WEBVTT - Baked or Nah

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<v Speaker 1>So I need a relax right now. I just need

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<v Speaker 1>something to relax. What do you want to take a

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<v Speaker 1>shot of it? I don't know. No, no, I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>touching any of those things. I'm not touching those So

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<v Speaker 1>I Chelsea went yesterday morning, and I don't know why

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<v Speaker 1>it is. I got so jealous about this, but I

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<v Speaker 1>was like, so horribly jealous. She could have been in

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<v Speaker 1>the arms of another man and I would have been

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<v Speaker 1>fine with them, but she wasn't. She woke up in

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<v Speaker 1>the morning early and she goes, oh, I got an appointment.

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<v Speaker 1>I go, who has an appointment? She was praying to

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<v Speaker 1>another god. She was praying to the god called the

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<v Speaker 1>massage God. Oh, she went and got a massage yesterday. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>So Chelsea went and got a massage. And I was

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<v Speaker 1>very jealous of this because I'm the type of person

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<v Speaker 1>that when I know that somebody is getting pampered and

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<v Speaker 1>it's not me, I'm jealous. I want to get pampered.

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<v Speaker 1>Like when Chelsea says, hey, I've got a manicure, pedicure appointment,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm like, I want to be there too, Like I

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<v Speaker 1>want to be there. I want to be I want

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<v Speaker 1>to look pretty, you know, and I want to be relaxed.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'm like, okay, I guess you got to go

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<v Speaker 1>get your massage. Well, she left for an hour and

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<v Speaker 1>a half or something, came back from it, and she

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<v Speaker 1>was so relaxed, like I've never seen her this relaxed,

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<v Speaker 1>and with all the stuff going on, I was so

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<v Speaker 1>happy for her for a minute. And then I said,

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<v Speaker 1>and then I said to her, can you call Chelsea

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<v Speaker 1>real quick? Then I said to her, I said, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I'd like to get a massage. And I normally don't

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<v Speaker 1>like massages. I'm really not a massage person. Like we

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<v Speaker 1>one time did a couple's massage, and the entire time

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<v Speaker 1>we were doing it, I talked to Chelsea like this

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<v Speaker 1>was not relaxing because I sat there and was asking

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<v Speaker 1>both of the massuse's mussou eyes whatever, however it is plural.

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<v Speaker 1>I said to both of them, I'm like, hey, tell

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<v Speaker 1>me a little bit about your story. In Chelsea's like,

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<v Speaker 1>when I get a massage, I don't want to hear

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<v Speaker 1>about anybody's story. I want to just have the music

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<v Speaker 1>playing in the background and stuff. So I said to Chelsea,

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<v Speaker 1>I go, Chelse, I would love to get a massage.

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<v Speaker 1>I said, did you think that there was any way

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<v Speaker 1>that you could, you know, call this person and see

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<v Speaker 1>if they can make an appointment for me or do

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<v Speaker 1>something like that. She says there's one problem, and I said,

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<v Speaker 1>what's that? And she goes, you gotta be completely naked

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<v Speaker 1>to get this massage. Wow, let me talk to Chelsea.

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<v Speaker 1>Are you there, Chelsea?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm here.

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<v Speaker 1>So she says, you gotta be completely naked in order

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<v Speaker 1>to get this massage.

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<v Speaker 3>Wait, how came like I always just wear my underwear too?

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<v Speaker 4>Well?

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<v Speaker 3>I oh, I wear my underwear for that? Do I

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<v Speaker 3>get those?

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<v Speaker 1>You gotta go to this guy? Wait a second, So

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<v Speaker 1>when you said that, it made me go, all right,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm out because I don't like to be naked. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't like it. I like to me, if I get

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<v Speaker 1>a massage, I feel like I at least have to

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<v Speaker 1>have something covering me up. You know what I mean?

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<v Speaker 1>Like I feel like I need at least have to

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<v Speaker 1>be somewhat naked, Chelse, something to hold you down.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, respectful about it though, Like they have a blanket

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<v Speaker 5>over you and they fold it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you are fully covered. Anytime anything is exposed, there's

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<v Speaker 2>a towel that quickly goes over you know, anything that

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<v Speaker 2>can be exposed. Nothing is exposed.

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<v Speaker 1>Ever, Chelsea, I'm afraid to be vulnerable. Even when you

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<v Speaker 1>and I have sex together, there are times I don't

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<v Speaker 1>even want to take my underwear off. You know, There's

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<v Speaker 1>there's something about it I feel like I have to.

