WEBVTT - How I Prepare for Difficult Conversations 0:00:09.550 --> 0:00:15.090 Welcome back to Building Billions. Let's talk about default conversations. 0:00:15.100 --> 0:00:18.939 I have found myself having a more difficult conversations than 0:00:18.940 --> 0:00:21.730 I can count as of late, and it made me 0:00:21.730 --> 0:00:25.329 realize I've never done a podcast on how I prep 0:00:25.329 --> 0:00:28.180 for these conversations, and the framework that I use to 0:00:28.180 --> 0:00:31.090 make these conversations go well. You know, I do have 0:00:31.090 --> 0:00:33.790 to shout out my husband right now because he is 0:00:33.790 --> 0:00:36.610 the master of getting what he wants. And sometimes that 0:00:36.610 --> 0:00:39.580 is very frustrating because it even works on me. But 0:00:39.580 --> 0:00:45.700 his ability to guide a conversation, to take somebody along, 0:00:45.700 --> 0:00:52.030 a journey with him, exploring options, alternatives to finally land 0:00:52.030 --> 0:00:56.560 on what he wants and to get agreements. It's just 0:00:56.950 --> 0:01:01.150 it's almost magical. And I don't want you to think 0:01:01.150 --> 0:01:03.400 that it's magical because it can be learned, and it's 0:01:03.400 --> 0:01:08.289 something that I have dramatically improved on over the last 0:01:08.290 --> 0:01:11.110 ten years. He's still the master, I just have to 0:01:11.110 --> 0:01:14.620 say that. But for somebody who used to just fumble 0:01:14.620 --> 0:01:17.770 through conversations, not have certainty with their words, and it 0:01:17.770 --> 0:01:20.860 wasn't that long ago like you can learn a lot 0:01:20.860 --> 0:01:25.400 from what about share. So let's just dive on in. 0:01:26.590 --> 0:01:32.170 First thing that I do before a difficult conversation, well, 0:01:32.170 --> 0:01:37.059 let's qualify what is a typical conversation? Confronting somebody on them, 0:01:37.060 --> 0:01:43.360 not doing something, following up with somebody when they missed 0:01:43.360 --> 0:01:50.980 the mark, when they did something entirely incorrectly. Uh. Talking 0:01:50.980 --> 0:01:54.040 to people who just are great people but aren't getting 0:01:54.040 --> 0:01:58.210 the results. Talking to people that you want to succeed, 0:01:58.210 --> 0:02:00.730 but they're not putting in the effort that they used 0:02:00.730 --> 0:02:03.400 to in order to get to where they want to go. 0:02:03.430 --> 0:02:07.420 There is no shortage of just different ways that you 0:02:07.420 --> 0:02:10.780 have to confront things as you're growing a business. And 0:02:10.780 --> 0:02:15.399 as I'm growing our business, as I'm focused on how 0:02:15.400 --> 0:02:18.730 do I keep communication in? I go back to the basics. 0:02:18.730 --> 0:02:21.250 I go back to the things that I know work, 0:02:22.210 --> 0:02:24.810 and these are them. So first thing that I do, 0:02:24.820 --> 0:02:28.840 we use this assessment. It's called the R3 assessment. And 0:02:28.840 --> 0:02:34.089 before anybody gets hired with us during the interview process, 0:02:34.090 --> 0:02:35.950 we actually have to take this assessment so that we 0:02:35.950 --> 0:02:38.980 know what there are. Three is ahead of time. You 0:02:38.980 --> 0:02:43.060 might be familiar with Myers-Briggs or risk assessment assessments of 0:02:43.060 --> 0:02:47.350 those sorts. This is similar but different. It's something that 0:02:47.350 --> 0:02:52.480 we spent at least half $1 million make eight uniquely 0:02:52.480 --> 0:02:56.560 ours modified editing a few years ago so that it 0:02:56.560 --> 0:03:01.389 really integrates well with the other business topics and business 0:03:01.389 --> 0:03:07.780 philosophies that we have. So this R3 assessment is invaluable 0:03:07.780 --> 0:03:14.019 because it shares the person's strengths, it shares a person's opportunities. 