Speaker 1: All right, it is the Mojo in the morning show.
Speaker 1: The phone number is eight four four Mojo Live eight
Speaker 1: four four six sixty five six five four eight. Kev's
Speaker 1: told us in our pre show meeting that Josiah was
Speaker 1: a little bit. I don't know. I say bad because
Speaker 1: Josiah can never be bad. Josiah's bad is not bad,
Speaker 1: is it? No?
Speaker 2: No, he's not He's not bad. That's not the word
Speaker 2: I would use. I was, he say, But I had
Speaker 2: a little attitude problem.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 2: Josiah's off for school for two weeks for spring break,
Speaker 2: and I basically allowed Joe to kind of do whatever
Speaker 2: he want to do, like it's like a free vacation,
Speaker 2: no real rules, kind of go to sleep kind of whenever,
Speaker 2: as long as he go to be about three, like
Speaker 2: I'm straight. But with this freedom, Josiah does not like
Speaker 2: when you try to take away that freedom or limit
Speaker 2: that freedom. And I feel like he has a hard
Speaker 2: time understanding how blessed he is to stay up as
Speaker 2: long as he wants to, to be able to go
Speaker 2: in refrigerator and get whatever he wants to, to watch TV,
Speaker 2: to go to sleep at three am, to play these
Speaker 2: games that he forgets. How amazing. That is for five
Speaker 2: or six days straight. So when the seventh day comes
Speaker 2: and you tell him no, we about to do something else,
Speaker 2: he doesn't respond in the way that I think he
Speaker 2: should respond. And ever since Josiah was born, his mom
Speaker 2: and I have allowed him to vocalize his opinion.
Speaker 1: We never wanted to silence him.
Speaker 2: We never wanted them to feel like just because he's
Speaker 2: a child, he doesn't have a voice. And when he
Speaker 2: asks questions, we don't just say because I said so,
Speaker 2: Like we like to provide a reason, although sometimes you
Speaker 2: don't need to know the reason.
Speaker 1: You know it is because I say so. But that's
Speaker 1: neither here nor there.
Speaker 2: So it comes to a point where I'm telling Joe
Speaker 2: Saia like, this is what we're going to do. Shut
Speaker 2: down everything else, and he starts to talk back. He
Speaker 2: start to pop off with his mouth, and a piece
Speaker 2: of me is like, Nah, don't hit Josiah. I've never
Speaker 2: been well, I don't like beating kids and all of that.
Speaker 1: You feel me. I donet been through guys.
Speaker 2: I'd have had my ass with several I just don't feel
Speaker 2: like that's the best way to approach these type of situations.
Speaker 2: But it'd be the moments where it's like, dog, I
Speaker 2: need to like I want to beat your ass like copus,
Speaker 2: you know what I'm saying, but like I don't. So
Speaker 2: my thing was we was about to watch it movie
Speaker 2: when I got popcorn pizza, the whole vibe. He was
Speaker 2: still popping off his arm, like, shut all this down
Speaker 2: to go to give me your damn eyepass. Shut down
Speaker 2: the laptop like all that, take your ass upstairs, you
Speaker 2: go want to bid seven o'clock, Like you go to bid.
Speaker 2: He's still I'm like, take your ass to bid, and
Speaker 2: I shut down everything. And he woke go the next
Speaker 2: morning and he was cool, but he still had a
Speaker 2: little spice to him, and I'm like, dog, like I
Speaker 2: don't know what to do for it.
Speaker 1: So even after you took away all the fun stuff,
Speaker 1: he didn't wake up the next morning going dad, I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: Can I have my stuff back? Or he you can
Speaker 1: tell he woke up different.
Speaker 2: Maybe the long sleep that he had helped, but he
Speaker 2: still had a little bit of spice in him, like
Speaker 2: he was still a little bit like the punishment wasn't
Speaker 2: long enough.
Speaker 1: Thirteen.
