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Speaker 1: They got a lot offense this year to back up

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Speaker 1: that pitching. It could be a fun year in this division.

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Speaker 2: The start of the season cannot go worse than it

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Speaker 2: did last year unless they make us wait for Connor Griff. Like,

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Speaker 2: if they make us really wait, I'm gonna be inconsolably.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I.

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Speaker 3: Can handle April, and I'll be mad about it, right,

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Speaker 3: but like if no way, dude, if he's not up

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Speaker 3: before June, pitchforks.

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Speaker 1: People will be furious.

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Speaker 3: There's no reason for him to not start the season,

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Speaker 3: and if things don't go well, then send him down.

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Speaker 3: He's got the mental fortitude to be able to handle it.

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Speaker 3: And apparently he's a strapping young buck, very hot. Every

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Speaker 3: description from every baseball writer.

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Speaker 2: Is like horny for him, Connor Griffin's triceps.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you what I mean. I would leave my wife.

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Speaker 4: Buster only what Brandy Bellman and the DVE Morning.

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Speaker 1: Showed whistle with us on the show yesterday.

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Speaker 3: Abby, Today's show is not as jam packed with guests.

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Speaker 1: For a very good reason.

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Speaker 3: Well the Machine Bert Krascher will be joining us a

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Speaker 3: little bit later on this morning. Bert is in town

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Speaker 3: for his tour, which hits PPG Paints Arena tonight. I

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Speaker 3: believe this is called the Permission to Party Tour, and

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Speaker 3: there are still some tickets available, which is surprising.

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Speaker 5: That is crazy to me, Surps.

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Speaker 3: But he'll be live in studio around eight o'clock. Sean

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Speaker 3: Collier will also join us and Mike Pursuda.

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Speaker 1: We'll have your sports.

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Speaker 3: The NCAA tournament kicking off in full force yesterday and

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Speaker 3: as always, surprises on day one, real fun day of basketball,

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Speaker 3: just watching basketball.

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Speaker 1: I watched two games.

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Speaker 5: I was gonna ask if you post it up anywhere?

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Speaker 3: No, Well, I went to bar to have dinner and

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Speaker 3: watched the VCU North Carolina game where VCU came back

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Speaker 3: and upset North Carolina last night. It was delightful. It's

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Speaker 3: everything that March Madness is supposed to be about.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, your bets get banged up at all?

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Speaker 3: No, I was, I split, I was, I was fifty

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Speaker 3: to fifty. Wasn't bad than good? It was a wash there.

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Speaker 3: You got hands up in the air, all right. Michael

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Speaker 3: had more on that, and Abby's got a news update

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Speaker 3: for you. Now, what's going on?

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Speaker 1: Abby? How are you? How's everything? Oh great?

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Speaker 4: Randy?

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Speaker 5: How are you?

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Speaker 6: Game?

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Speaker 4: Oh?

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Speaker 6: Wo?

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Speaker 7: News?

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Speaker 6: This hours brought to you by your neighborhood Ford Store.

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Speaker 6: Cloudy and breezy today and a chance for a storm

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Speaker 6: this afternoon. It's going to be high at sixty one.

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Speaker 6: Then Saturday, a mix of clouds and sun for a

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Speaker 6: high of sixty. That's kind of the day to circle

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Speaker 6: for the weekend. Sunday, mostly cloudy and warmer, another chance

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Speaker 6: for storm in the afternoon, and that'll be a high

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Speaker 6: of seventy six. Kiss Winter goodbye. Today is the first

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Speaker 6: day of spring. Here are five reasons why that's great

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Speaker 6: news for your health.

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Speaker 5: And your well being. Number one, there's better lights.

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Speaker 6: There's you know, of course, the fact that we changed

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Speaker 6: the clocks earlier this month so it's brighter later now.

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Speaker 6: Is that starting to impact your mood yet? Have you

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Speaker 6: noticed that all?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Because I think having the ability to go out and

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Speaker 3: run an errand at six thirty and it doesn't feel

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Speaker 3: like you're going out in the middle of the night

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Speaker 3: really does help.

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Speaker 5: I agree with that. I don't feel like the day

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Speaker 5: is done.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you can get more stuff done because you

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Speaker 3: know how it is when when it gets dark early,

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Speaker 3: you just don't want to leave the house.

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Speaker 6: After six Yeah, I got to go for like.

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Speaker 5: A later walk last night.

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Speaker 1: That sounds delightful.

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Speaker 6: Felt it felt delightful one because it wasn't as cold,

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Speaker 6: but also I didn't feel like it was pitch black.

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Speaker 6: By the time I was doing that and the kids

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Speaker 6: were outside playing, it was just nice. It was starting

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Speaker 6: to feel a little bit better. Good Number two is

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Speaker 6: you might actually sleep better. Being exposed to more sunlight

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Speaker 6: during the day can help you sleep better at night. Well,

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Speaker 6: I take a lot of drugs to go to sleep

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Speaker 6: at night now, but they're all actually they're all homeopathics,

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Speaker 6: so I guess.

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Speaker 5: I couldn't call them drugs.

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Speaker 1: You got them from a homie.

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Speaker 6: I did elthianine or sianing. I'm not totally sure. Of course,

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Speaker 6: there's the four hundred milligrams of magnesium we gotta take that.

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Speaker 6: I take those together, love that however it gets done.

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Speaker 6: Mine's like in ale.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: And then also I snorted, And then the camamal tea

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Speaker 6: is always a nice touch on top if I really

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Speaker 6: want to take it down. But being exposed again to

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Speaker 6: more sunlight during the day can obvious sleep better at nights,

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Speaker 6: and then you get.

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Speaker 5: A little more alert during the day. Should that work

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Speaker 5: for you now?

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Speaker 6: I'm not saying I'm staying asleep, Randy, but I'm falling asleep.

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Speaker 1: That's my big problem. I keep waking up in the

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Speaker 1: middle of the night.

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Speaker 5: I am as well.

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Speaker 6: I don't know if that's just a nervous system, especially

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Speaker 6: with this job, saying hey, did you screw up? Because

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Speaker 6: I'll wake up thinking that, oh im overslappt you. Well. No,

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Speaker 6: I must be waking up moments before my alarm because

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Speaker 6: my body knows it's time.

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Speaker 5: But then I'll look at the clock and I'll be

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Speaker 5: like one.

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Speaker 3: The last two nights before last night, I woke up

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Speaker 3: at three point thirty nice, which sucks. And last night

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Speaker 3: I woke up at one and I was like, okay,

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Speaker 3: I am not up for the night at one.

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Speaker 1: That's not happening.

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Speaker 3: So I ate a bowl of cereal, which I always

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Speaker 3: find to be an important. I love that first start. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: to get packed to sleep, and I think it took

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Speaker 3: about a half an hour, so it wasn't too bad

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Speaker 3: at all. It wasn't too bad.

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Speaker 5: You don't feel great after that?

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Speaker 1: I felt terrible.

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Speaker 3: It's still disrupted at a little slow this morning that

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Speaker 3: I'll pick it up.

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Speaker 5: No, I still I love.

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Speaker 6: The eating though I do love that you're I love

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Speaker 6: that you still commit to eating.

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Speaker 1: You're like, you know what, fine, I guarantee you.

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Speaker 3: It's like the I do the two things that are

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Speaker 3: least recommended to try to get back to sleep, which

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Speaker 3: are one eating.

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Speaker 1: Two.

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Speaker 3: I will turn the TV on and then put a

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Speaker 3: pillow over my head so I don't see any like

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Speaker 3: so I'm in the dark, but I just need to

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Speaker 3: say the ambient sound. I can't be alone with my

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Speaker 3: thoughts at one o'clock in the morning because I will

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Speaker 3: just stress myself out thinking about you got to do that, this,

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Speaker 3: that and the other thing, and no, well what if

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Speaker 3: that happens, Well, then you're gonna have to you know,

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Speaker 3: just that anxiety brain that has plagued me my entire life.

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Speaker 5: I love that the TV goes on, but a pillow

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Speaker 5: has to go o.

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Speaker 7: You know, it's.

