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Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio

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Speaker 1: and The Black Effect Now.

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Speaker 2: So we're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion

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Speaker 2: who talks. What's up y'all? Thank you for tuning in

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Speaker 2: for a new.

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Speaker 3: Episode and We Talk Back the show dedicated to you

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Speaker 3: dreamers and chasers. This is your co host aj Holiday.

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Speaker 3: What's up, Tam Bam.

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Speaker 2: You can never be too sure who we're gonna get

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Speaker 2: in the beginning. Are we gonna get bitches and hoes,

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Speaker 2: dreams and chasers? I think we should come up with

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Speaker 2: something new for the new year. You know I agree that. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so let's do We'll come up with it anyway. It's

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Speaker 2: Dan Bam, y'all. I love y'all, motherfucking as. I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: keep telling y'all that in the mid year every year.

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Speaker 2: How about your weekend?

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Speaker 3: It was great. I did all these wonderful things from

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Speaker 3: my bed.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah. She sent me a video of her and

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Speaker 2: her cat. Laid up. Girl like her cat ate her

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Speaker 2: up in the video. I ain't even gonna lie. The

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Speaker 2: cat was like staring into my eyes in the video.

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Speaker 2: That's a beautiful cat.

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Speaker 3: I really feel like I do have like the prettiest

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Speaker 3: cat in the world.

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Speaker 2: That cat is. Yeah, I'm not talking about her v

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Speaker 2: joinny you guys, I've never seen that. I'm talking about

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Speaker 2: her her cat dotcha meat. She is, man, but that cat.

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Speaker 3: Cats are different, man Like, if you ain't never had

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Speaker 3: a cat, you thought she was gonna get like a

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Speaker 3: cat dog. The type situation like these is two different.

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Speaker 3: This bitch is a bitch, man Like, when she don't

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Speaker 3: feel like getting touched, she be acting real stink and

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Speaker 3: I be real mad about that because I want cuddles.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, like not right now, nah, bitch.

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Speaker 3: And but waking me up three o'clock in the morning

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Speaker 3: to get rubbed up shit like that, Like she literally

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Speaker 3: stand on my chest and just yeah, I love her. Man.

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Speaker 2: It looks like your love. And that's excellent. That's how

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Speaker 2: I get a cat.

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Speaker 3: That's all I did. And I did do some writing, okay, y'all.

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Speaker 3: I am trying to write at least an hour today.

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Speaker 3: So for Black Friday, I bought some vitamins from Vitamin Shop.

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Speaker 3: I got fifty percent off of my trading view app

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Speaker 3: that I pay every year. I wait till Black Friday

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Speaker 3: every year because that shit is five ninety nine five

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Speaker 3: hundred and ninety nine dollars, so I buy it. You know,

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Speaker 3: it does seventy percent off of Black Friday. And then

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Speaker 3: another subscription I added was Final Draft. Uh, it's for

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Speaker 3: like screenplay writing. Now I've committed because I've spent money.

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Speaker 3: See that, Like I do shit when I got to

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Speaker 3: pay for it. Okay, So yeah, I like a little

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Speaker 3: tool on their that it asking me you first signed, like,

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Speaker 3: you know, like the whole you're accountable. So I'm getting

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Speaker 3: like dings like bitch, you ain't right yet today.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, I like that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's not the right time.

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Speaker 2: Procrastinates, you know me.

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Speaker 3: Because I saw a post that said, even if the

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Speaker 3: do date is five years from now, I'm still doing

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Speaker 3: that ship the night before.

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Speaker 2: That's me. I don't know why I'm like this. You

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Speaker 2: work better under pressure, that's all. That's how I like

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Speaker 2: to view it.

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Speaker 3: But I be stressed the fuck out, but it gets

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Speaker 3: done and it'd be.

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Speaker 2: Good, but it gets done better because you're stressed.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's how.

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Speaker 2: That's how I rationalize it to make it okay.

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Speaker 3: The bullshit. So those are some of the things I

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Speaker 3: don't want to do in twenty twenty five. I need

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Speaker 3: to stop I just need to do do what I

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Speaker 3: say I'm gonna do.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna get it. We're gonna have an episode on

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Speaker 2: that for sure. What did I do this weekend? Oh?

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Speaker 2: I did all the girlfriend things, you know. I'm like

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Speaker 2: got a lot of friend circles that I belong to

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Speaker 2: and all our I had two Christmas parties this weekend.

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Speaker 2: One of them was a girls house, like we had

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Speaker 2: gingerbread houses, but it's woodn't and we had to decorate

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Speaker 2: and paint it and whoever did it the best won

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Speaker 2: a gift, and of course I want. I did a

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Speaker 2: cute little barn house and I put Santa's footprints on

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Speaker 2: top of the house to me, and I put little

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Speaker 2: lights on it, and it was just so cute. I

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Speaker 2: had so much fun at that party. She had it

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Speaker 2: curated so nice. She had like a rose at your

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Speaker 2: seat with a little chalkboard with your name on it.

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Speaker 2: It's so cute.

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Speaker 3: That sounds nice and cute.

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Speaker 2: It was super cute and we were drinking. It was

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Speaker 2: very merry. Then the next night it was my other

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Speaker 2: girls group. It was our fourteenth annual Girlfriend's Gift Exchange

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Speaker 2: and we do the secret Sanna get a secret Santa

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Speaker 2: give each other gifts, and we keep the amount low

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Speaker 2: fifty dollars minimum. You know, that's the minute you can go.

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Speaker 2: You can spend ten thousand if.

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Speaker 3: You want, but I think giving ermaz bags.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, no, we keep it cute. It'd be between

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Speaker 2: fifty and one hundred dollars they spent. We spend on

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Speaker 2: each other. A lot of them have kids. They can't

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Speaker 2: afford to be like, you know, going crazy for their

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Speaker 2: friends when they got children, to buy four and stuff

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Speaker 2: like that. So we keep it cute and not go

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Speaker 2: too crazy. And we did the Old Lady Gang this year,

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Speaker 2: and they had a decorated cute like they had like

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Speaker 2: we all dressed as old bitches, gray wigs, canes. I mean,

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Speaker 2: it was so much fun. And they had like urine

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Speaker 2: sample shots. They had like uh the needle like a shot, yes, syringe,

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Speaker 2: it was a shot. They had chill peel like the

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Speaker 2: medicine bottle and it had candy in it and they

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Speaker 2: had your name on it and your birthday.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: They also had like atry seat and let you know

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Speaker 2: where you were sitting. They took pictures off our social

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Speaker 2: media and aged us. So it's like this old lass

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Speaker 2: lady with my face. It's supposed to be me as

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Speaker 2: a granny.

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Speaker 3: I was like, that ain't me.

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Speaker 2: That ain't how I'm a look.

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Speaker 3: But that's how you sound as Helen. It ain't me.

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Speaker 2: That's how I learn. Y'all heard that. I know y'all

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Speaker 2: heard it.

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Speaker 3: Whatever the old last lady came out of there, that

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Speaker 3: ain't how I look.

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Speaker 2: So it's Helen. That was fun and that was my

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Speaker 2: weekend for real. Oh and I have not told anyone

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Speaker 2: of this, but I guess I'll share it here right now.

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Speaker 2: I I auditioned for an acting academy in New York

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Speaker 2: and I got here. Oh shit, No, So I started

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Speaker 2: February fourth in New York.

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Speaker 3: You'll know I'll be all over.

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Speaker 2: Doing anything. Yeah, I'm going to action school starting February

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Speaker 2: fourth in New York City on Broadway.

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Speaker 3: I hear that girl so lately I've been trying to

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Speaker 3: you know, so in South Carolina, you don't have to

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Speaker 3: have any certification for apparentegal cause I'm like, damn it,

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna be a little lawyer tomorrow.

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Speaker 2: Maybe I can do that, do it.

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Speaker 3: So I actually have a paralegal interview coming up.

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Speaker 2: Excellent, excellent, man, I like, we're going into our second life.

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Speaker 2: You know, we've done the first one, and this is

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Speaker 2: our second lifetime. In this lifetime, yep, you know.

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Speaker 3: So maybe at some point I might have to move

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Speaker 3: to a damn state where I can legally get a

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Speaker 3: California did cha. I'm not going back to school, fuck y'all.

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Speaker 3: I'm not doing it. But I need to do some

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Speaker 3: kimk shit because I definitely I just feel like there's

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Speaker 3: a lot of hidden things that you don't know until

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Speaker 3: you get to these other levels. Not there's okay, I

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Speaker 3: know a lot of hidden things, right, but then there's

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Speaker 3: still things that you don't know and understand till you

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Speaker 3: actually experience them.

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Speaker 2: So I feel like there's.

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Speaker 3: Some some secret stuff I want to learn. Legal, of course,

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Speaker 3: of course, so maybe I could be your entertainment lawyer.

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Speaker 3: Bitch yep, I will let you do all the contract

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Speaker 3: you know.

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Speaker 2: I hate that shit. Let's get in the scene.

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Speaker 3: The people is coming for gas. And when I say

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Speaker 3: the people, so this attorney what is his name, big

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Speaker 3: booty hole?

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Speaker 2: What's his name?

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Speaker 3: Tom Busby?

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Speaker 2: So?

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Speaker 3: Uh he actually put up I think he wasn't he

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Speaker 3: the same attorney that Tony Buzzby. Excuse me, wasn't he

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Speaker 3: the same attorney that put up like the hotline for

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Speaker 3: people to call in who were allegedly violated by Diddy

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Speaker 3: or jay Z?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. I didn't, I wasn't. I wasn't.

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Speaker 3: Pretty sure is this guy? I'm pretty sure? So imagine

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Speaker 3: what type of crazies came through the hotline, right, Not

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Speaker 3: to discredit anybody who actually had some crazy ass experiences

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Speaker 3: at any point in their lives with these people, because

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Speaker 3: I mean, we don't know, right, but I think when

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Speaker 3: you open some shit up like that to the public,

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Speaker 3: you will have.

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Speaker 2: Yes just calling in trying to see how they can

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Speaker 2: get a piece of the pie.

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Speaker 3: So you then discredit the people who actually have suffered, yes,

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Speaker 3: and then also like y'all not coming from no criminal well,

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Speaker 3: judity is in jail, right, So this is for more

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Speaker 3: recent things. But the thing that they're that Diddy is

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Speaker 3: being sued for the civil lawsuit of this thirteen year

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Speaker 3: old girl that came out a couple months ago. They

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Speaker 3: have now edited that and added jay Z to it.

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Speaker 3: The same Yeah, So what they're saying is what the

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Speaker 3: Tony Buzzby is saying, is that they tried to do

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Speaker 3: a mediation with jay Z. They reached out to him

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Speaker 3: and his lawyers and wanted to do a mediation. They

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Speaker 3: weren't asking for any money. What what the fuck y'all

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Speaker 3: want mediation when there's a civil lawsuit? What else you

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Speaker 3: want to talk about other than ways to make this

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Speaker 3: go away?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 3: So they send a demand letter saying, Hey, if you

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Speaker 3: don't pay such and such or don't sit down and

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Speaker 3: have this conversation with us, we're gonna go public with it.

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Speaker 3: I guess jay Z said, fuck it, we'll public with it.

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Speaker 3: And I think this may be the first time we

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Speaker 3: saw an actual statement from an accuser, not accuser, excuse me,

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Speaker 3: an actual statement from the person being accused jay Z.

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Speaker 3: You know it wasn't from an attorney, so he put

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Speaker 3: out a stationment.

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Speaker 2: It just almost seems like a witch hunt, you know,

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Speaker 2: like you know, I would. Jay Z is one of

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Speaker 2: my favorites. Did he was too, So it's just very

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Speaker 2: sad to see all of this take place. And I

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Speaker 2: hope it's not true, but you never know. But I

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Speaker 2: just hope this is definitely just another attemp to take

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Speaker 2: down a black man and not true. He don't He's

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Speaker 2: never appeared to be the type that like children, but

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Speaker 2: who knows. You never know what's lying beneath the surface.

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Speaker 3: Okay, so let's do some math and let's just take

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Speaker 3: a look at some historical events. So I think Diddy,

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Speaker 3: I'm not Diddy. Jay Z is like what fifty five now, right,

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Speaker 3: So they're a legend that this incident happened over two

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Speaker 3: decades ago, in two thousand, right, So we're talking twenty

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Speaker 3: five years ago. Jay Z and Diddy would have been

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Speaker 3: like thirty at that time. This young girl was at

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Speaker 3: Grammy's or a VMA party, like what you're doing there?

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Speaker 3: A friend dropped her off and she called her dad

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Speaker 3: to pick her up after the incident, like these are

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Speaker 3: the things that are in the lawsuit. Why were you there? Right? Right?

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Speaker 3: So sometimes we have to take accountability for the things.

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Speaker 3: And this is not victim blaming, but you cannot put

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Speaker 3: yourself in risky situations, right because it sounds like you

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Speaker 3: ended up in somebody's hotel room, in a back room somewhere,

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Speaker 3: and you know, let's not forget that shit.

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Speaker 2: How old was Foxy Brown? Mm hmm? How old was Beyauncey?

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Speaker 2: How old is Aliyah?

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Speaker 3: So we're not gonna act like grown men don't be

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Speaker 3: at little girls because both of us, right have been

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Speaker 3: young girls looking older mm hmm unless you lie your age.

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Speaker 2: I could definitely remember a lot of grown men trying

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Speaker 2: to see what was up with me as a young.

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Speaker 3: Girl, knowing your age and not knowing Yes, yes, mm hmm.

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Speaker 3: Don't do it, bitch, because there's a lot of people

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Speaker 3: out here that would be shamed.

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Speaker 2: Okay, yes, I can remember. I'm not gonna tell this. No,

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Speaker 2: telling here is terrible. I ain't gonna tell it.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, man, Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Me neither. I'm just speechless on that. But you know,

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Speaker 2: every dog has a day, so we'll see what happened

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Speaker 2: with that.

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Speaker 3: And you know, the adult, the adult is so the

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Speaker 3: responsible party, yep, right, But you know it took you

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Speaker 3: twenty five years to want to do this, to file

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Speaker 3: these lawsuits and stuff like that, because now it's just

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Speaker 3: a it just doesn't look credible right at the.

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Speaker 2: Smith apart, that's the part. It just don't look credible

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Speaker 2: at all. But I just feel like every man who

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Speaker 2: has influence should probably be like holding his nuts tight

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Speaker 2: right now, especially if he ever even did the smallest

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Speaker 2: infraction of anything. Like that shit could come back to

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Speaker 2: haunt you twenty five years later.

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Speaker 3: And see, that's my thing though, you know when they say, oh,

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Speaker 3: they're trying to take the black man down, right, why

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Speaker 3: is there anything out there that could possibly incriminate you? Why?

