Speaker 1: It's the Mojo in the morning show. So Anna, I
Speaker 1: drove you into therapy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Mojo, it's all your fault.
Speaker 3: I since starting this job, Mojo has been more than
Speaker 3: just a boss or somebody that I work with. I
Speaker 3: actually confide in Mojo and all of you in a
Speaker 3: lot of personal things. And what I've realized through these
Speaker 3: conversations is that my entire life, how I deal with
Speaker 3: things that bother me is I just avoid them. If
Speaker 3: somebody bothers me, if a situation bothers me, I just
Speaker 3: avoid it. I don't want to talk about it. I
Speaker 3: don't want to see those people that are hurting me.
Speaker 3: I just sort of write them off. But Mojo has
Speaker 3: been pushing me to not do that and to sort
Speaker 3: of like confront these things, get over these things, because
Speaker 3: life is short, whether that's a person or whatever it is.
Speaker 2: So I decided to start therapy.
Speaker 3: I had sort of like a rough Thanksgiving and I
Speaker 3: left feeling a little bit sad. So I made an
Speaker 3: appointment with my therapist, well new therapist. I had one
Speaker 3: appointment so far. I was supposed to have one yesterday,
Speaker 3: but I canceled it because I was too tired. And
Speaker 3: interestingly enough my therapist had a little bit of a
Speaker 3: different take than Mojo.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's you know what.
Speaker 1: And I think that's the reason why you go talk
Speaker 1: to somebody who is because it gives you an opportunity to,
Speaker 1: uh get a different perspective. And I will say this
Speaker 1: to you. You don't always use a perspective of what
Speaker 1: the therapist gives you, but you use the perspectives of
Speaker 1: those around you.
Speaker 3: So I don't want to get too into, like the
Speaker 3: details of what my issues are, but essentially, there's some
Speaker 3: people in my life that I struggle to be around,
Speaker 3: and Mojo is pushing me to be around them more. However,
Speaker 3: when I talk to my therapist, this is what they
Speaker 3: This is how they phrased it to me, as like, yes,
Speaker 3: it would be great to have them in your life,
Speaker 3: but let's say this was like, it's not an abusive situation,
Speaker 3: but let's say this was an abusive situation where these
Speaker 3: people were physically abusing you every time you saw them
Speaker 3: and you left hurt. Would you keep going back to
Speaker 3: them every time? And I'm sorry, I'm getting emotional, like, no,
Speaker 3: I wouldn't keep putting myself back in those situations, even
Speaker 3: if it's not physical abuse, like mentally, it's really hurting me.
Speaker 3: So she's saying, like, maybe you do just need to
Speaker 3: totally remove yourself from those situations until you're better.
Speaker 4: Mm hmmm.
Speaker 2: Particularly so, yeah.
Speaker 3: I'm in therapy now and that's sort of what I'm
Speaker 3: dealing with. But it was interesting because again, like with Mota,
Speaker 3: he's like, these people that are hurting you, they're not
Speaker 3: going to be around forever.
Speaker 1: Like no, no, no, let me explain myself because I
Speaker 1: wanted you to know my thing was my thing was
Speaker 1: exactly what you're doing. And I said you should go
Speaker 1: and talk to a therapist about it, because when they
Speaker 1: aren't around, you don't want it to back and be
Speaker 1: one of those things where you wish that.
Speaker 4: You would have.
Speaker 1: I don't believe that you need to have people in
Speaker 1: your life that are emotionally or more importantly physically, but
Speaker 1: emotional is just as physical.
Speaker 4: It's hurtful as it's abused that be around.
Speaker 1: But I do think that you need to talk to
Speaker 1: somebody about where where they are in your life and
Speaker 1: where you are.
Speaker 5: I think that's the biggest part, regardless of the healing
Speaker 5: that may or may not take place between you and
Speaker 5: whoever these people are. It's the individual healing that needs
Speaker 5: to take place inside of you. For you, we're not
Speaker 5: trying to mend any relationship but the one you have
Speaker 5: with the inner Anna and not pushing things like jay Z.
Speaker 5: One of my favorite jay Z albums four four four,
Speaker 5: the first song is called kill jay Z because he
Speaker 5: had to kill this persona of who he was. And
Speaker 5: one of the things that he said was you can't
Speaker 5: heal what you are willing to reveal. And sometimes like
Speaker 5: the clean room, if you're going everything you know, I'm saying,
Speaker 5: if I'm throwing all my trash in the closet, the
Speaker 5: room's not really clean.
