Speaker 1: Do you want to be an American at the fog
Speaker 1: dead slash President's Dad? Good Marti Scott's loan back on
Speaker 1: seven hundred WWD to driving. Yeah, that FOG's no joke
Speaker 1: this morning. There's there's still a fog out there. Obviously,
Speaker 1: I don't think it's gonna burn off till like ten eleven,
Speaker 1: twelve o'clock today. For sure makes sense with the warm
Speaker 1: weather moving and all that snow and ice and rain,
Speaker 1: O the grap you know what the moisture is what's
Speaker 1: causing this? Obviously definitely two hands on the wheel and
Speaker 1: turn the fog lights on if you have them. So,
Speaker 1: if you are in the under the age of fifty,
Speaker 1: in that cohort sub fifty, you are seeing an eighty
Speaker 1: percent increase over the last thirty years of cancers, in
Speaker 1: particular digestive cancers. You're twice as likely to have colon cancer,
Speaker 1: four times more cases of rectal cancer than people born
Speaker 1: in nineteen fifty. That's unreal. What's driving this is the question?
Speaker 1: He is Randy Drusik, He's the president of eh C
Speaker 1: and Kenwood.
Speaker 2: Good morning. How are you?
Speaker 1: Those are all seeing rapid increases as well as a
Speaker 1: matter of fact, today, in twenty twenty five, young adults
Speaker 1: are twice as likely to be diagnosed with colon cancer
Speaker 1: and four times more likely to be diagnosed with rectal
Speaker 1: cancer as those born in nineteen fifty. What the hell
Speaker 1: is driving this trend? And how do we fix it?
Speaker 1: Randy Drosick is the president of HC here in Kenwood.
Speaker 1: Doctor DROSSI, good morning.
Speaker 2: How are you?
Speaker 3: I'm fine, Thank you and thanks for having me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Weird paradox here, we're getting better at finding and treating
Speaker 1: cancer as much earlier than ever before. But why then
Speaker 1: are people developing cancers younger than ever before? Or is
Speaker 1: it because that we are discovering them at an early
Speaker 1: age because of that treatment? It's kind of like a
Speaker 1: self fulfilling prophecy here.
Speaker 3: That's good. We don't really know why people are being
Speaker 3: diagnosed younger, but that we definitely have a trend in colon, breath,
Speaker 3: cervical and a few other cancers that we are seeing
Speaker 3: this it's being studied. We're concentrating. We've been concentrating for
Speaker 3: detection so long. This isn't something that we've we've been
Speaker 3: working at very long.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Or are we just catching it earlier.
Speaker 1: I guess it's the point, you know, the cancers that
Speaker 1: we wouldn't see develop and maybe slow moving cancers that
Speaker 1: would develop over the course of a few years, we're
Speaker 1: catching so much sooner now, and therefore it seems like, Okay,
Speaker 1: we are getting maybe we always had it, but is
Speaker 1: there evidence that that's the case.
Speaker 3: That may be part of the case. The other thing
Speaker 3: is we are better at genetics, so we do scream,
Speaker 3: like you said. But the interesting thing the cancers that
Speaker 3: we see in these people who are under fifty tend
Speaker 3: to be much more aggressive than the cancers that we
Speaker 3: see and people who are over fifty.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, oh paradox is that it is a paradox.
Speaker 1: But as I looked at these numbers, what jumps off
Speaker 1: the page to me is there's like fourteen cancer types
Speaker 1: that were screened in the study that did. Eight of
Speaker 1: them are digestive based, right, So it's it's upper lower, GI, stomach, throat, esophagel,
Speaker 1: all that stuff. And does that tell you maybe it's nutrition, diet,
Speaker 1: that kind of thing.
Speaker 3: I think you're absolutely correct. I think it's our seventh
Speaker 3: a lifestyle and you know, we have a lot of
Speaker 3: obesity in this country, smoking, heavy alcohol, use a lot
Speaker 3: of processed foods. I think all those contribute to GI cancers.
Speaker 1: How much do you attribute this to the to the
Speaker 1: diet because smoking numbers have declined for a long time.
Speaker 1: But I look at that and go although I should say,
Speaker 1: before the diet thing, let's talk about smoking.
Speaker 2: Vaping is a thing. Now do you think there's a
Speaker 2: tie there? And now there's no.
Speaker 1: I don't know if there's any scientific data to back
Speaker 1: that up, but smoking vaping is there something there?
Speaker 3: I think vaping is definitely not good for you, and
Speaker 3: I think you're you. Also, it's the nail on the
Speaker 3: head again that diet. Our diet in the US is
Speaker 3: just not very good. We're a fast food country.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we still are, right despite an effort to try
Speaker 1: and need better. I know in my advanced stage that
Speaker 1: I am trying to do the best I can. Doesn't
Speaker 1: mean that I don't enjoy pizza or you know, burger
Speaker 1: and fries or something like that, but not not every day.
Speaker 1: And people hear that moderation, moderation, But physicians like yourself
Speaker 1: have been preaching that for a long time. Why do
Speaker 1: we tune that out?
Speaker 3: I think Americans tend to work longer hours than other countries.
Speaker 3: When you look at the number of hours the American
Speaker 3: worker works compared to other countries, I think our free
Speaker 3: time is left and I think we try to cram
Speaker 3: as much into a day as we can.
Speaker 1: I think that's an interesting analysis. I mean, if you've
Speaker 1: ever been overseas, for example, you go to Europe Italy,
Speaker 1: I've been to a few times, and it's just a
Speaker 1: whole different thing over the UK. Maybe pretty similar to
Speaker 1: us here, but you know, you go there, things shut
Speaker 1: down for a couple hours in the afternoon.
Speaker 2: You want a cup of coffee.
Speaker 1: If there's no drive through there, you got to sit
Speaker 1: down and enjoy your coffee, and you come back in
Speaker 1: a super chill and I think there's something to be
Speaker 1: said about that.
Speaker 3: I definitely think we're working ourselves into bad health.
Speaker 2: But we have for a long time.
Speaker 1: Maybe the generations figured out because you hear about, wow,
Speaker 1: the work ethic of these young people. They just want
Speaker 1: to go on vacation, and maybe there's maybe they're going
Speaker 1: to live longer as a result of that as opposed
Speaker 1: to what we were doing.
Speaker 3: Well, they may that's that's for sure. We tend not
Speaker 3: to exercise as much as other countries. I think that
Speaker 3: plays a huge role in it also.
Speaker 1: And I think the older you get, the more sedentary
Speaker 1: you are too. But you know, we're talking about cancer
Speaker 1: and young people. What is it specifically about our diet
Speaker 1: Western diet? Is it the saturated fad? Is the processed
Speaker 1: nature of foods? As a physician, doctor do I said,
Speaker 1: can you finger? Can you point the finger at any
Speaker 1: one thing? Or is it all those things?
Speaker 3: I think it's I think it's everything. I think high
Speaker 3: fat diet definitely plays into it. Processed foods play into it,
Speaker 3: high sugar content. You know, with we see processed foods
Speaker 3: and snacks, you're you're probably better off eating a carrot
Speaker 3: for a snack than the back of chips.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but between me and you, the chips are so
Speaker 2: much better.
Speaker 3: You know, particularly if you have French onion dip.
Speaker 2: It's hard to argue with with.
Speaker 3: Fresh onion dip and chips, I agree.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But it can't be every day.
Speaker 1: It has to be you know, I know people my
Speaker 1: age that are you're probably having a bag of chips
Speaker 1: a day, or a six pack of beer or twelve
Speaker 1: pack as the case may be. And I mean that's
Speaker 1: all well and good if you've don't plan on living long,
Speaker 1: But that's the unfortunate part of this thing. How much
Speaker 1: is alcohol use playing into this? Especially for people under
Speaker 1: the age of fifty are developing cancer.
Speaker 3: Heavy alcohol use, particularly as the sophageal cancer and the
Speaker 3: savageal cancer. Alcohol and smoking together is a very lethal combination.
Speaker 3: So we definitely see that not only that. You know,
Speaker 3: you get cerasus delivery, you get centripletal obesity. All those
Speaker 3: things contribute to poor health. But the key is what
Speaker 3: you said earlier, moderation moderation.
Speaker 1: Do you think that sleep deprivation, poor sleep quality factors
Speaker 1: into this too? And that you mentioned we're going and
Speaker 1: going and going all the time. Most of us are
Speaker 1: not getting as many hours as we need. Most I
Speaker 1: think the average American has lessened seven hours of sleep.
Speaker 1: Now is that a factor? Hear that your body doesn't
Speaker 1: have time to repair those hells?
Speaker 3: Well, again, you're corrected. I don't know if it has
Speaker 3: as much effect with cancer, but it certainly does with
Speaker 3: our overall health, not just that, but our mental health
Speaker 3: and risk of Alzheimer's. You know, when our brain just
Speaker 3: needs to decompress, just like an athlete's body needs to decompressed.
Speaker 1: It's like, because you know you work out, Let's say
Speaker 1: you lift weight, so we got to take a day
Speaker 1: off before you do anything else because you're sore and
Speaker 1: your muscles have to in order to grow your muscles,
Speaker 1: you have to rest. That's part of it. Another paradox
Speaker 1: here sounds like you're saying the same thing with this.
Speaker 3: Absolutely yeah, your brain needs to be worked, your brain
Speaker 3: needs to be relaxed, and finding that balance is very difficult.
Speaker 1: And we don't like that right the whole olm yoga right,
Speaker 1: take a calm time relaxation technique. I got an iPhone
Speaker 1: that nags me like a like a second wife about
Speaker 1: you know, stand up, sit down, do this, do that.
Speaker 1: It's like we just turned that stuff off and we
Speaker 1: just want to plow through it. And especially men, we
Speaker 1: just want to plow through that wall. We'll just keep
Speaker 1: going on we fall over.
Speaker 3: Oh, I agree. I have a bad habit of that. Also,
Speaker 3: I did hot yoga for a year or two prior
Speaker 3: of the pandemic, and I can tell you you want
Speaker 3: to talk about something that will let your brain decompress.
Speaker 3: It's unbelievable and I'm sorry they haven't gone back to it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I tried it actually before I back surgery
Speaker 1: years ago, and I just I can't do the yoga thing.
Speaker 2: It's too much of me. I can't spend that much
Speaker 2: time with myself.
Speaker 3: Doctor.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm not a fan. I'm not a fan of me.
Speaker 1: I'll be honest with you. I got, like, you know what,
Speaker 1: enough of this stuff I got me and with my
Speaker 1: voices in my head by myself, it's a it's not
Speaker 1: a good combination.
Speaker 2: I just I got to get away from me sometimes.
Speaker 3: But you know, you have to stay active. I always
Speaker 3: tell people, once you sit, you stay seated. And I'm
Speaker 3: sixty four and I ran the pig this past year.
Speaker 3: Good and you just have to keep doing that. If
Speaker 3: you're I should say age properly about that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I uh, well you're a you're a freak then,
Speaker 1: because I'm thinking man running it that uh. And I'm
Speaker 1: younger than you are. Although I still box, I might
Speaker 1: have to give that up because I got you know,
Speaker 1: ostri arthritis, and everything hurts now. But I'll find something
Speaker 1: else to do, uh, in order to keep active. And
Speaker 1: it's good for your brain, it's good for your body.
Speaker 1: We're talking to doctor Randy Drusick this morning. He's an ecologist.
Speaker 1: He's also a president of OHC cancer specialists all all over.
Speaker 1: The one here in Kenwood is fantastic, by the way,
Speaker 1: firsthand experience there. They are the cancer specialists in Cincinnati
Speaker 1: talking about a weird paradox here. We're getting better at
Speaker 1: finding and treating cancers, but we are seeing cancer developed
Speaker 1: earlier than ever before. Kate Middleton, Princess of Wales, Hamlin
Speaker 1: County Auditor, Bridget Kelly. There's Chadwick Boseman, of course, James
Speaker 1: Vanderbeek from Dawson's Creek who just died days ago.
Speaker 4: How much of this?
Speaker 5: You know?
Speaker 1: I mentioned the diet element of this thing too, and
Speaker 1: then I started thinking about you know, I just mentioned
Speaker 1: when I had surgery and I had seed iff and
Speaker 1: it's a gut back.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 1: We don't think about our back here and our gut
Speaker 1: until things go really, really south.
Speaker 2: Is that also part of this too?
Speaker 1: We're eating the processed foods and alcohol and smoking and
Speaker 1: lack of exercise, probably over prescribed antibiotics and stuff like
Speaker 1: that have a factor in your gut health.
Speaker 2: How important is that? With cancer?
Speaker 3: Sure, your gut has natural bacteria in it, and if
Speaker 3: we disrupt that mail you you can have all kinds
Speaker 3: of problems. You can have an infection called clustered and different. Still,
Speaker 3: there are certain types of astro intestinal cancers that we
Speaker 3: know are related to Helico factor, So yes, there are,
Speaker 3: and you can actually treat those cancers by treating the
Speaker 3: Helico factors. So bacteria certainly can play a role, and
Speaker 3: so conviruses.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and so you're yeah, does HPV for women fit
Speaker 1: in this too?
Speaker 3: Yes, yeah, it definitely does. They plays a very big
Speaker 3: role in cervical cancer and now we're seeing it in
Speaker 3: some aill cancers also.
Speaker 1: Right right right, I think, and it all fits together
Speaker 1: that the the the bacteria in the gut, and it
Speaker 1: sounds kind of like new agy, but uh, you know,
Speaker 1: stuff like yogurt and kafir and anything like that that's
Speaker 1: a probiotic that you can consume is definitely gonna help
Speaker 1: help move the needle for you, especially if you maybe
Speaker 1: you are cutting corners when it comes to diet exercise.
Speaker 3: I agree, and I think we don't know exactly why,
Speaker 3: but it may have to do with what we call
Speaker 3: transit time. If you have a bowel movement every day,
Speaker 3: all the bad stuff gets out of your gut. If
Speaker 3: there's someone that has an every five or six day
Speaker 3: or what we would a lot of people would consider constipation,
Speaker 3: you're more exposed to those toxins in your gut, and
Speaker 3: there's a question whether that may increase your risk of
Speaker 3: these GI cancers.
Speaker 1: Is that metabolism though? Can you change that? But the
Speaker 1: way your body metabolizes.
Speaker 3: I think you can with with high fiber diets. I
Speaker 3: think there's a lot of things you can do to
Speaker 3: increase increase your time.
Speaker 1: More veggie and more exercise. And it makes stuff, uh,
Speaker 1: it makes stuff move three If that makes sense, I
Speaker 1: mean if it hangs around, it takes a chance to
Speaker 1: you know, essentially just sit there. And there's a reason
Speaker 1: why your body's getting rid of it. I guess that
Speaker 1: makes sense. You can take the garbage outlet's put that way.
Speaker 1: Why not be too too messy here? Yeah, And we're
Speaker 1: seeing this alarming trend. Now, how concerned are you as
Speaker 1: a as a oncologist doctor drawsick that we're seeing these
Speaker 1: numbers and people getting cancer earlier and earlier than ever before.
Speaker 2: How bad is it really?
Speaker 3: From your perspective, it's devastating because the cancers are much worse.
Speaker 3: If you take a colon cancer and a forty year
Speaker 3: old for colon cancer and a seventy year old, the
Speaker 3: prognosis is much worse. The stage tends to be picked
Speaker 3: up a little bit later, you know, because we don't
Speaker 3: really screen for colon cancer unless you have a non
Speaker 3: genetic risk until you're forty five. So you take a
Speaker 3: thirty five year old, it's not expected. You're not screening.
Speaker 3: It tends to be later, tends to be more aggressive,
Speaker 3: they don't respond as well as treatment, and some of
Speaker 3: the markers of this tend to be the genetic markers,
Speaker 3: both from the family genetics and the genetics. The tumor
Speaker 3: tend to be different and.
Speaker 2: It's just some more aggressive therefore harder to treat.
Speaker 3: Absolutely.
