WEBVTT - “I WANT TO DO NOTHING” 0:00:00.080 --> 0:00:01.520 All from Maddie. 0:00:01.720 --> 0:00:03.880 Hello, can you hear me? Yeah? 0:00:03.920 --> 0:00:10.080 Hey, what's your name, Maddie, Maddie, what's up, Maddie? What's up? 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:12.520 What's going on with you? You know? 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:17.040 Nothing much? I uh, I'm just eating some pizza right now. 0:00:18.040 --> 0:00:23.680 That sounds psychedelic. That sounds psychedelic eating pizza. You know. 0:00:24.480 --> 0:00:26.200 I'm sad. 0:00:26.200 --> 0:00:29.880 I just I just can't. This is just crazy, but continue. Sorry. 0:00:31.200 --> 0:00:33.760 I was just gonna say, it's really about the simple 0:00:33.840 --> 0:00:39.440 things in life. Is eating pizza is so great? I 0:00:39.479 --> 0:00:43.159 talk a lot on here about like my own like 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:47.400 food bullshit, and I've been thinking about this. Tell me, 0:00:47.479 --> 0:00:53.360 tell me what you think, Maddie is I can't decide 0:00:53.520 --> 0:00:59.040 if I'm happier when I'm not eating like shit or 0:01:00.160 --> 0:01:04.640 when I'm eating like shit, because something like there's just 0:01:04.680 --> 0:01:08.720 an acute happiness that I feel when I eat a 0:01:08.920 --> 0:01:14.679 giant cheese steak and fries and watch YouTube, and it's 0:01:14.840 --> 0:01:20.560 I don't there is like one could say a greater 0:01:20.760 --> 0:01:26.080 amount of contentment in living a healthy lifestyle, but I 0:01:26.080 --> 0:01:29.040 don't know. There's it's probably a balance. There's probably a 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:32.280 way to balance it, because once you eat like shit 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:35.640 for too long, the effects diminished but god, I did 0:01:35.720 --> 0:01:44.080 nothing fucking matches it. I like, like sex or drugs 0:01:44.200 --> 0:01:49.200 or what like. I've had no dopamine high quite like 0:01:50.240 --> 0:01:56.600 eating an entire pint of peanut butter s'mores, Ben and Jerry's. 0:01:56.640 --> 0:02:03.720 I really and and to deprive myself of that feels 0:02:04.400 --> 0:02:07.720 like it makes life less worth living. But also to 0:02:07.920 --> 0:02:11.720 indulge too heavily to the point where it's not even 0:02:11.800 --> 0:02:14.720 enjoyable anymore. It's also so I don't know. There's all 0:02:14.760 --> 0:02:19.960 I find a great joy and exercise, Like I like 0:02:20.440 --> 0:02:24.080 lifting weights, I love walking, I love exercising, but I 0:02:24.080 --> 0:02:29.040 don't like eating a salad gives me no joy. I 0:02:29.120 --> 0:02:29.400 don't know. 0:02:29.440 --> 0:02:30.200 What do you? 0:02:30.360 --> 0:02:31.359 What do you think, Maddie? 0:02:32.240 --> 0:02:36.640 Okay, I've like been having this similar issue because I'm 0:02:36.680 --> 0:02:40.120 like a good eater, you know, and I don't know 0:02:40.200 --> 0:02:42.400 I've been I've been trying to like be more healthy, 0:02:42.440 --> 0:02:46.040 but like I will literally like do the mill prep thing. 0:02:46.360 --> 0:02:50.680 It takes fucking forever, and then I could sit there 0:02:50.720 --> 0:02:52.600 and like eat it all I feel like, and it's 0:02:52.600 --> 0:02:54.880 because it's healthy, and then I'm like not even full, 0:02:54.960 --> 0:02:58.280 I feel like, but also part of it is definitely 0:02:58.360 --> 0:03:03.000 just sugar, and it's like another I don't know, it's 0:03:03.040 --> 0:03:07.040 another money spending thing in this capitalistic world. You know, 0:03:07.919 --> 0:03:11.280 not to sound like that, but sugar is addicting as fuck, 0:03:11.840 --> 0:03:17.000 and fast food just the ease that it provides, I guess, 0:03:17.440 --> 0:03:20.160 but I don't know. I've been struggling. I'm like sitting 0:03:20.160 --> 0:03:23.160 at I'm sitting here looking at this pizza and I've 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:26.079 eaten one piece and I could easily eat the whole 0:03:26.080 --> 0:03:29.640 thing probably, but I'm not gonna do it because it's summertime. 0:03:29.880 --> 0:03:32.800 I need I need that summer body, so I'm just 0:03:32.840 --> 0:03:33.560 gonna look at it. 0:03:34.040 --> 0:03:35.840 What are your plans for the summertime? Do you have 0:03:35.880 --> 0:03:37.120 anything exciting happening? 0:03:38.200 --> 0:03:42.440 You know? I, well, I'm broke, so I'm gonna do 0:03:42.480 --> 0:03:45.280 the best I can. But I'm actually I'm going to 0:03:45.440 --> 0:03:50.280 LA next week, so I think that'll be fine. I 0:03:50.320 --> 0:03:52.720 got a friend to pay for my plane ticket, which 0:03:52.800 --> 0:03:56.920 was pretty baller, so yeah, I'm just gonna hang out 0:03:56.920 --> 0:04:01.720 there for a few days. I'm moving this summer, so 0:04:01.800 --> 0:04:04.920 that should be fun too. But yeah, kind of on 0:04:04.960 --> 0:04:08.520 a budget, so not much besides just working and saving money. 0:04:08.560 --> 0:04:11.760 Honestly, Uh, your friend did your friend pay for your 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:13.920 plane ticket out of the kindness of their heart or 0:04:14.000 --> 0:04:15.560 was there were there strings attached? 0:04:17.520 --> 0:04:20.080 Well, there's no strings attached. Her mom is a flight 0:04:20.440 --> 0:04:22.200 or she used to be a flight attendant, so they 0:04:22.200 --> 0:04:25.880 get some weird like ticket perks now, which I'm super 0:04:26.040 --> 0:04:29.240 jealous of. But I guess I'm in on it now. 0:04:29.440 --> 0:04:34.800 So hmm, well, Mattie, let me ask you this, is 0:04:34.800 --> 0:04:36.800 there anything in particular that you called in to want 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:37.400 to talk about? 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:42.240 You know, not really, I didn't really think you'd answer, 0:04:42.240 --> 0:04:45.480 to be honest with you. Last stream I was calling 0:04:45.560 --> 0:04:49.599 as well because I was on a little road trip 0:04:49.680 --> 0:04:55.080 driving back home, and you always talk about how do 0:04:55.200 --> 0:04:58.200 like you romanticize things in your life, and I was 0:04:58.240 --> 0:05:02.760 like definitely having that moment home, like listening to sad music, 0:05:02.839 --> 0:05:05.359 and then I saw you like get on the stream 0:05:05.440 --> 0:05:07.360 or whatever, so I was like, damn, like I need 0:05:07.400 --> 0:05:10.600 to talk to him about this. But you know, now 0:05:10.640 --> 0:05:13.880 I'm already I'm already back in my current home, so 0:05:15.400 --> 0:05:17.480 that romantic feeling is gone. But I know. 0:05:19.279 --> 0:05:25.120 It's an interesting thing, romanticizing your life. I think about it. 0:05:25.240 --> 0:05:27.320 I've been thinking about it recently because there's parts of 0:05:27.360 --> 0:05:31.720 my life that I romanticize, like when I'm traveling or 0:05:32.000 --> 0:05:40.120 doing grand things, or talking with my parents or or 0:05:40.160 --> 0:05:43.719 with friends, or there's parts of my life that I 0:05:43.760 --> 0:05:47.920 certainly romanticize, and some of them are like inherently romantic, 0:05:48.000 --> 0:05:54.680 like traveling and whatnot. But I think the idea of 0:05:54.760 --> 0:06:01.320 living a holy romantic life or every second of it 0:06:01.360 --> 0:06:07.440 is romantic, that there's something exhausting to that, you know 0:06:07.520 --> 0:06:09.960 what I mean? Like I like like almost like oh 0:06:10.400 --> 0:06:12.640 it never, you gotta you gotta give yourself some time 0:06:12.680 --> 0:06:16.040 to breathe, you gotta get cause that's that's why eating 0:06:16.120 --> 0:06:19.800 the cheese steak in front of my TV watch like 0:06:19.880 --> 0:06:22.120 eating the cheese steak and fries in front of my TV, 0:06:22.360 --> 0:06:26.240 I want there is nothing romantic about that at all, 0:06:26.640 --> 0:06:32.080 and I wouldn't dare attempt to make it romantic because 0:06:32.160 --> 0:06:38.920 when everything's romantic, it's so grand and lofty and sometimes 0:06:38.960 --> 0:06:42.880 just sometimes you just want to fucking be a normal ass, 0:06:43.440 --> 0:06:49.320 like just live in normal fucking whatever bullshit life, which. 0:06:49.160 --> 0:06:52.159 Is eating And how are you supposed to do that? Though? 0:06:52.240 --> 0:06:54.480 How how do you be normal? Do you know? 0:06:55.120 --> 0:06:57.720 You just eat a sandwich and watch TV. It's the 0:06:57.720 --> 0:07:00.800 most it's the least romantic thing you could do but 0:07:00.920 --> 0:07:03.440 be But I try to be in the moment of it, 0:07:03.480 --> 0:07:06.840 and I go, I am so fuck I actually, I 0:07:07.080 --> 0:07:11.440 actually I actively de romanticize it. I ate it last night. 0:07:11.440 --> 0:07:13.120 I ate a cheese steak and fries, and I thought 0:07:13.160 --> 0:07:18.440 to myself, there is nowhere else on the planet and 0:07:18.480 --> 0:07:22.040 nothing else I would rather be doing at this exact moment. 0:07:22.080 --> 0:07:25.120 I am honored. You know what, I know, what I'm 0:07:25.120 --> 0:07:27.840 thinking about right now is I'm actually I'm talking a 0:07:27.840 --> 0:07:32.200 lot of bullshit. I actually completely romanticized eating a sandwich. 0:07:33.160 --> 0:07:36.560 I literally, yeah, like the most normal, Like it's so 0:07:36.720 --> 0:07:37.440 normal of you. 0:07:37.840 --> 0:07:43.440 I thought myself. I thought to myself, I cause I 0:07:43.680 --> 0:07:47.160 sat down and I'm trying not to feel guilty about 0:07:47.400 --> 0:07:50.440 like whatever. But I mean some some things you are 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:53.880 you should feel guilty about, like you know, being addicted 0:07:53.920 --> 0:07:57.720 to the fucking Instagram all day or whatever. But I 0:07:57.880 --> 0:08:00.720 was eating this cheese steak and watching TV, and I 0:08:01.080 --> 0:08:06.200 literally said to myself, I am honored to sit here 0:08:06.520 --> 0:08:12.360 and eat this and watch a YouTube video about defective 0:08:12.760 --> 0:08:16.440 Sonic plushies or whatever the fuck bullshit I'm watching. This 0:08:16.600 --> 0:08:19.960 is a great I'm I'm so happy to be doing 0:08:20.000 --> 0:08:24.000 this right now, which I think actually is romanticizing it. 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:26.600 So I'm wrong. I do romanticize eating a sandwich. 0:08:28.040 --> 0:08:31.480 Yeah, well, it's hard. It's hard to catch yourself doing 0:08:31.520 --> 0:08:34.000 something normal and then not being like, oh, I'm doing it. 0:08:34.280 --> 0:08:37.319 Look I'm doing it, and then once you notice you're 0:08:37.360 --> 0:08:40.920 doing it, it's not really normal anymore. In my opinion, 0:08:41.000 --> 0:08:45.560 I don't know. Maybe that's the first steps. Because I'm 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:46.359 a human. 0:08:46.520 --> 0:08:48.920 I'm back. I'm always back and forth between like, oh, 0:08:49.000 --> 0:08:56.440 life is this infinitesimal, crazy event that I'm experiencing in 0:08:56.480 --> 0:09:01.040 the middle of two walls of a Blacklivian that are 0:09:01.160 --> 0:09:03.040 all the time before I was born and all the 0:09:03.080 --> 0:09:06.000 time after I die, And I should spend this little 0:09:06.040 --> 0:09:10.760 speck of time in oblivion doing like be trying to 0:09:10.760 --> 0:09:14.960 be amazing and romantic all the time, you know, But 0:09:15.040 --> 0:09:17.400 it's too much to ask. It's too much to ask 0:09:18.280 --> 0:09:18.600 to do it. 0:09:18.760 --> 0:09:22.160 Well, yeah, I do. I have this issue where I like, well, 0:09:22.200 --> 0:09:25.480 I guess it's romanticizing. I set myself up like I'm 0:09:25.520 --> 0:09:28.040 in a movie or something, and that might sound like 0:09:28.720 --> 0:09:30.400 so selfish and like, oh my. 0:09:30.360 --> 0:09:32.400 God, hold on, hold on, hell I can I stop? 0:09:32.440 --> 0:09:35.000 Can I stop? Can I stop you real quick? Because immediately, yes, 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:40.600 I'm curious you immediately went negative with what you're saying. 0:09:40.600 --> 0:09:43.600 You immediately said it was a problem, and you said 0:09:43.600 --> 0:09:46.839 it was selfish. Why do you feel it is either 0:09:46.880 --> 0:09:49.360 of those things inherently? Why did you? 0:09:49.640 --> 0:09:49.760 Well? 0:09:49.840 --> 0:09:54.720 I feel like I think it's just like you, like 0:09:54.920 --> 0:09:57.920 us as individual humans, would like to think the things 0:09:57.960 --> 0:10:00.760 around you are happening because of you or for you, 0:10:00.840 --> 0:10:03.080 but like, obviously it's not. You know, it's just like 0:10:03.559 --> 0:10:07.560 the world and randomness, and I like will inherently be like, 0:10:08.400 --> 0:10:13.000 oh this this was a sign or something or when 0:10:13.040 --> 0:10:15.880 it really was just like something random that happened. I 0:10:15.880 --> 0:10:18.760 can't even think of an example, honestly, but like I 0:10:18.800 --> 0:10:22.640 will sit there and like, I guess it's not even 0:10:22.679 --> 0:10:27.480 like jumping to conclusions, but just kind of you imagine 0:10:27.520 --> 0:10:29.520 things in my mind. I guess I don't know. 0:10:30.120 --> 0:10:34.200 Well, I don't think. I don't think that's inherently bad. 0:10:34.240 --> 0:10:36.360 You're basically what you're doing is you're take like life 0:10:36.480 --> 0:10:39.400 is chaotic and random and has no narrative or order 0:10:39.520 --> 0:10:44.679 to it, but and you are choosing to take this 0:10:46.360 --> 0:10:52.640 chaos and craft a narrative from it. So I mean 0:10:52.640 --> 0:10:55.120 that's what you're doing. You're crafting a narrative and I 0:10:55.120 --> 0:10:59.080 guess if you want to be a nihilist, you could 0:10:59.120 --> 0:11:02.920 say that the narrative you're crafting, yes, is built on 0:11:02.960 --> 0:11:09.200 a foundation of you know, chaos and inherent meaninglessness. But 0:11:09.920 --> 0:11:11.800 I think it's good to craft a narrative. I don't 0:11:11.800 --> 0:11:16.960 think it's selfish. I think it's it's it's something to 0:11:17.040 --> 0:11:24.200 cling to. You know, you're you're you're creating something to 0:11:24.400 --> 0:11:27.920 cling to within the chaos. And I this is gonna 0:11:27.920 --> 0:11:32.640 sound like woo woo, but it's kind of amazing that 0:11:32.720 --> 0:11:36.160 as human beings we have we can do that. You know, 0:11:36.320 --> 0:11:42.120 that's like a weird, like godly gift to create your 0:11:42.160 --> 0:11:45.559 own narrative from this chaos. So I don't think it's selfish. 0:11:45.559 --> 0:11:48.959 I think it's like it's you're like tapping into your 0:11:49.080 --> 0:11:56.600 higher existence when you as your own narrative. I mean, 0:11:56.600 --> 0:11:58.640 as long as you're not as long as you're not like, 0:11:59.640 --> 0:12:02.200 you know, yeah, being if I don't know, I'm trying 0:12:02.200 --> 0:12:04.920 to think of an example, like, as long as you 0:12:04.960 --> 0:12:08.720 don't think every single thing is about you all the 0:12:08.800 --> 0:12:11.240 time and just being like a fucking asshole. 0:12:12.679 --> 0:12:15.000 Yeah, I don't think I'm an asshole at this point, 0:12:15.120 --> 0:12:17.400 but maybe one day I'll become one. 0:12:17.840 --> 0:12:18.120 I think. 0:12:18.160 --> 0:12:20.599 I feel like people get a little bit more assholey 0:12:21.480 --> 0:12:24.000 as they get older. I haven't met many people that 0:12:24.080 --> 0:12:26.760 are like, oh, I was such an asshole back then 0:12:27.080 --> 0:12:29.040 and now I'm better. Like I feel like it was 0:12:29.120 --> 0:12:32.080 like it's the other way around for most people. 0:12:32.840 --> 0:12:35.920 Why do you why do you think people get become 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:37.360 assholes as they get older? 