WEBVTT - Stain Glass, Plain Glass with Pastor Chad Hovind 1/21/2026

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<v Speaker 1>Ah.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, when you hear don't stop believing. That means it's

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<v Speaker 2>time for our weekly get together with Pastor Chad Hoven

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<v Speaker 2>from the Horizon Community Church right there in Newtown, Ohio,

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<v Speaker 2>right along the bank, so the little Miami River, beautiful

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<v Speaker 2>setting over there.

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<v Speaker 3>Lake right out the back of the church. All right.

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<v Speaker 2>We decided three weeks ago, and Chad came up with

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<v Speaker 2>the title of our four part series. A lot of

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<v Speaker 2>people like to make New Year's resolutions, and so maybe

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<v Speaker 2>different than your say, physical health or whatever it might be.

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<v Speaker 2>He calls this series the me I Want to Be

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<v Speaker 2>Today is part three. But Chad, for those that may

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<v Speaker 2>have missed parts one and two, let's start with number one.

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<v Speaker 2>If you can just you know, sort of prioritize or

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<v Speaker 2>summarize more accurately.

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<v Speaker 3>Number one, I'm not too busy. It's just not a priority.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, say, mass praise to yourself is really helpful because

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<v Speaker 1>it helps you remember that when you choose not to

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<v Speaker 1>do something, it's because you're choosing not to do something.

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<v Speaker 3>The kind of.

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<v Speaker 1>False belief that we're too busy. We're going to fill

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<v Speaker 1>our life with things that are important to us, and

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<v Speaker 1>so if you're not prioritizing something, it's because you're not

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<v Speaker 1>prioritizing something. Sep phrase is really helpful in aligning what

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<v Speaker 1>it is you're really choosing to do and choosing not

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<v Speaker 1>to do. Okay, the first week and the second week

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<v Speaker 1>we talked about to be list should be what drives

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<v Speaker 1>your to do list, which is who do you want

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<v Speaker 1>to be, who you're becoming, who you're forming yourself into.

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<v Speaker 1>Then how do you make sure that what you're choosing

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<v Speaker 1>to prioritize or engage in, or when life kind of

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<v Speaker 1>comes at you and you can't choose it, how do

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<v Speaker 1>I use this to become a more generous person, to

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<v Speaker 1>become a less worryful person, How do I become more

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<v Speaker 1>courageous person? And that can really bring meaning and purpose

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<v Speaker 1>even when you're under dress.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, I loved as part of that second part

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<v Speaker 2>of our series about where you talked about making a

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<v Speaker 2>list of character qualities that you saw in the oh

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<v Speaker 2>that you have respect for. It could be a loved

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<v Speaker 2>one in your case, it was a grandfather for some others,

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<v Speaker 2>it could be somebody you work with.

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<v Speaker 3>It could be a friend. It could be one of

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<v Speaker 3>your children.

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<v Speaker 2>Something you look at them and you're like, man, I

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<v Speaker 2>wish I were more like that in that way.

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<v Speaker 1>Right without a doubt. Yeah, exactly, And I think it

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<v Speaker 1>actually infused it with meaning because you're like, it's not

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<v Speaker 1>just a theoretical idea. I've seen this lived out. I've

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<v Speaker 1>seen this personalized in someone, and this is what a

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<v Speaker 1>life well lived can look like. And obviously no one

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<v Speaker 1>is perfect that you might say, Hey, that particular quality

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<v Speaker 1>of that person, I like you. I want to leave

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<v Speaker 1>the other things behind on that person, this other person,

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<v Speaker 1>I want to pick up what their strengths are. So

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<v Speaker 1>it really gives you a vision for what living in

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<v Speaker 1>a profoundly human way looks like. And you start seeing

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<v Speaker 1>that there's almost intangible, immaterial, almost supernatural qualities behind that,

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<v Speaker 1>and you're like, man, I want to partner with that.

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<v Speaker 2>We call it plain glass, stained glass. We do it

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<v Speaker 2>every Wednesday with Pastor Chad Hooven from the Horizon Community Church. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>now we get to part three series of the me

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<v Speaker 2>I want to be make a hierarchy of needs? What

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<v Speaker 2>does that mean? Yeah, well you.