Speaker 1: Yeah, when it comes to cancers that you see, which
Speaker 1: is the I guess you know, we talk about lymphatic cancer,
Speaker 1: which my mom had, but there's you know, there's a
Speaker 1: host of ones that are like that. We just have
Speaker 1: the treatment for that. The ones that you're seeing that
Speaker 1: are just not survivable or we're not there yet as
Speaker 1: first treatment goes.
Speaker 3: Or what I think the young, well, I think We've
Speaker 3: made headway in every cancer and I'm an optimist because
Speaker 3: I'm an oncologist, but I think if the ones that
Speaker 3: I see that I find to be devastating is our
Speaker 3: younger patients with colon cancer and one that's it's on
Speaker 3: the rise one to two percent per year, they don't
Speaker 3: respond quite as well, and to me, that is a
Speaker 3: very heartbreaking when you see it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're seeing a rise in colorectal cancer, which is
Speaker 1: normally something you would see in middle age or beyond,
Speaker 1: and now we're seeing in patients, as you said, as
Speaker 1: young as forty and certainly under fifty.
Speaker 3: Now that's yeah, that's exactly correct.
Speaker 2: That's horrible.
Speaker 1: I saw something else too recently, and it's called the
Speaker 1: birth cohort effect, in that each group of people born
Speaker 1: at a later time, let's say ten years apart, had
Speaker 1: a higher risk of delphing cancer and life. We're seeing
Speaker 1: that trend now that it should be going the other way,
Speaker 1: but it's the exact opposite.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's alarming. In our survival rates for some of
Speaker 3: these cancers, particularly like breast cancer, have gotten better, and
Speaker 3: I think some of that's due to early detection, but
Speaker 3: you do wonder whether this curve is going to slide
Speaker 3: back the other way now that we're seeing it in
Speaker 3: younger people.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean prostate cancer for example. Right now we're
Speaker 1: not doing the you know, post COVID, not doing the
Speaker 1: exam anymore, thank god. And it's blood works, it's a
Speaker 1: fecal study, stuff like that. So I mean that technology
Speaker 1: is amazing.
Speaker 3: Yes it is. And one thing is when you're brought
Speaker 3: about COVID. We have a thing here at OAC and
Speaker 3: we tried to preach this to the hospital. Cancer is
Speaker 3: not going to stop because there's a virus and a pandemic.
Speaker 3: Don't stop your screening, don't stop your mammograms, don't stop
Speaker 3: your colonostrophies, don't stop your your yearly cascans of the
Speaker 3: chest for smokers because there's a pandemic. Because this is
Speaker 3: going to catch up to us later when they're diagnosed.
Speaker 3: These patients are diagnosed at a later stage.
Speaker 1: Yeah, No one likes to go and have that prostrate
Speaker 1: screening if you're a guy, or have your colonoscopy done
Speaker 1: to check. But you know, I've known people before that
Speaker 1: have said, man, I wish I would have because they're
Speaker 1: they're now gone and they died way too young because
Speaker 1: they never did that that work, and it's uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: Who likes to go and.
Speaker 1: And I'm sure it's not pleasant for the physician either,
Speaker 1: but it's something you have to go and do and
Speaker 1: it's it's not it's uncomfortable and no one likes to
Speaker 1: do it, but the end result is catastrophic because you're living,
Speaker 1: your family and a lot of life left.
Speaker 2: Again, it's doctor Andy Drossick. He is the president.
Speaker 1: He's an oncologist at o HC Cancer Specialists and Columbus
Speaker 1: and ken Wooden across the state as well. Doctor Drusik,
Speaker 1: thanks so much for taking time out and you're really busy,
Speaker 1: but appreciate the information this morning.
Speaker 3: And thank you for having me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, certainly the best awareness campaign we have for this
Speaker 1: are young people getting cancer and dying. And I don't
Speaker 1: think you'll mentally we put it together because James Vanderbeek
Speaker 1: I mentioned, just died at what forty eight, And there's
Speaker 1: a pretty consistent pattern of people under the age of
Speaker 1: fifty getting and dying from cancers because you don't expect.
Speaker 1: There was a nineteen year old, nineteen year old Miranda McKeon,
Speaker 1: I think her name was and with a ny she's
Speaker 1: an actress, had stage three breast cancer and that's that's
Speaker 1: extremely young, right twenty two. Lea died at twenty two
Speaker 1: Dustin Diamond members saved by the bell. I think he
Speaker 1: was in his early forties from carsonoma. And it just
Speaker 1: it's a steady drug me to this. We just wanted
Speaker 1: to go, wow, there's there's a trend going on here.
Speaker 1: When you do that, though, you're you're surprised, I think,
Speaker 1: and if you're younger, you also think that we all
Speaker 1: were at some point infallible that we can eat and
Speaker 1: drink and do whatever we want.
Speaker 2: We're good.
Speaker 1: Well apparently not because whatever it is and somewhere in
Speaker 1: our environment and maybe also in our DNA, we don't
Speaker 1: know these things are coming together with catstrok results.
Speaker 2: You know, when you see.
Speaker 1: The cancer rates go up eighty percent over the last
Speaker 1: forty years, there's certainly something in the water and in
Speaker 1: the food and maybe within us as well. So you know,
Speaker 1: the best thing you can do is go get those screenings.
Speaker 1: At a time as we debate healthcare and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: look at Congress shutting down again and certainly not for
Speaker 1: health care, but you know, the one before this was
Speaker 1: that people are pinching pennies and going lo I really
Speaker 1: can't afford this. And if you don't have health care,
Speaker 1: you're not going to go get the screenings, and you
Speaker 1: may wind up becoming a casualty, becoming a statistic I
Speaker 1: think the healthcare system is somewhat negligent in this as
Speaker 1: well too. Yeah, we got to engage in care. And
Speaker 1: if you're fortunate to have the care, you still have
Speaker 1: to go. I know people who have insurance don't go
Speaker 1: to the doctor and all the less they're sick. That's
Speaker 1: a mistake. Especially used to be like over the age
Speaker 1: of forty you got to go once a year at least.
Speaker 1: Hell now it seems like at twenty you should be
Speaker 1: going once or twice a year, if indeed you have
Speaker 1: the insurance, which is another big part of the problem.
Speaker 1: Let me do a news update here. We still have
Speaker 1: pretty heavy pockets of a fog. We'll find out when
Speaker 1: that burns off. And no more Scott'sland on this President's
Speaker 1: Day twenty twenty six, seven hundred ww sure fog yee
Speaker 1: had them fog lights on today?
Speaker 2: They pay dividends. May I got the snow meltain.
Speaker 1: You got the ground saturation, you get the warmer temperatures,
Speaker 1: and uh, you know when you get up to it's
Speaker 1: thirty six already, we're going up to what fifty five
Speaker 1: today roughly, and it's a nice day, and certainly it
Speaker 1: looks like we're not going to see freezing temperatures. I
Speaker 1: may save at night, obviously, but during the day for
Speaker 1: a long long time, hopefully not till next year or
Speaker 1: at least the fall. Anyway, Scott flowing here seven hundred
Speaker 1: ww on this President's Day, twenty twenty six, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I had a lot of people had the day off.
Speaker 1: I you know, people here have the day off. I
Speaker 1: decided it works himply because I maybe it's a internal
Speaker 1: protests against our government, right, they've shut government down. But now, okay,
Speaker 1: now we've got to go out a little vacation. We
Speaker 1: need a break. We've been we've been so busy not
Speaker 1: doing anything we need. Do you know how exhausting getting
Speaker 1: paid not to do your job is. It's so tiring.
Speaker 1: We need a sabbatical. We need a reset, all right.
Speaker 1: You can't really make you can't make this stuff your
Speaker 1: early laugh or cry you laugh or cry One of
Speaker 1: the fascinatings coming out and maybe there is hope at
Speaker 1: this point with Savannah Gus Guthrie's mom Nancy, now in
Speaker 1: its second week, is they found a black glove on
Speaker 1: I think Friday. So if you watch it, and I'm
Speaker 1: sure you've seen the camera video, which we'll get to
Speaker 1: in a second, but you saw someone who's clearly wearing
Speaker 1: a a latex or a vinyl glove on their hand,
Speaker 1: and about a mile and a half away. And here's
Speaker 1: how exhaustive the search is. About on a road a
Speaker 1: mile and a half away from the house, they found
Speaker 1: on thee to her road, hanging off of looked like
Speaker 1: a little tiny kectus a black vinyl glove and they
Speaker 1: recovered that and found d n A evidence and it
Speaker 1: appears to match the gloves of the subject and the
Speaker 1: surveillance video and so we don't know if it's actually
Speaker 1: that it's you know, could have been in the trash.
Speaker 2: We don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean that mile and a half away is pretty good,
Speaker 1: and it feels like, Wow, they're leaving no stone unturned.
Speaker 1: But now we're in our second week and Savannah Guthrie
Speaker 1: has released he had another video and that poor woman
Speaker 1: is just absolutely I feel so bad for her in
Speaker 1: the family obviously, I think we all do. But you
Speaker 1: just see the anguish on her face, like she seems
Speaker 1: like a real good person and that's everyone who's around
Speaker 1: her says that. But she's not contemplating maybe never returning
Speaker 1: to work to the day show because she feels responsible
Speaker 1: to some degree for her mom's dis appearance, because, as
Speaker 1: typical when it comes to morning shows, and in this
Speaker 1: case Network morning shows, she used her mom for material.
Speaker 1: You know, her mom became featured several times on the show.
Speaker 1: At one point they actually had a meal inside her house.
Speaker 1: They saw the inside of her home in Tucson. And
Speaker 1: now she's gone. And this poor woman is just beside herself,
Speaker 1: beating herself up that she essentially caused the disappearance of
Speaker 1: her mom and maybe the death or I mean, can
Speaker 1: you imagine. It's just it's so heartbreaking. You kind of
Speaker 1: want to tell her, Look, it's not your fault. You
Speaker 1: did the best you think you could do. You know,
Speaker 1: you just don't you don't think there's sick and twisted
Speaker 1: people in the world, and clearly they are. And so
Speaker 1: now FBI continues their search. The scary part about this
Speaker 1: for me is you think about this. Okay, we're not
Speaker 1: in our second week. Something is going to happen this
Speaker 1: week that has nothing to do with the Nancy Guthrie case.
Speaker 1: And as Savannah Guthrie knows, and that's why maybe she's
Speaker 1: releasing more videos, it will start to fade from the
Speaker 1: public conscience. This is the this is the week where
Speaker 1: something in the news will happen. Something will happen in
Speaker 1: the next couple of weeks, and this will become second
Speaker 1: page news because we only as consumers, as meeting consumers,
Speaker 1: only have the conscience. We only have the ability to
Speaker 1: really balance one big story at a time. And that's
Speaker 1: pretty common. It's always been that way. And Savannah Guthrie
Speaker 1: knows this that something's going to occur to overthrow this
Speaker 1: in the news cycle, to take over, and this will
Speaker 1: become a bottom line story. And if that's the case,
Speaker 1: then what happens is you don't have as many people
Speaker 1: engage in the story, and therefore the chances of finding
Speaker 1: the person responsible, person's responsible diminishes because no one's paying
Speaker 1: attention to anymore. It'll become one of those she's still missing.
Speaker 1: It'll just kind of fade away, which is it's horrible,
Speaker 1: it's sad, and I feel badly for them, but it's
Speaker 1: just the way it's always worked. And I think Samana
Speaker 1: Guthrie is smart. She knows this, and so as soon
Speaker 1: as a big story comes out in the news, that's it.
Speaker 1: And even you know, I'm sure NBC will continue to
Speaker 1: follow this the Today Show because it's on to their own,
Speaker 1: but you know, other news agencies and I think just
Speaker 1: when it comes to social media and like we'll move
Speaker 1: on sadly. It's just kind of how we are. I
Speaker 1: think it's all sime. We have somebody on maybe tomorrow Wednesday.
Speaker 1: Regarding the cameras themselves. So in America we all have
Speaker 1: you know, we have more cameras who know what to
Speaker 1: do with you may be I'm not using that stuff
Speaker 1: at all. I mean that may be you, but you
Speaker 1: still have stuff with cameras on them. And in that relationship,
Speaker 1: are you concerned more about security or the surveillance date?
Speaker 1: And because I don't think you can really balance them both,
Speaker 1: I think you got to make a decision. So something
Speaker 1: like one in five homes in America now have a
Speaker 1: video door belt, there's nests, there's ring, and they made
Speaker 1: big newsies past weeks Nancy Guthrie case and that Kesh
Speaker 1: Pattel came out and said, well, yeah, she didn't pay
Speaker 1: for the count and they let the subscription laps because
Speaker 1: it goes to the cloud. You pay that there's residual
Speaker 1: data located in back end systems. I have no idea
Speaker 1: what that statement meant other than the fact that we'll
Speaker 1: hold on just a second. Even though you're not subscribing,
Speaker 1: it's still recording and uploading to the cloud. Is that
Speaker 1: what you're saying. And then to unlock that material you
Speaker 1: need you need to pay the subscription, which a lot
Speaker 1: of people go, what am I paying this for? Well,
Speaker 1: if you think about it, there's what twenty million households
Speaker 1: that have these things. That's a lot of disk space
Speaker 1: and you got to pay for your storage.
Speaker 2: That's what it is.
Speaker 1: And the people to monitor this stuff and they got
Speaker 1: to make a profit. That's where these subscription fees goes.
Speaker 1: It's out there in the ether. I'm a cloud somewhere
Speaker 1: and when you hear this, you go, wow, that may
Speaker 1: help catch the killer or you go, whoa on just
Speaker 1: a second, am I always under surveillance and the question
Speaker 1: is yes. So the super Bowl ad came out and
Speaker 1: you may recall her, maybe not the one that Ring did,
Speaker 1: and initially in your drunken super Bowl state and maybe
Speaker 1: drunk from alcohol, but probably from food, your food drunk.
Speaker 1: You watch that ad and want, oh, that's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: My dog is missing. And the Ring cameras create this network.
Speaker 1: So everyone who has the Ring branded camera uses some
Speaker 1: of your band with them and your WiFi to share
Speaker 1: the data and information. And so now we have facial
Speaker 1: recognition technology. The same company that developed license plates or
Speaker 1: readers for police departments and facial recognition technology for airports
Speaker 1: and public places. You can now get that as predicted.
Speaker 1: Now get that in your home product and your Ring
Speaker 1: door belt, and so we can see your Hey, there's
Speaker 1: your dog.
Speaker 2: Your dog's missing.
Speaker 1: You upload a couple of photos your dog, and the
Speaker 1: flock system, the proprietary software, is able to create a
Speaker 1: facial recognition thumbprint of the dog and go, hey, there's
Speaker 1: a okay, is it an Irish setter? Is it the Dashian?
Speaker 1: What do you got? A mutt with a curly tail,
Speaker 1: no tail, whatever it might be, And they are able
Speaker 1: to go, oh, it's a few blocks over we got
Speaker 1: to hit on this house up the street. That's where
Speaker 1: your dog might be. Go check that neighbor, Go check
Speaker 1: that street, which is watch anyone? Oh, that's really cool.
Speaker 1: I have a dog. I've dog, maybe McCAT I might
Speaker 1: have a And then enough people want hold on just
Speaker 1: a second. If you can do that with a dog,
Speaker 1: you certainly can do that with someone's face. And we
Speaker 1: actually have had that technology for some time. I know
Speaker 1: there's like my cue, which I think is a Chamberlain product.
Speaker 1: Garage door openers has that feature on it that you
Speaker 1: can activate it and if someone comes to your camera
Speaker 1: in front of your camera near your garage door maybe
Speaker 1: I don't knowin the Amazon guy whatever it is, they
Speaker 1: will recognize that person's face going oh hey, or maybe
Speaker 1: you're you know, maybe a relative came over. You know,
Speaker 1: cousin Bob was dropping by, and you got his face
Speaker 1: in there, you would tag You'd look at the video
Speaker 1: and go, okay, that's cousin Bob, and then you'd put
Speaker 1: that in there and the software would go, okay, every
Speaker 1: time we see this face, the attachment is cousin Bob.