0:12:39.360 --> 0:12:39.560 Oh? 0:12:39.640 --> 0:12:40.480 Man, I don't know. 0:12:40.559 --> 0:12:42.920 I feel like it's just like it's it's more of 0:12:42.960 --> 0:12:45.560 like a've been there, done that sort of situation. It's 0:12:45.720 --> 0:12:49.080 you've been through more, and it's kind of it's easier 0:12:49.200 --> 0:12:51.880 to like jump to conclusions. I feel like it's like 0:12:51.920 --> 0:12:56.800 the same reason why like like my grandparents are I 0:12:56.800 --> 0:13:01.600 don't know, it's like they I guess they're just like 0:13:01.720 --> 0:13:05.440 less accepting of things, whereas I'm like, why would you 0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:07.960 really care about something that doesn't even affect you? 0:13:07.960 --> 0:13:08.200 You know. 0:13:10.679 --> 0:13:13.320 But also I've you know, I've met some people that 0:13:13.400 --> 0:13:18.400 have like really cleaned up and like have been on 0:13:16.480 --> 0:13:24.199 a non asshole journey. I guess, But I don't know. 0:13:24.600 --> 0:13:26.160 I just feel like that's kind of the way it goes. 0:13:27.800 --> 0:13:30.720 It's always and anytime I see I've probably said this 0:13:30.760 --> 0:13:32.720 on the podcast before. But anytime I see like a 0:13:33.520 --> 0:13:36.160 you know, when you see like an like an elderly 0:13:37.559 --> 0:13:42.400 person like yelling at a customer service person and you're 0:13:43.080 --> 0:13:45.280 every time I see that, I'm like, dude, you had 0:13:46.280 --> 0:13:53.160 eighty fucking years to figure this out? How are you 0:13:53.520 --> 0:13:58.720 still at? Like you're at like level zero of consciousness 0:13:58.800 --> 0:14:02.320 right now when you're doing that right you're and how 0:14:02.360 --> 0:14:03.679 did you get How are you at? 0:14:03.760 --> 0:14:03.880 Like? 0:14:04.200 --> 0:14:06.319 How are you eighty fucking years old and you're at 0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:09.800 like level zero still? It's crazy? 0:14:10.240 --> 0:14:13.560 Yeah, I am. I'm a cashier at the moment, and 0:14:14.559 --> 0:14:18.440 I literally sell T shirts and I deal with that 0:14:18.520 --> 0:14:22.280 every single day. Like someone will walk in and dislike 0:14:22.440 --> 0:14:25.560 something about a T shirt and then like stand there 0:14:25.560 --> 0:14:28.800 and argue with me like they're like I'm holding them hostage, 0:14:28.920 --> 0:14:30.720 and like there have been multiple times where I have 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:32.880 to be like you can leave. You know, I'm not 0:14:33.000 --> 0:14:36.560 asking you to buy anything, but uh, I don't know. People, 0:14:37.240 --> 0:14:39.200 it's kind of a power move, I feel like for 0:14:39.280 --> 0:14:43.200 some of those old people, but it's it's also like, 0:14:43.320 --> 0:14:45.320 I mean, it's not even just old people that I 0:14:45.400 --> 0:14:47.560 run into, Like it could be anyone and you never 0:14:47.600 --> 0:14:50.240 know who it's gonna be either, it's kind of crazy. 0:14:50.560 --> 0:14:53.800 I don't understand. Like, I don't know. I've I've had 0:14:53.800 --> 0:14:57.080 a I've worked customer service like pretty much my whole life, 0:14:57.120 --> 0:15:00.160 I feel like, but I've never been like in a 0:15:00.160 --> 0:15:03.440 situation where I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm so excited to 0:15:03.520 --> 0:15:06.080 bitch at this worker right now, Like that's what I'm 0:15:06.120 --> 0:15:07.080 gonna do when I walk in. 0:15:07.600 --> 0:15:08.600 I guess, I don't know. 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:09.920 I don't know where that comes from. 0:15:10.680 --> 0:15:13.680 It probably comes from like they don't I assume that 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:15.680 they don't have a lot, or like that all their 0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:19.680 friends and family are like dead, or like they don't 0:15:19.760 --> 0:15:23.240 have I don't know. I don't know how people end 0:15:23.320 --> 0:15:26.720 up like that. I really don't. I mean, also, we 0:15:26.840 --> 0:15:34.360 grew up differently because we we exist at this weird 0:15:35.720 --> 0:15:40.000 turning point in society. 0:15:40.120 --> 0:15:43.000 Oh man, Yeah, this is definitely a weird time. I 0:15:43.040 --> 0:15:45.400 don't even want to get into that, honestly. Yeah, all 0:15:45.440 --> 0:15:48.640 anyone talks about you know what I mean, And that's 0:15:48.680 --> 0:15:50.880 all I That's all I talk about at work too. 0:15:50.920 --> 0:15:56.120 It's like, oh, the economy, and I'm like, yeah, I 0:15:56.120 --> 0:15:59.000 don't even Yeah, I have like no money saved. That's 0:15:59.040 --> 0:16:00.760 all I have to say. Like, that's all I got 0:16:00.760 --> 0:16:01.360 to add to that. 0:16:01.560 --> 0:16:03.720 I guess I was talking less about the economy more 0:16:03.720 --> 0:16:08.400 about just like technology in general. 0:16:08.960 --> 0:16:13.160 Uh, yes, yeah, I'm. 0:16:12.920 --> 0:16:14.840 Right, You're right, we don't have I mean, if you 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:16.720 had something you wanted to say about that, you can 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:17.080 say it. 0:16:18.520 --> 0:16:22.120 No, I mean honestly, So I guess, like a little 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:26.440 context into my life. I just graduated college with a 0:16:26.560 --> 0:16:29.880 communications degree because I ran out of time to figure 0:16:29.880 --> 0:16:32.040 out what I actually wanted to do and money. So 0:16:32.080 --> 0:16:35.560 I was like, let me just get something out of this, 0:16:35.720 --> 0:16:40.520 you know. And my whole little background was film production, 0:16:41.320 --> 0:16:44.200 but I somehow made it through without ever figuring out 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:48.040 how to use a camera or like all this very 0:16:48.040 --> 0:16:50.320 important stuff. So now I'm like out here in the 0:16:50.360 --> 0:16:53.200 real world being like, yeah, I like film production, and 0:16:53.240 --> 0:16:55.800 then it's like, oh, yeah, I don't use a camera. 0:16:55.880 --> 0:16:57.480 Oh yeah, I don't know how to edit, you know, 0:16:57.720 --> 0:16:59.800 and like this is stuff that I could easily teach 0:16:59.840 --> 0:17:03.240 myself how to do, and for some reason it's like 0:17:04.040 --> 0:17:06.080 I don't. I don't know, I just don't feel like it. 0:17:06.359 --> 0:17:08.240 But I also like don't know what I like. And 0:17:08.280 --> 0:17:09.960 I guess that's kind of where I am right now, 0:17:10.040 --> 0:17:13.960 and especially with technology, like like there's all these things 0:17:13.960 --> 0:17:15.560 that people are like, oh, you need to know how 0:17:15.600 --> 0:17:17.640 to do this and that. Like the amount of times 0:17:17.640 --> 0:17:22.280 someone told me to make a fucking LinkedIn account, I'm like, dude, 0:17:22.920 --> 0:17:25.600 why can't I just like sell apples or something. 0:17:27.560 --> 0:17:32.080 Well a few things to that is uh I I yeah, 0:17:32.080 --> 0:17:33.720 I talk about this a lot. I also went to 0:17:33.760 --> 0:17:38.560 film school, and yeah, they make you watch old movies 0:17:38.600 --> 0:17:40.640 and they don't actually teach you anything. 0:17:41.080 --> 0:17:44.560 No, I wasted my money and my teachers they didn't 0:17:44.560 --> 0:17:46.320 really not to throw them under the bus because I 0:17:46.320 --> 0:17:48.479 had a good time, but like they didn't know how 0:17:48.520 --> 0:17:50.360 to do anything either, because I feel like that's kind 0:17:50.400 --> 0:17:52.720 of like an ever changing industry, you know, And they're 0:17:52.720 --> 0:17:53.560 all like pretty old. 0:17:54.000 --> 0:17:57.520 Yeah, no, yeah, they're they're they the film school. I'm 0:17:57.760 --> 0:18:00.240 just I'm god, I've been on this rent eight thousand times, 0:18:00.280 --> 0:18:05.000 but yeah, the film school track is like the people 0:18:05.040 --> 0:18:09.280 who like teach at film school usually are like they'll 0:18:09.320 --> 0:18:11.960 be like, yeah, I've been working on the same documentary 0:18:12.080 --> 0:18:15.520 for seven years and we're going to try to get 0:18:16.000 --> 0:18:18.560 a grant for and it's just they're just in a 0:18:18.720 --> 0:18:23.240 universe that is not the universe of that media is 0:18:23.280 --> 0:18:29.239 actually consumed in. But anyway, so why why do you 0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:32.880 just want to sell apples? Why can't you sell apples? 0:18:33.320 --> 0:18:35.000 I mean, I guess I could, but like then, I 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:38.119 also have this thing where like I obviously want to 0:18:38.160 --> 0:18:41.479 be like comfortable one day, you know, and like not 0:18:41.720 --> 0:18:44.119 having this. I feel like if you sell apples, you 0:18:44.200 --> 0:18:45.920 just sell You have to sell apples for the rest 0:18:45.920 --> 0:18:47.720 of your life to survive. And I don't want to 0:18:47.760 --> 0:18:54.240 be old selling apples. Interesting, what do you But I 0:18:54.240 --> 0:18:56.000 would like to I would like to be young and 0:18:56.040 --> 0:18:58.640 sell apples like right now, okay. 0:18:58.760 --> 0:19:01.640 Well what do you why not? I guess I don't. 0:19:01.640 --> 0:19:04.080 I don't see why you How old are you now? 0:19:04.119 --> 0:19:05.040 Are you twenty two? 0:19:06.160 --> 0:19:06.920 I'm twenty three? 0:19:07.040 --> 0:19:11.560 Yeah, fucking go sell apples? Why not? 0:19:12.800 --> 0:19:15.560 Yeah? Maybe I will. I guess. It's more of the 0:19:17.560 --> 0:19:21.560 it's kind of this. I was actually talking to my 0:19:21.640 --> 0:19:25.359 coworker about this today, the feeling of like, oh shit, 0:19:25.600 --> 0:19:28.320 like I am gonna be like I'm gonna be like 0:19:28.359 --> 0:19:31.320 a middle aged person one day, like hopefully, you know, 0:19:31.880 --> 0:19:33.960 And that's like a that's that's kind of new to me, 0:19:34.040 --> 0:19:36.879 I guess, because I don't know. I was like really 0:19:36.920 --> 0:19:40.840 fucking around up until like right now, like this year 0:19:40.920 --> 0:19:44.840 pretty much and now like not to get all like 0:19:45.080 --> 0:19:49.119 existential I feel like, but it's just like damn, like 0:19:49.119 --> 0:19:52.960 this shit is real, you know, yeah, and like I 0:19:53.359 --> 0:19:56.720 can't just like I guess I could go home, but 0:19:56.840 --> 0:19:58.720 I that's not that's not the plane at all. 0:19:58.760 --> 0:20:02.800 You know, Yes, I know what you mean. I remember. 0:20:04.080 --> 0:20:10.000 I think it was twenty nineteen. I had my Yeah, 0:20:10.000 --> 0:20:15.960 when I was in twenty nineteen, I had my existential 0:20:15.960 --> 0:20:18.920 crisis of like, oh shit, this is real and I'm 0:20:18.960 --> 0:20:22.280 going to have to make money and have like a job, 0:20:22.400 --> 0:20:26.280 like have a job and figure out life. I think 0:20:26.320 --> 0:20:29.400 I was twenty twenty one, and you know, up until then, 0:20:29.440 --> 0:20:32.760 it's like I had just been I was in high 0:20:32.800 --> 0:20:35.280 school and I was making movies and doing stand up 0:20:35.280 --> 0:20:37.480 and then I went to film school, which, as you know, 0:20:37.720 --> 0:20:42.320 is nothing. And then I had a like I know, 0:20:42.400 --> 0:20:44.600 I was like you and I was like, oh, I've 0:20:44.640 --> 0:20:47.399 just been like fucking around and kind of getting to 0:20:47.400 --> 0:20:54.240 do whatever I want for twenty one fucking years and 0:20:54.280 --> 0:20:57.320 I'm gonna graduate soon and it's gonna get real. And 0:20:57.359 --> 0:21:03.600 then I just I mean, I just got really lucky. 0:21:04.000 --> 0:21:08.520 And now I'm now I now I do a podcast. 0:21:09.480 --> 0:21:13.040 Yeah, you know, how is that? How's that going for you? 0:21:14.000 --> 0:21:16.439 Do you like it? Or is there something else that 0:21:16.720 --> 0:21:18.280 are you? Like, A damn it, now I have to 0:21:18.320 --> 0:21:20.040 do this fucking podcast again. 0:21:21.720 --> 0:21:25.280 In this very moment, I'm enjoying our conversation. I think 0:21:25.280 --> 0:21:29.280 it's because I'm on a little bit of caffeine, and 0:21:29.320 --> 0:21:31.400 it's also it's you're an easy person. I think you're 0:21:31.440 --> 0:21:35.000 an easy person to to talk to. I like because 0:21:35.040 --> 0:21:39.680 some you know, I like, I appreciate callers who will 0:21:39.720 --> 0:21:44.280 let me just go on really long rants an interrut. 0:21:44.320 --> 0:21:46.200 Oh yeah, I didn't even think you were gonna I 0:21:46.240 --> 0:21:47.879 didn't think I was gonna get on. So I'm like 0:21:47.960 --> 0:21:48.840 not prepared at all. 0:21:49.440 --> 0:21:51.720 Okay, that's okay, that's okay. There's nothing to prepare for. 0:21:53.400 --> 0:21:57.760 That's the guys, and there's other things I want to do. 0:21:57.840 --> 0:22:01.560 But I'm enjoying. I mean, it's nice. It's nice to 0:22:01.600 --> 0:22:03.760 get to talk to so many people. You know, it's 0:22:03.800 --> 0:22:06.760 been it's been great. Before this, my plan, I had 0:22:06.760 --> 0:22:11.399 a plan though. My plan was that I was going 0:22:11.480 --> 0:22:17.879 to I had been like helping like some of my 0:22:18.119 --> 0:22:24.040 dad's friends with like doing video, like helping them they 0:22:24.359 --> 0:22:27.560 ran like they're own, like law firms, and so I 0:22:27.640 --> 0:22:31.600 was helping them like make their make YouTube videos on 0:22:31.640 --> 0:22:36.320 Facebook videos to promote their law firms. And so that 0:22:36.320 --> 0:22:38.320 that was my plan. My plan was I was going 0:22:38.400 --> 0:22:43.000 to be like a social media manager for like dentists 0:22:43.040 --> 0:22:48.399 and lawyers and uh like small businesses, and I was 0:22:48.400 --> 0:22:50.040 gonna The plan was I was going to do that 0:22:50.880 --> 0:22:57.320 to make money and then on the side, uh, make 0:22:57.400 --> 0:22:59.480 my own videos and stuff. 0:23:00.600 --> 0:23:03.959 Yeah, that's kind of my plan right now. Honestly, I'm 0:23:04.040 --> 0:23:06.280 just like praying I can get a social media type 0:23:06.359 --> 0:23:09.040 job at least to say, I use my degree for 0:23:09.080 --> 0:23:12.359 a few years and then maybe I'll like magically figure 0:23:12.400 --> 0:23:14.720 out what I'm am like actually super into. 0:23:18.280 --> 0:23:20.439 I mean you want to you want to pick what? 0:23:20.640 --> 0:23:23.679 What would you say? You want to sell apples? Is 0:23:23.720 --> 0:23:25.760 that like a are you being specific? Or is that 0:23:25.800 --> 0:23:28.240 a is that is does sell apples? Is that a 0:23:28.280 --> 0:23:33.200 broad way of saying do something simple? And you know real? 0:23:34.720 --> 0:23:37.520 You know I It's it's more of just like a 0:23:37.840 --> 0:23:41.679 like a space filler, I guess, because like my my 0:23:41.840 --> 0:23:44.800 biggest problem is that I really I have like this 0:23:44.880 --> 0:23:47.399 sounds so depressing, but I have no passions. I feel 0:23:47.400 --> 0:23:50.439 like like my when you were sitting there talking about 0:23:50.480 --> 0:23:55.600 like literally just eating and watching YouTube. I've seriously considered. 0:23:55.680 --> 0:23:58.119 I'm like, should I do muck thangs? Like should I 0:23:58.160 --> 0:24:00.280 get famous for like being a fat ass or something? 0:24:01.000 --> 0:24:06.119 But like selling apples is just like a you know, 0:24:07.640 --> 0:24:13.480 like my just my blank spot for trying to figure 0:24:13.520 --> 0:24:15.359 out like what the fuck I actually want to do, 0:24:15.720 --> 0:24:18.399 because right now I sell T shirts and I'm like, 0:24:18.880 --> 0:24:22.000 if I was getting paid like ten more dollars an hour, 0:24:22.160 --> 0:24:24.320 I really like this would be fine, you know what 0:24:24.359 --> 0:24:26.359 I mean. And that's like kind of I don't know. 0:24:26.440 --> 0:24:29.800 I want to be like, oh, like let me aspire 0:24:29.880 --> 0:24:32.160 to be something great. But like also like if I'm 0:24:32.200 --> 0:24:34.480 making money and doing an easy job, like I feel 0:24:34.480 --> 0:24:36.240 like I cannot complain, you know what I mean. 0:24:36.880 --> 0:24:41.160 Yeah, I I know exactly what you mean. I've been 0:24:41.280 --> 0:24:46.520 thinking about that a lot. I genuinely have. I've been 0:24:46.560 --> 0:24:53.840 thinking a lot about like, you know, I mean, there's 0:24:53.920 --> 0:24:56.840 infinite different ways to live life, and you don't and 0:24:56.880 --> 0:25:02.520 you can actually even kind of weave in and out 0:25:02.800 --> 0:25:09.400 of phases of your life where where like at some. 0:25:13.600 --> 0:25:13.840 I guess. 0:25:14.040 --> 0:25:14.200 Yeah. 0:25:14.240 --> 0:25:17.600 The thing I've been thinking about is like is it 0:25:17.680 --> 0:25:22.480 okay to just fucking live or do you always have 0:25:22.560 --> 0:25:25.480 to be like you're talking about, like striving to be 0:25:26.240 --> 0:25:32.160 great and striving to do be amazing. You know, it's 0:25:32.160 --> 0:25:33.240 a lot of pressure. 