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Speaker 1: This is a podcast from dou Wor. Here again is

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Speaker 1: Larry Minty with the WOR Saturday morning show. Welcome back.

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Speaker 1: Did you know that HR specialist Greg g and Grande

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Speaker 1: will answer your questions at go to Greg dot com.

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Speaker 1: This week, Greg got two questions about bosses that play

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Speaker 1: favorites and co workers who share way too much about

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Speaker 1: their personal lives in the workplace. Greg is here to

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Speaker 1: tell us how to handle those workplace dilemmas. And so

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Speaker 1: you're ready, Greg, I'm just going to read a couple

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Speaker 1: of these.

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Speaker 2: I'm ready, Larry. Let me first say sure that you

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Speaker 2: are my favorite radio host. Now go ahead with your

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Speaker 2: first question.

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Speaker 1: What brought that on? Exactly?

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Speaker 2: Well, it relates to your first question.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, here we go. I work on a team

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Speaker 1: where our manager clearly plays favorites. Certain colleagues consistently get

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Speaker 1: the best assignments, more praise, and more flexibility. It's starting

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Speaker 1: to affect morale. I'm torn between speaking up or staying silent.

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Speaker 1: What can I do without making things worse? And that

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Speaker 1: comes from your favorite radio host?

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Speaker 2: Yes, exactly, and that was one of my points. Let's

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Speaker 2: face it. The truth is that, like many teachers have pets.

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Speaker 2: Many bosses do have their favorites, and that can be

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Speaker 2: a result of several factors. It could be just sucking

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Speaker 2: up like I was to you, Larry, but it actually

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Speaker 2: happens to give the truth. Or it can be great

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Speaker 2: chemistry that you happen to have with your boss, or

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Speaker 2: frequently it's really because that person demonstrates great job performance

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Speaker 2: and they make the boss's life easier. The boss can

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Speaker 2: always count on them. Now, a good boss shouldn't let

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Speaker 2: others feel like there is a favorite, but sometimes it's

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Speaker 2: hard to hide. And maybe none of those factors are

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Speaker 2: at play in your relationship with your boss or how

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Speaker 2: your boss views you. So what can you do well?

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Speaker 2: The person who wrote in said, should they remain silent?

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Speaker 2: Remaining silent is the best way to ensure that you

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Speaker 2: remain unhappy. So you have to do something because unhappiness

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Speaker 2: at work only leads to more resentment. As this person

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Speaker 2: said that it's affecting morale, and when your morale is affected,

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Speaker 2: then it affects your performance. So at the end of

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Speaker 2: the day, you're having an adverse impact on yourself more

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Speaker 2: than you are on a company. By staying silent and

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Speaker 2: just building up this resentment, So you do need to

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Speaker 2: say something, But speaking up and accusing your boss of

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Speaker 2: unfairness and playing favorite, that's not typically a good career

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Speaker 2: strategy either for success.

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Speaker 1: You're not going to become his favorite. That way no strategy.

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Speaker 2: But you know, if you speak to you, if you

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Speaker 2: ask to speak to your boss privately, and don't make

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Speaker 2: it about something your boss is or isn't doing, or

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Speaker 2: someone else, but about you and your career ambitions and

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Speaker 2: your desire to do more on the team and more

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Speaker 2: for the boss to take on more and higher work,

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Speaker 2: and asking for feedback about what you do well and

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Speaker 2: what your boss thinks you can do better and how

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Speaker 2: you can get better at it. It makes your boss

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Speaker 2: vested in your growth and development, which can improve the

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Speaker 2: relationship because now you're asking for their feedback and their

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Speaker 2: advice and their their you know, mentorship in a way.

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Speaker 2: And so that's one way to improve your situation. It's

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Speaker 2: also a way to find out if there's an issue

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Speaker 2: with your performance that your boss feels and maybe that's

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Speaker 2: why you're feeling kind of left out. But the only

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Speaker 2: way to improve this is actually to say something, and

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Speaker 2: that's the best approach.

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Speaker 1: I love that answer. And I love this next question.

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Speaker 1: I love my co workers how it starts, but I

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Speaker 1: did not sign up to be their part time therapist

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Speaker 1: by lunch. I've heard about their ex, their cat's gluten allergy,

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Speaker 1: and their cousins third divorce. I want to be kind,

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Speaker 1: but I also want to get my work done. How

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Speaker 1: do I gently tell them without sounding like I don't care?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Well, I think we have all worked with that

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Speaker 2: person who doesn't seem to have boundaries, just won't shut

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Speaker 2: up about their personal lives, or definitely shares too much

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Speaker 2: too frequently. They can disperse a breakroom faster than someone

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Speaker 2: microwaving fish for lunch. I've seen it. We've all had

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Speaker 2: that experience. Someone you do care about, then you should

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Speaker 2: tell them that you really do care and you enjoy

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Speaker 2: your conversations, but you really have to catch up on

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Speaker 2: a ton of work and can we maybe talk about

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Speaker 2: this later after work? Do you want to grab a

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Speaker 2: bite or a drink? And every time it comes up

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Speaker 2: at work, if you keep saying I really care, I

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Speaker 2: want to help, but maybe we can talk about it

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Speaker 2: after work or or you know, during lunch or something

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Speaker 2: that hopefully that they will they will get the message

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Speaker 2: or again, depending on the relationship. If it's banal banter

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Speaker 2: about their cats gluten allergy, you can make fun of

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Speaker 2: it and then change the subject. Do this enough times

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Speaker 2: in that kind of way with someone you care about

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Speaker 2: and eventually they should get the message. And if they don't,

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Speaker 2: then I think again, as a friend over lunch, having

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Speaker 2: a direct heart to heart like you would with any

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Speaker 2: friend outside about you know what, what's working, what's not working,

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Speaker 2: is always a good approach.

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Speaker 1: So I love this. Let's do this again, Greg. If

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Speaker 1: you want to send a question again Greg, go to

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Speaker 1: Greg dot com. Go to Greg dot com and he'll

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Speaker 1: answer your questions. Also, if you have a question for Greg,

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Speaker 1: you can leave it on our talkback. That would be

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Speaker 1: wonderful to get the question directly from you and we'll

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Speaker 1: use it on a future show.

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Speaker 2: Sound good, Greg, sounds great to me. You're the best, Larry.

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Speaker 1: Thank you. I love you too. Greg g and Grande

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Speaker 1: career advice expert with us every Wednesday at nine thirty five.

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Speaker 1: Check them out at go to Greg dot com. This

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Speaker 1: has been a podcast from wo R