WEBVTT - The Legacy You Leave: Becoming the Influence Someone Needs 0:00:00.880 --> 0:00:03.560 This is Bold Steps with Mark Jobe. I'm Wayne Shepherd, 0:00:03.560 --> 0:00:06.920 and today we're discussing something that could transform our family. 0:00:07.160 --> 0:00:10.080 Not just now, but for generations to come. Mark. 0:00:10.119 --> 0:00:13.560 Yeah. You know, Wayne, we're discussing legacy. And there's some 0:00:13.560 --> 0:00:16.200 people that are listening that have a great legacy that 0:00:16.200 --> 0:00:19.000 they need to repeat. And there's some people that are 0:00:19.000 --> 0:00:22.239 listening that need to break the cycle of the legacy 0:00:22.239 --> 0:00:26.599 they've inherited. I've thought a lot about this over the years. 0:00:26.800 --> 0:00:31.200 Being a pastor in Chicago. So many of the men, 0:00:31.200 --> 0:00:34.320 especially that I was meeting, I realized that as I 0:00:34.320 --> 0:00:37.080 talked to them, part of their challenge was to break 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:40.400 the cycle that had been given to them cycles of addiction, 0:00:40.400 --> 0:00:46.080 cycles of violence, cycles of divorce and fidelity. And it 0:00:46.080 --> 0:00:49.920 started to become a real burden for me to realize, hey, 0:00:49.960 --> 0:00:56.880 I was given a legacy from some parents that broke cycles. And, um, 0:00:56.920 --> 0:01:00.320 it gave me a greater start. And I started to 0:01:00.320 --> 0:01:04.240 realize that there's a first generation that has to break 0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:08.600 cycles so that their children and their grandchildren don't repeat 0:01:08.600 --> 0:01:09.360 those cycles. 0:01:09.400 --> 0:01:12.319 Well, let's have this conversation today about influence and about 0:01:12.319 --> 0:01:15.720 investment and that lasting impact we can make. It's coming 0:01:15.720 --> 0:01:32.400 up today on bold Steps. Welcome to a special Bold 0:01:32.400 --> 0:01:35.160 Steps with Mark Jobe. Mark is senior pastor of New 0:01:35.160 --> 0:01:39.120 Life Community Church and president of Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. Mark, 0:01:39.160 --> 0:01:41.399 you recently took a meaningful trip back to Spain, where 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:44.800 you spent your childhood. Let's talk about, uh, new lessons 0:01:44.840 --> 0:01:47.760 learned going back to a to a former place of 0:01:48.080 --> 0:01:49.400 of residence there, huh? 0:01:49.600 --> 0:01:51.880 Yeah. So some of the listeners know, but I grew 0:01:51.880 --> 0:01:54.680 up in the country of Spain. Went there when I 0:01:54.680 --> 0:01:57.440 was six years old. Left the US when I was 0:01:57.440 --> 0:02:00.680 six months old. You know, every time I go to Spain, 0:02:00.680 --> 0:02:03.930 when my children were small. I would love to take 0:02:03.930 --> 0:02:08.410 them to this little cemetery outside the city of Burgos. 0:02:09.410 --> 0:02:14.530 There's a very simple grave there. Engraved on the top 0:02:14.530 --> 0:02:21.330 of that gravesite are the words para el morir is Ganesha, 0:02:21.610 --> 0:02:24.369 which in English is for me to live is Christ, 0:02:24.530 --> 0:02:28.410 and to die is gain. Beautiful. And, uh, my father 0:02:28.570 --> 0:02:31.410 was buried. He died at 60 years old. He's buried 0:02:31.410 --> 0:02:34.850 in that grave. And I would bring my children there 0:02:34.850 --> 0:02:39.010 because I would want them to understand the power of legacy. 0:02:39.970 --> 0:02:43.889 And legacy is that which we inherit and that which 0:02:43.889 --> 0:02:47.890 we pass down. We all have a legacy. We're all 0:02:47.889 --> 0:02:52.290 deeply affected by our legacy and the cycles that are 0:02:52.290 --> 0:02:55.929 ahead of us. Those do not determine our future, but 0:02:55.930 --> 0:02:59.850 they explain some of our battles in the present. My 0:02:59.850 --> 0:03:07.770 parents Fortunately, they were first generation cycle breakers. My mother's 0:03:07.770 --> 0:03:10.450 father was an alcoholic. They would have to drag him 0:03:10.450 --> 0:03:14.530 out of the bars that he was fighting in. My 0:03:14.610 --> 0:03:20.770 father's parents were believers, but, um, you know, they later 0:03:20.770 --> 0:03:23.210 on in life got more grounded. And so both of 0:03:23.210 --> 0:03:27.730 my parents, uh, were not believers into their teenage years 0:03:28.210 --> 0:03:32.490 and had to come to Christ and really break some cycles. 