S1: Listener.
S2: Crackpot acknowledges the traditional owners and custodians of the land
S2: in which we are recording this podcast. The Ulucay Wolen
S2: clan of the Boomerang who were a part of the
S2: Kulin nation. We pay our respects to our elders, past
S2: and present, and extend our respect to Aboriginal and Torres
S2: Strait Islander peoples today.
S3: Welcome to the Kick Pod a.
S2: Damn with your besties on the stuff that matters. One. Two. Three.
UU: Four. One. Two. Three. Four.
S2: Hello? Kick.
S3: Pod tech. Sydney.
S2: Kick. Pod tech. Sydney. It does. We are recording in
S2: Sydney today, guys. Which for your ears is exactly identical.
S2: But we. We just had to. I don't know, it's
S2: not even a confession. Yes.
S3: Producer Lindsay is in our ears instead of over by
S3: the window, which feels very odd.
S2: We keep looking to the window and then I'm like,
S2: oh yes, Lindsay's in Melbourne.
S3: But we are so, so excited to be here. And
S3: we've had such a big week full of very, very
S3: cool and exciting projects, one of which that we actually
S3: announced yesterday. So when we're recording this episode, we have
S3: been up here because we shot for our brand new
S3: Stax collection, which is so exciting because we announced yesterday
S3: that we have got another collection. Um, and our affirmation
S3: behind this collection, if you were a fan of the
S3: first one, you would know it was I am enough.
S3: And this one is I can and I will.
S2: It's been so exciting. So the first collection launch in
S2: it was crazy. It's Feb, February February this year. So
S2: six months ago. And everyone it was it was actually
S2: like it exceeded every expectation. It sold out in like
S2: half an hour VIP night which was in 30 minutes.
S2: Then when we went live the next day to everyone
S2: that wasn't in the VIP list, and we're going to
S2: put a link for you to be able to sign
S2: up to the VIP list, so you can be on that.
S2: It's like a VIP list. It's hard to get on,
S2: like you can sign up to it so you get
S2: early access to the collection before because it is likely
S2: we have we have got more this time because we
S2: want to make sure there's enough for everyone, but it
S2: is it. Just in case it does sell out, make
S2: sure you sign up to the VIP list. But it
S2: was crazy. Like it sold out so quickly and you
S2: guys just loved it. And having being able to work
S2: with the amazing Don until the Stax founders again on
S2: another collection and the incredible Stax team has been so
S2: awesome because we have been able to build in all
S2: of the feedback from the first collection. And we've also
S2: worked with Don and till on new designs that Stax
S2: have actually never done before either. And there are two tops,
S2: so we've got a halter neck crop. So it's a
S2: sports bra. That's a halter neck. Yeah, it is now.
S2: It's not super light support. Light support. Exactly. Right. Like
S2: it's not not for running but for the gym and stuff.
S2: It looks so, so hot. It is so good. And
S2: I was like, oh, I don't know if I wear
S2: a halter neck sports bra because like when we were
S2: doing the fitting, I was like, oh, this will be
S2: maybe more like a Steph one, I don't know. I just,
S2: I was like, I don't know how I'll feel in it. No,
S2: it looks so good. I walked out and I was like, oh, guys.
S2: Feeling myself like, I know 100 bucks, a million bucks,
S2: 10 million bucks. What am I saying? But it's just
S2: the way we work so hard on making sure it
S2: was this. The way the V shape, the perfect amount
S2: of kind of lowness, the ribbed, um, flexible waistband, the
S2: amount of kind of. It doesn't. I really don't like
S2: sports bras that pull a lot like halterneck that pull
S2: on your, your neck. Exactly. And so we've made sure
S2: like we've just, we've done it's super soft and it
S2: is in the premium seamless fabric. That's what's really exciting.
S2: So our last collection was in spandex. This one is
S2: in seamless. The whole collection stacks is famous for their seamless.
S2: It is such good quality. It's incredible. So we are
S2: just so excited for you to wear it. Yeah.
S3: And it's.
S2: Blue.
S3: It's blue? Yeah.
S2: And black and cream. And it's. It's just gorgeous and blue.
S2: Just makes me feel joyful. So. No, it's just to
S2: share this with you. We just hope you love it
S2: as much as we do.
S3: Yes. And the collection will officially be live on Friday
S3: the 13th of September. And also as we did last
S3: time as well to celebrate this Friday. It is this Friday.
S2: Yes. So this week guys, and the, the early um,
S2: the early access is Thursday evening. So make sure you
S2: sign up and then you'll get that access for this
S2: Thursday night and then yeah live.
