S1: Learning the secret of contentment today on Bold Steps with
S1: Mark Jobe.
S2: There's always going to be someone that's a little smarter,
S2: a little wealthier, a little brighter. There's always someone that's
S2: ahead of the ball game. And when we live in
S2: this mentality of comparison, it breeds a spirit of discontentment.
S1: Welcome to Bold Steps with Mark Jobe. Mark is founding
S1: pastor of New Life Community Church in Chicago. I'm Wayne Sheppard.
S1: We're in a series titled Relentless Pressing on when the
S1: pressure is on, and we've been learning about hope and joy.
S1: Today we'll be looking at the secret of contentment. Now
S1: his contentment, something that just happens to us. Or are
S1: there things that we can do to cultivate happiness and joy?
S1: Pastor Mark will explore those questions right now as we
S1: get started. If you have your Bible, feel free to
S1: turn to the book of Philippians. Mark will be teaching
S1: from chapter four verse ten.
S2: A secret is something that only a few people know
S2: and a whole lot of people don't understand. It's hidden
S2: from most, but revealed to few. A secret is something that, well,
S2: only a few people grass, but most people can't understand,
S2: don't know, haven't been explained or. It's a mystery to them.
S2: I believe by and large our world lives in deep discontentment.
S2: In fact, I believe that we have a culture of
S2: discontentment in our society. Most people you talk to are,
S2: by and large, unhappy and discontent. In fact, I've discovered that, well,
S2: I've discovered that advertisers put a lot of money into
S2: trying to to take advantage of our discontentment. Have you
S2: ever watched commercials? They spend millions of dollars trying to
S2: tap into your spirit of discontentment. What they try to
S2: tell you is that you're going to be unhappy and
S2: continue to be unhappy until you buy their product. Let's
S2: take shampoo, for example. I don't watch very many shampoo
S2: commercials that much. But if you see a shampoo commercial,
S2: the the typical shampoo commercial, you'll watch it and there'll
S2: be some frumpy girl with a very unhappy face and
S2: her hair looks all tangled and she looks very discontent,
S2: very unhappy with life before she uses that particular shampoo.
S2: And they'll show a shot of her, and she just
S2: looks like she's miserable. And then she uses the shampoo
S2: and they'll show her washing her hair in shampoo and
S2: using the shampoo. And then on the other side. She's
S2: in a convertible. Her hair is blowing in the wind.
S2: She's got a young, handsome, strapping guy driving the car
S2: over her, and she looks happy and free in life.
S2: And the commercial says, by our shampoo. And you too
S2: can experience the brilliance of beautiful hair and wonderful life.
S2: And the message behind this shampoo commercial is that before
S2: you use their product, you're very unhappy and discontent. But
S2: if only you would use their shampoo, then you too
S2: could be fulfilled and happy and living the dream of
S2: your life. Advertisers know that by and large, most of
S2: us are discontent, and most of us are looking for
S2: something to make us happier. And so they tap into
S2: the spirit of discontentment to try to sell their product,
S2: to try to let you know that if only you
S2: had their product, then you would be happy and content
S2: as well. I believe that we live in a discontent world,
S2: by and large, because we practice habits that make us discontent.
S2: I was thinking about this whole thing of discontentment, and
S2: I was thinking about my own life. And when I
S2: get discontent in life and I realize that there's four
S2: common habits, and there may be more than this, but
S2: there's four common habits that most people that are discontent
S2: practice on a regular basis. Habit number one, we compare
S2: ourselves habitually to others. You know, one of the greatest
S2: bad habits that leads to discontentment is the habit of
S2: comparing ourselves to others. Many of us, while we're fairly
S2: happy until we start looking at what someone else has.
S2: You've all been at a birthday party and little six
S2: year old gets a piece of cake and they're cutting
S2: up the birthday cake and the. The party organizer cuts
S2: a slice of chocolate cake and puts it in his plate.
S2: And he looks at the piece of chocolate cake that
S2: he's got. And he smiles and he says, thank you.
S2: He's so happy. He gets his fork and he's ready
S2: to eat. He's a smile across his face. And then
S2: he looks at the next six year old next to
S2: him who's got a piece of cake, but it's a
S2: little bigger than his. Suddenly his smile turns into a frown,
S2: and he says his piece is bigger than mine. You see,
S2: he was very happy until he compared his slice of
S2: the cake to the other person's slice of the cake,
S2: and suddenly that happiness and contentment turns into comparison and discontentment.
S2: Some of you have lived so long with this comparative
S2: mentality that it's second nature to you. Some of you
S2: ladies walk into any setting you're in a church setting,
S2: a party setting, a house setting, and you look around
S2: the room and you try to you compare yourself to
S2: other people. If someone is dressed nicer than you, someone
S2: looks better than you. Immediately you become insecure. Or if
S2: they look worse than you, then immediately you become confident
S2: and happy that you're the best looking person in the room.
