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Speaker 1: Uh so, I don't know sky if after twenty five

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Speaker 1: years of marriage, if your patience is finally wearing thin.

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Speaker 1: But it seems like you're getting a little bit more

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Speaker 1: annoyed at your husband the booth these days. Finally.

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Speaker 2: Okay, I'm a boards guy. Yeah, I've always had enough.

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Speaker 3: I've had enough first started the show. Yeah, so twenty

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Speaker 3: five years may may have something to do with it.

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Speaker 1: You're just like now addressing it because I think maybe

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Speaker 1: you were annoyed before, but now you're actually saying something.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well, when something when things build for years, decades, yeah,

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Speaker 3: eventually you finally kind of say a thing or two.

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Speaker 2: My my hormones may have something to do with it.

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Speaker 4: Par securely takes so much, right, Like I just it's

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Speaker 4: it's like mind boggling.

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Speaker 2: But he's never said it either. Okay, Okay, you really are.

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Speaker 2: And here's the thing.

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Speaker 3: Most things in our relationship, You're right, I don't speak

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Speaker 3: of them. I don't bring them up. We just go

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Speaker 3: about our merry way. You bury the feelings deep down

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Speaker 3: and then who knows, maybe fifty years in you'll finally

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Speaker 3: address them. But in what we're about to talk about,

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Speaker 3: this is something I've actually addressed multiple times, which is

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Speaker 3: super rare for us. So that's why I'm like kinda

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Speaker 3: at my.

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Speaker 2: Breaking point with it.

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Speaker 3: So if you're not aware, my family does not have

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Speaker 3: the traditional setup that you know most American families have.

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Speaker 3: We decided, probably about five years before having children, that

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Speaker 3: my husband would be a stay at home father.

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Speaker 1: But there was no kid to stay at home.

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Speaker 2: For like five years. Yeah, can you be.

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Speaker 1: A stayt home father with no kid?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's kind of weird because we had just moved

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Speaker 3: here so for my job. He had left his job,

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Speaker 3: and we decided, oh, we're going to start a family soon.

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Speaker 3: This is how we're going to do it. Turns out

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Speaker 3: a little longer to start that family than expected. But

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Speaker 3: my husband has been a stay at home father for

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Speaker 3: my daughter's entire life. And you may be thinking, but sky,

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Speaker 3: isn't your daughter turning sixteen next week? Yes she is,

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Speaker 3: and yes he still is a stay at home father.

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Speaker 1: She's turning sixteen, like next is it next week?

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Speaker 4: Next?

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Speaker 2: Next week?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Oh so yeah, but stay at home dad, you never

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Speaker 3: know when she's gonna need something.

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Speaker 2: You know, you pick her up from school sometimes, don't you.

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Speaker 2: You know, we're not gonna analyze that. So anyway, not

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Speaker 2: the traditional setup that most families have got it.

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Speaker 3: But what most families probably will relate to is whatever

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Speaker 3: parent is, they're the most like physically, they're the most

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Speaker 3: with the kids. Normally, their uh voice doesn't carry as

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Speaker 3: much authority as the other parent, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: So if mom's always home, mom can tell the kids

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Speaker 3: something and the kids are like, sure, whatever, Mom, But

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Speaker 3: the dad comes home and tells them and they're like,

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Speaker 3: oh crap, I gotta do that, right.

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Speaker 2: So our family is that reversed.

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Speaker 3: So when my husband says something, my daughter kind of

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Speaker 3: like laughs at him and rolls his eyes.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't come across as serious.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 2: That's just the dynamic we have. Okay, So I don't know.

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Speaker 3: Probably like two years ago I said to my husband,

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Speaker 3: I said, Okay, when me and our daughter are having

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Speaker 3: a conversation just the two of us, it's probably not

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Speaker 3: in your best interest to get involved, because she, you know, unfortunately,

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Speaker 3: doesn't respect you the same way she respects me, because

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Speaker 3: you're always there for her, you give her everything she needs,

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Speaker 3: and I'm the one that's not as present, So.

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Speaker 2: It's probably not gonna go so well for you.

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Speaker 3: If you try and get involved, especially if I'm already

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Speaker 3: on it, you know what I mean, Like, if I'm

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Speaker 3: already giving CPR to a patient, somebody else coming in

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Speaker 3: and trying to jam their hands on the chest, it's

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Speaker 3: probably not helpful.

