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Speaker 1: Now that's alarming. It's one more thing. I'm strong and getty.

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Speaker 1: One more thing.

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Speaker 2: You know.

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Speaker 3: I know we're about to talk about alarm clocks, but

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Speaker 3: the old it's a Seinfeld joke. The number one mistake

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Speaker 3: you make with the alarm clock is you get the

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Speaker 3: AMPM thing wrong. Right, you're sleeping. You realize you said

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Speaker 3: it the other day. Yeah, you said it for six

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Speaker 3: thirty pm instead of am. Surely AI can get involved

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Speaker 3: in that at some point and say, are you sure

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Speaker 3: you want to get up at six thirty pm tomorrow?

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Speaker 3: You've never gotten up at six thirty pm before, so

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Speaker 3: it seems unlikely that would be you've never slept the

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Speaker 3: entire day. I think you probably mean six thirty am.

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Speaker 3: Surely AI can take care of that in the future.

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Speaker 3: Why can't it now on my iPhone? Why doesn't it

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Speaker 3: now on my iPhone? Say you're taking a nap for

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Speaker 3: fourteen hours?

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Speaker 2: Are you really intending to sleep from three pm to

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Speaker 2: you know, four fifteen tomorrow morning?

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Speaker 4: Really?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's an excellent point. All those Sometimes you'll

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Speaker 2: set an alarm for I will. I will actually if

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Speaker 2: I'm playing golf the next morning and I've had a

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Speaker 2: good practice session at all, and I want to remember

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Speaker 2: one particular thing or technique or something. I'll sometimes schedule

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Speaker 2: it ten minutes before I'm going to get to the

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Speaker 2: golf court golf course, an alarm that says you know whatever,

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Speaker 2: you know, good tempo whatever. So anyway, maybe someday they

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Speaker 2: will have that breakthrough. But as I was bitching about

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Speaker 2: during the show, they can't even get like periods and

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Speaker 2: commas right, or spelling or it's deaf, Siri is deaf,

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Speaker 2: sirih needs a hearing test well.

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Speaker 3: And my complaint always is because I watch it all

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Speaker 3: voice text it, it gets it right the first time,

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Speaker 3: then changes it into chibberish. That's what confuses me the most.

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Speaker 3: You heard it correctly, then changed it to something else.

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Speaker 2: Why you know, another gripe which reminds me of a

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Speaker 2: different thing. But and this is I realized, this is

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Speaker 2: like I'm the only person on earth who is offended

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Speaker 2: by this. But Apple, stop hyphenating so much.

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Speaker 1: It's a thing.

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Speaker 2: You don't want to hyphenate words unless you absolutely have to,

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Speaker 2: especially names. Happen to me today I was texting something

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Speaker 2: hyphenated in the middle of somebody's name. It's I mean

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Speaker 2: and the reason it flabbergasts me is that there's a

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Speaker 2: long tradition of editing in the English language publications, books, magazines, whatever,

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Speaker 2: even websites, and the rules are known. They're right there

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Speaker 2: for the AI systems to learn. But for whatever reason,

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Speaker 2: Apple is obsessed with hyphenating so stop, which also reminds

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Speaker 2: me of this piece I saw where was that in

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Speaker 2: the Wall Street Journal? The global elite have given up

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Speaker 2: on spelling and grammar. The Epstein Pracus where all those

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Speaker 2: communications were unearthed and released and the rest of it,

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Speaker 2: probably improperly, but that's a story for another day. Nobody

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Speaker 2: bothers to capitalize anymore. It's full and these are like

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Speaker 2: the elito Wall Street. I didn't an academia and science.

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Speaker 3: I did notice that that the situation sucks. There's misspellings

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Speaker 3: everywhere incredibly well, they're like the way I do it,

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Speaker 3: just incredibly relaxed.

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Speaker 1: Do you just.

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Speaker 3: Which I'm fine with, but just get the words out?