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<v Speaker 1>Mean remember from psychology class if not, there is a

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<v Speaker 1>gun named aslov who create a hierarchy of needs and

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<v Speaker 1>thinking it like the food pyramid. At the bottom, he said,

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<v Speaker 1>our foundational need is a biological needs food and water.

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<v Speaker 1>Then on top of that is the next most important

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<v Speaker 1>thing safety. Then the third thing is love and belonging.

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<v Speaker 1>The way towards the top of the pyramid is esteem,

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<v Speaker 1>and then lastly at the very top, if you really

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<v Speaker 1>have time for self actualization, spiritual values, et cetera, I'd

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<v Speaker 1>like to propose that you should actually turn those values

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<v Speaker 1>upside down and inside out, which is what if you

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<v Speaker 1>know a lot of people have their physical needs mets

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<v Speaker 1>and their safety needs met, and yet they're discouraged, they're depressed,

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<v Speaker 1>they're not happy. And it's not to say the food

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<v Speaker 1>and water and safety is important, but what if the

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<v Speaker 1>focus is to turn that upside down. I'm always focusing

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<v Speaker 1>on my externals, not focused on my internals. I need

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<v Speaker 1>to turn inside out, which is what's really going on

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<v Speaker 1>inside of me. There's an old French philosopher Pierre. I

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<v Speaker 1>can't Heber's last name, but he says man is not

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<v Speaker 1>primarily a human being having a spiritual experience. Mankind is

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<v Speaker 1>primarily a spiritual being having a human experience. Do you

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<v Speaker 1>think of it this way? Like every human being you

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<v Speaker 1>feel it. I feel it. Everyone you know humans are

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<v Speaker 1>obsessed with finding meaning and purpose, Like, why would that

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<v Speaker 1>be except that we are created from a meaningful process.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, if the whole world was created in a random,

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<v Speaker 1>meaningless way, it would not create creatures that are obsessed

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<v Speaker 1>with meaning. So in saying that, say, then okay, then

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<v Speaker 1>what are my self actualization one of my core values?

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<v Speaker 1>What are the things I really need to focus on?

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<v Speaker 1>That hierarchy of needs? And when you know that, you

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<v Speaker 1>start realizing when you come to decisions, I know what

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<v Speaker 1>to say yes to and what to say no to.

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<v Speaker 1>For many of us, we focus on staying busy, being productive.

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<v Speaker 1>And I love staying busy and I love being productive.

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<v Speaker 1>But what if instead you said, while I'm doing that,

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<v Speaker 1>the real hierarchy is I need to go deep. I

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<v Speaker 1>need to pay attention to my body. My body is

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<v Speaker 1>telling me right now, I'm discouraged. My body's telling me

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<v Speaker 1>right now, I am stressed. My mind is racing. What

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<v Speaker 1>if I was focused on I need to prioritize that, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>I want to work hard, Yes, I want to be

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<v Speaker 1>the best employee I can. Yes, I want to provide

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<v Speaker 1>for my financial needs. For my goodness I've been ignoring

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<v Speaker 1>my body. I've been ignoring my mind racing. I've been

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<v Speaker 1>ignoring that, whether it's depression, or whether it's anxiety, or

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<v Speaker 1>whether it's worry or maybe I saw on my parents, man,

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<v Speaker 1>they were so fearful their whole life. I've now inherited

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<v Speaker 1>some of that. I need to go deep. I need

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<v Speaker 1>to get to the bottom of this. I need to

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<v Speaker 1>what I'm doing, why I'm doing it, how I do it,

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<v Speaker 1>and why. I think that's going to force you to

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<v Speaker 1>keep being good at what you do, but not ignore

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<v Speaker 1>the symptoms all around you that you said, Ah, that's

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<v Speaker 1>the top of the pyramid. What a luxury to think

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<v Speaker 1>about that kind of stuff versus that might be your

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<v Speaker 1>body and mind really crying out to you about what

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<v Speaker 1>really matters.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, I'm kind of curious. It's sparked the question

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<v Speaker 2>I've often wondered. And you talked to so many people

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<v Speaker 2>on so many different levels of things they're going through.

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<v Speaker 2>It could be a breakup of a marriage, it could

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<v Speaker 2>be the loss of a loved one, grief, et cetera.

