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Speaker 1: He came up with the name of this four week series.

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Speaker 1: We talked a lot about last week New Year's resolutions.

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Speaker 1: A lot of us make them, and often times it's

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Speaker 1: about our health, especially our physical health, getting in better shape.

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Speaker 1: But the series is called the Me I want to be,

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Speaker 1: the me I want to be, so Chad to recap

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Speaker 1: in case people missed part one, I'm not too busy.

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Speaker 1: It's just not a priority. Recap that for us before

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Speaker 1: we move on to topic number two, if you would please.

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Speaker 2: Sure, Yeah, thanks showing me again. When you say to yourself,

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Speaker 2: I'm too busy, it kind of gives you the illusion

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Speaker 2: that you're a victim of your own life. If you

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Speaker 2: say I'm not too busy, it's just not a priority.

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Speaker 2: It's both convicting. Oh my goodness, I'm not doing this

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Speaker 2: because I'm not prioritizing it. On the other hand, it's

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Speaker 2: rry freeing. That's right, I'm not doing that right now

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Speaker 2: because it's a lesser priority. I reference the idea is

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Speaker 2: a guy named Nea Maya who helped rebuild the walls

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Speaker 2: in the city in Jerusalem, and when he did that,

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Speaker 2: there's a whole bunch of old trying to distract him.

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Speaker 2: He sends a message to them and says, hey, guys,

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Speaker 2: I'm doing a great work. I don't have time. Don't

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Speaker 2: have time to come down and talk to you. In

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Speaker 2: other words, you're not a priority. It's okay that there's

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Speaker 2: certain distractions in life, certain things in certain seasons of

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Speaker 2: life you can't do. But when you say it's not

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Speaker 2: that I'm too busy, it's not a priority, it really

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Speaker 2: helps crystallize you and keep you from making the excuses

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Speaker 2: we all make to ourselves. Okay, the second thing we

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Speaker 2: talked about last week is just learning how to just

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Speaker 2: love your life the way it is and not wait

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Speaker 2: for some arbitrary future deadline to begin trying to enjoy

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Speaker 2: what you have around you.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, and that could come in just a roof over

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Speaker 1: your head. It could come in your spouse, it could

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Speaker 1: come in your children, the things are doing well as

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Speaker 1: opposed to focusing on what they're not doing well. Today

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Speaker 1: we're going to talk about make a to be list

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Speaker 1: rather than a to do list.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and I think this is something, and I think

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Speaker 2: it's the classic question you know, to be or not

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Speaker 2: to be is the question I think.

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Speaker 3: That really is.

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Speaker 2: The question is have you really thought about yourself, Who

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Speaker 2: am I becoming? Am I to do list should flow

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Speaker 2: out of my to be lists, and I can look

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Speaker 2: at good circumstances and bad circumstances and say, are these

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Speaker 2: helps shaping me and who I want to be? When

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Speaker 2: I was in my twenties, I've been married a couple

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Speaker 2: of years and I just had we had my first

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Speaker 2: child on the way, and I really was challenged to

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Speaker 2: do this. I sat down and began to think about

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Speaker 2: who are the people in my life that I want

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Speaker 2: to be like? And I don't know who you'd come

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Speaker 2: to mind, but like one of mine was my grandfather,

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Speaker 2: and I thought about certain character qualities he had and

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Speaker 2: I wrote those down, and I thought many things about

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Speaker 2: my father that were really aspiring to me. Ways he parented,

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Speaker 2: the way he connected, the way he controlled his temper.

