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Speaker 1: You're listening to kfi Am six forty on demand. Being teachable.

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Speaker 2: It may not be something that you think about often,

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Speaker 2: but the man or woman who wants to grow in

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Speaker 2: their faith, in their walk with God, if you want

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Speaker 2: to be that person, you have to be teachable. To

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Speaker 2: go through life in stubborn fashion, shutting yourself off to

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Speaker 2: any of the thoughts or ideas, it could be a problem.

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Speaker 1: You lose out on much.

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Speaker 2: And what I'm not saying is to go around with

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Speaker 2: such an open mind that your brain falls out. You see,

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Speaker 2: an open mind is like that of an open mouth.

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Speaker 2: It's open, it receives sustenance, it closes to digest. I'm

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Speaker 2: not talking about the lack of conviction, not standing on

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Speaker 2: a principal idea or understanding. What I'm saying is that

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Speaker 2: if you go around thinking that your glass is full,

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Speaker 2: you won't ever let anyone pour anything into it, and

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Speaker 2: in doing so, you'll miss out on new knowledge, new ideas,

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Speaker 2: new understandings. And this process is so important to your

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Speaker 2: faith because faith it is in conjunction with knowledge that

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Speaker 2: if you shut yourself out to that kind of teachability

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Speaker 2: being available for these new ideas, you lose out Scripture

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Speaker 2: is even a little more fierce when it says in

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Speaker 2: Proverbs twelve to one whoever loves discipline loves knowledge, but

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Speaker 2: he who hates reproof is stupid. You see, you have

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Speaker 2: to be willing to hear truth. You have to be

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Speaker 2: willing to know that you may not have the truth,

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Speaker 2: the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Being open

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Speaker 2: to receiving that and learning those new things puts you

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Speaker 2: on the path like an explorer of finding out this information.

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Speaker 2: I tell people all the time, don't follow the person

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Speaker 2: who says they know everything. Follow the person who's asking

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Speaker 2: all the right questions, because the truth seeker asks questions.

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Speaker 2: An old Chinese proverb that says that he who asks

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Speaker 2: a question is a fool for five minutes. He who

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Speaker 2: doesn't ask the question is a fool for a lifetime.

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Speaker 2: Now I realize there are people that you may think

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Speaker 2: can't teach anything. Abraham Lincoln said that he learned something

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Speaker 2: from every man he met. It was usually what not

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Speaker 2: to do, but he learned something. Now in life, as

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Speaker 2: you stroll along on your adventure exploring and learning, there

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Speaker 2: are certain things, yes, that you may put into a

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Speaker 2: pouch labeled certain, but there are always new ideas, new

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Speaker 2: ways to look at things, new ways to perceive an

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Speaker 2: old thing. And that comes from being open, That comes

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Speaker 2: from being pliable and receptive to what's out there. There's

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Speaker 2: oftentimes where I'm trying to teach you something or I

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Speaker 2: want you to know something, and you refuse to receive

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Speaker 2: it because you think you're better than the person trying

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Speaker 2: to impart it to you. I want you to be open.

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Speaker 2: I want you to get to a place where you

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Speaker 2: thirst so much for truth that it doesn't matter where

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Speaker 2: you get it. You've seen people so hungry that they

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Speaker 2: respect food like you never have every morsel, they clean

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Speaker 2: their plate, They are so appreciative for every last bite.

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Speaker 2: When you're fat, you're like, well, I don't need that

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Speaker 2: last bed or or you know, I'll throw that away,

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Speaker 2: or I'll give it to the dog, almost without the

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Speaker 2: true appreciation for what's before you. And the same can

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Speaker 2: work with knowledge. You may get to a place where

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Speaker 2: you think you know so much.

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Speaker 1: That you don't.

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Speaker 2: You don't respect, you don't hunger for knowledge.

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Speaker 1: The same way.

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Speaker 2: I see professors all the time go through change. Professors

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Speaker 2: who were very learned, they had consumed much knowledge, and

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Speaker 2: all of a sudden something came into their life and

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Speaker 2: changed their perspective. They got to see things just a

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Speaker 2: little differently, and the hunger, that fire, that desire burned again.