0:03:32.889 --> 0:03:35.690 And I feel like growing up in their household, they 0:03:35.690 --> 0:03:38.810 had broken cycles that I didn't have to break. So 0:03:38.810 --> 0:03:43.490 I've been beneficiary of those beautiful cycles. But there are 0:03:43.490 --> 0:03:45.250 many of the people that I work with. They are 0:03:45.250 --> 0:03:48.850 the first generation of cycle breakers and the battle is 0:03:48.850 --> 0:03:49.810 more intense. 0:03:49.930 --> 0:03:52.050 So they were not just your parents, they were your 0:03:52.050 --> 0:03:54.530 spiritual mentors as well, weren't they? 0:03:54.570 --> 0:03:59.090 Yeah. That's right. Deeply influenced by that. My mother, she's 0:03:59.130 --> 0:04:04.500 almost 88 years old and just has a very vibrant, 0:04:04.500 --> 0:04:08.300 positive faith, reads five chapters of the Bible every day, 0:04:08.700 --> 0:04:13.300 spends probably a couple hours in prayer every day she walks. 0:04:13.300 --> 0:04:16.260 She's very engaged in the church, even though she's lost 0:04:16.260 --> 0:04:20.060 most of her eyesight. And, you know, she's just passed 0:04:20.060 --> 0:04:23.660 down this incredible legacy. As I look back of someone 0:04:23.660 --> 0:04:28.100 that just has a super positive attitude, loves Jesus, cares 0:04:28.100 --> 0:04:32.940 about people. Those have splashed down to myself and my siblings, 0:04:33.180 --> 0:04:35.339 and I realize that those are some of the cycles 0:04:35.339 --> 0:04:36.500 that we want to carry on. 0:04:36.540 --> 0:04:39.580 Yeah, indeed. The power of mentoring. We'll talk more about 0:04:39.580 --> 0:04:42.300 this and later, Doctor Chris Ragazzini will join us as 0:04:42.300 --> 0:04:44.979 well in this special edition of Bold Steps. But I'm 0:04:44.980 --> 0:04:48.100 just thinking of Second Timothy in the relationship between Paul 0:04:48.100 --> 0:04:49.900 and Timothy. That has to come to mind when you 0:04:49.940 --> 0:04:51.180 think of spiritual mentoring. 0:04:51.540 --> 0:04:56.099 Yeah. You know, the apostle Paul took on a young 0:04:56.100 --> 0:04:59.900 man who most scholars believe his father was not a 0:04:59.900 --> 0:05:03.940 believer because Paul speaks about the faith of his grandmother 0:05:03.940 --> 0:05:08.340 and his mother. Paul's father was a Gentile. His mother 0:05:08.339 --> 0:05:11.580 was Jewish, which was a forbidden marriage to begin with. 0:05:12.220 --> 0:05:16.860 Probably not supportive of his faith, probably wondering what he 0:05:16.860 --> 0:05:20.580 was doing with his life. Uh, Timothy seems to struggle 0:05:20.580 --> 0:05:27.300 with insecurity. Confidence. The ability to confront. He's got physical ailments, 0:05:27.300 --> 0:05:30.500 but Paul takes him under his wing. And I think 0:05:30.500 --> 0:05:34.300 Paul sees in him something that maybe Timothy didn't see 0:05:34.300 --> 0:05:38.460 in himself. And Scripture doesn't tell us this, but it 0:05:38.460 --> 0:05:44.180 seems implied that, um, probably Timothy's father was not this 0:05:44.180 --> 0:05:48.500 presence that really had an influence on Timothy. And the 0:05:48.500 --> 0:05:53.180 apostle Paul is a surrogate father that is speaking into 0:05:53.220 --> 0:05:56.620 his life, I think, breaking cycles and building up the 0:05:56.620 --> 0:05:59.020 sense of calling that Timothy really needed. 0:05:59.180 --> 0:06:02.229 Well, you've preached on this passage from Second Timothy. And 0:06:02.230 --> 0:06:04.109 let's listen to that. And later we'll bring in Doctor 0:06:04.110 --> 0:06:07.029 Chris Rappaccini to talk about it as well. Here's Mark Jobe. 0:06:08.390 --> 0:06:10.229 Look up at me, men, if you're a father here, 0:06:10.230 --> 0:06:12.430 raise your hand if you're a father in this place. Okay? 0:06:12.430 --> 0:06:15.110 We have a lot of fathers. I want to speak 0:06:15.110 --> 0:06:18.270 into your life right now, men. And it doesn't matter 0:06:18.270 --> 0:06:21.470 whether your son or daughter is 30 or 40 years old, 0:06:21.470 --> 0:06:23.909 or whether they're two and five years old. I want 0:06:23.950 --> 0:06:29.550 to say this to you. Never miss the opportunity to 0:06:29.589 --> 0:06:34.270 speak into the life and destiny of your son or daughter. 0:06:35.870 --> 0:06:43.070 Never miss that opportunity. Do you know how many men 0:06:43.070 --> 0:06:48.270 and women that I have talked to? Oftentimes balling their eyes, 0:06:49.390 --> 0:06:54.590 crying and weeping? They're grown adults and they say, I 0:06:54.630 --> 0:06:58.229 never understood. I never felt like my father never heard 0:06:58.230 --> 0:07:02.229 him say he loved me, I never knew that I 0:07:02.230 --> 0:07:06.070 was important. I never knew that I could do something. 