0:03:14.020 --> 0:03:17.410 And it also has this list of like do this 0:03:17.410 --> 0:03:21.700 and don't do this when communicating with this person. So 0:03:21.700 --> 0:03:23.829 when I'm going to have a difficult conversation with somebody, 0:03:23.830 --> 0:03:27.790 I'm going to look at their assessment and I can 0:03:27.790 --> 0:03:30.250 start to understand, okay, how are they going to want 0:03:30.250 --> 0:03:34.570 me to approach this conversation? I am what's called a 0:03:34.570 --> 0:03:38.800 high influencer. This is this was titled influencer before influencers 0:03:38.800 --> 0:03:41.530 became a thing. I'm not saying I am an influencer. 0:03:41.530 --> 0:03:44.110 I am literally saying through the assessment results I am 0:03:44.110 --> 0:03:47.680 an influencer, which means I love talking to people, being 0:03:47.680 --> 0:03:51.100 around people. I love social interactions. The more people, the better. 0:03:51.520 --> 0:03:53.860 I'm also a high driver, which means I want to 0:03:53.860 --> 0:03:56.500 get all of the tasks done as quickly as possible, 0:03:56.950 --> 0:04:00.880 and I essentially vacillate between those two. Well, if I 0:04:00.880 --> 0:04:02.830 have somebody that I'm talking to who is a high 0:04:02.830 --> 0:04:11.890 analyzer and wants details, data, facts, spreadsheets, charts, sometimes if 0:04:11.890 --> 0:04:14.980 I'm not careful, I can entirely shut that person down 0:04:14.980 --> 0:04:20.050 because I am up in visionary la la land and 0:04:20.050 --> 0:04:23.679 they're like, but wait, did you say it was about 25% 0:04:23.680 --> 0:04:26.049 or was it 23%? And they're hung up on some 0:04:26.050 --> 0:04:28.599 stat that didn't think it was important or material to 0:04:28.600 --> 0:04:34.719 the conversation, or I'm just rambling too much, like I 0:04:34.900 --> 0:04:39.339 host a podcast and I speak to people and I 0:04:39.339 --> 0:04:41.830 practically talk for a living. I do shit for a 0:04:41.830 --> 0:04:44.050 living too, but I talk for a living, so I 0:04:44.050 --> 0:04:47.380 have an ability to use words. I'll always say it 0:04:47.380 --> 0:04:51.610 that way. And if I'm talking to an analyzer, this 0:04:51.610 --> 0:04:54.460 might trigger them to just not get the best results. 0:04:54.460 --> 0:04:57.339 Or if I'm going to give them feedback about the 0:04:57.520 --> 0:05:01.960 spreadsheet or the the proposed structure that they sent over 0:05:01.960 --> 0:05:06.479 to me. If I'm not. Precise in the criticism that 0:05:06.480 --> 0:05:10.409 a gimme an upset spreadsheet. But forget about it. Like 0:05:10.500 --> 0:05:12.540 I'm going to send them so far into their basement, 0:05:12.540 --> 0:05:14.940 but they're not going to be able to hear my criticism. 0:05:14.940 --> 0:05:17.549 So when I look at this assessment and you can 0:05:17.550 --> 0:05:19.739 use different assessments in your business, if you're interested in 0:05:19.740 --> 0:05:23.400 using the R3, we do sell them and we can 0:05:23.400 --> 0:05:25.589 get you access to them. If you want to shoot 0:05:25.589 --> 0:05:29.310 us an email at info at Carto. I'm happy to 0:05:29.310 --> 0:05:31.320 get you set up. You and your team set up 0:05:31.320 --> 0:05:41.039 with assessments. But with the assessment is twofold. First, this 0:05:41.040 --> 0:05:46.360 assessment has already identified to the person where there's opportunity. 