WEBVTT - Shannon's Empty Threat  

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<v Speaker 1>All right, it is Mojo in the morning.

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<v Speaker 2>Uh.

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<v Speaker 1>You cannot, as a parent ever give your child an

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<v Speaker 1>empty threat, and you did this weekend. Shannon.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, well, okay, yes it was an empty threat, but

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<v Speaker 3>I was Have you ever been in that situation where

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<v Speaker 3>you're so frustrated with something and you're just like trying

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<v Speaker 3>to come up with some sort of consequence, so like

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<v Speaker 3>something comes out of your mouth and you're like, I know,

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<v Speaker 3>I'm not going to follow through with this whatsoever.

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<v Speaker 1>So every time I ever took the kid's phones away

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<v Speaker 1>from them, I regretted it the moment, I think because

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<v Speaker 1>then I had to actually talk to him.

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<v Speaker 3>I'll be honest with you, I'm usually very mindful and

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<v Speaker 3>cautious about the consequences that I give to the kids

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<v Speaker 3>because I know I have to follow through. I also

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<v Speaker 3>know I'm gonna pushover, but I know I need to

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<v Speaker 3>follow through it. Well, this was like a different story.

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<v Speaker 3>So we're taking a spring break trip this year, and

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<v Speaker 3>it's myself and my husband Wes, my kids, Lucy and Smith,

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<v Speaker 3>and then my stepdaughter Samantha is coming as well. Kieran,

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<v Speaker 3>my step son. He's away at college. He has a

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<v Speaker 3>totally different spring break and it is Samantha. She's a junior,

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<v Speaker 3>so this is her last really family trip. I guess

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<v Speaker 3>that she's going to be taking with us because next

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<v Speaker 3>year she's going to go on saying senior spring break.

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<v Speaker 1>She's going to be doing her own thing.

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<v Speaker 3>So we had a family meeting a couple of weeks

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<v Speaker 3>ago about where do we where should we go?

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<v Speaker 1>Where do we want to go?

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<v Speaker 3>And Wes and I had narrowed it down after a

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<v Speaker 3>lot of research to three places. All of them were

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<v Speaker 3>we're going to cost us about the same, so we

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<v Speaker 3>didn't care where, you know, we chose as a family

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<v Speaker 3>and the three destinations were the Florida Keys, Mexico, or London. Yes,

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<v Speaker 3>believe it or not, flying to London and doing a

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<v Speaker 3>trip there's the same as going.

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<v Speaker 1>To the Florida case.

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<v Speaker 3>So we gave everybody, we talked through all the choices.

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<v Speaker 3>Then we voted and Lucy and I voted for London,

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<v Speaker 3>Samantha and Smith voted for Mexico, and Wes was kind

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<v Speaker 3>of on the fence. Well, we ended up going with Mexico.

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<v Speaker 3>We're gonna go to Mexico and we're gonna We used

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<v Speaker 3>Costco Travel to do this and they make it so

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<v Speaker 3>dang easy. So we were like, okay, we're going to

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<v Speaker 3>choose the easy, the easy route here. And also that's

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<v Speaker 3>kind of where Sam wanted to go, and I thought

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<v Speaker 3>her last spring break, we're gonna, you know, let her pick.

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<v Speaker 3>Lucy not happy about that because we did not pick

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<v Speaker 3>where she wanted to go, and she has been disgruntled

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<v Speaker 3>about it since we made the decision and booked the trip.

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<v Speaker 3>And so over the weekend, we went to the mall

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<v Speaker 3>and I took the kids shopping for some warm weather

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<v Speaker 3>clothes because I thought, okay, let's like start to get

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<v Speaker 3>prepared for this. It's going to come up on us fast.

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<v Speaker 3>We might as well, you know, buy some shorts and

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<v Speaker 3>flip flops and whatnot. And she was acting pretty ungrateful

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<v Speaker 3>about it, and was just complaining and complaining, and so

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<v Speaker 3>I said, I stopped walking, and I said, fine, then

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<v Speaker 3>just stay with dad while we all go on the trip,

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<v Speaker 3>and she.

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<v Speaker 1>Goes, fine, I will.

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<v Speaker 4>I wanted to do that.

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<v Speaker 3>Anyway, So I very dramatically pulled my phone out of

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<v Speaker 3>my purse and I wrote my an email in all caps.