0:07:06.070 --> 0:07:09.710 I felt like I had a distant relationship with my father. 0:07:09.790 --> 0:07:12.350 I wish he would have spoken to my life. I 0:07:12.350 --> 0:07:14.550 wish he would have encouraged me. I wish I would 0:07:14.590 --> 0:07:19.989 have known that he believed in me. There's power. I 0:07:20.030 --> 0:07:23.110 believe that a young man develops his identity, oftentimes through 0:07:23.110 --> 0:07:26.030 the words of his father, and a young girl develops 0:07:26.030 --> 0:07:29.310 her identity and how she relates to men also through 0:07:29.310 --> 0:07:34.550 the influence of a father. Young Timothy, whose father more 0:07:34.550 --> 0:07:38.710 than likely had passed away, was being spoken into by 0:07:38.710 --> 0:07:41.430 the Apostle Paul. And the apostle Paul was saying, I 0:07:41.430 --> 0:07:44.510 know you're timid, and I and I know sometimes you 0:07:44.510 --> 0:07:48.190 back away, but I believe that you're a leader. He 0:07:48.190 --> 0:07:51.110 was telling Timothy, stand up when you need to stand up. 0:07:51.230 --> 0:07:53.190 He was saying, you have a gift and a call 0:07:53.190 --> 0:07:55.270 in your life. And I believe in that gift and 0:07:55.270 --> 0:07:58.390 that call. Timothy went on to be an incredible leader 0:07:58.390 --> 0:08:01.960 because he had a man that believed in him. The 0:08:01.960 --> 0:08:06.000 Apostle Paul was not Timothy's father, but he was a mentor. 0:08:07.000 --> 0:08:10.400 And I want to challenge you and encourage you. If 0:08:10.440 --> 0:08:12.360 you have known the Lord for a while, if you're 0:08:12.360 --> 0:08:14.480 walking in God for a little bit, it doesn't mean 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:16.680 that you're perfect. But we need people like you to 0:08:16.720 --> 0:08:19.800 step up and say, I will share with someone else 0:08:20.200 --> 0:08:23.920 because someone poured into me. I'm willing to pour into 0:08:23.960 --> 0:08:28.200 someone else. We need mentors to step up and invest 0:08:28.200 --> 0:08:29.560 in other people's lives. 0:08:31.360 --> 0:08:35.400 What a great example from scripture. Paul and Timothy. Mark, 0:08:35.400 --> 0:08:37.640 for listeners who don't have the kind of parents that 0:08:37.640 --> 0:08:40.600 you had or have this spiritual mentor in their life, 0:08:41.080 --> 0:08:43.280 their past doesn't determine their future, does it? 0:08:43.840 --> 0:08:46.560 No, it doesn't. And I realize that more and more 0:08:46.559 --> 0:08:49.920 in the society that we live in. There's so much brokenness, 0:08:49.960 --> 0:08:54.240 dysfunction that it seems to be more and more rare 0:08:54.360 --> 0:08:57.800 for people to come from families that are whole and 0:08:57.800 --> 0:09:00.920 spiritually alive. And so I realized that probably most of 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:05.520 you listening come from some degree of brokenness in your family. 0:09:06.240 --> 0:09:09.360 Your family's background. First of all, if you come from 0:09:09.360 --> 0:09:11.600 a lot of brokenness, if you didn't grow up with 0:09:12.440 --> 0:09:17.120 a father present in the household, or if there was addiction, infidelity, 0:09:17.320 --> 0:09:21.000 divorce in your background, I want you to hear, hear me. Well, 0:09:21.559 --> 0:09:27.720 that does not determine your future. It does explain some 0:09:27.720 --> 0:09:31.160 of the challenges you face, some of the struggles with 0:09:31.160 --> 0:09:34.920 your identity, your worth, your value. It does tell me 0:09:34.960 --> 0:09:38.160 what are the cycles that you have to break, but 0:09:38.160 --> 0:09:40.960 it doesn't determine your destiny. And I think you need 0:09:40.960 --> 0:09:44.120 to know that because some people just allow it to. However, 0:09:44.559 --> 0:09:48.120 I would say that it's very easy to repeat the 0:09:48.120 --> 0:09:52.600 patterns that we've grown up with unless there is a 0:09:52.600 --> 0:09:55.959 determination to be a cycle breaker and legacy. 0:09:56.320 --> 0:09:57.760 Intentional steps, right? 