Speaker 1: It lets you know cousin Bob was stopping by your
Speaker 1: house or grandm or grandpa, mom, dad, kids, whomever, which
Speaker 1: I think is pretty cool. And the same way now,
Speaker 1: I mean even ring an extension of that is it
Speaker 1: recognizes if there's a package at your front door. Now,
Speaker 1: so it doesn't say hey, motion at the front door goes, oh,
Speaker 1: a package has been dropped to your front door, because
Speaker 1: it sees a person carrying a box or a package
Speaker 1: and then they set it down and now there's something
Speaker 1: in that view that wasn't there before and they just go, oh,
Speaker 1: it's package. So we still have that technology out there,
Speaker 1: just they've backed off the advertising from saying that it
Speaker 1: is a something that's going to recognize a human face
Speaker 1: and that's that's what this is. And so as someone
Speaker 1: who's invested this to myself in these systems, and I
Speaker 1: had to make a conscious effort on going okay, am
Speaker 1: I worried about surveillance or am I worried about security?
Speaker 1: And I think you come a point in time, and
Speaker 1: this may be a paradox here because the older you get,
Speaker 1: the more distrustful and paranoid you become. I don't want
Speaker 1: to say that, you know, you get older, you're paranoid.
Speaker 1: That's probably a bad choice of words. You know, I'm
Speaker 1: saying you tend to be a little more guarded, like
Speaker 1: things are changing around you so much, like I'm not
Speaker 1: sure about all this stuff, you know, and you consume
Speaker 1: news and the world's a dangerous place, YadA, YadA. Even
Speaker 1: though it's a much much safer world today than it
Speaker 1: was yesterday, it doesn't seem that way. But you know,
Speaker 1: you go back to the wild wild West, you go
Speaker 1: back to the nineteen hundred, nineteen fifties, it was much
Speaker 1: more dangerous society then. Now you hear more about the
Speaker 1: instances of disappearances, and you know, people killing each other
Speaker 1: and certainly some the homicide rates, and like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: get that, but yeah, as far as overall safety goes,
Speaker 1: and that's a whole bunch of different things besides someone
Speaker 1: who's a predator factoring, and so the world's pretty safe place
Speaker 1: from food and water supplies and national security and everything else.
Speaker 1: But you know, we're in a data relas messages all
Speaker 1: the time, so we have a sense of paranoid. And
Speaker 1: the older you get because things change and you yearn
Speaker 1: for the long the good old days, and the good
Speaker 1: days really weren't all that good. History tends to kind
Speaker 1: of wash out the bad things, you remember the good things.
Speaker 1: That's just how we're wired as human beings. But at
Speaker 1: my age now I look at it and go, you
Speaker 1: know what, I Oh, Okay, if I were younger, going
Speaker 1: I don't what's going to something could happen in my life,
Speaker 1: and I like, I don't. I'm I know I'm not
Speaker 1: going to become a criminal. At this age, I look
Speaker 1: at that and going, yeah, I'm I're going to be
Speaker 1: a those are a high profile criminal. I would have
Speaker 1: probably done that in my twenties, thirties, maybe forties, but
Speaker 1: by then you're like, I'm tired, I'm older. I just
Speaker 1: said it's gonna go through the motions of life. So
Speaker 1: now with the boy in my life going, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: more worried about security than I am about big Brother
Speaker 1: coming to get me, because up to this point, I've
Speaker 1: done nothing in my life remarkably remarkable enough to warrant
Speaker 1: the attention of federal or local or state authorities. At
Speaker 1: this point in my life like yeah, security for me,
Speaker 1: So put the camera's up. But then the cloud, I
Speaker 1: got this that you you know, and I like to
Speaker 1: see what's going on. Plus my wife, God bless her.
Speaker 1: I love her to death, but she is a nosy cuss.
Speaker 1: She Now she's she needs to know what's happening in
Speaker 1: the neighborhood. So if she needs to see something, she
Speaker 1: can pull up with a camera. Oh okay, I see
Speaker 1: what's going on. They're getting a pizza over there. That's
Speaker 1: a third night this week. All right, all right, get
Speaker 1: a hobby. You need to monitor with the neighbors at
Speaker 1: door dashing down the street. But it's interesting too that
Speaker 1: we allow this stuff, and it's just it's mission creep
Speaker 1: that you know, it wasn't long ago within our lifetimes,
Speaker 1: Like a camera was a big deal. You know, who
Speaker 1: had cameras. The TV stations had cameras, and the police,
Speaker 1: like they didn't have cameras, they didn't have body cameras,
Speaker 1: they'd have dashboard cameras, they have all this stuff. Like
Speaker 1: a camera was like, well, that's high technology right there.
Speaker 1: I'd imagine. I went around, But like in sixty nine
Speaker 1: when Armstrong they've got a camera that they've got tied
Speaker 1: in so you get live shots of the moon. I
Speaker 1: was like, what what.
Speaker 6: Can you imagine?
Speaker 7: What that was?
Speaker 4: Was?
Speaker 1: Was th in nineteen sixty nine, were like the astronauts
Speaker 1: are on the moon and they've got a camera and
Speaker 1: they're showing you live shots of the moon.
Speaker 2: That's crazy, and it used to be film.
Speaker 3: Now.
Speaker 1: The legendary Chick Poppy just passed away from Channel nine
Speaker 1: by the way, who uh literally one of the best
Speaker 1: photo journalists probably in the country, but happened to be
Speaker 1: here in Cincinnati, just passed away, I think at eighty two.
Speaker 1: And the stuff that he shot was remarkable. But that
Speaker 1: you know, he worked at a time too, even before videotape,
Speaker 1: where you you'd shoot the news and then you'd have
Speaker 1: to rush back to the station and have the film
Speaker 1: developed and you cross your fingers you got what you needed.
Speaker 1: And then in the late sixties early seventies, like the
Speaker 1: advent of videotape and live shots came along with these
Speaker 1: big giant things. If you watched I have some historical
Speaker 1: stuff from like a political conventions, Dan rathers on the
Speaker 1: floor of the sixty eight convention.
Speaker 2: There's a guy behind him as.
Speaker 1: His giant backpack on and that was the battery in
Speaker 1: the consolea They could, you know, have a live shot
Speaker 1: without a warrior, which was remarkable back then and it
Speaker 1: lasted for like four minutes because the battery technology wasn't good.
Speaker 1: You fast forward to today and we just take it
Speaker 1: for granted with cameras. You know, our TVs have cameras
Speaker 1: on them, or to what we're watching. Has a TV
Speaker 1: has a camera on it? Your computer monitor has a
Speaker 1: camera on it, your phone, you take that everywhere. You
Speaker 1: forget there's a camera on there, and we just, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm getting a cell phone, I'm getting in a sealphane.
Speaker 1: You know, I don't look that, suck your chinks on it.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna put a filter on this. We're doing stuff
Speaker 1: that you know, thirty forty years ago unheard of. Ten
Speaker 1: years ago is unheard of. And now it's just the
Speaker 1: cameras are so ingrained in our life, in our society
Speaker 1: that we just forget they're there and what they can do.
Speaker 1: And you know, when you do that, when they become
Speaker 1: omnipresent and they're just they're part of our lives, we
Speaker 1: just don't think about them because they're all over the place.
Speaker 1: We have devices that are connected to the Internet.
Speaker 2: I did that. You have a refrigerator that took to
Speaker 2: the internet.
Speaker 1: A dishwak we have a dishwasher, can hook it up
Speaker 1: to the wife, why do I need my dishwasher and
Speaker 1: a Wi Fi for I will say that the washer
Speaker 1: dry with a Wi Fi. That's pretty cool because it
Speaker 1: tells you when your draws are done. Little thing will
Speaker 1: pop up, go, hey, your draws clean, and that reminds you, Oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: don't forget it because I'll turn stinky. You got to
Speaker 1: put them in the dry or dryer draws off. So yeah,
Speaker 1: your draw is done. There you go. That's pretty cool.
Speaker 1: Oh you left the garage door open. Oh, it's a
Speaker 1: garage op. I'm going to look at this camera right here.
Speaker 1: I think it's pretty cool. But I'm also cautious and
Speaker 1: measured and making sure that things are secure as secure
Speaker 1: as as possible. I would contend if you really really
Speaker 1: want to, and maybe this is the case of Nancy
Speaker 1: Guthrie too, is that if you all want to target
Speaker 1: someone and get so you know, a particular individual, household
Speaker 1: or business, whatever, you know, you can you can monitor
Speaker 1: them and get on their their Wi Fi.
Speaker 2: You can see what they have in there.
Speaker 1: If you're really really good at this or no, someone is,
Speaker 1: if you wanted to infiltrate them, you can do that.
Speaker 1: You know, it tends to be the weakest passwords of
Speaker 1: the people who wind up being compromised, and especially in
Speaker 1: urban centers where there's a lot of I don't know,
Speaker 1: apartments or condos around and you could just pull it
Speaker 1: up and take a look at it as opposed to
Speaker 1: driving house to house. So but if you wanted to
Speaker 1: target one person, you certainly could do that. That may
Speaker 1: have very well been the case with Nancy Guthrie, but
Speaker 1: we have just it's become so ingrained like anything society.
Speaker 1: We just now it's boiling the frog. That analogy. If
Speaker 1: you want to put a frog in a pot of
Speaker 1: boiling water, the frogle jump out, but if you try
Speaker 1: to heat up slowly, but the frog and there doesn't
Speaker 1: know any better that we're all frogs in that regard,
Speaker 1: are we? And you wonder where this is all going
Speaker 1: in the future. And I think that's the fascinating part
Speaker 1: about it. That's today And they way, oh, okay, well
Speaker 1: it's too much with the facial recognition. But you know
Speaker 1: what it'll happen is at some point there'll be a
Speaker 1: high profan and maybe I don't think it's gonna be
Speaker 1: Nancy Guthrie, but now people go, you know what, that's
Speaker 1: a feature that I really want. I want to be
Speaker 1: able to find my dog. I want to be able
Speaker 1: to identify that person in front of my house. And
Speaker 1: I think enough people will throw as I did, they
Speaker 1: wait and go security versus big Brother surveillance. You know,
Speaker 1: you're always gonna have those two parties. And there's plenty
Speaker 1: of people who absolutely want no part of it. You know,
Speaker 1: won't even have people out there, won't have a cell
Speaker 1: phone because they're worried about surveillance. But the minute you
Speaker 1: walk out of your house, the minute you will go
Speaker 1: outside those doors of your home, you're being recorded. Which
Speaker 1: even makes this Nancy Guthrie disappearance even more confounding, is
Speaker 1: that there's so many cameras up all over the place
Speaker 1: at all times, in the ease and way which law
Speaker 1: enforcement can seamlessly put all those things together to find
Speaker 1: out who done it. You feel like at some point,
Speaker 1: any day, now, any minute, they're going to announce an
Speaker 1: act arrests because they have enough information to go with.
Speaker 1: And yet here it is two weeks and now we're
Speaker 1: in danger of the story falling off the face of
Speaker 1: the news, and you wonder what that means. At some
Speaker 1: point somebody's gonna get captured. It's almost too damn hard
Speaker 1: for them not to at this point, I guess. So anyway,
Speaker 1: either you're on the prosecurity side or the big brother side,
Speaker 1: just so I don't think you can go well, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a kind of blend to both worlds. It seems
Speaker 1: like an issue that's in an era of in a
Speaker 1: day of everything's gray with a big gray.
Speaker 2: Area out there. It seems like a black and white thing.
Speaker 1: Like once you dip your toe, you're pretty much once
Speaker 1: you go, yeah, I want a camera monitoring my front door,
Speaker 1: and then you go, well, what about the back door?
Speaker 1: What about the side? Or what about my garage? What
Speaker 1: about It's just it's just a you know, modern society
Speaker 1: we all got. We're all going to have to make
Speaker 1: that choice at some point, I suppose, so if either
Speaker 1: word about security or surveillance, but you can't have both anyway.
Speaker 1: We've got to get a news update in. I've rambled
Speaker 1: long enough on this President's Day. Coming up next, actually
Speaker 1: coming up tomorrow, it is Marty gro twenty twenty six
Speaker 1: at the Northern Kentucky Convention Center. Once again, I will
Speaker 1: be King of Marty Grau with my Queen Sheila Gray
Speaker 1: from Local twelve, who will join us next on the
Speaker 1: show to talk about that event. I'm going to ask
Speaker 1: her about the Nancy Guthrie thing. She's in the public
Speaker 1: eye and how does she look at that as someone
Speaker 1: on TV and you know, all about her life. I
Speaker 1: wonder if that's something that most people in her profession,
Speaker 1: or even my profession for the Matta look at and go, wow,
Speaker 1: that's pretty scary. Could that happen to me anyway? Sheila
Speaker 1: jump Shishi, my girl, Sheisha, I've known Chieshi for years.
Speaker 1: My good friend Sheila Grell joined the show next afternows
Speaker 1: on seven hundred W.
Speaker 2: Well Dowdy Cincinnati, don't want.
Speaker 1: To be an American idio Scott fluon show here.
Speaker 2: This is seven hundred WLW.
Speaker 1: Welcome to it. On this Monday morning, President's Day, twenty
Speaker 1: twenty six. I am not the only person in media
Speaker 1: that's working today. I just saw my dear friend Sheila
Speaker 1: Gray from Local twelve wrap up the morning show over
Speaker 1: there with her Zog and everyone else. Good morning, she
Speaker 1: she how are you dear?
Speaker 4: Good morning, my king? How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm well? My queen Tomorrow a martographer, homeless kids, twenty
Speaker 1: twenty six, Northern Kentucky Convention Center. Five point thirty, the
Speaker 1: VIP action begins, and then six thirty all the dominions
Speaker 1: file in and there's food, and there's drink, and there's
Speaker 1: revel where we have a good time. People throw bread.
Speaker 1: Sheila's up there with her infectious smile atop the giant
Speaker 1: rolling painters truck aka the float she got the painter's right,
Speaker 1: it's fantastic. It's a beautiful time.
Speaker 7: They were in here last week and I said, who
Speaker 7: came up with that idea of this crazy float traveling
Speaker 7: around the inside of a convention center.
Speaker 4: I think it was Gordy Snyder.
Speaker 7: But it's the thirty five year that they've been doing this,
Speaker 7: more than three million dollars raised.
Speaker 4: It's incredible. Yeah, you get a lot of laughs and
Speaker 4: then you do something good all at the same time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, one of these days, you know, you thirty five
Speaker 1: years old. That's how old that that that the thing
Speaker 1: is they move us around on. Yeah, take a paint
Speaker 1: Every year. There's a couple more screws loose, kind of
Speaker 1: like the rest of us here, And I just wonder
Speaker 1: one of these that we just fall into the buffet
Speaker 1: table of we're just covered in ham and cheese and uh,
Speaker 1: I have ways. Yeah, they're probably why we drowned, drowned
Speaker 1: in the vat at cheese.
Speaker 8: Uh.
Speaker 1: Of course, the Joe Burrow Foundation in uh in Fort
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Mercedes Ben's of Fort Mitchell, along with Jeff
Speaker 1: Ruby Foundation are our sponsor. We have three big sponsors
Speaker 1: this year, which means more money for the kids, which
Speaker 1: is wonderful.
Speaker 4: I know, it's incredible.
Speaker 7: And don't forget our friends at Jeff Wyler they are
Speaker 7: always really incredible too. But I'm so glad that we
Speaker 7: have these so many more backers behind us because we
Speaker 7: can do so many more things. We can provide so
Speaker 7: many more meals for Welcome House, Brighton Center and Bethany
Speaker 7: House Services because you know, the need is greater than
Speaker 7: it's been in a long time, with inflation and rising
Speaker 7: costs and things like that. Uh, people need a lot
Speaker 7: of help and we're able to provide it with this.