0:25:33.200 --> 0:25:36.359 And I do I think it's I think it's totally 0:25:36.359 --> 0:25:39.360 fine to like have a humble living and like live 0:25:39.440 --> 0:25:43.240 your life. Yeah, but I guess I guess kind of 0:25:43.400 --> 0:25:47.600 was like, you know, I'm always on the Instagrams and 0:25:47.640 --> 0:25:50.680 the whatevers, and it's just like you see these people 0:25:50.720 --> 0:25:54.280 doing like insanely crazy things, like in your face all 0:25:54.359 --> 0:25:56.920 fucking day, and it's like, god damn it. Like I'm 0:25:56.960 --> 0:25:59.679 sitting here like hitting my vapes in the back of 0:25:59.680 --> 0:26:00.640 this tea shop. 0:26:01.240 --> 0:26:06.960 Dude, our fucking brains are not We're not meant to 0:26:07.080 --> 0:26:10.600 be I really do I really feel you on on 0:26:11.000 --> 0:26:12.920 all these things that you're talking about. They're all things 0:26:12.960 --> 0:26:17.200 I've been thinking about because I'm also on Instagram seeing 0:26:17.200 --> 0:26:19.320 people do cool things, and I'm like, gosh, should be 0:26:19.920 --> 0:26:24.600 doing more cool things. You know, our brain, our fucking 0:26:24.680 --> 0:26:29.680 brains are not meant to be doing this shit like 0:26:29.720 --> 0:26:32.320 we were. We were supposed to like live our own 0:26:32.440 --> 0:26:36.679 lives and because we had no other reference point, just 0:26:36.760 --> 0:26:39.439 be like, oh, the best thing you could do with 0:26:39.520 --> 0:26:43.040 your life is dig holes in the dirt for eighty years. 0:26:43.760 --> 0:26:49.240 And in some ways some in some ways it's a 0:26:49.320 --> 0:26:54.639 negative that we're exposed to fucking literally everything all the time, 0:26:54.880 --> 0:26:58.280 and then in some ways it's positive because it could 0:26:58.320 --> 0:27:03.960 be you know, inspiring to do Yeah, you know, in 0:27:04.280 --> 0:27:06.400 some way, I guess it. I guess with a lot 0:27:06.440 --> 0:27:09.959 of shit. It just kind of depends on how you 0:27:10.000 --> 0:27:15.040 look at it. Well, okay, so when when you're having 0:27:15.080 --> 0:27:19.080 everything shoved in your face on the computer, are there 0:27:19.119 --> 0:27:21.080 things in particular that jump out at you where you're like, oh, 0:27:21.119 --> 0:27:26.720 I wish I was uh surfing or I don't whatever 0:27:26.760 --> 0:27:30.159 it is, you know. 0:27:30.560 --> 0:27:35.480 I so I like I like to watch the like 0:27:35.720 --> 0:27:40.080 travel vlogs or whatever. But also another weird thing is 0:27:40.119 --> 0:27:44.080 that like like when given the opportunity to like leave 0:27:44.119 --> 0:27:46.800 the country or like, you know, I had all these 0:27:46.840 --> 0:27:50.000 like study abroad opportunities in college, like I'm just like, no, 0:27:50.680 --> 0:27:53.040 I don't know, I don't have a passport, Like I've 0:27:53.080 --> 0:27:55.199 never left the country, and like I also don't have 0:27:55.240 --> 0:27:58.159 like a dying urge to do so. And I'm like 0:27:58.280 --> 0:28:00.720 is that weird? Because everyone's like like, oh, you don't 0:28:00.720 --> 0:28:03.240 want to go on this little trip with me to 0:28:03.280 --> 0:28:08.080 this other country, and I'm like, look like, I don't know. 0:28:08.160 --> 0:28:12.399 I feel like I I find some comfort in sitting 0:28:12.400 --> 0:28:14.520 there and just like watching other people do shit. But 0:28:14.600 --> 0:28:16.640 then like every now and then I'll be like, oh 0:28:16.680 --> 0:28:19.320 my god, like at least just like get up and 0:28:19.359 --> 0:28:22.080 open a window or some shit, you know, like feel 0:28:22.240 --> 0:28:25.639 feel some real error on you, Like you don't have 0:28:25.680 --> 0:28:27.280 to like go hop on a plane right now, but 0:28:27.400 --> 0:28:29.680 like figure something out. 0:28:29.800 --> 0:28:30.600 I don't know. 0:28:30.400 --> 0:28:33.560 I don't think it's easier to get down on yourself 0:28:33.680 --> 0:28:35.680 when when all of that is happening, it's just like 0:28:35.680 --> 0:28:38.200 where should I even start? I guess, well. 0:28:37.960 --> 0:28:39.280 That I don't know. I mean, is it just like 0:28:39.320 --> 0:28:41.760 a sense of like all feeling guilty because you're not 0:28:42.440 --> 0:28:46.480 doing enough? Or is it like, oh I actively I 0:28:46.480 --> 0:28:49.320 mean you know it's something you don't actively want to 0:28:50.880 --> 0:28:51.520 do any of that. 0:28:51.640 --> 0:28:53.520 Yeah, I guess it's more like should I feel like 0:28:53.560 --> 0:28:55.280 I want to be doing this for everyone else is? 0:28:55.360 --> 0:28:57.600 But like I wouldn't even know that everyone else is 0:28:57.640 --> 0:29:00.160 if I wasn't, so just like on my phone, know 0:29:00.360 --> 0:29:02.280 what I mean, it's really that damn phone. 0:29:02.560 --> 0:29:06.840 Like, but well, here's an here's another thing to think 0:29:06.880 --> 0:29:12.920 about God, I am, I'm I'm such a hypocrite with this, 0:29:13.560 --> 0:29:15.840 but I've been thinking about it because I'm also at 0:29:15.880 --> 0:29:19.240 a like a little inflection point where I'm trying to 0:29:19.240 --> 0:29:29.240 figure out, you know, my passions and dive deeper into them. 0:29:29.800 --> 0:29:34.880 But it's like the the the action I'm gonna I am. 0:29:34.960 --> 0:29:37.959 If you saw how I spent my day today, you 0:29:38.040 --> 0:29:39.920 would kill me for saying this, But it is. I 0:29:40.440 --> 0:29:42.480 But you have to believe in the idea, not the 0:29:42.560 --> 0:29:46.640 fact that I scrolled Instagram for like five fucking hours today. 0:29:46.800 --> 0:29:53.000 The action predicates the motivation, you know what I mean? Okay, 0:29:53.440 --> 0:29:59.080 So like so like, look, you're never gonna know if 0:29:59.320 --> 0:30:03.920 you like traveling abroad or doing whatever the fuck these 0:30:03.920 --> 0:30:09.040 things or selling fucking apples unless if you like, go 0:30:09.120 --> 0:30:13.040 do it, you know, right, So I mean, give it. 0:30:13.080 --> 0:30:16.000 If you can give it a shot, give it, you know, 0:30:16.160 --> 0:30:18.600 give it a shot, and then you'll see and then 0:30:18.960 --> 0:30:20.840 and then it's nice, right because if you go to 0:30:21.280 --> 0:30:23.640 France or whatever and you get there and you're like, 0:30:23.800 --> 0:30:26.160 I really wish I was eating a sandwich and watching 0:30:26.200 --> 0:30:29.720 TV right now, then great, you did it. You have 0:30:29.880 --> 0:30:33.440 verifiable evidence that you don't actually want to do any 0:30:33.440 --> 0:30:35.160 of this shit. I don't know. I don't know where 0:30:35.160 --> 0:30:37.480 I stand on that side. I've been thinking, I really 0:30:37.640 --> 0:30:40.640 truly it's sorta Maddie matt I ever really truly have 0:30:40.680 --> 0:30:45.360 been thinking about this a lot lately, about like feeling 0:30:47.240 --> 0:30:51.800 guilty because you feel like you should want something but 0:30:51.840 --> 0:30:56.120 then not inherently craving it, And I don't know where 0:30:56.120 --> 0:30:59.880 I land on it. I think I land on the 0:31:00.240 --> 0:31:05.720 idea that the action predicates the motivation and that you 0:31:05.760 --> 0:31:09.920 know you do shit, and then fucking yeah, I think that. 0:31:10.040 --> 0:31:11.960 I think that's where I ultimately land on. Because you 0:31:12.000 --> 0:31:14.560 don't want to be you don't want to be like 0:31:14.640 --> 0:31:18.920 eighty because, like you said, as you realized, you will 0:31:18.960 --> 0:31:23.720 be uh old, and you don't want to you don't 0:31:23.720 --> 0:31:28.520 want to regret things. But it's also so fucking ea, 0:31:28.680 --> 0:31:34.240 I'm realizing this. It's also so fucking easy. If you're eighty, 0:31:34.400 --> 0:31:36.920 it would be really easy for you to go. I 0:31:37.560 --> 0:31:39.640 swear on my life, if you're eighty, it would be 0:31:39.640 --> 0:31:42.040 really easy for you to go. You know, I spent 0:31:42.120 --> 0:31:49.000 my life eating sandwiches and watching TV, and honestly, at 0:31:49.000 --> 0:31:52.160 the age of eighty, now that it's all over, I 0:31:52.200 --> 0:31:56.720 had a great time doing that and then die. Why not? 0:31:57.320 --> 0:31:59.960 Why not? Why not? Everyone talks about the deathbed like 0:32:00.080 --> 0:32:04.360 it's such and this is all very demotivational. But I 0:32:04.440 --> 0:32:07.000 really have been thinking about that because, you know what, 0:32:07.080 --> 0:32:10.760 if you got I really because when I sit down 0:32:11.160 --> 0:32:13.240 and I eat a sandwich, I was just telling you, 0:32:13.240 --> 0:32:14.920 When I eat the fucking sandwich in the frize and 0:32:14.960 --> 0:32:19.480 I'm watching a YouTube video of ten facts you didn't 0:32:19.480 --> 0:32:23.200 know about Zelda's Skywards Sword, I really can I really 0:32:23.200 --> 0:32:25.440 have tapped into this ability in this moment to be like, 0:32:25.880 --> 0:32:29.080 what an honor it is to eat of this bread 0:32:29.640 --> 0:32:32.920 and watch of the YouTube video? What an honor it is? 0:32:33.360 --> 0:32:35.560 And I think when I'm on my deathbed, I could like, 0:32:35.560 --> 0:32:39.200 if I died tomorrow, you know, I don't think I 0:32:39.200 --> 0:32:43.120 would regret the time I spent doing that. I mean, 0:32:43.200 --> 0:32:46.720 i'd like to. I'm very happy that I got to 0:32:46.800 --> 0:32:50.000 also go on lots of adventures and have great relationships 0:32:50.040 --> 0:32:53.880 and with friends, and do work that I was proud 0:32:53.920 --> 0:32:58.880 of and what and I ultimately would like to do 0:32:58.960 --> 0:33:03.600 more of those things and less eating sandwiches and watching TV. 0:33:03.880 --> 0:33:06.880 But if it ended up that all you ever did 0:33:07.120 --> 0:33:10.880 was eat sandwiches, and watch TV. You could you could 0:33:11.160 --> 0:33:15.160 feasibly make peace with that in a way that wouldn't 0:33:15.160 --> 0:33:16.600 be absurd. 0:33:17.880 --> 0:33:20.840 You know, there's really there was really no other time 0:33:21.200 --> 0:33:23.600 like in human history where someone could do that, you know. 0:33:23.760 --> 0:33:31.240 Yeah, yeah, basic basic humanity is Like what do you 0:33:31.520 --> 0:33:34.760 have parents? Right? Mm hmm, Like do you have a 0:33:34.800 --> 0:33:37.280 good relationship with them? 0:33:37.360 --> 0:33:39.880 Yeah, just like yeah, we're all right. 0:33:40.600 --> 0:33:42.680 Do you have friends? 0:33:43.400 --> 0:33:47.520 Yeah, sorta. I I definitely have friends. I guess that's 0:33:47.520 --> 0:33:50.680 another thing, Like since I've moved. I've been in a 0:33:50.680 --> 0:33:55.240 different state now for like four years now, and it's 0:33:55.240 --> 0:33:57.360 been a lot harder to make friends for some reason. 0:33:57.480 --> 0:33:59.120 Like I feel like the older you get, the harder 0:33:59.120 --> 0:34:01.200 it is to just be like you want to hang 0:34:01.240 --> 0:34:04.920 out after this or something, you know. But yeah, I 0:34:05.200 --> 0:34:08.200 have a I have a solid little group of people, 0:34:08.480 --> 0:34:10.560 and I have some friends that are gonna move with 0:34:10.560 --> 0:34:12.799 me in the summer. But and you know, I say 0:34:12.800 --> 0:34:14.680 all this like ship, like, oh, I don't know what 0:34:14.719 --> 0:34:16.880 I want to do, but like I am also a 0:34:17.000 --> 0:34:20.359 very lucky person and I've I've like made it this far, 0:34:20.440 --> 0:34:23.799 you know, so something will work out. 0:34:24.120 --> 0:34:26.640 I mean again, if you died tomorrow, you could be like, well, 0:34:26.680 --> 0:34:29.319 I had friends, and I had a decent enough relationship 0:34:29.320 --> 0:34:34.200 with my mom. And yeah, you know, I got to 0:34:34.239 --> 0:34:36.840 watch YouTube. This is great. 0:34:37.080 --> 0:34:39.040 Yeah, I got to talk to the therapy. Get go. 0:34:40.120 --> 0:34:45.080 I I really it's I it's cool going to talk 0:34:45.080 --> 0:34:47.239 to you about all this, because I swear I've been 0:34:47.280 --> 0:34:54.000 like deep in thought about uh like ambition and whatnot. 0:34:57.920 --> 0:35:01.960 I'm always it's a personal it's a person no choice. Well, 0:35:02.040 --> 0:35:02.759 you know, I. 0:35:02.680 --> 0:35:05.880 Also will say I used to be like, you know, 0:35:06.320 --> 0:35:09.440 when I first when I first left my hometown, and 0:35:09.520 --> 0:35:13.440 like my freshman year of college, like I graduated high 0:35:13.480 --> 0:35:16.680 school twenty twenty, so I the whole COVID thing was happening, 0:35:16.920 --> 0:35:21.360 and literally like it was like rock bottom for me. 0:35:21.440 --> 0:35:25.000 I was literally sick every day. I went to college 0:35:25.000 --> 0:35:27.080 and lost like fifty pounds and I like came back 0:35:27.080 --> 0:35:30.920 looking sickly or whatever. And like now I work nine 0:35:30.960 --> 0:35:33.120 to five and I go to the gym after and 0:35:33.160 --> 0:35:36.360 I eat Quen wall So it's like I'm doing something. 0:35:37.520 --> 0:35:40.520 But then it's like, you know, I don't I know, right, 0:35:40.520 --> 0:35:44.040 I am like quen wah. But literally it's like I 0:35:44.320 --> 0:35:47.200 gotta get I gotta keep getting better, I guess in 0:35:47.239 --> 0:35:50.520 my head. And but I have been a lot worse. 0:35:50.560 --> 0:35:53.560 So it's like, oh, I'm doing I'm doing good now 0:35:54.480 --> 0:35:56.000 I have better and. 0:35:56.000 --> 0:35:59.480 I have this theory. I have this theory. I have 0:35:59.560 --> 0:36:05.200 not experienced it in my personal life, but I I 0:36:05.239 --> 0:36:10.920 am optimistically believing that it is possible. My theory is 0:36:10.920 --> 0:36:18.520 that it it is possible to achieve things and improve 0:36:18.600 --> 0:36:25.319 it life and be ambitious without fucking hating yourself. I 0:36:25.360 --> 0:36:29.279 have not gotten experience. I have not yet personally experienced this, 0:36:29.800 --> 0:36:34.880 but I have to believe it's possible. Maybe maybe it's like, like, 0:36:35.000 --> 0:36:43.520 I like, I can you be ambitious from a place 0:36:43.600 --> 0:36:46.319 of not hating yourself, because there's a weird like when 0:36:46.480 --> 0:36:48.960 like being ambitious and like wanting to improve yourself and 0:36:48.960 --> 0:36:53.359 do stuff kind of comes with the inherent partilate that 0:36:53.440 --> 0:37:01.400 you are not enough. And I argue, I have you know, 0:37:01.520 --> 0:37:03.719 ambitious friends, and I argue with We kind of talked 0:37:03.760 --> 0:37:06.200 back and forth about the whole like being enough thing, 0:37:06.280 --> 0:37:10.200 and I'm I don't like I get I guess like 0:37:10.239 --> 0:37:13.520 if you're like unhappy, like I think it's a weird 0:37:13.800 --> 0:37:16.640 paradox because like you take people who are like unhappy 0:37:17.480 --> 0:37:19.239 and you try to and you say like, oh, but 0:37:19.360 --> 0:37:21.920 you are enough as you are, and it's like, well, 0:37:21.920 --> 0:37:23.640 if I'm enough as I am, why why am I 0:37:23.719 --> 0:37:30.120 fucking miserable? You know? So on that sense, I I 0:37:30.200 --> 0:37:34.799 don't like the the the movement of you are enough. 0:37:35.480 --> 0:37:37.279 But then I like, when I look at it on 0:37:37.320 --> 0:37:40.279 the flip side, I'm like, well, you know you never 0:37:40.400 --> 0:37:44.480 get there. You know you can have infinite improvement and 0:37:44.520 --> 0:37:49.000 infinite success and it will never be enough, And so 0:37:49.040 --> 0:37:53.600 what you just hate yourself into improvement forever? That's that 0:37:53.719 --> 0:37:59.880 also seems fucked to me. So I don't know the answer. 0:38:00.239 --> 0:38:03.200 The answer lies somewhere in the middle. I haven't figured 0:38:03.239 --> 0:38:05.799 it out yet, but I think there's I think there's 0:38:05.800 --> 0:38:09.040 a balance. It's it's gotta be some balance of the two, 0:38:09.160 --> 0:38:12.680 because if you're just just accepting that you're enough and 0:38:12.719 --> 0:38:16.080 you're miserable all the time, then you're something's clearly off. 0:38:16.840 --> 0:38:19.279 But if the opposite is just hating yourself forever, then 0:38:19.400 --> 0:38:20.560 what kind of life is that? 0:38:20.760 --> 0:38:20.960 You know? 0:38:22.280 --> 0:38:24.240 I do kind of feel like some of the most 0:38:24.280 --> 0:38:30.120 like ambitious people in my life also have this, like, like, Okay, 0:38:30.200 --> 0:38:33.400 my best friend she is in like every college club 0:38:33.840 --> 0:38:37.319 dean's list every year, winning awards all the time for 0:38:37.520 --> 0:38:39.799 some shit I didn't even know she was doing, but 0:38:39.920 --> 0:38:44.799 then will tell me like all the time, like I 0:38:44.880 --> 0:38:48.279 literally like everything I do, like I hate myself, you 0:38:48.280 --> 0:38:50.960 know what I mean. And I'm like how And I'm like, okay, yeah, 0:38:51.120 --> 0:38:54.520 me too, But how is this manifesting so differently like 0:38:54.560 --> 0:38:56.839 in our two lives? Because when I'm having that like 0:38:56.880 --> 0:38:59.640 I fucking hate myself thing, I will shut down for 0:38:59.640 --> 0:39:03.920 a week and like consider quitting my job and just 0:39:03.960 --> 0:39:07.160 self distruct I guess. But she will just keep picking 0:39:07.239 --> 0:39:11.840 up things and has like an extensive resume And I'm like, how, 0:39:12.040 --> 0:39:13.799 you know, do you know anyone like that? Do you 0:39:13.800 --> 0:39:14.919 have anyone like that in your life? 0:39:15.200 --> 0:39:17.880 Yeah? Yeah, absolutely I don't. 0:39:18.000 --> 0:39:20.160 I'm like, how did you How did she get that 0:39:20.280 --> 0:39:20.920 into the stick? 