1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:04,560 Speaker 1: Welcome to another episode of Tell You What So Dubbs. Yeah, 2 00:00:04,559 --> 00:00:06,800 Speaker 1: this woman's putting her foot down to her husband. What's up? 3 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:07,680 Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah. 4 00:00:07,720 --> 00:00:11,160 Speaker 3: So there's a frustrated husband who's wondering if he's in 5 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:14,240 Speaker 3: the wrong for expecting his stay at home wife to 6 00:00:14,280 --> 00:00:17,120 Speaker 3: take care of their home since he's the one supporting her. 7 00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:18,919 Speaker 3: And she kind of put her foot down and said, no, 8 00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:21,840 Speaker 3: this is our home and even though I'm a stay 9 00:00:21,840 --> 00:00:25,320 Speaker 3: at home mom, that it should be fifty fifty as 10 00:00:25,360 --> 00:00:29,639 Speaker 3: far as household chores go. And she's saying that, boy, 11 00:00:30,080 --> 00:00:33,440 Speaker 3: you need to come home and do your line of 12 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:37,080 Speaker 3: household chores like I do mine. So why can't you 13 00:00:37,120 --> 00:00:39,159 Speaker 3: come home and do yours? Talk always have to be 14 00:00:39,159 --> 00:00:39,840 Speaker 3: one hundred percent? 15 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,159 Speaker 1: Hit up talk back on the iHeart Radio AB talk 16 00:00:42,240 --> 00:00:45,120 Speaker 1: back on the iHeart Radio Web. Here's my thought. Can 17 00:00:45,159 --> 00:00:46,800 Speaker 1: I throw mine out there real quick? Go for it? 18 00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,360 Speaker 1: My mom always said that. Her mom always said, meaning 19 00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:52,560 Speaker 1: my grandmother, my maternal side, that marriage is not fifty 20 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:55,520 Speaker 1: to fifty. Marriage is one hundred percent. Okay, both give 21 00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:58,639 Speaker 1: a hundred percent and life is good meaning you give 22 00:00:58,640 --> 00:01:00,280 Speaker 1: a hundred percent. She gives one hundred percent. It's not 23 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 1: like fifty to fifty. You don't draw lines and that 24 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 1: kind of saff You just do things. You just do it. 25 00:01:04,400 --> 00:01:07,920 Speaker 1: And my grandparents my parents and not so much, but 26 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:11,679 Speaker 1: my grandparents had really close to a perfect marriage. My 27 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:14,360 Speaker 1: mom's parents and my dad's parents for that matter, really 28 00:01:14,400 --> 00:01:17,319 Speaker 1: had great relationships and knew their roles and did lots 29 00:01:17,319 --> 00:01:20,120 Speaker 1: of things. Now, what I think to that is, I 30 00:01:20,160 --> 00:01:23,200 Speaker 1: think when you're a stay at home mom, I mean, 31 00:01:23,240 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 1: I think that's all I know is this. Steph was 32 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:27,679 Speaker 1: to stay at home mom for a while. Now she 33 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:31,560 Speaker 1: works in the school system. Yeah, dude, look at what 34 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:34,800 Speaker 1: we do. I'm not really grinding it out in here. 35 00:01:36,560 --> 00:01:36,720 Speaker 4: Now. 36 00:01:36,760 --> 00:01:38,120 Speaker 1: I want to get a little nap when I get 37 00:01:38,160 --> 00:01:40,880 Speaker 1: home because I've been up since the middle of the night. 38 00:01:41,400 --> 00:01:44,399 Speaker 1: But you gotta go home, and he got it. I 39 00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 1: think the kids, I think that is a way. I'm 40 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:48,960 Speaker 1: not trying to patronize to the audience, but in all seriousness, 41 00:01:49,000 --> 00:01:51,360 Speaker 1: that is a tough, tough deal. All the times that 42 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,040 Speaker 1: I've been home with the kids. I remember she took 43 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:55,840 Speaker 1: a girl's weekend once. Dude, I was gonna lose my mind. 44 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:56,320 Speaker 5: M h. 45 00:01:56,480 --> 00:01:58,960 Speaker 1: I mean, it's you just got You're always paying attention 46 00:01:59,040 --> 00:02:01,200 Speaker 1: you're always on guard. I mean it's like you might 47 00:02:01,240 --> 00:02:04,480 Speaker 1: as we you know, you're like a police officer or something, 48 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:06,120 Speaker 1: you know what I mean. You're always puking over your 49 00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:09,560 Speaker 1: shoulder and yet got to police the situation. You know 50 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:11,240 Speaker 1: what I mean. It's very stressful. I think being a 51 00:02:11,280 --> 00:02:13,639 Speaker 1: parent is very difficult. So I don't think you could 52 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:15,360 Speaker 1: just go home and put your feet up and have 53 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:17,880 Speaker 1: your wife making a cocktail. I just don't think that's no. 54 00:02:18,000 --> 00:02:20,000 Speaker 1: You can't get worked in nineteen fifties, and I still 55 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,480 Speaker 1: don't think it was right. What do you say? 56 00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:23,760 Speaker 3: But I do think if you are the stay at 57 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:27,320 Speaker 3: home parent, you should be doing majority of the housework. 