Speaker 7: It's really gratifying.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So this raises enough money to provide well over one
Speaker 1: hundred and fifty thousand meals a year to those three organizations.
Speaker 1: You mention your children to need and so they get
Speaker 1: a they get a solid meal once a day for
Speaker 1: an entire year, and and it always seems kind of
Speaker 1: like it seems weird that we're going to go eat
Speaker 1: and stuff ourselves for kids who don't enough to eat
Speaker 1: and drink, and but you know what, it works out,
Speaker 1: and the kids are the benefactors in the agencies there
Speaker 1: as well. So I always loved one of my favorite
Speaker 1: events of the year.
Speaker 7: Mine too, And I feel like I always see tons
Speaker 7: of my friends and neighbors there. You're always going to
Speaker 7: run into people you know and have a really good time.
Speaker 7: And DV eight is playing music this this year. The
Speaker 7: Silent Auction is already live if you wanted to go
Speaker 7: check that out and Marty grot nky dot org and
Speaker 7: check out some of the really cool stuff.
Speaker 4: There's of course some.
Speaker 7: Joe Burrow stuff in there, of course, begles and red
Speaker 7: gear and lots of really good bourbon baskets and things
Speaker 7: like that.
Speaker 4: So that's the fun part of it too.
Speaker 1: One of the big auctions from the Joe Burrow Foundation
Speaker 1: is the dinner, so they're gonna auction out dinner with
Speaker 1: Joe Burrow's parents that they are.
Speaker 4: The nicest people. I didn't really like that no.
Speaker 7: They I'm so glad that they're gonna be gonna be
Speaker 7: there and be part of this because they they are
Speaker 7: so nice. I feel like they're the the the people
Speaker 7: who keep Joe grounded, keep him like a normal guy.
Speaker 1: You know. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's there's sweet people and
Speaker 1: I I just heard that. I didn't know that was
Speaker 1: gonna be the big auction thing was dinner with them.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if it's their house are going to
Speaker 1: take out the restaurant could be Skyline.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: But the guy that I tell you there's one person
Speaker 1: in this town that you're gonna have a tough person
Speaker 1: out bidding because he's got serious, serious national broadcast money.
Speaker 1: That would be the afore mentioned Tom Brunneman. Tom Brenneman said,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna bid fast soon and often. I will outbid
Speaker 1: anyone in that room. And a chance to have dinner
Speaker 1: with the with the Boroughs, he will.
Speaker 4: Don't you think they would just go out to dinner
Speaker 4: with Tommy.
Speaker 1: No one really wants to hang out with tom. You
Speaker 1: gotta gotta pay, he said, I'm going to be He said,
Speaker 1: he's going to start the bidding. He's starting the bidding
Speaker 1: himself at ten thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: How about that.
Speaker 4: That's awesome.
Speaker 2: Good for Tom.
Speaker 7: You're really going to make You're really going to be there,
Speaker 7: and you're not going to stand me up this year
Speaker 7: like he did.
Speaker 1: I got sick as a dog last year. I don't
Speaker 1: know what hit me, Sheila. You did not want to
Speaker 1: be around me. Believe me. I think it was but
Speaker 1: I get the flu shot. I don't know. As I recall,
Speaker 1: I was sick as a dog, and I was very
Speaker 1: sad to have to call and go, oh my god, I.
Speaker 4: Can't make it.
Speaker 2: I will be here this year. I know it's very sack.
Speaker 1: It's very sad, but I will be unless maybe it's
Speaker 1: brewing inside me again right now. I don't know, Sheila,
Speaker 1: but I will come. Yeah. I don't care how sick
Speaker 1: I am. You know what if I projectile vomit on you,
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. I'll apologize. I had. Yeah, yeah, that's not
Speaker 1: that's not beads. He's thrown at the crowd. You you
Speaker 1: got to bring this down your outfit.
Speaker 4: Do you have a special outfit?
Speaker 2: No, because we have to wear the what is it
Speaker 2: the cape and the crown?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you don't really.
Speaker 4: Need it, but part of the time you're not wearing it.
Speaker 4: Have something?
Speaker 2: What are you wearing? Did you go get an outfit?
Speaker 2: You go to Nordstrom?
Speaker 7: I did not, but I found a cute purple top.
Speaker 7: Cute your purple Marty you off?
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I'm not going to be like Sarah Leice. She'll
Speaker 7: have a ball down the.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, it's ridiculous.
Speaker 4: That will always I always.
Speaker 7: I just like have so she has like fashion goals,
Speaker 7: like that is the goal that women want.
Speaker 1: To She Actually she has took today off just so
Speaker 1: she could. She started doing makeup this morning.
Speaker 4: That's pretty funny.
Speaker 1: It's pretty true that. It's very true, very very very
Speaker 1: very true. Actually, I'm wearing a wear it.
Speaker 2: I'm wearing a T shirt with your face on it.
Speaker 1: How's that? Oh that'd be cool.
Speaker 4: I would love that. Sign it for you?
Speaker 2: Will you a?
Speaker 1: Sheila Grays here from Local twelve. She is my queen
Speaker 1: Marty Grat tomorrow for It's Homeless Kids northn Kentucky Convention Center,
Speaker 1: which is always a wonderful thing. I do believe we
Speaker 1: do have some tickets left. Marty Grot twenty twenty six
Speaker 1: dot org. If you happen to be in your Bethany
Speaker 1: House or Brighton Center or Welcome House or Mercedes Benz
Speaker 1: a Fort Mitchell. You can buy a ticket, a actual
Speaker 1: ticket there and come. It's like one hundred bucks VIPs
Speaker 1: a little bit more, but it starts at five thirty.
Speaker 1: An extra hour of eating and drinking, so you can
Speaker 1: have the big piece of chicken if that's what you
Speaker 1: want to do. But it all goes to get one
Speaker 1: hundred fifty thousand meals a year to kids in need
Speaker 1: here in the Cincinnati area. You mentioned DV eight. Have
Speaker 1: you ever seen DV eight before?
Speaker 4: I don't think so.
Speaker 1: Well, you don't. You don't stay past five, so that's
Speaker 1: a problem because you get up into a godly hour.
Speaker 2: It's ridiculous.
Speaker 4: It's a huge issue.
Speaker 7: I miss a lot of entertaining things, going to bed
Speaker 7: as earliest.
Speaker 9: I really somedays is free with your tickets. Oh yeah,
Speaker 9: parking is free. I mentioned DV one of my most
Speaker 9: besties on Melissa Reed, who's just a lovely person, lead singer,
Speaker 9: one of the most talented, gifted vocalists.
Speaker 1: I think it's Cincinnati. I have seen them over the years
Speaker 1: many many times. That is that's a blast. They're absolutely great,
Speaker 1: what a great show that's going to be. You mentioned
Speaker 1: the free parking across the street as well. You can
Speaker 1: get the valet, the bougie valet with the VIP that's
Speaker 1: really really nice. And the nice part about it hill
Speaker 1: is by ten o'clock it's it's over and you go
Speaker 1: back and now you can take the next the day
Speaker 1: off and there's the Embassy Streets right across the street
Speaker 1: if you want to. Maybe you messed up Valentine's Day
Speaker 1: or forgot, this is a good Valentine's Day present.
Speaker 7: It's an absolutely it's a great present, or you know,
Speaker 7: just an ash Wednesday present now I'm just kidding. Wow.
Speaker 7: But the other great thing about it is if you
Speaker 7: don't have like Marty Gras beads and things like that,
Speaker 7: tell them there. Yeah, so you're all taken care of.
Speaker 7: You just and you can even buy your ticket at
Speaker 7: the door. If you don't have time to get over
Speaker 7: to one of the spots that we're helping to buy
Speaker 7: your tickets, you can take them up here.
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is nice. So there's also a million auction
Speaker 1: items there too, and you lose your mind with all
Speaker 1: the cool stuff that they have mentioned. The Robin Joe Burrow,
Speaker 1: the the Dinner with the Burrows. But also I think
Speaker 1: aren't they are they doing it again this year where
Speaker 1: they auction off and you will rub someone's feet? Is
Speaker 1: that what? Well, that's where like a foot massage, Shila
Speaker 1: Graham foot massage.
Speaker 4: That is not I have not signed off on.
Speaker 2: Why don't you put yourself out there a little bit?
Speaker 4: Huh?
Speaker 2: You should do something for the kids.
Speaker 7: That would be the kind of thing that would be
Speaker 7: on that would be on the internet forever.
Speaker 4: You'd never get rid of it.
Speaker 1: She'll why would you say that? That's dumb? Sheillot doesn't
Speaker 1: their feet are gross? You? Yeah, she comes to your
Speaker 1: house and gives you a foot massage.
Speaker 2: How's that?
Speaker 1: No? Not, No, I'll do anything for the kids, but
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that.
Speaker 2: All right. We will be in the uh so right
Speaker 2: next to the door.
Speaker 1: You and I will be there. We do pictures in
Speaker 1: the in the King and Queen Garb too as well.
Speaker 1: And I think John John is our gesture, perfect gesture,
Speaker 1: because that guy love to get dressed up like a
Speaker 1: He dresses up like those He really does, doesn't he?
Speaker 4: Yes, it's like a little.
Speaker 1: Kid with that stuff. He's got spider man, he's aid
Speaker 1: the of course Elf. He starts dressing the Elf costume
Speaker 1: right after Thanksgiving. It doesn't He's still wearing it as
Speaker 1: a matter of fact. That's pretty tired. Now he's got
Speaker 1: a Gester outfit for tomorrow night.
Speaker 2: What should be funny.
Speaker 4: Yep, it will be funny. I hope it has tights.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, he needs Steen's investors and maybe some
Speaker 1: new tights there.
Speaker 2: Talk about the food really quick, the food and dress.
Speaker 7: We had people in here from Governor's house the other
Speaker 7: day and they're making this short rib with mushroom of
Speaker 7: zoto that will just set you free.
Speaker 4: You also have Kingcakes there, you have.
Speaker 7: Oriental Walk will be there with Chinese food, and tomorrow's
Speaker 7: Lunar New Year, you'll have New Orleans style food. Just
Speaker 7: so many restaurants from both sides of the river come
Speaker 7: over there. And don't forget all the different bourbons and
Speaker 7: beers and wines, all kinds of spirits. It's really really fun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's more than you can drink and eat there.
Speaker 1: So you know, they have little samples and you try
Speaker 1: it and you're like, well, I lot some more of
Speaker 1: that and don't fill up on the first station there's
Speaker 1: the there's the advice for you.
Speaker 4: That's right, pace yourself, Pace.
Speaker 1: Yourself, go around the room at least twice, and then
Speaker 1: it's kind of like going to taste the Cincinnati. You
Speaker 1: go around and you strategic go oh yeah that that
Speaker 1: that that, and then you go back and you hit them.
Speaker 1: You got to you absolutely have to scout. There's some
Speaker 1: advanced scouting going on.
Speaker 7: I think there's fifty different restaurants and distilleries and things
Speaker 7: this year, or fifty five.
Speaker 1: You mentioned it lunar. Yeah, I mean right. It's all
Speaker 1: the food and all the drink for one ticket. So
Speaker 1: I would say this is like the best Valentine's Day
Speaker 1: gift you can get because you're helping, you know, it's
Speaker 1: a good cause and that makes your heart happy. But
Speaker 1: also the food and drink, it's it's fantastic. And it's
Speaker 1: a Tuesday night and you can't get too crazy on
Speaker 1: a Tuesday night. It's perfect, right, yeah, absolutely perfect.
Speaker 4: That's good.
Speaker 1: You mentioned it's a lunar New Year. Is that is
Speaker 1: that Chinese New Year?
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's Chinese New Year, and uh it's going to
Speaker 7: be the Year of the Horse, the Year of the Horse.
Speaker 7: Tomorrow night, I don't know how often Lunar New Year
Speaker 7: and Fat Tuesday.
Speaker 4: Co inside like that. I think that's kind of cool neither.
Speaker 1: But yeah, okay, so I gotta you gotta remember now
Speaker 1: it's still you're the horse, because Sheila, don't keep writing
Speaker 1: the year of the Cat on your checks. You got it.
Speaker 1: That's the worst part about the Lunar New Year's I
Speaker 1: keep writing, I keep putting here the snake on my check.
Speaker 1: I got to cross it out. It's terrible, It's absolutely terrible.
Speaker 1: I thought you on your chest, on my chest. You're
Speaker 1: still thinking about foot rubs. She she's foot rubs. She's
Speaker 1: gonna put a booth though I've got them. I got
Speaker 1: Shila flustered lust Her face face now mashes the cutar.
Speaker 1: Her hair, it's all red. She's all red, looks like
Speaker 1: a big sunburn. And I apologize in advance because I
Speaker 1: know you're gonna you're like, you're the nicest person in
Speaker 1: the world that you're gonna get pelted with stale bread.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry in advance.
Speaker 7: It happened last year, and you weren't even there to
Speaker 7: take it and protect me.
Speaker 1: A drill. Sheila got her nose broken. She she was
Speaker 1: off our for three weeks.
Speaker 7: I know hopefully they'll have like a plastic surgery basket
Speaker 7: just the case.
Speaker 2: Yeah right, exactly.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And the thing is I have nothing to do with
Speaker 1: So McConnell started this years ago where his his drunk
Speaker 1: buddies would show up at Marty Grot. Uh and and
Speaker 1: there's a there's a Clossman bread stand there and all
Speaker 1: they all they give you out is bread, just rolls,
Speaker 1: and I don't know if they have butter.
Speaker 2: I think it's just dry bread.
Speaker 1: And uh yeah, yeah, it's last year's and they tag
Speaker 1: it and go, here's some bread. And his buddies were
Speaker 1: like just started tossing bread at him, and then it
Speaker 1: became hurling bread. And now that I've been doing this
Speaker 1: where well we've been doing this for like style last
Speaker 1: ten years, it's the trend is continue where Mike will
Speaker 1: show up and throw bread at us. And we had
Speaker 1: Austin Almore and Tony Pike and we were getting absolutely
Speaker 1: raked over the a couple of years ago. Uh and
Speaker 1: maybe subconscoence. That's why I got sick last year. I
Speaker 1: can't I can't handle the bread, the bread attacks anymore.
Speaker 1: It's unprecedented. Yeah, chick and I don't want to get
Speaker 1: in that and tholes, you got thirty five roles.
Speaker 2: Coming at you at one time.
Speaker 4: You didn't show up before school for the fight.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, I got a test today. Mom, I'm sick,
Speaker 1: but I'm sick going to school, so watch out for
Speaker 1: flying watch out for flying flying bread. So yeah, it'll
Speaker 1: be It's a fantastic time. And of course this benefits,
Speaker 1: this benefits of the homeless agencies in town, Brighton Center,
Speaker 1: Welcome House, Bething House for Kids. I want to can
Speaker 1: I take it serious for a second here and totally
Speaker 1: Martin grad late because I was thinking about this before
Speaker 1: you came home today. I was just talking about the
Speaker 1: Nancy Guthrie case, which of course is it's just horrible
Speaker 1: watching Savannah Guthrie. Uh and just how how mostly broken
Speaker 1: to the point where I don't know if you saw this,
Speaker 1: but she's not considering maybe never turning to the Today
Speaker 1: Show because I've heard that because she feels that she's
Speaker 1: responsible for putting her mom on camera. And I thought,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm talking to my girl, Sheila. Not that
Speaker 1: you've done that before, but you know you Today's Today's
Speaker 1: TV Mornings. Basically, if you go back in the day
Speaker 1: to the you know, radio morning shows kind of like
Speaker 1: best friend waking up to you.
Speaker 2: Guys, and TV have taken that over.
Speaker 1: It's been that way for a long time, and so
Speaker 1: you guys open up your you know, you you come
Speaker 1: across as friendly and open, and people feel they know
Speaker 1: you. You see what happened with her? Does that concern you?
Speaker 1: Does that like something you now thought about after this happened?