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<v Speaker 2>All kinds of deal issues with a child who perhaps

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<v Speaker 2>has gone astray. One thing that made me wonder when

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<v Speaker 2>you were just talking about something there about for us

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<v Speaker 2>to go deep? Okay, do you think and based on

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<v Speaker 2>your experience, do you think that a person, if they

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<v Speaker 2>really want to go deep, that they have to resolve

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<v Speaker 2>some issues of maybe some things in their past that

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<v Speaker 2>they've never dealt with. And I'm not talking here now

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<v Speaker 2>about serious trauma. I'm not talking about someone who is

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<v Speaker 2>physically or sexually of you.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a whole different level. And there's no doubt about

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<v Speaker 3>the answer to that question.

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<v Speaker 2>But I'm talking you know, maybe your parents had a

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<v Speaker 2>terrible div uh, maybe you and your sister, how whatever

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<v Speaker 2>it could be, is it important for you to go

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<v Speaker 2>deep as you just made reference to, do you have

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<v Speaker 2>to be able to put some of those other things

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<v Speaker 2>to bed that may have happened five years ago, forty

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<v Speaker 2>years ago before you can go deep?

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<v Speaker 1>Well? Yeah, I think it might even be the very

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<v Speaker 1>definition of going to deep as a deal with those things.

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<v Speaker 1>It's how did I become who I am? And what

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<v Speaker 1>part of that is me reacting to the past, What

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<v Speaker 1>part of that is me repeating the past? And how

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<v Speaker 1>do I move to a place where I'm responding to

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<v Speaker 1>the past. What's the difference? Responding is I know what happened,

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<v Speaker 1>I know what part of it I'm choosing to leave behind.

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<v Speaker 1>I know what part of it is I have healed from.

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<v Speaker 1>There's a there's a psychology called love attachment theory, and

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<v Speaker 1>it says that the problems in your marriage didn't begin

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<v Speaker 1>in your marriage. And you think, God, if only my

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<v Speaker 1>spouseuld blah blah blah. But really, if you've picked up

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<v Speaker 1>patterns from the past, you're still caring wounds or wounded

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<v Speaker 1>miss And you know this, We all know this. How

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<v Speaker 1>wonderful your life is. And here in America and living

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<v Speaker 1>in twenty twenty six, you know we all are very,

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<v Speaker 1>very blessed. However, life is brutal, and it is hostile

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<v Speaker 1>often and the things we endured, the difficulties, and sometimes

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<v Speaker 1>that's expectations to for many of us. Yeah, often you

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<v Speaker 1>can't enjoy the life you could have until you have

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<v Speaker 1>to grieve the life you should have. And many of

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<v Speaker 1>us had expectations. My life should be like this. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>now forty years old, I'm now sixty years old. I

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<v Speaker 1>should be X, Y and Z. And because of some

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<v Speaker 1>brutal part of your life, something that happened that was

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<v Speaker 1>beyond your control, or you know, we all make bone

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<v Speaker 1>heeaded decisions too. We go, then we beat ourselves up

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<v Speaker 1>over if only I hadn't done that, said that been

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<v Speaker 1>there across that line. So a lot of times it's grieving,

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<v Speaker 1>and I don't think a lot of us know how

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<v Speaker 1>to grieve. And grieving is saying, man, I know what happens,

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<v Speaker 1>I know what I wanted to happen. I did my darkness.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean there's times like I remember my book came out.

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<v Speaker 1>I did my darkness to.

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<v Speaker 3>Kind of.

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<v Speaker 1>Check every dot, every eye, cross every tee to make

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<v Speaker 1>sure I had done my part to make it successful.

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<v Speaker 1>And it was moderately successful, but not at the level

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<v Speaker 1>I hoped for. And you know, I had to grieve that.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, I thought that would be you know, A

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<v Speaker 1>B and C. And it was, you know, maybe better

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<v Speaker 1>than others. Other times it's more deeper stuff. You're looking

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<v Speaker 1>at past and saying, my goodness, I'm still carrying the

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<v Speaker 1>wounds of you know, needing to be a mediator between

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<v Speaker 1>my mom and my dad, you might think, or growing up,

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<v Speaker 1>you might say, I had a very volatile childhood and

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<v Speaker 1>because of that, it just bread a lot of worry

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<v Speaker 1>or anxiety in me. And if I don't consciously deal

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<v Speaker 1>with that, I probably already bread some of that to

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<v Speaker 1>my kids. You might say, Man, I want to show them,

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<v Speaker 1>even as an adult, now that they're in the twenties

