WEBVTT - Marrying the First Person

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<v Speaker 1>Mojo in the morning.

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<v Speaker 2>Phone numbers eight four to forur Mojoe Live, text is

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<v Speaker 2>ninety five five zero zero. If you relate to whatever

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<v Speaker 2>we're talking about, or you got to comment on a

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<v Speaker 2>War of the Roses second date update, anything that we

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<v Speaker 2>do on the show. You can always text call me

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<v Speaker 2>and Lydia will call you. So this story, when you

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<v Speaker 2>told us the story in our pre show meeting, it

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<v Speaker 2>was funny because you were like, wait a second, this

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<v Speaker 2>is kind of a backhanded at me, what's the full story?

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<v Speaker 1>Show?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, so I ran into a woman that I haven't

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<v Speaker 3>seen in a while, and so we were just catching

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<v Speaker 3>up on life and kids and work, you know, all

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<v Speaker 3>the things. And the last time I saw her, I

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<v Speaker 3>knew she was going through a divorce. And so now

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<v Speaker 3>that divorce has been finalized, she said, for about eighteen months, and.

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<v Speaker 4>She's dating somebody new.

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<v Speaker 3>She's been dating him since the holiday, so like a

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<v Speaker 3>month and a half, two months, and she's like, and

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<v Speaker 3>we are getting married.

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<v Speaker 4>We are in love.

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<v Speaker 3>We just know he loves my kids. We are getting married.

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<v Speaker 4>And she's like, ecuse me, She's like, everybody thinks.

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<v Speaker 3>That I'm crazy because he's the first guy that i've

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<v Speaker 3>dated post divorce, and she's like, do you think that

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<v Speaker 3>I'm crazy? And I said, wow, as a matter of fact,

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<v Speaker 3>that was me too. Wes was my first and last

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<v Speaker 3>day after I got divorced, and everyone thought that I

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<v Speaker 3>was crazy for not dating more before settling down and

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<v Speaker 3>getting married again for the second time. So I just

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<v Speaker 3>know that a lot of people have so many thoughts

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<v Speaker 3>on this, and I also want to find somebody like,

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<v Speaker 3>is there anybody listening who has only ever dated the

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<v Speaker 3>person they're married to?

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<v Speaker 1>Interesting? Why did you only go one to day with Wes?

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<v Speaker 4>Well, I Mojo can attest to this.

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<v Speaker 3>It took me a really long time to even be

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<v Speaker 3>in a space of wanting to date in general. And

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<v Speaker 3>even when I started dating Wes, I was very forthcoming

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<v Speaker 3>to him of I don't even know if I'm ready

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<v Speaker 3>to be doing this yet.

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<v Speaker 4>But then I think when you, I mean, I dated.

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<v Speaker 3>A lot before I got married for the first time,

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<v Speaker 3>and then, you know, you, I just feel like at

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<v Speaker 3>a certain age and also having done it one time already,

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<v Speaker 3>you know you know what you're looking for. You know

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<v Speaker 3>when you meet somebody like you know that this is

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<v Speaker 3>this is going to be a good fit, This is

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<v Speaker 3>a great person. This is a person I want to

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<v Speaker 3>spend the rest of my life with. Why would I

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<v Speaker 3>risk going? Yeah, I'm just going to keep going when

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<v Speaker 3>I found you.

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<v Speaker 5>So maybe there maybe there's a middle ground where the

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<v Speaker 5>two opposite ends meet and that's the answer. But were

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<v Speaker 5>you ready to date or was Wes the right person

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<v Speaker 5>to date? What made him the first person?

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<v Speaker 4>I go back on what I said. I don't.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't even know that I was ready to date

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<v Speaker 3>when I started dating Wes, and I told him that,

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<v Speaker 3>I'm like, I am still in this weird space of like,

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<v Speaker 3>am I ready?

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<v Speaker 4>Am I not ready? I don't even really know.

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<v Speaker 3>But we went out for coffee and I was like, wait,

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<v Speaker 3>I really enjoyed myself. I had We had a great

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<v Speaker 3>conversation with a lot of things in common, a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of mutual values, and I'm like, I like him.

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<v Speaker 4>I like him.

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<v Speaker 3>I want to see where this goes. So it was

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<v Speaker 3>like healing and trying to figure out if I wanted

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<v Speaker 3>to even date as I was dating, and he was

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<v Speaker 3>aware of that.

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<v Speaker 2>You had a lot of picking up the pieces too,

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<v Speaker 2>Like I think that when you got divorced, that was

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<v Speaker 2>that was a tough tough thing for you. And so

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<v Speaker 2>I think that you also didn't want to bring somebody

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<v Speaker 2>else into it. And it seemed like because I remember

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<v Speaker 2>asking you questions. I remember asking you questions like are

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<v Speaker 2>you going to get out there and date?