S3: For everyone else.
S2: On Friday. But last time there was hardly anything left
S2: as we said. So just make sure you sign up
S2: to VIP.
S3: Exactly. Um, but to celebrate the launch, we are also
S3: hosting an event in Melbourne. So last time we did
S3: an event in Sydney decided to do it in our
S3: home town of Melbourne. This time around, next Saturday, the
S3: 21st of September, we've got a panel chat with the
S3: two of us and Don and till and an empowering
S3: workshop which, if you were from Sydney and came to
S3: the first one we had, we had so many really
S3: positive reviews from the workshop that we did, and also
S3: for us, it was probably one of the most rewarding
S3: things we've got to do at an event, so we
S3: are so looking forward to that and can't wait to
S3: see you all there. But we will pop a link
S3: in the show notes for early Access, but we'll also
S3: pop a link in there to secure your spot if
S3: you would like to come along to that event in Melbourne. Okay,
S3: so we are chatting about cheating again because a couple
S3: of episodes ago now, we spoke about whether or not
S3: cheating was a deal breaker. And laws and I, we
S3: shared our opinion. Um, and then we jumped onto our
S3: Instagram and also in our Facebook group. And quite a
S3: lot of you disagreed with us, which, you know, all
S3: open to all opinions. But we thought there's more to
S3: this and it's worth getting our expert on Megan Luscomb
S3: to talk through how she might have helped clients through this.
S3: And so. Hello, Megan.
S4: Hello. Hello my love.
S3: I got so excited when I saw your comment on
S3: the video, but also very nervous about what your thoughts
S3: were going to be on our opinion because I was like,
S3: I hope we did her proud, but I would love
S3: to know what do you think? Like how how what
S3: have you worked through with clients when cheating comes up?
S3: Is it a deal breaker?
S4: Um, look, I will say more often than not, no,
S4: it's not a deal breaker. I, I think, um, both
S4: of you made really good points regarding the nuance of infidelity.
S4: And I think what's really important to clarify is that
S4: cheating is a term has evolved so much over, I
S4: would say, the past maybe 5 to 10 years when
S4: I was a teen, cheating was you were having sex
S4: with somebody else. Whereas now the term has really evolved
S4: into people using cheating for their partner, following someone on
S4: social media that they don't like having relationships with other
S4: gender they're attracted to. So I think what's really important
S4: to remember is when one person uses the term cheating,
S4: it may not necessarily apply in the same way that
S4: another person means cheating. And I think it's so important
S4: that we can all sort of hold space for that,
S4: because I know with clients that I've worked with, somebody
S4: has booked a session with me and said, oh, my
S4: partner cheated on me. And based on how I expressed
S4: the word cheating, my assumption is you're speaking about they've
S4: had sexual intercourse with somebody who wasn't you. And when
S4: we started the session, they let me know that their
S4: partner had been talking to somebody else who they weren't
S4: romantically involved with. So that, to me, is something that
S4: we all really need to start having conversations about is
S4: when we say cheating, what are we explicitly meaning?
S2: Oh, absolutely. And Megan, you said as well that as
S2: you said, it's not it doesn't have to be a
S2: deal breaker. No. Now, very interestingly, we did a poll
S2: on our Instagram and only 2% of people voted that
S2: it like agreed with us that it wasn't. It doesn't
S2: have to be a deal breaker now. 30% said they
S2: were kind of on the fence like it depend on
S2: it depended on the circumstances. And then 63% said it
S2: was a deal breaker. Yeah for sure. In your experience
S2: within all of all of your clients, obviously there's so
S2: many different circumstances where cheating can occur. Yeah, absolutely. Are
S2: there instances where because something that came through in the comments,
S2: it was quite interesting. Like Steph and I spoke a
S2: little bit about an affair. Like for me personally, I
S2: don't think I could come back from my partner having
S2: an affair. And then also a few people said if
S2: it was like a kiss and a nightclub, they could
S2: get through it. But if it was any more than that,
S2: they couldn't. Yeah. What circumstances have you. Are there any
S2: kind of specific circumstances that you see where cheating does occur?
S2: And it does tend to be a pattern and the
S2: relationship can't come back from that.
