WEBVTT - Faking It

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<v Speaker 1>Can I complain about my upstairs neighbor?

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<v Speaker 2>David?

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<v Speaker 1>Sure, I've complained about her a lot.

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<v Speaker 2>She's very nice person, but she has the loudest feet.

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<v Speaker 2>She walks around very loudly all the time, and I

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<v Speaker 2>swear she's constantly.

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<v Speaker 1>Walking back and forth, back and forth.

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<v Speaker 2>But a new thing, not a new thing, but a

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<v Speaker 2>thing that she's been doing that has also irked me,

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<v Speaker 2>especially like last night, I'm laying in bed, it's like

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<v Speaker 2>ten fifteen after I saw Wicked, came home, laying in bed,

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<v Speaker 2>and I can hear her doing the loven upstairs, and

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<v Speaker 2>it's like it's usually it it creeps in because you

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<v Speaker 2>can hear something and you're like, what is that thing

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<v Speaker 2>that I hear? Because her bedroom is one hundred percent

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<v Speaker 2>right right right above mine, and if I can hear

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<v Speaker 2>her walking, then I can definitely her hear her doing

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<v Speaker 2>the loven. But what's annoying about it? Because I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 2>care if it was just kind of like a week

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<v Speaker 2>weeky weeky weeky, because then it's over eventually, and then

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<v Speaker 2>I can you know it's calming, she's giving right there,

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<v Speaker 2>she's but yes, because she's making sounds.

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<v Speaker 1>She's constantly making.

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<v Speaker 3>Thump, it would be.

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<v Speaker 1>That's what I said.

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<v Speaker 2>Vonn Okay, that's what I said, because she's it's it's

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<v Speaker 2>not just the like rhythmic nature of the sound, because

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<v Speaker 2>that's fine.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't care, you know, you do you. I'm glad

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<v Speaker 1>you're getting some grillly pop.

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<v Speaker 2>But it's the loud exclamation during it, and I can

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<v Speaker 2>hear you.

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<v Speaker 3>You're right underneath.

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<v Speaker 2>You're literally right there, and I can hear you. And

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<v Speaker 2>I think that's all put on. That's all an act.

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<v Speaker 2>She's not making those sounds in earnest.

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<v Speaker 3>Come on, so she's got so she's putting on a show.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, she's putting on a show for whoever she's up

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<v Speaker 2>there with.

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<v Speaker 3>I've heard somebody one said sex is naked theater, and

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<v Speaker 3>I don't disagree with that. That sounds right because I

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<v Speaker 3>think that some people sex is naked theater. It's a

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<v Speaker 3>chance to bend and perform and try to get the

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<v Speaker 3>best reaction you can out of your audience, which is

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<v Speaker 3>a lot of the time it's the woman who is

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<v Speaker 3>doing the theatrics and the guy is going the best

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<v Speaker 3>lover in the world, look at me. Her exclamations.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm listening to her and I'm like, there's no way

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<v Speaker 2>she's naturally making those sounds.

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<v Speaker 1>So she's faking it. You don't know, you don't know

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<v Speaker 1>what she she's putting it on.

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<v Speaker 4>Well, I was going along with your joke.

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<v Speaker 2>I just think she is like, oh god, how often

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<v Speaker 2>is it happening? I don't know, Like once every two

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<v Speaker 2>weeks is when I hear it. Sometimes I'm sure I'm

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<v Speaker 2>sleeping by the time it happens. It could be that good.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not that good every single night.

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<v Speaker 5>Well, I don't think she's getting every yeah, so if

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<v Speaker 5>it was every single night, I'd be like, relax.

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<v Speaker 3>But so the theory is, and we talk about this

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<v Speaker 3>after the kids were in school, because you know, we

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<v Speaker 3>don't want little Cynthia to be like what is that?

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<v Speaker 1>What does that mean?

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<v Speaker 3>But I think that there is something too performative reactions.

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<v Speaker 3>And I think that, well, there's a lot of women

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<v Speaker 3>that do because they just wanted to be over with

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<v Speaker 3>because what are you doing. You're going and he's going, oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>she's loving this. Let's keep going for a.

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<v Speaker 1>Long Then you just hear my upstairs neighbor, oh my yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Then you go and then you go hoping that he'll

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<v Speaker 3>stop because he's just slapping away.

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<v Speaker 2>Sometimes I do want to yell up there, come on,

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<v Speaker 2>give it a rest, But then I don't want to

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<v Speaker 2>embarrass her because I don't think she knows that I

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<v Speaker 2>can hear.

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<v Speaker 1>Everything she does.

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<v Speaker 3>You're right about that.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, No, she's like probably even younger than I am. Honestly,

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<v Speaker 2>she's around my a girl.

