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Speaker 1: Marks the Moons on WR Well, Hey, Jackie Martlin, Jackie

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Speaker 1: the joke Man, the great comedian. By the way, if

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Speaker 1: you're in Long Island tonight, he'll be at McGuire's Comedy Club, Bohemia,

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Speaker 1: Long Island, and millions of jokes. Also he does a

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Speaker 1: Q and A afterwards. That's tonight at seven point thirty.

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Speaker 1: We got a lot of listeners in Florida. He'll be

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Speaker 1: there April eighteenth, vent to Reno's Estero, Florida, and he's

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Speaker 1: with us right now. Jackie Martling, how you doing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm doing good. Mark. Everything is fine. It looks

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Speaker 2: like the rain might stop within the next couple of weeks,

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Speaker 2: so that's exciting.

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Speaker 1: You know, stops already. Hey, I got to ask you something.

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Speaker 2: And you're gonna ask me anything, all right.

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Speaker 1: I'm going through the Epstein files. Apparently Epstein, you're in there.

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Speaker 1: Nothing bad, nothing bad. But apparently this guy was a

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Speaker 1: huge fan of yours.

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Speaker 2: What you know what? He was on my joke Land

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Speaker 2: email list and every month I used to send ten

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Speaker 2: or fifteen pages of filthy jokes to about twenty five

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Speaker 2: thousand people. So these poor guys that are going through

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Speaker 2: the Epstein files I guess every once in a while,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to hit on this oasis of ten pages

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Speaker 2: of filthy joke. So I up. They're enjoying themselves.

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Speaker 1: But they tell us about He apparently was a huge

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Speaker 1: fan of comedians, you and Gilbert Godfried, a lot of

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Speaker 1: Nick DePaulo.

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Speaker 2: You. No, he'd liked comics, but he loved jokes, like

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Speaker 2: a lot of smart people love jokes, especially dirty jokes.

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Speaker 2: I know if dere would tell you, Albert Einstein's favorite

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Speaker 2: joke is a true story, Albert Einstein. I heard this

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Speaker 2: from a guy whose grandfather was good friends with Albert Einstein,

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Speaker 2: and because he was a famous canter at the turn

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Speaker 2: of the century. He said, Albert Einstein's favorite joke was

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Speaker 2: my penis isn't that long? But I love every foot

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Speaker 2: of it. How great is that? I love the fact

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Speaker 2: that they loved dirty jokes. You know, everybody loves them.

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Speaker 1: But tell us about Epstein. Though you go to his house,

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Speaker 1: he had these big dinners with the comedians or lunches.

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Speaker 2: I went to one dinner there with the guys, and

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Speaker 2: it was just great. This is long before yeah, long

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Speaker 2: before anything was going on. You know, it was like

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Speaker 2: April of twenty fifteen, so nobody really knew anything about him. Hey,

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Speaker 2: I'm a comedian. A free dinner with a bunch of

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Speaker 2: other comedians. You know, you couldn't keep me away from that,

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Speaker 2: you know.

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Speaker 1: And you know this guy Bobby Slayton, the comedian, he's

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Speaker 1: a friend, yes, apparently he is. Epstein was a huge

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Speaker 1: fan of his. Used to give him an apartment whenever

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Speaker 1: he came to New York.

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Speaker 2: And well, you know, no comedian is ever going to

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Speaker 2: turn down a free of free lunch. You know the

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Speaker 2: story about a famous I'm not going to say it was,

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Speaker 2: but a very famous you know, singer, composer, songwriter, and

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Speaker 2: they said they were thinking they're using one of his

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Speaker 2: songs in a movie, and it was a really rich guy.

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Speaker 2: So they went to the rich guy's house and the

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Speaker 2: rich guy served him a really incredible meal and it

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Speaker 2: was wonderful, and then they watched the movie and they said, well,

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Speaker 2: what do you think you want to put one of

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Speaker 2: your songs in this movie? Says, you know, I really

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Speaker 2: don't know. I think I need to see it again.

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Speaker 2: So they came back the next night and had another

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Speaker 2: huge dinner, and then he said no, and his friend

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Speaker 2: said you never intended on letting the music music, he said, no,

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Speaker 2: But man, those dinners were great. That tells the whole story.

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Speaker 1: He put it out. Every star, comedian, celebrity when they're

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Speaker 1: on the road, every town they got some rich guy

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Speaker 1: who's a big fan, who takes you out.