S4: Yeah. Look, I think what's when most people come to
S4: me regarding cheating, it's because they want to repair, they
S4: want to make the relationship work. And from all the
S4: people that I've worked with when it comes to infidelity,
S4: they haven't just woken up one day and decided to
S4: cheat on their partner. They've been going through something. The
S4: relationship's been going through something the individuals have been going through,
S4: something the people I've worked with haven't cheated from a
S4: place of maliciousness. And I know some people listening to
S4: this will go well. Cheating is malicious, but I think
S4: it's really important to remember that humans are humans and
S4: we're not all perfect, and we make mistakes, and we
S4: do things that sometimes we don't think we would. And
S4: it needs to be talked about from a place of situational.
S4: And that's where the nuance comes in. And I think
S4: when Steph, you were saying that, you know, people can
S4: be in dark places and like things happen. I think
S4: that conversation is something we need to be talking about more.
S4: But also, I think, Laura, when you were saying the
S4: affair and that you may not be able to come
S4: back from that, and it's because in the scenarios you're
S4: talking about, a fear is when we're talking about long
S4: term and we're generally talking about a relationship. So it's
S4: not even an affair anymore. You're having a relationship with
S4: somebody else, and that's for people can be harder to
S4: come back from because now it's you've changed the dynamic
S4: of us, and now you've turned to somebody else as
S4: opposed to me, who is the person who was your
S4: primary person and so on and so forth. Whereas for
S4: some people, cheating is a one off experience. I'm not
S4: saying this is across the board and this is how
S4: it happens all the time. I'm just using this as
S4: an example for now. For some people they may go, oh,
S4: I cheated. Once I gave, I had a cheeky pash
S4: with somebody in the bar and it'll never happen again.
S4: Whereas somebody else saying, I've been having an affair for
S4: 3 to 4 years, that can be very different and
S4: I think every different. There are so many different and
S4: varied scenarios. And what I do see often is the
S4: people who often have a black and white, um, like, no,
S4: I could never like kidding is a deal breaker. Um,
S4: I think sometimes they're speaking from a place of they
S4: haven't been through the experience, so they're able to go, no,
S4: it's a deal breaker for me because they're not on the, um,
S4: the situation of having gone through it. And I think
S4: people who go through it, um, probably are able to
S4: speak to more of the nuance of that. It's not
S4: simply black and white in all cases.
S3: Yeah, it's so true. And I mean, outside of talking
S3: to an expert like yourself, if someone is listening and
S3: they've gone through this and maybe they're trying to work
S3: through if they can stay with their partner or not,
S3: and kind of make that decision on whether that's going
S3: to come back, what would you say? Obviously, outside of
S3: being very open with their partner. What what would you
S3: say to. Yeah. To do or to try and figure
S3: out if it's going to be if you're going to
S3: be able to kind of trust them again. And that
S3: relationship can work long term.
S5: Yeah.
S4: It takes a lot of, uh, introspection, but it also
S4: takes a lot of accountability for the quality of the
S4: relationship and the quality of the people in the relationship.
S4: So what I would say is, if you are going
S4: through it and you're wondering, can we come out the
S4: other side? It's being able to analyze where the relationship
S4: was and the quality of it leading up to the
S4: I'm just going to say the incident. I'm just going
S4: to assume that it's a one off in this circumstance
S4: and working out how you were both showing up in
S4: the relationship as individuals, but as a couple before the
S4: incident took place. It also then relies on the person
S4: who engaged in the cheating to be able to take
S4: accountability theirself and do the work on themselves in order
S4: to be able to face whatever they're going through to
S4: ensure that they can grow and evolve and come out
S4: the other side. Because even though the saying is once
S4: a cheater, always a cheater, that's completely, fundamentally incorrect because
S4: we can't say that humans evolve and humans can change,
S4: and we can't say that people can change without also
S4: saying that somebody who has cheated can also have the
S4: capacity to no longer do it. What I will say
S4: there are some people who are not meant to be monogamous.
S4: Some people are more inclined to be in open relationships
S4: and to be polyamorous. And I think sometimes it's worth
S4: having those conversations as well. I think we all put
S4: a pressure on ourselves to be in a monogamous mindset,
S4: because we are in a very heavily monogamous society. But
S4: I think sometimes it's important that people also just peel
S4: the layer back a little bit and ask themselves, is
S4: this structure what I want? Is this something that aligns
S4: with me and to sort of have a conversation from
S4: that standpoint, but be kind to yourself and each other
S4: because it's um, it's a really emotionally loaded Topic.