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Speaker 3: Why do why do those things exist? Because I do

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Speaker 3: understand that, you know, they could create stuff, But we

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Speaker 3: saw videos of Diddy's stumping Cassie like you, actually we

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Speaker 3: did that in a public place, and if you didn't

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Speaker 3: give a fuck about who saw it there, I can

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Speaker 3: only imagine the things that you did to.

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Speaker 2: Her and public in private, in private?

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Speaker 3: Right, So why do they have these things on y'all

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Speaker 3: in the first place? And if you want to say

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Speaker 3: it's the powers that be, these niggas stop playing the game.

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Speaker 3: They try to suit this one and then all of

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Speaker 3: a sudden these charges come up.

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Speaker 2: We know they do this to us.

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Speaker 3: And this is why I still say, niggas don't want

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Speaker 3: to knock all this shit over and start a new

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Speaker 3: They just want close proximity to whiteness so they can

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Speaker 3: do the dirty shit that them people do mm hm.

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Speaker 2: And that's the problem.

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Speaker 3: So before we could talk about any other community, we

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Speaker 3: need to clean our porch.

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Speaker 2: Better sweep around your own front door.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, like we gotta clean our porch. Because that's the

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00:14:45,080 --> 00:14:48,120
Speaker 3: grand scale, right, Let's just talk about on the small

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Speaker 3: micro level, like within families and how we know we

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Speaker 3: got predators in these.

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Speaker 2: Families, in our families, in our families.

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Speaker 3: Did you see that freestyle from that little girl, the

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Speaker 3: young girl rapping and she was talking about it's it's

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Speaker 3: going viral right now because I know a little duval

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Speaker 3: just posted it.

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Speaker 2: I know I sent it to you.

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Speaker 3: She had like blonde hair or something. But she was

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Speaker 3: rapping about like how the families be protecting the demons

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Speaker 3: while they violating the angels, like within the family and

295
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Speaker 3: they get protected the women. The women protect these men.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmmm.

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Speaker 3: A lot of the times they.

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Speaker 2: Know exactly who.

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Speaker 3: We know exactly who these niggas be.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we do. That's the truth.

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Speaker 3: Baby got a couple of dollars. People overlook a lot

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Speaker 3: of things.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 3: But this is the age of the query's baby. Ain't

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Speaker 3: nothing hidden, no more.

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Speaker 2: Than everything everything. Yep.

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Speaker 3: I just hope my fucking irs don't come after me.

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Speaker 2: But I think you know it's it's unfortunately men like women.

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Speaker 2: You you know, we going on through life. It's like,

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Speaker 2: if I've become very successful and super rich and famous,

311
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Speaker 2: I ain't did shit to nobody that's gonna come back

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Speaker 2: to like haunt me in this way. And it's just like,

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Speaker 2: how do you not be able to go through life

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Speaker 2: without violating people? You know you can though, That's what

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Speaker 2: I'm saying. Men, it just seems why they can, right,

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Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know. I don't know why

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Speaker 2: that is.

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Speaker 3: But I mean, we we're talking about like like Diddy

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Speaker 3: for instance, Like he made a living off that, off

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Speaker 3: the party life. That's how the songs were created. Right,

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00:16:35,080 --> 00:16:37,320
Speaker 3: Ain't no party like a Diddy party? Like that's what

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00:16:37,400 --> 00:16:41,120
Speaker 3: he's literally known for and he's being prosecuted for that now.

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Speaker 2: Hmm. That's to be more careful. You gotta be careful, man.

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Speaker 3: And also, just like Drake, Jake be having these bitch

325
00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:52,920
Speaker 3: aside paperwork, so maybe you got to get some more

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00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:57,360
Speaker 3: NDA's out there. Yeah, before you violate them, get him

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Speaker 3: to sign some paperwork that.

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Speaker 2: They be violated, because some people like that kind of shit. Anyway.

329
00:17:04,240 --> 00:17:08,560
Speaker 2: The shades are gray. An influencer drops nineteen K on

330
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Speaker 2: the surgery to become an I put in heavy quotations.

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Speaker 2: A virgin again what a doctor warns of the risks involved.

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Speaker 2: So this girl renewed her v card so to speak,

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00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:26,440
Speaker 2: by having a nineteen thousand dollars vaginal rejuvenation operation basically

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Speaker 2: to uh recorrect her hymen right to like make it

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Speaker 2: a new.

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00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,359
Speaker 3: So I guess the next time after the surgery, whenever

337
00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:40,000
Speaker 3: she has sex, she'll bleed again.

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00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:46,639
Speaker 2: Why I don't get it. That's so stupid. That's a

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00:17:46,680 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 2: waste of nineteen thousand dollars because.

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00:17:49,760 --> 00:17:52,920
Speaker 3: You're not mess somebody. Yeah, and then now it's like public,

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00:17:53,480 --> 00:17:55,160
Speaker 3: so now like it's not like you're about to get

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Speaker 3: a husband, like, hey, you're getting a virgin and no, bitch,

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00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:01,240
Speaker 3: we know that you had ury to get that Gucci back,

344
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:05,160
Speaker 3: and are you going to get it tightened? Also like drivenation,

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00:18:05,840 --> 00:18:08,800
Speaker 3: Well she only twenty three, it should still be very.

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00:18:08,520 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 2: Oh yeah elastic. Oh yeah, twenty three, that's it's still

347
00:18:13,119 --> 00:18:15,480
Speaker 2: super tight. Yeah, it depends.

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00:18:16,240 --> 00:18:18,159
Speaker 3: She might be a porn star and I had a

349
00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:24,240
Speaker 3: lot of dick because why, like, what is the point.

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Speaker 2: So you brush your teeth, does that mean you haven't

351
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:31,960
Speaker 2: you never had given hand? If you brush your teeth

352
00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:35,919
Speaker 2: every day, it's starting over. I guess every day we

353
00:18:36,000 --> 00:18:40,240
Speaker 2: live in a society, you get to decide what reality

354
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Speaker 2: is every day. So she's a virgin again? Who am

355
00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:45,760
Speaker 2: I to told her she's not at this point?

356
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Speaker 3: And I wonder when she planned on having sex again.

357
00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:51,040
Speaker 3: I wonder when she planned on busting and wide open again.

358
00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,520
Speaker 3: I don't remember ever having that though. I don't remember

359
00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:57,760
Speaker 3: ever like bleeding bleeding me neither, because I feel like

360
00:18:57,760 --> 00:18:59,439
Speaker 3: there's other ways outside of sex to.

361
00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:03,879
Speaker 2: Because we were like and all that stuff, But I

362
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,240
Speaker 2: still don't remember it bleeding from that, you know, So

363
00:19:06,359 --> 00:19:10,040
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know, y'all. I'm no pride

364
00:19:10,040 --> 00:19:12,720
Speaker 2: to you with your new pussy. Yeah, congratulations.

365
00:19:15,280 --> 00:19:18,119
Speaker 3: So would you go to a church that has like

366
00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:19,160
Speaker 3: an AI Jesus?

367
00:19:20,119 --> 00:19:23,879
Speaker 2: Excuse me? Say come again? Say what? So?

368
00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:28,520
Speaker 3: Look this church, says church has an AI Jesus for confessions.

369
00:19:28,600 --> 00:19:32,920
Speaker 3: It gave me so much advice. One user says, so

370
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:38,560
Speaker 3: is this the messiah they put ai? Aya says, just

371
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:42,480
Speaker 3: in case, artificial intelligence hasn't been taken over taking on

372
00:19:42,640 --> 00:19:46,840
Speaker 3: enough jobs lately. Now it's replacing the almighty. A church

373
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:50,880
Speaker 3: in Switzerland is now using an AI hologram of Jesus.

374
00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:54,879
Speaker 3: I wonder what color they got him to take confessions

375
00:19:55,560 --> 00:20:01,080
Speaker 3: A hologram Jesus wife to take confessions from athletic worshippers,

376
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:04,880
Speaker 3: as seen in a wild viral video, and one user says,

377
00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:08,600
Speaker 3: I was surprised it was so easy, and though it's

378
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:11,000
Speaker 3: a machine, it gave me so much advice.

379
00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:14,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, check GPT do that shit too. Yeah, That's what

380
00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:17,200
Speaker 2: I'm saying. Is yet GPT Jesus right?

381
00:20:17,560 --> 00:20:19,919
Speaker 3: So yeah, so they got like the image. There's a

382
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,880
Speaker 3: video out there, y'all. This is on n y Post. Also,

383
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:31,040
Speaker 3: it says before entering robo Jesus cautions do not disclose

384
00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:36,200
Speaker 3: personal information under any circumstances this service. Oh, use the

385
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:38,560
Speaker 3: service at your own Oh. I cannot fucking read. What

386
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,159
Speaker 3: is happening?

387
00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:40,800
Speaker 2: Girls acting like.

388
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:47,960
Speaker 3: The whole time we've been doing this shit, they resided

389
00:20:48,119 --> 00:20:48,840
Speaker 3: really well.

390
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:51,760
Speaker 2: You always be like, what is happening? No, But I

391
00:20:51,800 --> 00:20:53,920
Speaker 2: feel like some days it's worse though.

392
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:57,400
Speaker 3: It's like I be It's not that.

393
00:20:57,320 --> 00:21:01,120
Speaker 4: I'm not seeing ahead of the coming out of your mouth.

394
00:21:01,440 --> 00:21:03,439
Speaker 3: I feel like that's what it is like. Maybe what

395
00:21:03,560 --> 00:21:04,760
Speaker 3: is it called dyslexic?

396
00:21:04,800 --> 00:21:07,040
Speaker 2: A little bit? I don't know. Oh, I can't say.

397
00:21:07,560 --> 00:21:09,960
Speaker 3: Your hand bitch, and we got a new administration. We

398
00:21:10,000 --> 00:21:14,240
Speaker 3: could say all the bad words now, Okay, that's.

399
00:21:14,080 --> 00:21:16,520
Speaker 2: Fucked up, Okay, it says.

400
00:21:16,560 --> 00:21:20,919
Speaker 3: The futuristic Shrine features a confessional booth with a screen

401
00:21:21,000 --> 00:21:23,720
Speaker 3: displaying the face of Jesus and Who's I just want

402
00:21:23,760 --> 00:21:28,000
Speaker 3: to know, like who determined? Like the face of Jesus

403
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:34,919
Speaker 3: through the great Before entering robo, Jesus cautions, do not

404
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:39,760
Speaker 3: disclose personal information under any circumstances. Use this service at

405
00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:43,679
Speaker 3: your own risk. Press the button if you accept.

406
00:21:43,960 --> 00:21:44,640
Speaker 2: Okay, So you.

407
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:49,159
Speaker 3: Can go there and tell this Jesus all the things, okay,

408
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:51,800
Speaker 3: and he's going to keep all your sins and secrets.

409
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,879
Speaker 2: I would go in there and tell him all kind

410
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:56,160
Speaker 2: of shit they wouldn't true, just to see what Jesus

411
00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:57,960
Speaker 2: is gonna say.

412
00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:01,120
Speaker 3: Jesus is supposed to say, like you're forgiven every time?

413
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:05,640
Speaker 2: Right, I don't know what a Jesus is gonna say.

414
00:22:05,000 --> 00:22:09,160
Speaker 2: I kill somebody and see what happened, and see if

415
00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:13,280
Speaker 2: AI Jesus called the police on me, because Alex will.

416
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:19,200
Speaker 3: If you tell the police Alexa done her a bitch,

417
00:22:19,240 --> 00:22:21,680
Speaker 3: getting her ass whooped and called the police before.

418
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:25,600
Speaker 2: Well that's good on Alexa, because yes, we need some

419
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:32,399
Speaker 2: more support out here. Good. Yeah, that's wold and the

420
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:36,000
Speaker 2: earth is in shambles at this point, zero stars.

421
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:39,720
Speaker 3: I don't know. Maybe God will come look at me

422
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:40,200
Speaker 3: like that.

423
00:22:40,359 --> 00:22:43,080
Speaker 2: Y'all ought to be shamed with y'allself with that one.

424
00:22:43,119 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 2: He don't even look like me. And I ain't coming

425
00:22:46,160 --> 00:22:47,800
Speaker 2: back there, y'all ghetto.

426
00:22:48,080 --> 00:22:50,760
Speaker 3: Y'all be looking for me, and I ain't never coming back.

427
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:54,080
Speaker 2: Talking about I'm coming back. I'm not coming back there.

428
00:22:54,160 --> 00:22:59,480
Speaker 2: Y'all show out too bad. Hmm. So we heard that.

429
00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 3: The gen Zers are having problems finding and keeping like

430
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:09,960
Speaker 3: real life friends, and I don't feel like that's just

431
00:23:10,040 --> 00:23:12,080
Speaker 3: exclusive to their group, because I feel like we might

432
00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:14,840
Speaker 3: have went through the same type of shit, or we

433
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,800
Speaker 3: still have grown people who be out here putting on

434
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:18,600
Speaker 3: the internet how they don't got no friends.

435
00:23:18,320 --> 00:23:21,439
Speaker 2: And no friends, Like I just see a lot of

436
00:23:21,480 --> 00:23:26,560
Speaker 2: young girls, especially in the hair salon, and like my kids,

437
00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:29,520
Speaker 2: my friends kids and stuff like that, Like they say

438
00:23:29,640 --> 00:23:32,600
Speaker 2: I don't have no friends, and it's so often I

439
00:23:32,640 --> 00:23:34,680
Speaker 2: hear that, and I just think that's the strangest thing.

440
00:23:35,119 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 2: And I think it's important. It's so important for us

441
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:44,520
Speaker 2: to have friends. I couldn't imagine my life without friends neither.

442
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:48,600
Speaker 2: It's weird. It's very weird, and it's sad. So I

443
00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:51,600
Speaker 2: wanted to have a conversation about it, and you know,

444
00:23:51,920 --> 00:23:54,840
Speaker 2: get our gen Z listeners and some grown women too,

445
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:59,159
Speaker 2: you know, to help them find friendships and find your

446
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:04,399
Speaker 2: tribe you need now more than ever. Yep, we'll be

447
00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:04,920
Speaker 2: right back.

448
00:24:09,240 --> 00:24:15,000
Speaker 3: So you know, personally, I have never had problems making

449
00:24:16,200 --> 00:24:18,640
Speaker 3: or keeping friends. Now I have lost some friends over

450
00:24:18,680 --> 00:24:21,040
Speaker 3: the years, and I think that the more fucking friends

451
00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 3: you lose it gets easier. But I do mourn the

452
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:28,080
Speaker 3: loss of those friendships still, right but because.

453
00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,280
Speaker 2: Question death, especially with someone that you know you loved,

454
00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 2: you know what, it's almost like someone died. There are

455
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:37,960
Speaker 2: relationships right now that I like. Some of my closest

456
00:24:38,000 --> 00:24:40,880
Speaker 2: friends in life I'm not even talking to and I'm

457
00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:43,920
Speaker 2: too stubborn to reach out.