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Speaker 2: And I just took a page and I began to

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Speaker 2: write down all the character qualities I wanted to be

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Speaker 2: and I wanted God, I wanted a life I wanted

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Speaker 2: to intentionally partner with to become. And so I wrote

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Speaker 2: all those pieces down. And so I'd encourage anyone who

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Speaker 2: wants to create a tab list find a hero. Of course,

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Speaker 2: we're all flawed. I'm plenty flawed. All the people I

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Speaker 2: mentioned are flawed. But find those character qualities and all

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Speaker 2: the different heroes in your life begin to say, what

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Speaker 2: would it look like if I could become that version

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Speaker 2: of myself. It's almost like finding a hero or finding

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Speaker 2: a model for yourself. I had a buddy of mine

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Speaker 2: became one of my heroes in my industry, and he

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Speaker 2: said he is in his sixties and the time he

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Speaker 2: said Chad his last name Sutter. He said, the world

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Speaker 2: has yet to see a Sutter who's actually happy. In

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Speaker 2: the seventies. He talked about all his relatives get grumpier

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Speaker 2: and grumpier, the chronologically aged, and he really wanted to

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Speaker 2: be a person filled with joy and other centeredness. And

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Speaker 2: I remember the old commercial about the tombstone pizza. You

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Speaker 2: know what do you want on you all tombstone? It's

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Speaker 2: more than though on my tombstone. I accomplished these things.

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Speaker 2: When you're sitting at your deathbed and people are around

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Speaker 2: you who know you, what do you want them to

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Speaker 2: see about who you became over your seventy eighty ninety years.

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Speaker 2: I became a person of love. I became a person

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Speaker 2: of peace. I became a person of real character. I

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Speaker 2: was kind. I was And that's what you hear at funerals.

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Speaker 2: I do lots of funerals. You get to hear about

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Speaker 2: people's character qualities, soar more than you actually hear about

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Speaker 2: the things they accomplished and what really lasts that people

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Speaker 2: really remember about you.

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Speaker 3: So you know, it's interesting you say that.

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Speaker 1: Girl, It's really interesting you say that because about funerals,

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Speaker 1: and you know you do so many of them. And

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Speaker 1: I've been to a couple where you've handled at Horizon

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Speaker 1: Church and it really is amazing. I mean, you don't

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Speaker 1: sit up there and when your kids get up there,

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Speaker 1: or your grandparents or your grandkids get up there, they're

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Speaker 1: not talking about the building that somebody named after you.

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Speaker 1: Not that there's anything wrong with having a building named

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Speaker 1: after you, if you were committed to something, or you

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Speaker 1: gave money to something, a university of high school, whatever,

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Speaker 1: animal shelter, anything wrong with any of those things.

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Speaker 3: But it really is what people want to hear.

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Speaker 1: It is finding a hero when you're sitting at a

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Speaker 1: funeral of boy. My granddad used to do this, and

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Speaker 1: I'm thinking to myself, Gosh, when I'm a granddad, I

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Speaker 1: want them saying the same thing about me.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And even if you did get a building named

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Speaker 2: after it's because you were generous, it's because you were

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Speaker 2: other centered. It's because you're trying to impact other people. Later,

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Speaker 2: it's still that to do or that accomplishment still trace

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Speaker 2: back it to it to be. There's a on the

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Speaker 2: stained glass side. There's a verse in the Bible, this

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Speaker 2: is the will of God. It was like, what's God's

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Speaker 2: will for my life? This is God's will for your life,

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Speaker 2: that you would be conformed into the image of his son.

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Speaker 2: It's whether you're a Jesus person or not. If you've

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Speaker 2: ever read the biography of Jesus, Matthew Mark Luker John,

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Speaker 2: the guy is just a stunny example of a life

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Speaker 2: best lived. I mean, I think he's got himself, but

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Speaker 2: even if you don't, he gets angry at the right times,

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Speaker 2: he gets angry at the right people. Well, he is

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Speaker 2: so in control under duress, he has peace. So find

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Speaker 2: a hero. And it's almost like have you ever been

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Speaker 2: on like a carnival cruise line. There's always that day

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Speaker 2: that they bring out the ice sculptor and they've got

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Speaker 2: this big block of eyes that start chiseling.

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Speaker 4: Away at it.