Speaker 4: I'm just hiding and what.
Speaker 6: Progress I can see for one session because I feel
Speaker 6: like you and we don't know you that well yet,
Speaker 6: but you do tend to keep things close to yourself.
Speaker 6: So even like you talking about this and getting emotional
Speaker 6: and that's like it's getting it out and putting it
Speaker 6: on the table and then figuring out what to do
Speaker 6: with it is how I always think about it in
Speaker 6: my brain with therapy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and I think I'm like really just trying to
Speaker 3: get a place like I don't even think that I've
Speaker 3: expressed how I've I've been feeling to these people that
Speaker 3: are hurting me. So right now my therapist is like,
Speaker 3: we just need to get you comfortable so you can
Speaker 3: tell them like, this is how you're making me feel,
Speaker 3: this is how you're hurting me, and I'll have to
Speaker 3: step back if it continues. But like, I'm not even
Speaker 3: comfortable doing that.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you that that makes me feel really good?
Speaker 1: Because I didn't do that.
Speaker 4: And my.
Speaker 1: Level of giving you any advice that I've given you
Speaker 1: and I have not said you need to do this.
Speaker 1: My thing was you may want to do this, and
Speaker 1: I don't think by the way that you are going
Speaker 1: to do your NET therapy is not going to help
Speaker 1: you get over anything. I just want you to know
Speaker 1: that it's going to help you cope with things. I
Speaker 1: will say this to you. My thing was with my dad.
Speaker 1: I had a lot of things in my life that
Speaker 1: I used to let my dad get away with that
Speaker 1: I never said to him while he was on this earth,
Speaker 1: And what ended up affecting me was when he died,
Speaker 1: it put more of a burden than the things that
Speaker 1: he had done to me or I thought he had
Speaker 1: done to me on me when he died because I
Speaker 1: got angry towards him when he died. Instead of feeling
Speaker 1: sad for the fact that I lost my father, I
Speaker 1: was angry about it. And so I think what happened
Speaker 1: with my therapy that I went through was I was
Speaker 1: going to therapy because I didn't want anything that my
Speaker 1: dad did to me to be passed on to my boys,
Speaker 1: and so I was trying to stop the generational hurt
Speaker 1: that was going on.
Speaker 4: What I found was I was putting.
Speaker 1: An unrealistic burden on things that happened in my life
Speaker 1: on one person, my dad, And it was not necessarily
Speaker 1: my dad's fault. That things happened in my life was
Speaker 1: life's fault. And what I was doing was looking at
Speaker 1: the way that he, as a person was dealing with
Speaker 1: his pain too. And I think what I hope for
Speaker 1: you with your therapist. First off, you got to make
Speaker 1: sure you tell your therapist the truth. Because I went
Speaker 1: through about six months of BS and my therapist and
Speaker 1: making things very much making me look better and making
Speaker 1: them look worse. And my therapist, Dennis, by the way,
Speaker 1: shout out to you. Dennis started realizing I wasn't telling
Speaker 1: him the truth, and he said, all right, we're going
Speaker 1: to have a talk here right now. I don't necessarily
Speaker 1: think that you're giving me one hundred percent of what's
Speaker 1: going on. And can I tell you something. It changed
Speaker 1: me because you know what it did. It healed my
Speaker 1: relationship with my dad.
Speaker 2: But it was after your dad.
Speaker 4: Way after my dad died.
Speaker 1: So I and I wish I met Dennis and went
Speaker 1: to therapy and somebody had told me about I was
Speaker 1: going to therapy already, but I wasn't talking about my dad.
Speaker 1: But I wish I would have been able to talk
Speaker 1: to my dad about Hey, Dad, tell me what you're
Speaker 1: going through, you know, tell me about your pain, because
Speaker 1: you don't realize that they're going through it too.
Speaker 5: Everybody got a story. I say two things. I think
Speaker 5: one thing I forgot the second thing, but I think
Speaker 5: sometimes I had. But I think, like I don't want
Speaker 5: to use the word accountability, but sometimes people don't know
Speaker 5: how they're affecting us, and if we just let things go,
Speaker 5: then they won't ever realize that they are actually hurting us.
Speaker 5: And I would say that obviously there will be stages,
Speaker 5: and there's a process, like Shannon mention, even you getting
Speaker 5: here is a step in that, right direction. But I
Speaker 5: think before you totally cut ties, like you have to
Speaker 5: find it in yourself to let them.