458
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:47,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm never I don't really, I don't have ego

459
00:24:48,000 --> 00:24:50,520
Speaker 3: when it comes to people I love. But now you

460
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:53,840
Speaker 3: just be straight disrespecting me, like I'm gonna have to

461
00:24:53,840 --> 00:24:55,680
Speaker 3: cut your ass off. I have a lot of tolerance

462
00:24:55,680 --> 00:24:58,199
Speaker 3: for bullshit. It's a lot like I as long as

463
00:24:58,280 --> 00:25:00,680
Speaker 3: I know who you are, I'm gonna deal with it

464
00:25:00,760 --> 00:25:02,680
Speaker 3: so we can continue on. But when the shit get

465
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,320
Speaker 3: a little bit too hectic, I gotta get out of there.

466
00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,680
Speaker 2: I just be feeling like I be working too hard

467
00:25:09,680 --> 00:25:11,919
Speaker 2: to make relationships work, and now I just at a

468
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:16,399
Speaker 2: place where I just I'm okay with my circle being

469
00:25:16,560 --> 00:25:19,280
Speaker 2: smaller and more quality, you know, I don't have to

470
00:25:19,320 --> 00:25:22,679
Speaker 2: have because I have like a ton of friends, you know.

471
00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:27,520
Speaker 2: So now I've over my life, I've had like more

472
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:31,680
Speaker 2: friends than the average beer right. But that's because one

473
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:35,600
Speaker 2: I'm coolest fuck, and two that because the environment that

474
00:25:35,680 --> 00:25:38,359
Speaker 2: I work in is just always women, you know. So

475
00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 2: I always make relationships with women. But everybody ain't your friend,

476
00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:47,760
Speaker 2: you know. So sometimes at this age, I'm okay with

477
00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:51,479
Speaker 2: letting a couple of them going with their life, you know.

478
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,919
Speaker 3: And see, maybe that's what the younger generation is recognizing

479
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 3: that though we know these people and we might even

480
00:25:57,280 --> 00:26:00,200
Speaker 3: congregate with them, sometimes are they really our friends. It's

481
00:26:00,200 --> 00:26:02,480
Speaker 3: like the hood Healer on Instagram put up a post

482
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 3: earlier and was like, listen the zodiac of your most

483
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:11,080
Speaker 3: dependable and then list the zodiac that you get into

484
00:26:11,320 --> 00:26:15,080
Speaker 3: it with the most, and really like it's the same

485
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:19,159
Speaker 3: fucking people like I can say cancer is dependable, but

486
00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:22,440
Speaker 3: also I get into it with a motherfucking cancer, like it's.

487
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:23,160
Speaker 2: The same person.

488
00:26:23,840 --> 00:26:28,879
Speaker 3: But I just feel like maybe the younger generation is

489
00:26:29,000 --> 00:26:33,120
Speaker 3: just like, oh, we're just associates. Maybe they don't really like.

490
00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:35,840
Speaker 2: But I'm but not even that, because I will hear

491
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:38,560
Speaker 2: young girls say I'm like, why then you don't go

492
00:26:38,600 --> 00:26:41,040
Speaker 2: out sometime? I don't have nobody to go out with,

493
00:26:42,080 --> 00:26:44,159
Speaker 2: Like they don't even have bitches to hang out with,

494
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:47,720
Speaker 2: like and now I would in my day, I would say,

495
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:51,119
Speaker 2: this ain't my friend. We just go out, you know,

496
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:53,360
Speaker 2: we cool and we go out, but I don't call

497
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:56,600
Speaker 2: her to cry on her shoulder. You know, did you

498
00:26:56,640 --> 00:26:59,480
Speaker 2: have relationships with like girls that you would just put

499
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:02,480
Speaker 2: your part friends when you know in the twenties.

500
00:27:02,640 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 3: I feel like in my twenties, I like people with

501
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,399
Speaker 3: I had like people here and there that I would

502
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:11,480
Speaker 3: go out with, But it's not like somebody I talked

503
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:14,199
Speaker 3: to on a daily basis, Like maybe we were like

504
00:27:14,359 --> 00:27:17,000
Speaker 3: trying to see if we would be friends type thing.

505
00:27:17,080 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 3: Like like when I moved to Atlanta and you meet people,

506
00:27:19,080 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying, So you kind of like

507
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 3: leaning through people, y'all? Might hang out a couple of times,

508
00:27:23,240 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 3: but they're not really my friends. I didn't have. I've

509
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:28,080
Speaker 3: never had any women that I actually hang out with

510
00:27:28,240 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 3: consistently and not consider them my friend.

511
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:36,399
Speaker 2: I would, Yeah, that's fair, I did. I knew I

512
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:39,359
Speaker 2: would have women that we would go out, but that

513
00:27:39,480 --> 00:27:44,120
Speaker 2: would be our relationship, that we part of the relationship. Yeah,

514
00:27:44,160 --> 00:27:46,240
Speaker 2: we party, but I'm not me and her not going

515
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:50,840
Speaker 2: to church together. You know we're not. I'm not telling

516
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:53,000
Speaker 2: you when somebody died in my family. I'm not calling

517
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:57,159
Speaker 2: you for that. You know you're not that friend, but

518
00:27:57,200 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 2: you're still a friend. You're my party friend. We get

519
00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:00,399
Speaker 2: in the clubs for you together.

520
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:07,800
Speaker 3: You know these levels to this ship. It's levels to friendships.

521
00:28:07,800 --> 00:28:10,400
Speaker 3: But to be a young person and just not have

522
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:14,879
Speaker 3: no Yeah, as women, women, that's the one thing we

523
00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,399
Speaker 3: have on men, right, men. I don't think men really

524
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:21,760
Speaker 3: cultivate like healthy relationships like women do throughout their lives.

525
00:28:21,760 --> 00:28:23,879
Speaker 3: They always say we're gonna die aloge, but usually we

526
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:26,840
Speaker 3: got somebody, Okay, it's gonna be a bitch bestie, We're

527
00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:29,080
Speaker 3: gonna be old as fuck and the nursing home together

528
00:28:29,160 --> 00:28:32,240
Speaker 3: like y'all niggas being there by y'allself. But I feel

529
00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:34,680
Speaker 3: like women, over the course of their lives, they do

530
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 3: cultivate healthy relationships, especially Black women, Like we all got like,

531
00:28:41,600 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 3: how do you get through life without girl friends? Yes?

532
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:53,360
Speaker 2: I need I got me air, Like I was talking.

533
00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:55,320
Speaker 2: So I was on the phone with this guy I've

534
00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:59,160
Speaker 2: been talking to, and I was like, so excited about

535
00:28:59,200 --> 00:29:01,320
Speaker 2: the gifts that we at giving each other because we

536
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 2: always get each other like little Christmas glasses or ornaments.

537
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:06,720
Speaker 2: And I was just telling him all the stuff I got,

538
00:29:06,720 --> 00:29:09,560
Speaker 2: and I got some really cute like a shot glass

539
00:29:09,600 --> 00:29:12,640
Speaker 2: and a really pretty cup, and he was like, y'all

540
00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:14,240
Speaker 2: gay as hell. I was like, what.

541
00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:19,000
Speaker 3: Niggas always think women gay? And he was like, I

542
00:29:19,040 --> 00:29:21,440
Speaker 3: mean you're gay back, like everybody ain't gay?

543
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,280
Speaker 2: Yeah I am. I'm not gay gay. I just be

544
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:29,520
Speaker 2: drunk gay one game. So he was like, could you

545
00:29:29,560 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 2: imagine I just come here and talk about a year

546
00:29:31,440 --> 00:29:36,000
Speaker 2: about homeboy brought me this cup. But maybe y'all niggas

547
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:38,200
Speaker 2: need to be like do that with each other. I

548
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 2: was like, that's that's the problem. That's why y'all be

549
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 2: so angry because y'all not doing nice things and with

550
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:47,400
Speaker 2: each other. You'd be like, nah, y'all gay as hell,

551
00:29:47,400 --> 00:29:51,400
Speaker 2: bought each other some cups, Like.

552
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:54,160
Speaker 3: You cannot tell niggas that women don't be eating each

553
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 3: other couchie on friends on girlfriends trips and stuff like,

554
00:29:57,240 --> 00:29:57,880
Speaker 3: are y'all sick?

555
00:29:58,440 --> 00:30:01,520
Speaker 2: I'm never eating my friends on a vacation with them.

556
00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:03,400
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure that shit goes down.

557
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:06,600
Speaker 3: And some people friends groups like they I don't know

558
00:30:06,640 --> 00:30:08,480
Speaker 3: if that's a friend though, Like what is that?

559
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 2: I don't know.

560
00:30:10,560 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure it goes down. But the majority of

561
00:30:14,720 --> 00:30:18,920
Speaker 3: the time absolutely fucking not. Okay, this is going to

562
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:20,520
Speaker 3: get away from yall, niggas.

563
00:30:20,880 --> 00:30:21,520
Speaker 2: Okay.

564
00:30:23,080 --> 00:30:26,880
Speaker 3: I found this article on very well minded dot com

565
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:31,160
Speaker 3: and it says I don't need friends. Why you might

566
00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:35,680
Speaker 3: feel this way Sometimes it feels better to be alone. Now.

567
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,160
Speaker 3: I am one for isolation a little bit me too,

568
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:42,280
Speaker 3: But if it's like a mental health thing, why you're isolating, like,

569
00:30:42,600 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 3: you'll find that actually being with people like mine, you

570
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:49,440
Speaker 3: got some things in common with, can actually pull you

571
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 3: out of at the place face yeah, because if it's

572
00:30:53,040 --> 00:30:55,920
Speaker 3: a healthy isolation, like you like, look, I got deadlines

573
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 3: for shit, like I'm I'm grinding, I'm focused. But if

574
00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:02,360
Speaker 3: it's a I'm depressed. I don't have no friends type

575
00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 3: shit in the house every weekend.

576
00:31:04,480 --> 00:31:05,720
Speaker 2: That might be a problem.

577
00:31:05,880 --> 00:31:07,600
Speaker 3: You might need to if you don't have any friends,

578
00:31:07,600 --> 00:31:09,000
Speaker 3: at least get a therapist.

579
00:31:09,440 --> 00:31:13,080
Speaker 2: Sometimes I isolate myself because my social barometer is just

580
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:16,440
Speaker 2: completely diminished. Like I don't have nothing. I talk to

581
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:18,880
Speaker 2: bitches all day. Listen when you do hair, you are

582
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,800
Speaker 2: a therapist. I don't care what nobody say. I listen

583
00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:24,280
Speaker 2: to people's stories. I laugh the inn. I always tell

584
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:26,480
Speaker 2: them the entertainment is free because I'm always in here

585
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,760
Speaker 2: entertaining while I'm doing the hair. But then I have

586
00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:31,680
Speaker 2: my friends, my relationships, and like me and you had

587
00:31:31,680 --> 00:31:34,520
Speaker 2: a conversation yesterday and it was really about some personal shit,

588
00:31:34,680 --> 00:31:37,800
Speaker 2: you know, that we talked about. And sometimes it can

589
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:40,960
Speaker 2: be heavy, and then I'm talking over here, I'm talking

590
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,640
Speaker 2: over there. Sometimes I just have to go in the

591
00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 2: house and shut the fuck up. Then I gotta come

592
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 2: on this shit and talk to y'all. Sometimes I just

593
00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,400
Speaker 2: have to shut the fuck up for a little while

594
00:31:50,440 --> 00:31:55,560
Speaker 2: and just close all communication off because I'm over stimulated. Yes,

595
00:31:55,640 --> 00:31:56,200
Speaker 2: that's meager.

596
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:59,920
Speaker 3: I definitely get tired of talking, okay, especially some shit happened.

597
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:01,640
Speaker 3: I feel like I got a call everybody I know

598
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:04,000
Speaker 3: tell them what happened. But I am learning to not

599
00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:08,240
Speaker 3: do that. You sound like a broken record after a while, Like,

600
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:10,360
Speaker 3: and I really have anxiety at the end of the

601
00:32:10,440 --> 00:32:12,200
Speaker 3: day after I talk to all these bitches about the

602
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 3: same thing and total same fucking story.

603
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 2: M M. Have you ever called somebody to tell the

604
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:19,880
Speaker 2: story and then before you started, You'm like, I don't

605
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,760
Speaker 2: even want to tell that story, an Moore, I'm tired

606
00:32:21,800 --> 00:32:23,720
Speaker 2: of telling it. I like, you know what, never mine,

607
00:32:23,760 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 2: don't even worry about it.

608
00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 3: Don't worry about it, man, I'm sick of it. I'm

609
00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:28,040
Speaker 3: actually over it.

610
00:32:28,600 --> 00:32:31,880
Speaker 2: No love story short, Fuck that, nigga.

611
00:32:32,080 --> 00:32:35,600
Speaker 3: That's what I was calling to say, exactly. So it

612
00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:37,960
Speaker 3: says there are many reasons you might say I don't

613
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:41,880
Speaker 3: need friends, or you may simply wonder why don't I

614
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:46,240
Speaker 3: have friends. One explanation is that you might feel that relationship,

615
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:49,760
Speaker 3: that friendship doesn't offer a lot of value in your life.

616
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:53,360
Speaker 3: Another is that you could already have plenty of social

617
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:57,120
Speaker 3: support from family. Family and friends is different things, so

618
00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:59,640
Speaker 3: you don't need a wide circle of friends or acquaintances.

619
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:03,600
Speaker 3: Whatever your reasons, it can be helpful to learn why

620
00:33:03,640 --> 00:33:06,640
Speaker 3: you might feel you don't need friends or don't have friends.

621
00:33:07,000 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 3: To understand how calmon this is and to know some

622
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:13,000
Speaker 3: of the benefits of making friends, we also share things

623
00:33:13,360 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 3: you can do if you decide to add more friendships

624
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,000
Speaker 3: to your life. So it says reasons you feel like

625
00:33:19,000 --> 00:33:21,240
Speaker 3: you don't need friends. It says if you feel like

626
00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:23,440
Speaker 3: you don't have friends in your life, there are a

627
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:26,120
Speaker 3: few different reasons why you might feel this way. They

628
00:33:26,160 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 3: include you prefer solitudes. We just said that, So it

629
00:33:29,440 --> 00:33:32,280
Speaker 3: says some people prefer solitude over being in the company

630
00:33:32,280 --> 00:33:36,480
Speaker 3: of others, particularly people who are more introverted. I hate

631
00:33:36,480 --> 00:33:39,880
Speaker 3: all these labels, so I'm introvert and extrovert. I think

632
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:43,960
Speaker 3: the word is actually imbivert like you both. Like I'm

633
00:33:44,080 --> 00:33:46,440
Speaker 3: gonna be in a social setting and social seting social setting,

634
00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:48,640
Speaker 3: and all of a sudden, I need to fucking recharge, bitch,

635
00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:51,600
Speaker 3: and I'm sneaking out the back. Don't I't even telling

636
00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:54,680
Speaker 3: nobody I'm leaving. I'm out because I feel like way

637
00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:58,600
Speaker 3: every time I go someplace, like I'm entertainment every time.