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Speaker 1: Today. I want you to be in that same place today.

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Speaker 2: I want you to thirst today. I want you to

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Speaker 2: have that mindset that isn't listen to me, but I

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Speaker 2: will listen to you.

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Speaker 1: That place of.

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Speaker 2: Security where you are listening, where you are wanting to receive.

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Speaker 1: Being the student is the best seat to learn now.

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Speaker 2: Teaching can be a great place of learning as well

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Speaker 2: if you are open, if you remain like a sponge

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Speaker 2: and check your vocabulary and the things you say. Do

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Speaker 2: you often ask ask people's opinion on things? And do

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Speaker 2: you ask it for real or do you ask it

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Speaker 2: because you think you should or because you really want

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Speaker 2: to receive what they have to say? Are you the

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Speaker 2: type of person that just merely offers your opinion.

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Speaker 1: Rather than receives.

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Speaker 2: Before someone finishes a sentence?

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Speaker 1: Are you building a response being teachable? Today?

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Speaker 2: I want you to ask yourself, am I self?

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Speaker 1: I guess if.

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Speaker 2: You'd like to refer to yourself as self self?

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Speaker 1: Am I teachable?

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Speaker 2: And the importance of this question cannot be overstated, because

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Speaker 2: this really is at the beginning of who you are,

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Speaker 2: what you will know in life, how you will know it,

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Speaker 2: and even how you'll be perceived by others, if they

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Speaker 2: will see you as somebody who just rejects or someone

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Speaker 2: who thinks there know it all. And having that platform

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Speaker 2: as a seeker, having that platform at somebody who genuinely

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Speaker 2: explores life and wants to learn, that is the best

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Speaker 2: place to be. That is where you will get to

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Speaker 2: know God. You'll get to know God through God's creation.

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Speaker 2: I want you to know me and one of the

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Speaker 2: best ways to know me.

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Speaker 1: Is to know the family.

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Speaker 2: Now, I don't want you living your spirituality through someone else,

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Speaker 2: because people will let you down. But you will see,

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Speaker 2: and you will know, and you will learn things from others.

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Speaker 2: And getting in that mindset to love discipline, as it

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Speaker 2: says Proverbs twelve to one, whoever loves discipline loves knowledge.

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Speaker 2: But he who hates reproof is stupid. Are you bothered

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Speaker 2: when somebody comes to you and corrects you constructively? I

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Speaker 2: realize that there are those that take on the tone

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Speaker 2: and the attitude and they're ugly about it, and that

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Speaker 2: it's hard to receive that.

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Speaker 1: I understand that.

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Speaker 2: But I also want you to get to that place

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Speaker 2: where you have the sense of an old cow. You

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Speaker 2: eat the hay and you leave the sticks. You can

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Speaker 2: weed through these things and understand that there's a difference

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Speaker 2: between someone's attitude and the truth and if what they're

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Speaker 2: telling you is beneficial if you can learn from it.

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Speaker 2: But how exciting has it been throughout your life those

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Speaker 2: times where you've come you've had an epiphany, or you've

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Speaker 2: learned something that has changed the way you do something.

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Speaker 2: For men, it's when they finally look at the instructions

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Speaker 2: after trying to put something together for the past twelve hours.

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Speaker 1: On their own. I say that with love.

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Speaker 2: Men, But you may come across some sort of moment.

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Speaker 2: You may remember throughout your life a good teacher, someone

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Speaker 2: who took the time with you and spoke to you

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Speaker 2: on your level, and how wonderful it was to take

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Speaker 2: that knowledge. And I want you to get to that

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Speaker 2: place today. I want you to remind yourself to be

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Speaker 2: in that spirit every single day, being that explorer, being

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Speaker 2: willing to learn new ways, not being stubborn or a

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Speaker 2: pushy that everyone needs to see things your way. Oh,

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Speaker 2: you'll play a part in cycle. You'll be teaching others too,

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Speaker 2: but you have to be ready, willing, and able for

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Speaker 2: that report proof. It's not just ignoring reproof. It's not

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Speaker 2: just being bothered by reproof. In Scripture, it says you

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Speaker 2: hate reproof, you can't stand when someone corrects you. You're

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Speaker 2: always in that place where you refuse to be teachable,

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Speaker 2: and today I want you to be teachable. It's okay

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Speaker 2: to make mistakes. Scripture says that a righteous man is

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Speaker 2: not someone who doesn't fall, but someone who falls seven

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Speaker 2: times and seven times gets up. It's okay to make

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Speaker 2: mistakes as long as you learn from them, as long

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Speaker 2: as you are open to whatever reproof, whatever teaching moment.