0:39:20.960 --> 0:39:21.880 And I didn't, you know. 0:39:22.280 --> 0:39:24.600 And it's the same with like those ultra running people, 0:39:24.840 --> 0:39:28.680 like well they'll run for like one hundred miles and 0:39:28.680 --> 0:39:32.040 be like yeah, like something super traumatic happened in my 0:39:32.080 --> 0:39:34.279 life to where this is what I do now, And 0:39:34.320 --> 0:39:37.640 I'm like, god damn, Like if something traumatic happened in 0:39:37.719 --> 0:39:40.560 my life, like I'd probably be sitting here eating the 0:39:40.640 --> 0:39:44.440 pizza still, you know what I mean, Like, yeah, yeah. 0:39:44.520 --> 0:39:47.880 I always think about those like people who don't have 0:39:48.040 --> 0:39:51.000 arms and legs that like didn't fucking go climb a mountain, 0:39:51.520 --> 0:39:52.120 you know what I mean? 0:39:52.239 --> 0:39:57.239 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I have arms and legs, and I 0:39:57.560 --> 0:40:01.080 still didn't climb the mountain. But Monday one day, I might. 0:40:02.920 --> 0:40:05.120 I don't. I actually, I'm not gonna say I don't 0:40:05.120 --> 0:40:06.719 have answers to all these things, because I actually think 0:40:06.719 --> 0:40:11.080 I do or I don't. No, No, I don't have answers, 0:40:11.120 --> 0:40:13.520 but I'm I have theories and I'm working on them. 0:40:13.840 --> 0:40:20.840 I think my current theory is, uh, well, like I 0:40:21.000 --> 0:40:27.080 procrastinated all day on making a fucking video, and then 0:40:27.120 --> 0:40:31.360 once I actually finished it, I felt good. And then 0:40:32.280 --> 0:40:35.400 I so I think there's got to be a balance 0:40:35.640 --> 0:40:41.239 of like, Okay, you don't procrastinate and like do the 0:40:41.280 --> 0:40:45.160 things you want to do and make the things you're 0:40:45.160 --> 0:40:50.120 trying to make, and then you'll feel better when you 0:40:50.320 --> 0:40:55.000 make those positive choices and changes, and then from there 0:40:55.360 --> 0:40:58.200 you actually do yeah, and then from there you know, 0:40:58.520 --> 0:41:04.840 drink as much as you want and gamble and watch 0:41:04.880 --> 0:41:06.080 YouTube and. 0:41:08.160 --> 0:41:09.320 You mean, like as a reward. 0:41:10.000 --> 0:41:11.520 I don't know. I don't know what I mean, I 0:41:11.560 --> 0:41:13.440 really don't, but I'm. 0:41:13.280 --> 0:41:16.359 Because I'll do that. I'll do I'll do one good 0:41:16.400 --> 0:41:20.080 thing in my day. And then I'm like, oh, I 0:41:20.120 --> 0:41:23.560 can do whatever I want now. Like, for example, I 0:41:23.680 --> 0:41:28.000 usually go out on Thursdays and do karaoke, and last 0:41:28.000 --> 0:41:30.759 Thursday I didn't go, and I was like, since I 0:41:30.800 --> 0:41:33.919 won't be spending money at karaoke, I can go eat 0:41:34.000 --> 0:41:38.000 four donuts for breakfast today, Yeah, as a reward. And 0:41:38.040 --> 0:41:40.160 then it's just like, well, that wasn't a reward. You 0:41:40.480 --> 0:41:42.600 You might as well have just gotten done karaoke and 0:41:42.640 --> 0:41:43.600 spent your money, you know. 0:41:43.800 --> 0:41:45.759 But now see how great would your day be if 0:41:45.760 --> 0:41:48.200 you went you took a long walk and you're like, 0:41:48.239 --> 0:41:50.480 all right, I achieved my fitness goal for the day. 0:41:50.520 --> 0:41:53.120 I'm gonna go do karaoke. That's a great day. See. 0:41:53.120 --> 0:41:56.000 It's a balance, It's a fucking balance. I think the 0:41:56.120 --> 0:42:00.120 answer I think there's the I think the like the 0:42:00.200 --> 0:42:04.560 capitalist thing of like you are never enough and you 0:42:04.640 --> 0:42:11.000 must keep improving is not like there's like something that 0:42:11.320 --> 0:42:16.080 gets somewhere between. There's something like the philosophies of like 0:42:16.280 --> 0:42:19.600 the socialist you are enough and everything is fine all 0:42:19.640 --> 0:42:23.080 the time, Like there's something in between those two they're 0:42:23.160 --> 0:42:25.600 like something we need a balance of the two. 0:42:25.800 --> 0:42:30.080 There is I think one one other thing not to 0:42:30.200 --> 0:42:35.840 be that guy. I've recently stopped smoking so much weed, 0:42:36.200 --> 0:42:41.919 and like that has been. That's been like the best thing. 0:42:42.200 --> 0:42:44.640 I think. It did make me gain like a ton 0:42:44.680 --> 0:42:47.880 of weight, which kind of sucks. But also like I 0:42:47.960 --> 0:42:51.040 remember to do things and I don't have like that 0:42:51.160 --> 0:42:54.120 constant like oh my god, you fucking suck thing over 0:42:54.160 --> 0:42:57.319 my head at this point, I still do sometimes. And 0:42:57.400 --> 0:43:00.959 also fuck that whole thing where people are like, yeah, 0:43:01.000 --> 0:43:05.960 weed is an addicting because seriously, like there was a 0:43:05.960 --> 0:43:08.879 weird brain switch that happened to me like two years ago, 0:43:09.040 --> 0:43:12.560 where like all of a sudden I would smoke the 0:43:12.640 --> 0:43:15.719 tiniest amount of weed and like just get scared. And 0:43:15.880 --> 0:43:19.680 it still happens, and it's happened. It started two years ago, 0:43:19.719 --> 0:43:21.759 and to this day, I still smoke every day, but 0:43:21.840 --> 0:43:23.400 you know, it's just like before I go to bed 0:43:23.480 --> 0:43:26.160 or whatever, cause I guess it's sort of just like 0:43:26.200 --> 0:43:28.799 a ritual I've built in my head. But like every 0:43:28.880 --> 0:43:31.319 day I smoke my weed and get scared and go 0:43:31.400 --> 0:43:35.400 to sleep, and it's like, man, this shit is fucking addicting, 0:43:35.640 --> 0:43:37.640 Like I don't even know. I don't know what to say. 0:43:37.719 --> 0:43:39.440 It's definitely not like crack or anything. 0:43:40.040 --> 0:43:42.560 It is. It is very hilarious. How many times I've 0:43:42.560 --> 0:43:45.279 been like, Oh, I'm gonna smoke weed before I go 0:43:45.320 --> 0:43:47.239 to the grocery store, and then I have a panic 0:43:47.719 --> 0:43:50.200 the grocery store. And then the next day, dude, and 0:43:50.239 --> 0:43:53.560 then the next day I'm like, I should fucking smoke 0:43:53.600 --> 0:43:55.120 weed before I go to the grocery store. 0:43:55.320 --> 0:43:57.600 Well, it sounds so nice, And it used to be, 0:43:57.840 --> 0:43:59.880 like I'm telling you, like in high school, I was 0:44:00.600 --> 0:44:03.399 literally like all day long, just like high as fuck, 0:44:03.800 --> 0:44:07.040 hitting the dappin, smoking joints, hitting the bong or whatever. 0:44:07.560 --> 0:44:10.720 And now it's like one little rip of the bong 0:44:10.840 --> 0:44:12.960 and it's like ruined my whole day and I have 0:44:13.080 --> 0:44:16.600 to go to sleep. I guess that's part of I've 0:44:16.600 --> 0:44:18.839 heard that happening like to other people, and I guess 0:44:18.840 --> 0:44:21.040 it's just part of Like I guess you just hit 0:44:21.080 --> 0:44:24.319 your limit eventually. But I if you asked me when 0:44:24.360 --> 0:44:27.759 I was seventeen, like, are you gonna be scared of 0:44:27.800 --> 0:44:31.120 weed randomly one day, I'd be like, why would that happen? 0:44:31.360 --> 0:44:33.360 You know, Like I don't know what happened in my brain, 0:44:33.440 --> 0:44:37.480 but I can pinpoint the exact day it happened. And 0:44:37.520 --> 0:44:40.240 it's been that way ever since, and I still haven't stopped. 0:44:40.280 --> 0:44:42.640 I don't know. I don't know what it is, but 0:44:42.800 --> 0:44:45.479 I have. I have significantly cut down and it's been 0:44:45.719 --> 0:44:50.240 super helpful and on the normal side of living honestly. 0:44:50.920 --> 0:44:54.759 Maddie, mm hmm. Is there anything else you want to 0:44:54.760 --> 0:44:56.279 say to the people of the computer before we go? 0:44:59.480 --> 0:45:02.319 No, is not. I really appreciate you picking. 0:45:02.080 --> 0:45:10.320 Up, of course. Good luck with your life. Thank you, Uh, 0:45:10.360 --> 0:45:15.799 you know everything I was gonna say. I was gonna 0:45:15.800 --> 0:45:18.759 say everything will probably be fine, but that yeah, why not? 0:45:19.080 --> 0:45:19.319 Yeah? 0:45:19.360 --> 0:45:22.319 Sure, I mean everything will be fine. Everyone, everything is 0:45:22.360 --> 0:45:27.480 gonna everyone will die, and it will be good because 0:45:27.520 --> 0:45:30.880 that's we'll go back. We'll go, we'll return, We'll return 0:45:31.000 --> 0:45:35.040 to the prodigal son. I don't know what I'm talking about. 0:45:36.840 --> 0:45:38.959 Thank you for calling, Maddy. I'll see you around the universe. 0:45:39.560 --> 0:45:46.040 Lyle bye. That was a nice conversation. That was good. 0:45:49.760 --> 0:45:57.120 I am. Yeah, a lot of those things that Maddie 0:45:57.160 --> 0:46:00.880 was talking about. I was thinking about a lot. 0:46:02.880 --> 0:46:03.080 Yeah. 0:46:03.120 --> 0:46:08.080 I don't know how ambitious you're supposed to be or 0:46:08.120 --> 0:46:11.720 like the weird, like the thing of like, oh, should 0:46:11.719 --> 0:46:19.760 I be feeling certain feelings? I don't know. There's probably 0:46:19.800 --> 0:46:22.200 some book about all this ship that I talk about 0:46:22.239 --> 0:46:24.879 on this show that is like, here's what you here's 0:46:25.000 --> 0:46:27.520 here's what your brain should be doing at all times. 0:46:27.640 --> 0:46:30.280 And I'll just one day I'll find it and everything 0:46:30.280 --> 0:46:32.279 and people will call me and I'll just be like, well, 0:46:32.280 --> 0:46:34.200 here's what it says in the book that knows everything, 0:46:34.640 --> 0:46:37.200 because there's always a fucking book that knows everything. 0:46:38.640 --> 0:46:40.839 Hi, what's your name, Tony the Tiger. 0:46:41.080 --> 0:46:43.000 Tony the Tiger. What's up, Tony the Tiger? What are 0:46:43.040 --> 0:46:43.359 you doing? 0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:43.960 Uh? 0:46:44.000 --> 0:46:46.399 Nothing much, man. I just finished playing pickle ball. It's 0:46:46.440 --> 0:46:48.200 played about an hour and a half to pick a ball, 0:46:48.680 --> 0:46:51.120 So just kind of relaxing for the rest of the night. 0:46:52.520 --> 0:46:54.200 M Is there anything in particular that you called in 0:46:54.320 --> 0:46:55.520 want to talk about Tony the Tiger? 0:46:57.200 --> 0:47:01.080 Yeah, man, I just Uh. I'm graduating from medical school 0:47:01.440 --> 0:47:04.399 in about a month, so it's kind of a big 0:47:04.440 --> 0:47:07.920 transition for me. I'm starting residency in July, so it's 0:47:07.920 --> 0:47:10.279 a big It's a big thing for me, a big 0:47:11.080 --> 0:47:11.840 life event. 0:47:13.840 --> 0:47:17.600 Uh Y, are you excited? What are you in? Residency? 0:47:17.640 --> 0:47:19.760 For like what kind of medicine. 0:47:20.400 --> 0:47:22.839 So internal medicine. So that's like you know when you 0:47:22.880 --> 0:47:25.160 think doctor, that's like the doctor like you know, like 0:47:25.200 --> 0:47:27.360 when you go to the hospital, the one that just 0:47:27.480 --> 0:47:28.960 sees you rounds on you every day. 0:47:30.400 --> 0:47:30.799 That's cool. 0:47:31.200 --> 0:47:32.640 Get kind of like general medicine type. 0:47:33.280 --> 0:47:35.360 You're gonna get to look inside of a lot of ears. 0:47:37.640 --> 0:47:39.800 Well not in the hospital so much. A lot of 0:47:39.840 --> 0:47:42.360 hospitals don't even have that tool to look in the ears. 0:47:42.400 --> 0:47:44.240 You just kind of got to bring your own around. 0:47:44.320 --> 0:47:45.480 And if you don't have it and then you're not 0:47:45.520 --> 0:47:47.360 looking in any years, wait. 0:47:47.239 --> 0:47:49.160 A minute, you have to buy you you're like a 0:47:49.239 --> 0:47:51.719 teacher at an underfunded school. You have to bring your 0:47:51.760 --> 0:47:52.480 own shit. 0:47:53.760 --> 0:47:55.400 I mean a lot of the hospitals, like you go 0:47:55.440 --> 0:47:57.000 in the room and they don't even they don't even 0:47:57.080 --> 0:48:00.239 have like the tools and stuff on the wall all. 0:48:01.040 --> 0:48:04.440 A lot of times that's more in like a clinic. 0:48:04.560 --> 0:48:06.680 That's more in like you go into the clinic, like 0:48:06.760 --> 0:48:10.600 your primarary doctor to get like a check up for 0:48:11.480 --> 0:48:13.120 you know, your struped throat or whatever. 0:48:13.800 --> 0:48:15.719 So you just got like a steph of scope in 0:48:15.760 --> 0:48:18.440 your pocket with your like phone and keys and vape 0:48:18.480 --> 0:48:22.600 and ship and you bring it into the hospital. 0:48:22.960 --> 0:48:25.239 I try to stay away from the vape. I've had 0:48:25.440 --> 0:48:28.520 a couple of classmates that pulled out their vape in 0:48:28.560 --> 0:48:31.239 the hospital, Like we're walking through the er and they 0:48:31.320 --> 0:48:33.920 just start vaping. I'm like, dude, we're gonna get kicked 0:48:33.920 --> 0:48:36.920 out of here, like stop stop sucking vaping, Like just 0:48:36.920 --> 0:48:39.279 walking by the patient room and they just put It's 0:48:39.320 --> 0:48:42.440 just like automatic because like the nicotine addiction, they think, 0:48:42.560 --> 0:48:43.640 do it without thinking about it. 0:48:43.680 --> 0:48:48.680 You know, how was medical school? It sounds like it 0:48:48.760 --> 0:48:49.280 was easy. 0:48:51.719 --> 0:48:54.320 Oh, it was the easiest four years of my life 0:48:54.520 --> 0:48:58.200 for sure. No, it was. It was super hard man. 0:48:58.400 --> 0:49:01.480 I would say the first year, what was the hardest. 0:49:01.880 --> 0:49:03.560 I think you've mentioned that you have friends who were 0:49:03.600 --> 0:49:04.879 in med school or something, but. 0:49:05.000 --> 0:49:06.920 Yeah, I do. I have one of my best friends 0:49:06.960 --> 0:49:08.839 is is about to start as residency. 0:49:10.120 --> 0:49:11.640 Okay, so you know, you know a little bit about it. 0:49:11.680 --> 0:49:14.719 But for the listeners or whatever, it's like first year 0:49:14.760 --> 0:49:17.239 is when you have like all the classes at once. 0:49:17.280 --> 0:49:20.759 So you got like anatomy, like your general class where 0:49:20.800 --> 0:49:23.440 you learn how to like treat patients and be a doctor. 0:49:24.000 --> 0:49:27.640 And then I'm at a doo school, so I'll theopathic medicine, 0:49:27.680 --> 0:49:31.000 so you have to do like spinal manipulation stuff. So 0:49:31.080 --> 0:49:34.719 that's another class. You're doing all that at once, and 0:49:34.760 --> 0:49:39.319 it's just freaking brutal. Like people like either like turn 0:49:39.400 --> 0:49:43.279 to like drugs that first semester or they like like 0:49:43.400 --> 0:49:46.319 try to like you know, fuck the classmates. Like there's 0:49:46.360 --> 0:49:48.239 a lot of like relationships that popped up. Like the 0:49:48.239 --> 0:49:50.600 first semester that was this is everyone was like really stressed, 0:49:50.600 --> 0:49:51.880 you know, and trying to. 0:49:51.920 --> 0:49:55.319 Like doing doing drugs and trying to fuck your classmates 0:49:55.320 --> 0:49:56.799 sounds pretty standard. 0:49:57.280 --> 0:50:01.120 No, oh, that's yeah, that's pretty standards. That's pretty standard stuff. 0:50:01.120 --> 0:50:03.759 So that was across across all disciplines. 0:50:05.920 --> 0:50:08.239 Oh yeah, even if you're like, uh, you know, an 0:50:08.320 --> 0:50:12.040 accountant school, you're also trying to fuck your classmates. So 0:50:12.440 --> 0:50:16.400 it's it's across all disciplines. But that's the hardest semester. 0:50:16.600 --> 0:50:18.680 And then it's like once you figure out how to study, 0:50:18.719 --> 0:50:21.080 you just kind of coast from there and you're just 0:50:21.160 --> 0:50:23.520 kind of chilling trying to get to third year. When 0:50:23.560 --> 0:50:25.520 you're actually third years, like when you do your clinicals 0:50:25.560 --> 0:50:27.120 and you actually like get to go out and you 0:50:27.120 --> 0:50:30.360 have to like you know, sit in your apartment for 0:50:30.400 --> 0:50:33.439 twelve hours a day by yourself, like eating grub hub 0:50:34.040 --> 0:50:37.120 every day. You're actually out in the hospital like doing things. 