S2: There's this comparative mentality around us, and so if we're
S2: doing better than others, we're happy. If others are doing
S2: better than us, we're unhappy. And how many of you
S2: know there's always going to be someone that has more
S2: than we have? There's always going to be someone that's
S2: a little smarter, a little wealthier, a little brighter, someone
S2: that's always going to have something a little bigger than
S2: what we have. There's always someone that's ahead of the
S2: ball game. And when we live in this mentality of comparison,
S2: it breeds a spirit of discontentment. The second habit that
S2: causes us to be become discontent is devaluating what we
S2: currently possess. We look at what we have and we say,
S2: this is nothing. Then we become discontent. What I've discovered
S2: is that many of us. We strive to get something,
S2: but once we have it, we start devaluating it. We.
S2: We no longer appreciate it. Many of us strive. You
S2: work and work and work to get something, and once
S2: you get it, you don't appreciate it. You get it.
S2: And you say, I don't like it. Some of your
S2: wives were shocked and surprised because while you were dating them,
S2: your husband was Mr. Romantic and the flowers would come,
S2: the doors were open, the poetry was written, songs were
S2: invoked and sweet words were whispered. And you thought, he's
S2: such a romantic. He's such a nice guy. Oh, this guy,
S2: he buys me gifts all the time. I'm just married.
S2: And then he got married. Put a ring on your
S2: finger and suddenly he changed. And you say, what happened
S2: to Mr. Romance? Well, he got you. Now his attention
S2: is focused on other things. He's already got you. So
S2: now he's focused on other things. And you say, hey,
S2: I thought he was always going to be that way.
S2: But oftentimes, once we get something, we stop valuing what
S2: it is. We value what we don't have. But once
S2: we possess it, we no longer value it. The third
S2: habit that I've seen in a lot of people that
S2: have a spirit of discontentment is focusing on what they
S2: don't have. I run into so many people that live
S2: their life either bemoaning what they've lost or wishing for
S2: what they don't have. You live constantly in this place
S2: of being sad over the youth that you've lost, the
S2: friends that are no longer there, your health that's not
S2: as good as it used to be. The place that
S2: you used to live in the high school you attended,
S2: the college you were at. You bemoan what you've lost,
S2: and you can't wait to something that you don't have,
S2: but you constantly live in that place of looking at
S2: what you either lost or you don't have, and you're
S2: never content with what you do have. There are some
S2: people that are constantly living that way, constantly bemoaning what
S2: they don't have. You don't look at it's the proverbial
S2: we don't look at the glass that's half full. We
S2: look at the glass that's half empty. We don't look
S2: at the things that we possess. We look at the
S2: things that we don't possess. We look at our surroundings
S2: and we say, I'm lacking something. When we habitually compare
S2: ourselves to others, when we devalue what we currently possess,
S2: when we focus on what we don't have, and when
S2: we're not living in the present and enjoying the present.
S2: Let me talk about that last habit. I run into
S2: a lot of people as well, encounter a lot of
S2: people that never enjoy the present. They're either fixated on
S2: the future. I'm not happy right now because I don't
S2: have a man, but once I have a man, I'm
S2: going to be happy. I'm waiting for my knight in
S2: shining armor, and once I have a man, I'll be happy.
S2: And so you live continually thinking once I have a man.
S2: You walked into church this morning and said, Lord, he
S2: may be here. Oh, Jesus, guide the usher to have
S2: me sit beside the man that may be that man.
S2: You look to your right, you look to your left.
S2: You said, no, definitely not, Lord. And you're wondering when
S2: you have. And then you get that man and you say, Lord,
S2: when he gets a job that I really like. And Lord,
S2: now that he has the job, when we get the
S2: house that we really want, Lord, then I will be happy.
S2: And then you have the house and you say, well,
S2: what's a house without kids in it? Only when we
S2: have kids and I'll be happy. Then you have your
S2: first pregnancy and you have a kid and you say,
S2: Praise God for this. This is great. But once this
S2: kid gets out of diapers, then I'll be very happy
S2: because I can't stand this diaper phase. And then they
S2: got diapers and you say, I don't have any free time.
S2: Once they go to school, then I'll be happy and
S2: then they start going to school and you say, well,
S2: they really need a little brother and sister. Once I
S2: have a little brother or sister, then I'll be happy.
S2: You're continually saying you'll be happy when something happens in
S2: the future, but when it happens, you're still not happy.
S2: You haven't paused to say thank you. I'm enjoying the
S2: current and blessing you for the season that I'm living.
S2: And when you practice these four habits of discontentment, it
S2: leads to envy, jealousy, greed, resentment, and overall, it takes
S2: away your contentment.