0:05:46.410 --> 0:05:49.950 So if you can understand what those opportunities are you 0:05:49.950 --> 0:05:52.140 have the leverage in this conversation. You know how they're 0:05:52.140 --> 0:05:53.880 going to respond. And if you know how somebody's going 0:05:53.880 --> 0:05:57.419 to respond, you can get a better outcome just by 0:05:57.420 --> 0:06:01.740 preparing yourself. The second thing that is so valuable is 0:06:01.740 --> 0:06:04.080 if you're in a leadership position or you're the business 0:06:04.080 --> 0:06:09.719 owner and you're navigating a difficult situation with a team member, 0:06:09.720 --> 0:06:14.850 you could actually use the R3 assessment to get agreement 0:06:14.850 --> 0:06:18.570 on what the area of opportunity is. So let's say 0:06:18.570 --> 0:06:22.260 what the person that I'm holding accountable, that they are 0:06:22.260 --> 0:06:25.589 withdrawing from bigger projects that I have to assign to 0:06:25.589 --> 0:06:28.500 because they aren't bought in due to me not going 0:06:28.500 --> 0:06:32.520 with their initial idea. If that was a conversation for 0:06:32.550 --> 0:06:35.010 that meeting, I would actually print out there are three 0:06:35.010 --> 0:06:38.909 assessment results, and I would ask them to circle or 0:06:38.910 --> 0:06:42.270 highlight the areas that they agree with and cross off 0:06:42.270 --> 0:06:44.550 the areas that they don't agree with in this assessment. 0:06:44.850 --> 0:06:47.580 So once I see what they agree with and it 0:06:47.580 --> 0:06:51.720 says that a challenge area of area that's problematic for 0:06:51.720 --> 0:06:54.830 them is that they withdraw when something isn't their idea. 0:06:54.839 --> 0:06:58.080 I can then use that as coaching, and I find 0:06:58.080 --> 0:07:02.489 that sometimes it's easier to hear something in a from 0:07:03.240 --> 0:07:06.719 almost somebody else than it is to just like take 0:07:06.720 --> 0:07:09.930 the criticism. And what I mean by somebody else would 0:07:09.930 --> 0:07:12.090 be like this assessment like they are already agree that 0:07:12.090 --> 0:07:14.850 this assessment is true. So they can recognize this might 0:07:14.850 --> 0:07:18.989 be a blind spot versus Natalie. Just saying in communication 0:07:18.990 --> 0:07:22.710 it's a blind spot of yours. So that agreement that 0:07:22.710 --> 0:07:26.790 you're getting with that person, I'm telling you it's unbelievably 0:07:26.790 --> 0:07:32.310 valuable in coaching people. One but then ultimately to getting 0:07:32.310 --> 0:07:36.180 the result that you're looking for. The next thing after 0:07:36.180 --> 0:07:40.350 getting access to their assessment, understanding what they value, what 0:07:40.350 --> 0:07:43.500 their challenges are, what their strengths are. I'm going to 0:07:43.500 --> 0:07:47.040 look at what their goals are, because if I can 0:07:47.370 --> 0:07:51.410 tie together how I know they're going to respond, aka 0:07:51.420 --> 0:07:55.560 R3 to where they want to go, I have the 0:07:55.560 --> 0:07:59.730 ultimate leverage in this conversation. If somebody is withdrawing, let's 0:07:59.730 --> 0:08:01.860 just use this example. This is a real life example. 