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<v Speaker 3>The subject line was cancel Lucy's flight. And I made

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<v Speaker 3>sure that she could see it. I'm like, okay, I'll

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<v Speaker 3>remember on Monday to go, you know, into the account

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<v Speaker 3>and cancel, cancel your you're part of the tread. She

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<v Speaker 3>was so quiet for the rest of the day and

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<v Speaker 3>so quiet when we got home, and then that evening

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<v Speaker 3>I got an apology from her that she was acting,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, she was being ungrateful and she did want

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<v Speaker 3>to go and she was just saying that. And she

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<v Speaker 3>also goes, mom, I knew you weren't going to cancel

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<v Speaker 3>that ticket, Like yeah, I was like, no, I really

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<v Speaker 3>was going.

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<v Speaker 1>To have you done that before where you said you

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<v Speaker 1>were going to do something and you didn't do it,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's why she knew it or what do you think?

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<v Speaker 3>I think that it was such a big threat that

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<v Speaker 3>she knew that.

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<v Speaker 1>I was not. I was not going to do that.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm always amazed at the parents that make the big

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<v Speaker 1>threat and do the follow through, like the parents who

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<v Speaker 1>will say I'm turning this car around and turn the

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<v Speaker 1>car around like it's pretty wild. Like when you do that,

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<v Speaker 1>I give you guys tons of credit. Chelse would give

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<v Speaker 1>me so much crap over time, because I would go

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<v Speaker 1>right for the gusto man, I'd go for the big one.

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<v Speaker 1>I'd do them. I would do the grand slam of

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<v Speaker 1>you know your I'm grounding you for the summer, and

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<v Speaker 1>Chelsea would look go job yeah eight four four mojo

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<v Speaker 1>live eight four four six six five six five four eight.

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<v Speaker 1>Uh do you okay? So here's here's a topic that

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<v Speaker 1>I've always wanted to know. Has anybody ever had like

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<v Speaker 1>some huge punishment that they had to follow through on

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<v Speaker 1>and what was it? And then also what's the biggest

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<v Speaker 1>punishment you remember as a kid. There was a kid

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<v Speaker 1>in my neighborhood that I remember was grounded for the

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<v Speaker 1>whole summer. Oh yeah, I remember, kids. I mean it

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<v Speaker 1>was wid Do you remember what he did? He failed

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<v Speaker 1>like three classes in school and it was all because

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<v Speaker 1>he just wasn't doing anything. He wasn't showing up or

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<v Speaker 1>anything of that, and had to do summer school. The

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<v Speaker 1>kid had to go. We literally we would drive our bikes,

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<v Speaker 1>ride our bikes by his house and he would be

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<v Speaker 1>inside the house or he'd be outside doing lawn work

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<v Speaker 1>and he couldn't even talk to us for the whole summer.

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<v Speaker 3>But I have a friend who made the threat of

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<v Speaker 3>she got lions tickets like good seats Lions tickets. She

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<v Speaker 3>the family never gets to do something like that, and

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<v Speaker 3>her and her husband saved up got tickets for all

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<v Speaker 3>the kids, and two of the kids were being, you know, bad,

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<v Speaker 3>and so she was like, that's it, you know, gave

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<v Speaker 3>them a final warning of we're I'll sell the tickets,

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<v Speaker 3>we're not going to the game, and she ended she

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<v Speaker 3>actually ended up selling the tickets and they all didn't

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<v Speaker 3>go to the game, and she's like, I'm pissed because

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<v Speaker 3>I wanted to go to the game so bad, but

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<v Speaker 3>she followed through with that threat.

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<v Speaker 1>That's amazing. I always think it's wild that that the

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<v Speaker 1>one parent that does make that threat does stay home.

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<v Speaker 1>And let's sometimes because sometimes the best threat is not

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<v Speaker 1>just selling the tickets, it's letting the others in the

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<v Speaker 1>family go and you having to stay home with your kid. Morgan,

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<v Speaker 1>what's going on?

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<v Speaker 5>Hey, I was just calling.

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<v Speaker 6>So when I was younger, back when phones had like

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<v Speaker 6>the prepaid minute, I without thinking realizing what I was doing,

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<v Speaker 6>racked up like four hundred dollars worth of internet charges.

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<v Speaker 6>And so for Christmas, my mom worked it out with

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<v Speaker 6>all of my family, where for cousins, they gave me

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<v Speaker 6>the exact amount of money that I owed.

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<v Speaker 2>For the bill that I was unaware of.

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<v Speaker 6>And then she turned around, showed me the bill and said,

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<v Speaker 6>now you can give me all your Christmas money.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh wow, and took it all. You know, your first

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<v Speaker 1>dose of the bill collector right there, having them come

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<v Speaker 1>right at you. Uh, what is it they? What do

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<v Speaker 1>they do to your wages?

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<v Speaker 5>They?

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<v Speaker 1>She garnished your Christmas presents? What's going on? Megan?