0:50:37.160 --> 0:50:38.960 That was my like first year, it was just like 0:50:39.040 --> 0:50:42.719 ordering grub Hub and studying. So I got like the 0:50:42.760 --> 0:50:43.640 freshman of fifteen. 0:50:43.880 --> 0:50:50.560 Yeah, are you excited to be a doctor? That's so real. 0:50:50.719 --> 0:50:54.640 That's such a real job. It's an interesting it's an 0:50:54.680 --> 0:51:02.080 interesting thing because like like the previous caller that we talked. 0:51:02.000 --> 0:51:05.040 To, I didn't hear that, but yeah, she. 0:51:05.880 --> 0:51:07.560 Was kind of like, oh, like what am I going 0:51:07.640 --> 0:51:11.319 to be doing when I'm fifty? And I also have 0:51:11.400 --> 0:51:17.000 that thing, and I have some friends who I'm also like, 0:51:17.040 --> 0:51:18.560 what the hell are we going to be doing when 0:51:18.560 --> 0:51:22.160 we're like old and shit? And but what you're doing 0:51:22.239 --> 0:51:25.480 is interesting because you kind of know you're how old 0:51:25.480 --> 0:51:25.680 are you? 0:51:27.800 --> 0:51:29.560 Thirties and my early thirties. 0:51:29.840 --> 0:51:32.799 Early thirties, see, but you kind of know what you're 0:51:32.840 --> 0:51:35.320 going to be doing for the entire rest of your life. 0:51:37.440 --> 0:51:40.440 Yeah, you generally know, Like each day is different. That's why, 0:51:40.560 --> 0:51:42.319 like I like medicine because you're not you're not doing 0:51:42.320 --> 0:51:44.480 the same necessarily the same thing over and over because 0:51:44.480 --> 0:51:47.360 you're seeing different patients. Every day. So but you generally 0:51:47.440 --> 0:51:48.799 know what you're going to be doing, and you have 0:51:48.840 --> 0:51:52.040 like pretty good job security, i'd say, because you actually 0:51:52.080 --> 0:51:55.319 like have like a thought after skill. But you know, 0:51:55.360 --> 0:51:57.560 it's kind of like I think, like coding, you know, 0:51:57.680 --> 0:51:59.399 is another one where you have like job security because 0:51:59.440 --> 0:52:01.600 you have like a sought after school and stuff like that. 0:52:01.680 --> 0:52:04.120 So there's a lot of jobs where it's like, you know, 0:52:04.200 --> 0:52:05.839 you know what you're going to be doing, Like you said, 0:52:05.880 --> 0:52:09.120 until until you're like fifty, you don't have like any 0:52:09.200 --> 0:52:12.239 you know, there's no blackness, you know, kind of in 0:52:12.280 --> 0:52:14.400 front of you for what your career is going to be. 0:52:14.480 --> 0:52:19.320 Like do you like that? I do like that. I 0:52:19.400 --> 0:52:22.120 think it's it just gives you, like it takes one 0:52:22.320 --> 0:52:24.960 more stress out of life. Like you know, there's a 0:52:24.960 --> 0:52:26.719 lot of people who have jobs where like they're not sure. 0:52:26.760 --> 0:52:28.239 I worked at a job where I was like not 0:52:28.280 --> 0:52:30.520 sure if I was going to get laid off, not 0:52:30.520 --> 0:52:32.719 necessarily fired, but like laid off. And I think a 0:52:32.719 --> 0:52:35.160 lot of people have that in their careers and it 0:52:35.200 --> 0:52:37.000 could be any type of job. You know, even doctors 0:52:37.040 --> 0:52:38.840 can get laid off, but like there's less of a 0:52:39.000 --> 0:52:42.640 chance of that, especially if you're at like a hospital 0:52:42.680 --> 0:52:45.319 that's kind of more rural. So I do like that, 0:52:47.280 --> 0:52:50.320 but yeah, I just you know, and I don't really 0:52:50.400 --> 0:52:55.359 I think like it's not the only way to go 0:52:55.480 --> 0:52:57.560 and in your life, you know, like there's tons of 0:52:57.600 --> 0:52:59.600 different career pathways you can go where you have job 0:52:59.600 --> 0:53:02.719 security and doesn't require like an extra seven years just 0:53:02.760 --> 0:53:05.440 to school, you know. So it's like I just did 0:53:05.440 --> 0:53:07.359 it because I couldn't see myself doing anything else. 0:53:07.520 --> 0:53:11.359 You know, that's a great reasons like I do it. 0:53:12.600 --> 0:53:15.560 Can AI replace the doctors or are you guys good. 0:53:17.000 --> 0:53:17.239 Dude? 0:53:17.239 --> 0:53:19.800 I was literally thinking about that today because I was 0:53:19.880 --> 0:53:21.560 I saw a meme or not a meme, but like 0:53:21.560 --> 0:53:25.719 a post about the Medtronic. The company has like a 0:53:25.719 --> 0:53:29.960 new robot where they're they're able to do like the 0:53:30.080 --> 0:53:33.279 surgery general surgeries like appendectomies and stuff like where you 0:53:33.280 --> 0:53:36.319 take your appendix out with's like the same error rate 0:53:36.680 --> 0:53:41.360 as like a regular surgeon. But the robots aren't actually robots. 0:53:41.560 --> 0:53:45.719 They're being controlled by the surgeon like remotely, so there's 0:53:45.719 --> 0:53:49.000 no there's no autonomous robots at this point even remotely 0:53:49.040 --> 0:53:52.040 doing surgery. So it's gonna be a long time. The 0:53:52.080 --> 0:53:54.799 first thing to go. I think it's gonna be like 0:53:55.040 --> 0:53:57.439 radiology because you're like looking at X rays and there's 0:53:57.520 --> 0:54:01.520 like pattern recognition software, you know. And then same thing 0:54:01.560 --> 0:54:04.320 for like pathology, where you're just like looking at microscope slides. 0:54:05.200 --> 0:54:07.440 You're just looking for patterns. So I think that's another 0:54:07.480 --> 0:54:11.120 thing that could be the next one for AI, but 0:54:11.280 --> 0:54:13.400 just for like a regular doctor where you're just like 0:54:14.480 --> 0:54:16.760 you need empathy, you need to talk to the patient, 0:54:16.920 --> 0:54:19.600 talk to the family, make decisions on the fly. That's 0:54:19.640 --> 0:54:20.960 I think that's gonna be a little harder. 0:54:22.400 --> 0:54:25.040 That makes sense there, Yeah, yeah, it does, like uh, 0:54:26.880 --> 0:54:29.120 you know, you want I mean, yeah, part of your 0:54:29.200 --> 0:54:32.319 job is like talking to people and doing stuff that 0:54:32.480 --> 0:54:34.440 I guess a robot can't do. 0:54:36.800 --> 0:54:39.120 Yeah. Yeah, And maybe at some point we'll have like 0:54:39.480 --> 0:54:42.359 freaking matrix robots that just like take over and they're 0:54:42.400 --> 0:54:44.759 the doctors. But I don't know if they'll be evil, 0:54:44.880 --> 0:54:46.680 Maybe they won't want to treat humans, so I don't 0:54:47.400 --> 0:54:49.680 I don't know about that, but maybe at one point 0:54:49.680 --> 0:54:51.719 we'll have that. I don't know. It's gonna be a 0:54:51.719 --> 0:54:53.719 long time, probably. I don't think in our lifetime. Low. 0:54:53.800 --> 0:54:58.400 I think it's gonna be way past when we're or alive, 0:54:58.520 --> 0:55:02.120 that that's gonna be fully like honest robots doing surgery, 0:55:02.280 --> 0:55:03.000 that's my opinion. 0:55:03.120 --> 0:55:06.359 But well that are you excited for that? I mean, 0:55:06.440 --> 0:55:07.720 like do you feel like they'll be better? 0:55:10.800 --> 0:55:13.520 I really think like the biggest thing that patients like 0:55:13.520 --> 0:55:14.920 say to me that they like about me is that 0:55:14.960 --> 0:55:17.920 I'm like generally pretty personal. They're like that. They're like 0:55:17.920 --> 0:55:19.480 the I'm like the nicest person to come in the 0:55:19.520 --> 0:55:22.000 room all day and just talk to them. And you know, 0:55:22.120 --> 0:55:24.239 human touch is another thing. So like I don't know 0:55:24.280 --> 0:55:25.680 if you ever had a doctor that just went in 0:55:25.719 --> 0:55:28.359 and like didn't even touch you, like do a physical exam, 0:55:28.440 --> 0:55:30.360 and you're like, what the fuck's that? Like did he 0:55:30.400 --> 0:55:32.880 even do anything? Or even do anything? So it's like 0:55:33.480 --> 0:55:35.279 that's a big part of being a doctor is like 0:55:35.320 --> 0:55:38.319 the human compassion, human touch aspect. So I mean you 0:55:38.360 --> 0:55:41.960 want like a cold, like silvery robot hand doing a 0:55:41.960 --> 0:55:44.000 physical exam on you, you know, or I guess they 0:55:44.040 --> 0:55:47.200 could they could do like a warming thing of the 0:55:47.239 --> 0:55:50.160 hand with the robots, but I don't know, I think 0:55:50.160 --> 0:55:52.279 that the human side is like a big thing. I thought, 0:55:52.280 --> 0:55:55.239 I'm not really excited for that to be a thing. 0:55:56.920 --> 0:56:00.600 It'll be interesting when like you have kids who grew 0:56:00.760 --> 0:56:03.359 up with robots. 0:56:03.800 --> 0:56:07.160 You know, Well, it'd be like Alledium, like that movie 0:56:07.200 --> 0:56:14.279 with Matt Damon where this guy Elysium where the rich 0:56:14.320 --> 0:56:17.040 people just like go get into a pod with robots 0:56:17.080 --> 0:56:20.520 and they just are like automatically healed. But the poor 0:56:20.520 --> 0:56:25.759 people don't have access to that. It could be like 0:56:25.760 --> 0:56:26.280 that something. 0:56:26.680 --> 0:56:28.560 I think. I think, I think I got to stop 0:56:29.200 --> 0:56:31.160 talking about AI so much. 0:56:31.680 --> 0:56:34.440 Yeah, man, but yeah, just yeah, I'm excited to do 0:56:34.400 --> 0:56:35.960 it for residency. I'm excited to be a doctor. I 0:56:35.960 --> 0:56:37.680 don't have to walk into a room and say I'm 0:56:37.880 --> 0:56:41.440 this I'm student doctor Tony and Tiger, and I can 0:56:41.480 --> 0:56:43.279 just be like, I'm doctor Tony the Tuger. I can 0:56:43.320 --> 0:56:46.560 just actually be more confident. You know what, I. 0:56:46.440 --> 0:56:49.239 Forgot that you started this call by saying that you 0:56:49.280 --> 0:56:50.200 were Tony the Tiger. 0:56:52.760 --> 0:56:56.160 Well, dude, Tony Tiger's a He's a forgotten mascot. 0:56:56.239 --> 0:56:59.000 So I wonder I see when Honestly, when you said that, 0:56:59.080 --> 0:57:00.520 I thought you were going to bed of a dumb 0:57:00.520 --> 0:57:03.600 ass troll. But you're actually like a smart guy. 0:57:05.560 --> 0:57:07.080 I was just trying to come up with the name. Dude, 0:57:07.120 --> 0:57:08.480 I just popped into my head and I was just 0:57:08.520 --> 0:57:12.360 coming up with a stupid team. I don't want to 0:57:12.360 --> 0:57:13.960 troll you, dude, y'll be listening to you. You were 0:57:14.040 --> 0:57:16.880 one of the podcasts that getting me through med school. 0:57:16.880 --> 0:57:16.920 Do. 0:57:16.960 --> 0:57:18.880 I started listening to you my first semester in med 0:57:18.920 --> 0:57:21.600 school and like what, I'm just like vibing out chilling 0:57:21.640 --> 0:57:25.160 after test you. I just listened for like four hours, yeah, 0:57:25.200 --> 0:57:28.280 and just like chill. So I think you you can, 0:57:28.280 --> 0:57:30.160 I can. I shout out a couple other my podcasts 0:57:30.160 --> 0:57:34.960 that got me through the tough time. Go ahead, bad friends, 0:57:35.000 --> 0:57:37.440 Bobby Lee, my boy Andrew Sentino. I know Bobby Lee 0:57:37.520 --> 0:57:41.200 was on your your podcast, and then uh ceo Von 0:57:41.360 --> 0:57:44.560 this past weekend. He's he's a cool, cool dude. So 0:57:45.000 --> 0:57:47.200 those ones have been great, dude. And then I got 0:57:47.200 --> 0:57:49.840 into doctor Drew after seeing uh seeing him on your 0:57:49.840 --> 0:57:50.720 podcast also. 0:57:50.760 --> 0:57:56.680 Yeah yeah, so yeah, there's. 0:57:56.600 --> 0:57:59.240 Just like yat to have someone anyone's thinking about doing 0:57:59.320 --> 0:58:01.520 some sort of horror graduate agree now as med school 0:58:01.560 --> 0:58:03.360 or anything, you got to have like some sort of outlet, 0:58:03.440 --> 0:58:06.440 you know, the whether it's like chilling listening podcast. I 0:58:06.480 --> 0:58:08.080 just would go for a three four out walk and 0:58:08.120 --> 0:58:10.800 just listen to therapy. Get go just kind of chill 0:58:10.880 --> 0:58:14.120 and get out, like you said, you always say get outside, 0:58:14.120 --> 0:58:17.680 like that's anyone can just go outside, just walk outside. 0:58:18.120 --> 0:58:18.280 You know. 0:58:18.920 --> 0:58:21.800 I kind of like bringing this back to the previous 0:58:21.800 --> 0:58:24.320 conversation that I just had, and I know you weren't 0:58:24.320 --> 0:58:27.600 there for it, but it was a lot about like 0:58:29.160 --> 0:58:34.760 ambition versus not and talking to you is interesting because 0:58:35.480 --> 0:58:42.560 the world does require the continued existence of the human 0:58:42.760 --> 0:58:45.760 you know what's fucking oh man, okay, hold, I'm about 0:58:45.760 --> 0:58:51.080 to fuck my mind. The continued existence of the human 0:58:51.200 --> 0:58:56.000 race is kind of dependent upon people having ambition, because 0:58:56.000 --> 0:58:59.080 we need people like you to be ambitious enough to 0:58:59.120 --> 0:59:05.320 go become doctors. So if everyone decided that watching TV 0:59:05.400 --> 0:59:09.160 and eating sandwiches was enough, we'd be fucked. But also, 0:59:11.200 --> 0:59:13.840 but also also on top of that, I. 0:59:14.080 --> 0:59:16.800 Kind of have a little part of me that goes, 0:59:17.560 --> 0:59:20.160 you know what, if the human race died out because 0:59:20.160 --> 0:59:23.120 we all got lazy and decided that eating sandwiches was enough, 0:59:23.320 --> 0:59:28.600 and then we all died, maybe it kind of really 0:59:28.840 --> 0:59:31.280 was enough and we could all just die. 0:59:32.520 --> 0:59:36.040 That's insane. I'm insane. I gotta stop talking like this. 0:59:36.320 --> 0:59:39.120 I really I don't know what the fuck happened to me. 0:59:39.840 --> 0:59:42.320 You've been listening to me, What's what is this? Okay? 0:59:42.440 --> 0:59:44.240 You've been listening to me go crazy for a month. 0:59:44.440 --> 0:59:47.000 What does that sound like to you? Am I insane? 0:59:47.560 --> 0:59:49.400 Dude? I love it. I know you're just because you've 0:59:49.400 --> 0:59:51.960 been driving a lot and you've been like probably really tired, 0:59:52.040 --> 0:59:54.760 and just like had the opportunity to be like thinking 0:59:54.840 --> 0:59:56.760 all the time because you're I mean, I'm assuming like 0:59:56.760 --> 0:59:58.400 you're traveling alone a lot of times, so you just 0:59:58.840 --> 1:00:01.720 when you have the time to think by yourself, sometimes 1:00:01.720 --> 1:00:04.440 you just go into spirals. I think everybody does that, 1:00:04.480 --> 1:00:06.120 Like I've been doing that the third year of med 1:00:06.120 --> 1:00:07.680 school because I don't talk anyone. I just go to 1:00:07.720 --> 1:00:09.680 the hospital and come home and I just think about shit. 1:00:10.240 --> 1:00:12.000 So it's like, it's not You're not going crazy, dude, 1:00:12.040 --> 1:00:14.640 You're just thinking a lot, and you're probably taking yourself 1:00:14.640 --> 1:00:17.800 into like just a bunch of spiraling dark holes. It 1:00:17.800 --> 1:00:21.080 doesn't sound you're definitely different than you were, but you're 1:00:21.120 --> 1:00:23.440 I still love listening to you. Like you're just changing 1:00:23.480 --> 1:00:26.000 with you know, with your experiences and stuff. 1:00:26.600 --> 1:00:29.439 It's scary, though, I don't want to be different than 1:00:29.520 --> 1:00:32.960 how I know. I I've thought myself into. I've kind 1:00:32.960 --> 1:00:36.520 of it feels almost as though I've irreversibly thought myself 1:00:36.600 --> 1:00:41.680 into Like today I was just I was on I 1:00:41.720 --> 1:00:47.160 was procrastinating, and I was like asking chat gybt if 1:00:47.240 --> 1:00:50.240 science could verifiably deny that we are living in a 1:00:50.280 --> 1:00:53.800 simulation and shit like that, And I was really I 1:00:53.800 --> 1:00:56.160 really like like like people say shit like like like 1:00:56.200 --> 1:00:58.400 people get high and say like, oh, could we be 1:00:58.400 --> 1:01:00.560 living in a simulation? But like I felt that, and 1:01:00.560 --> 1:01:02.760 I really felt I really was left for a for 1:01:02.840 --> 1:01:06.040 a while still, I'm like, oh, fuck, are we living 1:01:06.080 --> 1:01:06.760 in a simulation? 1:01:07.040 --> 1:01:09.480 But that's how you my quick thought on that. It's 1:01:09.520 --> 1:01:11.320 like there's a dud that used to listen to you 1:01:11.400 --> 1:01:13.760 on Serious XM and he would just be like, well, 1:01:13.760 --> 1:01:15.720 who the fuck here is if you're living in you know, simulation, 1:01:16.280 --> 1:01:19.800 you still have you're still living. Just enjoy like the experience, 1:01:19.920 --> 1:01:23.400 like everyone dies, like, just enjoy it while you're here. 1:01:23.440 --> 1:01:25.520 And there's probably no way that you're ever gonna know 1:01:25.520 --> 1:01:28.720 if you're living in a simulation, So just keep going. 