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Speaker 2: It never fails, and they are always great people, and

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Speaker 2: you know you cannot lose.

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Speaker 1: All.

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Speaker 2: Right, on to the jokes. So two girlfriends running into

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Speaker 2: each other. First one says, you should see the guy

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Speaker 2: I'm seeing. He's got a ferrari, a beach house, and

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Speaker 2: he's tampton. He buys me the old guys a jewelry. The

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Speaker 2: other girl says, all the guy I'm seeing as an eriction.

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Speaker 2: It sticks out so far twelve canaries can perch on it.

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Speaker 2: So then the next week they run into each other

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Speaker 2: and the first girl says, you know, I got to

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Speaker 2: tell you I exaggerated last week. My guy doesn't have

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Speaker 2: a ferrari to dodge dart, and his beach house is

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Speaker 2: a little house in Leathertown with an inflatable pool. The

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Speaker 2: only thing he's ever given me is a few beers

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Speaker 2: to get me in bed. The second girl says, well,

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Speaker 2: I exaggerated a bit too. The twelfth canary has to

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Speaker 2: stand on one foot. He's a class. That's a classic.

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Speaker 2: So a guy because the part I can't take it.

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Speaker 2: I can't take it. My wife walks around all day

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Speaker 2: and crotchless panties. The part that this is crotchless panties.

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Speaker 2: Oh that sounds hot as hell. The guy says, yeah,

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Speaker 2: the only problem is they weren't crotchless when she bought them.

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Speaker 2: So three nuns, here you go. Three nuns are standing

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Speaker 2: on the street corner when a flasher walks up and

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Speaker 2: he opens up his raincoat. The first nun has a stroke,

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Speaker 2: second one has a stroke, and the third nun doesn't

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Speaker 2: touch him.

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Speaker 1: I can't say that.

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Speaker 2: Here the push again?

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 2: Truck A truck driver goes into a brothel and he

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Speaker 2: hands the man of a thousand bucks. He says, I

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Speaker 2: want you rub to this woman and a baroney sandwich.

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Speaker 2: She says, for a thousand dollars, you can have my

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Speaker 2: prettiest girl and surf and turf. He says, look, lady,

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Speaker 2: I ain't horny. I'm homesick. So old lady pushes her

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Speaker 2: car to a gas station. The mechanic says, what's the matter.

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Speaker 2: She's that conked out. He opens the horden. In a

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Speaker 2: few minutes, the car's pouring like a kitten. She says,

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Speaker 2: what's the story. The mechanic says, grapping the carburetor. She says,

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Speaker 2: how often I got.

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Speaker 1: To do that? Now, Jackie. Yeah, it's a two weeks

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Speaker 1: till spring. You're in Bayville, Long Island. It's right on

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Speaker 1: the beach. This must be the best time of year.

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Speaker 1: Like you're just getting ready to take advantage of the weather.

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Speaker 2: It's the way all the snow is melted. Another month

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Speaker 2: will be in the water. It's it's just fantastic. A

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Speaker 2: big show tonight out in Bohemia, and then I got

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Speaker 2: the rest of the weekend to hang with the family

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Speaker 2: and you know, starting trying to get the yard put

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Speaker 2: back together after you know, the winter blows everything all

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Speaker 2: over the place and the place is a mess. But

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Speaker 2: now it's going to be beautiful again. I just love it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Jackie martinly gonna be at McGuire's Comedy Club tonight, Bohemia,

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Speaker 1: Long Island, seven point thirty. And then you're going to Florida.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm going to Florida see an old friend. I'm

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Speaker 2: going up there Stero to work at Venturinos in a Stero.

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Speaker 2: I never heard of that town before, but I but

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Speaker 2: the guy's got a great comedy club down there, so

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Speaker 2: I'm gonna go down and give it a shot. You know,

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Speaker 2: it's nothing like a trip to Florida in the winter.

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Speaker 2: You know, it's always fun.

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Speaker 1: Was it easier to get people to laugh in Florida

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Speaker 1: or in the Ark?

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Speaker 2: Don't make you know, it's the same people, Mark now Florida,

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Speaker 2: Florida is just Queen's with palm trees. Hey, So guy

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Speaker 2: walks in from workings a stranger start naked with his

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Speaker 2: wife on the living room floor. The guy says, glory,

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Speaker 2: and what are you doing. She turns to the stranger

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Speaker 2: and says, I told you he was stupid. Oh, here's

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Speaker 2: one of those questions for you. What would you call

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Speaker 2: a guy with no arms? So a guy London nor hooker.