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<v Speaker 1>What's going on? Because she did take them along. How

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<v Speaker 1>many years after the.

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<v Speaker 2>Divorce, I mean it was more than two, yeah, and

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<v Speaker 2>it was like she was like, I'm not ready for

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<v Speaker 2>another person, let alone for just me, you know what

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, Like she's trying to do it. But I

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<v Speaker 2>it's interesting you bring this up in both this person

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<v Speaker 2>that you met or saw in yourself second marriages.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>I wonder how many times that does happen because I

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<v Speaker 2>hear a lot of times because of similar situations with

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<v Speaker 2>friends who are just getting divorced or have been divorced.

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<v Speaker 1>They don't want to go.

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<v Speaker 2>Back out into the dating world, but they want companionship.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't want to be alone. They want to have

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<v Speaker 2>somebody that can share things with. And I wonder sometimes

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<v Speaker 2>if you treat it differently, because not that you're settling,

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<v Speaker 2>because nobody's going to settle, and if you settle, you'll

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<v Speaker 2>figure out that you settled, like that will come out

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<v Speaker 2>right away. But I wonder if It's kind of like

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<v Speaker 2>you find somebody and you're like, oh my god, this

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<v Speaker 2>person's actually nice and normal and great and whatever the

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<v Speaker 2>deal is, and it's like, you know what, I'm willing

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<v Speaker 2>to do this. Let's get married because her you said

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<v Speaker 2>hers was fast, wasn't it? Because she just got divorced.

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<v Speaker 3>She's been divorced officially for eighteen months, okay, she said,

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<v Speaker 3>And she's like everybody thinks I'm nuts.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you think she's only dated him for how long? Though?

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<v Speaker 4>Since Christmas?

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<v Speaker 2>So they've only dated for a couple of months yesterday,

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<v Speaker 2>so her first date, and she's like ready to go.

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<v Speaker 2>How soon after you and West started dating, did you

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<v Speaker 2>guys even talk marriage?

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<v Speaker 4>God, I don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>It was longer than that.

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<v Speaker 4>Oh yeah, oh god?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, but you know, and if Wes we're here

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<v Speaker 3>right now, I think we would both say we probably

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<v Speaker 3>got married too soon, Like we we knew that we

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<v Speaker 3>wanted to get married. But I think we we actually

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<v Speaker 3>like got married too soon. I don't know, I'm just

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<v Speaker 3>like a lot of different reasons. I still think that

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<v Speaker 3>we had a lot of things to work out and

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<v Speaker 3>figure out about each other and blending families under the

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<v Speaker 3>same roof, And I think we've done a decent job.

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<v Speaker 3>It hasn't been perfect, but that's like a really, really,

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<v Speaker 3>really big deal. Yeah, and I think we probably could

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<v Speaker 3>have taken more time with our kids getting to know

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<v Speaker 3>each other and us getting to know each other and

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<v Speaker 3>us getting to know each other's kids.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Reagan, Hello, Hi, what's happening?

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<v Speaker 6>Not much? How are you?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm doing great? What's going on?

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<v Speaker 6>I get how you steal Shannon. I was with my

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<v Speaker 6>person that I went to high school with. We were

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<v Speaker 6>in a relationship for eight years and we got married,

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<v Speaker 6>and then six months after we got married, we split

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<v Speaker 6>up and I met my husband now four months after

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<v Speaker 6>my divorce and we have been together since then. He

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<v Speaker 6>was the first person that I dated, and we also

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<v Speaker 6>got pregnant three months into our relations.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my goodness, could you imagine that you.

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<v Speaker 4>Feel the judgment like this this girl did? And I

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<v Speaker 4>guess like I kind of did.

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<v Speaker 3>Marrying the first person that you go out on a

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<v Speaker 3>date with after.

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<v Speaker 1>Your divorce.

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<v Speaker 6>Both like one hundred percent. And he also had a

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<v Speaker 6>child from his previous relationship as well, so people were like,

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<v Speaker 6>you're so crazy jumping in and becoming a stepmom and

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<v Speaker 6>having his child, and I'm like, guys, just don't know.

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<v Speaker 6>I totally feel like once you've been married and then

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<v Speaker 6>you you meet your actual person, there's a very different

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<v Speaker 6>love that you have for sure that you realized wasn't

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<v Speaker 6>there the first round.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh that's interesting.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, the question for you, Reagan, after you got divorced,

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<v Speaker 2>did you ever think you would marry again?