1:01:28.880 --> 1:01:31.080 Just have fun, go out with friends, you know, do 1:01:31.200 --> 1:01:34.160 fun things, travel like you do, talk to people, and 1:01:34.240 --> 1:01:35.200 just enjoy it, you know. 1:01:35.640 --> 1:01:38.240 Yeah, all these things I'm thinking about. All these things 1:01:38.280 --> 1:01:40.640 I'm thinking about, you're not supposed to be thinking about 1:01:40.640 --> 1:01:41.280 them for too long. 1:01:43.080 --> 1:01:47.120 Yeah, you might. You might have gotten a little bit 1:01:47.120 --> 1:01:47.880 too deep into this. 1:01:48.080 --> 1:01:50.120 I think that's why I got a little bit too deep. 1:01:50.280 --> 1:01:54.200 Outside of the matrix, there's no there's no bottom, there's 1:01:54.200 --> 1:02:00.320 no and you know, getting you know, reading like I 1:02:00.600 --> 1:02:04.640 don't read books. I I don't read books. I adhd 1:02:05.000 --> 1:02:09.200 scramble around Wikipedia, and I was doing that today. I 1:02:09.280 --> 1:02:12.560 was ADHD scrambling around Wikipedia, like looking at like the 1:02:12.560 --> 1:02:18.640 Wikipedia page of consciousness and of like like ship like 1:02:18.720 --> 1:02:23.360 that and like looking at like like skimming through the 1:02:23.400 --> 1:02:27.000 Wikipedia pages of like philosophers is doing that today and 1:02:27.040 --> 1:02:30.959 like reading about like theories of consciousness. And it felt 1:02:31.040 --> 1:02:33.760 important to like dive into a little bit. But you don't, 1:02:33.960 --> 1:02:38.360 you'll you'll it'll it will kind of if you go 1:02:38.520 --> 1:02:48.120 too deep into that, it'll kind of ruin your life. 1:02:44.760 --> 1:02:48.560 Like like athletes or something or like like I love 1:02:48.640 --> 1:02:52.080 Jamie Soox. I just Wikipedia Jamie Fox over and over. Yeah, 1:02:52.200 --> 1:02:55.000 I don't know. I just Wikia like fun things a 1:02:55.040 --> 1:02:56.000 Wikipedia racist. 1:02:56.440 --> 1:02:59.560 Yeah, I used to do that on stream. But if 1:02:59.560 --> 1:03:02.479 you go too deep into like existentialist thoughts and theory 1:03:02.480 --> 1:03:05.880 and stuff. It just will ruin. It ruined my life 1:03:05.880 --> 1:03:07.760 for a little bit. I'm trying to get out of it, 1:03:08.120 --> 1:03:10.600 and I actually think I will. I think the key 1:03:10.680 --> 1:03:11.960 to getting out of it is you got you just 1:03:11.960 --> 1:03:14.800 gotta do. You just gotta be in your life. You 1:03:14.880 --> 1:03:18.120 gotta have responsibilities, you gotta. I mean, you're a great 1:03:18.480 --> 1:03:21.360 example of a real person because you have so many 1:03:22.160 --> 1:03:24.120 like being in residency. I mean, you don't have time 1:03:24.200 --> 1:03:29.280 to think about fucking like what happens after we die, 1:03:29.760 --> 1:03:31.880 because you're so in life. 1:03:32.280 --> 1:03:35.600 It's frozen meals over and in my life. 1:03:35.920 --> 1:03:39.520 That's the key. You gotta be in your life in 1:03:39.560 --> 1:03:41.880 some way, shape or form, whether it's being with people 1:03:42.040 --> 1:03:44.720 or working or what. You gotta be in your life 1:03:44.760 --> 1:03:45.479 because if you if. 1:03:45.400 --> 1:03:47.640 You gotta go do something real, like you gotta do 1:03:47.680 --> 1:03:51.080 something real, solid, objectively real that can get like y'all 1:03:51.120 --> 1:03:52.960 just sit in your room. I know if people I've 1:03:52.960 --> 1:03:54.640 been that way before, while I've been depressed, I just 1:03:54.640 --> 1:03:56.360 want to sit in my room. But you just got 1:03:56.360 --> 1:03:58.680 to force yourself to go out and do things, you know, 1:03:59.120 --> 1:04:00.400 which is easier said and done. 1:04:00.440 --> 1:04:04.560 But I've had too little responsibility because I was touring 1:04:04.600 --> 1:04:06.640 and traveling for a while, and now that I'm now, 1:04:06.680 --> 1:04:10.280 I'm not and I think I've had too little responsive. 1:04:10.880 --> 1:04:17.080 My responsibility has become too little. Now that I'm I thought, 1:04:17.240 --> 1:04:19.040 I literally thought about that. I thought about that. I'm like, 1:04:19.040 --> 1:04:20.800 should I just have a But that's a that's a 1:04:20.800 --> 1:04:22.240 bad reason to have a kid. 1:04:22.880 --> 1:04:25.080 No, I know, don't have kids. Maybe get like a 1:04:25.120 --> 1:04:26.040 goldfish or something. 1:04:26.480 --> 1:04:29.120 I do you have once you yeah, if you have 1:04:29.160 --> 1:04:32.360 too little responsibility, you start thinking and I'm actually I 1:04:32.480 --> 1:04:37.720 mean this, I'm I am glad that I don't think 1:04:37.760 --> 1:04:41.000 this will last forever. I'm optimistic that I'll I'll heal myself. 1:04:41.200 --> 1:04:43.640 But I'm glad I had this little era in my 1:04:43.720 --> 1:04:46.320 life because I think it's an honor as a human 1:04:46.400 --> 1:04:53.120 being to get to this point where you're so did 1:04:53.160 --> 1:04:58.000 like in the like conscious of these crazy kind of 1:04:58.200 --> 1:05:03.320 terrifying existential things, like because I do believe I'll be 1:05:03.320 --> 1:05:05.640 able to like see it and then go back to 1:05:05.840 --> 1:05:08.920 like let me stop at a stop sign and like 1:05:08.960 --> 1:05:12.440 an Instagram put it just like whatever the bullshit of life. 1:05:12.200 --> 1:05:15.480 And everybody goes through it. Dude, there's like it's just 1:05:15.560 --> 1:05:17.760 kind of stupid reference but there's that episode of Knock 1:05:17.800 --> 1:05:21.000 Them Now from the Middle where like Malcolm like goes 1:05:21.000 --> 1:05:23.800 into like the existential crisis and like doesn't believe that 1:05:23.800 --> 1:05:26.680 anything's real and just like super depressed, and like his 1:05:26.800 --> 1:05:29.680 mom's like she's like, don't worry about respent like two 1:05:29.720 --> 1:05:31.760 days in the dryer, just like sitting in the dryer, 1:05:32.480 --> 1:05:35.320 like thinking about life. That's like everyone like experiences that 1:05:35.440 --> 1:05:37.600 kind of thing where they're just like, what is life? 1:05:37.640 --> 1:05:39.600 What the fuck is going on? Some people experienced it 1:05:39.680 --> 1:05:41.479 later than others, you know, I don't. 1:05:41.520 --> 1:05:44.000 I actually I don't know if everyone experiences that. I 1:05:44.040 --> 1:05:48.240 think it's no, Like do you think no some people 1:05:48.280 --> 1:05:51.880 are too, I don't think. I I genuinely I don't 1:05:51.920 --> 1:05:54.720 think every single person experiences that. 1:05:54.760 --> 1:05:57.360 Okay again, Yeah, yeah, it's hard to talking absolute, so 1:05:57.360 --> 1:05:58.400 probably you're probably correct. 1:05:58.440 --> 1:06:01.200 I mean, like, okay again again alluding to the previous 1:06:01.280 --> 1:06:04.000 conversation I just had. We were talking about like people 1:06:04.000 --> 1:06:07.280 who are like eighty years old and like arguing about 1:06:07.320 --> 1:06:11.000 coupons with people or whatever. You know, I'm talking about 1:06:11.000 --> 1:06:11.880 like angry eighty year old. 1:06:12.040 --> 1:06:12.120 Ye. 1:06:12.240 --> 1:06:15.200 I don't. I don't. I think if you're I think 1:06:15.280 --> 1:06:20.920 if you're eighty years old and you are arguing with 1:06:20.960 --> 1:06:25.360 a retail worker, you've probably never had an existential crisis 1:06:25.360 --> 1:06:31.840 in your entire life. I would gander that. 1:06:29.800 --> 1:06:32.000 That's probably true if you're like pinching pennies like that, 1:06:32.160 --> 1:06:34.200 Like what are those people called that are the super 1:06:34.240 --> 1:06:37.120 coupons or whatever that are like they try to they 1:06:37.120 --> 1:06:40.080 spend hours trying to like save money on shit with coupons. 1:06:40.120 --> 1:06:41.360 Those people probably never. 1:06:41.440 --> 1:06:44.200 Yeah, well not necessarily like people who not necessarily like 1:06:44.400 --> 1:06:47.600 penny pinchers, but just people who like they like are like, 1:06:48.480 --> 1:06:52.560 you know, concerned with like complete other. But if you're 1:06:52.600 --> 1:06:54.720 eighty years old and you were just concerned about like 1:06:54.800 --> 1:06:57.320 complete other bullshit that has fucking like nothing to do 1:06:57.480 --> 1:07:03.080 with you, you've probably ever had an existential crisis, which 1:07:03.120 --> 1:07:05.840 is But so I guess I think. 1:07:05.800 --> 1:07:08.440 What's another example of that though, like something that had 1:07:08.480 --> 1:07:11.600 nothing to do with you that is bullshit? What's what's 1:07:11.640 --> 1:07:12.040 one other? 1:07:14.080 --> 1:07:17.720 Let me think, like sorry to challenge you, No, no, no, no, 1:07:18.080 --> 1:07:20.120 this is it's okay. I'm trying. I'm trying to think 1:07:20.160 --> 1:07:22.400 of like concrete examples. 1:07:23.680 --> 1:07:27.800 I'm trying to think of one too, but I don't know, 1:07:27.840 --> 1:07:31.400 like what you're I don't know, like I don't know, 1:07:31.720 --> 1:07:34.320 like what you're like what someone else is wearing, maybe. 1:07:34.080 --> 1:07:38.320 Like yeah, sure sure something like that, you know, or 1:07:38.360 --> 1:07:42.880 I don't know, if you're like crazy what you know 1:07:42.920 --> 1:07:45.840 what you know what I mean though, like people definitely 1:07:46.280 --> 1:07:48.880 people who've never had accidential crisis. So I think by 1:07:48.920 --> 1:07:52.360 that point, like if it is kind of it is 1:07:52.520 --> 1:08:01.080 weirdly an honor to have like a terrifying existential crisis. 1:08:01.400 --> 1:08:05.640 I think it's something to push through and eventually be like, Okay, 1:08:05.720 --> 1:08:12.200 I'm gonna go back into the matrix and be learn 1:08:12.440 --> 1:08:15.800 learn how to accept that you'll never have answers to 1:08:15.880 --> 1:08:19.800 these terrifying questions and like that's fine and okay, and 1:08:20.400 --> 1:08:23.880 like just eat your sandwich and do your job and 1:08:23.960 --> 1:08:25.519 be okay, you know. 1:08:27.120 --> 1:08:31.040 Just eat your sandwich and just kind of. 1:08:32.320 --> 1:08:36.800 Eat your blooney sandwich and look at you know, watch 1:08:36.800 --> 1:08:39.400 a YouTube video and shut up. You know, it's fine, 1:08:40.240 --> 1:08:43.920 shut the fuck up, right, you know, but it's an 1:08:43.920 --> 1:08:45.760 honor that you ever got, and you I don't think 1:08:45.760 --> 1:08:49.360 you can ever fully silence whatever screaming part of your 1:08:49.360 --> 1:08:54.720 brain is is in touch with that, but it's you know, 1:08:54.760 --> 1:08:56.840 it's good to have had that at some point in 1:08:56.880 --> 1:08:59.040 your level before you you know, it's good to have. 1:08:59.439 --> 1:09:03.080 That's the is are Really, there's a higher being things 1:09:03.080 --> 1:09:04.960 that I sound kind of like a douche, but I 1:09:04.960 --> 1:09:05.960 I you. 1:09:05.920 --> 1:09:12.400 Know, I don't know anyway, think you're someone's but. 1:09:11.360 --> 1:09:12.559 I'm sorry you cut out just now. 1:09:13.880 --> 1:09:15.639 Nobody thinks that you're a douche. 1:09:18.040 --> 1:09:18.960 What's your name again? 1:09:21.840 --> 1:09:22.080 Yeah? 1:09:22.560 --> 1:09:28.840 Okay, Well, Tony the Tiger, your phone sucks and I 1:09:28.880 --> 1:09:31.120 can't I can't understand, but it's okay. I was going 1:09:31.160 --> 1:09:33.840 to end the phone call soon. Anyway. I like you, 1:09:33.880 --> 1:09:36.639 Tony the Tiger. You're You're a cool guy. I'm I'm 1:09:37.280 --> 1:09:39.240 I'm happy to live on the same planet as you. 1:09:39.680 --> 1:09:42.480 Uh right now, this is cool. 1:09:43.840 --> 1:09:44.120 Person. 1:09:45.320 --> 1:09:48.840 Yeah, I'm gonna try to win back. Where do you live? Like, 1:09:48.960 --> 1:09:50.240 you don't have to give me your address? 1:09:50.640 --> 1:09:52.800 No, where that you would ever come. It's a it's 1:09:52.800 --> 1:09:54.720 a big college campus, but in a state that you'd 1:09:54.720 --> 1:09:55.640 probably never come to. 1:09:56.080 --> 1:09:57.519 Well, try me what state? 1:09:58.640 --> 1:09:59.240 Arkansas? 1:09:59.680 --> 1:10:08.400 Uh? Where? What's the biggest city in Arkansas? Lafayette? 1:10:08.800 --> 1:10:10.840 To someone the other day, Now you talk to someone 1:10:10.880 --> 1:10:12.960 the other day who's from that town? 1:10:13.439 --> 1:10:14.439 What town? Little Rock? 1:10:14.800 --> 1:10:21.520 Like? No, what's the biggest college University of Arkansas. That's 1:10:21.560 --> 1:10:22.439 the big college here. 1:10:22.720 --> 1:10:23.439 Which city is that? 1:10:25.040 --> 1:10:25.560 Fayetteville? 1:10:26.240 --> 1:10:29.320 Fayetteville, Okay? Is there is that where you live? 1:10:31.880 --> 1:10:33.240 Yeah, I'm in this in this area? 1:10:34.520 --> 1:10:35.320 Is it? What's it like? 1:10:37.320 --> 1:10:39.519 Dude? It's fucking awesome. There's tons of comedy clubs here. 1:10:39.560 --> 1:10:43.080 There's bars, and there's big concert venues and stuff. Bobby 1:10:43.120 --> 1:10:45.880 Lee came here to do a show. We had a 1:10:47.520 --> 1:10:51.799 bunch of comedians. Nate Bargetti came here. 1:10:51.840 --> 1:10:53.640 I would do a show in Fayetville, Arkansas. Well, I 1:10:53.680 --> 1:10:56.800 don't know if anyone would, if people would come, If 1:10:56.840 --> 1:10:58.679 I get like one hundred people, that could be fun. 1:10:59.680 --> 1:11:02.839 I mean it's forty thousand people of this campus, college campus, 1:11:02.880 --> 1:11:03.880 So all. 1:11:03.840 --> 1:11:05.559 Right, maybe what's the comedy club there? 1:11:07.320 --> 1:11:10.640 There's a bunch. There's JJ's Live. But then there's the 1:11:10.640 --> 1:11:13.200 Walmart Empathy here, which is like the big outdoor venue 1:11:14.000 --> 1:11:15.559 where Bobby Lee played. 1:11:16.000 --> 1:11:18.320 I don't know if I draw to play the Walmart 1:11:18.320 --> 1:11:19.240 amphitheater man. 1:11:21.360 --> 1:11:24.280 Yeah, there's there's a JJ's Live is probably where you go. 1:11:24.400 --> 1:11:26.679 There's a bunch of them. There's these big, big clubs 1:11:26.720 --> 1:11:29.880 where bands come and comedy people come. 1:11:31.520 --> 1:11:36.280 I'll try if you work at JJ's Live hit me 1:11:36.360 --> 1:11:39.440 up on Instagram. 1:11:39.520 --> 1:11:41.439 All right, man, Well that's talking to you, dude. 1:11:41.600 --> 1:11:43.080 Let's talking to you too, Tonny. Is there anything else 1:11:43.120 --> 1:11:44.280 you want to say to the people of the computer 1:11:44.360 --> 1:11:44.840 before we go? 1:11:46.080 --> 1:11:47.800 Just keep listening to therapy that go as long as 1:11:47.800 --> 1:11:48.160 he doesn't. 1:11:49.240 --> 1:11:52.599 God fucking bless you, Tony. Keep keep keep being I'm glad. 1:11:52.640 --> 1:11:54.920 I'm glad that you didn't. I'm glad you did something 1:11:54.960 --> 1:11:56.920 with your life. I'm very happy about that. 1:11:57.280 --> 1:11:59.519 It's good that you're a doctor and you as well, sir, 1:11:59.760 --> 1:12:00.640 have get care man. 1:12:00.720 --> 1:12:05.040 Bye bye. Hello, Hey, Hey, what's your name? My name 1:12:05.080 --> 1:12:08.240 is Mike, Mike. What's up, Mike? How you doing? 1:12:09.439 --> 1:12:11.400 Oh no, I'm gonna at the gym at the moment, 1:12:11.479 --> 1:12:13.080 So I'm gonna taking a break right now. 1:12:13.880 --> 1:12:15.680 You're at the gym. What are we what are we 1:12:15.760 --> 1:12:18.439 working on? Is it a push day? A pull day? 1:12:19.880 --> 1:12:21.080 It's leg day? 1:12:22.120 --> 1:12:24.840 Leg Day? Respect for not skipping leg day. I'm a 1:12:24.840 --> 1:12:26.959 big leg day skipper. 1:12:28.280 --> 1:12:31.120 Oh no, yeah, you should not skip leg day at all. 1:12:34.040 --> 1:12:36.280 Just real quick. I'm not on like a headset or 1:12:36.280 --> 1:12:37.160 anything like that, right. 1:12:38.280 --> 1:12:41.040 No, I'm trying to find the quietest part in this gym, 1:12:41.080 --> 1:12:43.840 and it's just like I think I'm gonna go there. 1:12:43.880 --> 1:12:48.479 I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, Okay? How are you? How are 1:12:48.520 --> 1:12:49.759 your legs? How are your calves? 1:12:50.760 --> 1:12:54.479 Oh? I'm dying right now. I'm legit dying. 1:12:54.840 --> 1:12:56.120 Why are you legit dying? 1:12:57.880 --> 1:13:02.599 It kind of went a little hard on my lot today. Yeah, 1:13:03.120 --> 1:13:04.880 I did five forty on the squad. 