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Speaker 1: Mar Simone is back on seventy.

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Speaker 2: Well Timmy Taylor, the great talk show host, the excellent comedian.

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Speaker 2: He's on every night at nine o'clock on WR. You

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Speaker 2: can hear him from nine to Midnight's great show, very

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Speaker 2: funny and in addition to five nights a week here

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Speaker 2: on w R at nine o'clock, he does the best

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Speaker 2: late night show in television every Saturday night at ten

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Speaker 2: Fox News Channel, best monologue on TV. Donald Trump raves

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Speaker 2: about it. It's a great show. Watch at ten o'clock

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Speaker 2: Saturday nights, Fox News Channel. Jimmy Fayla, how you doing.

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Speaker 1: I'm doing better than Colbert? That's hell, I'm doing. What

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Speaker 1: a dumb stunt that was Mark Simone, Well, he lied

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Speaker 1: to it. He lied, Yes, He's like, yeah, they banned

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Speaker 1: me from having this guy on the show. And what

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Speaker 1: I love about it is the lawyers blew him up

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Speaker 1: as he was taping yesterday's episode that were the night

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Speaker 1: before they sent out the statement being like, oh, totally

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Speaker 1: have him on the show, and they just chose not to,

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Speaker 1: which is like he's trying to get fired because he

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Speaker 1: wants to be Basically, he wants to host the Oscars,

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Speaker 1: you know, like Kimmel, you know, kisses everybody's butt in Hollywood,

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Speaker 1: and that kind of makes him attractive to them. He

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Speaker 1: wants to get the Kimmel you know, leftovers when this

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Speaker 1: whole shebang shehbuins. Can you think of anything worse to

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Speaker 1: do with David Letterman's legacy than be trying to become

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Speaker 1: Jimmy Kimmel stunt double oh ugh Hey.

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Speaker 2: A couple articles this week about how he and Kimmel

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Speaker 2: have ruined Late Night. It used to be entertainment at night,

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Speaker 2: funny fun They turn it into like an angry, agenda

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Speaker 2: driven political nonsense. You on Saturday Night you're the closest

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Speaker 2: thing we have now to Johnny Carson. You do a

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Speaker 2: great monologue, but you go after both sides.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 2: It's balanced, isn't it.

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Speaker 1: Well, yeah, like you're supposed to be there to laugh.

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Speaker 1: That's the biggest crime for Colbert. It's not equal time

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Speaker 1: to Republicans. Needs to give equal time to comedy. Okay,

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Speaker 1: spend half of your show, just half of your show

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Speaker 1: making people laugh and then maybe doing you out the

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Speaker 1: other half, make a cooking segment. I don't care. But

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Speaker 1: the point is when we get on our show, there

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Speaker 1: is not a wasted word, like you'll never hear us

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Speaker 1: utter a word that's not aimed towards some type of

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Speaker 1: comedic outcome. Regardless of what you think of a joke.

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Speaker 1: We're just trying to have fun because the thing is

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Speaker 1: in comedy specifically, these are the rarest jobs in television. Like,

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Speaker 1: if you want a guy on TV making a serious

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Speaker 1: point or yelling about something, you have seven million of

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Speaker 1: those people. If you want a guy that's like legitimately

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Speaker 1: trying to make you laugh and is like, hey, I'm

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Speaker 1: a mess, so you know, light up, it's gonna be okay.

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Speaker 1: There's like three of us. There's not a lot of

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Speaker 1: us left. You know, it's you know, it's me obviously.

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Speaker 1: You know Guttfeld, our little comedy dwarf here at Fox.

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Speaker 1: He does fine, and you know, Gimmy Fallon, to his credit,

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Speaker 1: is trying to do a fun late night variety show.

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Speaker 1: Their lips sinking and they're playing games, they're doing things.

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Speaker 1: But they kind of Colbert and Kimmel ruined him because

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Speaker 1: they made him play their game. Like when Late Night

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Speaker 1: got political, you know, Fallon had to sit there for

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Speaker 1: a few years and pretend he cared, and he doesn't

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Speaker 1: care about anything except what time the bar opens.

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Speaker 2: You know, you're right, I can't picture Stephen Colbert doing

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Speaker 2: a cooking segment making fun of fun stuff with an animal.

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Speaker 2: You're right, you can't do any of that normal stuff.

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Speaker 2: So was he ever? No, he ever to stand up?

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Speaker 1: No? So what happened was he obviously, you know, got

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Speaker 1: his big break off of John Stewart on The Daily

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Speaker 1: Show because he was playing the character as you know,

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Speaker 1: that was basically impersonating like a right wing pundit. But

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Speaker 1: that was a character. You know, his actual personality is

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Speaker 1: pretty unlikable, and the truth is he's actually bad for real,

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Speaker 1: He's bad to comics. I'll give you two good examples. Okay,

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Speaker 1: you know when a you know, when a comedian does

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Speaker 1: a late night show like on Carson back in the day,

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Speaker 1: that would have been a career defining moment for a

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Speaker 1: comic if you went on Carson, had a good set,

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Speaker 1: he called you over to the couch. What Colbert does

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Speaker 1: back when he used to air stand ups, is he

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Speaker 1: would tape their stand up sets on a separate night.