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Speaker 1: What a wild analogy. I I don't agree with that.

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Speaker 1: I think that you know, when you're a set of

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Speaker 1: parents and you show a united front on something, then

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Speaker 1: it shows the kid, Oh this is like this is

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Speaker 1: both mom and dad are like on the same page

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Speaker 1: of this, to the effect of if you're performing CPR

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Speaker 1: and the other person comes over and does mouth to mouth,

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Speaker 1: You're you're saving the person.

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Speaker 2: Okay, and and you are.

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Speaker 3: I totally agree with that for like big serious issues.

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Speaker 3: But if we're in a discussion because she's upset about

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Speaker 3: her outfit and and she's like.

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Speaker 1: Maybe no, I'm avoiding that like the play totally.

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Speaker 3: But he will come and yeah no, and then and

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Speaker 3: now what and now she's like, give me an example.

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Speaker 3: I don't know, like before like this is when I

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Speaker 3: first had the conversation with him, he would come and

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Speaker 3: be like, oh, yeah, what's what's going on?

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Speaker 2: What?

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Speaker 3: And it's like, dude, We're like, we're in it. We're

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Speaker 3: and lots of times it's girl talks. A lot of

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Speaker 3: interject but why would you want to?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, if if my daughter and my wife are having

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Speaker 1: a thing and it's about outfits or what girls stuff,

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Speaker 1: I am going to run in the opposite direction. I

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Speaker 1: don't want anything to do with that. I'm not gonna

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Speaker 1: interject and be like, oh, no, you're you know if

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Speaker 1: it does make you look spectacular or some crazy thing

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Speaker 1: like that, no way.

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Speaker 4: And my man, Robert, my son, you're talking about like

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Speaker 4: dirt bikes or something, then I'm not going.

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Speaker 1: To It's it's a very different dynamic again with you

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Speaker 1: two as well. You're heavily involved in your son's life

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Speaker 1: and aspects of that, and it's different for boys than

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Speaker 1: it is girls. Girls. It's like there's so much drama,

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Speaker 1: there's so much emotion, there's so much like no, thank

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Speaker 1: you as the dad, I don't want anything to do

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Speaker 1: with that. Yeah, So that's crazy. It's like literally going,

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Speaker 1: you know what, I see there's hot love over there.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna just at least dip my foot in this. Hey,

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Speaker 1: what's going on over here?

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Speaker 2: Whoa great and out?

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Speaker 1: That's crazy.

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Speaker 2: That's why I said to him like it's not necessary.

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Speaker 3: If it's a serious issue, clearly I'll tag you in,

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Speaker 3: but like why throwing yourself in the law, Just like,

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Speaker 3: why are you doing that? And so he kind of

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Speaker 3: listened for a while and then you know, so he'd

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Speaker 3: see me and her having a conversation and he would

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Speaker 3: just you know, walk on by, walk walk on by.

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Speaker 2: Okay, great, this is good.

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Speaker 3: But then about six months ago, don't know why, it

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Speaker 3: changed again, and now he'll see us having a serious

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Speaker 3: conversation and he will sniper comment. But here's the problem

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Speaker 3: with mister sniper comment as he's walking through is he

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Speaker 3: heard the discussion fifteen minutes ago of whatever's going on

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Speaker 3: with my daughter, and then by the time he walks

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Speaker 3: by fifteen minutes later, we've probably already moved through like

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Speaker 3: three different top onto something else.

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Speaker 2: So say it starts with her.

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Speaker 3: Not feeling well, but by the time he walks through

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Speaker 3: the room, we're now talking about boys. He'll walk through

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Speaker 3: the room and see that there's like an intense topic

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Speaker 3: going on and he'll be like, ah, you'll just take

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Speaker 3: some tile and all with dinner, and then keeps walking

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Speaker 3: and we both look at him like psycho, we're not

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Speaker 3: even talking about that, and why are you making that comment?

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Speaker 3: You don't know what we're talking about. And he's trying

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Speaker 3: to like be encouraging. So say we're having a conversation

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Speaker 3: that she's stressing out about a test. Yeah, fifteen minutes

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Speaker 3: later he walks by and we're now talking about training

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Speaker 3: the dogs.

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Speaker 2: He'll be like, you got this, You're gonna kill this tomorrow?

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Speaker 1: What? Oh like a motivational speaker.

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Speaker 4: Right.