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<v Speaker 3>How bad that everybody else is getting some except you.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, she can't hear me doing anything downstairs because I

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<v Speaker 2>think the only thing that she can probably hears my

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<v Speaker 2>cat crying.

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<v Speaker 3>How sad and text messages Bailey at Katie wb One.

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<v Speaker 3>Bailey's claiming that the next door upstairs neighbor is loud

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<v Speaker 3>and faking it noises make it more of a turn on.

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<v Speaker 3>I think that's probably true, rather than sit there unexpressive

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<v Speaker 3>and be like, but you.

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<v Speaker 4>Can't be overdoing it.

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<v Speaker 5>There's an episode of Euphoria where she's clearly making fake noises,

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<v Speaker 5>and I think she stops in the middle She's like,

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<v Speaker 5>are you just faking? And a big oh, and you

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<v Speaker 5>can't be doing it, like like it's clearly like oh

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<v Speaker 5>oh oh, like stop, just cut it out.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't think I would know whether they were faking

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<v Speaker 3>or not. I'm not going to get into details, but

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<v Speaker 3>it's kind of like I'm sure that I probably was

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<v Speaker 3>like thinking I'm doing a really good job many times,

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<v Speaker 3>and my partner was like, oh god, uh uh uh

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<v Speaker 3>uh uh, get off, get off of me, please text messages.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm loud, but it's partly feedback for my partner. Another one,

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<v Speaker 3>my upstairs neighbor walks very loudly too, all day long.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, I wonder how many people and if you feel

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<v Speaker 5>comfortable texting fake it?

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<v Speaker 4>And how I do you fake it?

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<v Speaker 2>If there's a bold statement, I would say, like if

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<v Speaker 2>you're doing the love and all the time and you're.

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<v Speaker 1>Always going, oh my gosh, you're faking it. Period, you're

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<v Speaker 1>faking it.

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<v Speaker 2>So I mean it might be for feedback, great, give feedback,

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<v Speaker 2>But why you gotta be so loud that I can

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<v Speaker 2>hear you downstairs?

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<v Speaker 1>Why God be so loud. I'll be morning in upstairs apartment.

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<v Speaker 3>All you ever gonna be is loud. Some day I'll

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<v Speaker 3>be sleeping with my little kid and all your ever

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<v Speaker 3>gonna be is loud. Oh God, she's okay. You just

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<v Speaker 3>heard the genius happen just now. It's amazing. All right,

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<v Speaker 3>bring Jenny no kidding, Jenny, when you coming back to

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<v Speaker 3>going back really briefly, and we don't want to get

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<v Speaker 3>too hung up on this, but Bailey was complaining about

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<v Speaker 3>her neighbor upstairs.

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<v Speaker 1>My neighbor upstairs.

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<v Speaker 2>She she walks really loud, and now she has taken

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<v Speaker 2>to having the love and very loud, and I think

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<v Speaker 2>she's faking it because it's just, you know, you hear

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<v Speaker 2>the rhythmic.

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<v Speaker 1>And then you hear her going, oh my god.

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<v Speaker 2>It's annoying, and I think she's faking it, and I

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<v Speaker 2>think she should stop.

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<v Speaker 3>We got a text from somebody who said, eight years

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<v Speaker 3>with the same guy, faked it every single time.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow.

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<v Speaker 3>And so then it's like, well, why do you fake it?

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<v Speaker 3>I mean redirect your partner to tell them what to do.

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<v Speaker 3>And a lot of women have probably tried that and

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<v Speaker 3>he just e's it or it's not cooperating or it's

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<v Speaker 3>not working or whatever. So we just have an expert

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<v Speaker 3>on the show and I can't remember her name, but

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<v Speaker 3>she said women will fake it to get it over with.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like like you know, slapping away, and it's like

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<v Speaker 3>you just wanted to be done, so you'll be you know,

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<v Speaker 3>we pretend that you're finished. Yeah, so he'll finally be

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<v Speaker 3>like But the only problem with that is it builds

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<v Speaker 3>up a sense of well, that worked, I'm going to

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<v Speaker 3>do that again.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I must be so good.

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<v Speaker 2>I what I'm doing is so magical that this text

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<v Speaker 2>says women should not fake so much, because then dudes

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<v Speaker 2>think what they're doing is so great every succession. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>we're filling their heads with an ego that will not

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<v Speaker 2>suit them with future partners. It's like telling someone they're

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<v Speaker 2>good at something when they're just average or they suck

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<v Speaker 2>at it.

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<v Speaker 5>Women do this all the time. Forget future partners. What

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<v Speaker 5>if that is your future partner? Yeah, you tell them

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<v Speaker 5>to help them, critique them, you know what I'm.