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Speaker 2: To be conformed in the image of something is to say, hey,

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Speaker 2: life's chiseling away at me right now, or I feel

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Speaker 2: like God's chiseling await with me right now. But it's

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Speaker 2: not meaningless pain. I'm being chiseled into something. And you're

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Speaker 2: watching that ice sculpture and you're like, what in the

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Speaker 2: world is going to become? Chop chop chop, chop, chop

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Speaker 2: chop chop. After about thirty minutes, you're like, oh, my goodness,

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Speaker 2: it's a beautiful swan, it's an angel, it's whatever it is.

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Speaker 2: You realize all that pain, all that challenge was purposeful

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Speaker 2: in the same way you look at your own life

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Speaker 2: and say, God, I'm going through some times I don't

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Speaker 2: like right now. There's some hard time to some chiseling times,

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Speaker 2: but I want to partner with life, partner with you,

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Speaker 2: so that I'll be chiseled into somebody who is other centered.

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Speaker 2: And what I did to make mine more memorable for

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Speaker 2: me is I took my one in my twenties, I

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Speaker 2: did my last name that got two long, so I

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Speaker 2: didn't my first name. Take those character qualities and try

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Speaker 2: and shorten to something you can remember like my name Chad.

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Speaker 2: I kind of took that and said, I want that

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Speaker 2: to represent number one connections. The main thing I'm trying

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Speaker 2: to be about is connecting to my wife, connecting my kids,

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Speaker 2: connecting the people who are important to me as people

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Speaker 2: I work with and work for, age humble, humility is

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Speaker 2: a huge critical juncture. I just see pride destroys marriages,

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Speaker 2: that destroys people's ability to learn and grow. So humility

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Speaker 2: was one of my character qualities. A for Chad is authentic.

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Speaker 2: I want to be the real mean matter what you

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Speaker 2: see me on stage or see me off stage, and

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Speaker 2: my kids get to know that. I admit when I

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Speaker 2: do stuff wrong because I want to be authentic and

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Speaker 2: then indeed dependable. I just see so many people who

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Speaker 2: say things that don't follow through. So those were like

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Speaker 2: my four character qualities reduced into four words. And then

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Speaker 2: I had a longer one for hope, and which includes

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Speaker 2: things like initiate for other, centeredness for oh, the needs

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Speaker 2: of others, and I begin to write down the needs

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Speaker 2: of my spouse specifically, as it just became a really

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Speaker 2: helpful way to check in and verify this is what

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Speaker 2: I'm trying to accomplish. And this is what I'm hoping

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Speaker 2: the life and God's going to do in my life.

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Speaker 2: And it really has become a memorable way for me

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Speaker 2: to partner with the challenges and then assign my to

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Speaker 2: do list from that to be list.

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Speaker 1: When you make up this list, a to be list

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Speaker 1: rather than a to do list oftentimes. And I was

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Speaker 1: reading about this just recently in the last day or two,

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Speaker 1: and the quote was from this big, huge hedge fun

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Speaker 1: guy who opened all these charter schools in New York City,

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Speaker 1: eighty of them I think he opened. And he was asked,

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Speaker 1: you know the meaning of life? And he says, to

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Speaker 1: sacrifice for the betterment of others. Now, I mean, that's

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Speaker 1: a beautiful way of looking at life, right, to make

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Speaker 1: your personal sacrifices for the betterment of others. But that

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Speaker 1: took action on his part, and he talked a lot

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Speaker 1: about that and how yeah, it's it's one thing to

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Speaker 1: write it down, it's another thing to go do it.

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Speaker 1: Give everybody out there, give me something that Okay, here's

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Speaker 1: a word, you know, you just used them off the

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Speaker 1: letters in your name. Give me an example of something

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Speaker 1: where Okay, I'm going to make this to be listed

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Speaker 1: and Now, what's something I could go do to put

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Speaker 1: that in practice? And I'm talking of maybe outside of okay,

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Speaker 1: being nicer or more connected to my wife.