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Speaker 3: Just right, like there's a pillow. No, it has to

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Speaker 3: be the TV. Well, because I get sucked into a show,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, and then that that is

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Speaker 3: how I will fall asleep if I'm not concentrating on

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Speaker 3: my own brain and I'm listening to what they're saying

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Speaker 3: on West Wing or Larry Sanders show or something.

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Speaker 5: What kind of shows do you pick?

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Speaker 6: Oh well, I just gave you two examples, but it's

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Speaker 6: a repeat.

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Speaker 3: Usually I do shows I already know because I don't

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Speaker 3: want to have the intrigue of what happens next. I

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Speaker 3: want to know what happens next so that I don't

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Speaker 3: have to if I want to stay awake because I

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Speaker 3: want to know what happens.

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Speaker 1: That's worse.

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Speaker 6: But you like repeat stuff, love repeats that would engage

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Speaker 6: your brain, I would think, but.

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Speaker 1: Because I know what's going to happen. Okay.

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Speaker 6: I used to go with David Attenborough's Planet Earth.

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Speaker 1: Oh that would be way too compelling for me.

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Speaker 5: Oh really.

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Speaker 6: It used to soothe me because it would be like

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Speaker 6: Hell the African and then I would just be like

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Speaker 6: just kind of crash out. It was that or I

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Speaker 6: told you in my twenties, I would put on Sea Span.

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Speaker 3: I would like to just hear Charles Barklay and Dick

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Speaker 3: Fitel talking, if I could get that as white noise,

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Speaker 3: just the two of those guys talking.

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Speaker 1: To each other, all right.

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Speaker 5: Another sign that you can be happy that it's spraying.

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Speaker 5: There are more fresh, healthy food options.

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Speaker 6: Spring is the season of fresh produce making it the

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Speaker 6: perfect time to add more fruits and veggies to your diet,

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Speaker 6: which I'm excited for because I've been doing a lot

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Speaker 6: of carbs and a lot of soups.

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Speaker 3: I'm always a big fruit person. Yeah, lots of fruits

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Speaker 3: during the day. Are blueberries in the morning. Get a

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Speaker 3: little pineapple action at some point, and an apple and

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Speaker 3: or an orange.

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Speaker 1: I try to do that every day.

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Speaker 5: That's really good.

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Speaker 3: That seems like too much fruit. Maybe that's my problem.

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Speaker 3: I might be eating too much fruit.

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Speaker 5: That's why you're waking up.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, or I'm not eating fruit when I do wake up.

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Speaker 5: I feel like that sugar blast would not be good.

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Speaker 3: Well, how's the sugar blast from a bull of cauche?

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Speaker 3: Probably not very good, right, Probably not great. Outdoor activities

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Speaker 3: are a thing.

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Speaker 6: Gardening, pickleball, walking, any activity that gets you outside and

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Speaker 6: moving is good for your health. It can affect everything

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Speaker 6: from your weight and mood to lower your risk of

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Speaker 6: cardiovascular disease.

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Speaker 1: We talked about pickleball.

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Speaker 3: I think the important thing with pickleball after you hit

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Speaker 3: the age of forty is that you are okay with

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Speaker 3: losing and letting some balls.

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Speaker 7: Go like that.

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Speaker 3: That's a point for you yeah, because it's when you

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Speaker 3: try too hard that stop start you blow out your knee.

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Speaker 3: My friend just blew out her ACL MCL playing pickleball.

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Speaker 1: That's she's our weak.

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Speaker 3: Three of recovery of like six weeks and then six

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Speaker 3: months of rehab.

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Speaker 5: I'd make up a different story.

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Speaker 1: I get it at some point if you have to

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Speaker 1: stay active.

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Speaker 3: And that means getting injured, and that means PET. But

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Speaker 3: I just did a year of PET, and I need

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Speaker 3: a couple of years before I go to my next PET.

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Speaker 3: I mean it's usually every other year you're you get

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Speaker 3: a PET, and I just want to wait a little while.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's all.

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Speaker 5: I'd never tell somebody I got hurt during pickleball.

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Speaker 1: Me neither.

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Speaker 5: I was at a bar and I almost killed again.

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Speaker 1: Yeah that I saved somebody. A school bus was going

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Speaker 1: to hit a kid.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, peat Lee, and be like I almost saved somebody's life.

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Speaker 6: I got arrested, but I almost saved someone.

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Speaker 3: Like all right, yeah, I'm not sure how these stories,

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Speaker 3: but I'll listen.

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Speaker 1: Sure, but that is.

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Speaker 3: What happened to Peatlee. He was saving somebody and got arrested.

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Speaker 3: You can do both.

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Speaker 6: Finally, spring cleaning may improve your health uttering and organizing

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Speaker 6: your space can help reduce stress, boost productivity, and create

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Speaker 6: a more positive environment for you to just exist in.

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Speaker 3: If Marie Konda walked into my house, she would have

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Speaker 3: a nervous breakdown and need to have an ambulance.

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Speaker 6: She would say, this does not bring me joy, and

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Speaker 6: I'm going to remove myself from it.

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Speaker 3: The only thing she would spark is a joint to

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Speaker 3: try and calm down from the lack of joy that

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Speaker 3: she receives from. How much crap. My basement just got overloaded.

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Speaker 3: That's the problem I need to start. There's I have

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Speaker 3: too much gear now too Oh, I need a room

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Speaker 3: for gear.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm gonna get bars.

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Speaker 3: And keyboards and all that crap. Yeah, I gotta get

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Speaker 3: rid of some stuff. I don't know why I'm hanging

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Speaker 3: onto it.

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Speaker 6: I realize I don't need four amps because every time

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Speaker 6: I do want to start something musical, Yeah, I buy

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Speaker 6: a new thing. Sure to cater to what I want

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Speaker 6: to do well, And it's also fun and it helps.

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Speaker 1: It gives you a little motivation.

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Speaker 3: Sure, I did the exact same thing, and now I

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Speaker 3: have an organ that I've played once. Yeah, it's awesome

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Speaker 3: and I can't wait to be in a situation where

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Speaker 3: I'm gonna need to use it on the regular. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: I'm just far away from that. And I'm not sure

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Speaker 3: why I needed to jumpstart that to now, but I did.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, I'm totally gonna do it again.

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Speaker 6: Uh. Yeah, that's what musicians do, and I'm gonna do everything.

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Speaker 3: The guy from Sweetwater, which is for those who aren't musicians,

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Speaker 3: it's like the costco of or more like Amazon of

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Speaker 3: music equipment, but their salespeople are so aggressive. And the

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Speaker 3: guy left me this message yesterday and it is like drugs, Like, Hey,

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Speaker 3: just wondering if you're thinking about any new projects this

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Speaker 3: year and if you have them right gear, I'll got

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Speaker 3: some ideas you might not have thought about.

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Speaker 1: Give me a call. Wow, I shut up, Alex.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well I'm not calling you back because it's a

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Speaker 3: thousand dollars minimum.

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Speaker 1: When I do got enough cabling?

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Speaker 5: Oh dude, Oh, I haven't thought about that.

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Speaker 3: You know the worst things to show up at a

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Speaker 3: gig and you're cable shorts out. Why don't I send

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Speaker 3: you the twelve pack of gold tips. Yeah, that'll be

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Speaker 3: four hundred and fifty dollars, but they're guaranteed for life.

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Speaker 3: They are sweet, but then you lose them to some

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Speaker 3: jag off who say, a sound guy somewhere who just

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Speaker 3: wraps it up with all.

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Speaker 1: Of his cables.

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Speaker 7: Yep.

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Speaker 3: Anyways, these are you know, ham and egg musician problems.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about something else.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, all right, let's move on to something local you

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Speaker 6: can celebrate Today, the Children's Museum of Pittsburgh's gonna offer

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Speaker 6: free admission for all visitors ten am to five pm,

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Speaker 6: which not only celebrates the museum being named the number

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Speaker 6: one children's museum in the country by the twenty twenty

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Speaker 6: six USA Today ten Best Readers Choice Awards, it is

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Speaker 6: also coinciding with the birthday of Fred Rogers, which is today,

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Speaker 6: and that also, I will tell you, is perfect timing

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Speaker 6: because apparently mister Rogers Neighborhood is finally getting a home

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Speaker 6: of its own on YouTube. So they're going to have

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Speaker 6: a dedicated YouTube channel where you can watch all the episodes.

