758 00:41:14,080 --> 00:41:17,600 Speaker 3: learning that, like relationships are fluid in the same way 759 00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:20,080 Speaker 3: that life is, and that you know you don't need 760 00:41:20,120 --> 00:41:23,040 Speaker 3: to be attached, you don't need to feel as though 761 00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,280 Speaker 3: you have to feel one way about something or another 762 00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:30,560 Speaker 3: just because of what's gone on between you two. If 763 00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:34,800 Speaker 3: I'm saying that sort of in a clear way, and yeah, 764 00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:36,799 Speaker 3: I think that was That was another thing that sort 765 00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:40,840 Speaker 3: of grew out of that moment for me about a 766 00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:41,319 Speaker 3: year ago. 767 00:41:41,560 --> 00:41:45,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, you're a wise one. Hannah's thank you, I like 768 00:41:45,960 --> 00:41:51,560 Speaker 1: to think, so thank you for giving me an hour 769 00:41:51,719 --> 00:41:55,279 Speaker 1: of time. I love talking to you, of course, Mom. 770 00:41:55,320 --> 00:41:57,560 Speaker 1: I love talking to you. Thank you so interested. I 771 00:41:57,640 --> 00:42:00,479 Speaker 1: love checking in with where you're at. And it's really 772 00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:04,480 Speaker 1: interesting and you know, I know you think that there 773 00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:07,640 Speaker 1: have always been historically tough moments. They have, but this 774 00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:10,480 Speaker 1: has been a particularly weird time to be a kid. 775 00:42:10,640 --> 00:42:13,640 Speaker 1: And I'm constantly in or of how you navigate it all. 776 00:42:13,640 --> 00:42:15,919 Speaker 1: And I love your friends. They're really cool. 777 00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:18,719 Speaker 3: Thanks Mom, But most of all, I love you, love you, 778 00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:24,520 Speaker 3: love thank you Darling, of course mom. 779 00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,799 Speaker 1: Mini Questions is hosted and written by Me Mini Driver, 780 00:42:28,680 --> 00:42:32,840 Speaker 1: Executive produced by Me and Aaron Kaufman, with production support 781 00:42:32,920 --> 00:42:37,279 Speaker 1: from Jennifer Bassett, Zoe Denkler, and Ali Perry. The theme 782 00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:42,080 Speaker 1: music is also by Me and additional music by Aaron Kaufman. 783 00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:48,320 Speaker 1: Special thanks to Jim Nikolay Addison, O'Day Henry Driver Lisa Castella, 784 00:42:48,640 --> 00:42:52,040 Speaker 1: a Nick Oppenheim, A, Nick Muller, and Annette Wolf at 785 00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:57,960 Speaker 1: w kPr, Will Pearson, Nicki Etoor, Morgan Levoy and mangesh 786 00:42:58,239 --> 00:42:58,920 Speaker 1: had Tigadore