WEBVTT - Elfstrophe 

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<v Speaker 1>Mojo in the morning show. The phone numbers eight for

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<v Speaker 1>forur Mojo Live. The text is nine five to five

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<v Speaker 1>zero zero. Shannon had something crazy happen at her house yesterday.

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<v Speaker 2>You call it an elf tastrophe, an elf emergency.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, you gotta label that, by the way,

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<v Speaker 1>as the title, Zach is there an elf hospital.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, let me tell you Anna, So we have three

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<v Speaker 3>elves in our house. Okay, we have Rice Krispy Tree,

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<v Speaker 3>the og that came for Lucy when she was three

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<v Speaker 3>years old. We have candy Cane sprinkles, and then Wes

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<v Speaker 3>and his kids have Freddy. So Freddy is now a

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<v Speaker 3>part of our crew. Plus three elf pets. So it

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<v Speaker 3>is a it is. The elves are busy in our

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<v Speaker 3>house every single night. And so earlier in the week,

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<v Speaker 3>the elves were, you know, up to their mischief and

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<v Speaker 3>they were digging through our couch cushions, and so there

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<v Speaker 3>was stuff their little butts were sticking up from you know,

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<v Speaker 3>the couch cushions. Their heads were down there, and there

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<v Speaker 3>was also of stuff that they brought up, like money

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<v Speaker 3>and legos and old food and nurf gun bullets and.

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<v Speaker 2>All the things.

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<v Speaker 3>So that that was what they got into Well, my

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<v Speaker 3>naughty but very cute dog Bow decided that he was

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<v Speaker 3>hungry and he felt like elf for breakfast, and so

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<v Speaker 3>he ate the elves that had created a scene on

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<v Speaker 3>the couch.

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<v Speaker 2>He ate he ate the two girl elves. Freddy was elsewhere.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I mean I'd eat candy cane sprinkles. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>So they were in really, really, really bad shape. And

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<v Speaker 3>any parent knows you are not allowed to touch the

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<v Speaker 3>elves or they lose their magic and they cannot go

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<v Speaker 3>back to the north pole at night and tell Sanna,

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<v Speaker 3>you know about the behavior in the house that day.

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<v Speaker 2>So Smith, my eight year old, was just in full.

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<v Speaker 3>Panic mode when he got home and saw the elves

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<v Speaker 3>had been eaten by the damn dog.

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<v Speaker 2>So he started praying over them. Actually, I have a

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<v Speaker 2>video of it.

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<v Speaker 3>He started praying over them, and then we had to

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<v Speaker 3>perform surgery with kitchen tongs and oven mits to put

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<v Speaker 3>them back together and clean them up. And then he

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<v Speaker 3>told me that he had seen somewhere that if you

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<v Speaker 3>sprinkle them with cinnamon, you you, they can get their magic.

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<v Speaker 4>I don't have kids yet, elfloor.

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<v Speaker 5>Okay, fair sprinkling, yeah, yeah, oh no, And then maybe yeah,

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<v Speaker 5>but I don't want it to stem their outfits.

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<v Speaker 2>When they go back to the North, Sana is gonna

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<v Speaker 2>be like, what the heck.

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<v Speaker 6>Are you?

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<v Speaker 2>Did you make this up?

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<v Speaker 6>No?

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<v Speaker 7>I swearch just to do this.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, I'm gonna.

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<v Speaker 3>Guys, got his face. I swear he made this up.

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<v Speaker 3>They're still in everyone.

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<v Speaker 4>Up didn't work?

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<v Speaker 3>Yep, they are. They look great. They went back to

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<v Speaker 3>see Sannah.

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<v Speaker 4>We got as well. We gotta post that video.

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<v Speaker 2>That is no, we are, We're we can post it

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<v Speaker 2>on the story, but you're not posting it.

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<v Speaker 8>Why not?

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<v Speaker 2>Why I look like holy hell in that video.

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<v Speaker 3>I have no makeup on, I have all my face creams,

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<v Speaker 3>and my skin is sagging to the floor. No, wait

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<v Speaker 3>a second, you can post hand of story so it

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<v Speaker 3>disappears after twenty four hours, Bianca, and that is it.

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<v Speaker 4>Everyone's gonna see it anyways.

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<v Speaker 2>If we twenty four hours on the story on my.

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<v Speaker 9>Face, if we sprinkle cinnamon on those cheeks where they

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<v Speaker 9>lived in heaven, that's.

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<v Speaker 3>Atop self conscious. In this video, I literally looked like

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<v Speaker 3>my grandmother.

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<v Speaker 4>Let's do this. Let's no filter it so Shannon looks.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I don't want to filter.

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<v Speaker 4>That looks like a like a grown man story.

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<v Speaker 2>That's it all right?

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<v Speaker 1>Eight four four Mojo Live eight four four six six

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<v Speaker 1>five six five four eight What was your elf task?

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<v Speaker 2>Would you call it an elf tastrophe?