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Speaker 3: Again, keep in mind the dynamic of like he's nails

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Speaker 3: on a chalkboard to my daughter.

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Speaker 2: Because he's the you know, primary one that's there, I.

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Speaker 1: Can see why.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I'll think that's what it is there.

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Speaker 3: So like, maybe she's having problems with an outfit that

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Speaker 3: she can't put together. And then fifteen minutes later, we're

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Speaker 3: talking about her best friend. He'll walk through the room

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Speaker 3: and be like, you have so many clothes? What are

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Speaker 3: you even worried about?

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Speaker 1: What?

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Speaker 2: Like, dude, we're not talking about that, and again, have

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Speaker 2: you forgot the hot lava? Like?

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Speaker 3: But then he just keeps walking and I don't know

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Speaker 3: why he's doing this. He's never on topic. It's never

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Speaker 3: the right thing. And again I've told him, if I'm

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Speaker 3: on it. If I'm in it, why are you doing

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Speaker 3: this to yourself?

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Speaker 1: So what's the biggest issue is that the'se off topic

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Speaker 1: or that he's making the comment at all?

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Speaker 3: I mean, I think both, But I think what makes

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Speaker 3: it super bad is the fact that he's not even

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Speaker 3: on topic at all, and like the fact that I've

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Speaker 3: kind of already soothed that topic and made that topic

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Speaker 3: go away, and then he just runs right through, shouts

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Speaker 3: something out, and then keeps going.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, why is it he stopping? Like that's what's really

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Speaker 2: also thrown around. I think he's talking bring the comming up.

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Speaker 3: Then maybe you guys can have a discussion about well,

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Speaker 3: I think he's not stopping because he believes he's listening

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Speaker 3: to me of not getting involved.

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Speaker 2: Oh okay, but but he's getting involved, absolutely getting in.

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Speaker 3: Like you know, she'll be talking about like, oh, you know,

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Speaker 3: oh I think I look ugly or whatever you know

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Speaker 3: kids are saying. And then again we're onto a totally

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Speaker 3: different topic of homework, and he'll come walking through.

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Speaker 2: He'll be like, you just be you, You're you're beautiful.

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Speaker 2: What we're talking about homework?

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Speaker 1: R fortune, I don't understand what these little comments are

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Speaker 1: so weird.

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Speaker 3: So I know hes trying and thinking he's doing something good,

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Speaker 3: but like.

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Speaker 2: It's got to stop.

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Speaker 3: And and I feel bad because I don't want to

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Speaker 3: tell any parent to like butt out that it's life,

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Speaker 3: but this is weird.

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Speaker 1: It's it's not butting out is just like unnecessary. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: And so you know, if if Deborah told me like why,

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Speaker 1: she could ask like, why are you doing that? And

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Speaker 1: if I say, oh, I'm just you know, I'm trying

203
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Speaker 1: to throw encouraging words out, and if she told me, well,

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Speaker 1: it's actually not helping, it's kind of doing the opposite,

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Speaker 1: I was like, oh, okay, well then I'm gonna stop

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Speaker 1: doing that. Yeah, but you have to let him know

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Speaker 1: because well I don't know why he's deciding to do this,

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Speaker 1: but it seems crazy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's wild, Like you can stay on topic.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, it's just simply you guys are having your time together,

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Speaker 4: mother daughter time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's all that it is.

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Speaker 2: He doesn't need to feel sad about it or feel

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Speaker 2: like he's being left out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, then an on topic thing, who cares.

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Speaker 2: It's just it's just even more annoying because.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I get that, but it's just unnecessary.

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Speaker 3: We don't. You don't even know what we're talking about,

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Speaker 3: and you're going to walk by and interject something, and

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Speaker 3: especially all of it. That's when it's like advice or

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Speaker 3: something like that, Like.

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Speaker 1: No, it's all weird. Yeah, I don't understand why this started.

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Speaker 2: Did you say anything about it?

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Speaker 4: Most recently, Well, I've kind of been on the fence

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Speaker 4: about it because I'm like, again, I don't want to

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Speaker 4: tell a parent to like not talk to their kids

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Speaker 4: or the.

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Speaker 2: Half out pere stir talk that Bob. Maybe raise your

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Speaker 2: voice a little bit.

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Speaker 1: Start dragging dragging them. She has no problems telling you,

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Speaker 1: none of them to mind your business, mind your business. Wow,

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Speaker 1: that is wild, all right,