S1: Welcome back to Work women. I am particularly excited for
S1: today's episode because we are talking all things wedding. Fun
S1: fact I just got married just a few weeks ago
S1: on ten, ten, 2021 and I documented the whole process
S1: on YouTube. I did a 30 day vlog countdown. So
S1: every day for 30 days, for the 30 days leading
S1: up to the wedding, I was going behind the scenes
S1: as to what was going well, how we were prepping,
S1: how to plan a destination wedding, what you do when
S1: things go wrong, planning for a wedding but on the
S1: tail end. Now that the wedding has happened, I've experienced it.
S1: I've lived through it. Hopefully it is the last one.
S1: Everybody always says, you know, well, what if what if
S1: you could do it again? I'm like, listen, I have
S1: no intention just putting this out there, zero intention whatsoever
S1: of doing this. Again, I learned my lessons. I don't
S1: need to really learn from them for another wedding. However,
S1: you can learn from negative experiences. I would be lying
S1: if I said that there were just only blissful moments
S1: because the reality is shit went wrong. Shit totally went wrong.
S1: I can go into detail about some of the things
S1: that went wrong, but I want to get to your
S1: questions because on Instagram I put out a Q&A response
S1: to get people to ask whatever wedding questions they had.
S1: So today I'm going to be answering all things wedding questions.
S1: Let's get into this first one. Were you nervous for
S1: your wedding? This came from Maria. Were you nervous for
S1: your wedding on the day of. I was pure giddy. Joy. Excitement.
S1: Just like, to be honest. Like I was happy. I
S1: was incredibly happy. Brian and I did not do the
S1: traditional thing where you, like, stay in separate bedrooms. We
S1: stayed in the same bedroom the night before we woke up,
S1: and we were just excited about what was about to happen.
S1: We were looking forward to it. We got to share.
S1: In that moment, I didn't feel like I needed that
S1: time alone. I had plenty of alone moments ahead of
S1: time where I could really just be present for the process,
S1: and I think that that would be my biggest tip.
S1: If you are feeling nervous, or if you feel like
S1: time is just flying by really quickly, I would do
S1: everything that you can to remove distractions. Like I didn't
S1: watch any television leading up to this wedding. Not that
S1: I watch a lot of television to begin with, but
S1: like I wanted time to slow down. That was a
S1: big intention for me. I didn't want it just to
S1: fly by and and everybody always says, oh, it's such
S1: a blur. It's like, well, if everyone says it's such
S1: a blur, how do I make it not a blur?
S1: I don't want it to be a blur. Another piece
S1: on this is if you're nervous, the last thing that
S1: you should do is drink alcohol. I know that when
S1: I've been nervous in the past, like it's just easy.
S1: You feel like maybe. Oh, it'll make you feel a
S1: little better. Absolutely not. On the wedding day, I didn't
S1: drink at all. that night, you know? Let's just, like,
S1: really talk about what didn't go. Well, that might have
S1: something to do with the fact that on Friday night,
S1: what was Sunday night? On Friday night, I just went crazy.
S1: I don't remember the last time that I drank excessively,
S1: like it's probably been since college. It's been years and years.
S1: I do not drink very often, and I just decided
S1: to take eight shots of tequila on Friday night on
S1: the dance floor. And if you know me or have
S1: spent time around me, me taking one shot is something
S1: that you've likely never seen ever. Unless maybe you went
S1: to college together. Even then, I didn't drink very much,
S1: so I just decided to have the greatest time possible
S1: on Friday night. I'm very thankful that I did that.
S1: I had a blast. Like, I was just it's hard to,
S1: you know, continue to say I'm happy, but I was
S1: just so happy. So if you're nervous the day of
S1: again recommendation don't drink. Remove distractions. Try to be as
S1: present as possible because as you're approaching your wedding, everybody
S1: will talk about how much of a blur it is.
S1: And I just wanted to make the active, conscious decision. Hey,
S1: wait a second. It is not going to be a blur.
S1: All right, let's see what other questions we got here.
S1: Have you adjusted to the word husband yet instead of fiance?
S1: That's an interesting question. Uh, yes, I have adjusted. Brian
S1: and I have been together for many, many years, and
S1: I've viewed him as a bigger role than just fiance
S1: for a long, long time prior to us getting engaged.
S1: I think the reason that Brandon proposed, he says that
S1: he was always planning it, but I called BS on
S1: this prior to him proposing to me. We drove into
S1: this community that we are a part of in Mexico,
S1: and I was driving the car and I had to say, hey,
S1: it's Natalie Workman. Brandon Dawson and I are going to
S1: the ledges. That's the community place or. And the guy
S1: asked me, what's your relationship to the owner? And I said, girlfriend,
S1: because at the time, even though we got the place together.
S1: I was the girlfriend and he was like, you're not
S1: my girlfriend. It's like, yeah, actually, technically I am your girlfriend.
S1: So it moved from girlfriend for like 4 or 5
S1: years to fiancée for almost three years, and now husband.
S1: But we've been business partners. We are best friends. He
S1: is my mentor. Like the role thing. He's still that
S1: same person. But I would say that. What's changed? Question
S1: number three. Uh, Aaron asked, what's changed since you got married?