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<v Speaker 5>Like.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know how how listeners feel about this one,

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<v Speaker 1>but are you the type of person that, if you

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<v Speaker 1>get a massage, do you go completely naked during the

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<v Speaker 1>massage or do you at least keep something on?

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<v Speaker 2>Like I one time had I note, this is the

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<v Speaker 2>first time I've ever done it where I've gone completely.

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<v Speaker 1>Naked and it was good. Huh, you liked it?

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<v Speaker 2>I liked the massage, which I feel much better to.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, do you really like? Do you actually like feel

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<v Speaker 1>like like it was it worth it waking up on

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<v Speaker 1>a Sunday morning and doing it?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh?

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah for sure?

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<v Speaker 1>Is a user's choice, like if you go get a massage,

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<v Speaker 1>do you just decide to d robe or is it guilty?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's emphatic, so maybe that's different. But I've had

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<v Speaker 2>other massages where I've always cut my odor on.

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<v Speaker 1>What does lymphatic mean? Can you explain?

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<v Speaker 2>Just google or your lymph nodes are so it helps drain.

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<v Speaker 2>So you she works on my face, my neck, around

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<v Speaker 2>my collarbone, under my armpits, and then around my stomach

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<v Speaker 2>and then like you know, in your hip and growing area, and.

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<v Speaker 1>Then they.

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<v Speaker 6>Really exactly are there any are there any so interesting?

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<v Speaker 1>Are there any lymphoids where my noids? Noids are?

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<v Speaker 2>Now you're doing make sure you can never get one?

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<v Speaker 1>Like, let me tell you my comfort level. And I

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<v Speaker 1>want to know what the listeners are with this. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't have a comfort level of being naked to a

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<v Speaker 1>point that I've gone into saunas wearing clothes and the

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<v Speaker 1>guys that I've visit the saunas with are all like,

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<v Speaker 1>what are you doing? Like I don't even want to

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<v Speaker 1>just go in with a towel around my my Have

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<v Speaker 1>you ever been in a sauna before with a group

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<v Speaker 1>of guys? Maybe when I was younger, not that I

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<v Speaker 1>can actually remember. I'm imagine going there with Kevin, these

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<v Speaker 1>guys that so that there's a there's this place that

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<v Speaker 1>that I'll go to from time to time and these

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<v Speaker 1>guys will all get into the sauna naked together and

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<v Speaker 1>to me and the guys will take their things off,

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<v Speaker 1>and they're just sitting there and I'm going, this is weird.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't do it.

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<v Speaker 3>Has you went there?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, no, it wasn't that. The other one too, is

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<v Speaker 1>I remember my dad used to be the type of

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<v Speaker 1>guy and Chelsea, you loved my dad, I know, but

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<v Speaker 1>I don't even want you to picture this. My dad

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<v Speaker 1>loved going into whirlpools, like he would call them, not

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<v Speaker 1>like chacoozies and stuff he would call them. I used

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<v Speaker 1>to love whirlpool and naked.

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<v Speaker 2>You love walking around the house naked now in the

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<v Speaker 2>morning when you get ready for work.

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<v Speaker 1>But that's because you're there. And but if you know,

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<v Speaker 1>if Luke was home, I wouldn't do it.

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<v Speaker 2>I think he did it when Mayo's here.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, but he sleeps till like noon. Oh well, that's true.

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<v Speaker 1>They were down in the basement Chelsea's friends staying at

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<v Speaker 1>the house, and I walked out naked to the kitchen

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<v Speaker 1>and Chelsea thought it was so weird. It's funny. It's

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<v Speaker 1>funny though, because I want to get a massage, but

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<v Speaker 1>I'm so afraid to get a massage and uh and

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<v Speaker 1>have to be exposed. I don't know. Hold on a second,

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<v Speaker 1>real quick Chelse, Jordan, what's up, Jordan? How you doing?

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<v Speaker 5>So you talk too much during the massage. She wants

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<v Speaker 5>to relax, and you don't want to be naked duringham

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<v Speaker 5>of course she's gonna tell you have to be naked.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait a second, Chelsea, are you trying to throw me

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<v Speaker 1>off here by saying this? Or do you have to

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<v Speaker 1>be nam Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, Jordan, he has my secrets.

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<v Speaker 1>What's up, unique, Hi, it's Mojo in the morning.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey Mojo.

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<v Speaker 4>So I always wear my nan my underwear when I

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<v Speaker 4>go get a massage because I used to get full

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<v Speaker 4>backing messages all the time and I had a weirdo

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<v Speaker 4>and he was touching in places that he shouldn't have

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<v Speaker 4>been touching in.