0:08:01.860 --> 0:08:04.710 If somebody is withdrawing from a project that I determined 0:08:04.710 --> 0:08:07.140 is a priority for this organization, but I can tell 0:08:07.140 --> 0:08:12.420 that they're passing it. They aren't really helping the team out. 0:08:12.420 --> 0:08:16.230 They're missing deadlines. That would be problematic to begin with. 0:08:16.230 --> 0:08:20.190 But with most things like this, just as like a 0:08:20.190 --> 0:08:25.700 little small caveat with most projects. The project isn't actually 0:08:25.700 --> 0:08:30.140 that person's job. I think that person probably has some 0:08:30.140 --> 0:08:34.880 other function in your business a bookkeeper, a analyst, a controller, 0:08:34.880 --> 0:08:42.809 a CMO, a director of accounting, whatever their role is. 0:08:42.830 --> 0:08:46.550 So if they're missing things on a project, something that's new, 0:08:46.550 --> 0:08:50.060 something that you're asking them to work on, the the 0:08:50.059 --> 0:08:52.640 easy rationale from their standpoint is, oh, I'm just so 0:08:52.640 --> 0:08:56.449 busy doing my day to day job, the actual responsibilities 0:08:56.850 --> 0:08:59.930 of this role. And you could take that at face value, 0:08:59.929 --> 0:09:04.040 but I never do, and I don't, because those projects 0:09:04.040 --> 0:09:06.410 are the things that move our business forward. It's not 0:09:06.410 --> 0:09:09.410 what everybody is doing. If everybody just did what they 0:09:09.410 --> 0:09:12.400 were hired to do and only fulfilled on those activities, 0:09:12.410 --> 0:09:15.860 our business could not grow. Neither can your business. Your 0:09:15.860 --> 0:09:20.420 business cannot grow. If new projects and new initiatives aren't 0:09:20.420 --> 0:09:24.380 being brought into the fold today to build the future 0:09:24.380 --> 0:09:28.010 revenue streams, the future opportunities up tomorrow. And so when 0:09:28.010 --> 0:09:31.300 somebody checks out of these projects and they use the 0:09:31.340 --> 0:09:35.270 I'm so busy on these other things rationale when really, 0:09:35.270 --> 0:09:37.700 you know that it's because they didn't want this project 0:09:37.700 --> 0:09:40.070 to begin with or they didn't like the idea, or 0:09:40.070 --> 0:09:42.620 they had this other idea that you shot down, I'm 0:09:42.620 --> 0:09:45.230 going to take not just there are three, but also 0:09:45.230 --> 0:09:47.750 their goals. When they say that they want to be 0:09:47.750 --> 0:09:53.210 the vice president of finance or accounting or analysts, or 0:09:53.210 --> 0:09:54.890 they say that they want to make more money, or 0:09:54.890 --> 0:09:56.750 they want to develop these skills to be able to 0:09:56.750 --> 0:10:00.110 be a better leader. I can use that to say. 0:10:01.610 --> 0:10:04.520 Do you think it's a good leadership quality that you're 0:10:04.520 --> 0:10:08.360 not engaged in this project? You're demonstrating to everybody, even 0:10:08.360 --> 0:10:12.530 though you're already a leader and you're responsible, that you 0:10:12.530 --> 0:10:17.570 aren't really taking responsibility. But how does that align to 0:10:17.570 --> 0:10:21.560 you actually saying that you want to make more money 0:10:21.770 --> 0:10:26.510 and have greater responsibility in this organization, and all of 0:10:26.510 --> 0:10:30.530 a sudden you're like, oh, that's the core of the conversation. 0:10:30.710 --> 0:10:33.979 That's how you get the behavior to change. For them 0:10:33.980 --> 0:10:36.230 to understand that the way that they're acting, the way 0:10:36.230 --> 0:10:39.890 that they're engaging right now, the issue that's present is 0:10:39.890 --> 0:10:42.589 stopping them from getting to where they want to go. 0:10:42.920 --> 0:10:45.740 It's it's not helping them. It's not taking them to 0:10:45.740 --> 0:10:47.750 the next level. It's not them showing up as their best. 0:10:47.750 --> 0:10:51.290 They're choosing to cop an attitude. They're choosing to be problematic. 