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Speaker 1: That is.

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Speaker 2: The world is getting to a place where you are

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Speaker 2: looking with the internet, with all the technology, where you

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Speaker 2: can replay somebody's statement and thoughts over and over and

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Speaker 2: over again. The world is loving to pounce upon those

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Speaker 2: thoughts rather than showing reproof, wanting to solidify those as

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Speaker 2: the only thought that person's ever had, that mistakes aren't

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Speaker 2: actually made. Don't get to that place. Don't get to

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Speaker 2: that place of hardening the heart towards somebody else or

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Speaker 2: even with your own self. Towards others, you feel that

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Speaker 2: they are not teachable, that they can't learn, that that's

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Speaker 2: only who they are. And with yourself, thinking that you

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Speaker 2: know everything, that you're so well learned that you don't

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Speaker 2: need to consume anymore from anyone, and that becomes the

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Speaker 2: hating of reproof and that's what makes you stupid.

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Speaker 1: Moses, Hello, welcome to Jesus Christ show.

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Speaker 3: Well, how are you, Lamb of God.

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Speaker 1: I'm wonderful.

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Speaker 3: How are you on your reconciliation themed It's not necessarily

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Speaker 3: a question of reconciliation. Fact, it's not. It's a matter

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Speaker 3: of forgiveness, reference to the Ephesians passage. It's got me thinking,

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Speaker 3: I'm in a position where I have split from a relationship,

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Speaker 3: a long term relationship. There are many children from that relationship,

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Speaker 3: some of them. One of them in particular, is of

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Speaker 3: the Marian age now and is engaged to get married

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Speaker 3: and there's going to be a wedding, and the other

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Speaker 3: side their mother can't come around. There can't. It's not

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Speaker 3: reconciliation that I'm seeking, it's just let there be peace.

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Speaker 3: And I was suggesting to the call screen that maybe

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Speaker 3: there's a guilt factor for me because I feel like

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Speaker 3: I've done all the the attempts to mend and make

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Speaker 3: things right and go forward, and there's something that nags

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Speaker 3: at the back of my brain because there's no forgiveness

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Speaker 3: that's forthcoming. I know I'm not entitled to it.

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Speaker 2: Well, okay, so you were in a relationship, yes, and

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Speaker 2: kids were in the middle of it, as they always are.

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Speaker 2: And those kids are getting to a place in a

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Speaker 2: time in their life when they're going to need both

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Speaker 2: you and her in the same place at the same

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Speaker 2: time for the same.

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Speaker 3: Reason, or at least that there be peaceful contact, normal

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Speaker 3: existing you know what people do when they get together.

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Speaker 3: For other divorced families joined the middle.

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Speaker 1: And what caused the divorce, What caused the.

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Speaker 3: Divorce multiple things, but I will it.

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Speaker 1: Was always a big thing.

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Speaker 3: I will say that they were there were chemical issues involved, okay.

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Speaker 2: And so somebody was an addict or somebody had, you know,

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Speaker 2: serotonin issues both sides.

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Speaker 3: One was one was alcohol and one was marijuana.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 2: And was this uh uh? Were you the one that

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Speaker 2: was partaking in the alcohol or the marijuana?

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Speaker 3: I was the alcohol and she was the pot.

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Speaker 1: Okay? And uh are you an alcoholic?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: Okay? Recovering. Yeah, good boy.

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Speaker 2: And so you both were using depressants, uh, which can

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Speaker 2: be a huge problem. Were you using them at the

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Speaker 2: beginning of the relationship as well?

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Speaker 3: So did you did you think for that purpose?

