1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:02,280 Speaker 1: Try to make it a happy Friday, and by way 2 00:00:02,400 --> 00:00:05,440 Speaker 1: of relativity, may find out your Friday is going much 3 00:00:05,440 --> 00:00:08,640 Speaker 1: better than you anticipated because you didn't live the rather 4 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:12,360 Speaker 1: tragic life of My next guest Rebecca Lafferty, who's joined 5 00:00:12,360 --> 00:00:14,160 Speaker 1: the Proger to talk about her new book, The Lafferty 6 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:18,800 Speaker 1: Girl Surviving Trauma, Abuse and My Father's Crimes, a Mormon 7 00:00:18,960 --> 00:00:21,960 Speaker 1: daughter's story. Rebecca, Welcome to the fifty five Carsy Morning Show. 8 00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 1: It's a pleasure having you on today. 9 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:25,400 Speaker 2: Thank you, Thank you. 10 00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:28,760 Speaker 1: It's pleasure well, and I say pleasure knowing full well 11 00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:32,559 Speaker 1: your experience as a child, which you write about in 12 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:36,000 Speaker 1: this book. Your father was a rather troubled individual, and 13 00:00:36,000 --> 00:00:38,120 Speaker 1: that may be an understatement from your perspective. You can 14 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:41,320 Speaker 1: elaborate on that. Let my listeners know about you and 15 00:00:41,520 --> 00:00:44,720 Speaker 1: I guess around seven years old. You're apparently your dad 16 00:00:44,920 --> 00:00:47,479 Speaker 1: got radicalized in a certain way. Let's talk about that. 17 00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:48,280 Speaker 1: Let my listeners know. 18 00:00:50,360 --> 00:00:53,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, well, my father he was you know, he was 19 00:00:53,440 --> 00:00:55,840 Speaker 2: raised in kind of a strict household himself, and so 20 00:00:55,920 --> 00:01:01,000 Speaker 2: he raised us kids very very strict with LDS. We 21 00:01:01,200 --> 00:01:04,400 Speaker 2: follow that to the t. You know, he tried to 22 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:07,440 Speaker 2: do everything to the tea and what that was like 23 00:01:07,520 --> 00:01:10,560 Speaker 2: for me, the child was very There's a lot of 24 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:15,240 Speaker 2: violence in our home, and I would say correction was 25 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:19,800 Speaker 2: over the top for a child. And he also believed 26 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:22,880 Speaker 2: that women should be underneath the mail. They are not 27 00:01:22,959 --> 00:01:26,600 Speaker 2: to be respected or have a voice or opinions really, 28 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:29,680 Speaker 2: and so there was always fights because my mom was 29 00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:34,160 Speaker 2: a very strong thirded woman. Yeah, and this just led 30 00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:36,280 Speaker 2: to a lot of Like I said, I just saw 31 00:01:36,319 --> 00:01:39,160 Speaker 2: a lot of violence and experienced it myself, grown up 32 00:01:39,160 --> 00:01:42,240 Speaker 2: with my father and then at seven him going to 33 00:01:42,319 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 2: prison and finding out what had happened later on, it 34 00:01:48,040 --> 00:01:51,520 Speaker 2: really affected. It kind of snowballed and affected my life 35 00:01:51,560 --> 00:01:52,880 Speaker 2: and the relationships there. 36 00:01:52,680 --> 00:01:55,560 Speaker 1: On the way you described the it's a lot of 37 00:01:55,600 --> 00:01:58,680 Speaker 1: day Saints that the church that sounds like it has 38 00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:03,640 Speaker 1: a lot of parallels to fundamentalism Islam and and and 39 00:02:03,880 --> 00:02:07,720 Speaker 1: Sharia law. Is that a safe or comparable thing a parallel? 40 00:02:09,480 --> 00:02:12,280 Speaker 2: Well, I think anything that you take to an extreme, 41 00:02:12,760 --> 00:02:15,040 Speaker 2: you know, I guess you could compare them. But yeah, 42 00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:17,360 Speaker 2: I mean it was there was no color. It was 43 00:02:17,400 --> 00:02:21,600 Speaker 2: black or white, there was just nothing really in between. Yeah, 44 00:02:21,919 --> 00:02:23,040 Speaker 2: that was my experience. 45 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:28,280 Speaker 1: Yeah, so you said he ended up in prison. Let 46 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:31,240 Speaker 1: my listeners know how exactly he ended up in prison 47 00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:36,040 Speaker 1: and not just regular prison to life sentences them all right, correct. 