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<v Speaker 6>No? I definitely didn't. And he proposed fairly quick. He

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<v Speaker 6>proposed to me when our son was born. So we

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<v Speaker 6>got we were engaged nine months. And how did y'all

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<v Speaker 6>meet Tinder?

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<v Speaker 5>Okay, so were you looking for a date or were

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<v Speaker 5>you looking for a night out?

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<v Speaker 6>Honestly, just looking for a night out. And we both

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<v Speaker 6>told each other that interesting.

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<v Speaker 1>It's uh, my first.

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<v Speaker 6>Time on Tinder and the first one I matched with

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<v Speaker 6>it went out on a date.

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<v Speaker 2>The rest of It's interesting to hear second marriages and

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<v Speaker 2>how they came about, because a lot of times the

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<v Speaker 2>second marriages, you'll hear somebody say, I never thought I

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<v Speaker 2>was going to date again. I was not into wanting

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<v Speaker 2>to get married ever again, And all of a sudden

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<v Speaker 2>and it's like, you go for it, So Lexie, what's up?

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<v Speaker 1>It's moje on the morning. Hi, Hi guys, good morning.

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<v Speaker 7>It's more common than maybe Shannon you think, because I

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<v Speaker 7>also did first person I dated. I ended up just

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<v Speaker 7>getting married to him last week.

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<v Speaker 4>Really relations yup, so thank you.

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<v Speaker 7>And I met him through my brother. He was actually

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<v Speaker 7>my brother's friend, and I also was not looking to

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<v Speaker 7>date at all, So I think it is more common.

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<v Speaker 7>And like the last caller said, second marriages, I feel

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<v Speaker 7>like you just kind of know what you're looking for.

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<v Speaker 1>How long? How long were you dating him before you,

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<v Speaker 1>guys got married? A little over a year?

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<v Speaker 2>Is it like second marriage is like your second house

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<v Speaker 2>or second car. You knew everything that the other thing

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<v Speaker 2>had that you hated and some things that you actually liked.

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<v Speaker 2>So you kind of knew specifically what you were going

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<v Speaker 2>to look for, and then when you found it, you're like,

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<v Speaker 2>this is the one. I think I'm going to put

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<v Speaker 2>an offer in. That's what That's what it kind of

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<v Speaker 2>sounds like when I hear this story. Yeah, yeah, that's good.

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<v Speaker 2>That's nice. Nice to know, and I'm happy that you're

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<v Speaker 2>by the way, she's talking about as a listener, not

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<v Speaker 2>as the marriage part. So but Lexie, we love you,

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<v Speaker 2>thanks for listening.

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<v Speaker 7>Yeah, thanks, Bye, guys, Bye bye.

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<v Speaker 2>I love when we bring something up on the air

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<v Speaker 2>and the actual exact person that has that same sage

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<v Speaker 2>situation that Shannon's talking about with this other person that

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<v Speaker 2>she met and her and what comes in and we

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<v Speaker 2>got two calls. We're two for two with the exact

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<v Speaker 2>same you know, situations, because it makes you know how

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<v Speaker 2>relatable the stuff that we are all living in our

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<v Speaker 2>lives is living out there with our listeners through the speakers.

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<v Speaker 2>What's up, Amanda, Hi, Good morning everyone, Good morning. This

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<v Speaker 2>one is not a divorce, though, this was what happened.

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<v Speaker 8>Okay. So I was married for nineteen years and then

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<v Speaker 8>my husband passed away unexpectedly. So I was about eight

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<v Speaker 8>nine years ago, and then I had three children. I

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<v Speaker 8>had a son and two daughters. And then unexpectedly, like

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<v Speaker 8>a couple of years later, while I was at work,

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<v Speaker 8>I met a gentleman who was pretty new because I

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<v Speaker 8>was there for a long time, and it just he

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<v Speaker 8>asked me out on a date. I was unsure at first,

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<v Speaker 8>so I told him no, and then I called him

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<v Speaker 8>like a couple of days later, asked him on a date.

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<v Speaker 8>He said yeah, because at this point I already knew

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<v Speaker 8>obviously he was interested, so I was like, you know what,

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<v Speaker 8>I might as well just give it a whirl. So

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<v Speaker 8>I did and we have been together ever since. Months later,

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<v Speaker 8>three weeks, three months, three months later to Super Bowl.

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<v Speaker 2>So hey, Amanda, I gotta ask you some questions, because

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<v Speaker 2>first off, I'm I'm sorry to hear about the the

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<v Speaker 2>your husband passing away, and that's gotta be horrible unless

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<v Speaker 2>you murdered him and then you're happy about it, right,

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<v Speaker 2>But no, but I.