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Speaker 2: I mean, you know, alcoholism can take a while. Sometimes

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Speaker 2: it's you. When you guys met, were you both partaking

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Speaker 2: in alcohol and pot?

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Speaker 3: Yes?

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Speaker 2: Okay, so you both knew it was there? Well, how

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Speaker 2: does that become the problem? It just accelerated.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think I think life issues, the circumstances of

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Speaker 3: sort of being caught into all of a sudden. One

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Speaker 3: child became four, became five, became six, and then I'm

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Speaker 3: not really sure. It's hard to be it's hard to

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Speaker 3: be even honest attempting to be honest about it. It's

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Speaker 3: I look back, and part of it is I can't

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Speaker 3: quite figure out exactly, but I know that I've taken

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Speaker 3: the lion's share of the blame from all parties, the

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Speaker 3: extended family, on both sides.

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Speaker 2: Well, you must admit alcoholism rears its head much differently

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Speaker 2: than the abuse of marijuana.

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Speaker 3: Yes, it does. I mean, well, Jesus, I'm at the

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Speaker 3: point where I've gone through so many steps and so

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Speaker 3: many measures that I feel very comfortable, in fact, comfortable

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Speaker 3: enough to make a phone call.

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Speaker 2: Okay, but what about amends.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's part of the.

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Speaker 3: Stepsil that's the problem. I've made the gestures and attempts

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Speaker 3: just for just for the sake of what's going to

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Speaker 3: be happening. I've got a wedding coming, for example, with

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Speaker 3: my oldest daughter, and I look to the future of

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Speaker 3: seeing other things coming down the line, other events and grandchildren.

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Speaker 3: It's just a matter of I'm done, I'm I'm contented

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Speaker 3: in my reconciliation forward, but there's just a hole that

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Speaker 3: and I don't I don't want anything from her necessarily

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Speaker 3: because it's never going to come. But I need something

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Speaker 3: that makes me look straight ahead and go forward.

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Speaker 2: Okay, And I think that's a healthy place to be.

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Speaker 2: One quick thing, and then then we'll point.

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Speaker 1: It back to this.

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Speaker 2: If I asked her, if I had her her on

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Speaker 2: the phone, your ex wife, and I asked her.

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Speaker 1: Why you got a divorce?

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Speaker 2: What would what would she say?

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Speaker 3: I really don't know that.

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Speaker 2: What's the thing that she hates most about you?

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Speaker 3: Meanness?

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Speaker 2: She says that you're mean, You were a mean drunk.

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Speaker 3: Not necessarily didn't have to be involved drinking at all.

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Speaker 2: You're just a mean human being. Yeah, okay, and how

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Speaker 2: does that manifest? Did you ever hit her or harm

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Speaker 2: her physically? No, you paused a moment there, did you?

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Speaker 2: Were you mean to her? I was ugly and dark.

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Speaker 3: I was rolling the eyes in the back of my

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Speaker 3: head and searching the memory banks there were it was,

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Speaker 3: believe it or not, it was the other way around.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 2: So she would be physical towards you because something you

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Speaker 2: did would hurt her or make her lash out. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: whether it was the way you talked to her, and

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Speaker 2: I'm not condoning in any way ship for him trying

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Speaker 2: to find the mechanics of it, and yeah, that was

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Speaker 2: I hate.

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Speaker 3: To say it and minimize it, but the reality is,

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Speaker 3: over twelve year period of time, there was there's three

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Speaker 3: things that I can recall, three incidents. I don't I

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Speaker 3: don't mean to minimize it, but it doesn't It didn't seem.

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Speaker 2: To me that that was And these incidences were provoked

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Speaker 2: by you. This was something that you were. You had

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Speaker 2: called her names or you had done something to Would

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Speaker 2: you say hurtful things like about who she was as

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Speaker 2: a person and things like that? Yeah, those can be

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Speaker 2: those can be very deep cutting. So I'm going to

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Speaker 2: say this, Moses, Uh. First of all, you seem to

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Speaker 2: want to grow in the in the right direction. I

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Speaker 2: think that's healthy. You've obviously made leaps and bounds in

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Speaker 2: your own life, getting rid of the alcohol, going through

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Speaker 2: steps and learning what those steps are, and knowing that

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Speaker 2: that making amends is going to be one of them.