638
00:33:59,240 --> 00:34:01,520
Speaker 3: Like if I go and don't talk, it's a problem,

639
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:02,960
Speaker 3: Like which wrong, don't you, bitch?

640
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:07,200
Speaker 2: See I can't just never be off. Oh no, I

641
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:10,520
Speaker 2: will shut off. Like when I get into social environments.

642
00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:12,960
Speaker 2: I kind of like got to fill the room out

643
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:16,879
Speaker 2: before I get the cutting up. So I'll just I'll

644
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:20,200
Speaker 2: look or I'll observe for a long time before i

645
00:34:20,280 --> 00:34:27,480
Speaker 2: even let people see my personality. You real quiet in

646
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:38,040
Speaker 2: the corner, and now drugs bitch is alcohol? Speaking of friends,

647
00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:40,600
Speaker 2: let me just say this before you continue. I just

648
00:34:40,640 --> 00:34:45,239
Speaker 2: want to thank so many of y'all slid into my

649
00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:49,799
Speaker 2: DMS and sent me encouraging words after listening to me

650
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:55,160
Speaker 2: crying on the Thanksgiving episode. I know, and I really

651
00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,480
Speaker 2: really y'all don't know how much y'all touched me with

652
00:34:57,560 --> 00:35:01,920
Speaker 2: y'all encouraging words and all you're you know, sharing your

653
00:35:01,960 --> 00:35:05,520
Speaker 2: own situations with me. So I really really really love y'all.

654
00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:06,520
Speaker 2: Y'all my friends.

655
00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:08,839
Speaker 3: I love your community.

656
00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 2: And I really appreciate that. But okay, go ahead with

657
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 2: your listen.

658
00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:17,640
Speaker 3: So it says you fair disappointment. Like other social connections,

659
00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:21,879
Speaker 3: friendship comes with expectations and a need for give and take.

660
00:35:22,040 --> 00:35:25,319
Speaker 3: If you're afraid that you can't live up to these

661
00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:29,040
Speaker 3: expectations or think that others will let you down, you

662
00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:32,279
Speaker 3: might avoid friendships as a way to minimize the risk

663
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:36,320
Speaker 3: of being disappointed or disappointing others.

664
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:44,640
Speaker 2: What do you think about that as a different mechanism.

665
00:35:44,920 --> 00:35:46,759
Speaker 2: I think that's you know, a lot of people are

666
00:35:46,960 --> 00:35:50,759
Speaker 2: in romantic relationships for the same reason you know, So yeah,

667
00:35:50,800 --> 00:35:54,240
Speaker 2: I think that's a real thing, because sometimes I find

668
00:35:54,239 --> 00:35:58,719
Speaker 2: myself like spending time with men who I know I

669
00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:00,840
Speaker 2: don't see nothing with because it's safer.

670
00:36:07,040 --> 00:36:08,760
Speaker 3: Full of ship, bitch, is what I heard.

671
00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:12,520
Speaker 2: No, because I be scared. I'd be scared.

672
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:18,840
Speaker 3: I'd be scared. So for me, my romantic relationships versus

673
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:24,680
Speaker 3: my friendships, I require the same thing, love and respect.

674
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:27,239
Speaker 3: I might want a little extra from the men, though

675
00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:30,640
Speaker 3: I need some motherfucking money and protection. Okay, but I

676
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:34,799
Speaker 3: don't really have high expectations from women. But I have

677
00:36:35,040 --> 00:36:42,759
Speaker 3: had friends who are very, very, very needy friends, and

678
00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:48,440
Speaker 3: it can get exhausting emotionally trying to cater to or

679
00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:52,000
Speaker 3: it's like you're walking on eggshells with a woman, Like

680
00:36:52,040 --> 00:36:54,960
Speaker 3: I don't fuck bitches. I don't want to have to

681
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:55,360
Speaker 3: be in a.

682
00:36:57,880 --> 00:36:58,160
Speaker 2: No.

683
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:02,160
Speaker 3: Uh, let me give example. Well, one of my friends

684
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,000
Speaker 3: who I'm no longer friends would like I mean this

685
00:37:04,120 --> 00:37:05,680
Speaker 3: was a best friend. This is like a bitch I'm

686
00:37:05,680 --> 00:37:08,759
Speaker 3: talking to every day for years. We met in two

687
00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:10,759
Speaker 3: thousand and five. I think we started being friends like

688
00:37:12,400 --> 00:37:17,480
Speaker 3: during COVID sometime. So imagine like this person being constant.

689
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:20,239
Speaker 3: It's devastating. It's like, bitch, you know my life. I

690
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:22,160
Speaker 3: don't like that, Like why you get the store walking around?

691
00:37:22,160 --> 00:37:24,480
Speaker 3: I know what I said that. I mean that shit though, Like, bitch,

692
00:37:25,480 --> 00:37:27,680
Speaker 3: you know my secrets. You're just out here with my

693
00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:30,400
Speaker 3: fucking secrets. I got a problem with that. Yeah, but

694
00:37:30,560 --> 00:37:33,800
Speaker 3: she was so needy and the things that came out

695
00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:37,040
Speaker 3: in the days leading up to us, like breaking up.

696
00:37:38,000 --> 00:37:41,000
Speaker 3: It was the weirdest thing for me, you know, because

697
00:37:41,080 --> 00:37:46,399
Speaker 3: I give people space. I give people like if I

698
00:37:46,440 --> 00:37:49,640
Speaker 3: and let me go back a bit because one of

699
00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:52,600
Speaker 3: my guy friends I was texting with his dad died

700
00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:56,600
Speaker 3: last year, right, and he had texted me he was

701
00:37:56,640 --> 00:38:00,879
Speaker 3: saying that and he's my Gemini twin, So he had

702
00:38:00,880 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 3: put on social media that he was he was sitting

703
00:38:03,160 --> 00:38:04,759
Speaker 3: in front of his dad's grave and he was like,

704
00:38:04,840 --> 00:38:07,000
Speaker 3: he didn't realize he was depressed until he's like said

705
00:38:07,040 --> 00:38:09,920
Speaker 3: some things out loud at his dad's grave and he

706
00:38:10,040 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 3: was saying how he lives in New England, so he

707
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:16,440
Speaker 3: was like, you know up north. He was saying how

708
00:38:16,640 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 3: he didn't realize like the people he thought he had

709
00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:21,800
Speaker 3: here back.

710
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:24,200
Speaker 2: In Charleston just weren't his friends because they didn't really.

711
00:38:24,000 --> 00:38:25,759
Speaker 3: Call and check on him. Now, I remember I didn't

712
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:29,040
Speaker 3: call him when his dad died. I text. And that's

713
00:38:29,080 --> 00:38:31,839
Speaker 3: because when things happened, I kind of and this and

714
00:38:31,880 --> 00:38:36,440
Speaker 3: this is emotional intelligence, right that I may have lacked

715
00:38:36,440 --> 00:38:38,480
Speaker 3: in that moment, right because I was thinking about like

716
00:38:38,520 --> 00:38:40,600
Speaker 3: how I would want because what can you do when

717
00:38:40,600 --> 00:38:44,279
Speaker 3: somebody family passed away? You gonna get a hundred text

718
00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:47,160
Speaker 3: messages and calls the same thing, and nothing can make

719
00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:50,040
Speaker 3: that pain go away, especially the loss of a parent. Right,

720
00:38:50,600 --> 00:38:52,359
Speaker 3: So at the time I was just thinking like what

721
00:38:52,400 --> 00:38:55,160
Speaker 3: I would need in that moment, and then now knowing

722
00:38:55,200 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 3: that he was he's actually depressed, and I didn't call, Like,

723
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,520
Speaker 3: I feel like I dropped the ball because at some

724
00:39:02,640 --> 00:39:05,440
Speaker 3: point I should have called, but I didn't because I

725
00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:07,360
Speaker 3: just feel like, like when I'm out the shell, I

726
00:39:07,440 --> 00:39:09,880
Speaker 3: reach out to people like when I need my downtime,

727
00:39:10,360 --> 00:39:12,400
Speaker 3: but not everybody needs us. You got to just know

728
00:39:12,520 --> 00:39:15,040
Speaker 3: your personnel. You got to know what your friend what

729
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:18,840
Speaker 3: your friend needs. But guess what, people have to explicitly

730
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:22,280
Speaker 3: state in all relationships what it is that they need,

731
00:39:22,680 --> 00:39:26,640
Speaker 3: because otherwise you want to always be disappointed with unreal real,

732
00:39:26,719 --> 00:39:31,560
Speaker 3: unrealistic expectations of people that you did not tell them

733
00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:34,359
Speaker 3: what you need. Right, That's the same thing in your

734
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:37,520
Speaker 3: romantic relationships. So I'm telling you, in the world, I

735
00:39:37,600 --> 00:39:41,000
Speaker 3: do not require much, but there are some people that

736
00:39:41,120 --> 00:39:45,840
Speaker 3: require a lot out of everybody, and it can get exhausting.

737
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:48,719
Speaker 3: So I don't want those type of friends. So I

738
00:39:48,840 --> 00:39:51,080
Speaker 3: want to be around more people that's kind of like

739
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:54,879
Speaker 3: cool with like your best friends you really don't talk

740
00:39:54,920 --> 00:39:55,759
Speaker 3: to every day.

741
00:39:56,239 --> 00:39:59,360
Speaker 2: I just said to let one of my closest friends go, honestly,

742
00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:02,400
Speaker 2: and I just felt like, no matter how hard I

743
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:05,600
Speaker 2: tried to show her that I loved her and that

744
00:40:05,719 --> 00:40:09,680
Speaker 2: I supported her, there it was never enough. The cuff

745
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,359
Speaker 2: was never there's a hole in the bottom of it

746
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:15,040
Speaker 2: and I can't feel it, and no matter how hard

747
00:40:15,080 --> 00:40:18,520
Speaker 2: I try to feel it, it's just, you know, I

748
00:40:18,640 --> 00:40:19,399
Speaker 2: just can't do it.

749
00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:23,120
Speaker 3: So I had ever ending bottomless pit.

750
00:40:23,840 --> 00:40:27,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so I don't know.

751
00:40:28,040 --> 00:40:30,120
Speaker 3: I can't. I can't do that with women especially be

752
00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:31,640
Speaker 3: cause y'all ain't given me no dick.

753
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:35,200
Speaker 2: Like, why am I jumping? I can't give you.

754
00:40:35,960 --> 00:40:39,239
Speaker 3: I don't want no goddamn dick off all nine like

755
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:45,160
Speaker 3: it gotta be warm with veins. I got that the

756
00:40:45,239 --> 00:40:51,000
Speaker 3: black dick caused more come overving no white strapper like yeah,

757
00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:53,200
Speaker 3: I like, I don't fuck women, so to have to

758
00:40:53,200 --> 00:40:55,759
Speaker 3: cater to women's like attitude. I understand some of the

759
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:59,279
Speaker 3: shit men say about women. I definitely do because you

760
00:40:59,360 --> 00:41:01,560
Speaker 3: experience of those things. I don't know why people think

761
00:41:01,560 --> 00:41:04,319
Speaker 3: that they are different and they were friends in their

762
00:41:04,360 --> 00:41:07,719
Speaker 3: friendships versus in relationships with other people like that shit

763
00:41:07,840 --> 00:41:12,160
Speaker 3: kind of translates sometimes. So your homegirl might be telling

764
00:41:12,160 --> 00:41:13,880
Speaker 3: you some shit that she going through with her boyfriend.

765
00:41:13,880 --> 00:41:15,279
Speaker 3: You'd be like, damn bit you good that to me?

766
00:41:16,040 --> 00:41:20,879
Speaker 2: Right? Some people have like character flaws man a lot.

767
00:41:20,960 --> 00:41:24,360
Speaker 2: I mean, I think we all have some type of character.

768
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:30,239
Speaker 2: For absolutely, there's no life perfect friends, but there is

769
00:41:30,280 --> 00:41:32,480
Speaker 2: people who try to be the best version of friendship

770
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:34,800
Speaker 2: that they know how to be. And that's all I want.

771
00:41:34,960 --> 00:41:37,440
Speaker 2: You know, when you make a mistake, say you sorry,

772
00:41:38,280 --> 00:41:41,840
Speaker 2: and as long as you ain't fun or slapping my mama,

773
00:41:41,880 --> 00:41:45,840
Speaker 2: we could get passed just about anything. But it's just

774
00:41:45,880 --> 00:41:49,239
Speaker 2: when I feel like I can't do enough, that's when

775
00:41:49,239 --> 00:41:49,719
Speaker 2: I got to go.

776
00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:56,680
Speaker 3: This next one says you're close to your family, you

777
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:59,480
Speaker 3: might also feel like your family members are your friends.

778
00:42:00,040 --> 00:42:02,120
Speaker 3: If they give you the connection and support you need,

779
00:42:02,160 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 3: you may feel less of a need to seek friendships

780
00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:11,760
Speaker 3: outside of your family circle. That's possible, you know, growing

781
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:14,760
Speaker 3: up as a black woman with a black mama, my mom,

782
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:18,520
Speaker 3: I remember having like a few friends growing up, but

783
00:42:18,560 --> 00:42:20,319
Speaker 3: for the most part, like one of her nieces was

784
00:42:20,320 --> 00:42:22,520
Speaker 3: like one of her best friends, and then her sister,

785
00:42:23,600 --> 00:42:26,479
Speaker 3: well actually her both of her sisters were like best friends.

786
00:42:26,560 --> 00:42:28,879
Speaker 3: My oldest her oldest sister, and my aunt passed away

787
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:31,920
Speaker 3: a while ago, but she still has like her youngest sisters,

788
00:42:31,920 --> 00:42:34,600
Speaker 3: so like they're like besties. So your family could definitely

789
00:42:34,600 --> 00:42:36,680
Speaker 3: be friends because I feel like even first cousins are

790
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:38,000
Speaker 3: like friends best friends.

791
00:42:38,040 --> 00:42:40,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I disagree with Yeah, I disagree. You can your

792
00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:42,800
Speaker 2: family because your family don't have to be your friend,

793
00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:46,440
Speaker 2: you know, right, sometimes you don't even like your family exactly.

794
00:42:46,880 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 2: If you got a family member who's also a friend,

795
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,240
Speaker 2: you're just blessed. That's a blessing as far as science.

796
00:42:52,280 --> 00:42:54,239
Speaker 3: So yeah, Like I reconnected with one of my first

797
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:56,000
Speaker 3: cousins last year and me and her have been like

798
00:42:56,000 --> 00:42:59,360
Speaker 3: this ever since, Like around this time when the October

799
00:42:59,440 --> 00:43:01,920
Speaker 3: last year, my male cousins had a birth, I had

800
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,600
Speaker 3: a wedding and from that point on, girl, we be

801
00:43:05,160 --> 00:43:07,560
Speaker 3: that's my BESTTI, Like, that's one of my best friends.