48 00:02:37,280 --> 00:02:42,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, he took the life of my aunt and her baby, 49 00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:50,800 Speaker 2: my baby cousins the filling you know, uh prophecy, oh stre. 50 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:57,600 Speaker 1: He killed them related to his faith in some twisted perception, specifically, 51 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:01,360 Speaker 1: what's the connection between the real religious fundamentalism in their death? 52 00:03:03,919 --> 00:03:08,160 Speaker 2: They were well, he was excommunicated from the Eldience Church, 53 00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 2: and then him and his brothers started creating their own 54 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:15,680 Speaker 2: church or you know, doing their own thing where it 55 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:17,360 Speaker 2: was called the School of Prophets, and so they are 56 00:03:17,360 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 2: all profits. And in that school the oldest pad of 57 00:03:22,400 --> 00:03:26,680 Speaker 2: revelation that that this aunt of mine needed to be removed, 58 00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:28,880 Speaker 2: and that my father was a prophet of he was 59 00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:31,840 Speaker 2: the hand of God, and so therefore that was his role. 60 00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:36,200 Speaker 2: And in their twistedness made sense to that. 61 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:38,280 Speaker 1: Bit of a red flag for an adult in this world. 62 00:03:38,360 --> 00:03:40,800 Speaker 1: But as a child of I mean you had you 63 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 1: couldn't speak out against it. And I suppose, given how 64 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:47,800 Speaker 1: young you were, you had no basic comparison, no world experience, 65 00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:50,760 Speaker 1: being hidden from the rest of the world in your home, 66 00:03:50,800 --> 00:03:53,280 Speaker 1: and how would you know, I guess you were either 67 00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: forced to believe him or you actually believe what he 68 00:03:55,280 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 1: was saying. Rebecca, Am I right on that. 69 00:03:59,160 --> 00:04:01,960 Speaker 2: Well, there's a part part of me that always you know, 70 00:04:02,080 --> 00:04:04,800 Speaker 2: obviously my father. I look up to him, I trust him, 71 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:09,080 Speaker 2: I adored my father, and that was also a part 72 00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:11,320 Speaker 2: of me that was fearful of him, and I didn't 73 00:04:11,320 --> 00:04:16,120 Speaker 2: trust everything he said, the. 74 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:19,360 Speaker 1: Typical child reaction. I suppose at least that part was typical. 75 00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:22,200 Speaker 1: You know, my children didn't always listen to what I 76 00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 1: had to say. So this is a completely autobiographical book. 77 00:04:27,560 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 1: What prompted you to write this? Because you talk about 78 00:04:30,520 --> 00:04:33,080 Speaker 1: your struggles and the emotions and everything you went through, 79 00:04:33,080 --> 00:04:35,279 Speaker 1: and then also you talk about when he reached out 80 00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:37,159 Speaker 1: to you from prison, which I want to ask you about. 81 00:04:37,160 --> 00:04:40,279 Speaker 1: But what was the compelling reason for writing The Lafferty Girl. 82 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:45,559 Speaker 2: Well, I had somebody that I really admire and trust 83 00:04:45,640 --> 00:04:49,280 Speaker 2: to recommended that I write my story. And when she talks, 84 00:04:49,320 --> 00:04:52,839 Speaker 2: I listen, and so I felt, you know, once I 85 00:04:52,839 --> 00:04:55,280 Speaker 2: get enough of my inner healing work and I was 86 00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:57,880 Speaker 2: able to get to a place where I could speak 87 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,000 Speaker 2: from Pope and not just the pain, I knew it 88 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:06,480 Speaker 2: was time to tell my story. Yeah, him reaching out 89 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:09,919 Speaker 2: to me from prison. It was it was healing. That 90 00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:12,479 Speaker 2: was part of the healing process. He took accountability for 91 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:14,760 Speaker 2: some of the things that he how he was was 92 00:05:14,800 --> 00:05:19,440 Speaker 2: a father with me. He's never acknowledged that what he's 93 00:05:19,480 --> 00:05:22,280 Speaker 2: done is wrong. He still holds very very strongly too, 94 00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:24,719 Speaker 2: that he is a prophet and that he is here 95 00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:26,360 Speaker 2: to fulfill a goal. 96 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:29,800 Speaker 1: Now, did you when you how old were you when 97 00:05:29,839 --> 00:05:31,600 Speaker 1: he when he reached out to you from prison, because 98 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:34,200 Speaker 1: you know that's on the cover materials too, obviously that 99 00:05:34,279 --> 00:05:36,880 Speaker 1: was a very profound moment in your life. But how 100 00:05:36,880 --> 00:05:37,920 Speaker 1: old were you at that time? 101 00:05:39,760 --> 00:05:44,039 Speaker 2: Yes, So I stayed in communication with him for a while. 102 00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:46,320 Speaker 2: We had written, We would write back and forth, but 103 00:05:46,360 --> 00:05:48,360 Speaker 2: then there was a period where I had not heard 104 00:05:48,400 --> 00:05:51,000 Speaker 2: from him, and then the book Under the Banner of 105 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:53,960 Speaker 2: Heaven had come out, and so there was a really 106 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:57,599 Speaker 2: long gap. And I would have been thirty five maybe 107 00:05:57,839 --> 00:05:59,160 Speaker 2: when we reconnected. 108 00:06:00,400 --> 00:06:03,040 Speaker 1: So when he's still clinging to this idea that he's 109 00:06:03,080 --> 00:06:05,920 Speaker 1: a prophet at age thirty five and now capable as 110 00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:08,960 Speaker 1: an adult reflecting back on your childhood understanding what abuse 111 00:06:09,120 --> 00:06:12,479 Speaker 1: is and is not, did you call him out on 112 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,640 Speaker 1: it by any change? You said you know, are you 113 00:06:14,680 --> 00:06:17,679 Speaker 1: serious about this prophet stuff? I mean that I'm Brian Thomas. 114 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 1: That's the kind of the thing, the in conversation I 115 00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:21,680 Speaker 1: would engage in if it was my dad calling me 116 00:06:21,720 --> 00:06:23,800 Speaker 1: from prison. You know, I wouldn't pull any punches. I'm 117 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,760 Speaker 1: just kind of wondering, giving the delicacy of the situation, 118 00:06:25,880 --> 00:06:28,400 Speaker 1: if if you engaged in a process back and forth 119 00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:32,280 Speaker 1: about that concept, you. 120 00:06:32,279 --> 00:06:36,320 Speaker 2: Know, I think, I just know I still carried some 121 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:39,240 Speaker 2: fare around that. I you would always talk about it. 122 00:06:39,279 --> 00:06:41,400 Speaker 2: I just didn't want to hear it coming from his lips. 123 00:06:41,440 --> 00:06:43,760 Speaker 2: That would just I don't know, it was just another 124 00:06:44,560 --> 00:06:47,040 Speaker 2: level of reality. I just does not want to go 125 00:06:47,120 --> 00:06:48,320 Speaker 2: with you know too, with him. 126 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:49,960 Speaker 1: See those are words I can hear coming out of 127 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:51,640 Speaker 1: my mouth if I was having this conversation my dad, 128 00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:55,160 Speaker 1: I don't want to hear this crap dad, that that's anyway? 129 00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:58,479 Speaker 1: So who did you write that? I mean, obviously it's 130 00:06:58,560 --> 00:07:00,600 Speaker 1: cathartic to write a book about this. Get it out 131 00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:03,880 Speaker 1: of your system, and many people recommend therapists and psychologists 132 00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:06,520 Speaker 1: that you write a journal. Get it out of your system, 133 00:07:06,560 --> 00:07:09,200 Speaker 1: put it on paper. It helps you understand your situation 134 00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:11,240 Speaker 1: and come to grips with your own reality, but you 135 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:13,840 Speaker 1: obviously had an audience you're writing this too. Is this 136 00:07:13,920 --> 00:07:16,360 Speaker 1: for other people who struggle with abuse and are still 137 00:07:16,360 --> 00:07:19,520 Speaker 1: dealing with the scars as adults? Is it for women 138 00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:23,160 Speaker 1: in abusive relationships? Or I mean it sounds to me 139 00:07:23,240 --> 00:07:25,640 Speaker 1: like there's a whole schmorgasboard of potential audience here. I'm 140 00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 1: just wondering what who you had in mind when you 141 00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 1: wrote it, other than yourself. 