1:13:06.080 --> 1:13:10.320 You did five five? I'm sorry you say five forty? Yeah, 1:13:11.320 --> 1:13:16.640 five hundred forty pounds? Yeah, So like, hold on, do 1:13:16.680 --> 1:13:21.120 you squat? Hold on? You squat five hundred and forty pounds? 1:13:21.680 --> 1:13:24.559 Yes, And like to give you like a picture of 1:13:24.600 --> 1:13:28.000 like what my body size is. I'm five eight and 1:13:28.200 --> 1:13:31.000 I'm less than one or forty five pounds at the moment. 1:13:32.920 --> 1:13:36.480 Bro, there's no way you squat five hundred and forty pounds. 1:13:36.640 --> 1:13:38.040 That's like how many of you? 1:13:40.080 --> 1:13:44.599 About three? I think I'm not good at maths? 1:13:45.920 --> 1:13:49.080 Is that even physical? Is that? Is that physically possible? 1:13:50.200 --> 1:13:53.560 It is? It is physically possible as long as you 1:13:53.600 --> 1:13:57.120 conditionally train your your muscle to do it, and then 1:13:57.160 --> 1:14:00.760 you always up your your level every time you you, uh, 1:14:01.120 --> 1:14:03.360 you work out that muscle, then you'll get stronger. 1:14:06.080 --> 1:14:08.599 Do you What do your calves look like? Are you ripped? 1:14:10.760 --> 1:14:13.200 I'm getting ripped. Yeah, yeah, but my legs look way 1:14:13.240 --> 1:14:16.000 better than my upper half body right now, so like 1:14:16.400 --> 1:14:18.960 I'm getting my my ass back again at the moment. 1:14:20.360 --> 1:14:22.400 Did There's no fucking way you you're lying to me. 1:14:22.439 --> 1:14:25.560 You do not squat five hundred and forty pounds. 1:14:26.400 --> 1:14:28.240 I'll see you a video later if you want. 1:14:29.680 --> 1:14:31.800 You know what, Yeah, actually, dude, send me a video 1:14:32.160 --> 1:14:34.800 of you squatting five hundred and forty pounds. Can you 1:14:34.840 --> 1:14:36.400 do it right now? Actually? 1:14:37.600 --> 1:14:40.519 Yeah? Okay, do you want me to go back to 1:14:40.560 --> 1:14:42.479 the leg part of it? I'll do it. 1:14:43.360 --> 1:14:44.559 What do you mean the leg part of it? 1:14:45.439 --> 1:14:47.320 No, because I'm at the core part of the gym 1:14:47.400 --> 1:14:50.360 right now, so I have to walk to the. 1:14:49.680 --> 1:14:51.839 Oh okay, Oh I thought you had a pre existing 1:14:51.960 --> 1:14:52.599 video of this. 1:14:53.760 --> 1:14:56.760 No, no, no, not yet, but I'll film one just 1:14:56.760 --> 1:14:57.520 for you. 1:14:57.520 --> 1:14:59.840 You squatted five hundred and forty pounds and you didn't 1:14:59.840 --> 1:15:01.759 even video it to show people. 1:15:02.840 --> 1:15:05.320 No, I'm not the show off kind of guy, though, 1:15:05.640 --> 1:15:08.360 I don't. I'm not like literally like three quarters of 1:15:08.479 --> 1:15:11.280 people here in the gym, or are they like take 1:15:11.360 --> 1:15:15.920 selfies in the gym, or like you know, if you 1:15:16.280 --> 1:15:17.839 kidnap that if. 1:15:17.680 --> 1:15:20.200 You can squat five hundred and forty pounds. You get 1:15:20.479 --> 1:15:22.240 to take a video of it and brag about it. 1:15:22.280 --> 1:15:24.960 You that you get to do that, you earned the 1:15:25.040 --> 1:15:28.040 ability to do that. Is this a one rep? Is this? 1:15:28.280 --> 1:15:30.120 Is this a one rep max? Or are you doing 1:15:30.200 --> 1:15:31.640 multiple ramps? 1:15:31.880 --> 1:15:37.679 I do? I do? Uh? Uh? Ten reps? Uh ten 1:15:38.880 --> 1:15:40.920 ten rap, ten raps. 1:15:40.400 --> 1:15:45.120 Three sets, ten reps, three sets of five hundred and 1:15:45.200 --> 1:15:46.680 forty pounds. You're fucking lying to me. 1:15:47.840 --> 1:15:50.200 No, I'm not. I promise. I think you promise. 1:15:52.760 --> 1:15:53.720 What do you what do you bent? 1:15:55.560 --> 1:15:55.680 Uh? 1:15:56.320 --> 1:15:58.320 I'm venturing at two fifty at the moment. 1:15:59.080 --> 1:16:02.800 Two fifty? Yeah, dude, what do you look like? 1:16:04.479 --> 1:16:05.639 I'm okay? 1:16:06.240 --> 1:16:06.719 Uh? 1:16:07.040 --> 1:16:09.040 Imagine Bruce Lee with long hair. 1:16:10.400 --> 1:16:12.759 You look like Bruce Lee with long hair. 1:16:13.520 --> 1:16:14.599 With really long hair. 1:16:14.680 --> 1:16:15.800 Yeah? 1:16:16.200 --> 1:16:16.799 Are you skary? 1:16:16.800 --> 1:16:16.840 Like? 1:16:16.880 --> 1:16:17.599 Are you skinny? 1:16:18.920 --> 1:16:21.200 Yeah? I'm slim fit. Yeah, I'm skinny. 1:16:22.120 --> 1:16:24.080 And how much did you say you weigh? 1:16:24.720 --> 1:16:26.599 I'm less than one hundred and forty five pounds at 1:16:26.640 --> 1:16:26.960 the moment. 1:16:27.200 --> 1:16:29.880 Shut the shut up, Shut the fuck up. You are less. 1:16:30.000 --> 1:16:32.080 Shut up, dude, you are lying to me. Why you 1:16:32.160 --> 1:16:34.840 like you learn less? You're less than one hundred and 1:16:34.880 --> 1:16:36.360 forty five pounds right now. 1:16:36.880 --> 1:16:40.160 I'm at five eight two five eight forty five pounds. 1:16:40.280 --> 1:16:43.240 Shut the fuck up. You do not bench two hundred 1:16:43.280 --> 1:16:46.200 and fifty pounds and squat five hundred pounds. 1:16:46.200 --> 1:16:48.719 I'll tak a video so you can be shocked for yourself. 1:16:50.280 --> 1:16:55.680 That's not even four. Like what, dude, You're fucking completely 1:16:55.760 --> 1:16:56.760 lying to me right now. 1:16:57.320 --> 1:16:59.360 I'm not. I'm not lying to you, Lyle. 1:17:01.840 --> 1:17:04.799 Not. How is that even physically possible? 1:17:05.960 --> 1:17:09.960 You just train? I've been training like since like last fall, 1:17:10.360 --> 1:17:14.080 I've been I've been uh sticking to my gym regiment 1:17:14.200 --> 1:17:20.680 since last fall, and I've gotten stronger since you've just 1:17:20.720 --> 1:17:23.640 seen me. Like last fall I was, I was like 1:17:23.720 --> 1:17:26.439 at one to fifty eight, and I somehow managed to 1:17:26.479 --> 1:17:31.960 lose weight during my journey of like uh working out 1:17:32.160 --> 1:17:33.360 like every time. 1:17:36.240 --> 1:17:39.320 Dude. Okay, yeah, I you know what. I don't even 1:17:39.400 --> 1:17:42.040 I was going to react to it on the podcast, 1:17:42.439 --> 1:17:44.800 But send me, send me these videos of you doing me. 1:17:44.920 --> 1:17:47.679 I just for my own personal I want to see 1:17:47.680 --> 1:17:51.439 you one hundred five eight one hundred and forty five 1:17:51.479 --> 1:17:56.519 pounds man squatting five hundred and forty pounds and benching 1:17:56.520 --> 1:18:00.120 two hundred fifty pounds looks like Cause I think, what 1:18:00.160 --> 1:18:06.960 do I bench, I bench like, let me check, I forget. 1:18:07.080 --> 1:18:09.280 There's no way. Do you take steroids? 1:18:09.880 --> 1:18:12.840 No? I don't. The most I do is uh is 1:18:12.920 --> 1:18:15.799 actually that energy drink that you drink Celsius? 1:18:15.920 --> 1:18:16.920 Oh celsius. 1:18:17.120 --> 1:18:17.320 Yeah? 1:18:17.400 --> 1:18:20.120 So now all right, how many how many celsiuses are 1:18:20.160 --> 1:18:23.519 you on? When you bench one hundred and whatever? Fucking put? 1:18:23.560 --> 1:18:24.519 When you bench one? 1:18:25.760 --> 1:18:26.479 I just do one? 1:18:27.520 --> 1:18:30.519 What do I bench? I'll bench like my max. I 1:18:31.000 --> 1:18:33.360 don't really like do the bench. I do like dumbbells. 1:18:33.560 --> 1:18:36.240 So my max with the dumbbells is like I'll do 1:18:36.360 --> 1:18:39.160 like two sixty pound dumbbells. That's like what one hundred 1:18:39.200 --> 1:18:40.480 and twenty pounds? 1:18:40.880 --> 1:18:44.360 Yeah, oh that's good. So do you do like max 1:18:44.439 --> 1:18:47.200 rap until you you equally can't do it and then 1:18:47.240 --> 1:18:48.840 you do another set and so you can't do. 1:18:48.880 --> 1:18:51.840 It again something like that. It depends if I'm like 1:18:51.960 --> 1:18:54.080 really into it, I'll like track all this shit. But 1:18:54.160 --> 1:18:55.880 lately it's just going to the gym has becomeing like 1:18:55.920 --> 1:18:58.040 more of a casual thing. 1:18:58.120 --> 1:18:58.439 I was. 1:18:58.520 --> 1:19:01.080 I was really I it was really good at like 1:19:01.200 --> 1:19:03.559 doing it like without fail three times a week, and 1:19:03.560 --> 1:19:05.360 then I got and then I and then I had 1:19:05.360 --> 1:19:08.760 an existential crisis and I wondered what the point was. 1:19:09.240 --> 1:19:11.160 But now I'm back sort of, not really. I don't 1:19:11.160 --> 1:19:11.400 know why I. 1:19:11.400 --> 1:19:17.040 Said, hey, hey Low, uh, just so you know that 1:19:17.280 --> 1:19:19.000 a lot of people care about you, so like we 1:19:19.360 --> 1:19:20.599 look out for you. 1:19:20.840 --> 1:19:22.760 Well, thank thank you man, thank you. I'm trying to 1:19:22.800 --> 1:19:24.800 look out for you. You're going to kill yourself if you 1:19:24.920 --> 1:19:25.559 keep doing this. 1:19:26.560 --> 1:19:28.240 No, no, I'm not going to kill myself. I know 1:19:28.320 --> 1:19:30.920 my limit. So it's like if my body notes went 1:19:30.960 --> 1:19:33.360 to quit, I'll quit. I'm not gonna like push myself 1:19:33.400 --> 1:19:36.880 until like I pop at mc l or at L 1:19:37.000 --> 1:19:40.400 or something like that. Yeah, I don't want to do that. 1:19:40.880 --> 1:19:49.120 Man. Yeah, what's your name again, Mike, Mike. 1:19:50.800 --> 1:19:54.559 Low. We've actually met, and we've actually met in the 1:19:54.600 --> 1:19:59.160 Salt Lake Show before your last salt show. Yes, I 1:19:59.160 --> 1:20:02.120 brought my girlfriend with me and she was she was 1:20:02.120 --> 1:20:05.519 the girl that mentioned about the chocolate covered cinnamon gummy bear. 1:20:05.720 --> 1:20:07.320 I don't know if you remember that, but yeah, we 1:20:07.320 --> 1:20:10.320 shook your hand with a pictures and you made our night. 1:20:10.840 --> 1:20:13.280 Oh, thank you, thank you. Oh that's really nice. That's 1:20:13.320 --> 1:20:16.080 really nice. And she mentioned the chocolate covered. 1:20:17.600 --> 1:20:18.519 Gummy gummy bear. 1:20:19.320 --> 1:20:21.559 You're not you're not eating that stuff. 1:20:22.520 --> 1:20:25.719 No, No, I'm in a strict diet right now. 1:20:25.880 --> 1:20:26.800 What do you eat? 1:20:27.840 --> 1:20:31.320 Uh? So, I've been really boring with my with my 1:20:31.400 --> 1:20:35.080 meal meals lately. I've been just doing, like I alternate 1:20:35.160 --> 1:20:37.920 between like beef and chicken every other day with rice 1:20:38.040 --> 1:20:38.720 and then that's it. 1:20:40.200 --> 1:20:44.240 How long you've been doing that since last fall and 1:20:44.280 --> 1:20:47.000 you're and you have no desire to eat something like 1:20:47.040 --> 1:20:50.120 a chocolate covered cinnamon gummy bear. Uh. 1:20:50.680 --> 1:20:53.560 I do it at least like on the weekend sparingly, 1:20:53.800 --> 1:20:56.360 but most of the time. Yeah, I tried. I tried 1:20:56.600 --> 1:20:58.880 try to fight it. Remember like that, have you seen 1:20:59.120 --> 1:21:04.360 the movie, uh, Dodgeball, where like Ben Stiller almost got 1:21:04.479 --> 1:21:06.960 that because like he was trying to pry his urge 1:21:07.000 --> 1:21:08.760 to like eat the drumpstick. 1:21:10.720 --> 1:21:11.320 Yeah, I'm like that. 1:21:11.360 --> 1:21:14.360 I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm like at that moment right now, 1:21:14.360 --> 1:21:17.559 but I'm yeah, my concentration is pretty good right now. 1:21:20.360 --> 1:21:22.599 Oh, help me solve this mystery. Okay, help me solve 1:21:22.640 --> 1:21:28.200 this mystery. I go to the Blink Fitness, and at 1:21:28.240 --> 1:21:33.879 the Blink Fitness they have for sale like these sour 1:21:34.439 --> 1:21:40.080 rainbow belts. Yeah, and I thought first I was looking 1:21:40.120 --> 1:21:41.280 at them, and I was like, are these like this 1:21:41.320 --> 1:21:44.400 is like protein candy, and it's not. It's just regular 1:21:44.439 --> 1:21:50.960 ass sour belts. Is there any reason whatsoever from a 1:21:51.000 --> 1:21:53.759 fitness perspective why you would want to eat that before 1:21:53.760 --> 1:21:56.760 working out? 1:21:57.240 --> 1:22:01.240 So I would not recommend you eating though us. I 1:22:01.439 --> 1:22:05.479 just do like the energy bars, any energy bars that's 1:22:05.520 --> 1:22:08.720 like a little over like twenty grams of protein, and 1:22:08.760 --> 1:22:12.599 then I would I would just eat that before the thing, yeah, 1:22:12.640 --> 1:22:14.679 because like yeah, yeah. 1:22:14.720 --> 1:22:21.200 The the question is is is is there a reason 1:22:21.280 --> 1:22:24.439 why they sell that other than for people who have 1:22:24.520 --> 1:22:26.560 given up on their way out of there? 1:22:26.760 --> 1:22:30.599 It's pure marketing. I think it's just like, oh look, 1:22:30.720 --> 1:22:33.120 oh you're at a gym. Oh look what else we're 1:22:33.160 --> 1:22:36.880 selling here? Because like they're selling like other like uh 1:22:37.240 --> 1:22:40.599 like weird stuff that you shouldn't be eating too. Yeah, 1:22:40.600 --> 1:22:45.160 because just like the gym that you just stated, Yeah, 1:22:45.280 --> 1:22:47.960 I have a membership at that particular gym too, and 1:22:48.080 --> 1:22:49.240 yeah they do that ship too. 1:22:49.520 --> 1:22:53.080 What's your take on bear Bell's protein bars. 1:22:53.640 --> 1:22:55.920 I actually love it. I highly recommend it. 1:22:56.479 --> 1:23:00.080 Yeah, they're awesome there, like, but here's my problem. I 1:23:00.080 --> 1:23:02.000 eat I think I Yeah, I eat one for breakfast 1:23:02.040 --> 1:23:05.599 every morning. I eat a Barebells protein bar that's that's good. 1:23:05.640 --> 1:23:06.920 That's good. That's good. 1:23:07.439 --> 1:23:08.519 Yes, yes, it's good. 1:23:08.560 --> 1:23:12.040 But because I'm because because I'm eating it, and I'm like, 1:23:12.320 --> 1:23:15.760 this tastes like a candy bar. I'm I think I've 1:23:15.760 --> 1:23:18.280 convinced myself that eating a candy bar for breakfast every 1:23:18.280 --> 1:23:20.200 morning is somehow not unhealthy. 1:23:20.560 --> 1:23:23.400 Like there's got to be a cat no, no, uh, 1:23:23.479 --> 1:23:26.360 it's no. U. Just like if you just stick to 1:23:26.560 --> 1:23:29.200 like what you're doing right now, or you intermittently go 1:23:29.280 --> 1:23:30.880 to the gym when you feel like it, and then 1:23:31.200 --> 1:23:32.880 you're still eating that in the morning, Yeah, I think 1:23:32.920 --> 1:23:36.320 you'll still be fine. But like from like the sound 1:23:36.400 --> 1:23:40.240 of like your previous episodes, you're just physically active every day. 1:23:40.479 --> 1:23:42.000 I think you'll Yeah, you'll be fine. 1:23:44.560 --> 1:23:46.200 I don't know why I'm listening to you. You're lying 1:23:46.240 --> 1:23:48.080 to me about fucking benching. 1:23:48.960 --> 1:23:49.400 You're lying. 1:23:49.960 --> 1:23:53.519 I'm not You're gonna get You're gonna get your video tomorrow. 1:23:55.720 --> 1:23:59.920 What's your name again, Mike? Mike? I like you, my 1:24:00.080 --> 1:24:00.479 You're cool. 1:24:00.520 --> 1:24:02.800 Yeah, you're cool. Guys. 1:24:04.240 --> 1:24:06.720 Everyone I talked to on the podcast today was was 1:24:06.880 --> 1:24:07.920 I enjoyed talking to? 1:24:09.240 --> 1:24:13.519 Yeah? Yeah, I agree, especially that that lady that you 1:24:13.600 --> 1:24:15.599 talked in the first half of this episode. Yeah, I 1:24:15.600 --> 1:24:17.520 sortally enjoyed that part of the episode. 1:24:17.840 --> 1:24:23.439 Yeah, she was cool. What else? What else? We got it? 1:24:23.520 --> 1:24:26.599 Let's we can keep going for however long we want. 1:24:26.720 --> 1:24:32.120 There's no thing, there's no yeah, go ahead, go ahead? 1:24:32.160 --> 1:24:36.599 Okay, So, uh what else? Oh and then there's another 1:24:36.600 --> 1:24:41.720 thing I want to talk about? Okay? Yeah, so, uh 1:24:43.360 --> 1:24:47.800 so my act still pays for my uh my subscription 1:24:48.000 --> 1:24:52.439 on like premium channels like Max and Paramount, And I 1:24:52.479 --> 1:24:54.479 still don't have the heart to like tell her that 1:24:55.080 --> 1:24:58.000 I'm still using those accounts that she paid for. 1:25:01.479 --> 1:25:03.360 I'm gonna go ahead, and I'm gonna label that as 1:25:03.400 --> 1:25:04.479 a victimless crime. 1:25:05.800 --> 1:25:09.040 Oh really, well I love that. 1:25:09.479 --> 1:25:13.479 Well, look, dude, I mean it's not it doesn't take away. 1:25:14.040 --> 1:25:17.120 It's not like she it's not like she. Are you 1:25:17.200 --> 1:25:19.280 at like the max amount of accounts that can be 1:25:19.320 --> 1:25:20.160 added to the thing? 1:25:21.600 --> 1:25:22.400 Uh yes? 1:25:23.360 --> 1:25:24.439 Oh really yeah? 1:25:24.479 --> 1:25:27.120 Like yeah, like my name is still on the account 1:25:27.280 --> 1:25:30.200 like for this said use their name for all like 1:25:30.520 --> 1:25:34.800 the Prime Video, the Paramount plus match Netflix. 