802
00:43:08,080 --> 00:43:10,279
Speaker 2: I feel like me and my sisters like right now,

803
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:13,520
Speaker 2: we've always been close, but we're the closest as adult

804
00:43:13,520 --> 00:43:16,480
Speaker 2: women than when we were like young girls and stuff

805
00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 2: like that. We just having our own And I was

806
00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:20,799
Speaker 2: telling my little sister Tany y'all, was like, girl, we are,

807
00:43:21,040 --> 00:43:22,879
Speaker 2: like you're my best friend. Like I call you every

808
00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:24,480
Speaker 2: I talk to you every day. I was like, I

809
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:26,759
Speaker 2: let you down. She's like, I was thinking about that

810
00:43:26,880 --> 00:43:29,479
Speaker 2: you used to beat my ass when I shouldn't fuck

811
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 2: with you.

812
00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:34,040
Speaker 3: Girl, the young sister always get all the abuse and

813
00:43:34,120 --> 00:43:37,640
Speaker 3: you the middle middle sister. That's about right, bitch, because

814
00:43:37,640 --> 00:43:40,239
Speaker 3: I've been trying to tell my sister Sam, she's the

815
00:43:40,280 --> 00:43:42,720
Speaker 3: middle child, right, I'm the youngest, how she used.

816
00:43:42,560 --> 00:43:46,400
Speaker 2: To abuse me. Yeah, my sister said, I'm lucky that

817
00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:47,239
Speaker 2: she even talk to me.

818
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:51,480
Speaker 3: Yes, Like, but you really used to literally was just

819
00:43:51,520 --> 00:43:53,799
Speaker 3: talking about this ship yesterday. Bit you was abusive as

820
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:56,719
Speaker 3: fuck to me until I realized I could fight.

821
00:43:57,840 --> 00:43:59,960
Speaker 2: I was like, I was just making you tough for her.

822
00:44:00,080 --> 00:44:04,560
Speaker 2: The world is hard, prepare you for retarded?

823
00:44:05,120 --> 00:44:07,240
Speaker 3: Nobody can ever love the middle child enough.

824
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:12,720
Speaker 4: Yeah, I to this day like I'm my daddy's baby

825
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:14,960
Speaker 4: and my oldest sister is like, she's close to my mama,

826
00:44:15,040 --> 00:44:17,400
Speaker 4: and so Sam just in the fucking middle feeling like

827
00:44:17,480 --> 00:44:18,960
Speaker 4: nobody knows her all the time.

828
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:20,760
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, y'all weird.

829
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:24,879
Speaker 3: This next one says you don't want to get hurt.

830
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:27,560
Speaker 3: If you've been deeply hurt by a friend in the past,

831
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:30,439
Speaker 3: you might have trust issues. As a result, you might

832
00:44:30,480 --> 00:44:33,720
Speaker 3: be hesitant to begin new friendships with others.

833
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:37,280
Speaker 2: I like meeting new people. Me too. I like hearing

834
00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:38,880
Speaker 2: people little stories and ship like.

835
00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 3: I'm nosy, bitch, Tell me I'm never like a no

836
00:44:43,800 --> 00:44:44,799
Speaker 3: new friend type bitch.

837
00:44:45,160 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 2: How you get that scar on your leg? I want

838
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:49,320
Speaker 2: to hear about it. I'm not like I want to

839
00:44:49,360 --> 00:44:51,120
Speaker 2: hear about everything that happened in life.

840
00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:58,560
Speaker 3: I have friends that I met through other friends and

841
00:44:58,560 --> 00:45:03,040
Speaker 3: friends no more, and I'm still friends with both of them.

842
00:45:03,120 --> 00:45:04,959
Speaker 2: So I don't know, i'd be me and friends.

843
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:06,600
Speaker 3: I mean, when I moved to Saint Louis, I met

844
00:45:06,600 --> 00:45:12,640
Speaker 3: my homegirl Ryan in the club, met a whole friend, and.

845
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was my first friend I met em.

846
00:45:18,719 --> 00:45:21,640
Speaker 3: You're too busy. Building and maintaining friendships takes time, and

847
00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:24,200
Speaker 3: y'all twenty five year old bitches ain't doing shit. H

848
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:27,120
Speaker 3: takes time and effort. If you are busy with other

849
00:45:27,200 --> 00:45:30,359
Speaker 3: obligations such as family, work, school, you might simply feel

850
00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:33,799
Speaker 3: like you don't have time or energy to devote to friends.

851
00:45:34,320 --> 00:45:38,960
Speaker 2: I have a friend who is my ex boyfriends. Uh,

852
00:45:39,080 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 2: well they were girl. It was his girlfriend and he

853
00:45:41,640 --> 00:45:46,200
Speaker 2: introduced me to her and we became friends. And now

854
00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:48,160
Speaker 2: they don't go together either, and me and her are

855
00:45:48,200 --> 00:45:53,800
Speaker 2: still friends, but we both dated him. This comes a

856
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:57,840
Speaker 2: wild right, did y'all have a No? It was not

857
00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:03,680
Speaker 2: that a little throble, this says.

858
00:46:03,719 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 3: According to the twenty twenty one American Perspective Survey, forty

859
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:11,640
Speaker 3: nine percent of adults said they had three or fewer

860
00:46:11,719 --> 00:46:13,440
Speaker 3: friends close friends.

861
00:46:14,239 --> 00:46:15,200
Speaker 2: With this breakdown.

862
00:46:15,520 --> 00:46:24,440
Speaker 3: Generate generalation, general girl generalation pounded out baby generationally, that's

863
00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:28,319
Speaker 3: not that's right, I don't know generational generationally, there you go,

864
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:30,640
Speaker 3: I got there.

865
00:46:31,760 --> 00:46:33,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, I say yay.

866
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:37,760
Speaker 3: Twenty seven percent of millennials reported having no close friends.

867
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:42,040
Speaker 3: Twenty two percent reported having no friends at all. That's millennials,

868
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:47,080
Speaker 3: that's US. Sixteen percent of Generation xers report not having

869
00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:51,080
Speaker 3: any friends. Nine percent of Baby boom mercee they have

870
00:46:51,239 --> 00:46:51,880
Speaker 3: no friends.

871
00:46:53,640 --> 00:46:59,480
Speaker 2: That's so sad. How How how do y'all not have nobody?

872
00:46:59,600 --> 00:47:02,440
Speaker 3: Like? And maybe that's one of the events events. I

873
00:47:02,440 --> 00:47:04,200
Speaker 3: feel like we talked about that before, like doing like

874
00:47:04,280 --> 00:47:06,399
Speaker 3: a friend show.

875
00:47:06,520 --> 00:47:10,000
Speaker 2: Let's say, yeah, let's make friends, speed speed.

876
00:47:09,719 --> 00:47:12,920
Speaker 3: Friends, because how do you get through life without somebody?

877
00:47:12,960 --> 00:47:15,840
Speaker 3: You gotta have somebody you can call and talk to,

878
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:19,759
Speaker 3: like outside of a therapist. That might be where it

879
00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:21,560
Speaker 3: starts for a lot of people, because you need to

880
00:47:21,600 --> 00:47:25,040
Speaker 3: explore why it is that you can't make real connection

881
00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 3: with other people aside from being busy in school and

882
00:47:30,080 --> 00:47:31,000
Speaker 3: all those other things.

883
00:47:31,480 --> 00:47:35,080
Speaker 2: Right, Like, because even in those environments you know, you

884
00:47:35,200 --> 00:47:38,840
Speaker 2: make relationships or work, you have work friends. You know,

885
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:40,920
Speaker 2: some people go to work and don't talk to nobody

886
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:43,920
Speaker 2: and don't come home. And I saw this thing where

887
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:46,399
Speaker 2: a woman said that she had roaches and those were

888
00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:47,360
Speaker 2: her only friends.

889
00:47:47,440 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 3: Girls shut up, not Joe's apartment.

890
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:52,560
Speaker 2: Who Joseph, this was a woman.

891
00:47:53,080 --> 00:47:56,319
Speaker 3: I know Joe's apartment, ass bitch, Like what your roaches is?

892
00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:59,000
Speaker 2: The friends? It? Girl? It was so it was the

893
00:47:59,040 --> 00:48:03,440
Speaker 2: saddest thing and nasty. It was nasty, but it was

894
00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:06,839
Speaker 2: sad because these were the only friends she had in

895
00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:07,360
Speaker 2: the world.

896
00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:10,640
Speaker 3: Wait were they in he marriam or like running in

897
00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 3: the house?

898
00:48:11,160 --> 00:48:15,040
Speaker 2: Roaches? She had a roach infestation in her home and

899
00:48:15,120 --> 00:48:17,719
Speaker 2: she viewed them as her friends. And she didn't have

900
00:48:17,760 --> 00:48:20,319
Speaker 2: no family, and she worked and come home and didn't

901
00:48:20,360 --> 00:48:23,000
Speaker 2: have no friends. And she just said that that was

902
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:25,160
Speaker 2: the only friend she had was in roaches in her house.

903
00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:27,040
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure she was taking some of them roaches

904
00:48:27,080 --> 00:48:30,399
Speaker 3: to work with her and they when people saw that shit,

905
00:48:31,080 --> 00:48:34,080
Speaker 3: people didn't want to be your friends. Got that shit, Like, girl,

906
00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:37,320
Speaker 3: we see roaches in your car in the parking.

907
00:48:37,080 --> 00:48:41,319
Speaker 2: Lot, Yeah, they got the roaches. She didn't because her

908
00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:43,799
Speaker 2: infestation got so bad because she didn't want to get

909
00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:46,399
Speaker 2: rid of them because then she wouldn't have nobody. Ain't

910
00:48:46,440 --> 00:48:49,040
Speaker 2: that sad? That poor baby? That thing broke my heart

911
00:48:49,080 --> 00:48:53,160
Speaker 2: for her. Look at your face? What's the next thing

912
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:53,760
Speaker 2: on the article?

913
00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:55,879
Speaker 3: Because if she would clean that damn house. She would

914
00:48:55,960 --> 00:48:59,000
Speaker 3: have some friends. You can't invite people over that. See,

915
00:48:59,000 --> 00:49:02,400
Speaker 3: that's she had a mental health issue. I she didn't

916
00:49:02,400 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 3: have any friends. It didn't have nothing to do with

917
00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:08,200
Speaker 3: like nobody not wanting to be her friend and she

918
00:49:08,239 --> 00:49:09,560
Speaker 3: can only depend on roaches.

919
00:49:10,719 --> 00:49:15,359
Speaker 2: But just how lonely it must be to decide that

920
00:49:15,440 --> 00:49:17,880
Speaker 2: the only friends you have is these roaches in your house,

921
00:49:18,200 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 2: and that's why you don't want to get rid of them.

922
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:23,920
Speaker 2: She was depressed. That's so sad that that was. And

923
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 2: she was a black woman too. I know.

924
00:49:32,040 --> 00:49:36,520
Speaker 3: You're terrible, but you little fucking figure as empathy.

925
00:49:36,640 --> 00:49:40,880
Speaker 2: Oh my god. No, you had to see what was

926
00:49:41,600 --> 00:49:45,080
Speaker 2: on the Instagram. I can find that video. She was like,

927
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:47,840
Speaker 2: I don't have anyone else and it was just so sad.

928
00:49:49,000 --> 00:49:52,480
Speaker 2: It wasn't fake, all right.

929
00:49:52,520 --> 00:49:55,560
Speaker 3: So anyway, so here now are the benefits of actually

930
00:49:55,600 --> 00:49:57,960
Speaker 3: having friends, right, so you don't have to have roaches

931
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:01,960
Speaker 3: as your friends. Somebody p I don't know, okay, It

932
00:50:02,040 --> 00:50:06,120
Speaker 3: says reduced stress and anxiety. Even if you think you

933
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:09,520
Speaker 3: don't need them, having a social circle to support you

934
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:13,120
Speaker 3: can be important for your health, for your mental health

935
00:50:13,280 --> 00:50:15,920
Speaker 3: and well being. Research has found that having a social

936
00:50:15,920 --> 00:50:20,480
Speaker 3: support system is associated with less stress and anxiety. So

937
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:22,840
Speaker 3: when men said they don't have anybody to talk to,

938
00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:26,040
Speaker 3: y'all need to get some fucking homeboys that have actual

939
00:50:26,120 --> 00:50:29,120
Speaker 3: sense that you can have a conversation with, you can

940
00:50:29,120 --> 00:50:32,200
Speaker 3: converse with. I feel like women do a pretty good job.

941
00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:34,040
Speaker 3: I mean, because you you you good at it. You

942
00:50:34,040 --> 00:50:37,160
Speaker 3: call and be like, girl, can I impack on you?

943
00:50:37,160 --> 00:50:39,640
Speaker 2: You got a moment? You got a mental health break moment?

944
00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:44,480
Speaker 2: For me, I always I try to ask and I'm like, hey,

945
00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:51,319
Speaker 2: how you doing. You have to bandwidth on you right now?

946
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:55,279
Speaker 3: That is so considerate, Like, bitch, Yeah, because I had

947
00:50:55,280 --> 00:50:57,520
Speaker 3: a friend who had who I had to let go of. Bitch,

948
00:50:57,560 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 3: I'll be because I am one of those people who

949
00:50:59,760 --> 00:51:02,279
Speaker 3: don't tell people what I'm going through. I just get

950
00:51:02,280 --> 00:51:03,759
Speaker 3: through it and I might tell you about it when

951
00:51:03,760 --> 00:51:05,879
Speaker 3: it's over. Like one side, I got through, Like, girl,

952
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:07,120
Speaker 3: let me tell you what the fuck I've been going

953
00:51:07,120 --> 00:51:08,200
Speaker 3: through for the last six months.

954
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:08,560
Speaker 2: That's me.

955
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:12,400
Speaker 3: But I would literally be going through shit like driving

956
00:51:12,480 --> 00:51:14,760
Speaker 3: or something, and she's like calling me with a whole

957
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:18,280
Speaker 3: mental health crisis on the phone, and I'm like, bitch,

958
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:21,440
Speaker 3: you can't do this to people. You can literally like,

959
00:51:21,520 --> 00:51:25,320
Speaker 3: you don't know other people's mental state when you add

960
00:51:25,640 --> 00:51:31,360
Speaker 3: an extra peace, don't because everybody's going through something. Everybody

961
00:51:31,440 --> 00:51:33,919
Speaker 3: is going through it. May may it be that they're

962
00:51:33,960 --> 00:51:35,520
Speaker 3: you know, verbal about it about it or not.