S2: That is very I mean, as always, Megan, when is
S2: it ever not good advice from you? That is that
S2: is very, very good advice. And we actually have a
S2: question from a listener that has come up that we're
S2: going to ask you now. And it actually it's really
S2: interesting because your definition of I originally read it and
S2: I was like, that's not I didn't think of cheating
S2: when I read it, but by your definition of cheating,
S2: I actually think that, I mean, depending on the person
S2: it could come into for them. Like obviously everyone is different,
S2: but it could come in the kind of wide, wide range.
S2: So yeah, our community member has said, I fairly innocently
S2: look through my partner's photos on his phone to try
S2: to see if he had any screenshots or saved images
S2: of engagement rings that I'd been hinting at. Hahahahah! I
S2: came across some old, very explicit and intimate videos of
S2: him and his ex from a few years ago. He
S2: doesn't speak to his ex and this relationship ended badly.
S2: I've never looked through his phone before as I've never
S2: felt the need to. And trust him wholeheartedly. I feel
S2: bad for going through his phone, but now I feel
S2: sick and I don't know how to bring up that.
S2: I've seen these videos and then the listener is asking,
S2: how do I tell him to delete them? And I
S2: would maybe ask you, is that the next step, or
S2: is there a conversation about it before action is taken?
S4: Oh, wow. Isn't this, uh, isn't this a relatable, uh,
S4: behavior that going through your partner's phone, right? I think
S4: a lot of people listening to this will probably go,
S4: I've done this before. I mean, this was definitely me
S4: when I was like 18 to 21. I mean, I'm
S4: nearly 40 now, so a long time since I've done it,
S4: but I can relate to the motivations of doing it.
S4: I think what's really important to remember is we need
S4: to acknowledge that behavior, because going through your partner's phone
S4: without their knowledge, it's not an innocent action. It never.
S5: Is.
S4: If we're doing something without our partner's consent, that's not
S4: an innocent action. As much as we can say to
S4: ourselves that all we had, you know, we had good motives,
S4: you know. Well, if you were doing it without their knowledge,
S4: that's actually that's a trust issue in itself. And I
S4: think we all need to be able to acknowledge that.
S4: And I know so many people get very frustrated with
S4: me when I say going through your partner's phone is
S4: a no no, and you should never do that, because
S4: what I usually hear back is, oh, well, if they've
S4: got nothing to hide, then they won't care. That's not
S4: the point. The point is, everybody deserves privacy, and they
S4: deserve to have things that they that are their own.
S4: And sure, if your partner lets you go through their
S4: phone and you both share passwords and things like that,
S4: that's totally fine. And I'm all for that. If that's
S4: a consensual agreement within your relationship, but to do it
S4: without their knowledge, that's a trust break and it's a
S4: boundary break. And I think it's important that the person
S4: who sent this through can sort of take that self-accountability
S4: and go. Actually, that wasn't an innocent.
S5: Motivation.
S4: For me. I was doing something without telling them. But
S4: I think the next step is you've got to decide
S4: whether you're going to.
S5: Tell.
S4: Now before anyone's like, oh, you know, Megan's condoning secrets.
S4: I think it's always important to reflect on whether you're
S4: going to bring up what you found out, because you
S4: need to actually start considering the values and the relationship
S4: values before you make a decision. And what I'm saying
S4: in that is a lot of the time we will
S4: disclose behaviors and things that we've done, not from a
S4: place because we want to mend and we want to
S4: grow stronger, and we want the relationship to become better.
S4: But we disclose from a place of guilt alleviation. We
S4: feel bad and we want to feel better about what
S4: we've done, so we disclose that. So it's about being
S4: able to identify. Am I disclosing because I need to
S4: relieve my guilt for doing something that I know that
S4: I shouldn't have done, and because now I actually want
S4: them to do something with what I found out or
S4: I made, or am I disclosing because I want to
S4: integrate this into the relationship as a new standard or
S4: expectation of we shouldn't be going through our phones without
S4: each other's knowledge. That's a really that's a really poor
S4: behavior that we don't want. And maybe we now need
S4: to have a bigger conversation about what we are putting
S4: on our phones, relating to our past. Does that make sense?
S4: What I just said, no, it does.
S3: And I think like there's a good there's a good
S3: chance that like, he's forgotten that all of that content's
S3: even on there. So it's like once she if she
S3: wants to bring it up, as you said, now she's
S3: got to decide if it's something that she wants to
S3: bring up. But, you know, it's you know, once that
S3: decision has been made, like he could turn around and
S3: be like, oh my God, I didn't even know that
S3: they were still on there. Of course I can get
S3: rid of them. Yeah. Um, but yeah, it's an interesting also,
S3: I could he.
S4: Could also turn around and feel very deceived.