Speaker 2: Oh it's thirteen, and that's in my mom I'm like Okay,
Speaker 2: you're clearly going through a change right now, and I
Speaker 2: need to not necessarily, I need to understand that and
Speaker 2: you know, walk through that with you. But that still
Speaker 2: doesn't give you license to act up.
Speaker 1: You know, I body slammed Jo. I'll get him in
Speaker 1: a second. Here him in our back, in our kitchen,
Speaker 1: and I know exactly where I was standing, right in
Speaker 1: front of the stove. He talked back and I looked
Speaker 1: at him and I said what and he said it again?
Speaker 1: And he was middle school and I literally picked him
Speaker 1: up and I picked him up, grabbed him and put
Speaker 1: him to the ground and got on top of him.
Speaker 1: It's like, you fat as it was. It wasn't funny
Speaker 1: to Chelsea. Chelsea was like, because Chelsea's like, how cav was.
Speaker 1: Chelsea's like, we do not touch the kids. We did that,
Speaker 1: and I go, Chelsea, I'm sorry. But he needed it
Speaker 1: at that moment. He needed that moment to have stone
Speaker 1: cold Steve dad. Yeah, you know that's how I'm feeling,
Speaker 1: dog like.
Speaker 2: I remember my dad and I we got into two
Speaker 2: kind of like fistfights when I was younger. One he
Speaker 2: took me outside and I don't remember if I ran
Speaker 2: back in and locked the door on him or what happened.
Speaker 2: But something happened there and then the other one was
Speaker 2: in my grandma bedroom and I caught him. But I
Speaker 2: remember when I was younger, we used to spend a
Speaker 2: lot of time at my grandma's house and my uncle
Speaker 2: the worst punishment that ever happened. He used to make
Speaker 2: me sit downstairs on the basement steps and he used
Speaker 2: to make me sit there for hours, bro, And I
Speaker 2: remember I used to fall asleep sometimes I was there
Speaker 2: so long. But that was the worst punishment ever. So
Speaker 2: I think immediately we try to go to physical and
Speaker 2: I don't like that for many reasons. I don't think
Speaker 2: that's the best way or the ultimate, you know, course correction.
Speaker 1: But I don't know. I need some help, bro. You
Speaker 1: know what. One two friends that offered to do something
Speaker 1: for me. I never did it with the keis and
Speaker 1: if you want to do it, we'll do it. One
Speaker 1: of the friends was the whole scared straight thing. He
Speaker 1: worked at the presence, yeah, and was basically just going
Speaker 1: see what it looks like. That was one of the
Speaker 1: things never did that. The other one was a friend
Speaker 1: of mine that wanted their church volunteered and they did
Speaker 1: the whole picking up stuff on the sides of the
Speaker 1: road things, but it was almost kind of like putting
Speaker 1: the kids to like labor where they had to do something. See,
Speaker 1: I don't think he need like his thing isn't to
Speaker 1: that extreme.
Speaker 2: Like I don't think I need to have him go
Speaker 2: to jail and do the scary straight thing or pick
Speaker 2: up trash. I think, honestly, maybe I just need to
Speaker 2: not give him as much freedom well so that when
Speaker 2: I take it away, it's not like this crazy you know,
Speaker 2: you give her UNO card.
Speaker 1: You basically said for two weeks, you could go to
Speaker 1: bed at any time you want to and you can
Speaker 1: do whatever you want to. I mean you kind of
Speaker 1: as are asking, you know, what to turn is.
Speaker 3: So does he get like this with Jasmin?
Speaker 1: And so this this week he with Jasmine.
Speaker 2: I mean, she's gonna call me sometimes and like she
Speaker 2: she said, Joe be crashing out sometimes, but it's mostly
Speaker 2: around like school work, Like he has a heavy load
Speaker 2: of schoolwork. So there will be moments whereas he just
Speaker 2: he's overwhelmed. Yeah, and she'll allow him to kind of
Speaker 2: like rage a little bit and being real and back in.