Speaker 4: Know how it is effect and let them know why
Speaker 4: you're settings.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm working on, Kelly.
Speaker 4: What's going on is mojo in the morning.
Speaker 7: I know, I just wanted the first compliment and applaud
Speaker 7: Anna for going to therapy, because I don't think people
Speaker 7: understand it's very difficult to confront things that are hard
Speaker 7: to talk about, especially when it comes to family, and
Speaker 7: therapy forces you to kind of have to be very,
Speaker 7: very vulnerable about things that you've maybe been keeping close
Speaker 7: to your heart like you have, Anna. And then number
Speaker 7: two was just talking about confronting people.
Speaker 8: Or confronting situations instead of hiding them. But what your
Speaker 8: therapist said.
Speaker 7: Was so profound because your peace is yours to protect
Speaker 7: and a lot of people don't realize.
Speaker 8: That, Like, it's your life and it's your peace. So
Speaker 8: if that means, hey.
Speaker 7: Like this person is affecting me and my life.
Speaker 8: And sometimes confronting them is not the answer because.
Speaker 7: It almost makes it worse because they don't they don't
Speaker 7: have that accountability, like what Kevin just said, So your
Speaker 7: peace is, hey, like this person is really difficult to
Speaker 7: be around or make me really upset when I'm around them,
Speaker 7: and that's affecting my peace.
Speaker 8: The best choice for me is to just remove myself
Speaker 8: or not be present around this person, or I just
Speaker 8: kind of pick.
Speaker 4: And choose where I want.
Speaker 8: Them in my life because it's you. It's your life
Speaker 8: to protect, and it's your peace to protect.
Speaker 7: So I just applaud you for taking those steps to
Speaker 7: be able to go talk to somebody about all the things.
Speaker 7: Life brings a lot of.
Speaker 8: Things, So applause to you.
Speaker 4: You know what.
Speaker 1: I love that we talk on the show about therapy
Speaker 1: a lot because I think that there are some listeners
Speaker 1: that are told that when you go to therapy you're nuts,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, or or your.
Speaker 6: Week's not That's an old stigma that I'm so happy
Speaker 6: is has gone by by, and I.
Speaker 1: Think there's other people that are like I can't afford therapy.
Speaker 1: I think that there's ways that you can actually get
Speaker 1: to therapy. I know that there's a lot of things
Speaker 1: you cannot afford, but I think that there are ways
Speaker 1: that you can get it, and it's just a matter
Speaker 1: of you taking me the extra steps and effort to
Speaker 1: go find the ability to be able to to get
Speaker 1: somebody that can can give you therapy.
Speaker 5: And if you have a job, sometimes go to your
Speaker 5: HR because it's like a part of your if it's right,
Speaker 5: like for for the freezy content.
Speaker 4: What's going on? Frank, Hey, good morning guys.
Speaker 9: Anna.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry you're going through this, and I'm so happy
Speaker 3: you're seeing a therapist and Mojo.
Speaker 4: I just want to tell you something.
Speaker 3: About your dad.
Speaker 4: It's pretty cool. But people know to forget that it
Speaker 4: was it's their first time as well whatever they were
Speaker 4: going through. So and I learned that through therapy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, every child thinks that parents, parents know everything, but
Speaker 3: it's their first time as well dealing with you.
Speaker 1: Listen, I never I never took into accounts the pain
Speaker 1: that my dad had gone through, you know. But I
Speaker 1: also I'm not going to let that be the reason why,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm going to be okay with him doing it.
Speaker 1: Same with your parents, your parents or family or whoever
Speaker 1: it is that you're talking about. They you have to
Speaker 1: understand everybody comes from a sense of being hurt, but
Speaker 1: you should not have They should not pass that hurt
Speaker 1: onto you. They need to go see seek help to
Speaker 1: to help them that Aaron, what's going on?
Speaker 9: Hey Monjoe, how are you?
Speaker 1: I'm okay, and we're happy for Anna asking how she's doing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, good job.
Speaker 7: Anna.
Speaker 9: I'm so happy for stuffing into therapy. And I think
Speaker 9: it's a great place where you can have a safe
Speaker 9: space to own your story. And I just identify with
Speaker 9: the other color saying protect your peace and emotional abuse
Speaker 9: is sometimes way more damming than physical abuse. So just
Speaker 9: really take this time to own your story and learn
Speaker 9: how to set some good boundaries with family. You can
Speaker 9: do it.