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Speaker 6: Oh that's great to Rogers Neighborhood, which I have won.

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Speaker 6: Wondered why there wasn't just a channel. No, I know,

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Speaker 6: it's PBS, but only for mister Rogers.

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Speaker 1: I'm saying, that's why there hasn't been one.

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Speaker 6: Oh yeah, I guess so, but I wanted that in

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Speaker 6: the same way that a while back, I was doing

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Speaker 6: a night with my daughter where we had canvases and

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Speaker 6: we had just acrylic paints ready to go, and we

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Speaker 6: each pulled up a reference picture and we were gonna.

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Speaker 5: Paint all night.

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Speaker 3: You are the funnest mom. We never did any stuff

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Speaker 3: like this, but I.

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Speaker 5: Had said to her, do you know who Bob Ross is?

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Speaker 6: And she said no, And I said, let's see if

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Speaker 6: we can find something on TV. And sure enough, I

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Speaker 6: searched Bob Ross and I think it was to be

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Speaker 6: or something like that, and they just had NonStop Bob

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Speaker 6: Ross and you could just watch it. And she I

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Speaker 6: did not think that she was going to be transfixed

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Speaker 6: by it, but she absolutely was, and it changed even

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Speaker 6: what she wanted to make.

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Speaker 1: That's so cool.

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Speaker 5: So it went from her.

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Speaker 6: Being like, I'm going to paint maybe something that was

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Speaker 6: like animals and stuff, to all of a sudden she

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Speaker 6: wanted to make a cherry blossom. She wanted to make

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Speaker 6: something that was a little more landscaping. But she was

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Speaker 6: stopping and watching him in a way that I was thinking,

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Speaker 6: I should just have this on in the house all

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Speaker 6: the time. Yeah, because I was also stopping at moments

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Speaker 6: when she would get frustrated and I would say, well,

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Speaker 6: did you hear what he was just saying where he

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Speaker 6: kind of screwed up a little bit, but how he

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Speaker 6: rolled it into something that's kind of you know, I

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Speaker 6: just screwed up and I made it into something. So

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Speaker 6: that's kind of the whole point. As he was saying,

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Speaker 6: anybody can paint, you know, that.

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Speaker 3: Just sounds like a delightful mommy daughter moment. And by

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Speaker 3: the way, I'd like to go back on what I

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Speaker 3: said about having Charles Barkley and dig By cow Be

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Speaker 3: the dulcet tones that lull me to sleep and resubmit

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Speaker 3: Bob Ross. Yeah, you can put some Bob Ross on

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Speaker 3: and that would put your right down.

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Speaker 6: Now, what I didn't get to her with her was

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Speaker 6: the documentary and be like, now, there was also a

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Speaker 6: crazy lady who was trying to have an affair with him.

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Speaker 1: And there is some weird sexual intrigue.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, and tried to steal all of his money and

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Speaker 6: I think he died poor because of it.

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Speaker 7: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I never did watch that documentary. Now, I know that

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Speaker 3: people were up in arms about how it was depicted

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Speaker 3: because they felt like too much emphasis was placed on

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Speaker 3: this one scandalous thing that he really it wasn't his doing.

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Speaker 1: He was more the victim of.

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Speaker 3: He absolutely was, and that made it a sordid look

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Speaker 3: back at his life and career instead of what his

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Speaker 3: family wanted, which was a more celebrated look.

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Speaker 6: He deserves that, and I think they should do an

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Speaker 6: additional look at his life because of that. His approach

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Speaker 6: to life, for sure, that should be the focus. But

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Speaker 6: this was more like if you were doing a documentary

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Speaker 6: on Selena's manager versus Selena Gotcha, because this woman.

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Speaker 1: Was really more about hern than Bob Rosso.

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Speaker 6: It really got it the weeds because this woman was

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Speaker 6: obsessed with him and basically put herself in the middle

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Speaker 6: of his empire with products, with you know, photo ops,

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Speaker 6: with all of his meet and greet opportunities, to the

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Speaker 6: point where she's in almost every photo. Even if you

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Speaker 6: buy a Bob Ross product to this day, like paper

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Speaker 6: or canvas.

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Speaker 5: She's in the photo.

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Speaker 6: Wow, And it almost looks like you would assume, if

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Speaker 6: you didn't know better, either that she's a very accomplished

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Speaker 6: painter or that she's his wife.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and she's not. She's neither She's just a crazy lady,

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Speaker 1: very strange. Yeah, it made it.

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Speaker 5: It's it's wild. I have to look up.

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Speaker 6: I'll look up for everybody with the name of the

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Speaker 6: documentary is all right, you want to do one more?

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Speaker 1: You want to wrap that route because I want to

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Speaker 1: do crazy.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I got something special for everyone here coming home.

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Speaker 5: Well, I love that.

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Speaker 7: All right.

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Speaker 6: Cloudy and breezy today. Chance for a storm this afternoon

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Speaker 6: and it's the highest sixty one.

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Speaker 3: Bert Christ known as the The first time he ever

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Speaker 3: told the Machine story was on the DV Morning Show

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Speaker 3: with me and Jimmy Crin back in I want.

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Speaker 1: To say two thousand and six something like that, and

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Speaker 1: I was like, you have never told the story before.

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Speaker 1: He's like no, I'm like on stage, No, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: your nuts. This story is hilarious.

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Speaker 3: Then he went and did the Rogan Podcast and told

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Speaker 3: it on the Rogan Podcast and the rest is history.

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Speaker 3: I have the original recording of Bert doing the machine

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Speaker 3: on the DV Morning Show coming up for Bridge from

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Speaker 3: March Madness, well, the real day one, as far as

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Speaker 3: I'm concerned. Mike pursued it with Your Sports Now on

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Speaker 3: DV Mike.

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Speaker 7: The sixteen games on one day thing is different than

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Speaker 7: Tuesday Night.

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Speaker 1: Not a fan, not a fan.

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Speaker 7: Sports that hour brought to you by Pridginal Pleats. Welcome

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Speaker 7: back in CUAA tournament in Arnest, then in arenas and

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Speaker 7: gyms all across this great land of ours. Uh Duke

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00:17:54,640 --> 00:17:59,640
Speaker 7: almost lost to Sienna. North Carolina did lose to Virginia

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00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:04,280
Speaker 7: Common in overtime mean spectacular fashion. But the highlight of

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Speaker 7: the first sixteen game onslaught in the NCAA Basketball Tournament

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Speaker 7: the Cinderella of Cinderella's twelve seed high Point beating five

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Speaker 7: seed Wisconsin eighty three to eighty two. High Point from

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Speaker 7: the Big South Conference, playing Gardner Webb in the like

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Speaker 7: Winthrop Wisconsin from the Big Ten, and high Point head

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Speaker 7: coach Flynn Claiman had a statement to make after high

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Speaker 7: Point had made a statement your.

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Speaker 8: First nc double a tournament game, coach Clayman, and.

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Speaker 9: Looks pretty obviously that high magency to play mid majors

418
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Speaker 9: are in the seas.

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Speaker 1: Because they said we haven't played nobody. We played somebody, Now,

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Speaker 1: how'd you do it? Fails unreal. I know I'm good

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Speaker 1: to a team we had, but nobody would play.

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Speaker 6: Us just like they would have played Miami Oi.

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Speaker 1: But they got a playoffs in this tournament.

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Speaker 8: Coach you by ten early on.

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Speaker 1: Okay, this team just mobbed them.

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Speaker 7: Yes, what a moment.

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Speaker 1: It's great.

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Speaker 3: The only thing for me is it's diluted a little

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Speaker 3: bit by the fact that high Point is not a

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Speaker 3: real school.

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Speaker 1: Do you know what high Point is?

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Speaker 7: No idea, the school word of it. They've been in

433
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Speaker 7: this before, they just never won before.