S1: What's changed is we are in this together. We have
S1: always been 100% locked in together to each other, but
S1: more than anything, it sets the tone for everybody else
S1: around us that we are in alignment. We are in
S1: this for the long haul. We are committed to each other.
S1: Brian and I have a 25 year age difference, and
S1: I was very nervous and insecure about what people thought
S1: of us when they looked at us. I no longer
S1: have those same insecurities like on a daily basis. I
S1: might think about it like once every couple of months
S1: when something comes up. But the idea of being a partner,
S1: like legally by the state of Florida, like we're recognized
S1: as a couple. And once that transition is made, not
S1: to us, but to everyone else. I do think that
S1: there is something different. I do feel different. It's not like, oh,
S1: it's just the same as when we were fiancés or
S1: when we were just dating like, no, we're freaking husband
S1: and wife in every single day. When you hear the
S1: weight of a husband or a wife, it's a new role.
S1: It's a new set of responsibilities. It was never like
S1: we were going to go in or out of the relationship,
S1: but there's like no outs any longer. I like to
S1: reference Wedding Crashers, one of my favorite movies growing up,
S1: when I think her name is Elsa Fisher, the redhead,
S1: she's like, I will find you. She like, does this
S1: little thing will please drop that audio in here? Because
S1: it's hilarious.
S2: You're amazing. Oh, God, I think you're amazing. Oh, my God.
S3: Don't ever leave me. Ever. good because I'd find you.
S1: I say that to him all the time. I'm like, listen,
S1: if you ever tried to do anything like pull out
S1: the creepy little voice and tell him I will find him,
S1: and then he laughs hysterically, I will bring him back
S1: on here because you should watch the face. Maybe it's laughing.
S1: Maybe it's like a little bit of terror. I'm not
S1: really sure. It doesn't matter because guess what? We are
S1: committed and that is a very important differentiator with being married.
S1: I did not always think that that was going to
S1: be the case for what I wanted, but am so
S1: glad and like, feel very proud that that was the
S1: right decision for us and for anybody who is looking
S1: to take the next step in their relationship. All right,
S1: let's get into some more questions. Mike, Lulu asked, why
S1: did you marry Brandon and how did you meet him?
S1: I trust Brandon implicitly. Brandon has had the greatest impact
S1: on my life single, single handedly out of anybody that
S1: I've ever met. He inspires me every single day. He
S1: pushes me. He doesn't listen to excuses that I come
S1: up with. He doesn't allow me to think that I'm
S1: not worthy of things he like. He really is the
S1: greatest mentor, but then also friend I've ever had. I've
S1: always struggled having girlfriends growing up. Like there was just some,
S1: like in high school and middle school, I just I'm
S1: not one of those self-proclaimed like guys, girls. Like, I
S1: really wanted girlfriends, but I just never had a true
S1: best friend or a group of girls who were really supportive.
S1: And when Brandon and I first started dating, and still
S1: to this day, it's like he's my freaking best friend.
S1: We can be doing anything, anywhere, in any part of
S1: the world together, and we're good when it's just the
S1: two of us. And so there was never this moment
S1: where it was like a light bulb. Like, I know
S1: that you were going to be the person that I'm
S1: with forever. It was just a long, slow build of
S1: confidence and trust and going after goals and being committed
S1: to the future. That made us pretty easily decide like, hey,
S1: let's let's make this thing official, let's move forward with
S1: all of this. So that's why I married him now
S1: how I met him. What a story. I'm going to
S1: give you the truncated version of the story because it
S1: could get a little lengthy. I was 12 years old
S1: at a Super Bowl party that my parents threw. That's
S1: really like the punchline of the whole thing. We did
S1: not start dating when I was 12, however. He was
S1: my neighbor and he had just recently moved into the neighborhood.
S1: I started working for him about a decade later. We
S1: were working on this leadership project, and it was really
S1: the first time that I'd ever heard of personal development
S1: and personal growth and how you can improve yourself. And so,
S1: through his leadership content, I was responsible for cutting up
S1: the videos and taking notes and restructuring some of his content.
S1: And through learning his content, I was like, wow, I've
S1: really made changes in myself. And he and I continued
S1: to connect over growth and development. So it's funny. Fast
S1: forward almost a decade like this is what we do
S1: for a living. We help people grow and develop. But
S1: that's initially why I was working with him was to
S1: work on this project, and now it really is what
S1: we do as our life's work together. So that's the
S1: that's the short story. If you ever see Brandon in person,
S1: he'll give you the long story, which is also very
S1: fun and entertaining. All right. Let's see the other questions.
S1: Sariah asked. What is the most what was the most
S1: surreal moment for you being in Cabo and having the
S1: most incredible people around to celebrate? This is a big
S1: one for me. If you are not married, if you
S1: are thinking of getting married, if you're recently divorced, I
S1: would recommend adopting this philosophy that I took into this marriage.
S1: I waited for years and years and years. We've been
S1: together for a very long time. But I waited to
S1: get married. I did not push it. I did not
S1: want this wedding until I was who I wanted to be.