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Speaker 2: You're absolutely right in the sense that you can't you

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Speaker 2: can't play both sides. You can't be her side of

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Speaker 2: the relationship in yours. If you reference to Fesians that

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Speaker 2: we spoke about earlier Ephesians four three, four thirty one,

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Speaker 2: and thirty two, rather says get rid of all bitterness,

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Speaker 2: rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form

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Speaker 2: of malice, be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving

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Speaker 2: each other just as Christ Christ God forgave you. So

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Speaker 2: if that's where you are, great, you can't do that

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Speaker 2: for her as well. I would say, one last ditch

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Speaker 2: effort to reach out, maybe by way of letter, because

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Speaker 2: there's no arguing there, and not email necessarily, but a

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Speaker 2: physical letter that she can hold in her hands, where

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Speaker 2: you say, simply not drawn out. We've gone through some

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Speaker 2: ugly times, and I've taken responsibility for the ugliness that

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Speaker 2: I brought into the real relationship. And although we may

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Speaker 2: not agree on everything across the board, we will agree

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Speaker 2: on the beauty of the children that we brought into

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Speaker 2: this world and that we raised, and as they grow

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Speaker 2: and have special days like marriages, let us agree to

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Speaker 2: come together during.

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Speaker 1: These times and be civil and grown in a.

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Speaker 2: Way that will reflect who they are in our lives

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Speaker 2: and not who we are in each other's lives.

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Speaker 1: And then, having done that, cross it off.

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Speaker 2: Regardless of her response, Cross it off your list, because

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Speaker 2: there's a point where people harden their heart, as we

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Speaker 2: talked about earlier, and you cannot be accountable for that. Beth,

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Jesus.

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Speaker 1: Christ Show, Shalem. How can I help you?

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Speaker 4: Oh Jesus, I have a problem. I'm fifty two years

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Speaker 4: old and I've been diagnosed with a brain Oh hold

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Speaker 4: on a second. This is part of the problem, brain atrophy, Okay,

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Speaker 4: And I'm losing function in my legs and I slur

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Speaker 4: my words and I don't always make myself clear and

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Speaker 4: I'm just not ready for the physicality of it.

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Speaker 2: Well, how could you be? You know those things. It's

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Speaker 2: a it's a very weighty thought to put on your lap,

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Speaker 2: isn't it the concept of losing things or dealing with

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Speaker 2: life threatening illnesses.

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Speaker 4: I'm not looking forward to the furthering of the dementia,

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Speaker 4: would I.

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Speaker 1: Would think not?

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Speaker 2: And you have doctors that are talking you through this

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Speaker 2: and what it will mean.

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Speaker 4: Yes?

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Speaker 2: And are you on your own or are there family

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Speaker 2: in your life?

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Speaker 4: I have family, but they're rather distant.

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Speaker 2: Is that a new development or has it always been

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Speaker 2: that way?

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Speaker 4: It's always been that way.

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Speaker 1: Why do you think that is?

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Speaker 4: Oh, it's just the way my family is. I have

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Speaker 4: no exploite, just.

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Speaker 1: Distant by nature.

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Speaker 4: Yes.

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Speaker 2: Okay, So now you're in this place, So you're you're

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Speaker 2: you're You're obviously very strong. You've lived a life with

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Speaker 2: some distance with family and and that must suit you

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Speaker 2: to some degree as well, because you're a part of

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Speaker 2: that relationship. So you've got strength and the ability to

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Speaker 2: deal with many things. This isn't the first bump in

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Speaker 2: your life, correct, correct? This is just one that is

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Speaker 2: incredibly unknown, and the unknown causes fear, right, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: and having.

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Speaker 1: To go through that.

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Speaker 2: There's nothing scarier to many people than the con concept

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Speaker 2: of losing your faculties your ability to think and process,

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Speaker 2: and how that must be true. But the opportunity now

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Speaker 2: to take the time to write things down, or if

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Speaker 2: you have a video camera to videotape them to leave.