0:10:51.290 --> 0:10:54.410 You're trying to get them not to have an attitude 0:10:54.410 --> 0:10:57.320 and not to be problematic without saying stop having an 0:10:57.320 --> 0:11:00.020 attitude and stop being problematic is how well is that 0:11:00.020 --> 0:11:02.690 going to work? Walk into a meeting along with somebody. 0:11:02.690 --> 0:11:04.910 Be like, you're being problematic. I could tell you have 0:11:04.910 --> 0:11:06.439 a bad attitude about this. You need to have a 0:11:06.440 --> 0:11:09.680 better attitude. Kind of reminds me of like being a 0:11:09.679 --> 0:11:13.640 kid wanting to have a cookie and your parents say 0:11:13.640 --> 0:11:15.920 no and you ask why? And they say, because I 0:11:15.920 --> 0:11:18.410 said so. That's how it feels to your team members 0:11:18.410 --> 0:11:21.170 when you just say you're being problematic or you are 0:11:21.170 --> 0:11:25.310 just playing this issue, it doesn't really help that because 0:11:25.309 --> 0:11:28.069 then they're just pissed that you're telling them that they're problematic. 0:11:28.070 --> 0:11:30.140 It's going to compound the issue, or you're trying to 0:11:30.140 --> 0:11:32.690 get is a different result. So you're going to communicate 0:11:32.690 --> 0:11:35.360 with them in a way. In this particular case, I'm 0:11:35.360 --> 0:11:37.280 going to show them there are three show them that 0:11:37.280 --> 0:11:40.100 it says, hey, you withdraw when is by your idea 0:11:40.100 --> 0:11:43.099 and then type, oh, why is that a problem? Well, 0:11:43.100 --> 0:11:45.530 you said that you want to be over this entire team. 0:11:45.530 --> 0:11:47.360 How can I trust that you are going to be 0:11:47.360 --> 0:11:50.630 able to be over this entire team if you're negative 0:11:50.630 --> 0:11:52.820 and withdrawn and products that you don't want to do. 0:11:52.820 --> 0:11:55.339 Let me ask you another question. Would you allow your 0:11:55.340 --> 0:11:59.990 team members in the future to. Withdraw and be negative 0:11:59.990 --> 0:12:03.890 on projects, but you are asking them to help move 0:12:03.890 --> 0:12:08.230 forward with and they probably go, no, said I. That's 0:12:08.390 --> 0:12:13.190 what I want to do. So super, super helpful tools 0:12:13.190 --> 0:12:18.830 goals always. And then this R3 assessment for game changer. 0:12:18.920 --> 0:12:25.280 I go into so much detail about this in. But twice. First, 0:12:25.280 --> 0:12:28.790 my book called teamwork. If you go to carnivorous.com for teamwork, 0:12:28.970 --> 0:12:32.000 get a free copy that I will send to you. 0:12:32.000 --> 0:12:34.880 You will pay for shipping, but get yourself a free copy. 0:12:35.000 --> 0:12:40.490 Invaluable as it relates to confronting difficult conversations and really 0:12:40.580 --> 0:12:44.240 guiding and building a high performance team. And then the 0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:47.150 other place is a People Essentials workshop. The book is 0:12:47.150 --> 0:12:50.390 one thing, but going through this, doing role plays and 0:12:50.390 --> 0:12:53.449 having these one on one interactions with me and our 0:12:53.450 --> 0:12:57.860 team in person. If your business is doing over $1 0:12:57.860 --> 0:13:01.670 million in annual revenue, get the book. But also come 0:13:01.670 --> 0:13:04.880 be this person, because this is just the tip of 0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:07.580 the iceberg as it relates to the people developing the 0:13:07.580 --> 0:13:12.469 content that I have. So part three on this. One 0:13:12.470 --> 0:13:16.670 of my favorite ways to communicate is through the vision, 0:13:16.670 --> 0:13:23.600 commitment and execution framework called A, B, C, E vision 0:13:23.630 --> 0:13:27.709 commitment execution. So how this works is I'm going to 0:13:27.710 --> 0:13:30.260 enter a meeting. I've already prepped myself ahead of time 0:13:30.260 --> 0:13:34.550 with what their goals are and their preferred communication style 0:13:34.550 --> 0:13:39.200 through process through the R three. Then I have to 0:13:39.200 --> 0:13:42.430 actually flush out what the ask is of this medium. 