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Speaker 3: And uh yeah. I was kind of surprised by that.

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Speaker 1: I cannot send a text with a grammatical error.

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Speaker 3: Well what do you call it?

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Speaker 1: If I do?

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Speaker 2: I feel regret like I don't know, I accidentally ran

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Speaker 2: over a cat with my car feel bad?

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Speaker 3: What what? It depends on the grammatical error, like I

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Speaker 3: can't send a wrong version of their Oh, that's.

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Speaker 1: Funny, that's at the top of my list. I can't either.

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Speaker 3: I regue because I have people think I'm stupid. But

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Speaker 3: I don't see any reason that capitalize anything ever again

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Speaker 3: in my life. Oh, I capitalize everything, all the capitalize.

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Speaker 1: Why don't they?

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Speaker 2: Why don't you run around on all fours grunting, huh, gonna.

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Speaker 1: Abandon your humanity, civilization. I think that's a fair criticism.

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Speaker 1: Let's move on.

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Speaker 3: I do periods in my my just law long screed.

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Speaker 3: Oh no, you can figure it out from the context.

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Speaker 3: No punctuation.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I hate we all hate you. Yes, I sent

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Speaker 5: the wrong too. Yesterday I meant t O O and

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Speaker 5: I sent.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, I don't want to do, and.

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Speaker 4: I jumped at the edit button.

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh my.

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Speaker 3: God, it's amazing. Like the AI have bots who I

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Speaker 3: talked to a lot. They can understand my endless stream

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Speaker 3: of words with no punctuation perfectly fine. They know logically

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Speaker 3: where the word you too.

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Speaker 2: They hate me, but apple is actually sad at AI stuff.

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Speaker 1: It's funny.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, Oh, let's see, just get back to the topic

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Speaker 2: at hand, which is the fascinating history of alarm clocks

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Speaker 2: and more. We talked about this on the show the

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Speaker 2: podcast earlier, but we didn't get time to do it

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Speaker 2: right in my opinion, first of all alternative alarm clocks,

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Speaker 2: including the sonic Bomb for the deepest sleepers. It's unbelievably loud.

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Speaker 2: It flashes bright lights. And there's this it looks like

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Speaker 2: a hockey puck. It's a bed vibrator. You tuck I

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Speaker 2: think under your mattress and it's so strong it shakes

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Speaker 2: you awake. So if you're flashing lights, screaming sirens in

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Speaker 2: your bed, being shaken like it's the Blitz in nineteen

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Speaker 2: forty one.

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Speaker 3: Wow, I'm a light sleeper. So any alarm clock could

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Speaker 3: you say, HEYMP, it's time to get it. He'd be

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Speaker 3: perfectly fine on me. I'd wake up, not me, shut up.

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Speaker 2: And then we talked about this on the show. This

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Speaker 2: alarm clock, the Pavlock shock clock, which I believe is

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Speaker 2: a play.

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Speaker 1: On Pavlov's dogs.

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Speaker 2: But anyway, this gal gets shocked with about three hundred

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Speaker 2: volts to her right wrist to get her up in

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Speaker 2: the morning.

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Speaker 1: That's weird.

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Speaker 3: I would wet myself for one thing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: So she wears like this, well, look like a watch

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Speaker 2: band to sleep at night, and she gets electrocuted to

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Speaker 2: wake her up in the morning.

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Speaker 1: She says, yes, like a.

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Speaker 2: It's now it's a six or seven on the pain scale.

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Speaker 2: She said, it's somebody pinching you, not softly.

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Speaker 3: Wow. Okay, So, like, I don't exactly know what three

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Speaker 3: hundred volts feels like, but I wouldn't call anything that's

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Speaker 3: a seven on the pain scale minor.

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Speaker 5: This all sounds like a way to just piss me

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Speaker 5: off immediately at the beginning of dark the day.

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Speaker 3: Angry, Yeah, and wet because I wet myself.