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Speaker 2: I would recommend the writing just because of the therapy involved,

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Speaker 2: and it can be very cathartic to write down your

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Speaker 2: thoughts and the things that you're going through as you

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Speaker 2: experience them. I think could be quite comforting. In addition

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Speaker 2: to the basics, you know, I'm going to say to

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Speaker 2: pray and to read scripture and use the psalms and

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Speaker 2: the like to comfort you in times of pain or confusion.

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Speaker 2: There's not going to be an easy way. There's an

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Speaker 2: old saying everyone wants to go to heaven, nobody wants

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Speaker 2: to die. Nothing easy about the decaying of humanness and

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Speaker 2: the process of dying in any form, whether it be

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Speaker 2: starting for a mental place or a physical place, or

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Speaker 2: any of these things. It's never going to be a

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Speaker 2: pleasant thing, and you just have to trust that God's

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Speaker 2: going to bring you through it.

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Speaker 1: In a way.

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Speaker 2: That that keeps you from having to deal with too much.

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Speaker 2: But whatever you do go through, there is a purpose

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Speaker 2: to you do you understand that that to God, there's

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Speaker 2: a purpose.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I understand.

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Speaker 2: And it's not it's not punitive or punishment or anything

378
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Speaker 2: like that. It's it's the natural process, a process that

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Speaker 2: you may not have known specifically, but you knew you

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Speaker 2: were going to go through things where you were going

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Speaker 2: to deteriorate.

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Speaker 4: I never expected this.

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Speaker 2: Well, no one ever expects exactly the way it goes down.

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Speaker 2: It's an interesting thing, Beth from you know, the first

385
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Speaker 2: time you had a pet or something, a goldfish, anything

386
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Speaker 2: like that and they passed, or the first time some

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Speaker 2: a loved one passes. That death is one of those

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Speaker 2: things that not only in movies and television and in

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Speaker 2: books and everything else, is thought about and read about,

390
00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,080
Speaker 2: heard about every single day of your life when you

391
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Speaker 2: come to the age of understanding. Yet it's it's always

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Speaker 2: going to be a surprise the way it happens. When

393
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Speaker 2: it happens, all those things are going to be a surprise.

394
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Speaker 2: And the best thing to do is to do it

395
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Speaker 2: is to go through it with the most amount of race,

396
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Speaker 2: always looking towards God for guidance and comfort, and do

397
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Speaker 2: it with the most amount of understanding, and you know

398
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Speaker 2: you're not gone yet you have the ability to pick

399
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Speaker 2: up the phone and talk to me and be articulate.

400
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Speaker 4: Yes, so I'm losing that ability a little at.

401
00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:48,760
Speaker 2: A time, so is everyone else. Yours just might be

402
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:54,560
Speaker 2: more noticeable for now, but everybody's going through it. There's

403
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Speaker 2: a sign that hangs in my producer's office that says,

404
00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 2: he who lives the longest or the healthiest person is

405
00:27:02,880 --> 00:27:08,760
Speaker 2: dying the slowest. But they're all dying, and everybody's experiencing that.

406
00:27:08,760 --> 00:27:12,840
Speaker 2: That's experiencing that from day one. But I would say

407
00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:19,119
Speaker 2: to to not to delay life. Experience every moment, you know,

408
00:27:19,359 --> 00:27:22,399
Speaker 2: enjoy every little moment of it. Write things down, Write

409
00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:26,000
Speaker 2: down memories, things that were important to you and that

410
00:27:26,080 --> 00:27:30,159
Speaker 2: are important to you, people that you've met, stories that

411
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:31,520
Speaker 2: you can now recall.

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Speaker 1: Write them down.

413
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Speaker 4: Yes, that sounds good.

414
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Speaker 2: It just ends up being ends up being something tangible. Beth,

415
00:27:39,359 --> 00:27:42,480
Speaker 2: and I think that tangibility would be helpful right now

416
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:46,840
Speaker 2: and therefore at times where you can't remember something or

417
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 2: something slips away, to have it there in written form,

418
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Speaker 2: and to enjoy them as you can.

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Speaker 1: For as long as you can. KFI A six on demand.

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Speaker 3: Yes,