S3: Yes. Totally.
S5: Very true. Yeah.
S4: I don't have a wrong versus right. Whether you should
S4: disclose whether you shouldn't I don't I'm not the, you
S4: judge and jury here. I think everybody has their own autonomy.
S4: But I do think it's important to always be introspective
S4: and unpack your motivations for why you're going to do
S4: something before you do it 100%.
S2: Now, I don't know if this question is me thinking
S2: about it in a black and white way, but if
S2: he was watching the videos hypothetically regularly.
S5: Yep.
S2: How would for this person is that a breach of
S2: trust within a relationship? Obviously it depends on on the people.
S2: I don't I feel like if my husband was watching
S2: videos of him having sex with other partners while we
S2: were together, I would actually find that really uncomfortable.
S4: Yeah, I think it's okay to feel, and I absolutely
S4: think it's okay to feel uncomfortable about these things. It's
S4: okay to.
S5: Go.
S4: Oh, that feels really icky. I that doesn't feel good
S4: within me and that feels icky. It's okay to feel
S4: all of those things, but it's also important that we
S4: need to acknowledge that our partner had a past, and
S4: that past involved things that didn't have anything to do
S4: with us. And if they're watching content on about their past,
S4: that's that's actually still their prerogative to do it. And
S4: I get that that feels icky. But my, my whole,
S4: you know, empowerment for people is we need to respect
S4: autonomy and we need to respect that our partners are
S4: people that exist without us and without our influence. And
S4: they have past that don't involve us. And they're entitled
S4: to have those moments of their past in ways that
S4: serve them. And I know that feels really uncomfortable, and
S4: I know it feels really conflicting, but that's what a
S4: relationship really needs in order to have trust and to
S4: have a connection of togetherness. It's being able to have
S4: this respect and to and to know that our partner is.
S5: Still.
S4: Showing up in the relationship and obviously committed to us,
S4: but they also are able to have thoughts and things
S4: about their past that still have nothing to do with us.
S4: And I get it. That feels icky. And I know
S4: a lot of people are probably going to listen to
S4: this and be like, stop that. I get it. It
S4: feels confronting and it feels really conflicting, but it doesn't
S4: mean that it's not something we need to start, you know,
S4: considering and thinking about seriously.
S6: I love it.
S3: I just every time, every time we call you that.
S2: Is very, very good advice. And I think to our listener,
S2: I hope that helps. And yeah, so it's just now
S2: to think about if you want to have the conversation
S2: or not. Megan, one last thing. Just on this, I
S2: apologize for going back into it. But if for this listener,
S2: they because I think if it was me, I think
S2: where I'd really struggle is if I, if I did
S2: find it and I was worried like, oh, is he
S2: watching this? I don't know all of those thoughts. It's
S2: this battle with living with this knowledge that you now have,
S2: but also obviously Navigating. Well, I have been. I've deceived
S2: my partner because I have gone on their phone without
S2: asking them, and they didn't know that. And that's a
S2: that's a breach of trust in itself.
S5: Yeah.
S2: If for this listener, they kind of they decide that
S2: you know what. No, I shouldn't have gone on the
S2: phone without, you know, asking. But then it gets to
S2: a month and this is like just eating them inside.
S2: And they think about it every time they see their partner.
S2: Is that at a point where you would. Because I
S2: think that would be really hard if you you want
S2: to have trust in your relationship. But I think the
S2: hardest thing and this is why maybe we don't we
S2: shouldn't go through people's phones is that once, you know,
S2: have new information, it's fucking so hard to unsee it.
S2: And it, like, takes over your whole body. Yeah.
S4: Yeah, that's exactly right. And I think, I think there
S4: are probably two ways that I would say for this
S4: listener to really start thinking about it. If they want
S4: to disclose. Go for it. But it's always important to
S4: fall on your sword. When we fall on our sword,
S4: we take accountability for our own actions, and then we
S4: do the olive branch of how can we rebuild and repair? Okay,
S4: so that's the. I shouldn't have gone through your phone.
S4: I'm sorry. However, what I found is been really confronting for.
S5: Me.
S4: And ABC. Now, we can't explicitly ask our partner to
S4: remove things from their phones. They have nothing to do
S4: with us because it's their phone and it's their private information.
S4: But what you can potentially do is ask for a compromise.
S4: You may say something along the lines of it comes
S4: to content that involves your past relationships. Is there an
S4: opportunity or a possibility for you to put that on
S4: a hard drive.
S5: That.