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Speaker 2: Right, yeah, Well, I'll give you one. Reject passivity. There's

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Speaker 2: a tendency in all of us, except for work, maybe

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Speaker 2: to reject passivity and the things that really matter and

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Speaker 2: to delay it. And so how can I be intentional

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Speaker 2: in initiating the things I want to be true? So

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Speaker 2: it's like two years went by and I have not

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Speaker 2: initiated in accomplishing my goal. I've not initiated in really

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Speaker 2: taking seriously that I want to lose weight I want

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Speaker 2: to really have I've accepted passivity. When it comes to

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Speaker 2: I get home, I completely check my brand at the

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Speaker 2: door and don't think that I need to engage with

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Speaker 2: the people around me. So that would be one. I

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Speaker 2: want to reject passivity. So what's the opposite? I want

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Speaker 2: to initiate and then really right down, what does a

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Speaker 2: person who initiates in your current.

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Speaker 3: Life look like?

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Speaker 2: What does it look like? You want to have a

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Speaker 2: better connection with your mom and dad, for example, So

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Speaker 2: I know of like for years my mom and dad

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Speaker 2: and I had a very close relationship, but we just

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Speaker 2: weren't in a family that says I love you very often.

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Speaker 2: My grandpa never said it. So I decided in my thirties.

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Speaker 3: I'm going to stop that.

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Speaker 2: I know I love my mom and dad. I know

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Speaker 2: they love me, we just don't say it. It's kind

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Speaker 2: of weird, really, So I just decided. And it was

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Speaker 2: strangely awkward at first. Sure, it was thirty years ago

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Speaker 2: where I decided I'm going to end the phone call

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Speaker 2: by saying, Mom, I love you. And it was so

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Speaker 2: weird that that so was even at the time, was

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Speaker 2: awkward because it changed and Mom starts saying it, Dad

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Speaker 2: starts saying Now. I always knew it. It wasn't lacking, sure,

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Speaker 2: but I had to take the initiative, and I thought,

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Speaker 2: that's what I'm going to do. We mentioned my brother.

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Speaker 2: In the ten years we didn't talk Western law. Just

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Speaker 2: recently I re engaged with it'd be easy to say,

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Speaker 2: you know, it's kind of better off. Let by gods

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Speaker 2: be bygones. I can't control how they're gonna react, but

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna initiate. Another thing I'd say, is that date

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Speaker 2: the women in your life. Yeah, when your mom's in town,

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Speaker 2: if she's out town, they say, mom, while we go

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Speaker 2: out to dinner to go she and I. Your mom

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Speaker 2: will probably be amazed by that if you got a daughter.

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Speaker 2: I started dating my daughter when she was two, maybe

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Speaker 2: even one. You know, we're gonna go on our little

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Speaker 2: Chick fil A data where you go get chicken minis

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Speaker 2: and Sunday morning, or we go get an ice cream

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Speaker 2: calling evening. But the women in your life initiates, and

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Speaker 2: we all do that when we're first dating. You know

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Speaker 2: we're gonna woo them all and then we kind of

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Speaker 2: get into passivity. What does it look like to date

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Speaker 2: your daughter, date your wife, date your mom? What does

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Speaker 2: it look like to really be intentional? So that'd be one.

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Speaker 2: Another one for me is fun. I know it's not

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Speaker 2: as high for other people, but I have lots of

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Speaker 2: fun all the time, and I initiate fun. When's the

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Speaker 2: next trip we're gonna take, when's the next family night

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Speaker 2: we're gonna go out on? What's the next movie night?

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Speaker 2: So for me, I wanted to be someone who initiated

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Speaker 2: environments where friends laugh together, where a family can talk.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes we're initiating at a family gathering. We don't want

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Speaker 2: to just say hey, it's your birthday, we might go

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Speaker 2: around the room and have everyone say something about the

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Speaker 2: person's birthday we care about. It's just ways of being

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Speaker 2: intentional and turning. Like I talked last week about Kronos,

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Speaker 2: your regular time at the Krinos, this was an opportunity

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Speaker 2: to really say something and do something and bless somebody.