0:13:42.470 --> 0:13:44.900 Like what am I actually trying to get out of 0:13:44.900 --> 0:13:49.160 this conversation? So most people just go right into it 0:13:49.160 --> 0:13:54.680 and they start sharing why they're upset, how difficult things 0:13:54.679 --> 0:13:59.180 have been, all the problems. That's just you start the 0:13:59.179 --> 0:14:01.850 meeting up wrong. That's going to put somebody at the defensive, 0:14:02.330 --> 0:14:05.990 that's going to put them feeling like they're being challenged. 0:14:05.990 --> 0:14:07.699 And then you guys are going back and forth in 0:14:07.700 --> 0:14:10.969 a debate. I just want to tell you this. You 0:14:10.970 --> 0:14:14.420 do not want to debate your team members. There is 0:14:14.420 --> 0:14:16.890 no ideal scene where you are one on one with 0:14:16.890 --> 0:14:18.440 the team member, and you guys are going back and 0:14:18.440 --> 0:14:21.860 forth about something that you're bringing up. That's a personal 0:14:21.860 --> 0:14:25.820 issue or shortcoming. And you guys are like going toe 0:14:25.820 --> 0:14:29.420 to toe on this development area. Now, I'm good with 0:14:29.420 --> 0:14:32.960 going toe to toe and debating about ideas and products 0:14:32.960 --> 0:14:35.660 and finding to win for our customers, like, give me 0:14:35.660 --> 0:14:37.850 those debates all day long. But when it comes to 0:14:37.850 --> 0:14:42.080 somebody in their behavior and their competency in their role, 0:14:42.080 --> 0:14:44.960 I'm not trying to debate or put somebody on the defensive. 0:14:44.960 --> 0:14:46.700 I'm trying to get them to understand that I see 0:14:46.700 --> 0:14:48.800 this blind spot and I need them to see it, too. 0:14:48.800 --> 0:14:50.359 And we need to figure out how to work on 0:14:50.360 --> 0:14:54.410 this or else it's not going to work. So the 0:14:54.410 --> 0:14:59.120 framework BCE vision, commitment, execution. I'm going to start with, okay, 0:14:59.120 --> 0:15:01.700 why are we even having this conversation? The why is 0:15:01.700 --> 0:15:05.870 always tied to their goals. The why is always tied 0:15:05.870 --> 0:15:08.720 to their goals. The vision of the conversation is to 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:12.440 get them and the organization closer to your goals. Now 0:15:12.440 --> 0:15:14.990 you can get really specific around this depending on what 0:15:14.990 --> 0:15:18.260 their goals are, as you should like. It should just be. 0:15:18.260 --> 0:15:20.570 I want to help you achieve your goals and I 0:15:20.570 --> 0:15:23.030 want the organization to achieve its goals. That's not like 0:15:23.030 --> 0:15:26.930 a check. Good job on vision. It would be more specific. Hey, 0:15:26.930 --> 0:15:29.810 I understand that becoming a vice president of our accounting 0:15:29.810 --> 0:15:32.270 department is really important to you. That's still important to 0:15:32.270 --> 0:15:35.780 you and that you get there by it. Yes, it 0:15:35.780 --> 0:15:38.300 is important to me. Or they could say no and 0:15:38.300 --> 0:15:42.530 then you have that conversation. But I'm establishing the vision. Okay? 0:15:42.530 --> 0:15:46.550 If being the vice president of accounting is important to you, 0:15:47.180 --> 0:15:50.120 I want to make sure that