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<v Speaker 3>So sounds like you're always were.

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<v Speaker 6>Yeah, that happened to my sister too. Really, Yes, I

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<v Speaker 6>was a place in Chicago. It was a girl.

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<v Speaker 1>It was a girl touching. But was she like doing

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<v Speaker 1>it as a massage or was she doing it no

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<v Speaker 1>is my sister. It was the very first massage my

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<v Speaker 1>sister ever got. This was a few years ago, and

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<v Speaker 1>when she was done, she was like, I will never

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<v Speaker 1>ever do that again. And I thought, oh my gosh,

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<v Speaker 1>how do you how do you not like, like, I

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<v Speaker 1>love getting massages? And she said, is it normal that

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<v Speaker 1>the woman and then described to me what she did.

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<v Speaker 6>And I was like, I feel like we need to

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<v Speaker 6>call the police.

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<v Speaker 1>No, that is not normal. Yeah, that's craziness. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 6>It was a massage in her apartment building in downtown Chicago,

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<v Speaker 6>like a massage place.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait crazy, Wait a second. They they had apartment building

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<v Speaker 1>massage like it was. They had like a place where

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<v Speaker 1>you get there.

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<v Speaker 6>Was grocery store, a dry cleaner. You know how it

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<v Speaker 6>is in big cities there's usually like retail on the

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<v Speaker 6>first level. And then and so she just decided to

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<v Speaker 6>try it there and that happened to her.

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<v Speaker 3>She's never gone again.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, it's crazy. She trained under Larry Nasser. Jeez,

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<v Speaker 1>or what never? I don't want to say that. You

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<v Speaker 1>want to say, you want to say something good. It's

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<v Speaker 1>good for you, Chelsea. Kevin's growing up. He's catching himself

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<v Speaker 1>before he says something he shouldn't say. And then unbelievable,

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<v Speaker 1>How unbelievable. Aren't you proud?

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<v Speaker 2>So proud?

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<v Speaker 1>What's up? SHAWNA?

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<v Speaker 2>Hi?

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<v Speaker 7>Hey, how are you guys?

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<v Speaker 1>We're good? What's going on? Shauna?

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<v Speaker 7>So I always go for massages and my pants and

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<v Speaker 7>I go frequently and he always keeps his underground two

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<v Speaker 7>but I always go nude. Excuse me? And uh, the

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<v Speaker 7>one time I talked him into actually going nude and

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<v Speaker 7>they put the towel over you and we're getting ready

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<v Speaker 7>to go, when he said, as soon as the lady

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<v Speaker 7>came in and the first thing she was ripped the

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<v Speaker 7>towel off of him. This has never happened to me before.

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<v Speaker 7>We got a coupon for a massage, so it was

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<v Speaker 7>a new place to us. And he said, this messuse

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<v Speaker 7>touched him in places I have not room together.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait, so during the couple's massage, she is inappropriately touching

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<v Speaker 1>your husband.

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<v Speaker 7>She was rubbing between his butt cheeks and he never

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<v Speaker 7>ever does. He always kept his underwear.

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<v Speaker 1>And he did she wash her hands afterwards.

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<v Speaker 7>I hope, So I don't even go there.

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<v Speaker 1>My god, hold on, missfit Tony is on the phone

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<v Speaker 1>with us right now.

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<v Speaker 5>Welcome back. We already was beck, is you party like

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<v Speaker 5>a rock star? We could go?

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<v Speaker 7>So welcome b thank you, yeah, yeah.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, welcome back. Listen. Soon as I hit that massage room,

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<v Speaker 5>I'm naked, naked down, everything down, no pile. No nothing.

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<v Speaker 5>I can't wait till lay there and get it all

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<v Speaker 5>about all of it. Baby, some naked is a jay bird.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait, that's so. How often you got massages? Do you

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<v Speaker 1>get a lot of massages?

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<v Speaker 5>I'm in there. I'm in there once every couple of months. Oh,

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<v Speaker 5>I go crazy with it. But my favorite massages is

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<v Speaker 5>going at like two three o'clock in the morning. Yeah yeah,

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<v Speaker 5>Oh my god. I'd be like, yeah, yeah, it's fell right.

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<v Speaker 1>That's a Miskegan, isn't that That's a Miskeigan massage?

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<v Speaker 5>Hey, so yeah, butt naked is the way to go

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<v Speaker 5>for my five.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, well, talk to you Land and tell me

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<v Speaker 5>God