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Speaker 2: So there's a couple examples.

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Speaker 1: That's great stuff. A tease for next week. Make a

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Speaker 1: hierarchy of needs.

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Speaker 2: Yes, hierarchy of needs is understanding that there's always going

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Speaker 2: to be a way in which ten things want your attention.

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Speaker 2: So what are the things going to prioritize over the

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Speaker 2: other ones? And what's the most important thing I'm going

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Speaker 2: to do versus what's the most urgent thing I'm going

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Speaker 2: to do? And how do I make sure the tyranny

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Speaker 2: of the urgent doesn't step on top of the character

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Speaker 2: qualities and the priorities that I want to shape me?

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Speaker 2: And really, even in the job, this is the most important,

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Speaker 2: even though these are the ten phone calls that just

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Speaker 2: came in. How do I prioritize not the tyranny of

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Speaker 2: the urgent, but the hierarchy that's really true?

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Speaker 1: Love it the me I want to be with Pastor

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Speaker 1: Chad Hogan. Thank you for your time, sir, love this

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Speaker 1: stuff and everybody's looking forward to the next couple of

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Speaker 1: weeks as we continue this series.

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Speaker 3: So hope you have a great rest of your day.

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Speaker 2: You too appreciate it.

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Speaker 1: Alrighty let's check the traffic. It's been absolute. I don't

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Speaker 1: know if chaos. Would you use that word, chuck chaos?

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Speaker 4: I think we're just shy of it. Okay, okay, yeah,

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Speaker 4: unfortunately yep. From the UC Health Tramphing Center. The UC

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Speaker 4: Health Women's Sports Medicine Program provides specialized care for female

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Speaker 4: athletes at all levels. Schedule and appointment online at UCHealth

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Speaker 4: dot com. Northbound seventy five earlier accidents are clear, still

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Speaker 4: running close to an extra twenty five minutes between turf

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Speaker 4: Way and Town southbound seventy five. They cleared the accident

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Speaker 4: below Monroe above one twenty nine. Traffic's still heavy through Lachland.

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Speaker 4: Still working with an accident on the eastbound two seventy

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Speaker 4: five that's near forty two in Shearonville. And there's a

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Speaker 4: wreck on Montana above Westwood. More than southbound traffic blocked

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Speaker 4: off at Anaconda. Chuck Ingram News Radio seven hundred WLW WCPO.

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Speaker 1: Nine first Warning forecasts not too bad out there right now.

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Speaker 1: Maybe it's raining where you are, a light rain and

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Speaker 1: the temperature is not bad. We're still on the plus

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Speaker 1: side of forty, but that will change as a cold

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Speaker 1: front and cold air settles in as a day goes on.

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Speaker 1: By the time you drive home from work, going to

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Speaker 1: be around thirty two degrees tonight, extremely cold. For the

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Speaker 1: next number of days. We will be in the teens

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Speaker 1: tonight in the wind chill is a high Tomorrow in

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Speaker 1: the teens and then in the single digits wind chill

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Speaker 1: tomorrow night, Friday and Saturday. We might get some snow,

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Speaker 1: Jennifer saying probably not an inch or right at an inch.

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Speaker 3: The two days combined are high.

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Speaker 1: On Friday will be twenty seven, but again with the

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Speaker 1: wind chill, is going to feel a lot colder than that,

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Speaker 1: and then on Saturday a little warmer. It'll be thirty five,

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Speaker 1: but will feel like it's in the twenties. So bundle up,

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Speaker 1: take care of your animals and look if you need

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Speaker 1: to get one, they could use a second chance. Get

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Speaker 1: to your local animal shelter, bring home a dog or

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Speaker 1: a cat, you'll be healthier, you'll be happier, you'll have

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Speaker 1: more love in your house. Saloni around the corner. This

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Speaker 1: is the Nation. Station seven hundred WLW, Cincinnati,