963
00:51:36,040 --> 00:51:38,000
Speaker 2: People be going through shit. Man, You're not the only

964
00:51:38,040 --> 00:51:43,040
Speaker 2: one I know. And I started practicing that to ask

965
00:51:43,080 --> 00:51:45,680
Speaker 2: people can they handle it first before I do that,

966
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 2: because just by being a hairstylist, people coming here and

967
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:53,600
Speaker 2: dump on top of me boom boom, Well grandma, dad

968
00:51:53,600 --> 00:51:57,000
Speaker 2: and my husband cheese, somebody sick. This happened like all

969
00:51:57,080 --> 00:52:00,279
Speaker 2: day long. I'm just listening to people problems. Some times

970
00:52:00,320 --> 00:52:03,600
Speaker 2: I leave feeling so heavy, and I know, like that's

971
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:06,320
Speaker 2: kind of part of the job a little bit. Sometimes

972
00:52:06,320 --> 00:52:08,319
Speaker 2: I'll be like ready to just put on a movie, girl,

973
00:52:08,360 --> 00:52:12,560
Speaker 2: watch this. I can't handle nobody else shit. But so

974
00:52:13,280 --> 00:52:15,880
Speaker 2: I started practicing that just because I get dumped on

975
00:52:15,960 --> 00:52:18,440
Speaker 2: so much. You know, have you ever.

976
00:52:18,320 --> 00:52:21,240
Speaker 3: Stopped somebody like while they dumping, Like, girl, I really

977
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:24,440
Speaker 3: don't got it today, Like I have the capacity today

978
00:52:24,480 --> 00:52:24,719
Speaker 3: for this.

979
00:52:25,760 --> 00:52:30,160
Speaker 2: I have, yeah that It ain't that I don't care.

980
00:52:30,280 --> 00:52:32,920
Speaker 2: I just I can't handle it today. I'm so sorry.

981
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:35,920
Speaker 2: I love you. I love you so much, and I

982
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:39,160
Speaker 2: want to be there for you, but right now I'm

983
00:52:39,200 --> 00:52:40,719
Speaker 2: trying to be there for me a little bit, and

984
00:52:40,760 --> 00:52:43,799
Speaker 2: I can't help you today with that. But I can

985
00:52:43,840 --> 00:52:46,200
Speaker 2: try to put something on that can uplift us both.

986
00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:49,320
Speaker 2: Would you like that? Like maybe I can put music

987
00:52:49,400 --> 00:52:52,799
Speaker 2: on or a movie that might uplift both of our spirits.

988
00:52:53,080 --> 00:52:54,920
Speaker 2: And that's how I deal it. And usually, I mean,

989
00:52:55,520 --> 00:52:57,840
Speaker 2: you can't get mad at that, Like, baby, I do

990
00:52:57,960 --> 00:53:03,640
Speaker 2: not have it for you today, So that's not selfish.

991
00:53:04,000 --> 00:53:08,040
Speaker 3: Less loneliness friendship is also linked to less loneliness. Loneliness

992
00:53:08,080 --> 00:53:11,319
Speaker 3: can excuse me. Loneliness has been shown to take a

993
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:14,960
Speaker 3: serious toll on health and mortality. Studies have found that

994
00:53:15,000 --> 00:53:18,480
Speaker 3: people who have quality friendships are better able to cope

995
00:53:18,520 --> 00:53:22,320
Speaker 3: with stress, and are even less likely to experience stress

996
00:53:22,360 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 3: in the first place. Being happy is a choice, that's

997
00:53:27,840 --> 00:53:28,440
Speaker 3: my cursing.

998
00:53:29,320 --> 00:53:30,640
Speaker 2: So every day you got to you.

999
00:53:30,560 --> 00:53:34,520
Speaker 3: Gotta do something like that that you like doing that

1000
00:53:34,920 --> 00:53:38,000
Speaker 3: makes you smile, or just actually just practice smiling.

1001
00:53:39,000 --> 00:53:40,440
Speaker 2: Right, that might attract some friends.

1002
00:53:40,480 --> 00:53:42,279
Speaker 3: They said, black one be around here with rest and

1003
00:53:42,320 --> 00:53:45,400
Speaker 3: bitch face, Like you're not even inviting to make a

1004
00:53:45,400 --> 00:53:49,919
Speaker 3: friend smile, bitch, But y'all, niggas don't be telling women

1005
00:53:49,960 --> 00:53:50,320
Speaker 3: to smile.

1006
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:53,719
Speaker 2: Ain't for y'all. This is where women don't be telling us.

1007
00:53:53,840 --> 00:53:57,880
Speaker 2: We're talking to YouTube nigga when we say loud, bitch, smile,

1008
00:53:57,960 --> 00:53:59,800
Speaker 2: bitch better.

1009
00:54:00,040 --> 00:54:03,360
Speaker 3: Emotional support. Friends can also offer emotional support when you

1010
00:54:03,400 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 3: need it. Friends can help validate your emotions, listen to

1011
00:54:06,200 --> 00:54:09,040
Speaker 3: your problems, and do things to help you feel better.

1012
00:54:09,320 --> 00:54:11,520
Speaker 3: So now we all want friends that just be yes men,

1013
00:54:11,560 --> 00:54:13,719
Speaker 3: though I don't think that's healthy even so, when you

1014
00:54:13,840 --> 00:54:16,160
Speaker 3: fucking up like you should have a solid group of friends,

1015
00:54:16,160 --> 00:54:21,319
Speaker 3: gonna tay girl, you want some bullshit right now and love, relationships, finances,

1016
00:54:21,360 --> 00:54:23,480
Speaker 3: whatever it is, like if they just feel like you're

1017
00:54:23,600 --> 00:54:27,160
Speaker 3: just not showing up as your best self, like your

1018
00:54:27,160 --> 00:54:29,239
Speaker 3: friends should be able to tall they know you, they

1019
00:54:29,280 --> 00:54:35,520
Speaker 3: know you. Yeah, a feeling of belonging. Howing friends can

1020
00:54:36,120 --> 00:54:39,120
Speaker 3: help you feel as if belonging to something that brings

1021
00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:41,160
Speaker 3: purpose and connection to your life. We need telling you

1022
00:54:41,200 --> 00:54:43,640
Speaker 3: to go join the crips or I get a nice,

1023
00:54:43,640 --> 00:54:46,920
Speaker 3: solid group of women that's actually actively doing shit out here.

1024
00:54:47,200 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 2: But your community no basically going to jail.

1025
00:54:51,080 --> 00:54:53,279
Speaker 3: They're really gonna have like a lot of friends for

1026
00:54:53,320 --> 00:54:54,440
Speaker 3: a long time.

1027
00:54:54,239 --> 00:54:58,200
Speaker 2: But I know people will or love me all right, I.

1028
00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:05,480
Speaker 3: Improve physical health. Having strong friends will tell you your

1029
00:55:05,520 --> 00:55:08,920
Speaker 3: back is getting big as a bitch. You know it's

1030
00:55:08,480 --> 00:55:12,480
Speaker 3: just having strong friends can also that article really say

1031
00:55:14,000 --> 00:55:16,800
Speaker 3: it also help you to improve your physical health. Friends

1032
00:55:16,880 --> 00:55:19,680
Speaker 3: might increase the chances of you doing daily tasks such

1033
00:55:19,719 --> 00:55:23,399
Speaker 3: as exercise and eating well. Even if it's a competition. Bitch,

1034
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:26,680
Speaker 3: if you're won't be fat and your friends can, I

1035
00:55:26,680 --> 00:55:27,600
Speaker 3: think it.

1036
00:55:28,120 --> 00:55:29,839
Speaker 2: I think me and you compete to see who can

1037
00:55:29,920 --> 00:55:33,200
Speaker 2: get the fattest. Bitch.

1038
00:55:33,200 --> 00:55:37,520
Speaker 3: I've worked out today, okay today, and I'm gonna try

1039
00:55:37,719 --> 00:55:41,200
Speaker 3: try real hard tomorrow. But your friends do hold you accountable,

1040
00:55:41,280 --> 00:55:44,600
Speaker 3: like it is like when you have friends that like

1041
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:47,640
Speaker 3: everybody on the same little workout kick, like you do

1042
00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:50,240
Speaker 3: tend to lose weight when you need to if everybody

1043
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:52,359
Speaker 3: on the same wave ship.

1044
00:55:52,600 --> 00:55:55,480
Speaker 2: But you also can make friends in the gym if

1045
00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:58,560
Speaker 2: you if you're enough, you think, well, all right.

1046
00:55:59,560 --> 00:56:02,399
Speaker 3: The black women don't speak in the gym. And I'm

1047
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:04,840
Speaker 3: saying black women because I'm only speaking from our perspective,

1048
00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:07,000
Speaker 3: Like I do have one white friend, but I'm just

1049
00:56:07,040 --> 00:56:09,759
Speaker 3: saying in our community. Because you know, you love a

1050
00:56:09,840 --> 00:56:11,120
Speaker 3: devil's advocate.

1051
00:56:10,920 --> 00:56:11,760
Speaker 2: In the gym.

1052
00:56:12,120 --> 00:56:14,320
Speaker 3: There are white women and black women. When I tell you,

1053
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:16,960
Speaker 3: the white bitches they know they see you four days

1054
00:56:16,960 --> 00:56:20,600
Speaker 3: out the week. They're telling you hi girl. The black

1055
00:56:20,640 --> 00:56:24,640
Speaker 3: women don't give your eye contact to say hi. Ever.

1056
00:56:26,800 --> 00:56:29,920
Speaker 2: You know what I be looking at walking to talk

1057
00:56:30,040 --> 00:56:32,920
Speaker 2: about that in the gym. I don't really have friends

1058
00:56:33,080 --> 00:56:36,880
Speaker 2: in the gym with spin class. Oh yeah, I mean

1059
00:56:36,960 --> 00:56:41,480
Speaker 2: friends and spin. Yeah yeah, it's more. I guess it's

1060
00:56:41,480 --> 00:56:46,280
Speaker 2: because of the same petition. Yeah yeah, so I missed

1061
00:56:46,280 --> 00:56:48,319
Speaker 2: my spin class. I can't I can't wait to get

1062
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:49,319
Speaker 2: this foot back to roller.

1063
00:56:54,080 --> 00:56:55,960
Speaker 3: No, I know you gotta wrap this up, but listen,

1064
00:56:55,960 --> 00:56:57,879
Speaker 3: the one thing, one other thing I wanted to add

1065
00:56:57,880 --> 00:56:59,440
Speaker 3: to this, which is a whole other article, and I'm

1066
00:56:59,480 --> 00:57:02,480
Speaker 3: not gonna get in the whole thing, but I think

1067
00:57:02,520 --> 00:57:09,680
Speaker 3: one problem, right, maybe the depiction of black women when

1068
00:57:09,719 --> 00:57:14,520
Speaker 3: it comes to friendships right on teaching, Right, we got

1069
00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 3: some nice shows like uh, living Single, Like that's our generation.

1070
00:57:19,640 --> 00:57:24,760
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying, Girlfriends should set it off, bitch, Okay,

1071
00:57:24,800 --> 00:57:28,080
Speaker 3: Like that's still girls depending on each other.

1072
00:57:29,720 --> 00:57:31,200
Speaker 2: I don't know if that was the best exit.

1073
00:57:33,720 --> 00:57:35,360
Speaker 3: Might have to set it off one day you don't

1074
00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:37,240
Speaker 3: know where friends, You're gonna call us set it off?

1075
00:57:37,320 --> 00:57:43,400
Speaker 3: I do shit, Priscilla, Priscilla ready to set the ship off. Bitch,

1076
00:57:44,680 --> 00:57:48,560
Speaker 3: that's a whole witch name right there, Bitch. You ready?

1077
00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:54,120
Speaker 2: Yeah? I do think. Like shows like Baddies and Bad

1078
00:57:54,200 --> 00:57:58,560
Speaker 2: Girls Club and even the Love and Hip Hops, you

1079
00:57:58,600 --> 00:58:03,440
Speaker 2: know they don't paint the most positive pictures of friendships

1080
00:58:03,440 --> 00:58:08,280
Speaker 2: and relationships between women because oftentimes they show them fighting.

1081
00:58:08,760 --> 00:58:13,760
Speaker 2: You know that the conflict resolution is always physical violence,

1082
00:58:14,440 --> 00:58:17,200
Speaker 2: and people in other places in the world might assume

1083
00:58:17,240 --> 00:58:20,280
Speaker 2: that that is how the only way Black women handle conflict,

1084
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:22,280
Speaker 2: and it is a part of how we do it

1085
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:25,520
Speaker 2: handle conflict. I won't sit here and pretend like shit,

1086
00:58:25,640 --> 00:58:28,000
Speaker 2: don't jump off when she gets crazy, because it can,

1087
00:58:28,200 --> 00:58:31,840
Speaker 2: but that is just not the go to, especially between

1088
00:58:31,840 --> 00:58:34,360
Speaker 2: women who are friends. We might argue, we might even

1089
00:58:34,360 --> 00:58:36,720
Speaker 2: cuss at each other, you might even be a bitch,

1090
00:58:37,240 --> 00:58:41,240
Speaker 2: but physical violence. If we hit each other, we are

1091
00:58:41,240 --> 00:58:42,160
Speaker 2: no longer friends.

1092
00:58:42,280 --> 00:58:45,880
Speaker 3: Absolutely not. You throw a drink in my face, yes

1093
00:58:45,920 --> 00:58:46,360
Speaker 3: it's over.

1094
00:58:47,000 --> 00:58:48,919
Speaker 2: If you put your hands on me one, I'm calling

1095
00:58:49,040 --> 00:58:51,720
Speaker 2: I'm too old. I'm not fighting no more. I feel

1096
00:58:51,720 --> 00:58:54,200
Speaker 2: like I'm too old. I already broke my foot. I'm

1097
00:58:54,240 --> 00:58:55,640
Speaker 2: calling the police on you.

1098
00:59:00,000 --> 00:59:03,280
Speaker 3: Life long injuries from fighting on that page of my

1099
00:59:03,320 --> 00:59:07,880
Speaker 3: life is done. That is the workout. Could you imagine

1100
00:59:07,960 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 3: that boxing for a minute?

1101
00:59:11,560 --> 00:59:14,600
Speaker 2: I do not want to do it. First of all,

1102
00:59:15,160 --> 00:59:18,040
Speaker 2: I feel too pretty to be participating in that type

1103
00:59:18,080 --> 00:59:21,440
Speaker 2: of foolish period. And the second of all, my body

1104
00:59:21,520 --> 00:59:24,360
Speaker 2: is just that I don't want to fight, litten. Can

1105
00:59:24,400 --> 00:59:28,800
Speaker 2: we talk talk about it? So?

1106
00:59:28,880 --> 00:59:33,200
Speaker 3: This is from Baystate Banner dot com. It says how

1107
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:37,720
Speaker 3: are reality TV shows affecting society's perception of black women?