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<v Speaker 1>Saying, and then you end up faking it for eight years.

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<v Speaker 3>Well we'll hear his Eron fake it for eight years.

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<v Speaker 3>Eron is on the phone eight years same guy, Aaron, Right, Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>That's actually been sixteen with him.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, so you're you're still in the relationship. Did you

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<v Speaker 3>have to fake it? I don't want to get too personal.

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<v Speaker 3>You can hang up if you want to. Did you

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<v Speaker 3>have to fake it with other partners before this person?

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<v Speaker 2>Uh? No, and the first date We're fine.

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<v Speaker 4>It's just been the last date the first eight years. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 4>because you've been sixteen totally.

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<v Speaker 3>So in the last the first eight we're fine. What change?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 3>Can I I mean again, hang up if you don't

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<v Speaker 3>want to answer, what changed?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, two kids and snut books.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh and then so like yeah, how No, it's clear

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<v Speaker 3>he's doing he's getting a stimulation from the the people he.

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<v Speaker 4>Is okay, okay, gotcha?

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<v Speaker 3>No no, no, no, no, no, no no no. Oh okay.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm reading too many books and I'm getting pictures in

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<v Speaker 2>my head and I'm asking him to try new things

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<v Speaker 2>and he just doesn't go for it.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, I see.

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<v Speaker 2>So she's getting inspiration and he's like now I don't

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<v Speaker 2>want to.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh okay, So after you expecting.

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<v Speaker 3>The other way around. I thought maybe he was looking

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<v Speaker 3>at the smut books and he was not needing the okay.

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<v Speaker 5>Interesting, So your expectations got raised after eight years and

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<v Speaker 5>he wasn't meeting them.

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<v Speaker 4>Correct, gotcha? But don't you want to? I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>Man.

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<v Speaker 5>Like I said to Bailey, I just wouldn't fake it,

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<v Speaker 5>because if that's going to be your partner for life

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<v Speaker 5>or for whatever long, the only person that benefits from

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<v Speaker 5>you telling them that they're not good?

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<v Speaker 4>Is you so like that way they can get better,

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<v Speaker 4>they can improve.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe we can start here first, Do you heard it here? First?

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<v Speaker 1>Stop faking it everyone.

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<v Speaker 3>But it's so I think the problem is if you

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<v Speaker 3>you've been do you really want your guy to know

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<v Speaker 3>that you've been faking it for the last three years?

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<v Speaker 3>And it's like, wait, really for the last three years,

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<v Speaker 3>So now you're gonna come clean. And I also think

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<v Speaker 3>that people are worried about the guy's ego. And it's like,

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<v Speaker 3>because I've once had a girlfriend told me that's how

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<v Speaker 3>you kiss, that's how you kiss, and I was pissed. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, nobody in my life has ever told

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<v Speaker 3>me I'm not a good kisser. And she was like,

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<v Speaker 3>that's how you kiss. And that was the one and

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<v Speaker 3>only time we ever made out. Oh yeah, there's a

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<v Speaker 3>radio personality.

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<v Speaker 4>His name is DJ Nvy. He's on the Breakfast Club.

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<v Speaker 5>His wife wrote in a book about how for their

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<v Speaker 5>entire relationship they've been married for thirty something years, she

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<v Speaker 5>has faked it every single time. And I don't know

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<v Speaker 5>why you'd put that in a book. First of all,

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<v Speaker 5>I would never let my wife expose that. But really,

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<v Speaker 5>but I mean, after all this time, he's like working

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<v Speaker 5>with her to be like, Okay, this is what we

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<v Speaker 5>should do.

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<v Speaker 1>Let's try this wow communication. That's fine.

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<v Speaker 5>Well now I'm not gonna trust you afterward. Now you

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<v Speaker 5>could be like, oh, now you're doing better, and I'm

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<v Speaker 5>still not gonna trust you.

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<v Speaker 3>But Aaron, any advice for anybody who's like been faking

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<v Speaker 3>it or not enjoying it.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I mean I keep trying to help him, keep

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<v Speaker 4>trying new things.

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<v Speaker 2>So I guess I don't.

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<v Speaker 4>I just I don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>I keep trying because it's you know, it's not just

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<v Speaker 1>in the bedroom where he means the most to me.

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<v Speaker 2>So that's a nice sentiment. Well, maybe today is the

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<v Speaker 2>day that it changes, make it happen, right right.

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<v Speaker 3>Aaron, thank you for being on. I really appreciate it.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you.

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<v Speaker 3>I think what we learned is there's a lot of

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<v Speaker 3>people are kind of in the same boat. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>I like the phrase that the bedroom's not the only

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<v Speaker 2>place that he means a lot to me.

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<v Speaker 3>I like that a lot