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<v Speaker 1>or thirties, that dad is still growing. And there's a

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<v Speaker 1>tendency I think in all of us to think chronological

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<v Speaker 1>time is going to magically heal the stuff inside you.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, we all know that. You know, you can

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<v Speaker 1>be chronologically getting older, and you can be developmentally getting

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<v Speaker 1>more and more immature, or more and more grumpy, or

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<v Speaker 1>more and more self focused. So if you're not intentional

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<v Speaker 1>about it, the current of life, the current of your

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<v Speaker 1>own trajectory, is to often take you towards more self centeredness,

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<v Speaker 1>more miism, and those festering wounds. And last week the

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<v Speaker 1>church I talked about Mount Saint Helen's and what made

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<v Speaker 1>Mount Saint Helens so devastating is when the when the

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<v Speaker 1>explosion went off of that cryptodoom dome off the side

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<v Speaker 1>of the mountain a thousand years earlier, all these sulphuric

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<v Speaker 1>gases underneath the mountain had basically created a teflon plate.

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<v Speaker 1>So about sort of the mountain's just ready to slide off.

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<v Speaker 1>So that explosion triggered a slide that went back to

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<v Speaker 1>one thousand years older, and many geolgists called it a

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<v Speaker 1>sick mountain. It looked beautiful on the outside, but inside

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<v Speaker 1>there was just some sickness. There was some there was

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<v Speaker 1>unresolved sulfuric acid that had basically created a slide plane

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<v Speaker 1>that created devastation later. So it often it says, I

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<v Speaker 1>need to drill down, figure out what smells the batter

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<v Speaker 1>I'm here, I got the superic acid. The smell some

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<v Speaker 1>area of my life. I need to stop ignoring that.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank yeah, give me an example before I let you go.

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<v Speaker 2>We're talking about making a hierarchy of needs, and you

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<v Speaker 2>made the comment, look, something is going to be quote

0:11:10.600 --> 0:11:14.240
<v Speaker 2>unquote cheated right when your time, your energy, maybe your

0:11:14.280 --> 0:11:19.360
<v Speaker 2>money is limited. And how important I've often said, the

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<v Speaker 2>most powerful or one of the most powerful words in

0:11:22.440 --> 0:11:26.000
<v Speaker 2>the English language is two simple letters. No. You just

0:11:26.040 --> 0:11:29.679
<v Speaker 2>said the ability sometimes to say no. Give us an

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<v Speaker 2>example of something that if you're making a hierarchy of needs,

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<v Speaker 2>that you might find yourself having to say no to

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<v Speaker 2>where you weren't before.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I think sometimes as hobbies during this particular season.

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<v Speaker 1>I love this hobby, but it's not as important as

0:11:47.120 --> 0:11:50.439
<v Speaker 1>whatever My health that's as important as my marriage, is

0:11:50.480 --> 0:11:53.480
<v Speaker 1>not important as my time with my kids. It might be, Man,

0:11:53.520 --> 0:11:56.160
<v Speaker 1>I've been really good at managing controlling things. Man, it

0:11:56.200 --> 0:12:00.440
<v Speaker 1>has really caused all kinds of anxiety and pressure delude

0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:03.560
<v Speaker 1>myself into thinking I can control people in circumstances, and

0:12:03.720 --> 0:12:07.199
<v Speaker 1>I need to start prioritizing, surrender, letting go. Really, I

0:12:07.200 --> 0:12:10.520
<v Speaker 1>can't control things. It also could be as simple as

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<v Speaker 1>do you know. I was talking to an executive about

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<v Speaker 1>four months ago, and she was saying to me that

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<v Speaker 1>I only take certain requests for speaking engagements and for priorities,

0:12:22.080 --> 0:12:25.800
<v Speaker 1>things that are related to these topics. And she's very

0:12:25.800 --> 0:12:29.800
<v Speaker 1>well known, she's very sought after. What she says, of

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<v Speaker 1>the hundred things I could do, I say not to

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<v Speaker 1>things that are not This passion point related to specific

0:12:36.360 --> 0:12:39.040
<v Speaker 1>coaching for companies and related to this specific thing related

0:12:39.040 --> 0:12:41.240
<v Speaker 1>to marriages, because my husband and I went to a

0:12:41.240 --> 0:12:43.240
<v Speaker 1>difficult thing. We wrote a book about it, and we

0:12:43.280 --> 0:12:45.600
<v Speaker 1>want to help other marriages do what we did. So

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<v Speaker 1>that person knew their mission. They were qualified to do

0:12:48.760 --> 0:12:51.360
<v Speaker 1>a thousand things. What they said, I only say yes,

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<v Speaker 1>to speak, engagements relate to a or B. I talked

0:12:54.400 --> 0:12:57.520
<v Speaker 1>to a church recently who they say yes to everything.