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00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:30,680
Speaker 3: They conduct campus tours on golf carts. They offer their

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Speaker 3: wealthy students private housing for forty thousand dollars a year,

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Speaker 3: and the school motto emphasizes life skills. Job interviews and

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Speaker 3: client deals often happen over meals. Administrators want students to

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Speaker 3: rehearse social etiquette.

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Speaker 1: This is part of your education. There.

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Speaker 3: They built a steakhouse, a Mediterranean restaurant, and an Asian

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Speaker 3: grill where students eat as part of their meal plan

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00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:59,159
Speaker 3: to learn how to navigate the menus efficiently so that

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Speaker 3: they seem more or.

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Speaker 1: You know, worldly.

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00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:09,760
Speaker 3: On campus is also an airplane cabin interior, because sitting

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Speaker 3: next to an executive on a plane offers golden opportunities,

447
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:16,960
Speaker 3: and it's one they want their students to rehearse for.

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Speaker 3: So they go and sit and they'll be an executive

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Speaker 3: sitting there, and they sit down for twenty five minutes

450
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:25,320
Speaker 3: or thirty minutes next to an executive, and they rehearse

451
00:20:25,720 --> 00:20:30,720
Speaker 3: talking with executives on airplanes. The campus concierge offers students

452
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 3: airports shuttle service for free if they wear a High

453
00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:37,760
Speaker 3: Point shirt. Otherwise it costs ninety five dollars. What they're

454
00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:40,960
Speaker 3: trying to achieve there is brand awareness. They want to

455
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:45,000
Speaker 3: make sure that everybody is representing the university at all times.

456
00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:47,359
Speaker 3: It's a rich kids school to teach them how to

457
00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:51,879
Speaker 3: be rich without teaching them anything else.

458
00:20:52,640 --> 00:20:56,200
Speaker 7: Hey, are they getting more or less out of that

459
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:59,400
Speaker 7: than I got out of freshman econ one oh one

460
00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:02,800
Speaker 7: or baseball coaching or some of the other.

461
00:21:03,080 --> 00:21:04,600
Speaker 1: That's fine. I understand you.

462
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:07,000
Speaker 7: I under your argument.

463
00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,040
Speaker 3: But the option is there for you to have a

464
00:21:09,080 --> 00:21:12,680
Speaker 3: normal education should you choose to do so. At High

465
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:15,800
Speaker 3: Point it's where rich kids go so they don't embarrass

466
00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:16,400
Speaker 3: their parents.

467
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,879
Speaker 7: Well, hey, maybe there's something to be sent for teaching that,

468
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,520
Speaker 7: because there's a lot of embarrassing people. If you can

469
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:27,360
Speaker 7: afford the forty grand a year for a dorm cost

470
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:28,679
Speaker 7: the air service, that's right.

471
00:21:28,760 --> 00:21:30,840
Speaker 3: I could have. I could have used that they drive

472
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:33,639
Speaker 3: you around on a golf cart, Mike on campus, Oh

473
00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:34,679
Speaker 3: do you need to go to class?

474
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 7: See, we could have done that, but it would have

475
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:37,080
Speaker 7: got stuck in the Sunow.

476
00:21:38,680 --> 00:21:41,479
Speaker 3: We couldn't even do it at Dve after college without

477
00:21:42,560 --> 00:21:45,639
Speaker 3: completely turfing a green at Grandview.

478
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,480
Speaker 7: And having a golf course. Tell us never to come back.

479
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:49,720
Speaker 1: Well, the old two niner and his buddies have a

480
00:21:49,720 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 1: few beers. That was really on us.

481
00:21:53,359 --> 00:21:53,960
Speaker 7: What a game?

482
00:21:54,480 --> 00:21:56,640
Speaker 1: And now that was a great That was a great game.

483
00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:58,520
Speaker 7: Not in the way I wanted it to end, but

484
00:21:58,560 --> 00:22:00,840
Speaker 7: I still appreciated it, because what a game?

485
00:22:01,160 --> 00:22:05,359
Speaker 1: What do you what are you saying? Jacob? I picked

486
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:09,879
Speaker 1: that one? Did you high point? They were like thirty

487
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:11,600
Speaker 1: and four of the regular season, and.

488
00:22:11,520 --> 00:22:15,679
Speaker 7: That that kid, I thought it was hyperbole. That was

489
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,080
Speaker 7: they I've not seen anything like. At least Golky did

490
00:22:19,119 --> 00:22:22,679
Speaker 7: it the traditional way. He would catch the ball and

491
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,119
Speaker 7: make a head fake or line it up for some

492
00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:27,679
Speaker 7: or even just catch and shoot. There was a rhythm

493
00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 7: to it. This kid, Johnston, he treated the ball like

494
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:31,240
Speaker 7: it had aides.

495
00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:34,280
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, well in the US late in the game,

496
00:22:34,560 --> 00:22:36,879
Speaker 3: he had a break away, He had a layup and

497
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:39,680
Speaker 3: it was his first two pointer of the season and

498
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:40,200
Speaker 3: it won.

499
00:22:40,080 --> 00:22:41,240
Speaker 1: The game, and it won the game.

500
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:44,520
Speaker 7: Yeah, he was The process looked like he was trying

501
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:48,520
Speaker 7: to possess the ball for the few seconds possible before

502
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:51,040
Speaker 7: shooting it. Yeah, just like it was almost like he

503
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:53,159
Speaker 7: was just deflecting it. Yeah, and he's making it.

504
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,679
Speaker 1: He made it from the logo for it defied logic.

505
00:22:56,760 --> 00:23:00,440
Speaker 3: The funny thing is that big cat, a Wisconsin grat, Yeah,

506
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:04,080
Speaker 3: brought that kid up last week and said, Hey, we

507
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:05,800
Speaker 3: might get goalkied by a kid like this.

508
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:06,600
Speaker 1: Check this out.

509
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:10,960
Speaker 3: And he previewed that kid and everything happened, and they said,

510
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:12,480
Speaker 3: wouldn't it be funny if they beat us with a

511
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:13,000
Speaker 3: two pointer?

512
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:17,800
Speaker 7: And he did And there's your twelve five. Yeah, you

513
00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:18,480
Speaker 7: can sit you watch.

514
00:23:18,760 --> 00:23:21,120
Speaker 3: That's why I don't think twelve fives are the real

515
00:23:21,200 --> 00:23:25,000
Speaker 3: upsets anymore, thirteen fours or the first layer of upset

516
00:23:25,040 --> 00:23:26,040
Speaker 3: as far as I'm concerned.

517
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:31,639
Speaker 7: Well, I know Wisconsin had beaten Michigan at Michigan, Illinois

518
00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:35,960
Speaker 7: at Illinois, Purdue at Purdue, and Michigan stayed at home

519
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,679
Speaker 7: in the Big Ten season and pretty good and couldn't

520
00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 7: beat High Point.

521
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:40,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just crazy.

522
00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:45,840
Speaker 3: Fus comeback against North Carolina should get somebody fired at

523
00:23:45,880 --> 00:23:47,080
Speaker 3: North Carolina.

524
00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,560
Speaker 7: Maybe, although the top end of the A ten is

525
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:55,119
Speaker 7: always legit. I's talking about what that being legit?

526
00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:58,359
Speaker 1: It's about a nineteen point lead in the second half.

527
00:23:58,440 --> 00:24:00,159
Speaker 7: Yeah, I still should be able to get that one. Well,

528
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:03,439
Speaker 7: the North Carolina without its star point guard who's injured,

529
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,240
Speaker 7: is not is not all that.

530
00:24:07,359 --> 00:24:10,200
Speaker 3: Run something else than whatever they were doing, and they were.

531
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 1: I mean, it's it's just not that they went cold.

532
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:13,200
Speaker 4: Now.

533
00:24:13,400 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 3: VCU, to their credit, went on like a nineteen to

534
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:16,960
Speaker 3: two run at one point.

535
00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: It was that was a fun game to watch.

536
00:24:19,000 --> 00:24:23,679
Speaker 7: Duke yesterday became the first one seed to trail A

537
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:27,440
Speaker 7: sixteen by double digits. At halftime, Duke was down eleven.