0:09:57.800 --> 0:09:59.920 Yeah. So I always tell people they have to take 0:10:00.090 --> 0:10:04.650 bold steps to break their cycles. Actually, the the title 0:10:04.650 --> 0:10:09.570 of this program, Bold Steps, came from really challenging both 0:10:09.570 --> 0:10:13.450 men and women to to take bold steps, to break 0:10:13.450 --> 0:10:18.690 cycles and to create new legacies. I recently heard a 0:10:19.010 --> 0:10:22.210 young lady that I helped lead to Christ. She's married 0:10:22.210 --> 0:10:26.650 and has grandchildren now and came to Christ probably 25 0:10:26.690 --> 0:10:31.170 years ago. She told her story. She was her grandmother 0:10:31.170 --> 0:10:33.770 was a runaway that got pregnant. Her mother was a 0:10:33.770 --> 0:10:36.410 runaway that got pregnant. She ran away from her house 0:10:36.410 --> 0:10:39.210 and got pregnant. And she said, I determined when I 0:10:39.210 --> 0:10:41.689 came to Jesus, I was going to break that cycle. 0:10:41.690 --> 0:10:44.650 And I was very fearful for my daughter, who when 0:10:44.650 --> 0:10:48.570 she turned 16, 17, she was thinking about there was 0:10:48.570 --> 0:10:51.730 tension boiling up, and she brought her daughter on stage 0:10:51.730 --> 0:10:56.210 and she said she stayed, she got married and and 0:10:56.210 --> 0:10:59.570 she brought the little girl, that's her daughter and said, 0:10:59.570 --> 0:11:01.810 we have broken the cycle in Jesus name. 0:11:01.850 --> 0:11:05.090 Praise God! Wonderful. Well, you're listening to a special edition 0:11:05.090 --> 0:11:07.650 of Bold Steps with Mark Jobe. We're talking about building 0:11:07.650 --> 0:11:11.130 lasting spiritual influence. But what if we've messed up in life? 0:11:11.130 --> 0:11:14.090 What if we need to move forward after making some 0:11:14.130 --> 0:11:16.290 pretty big mistakes? We'll talk about that with our guest 0:11:16.290 --> 0:11:25.650 coming up on Bold Steps. You're listening to Bold Steps 0:11:25.650 --> 0:11:28.410 with Mark Jobe, and we will continue our conversation about 0:11:28.410 --> 0:11:32.530 building lasting spiritual influence in just a moment. Just a 0:11:32.530 --> 0:11:34.850 reminder that you can listen to Bold Steps wherever and 0:11:34.850 --> 0:11:38.370 whenever you like. We're online 24 over seven at Bold Steps. 0:11:38.370 --> 0:11:42.130 Org or listen to the podcast anytime, wherever you subscribe. 0:11:42.370 --> 0:11:45.369 You can also connect with us on social media, Facebook, 0:11:45.410 --> 0:11:49.930 Instagram and Mark's YouTube channel. Look for Bold Steps Radio 0:11:50.450 --> 0:11:53.890 and have you downloaded the Bold Steps app here and 0:11:53.890 --> 0:11:57.130 see full length messages and link to more content that 0:11:57.130 --> 0:11:59.809 will encourage and challenge you. It can all be found 0:11:59.809 --> 0:12:03.939 at Bold Steps. Well, right now we've got a special 0:12:03.980 --> 0:12:06.460 bold step gift available for our listeners as a book 0:12:06.500 --> 0:12:09.460 titled envy A Big Problem You Didn't Know you had 0:12:09.660 --> 0:12:11.819 written by our guest, pastor Mike Fabares. 0:12:12.220 --> 0:12:15.340 Yeah. By the way, many of you are familiar with 0:12:15.460 --> 0:12:20.220 pastor Mike because he's on the radio. He's written several books. 0:12:20.220 --> 0:12:23.699 He's a graduate from Moody Bible Institute and actually on 0:12:23.700 --> 0:12:26.300 the board of directors as well. And so love pastor 0:12:26.300 --> 0:12:31.660 Mike and his ministry. I was thinking about this topic 0:12:31.660 --> 0:12:38.380 of envy and how oftentimes we just don't consider ourselves envious. 0:12:39.220 --> 0:12:44.380 Pastor Mike, if you were to help someone self-diagnose whether 0:12:44.380 --> 0:12:47.380 they have envy, what would you point to? What should 0:12:47.380 --> 0:12:48.460 they be looking for? 0:12:48.780 --> 0:12:51.660 Well, I would start by saying, are there any people 0:12:51.660 --> 0:12:56.219 in your everyday world that you just find yourself erring 0:12:56.220 --> 0:13:00.540 on the side of being critical when you really shouldn't be. 0:13:00.540 --> 0:13:04.220 And you think, why am I not happy applauding their success, right? 0:13:04.260 --> 0:13:06.819 This is hard, but we need to look at the 0:13:06.820 --> 0:13:09.260 people that we are critical of. And if you look 0:13:09.260 --> 0:13:12.020 hard enough, you often find it's because I'm really envious 0:13:12.020 --> 0:13:15.460 of what they get that I don't have what they've accomplished, 0:13:15.460 --> 0:13:17.620 that I haven't been able to so that they make 0:13:18.220 --> 0:13:20.819 so much money, so much more money than I make. 0:13:20.940 --> 0:13:25.140 There's a lot of reasons that we, um, just spring 0:13:25.140 --> 0:13:29.179 into gossip and criticism and just talking behind people's back 0:13:29.179 --> 0:13:31.500 in a negative way. And usually we can start to 0:13:31.540 --> 0:13:34.700 realize what's happened is something really between me and God. 0:13:34.740 --> 0:13:36.420 It's really not between me and them. 0:13:37.340 --> 0:13:40.020 Pastor Mike, are envy and jealousy interchangeable? 