S1: You're listening to Bold Steps with Mark Jobe, and we're
S1: going to continue with this message in just a moment. First,
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S1: Now back to today's message the secret of contentment. Here
S1: again is Mark Jobe.
S2: What is contentment? Contentment is the quality or state of
S2: being contented. It's the inner sense of well-being that defies
S2: your circumstances. Contentment is finding rest in God and the
S2: resources for his life. Contentment doesn't mean that everything is
S2: going well. It doesn't mean passivity. It doesn't mean lack
S2: of ambition. Contentment simply means that you, right now, as
S2: you stand, as you sit that right now, you have
S2: an inner sense of well-being. Like I'm at peace resting.
S2: I'm content with who God is, where I am, and
S2: what's God doing in my life. The Apostle Paul is
S2: writing this letter from a jail. He's not in a fancy,
S2: luxurious home. He's not kicking back in Cancun with his
S2: sandals up on some lawn chair. There's no little umbrella
S2: in his drink. He's in a jail. Prison guards. His
S2: freedom is taken away from him. He's in a dirty,
S2: dark dungeon. Writing this letter And the purpose of his letter.
S2: The focus of his letter is I want you to
S2: experience joy even when your circumstances can stress you out.
S2: And so he gives them really three important lessons they
S2: need to learn about contentment. That I'm going to rehearse
S2: for you today, and I hope you're taking notes because
S2: you need to grasp this because I believe in the
S2: lessons are found the secret of contentment. Number one, he says,
S2: and I want you to jot this down. Contentment is
S2: an attitude that you can learn regardless of your circumstances.
S2: Key word learn. In verse ten, the apostle Paul says,
S2: I rejoice greatly in the Lord. Notice he's not rejoicing
S2: in his circumstance. Is he rejoicing in the Lord? The
S2: Apostle Paul is saying, I'm putting into practice rejoicing even
S2: in my bad circumstances that at last you renewed your
S2: concern for me. Paul is saying, I'm glad that you're
S2: concerned for me. I started the church. I invested seeds
S2: in there. And he said, indeed, you were concerned, but
S2: you had no opportunity to show it. There was no email, Twitter, Facebook, telephone,
S2: cell phone, smartphone in those times. So Paul was in prison.
S2: He knew that the congregation was concerned about him, but
S2: they hadn't had an opportunity to demonstrate concern for him.
S2: And he says, I knew you were concerned, but you
S2: didn't have an opportunity to show your concern. And then
S2: he says in verse 11, I'm not saying this because
S2: I'm in need. He says, I'm not needy. I may
S2: have needs, I'm not needy. But then he says, I'm
S2: not saying this because I'm in need, for I have learned.
S2: Say that with me together, learned to be content whatever
S2: the circumstances. Paul is saying that the attitude of of
S2: contentment is a learned attitude. It's not subject to your circumstances.
S2: Many of us believe that we are content or not
S2: content completely based on whether our circumstances are good or
S2: our circumstances are bad. Paul says that regardless of what
S2: your circumstances are, you can learn to be content. It's
S2: a learned attitude. In fact, the word that he uses
S2: in the Greek and the Bible, the New Testament was
S2: written in ancient Greek. And so when we look at
S2: the original Greek, sometimes we can understand those words a
S2: little bit more clearly what he's saying. And so he
S2: says the word that's used in the Greek is the
S2: same word that's used of a city that doesn't need
S2: any imports. Therefore a self-contained. Paul is saying, I don't
S2: need anything from the outside to make me content. I
S2: don't need any Imports to make me content, because what
S2: I have already in my city makes me content. Let
S2: me translate that. Paul is saying I don't need anything
S2: to come from the outside to make me have a
S2: sense of well-being in the middle of a prison sentence,
S2: in the middle of stress. I still have contentment because
S2: my contentment isn't based on whether I have something from
S2: the outside that comes to me or not. My contentment
S2: is based on an inner quality, not an external stimulus
S2: in my life. You don't need any imports to make
S2: you content. Some of you are still waiting for that import.
S2: Some of you are saying, well, I would be a
S2: much more content and happy person if my husband would
S2: change his attitude. So once my husband changes his attitude,
S2: then I will be content until he changes his attitude.
S2: I'm going to be a bitter, angry, unhappy woman because
S2: I'm a victim of my husband's bad attitude. Hello? In essence,
S2: you're saying if I get an import of a good attitude,
S2: then I'll be content. But as long as I don't
S2: have a good attitude for my husband, I'll be miserable.
S2: That makes you a what? A victim. Say that together.
S2: That makes you a what a victim? Victims are powerless.
S2: Victims say I can't be content until someone else makes
S2: me content. Victims look to their circumstances to change and
S2: act like they have no power over their own attitude
S2: unless their circumstances change. The single girl says, I won't
S2: be happy until I find Mr. Right. Once I find
S2: a man, finally I feel happy. Someone that loves me unconditionally.