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Speaker 1: He'd have like ten guys come into the theater and

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Speaker 1: do comedy sets. And he wasn't even there for them.

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Speaker 1: What so when you see, yes, when you see a

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Speaker 1: guy do stand up on Colbert, they're actually tossing to

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Speaker 1: a pre taped four minute package straight up. Like nobody

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Speaker 1: else does that. Kimmel doesn't do I mean, you know,

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Speaker 1: Fallon doesn't do that. Fallon's great, he's great the comics.

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Speaker 2: That's the most heard. That's horrible.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so think about it, like if Johnny Carson didn't

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Speaker 1: have you on the couch, you know, it wasn't the

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Speaker 1: best sign. But imagine Carson didn't even want to be

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Speaker 1: on the couch himself for your set. Forget you not

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Speaker 1: coming to the couch. He's not coming to the couch.

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Speaker 1: That's terrible.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 1: Hey, and I don't know if you go.

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Speaker 2: Ahead, no, go ahead.

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Speaker 1: I was gonna say. Fallon famously, when I got my

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Speaker 1: Late Night show sent me a really nice note and

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Speaker 1: a case of his Tonight show ice cream.

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Speaker 2: Wow, that's really nice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well it was a lot nicer than the

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Speaker 1: beg of Anthrax.

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Speaker 2: But hey, are you upset about the arrest of Prince Andrew?

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Speaker 1: Forgive me for this, because I did tweet this. I said,

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Speaker 1: he's at least he's finally looking at something over eighteen

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Speaker 1: there it is good guys, but really funny stuff. One

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Speaker 1: point I would make is it looks like he's getting

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Speaker 1: arrested for trade secrets. Yeah, so it's not necessarily even

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Speaker 1: all of the shady misconduct in malfeasans we've read about

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Speaker 1: down at Epstein Island so much as this is his

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Speaker 1: official capacity in the government. So this doesn't make me

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Speaker 1: more hopeful, meaning like that people here are going to

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Speaker 1: get arrested. I don't actually think that's going to happen

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Speaker 1: to you.

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Speaker 2: Well, here's the bad thing though. He's apparently still in

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Speaker 2: custody eight hours later, and it said that the police

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Speaker 2: have now at both his homes are now searching. You know,

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Speaker 2: they'll go through his Can you imagine what they're going

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Speaker 2: to find on that hole?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? That guy? I mean like, like, you know, it's

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Speaker 1: bad when Hunter Biden's nervous about what they're gonna find

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Speaker 1: on your last top.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I don't know about the fan crew guy. That's not

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Speaker 1: good yea wow.

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Speaker 2: Hey mom, Donnie. Remember when he was running he was

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Speaker 2: so charming, smile and a great salesman who was just

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Speaker 2: Now he's in office, he looks like the most bumbling

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Speaker 2: idiot in the world and know what to do. What

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Speaker 2: happened to smile? What happened all the promises?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, maybe more importantly, what happened to the cop.

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Speaker 1: This is crazy. Yeah, listen, we're we didn't vote for this, okay, obviously,

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Speaker 1: but the people who did are getting what we told

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Speaker 1: them they would get. Okay, it was always a fraud

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Speaker 1: from word one. He was a catchy TikTok guy. But

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Speaker 1: there's a lot of catchy TikTok guy. You know what

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Speaker 1: I'm saying. There's a guy on TikTok right now who

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Speaker 1: slow dances with a cat get ten million people click like,

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Speaker 1: doesn't mean he should be in charge of our city

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Speaker 1: and gentlemen. And that's the problem with electing a fancy

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Speaker 1: TikTok guy. Is this jackass who you know, as you know,

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Speaker 1: was going to freeze the rents is now jackie up

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Speaker 1: property taxes, which as you know, is going to raise

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Speaker 1: the rents. Wow, So the opposite of everything he was promised,

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Speaker 1: and me and you called it out because remember when

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Speaker 1: he won, we were on here that week joking about

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Speaker 1: how he had a cash bar at his victory point.

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Speaker 1: So if the guy ran on free healthcare, free groceries,

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Speaker 1: free everything else, and he's charging you twelve bucks for

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Speaker 1: a bud light. Yeah, something tells me you're not getting

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Speaker 1: a ride home on a free bus.

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Speaker 2: Py the Mamdani of a few years ago. AOC goes

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Speaker 2: to this European conference. She's asked the most basic, simple

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Speaker 2: foreign policy question, and I knew she was stupid. But

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Speaker 2: did you know she was that stupid to give that

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Speaker 2: dumbin answer. No, I you know, I realized she had

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Speaker 2: gone to college.