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<v Speaker 1>Elf tastrophe? What was your elf tastrophe? What? What happened

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<v Speaker 1>to your your elf? That, by the way, is honestly

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<v Speaker 1>the reason why I'm happy that the the kids are

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<v Speaker 1>past the elf stage of things that becomes crazy.

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<v Speaker 2>It is so funny.

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<v Speaker 3>Yesterday the elves painted everybody's toennails in the house, everybody, everybody.

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<v Speaker 1>You said something interesting, you said that Wes's two kids

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<v Speaker 1>have elves.

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<v Speaker 3>They have an elf Freddy yep, that they've had since

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<v Speaker 3>they were babies, since.

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<v Speaker 4>They were babies, and they still like that still.

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<v Speaker 2>Goes off still, I thought already back to.

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<v Speaker 4>The North Pole. Yeah, we had a couple.

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<v Speaker 9>Yeah, now you know, we're cheaper than other ones where it.

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<v Speaker 4>Was a little because you bought at a dollar came

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<v Speaker 4>from the dollar Star.

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<v Speaker 3>Let me tell you how we've got we got We

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<v Speaker 3>had one elf, Riis Krispy Tree. Mojo nosis was you

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<v Speaker 3>know our original one. Well, then Andrew and I got divorced,

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<v Speaker 3>and so Rice Krispy Tree had to go between two houses.

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<v Speaker 2>And she there was a mess up.

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<v Speaker 3>There was a mess up, and so we had to

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<v Speaker 3>another elf had to come, actually both of us. First

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<v Speaker 3>it was Andrew, but another elf had to come. And

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<v Speaker 3>Lucy was like, that is not Rice Krispy treat. So

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<v Speaker 3>we were like, oh, this is another.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a new one.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, Gloria, trying to explain this very before we talk

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<v Speaker 1>about the elf. Don't you want to see shannons sagging skin?

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<v Speaker 4>You guys know what's going on.

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<v Speaker 10>Good morning. I just wanted to come. This was the

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<v Speaker 10>first year that I did the elf sing for my kids.

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<v Speaker 10>I never wanted to be a part of it, but

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<v Speaker 10>my daughter is at that age where she's going to

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<v Speaker 10>get older. I'm like, let's just do it one year.

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<v Speaker 10>I will never do it again because of my animals,

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<v Speaker 10>not because of the mischief, not because of the alves.

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<v Speaker 10>Literally the first day that I did it, I did

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<v Speaker 10>the one where he was hanging from the balloon. My

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<v Speaker 10>son's cat was jumping mid air attacking it. It got

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<v Speaker 10>on the ground. My golden doodle thought it was his baby,

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<v Speaker 10>grabbed it. I had to cheese him around the house.

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<v Speaker 10>It was like a nightmare. I even have pictures every

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<v Speaker 10>day when I set it up. My son's cat is

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<v Speaker 10>like just there, like he thinks he's a part of it.

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<v Speaker 7>He loved it.

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<v Speaker 1>Like it used to be that your animals hated Christmas trees.

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<v Speaker 4>Now they hate the elves, the alf.

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<v Speaker 10>And it's the animals. I'm like, I can't every day

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<v Speaker 10>I'm like struggling because they're trying to get this alf.

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<v Speaker 10>I'm like, I'm done.

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<v Speaker 4>I get it. And by the way, you didn't do anything.

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<v Speaker 4>The elf did it?

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<v Speaker 10>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 11>They and that elf may decide not to come back

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<v Speaker 11>to your home next year, which so sad, which would

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<v Speaker 11>be very sad, But you know what, sometimes that elf

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<v Speaker 11>needs to go to a home that needs And what's

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<v Speaker 11>going on, Katie?

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<v Speaker 4>My elf he ate my elf had off? Wait wait,

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<v Speaker 4>hold on your elf?

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<v Speaker 6>My dog?

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<v Speaker 7>Your dog ate my dog ate my elf? Hat on?

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<v Speaker 4>No, so so you have an elf without a hat?

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<v Speaker 6>Yeah, well I got it back from the dog, did you?

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<v Speaker 4>Katie? Katie?

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<v Speaker 1>Who a you in the car with? Or wait, you're

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<v Speaker 1>not not Katie. You're Ellie, aren't you? You're Ellie Katie's

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<v Speaker 1>mom with daughter Ellie. How old are you Ellie nine?

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<v Speaker 1>How did you get the hat bag? Did the dog

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<v Speaker 1>have to poop it out.

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<v Speaker 10>No, how I grab it out of his mouth?

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my gosh, dangerous. And what's your what's the naughty

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<v Speaker 1>dog's name?

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<v Speaker 6>Matt? What's your house?

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<v Speaker 7>We have a grinch elf?

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<v Speaker 8>W what's his name?

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<v Speaker 2>The Grinch?

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<v Speaker 7>We have the elk the dog?

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<v Speaker 1>Wait, what's the other elf?