0:13:40.860 --> 0:13:44.260 Not really. Um, there's a kind of jealousy that's appropriate 0:13:44.260 --> 0:13:46.420 in the Bible, right? God says he's a jealous God 0:13:46.420 --> 0:13:49.380 in Exodus 34. There's a time for you right to 0:13:49.420 --> 0:13:52.100 rightly in your marriage. Be jealous if there's something threatening 0:13:52.100 --> 0:13:55.900 that relationship. But envy is always seen as something wrong 0:13:55.900 --> 0:13:58.980 in Scripture, and we're never to envy anyone. And what 0:13:58.980 --> 0:14:01.790 envy is, is taking a jealous feeling when I have 0:14:01.790 --> 0:14:03.950 no right to feel jealous. And now I start to 0:14:03.950 --> 0:14:07.510 have a a bitterness toward that person for accomplishing or 0:14:07.510 --> 0:14:11.030 achieving or securing something that I haven't been able to. 0:14:11.150 --> 0:14:13.150 And Jesus tells parables about this. You've got to be 0:14:13.150 --> 0:14:15.750 careful in your own heart to guard your heart against 0:14:15.750 --> 0:14:19.510 this kind of envy, because it is different than jealousy, 0:14:19.510 --> 0:14:21.670 because sometimes jealousy can be appropriate. 0:14:21.790 --> 0:14:25.710 That's great. So there you have it, pastor Mike. We 0:14:25.750 --> 0:14:27.830 would love to get this book into your hand. It's 0:14:27.830 --> 0:14:32.030 called a big problem. You didn't know you had envy. 0:14:32.150 --> 0:14:33.350 Thank you, pastor Mike. 0:14:33.470 --> 0:14:35.390 And we'd be happy to send you a copy of 0:14:35.390 --> 0:14:37.590 the book when you make a donation of any amount 0:14:37.590 --> 0:14:40.950 to support bold steps. Again, it's titled envy. A big 0:14:40.950 --> 0:14:43.750 problem you didn't know you had. Just call us at 0:14:43.750 --> 0:14:51.390 800 Moody. Again, that's (800) 356-6639. Or give online and request 0:14:51.390 --> 0:14:56.110 this book by going to Bold Steps. You can also 0:14:56.110 --> 0:14:58.070 send your gift through the mail. Write to us at 0:14:58.950 --> 0:15:05.480 820 North LaSalle Boulevard, Chicago, Illinois, 606 ten. Again. Bold steps. 0:15:05.520 --> 0:15:16.840 820 North LaSalle, Chicago, Illinois. 606 ten. Glad to have 0:15:16.840 --> 0:15:19.200 you listening to Bold Steps today with Mark Jobe. Again, 0:15:19.200 --> 0:15:20.920 I'm Wayne Shepherd and we're going to have a guest 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:24.880 join us here. But we're talking about spiritual influencing and 0:15:24.880 --> 0:15:27.360 the importance of that. You had great parents who did that. 0:15:27.360 --> 0:15:29.720 And we need to be that kind of person, Mark. 0:15:30.000 --> 0:15:32.600 We do. And Wayne, we have someone with us today. 0:15:32.600 --> 0:15:34.840 I think that has put a lot of thought into this. 0:15:34.840 --> 0:15:40.080 Today we have Doctor Chris Rappaccini. He's associate professor of 0:15:40.080 --> 0:15:44.880 leadership at Anderson University in South Carolina, leadership life coach 0:15:44.880 --> 0:15:49.880 and founder of Faithful Steps Forward. So for 11 years 0:15:49.880 --> 0:15:53.119 he was a professor of pastoral studies here at Moody 0:15:53.160 --> 0:15:55.360 Bible Institute. And he's also. 0:15:55.360 --> 0:15:55.560 Yeah. 0:15:55.600 --> 0:15:58.040 Yeah, you've heard of that place, a moody alum as well. 0:15:58.400 --> 0:16:01.280 And so, Chris, welcome to Bold Steps. 0:16:01.320 --> 0:16:03.600 Well thank you Wayne. Thank you Mark I'm thrilled to 0:16:03.600 --> 0:16:04.400 be with you all. 0:16:04.880 --> 0:16:07.240 Sounds like our theme today is right up your alley. 0:16:07.640 --> 0:16:11.240 Well, I love talking about leadership. I love talking about, um, 0:16:11.280 --> 0:16:13.600 leaving a legacy as well. I like to tell people that, hey, 0:16:13.640 --> 0:16:17.400 the life you lead shapes the legacy that you leave. Because, hey, 0:16:17.440 --> 0:16:19.360 we all have decisions to make and people are going 0:16:19.400 --> 0:16:22.680 to remember those decisions long after we're gone. Whether it's 0:16:22.680 --> 0:16:25.840 gone from a work, uh, gone from a community, a neighborhood, 0:16:25.840 --> 0:16:28.280 or gone from this world into the next, people will 0:16:28.280 --> 0:16:30.360 remember us. So what kind of legacy do we want 0:16:30.400 --> 0:16:30.920 to leave? 