Speaker 7: You know what I thought about it before this happened,
Speaker 7: because I get concerned about people putting like every stage
Speaker 7: of their kids faces and lives online, you know.
Speaker 4: And I'm not judging.
Speaker 7: I mean, everybody can do what they want to do,
Speaker 7: but I'm kind of careful with like just what I
Speaker 7: post about my family and I you know, what Savannah got.
Speaker 7: I would hate for her to think that she's somehow
Speaker 7: responsible for this.
Speaker 4: She's not bad.
Speaker 7: People do bad things and she is in no way
Speaker 7: responsible for that. But I can totally understand why she
Speaker 7: would maybe want to take a step back from from this,
Speaker 7: you know, being in the spotlight, after after what she's
Speaker 7: been through, you know. And I'm hoping, against hope that
Speaker 7: they find her mom and she'll be all right and
Speaker 7: she can go and spend time with her mom and
Speaker 7: take a step back that way. But I think I
Speaker 7: think the way with just the way the world is
Speaker 7: right now, I think everybody should be concerned with how
Speaker 7: much we put out there in public, even whether you're
Speaker 7: on TV or you're not.
Speaker 4: I mean, you're talking about influencers and people.
Speaker 7: You don't know what's gonna make somebody decide that they
Speaker 7: like the way you look or somebody in your family looks,
Speaker 7: and you can because anybody can be a target. Unfortunately,
Speaker 7: that's one of the dangers of social media and just
Speaker 7: how public everything is now.
Speaker 1: I kind of get where she's coming from. She's like, well,
Speaker 1: I put my mom on. I kind of made her,
Speaker 1: you know, a mini celebrity. We had that they shot
Speaker 1: a something at her house, I guess in Tucson, and
Speaker 1: so some people can see the inside of her house
Speaker 1: and thinking that, well, you know, it's good for ratings,
Speaker 1: and it's also you know, it's that side of me
Speaker 1: and the personal interesting. And and now she's second guessing
Speaker 1: that whole thing, like she had something to do with this.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: It's just it's so heartbreaking because I wasn't. It's just
Speaker 1: like it could have happened to anyone.
Speaker 7: It could have happened to anybody, and I every time
Speaker 7: I see her, my heart just goes out to her.
Speaker 7: You know, you can just tell that she's she's just
Speaker 7: tortured by this what no matter whoever had anything to
Speaker 7: do with it. Her mom is missing, and she's you know,
Speaker 7: I'm sure she's not sleeping, and I just can't. It
Speaker 7: just breaks my.
Speaker 1: Heart, that's the whole thing.
Speaker 4: But you can't, you can't look at her and not
Speaker 4: just be.
Speaker 1: Heartbreaking hundred percent.
Speaker 2: Anyway.
Speaker 1: It's again, you know, you're not have no idea how
Speaker 1: people react to things, that's sure. Whether you're you know,
Speaker 1: you or Savannah Guthrie or me or someone on social
Speaker 1: media and influence whoever it might be, you just don't
Speaker 1: know anyway. So what time you get in there, Tom
Speaker 1: are like at what five thirty five twenty nine?
Speaker 7: I'll be there in place, ready to go, with every
Speaker 7: hair in its place by five thirty.
Speaker 1: Five thirty if anything, She's prompt well, And that also
Speaker 1: takes twenty minutes to figure. So we wear these capes
Speaker 1: with the with the helmets and everything, and it's always
Speaker 1: like a it's always this process puzzle. It really is.
Speaker 1: Every year. Every year she does like I just forum
Speaker 1: she puts her stuff on. I've got this cape I
Speaker 1: got to put on, and it's like there's these weird
Speaker 1: snaps on it. They haven't heard of Bell Crow. I'm
Speaker 1: the damn king. I should I should be able to
Speaker 1: be had someone beheaded?
Speaker 4: Yeah, you should have like your own staff of people.
Speaker 1: And it's just that always falls off I just because
Speaker 1: people step on it.
Speaker 2: It's like it's a whole thing, really is. It's a
Speaker 2: whole fun. It's a whole The things we have to
Speaker 2: do with to help the children.
Speaker 4: We wouldn't have it any other way.
Speaker 2: We wouldn't.
Speaker 1: It's always a it's a great event and I love
Speaker 1: the I love the cause too. It's the best part.
Speaker 1: So anyway, if you heard this you're interested in, Hey,
Speaker 1: last minute, let's do it. Northern Kentucky Convention Center Tomorrow
Speaker 1: starts at five thirty for the a VIP six thirty
Speaker 1: for general. It's like one hundred bucks Marty Grot twenty
Speaker 1: twenty six dot org. It's a virtual tickets, So go ahead.
Speaker 1: It's it's gonna help feed kids, and you have I
Speaker 1: guarantee you're gonna have a blast, bring some friends with you.
Speaker 1: She she I see tomorrow.
Speaker 4: All right, Scott, You'll see you Tomorrow'll.
Speaker 1: Take care as you goo My friend Shila Gray on
Speaker 1: the Scott Sloan Show This morning with news happening in
Speaker 1: about three minutes here, and then Mental Health Monday with
Speaker 1: Julie h that's next seven hundred WLW.
Speaker 7: Everyone needs help every now and then, and she's here
Speaker 7: to help us get our heads right.
Speaker 1: This is Mental Health Monday with mental health expert Julie Hattershire.
Speaker 1: It is pretty persistent when it comes to us as Americans,
Speaker 1: and that is the issue of rest in recovery because
Speaker 1: we were taught at an early age it's about productivity.
Speaker 1: It's about uh burn baby burn and burn the candle
Speaker 1: at both ends and it becomes addictive. Right, It's part
Speaker 1: of your DNA and that that productivity and that always
Speaker 1: on the go attitude really riaks havoc on our bodies
Speaker 1: and especially our mental health. So on that this morning
Speaker 1: is our licensed mental health therapist from Beconnected dot Care
Speaker 1: in Clifton. That's Julie Hanisher. Julie, welcome, how are you?
Speaker 1: Uh oh wait a minute, we're losing your signal here,
Speaker 1: we've got a bad sell. Hold on, I'm gonna put
Speaker 1: you on hold. I'm gonna pick it back up. See
Speaker 1: you there we go, We got you. You're back now. Mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that was our Our end is terrible because
Speaker 1: that was gonna be a lot. I'll be burned out
Speaker 1: if I had to fill the next fifteen minutes myself.
Speaker 5: Talking about just chit chat exactly.
Speaker 1: Idle, stupid chit chat. And people are tired of me babbling.
Speaker 1: So the core issue is higher achievers, right, and I
Speaker 1: think a lot of people see themselves as higher achievers,
Speaker 1: and that means you never get to rest. That means
Speaker 1: you never get to turn it off, and even when
Speaker 1: you allegedly turn it off, you don't turn it off.
Speaker 1: So from a clinical perspective, here, being a licensed mental
Speaker 1: health therapist, what are the underlying psychological mechanisms that make
Speaker 1: us feel so uncomfortable or threatening to turn off our productivity?
Speaker 5: A lot going on.
Speaker 8: There, And you know, last week or the week before,
Speaker 8: we talked about cognitive reserve as being important for managing
Speaker 8: the effects of dementia.
Speaker 5: And one of the things that I think we don't realize.
Speaker 8: Is that mental energy is a finite resource that we
Speaker 8: have a limited amount of it in any given day,
Speaker 8: and we need to replenish and rejuvenate not just our
Speaker 8: physical energy, but our mental and our cognitive energy so
Speaker 8: that we don't burn ourselves out. And there are a lot.
Speaker 5: Of reasons why this is.
Speaker 8: Hard to do, and one of the biggest ones is
Speaker 8: that information and stimulation comes at us twenty four to seven.
Speaker 8: It's really hard to shut ourselves down and unplug from
Speaker 8: all of the stimulation and all the information that's coming
Speaker 8: at us. And when we think of ourselves as high achievers,
Speaker 8: are highly productive, and society rewards that, resting can feel
Speaker 8: self indulgent, it can feel like a waste of time.
Speaker 8: It can feel like we're being lazy if we are
Speaker 8: resting and other people are still kicking it.
Speaker 3: And so one of.
Speaker 5: The things that we need to do is understand there.
Speaker 8: Are different types of rest that we need. There are
Speaker 8: seven actually that we've determined, and figure out what works
Speaker 8: for us in terms of how to get them, because
Speaker 8: what looks like rest to us might not look like
Speaker 8: rest to somebody else and vice versa.
Speaker 1: Okay, so is there a difference between there's mental rest
Speaker 1: and physical rust? Are they one and the same.
Speaker 8: No, they're different, Okay, and there and there are five
Speaker 8: other types as well. So physical rest is either it
Speaker 8: can either be passive or active. So it can be
Speaker 8: literally sleep, it can be lying around on the couch
Speaker 8: or sitting still and doing something. But it can also
Speaker 8: be active rest if you tend to be physically active,
Speaker 8: doing yoga or stretching, or taking a walk that's not
Speaker 8: a speed walk, that's more.
Speaker 3: Of a stroll.
Speaker 8: So active recovery down days can be really important, or
Speaker 8: downtimes during.
Speaker 5: Your day can be really import No professional or.
Speaker 8: Elite athlete goes one hundred percent every day. They have
Speaker 8: days where they hit it harder and they have days
Speaker 8: where they do restorative practices.
Speaker 1: And they cross train.
Speaker 8: So football players do yoga, dancers do strength training, people
Speaker 8: who run do strength training, and people who lift do
Speaker 8: active cardio, so they cross train to keep their bodies moving,
Speaker 8: but to activate different muscles and different nervous systems attributes.
Speaker 8: So that is one way of getting physical rest. It
Speaker 8: still feels productive, but you're not hitting at one hundred
Speaker 8: percent every day.
Speaker 5: Mental rest, on the other hand.
Speaker 4: Is different.
Speaker 8: That's allowing your brain to do different things or nothing
Speaker 8: at all. So meditation is a form of mental rest.
Speaker 8: But if you are a numbers person, doing something creative
Speaker 8: or doing something that's more verbal, like reading a novel
Speaker 8: or painting, can be a form of mental rest because
Speaker 8: you're shifting from one type of task or activity or
Speaker 8: thought process to a different type of task or activity
Speaker 8: or thought process, which gives the part of your brain
Speaker 8: that was doing what you primarily do a break and
Speaker 8: allows you to stretch and grow, but also gives those
Speaker 8: parts of your brain a break.
Speaker 1: What about folks who, certainly not me, can never turn
Speaker 1: their brains off. It's like a million things are coming
Speaker 1: at you all the time.
Speaker 2: What is that?
Speaker 8: Well, first of all, shutting down from the things coming
Speaker 8: at you can help. So another type of rest that
Speaker 8: we need, Remember I said there are seven. Another one
Speaker 8: is sensory rest, and that's disconnecting from your screens. That's
Speaker 8: disconnecting from external stimuli coming in. That's turning the TV off,
Speaker 8: turning your phone off, in your computer off, maybe lighting
Speaker 8: a candle or two, and just sitting with maybe a book,
Speaker 8: or sitting with a musical instrument that you play, or
Speaker 8: sitting with some music in the background. Disconnecting from the
Speaker 8: inputs gives your brain a chance to stop processing the inputs,
Speaker 8: because everything that comes in your brain has to process.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 8: Yeah, and making a conscious effort to disconnect from that,
Speaker 8: to disconnect from the sensory inputs, can help your brain
Speaker 8: learn to shut down on its own without having to
Speaker 8: do that, so you prime it to be able to quiet.
Speaker 8: Doesn't have to be as significant as meditation, but it
Speaker 8: can be taking a walk in a park without your headphones,
Speaker 8: without a phone, just enjoying nature around you and shutting
Speaker 8: out all of the other stimulation.
Speaker 3: That's coming at you.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I would just think about all the stuff I
Speaker 1: gotta do when I'm done with my walk. What about
Speaker 1: just a good old nap? What about just I pass
Speaker 1: out for twenty minutes? Is that fine? Is that good?
Speaker 1: Is that the same thing as meditation.
Speaker 8: It's not the same thing as meditation, But naps are great.
Speaker 8: Twenty to thirty minutes is ideal. More than that, you
Speaker 8: start to get into a full sleep cycle, and that
Speaker 8: can be a problem. But twenty to thirty minute apps
Speaker 8: are ideal. I have a couch in my office and
Speaker 8: I regularly take twenty or thirty minute naps in between clients.
Speaker 1: It's fabulous.
Speaker 8: It's really good for your brain. It's a quick shutdown
Speaker 8: and a quick power up again. And if you keep.
Speaker 5: It in that twenty to thirty minute range, you can typically.
Speaker 8: Wake right back up and not be groggy. Anymore than that,
Speaker 8: you run the risk of being groggy because you're part
Speaker 8: way through a sleep cycle at that point.
Speaker 1: At some point in my life, I'm going to treat
Speaker 1: it like ice, Like if you have an injury, you
Speaker 1: put ice on, you know, whatever the sore part is.
Speaker 1: Twenty minutes of every hour. I'm going to nap twenty
Speaker 1: minutes of every hour. See how that works out good
Speaker 1: for you?
Speaker 5: And I want I want to see how I want
Speaker 5: to see how that works.
Speaker 8: I can't imagine that every hour.
Speaker 1: I'm digging twenty minutes resetting and I'll be really productive
Speaker 1: for the next forty minutes.
Speaker 2: But maybe there's something there.
Speaker 1: Julie Hatters Share, a licensed metal health therapist, on the
Speaker 1: show on seven hundred Wow Mental Health Monday, of course,
Speaker 1: and we're talking about resting is an important component here.
Speaker 1: We don't do enough of it. And I'm not talking
Speaker 1: about sleep, that's a different thing, but we're talking about
Speaker 1: just mental rest because we're at higher burnout, your ability, anxiety,
Speaker 1: all those things you mentioned.
Speaker 2: There are two well seven core issues here mental rest
Speaker 2: versus physical rest.
Speaker 8: What else is there, Well, there was sensory which we
Speaker 8: talked about reducing the inputs. There's social rest stepping away
Speaker 8: if you are a social butterfly, stepping away from social commitments,
Speaker 8: spending more time alone or one on one with someone
Speaker 8: that you really connect with, versus all of the social
Speaker 8: engagement which requires a lot of output of energy. We
Speaker 8: all need time when we are more isolated and more cocooned.
Speaker 5: Some of us need more than others.
Speaker 8: Introverts tend to need more than extroverts, but we all
Speaker 8: need some sort of social rest creativity, so taking a
Speaker 8: break from being productive and focusing on the output and
Speaker 8: spending time focusing on the process. So the purpose of
Speaker 8: creative rest is to focus on the process of.
Speaker 1: What you're doing, not the product or the output.
Speaker 8: So it doesn't matter whether you can play a song
Speaker 8: on the piano, but learning to play the piano is
Speaker 8: a kind of rest, because rest basically is an intentional
Speaker 8: disengagement from effort. So you are disengaging from one type
Speaker 8: of effort and engaging in a different type of effort intentionally,
Speaker 8: so creative rest is important for many people's. Spiritual rest
Speaker 8: is important if you have a spiritual practice, whether it's
Speaker 8: a religion, or you spend time in nature or you meditate.
Speaker 8: Shifting from the world that we're in now to something
Speaker 8: with higher meaning for you, that shift intentionally is a
Speaker 8: form of rest, and the last one is emotional rest.
Speaker 8: So a lot of us you and some degree as
Speaker 8: a therapists, I present a not completely authentic face to
Speaker 8: the world. So being able to step away from that
Speaker 8: and be truly genuinely, fully authentic with some people in
Speaker 8: your life, not having to present your corporate fath or
Speaker 8: your professional face or your tea your face, or in
Speaker 8: my case is a therapist face. But being able to
Speaker 8: just genuinely be truly who you are is a form
Speaker 8: of rest as well. But the idea is not that
Speaker 8: you do nothing when you rest, it's that you do
Speaker 8: something different than what you had been doing since your
Speaker 8: attention intentionally to something else.