538
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: Dude didn't rest anybody on his team from Sianna.

539
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:31,000
Speaker 7: Ended up winning by six.

540
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,960
Speaker 1: Did he eventually sub anybody in?

541
00:24:34,200 --> 00:24:34,400
Speaker 7: Think?

542
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 1: Yes, No he didn't. Jacob says, I think very late.

543
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:38,919
Speaker 7: I'll look it up.

544
00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:43,120
Speaker 1: I mean, his only chance or stupid.

545
00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,480
Speaker 3: It's like, should you have gone in for a pit

546
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:46,920
Speaker 3: stop earlier type thing?

547
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:50,880
Speaker 7: You know? You know I'd say it's I think, let's

548
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:54,879
Speaker 7: the old McNamara. Jerry mcnamarray, the old Syracuse Guard. He

549
00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:58,159
Speaker 7: probably knows his team better than I do. It's amazing

550
00:24:58,359 --> 00:25:00,439
Speaker 7: when you put a guy in who can't play, how

551
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:03,360
Speaker 7: the game finds him. And even when he's in there

552
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:07,040
Speaker 7: for twenty seconds, bad stuff happens. So you know he

553
00:25:07,359 --> 00:25:13,200
Speaker 7: took to the wire. Sixteen more games on tap today

554
00:25:13,359 --> 00:25:16,239
Speaker 7: and tonight. Man, that was fun. Yesterday left here and

555
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:18,800
Speaker 7: I had a little business to attend to, and then

556
00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:21,879
Speaker 7: I met some guys at the bar and watched some

557
00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:25,120
Speaker 7: hoops and punch stuff into my phone and.

558
00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:29,639
Speaker 3: Want to hear the high Point University radio call of

559
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 3: the game.

560
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:30,800
Speaker 7: I would love to.

561
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:36,400
Speaker 1: This is from high Points Student Radio.

562
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 7: So they teach them how to turn the radio on.

563
00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:41,600
Speaker 1: I think they teach them how to buy the radio station.

564
00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:49,280
Speaker 1: It sertain to shoot.

565
00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:01,000
Speaker 10: Dab laymen.

566
00:26:13,359 --> 00:26:17,160
Speaker 1: The kids are sting at each other. Nine seconds.

567
00:26:17,200 --> 00:26:21,120
Speaker 10: Boy, watch it in time time six seconds.

568
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:25,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, boy.

569
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:32,919
Speaker 1: They launched down pot on the glass slipper. It dusted

570
00:26:33,080 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 1: the story twill the first time the program, mister way,

571
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:42,120
Speaker 1: what what rights through?

572
00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:46,120
Speaker 3: We will see you in the round of thirty two,

573
00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 3: I mean, unbelievable.

574
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:52,000
Speaker 1: Abby'll have you new is coming up top of the hour?

575
00:26:52,320 --> 00:26:55,800
Speaker 6: What kind of jag steals from the Duke Hane incline

576
00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:58,720
Speaker 6: and can you imagine surgery while you're awake?

577
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,520
Speaker 5: It's a new trend. Cosmetic patients are choosing.

578
00:27:01,280 --> 00:27:05,800
Speaker 3: Bert Kreischer The Machine live and studio, probably late next hour,

579
00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:09,399
Speaker 3: but before that. The first time Bert ever told the

580
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:13,000
Speaker 3: Machine story anywhere was here on the DV Morning Show,

581
00:27:13,280 --> 00:27:14,800
Speaker 3: and I've got a clip of it coming up.

582
00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:17,879
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583
00:27:18,000 --> 00:27:21,200
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584
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585
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586
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Speaker 5: E March Hits Different.

587
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588
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Speaker 5: With aging parents. You want to keep an eye on their.

614
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Speaker 3: All You Ads ND Morning Show Randy Baman Law with

615
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Speaker 3: Dabbie Prisoner this morning. This praiser has been a friend

616
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,560
Speaker 3: of the show for a long time. And as I mentioned,

617
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:06,360
Speaker 3: the first time he told the machine story, it was

618
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:10,280
Speaker 3: here on the dB Morning Show. It became world famous

619
00:29:10,320 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 3: when he told it on Rogan and it exploded.

620
00:29:12,720 --> 00:29:15,080
Speaker 1: But there was a time Bert, you can look this

621
00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:15,800
Speaker 1: up on YouTube.

622
00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 3: One of our first comedy festivals, because Burt's been on

623
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:21,440
Speaker 3: a couple he told the machine story and the video

624
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:25,160
Speaker 3: of that went viral and has like eleven million views.

625
00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 5: Oh my god.

626
00:29:26,040 --> 00:29:28,920
Speaker 3: At the Bay in Theater. So this is from and

627
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:31,160
Speaker 3: I don't know what year this is. I apologize. I

628
00:29:31,200 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 3: know it was me and Jimmy on the show, and

629
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 3: I think it was two thousand and six, two thousand

630
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:38,280
Speaker 3: and seven something like that. And this was the first time,

631
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:42,720
Speaker 3: and it's edited, so it's chopped up a little bit here,

632
00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:48,400
Speaker 3: so excuse the choppiness at certain points. The machine as

633
00:29:48,400 --> 00:29:51,360
Speaker 3: it was told for the first time on the DV

634
00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:52,160
Speaker 3: Morning Show.

635
00:29:52,240 --> 00:29:54,120
Speaker 9: You're at the Florida State right now, at to Florida State.

636
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:57,120
Speaker 9: Why did you take Russian in Florida State because I

637
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:02,520
Speaker 9: thought it was Spanish. I was like, a noon Spanish

638
00:30:02,560 --> 00:30:04,560
Speaker 9: class would be awesome, right, And so I was like,

639
00:30:04,600 --> 00:30:06,720
Speaker 9: I can't believe they got a noon Spanish class. So

640
00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:10,400
Speaker 9: I signed up for it was Russian.

641
00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,240
Speaker 1: I sit down and the teacher's hot.

642
00:30:12,080 --> 00:30:16,480
Speaker 9: And I'm like, this is great, neude, hot teacher, fourteen

643
00:30:16,560 --> 00:30:19,440
Speaker 9: kids in the class, I'm gonna kill it, right yeah,

644
00:30:19,440 --> 00:30:21,240
Speaker 9: And then she starts writing a new alphabet and I go,

645
00:30:21,360 --> 00:30:24,320
Speaker 9: when did Spanish get a new alphabet? And then I

646
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:26,800
Speaker 9: go I raised my hand. I go, this is this Spanish?

647
00:30:26,840 --> 00:30:28,960
Speaker 9: And she goes, you know this is Russian? And I

648
00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:30,920
Speaker 9: want to I'm out. And then all the kids in

649
00:30:30,920 --> 00:30:32,920
Speaker 9: the class go, wait, if you leave the class, we

650
00:30:32,960 --> 00:30:35,400
Speaker 9: can't have Russian because we need fifteen for a class.

651
00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:37,880
Speaker 9: And so I go, yeah, but I'm not taking Russian

652
00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:40,400
Speaker 9: and they're like why not. I was like, when, well,

653
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:42,400
Speaker 9: will I ever need Russian if I need a kidney?

654
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 9: And I got to go over there and find one,

655
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:45,880
Speaker 9: Like I don't, I'm never gonna take use Russians. So

656
00:30:45,880 --> 00:30:47,360
Speaker 9: I'm not gonna take Russian because I don't want to

657
00:30:47,400 --> 00:30:49,480
Speaker 9: learn it. So then the teacher said to me, just

658
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:52,240
Speaker 9: hang out and sit to the entire class. This is horrible.

659
00:30:52,280 --> 00:30:54,080
Speaker 9: This is this is Florida State one on one right here.

660
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:55,960
Speaker 9: So I get downe the class and she goes, look,

661
00:30:55,960 --> 00:30:58,000
Speaker 9: here's the deal. There's fourteen kids that want to take

662
00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:00,000
Speaker 9: the class. If you sit in here, I get to teach.