0:16:31.160 --> 0:16:34.640 Yeah. That's great. That's a huge topic and a huge 0:16:34.640 --> 0:16:39.240 theme in bold steps. This whole idea of, uh, mentoring, 0:16:39.240 --> 0:16:43.040 breaking cycles, taking bold steps. So, Chris, tell us a 0:16:43.040 --> 0:16:48.760 little bit about young people today, spiritual mentoring, uh, how 0:16:48.760 --> 0:16:53.520 that affects and, um, the influence of spiritual mentoring, which 0:16:53.560 --> 0:16:57.200 we don't hear talk about enough, I don't think. 0:16:57.400 --> 0:17:00.080 Yeah. We don't we don't hear it talked about that much, 0:17:00.080 --> 0:17:02.160 but I can speak both from maybe the research but 0:17:02.160 --> 0:17:04.560 also my own personal life. So I had a father. 0:17:04.560 --> 0:17:06.640 He passed away when I was a teenager, so I 0:17:06.640 --> 0:17:09.520 was essentially fatherless. But then it was when I was 0:17:09.520 --> 0:17:12.959 in seminary that a professor reached out to me and 0:17:12.960 --> 0:17:16.639 mentored me. And what the research shows is that men, 0:17:16.640 --> 0:17:19.960 particularly in this day and age and with, you know, 0:17:20.000 --> 0:17:24.480 the divorce rates over the last several decades being relatively high, um, 0:17:24.480 --> 0:17:28.360 that young people are wanting those adult figures in their 0:17:28.359 --> 0:17:31.800 lives to help them, you know, point the way particularly 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:34.840 I think hopefully point the way to Christ. And what 0:17:34.840 --> 0:17:36.920 does it look like to be a follower of Jesus? 0:17:36.920 --> 0:17:40.320 And so it's so crucial. It's so important for, you know, 0:17:40.359 --> 0:17:42.880 the generations coming up right now. 0:17:43.160 --> 0:17:45.240 Hey. And I want you to hear that if you're 0:17:45.359 --> 0:17:48.680 listening and you're over 55 or 60 years old, because 0:17:48.680 --> 0:17:53.080 I oftentimes feel like some of the older people say, 0:17:53.200 --> 0:17:56.520 or more mature people should, I say, say, well, young 0:17:56.520 --> 0:17:58.879 people don't really want to hear from me. I can't 0:17:58.880 --> 0:18:02.369 connect with them. But you're right, Chris. The research says 0:18:02.369 --> 0:18:06.129 right now that there is a longing to connect, especially 0:18:06.290 --> 0:18:10.810 with mature adults. And in the spiritual realm, mature adults 0:18:10.810 --> 0:18:14.090 who love Jesus have a good marriage. There is a 0:18:14.130 --> 0:18:19.890 longing for that, especially in this generation. So I think mature, 0:18:20.609 --> 0:18:24.930 seasoned adults need to know how to bridge the conversation 0:18:25.290 --> 0:18:28.409 or invite people. And I think young adults need to 0:18:28.450 --> 0:18:29.930 know how to ask as well. 0:18:30.130 --> 0:18:32.129 That's right. Yeah. I think too often I like to 0:18:32.130 --> 0:18:35.290 say is we need to stop trying to impress the 0:18:35.290 --> 0:18:37.570 younger generation because we're not going to impress them, but 0:18:37.570 --> 0:18:41.770 we can make an impression on them by sharing our story, 0:18:41.770 --> 0:18:44.770 by talking about, um, you know, things that, that they 0:18:44.770 --> 0:18:48.690 care about as well. Now that's difficult. It's challenging because actually, 0:18:48.690 --> 0:18:51.609 what studies show is that they will listen to you, 0:18:51.609 --> 0:18:54.889 but first you have to listen to them, which can 0:18:54.930 --> 0:18:57.170 be kind of challenging because like, well, why do I 0:18:57.170 --> 0:18:59.660 want to listen to them complain about their slow Wi-Fi, 0:19:00.020 --> 0:19:02.540 you know. Or how come their Uber is late, right? 0:19:02.540 --> 0:19:03.979 I don't want to listen to that. But you do 0:19:03.980 --> 0:19:06.219 need to listen to those things. And then after you've 0:19:06.220 --> 0:19:08.700 listened to them, they will actually listen to you. And 0:19:08.700 --> 0:19:10.700 that's when you can make an impression on them. 0:19:10.740 --> 0:19:13.740 Mark and I talked about, uh, those who didn't have 0:19:13.740 --> 0:19:17.180 positive role models and how they overcome these generational cycles. 0:19:17.180 --> 0:19:19.380 What would you add to what we've talked about, Chris? 