I'm helping you see. 0:15:51.130 --> 0:15:56.290 Areas of opportunity that will have to be addressed before 0:15:56.290 --> 0:15:59.470 I can consider putting you in that position, because that 0:15:59.470 --> 0:16:02.050 position is very important to the organization, and I know 0:16:02.050 --> 0:16:04.000 it's very important to you, and I'd be remiss if 0:16:04.000 --> 0:16:06.670 I didn't share with you these things that I've seen 0:16:06.670 --> 0:16:10.570 that hurt your ability to actually get to where you 0:16:10.570 --> 0:16:13.180 want to go. Do you think you have that person's 0:16:13.180 --> 0:16:17.800 attention at that moment? You sure do. So that's the vision. 0:16:18.160 --> 0:16:19.480 You're trying to help them get to where they want 0:16:19.480 --> 0:16:25.570 to go. Now, in that the next step would be 0:16:26.680 --> 0:16:31.510 your commitment. So how are you committed to helping that 0:16:31.510 --> 0:16:35.680 person improve and how are they committed to actually improving 0:16:36.580 --> 0:16:39.760 the vision you've shared? Okay. Why are we having this conversation? 0:16:39.760 --> 0:16:42.790 Why is this important? The commitment you're saying, hey, I'm 0:16:42.790 --> 0:16:44.890 willing to invest in you. I'm willing to give you 0:16:44.890 --> 0:16:48.400 these opportunities. I'm willing to spend time role playing with you, 0:16:48.400 --> 0:16:50.200 whatever it is that you're willing to do, and then 0:16:50.200 --> 0:16:52.990 you're also asking them to detail out what they are 0:16:52.990 --> 0:16:55.840 willing to commit to in order to get better. Oh, 0:16:55.840 --> 0:16:57.520 I'm going to take a journal of every single time 0:16:57.520 --> 0:16:59.500 I feel like I'm withdrawing, and I'm going to write 0:16:59.500 --> 0:17:03.130 down to myself, I am ten, and then I'm going 0:17:03.130 --> 0:17:04.609 to snap out of it and I'm going to like, 0:17:04.660 --> 0:17:07.990 rejoin with enthusiasm. Okay, great. That's one of their commitments. 0:17:08.619 --> 0:17:12.250 And then from their execution, what are the blocking and 0:17:12.250 --> 0:17:14.290 tackling that needs to take place in order for this 0:17:14.290 --> 0:17:17.920 issue to be improved? Now, this is just a framework 0:17:17.920 --> 0:17:21.190 that I'm using to prepare myself for this conversation. So 0:17:21.190 --> 0:17:24.850 I don't come in hot and heavy and maybe even 0:17:24.850 --> 0:17:30.310 flustered or all over the place like it's very clearly stated. 0:17:30.609 --> 0:17:33.220 Oh yeah, this is why I'm getting by and I'm 0:17:33.220 --> 0:17:37.209 connecting with the importance of this at the get. That's 0:17:37.210 --> 0:17:40.480 the vision. And then we're moving into, okay, where are 0:17:40.480 --> 0:17:42.370 you committed to in order to make this happen? Are 0:17:42.369 --> 0:17:44.830 you committed to make these changes? Some people might look 0:17:44.830 --> 0:17:47.350 at you and say, you know, I can't do what 0:17:47.350 --> 0:17:49.450 you're asking me to do. This just happened to me 0:17:50.260 --> 0:17:52.900 about two months ago. I realized that I was allowing 0:17:52.900 --> 0:17:56.770 somebody who was working close to me to have half 0:17:56.770 --> 0:18:00.070 the output as other team members, and I started to 0:18:00.070 --> 0:18:03.400 do this individual's job because I wasn't trusting of them 0:18:03.400 --> 0:18:07.330 and I wasn't confident in their ability to execute. So 0:18:07.330 --> 0:18:09.970 I sat down and I said, listen, come Monday, I 0:18:09.970 --> 0:18:13.419 know it's Friday right now. Come Monday, my intention is 0:18:13.420 --> 0:18:19.990 to expect out of you what the job description states. 