58 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:30,120 Speaker 3: I know when I was laid off for at least 59 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:33,160 Speaker 3: six months, I was pretty much a stay at home 60 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:36,520 Speaker 3: dad taking care of Lena. Like I couldn't just sit 61 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:38,760 Speaker 3: on my button doing nothing because I'm like, okay, what 62 00:02:38,840 --> 00:02:41,040 Speaker 3: is there to do? And I would just clean the 63 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:44,320 Speaker 3: house because I wouldn't want Lauren to get home from work. 64 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:46,280 Speaker 3: She works forty hours a week. Last thing I want 65 00:02:46,320 --> 00:02:48,160 Speaker 3: her to do is come home to a dirty house 66 00:02:48,160 --> 00:02:50,080 Speaker 3: and then going what have you been doing all day? 67 00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:51,400 Speaker 3: Sitting around playing Xbox? 68 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:54,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, but you're also watching the child. Yeah, and there's 69 00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:57,000 Speaker 1: some things that Lauren could probably do too when she 70 00:02:57,080 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 1: gets now. I think when you get home, there has 71 00:02:58,919 --> 00:03:02,240 Speaker 1: to be that rest period, like at the swimming pool, 72 00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:04,440 Speaker 1: everybody out of the water for a ten rest period. 73 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:06,400 Speaker 1: You need like a half an hour to just kind 74 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:08,679 Speaker 1: of blow the steam off a little bit, and yeah, 75 00:03:08,720 --> 00:03:10,640 Speaker 1: grab something to eat or whatever, hang on the couch, 76 00:03:10,680 --> 00:03:12,440 Speaker 1: watch TV or look at your phone for a little bit, 77 00:03:12,440 --> 00:03:14,120 Speaker 1: and then you kind of got to, in my opinion, 78 00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:16,400 Speaker 1: get after it a little bit. Otherwise there's always animosity 79 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 1: for the household chores between the two. Am I right 80 00:03:18,639 --> 00:03:20,720 Speaker 1: or am I wrong? As Dub's right as Dubs wrong? 81 00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:24,359 Speaker 1: Talk back on the iheartradiop Does anybody else have a 82 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:27,400 Speaker 1: similar situation. I don't think when you're home watching the kids, 83 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:30,120 Speaker 1: I just I really don't think you're you're putting your 84 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:32,200 Speaker 1: feet up. You know what I remember doing when I 85 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 1: was home with them, you know, because step when Steph 86 00:03:34,080 --> 00:03:35,560 Speaker 1: was working and I was home with him for the 87 00:03:35,640 --> 00:03:38,880 Speaker 1: day before my shift back in the day here at 88 00:03:38,920 --> 00:03:43,760 Speaker 1: Camical two, I remember doing laundry incessantly. I was always 89 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:51,120 Speaker 1: doing laundry, especially with both boys, just constantly doing onesies, laundry, laundry, laundry, 90 00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:53,440 Speaker 1: and you're always cleaning up stuff, and there's always a spill, 91 00:03:53,480 --> 00:03:55,720 Speaker 1: and there's always something you know. But I think both 92 00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:57,960 Speaker 1: have to kind of give a hundred percent. But I 93 00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:00,960 Speaker 1: don't know does anybody feel differently? If you want to 94 00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,240 Speaker 1: drop it on talkback, you think that if the person 95 00:04:03,360 --> 00:04:06,480 Speaker 1: staying at home that is not necessarily the income for 96 00:04:06,520 --> 00:04:10,000 Speaker 1: the family is home watching the kids or whatever, do 97 00:04:10,040 --> 00:04:13,360 Speaker 1: you think that they have a right to say, Hey, 98 00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:14,960 Speaker 1: the moment you get home, I'm going to put you 99 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:20,200 Speaker 1: to work. I don't think so, only because they've been 100 00:04:20,240 --> 00:04:24,080 Speaker 1: working the whole day. I mean not saying that staying 101 00:04:24,120 --> 00:04:27,240 Speaker 1: at home watching the kids isn't working itself, because it 102 00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:29,560 Speaker 1: is depending on how old. 103 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:31,880 Speaker 3: Your kids are. But I feel like