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Speaker 1: I just I didn't know she was a valedictorian at

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Speaker 1: the Quality Leering Center out in Minneapolis. Turns out she

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Speaker 1: graduated at the head of that class.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Uh um.

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Speaker 2: So I think the only one that liked that speech

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Speaker 2: was Chuck Schumer well as probably more nervous because now

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Speaker 2: she probably screwed up any presidential chance, which means all she.

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Speaker 1: Can do is y Yeah, and now she probably has

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Speaker 1: to go Senate and run against Chucky and he's got

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Speaker 1: to keep lying to us about voter I data to

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Speaker 1: see that clip this week from ninety six of him

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Speaker 1: being like, we have to have ID because all of

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Speaker 1: these immigrants are committing frauds. No one's even trying anymore

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Speaker 1: in that party. That's my frustration. I have a lot

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Speaker 1: of good Democrat friends, and they're so much better than

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Speaker 1: the politicians who represent them, and I think that's what

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Speaker 1: we need. We just need more of an effort because

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Speaker 1: they're all lazy. Like again, AOC flying to a foreign

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Speaker 1: policy conference. Okay, if you don't understand basic foreign policy,

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Speaker 1: like you had the whole flight over there to spend

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Speaker 1: five minutes, put down your Netflix on your iPad.

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Speaker 2: And read a book.

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Speaker 1: Imagine me, and you went to the Olive Garden convention

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Speaker 1: and they asked us about breadsticks and we didn't know

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Speaker 1: what to say for forty five seconds, Like it's just laziness, Mark,

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Speaker 1: you know what it is?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Hey, And Chuck Schumer, is he the biggest racist

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Speaker 2: on earth? To actually say minority voters why they can't

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Speaker 2: figure out how to get an idea? They wouldn't know

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Speaker 2: how to get it? What a racist thing to say?

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Speaker 2: How does he get away with that? It really is.

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Speaker 1: It drives me crazy because comics get in trouble for

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Speaker 1: telling jokes this is and they're like, well that joke's

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Speaker 1: gone of insult, but it's a joke, like the premises

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Speaker 1: were kidding he's not kidding. He's getting on TV and saying,

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Speaker 1: these people don't know how in the year twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 1: Okay again, if black people don't have ID, that means

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Speaker 1: the movie Snakes on a Plane is Snakes and an

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Speaker 1: uber or something, because you can't even get on the plane. Okay,

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Speaker 1: that's the point. Damuel Jackson is just standing outside of

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Speaker 1: the airport because he can't get in.

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Speaker 2: Unbelievable. Well, hey, you got to listen to Jimmy Faile

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Speaker 2: on the radio every night at nine o'clock, nine to midnight.

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Speaker 2: It's a great show, very funny, does a great What

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Speaker 2: do you have on tonight at at nine.

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Speaker 1: Ooh, we got a locker on on. Comedian Dave Landale

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Speaker 1: is going to be here. Wesley Hunt's coming by because

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Speaker 1: see many other candidates. Yeah, and he's running as a

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Speaker 1: Republican in the Senate in Texas, so he technically is

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Speaker 1: involved in this cold Bear fiasco. And then tomorrow we

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Speaker 1: got Tom Holman in studios, so I got to tell

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Speaker 1: my staff to hide their drugs.

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Speaker 2: Well, Tom Holman is always great. Nobody better with them

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Speaker 2: than you. So that's uh, every night nine to midnight

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Speaker 2: here on WR and make sure you watch his late

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Speaker 2: night TV show Saturday Nights at ten, best late night

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Speaker 2: show on television. It's too early to know what you're

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Speaker 2: going to do Saturday night, is it?

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Speaker 1: Oh? We got John Taffer from bar Rescue on Oh

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Speaker 1: and assuming we don't bomb a ran were talking about

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Speaker 1: bar Rescue stuff. So we're ready to go. If everybody

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Speaker 1: ever wants to come, your audience shows up to my

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Speaker 1: show like crazy, it's Fox across America dot com. If

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Speaker 1: you want free tickets to Foxer Saturday Night, Fox across

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Speaker 1: America dot com. Yeah, and feel free to bring up

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Speaker 1: Mark because they all do. Everybody comings like Oh, I

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Speaker 1: was listen and John Simone, I'm.

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Speaker 2: Like, hey, thanks, you want to you want a great date?

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Speaker 2: You're coming in the city with somebody. You can get

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Speaker 2: free tickets to see Jimmy Faylis. You can be in

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Speaker 2: the audience Fox say it again, Fox across America dot.

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Speaker 1: Com, Fox across America dot Com, Fox.

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Speaker 2: Across America dot Com. Get the tickets there and listen

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Speaker 2: to Jimmy Fayler tonight at nine on w o R.

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Speaker 2: Jimmy Fayler, thanks for being with us.

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Speaker 1: You're the best. Mark.

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Speaker 2: Take care, brother, Take care Yeah, he's coming up tonight,

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Speaker 2: Great Show, nine o'clock on seven to ten WO R