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Speaker 2: Well, and that's She sets hers at seventy five percent

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Speaker 2: of the maximum voltage at three hundred. It sounds terrible

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Speaker 2: her just sets it to twenty five.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Oh, let's see.

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Speaker 2: There's this other stuff that we talked about a little

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Speaker 2: bit where you have to when your alarm goes off,

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Speaker 2: you take your smartphone and you have to scan a

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Speaker 2: barcode like in your bathroom to show your up and

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Speaker 2: moving otherwise otherwise it donates your money to charity.

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Speaker 4: I like that. One.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's kind of funny.

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Speaker 2: Man. I want to sleep in, but I don't want

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Speaker 2: to sleep in twenty five bucks worth.

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Speaker 1: All right, I'll get up.

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Speaker 3: How about if you said it, it will, it will

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Speaker 3: booty call an ex girlfriend if you don't get out

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Speaker 3: of bed.

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Speaker 2: By god, I'm sure that is a really good idea.

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Speaker 2: You can set it for whatever amount of money you want.

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Speaker 2: But there was one user who must have been crazy

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Speaker 2: rich set it for nine hundred and ninety nine dollars

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Speaker 2: and it went off three times.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 3: They have the weird self punishment thing like I have

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Speaker 3: not around our alarm clocks, but other things right, Like,

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Speaker 3: I feel like if I punish myself enough, I want

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Speaker 3: to I don't get it wrong, which doesn't always work. Well,

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Speaker 3: everybody's done the like put the alarm clock across the room,

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Speaker 3: right or something, so you just you have to get

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Speaker 3: out of bed, and once you're out of bed, it's

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Speaker 3: less likely or you're just gonna fall back asleep.

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Speaker 1: Gosh.

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Speaker 5: I miss the days of being able to sleep like that,

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Speaker 5: being at like a heavy sleeper.

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Speaker 4: I am not anymore. I guess I don't know.

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Speaker 5: I wake up at everything I used to be able

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Speaker 5: to sleep through a concert and now it's there's not

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Speaker 5: a chance.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, sleep does change through life. It absolutely does. Another

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Speaker 2: wake up app is Alarmy, which has roughly nine hundred

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Speaker 2: thousand daily users in the US. It gives you missions

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Speaker 2: such as doing squats, shaking the phone, or typing out

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Speaker 2: motivational quotes before it stops sounding to make sure you're awake.

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Speaker 3: Wow, you have to do as problem or something. So

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Speaker 3: I can't just flip it off and go back to sleep.

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Speaker 3: I have to do ten deep knee bends and that's

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Speaker 3: definitely gonna wake me up and up stay awake.

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Speaker 4: How would it know you did ten squats?

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Speaker 3: That's a good question.

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Speaker 1: Maybe it has the sensor, but yeah, I would just

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Speaker 1: check it up and down.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, would you jack it up?

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Speaker 1: You son?

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Speaker 2: And this this gal who says, uh, she's motivated because

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Speaker 2: her husband hates it, and so she's motivated to do

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Speaker 2: it really quick and get up.

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Speaker 1: Let's see, all right, here we go.

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Speaker 3: Tell me the idea when the first alarm clock was

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Speaker 3: like how back, how back? How far back? To alarm

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Speaker 3: clocks go like mechanical ones where you wid you should say.

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Speaker 1: That I was just about to get into and I

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Speaker 1: know how excited Michael Is for this, I really am.

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Speaker 1: This reminds me history of the alarm clock. Did I

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Speaker 1: say fascinated? I'm an idiot.

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Speaker 3: It reminds me. Moving around vacation. We were driving through

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Speaker 3: Idaho and we kept seeing billboards for the Potato Hall

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Speaker 3: of Fame, and I kept telling my kids, Oh, only

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Speaker 3: three hundred more miles. This rank's right up there, the

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Speaker 3: history of alarm clocks and the Potato Hall of Fame.