the stay at 104 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:36,240 Speaker 3: home parent should do most of the household work. 105 00:04:36,279 --> 00:04:39,359 Speaker 1: I think to stay at home parent is literally looking 106 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:44,680 Speaker 1: for some adult entertainment or that didn't make do work, 107 00:04:44,720 --> 00:04:47,159 Speaker 1: for some adult interaction or something when they get home 108 00:04:47,440 --> 00:04:50,279 Speaker 1: from the significant other, or to get out and be 109 00:04:50,360 --> 00:04:52,200 Speaker 1: with the girls or be with the guys or something, 110 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:54,440 Speaker 1: or just get out of the house. That's I feel 111 00:04:54,520 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 1: very strongly about that. I just think that when no 112 00:04:57,080 --> 00:04:59,200 Speaker 1: matter who it is, guy or gal that's out working 113 00:04:59,200 --> 00:05:02,480 Speaker 1: for a living, bring it on the income you're significant 114 00:05:02,480 --> 00:05:04,120 Speaker 1: others working for a living if they're taking care of 115 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:06,240 Speaker 1: the kids, and I think you gotta go home, take 116 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:08,240 Speaker 1: it half an hour, chill, and then I think you 117 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:11,120 Speaker 1: gotta get after Yeah, that's just that's my opinion. So 118 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:13,680 Speaker 1: le's say you talk back on the iHeartRadio app. 119 00:05:14,000 --> 00:05:16,960 Speaker 6: I think you said it right. Chris. You are home 120 00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 6: with the kids and you're like a police officer, you're 121 00:05:19,560 --> 00:05:24,279 Speaker 6: always on guard. But then you're also an EMT, a teacher, true, 122 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 6: a psychiatrist, among other things. So I think she's not wrong. 123 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:34,640 Speaker 6: He can help a little bit, whether it's starting laundry, 124 00:05:35,160 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 6: doing dishes, just kind of you live there too, Just 125 00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 6: chip in a little bit and you would be surprised 126 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:42,960 Speaker 6: how much that would make her day. 127 00:05:43,080 --> 00:05:44,480 Speaker 1: You're a good point, Thank you very much. 128 00:05:44,560 --> 00:05:48,040 Speaker 7: I feel like everybody is immediately hopefully going to come 129 00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,480 Speaker 7: to the mom's defense. But I will say I think 130 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:52,159 Speaker 7: it depends on what kind of stay at home mom 131 00:05:52,160 --> 00:05:54,440 Speaker 7: it is. And I don't say that to be mean. 132 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:56,679 Speaker 7: It's just like if her kids are in school, maybe 133 00:05:56,720 --> 00:05:59,800 Speaker 7: he has a point. But my recommendation is always like, 134 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:02,640 Speaker 7: make a list of everything that has to be done 135 00:06:02,680 --> 00:06:05,599 Speaker 7: to make your household run, and then go through and 136 00:06:05,640 --> 00:06:08,480 Speaker 7: put a time value on what it is. And in 137 00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:11,800 Speaker 7: my experience, every time mom's the winner and she does more, 138 00:06:11,920 --> 00:06:12,719 Speaker 7: I'm gonna vote. 139 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,200 Speaker 1: For that lady for president. That's good stuff right there. 140 00:06:15,279 --> 00:06:16,640 Speaker 1: Talk back on the iHeart. 141 00:06:16,279 --> 00:06:18,960 Speaker 4: App about whether a stay at home mom and someone 142 00:06:19,000 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 4: who works outside the home should split. 143 00:06:20,760 --> 00:06:21,640 Speaker 3: It fifty to fifty. 144 00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:24,320 Speaker 4: I don't believe that it should be fifty to fifty. 145 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,839 Speaker 4: I do believe it should be shared, but it should 146 00:06:26,880 --> 00:06:30,719 Speaker 4: just all depend on circumstance. Someone who's staying home has 147 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:34,000 Speaker 4: a chance to throw some laundry in, or load the dishwasher, 148 00:06:34,440 --> 00:06:35,480 Speaker 4: or have the kids. 149 00:06:35,279 --> 00:06:36,640 Speaker 3: Help clean up a little bit. 150 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,400 Speaker 4: But I don't think it should be that they do 151 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:43,119 Speaker 4: it all, or have dinner ready, or have different things done. 152 00:06:43,279 --> 00:06:45,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, just because you're gone all day and you're busting 153 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:46,960 Speaker 1: your butt doing your job, you still have a home 154 00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:48,760 Speaker 1: job too. You got to be able to both. You 155 00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 1: got to, I mean, you have to be able to 156 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:51,320 Speaker 1: help out at the same time. 157 00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:54,479 Speaker 5: So when my boyfriend and I do everything, because he's 158 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 5: a carpenter, so I mean he gets laid off, and 159 00:06:56,279 --> 00:06:59,000 Speaker 5: then he's technically a stay home dad, while I'm that 160 00:06:59,000 --> 00:07:01,880 Speaker 5: has the main amount of ink. We persue our relationship 161 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:04,200 Speaker 5: as fifty to fifty, but it's not fifty to fifty. 