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<v Speaker 10>Name is Candy? Kim? We have two elf pets.

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<v Speaker 3>The dog is Blizzard in the elf pets and then

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<v Speaker 3>the elk foxes gun drop.

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<v Speaker 4>Well, you got to protect the elf.

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<v Speaker 1>You got to make sure that the elf stays up

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<v Speaker 1>so that nobody can get to it. Okay, make sure

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<v Speaker 1>Mommy does that for you. Thank you Katie for calling in.

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<v Speaker 2>Merry Christmas, Katy, Mery Christmas.

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<v Speaker 4>Really take care, guys. What's going on? How you doing? Kevin?

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<v Speaker 7>Good?

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<v Speaker 6>My elf?

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<v Speaker 7>Uh?

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<v Speaker 6>So?

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<v Speaker 7>I took him for he'd liked to ride in the

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<v Speaker 7>front of my dunk tuck on the grill in the winter.

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<v Speaker 7>We were going to the es Curve in the winter time.

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<v Speaker 7>Somebody lost the metal garbage can in the poor elf

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<v Speaker 7>got Kevin.

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<v Speaker 4>Kevin, you are a bastard. By the way.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know those kids that are traumatized when they

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<v Speaker 1>see an elf on your front grille?

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<v Speaker 4>Thinking that you hit the elf. What an evil man?

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<v Speaker 7>He wanted to cool down.

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<v Speaker 1>Why does it not surprise me that Kevin's got his

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<v Speaker 1>own elf? What's going on?

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<v Speaker 5>Debby?

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<v Speaker 6>Hey, good morning morning. We bought one of them. We

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<v Speaker 6>bought one of those knockoff elves and my kid named

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<v Speaker 6>it ELPs. He's a big Elvis pan and we lost it,

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<v Speaker 6>so we had to and I looked everywhere to get

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<v Speaker 6>one that looked just like him, and I couldn't find it.

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<v Speaker 6>So we got to replacement elf and we told him

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<v Speaker 6>it was a substitute elf, like the substitute teacher.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't think.

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<v Speaker 6>I don't think he bought an He was skeptical the last.

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<v Speaker 4>Year, Vin, Debby, where do you get knockoff elves? At you? Amazon?

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<v Speaker 8>It was fine?

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<v Speaker 6>I think it was five below.

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<v Speaker 4>Debbie, Debbie, Yeah, go blow your nose? Is it? Sonet?

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<v Speaker 5>Yes?

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<v Speaker 9>Good Morning's right next the dancing press.

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<v Speaker 2>That don't pay attention to him?

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<v Speaker 6>Okay, Yeah, so I have the best elf on the

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<v Speaker 6>shelf story.

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<v Speaker 10>We had Engelbert and we couldn't figure out where.

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<v Speaker 6>To put him, so we my husband threw him up

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<v Speaker 6>in the light picture and once he was up there,

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<v Speaker 6>his legs hit the light bulb.

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<v Speaker 8>We started smelling this burning.

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<v Speaker 6>Elf has caught on fire his kitchen tongs and then

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<v Speaker 6>wrapped his.

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<v Speaker 10>Legs for emergency surgery so that he had a.

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<v Speaker 6>Cat for suggle.

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<v Speaker 1>That's crazy, So on it what a funny story. Hold on,

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<v Speaker 1>last call, Candy, what's up Candy?

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<v Speaker 8>Hi, longtime listener, first time calling on the phone.

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<v Speaker 1>By the way, Candy, are you a human or are

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<v Speaker 1>you an elf? Are we talking to the actual elf

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<v Speaker 1>calling us.

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<v Speaker 4>Up right now?

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<v Speaker 10>Well?

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<v Speaker 8>I mean I'm about the size of an elf, but

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<v Speaker 8>I am human.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, what's going on?

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<v Speaker 10>Okay?

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<v Speaker 8>So I have quite a few children. I collect them,

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<v Speaker 8>you know, like Pokemon cards, so we have. I thought

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<v Speaker 8>the one year would be really cute to put our

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<v Speaker 8>elf in the shower, like on the little shelves, you know,

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<v Speaker 8>and put soap and stuff and put him in there

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<v Speaker 8>like he has taken a shower. And my kids went

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<v Speaker 8>in there and they refused to They were scared to

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<v Speaker 8>go in the bathroom and refuse to use it because

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<v Speaker 8>they said our ouse was a pervert.

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<v Speaker 4>That's funny. Why is the elf taking a shower with

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<v Speaker 4>little kids? By the way, That, by the way, is

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<v Speaker 4>going to be one of those Smart.

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<v Speaker 1>That's going to be a story. There's going to be

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<v Speaker 1>an expose on the local news stations. Parents, watch out,

0:12:13.720 --> 0:12:17.679
<v Speaker 1>there's an elf in showers here. Thank you, Candy. You

0:12:17.720 --> 0:12:18.560
<v Speaker 1>have a great day.

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<v Speaker 4>Merry Christmas.