663
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,400
Speaker 9: I get to achieve my master and I can teach

664
00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:05,160
Speaker 9: these kids and they can all learn Russian. So if

665
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:09,200
Speaker 9: you just show up, I'll give you a c wow.

666
00:31:09,240 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 9: And I was like, you just sold me. Goddamn guess

667
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 9: who's majoring in Russian?

668
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:13,840
Speaker 1: Right?

669
00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:15,960
Speaker 9: So then I did Russian one, and then Russian two

670
00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:17,880
Speaker 9: shows around. All these kids want to learn Russian too.

671
00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:20,200
Speaker 9: So I was like, he is, that's plan still working,

672
00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:22,120
Speaker 9: and she goes yeah. So I showed up for Russian too,

673
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:24,000
Speaker 9: Russian three. Finally they called them, They're like, hey, you

674
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:25,040
Speaker 9: want to go to Russia. I was like, I can't

675
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:28,920
Speaker 9: speak Russian. I never learned any of the language. And

676
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:30,760
Speaker 9: listen to a bunch of people mumble with marbles in

677
00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:33,280
Speaker 9: their life. And then finally she goes, She goes, yeah,

678
00:31:33,280 --> 00:31:34,920
Speaker 9: if you go to Russian, you get a major in Russian.

679
00:31:35,080 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 1: Russian.

680
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:36,920
Speaker 9: So I had to sit down with the head of

681
00:31:36,960 --> 00:31:38,960
Speaker 9: the Russian apartment and he goes, look, I understand the

682
00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 9: deal you guys worked out. So if I said you

683
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 9: to Russian, you gotta have a major in Russian. But

684
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,960
Speaker 9: you can't come back and take like old church Slavonic.

685
00:31:44,480 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 9: You can't like want to pursue this. You have to

686
00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:49,200
Speaker 9: go over there and just don't. You can't really be

687
00:31:49,280 --> 00:31:52,640
Speaker 9: a doctor. Yeah, so I went over there. Yeah, you

688
00:31:52,640 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 9: don't show up at the UNN.

689
00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:56,800
Speaker 1: You get translated, right. So I was like great.

690
00:31:56,800 --> 00:31:59,080
Speaker 9: So I went to Russia for like three months and

691
00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 9: then got involved with the mob.

692
00:32:01,280 --> 00:32:05,400
Speaker 1: Way, I swear to you. So we got to hear

693
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:06,400
Speaker 1: this us.

694
00:32:06,560 --> 00:32:10,800
Speaker 9: Okay, So when we go over there, they tell us

695
00:32:10,800 --> 00:32:14,400
Speaker 9: they go the So the mob runs everything. This is

696
00:32:14,440 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 9: nineteen ninety three or ninety five, all right, the mob

697
00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:19,200
Speaker 9: runs anything. So everything. So we got two gangsters for you,

698
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:23,320
Speaker 9: Igor and Sasha. Now they they go listen, they're gonna

699
00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:24,960
Speaker 9: follow us around. They're gonna live on the same floor

700
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,800
Speaker 9: we do. They're just there to make sure we've paid

701
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:28,840
Speaker 9: the mob. We've paid the Mob already. They've given us

702
00:32:28,840 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 9: these two guys to make sure we don't get padded down,

703
00:32:31,040 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 9: like we don't get like shaken down. Right, So these

704
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,080
Speaker 9: guys all follows, don't make eye contact with them, don't

705
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:36,840
Speaker 9: talk to them, don't do anything. So then of course

706
00:32:36,880 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 9: first thing I do is like, I'm gonna meet these guys.

707
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:40,000
Speaker 9: I'm gonna meet gangsters. I want to be the I

708
00:32:40,080 --> 00:32:42,959
Speaker 9: want to be the Frankie Valley of Russia, you know.

709
00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:43,960
Speaker 1: Like, so I go.

710
00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:46,400
Speaker 9: Over knock on their door, and I knock on their

711
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:47,960
Speaker 9: door and they and they answer the door. They're having

712
00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:49,600
Speaker 9: like a party with like real Russians in their room,

713
00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:52,200
Speaker 9: and it's Igor and he's a wife beater and he's

714
00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 9: like just and he's like got his cigarette.

715
00:32:54,200 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 1: He's like shu oh, which is what?

716
00:32:56,200 --> 00:32:58,680
Speaker 9: And then I panicked, and so I meant to say,

717
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:00,680
Speaker 9: which I learned in my Russian book, my name's Bert,

718
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:02,920
Speaker 9: Nice to meet you. But what I said was I

719
00:33:02,960 --> 00:33:09,160
Speaker 9: am a machine. And then and then he falls apart, laughing,

720
00:33:09,680 --> 00:33:11,240
Speaker 9: and he goes and he just says it brings me

721
00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:12,920
Speaker 9: in the room, and he starts playing in English. He goes,

722
00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 9: say it again, say it again. And then I said

723
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:16,320
Speaker 9: to everyone, I go, I am a machine. And then

724
00:33:18,360 --> 00:33:20,000
Speaker 9: so then they fell in love with me, and I

725
00:33:20,040 --> 00:33:23,040
Speaker 9: started like we started hanging out every day and then

726
00:33:23,080 --> 00:33:25,880
Speaker 9: I started learning Russian through Igor and Sasha. Like they

727
00:33:26,000 --> 00:33:28,000
Speaker 9: teach me Russian and I teach them English, and then

728
00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:30,960
Speaker 9: I teach them English slangs in Russian, like how to

729
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:32,880
Speaker 9: say like uh, you know, I can't say it on air,

730
00:33:32,920 --> 00:33:35,360
Speaker 9: but like dirty slang, right, ok So then okay, so

731
00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:36,000
Speaker 9: now do we have.

732
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:37,720
Speaker 3: A second Yeah, wow, you know what, here's what I'm

733
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,960
Speaker 3: gonna do. I'm gonna do a quick commercial break. Okay,

734
00:33:39,960 --> 00:33:42,000
Speaker 3: we're gonna come back from that and get Dicey's picks

735
00:33:42,080 --> 00:33:47,760
Speaker 3: my dad's retired booky and then Bert's get fish. We

736
00:33:47,880 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 3: ended up robbing a train and oh, okay, I thought

737
00:33:50,440 --> 00:33:51,600
Speaker 3: it ended with a hit or something.

738
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:54,600
Speaker 1: Ended up robbing a train. It's pretty bad. It's pretty bad,

739
00:33:55,520 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 1: all right.

740
00:33:56,040 --> 00:33:59,120
Speaker 9: So so Egor and Sasha and I become really tight friends.

741
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:01,200
Speaker 9: Me and this other guy, John Bolshoi, which means big

742
00:34:01,240 --> 00:34:03,200
Speaker 9: John in Russian. He was just a big Italian guy

743
00:34:03,200 --> 00:34:05,280
Speaker 9: from New York, from the Bronx, and he was he

744
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:07,560
Speaker 9: was He looked like a thug, but he was the

745
00:34:07,640 --> 00:34:10,799
Speaker 9: sweetest guy. But he could really speak Russian. So a

746
00:34:10,800 --> 00:34:13,439
Speaker 9: different mob runs Moscow, A different mob runs the train.

747
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:15,680
Speaker 9: So what we're going to Moscow? So Egoro Sasa tell

748
00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 9: me listen, we've set you up with the mob in Moscow,

749
00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:21,080
Speaker 9: and we set you up with the mob on the train.

750
00:34:21,239 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 9: The two guys are gonna shadow you just like we do.

751
00:34:23,239 --> 00:34:24,759
Speaker 9: They're gonna party with You're gonna have a good time

752
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:26,680
Speaker 9: with these guys. We're friends with them. And I was like, okay, cool.

753
00:34:26,880 --> 00:34:28,960
Speaker 9: So they drop us off the train and we meet

754
00:34:28,960 --> 00:34:32,640
Speaker 9: the two new gangsters, Igorn Igor and Igorn Igor look

755
00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:35,359
Speaker 9: like they're really in the mob, like Igoosasa kinda did,

756
00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 9: but they could also look like they maybe worked at

757
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 9: a deli.