Speaker 2: But this had nothing to do with school where it's like,
Speaker 2: I don't think you had a reason for behaving the
Speaker 2: way you did other than the fact that you just
Speaker 2: wanted another night to stay to three am of roadblocks
Speaker 2: And I told you couldn't be on the call with
Speaker 2: the homies you on the call week.
Speaker 1: I mentioned this on the air when Shannon talked about, uh,
Speaker 1: you know Lucy a couple of weeks ago with something,
Speaker 1: and I said, when you are a middle school kid,
Speaker 1: your hormones are like crazy, You're going through a change
Speaker 1: in your body, like all this stuff. Middle school is
Speaker 1: the one time in my kid's life, the three years
Speaker 1: of my kid's life that I wish I could forget. Really,
Speaker 1: they oh, they hated apparently, you know us and Chelsea
Speaker 1: always understood it. I didn't understand it. I'm like, you know,
Speaker 1: why are they hating me? I didn't do anything that
Speaker 1: so hard?
Speaker 4: Like keV, I don't know what to do either half
Speaker 4: the time with lou and she's in sixth grade with
Speaker 4: Size and seventh grade, and it like I feel for
Speaker 4: their I feel for them and what they're going through
Speaker 4: and like these emotions that they don't know what to
Speaker 4: do with, And I feel like a crazy person because
Speaker 4: at the same time, I'm going through the same thing.
Speaker 4: So like when Lucy's crashing out, I feel like I
Speaker 4: start to crash out too, and that just makes the
Speaker 4: situation so much worse.
Speaker 5: So it's like I'm trying to like deflate. Is that
Speaker 5: even the word?
Speaker 4: Yeah, deflet myself before I like tend to her.
Speaker 1: It's hard.
Speaker 5: It's hard.
Speaker 1: Hi, Anthony, Hey, guys, what's going on morning?
Speaker 6: All right? So keV hear me out. I'm literally going
Speaker 6: through the same thing that you're going through with my
Speaker 6: son Jacob. But the problem is he's ten and in
Speaker 6: fifth grade. So when they go on like breaks and
Speaker 6: things like that, or even on the weekends, you know,
Speaker 6: I let him stay up talk this homies on social
Speaker 6: you know, the little social media and all that stuff,
Speaker 6: and the Fortnite calls that they're on. But there comes
Speaker 6: a time where I'm like, okay, Jacob is Sunday time,
Speaker 6: is said everything down. I usually have him shut everything
Speaker 6: down at a thirty He'll get an attitude and you know, again,
Speaker 6: I'm like you, I don't put my hands on my kid,
Speaker 6: but I'll give him a certain look and then he'll
Speaker 6: just start room raging through the room, trying to straighten
Speaker 6: stuff up, but messing it up at the same time.
Speaker 6: I'm like, oh, okay, that's what we're doing. So I
Speaker 6: don't know if you're familiar with what's going on. The
Speaker 6: new trend is like you know, how you make your
Speaker 6: kids exercise or do the Drew Hills or and all that. Yeah,
Speaker 6: So I'm like, Okay, you got all this energy, you
Speaker 6: want to roy, you want a room rage, Let's go ahead.
Speaker 6: Let's go out in the garage and go into the gym.
Speaker 6: Because my garage is a gym. I'm like, okay, cool,
Speaker 6: let's go out here. I said, you got five minutes
Speaker 6: of Drew Hils, and I'll tell you when to stop.
Speaker 6: Said I don't want to do that. I'm not trying
Speaker 6: to hear it.
Speaker 7: Go ahead, you got.
Speaker 6: All the energy, Let's go ahead and do that. Let's
Speaker 6: go ahead and go out here, and then maybe afterwards
Speaker 6: you think about how he came across with the situation,
Speaker 6: you know what I mean. So maybe make him do
Speaker 6: a few Drew Hills.
Speaker 2: So you know, Drew Hill to R and B group,
Speaker 2: So there are dance moves that take place in Drew Hill,
Speaker 2: so it's like a jump hop. So that's like the
Speaker 2: punishment was like over and over.
Speaker 1: Kevin put on five steps, so we gonna get busy, Kevin.