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<v Speaker 1>Gotta ask I gotta ask you a quick question.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure, did you feel like you were cheating on your

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<v Speaker 2>husband that died when you started dating again?

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<v Speaker 5>What I did?

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<v Speaker 8>For a split second, I did. But I do believe

0:11:20.120 --> 0:11:23.440
<v Speaker 8>in God, and I do believe people are put put

0:11:23.480 --> 0:11:25.720
<v Speaker 8>in your position or your path for a reason.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, do you think your husband? Do you think your

0:11:27.800 --> 0:11:29.640
<v Speaker 2>husband had something to do with you guys meeting?

0:11:31.040 --> 0:11:33.120
<v Speaker 8>You know what you did, And that would be a

0:11:33.120 --> 0:11:38.439
<v Speaker 8>whole other topic, but that's sweet. Yeah. Yeah, I actually

0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:41.120
<v Speaker 8>had a dream he came into my dream, and I

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<v Speaker 8>was like begging, I was praying, like, let him come

0:11:43.679 --> 0:11:46.400
<v Speaker 8>in my dream when I'm coming to my dream. Finally

0:11:46.520 --> 0:11:50.280
<v Speaker 8>he did, and he actually came into my husband, my

0:11:50.320 --> 0:11:54.440
<v Speaker 8>new husband's dream first and then came into my more.

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<v Speaker 4>And gave his blessing for you to be with him.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah yeah, wait wait, so how did you How did

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<v Speaker 5>the new man know that the man that came in

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<v Speaker 5>his dreams was your ex husband?

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<v Speaker 8>So it didn't happen right away, so he didn't before

0:12:12.640 --> 0:12:15.160
<v Speaker 8>he engaged me. So it was probably like two months,

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<v Speaker 8>and I've already had this conversation because I was very

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<v Speaker 8>leary at first just bringing another man into my house

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<v Speaker 8>with my kids period to let alone or Jesus went

0:12:26.200 --> 0:12:28.640
<v Speaker 8>through all this, you know, and I didn't wait it

0:12:28.720 --> 0:12:31.680
<v Speaker 8>was I would I would have probably waited either longer,

0:12:31.760 --> 0:12:34.960
<v Speaker 8>to be honest, but it just happened this way, you know,

0:12:35.160 --> 0:12:39.120
<v Speaker 8>So I just kind of went with it. But yeah,

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<v Speaker 8>I mean, he already knew the situation, and I had

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<v Speaker 8>already told them, you know, like these are my pride

0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:46.800
<v Speaker 8>and my joy, these are my children, I you know,

0:12:47.000 --> 0:12:50.559
<v Speaker 8>So it just he already knew kind of a little

0:12:50.559 --> 0:12:53.040
<v Speaker 8>bit about it. So it just love.

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<v Speaker 1>I love.

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<v Speaker 2>I love that that you you found love and that

0:13:00.040 --> 0:13:04.840
<v Speaker 2>your your first love is still there with you guys,

0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:09.480
<v Speaker 2>but also you know, loving that you are happy now

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<v Speaker 2>much because if I die I want Chelsea to be

0:13:14.559 --> 0:13:17.199
<v Speaker 2>miserable after I die and never date ever again.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not going to huh, I'm.

0:13:19.520 --> 0:13:24.000
<v Speaker 8>Not gonna If I die.

0:13:23.960 --> 0:13:27.000
<v Speaker 1>I want her to be celibate for the rest of

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<v Speaker 1>your life. No, I'm just kidding.

0:13:29.480 --> 0:13:33.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm just kidding. I mean, I mean, I'm so happy

0:13:33.480 --> 0:13:36.120
<v Speaker 2>for you. You brought a smile to all our faces

0:13:36.160 --> 0:13:37.440
<v Speaker 2>today when you told us that story.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you, Thank you so much.

0:13:40.440 --> 0:13:49.000
<v Speaker 2>A wonderful good stories, good good stories. I know, switch up,

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<v Speaker 2>like why you Why are you also a guy who's

0:13:53.559 --> 0:13:56.560
<v Speaker 2>got so much spiritual love? Why are you doubtful that

0:13:56.640 --> 0:13:59.360
<v Speaker 2>the man the man you're like doubtful?

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<v Speaker 1>How do we know always?

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<v Speaker 5>I'm not that's not interesting to you that the new

0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:05.600
<v Speaker 5>guy had a dream about it and his husband, But

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<v Speaker 5>you sounded like you were that.

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<v Speaker 1>I just wanted to know how he knew it was

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<v Speaker 1>the husband. These pictures of him trying to understand.

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<v Speaker 7>Bro.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't ask the question that's b asked. I'm just

0:14:16.920 --> 0:14:17.800
<v Speaker 1>asking a question.