0:19:20.780 --> 0:19:23.939 Oh, that's a great question. I think you already mentioned this, 0:19:23.940 --> 0:19:27.540 but it takes intentionality. It takes making a purpose. And 0:19:27.540 --> 0:19:30.420 I think also one other thing is it takes building 0:19:30.420 --> 0:19:34.619 really strong habits. Um, you don't drift into mentoring, you 0:19:34.619 --> 0:19:39.260 don't drift into breaking cycles. You have to take the time. 0:19:39.260 --> 0:19:41.859 And actually, you know, maybe even, you know, put pen 0:19:41.859 --> 0:19:44.820 to paper. How am I actually going to take this 0:19:44.820 --> 0:19:48.260 bold next step? What am I actually going to do? 0:19:48.540 --> 0:19:49.740 And then you can do it. 0:19:50.300 --> 0:19:52.420 Well, Chris, before we let you go, one last question 0:19:52.420 --> 0:19:54.900 for you. Where do we start? Where does it begin 0:19:54.900 --> 0:19:57.740 for us to have this kind of influence, spiritual influence 0:19:57.740 --> 0:19:59.060 in someone else's life? 0:19:59.380 --> 0:20:02.899 I think it it starts. This is going to sound trite, 0:20:02.900 --> 0:20:05.820 but it starts with prayer. Ask the Lord to open 0:20:05.820 --> 0:20:08.780 up somebody or to put somebody on your heart that 0:20:08.780 --> 0:20:12.420 you know that is struggling right now, that needs help 0:20:12.580 --> 0:20:15.460 and that you can you can be that help for them, 0:20:15.460 --> 0:20:17.859 even if you're struggling yourself. I think one of the 0:20:17.859 --> 0:20:19.820 things that we can do, we think, well, we have 0:20:19.820 --> 0:20:21.820 to have it all figured out before we can help somebody. 0:20:21.859 --> 0:20:25.659 No you don't. Um, you are a sinner trying to 0:20:25.660 --> 0:20:28.340 help other sinners. And so we are on the way, 0:20:28.380 --> 0:20:31.459 on the road to to Christ. So I think that's 0:20:31.500 --> 0:20:34.939 where it starts. Is asking the Lord in prayer. God, 0:20:34.940 --> 0:20:36.500 where do you want to use me? Who do you 0:20:36.500 --> 0:20:38.140 want me to help? Who do you want me to 0:20:38.140 --> 0:20:40.500 serve today? And then see where he takes you. 0:20:41.140 --> 0:20:43.899 It's been great to have Doctor Chris Rappaccini with us today, 0:20:43.900 --> 0:20:46.500 the author of Moving Forward After Messing Up, and we're 0:20:46.500 --> 0:20:48.460 so grateful for your time, Chris. Thank you. 0:20:48.660 --> 0:20:49.300 Thank you Chris. 0:20:49.340 --> 0:20:50.780 Yeah. My pleasure. Thanks for having me. 0:20:50.820 --> 0:20:53.940 You know, Mark, uh. He's right. Uh, it begins with prayer, 0:20:53.940 --> 0:20:56.740 and it begins with being grounded in God's word. I mean, 0:20:56.780 --> 0:20:58.780 if we don't have something to give out, then why 0:20:58.780 --> 0:21:01.020 would we ever try to influence someone else? 0:21:01.060 --> 0:21:05.420 Absolutely. There's someone listening today that needs to take serious 0:21:05.420 --> 0:21:10.859 what Chris said. Start to pray. God use me. Is 0:21:10.859 --> 0:21:14.380 there someone that you want me to mentor and impart in? 0:21:14.780 --> 0:21:17.179 And maybe one of those ways you could do that. 0:21:17.220 --> 0:21:20.700 We wrote a booklet called Discovering Who You Are in Christ. 0:21:20.740 --> 0:21:23.899 It's a 15 day devotional. I think some some of 0:21:23.900 --> 0:21:27.699 us need to be reminded that we are someone in Christ. 0:21:27.740 --> 0:21:31.060 Our identity and our position is in Christ, not in 0:21:31.100 --> 0:21:33.820 who you are, but who you are in Christ. And 0:21:33.820 --> 0:21:37.980 maybe as you read or pray through this devotional 15 days, 0:21:38.180 --> 0:21:41.180 you could pray with the mentality saying, God, who am 0:21:41.180 --> 0:21:44.179 I in you? And who do you want me to 0:21:44.220 --> 0:21:48.740 coach in part mentor. Build a relationship with that could 0:21:48.740 --> 0:21:51.419 really help them. Some of you need to think of 0:21:51.420 --> 0:21:56.699 when you were 16, 20, 25, 23, the struggles you 0:21:56.700 --> 0:21:59.260 were going through and what it would have meant to 0:21:59.390 --> 0:22:03.230 have a mentor, a coach, a prayer partner at that 0:22:03.230 --> 0:22:06.470 time to walk you through that. And maybe, just maybe, 0:22:06.510 --> 0:22:09.190 God will lead you to a relationship that is life 0:22:09.230 --> 0:22:13.790 changing for, uh, a person that is next generation. 0:22:14.190 --> 0:22:16.949 Well, if today's message has resonated with you, and if 0:22:16.990 --> 0:22:20.310 you'd like to discover this booklet more than a label 0:22:20.310 --> 0:22:24.189 discovering who you are in Christ, just go to npr.org. 0:22:24.310 --> 0:22:27.350 Click on the devotional tab and you'll find it right there. 