Speaker 1: Take me through what that looks like.
Speaker 8: Okay, so, if you are a numbers person or and
Speaker 8: you sit at your desk all day, let's say, or
Speaker 8: you're an account or in actuary and you sit at
Speaker 8: your desk all day doing numbers work. A form of
Speaker 8: rest for you might be taking a long walk with
Speaker 8: your dog. A form of rest for you might be
Speaker 8: cooking a delicious meal. A form of rest for you
Speaker 8: might be reading a book instead of staring at numbers
Speaker 8: all day, reading a novel something for fun. It might
Speaker 8: be spending time with people that you like rather than
Speaker 8: spending time in front of a screen.
Speaker 5: Conversely, if you are a people person.
Speaker 8: And you are out in the world a lot engaging
Speaker 8: with people, of form of for us might be something
Speaker 8: more solitary. It might be having a conversation one on
Speaker 8: one with one person, a deep conversation, not a whole
Speaker 8: lot of less deep conversations. It might be shutting down
Speaker 8: and reading a book. It might be taking a nap.
Speaker 8: That might be going for a walk. It's intentionally shifting
Speaker 8: so that you're cross training your brain. Like you cross
Speaker 8: train your body as an athlete, you're cross training your brain.
Speaker 1: Okay, now that makes sense. You're just doing something like
Speaker 1: you mentioned music a couple times. I think that's I
Speaker 1: was reading something about Alzheimer's, Like if you learn to
Speaker 1: play an instrument, that's why we're just talking about this
Speaker 1: playing an instrument is wonderful for you because you're exercising
Speaker 1: part of your brain you probably haven't in years. If
Speaker 1: you're you know, something you pick up or just doing
Speaker 1: the act of doing that is generally most people their
Speaker 1: job doesn't involve learning and playing a musical instrument. If
Speaker 1: you are, if that's a hobby, ors that's great, but
Speaker 1: that is something that continues to pay dividends later in life.
Speaker 5: It absolutely does.
Speaker 8: Music is a language, and so if you learn to
Speaker 8: play an instry that you're learning a different language, or
Speaker 8: if you learn to produce music in some way, you're
Speaker 8: learning a different language. It very often requires physical dexterity.
Speaker 8: All almost all instruments require physical dexterity. If you're a singer,
Speaker 8: that's not the case, but everything else does. And it
Speaker 8: can put you in community with other musicians, So it
Speaker 8: can give you a different kind of community than you
Speaker 8: might have with your golf league or your tennis club
Speaker 8: or your ma gen club. It can put you in
Speaker 8: community with other types of people who also are engaged
Speaker 8: in this activity. In this language, and music lights up
Speaker 8: a primal part of the brain that language does but
Speaker 8: that other things in our world don't, So it helps
Speaker 8: strengthen the brain language connection as well, because music is
Speaker 8: very often the first language we hear as babies, our
Speaker 8: mothers sing to us, so it's very often the first
Speaker 8: language here.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, all right, makes sense. What does perfectionism play
Speaker 1: a role in this? I would imagine, just by what
Speaker 1: you're saying, if you tend to be a type are
Speaker 1: perfectionist by nature, that these burnout and challenges when it
Speaker 1: comes to mental health is really challenging.
Speaker 2: For you because you feel like you always.
Speaker 8: Have to be on, You always have to be on,
Speaker 8: you always have to be producing, and your product always
Speaker 8: has to be excellent to perfect, and so perfectionism often
Speaker 8: prevents people from trying new things and from taking breaks
Speaker 8: from what they're doing, and from growing and stretching and
Speaker 8: challenging themselves, because the goal is the product, not the process.
Speaker 8: The goal is the product has to be perfect, not
Speaker 8: the process needs to be fun or engaging or a
Speaker 8: learning opportunity or growth and enrichment. It's about the end result,
Speaker 8: and the end result has to be perfect, so they tend.
Speaker 5: People who are perfectionists.
Speaker 8: Tend not to take rest intentionally because that feels like
Speaker 8: quitting or giving up or being lazy.
Speaker 1: Or unproductive, and.
Speaker 8: They tend not to like to do new things when
Speaker 8: they're challenging themselves because they don't want to make mistakes.
Speaker 8: They don't want to be seen as being less than
Speaker 8: perfect by themselves or other people. And it's the product,
Speaker 8: not the process, that matters. So part of intentionally shifting
Speaker 8: your focus and taking arrest is focusing more on the process.
Speaker 8: What am I learning, what am I growing?
Speaker 3: What is stretching in me?
Speaker 5: Versus did I do that right?
Speaker 1: Okay? But but for people and I maybe high pressure
Speaker 1: professional or a doctor or first responders things like that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what does?
Speaker 1: The stakes are generally high and work and truly be urgent,
Speaker 1: But how do you help them navigate tension between legitimate
Speaker 1: work demands and need for rest because there's a balance there.
Speaker 1: I mean, if you're a Doeer doctor, for example, you
Speaker 1: can't How do you turn that off? Yeah?
Speaker 5: It's really hard though. People in high.
Speaker 8: Trendaline professions like that have a very difficult time turning
Speaker 8: it off. And one of the things when I'm working
Speaker 8: with them in my practice that I will tell them
Speaker 8: is that rest and self care are good ethics because
Speaker 8: you cannot make good decisions for your patients or the
Speaker 8: people you are rescuing, and you cannot operate at full
Speaker 8: capacity if you are tapped out, if you are burned out,
Speaker 8: if you're hungry, if you're tired, if you're angry, it's
Speaker 8: really hard to operate.
Speaker 5: At full capacity.
Speaker 8: So taking care of yourself is ethical and actually benefits
Speaker 8: the people that you are serving more than pushing yourself
Speaker 8: past your limit. I don't want an er doc working
Speaker 8: on me if I'm brought in with a heart attack,
Speaker 8: who has not eaten, not slept, not had a chance
Speaker 8: to go to the bathroom, not had a good solid
Speaker 8: drink of water, and who's been.
Speaker 5: On shift for twelve hours.
Speaker 8: I mean, if that's the only person available, fine, but
Speaker 8: I'd really rather have one who's been fed and hydrated
Speaker 8: and had some downtime and has is really fully on
Speaker 8: board and fully present, rather than someone who's running on fumes.
Speaker 8: So rest and so self care are ethics issues for
Speaker 8: people who are taking care of other people in high
Speaker 8: risk situations.
Speaker 1: For me, like, if I schedule a workout or something
Speaker 1: that's non negotiable, that's like my time, and I've learned
Speaker 1: to do that over the years ago. No, I need
Speaker 1: some me time. Or whatever it might be doing. And
Speaker 1: I've been more forceful about that, and there's some people like, well, Okay,
Speaker 1: I guess I can give that up. But it sounds
Speaker 1: to me like you should be scheduling rest, like it
Speaker 1: should be on your schedule.
Speaker 8: I think you should, and I think that some people
Speaker 8: are better at doing that than other people. So I
Speaker 8: will tell you I'm not great at it, but I
Speaker 8: will tell you that my sessions are fifty minutes, not
Speaker 8: a full hour, And in that ten minutes in between clients,
Speaker 8: I let my brain disengage from what I was thinking
Speaker 8: about what was going on in my room and start
Speaker 8: to think a little bit about what's coming next for me.
Speaker 8: But I take that ten minutes to just kind of
Speaker 8: take a pause, take a reset, get a drink of water,
Speaker 8: walk up and down the hall a couple of times,
Speaker 8: and then I'm ready for my next client. When I
Speaker 8: was first out, I would do sixty minute sessions and
Speaker 8: I would roll from one client to the next time
Speaker 8: to the next, and I found that I was not
Speaker 8: nearly as effective in doing that. So I literally had
Speaker 8: ten minutes of rest built into my workday every hour
Speaker 8: on the.
Speaker 1: Fifty minutes just to take a break.
Speaker 8: Some people don't. Yeah, some people don't have the ability
Speaker 8: to do that, which makes perfect sense. But if you're
Speaker 8: at work and you get a lunch break of any kind,
Speaker 8: take ten or fifteen minutes of that and do something different.
Speaker 8: Don't eat lunch at your desk, scrolling your email the
Speaker 8: whole time. Take ten or fifteen minutes of that and
Speaker 8: take a walk or close your eyes for a few minutes.
Speaker 5: If you're in a place where you.
Speaker 8: Can do that, or get outside, or have a conversation
Speaker 8: with a friend or a coworker, call your mom or dad,
Speaker 8: do something different, take a break from what you are doing.
Speaker 8: You can't hit at one hundred percent all the time.
Speaker 8: It's not healthy and it's not sustainable.
Speaker 1: Julie hattersh here our license mental health therapist on the
Speaker 1: Scott's Loan show Every Monthing Mental Health Monday.
Speaker 2: With Julie H.
Speaker 1: So you can get a hold of her her handles
Speaker 1: heye Julie au l I e at B the letter
Speaker 1: B connected dot care, Hey Juliet B connected dot care
Speaker 1: as an email if you want to shoot her something
Speaker 1: and say hey, good job, or are calling you out
Speaker 1: on something, or maybe you've got an idea for a
Speaker 1: future topics. She's there for it and we talk every
Speaker 1: Monday morning and next Monday, no exception. Julie, have a
Speaker 1: great day.
Speaker 2: Thanks again. I appreciate you so much.
Speaker 5: Thank you. Talk to you later BYFYE.
Speaker 1: News is on the way in just about five minutes.
Speaker 1: Your full update as a fog burns off looking at
Speaker 1: the decent day and warm too warm, Warm Warm, Scott's
Speaker 1: slown down seven hundred WW reminder, iHeartMedia and the Big One.
Speaker 1: Salute Cincinnati's own Procter and gamble. If you've got someone
Speaker 1: there you'd like for us to recognize on the air,
Speaker 1: just text us their name to five to one, eight
Speaker 1: eight one and be listening. Do you want to be
Speaker 1: an American idiot?
Speaker 10: Pull me back on seven hundred wl W on this
Speaker 10: President's Day and coming off of the vapor trail of love,
Speaker 10: vapor trail of love?
Speaker 2: What the hell are you talking about? What are you?
Speaker 1: I still my love at bit Valentine's Day?
Speaker 7: Boy?
Speaker 1: If you cock this one up, be coming at your
Speaker 1: heart today. Today is the day where post Valentine's Day
Speaker 1: see breakups and of course the divorce train. A lot
Speaker 1: of divorces happening in the next couple of weeks because
Speaker 1: you cocked ub Valentine's Day. I do that kind of it.
Speaker 1: I often don't do just straight up book authors, but
Speaker 1: this one caught my attention. Is a he's a divorce
Speaker 1: attorney's don like thousands of divorce cases and says, you
Speaker 1: know what, maybe I'll use this power of evil for
Speaker 1: good and switch to the bright side rather than the
Speaker 1: dark side. And uh, you call it the ten Commands
Speaker 1: of Marriage Secrets of a Divorce Lawyer, which I think
Speaker 1: is a great idea of who knows better about staying
Speaker 1: together than the divorce lawyer. Congratulations, David Erdaman.
Speaker 2: This is brilliant.
Speaker 6: Well, thank you, Scott. It's a pleasure to be on
Speaker 6: the big One this morning. Cincinnati is one of my
Speaker 6: favorite cities. Pleasure to speak with you.
Speaker 2: Thank you appreciate it. Where are you from now? Where
Speaker 2: you live now?
Speaker 6: Well, I live in the other Queen city, Charlotte, North Carolina.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, beautiful area of the country. We hopefully will
Speaker 1: be able to travel again soon and exchange. But so
Speaker 1: in this area, this is interesting. So you're like slitting
Speaker 1: your own throat, aren't you, Scott.
Speaker 6: The truth of the matter is, lawyers are sworn to
Speaker 6: help their clients' best interests, and we really are. I
Speaker 6: give credit to even my imposing lawyers for that. But
Speaker 6: the best interest of many of these clients, in fact,
Speaker 6: is to work on saving their marriage. And I'm not
Speaker 6: I don't try to lead them, I try to follow them.
Speaker 6: But when you think about it, in a divorce, there's
Speaker 6: a possibility that only one of the people wants to divorce,
Speaker 6: and the other one might be the one coming to
Speaker 6: see me. So that person wants to save her marriage
Speaker 6: or his marriage. And I've sworn myself throughout my career
Speaker 6: to try to help people who want to save their
Speaker 6: marriage to do so.
Speaker 1: All right, So what do you typically see number one
Speaker 1: cause for divorce? Is it infidelity or money?
Speaker 6: Money is the biggest problem for young couples, but infidelity
Speaker 6: and addiction are the two big problems that I see
Speaker 6: lightelong in marriages, and addiction gets to be a larger
Speaker 6: problem as people get older.
Speaker 1: And probably that are right, So money when you're younger,
Speaker 1: infidelity probably in your middle aged years, and then addiction
Speaker 1: in the later stages of the marriage, Am I right?
Speaker 5: Yes?
Speaker 6: Yes? In generalities, yeah.
Speaker 2: Okay, you can almost break it up in age groups.
Speaker 6: Then in that case, well, it's shocking to me. What
Speaker 6: a I'm not against people having a drink of alcohol,
Speaker 6: but the scourge of alcoholism is more widespread than the
Speaker 6: average person might imagine unless they're living it and.
Speaker 1: They're yeah, I have friends that fall into that category
Speaker 1: of the divorce because a spouse got into that or
Speaker 1: other things.
Speaker 2: And yeah, I totally could see that.
Speaker 1: We tend to older, We get, we get, I mean
Speaker 1: to guess, Well, let's start at the beginning here. Let's
Speaker 1: let's rewind, David, we got so, you got some time,
Speaker 1: I got some time here. You don't charge by the
Speaker 1: you don't charge by the minute. Do you You know one
Speaker 1: of those.
Speaker 6: Attorneys of the first call is always.
Speaker 2: All right, it's contingency.
Speaker 1: I like that, So so counselor we'll start with you.
Speaker 1: You know, okay, So you're married, in your twenties, your thirties,
Speaker 1: you're just starting out. You've got college loans maybe or
Speaker 1: maybe just you know, you're working jobs, multiple jobs, you
Speaker 1: never see each other. Money's tight, You're going to break
Speaker 1: up over money? Why why would you split up over money?
Speaker 1: Why would you go in separate directions?
Speaker 3: Is it?
Speaker 1: Or is it because one spouse has different spending habits
Speaker 1: in the other.
Speaker 6: Well, by the way, I don't know that you ask
Speaker 6: what the biggest problem is. Money is the biggest challenge,
Speaker 6: and ideally they overcome that challenge. But yes, indeed, when
Speaker 6: people are single, when I was single, when you were single,
Speaker 6: when any of your listeners are single, they can live
Speaker 6: their life and spend their money the way they want.
Speaker 6: But when they get into a partnership called the marriage,
Speaker 6: then how they spend their money affects both people, and
Speaker 6: so it's a relearning process to think together about planning
Speaker 6: a life and planning the finances.
Speaker 1: And I think that's an important thing is you typically
Speaker 1: would see a couple come together and maybe let's say
Speaker 1: she has her sense about her financially in getting a
Speaker 1: relationship with a guy who maybe has some past debt,
Speaker 1: bad credit, that sort of thing. What do you recommend
Speaker 1: when you're first getting together, you get engaged if it's
Speaker 1: and that's probably typical. Right, one is a good saver
Speaker 1: and maybe has a good monetary fiscal policy, and another
Speaker 1: one not so much.
Speaker 2: What do you recommend a couple like that?
Speaker 6: Well, number one, you're exactly right. You'd be surprised how
Speaker 6: much of undisclosed debt comes into early marriages. But the answer,
Speaker 6: of course is communication, and the answer is truthfulness. And
Speaker 6: a marriage is off to a bad start if the
Speaker 6: couple has not been able to communicate openly with each
Speaker 6: other about who the a are. A longer engagement might
Speaker 6: be a good idea. Getting to know this person in
Speaker 6: all dimensions is always a good idea.