142 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:33,760 Speaker 2: Yeah, I really just well for all of that compassion 143 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:38,920 Speaker 2: for the little girl, you know, compassion and love for 144 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:42,040 Speaker 2: my family and the healing that I could bring, and 145 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:46,720 Speaker 2: then for anyone that's carrying the silence of shame and 146 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,679 Speaker 2: you know, just wanting to not feel alone. I wrote 147 00:07:49,680 --> 00:07:51,760 Speaker 2: this because I want people to know they are not alone. 148 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:56,800 Speaker 1: It's a good message, it really, it truly is. And 149 00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:00,480 Speaker 1: you alluded to under the banner of heavy in your 150 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:05,160 Speaker 1: comments earlier, that's an FX Hulu series And is that 151 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:07,720 Speaker 1: still out there that someone did a documentary about your 152 00:08:07,760 --> 00:08:09,440 Speaker 1: father and the crimes he perpetrated. 153 00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:14,680 Speaker 2: Correct, John Kracker was. He wrote a book under the 154 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:17,320 Speaker 2: arch cousin, He interviewed with my father as he wrote it, 155 00:08:17,400 --> 00:08:21,400 Speaker 2: and then Hulu did a series on it. 156 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:24,680 Speaker 1: Did they interview you for that? I just don't wonder 157 00:08:24,680 --> 00:08:28,000 Speaker 1: what your reaction is. I can't. I'm just struggling with 158 00:08:28,400 --> 00:08:30,000 Speaker 1: what my emotions might be if someone's going to do 159 00:08:30,040 --> 00:08:32,080 Speaker 1: a series about my father, How did you take that? 160 00:08:33,240 --> 00:08:35,960 Speaker 2: They never asked, they didn't interview anybody from the family. 161 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:37,679 Speaker 2: In fact, a lot of it is there's a lot 162 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:42,680 Speaker 2: of fictitious stuff that they've all went into that. Oh, 163 00:08:42,800 --> 00:08:43,959 Speaker 2: and that's how they got around that. 164 00:08:45,120 --> 00:08:47,280 Speaker 1: Well, another reason to write the book to set the 165 00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:51,440 Speaker 1: record straight about what you, Rebecca Lafferty, dealt with with 166 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:53,640 Speaker 1: him being your father. Well again the name of the 167 00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:56,160 Speaker 1: book of the Lafferty Girl Surviving Trauma Abuse in My 168 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,640 Speaker 1: Father's Crimes, a Mormon Daughter's Story. We made it really 169 00:08:59,679 --> 00:09:01,440 Speaker 1: easier for my listeners to get a copy of Rebecca 170 00:09:01,520 --> 00:09:03,360 Speaker 1: Joe Strecker. My producers put it on a blog page 171 00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,200 Speaker 1: fifty five caresy dot com at the link to the 172 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:07,480 Speaker 1: site where they can buy it, which all encourage them 173 00:09:07,520 --> 00:09:09,640 Speaker 1: to do. And for those out there maybe dealing with 174 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,160 Speaker 1: similar circumstances or struggles, or maybe you got a friend 175 00:09:12,240 --> 00:09:15,160 Speaker 1: or relative that's in this, get a copy of it 176 00:09:15,200 --> 00:09:17,439 Speaker 1: and help maybe help them heal as well. Rebecca. I 177 00:09:17,440 --> 00:09:19,160 Speaker 1: can't thank you enough for spending this time with my 178 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:21,160 Speaker 1: listeners and me this morning, and for putting this all 179 00:09:21,200 --> 00:09:21,680 Speaker 1: on paper.