162 00:07:04,279 --> 00:07:06,760 Speaker 5: Sometimes he's gonna give sixty, I'm gonna give forty. Sometimes 163 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,839 Speaker 5: I'm gonna give seventy five, he's gonna give twenty five. 164 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:11,200 Speaker 5: You're staying at home with a kid who was not easy. 165 00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:14,400 Speaker 5: I've done it, he's done it. Kind of alternate sometimes, 166 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,640 Speaker 5: So I mean, I think it's responsibility on every party 167 00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:18,480 Speaker 5: in a relationship. 168 00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:20,640 Speaker 1: And you guys are like therapy, this is beautiful, all right. 169 00:07:20,680 --> 00:07:23,239 Speaker 1: Let's take a couple of ball real quick. Woman's at home. 170 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,920 Speaker 1: She does a lot at home, but she's like, okay, 171 00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:27,880 Speaker 1: just because you work all day and you're the income 172 00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:30,440 Speaker 1: for the household, hubby, you still have jobs to do 173 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:31,960 Speaker 1: here at home. Does he get a free pass because 174 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:34,280 Speaker 1: he works or does he not? Does he still have 175 00:07:34,320 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 1: to contribute? 176 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:39,360 Speaker 8: I work fifty five hours a week, sometimes sixty Monday 177 00:07:39,360 --> 00:07:41,920 Speaker 8: through Friday, and the wife stay at home. And we 178 00:07:42,000 --> 00:07:44,880 Speaker 8: got three kids, and she takes care of that, and 179 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:47,440 Speaker 8: she cleans the house for the most part, and everything. 180 00:07:47,520 --> 00:07:49,160 Speaker 8: And then one thing I got to do when I 181 00:07:49,240 --> 00:07:52,520 Speaker 8: get home is just do the dishes after dinner, little things. 182 00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:53,280 Speaker 1: But she does the. 183 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:54,800 Speaker 8: Majority of the housework and that works out good. 184 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:57,040 Speaker 1: And everybody's got a different opinion, and we'll take one 185 00:07:57,080 --> 00:07:57,440 Speaker 1: more for me. 186 00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:00,760 Speaker 2: Personally, I think whoever is to stay at home spouse 187 00:08:01,200 --> 00:08:04,640 Speaker 2: should do ninety five percent of everything. I nothing to 188 00:08:04,680 --> 00:08:07,360 Speaker 2: do about sex, because if the woman, if my woman was, 189 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:11,920 Speaker 2: I would do whatever she wanted. She'll come home to dinner, beer, wine, 190 00:08:12,000 --> 00:08:13,480 Speaker 2: whatever you want to be heard. You want to rub 191 00:08:13,520 --> 00:08:15,200 Speaker 2: your feet, you know, saying I have to think about 192 00:08:15,200 --> 00:08:17,600 Speaker 2: you all day and I expect that as well. Came 193 00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:19,480 Speaker 2: went too, is my country. I love you guys. Your 194 00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:21,760 Speaker 2: mom and grandma are angels of God, both of them. 195 00:08:21,800 --> 00:08:23,360 Speaker 1: Oh thank you. I love you guys. Talk back on 196 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:25,360 Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app. If you want to go for it, 197 00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:27,120 Speaker 1: we'd love to. Or if you want to, you know, 198 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:29,680 Speaker 1: take a little lot drop your opinion on this. With 199 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,480 Speaker 1: the wife standing at home saying, hey help me. Just 200 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:32,920 Speaker 1: because you work all day doesn't mean to come home 201 00:08:32,960 --> 00:08:34,480 Speaker 1: put your feet up. You got stuff to do. I 202 00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:36,840 Speaker 1: kind of side with her. Everybody's got stuff to do 203 00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:39,560 Speaker 1: the household and the work stuff yeah, two entirely different 204 00:08:39,559 --> 00:08:41,560 Speaker 1: deals and both have to be done right. Hey, thanks 205 00:08:41,559 --> 00:08:46,920 Speaker 1: for listening to this episode of Tell You What. Please rate, review, subscribe, download, share, 206 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:48,240 Speaker 1: and like. Thank you.