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<v Speaker 4>Hey guys, I just wanted to comment that I'm now

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<v Speaker 4>in my forties, but when I was back in high school,

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<v Speaker 4>I told my parents I quit smoking. They caught me

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<v Speaker 4>several times and they said, well, we catch you again.

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<v Speaker 4>You're not going on your senior trip to Cedar Point

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<v Speaker 4>and you we will drive you to prom and home

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<v Speaker 4>from Prom, and you will not go out with your

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<v Speaker 4>friends after. Well, I was working at Best Buy one

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<v Speaker 4>day and sitting in my car smoking on break, and

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<v Speaker 4>my parents rolled up. I just dropped the cigarette and

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<v Speaker 4>I knew right then and there I was done.

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<v Speaker 7>And they held me to it.

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<v Speaker 4>And to this day, I'm still like dramatized.

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<v Speaker 1>They drove you to prom, yes, oh my god?

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<v Speaker 4>And my boyfriend to prom and came and picked.

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<v Speaker 1>Me up and no spring break at all? Was that

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<v Speaker 1>the last cigarette you had? Yes? Is that drue? Where

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<v Speaker 1>do you take the cigarette? It was brutal?

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<v Speaker 7>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait are you joking with us when you said that

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<v Speaker 1>was the last cigarette you ever had? I?

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<v Speaker 4>Well, no, yeah, I am joking because it was I

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<v Speaker 4>cont you to smoke after that, but I did, like

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<v Speaker 4>in two thousand and fourteen.

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<v Speaker 1>God, okay, all right, we just want to, uh, what's up?

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<v Speaker 4>By?

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<v Speaker 1>Is it? Is it Jaysa?

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<v Speaker 8>Yeah, it's Jisa.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up? Look at you?

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<v Speaker 2>Hey?

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<v Speaker 8>My story is that when I was in high school,

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<v Speaker 8>I was like a sophomore and I'm a sophomore in college,

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<v Speaker 8>I got my phone took them away for like three months.

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<v Speaker 5>It was like the worst push but ever, because.

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<v Speaker 8>When you're in high school, everybody has the phones and

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<v Speaker 8>it's just like wow, like you don't have your phone.

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<v Speaker 8>And me and my friend Jocelyn, we would doom call

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<v Speaker 8>and we would set up doom calls and we would

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<v Speaker 8>email each other about what would happened and stuff.

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<v Speaker 1>And wait, what did you get grounded for three months

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<v Speaker 1>from your phone for what'd you do?

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<v Speaker 8>My mom was really really strict. It was because I

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<v Speaker 8>had a boyfriend.

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<v Speaker 1>Ah, well, you were doing something with your boyfriend too,

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<v Speaker 1>besides just having a boyfriend. Naughty? Am I right?

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<v Speaker 4>Well not really, I was.

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<v Speaker 8>I was good, but she just she.

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<v Speaker 1>Just didn't want you to have them. Okay, all right?

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<v Speaker 1>Three months without a phone, man, I'd lose my mind.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up, Ashley, Take guys.

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<v Speaker 9>Good morning, Good morning. I I am the youngest of

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<v Speaker 9>three daughters and I had have still have the best

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<v Speaker 9>parents growing up, though my oldest sister was the troublemaker.

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<v Speaker 7>She would push all the boundaries, and my dad just

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<v Speaker 7>he he set the tone for parenting.

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<v Speaker 5>So my sister brought.

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<v Speaker 7>Home an interim halfway through a you know, report card season,

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<v Speaker 7>and she had a dep and my dad said, if

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<v Speaker 7>you do not get this great up to at least

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<v Speaker 7>ab you know, it can be like low B whatever.

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<v Speaker 7>You're going to be granted for the whole next quarter,

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<v Speaker 7>the whole nine weeks. Well, my sister, not thinking he's

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<v Speaker 7>going to be serious about it, she got a D.

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<v Speaker 2>He said, that's it.

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<v Speaker 7>You're done. No friends, no sporting events, nothing. Wow, it's

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<v Speaker 7>the most social person.

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<v Speaker 1>And that was, Oh, that's crazy. That's a long time

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<v Speaker 1>that you're without it, because you're great and the worst

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<v Speaker 1>is you're waiting for the good grades to come out. Man,

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<v Speaker 1>I hope she got good grades. What's that, Bresa?

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<v Speaker 2>Hello? First time one time? Well round? Yeah, I ground

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<v Speaker 2>I grounded my son when he was fifteen. He's twenty

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<v Speaker 2>five now. He would refuse to do anything but to

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<v Speaker 2>play video games, and his grades were suffering so much

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<v Speaker 2>so with my husband, and I actually was more him

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<v Speaker 2>than than I did, but I allow it there I'm remarried.