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Speaker 2: And she's got an incredible set of jugs, big huge hooters.

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Speaker 2: He says, Hey, lady, how much to kiss those? She

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Speaker 2: says a hundred bucks, takes them by the hand, leads

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Speaker 2: them into an alley. She takes the top off. The

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Speaker 2: guy puts his nose down between her boobs starts nuzzling,

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Speaker 2: and it keeps nuzzling. She says, well, you're gonna kiss

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Speaker 2: him or not? He says, I'd love to, lady, but

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Speaker 2: I can't afford it. Now, that's pretty stupid. I love them.

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Speaker 1: Though, No, they're great. So hey, everybody, also get the documentary.

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Speaker 1: I love that documentary on you. It's on Amazon Prime, right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and one more people are noticing it. You know.

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Speaker 2: I keep getting emails from people, and there's a lot

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Speaker 2: of stuff in there. People have no idea about me,

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Speaker 2: which is really fun, you know, and it's great. And

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Speaker 2: out here I've been doing ads for a pot dispensary.

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Speaker 2: It's like, I guess I am never going to grow up, Mark.

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Speaker 2: I guess that's you know.

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Speaker 1: I don't see who as the pot type. But okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm kidding. I'm kidding. So but watch this documentary. It's

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Speaker 1: called Joke Man. It's on Amazon Prime. You love it.

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Speaker 2: So I've been doing a million of those comics. Do

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Speaker 2: you do those? Do you do cameos?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: Oh, well you don't need the money, but you know,

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Speaker 2: I don't even need I just love doing them because

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Speaker 2: I sit there and do five minutes worth of jokes.

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Speaker 2: It's like a warm up for anything, you know, and

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Speaker 2: I get paid for doing it. And you know, people say, oh,

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Speaker 2: my mother, you know, she loves potty jokes and she

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Speaker 2: hates my father and they live in Florida. And I

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Speaker 2: just go down the list and do ten jokes about

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Speaker 2: those topics or whatever they want, you know, and I

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Speaker 2: get tips and I get good write ups. You know,

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Speaker 2: it's it's made for an idiot like me. You know,

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Speaker 2: all these jokes are sitting there going to waste and boom.

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Speaker 1: You know, just go to cameo dot com slash Jackie Martling.

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Speaker 1: Hey was just by out of time, give us one more.

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Speaker 2: So. Two guys are sitting in the bar and a

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Speaker 2: pretty girl walks in. The first guy says, wow, she's

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Speaker 2: an eight second. Guys is at one. Another pretty girl

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Speaker 2: walks in. The first guy says, wow, she's an eight

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Speaker 2: five second. Guys as one. Then a really stunner, a

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Speaker 2: beautiful girl walks in. The first guy says, my god,

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Speaker 2: look at her. Nine to five second guys, is may

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Speaker 2: be it? Two first guys? Wait there, wait a minute.

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Speaker 2: Those first two girls were really pretty, but this last

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Speaker 2: girl's incredible. How the hell could you give her a

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Speaker 2: two on a one to ten scale. Second guy says,

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Speaker 2: I don't use that old one to ten scale. I

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Speaker 2: used the Budweiser system. The first guy says, the Budweiser system.

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Speaker 2: What's that? He says, that's how many Clydesdales had. Take

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Speaker 2: the ripper off my face. Hey, hello, the boys at

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Speaker 2: Bayville Seafood. They are so excited because it's spring and

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Speaker 2: they're gonna sell so much stuff. And then I'm gonna

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Speaker 2: steal some shrimp out the back door. And it's that simple.

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Speaker 2: I said, have a great show.

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Speaker 1: You soon, Jackie Martlin Tonight McGuire's Comedy Club Bohemia. Who'll

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Speaker 1: be there tonight seven thirty Jackie Martlin, thanks for being.

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Speaker 2: With us, Smart, I'll talk here thick here. Uh.

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Speaker 1: Hey, don't forget Bucking Clay at noon today, right after

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Speaker 1: the news. Uh. And remember Curtis Sleewas starts Monday. This Monday,

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Speaker 1: he'll be joining the morning show. It'll be Curtis and

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Speaker 1: Larry every morning six to ten right here on WR

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Speaker 1: starting Monday,