758
00:34:37,840 --> 00:34:39,399
Speaker 1: These guys look like they're in the mob.

759
00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:43,719
Speaker 9: Hardcore like track suits, purple track suits. And so we

760
00:34:43,760 --> 00:34:45,799
Speaker 9: saw up in there and Igor is like, this is

761
00:34:45,880 --> 00:34:50,240
Speaker 9: the machine. If you, if you, if you give him vodka,

762
00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:52,080
Speaker 9: the machines a good time, Like you're gonna have a

763
00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:54,080
Speaker 9: good time with the machine, and they're like machine, They're like.

764
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 9: And so my class is all putting their bags in

765
00:34:56,080 --> 00:34:58,919
Speaker 9: coach and the gangsters go. The machine doesn't ride and coach.

766
00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:01,640
Speaker 9: The machine rides in first class, and I'm like, shut up,

767
00:35:01,640 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 9: I got my own sleeper cart, right, but it's these

768
00:35:03,680 --> 00:35:05,480
Speaker 9: two guys are in it. I'm sharing it with these guys.

769
00:35:05,480 --> 00:35:07,160
Speaker 9: So I bring John ball Sshoy up, I go, let's

770
00:35:07,160 --> 00:35:09,000
Speaker 9: party with these guys. I mean the train hasn't even

771
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:11,520
Speaker 9: taken off yet, right. The conductor comes in, rips off

772
00:35:11,520 --> 00:35:13,279
Speaker 9: the patch on his sleeve, gives it to he goes,

773
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 9: I want to give a present to the machine. I

774
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:18,359
Speaker 9: will like there's some respect because it's because yeah, because

775
00:35:18,400 --> 00:35:20,360
Speaker 9: the mom's now told everyone the machine's gonna be on

776
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:22,440
Speaker 9: this train. So we do a shot with a conductor

777
00:35:22,440 --> 00:35:24,239
Speaker 9: before he takes off, before the game drives the train.

778
00:35:24,320 --> 00:35:25,040
Speaker 7: We take your shot.

779
00:35:25,320 --> 00:35:26,880
Speaker 1: I'm like, do you want to text somebody while we're

780
00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:27,200
Speaker 1: doing this?

781
00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:32,320
Speaker 10: So so for a hitmand or so within a machine

782
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:35,040
Speaker 10: within within twenty minutes, all the vodka a our first

783
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:37,600
Speaker 10: class cart's gone, right, I mean we've drank everything.

784
00:35:37,640 --> 00:35:40,360
Speaker 9: And these guys are crazy, like you can see the

785
00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:42,359
Speaker 9: craziness in their eyes, like happen and they go so

786
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,040
Speaker 9: they so we're like an hour in, they go, let's

787
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,280
Speaker 9: go to the bar cart and get more, get more vodka.

788
00:35:46,360 --> 00:35:49,239
Speaker 9: I go, done me John bolshoy igornygor going to the

789
00:35:49,239 --> 00:35:51,800
Speaker 9: bar cart. And now these guys don't speak any English

790
00:35:51,840 --> 00:35:54,080
Speaker 9: at all, like they speak little broken English. You go

791
00:35:54,160 --> 00:35:56,200
Speaker 9: and Sasha can translate, so they get we get another

792
00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,240
Speaker 9: thing is me, John Bolshoy Andornygor and they go machine

793
00:35:59,320 --> 00:36:01,360
Speaker 9: go behind the bar and get vodka. They say in Russian,

794
00:36:01,440 --> 00:36:04,240
Speaker 9: but I understand them, and I'm like, they said get vodka.

795
00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:06,200
Speaker 1: I look at John and John's like, you're getting it, buddy.

796
00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:09,960
Speaker 3: Like I'm like, like you're learning, you're drinking anyway, and understanding.

797
00:36:10,160 --> 00:36:12,839
Speaker 9: They go get some bread clip and I go, I

798
00:36:12,880 --> 00:36:14,719
Speaker 9: got it, and they're like, get some seated that's cheese

799
00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 9: and I'm like, they say, get bread and cheese and

800
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:18,560
Speaker 9: then like grab all the roubles and I was like what.

801
00:36:18,880 --> 00:36:20,680
Speaker 9: And then grab all the money and I was like

802
00:36:20,880 --> 00:36:22,160
Speaker 9: And then I look around and everyone in the bar

803
00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:24,000
Speaker 9: cart's standing against the wall and they're like just patting

804
00:36:24,040 --> 00:36:26,319
Speaker 9: everyone down, taking stuff out of their pockets. And I'm like,

805
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:29,279
Speaker 9: oh my god, we're robbing the trail. And I look

806
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,640
Speaker 9: at John and John's like, do not argue, just get

807
00:36:31,640 --> 00:36:33,279
Speaker 9: the money. And now the guy behind the bar is

808
00:36:33,320 --> 00:36:34,879
Speaker 9: like he's stiff, like he's seen the ghost and he's

809
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:36,719
Speaker 9: not making eye contact with me because he doesn't want

810
00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:38,279
Speaker 9: to see what I look like because he might have

811
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:39,240
Speaker 9: to kill him, right, yeah.

812
00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:41,120
Speaker 1: So I'm like, oh my god. In my head, I'm like,

813
00:36:41,120 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 1: stop saying my name. So we robbed the cart.

814
00:36:44,640 --> 00:36:46,239
Speaker 9: We robbed the cart, and then we go back and

815
00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:48,160
Speaker 9: we go back, and now the mood has changed, right,

816
00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 9: there's no much more fun in this room. The first

817
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:53,240
Speaker 9: glass card is scary, like we'rening good fellas.

818
00:36:53,280 --> 00:36:54,880
Speaker 1: We just killed the guy.

819
00:36:55,000 --> 00:36:57,240
Speaker 9: So we're sitting in there and we're just drinking, staring

820
00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,680
Speaker 9: at each other, and the sun starts setting, and Biggiere

821
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 9: says to me, when we're gonna have some a lot

822
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 9: of fun when the sun goes down, I go why,

823
00:37:03,600 --> 00:37:05,839
Speaker 9: and he hands up. He's got all the keys. He goes,

824
00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:07,680
Speaker 9: I got all the keys to the train. When the train,

825
00:37:07,719 --> 00:37:10,440
Speaker 9: when everyone falls asleep, we're gonna rob everyone. And I'm like,

826
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:13,640
Speaker 9: oh my gosh. I'm like Butch cassidying the Sundays kid

827
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:16,520
Speaker 9: here in Russia. And I look at John John Bolshoy

828
00:37:16,560 --> 00:37:18,600
Speaker 9: and he goes, my buddy, and he goes, He goes,

829
00:37:18,640 --> 00:37:19,840
Speaker 9: I don't think we're gonna have an option.

830
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:21,320
Speaker 1: I think we have to rob the train with these guys.

831
00:37:21,719 --> 00:37:24,120
Speaker 9: So sun goes down and these and what I decide

832
00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:25,560
Speaker 9: to do because I know all my whole classes on

833
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:27,200
Speaker 9: the train. I decide to get these guys so drunk

834
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:30,160
Speaker 9: that we can't rob trains. That's a good, great idea.

835
00:37:30,280 --> 00:37:33,680
Speaker 9: So I start drinking hardcore. Now I'm getting spins. I'm

836
00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:35,640
Speaker 9: getting really hammered. And so we go to rob the

837
00:37:35,640 --> 00:37:38,000
Speaker 9: first car, which is my class, and we rob my class.

838
00:37:38,000 --> 00:37:41,279
Speaker 9: We rob them black, We go through this is what

839
00:37:41,360 --> 00:37:43,480
Speaker 9: this is what we do. Okay, the door opens and

840
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:45,840
Speaker 9: they slide in and they crawl and they start pulling

841
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:48,480
Speaker 9: backpacks out and slide them out out the thing, and

842
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,439
Speaker 9: then we go through the backpacks and then we sign

843
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:52,000
Speaker 9: them back and they push it in. And now if

844
00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:55,080
Speaker 9: someone wakes up, Biggiegorn throws over the door, takes Valkun,

845
00:37:55,120 --> 00:37:55,879
Speaker 9: spits it in their eyes.