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<v Speaker 2>So he took all everything away, all video games, consoled

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<v Speaker 2>anything that was in the house, and lastly was the

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<v Speaker 2>phone was six months rounded without it. We will used

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<v Speaker 2>to tell him, ah.

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<v Speaker 1>Six months no electronics, man.

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<v Speaker 2>Not nothing. And he actually and I treld him with

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<v Speaker 2>the week. He told me he was gonna go leave

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<v Speaker 2>with his dad and I said, okay, you are, you

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<v Speaker 2>are going, I said, but you're not going with your dad.

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<v Speaker 5>You're going to a board in school.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, in a boarding school. I remember when

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<v Speaker 1>in the boarding school. Brisa, Can I ask you an

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<v Speaker 1>honest question, at any point during the grounding that you had,

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<v Speaker 1>did you regret it because you had to actually deal

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<v Speaker 1>with him the whole time?

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely not. My son came back to be a normal kid.

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<v Speaker 2>To have some conversations, eye contact. See he starts playing guitar.

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<v Speaker 1>He's great, that's awesome. See when I round my kids,

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<v Speaker 1>when I brought ground my kids, it's more of a

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<v Speaker 1>punishment for me than it is for them. Thank you.

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<v Speaker 2>He's married and he finished college.

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<v Speaker 1>So good good work. Thank you Bresa for the call.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you, Thank you guys.

0:11:47.679 --> 0:11:51.200
<v Speaker 1>Bye bye real quick, one last call here, Martha. We

0:11:51.200 --> 0:11:54.080
<v Speaker 1>were talking about the people that will threaten. I'll turn

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<v Speaker 1>the car around. What happened, Martha.

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<v Speaker 10>So when I was like going into high school, it

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<v Speaker 10>was my boyfriend's first time going to Thanksgiving with us,

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<v Speaker 10>and this was back in California, and it was like

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<v Speaker 10>a three hour drive and me and my brother did

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<v Speaker 10>not want to go. So we just kept fighting and

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<v Speaker 10>acting up in the back seat, and my dad kept threatening, like,

0:12:17.080 --> 0:12:19.360
<v Speaker 10>if you guys don't behay. My mom had cooked the turkey,

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<v Speaker 10>everything that was in the trunk, and my dad kept

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<v Speaker 10>threatening like, if you guys don't stop, we're going home.

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<v Speaker 10>And we're like, well that's what we want. So we

0:12:27.120 --> 0:12:32.960
<v Speaker 10>kept going and finally he got fed up, pulled over.

0:12:33.320 --> 0:12:35.360
<v Speaker 10>We ended up. We're like, what are we doing? He

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<v Speaker 10>made everyone get down and we ended up having Thanksgiving

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<v Speaker 10>at a truck.

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<v Speaker 3>Stop around.

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<v Speaker 10>Yeah, so my boyfriend's first time.

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<v Speaker 4>Going to Thanksgiving with us and we're having.

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<v Speaker 1>Dinner at a truck Was your boyfriend thinking your family's weird?

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<v Speaker 10>Yeah, well he's my husband now, so he's still.

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<v Speaker 1>By the way. Ever, when you're at your family's house,

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<v Speaker 1>you ever sit there and go, God, those days were

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<v Speaker 1>better than now, like sitting at a truck shop eating.

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<v Speaker 10>Definitely, definitely talking, That's what my husband.

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<v Speaker 5>Definitely, we talked about it all the time.

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<v Speaker 10>And the funniest thing was he made us unload everything

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<v Speaker 10>when we got home, put it away, and then he

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<v Speaker 10>made us all go back to my grandma's house the.

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<v Speaker 1>Next day, Oh and do it make good.

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<v Speaker 10>Dinner with her and then work the farm.

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<v Speaker 1>Did the truckers forever look at you guys like, what

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<v Speaker 1>the hell is this family doing eating turkey?

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<v Speaker 5>And yes, we got especially because my brother's like, what

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<v Speaker 5>the heck are we doing here? He's like, mom, but

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<v Speaker 5>we have a turkey in the trunk. So yeah, it was.

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<v Speaker 1>It was funny.

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<v Speaker 5>I was shocking at the time, and I kept apologizing

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<v Speaker 5>to my husband and my well my boyfriend then, but

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<v Speaker 5>to my husband and but I will never forget that.

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<v Speaker 10>I think that was one of our best things giving.

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<v Speaker 1>That's cool, that's awesome. Good family, mommies right there, mommies.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm a man now