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Speaker 1: The Potato Hall of Fame.

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Speaker 3: Did you stop?

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Speaker 5: No?

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Speaker 3: I kept telling them we were going to and they

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Speaker 3: had grown missed off.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, you got your You got like your hundred

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Speaker 2: greatest potatoes of all time.

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Speaker 1: They're kids like, that's a r eh boy.

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Speaker 2: Long before apps like alarmy, makers of alarm clocks recognized

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Speaker 2: that some of their products needed a tinge of menace.

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Speaker 2: Demand for alarm clocks took off in the late nineteenth century.

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Speaker 3: Late eighteen I was going to guess earlier than that.

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Speaker 2: Actually, yeah, I think probably Industrial Revolution, because before people

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Speaker 2: would go to bed at dark and wake up at

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Speaker 2: light more or less and do their do their stuff

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Speaker 2: in the daylight.

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Speaker 1: Let's see.

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Speaker 2: Early models were named the rattler, the slumber stopper and

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Speaker 2: the tornado. The west clock siesta was advertised in the

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Speaker 2: nineteen thirties as having a second, more insistent alarm that

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Speaker 2: went off ten minutes.

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Speaker 1: After the first one. Ah good, one good, more or

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Speaker 1: less the invention of the stool's alarm.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, other long ago alarms lit a flame or

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Speaker 2: made a pot of coffee.

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Speaker 4: Oh see, now we're talking.

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Speaker 1: Oh yeah.

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Speaker 2: I tell you what if you could fry up some

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Speaker 2: bacon and make me a pot of coffee. That's the

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Speaker 2: smell of that alone. I would, you know, float out

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Speaker 2: of bed like a cartoon character.

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Speaker 4: Be on?

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Speaker 3: Is there settled science on whether or not the snooze

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Speaker 3: is a good idea? Is sleeping to the maximum time

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Speaker 3: you can get up the best way? Or is cutting

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Speaker 3: ten to fifteen minutes out of your sleep with the

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Speaker 3: snooze alarm the best way? I could you can make

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Speaker 3: an argument for both. I've always used the snooze, but

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Speaker 3: it does cheat you out of you know, if you're

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Speaker 3: deep asleep eight ten, twelve whatever you said it for

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Speaker 3: minutes of deep sleep?

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Speaker 1: Yeah yeah.

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Speaker 2: I've heard scientists say, in fact, it's practically universal that no,

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Speaker 2: you're better off not using the snoozele.

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Speaker 1: It makes sense, sleep and then wake up.

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Speaker 3: I just can't get up on that first hand the film.

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Speaker 3: I can't the first noise. Now I got to jump

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Speaker 3: up out of bed. I can't do it.

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Speaker 2: It's not a question of sleep, it's a question of

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Speaker 2: like emotionally to me, I've got to ease into the

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Speaker 2: idea of getting out of my nice warm bed and

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Speaker 2: taking on the day.

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Speaker 1: I gotta get psyched up for nine minutes or so.

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Speaker 3: I can't face another day.

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Speaker 1: Today.

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Speaker 2: There are alarms that wow, oh, cry for help, cry

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Speaker 2: for lark. Today there are alarms that turn off when

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Speaker 2: the would be snoozers shoot a fake gun at a target,

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Speaker 2: or curl a.

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Speaker 1: Small dumb bell.

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Speaker 2: Oh boy Clockey, a wheel device that made his debut

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Speaker 2: about twenty years ago, hops off a bedside table in

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Speaker 2: beeps as it zooms around the room.

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Speaker 1: You have to catch it.

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Speaker 5: You did, did, yes, and it was the it was awful.

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Speaker 4: Well, dude, you'd guy like you go try to pick it.

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Speaker 5: Up and then cause it's it's a box and it's

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Speaker 5: got two big wheels, so it can just change directions.

