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S1: Michael writes. Gary, I think my wife's love language is

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S1: acts of service, but she always complains that I don't

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S1: do a good enough job at the things I do

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S1: for her. Why is this?

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S2: Here's a clue. Say to her, I would love to

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S2: help you do this. Whatever the project is, whether it's

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S2: vacuuming floors or washing dishes or cleaning the car. I

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S2: would love to help you with this. Tell me what's

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S2: important to you. When I do this so that you're

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S2: really trying to not only do it, you're trying to

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S2: do it her way. That will speak volumes to her.

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S2: I know you feel discouraged when you spend an hour

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S2: and don't get positive feedback, but if you ask her

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S2: beforehand how you could do this, what she would like

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S2: for you to do and how she would like for

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S2: you to do it, you're far more likely to find

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S2: the affirmation that you're looking for.

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S3: Doctor Gary Chapman is the author of The Five Love Languages.

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S3: For more, visit five Love languages.com.