1:25:35.720 --> 1:25:38.920 Yeah, damn, her new her new guy is gonna be 1:25:38.960 --> 1:25:39.640 like who the fuck is. 1:25:39.680 --> 1:25:42.360 Matt right exactly? 1:25:42.840 --> 1:25:46.479 What's your what's your icon on it? Uh? 1:25:46.560 --> 1:25:49.920 An alien like for one of them, and then like 1:25:50.000 --> 1:25:53.600 I have the main guy from the Last of Us 1:25:53.680 --> 1:25:57.559 from like Max, and like I have a random puppy 1:25:57.560 --> 1:25:58.400 for my paramount. 1:25:59.320 --> 1:26:01.479 I'm gonna, I think gets I think. You know what, Look, 1:26:01.520 --> 1:26:03.559 here's the thing. If you want to be Jesus Christ, 1:26:03.800 --> 1:26:07.000 right and some some people, uh, if you want to 1:26:07.040 --> 1:26:11.840 be the like like Ned Flanders, like I commit. You know, 1:26:11.880 --> 1:26:17.080 if you want to be a man of like complete, utter, unflinching, 1:26:17.439 --> 1:26:23.880 one hundred percent nobility, then yeah, then you could take 1:26:23.920 --> 1:26:30.360 yourself off of the HBO Max subscription. But yeah, you know, 1:26:30.479 --> 1:26:32.160 I I don't know if you're got nobody gets to 1:26:32.200 --> 1:26:34.200 one hundred percent. If you're if you were gutting for 1:26:34.240 --> 1:26:38.639 one hundred percent no noble Jesus Christ, run of life, 1:26:39.360 --> 1:26:41.600 then you would take you would take it off. But 1:26:42.120 --> 1:26:43.880 nobody gets nobody does a hundred. 1:26:43.840 --> 1:26:47.639 So yeah, yeah, no, it's it's it's kind of yeah, 1:26:47.720 --> 1:26:51.120 because like every now and then, like uh, I would 1:26:51.160 --> 1:26:55.840 like switch user names on these asset apps, and I 1:26:55.880 --> 1:26:58.799 would and I would notice like someone's been like watching 1:26:58.840 --> 1:27:01.160 like different stuff and I on my part of the 1:27:01.360 --> 1:27:03.400 channel too. I was like that's weird. I was like, 1:27:03.720 --> 1:27:07.679 I haven't seen h Gilmore girls in a long time. 1:27:07.720 --> 1:27:09.120 I was like, I've never seen that shawe. 1:27:09.160 --> 1:27:10.040 I was like, what the heck? 1:27:10.800 --> 1:27:12.559 I was like, why are they watching it on my account? 1:27:15.640 --> 1:27:15.840 Yeah? 1:27:15.840 --> 1:27:17.960 And then the weird part is like we split up 1:27:18.000 --> 1:27:20.439 like almost two and a half years ago. 1:27:22.160 --> 1:27:26.000 Oh oh oh it's been two and a half years. Yeah, 1:27:26.040 --> 1:27:29.200 well yeah, let her let her kick you off? 1:27:30.920 --> 1:27:32.800 Oh yeah, who who? 1:27:33.600 --> 1:27:36.679 Who broke it off? She did? 1:27:38.160 --> 1:27:38.639 She did? 1:27:38.920 --> 1:27:41.640 Is that part of what inspired you to train to 1:27:42.840 --> 1:27:47.960 uh squat four of you? 1:27:48.040 --> 1:27:51.640 Actually? Yeah, I just yeah, I was like not in 1:27:51.720 --> 1:27:56.280 a good shape when we broke up, and then now 1:27:57.160 --> 1:28:00.600 I'm in a better shape, Like I feel I like 1:28:01.800 --> 1:28:04.559 this version of me versus the version of me two 1:28:04.600 --> 1:28:05.479 and a half years ago. 1:28:08.640 --> 1:28:11.080 Wait, so was that was that? This is not the 1:28:11.120 --> 1:28:12.960 same woman that I met in Salt Lake City? 1:28:13.880 --> 1:28:15.639 No, No, that was my new girlfriend? 1:28:15.960 --> 1:28:20.519 Okay, okay, well yeah your ex girlfriend? Fucking she definitely 1:28:21.840 --> 1:28:24.920 she definitely sold low on that shack. 1:28:26.280 --> 1:28:31.080 Oh definitely. Yeah. Yeah. And then yeah she's still Yeah, 1:28:31.080 --> 1:28:33.880 she's still working a pretty bad job. So I'm kind 1:28:33.880 --> 1:28:36.800 of happy that I'm in a better place now than 1:28:37.680 --> 1:28:38.320 she is now. 1:28:39.200 --> 1:28:41.600 I don't believe you at all. I don't believe for 1:28:41.640 --> 1:28:43.320 a second. Then you know I don't, and you know 1:28:43.320 --> 1:28:47.000 what the thing is. I guess, Yeah, next, I guess 1:28:47.040 --> 1:28:50.479 on the next podcast. I'll have to mention at some 1:28:50.640 --> 1:28:55.080 point whether or not because I'm expecting you to send 1:28:55.080 --> 1:28:56.160 me these videos. 1:28:56.800 --> 1:28:58.080 Yeah, you're getting one tomorrow. 1:28:59.080 --> 1:29:03.519 Okay, all right, I mean I don't I yeah, okay, 1:29:03.560 --> 1:29:08.440 I'll try to remember to check the phone line. 1:29:08.600 --> 1:29:10.280 Yeah, I'll send it to your Instagram page. 1:29:10.800 --> 1:29:12.599 Okay, yeah, do that, I check that more. 1:29:12.720 --> 1:29:20.480 Okay, Yeah, I'll do that, all right, Matt. 1:29:20.360 --> 1:29:21.439 Is there anything else you want to say to the 1:29:21.479 --> 1:29:22.519 people of the computer before we go? 1:29:24.160 --> 1:29:26.920 Uh, pigeons aren't real. 1:29:27.560 --> 1:29:29.599 You're telling me I can eat a bare Bells protein 1:29:29.680 --> 1:29:32.240 bar and drink of Celsius every day for the rest 1:29:32.240 --> 1:29:34.160 of my life and it's not unhealthy. 1:29:35.520 --> 1:29:36.800 Yes, that's track. 1:29:39.200 --> 1:29:43.599 Please let me look you go ahead, go ahead, you look. 1:29:43.960 --> 1:29:46.240 You look better now than you did when I first 1:29:46.280 --> 1:29:49.519 started watching you. So well, you're doing something good in 1:29:49.560 --> 1:29:49.920 your life. 1:29:50.120 --> 1:29:53.320 Well hold on, Well, I I lost weight and I'm 1:29:53.320 --> 1:29:56.080 continuing to lose well, I'm I'm I fell off a 1:29:56.120 --> 1:29:57.800 lot of my habits, but I did lose weight. But 1:29:58.920 --> 1:30:02.280 even though I lost weight, I don't know if that's 1:30:02.360 --> 1:30:05.479 I don't know if losing weight is the same as 1:30:06.280 --> 1:30:11.000 being healthy because you can eat only twinkies for a 1:30:11.160 --> 1:30:13.040 month and you will lose weight. 1:30:15.120 --> 1:30:20.759 Yeah, no, there's there's so So the thing with weight 1:30:20.840 --> 1:30:24.280 loss is just like it's literally what you do on 1:30:24.360 --> 1:30:30.200 top of it. It's what's very beneficial for you. Like 1:30:30.320 --> 1:30:32.960 even if you don't think you you don't feel like 1:30:33.280 --> 1:30:37.360 you're progressing in your in your physical house right now, 1:30:37.840 --> 1:30:41.560 but like if everyone can notice that you like physically 1:30:41.640 --> 1:30:45.040 changed and you're doing something good about your your physical 1:30:45.040 --> 1:30:46.080 workout right now. 1:30:48.200 --> 1:30:51.080 I'm gonna I'm gonna only eat cosmic brownies for a month. 1:30:51.479 --> 1:30:53.320 Those are so you know how many fuck guess many 1:30:53.320 --> 1:30:55.080 fucking calories is in a cosmic brownie? 1:30:55.120 --> 1:30:55.439 Dude? 1:30:56.840 --> 1:30:59.599 Uh isn't it like uh like fifteen hundred? 1:31:00.040 --> 1:31:03.400 It's like five fifteen hundred. That's crazy? Is what is 1:31:03.479 --> 1:31:06.320 up with you and your numbers? You have aut landish? 1:31:06.320 --> 1:31:10.000 No, no, no, I just my my brain is full 1:31:10.040 --> 1:31:15.240 of like useless sacks. So it's just like it's yeah, yeah, 1:31:15.439 --> 1:31:18.280 I'm crazy like that with numbers. 1:31:17.479 --> 1:31:20.920 Five hundred and ten, Dude. Five isn't that fucking bullshit? 1:31:21.640 --> 1:31:25.880 Five hundred and ten calories for a for for for 1:31:26.560 --> 1:31:30.040 you know, ten seconds of joy? 1:31:30.479 --> 1:31:34.479 Man, you eat it that quick? That's crazy. 1:31:34.720 --> 1:31:37.320 I've never tied myself. But all right, I'll tell you what. 1:31:37.439 --> 1:31:40.120 You send me a picture of you doing a five 1:31:40.200 --> 1:31:42.000 hundred and forty pounds squat in a two hundred and 1:31:42.040 --> 1:31:43.720 fifty pound bench, and I'll send you a video of 1:31:43.800 --> 1:31:51.160 me eating a five hundred and ten calorie cosmic brownie. Deal, Matt, 1:31:51.240 --> 1:31:52.240 is there anything else you want to say to the 1:31:52.240 --> 1:31:53.360 people the computer before we go? 1:31:56.640 --> 1:32:01.960 Be kind? H justick care of yourself and I'm glad 1:32:01.960 --> 1:32:03.280 you're doing better now. 1:32:05.000 --> 1:32:08.880 Thank you, man, Good luck, God bless you your beautiful soul. 1:32:09.800 --> 1:32:12.639 I'm around this. I'll see you around the universe. God, 1:32:12.760 --> 1:32:16.880 good there's I'm you. Hold on, I'm gonna keep you. Okay. 1:32:18.360 --> 1:32:21.120 First of all, First of all, first of all, I 1:32:21.160 --> 1:32:23.280 didn't mean. First of all, whenever I say God bless 1:32:23.280 --> 1:32:28.479 you to someone, I don't mean like the Christian God. Okay, 1:32:29.720 --> 1:32:32.920 even if I did, that's an asshole thing to say 1:32:33.160 --> 1:32:36.040 to someone when they say God bless you. It's an 1:32:36.120 --> 1:32:39.320 asshole thing to say to someone when they say God 1:32:39.360 --> 1:32:42.800 bless you. I don't believe it because when someone says God, 1:32:42.840 --> 1:32:45.280 bless you. They're trying to be nice, They're trying to 1:32:45.320 --> 1:32:47.160 they just they really just mean have a good day. 1:32:47.240 --> 1:32:49.320 And then when you say I don't believe in God, 1:32:50.000 --> 1:32:52.760 you kind of be an asshole. But I also I 1:32:52.760 --> 1:32:56.000 don't really, I don't mean, I don't know. I don't 1:32:56.320 --> 1:32:58.080 I don't believe in God. I don't believe in like 1:32:58.160 --> 1:33:01.080 Christian God either. I believe in like higher power ship. 1:33:01.479 --> 1:33:04.800 I think you can mar yeah, yeah, but like that's 1:33:04.840 --> 1:33:08.680 what God. Yeah, but but but that's what God means, 1:33:09.280 --> 1:33:11.760 you know, it just means higher power. It doesn't necessarily 1:33:11.760 --> 1:33:14.760 mean like the God that you grew up with when 1:33:14.760 --> 1:33:17.920 you were going to church and ship. You know. Yeah, 1:33:18.320 --> 1:33:22.960 so what so may the higher may, whatever controls the 1:33:23.000 --> 1:33:27.880 flow of the universe be that, even not a higher power, 1:33:27.920 --> 1:33:30.960 be that even you. May whatever that force is, even 1:33:30.960 --> 1:33:32.960 if that force is literally you and your brain and 1:33:33.000 --> 1:33:38.840 your actions, you being God, May God bless you, May 1:33:38.920 --> 1:33:41.000 you bless you? You know what I mean? 1:33:42.120 --> 1:33:44.040 Well, is this what it feels like being blessed by 1:33:44.040 --> 1:33:49.719 the gekker right now? Do you believe I do believe 1:33:49.760 --> 1:33:50.160 in the Gecko? 1:33:53.640 --> 1:33:57.120 I just that because I've been saying God bless you 1:33:57.160 --> 1:33:59.640 to people, and I don't know why, but that's what 1:33:59.680 --> 1:34:02.160 I mean when I say it, I think when it 1:34:02.160 --> 1:34:02.720 comes out of my. 1:34:03.320 --> 1:34:05.479 Ask you about that. I've always wanted to ask you 1:34:05.520 --> 1:34:07.920 about that. It's just like, I don't know if he's 1:34:08.000 --> 1:34:10.880 like real because I know you're Jewish. So it's just like. 1:34:11.640 --> 1:34:15.960 I grew up I culturally, I grew up culturally Jewish, 1:34:15.960 --> 1:34:18.720 but I don't like, I don't like, I don't know 1:34:18.720 --> 1:34:20.720 what the toll rest. I don't even think, but I 1:34:20.760 --> 1:34:25.440 don't think most Jews know what like it doesn't Judaism 1:34:25.479 --> 1:34:30.880 has no effect on my spiritual views of life in 1:34:30.920 --> 1:34:34.000 the universe. It's just you know, I like, I like 1:34:34.880 --> 1:34:35.679 eating matza. 1:34:38.120 --> 1:34:39.679 I haven't had matsa in a long time. 1:34:41.560 --> 1:34:45.000 But no, I don't mean like a Christian. I don't 1:34:45.000 --> 1:34:47.120 mean like a Christian. I don't mean like a Christian 1:34:47.720 --> 1:34:51.640 made Jesus Christ as we understand that to be. You know, 1:34:51.800 --> 1:34:57.679 it just means, you know, whatever I guess I explained it. Well, 1:34:57.720 --> 1:35:00.000 it's just a higher power. That's not even when I 1:35:00.120 --> 1:35:01.639 you know what, you know what it really is. Actually 1:35:01.680 --> 1:35:03.519 it's not even any of that stuff. It's just you 1:35:03.560 --> 1:35:08.720 know what it really is. I just needed something to say. Oh, 1:35:08.760 --> 1:35:11.080 that's what it really is. It just means by it 1:35:11.360 --> 1:35:14.960 just it just makes It's just words. It means nothing. 1:35:15.120 --> 1:35:16.960 It doesn't even mean any of the stuff I said 1:35:17.000 --> 1:35:21.559 about you being God. It's just saying more words because 1:35:22.680 --> 1:35:25.240 we're in a conversation, and when you're in a conversation, 1:35:25.320 --> 1:35:27.880 you have to say words for there to be a conversation. 1:35:28.280 --> 1:35:30.040 That's what it means when I say cared bless you. 1:35:31.040 --> 1:35:32.800 So yeah, if you put down a T shirt, I'd 1:35:32.840 --> 1:35:33.559 totally buy it. 1:35:34.640 --> 1:35:37.720 Matt God bless you. Send me that video of you 1:35:38.720 --> 1:35:43.920 lifting one hundred and whatever pounds and I may never 1:35:44.000 --> 1:35:46.439 talk to you ever again. But if that is the case, 1:35:46.479 --> 1:35:48.599 I enjoyed the period of time that we did get 1:35:48.600 --> 1:35:48.960 to talk. 1:35:50.120 --> 1:35:55.920 I I I concur have a good name Matte that. 1:35:56.200 --> 1:35:58.280 I liked Matt, that was cool. I liked everyone we 1:35:58.320 --> 1:36:02.280 talked to today. What a great episode of the podcast. 1:36:02.920 --> 1:36:04.640 Thank you to everyone who listens to this. This is 1:36:04.640 --> 1:36:08.160 a fun episode of the podcast. Sometimes sometimes we just 1:36:08.200 --> 1:36:10.599 do an episode and I'm like, wow, I felt great. 1:36:11.640 --> 1:36:14.639 The correlation is always it's always about how much caffeine 1:36:14.640 --> 1:36:19.200 I induce I ingested before recording. It makes me feel 1:36:19.240 --> 1:36:24.240 like myself, like chemically. I know it's not. It feels 1:36:24.280 --> 1:36:27.320 weird to like need a substance to be yourself, but 1:36:27.400 --> 1:36:32.280 I really do feel like myself. I felt I loved 1:36:32.360 --> 1:36:35.840 the version of myself that I was for the entire 1:36:35.960 --> 1:36:40.200 duration of this episode. And the reason for that is 1:36:40.240 --> 1:36:42.960 because I drank a diet Mountain Dew, which has ninety 1:36:43.000 --> 1:36:46.800 one milligrams of caffeine. I could keep talking. Sometimes by 1:36:46.800 --> 1:36:49.760 the end of doing this, like I'm exhausted and I 1:36:49.880 --> 1:36:52.400 lie on the floor. But today I'm like, I could 1:36:52.479 --> 1:36:59.320 just keep talking. I feel good. This was nice. I'm 1:36:59.320 --> 1:37:01.639 gonna cut my line. I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I'm gonna 1:37:01.680 --> 1:37:04.040 quit while we're hot. Thank you for listening to the 1:37:04.040 --> 1:37:08.120 Therapy Echo podcast. I really mean it. I'm honored. Thanks 1:37:08.200 --> 1:37:11.880 for sitting through the ads or skipping through them. Thanks 1:37:11.880 --> 1:37:18.640 for dealing with it, Thanks for listening, Thanks for commenting. 1:37:18.680 --> 1:37:20.800 If you comment, I read all the Spotify and the 1:37:20.800 --> 1:37:26.519 YouTube comments because I'm crazy. This was nice, this was good. 1:37:26.560 --> 1:37:30.080 I enjoyed doing this. This was this was this was 1:37:30.160 --> 1:37:35.120 this felt fun to do, and I felt honored to 1:37:35.120 --> 1:37:38.200 be able to do it today. So thank you for listening. 1:37:39.080 --> 1:37:41.519 I'm gonna go calm down. I need to calm down. 1:37:41.520 --> 1:37:46.719 I'm gonna go calm down. God bless you. I guess 1:37:46.720 --> 1:37:49.599 whatever the fuck I mean when I say that, I'm glad. 1:37:49.600 --> 1:37:53.960 I got to clear that up. And uh, I'm gonna 1:37:53.960 --> 1:37:56.120 go eat something. I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go eat 1:37:56.120 --> 1:38:00.240 a fucking sandwich and watch TV and feel honored. I'm 1:38:00.280 --> 1:38:02.960 gonna go eat a sandwich and watch a YouTube video 1:38:04.240 --> 1:38:08.960 about Luigi and about like ten Luigi facts or whatever 1:38:09.040 --> 1:38:11.760 the fuck, and I'm gonna feel honored that I get 1:38:11.800 --> 1:38:20.360 to live today to do that, all right. Gecko out 1:38:20.360 --> 1:38:23.519 goes on the line taking your phone calls every night. 1:38:23.920 --> 1:38:25.840 Never Beacon goes to his ride. 1:38:25.920 --> 1:38:26.600 He's teaching you 1:38:26.600 --> 1:38:29.120 A loud in them of your life, but he's not 1:38:29.240 --> 1:38:30.640 really an expert.