1108
00:59:37,840 --> 00:59:37,960
Speaker 2: So?

1109
00:59:38,000 --> 00:59:42,080
Speaker 3: It says, while black women are clearly underrepresented in films

1110
00:59:42,120 --> 00:59:46,640
Speaker 3: and on prime time comedies and dramas, the same cannot

1111
00:59:46,680 --> 00:59:51,040
Speaker 3: be said of our representation on reality reality television. The

1112
00:59:51,080 --> 00:59:55,920
Speaker 3: sheer number of reality programs on television today makes it

1113
00:59:55,960 --> 01:00:02,080
Speaker 3: difficult to determine if we are in some way over presented. However,

1114
01:00:02,360 --> 01:00:08,280
Speaker 3: black women have been entertaining American households through this genre

1115
01:00:09,240 --> 01:00:12,000
Speaker 3: from its inception and continue to do so today. So

1116
01:00:12,440 --> 01:00:18,400
Speaker 3: we've gone from Tammy on the pilot of the real world.

1117
01:00:18,520 --> 01:00:20,800
Speaker 3: Remember Tammy, I don't if y'all know Tammy Roman. That's

1118
01:00:20,840 --> 01:00:24,120
Speaker 3: what she got it, Poppa. She's the original reality TV

1119
01:00:24,240 --> 01:00:28,080
Speaker 3: Queen Okay, and then now on Basketball Wise. It says

1120
01:00:28,120 --> 01:00:31,280
Speaker 3: some of the shows that focus primarily on black women

1121
01:00:31,360 --> 01:00:34,560
Speaker 3: are The Real Housewives of Atlanta, Love and Hip Hop Alanta,

1122
01:00:34,760 --> 01:00:38,360
Speaker 3: The New Atlanta, and Married to Medicine, even Married to Medicine.

1123
01:00:38,480 --> 01:00:41,000
Speaker 3: These are professional black women. What the fuck?

1124
01:00:41,240 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 2: I see the Real four this current season.

1125
01:00:45,480 --> 01:00:49,000
Speaker 3: Why are y'all growing ass ladies fighting forty and fifty

1126
01:00:49,040 --> 01:00:49,720
Speaker 3: year old people?

1127
01:00:50,400 --> 01:00:51,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's insane.

1128
01:00:51,840 --> 01:00:55,240
Speaker 3: The men about to get into it too. I can't

1129
01:00:55,280 --> 01:00:58,240
Speaker 3: do reality TV, Like, I think I'm too much of

1130
01:00:58,240 --> 01:01:00,000
Speaker 3: a real nigga for that. And I and I really

1131
01:01:00,200 --> 01:01:01,680
Speaker 3: like they make a juice network.

1132
01:01:02,000 --> 01:01:05,000
Speaker 2: I feel like they set up situations to make people

1133
01:01:05,280 --> 01:01:11,040
Speaker 2: who normally would not be fistfighting take it there can

1134
01:01:11,200 --> 01:01:12,400
Speaker 2: like you got.

1135
01:01:13,760 --> 01:01:17,880
Speaker 3: Uh sprinkling a couple of baby daddies and husbands. It's

1136
01:01:17,960 --> 01:01:20,760
Speaker 3: just real messy the way that black people are depicted.

1137
01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:25,120
Speaker 2: But that baddies is just the worst. It is the worst,

1138
01:01:25,200 --> 01:01:27,880
Speaker 2: And I keep watching it. I keep watching it like

1139
01:01:28,080 --> 01:01:34,040
Speaker 2: on the stair climber, that is my stair climber. Why, though,

1140
01:01:34,800 --> 01:01:37,840
Speaker 2: why it makes you get through the stair clan? Yeah,

1141
01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:40,600
Speaker 2: because I can't believe what I'm seeing what is gonna

1142
01:01:40,600 --> 01:01:43,120
Speaker 2: happen next, I forget. I'll be on the stair climber

1143
01:01:43,360 --> 01:01:47,880
Speaker 2: our watching baddies. So yeah, so I guess I'm part

1144
01:01:47,920 --> 01:01:51,200
Speaker 2: of the problem giving them views.

1145
01:01:51,280 --> 01:01:53,120
Speaker 3: I don't watch that shit, Like I think the most

1146
01:01:53,160 --> 01:01:58,480
Speaker 3: I watched was Real Housewives of Atlanta, the one year

1147
01:01:58,920 --> 01:02:00,880
Speaker 3: that we had a couple of people on the show.

1148
01:02:01,480 --> 01:02:05,120
Speaker 2: Other than that, I haven't watched me. I ain't gonna

1149
01:02:05,160 --> 01:02:08,040
Speaker 2: lie against me anxiety. I can't like watch like if

1150
01:02:08,080 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 2: there's a season, I can't watch like two episodes back

1151
01:02:11,560 --> 01:02:15,680
Speaker 2: to back because it's only so much oh bitch, bitch,

1152
01:02:15,920 --> 01:02:18,960
Speaker 2: fucking bitch that I can take in, you know, an hour,

1153
01:02:19,040 --> 01:02:20,760
Speaker 2: because they really be customing the other out.

1154
01:02:21,120 --> 01:02:25,440
Speaker 3: So is this really how black friendships are?

1155
01:02:25,520 --> 01:02:28,960
Speaker 2: Because that's just not true. That is not true.

1156
01:02:29,000 --> 01:02:33,000
Speaker 3: But that's what the world season. Maybe just maybe the

1157
01:02:33,120 --> 01:02:39,520
Speaker 3: younger generation have internalized these scenes because they actually grew up. Yeah,

1158
01:02:39,560 --> 01:02:41,439
Speaker 3: they grew up in reality TV.

1159
01:02:42,120 --> 01:02:45,080
Speaker 2: Yeah right, so now they think this is how they're

1160
01:02:45,080 --> 01:02:46,560
Speaker 2: supposed to handle their relationships.

1161
01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:48,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, and as the bitch don't want to have to fight,

1162
01:02:48,720 --> 01:02:50,680
Speaker 3: they frame all the damn time. You might you might

1163
01:02:50,720 --> 01:02:52,880
Speaker 3: stay away from having friends friends.

1164
01:02:53,120 --> 01:02:57,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, we got to do better. That is not normal.

1165
01:02:58,160 --> 01:03:01,880
Speaker 2: That is not how you people you love, You communicate,

1166
01:03:02,040 --> 01:03:05,160
Speaker 2: you use your words. If you're that upset, walk away

1167
01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:09,000
Speaker 2: and come back later. You know, you know, because I

1168
01:03:09,040 --> 01:03:11,800
Speaker 2: know almost came to blows with friends before, but it's

1169
01:03:11,840 --> 01:03:14,600
Speaker 2: never went there. You know, it's never gone to like

1170
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:17,800
Speaker 2: actual fist fighting.

1171
01:03:18,760 --> 01:03:21,000
Speaker 3: Now, you don't talk about having to fight a friend before.

1172
01:03:21,120 --> 01:03:24,320
Speaker 2: Now which friend? Which when you was drunk?

1173
01:03:24,920 --> 01:03:27,080
Speaker 3: Y'all he was drunk and then they ate outside of

1174
01:03:27,120 --> 01:03:28,360
Speaker 3: waffle house or some ship.

1175
01:03:28,440 --> 01:03:29,680
Speaker 2: You was eating grits at your hand.

1176
01:03:29,720 --> 01:03:38,800
Speaker 3: Oh, I like you were the drunk aggressor.

1177
01:03:39,480 --> 01:03:42,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was on He and J. Man, that's the

1178
01:03:42,120 --> 01:03:44,320
Speaker 2: only time I drink here Jay in my life.

1179
01:03:46,120 --> 01:03:48,080
Speaker 3: That gotta be some college shit, because bitch, why you

1180
01:03:48,120 --> 01:03:54,320
Speaker 3: haven't got no money to get some good drinks? I

1181
01:03:54,320 --> 01:03:57,440
Speaker 3: don't know, Man, start with therapy, like therapy is always

1182
01:03:57,520 --> 01:03:59,040
Speaker 3: the thing. If you feel like you have a tough

1183
01:03:59,040 --> 01:04:05,600
Speaker 3: time making friends, go talk to somebody else first, right,

1184
01:04:05,640 --> 01:04:08,440
Speaker 3: that can may maybe help you guide you through.

1185
01:04:11,800 --> 01:04:12,120
Speaker 2: I don't know.

1186
01:04:12,200 --> 01:04:14,360
Speaker 3: Do they just walk up on people like I feel

1187
01:04:14,400 --> 01:04:17,720
Speaker 3: like I meet people I have friends like even social media.

1188
01:04:17,800 --> 01:04:20,080
Speaker 3: I think that maybe if the younger generation, they might

1189
01:04:20,120 --> 01:04:23,000
Speaker 3: have more online friends and they have like real friends

1190
01:04:23,040 --> 01:04:27,880
Speaker 3: in real life. So but even Yahoo, I have a

1191
01:04:27,920 --> 01:04:30,600
Speaker 3: whole group of friends from Yahoo that I'm still friends

1192
01:04:30,640 --> 01:04:31,600
Speaker 3: with today.

1193
01:04:32,720 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 2: There's a woman Lexi Nicole. Shout out to Lexi Nicole.

1194
01:04:36,560 --> 01:04:38,680
Speaker 2: She listens to the show, and we became friends on

1195
01:04:38,720 --> 01:04:42,080
Speaker 2: Instagram and we're going to get cocktails on Friday. And

1196
01:04:42,240 --> 01:04:43,800
Speaker 2: that's really how it happened, you know.

1197
01:04:44,800 --> 01:04:47,720
Speaker 3: So yeah, my friends, if you want to you have

1198
01:04:47,800 --> 01:04:51,400
Speaker 3: to put it, put forth a real effort if you

1199
01:04:51,480 --> 01:04:55,680
Speaker 3: actually want some friends, right, because I feel like they're

1200
01:04:55,720 --> 01:04:57,800
Speaker 3: you're gonna find. I think there's only like maybe like

1201
01:04:57,840 --> 01:05:00,640
Speaker 3: five different characteristics of people out here world for real,

1202
01:05:01,400 --> 01:05:04,600
Speaker 3: and you can pick one right and find that you

1203
01:05:04,640 --> 01:05:10,200
Speaker 3: can find that characteristic of those characteristics in one hundred people. Right,

1204
01:05:10,280 --> 01:05:12,360
Speaker 3: So it starts with you. It starts with them. They

1205
01:05:12,360 --> 01:05:14,680
Speaker 3: ain't gonna do with nobody outside of you in because

1206
01:05:15,000 --> 01:05:18,240
Speaker 3: all black women caddy and black women be backstabbing and

1207
01:05:18,280 --> 01:05:20,800
Speaker 3: all these things that we might have been taught from

1208
01:05:20,920 --> 01:05:24,640
Speaker 3: the older generation that you can't trust each other. Mm hm,

1209
01:05:24,680 --> 01:05:27,880
Speaker 3: you know, cause I feel like, do these pitches, these

1210
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:31,560
Speaker 3: old pitches, do these baby boomers they don't got no

1211
01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:33,480
Speaker 3: friends neither per that survey.

1212
01:05:34,600 --> 01:05:38,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wonder why. I know, Like one of my

1213
01:05:38,600 --> 01:05:42,600
Speaker 2: friends and her mom don't have no friends. My mom doesn't.

1214
01:05:43,120 --> 01:05:45,560
Speaker 2: My mom got too many damn friends. There's always people

1215
01:05:45,600 --> 01:05:48,240
Speaker 2: at her damn house. And she's happy.

1216
01:05:48,480 --> 01:05:50,400
Speaker 3: Your mom seems like a happy person.

1217
01:05:50,880 --> 01:05:52,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, she is happy, you see.

1218
01:05:52,960 --> 01:05:55,360
Speaker 3: So it plays a role within your mental health when

1219
01:05:55,360 --> 01:05:58,800
Speaker 3: you have the outlet of friends you can go to

1220
01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:01,200
Speaker 3: and talk to an incomegate and go out.

1221
01:06:01,080 --> 01:06:05,040
Speaker 2: And they go out to eat a different restaurant every Friday.

1222
01:06:05,120 --> 01:06:08,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's fun and that's something to look forward to. Yeah,

1223
01:06:09,240 --> 01:06:11,280
Speaker 3: aside from just sitting up and sitting up in the

1224
01:06:11,320 --> 01:06:13,520
Speaker 3: house and being a fucking racoust.

1225
01:06:13,320 --> 01:06:18,720
Speaker 2: Like, get out of there, my mama, y'all. My mom

1226
01:06:18,760 --> 01:06:22,600
Speaker 2: does not have a Washington dryer still because on Sunday

1227
01:06:22,680 --> 01:06:25,560
Speaker 2: morning her and her friends go to a laundromat and

1228
01:06:25,720 --> 01:06:27,840
Speaker 2: wash their clothes and that's part of their girls time.

1229
01:06:30,160 --> 01:06:31,600
Speaker 2: I mean, look, it works.

1230
01:06:33,400 --> 01:06:36,760
Speaker 3: It'll take you about about two hours, two three hours

1231
01:06:36,760 --> 01:06:38,640
Speaker 3: to wash clothes with coffee.

1232
01:06:38,760 --> 01:06:43,600
Speaker 2: We get our coffee and wen'kay, you're whatever make you have.

1233
01:06:43,760 --> 01:06:45,360
Speaker 3: They waste their money, though, I'm gonna tell you that

1234
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:50,320
Speaker 3: maybe not because if you're calculating the water bill when

1235
01:06:50,400 --> 01:06:52,920
Speaker 3: you wash clothes. I bet y'all water bell probably so

1236
01:06:53,040 --> 01:06:54,720
Speaker 3: the same. I bet you her water bill is so

1237
01:06:54,800 --> 01:06:57,520
Speaker 3: the same. If she had a washing drying, it might

1238
01:06:57,560 --> 01:07:01,320
Speaker 3: not be saving the money and the money used Washington dollars.

1239
01:07:01,680 --> 01:07:07,520
Speaker 3: Do you one probably gonna listen to this episode switch

1240
01:07:07,600 --> 01:07:10,440
Speaker 3: up like I might bitch the next time I'm in

1241
01:07:11,040 --> 01:07:14,919
Speaker 3: home people they be having those floor display sales man,

1242
01:07:14,920 --> 01:07:16,960
Speaker 3: you can get you a little sat for five hundred.

1243
01:07:18,880 --> 01:07:21,400
Speaker 3: I might call you, ass bitch, I got two fifty,

1244
01:07:21,440 --> 01:07:25,080
Speaker 3: or your mama wash your sheet the dryer, playing with Sarah.

1245
01:07:25,360 --> 01:07:30,560
Speaker 2: Hey girl, get y'all some motherfucker friends.