Speaker 1: So let's say, if it's your kid, your son, or
Speaker 1: your daughter, they're engaged, background checked, how do you find
Speaker 1: out about the real find because that happens right you
Speaker 1: all of a sudden, Hey we're married. Oh, by the way,
Speaker 1: I didn't tell you. I've had three bankruptcies nowadays.
Speaker 6: By the way, I have two grown daughters. They're both
Speaker 6: very happily married and have done wonderfully in their choice
Speaker 6: of spouses. But nowadays I hear many parents of that
Speaker 6: that would be the would be grandparents, the parents of
Speaker 6: a daughter or son getting married, paying for their own
Speaker 6: private investigative report to find out about the person that
Speaker 6: their son or daughter is marrying. Yes, I'm seeing that
Speaker 6: a lot these days.
Speaker 2: Very interesting. Yeah, But you know, I mean there's another
Speaker 2: thing too.
Speaker 1: Now, Graham and Grepp are going to pull a you know,
Speaker 1: hire a p I or somebody to follow his kid
Speaker 1: or around. And then you find out something that may
Speaker 1: be a little on savory. How do you present that
Speaker 1: to your kid without reckoning a relations because that looks
Speaker 1: like you're trying to split them up. And now you're
Speaker 1: gonna put you're gonna put your relationship with your kids
Speaker 1: in jeopardy.
Speaker 6: Oh, you're exactly right. And uh. And parents have to
Speaker 6: trust their adult children to make good decisions. But parents
Speaker 6: should always feel that they have license to give advice.
Speaker 6: And there you know, there was an old soul song
Speaker 6: that said, take time to know her. I don't remember
Speaker 6: who sang that one, but take time to know him,
Speaker 6: take time to know her. I'm not a big advocate
Speaker 6: for the private investigator, and I'm very much not a
Speaker 6: big advocate for meddling parents. But I am a big
Speaker 6: advocate for a would be engaged person to make sure
Speaker 6: they know who they are marrying and whatever degree of
Speaker 6: assurances they need. If it requires private investigator, at least
Speaker 6: a Facebook search, my goodness, they ought to do that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, how about this, If you've got the means,
Speaker 1: hire an investigator for him, hire an investigator for her,
Speaker 1: and then just have an exchange notes, I got nothing
Speaker 1: to hide, and then that takes this thing off it right.
Speaker 6: Well, well there's a problem there. The problem is that
Speaker 6: that introduces i'll call it a poison in the relationship.
Speaker 6: It's the it's the it's it's both. It's both. It's
Speaker 6: both encouraging of trust because you say, okay, I know
Speaker 6: all about you, but it's also infecting the relationship with
Speaker 6: suspicion and mistrust. And and I like to say in
Speaker 6: the book, you know, my book's called Secrets of a
Speaker 6: Divorce Lawyer. Uh, the Ten Commandments of Marriage. I I
Speaker 6: say that the person to whom one marries is the
Speaker 6: person they must ultimately trust more than any other person
Speaker 6: on the globe. And so they've got to build trust.
Speaker 6: The best way, of course, is for a person to
Speaker 6: be self disclosing about their background. If they've got three bankruptcies,
Speaker 6: tell the person to get honest.
Speaker 2: If it comes.
Speaker 1: Well, here's the thing she asked her. He asked to
Speaker 1: trust depending on where your kid is. But guess what,
Speaker 1: I'm the father. I don't trust.
Speaker 6: Anybody, and many and many fathers do not.
Speaker 2: And that's my job. My job is to not trust anybody.
Speaker 6: Well, and and and that's right. But I say, if
Speaker 6: you have a son or a daughter, let's say.
Speaker 1: You have a daughter, I don't trust them either.
Speaker 6: All right, Well, then then then don't marry them.
Speaker 1: Advice.
Speaker 6: But the persons who are getting married must trust each other, because,
Speaker 6: as I says in the book, after a year of marriage,
Speaker 6: a person should closer to their spouse, and their spouse
Speaker 6: should know them better than their parents would, than their
Speaker 6: siblings do, than their best friends do, because they know
Speaker 6: everything about the person after a year.
Speaker 1: Gotcha, all right? So who better than a divorcelader advised
Speaker 1: people to stay married. David Edmud's an attorney. He wrote
Speaker 1: The Secrets of a Divorce loader all the stuff he sees.
Speaker 1: You put the book and said, well, if you read this,
Speaker 1: then everything you need to know about having a happy
Speaker 1: marriage is standing together is right here. It's brilliant, actually,
Speaker 1: if you think about it. So we move from the
Speaker 1: younger ages, where it's money real quick here to the
Speaker 1: infidelity of the middle years, the proverbial seven year itches
Speaker 1: they used to call it, right, which is right near
Speaker 1: what thirties forties probably.
Speaker 6: People. I saw a note just this past week of
Speaker 6: somebody turning forty and how how cataclysmic it was to
Speaker 6: this individual to be turning forty. It was a woman,
Speaker 6: and it makes people every decade at least makes people
Speaker 6: look at their lives and say, am I on track
Speaker 6: for where I want to be? I look at it
Speaker 6: differently when they come into my office. I look at
Speaker 6: it and say, well, let's just let's make sure we
Speaker 6: understand what's good about your relationship. Because they may have
Speaker 6: a nice home, great kids, everything about their life is good,
Speaker 6: but they're feeling, to use your phrase, itchy about their spouse. Well,
Speaker 6: is there a behavior or two or three that their
Speaker 6: spouse needs to change? I think that in many cases,
Speaker 6: ninety five percent of what people have in their marriages
Speaker 6: is satisfactory to them, and it's the five percent that
Speaker 6: makes them look elsewhere. And that's not why, because chances
Speaker 6: are the next marriage they may only be eighty five
Speaker 6: percent satisfied and find fifteen.
Speaker 3: Percent problem with.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that's also part of it. Right, grass is greener,
Speaker 1: and you also get like, man, what happened to my life?
Speaker 1: I used to be carefree and young, and I'm settling.
Speaker 1: I'm settling. Right?
Speaker 2: Is that the biggest thing for.
Speaker 1: Men and women when they act unfaithful. Is that it's
Speaker 1: it's like they're trying to get control their life back.
Speaker 6: Let me think about that. In my book, I write
Speaker 6: what I have learned as a as a secret of
Speaker 6: a divorce lawyer, and that is this generalization applies about
Speaker 6: fifty percent of the time. And that is, if a
Speaker 6: female is having an extra matter affair, fifty percent of
Speaker 6: the time it will be with her supervisor, her boss.
Speaker 6: With a man, there is no such correlation. You would
Speaker 6: think that the reciprocal would be true. Okay, If fifty
Speaker 6: percent of women who are having affairs are having with
Speaker 6: their bosses supervisors, then theoretically fifty percent of men should
Speaker 6: be having them with their direct reports. But it doesn't
Speaker 6: work out that way. Men are looking more widely. Women
Speaker 6: come to trust their bosses by working together all day.
Speaker 6: I talk a lot about that because it is not
Speaker 6: a problem in marriages at large. I don't want anybody
Speaker 6: to be afraid of work. I don't want a woman
Speaker 6: to be afraid of working for a man. But when
Speaker 6: there are problems in the marriage, that's when they come
Speaker 6: to see a divorce lawyer. It's often the woman's boss,
Speaker 6: and so that's that's and that's that has all sorts
Speaker 6: of ramification.
Speaker 1: Yeah, psychologically, Yeah, how do I get the psychological elemnus
Speaker 1: because I don't want to. So we've gone from money
Speaker 1: to the infidel in the middle aged thing and then
Speaker 1: the interesting one to me what you said. What you're
Speaker 1: saying in the Secrets of a Divorce Lawyer, David Erdman
Speaker 1: is for older people. And what age group we're talking
Speaker 1: here when it comes to addiction is being the number
Speaker 1: one cause of divorce among older couples.
Speaker 6: Here's here's what happens in my book. That's in the book,
Speaker 6: and it's called The Ten Commandments of Marriage. I talk
Speaker 6: about the role of addiction and I look at it
Speaker 6: as a fork in the road. Let me let me
Speaker 6: go back just a little bit of life history. When
Speaker 6: you go up through your twenties, chances are you're a
Speaker 6: heavy consumer of alcohol. But between age thirty and forty,
Speaker 6: that's when you start having children and you better get
Speaker 6: control of alcohol or alcohol is going to control you.
Speaker 6: By the time people are forty, they're a percentage maybe
Speaker 6: ten percent, maybe less than ten percent are hooked on
Speaker 6: alcohol and it can be drugs, and so then matters
Speaker 6: begin to deteriorate in the marriage because because it's not
Speaker 6: usually a health concern until an older issue, but it's
Speaker 6: a financial concern. It's an anger problem in the marriage.
Speaker 6: It's a conflict over the one spouse saying you drink
Speaker 6: too much and the other saying I do not. Well,
Speaker 6: they've got a problem. And the person who's drinking too
Speaker 6: much may be going out and corrousing with other people
Speaker 6: because they're not having fun at home anymore. They're not
Speaker 6: even welcome at home anymore, and then that problem stix
Speaker 6: with them, and it is a It is a as
Speaker 6: a young person, I would never have imagined how pandemic
Speaker 6: it is in old age.
Speaker 2: Wow. And uh, it's part of that too though.
Speaker 1: I Mean, you get older, you get you know, aches
Speaker 1: and pains, and you start maybe on a prescription thing
Speaker 1: and maybe you self medicate to with alcohol. You got time,
Speaker 1: you got money, you start doing that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: You're you're also an empty nester, right, how much does
Speaker 1: that affect a breakup of a marriage? Because you know,
Speaker 1: for years and years, especially today, you know suburbanites, you
Speaker 1: know young parents, it's all about the kids, the kids,
Speaker 1: the kids, and sports and music and this and that.
Speaker 1: In this camp and you're driving all over hells over
Speaker 1: and then they grow up. Okay, we got them in
Speaker 1: a great college, and they they leave and now you
Speaker 1: have you're living with a stranger.
Speaker 6: Uh, Scott. I definitely address that in the book. If
Speaker 6: the couple has not made their marriage the core of
Speaker 6: their existence together and instead have made the children the
Speaker 6: core of it, or perhaps their career the core of it,
Speaker 6: then they really don't have a central focus any longer
Speaker 6: in their marriage, and and things tend to spend apart.
Speaker 6: One of my commandments is to live a marriage centered life.
Speaker 6: That sounds difficult, but the truth matter is if the
Speaker 6: marriage is at the center of your life, where is it.
Speaker 6: It's somewhere else. And that in terms of looking at
Speaker 6: the demography that what happens with marriages. Once people are
Speaker 6: centered somewhere else, then their marriage is definitely a subject
Speaker 6: of being lost in the process.
Speaker 2: David Herdman, all the best to you, thanks again for
Speaker 2: coming on the show.
Speaker 6: Thank you brother.
Speaker 1: A nice uplifting topic for a couple of days past
Speaker 1: out since day. If you really screwed up Valandide's day,
Speaker 1: you may need the book and the advice of sound
Speaker 1: legal counsel because the next month or so, a couple
Speaker 1: of weeks at least, attorneys start to see a huge
Speaker 1: up to the number divorce.
Speaker 2: I mean, think about it.
Speaker 1: You made it through of cold winter monthster together, you
Speaker 1: realize how much you hate each other, and then you
Speaker 1: suffer through the holidays and maybe made it to Valentine's Day.
Speaker 1: Of course it's more of a I guess, probably more
Speaker 1: of a couple thing, not you know, maybe you're engaged
Speaker 1: or have been dating a while, or dating the breakups
Speaker 1: happened to post Valentine's Day. But we do see a
Speaker 1: spike in the number of divorces as well this divorce
Speaker 1: season ahead of baseball season, which, by the way, we
Speaker 1: begin today in ernest because our buddy Dave D. R.
Speaker 2: Brewster.
Speaker 1: This first update from spring training heard here on seven
Speaker 1: hundred WLW.
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Sloane. Remember your kid.
Speaker 1: You go to class and classes starting to fall here,
Speaker 1: and you make some new friends and probably keep maybe
Speaker 1: one a couple of those things through the next year,
Speaker 1: and you make different frame your friend circle expands and
Speaker 1: you move away. Maybe you go to school, right, you
Speaker 1: make more friends there and now with Facebook and everything
Speaker 1: now on Facebook is even old school right, you've talked
Speaker 1: about Twitter and Instagram and TikTok and all that you
Speaker 1: can keep tabs on your friends you haven't seen in
Speaker 1: a long time. Why is it so much harder to
Speaker 1: make friends though, when you're an adult? I mean, think
Speaker 1: about it. For a lot of folks they keep, especially Cincinnati, right,
Speaker 1: as parochial as we are, tend to keep a lot
Speaker 1: of the same friends you had your whole life. But
Speaker 1: making new friends is difficult. Why is it so hard
Speaker 1: for adults? Interesting question? Merca Franco is here, she is
Speaker 1: an expert on these step of relationships, and I think
Speaker 1: that's the most valid question of our time.
Speaker 2: It's easy when your kid. Why is it so hard
Speaker 2: winning an adult? Marissa?
Speaker 11: So when we're kids, we have what Rebecca g Adams
Speaker 11: of Sociologists calls the ingredients that allow friendships happen organically,
Speaker 11: which are continuous, unplanned interaction and shared vulnerability. So we
Speaker 11: see people every day and we let our guard down,
Speaker 11: lunch reset in. But as adults, we don't have the
Speaker 11: same infrastructure, so we can't assume that friendships happened organically
Speaker 11: in the same way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you see people at work, people come and go,
Speaker 1: stuff like that people you work next to in you know,
Speaker 1: cubicle or the drill press next to you, or on
Speaker 1: the job, whatever it is. It seems like there's it
Speaker 1: just seems like there's more opportunities when you're alt because
Speaker 1: you know, you have the one thing you don't when
Speaker 1: you're kid, and that's ability to travel yourself.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 1: You can get in a car, go for a walk
Speaker 1: wherever you want to go. You make more contacts a
Speaker 1: day than the typical kid does.
Speaker 11: Yeah, that's a great point. A study actually found though,
Speaker 11: that the more time we spent together at work, the
Speaker 11: less closely feel. And I think that's because for a
Speaker 11: lot of us in the workplace, that sense of vulnerability,
Speaker 11: the unguarded net that was part of the ingredients for
Speaker 11: connection isn't necessarily there. We share just a certain side
Speaker 11: of us. We don't share the full dimensions of who
Speaker 11: we are, and so we might feel like I know
Speaker 11: you as an employee, but I don't necessarily know you
Speaker 11: as a person.
Speaker 1: We have an interesting phenomenon here in Cincinnati, Ohio, doctor,
Speaker 1: in that we have the East side on the West
Speaker 1: side here, and there's a noticeable difference between the two
Speaker 1: west Siders tend to be people who grew up in
Speaker 1: the same and I'm stereotyping here, but grew up in
Speaker 1: the same neighborhood, when's the same high school, you know,
Speaker 1: lifelong friends kind of like America used to be a
Speaker 1: couple generations ago, generation or two ago, and it's kind
Speaker 1: of that way, and it's quite and it's nice. But
Speaker 1: I think from those I've known and met perfectly, you know,
Speaker 1: wonderful folks and stuff, but there's a sense that you know,
Speaker 1: if you didn't grow up in that particular neighborhood or
Speaker 1: you're not part of that group, it's awfully tough to
Speaker 1: break through. And yeah, some cities and areas are easier,
Speaker 1: like at the East side of Cincinnata to do that.
Speaker 1: It's an interesting phenomenon here, but I would suspect that's
Speaker 1: probably true in a lot of areas.
Speaker 11: Yeah, that is a really interesting phenomenon. And I like
Speaker 11: how you put it, like similar to generations path because
Speaker 11: it's true people used to live in the same neighborhoods
Speaker 11: and areas their whole life, and that really facilitated connection.