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Speaker 4: How like groggy, it goes in between your legs. I'll

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Speaker 4: the amount of times. I want to chuck that thing.

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Speaker 3: Once I got it idea.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so I opened talking about the what was it

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Speaker 2: called the alarm bomb or whatever? That was crazy loud

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Speaker 2: one oh, the sonic bomb one hundred and thirteen decibels

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Speaker 2: crack yeah to supplement the noise, and has flashing red lights,

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Speaker 2: bed shaking puck for under the mattress or pillow. Even

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Speaker 2: though it was originally made for the deaf and heart

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Speaker 2: of hearing, it's really it has a huge following among college.

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Speaker 1: Kids, said the marketing director. One you.

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Speaker 2: The review reads, I have a heart attack every morning,

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Speaker 2: but it really wakes me up. Sleep doctors say that

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Speaker 2: some amount of what they call sleep inertia is normal.

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Speaker 2: Bah bah bah. So yeah, it's sleep inertia. It speaks

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Speaker 2: for itself. Let's see it ends with Kinsey Small, a

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Speaker 2: thirty one year old software engineer in Boston, has been

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Speaker 2: using Alarmy for years. First thing she does in the

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Speaker 2: morning is give her phone thirty vigorous shakes. Yeah, me too,

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Speaker 2: smacking it with one hand into the palm of the other.

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Speaker 2: The shaking somehow gets me to that point where I'm awake.

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Speaker 2: I know that I'm up, and I have to go

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Speaker 2: to work. I really do think this is the reason

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Speaker 2: I still have a job. Yeah, some sort of physical

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Speaker 2: activity like that would do it.

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Speaker 3: There was a sleep highgiene article in the New York

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Speaker 3: Times a couple of weeks ago, like this is everything

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Speaker 3: we now know about sleep, And one of the number

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Speaker 3: one things they said for good sleep is to go

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Speaker 3: to bed and get up at the same time every day. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: and I've never done that. I don't do it on

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Speaker 3: a Monday through Friday basis, let alone on the weekends.

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Speaker 3: But they said that is the best thing you can

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Speaker 3: do for your sleep, is to train your body same

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Speaker 3: time every day. My dad's always done that. He's the

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Speaker 3: opposite of me. He's always gone to bed like nine thirty.

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Speaker 3: He's asleep, and he gets up at four thirty or whatever.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I'm practically religious about it all right.

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Speaker 2: Through the years, I've noticed that if you're like crazy

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Speaker 2: short out in sleep, it doesn't affect you much.

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Speaker 1: Me.

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Speaker 2: I'm psychotic, so I don't like the feeling of being

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Speaker 2: sleep deprived. It's so miserable. That's part of the reason

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Speaker 2: life I ever. I get to ten fifteen, I'm like, no,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to bed.

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Speaker 3: Good en If I've ever not been sleep deprived, so

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Speaker 3: I don't know what that would feel like.

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Speaker 4: Now it's a blast.

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Speaker 3: I push myself really hard on that, which will kill

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Speaker 3: me early, no doubt about it. Probably the most unhealthy

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Speaker 3: thing I do.

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Speaker 2: Jack, there's no alarm clock in the grave, he says,

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Speaker 2: trying to somehow tie that dark thing together with the theme, how.

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Speaker 1: Do I do?

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Speaker 4: Nailed it?

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Speaker 1: How's this for an idea for an alarm clock?

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Speaker 2: You hire somebody with an ice bucket and at three

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Speaker 2: am they just dumped that water crap.

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Speaker 3: I probably would have a heart attack on that.

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Speaker 4: I would haul off and punch that person.

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Speaker 2: Yes, oh yeah, I would beat them hard, bulkhep assault charge,

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Speaker 2: no holds barred.

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Speaker 1: Yes, but you'd be awake. Yes, you know what You're right, Michael, Well.

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Speaker 4: I guess that's it.

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Speaker 3: You're losing an eye, but I'm awake.