Speaker 1: My Joe just walked in. Joe, do you remember when
Speaker 1: you were in middle school and I wrestled your ass
Speaker 1: to the ground in the kitchen.
Speaker 3: I won that fight. I don't know what you're talking about, Joe.
Speaker 1: What happened?
Speaker 3: I don't know. I probably did What did I do?
Speaker 1: You were mouthing off, you were talking back.
Speaker 3: I think, yeah, I think I probably said something to
Speaker 3: my mom and then uh my mom gave my dad
Speaker 3: a look and was like, be the man.
Speaker 1: He was the only he was the only guy I
Speaker 1: knew I could take. I would never be able to
Speaker 1: take anybody else. But do you remember being in middle
Speaker 1: school and how difficult that was? Like the time that
Speaker 1: time of your life at all? Yeah, So because of
Speaker 1: Kev's son, Joe is going through that right now. He
Speaker 1: lets his kids stay up till three o'clock in the
Speaker 1: morning playing video games.
Speaker 3: Wait what really?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I do.
Speaker 2: So he's on spring break right now, he's got weeks off.
Speaker 2: He works very hard. Yeah, so he can stay up
Speaker 2: and do his thing till three. But the moment you
Speaker 2: tell him shut down, the laptop, turn off the game.
Speaker 2: It's not time to talk to these people anymore. All
Speaker 2: of a sudden, he's tried to get an attitude and
Speaker 2: he's starting to pop off any of those people, Joe
Speaker 2: and Jed.
Speaker 3: Joe say, hey, man, we were on a three game
Speaker 3: win streak. What the hell?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not having any Joe?
Speaker 3: Would you recommend that Kevin take it to a physical level?
Speaker 1: Do you think that at all helped you?
Speaker 3: That's a great question. And it absolutely beat your son.
Speaker 1: That's a good idea. All right, we got you turned out,
Speaker 1: it all worn out, hit him, and you don't have
Speaker 1: any bad memories of that time, do you?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 1: Okay, not at all.
Speaker 3: I probably deserved it.
Speaker 5: I would give anything to see video of.
Speaker 1: Called me a fat ass too. That was one time
Speaker 1: I called me a fat ass last time. What's going on, Colleen?
Speaker 1: How you doing?
Speaker 8: Hey?
Speaker 9: Good morning?
Speaker 1: Good morning?
Speaker 7: Hi Hi.
Speaker 9: I thought a few things. One I struggled personally as
Speaker 9: an adult, and one of my two children do just
Speaker 9: like transition phases. One I can go like, hey, we're
Speaker 9: shutting the TV off, No big deal. The other one
Speaker 9: needs you know, like, hey, this is the last twenty minutes. Hey,
Speaker 9: and ten minutes, Hey, in five minutes, they need like
Speaker 9: a kind of like a transitional type reminder. And then
Speaker 9: just as a punishment as a child, when I or
Speaker 9: my brothers would maybe act like this, my dad would
Speaker 9: take away our choices to make us realize how many
Speaker 9: choices we had. So, for example, if I started making
Speaker 9: bad decisions, like I knew tomorrow I was supposed to
Speaker 9: spend the day of my dad and he got popcorn
Speaker 9: and we're going to the movies and all these things,
Speaker 9: but I still decided to stay up till three am
Speaker 9: that morning and not send alarm and be all crabby
Speaker 9: and mean. Well, then that whole day, like he decided
Speaker 9: what I wanted to eat? Were my brothers got to pick?
Speaker 9: He decided this? You know this, So throughout the day,
Speaker 9: I'd realized, like, dang, I get to make a lot
Speaker 9: of decisions. I'd better start making, Like.
Speaker 3: Do you have the game time around keV? Do you
Speaker 3: have a station lockdown?
Speaker 2: Then no, he's a he's a PC gamer. So it's
Speaker 2: all like it was a little computer.
Speaker 5: So could you just could you set screen time?
Speaker 1: I don't know, I'll share it.