Speaker 11: Because one study found that the more you move, the
Speaker 11: more dispose mold. Basically, your relationships become so people that
Speaker 11: have the same area that haven't continuous interactions really have
Speaker 11: that opportunity to relationships. And I don't think, you know,
Speaker 11: Cincinnati is the only place in the US that has that.
Speaker 11: I think there can be a sort of wide range
Speaker 11: of experiences when it comes to making friends, depending on
Speaker 11: your reasons.
Speaker 3: Certainly, you know you have.
Speaker 1: Your same social circle. Maybe people come and go, but
Speaker 1: generally not making as many friends as you did when
Speaker 1: you were younger and lifelong friends at that People retire
Speaker 1: and move and then all of a sudden they're back
Speaker 1: to being kids again, making all brand new friends.
Speaker 11: Yeah. Yeah, And that is actually one of the things
Speaker 11: that predicts how satisfied we are in our retirement, whether
Speaker 11: we replace the social network we might have gotten from
Speaker 11: working every day. I mean, I think when we're in retirement, right,
Speaker 11: people in general and times of transition tend to be
Speaker 11: more open to friendship. So that's retiring, moving to a
Speaker 11: new city, you know, going through a breakup or divor
Speaker 11: traveling for example. And it gives us a lot more time.
Speaker 11: And obviously time is a big factor that we need
Speaker 11: to be able to make friends. Just being able to
Speaker 11: have the ability to interact more frequently will really up
Speaker 11: our chances of forming connection.
Speaker 2: How do you do this then?
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, if you're going, Okay, this sounds good,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm going to go and I'm going to try
Speaker 1: and to expand my friend base right now, how do
Speaker 1: you go out and find that?
Speaker 11: Yeah, So, as I talked about it platonics, you have
Speaker 11: to initiate. Friendships doesn't really happen organically. As adults, people
Speaker 11: that think friendship happens based on luck are lonelier over time,
Speaker 11: whereas those that think it happens based on effort are
Speaker 11: less lonely. Now, people are very afraid of rejections. The
Speaker 11: truth is, according to the research, people are less likely
Speaker 11: to reject you than you think. When strangers interact and
Speaker 11: predict how how much they think the other person likes them,
Speaker 11: we tend to underestimate how much people like us. It's
Speaker 11: called the liking gap. And one of my biggest tips
Speaker 11: for making friends that I talk about in Platonics is
Speaker 11: the importance of assuming people like you so you can initiate.
Speaker 11: Because when researchers basically manipulated people to think that way,
Speaker 11: even though it was a lie, people became more more
Speaker 11: friendly or more open and they actually, you know, put
Speaker 11: themselves in a place to be more likely to make friends.
Speaker 11: So it becomes a sort of self fulfilling prophecy. And
Speaker 11: after you do all that, you just say to someone
Speaker 11: and you'd like to hang out with more, like, Hey,
Speaker 11: it's been great to connect because you take topic information
Speaker 11: like I'd love to find more time to hang out.
Speaker 1: We'll have to talk again later and go through the
Speaker 1: whole friend zone thing too, because we're just talking about
Speaker 1: you generally a friend relationships, platonic relationships. Name of the
Speaker 1: book is platonic, but it's a whole thing when you start,
Speaker 1: you know, mixing romantic interests in here in your you know,
Speaker 1: there's friend zone and everything else. Maybe there's a I
Speaker 1: don't know, maybe there's a follow up to this, Doctor
Speaker 1: Mersa Franco, thanks again for the time.
Speaker 11: Appreciate it, no problem, my pleasure.
Speaker 1: Thanks again. And I just I just thought of this
Speaker 1: as I hung up. And I think it's because too,
Speaker 1: when you're younger, you don't have the demands on your
Speaker 1: time as much as you do when your adult. Right,
Speaker 1: you've got everything pulling at you all the time. It
Speaker 1: feels like the older you get, the last time you have,
Speaker 1: and there's so many demands for your time. You like
Speaker 1: to and sit down and talk to someone and get
Speaker 1: to know them, but do you really have that time
Speaker 1: or inclination to do it. And also, I think your
Speaker 1: BS meter is kind of worn a little bit thin
Speaker 1: over the years too, and maybe that's a little tiring
Speaker 1: for some folks. I guess I'm always open to meeting different,
Speaker 1: you know, new people and different things and experiences. I'm
Speaker 1: cool with that still, I get that a lot of
Speaker 1: people aren't. But relative to why it's easier when you're
Speaker 1: younger and older, I think that's it right there, is
Speaker 1: that there's so many constraints for our time. And that's why
Speaker 1: when you retire, and let's say, you know, if you're
Speaker 1: a Cincinnati and right, you're going to retire and you're
Speaker 1: only allowed to move go to different play you're only
Speaker 1: allowed to go like Gallaton, Kentucky. You're allowed to go
Speaker 1: to I'm sorry, Pigeon Forge, the Outer Banks or Destined Florida,
Speaker 1: and that's pretty much it right there, or the Gulf
Speaker 1: side of Florida, maybe the Fort Myers. And once you
Speaker 1: do that, though, you now, okay, I don't have demands
Speaker 1: of my time anymore. You may start making friends again.
Speaker 1: Like your kid. I think it's work, I think it's life,
Speaker 1: I think it's family. It's all those things that weighs
Speaker 1: down there. That's why it's hard to make friends when
Speaker 1: you're an adult, because you just you want to, but
Speaker 1: you don't have the time.
Speaker 2: You got a lot going on.
Speaker 1: This is seven hundred WW and news in about twelve
Speaker 1: minutes here on the show and the big stories today.
Speaker 1: Looks like crime over the first couple months of the
Speaker 1: new year here in Cincinnati has gone up forty percent,
Speaker 1: which is insane considering how cold it's been since literally
Speaker 1: the first.
Speaker 2: Of the year.
Speaker 1: You've got to work really really hard to get those
Speaker 1: crime numbers where they are with the weather the way
Speaker 1: it's been. We'll try to make sense of that, probably
Speaker 1: something on tomorrow's show on that. We also have the
Speaker 1: guy in uh whereas a Georgia who gave his son
Speaker 1: a gun went on a shooting spree and mass murder
Speaker 1: and his high school and is responsible. Now he has
Speaker 1: his day in court today, which I think is a
Speaker 1: fascinating Second Amendment story in that you've got it responsible,
Speaker 1: you give the you give a weapon to someone who
Speaker 1: is under the underage. You own that bullet as much
Speaker 1: as that individual does, as my mother, son or daughter does.
Speaker 1: So we just whether it's unlocked guns or guns in
Speaker 1: the hands of the wrong people, especially kids. As a
Speaker 1: pro Secondmendment guy myself, I totally see what it is
Speaker 1: they're doing and trying to do here, and you should.
Speaker 1: You've got to be responsible, much more responsible. Also, a
Speaker 1: Chicago area teacher forced to resign over his Facebook post
Speaker 1: two words that cost him his job.
Speaker 2: Go ice is what he said.
Speaker 1: He has worked for a decade and a half building
Speaker 1: his career in in an area in Gary where there
Speaker 1: is a predominant Hispanic population. Therefore, the he has a
Speaker 1: disproportion number kids in his classes that a Hispanic.
Speaker 2: And so he said, go ice.
Speaker 1: And of course, you know, someone caught that and then
Speaker 1: shared it, and then they shared it and it went viral,
Speaker 1: and yeah, it's an area where the local police.
Speaker 2: Said they would cooperate with ice.
Speaker 1: So he recently put up a Facebook post that I've
Speaker 1: spent fourteen years building my career, pouring my heart into
Speaker 1: teaching kids, building relationships and building a positive role as
Speaker 1: opposive role model. To see it up ended over two
Speaker 1: simple words, go Ice, where I expressed my personal support
Speaker 1: for law enforcement felt like a severe blow to my career.
Speaker 1: And now, of course, if you're anti ICE, you think
Speaker 1: this is just desserts. If you support ICE and all
Speaker 1: that they do unequivocally, then you are defending this guy.
Speaker 1: So he will be and now has become a darling
Speaker 1: of the right, So he's been claimed into that circle.
Speaker 2: Might have been all law, but who knows. And I
Speaker 2: think it's interesting.
Speaker 1: You know, we talk about cancel culture and it's more
Speaker 1: kind of past cancel culture, and it still comes up.
Speaker 1: We had what happened with, you know, the campus canceled
Speaker 1: culture over the last several years that seems to be fading.
Speaker 1: We had what happened with that Joe Rogan and Spotify
Speaker 1: where boycotted over his perceived anti vaccine stance, and the
Speaker 1: guy from The Bachelor a few years ago cost him.
Speaker 1: Of course, on the you know, on the left, you've
Speaker 1: had conservative led cancelations and that included Dylan mulvaney in
Speaker 1: the bud Light thing, what happened with Target and the
Speaker 1: Pride Collection, and Liz Cheney for that matter too, where
Speaker 1: she was removed from the House GOP leadership and censured
Speaker 1: by the Republicans for voting to impeach Trump and criticizing
Speaker 1: his false election claims and lost her primary by landslide
Speaker 1: or Trump backed challenger. And so you know, this past year,
Speaker 1: as we still fairly new year, anyway, it feels like
Speaker 1: this is emerging. It's starting to the warmest starting tournoways changes.
Speaker 1: This is the year of uncancelation. And I think what's
Speaker 1: going on is if you look at Trump, right, the
Speaker 1: latest controversy, although he may have done something today, seems
Speaker 1: like every day he does something. The Obama video that
Speaker 1: came out with Michelle and Barack Obama and Barack Obamas
Speaker 1: come out on a podcast and kind of gone after
Speaker 1: the president on this. You'll blame the guy in him saying, hey,
Speaker 1: it was first it was a White House intern, or now,
Speaker 1: well I didn't watch the whole video. Okay, well you're
Speaker 1: having a you know, the face of Michelle Obama and
Speaker 1: President Obama super imposed on primates is certainly going to
Speaker 1: cause a lot of people to question whether or not
Speaker 1: you're a racist. If you think he's a racist, this
Speaker 1: just gives you more ammunition, right, and mean, it's a
Speaker 1: horrible thing. You can't to go I wasn't my fight
Speaker 1: and watch the whole thing. It's not hard to say
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. But today, and this is the uncancellation part
Speaker 1: of it, you don't have to do that anymore because
Speaker 1: now today you have this loyal base and the bass
Speaker 1: has become more significant than broad appeal. So Trump's political success,
Speaker 1: if you look at it, demonstrates at a strong base
Speaker 1: can help you survive cancelation attempts. That makes sense because
Speaker 1: his core core base they don't care, you know, they're
Speaker 1: and I think also we are fatigued with the constant
Speaker 1: outrage cycle. And that's part of why this past year
Speaker 1: politically has felt like ten because the constant outrage. It's
Speaker 1: like we have outrage PTSD. You do, I do, everyone does.
Speaker 1: And that's what that feels like. And even the corporate
Speaker 1: anti wold cancelations aren't really sticky. You know, Anheuser Busch
Speaker 1: and Target saw minimal long term damage with our campaigns.
Speaker 1: They go, Okay, we can survive this. So it's really
Speaker 1: shifted towards I'm glad to see this more to an
Speaker 1: accountability culture. The cancel culture is transferring from this either
Speaker 1: your platform or deplatformed this whole binary model into more
Speaker 1: kind of a nuanced system. Okay, did you say or
Speaker 1: do something stupid? We had just what was an HGTV host.
Speaker 1: I don't watch those shows because they dre'd be crazy.
Speaker 1: And she I think she's forty nine and she just
Speaker 1: got canceled. Technically, well, I don't cancel, but she dropped
Speaker 1: the end bomb like in an outtake, and they told her.
Speaker 1: She's like, oh my god, I can't believe I said that.
Speaker 1: Those words don't come out of my mouth. Well they do.
Speaker 1: They did, and it was caught on tape and she
Speaker 1: wanted the I guess in this case the photographers to
Speaker 1: delete that, and someone said this is interesting and made
Speaker 1: a complainte HGTV cut not only they're just ready to
Speaker 1: leach I guess her new season. They canceled that, They
Speaker 1: pulled all her episodes off, they took everything off social
Speaker 1: She has disappeared because at the end, Bob now today
Speaker 1: you know, and this may be the Tom Brenneman effect,
Speaker 1: you know, I mean to look what Tom said and
Speaker 1: did and paid a heavy price for that for four
Speaker 1: or five years, but he was able to reabilitate himself
Speaker 1: and say, listen, Okay, I get the air of my
Speaker 1: ways and now was embraced by the same community he
Speaker 1: offended years ago. I mean, that's that's the way society
Speaker 1: should be. You're held accountable, you pay a price. Some
Speaker 1: say too long. I would agree with that, but there's
Speaker 1: got a price to pay, and you did that, and
Speaker 1: you're rehabilitating to move forward. And I think maybe today
Speaker 1: we're finally seeing the light with us where we want
Speaker 1: to see public public figures learn and demonstrate growth and
Speaker 1: not just be permanently killed in banned. To this point,
Speaker 1: I saw YouTube and acts are adding what they call
Speaker 1: rehabilitation notes to controversial content so you can address past
Speaker 1: controversies to present so you can head it off with
Speaker 1: the past or accountability audits or whatever they call it.
Speaker 1: And there's a clear line between what's cancelable or criminal behavior.
Speaker 1: Certainly that's that's a different But yeah, we're in this
Speaker 1: state right now. We're being offended is our default setting.
Speaker 1: And maybe we're going in and changing that button bar,
Speaker 1: maybe we're changing that little radio button a little bit,
Speaker 1: and you know, people, because that just adds more censorship
Speaker 1: to the mix too as well. And this day and
Speaker 1: age of bountiful communication. It's kind of scary that, you know,
Speaker 1: we're our default setting is just, hey, let's not rock
Speaker 1: the boat. Let's not be offended here, because yeah, I
Speaker 1: thought with social media, the one thing there is if
Speaker 1: you just let the truth come out, Uh, that seems
Speaker 1: to always win. Now again you're saying, well, slonely, there's AI,
Speaker 1: there's a bunch of other things and manipulating what truth
Speaker 1: looks like, and truth now is debatable, it's in the
Speaker 1: ie beholder. It's kind of always has been, though this
Speaker 1: is just a digital extension of it. I think I
Speaker 1: think we're just we're tired. We're just exhausted of being
Speaker 1: offended all the time. And as kind of as predicted
Speaker 1: back in the day when the whole you know, left
Speaker 1: wing cancel culture which started this whole thing, I said,
Speaker 1: you know this, at some point there's gonna be a
Speaker 1: right wing cancel culture, and sure enough it happened. Because
Speaker 1: we have this political polarization in the United States that
Speaker 1: it feels like it's peak.
Speaker 2: I don't know if it is or not. We'll find out.
Speaker 1: And and you're seeing I think as a result of this,
Speaker 1: the percentage of Americans identifying is moderate is now hit
Speaker 1: a record low about a third of the country. Doesn't
Speaker 1: mean independent voters, that's a whole different thing, but people
Speaker 1: who consider themselves moderates, and the cultural right now demands
Speaker 1: public attention for cancelation. Previously it was the left with
Speaker 1: me too and Black Lives Matter and all these things,
Speaker 1: and it's kind of dangerous. And maybe that's also why
Speaker 1: you see the number of students, younger people in America
Speaker 1: gen zers saying it was acceptable to use violence to
Speaker 1: stop someone you disagree from speaking. It was something like
Speaker 1: one in three now last year. That's an alarming number
Speaker 1: thinking that you should use violence aka Charlie Kirk to
Speaker 1: stop someone you disagree with. Absolutely frightening, but I think
Speaker 1: maybe you know, it just becomes permanent but less dramatic,
Speaker 1: and I think the rehabilitation culture eventually wins, at least
Speaker 1: that that's my hope.
Speaker 2: Anyway, we jump in with
Speaker 1: News and more to follow with Willie at twelve six
Speaker 1: today here on the hull of the Red seven hundred
Speaker 1: WW Cincinnati,