0:12:57.840 --> 0:13:01.280
<v Speaker 1>The whole staff has overwhelmed, all the organizations overwhelmed because

0:13:01.280 --> 0:13:03.000
<v Speaker 1>I say yes to everything, and I say, listen, you

0:13:03.040 --> 0:13:05.400
<v Speaker 1>don't really have a mission statement for your company or

0:13:05.440 --> 0:13:08.160
<v Speaker 1>for yourself if you don't know what you say no to,

0:13:09.120 --> 0:13:10.839
<v Speaker 1>because when you know what you're good at, what you're

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<v Speaker 1>focused on, and even as a person like for me,

0:13:13.360 --> 0:13:15.160
<v Speaker 1>I could do a lot of things. I'm a generalist

0:13:15.840 --> 0:13:18.160
<v Speaker 1>very much so, and I enjoy that. But I'm trying

0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:20.800
<v Speaker 1>to organize my business life around what are the things

0:13:21.000 --> 0:13:23.720
<v Speaker 1>only I can do for the company, What are the

0:13:23.720 --> 0:13:26.800
<v Speaker 1>things I uniquely can do to advances forward? Then how

0:13:26.840 --> 0:13:29.120
<v Speaker 1>do I delegate the things that I could do but

0:13:29.240 --> 0:13:31.559
<v Speaker 1>other people are better at. So do you know what

0:13:31.640 --> 0:13:34.439
<v Speaker 1>you uniquely can do? And say I want to prioritize

0:13:34.720 --> 0:13:37.560
<v Speaker 1>what I uniquely can do for my family, for my company,

0:13:37.720 --> 0:13:40.000
<v Speaker 1>for my kids. No one else can be my kid's

0:13:40.080 --> 0:13:42.400
<v Speaker 1>dad but me, no one else can may be maybe

0:13:42.440 --> 0:13:44.840
<v Speaker 1>the strategic thinker. You've got to be putting more and

0:13:44.840 --> 0:13:46.880
<v Speaker 1>more time into the strategic thinking, and you get aust

0:13:46.960 --> 0:13:49.880
<v Speaker 1>of the bureaucracy you're doing. I'm a creative teacher. I

0:13:49.920 --> 0:13:52.720
<v Speaker 1>need to spend lots of time creating and focusing on that.

0:13:52.760 --> 0:13:53.880
<v Speaker 1>So I got to say no to a lot of

0:13:53.880 --> 0:13:56.200
<v Speaker 1>meetings I might want to be part of, might want

0:13:56.240 --> 0:13:58.000
<v Speaker 1>to be important, but it's not going to help me

0:13:58.040 --> 0:14:00.560
<v Speaker 1>do what I uniquely can do for the sake my company.

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<v Speaker 2>Great stuff, U, pastor, Chad Hoven, Thank you so much,

0:14:03.480 --> 0:14:05.480
<v Speaker 2>as always for your time. We'll get to part four

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<v Speaker 2>in our series The Me I Want to Be next week.

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<v Speaker 2>Hope you have a great rest of your day and

0:14:10.800 --> 0:14:14.199
<v Speaker 2>a great weekend, My friend you too, all right, Chad

0:14:14.240 --> 0:14:16.840
<v Speaker 2>Hoven kind enough to join us plain Glass, Stained Glass

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<v Speaker 2>each and every Wednesday right here on the Morning show.

0:14:20.240 --> 0:14:22.640
<v Speaker 2>That's great stuff, I mean great stuff. You don't have

0:14:22.680 --> 0:14:27.480
<v Speaker 2>to be some you know, Jesus believer, you don't have

0:14:27.560 --> 0:14:32.720
<v Speaker 2>to be some fuck. These are very very simple sorts

0:14:32.800 --> 0:14:36.080
<v Speaker 2>of things that we can do to be the me

0:14:36.920 --> 0:14:37.880
<v Speaker 2>I want to be.