Speaker 3: He's probably really smart. He'll probably learn how to hack
Speaker 3: into he'll set a screen timeer on your phone.
Speaker 1: What's up, Ashley?
Speaker 3: Hi, good morning, how are you guys?
Speaker 1: Good morning? Okay, what's going on? So?
Speaker 8: I am a child and family therapist. So one of
Speaker 8: the questions that I had, and it sounds like you
Speaker 8: guys had already answered, it, was was he talking to
Speaker 8: friends while he was on his devices when you told
Speaker 8: him to turn it off?
Speaker 2: Maybe I don't know for sure, let's just say yes,
Speaker 2: let's just say yeah, he was okay.
Speaker 8: So at thirteen, developmentally kids really could care less about
Speaker 8: family members and wanting to be a part of like
Speaker 8: their family group. They are way more interested in worrying
Speaker 8: about their friends and fitting in. And if I mean,
Speaker 8: you guys have to think back when you were that
Speaker 8: age and how much you were. It's always the what's.
Speaker 7: The hottest trend? What can I wear? What can how
Speaker 7: can I fit in with my peers? And in a
Speaker 7: lot of ways, you are getting in the way of that,
Speaker 7: Like you are you telling him to turn off the device.
Speaker 7: You are now a barrier of.
Speaker 8: Him continuing to fit in with his friends and communicate
Speaker 8: with them in the ways that he wants to. So
Speaker 8: obviously touchy feely therapist over here. I'm also a mom,
Speaker 8: so I get it.
Speaker 6: But what I.
Speaker 8: Would say is I don't necessarily disagree with the last
Speaker 8: color with transitions times either giving like warnings of hey man,
Speaker 8: ten more minutes and then we're going to turn off
Speaker 8: the devices to do whatever comes next. The other thing
Speaker 8: that you could do is you could talk to him
Speaker 8: of what's going to be the best way for you
Speaker 8: and I to be able to communicate. When I say
Speaker 8: enough is enough? You understand and you comply, like what
Speaker 8: does he feel like he might need from you? And
Speaker 8: I understand at the end of the day, you're the parent.
Speaker 8: What you say goes. But to give him that mutual
Speaker 8: respect of Okay, I see you and what you're trying
Speaker 8: to do and where you are in your phase of life.
Speaker 8: How can we work together in order for us to
Speaker 8: be able to make it a smoother transition for.
Speaker 1: Both of us? All right, wish wish.
Speaker 8: Our name doctor, not a doctor, but my name's Ashley.
Speaker 2: All right, therapist, Ashley. Let me ask you this. I'm
Speaker 2: not saying is right or wrong? You know, I'm just
Speaker 2: giving you a like a I was brought up, so
Speaker 2: when I was brought up, it was I don't give
Speaker 2: a damn who you talking to. I don't give a
Speaker 2: damn what you doing. When you see me call you,
Speaker 2: when you hear my voice or you see my car
Speaker 2: pull up. I don't stop talking to your little friends
Speaker 2: and come when I tell you to come. And that
Speaker 2: worked for me. When you think about that, I think
Speaker 2: you should do the Drewill anytime my mom or my
Speaker 2: grandma called my name I was on the way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that, actually that's wonderful therapy, and I
Speaker 1: think that's probably great. But I also think that there's
Speaker 1: levels that maybe maybe he needs to get a little
Speaker 1: bit of uh not. You know, I'm never gonna hit
Speaker 1: but maybe the exercise maybe the thing, because I don't
Speaker 1: know if Josiah is an exercise kind of guy, but
Speaker 1: the dad who says I take him out into the
Speaker 1: garage and I say, we're going to get some energy
Speaker 1: out of you. You know what I mean? Like that
Speaker 1: that might be the thing he needs.
Speaker 2: We're gonna start with the drew Hills. I'm gonna impletimate that.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you, Yeah, or am I just sit on
Speaker 1: him like you do? I told joe I said, just
Speaker 1: a second ago, my son Joey said, get off the
Speaker 1: air with me right now, or I will wrestle your