Speaker 2: Thank you for the encouragement.
Speaker 4: Hey, Samantha, what's up. It's Mojo in the morning.
Speaker 8: Hello.
Speaker 4: Hello.
Speaker 10: I'm very proud of Anna for going to therapy. I
Speaker 10: don't have insurance, so I was not able to go
Speaker 10: to therapy. But I understand where she's coming from. I
Speaker 10: grew up with a mother who never gave compliments. It
Speaker 10: was always oh, you should have done it this way,
Speaker 10: or if you would have done this, it would have
Speaker 10: been better. I was never told that she was proud
Speaker 10: of me. I was never told that I did a
Speaker 10: good job. And my dad wasn't around because he was
Speaker 10: either cheating on my mom or busy drinking it was hard.
Speaker 10: I was very angry for a long time, but I
Speaker 10: worked through my issues because I realized that my parents,
Speaker 10: I don't feel like we're necessarily doing it on purpose
Speaker 10: to hurt me. I feel like they were raised a
Speaker 10: certain way by their parents, and then they chose to
Speaker 10: raise me that same way, not realizing, like you said,
Speaker 10: how they had been treated and what was done to
Speaker 10: them emotionally, and then they were reflecting it back on me.
Speaker 10: So I had to make the decision to cut both
Speaker 10: of my parents off so that way I didn't allow
Speaker 10: them to mess with my children the way that they messed.
Speaker 4: With my brain.
Speaker 1: Hey, Samantha, I know you say you don't have the
Speaker 1: job to get therapy. Google that circum circumstance and there
Speaker 1: will be resources for you that will come up of
Speaker 1: how you can get therapy.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right.
Speaker 1: I learned this from my son, who is a therapist,
Speaker 1: who is a doctor of psychology now, and I'm very
Speaker 1: proud of him. But because I said to him, I go,
Speaker 1: not every I actually use that as one thing, Well,
Speaker 1: not everybody can you know, can afford therapy? And he's like,
Speaker 1: there are there are no resources. The problem is and
Speaker 1: this is the thing is a lot of times we
Speaker 1: don't google or go the extra step, even though it
Speaker 1: would really help us out, because sometimes we don't want
Speaker 1: to know like and we want to use that as
Speaker 1: the excuse. I want to talk more about Anna here.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you something about this, this unbelievable woman
Speaker 1: that's in front of us right now. You took this job,
Speaker 1: and you took it thinking to yourself. And I know
Speaker 1: this firsthand. You took it thinking to yourself, Oh, that
Speaker 1: it's gonna be a great way to propel my career.
Speaker 1: I think this this job, in meeting the people that
Speaker 1: you're around, including these listeners that are calling, I think
Speaker 1: this job is going to propel you as a person.
Speaker 2: I think so too, boy and I and.
Speaker 4: I honestly, can I tell you this.
Speaker 1: I thought that when I first saw you and knew
Speaker 1: about you, I knew that there were a lot of
Speaker 1: people that could have come in here and been part
Speaker 1: of this show that probably were at even a level
Speaker 1: a little higher than you. I thought that this job
Speaker 1: was going to be a huge benefit to our show.
Speaker 1: I thought it was gonna be a huge benefit to you.
Speaker 1: And I think a lot of times we don't look
Speaker 1: at it that way. When we're going for jobs or
Speaker 1: looking for people. And I think that's huge. And I
Speaker 1: realized this the other night at jingle Ball. I was
Speaker 1: the happiest I've ever been at a jingle ball the
Speaker 1: other night. It was the happiest. My outfit fit me.
Speaker 1: But also I liked being around the people that I
Speaker 1: was around. Every person that was with there was having
Speaker 1: the time of their lives. We were sitting in we
Speaker 1: were in that one room, the interview room with EJ
Speaker 1: up there on there, and we were amongst a group
Speaker 1: of a bunch of people, and every single person that
Speaker 1: was in that room had a smile or some kind
Speaker 1: of a thing on them. You know that that made
Speaker 1: him feel And it was because the group that were
Speaker 1: around and you, you are a huge reason for that.
Speaker 1: So I appreciate you and I love you. And do
Speaker 1: not cancel your next therapy.
Speaker 4: Plinner Friday Friday, Friday, Friday Friday. Don't miss it.