1246
01:07:30,560 --> 01:07:34,240
Speaker 3: That's my last office. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, bitch before

1247
01:07:34,280 --> 01:07:35,960
Speaker 3: we get up out of here. Okay, all right, all right,

1248
01:07:36,920 --> 01:07:39,000
Speaker 3: So y'all, I want to go back. This is another

1249
01:07:39,440 --> 01:07:41,480
Speaker 3: segment that we had. I might have only done it

1250
01:07:41,520 --> 01:07:44,760
Speaker 3: one time. Remember it was eminem messy meme. I want

1251
01:07:44,760 --> 01:07:46,760
Speaker 3: to get back to doing that. So because I'd be

1252
01:07:46,840 --> 01:07:51,640
Speaker 3: seeing a whole bunch of funny ship that I'd be

1253
01:07:51,680 --> 01:07:53,720
Speaker 3: wanting to share. Y'all probably not seen it. Maybe No,

1254
01:07:53,760 --> 01:07:55,439
Speaker 3: I feel like i I've seen the whole internet. People

1255
01:07:55,440 --> 01:07:57,280
Speaker 3: be sending me ship and I'm like girl, I've seen that.

1256
01:07:58,080 --> 01:08:00,600
Speaker 3: So y'all listen to this right quick. So yes, I

1257
01:08:00,640 --> 01:08:01,760
Speaker 3: am reading again.

1258
01:08:04,360 --> 01:08:05,120
Speaker 2: Story time.

1259
01:08:05,400 --> 01:08:09,640
Speaker 3: It says, it says he doesn't know we're married. That's

1260
01:08:09,640 --> 01:08:10,600
Speaker 3: how the story begins.

1261
01:08:10,640 --> 01:08:11,000
Speaker 2: It says.

1262
01:08:11,040 --> 01:08:14,960
Speaker 3: So we dated for about two years, and I decided

1263
01:08:15,000 --> 01:08:18,400
Speaker 3: I was ready to get married and settle down. She

1264
01:08:19,000 --> 01:08:24,200
Speaker 3: singularly decided. Okay, about three years ago, he told me

1265
01:08:24,280 --> 01:08:26,559
Speaker 3: that he was saving up for a ring and that

1266
01:08:26,680 --> 01:08:29,559
Speaker 3: he wanted to surprise me with the proposal of my

1267
01:08:29,680 --> 01:08:33,360
Speaker 3: dreams lo and Behold. A few months passed and still

1268
01:08:33,479 --> 01:08:37,680
Speaker 3: no proposal. I asked him when he planned on doing it,

1269
01:08:38,080 --> 01:08:41,800
Speaker 3: and he told me he had simply changed his mind.

1270
01:08:43,960 --> 01:08:47,200
Speaker 3: Simply changed his mind. Why would he buy the cow

1271
01:08:47,439 --> 01:08:50,240
Speaker 3: when he is already getting the milk for free?

1272
01:08:50,280 --> 01:08:50,759
Speaker 2: She says.

1273
01:08:51,840 --> 01:08:56,080
Speaker 3: I felt like he scammed me. I was done letting

1274
01:08:56,160 --> 01:09:00,639
Speaker 3: men scam me. Fed up, so I just to take

1275
01:09:00,720 --> 01:09:02,360
Speaker 3: matters into my own hands.

1276
01:09:02,439 --> 01:09:03,479
Speaker 2: I found a man.

1277
01:09:03,720 --> 01:09:07,479
Speaker 3: Y'all, listen, listen, it is very close. I found a

1278
01:09:07,560 --> 01:09:11,680
Speaker 3: man on the internet who looked just like him, and

1279
01:09:11,800 --> 01:09:15,040
Speaker 3: while he was sleeping, I went ahead and took his

1280
01:09:15,240 --> 01:09:19,639
Speaker 3: ID along with his birth certificate. Okay, she took her

1281
01:09:19,840 --> 01:09:24,439
Speaker 3: boyfriend's ID and birth certificate, and she found a man

1282
01:09:24,520 --> 01:09:27,759
Speaker 3: online that looks like him. Clarified, I feey' all okay.

1283
01:09:29,280 --> 01:09:34,120
Speaker 3: She then offered this lookalike, who was pretty much homeless,

1284
01:09:34,439 --> 01:09:37,160
Speaker 3: one thousand dollars to come to the courthouse with her,

1285
01:09:38,560 --> 01:09:41,840
Speaker 3: and we did the thing, she says, with praying hands

1286
01:09:41,840 --> 01:09:46,400
Speaker 3: in the praising hands okay, cartwheels and smiley faces emojis.

1287
01:09:47,200 --> 01:09:52,599
Speaker 3: We've been married now for almost two years, and I've

1288
01:09:52,800 --> 01:09:56,080
Speaker 3: never been happier. I am moving and behaving like a

1289
01:09:56,120 --> 01:10:00,920
Speaker 3: wife in every since. I've been cooking every day, washing laundry,

1290
01:10:01,000 --> 01:10:06,280
Speaker 3: and taking great care of my husband. He has complimented

1291
01:10:06,320 --> 01:10:09,240
Speaker 3: me many times on how amazing I am and how

1292
01:10:09,280 --> 01:10:12,720
Speaker 3: well I perform my duties as his lady. On Valentine's

1293
01:10:12,760 --> 01:10:15,519
Speaker 3: Day this year, he even decorated our room and he

1294
01:10:15,600 --> 01:10:19,080
Speaker 3: had the word wife written with flowers.

1295
01:10:19,439 --> 01:10:20,920
Speaker 2: I thought, how ironic.

1296
01:10:22,080 --> 01:10:25,880
Speaker 3: Little does y'all know exactly little does he know? I'm

1297
01:10:25,920 --> 01:10:26,439
Speaker 3: his wife?

1298
01:10:27,360 --> 01:10:27,840
Speaker 2: She said.

1299
01:10:28,000 --> 01:10:31,920
Speaker 3: My question is how do I tell him we are official? Now?

1300
01:10:32,360 --> 01:10:35,719
Speaker 2: This is two years later. Now, shouldn't I just hope.

1301
01:10:35,479 --> 01:10:37,960
Speaker 3: That he changes his mind and eventually proposes on his

1302
01:10:38,000 --> 01:10:40,879
Speaker 3: own once he sees how amazing I am.

1303
01:10:41,240 --> 01:10:43,200
Speaker 2: We are past the one.

1304
01:10:43,120 --> 01:10:45,599
Speaker 3: Year mark, so I no longer have to worry about

1305
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:48,679
Speaker 3: in an omen, which is great. We went on vacation

1306
01:10:48,800 --> 01:10:52,160
Speaker 3: about a week after our ceremony. She still talk about

1307
01:10:52,200 --> 01:10:55,160
Speaker 3: her boyfriend. Ceremony was with some nigga off the internet

1308
01:10:55,240 --> 01:10:58,760
Speaker 3: she met that looked like her boyfriend, and for me,

1309
01:10:59,040 --> 01:11:04,000
Speaker 3: it was our honey. We've never been happier. I just

1310
01:11:04,160 --> 01:11:09,400
Speaker 3: really need him to I just really need him on

1311
01:11:09,479 --> 01:11:12,320
Speaker 3: board with all of this. He noticed I was wearing

1312
01:11:12,320 --> 01:11:15,000
Speaker 3: a ring on my ring finger and I told him

1313
01:11:15,120 --> 01:11:18,719
Speaker 3: it was to keep other men away. He jokingly mentioned

1314
01:11:18,720 --> 01:11:21,439
Speaker 3: how good it looks. I'm tired of keeping our marriage

1315
01:11:21,439 --> 01:11:23,960
Speaker 3: a secret, and I feel like he has a right

1316
01:11:24,040 --> 01:11:26,240
Speaker 3: to know. Any advice appreciated.

1317
01:11:26,439 --> 01:11:30,679
Speaker 2: You're so dumb, you are really dune for she looks crazy.

1318
01:11:31,640 --> 01:11:35,760
Speaker 2: That is insane. This is all right, We're supposed to

1319
01:11:35,800 --> 01:11:38,840
Speaker 2: sit in dumb shores. But some of this is just insanity,

1320
01:11:39,640 --> 01:11:45,000
Speaker 2: because how how you marry somebody without telling them, like

1321
01:11:45,000 --> 01:11:47,080
Speaker 2: why you want to be a wife that bad.

1322
01:11:49,160 --> 01:11:49,479
Speaker 3: Girl?

1323
01:11:49,680 --> 01:11:57,280
Speaker 2: You want to jail, that you committed fraud? Yes, ain't

1324
01:11:57,280 --> 01:11:59,639
Speaker 2: you telling people the internet?

1325
01:12:01,000 --> 01:12:03,320
Speaker 3: And you're putting pictures that with your ring and the

1326
01:12:03,360 --> 01:12:11,439
Speaker 3: flowers made out a wife made into wife.

1327
01:12:09,240 --> 01:12:10,120
Speaker 2: Cannot be real.

1328
01:12:11,000 --> 01:12:13,880
Speaker 3: I don't know, man, but yeah, but you're going to

1329
01:12:14,040 --> 01:12:17,719
Speaker 3: jail whenever the man you need to go. You married

1330
01:12:17,760 --> 01:12:20,160
Speaker 3: him two years ago that he doesn't know you married him.

1331
01:12:20,200 --> 01:12:22,040
Speaker 3: You got his social and all that shit as people

1332
01:12:22,080 --> 01:12:26,200
Speaker 3: worked down there at the courthouse, right, but he still

1333
01:12:26,200 --> 01:12:28,960
Speaker 3: hasn't proposed to you still two years later. Y'all been

1334
01:12:29,000 --> 01:12:32,480
Speaker 3: together for three It's now two years after the fake marriage,

1335
01:12:32,840 --> 01:12:36,320
Speaker 3: and he still has not proposed you after five years.

1336
01:12:36,400 --> 01:12:40,080
Speaker 2: Girl, he don't want to marry you.

1337
01:12:40,960 --> 01:12:42,800
Speaker 3: Because you fucking crazy.

1338
01:12:42,960 --> 01:12:53,559
Speaker 2: Bit that probably he probably making a good decision, because girl,

1339
01:12:53,560 --> 01:12:56,720
Speaker 2: I flabbergasted at this story.

1340
01:12:57,040 --> 01:12:59,680
Speaker 3: Girl, he is there because of obligation. He wrot all

1341
01:12:59,720 --> 01:13:02,080
Speaker 3: fuck with you like that, and he know you nuts.

1342
01:13:02,280 --> 01:13:03,759
Speaker 3: That's why he changes mind.

1343
01:13:06,960 --> 01:13:09,800
Speaker 2: And you just man, if you want to do it

1344
01:13:09,920 --> 01:13:14,200
Speaker 2: or not, it's done, it's done.

1345
01:13:15,360 --> 01:13:17,400
Speaker 3: I want to see that the girl who you want

1346
01:13:17,439 --> 01:13:19,760
Speaker 3: to marry that bad you want to fake a marriage?

1347
01:13:19,960 --> 01:13:24,960
Speaker 2: Who? I mean impressed with the dedication? Though you gotta

1348
01:13:25,040 --> 01:13:30,120
Speaker 2: really be dedicated to this man to marry him without

1349
01:13:30,200 --> 01:13:36,559
Speaker 2: him or crazy? It's two things can be true. It

1350
01:13:36,560 --> 01:13:38,040
Speaker 2: once I feel.

1351
01:13:37,760 --> 01:13:40,920
Speaker 3: Like she will kill him. I feel like if he leaves,

1352
01:13:41,120 --> 01:13:44,080
Speaker 3: she'll do something to him because you wanted that man

1353
01:13:44,200 --> 01:13:44,679
Speaker 3: that bad.

1354
01:13:47,640 --> 01:13:49,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, he might be in danger straight up.

1355
01:13:49,840 --> 01:13:53,639
Speaker 3: Yes, snapped and look at her picture.

1356
01:13:54,680 --> 01:13:58,800
Speaker 2: The man who went and you complicit. Whatever happened to

1357
01:13:58,880 --> 01:14:04,320
Speaker 2: bro code. You need to go to jail too, both

1358
01:14:04,360 --> 01:14:04,759
Speaker 2: of y'all.

1359
01:14:05,240 --> 01:14:11,559
Speaker 3: Thousand dollars, one thousand dollars, that's all she got money to.

1360
01:14:11,560 --> 01:14:14,479
Speaker 2: Waste because he signed, He signed the paperword right, he

1361
01:14:14,560 --> 01:14:17,320
Speaker 2: had to sign at the courthouse. Yeah, you need to

1362
01:14:17,320 --> 01:14:19,759
Speaker 2: go to jail, sir, you need to be arrested.

1363
01:14:20,520 --> 01:14:23,320
Speaker 3: Police who really committed the fraud at that point?

1364
01:14:24,960 --> 01:14:29,600
Speaker 2: Both of them? The fuck went down there and perpetrated

1365
01:14:29,640 --> 01:14:30,120
Speaker 2: the fraud.

1366
01:14:30,560 --> 01:14:33,559
Speaker 3: Real shame, y'all.

1367
01:14:33,600 --> 01:14:36,200
Speaker 2: Don't be crazy. Don't be fucking crazy, y'all.

1368
01:14:36,439 --> 01:14:39,759
Speaker 3: All right, y'all, don't be fool Go make some motherfucker

1369
01:14:39,760 --> 01:14:43,919
Speaker 3: friends in twenty five man, stop, please, don't be delusion.

1370
01:14:43,960 --> 01:14:45,240
Speaker 3: Or ain't nobody hating on you neither?

1371
01:14:45,720 --> 01:14:46,200
Speaker 2: Okay?

1372
01:14:46,800 --> 01:14:48,759
Speaker 3: I think that'd be half the problem with black women.

1373
01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:48,960
Speaker 2: Man.

1374
01:14:49,040 --> 01:14:50,280
Speaker 3: Somebody always hating on your.

1375
01:14:50,160 --> 01:14:53,320
Speaker 2: Mother, girl, You ain't got that. If nobody hate on anyway.

1376
01:14:54,000 --> 01:14:56,120
Speaker 3: If you enjoyed this episode, y'all, tune in every Thursday

1377
01:14:56,160 --> 01:14:59,040
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1378
01:14:59,080 --> 01:15:03,200
Speaker 3: get your best friend. This is your co host aj

1379
01:15:03,439 --> 01:15:09,599
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1380
01:15:09,600 --> 01:15:12,280
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1381
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1382
01:15:13,800 --> 01:15:17,840
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1383
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Speaker 2: Apple Access and you can like, no you don't have

1384
01:15:22,280 --> 01:15:26,960
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1385
01:15:27,080 --> 01:15:29,439
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1386
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1389
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1390
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1391
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1394
01:15:57,200 --> 01:15:58,040
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1395
01:15:58,600 --> 01:16:02,960
Speaker 3: Remember to speak now and never hold joy down, Little Bunches.

1396
01:16:06,479 --> 01:16:11,880
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1397
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