0:22:27.350 --> 0:22:29.629 And of course, your partnership with this program means a 0:22:29.630 --> 0:22:32.750 lot to us as well. Your consistent support allows us 0:22:32.750 --> 0:22:35.870 to plan effectively and expand this outreach to more families 0:22:35.869 --> 0:22:38.470 who need to hear about God's power to break cycles 0:22:38.470 --> 0:22:42.149 and build legacies, as we've talked about here today. Now, 0:22:42.150 --> 0:22:44.470 when you think about the influence your parents or mentors 0:22:44.470 --> 0:22:47.270 had on you, or perhaps the influence you wish you had, 0:22:47.590 --> 0:22:50.670 that's exactly the kind of impact your partnership makes possible 0:22:50.670 --> 0:22:54.350 for others. So please sign up today at npr.org, or 0:22:54.350 --> 0:23:02.430 call us at (800) 800-3566 66639. Well, what a meaningful, helpful 0:23:02.430 --> 0:23:04.910 conversation here today. Mark, thank you for this. But we've 0:23:04.950 --> 0:23:06.310 got to pray about this, don't we? 0:23:06.470 --> 0:23:09.629 We do. And I'd love to pray for that person 0:23:09.630 --> 0:23:13.070 right now that this has stirred something up in your heart. 0:23:13.070 --> 0:23:16.110 And maybe it's your own sons and daughters that you 0:23:16.109 --> 0:23:20.830 need to be mentoring. Uh, some of you are at 0:23:20.830 --> 0:23:25.030 the cusp of having to break cycles and determine, I 0:23:25.030 --> 0:23:30.470 will not pass this cycle of a critical spirit of infidelity, 0:23:30.510 --> 0:23:35.670 of addiction, of divorce, of, um, uh, whatever it may 0:23:35.710 --> 0:23:39.630 be that has plagued your family, that this cycle stops 0:23:39.630 --> 0:23:43.910 with me so that my children can have a new legacy. 0:23:44.350 --> 0:23:47.630 And so I'd like to pray for you, if you 0:23:47.630 --> 0:23:51.149 are right now, in one of those cycle breaking moments 0:23:51.150 --> 0:23:53.950 in your life and needing to make a decision. Father, 0:23:53.950 --> 0:23:56.949 I pray for that father who never had a father 0:23:56.950 --> 0:24:00.320 to invest in him and feels like I don't know 0:24:00.480 --> 0:24:03.240 what it is to lead a family in a godly way. 0:24:03.240 --> 0:24:06.159 I pray in Jesus name that they would feel the 0:24:06.160 --> 0:24:08.879 confidence that you give, that they would get the help, 0:24:08.880 --> 0:24:12.800 the instruction that they would determine. I will learn and 0:24:12.800 --> 0:24:15.040 grow to be a godly father. I will break the 0:24:15.040 --> 0:24:20.119 cycle of brokenness, abandonment, dysfunction, and I will set a 0:24:20.119 --> 0:24:24.000 new legacy for my family. I pray in Jesus name 0:24:24.000 --> 0:24:29.760 for that grandparent that maybe feels like their voice isn't important. 0:24:29.760 --> 0:24:32.240 Their influence doesn't matter. I pray that you would give 0:24:32.240 --> 0:24:35.360 them a greater sense of confidence that God yes, the 0:24:35.359 --> 0:24:39.119 voice of the mature, the voice of the seasoned has 0:24:39.119 --> 0:24:41.800 power in the next generation. Father, I pray that you 0:24:41.840 --> 0:24:47.160 would connect them with next generation young people that they 0:24:47.160 --> 0:24:50.040 can influence as well. I pray for the person that 0:24:50.040 --> 0:24:54.239 has a heart to mentor, but feels inadequate because of 0:24:54.240 --> 0:24:56.960 mistakes that they've made in their past life. God, I 0:24:56.960 --> 0:24:59.520 pray in Jesus name that they would understand the blood 0:24:59.520 --> 0:25:02.840 of Jesus and that they would sense the. What it 0:25:02.840 --> 0:25:05.960 means to be forgiven and not let the accusation and 0:25:05.960 --> 0:25:08.439 lies of the enemy keep them back from being an 0:25:08.440 --> 0:25:12.800 influence to other people. Father, so, God, we pray that 0:25:12.800 --> 0:25:16.119 we would take bold steps to break cycles, that we 0:25:16.119 --> 0:25:19.119 would identify those cycles and that we would create new 0:25:19.119 --> 0:25:21.160 cycles in Jesus name. 0:25:21.760 --> 0:25:24.840 Amen. That's Mark Jobe. And on behalf of Mark and 0:25:24.840 --> 0:25:28.200 our guest today, Doctor Chris Rappaccini, I'm Wayne Shepherd. Thank 0:25:28.200 --> 0:25:30.600 you for listening. You can find out more about resourcing 0:25:30.600 --> 0:25:34.400 available at Bold steps.org. And we pray that you'll step 0:25:34.400 --> 0:25:37.960 into the calling to become an influence spiritually in someone's 0:25:37.960 --> 0:25:41.359 life for Christ. Take on that challenge and you'll live 0:25:41.400 --> 0:25:43.359 a great life. Thank you for listening. We'll see you 0:25:43.359 --> 0:25:46.960 next time for Bold Steps. Bold steps is a production 0:25:46.960 --> 0:25:50.119 of Moody Radio, a ministry of Moody Bible Institute.