0:18:19.990 --> 0:18:22.660 We hired you to do this role. You're doing this 0:18:22.660 --> 0:18:27.850 role at half output. That is not acceptable. And I 0:18:27.850 --> 0:18:30.520 cannot tolerate this any longer in this role because it's 0:18:30.520 --> 0:18:34.240 affecting my ability to do my job. And I'm paying 0:18:34.240 --> 0:18:37.419 you to do the full job. So my expectations are 0:18:37.420 --> 0:18:39.700 not only not being met, but you're not going over 0:18:39.700 --> 0:18:42.490 and above my expectations. This is a problem for me. 0:18:42.700 --> 0:18:44.889 So I want you to take the weekend, and I 0:18:44.890 --> 0:18:47.530 want you to think about if you are willing to 0:18:47.530 --> 0:18:52.030 put in the effort and energy to become better at 0:18:52.030 --> 0:18:55.929 these five very specific things. Or if you'd like to 0:18:55.930 --> 0:18:58.870 figure out how a transition plan can work, and we 0:18:58.869 --> 0:19:01.150 will support you in a transition, and we'll figure out 0:19:01.630 --> 0:19:04.780 how to make this go as smoothly as possible. And 0:19:05.619 --> 0:19:09.040 what comes around for team member says, I don't think 0:19:09.040 --> 0:19:11.680 that I can give this job anymore than I currently am. 0:19:11.680 --> 0:19:17.110 I have other priorities right now and this isn't working 0:19:17.109 --> 0:19:22.330 for me. Okay, great. Find the next person. We replace 0:19:22.330 --> 0:19:25.390 this person. And two and a half weeks. I still 0:19:25.390 --> 0:19:28.420 have great affinity for this person. Like it's not that 0:19:28.420 --> 0:19:31.660 this person's a bad person, they just weren't fulfilling the expectation. 0:19:31.660 --> 0:19:34.810 I've since backfilled the role and the new person is 0:19:34.810 --> 0:19:38.410 kicking ass in the role, so everybody wins. A new 0:19:38.410 --> 0:19:42.790 person gets to come into the organization and be valued, 0:19:42.790 --> 0:19:47.080 and I get the value out of what I paid 0:19:47.080 --> 0:19:51.010 to have this role support me, and the previous team 0:19:51.010 --> 0:19:53.320 member gets to go do something that's more in alignment 0:19:53.320 --> 0:19:55.870 with what their priorities are. That is a win win. 0:19:55.869 --> 0:20:01.840 That is not a problem. So framing that conversation using vision, commitment, 0:20:01.840 --> 0:20:05.560 execution means that I didn't just go in there and 0:20:05.560 --> 0:20:08.530 was like all over the place and super sloppy and 0:20:08.530 --> 0:20:12.100 rambling on and on and not being specific. I was 0:20:12.100 --> 0:20:14.920 very specific. Are you willing to do what is going 0:20:14.920 --> 0:20:17.770 to require. I'm willing to tell you what is required. 0:20:17.770 --> 0:20:19.810 Are you willing to do those things? Yes or no? 0:20:19.900 --> 0:20:21.369 You could think about it. Let me know. I'm not 0:20:21.369 --> 0:20:26.740 that super clear. The more clear you are in difficult conversations, 0:20:27.100 --> 0:20:29.770 the more success you are going to have when having 0:20:29.770 --> 0:20:34.149 the conversation. With that, I hope you enjoyed this episode 0:20:34.150 --> 0:20:38.080 of Building Billions. If you haven't yet, give Building Billions 0:20:38.080 --> 0:20:41.350 a share. I love seeing your stories on Instagram, on 0:20:41.350 --> 0:20:45.729 Tik Tok, on LinkedIn, all the places would love to 0:20:45.730 --> 0:20:49.270 have you share this content. That is how this podcast grows, 0:20:49.270 --> 0:20:52.419 I appreciate you. For doing that and look forward to 0:20:52.420 --> 0:20:53.620 connecting next time.