S2: A godly man. Until I find him, I'll be unhappy.
S2: Then I finally can be content. I need Mr. Right.
S2: The married woman says I married Mr. Wrong. As long
S2: as I have this guy, I'm going to be unhappy.
S2: Once I get rid of this guy, then I'll be
S2: finally happy. One guy, one woman thinks she needs a man.
S2: One woman thinks she needs to get rid of a man.
S2: And they're both thinking I'm a victim of my circumstances
S2: and I can't be happy until my circumstances change. As
S2: long as I work at my current job, I can't
S2: be happy because it's a toxic environment. Only when I
S2: switch jobs can I be content. So as long as
S2: I'm at this job, I have to be unhappy. I'm
S2: a victim of my circumstances and someone says, I can't
S2: be happy when we're living paycheck to paycheck because it
S2: puts stress on me. I look at my sister, she's
S2: living a good life. She goes on vacation, has a
S2: nice car, lives in a nice neighborhood. If I live
S2: like my sister, I would be happy. But as long
S2: as my my, my financial circumstances are like this, I
S2: can't be happy. Once my husband or I get a
S2: better job, then suddenly I can be happy and content
S2: when my circumstances change. That makes you a victim. I
S2: want you to tell. I want you to understand something.
S2: You are not a victim of your circumstances. Turn to
S2: three people and say, I'm not a victim of my circumstances.
S2: Come on, I said three. I'm not a victim of
S2: my circumstances. I am not a victim of my circumstances. Oh,
S2: I may not have the best circumstances in life. My
S2: circumstances not may may not be ideal, but I am
S2: not a victim. I have power over my attitude in
S2: the middle of my bad circumstances. AM I preaching to
S2: myself today or not? I need to hear this message.
S2: Paul is saying, I have learned, learned to be content.
S2: The second thing that Paul goes on to tell us
S2: in the following verses is not only that he has
S2: learned to be content, but look at what it says
S2: in verse 12. I know what it is to be
S2: in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.
S2: I have learned the secret of being content in any
S2: and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living
S2: in plenty or living in one. The second thing I
S2: want you to write down about contentment is this contentment
S2: is an attitude that you can keep in the midst
S2: of changing situations. Paul says, I have learned to be
S2: content when I'm at the bottom of the barrel scraping,
S2: or when my barrel is overflowing. He says this word.
S2: I have learned the secret of being content in every situation.
S2: I don't believe that people are happier when they're wealthier
S2: or sadder when they're poor. I believe that our contentment
S2: lies on our inner disposition and the choices that we make.
S1: You're listening to Bold Steps and a message from Mark
S1: Jobe titled The Secret of Contentment. And remember, if you
S1: ever miss one of these programs on the radio, you
S1: can always catch up online at bold steps.org. Mark, let's
S1: talk about our bold step gift. One of the biggest
S1: barriers people face when it comes to faith is the
S1: problem of suffering. If God is good, why is there
S1: so much pain in the world? You encounter this question,
S1: don't you?
S3: So many times, and sometimes in a very intense way,
S3: with tears coming down someone's face. They asked something like,
S3: how could this happen? Why did God allow this? If
S3: God is good, why did he allow this to happen?
S3: And those are tough, tough questions, especially when we're suffering loss.
S3: But Lee Strobel tackles that head on.
S1: Yeah. He's done us a good favor here hasn't he?
S3: Yeah. In his book A case for Faith, he talks
S3: about since evil and suffering exist, how can God be loving?
S3: But he tackles a lot of tough issues like that.
S3: That may be holding you back from talking to people.
S3: Or maybe as you've talked to people you've encountered these
S3: questions don't know how to answer. Like, do miracles contradict science?
S3: Can they be true? What about evolution versus creation? How
S3: does that work together? Is it offensive to claim that
S3: Jesus is the only way? Would a loving God really
S3: send people to hell? A lot of things like that
S3: that sometimes people get stuck on. Or maybe people have
S3: asked you as a believer and you're like, oh, let
S3: me get back to you. This is a great book
S3: that we would love to put in your hands.
S1: Yes. And Lee was a man without faith, did not
S1: believe in God. He was an investigative journalist and decided
S1: to tackle the topic. And lo and behold, he's a
S1: preeminent apologist for the Christian faith now.
S3: So he was in Chicago, and it was his own
S3: journey exploring Christianity that he realized, wow, this is true
S3: as he dug more into it. And he's been a
S3: great apologist for the faith.
S1: Yes, indeed. And to request your copy of The Case
S1: for Faith, give a donation of any amount to support
S1: the Bold Steps Ministry. You can give online at bold
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S1: for Mark job. But that's all the time we have today.
S1: Be sure to come back tomorrow when Mark explains what
S1: true contentment looks like. That's coming up Tuesday on bold
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