S1: And a reflection of me or any person is the
S1: group of people that they have around them. And I
S1: have great family and I have a handful of friends,
S1: but I five, eight years ago was not the same
S1: person that I am today. I didn't have a group
S1: of people who were supportive of me. I didn't have
S1: a group of people that would push me. I didn't
S1: have a large group that I was like, wow, these
S1: are the people that I'm going to keep in my
S1: life and that are going to continue to grow and
S1: develop with me. And so for the longest time, I
S1: was just like, you know, I'm not ready to have
S1: this wedding because I want that wedding to be the future.
S1: I want to be able to look at these people
S1: and say, wow, they are responsible for helping me grow.
S1: And when we showed up in Cabo, I think the
S1: most overwhelming thing for Brandon and I is just the
S1: quality of the people that were there. For me. That's
S1: what it was. It was I have made a significant
S1: amount of sacrifices over the last eight years. I've had
S1: to cut people out of my life over the last
S1: eight years to get to where I am today and
S1: to to have people who do love me and do
S1: support me around and and celebrating that moment. Like, I
S1: think the question was spot on, like the moment was
S1: surreal and it was really rewarding and gratifying for the
S1: work that both Brandon and I have done for the
S1: time that we've been together, in order to be able
S1: to create an experience like that. Pablo asked, how did
S1: you determine a wedding budget and what to spend it on?
S1: This is a hot topic for weddings, to be honest
S1: with you. When Brandon and I both initially saw the
S1: price of this wedding, I was like, abso fucking lutely not. Like, no,
S1: we are not spending that much on an event for
S1: a weekend. I don't care that much about a wedding. Like, really,
S1: I'm not one of those, like, wedding girls. And then
S1: all of a sudden we saw the images and we
S1: were sold on it. Like, we got sold on all
S1: of the different wedding things, and we really didn't stress
S1: around that. Initially, though, we were just I mean, we
S1: were like, let's just elope. There's no need to to
S1: spend this much money on something because it's an investment.
S1: And if Brandon and I weren't in the financial position
S1: that we are in today, I would categorically, absolutely tell somebody,
S1: you should not spend money on this. Spend money on
S1: a ten year anniversary when you have created wealth, when
S1: you have created a business, when there's something that you're
S1: able to really like from a financial standpoint sink into,
S1: if you have these big, grandiose dreams about what your
S1: wedding looks like. In my previous podcast on this, you
S1: could go to it a couple episodes back called Wedding
S1: Planning from Hell. We talk about where we did intentionally
S1: spend money. One of those items was having this big
S1: house for everybody to spend time in. We wanted to
S1: be able to connect with people. It wasn't just, oh,
S1: here's a spectacular event. To me, the least fun part
S1: of the whole wedding was the actual wedding. Like, yes,
S1: it was beautiful and all of that, but I really
S1: wanted to spend time with people that we love. That
S1: was the purpose for me. It wasn't just to have
S1: these photos and these videos of and these moments of
S1: the event. And so if you are going to invest
S1: and choose to spend your hard earned money on an
S1: event like this, I would highly, highly, highly prioritize. Like,
S1: what are the moments that you can bring people together
S1: to truly celebrate? This goes back to the previous question.
S1: If you don't like the people that you're going to
S1: be spending time with and celebrating with, don't do it.
S1: Don't put yourself in this very traditional wedding structure just
S1: so that you can spend time with people who aren't
S1: really supportive of you, who aren't on the same page,
S1: who aren't going in the same direction. Speaking of going
S1: in the same direction, Brian and I have been coaching
S1: couples for the last few years around. How do you
S1: get in alignment with each other when it comes to
S1: spending decisions? When it comes to business decisions and personal decisions,
S1: like what do you do to create that alignment? We've
S1: created this alignment guide and I would love to give
S1: it to you for free. You can access it at
S1: Cardinal ventures.com/alignment that is Cardinal ventures.com/alignment in order to get
S1: this free downloadable as to how to take the next
S1: steps in conversations with a significant other or partner. Some
S1: sort of business partner for getting in alignment together. With that,
S1: I hope you enjoyed all things wedding. I'm definitely getting
S1: used to Natalie Dawson. It's true that it is a
S1: little bit difficult to get all of these things changed,
S1: and to update your last name everywhere. My recommendation is
S1: it is certainly worth it. And the final note on
S1: This Is the Work Woman podcast will not be experiencing
S1: any name changes. We are not going to be doing work.
S1: Dawson work. Manson like none of that is happening. It
S1: is still staying as work. Woman. Even though my last
S1: name is Workman has changed because I'm still a work woman.
S1: And if you are an ambitious female in the workplace
S1: who is a leader who is aspiring to be a leader,
S1: this is the place for you. I love that you're here.
S1: I so appreciate the loyal group of people who listen
S1: to this show. If this podcast has made an impact
S1: on you, please do me the greatest favor by sharing it,
S1: by ensuring that you're subscribed. And if you love it,
S1: leave a review. I can hardly wait to see you
S1: next Tuesday on work! Woman.