846
00:37:55,920 --> 00:37:58,760
Speaker 1: That's this is a real thought out player. These guys,

847
00:37:59,040 --> 00:37:59,400
Speaker 1: no one er.

848
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:01,680
Speaker 9: They're in the mob Russia and not doing something real

849
00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:04,000
Speaker 9: in their locks. So we robbed my whole class. And

850
00:38:04,000 --> 00:38:05,480
Speaker 9: then finally these guys are like, all right, we're going

851
00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:06,520
Speaker 9: to the rest of the cart, and John and I

852
00:38:06,520 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 9: are like, oh, we're gonna hang out of here. So

853
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:09,920
Speaker 9: we go back and we start like trying to get

854
00:38:09,960 --> 00:38:11,879
Speaker 9: like we're like panicking, what are we gonna do they

855
00:38:11,880 --> 00:38:13,359
Speaker 9: come back. They brought the whole cart. We go back

856
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:15,239
Speaker 9: into the room and we're just we're like, oh my god.

857
00:38:15,320 --> 00:38:18,360
Speaker 9: My teacher shows up. Valerie shows up and opens the

858
00:38:18,400 --> 00:38:20,719
Speaker 9: door to my first class car and goes, I need

859
00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:22,880
Speaker 9: to speak to Burt right now. Igors pits VODK in

860
00:38:22,880 --> 00:38:24,480
Speaker 9: her face, goes, No, one talks to machine like that.

861
00:38:25,160 --> 00:38:27,200
Speaker 1: Like she does. She talks to machine like that.

862
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 9: She goes, No, what's She goes, you've you've robbed the train?

863
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,239
Speaker 9: You have you are hanging out a gang? Sirs, you

864
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:35,240
Speaker 9: just spit vogking my face. And we called the police.

865
00:38:35,239 --> 00:38:37,279
Speaker 9: They'll be waiting for us and arrive in Moscow. And

866
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:39,840
Speaker 9: I'm like the police and like, don't worry about it.

867
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:41,200
Speaker 9: And I'm like, I'm worried because I don't want to

868
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:41,840
Speaker 9: go to the gulag.

869
00:38:42,040 --> 00:38:42,759
Speaker 1: I spend time.

870
00:38:42,880 --> 00:38:45,760
Speaker 9: And if you get tattoos made out of tire rubber

871
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:47,840
Speaker 9: and now, and like I don't want that.

872
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:49,680
Speaker 1: I don't want to be a clever or whatever I

873
00:38:49,760 --> 00:38:52,920
Speaker 1: want to call these people. That's how they make their tattoos.

874
00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:54,640
Speaker 1: You got yeah, did you win the gangs?

875
00:38:54,680 --> 00:38:56,839
Speaker 9: And they get you tire rubber tattoos and they've all

876
00:38:56,840 --> 00:38:59,360
Speaker 9: got them, and they're not good looking. They're not like

877
00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:01,200
Speaker 9: fought out said, want of a goat, and I don't

878
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:05,520
Speaker 9: want to goat tattoo. So so then so sunrises and

879
00:39:05,560 --> 00:39:07,520
Speaker 9: we have not stopped drinking, and Egor and Egor are

880
00:39:07,560 --> 00:39:08,520
Speaker 9: just smoking and drinking.

881
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,320
Speaker 1: Were hammered.

882
00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:11,200
Speaker 9: I pull up and I look and on the shirt

883
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:12,840
Speaker 9: enough on the train cart, my whole classes and their

884
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:17,279
Speaker 9: jammers just crying. Everyone's crying, and their bags are all disheveled,

885
00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:18,839
Speaker 9: and they're giving a report.

886
00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:19,120
Speaker 10: To the police.

887
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:25,360
Speaker 6: Like to.

888
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:31,840
Speaker 1: Turn a puppet going down, right.

889
00:39:31,840 --> 00:39:33,640
Speaker 9: So Ego and Egor like, don't worry about it, we'll

890
00:39:33,680 --> 00:39:35,080
Speaker 9: take care of her. Worry about it, and I go,

891
00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:36,960
Speaker 9: I'm really worried because I'm this is how al must

892
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,479
Speaker 9: spend the rest of my life in Russian prison without

893
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 9: speaking Russian.

894
00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:42,520
Speaker 1: This is what I'm going to be the punching bag.

895
00:39:42,800 --> 00:39:44,839
Speaker 9: So then the police get done the report, and then

896
00:39:44,840 --> 00:39:47,080
Speaker 9: they look over and Egor and Egor stop sucking their

897
00:39:47,120 --> 00:39:49,160
Speaker 9: hand bottle of vaka, and they look at the police

898
00:39:49,320 --> 00:39:51,479
Speaker 9: and the and the police point to them and wave

899
00:39:51,560 --> 00:39:52,319
Speaker 9: them over and they.

900
00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:53,719
Speaker 1: Start yelling at them in Russia like.

901
00:39:55,719 --> 00:39:56,080
Speaker 7: I just said.

902
00:39:56,120 --> 00:40:01,640
Speaker 9: Next sounds and they started yearing at the cops are

903
00:40:01,680 --> 00:40:02,319
Speaker 9: going at each other.

904
00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,040
Speaker 1: I'm going, this is is this how they meant to

905
00:40:04,040 --> 00:40:05,440
Speaker 1: take care of it? They were just gonna be rate.

906
00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 9: The two cops like I should have taken care of

907
00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:09,400
Speaker 9: it and just pleaded dumb and then find me in

908
00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 9: the middle of the yelling.

909
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:14,360
Speaker 1: One cop points at me and goes, I'm like, play doom.

910
00:40:15,800 --> 00:40:16,399
Speaker 1: I don't know what he saw.

911
00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:19,000
Speaker 9: I'm making up boards, right, So I so I like,

912
00:40:19,000 --> 00:40:20,520
Speaker 9: look at John and I walk over to the two

913
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 9: cops and now I'm like, this is it. This is

914
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:24,240
Speaker 9: my moment of reckoning. This is me going to jail.

915
00:40:24,320 --> 00:40:26,239
Speaker 9: And the cop looks at me real stern and he goes,

916
00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:30,320
Speaker 9: so you are the machine and I said yeah, And

917
00:40:30,360 --> 00:40:32,040
Speaker 9: he goes to night you party with me, and I

918
00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:33,239
Speaker 9: was like, oh, go.

919
00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:36,040
Speaker 1: Swear to you.

920
00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:39,400
Speaker 9: I went out with two cops that night and Igor

921
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:41,720
Speaker 9: and Igor and two other gangsters to a strip club

922
00:40:41,840 --> 00:40:43,480
Speaker 9: and then we get hammered and one of the cops

923
00:40:43,480 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 9: throws me the keys.

924
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:47,000
Speaker 1: He goes on, don't you drive this CD cos it's Russia.

925
00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:48,280
Speaker 1: It's like the Wild West.

926
00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:51,200
Speaker 9: So me and John are driving a car, whew, pulling

927
00:40:51,280 --> 00:40:51,839
Speaker 9: people over.

928
00:40:51,960 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 1: Let's bout him down. It was. It was the craziest

929
00:40:54,680 --> 00:40:55,400
Speaker 1: time of my life.

930
00:40:57,040 --> 00:40:59,560
Speaker 7: Hi Michelle, Michelle, he can get a thong on for me.

931
00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:03,040
Speaker 1: That's ever a problem. In the DVE Electric Lunch where

932
00:41:03,080 --> 00:41:04,320
Speaker 1: the listeners.

933
00:41:03,880 --> 00:41:04,600
Speaker 7: Pick the song.

934
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:06,920
Speaker 1: This chowlemen bunch break listening to you.

935
00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:10,240
Speaker 4: Take a lunchtime break from the ordinary on the Electric

936
00:41:10,360 --> 00:41:12,719
Speaker 4: Lunch with Michelle on DVE.

937
00:41:13,960 --> 00:41:16,440
Speaker 11: Hey there, it's carried joy with your work money minute

938
00:41:17,280 --> 00:41:18,799
Speaker 11: when gold and silver prices are hot,