S4: Is existing somewhere in the house that you that that
S4: you don't have on your phone? You may throw in
S4: a compromise. And again, your partner can say no to
S4: that because it's their phone and it's their content. But
S4: I think what's really important to remember is if you're
S4: holding on to this after a month, say, this listener
S4: decided not to say anything, and 3 or 4 months
S4: down the track, they're still thinking about it. Of course,
S4: you can still bring it up. It's something that you
S4: did a few months ago. You know, if that's what
S4: you want to do. but it's always leading in with
S4: Self-accountability and then coming up with a plan for repair
S4: and reconnect. And I think that's the most important thing
S4: to be able to do is that self-accountability and repair
S4: and and reconnect. And it's completely up to what this
S4: listener wants to do. There's no right or wrong. It's
S4: just what they want to do.
S3: And I think that's that's been the biggest message from today.
S3: And I think that's what I love so much about
S3: your advice is that there's no right or wrong. So
S3: even if this conversation happens and it doesn't go down
S3: the way you know, they want it to, it's then
S3: up to them if they feel comfortable or not staying
S3: in the relationship.
S5: Absolutely.
S4: Absolutely 100%.
S2: Thank you. Megan, you are a queen. We appreciate you
S2: so much and your wisdom wise.
S4: I love our chats.
S5: Thank you so much, ladies.
S2: Bye.
S7: One. Two. Three. Four.
S2: Okay, guys. Hi. Hi. Hi. I, I need to talk
S2: to you about something. I feel like this year there
S2: was there was a point in the podcast where every
S2: week I had a story about my two dogs, Bill
S2: and Ben, pooing in the house. And some people loved it.
S2: Some people did not love it so much. Yeah, it.
S3: Does need a disclaimer this segment.
S2: If you don't like talking about poo, do not listen
S2: to this segment.
S3: And probably I'm gonna say there's probably going to be
S3: a little swear word thrown in there and maybe here
S3: and there.
S2: So what happened in my house a couple of weeks
S2: ago was fucked again.
S3: And F-word two.
S2: There you go. Oh, you said s word. Shit. Okay.
S2: It was actually like. I'm so sorry. I'm okay.
S3: So you can say it was fucked.
S2: I am working from home. I'm so. I'm at home
S2: for this day. And what had happened was the day before,
S2: poor little Benny had had. My dog had had a
S2: very sore tummy. And every time he ate he was vomiting.
S2: So he had vomited in his all good. Now though,
S2: in case anyone's worried like I was. But he's all
S2: good now, and he's vomited in his bed and Bill's bed,
S2: and we have these beds that you can wash. You
S2: can take them apart and wash, and it honestly takes
S2: probably five minutes to put them back to bed together.
S2: But it is the bane of my existence. I it
S2: is my least favourite job. I hate it more than
S2: making our bed. Yeah, and I really don't like putting
S2: sheets on the bed, so it's just very. I feel the.
S3: Same way about couch cushion.
S2: Covers. Yes, it's similar, similar experience. Right. Anyway. But I
S2: was like, look, we'll leave the it's a bit gross,
S2: but I was like, we'll leave the beds for another
S2: night because if he vomits again, I'm not doing that twice. Okay,
S2: so we've got beds, dog beds with vomit. Then we
S2: wake up in the morning and Ben has then vomited
S2: the poor thing all over the rug. Now, because this
S2: is a common occurrence in our household, it hasn't happened
S2: for a while. We have a washable rug. We have
S2: a washable rug that can go in the in a
S2: commercial washing machine. So at the laundromat, which has everyone
S2: that's been on my dry saga story. You know, I
S2: spend a lot of time at the laundromat. I'm well
S2: accustomed to that. Anyway, so the house smells like vomit. Okay,
S2: it is what it is. I had to go to
S2: a physio appointment, go to my physio appointment. I come
S2: back and I'm like, I walk into our house and
S2: I was like, oh my God, I can smell vomit,
S2: but I can also smell sewerage. And I was like,
S2: oh my God. And I'm walking. And as I'm getting
S2: closer to our bathroom, I'm like, our bedroom, mind you,
S2: and our ensuite, that doesn't have a door. It's all
S2: open space. Yeah, it's getting worse and worse. And I
S2: was like, what has Dawson done in this house? Like what?
S2: He went straight to blaming Dalton. I'm like, What is
S2: Dalton done? Walk into our bathroom now. Our shower in
S2: our rental is it's a little bit random. It's like
S2: it's almost got a bath built into it. But it's
S2: not one of those bath showers.
S3: It's a square shower with a step down.
S2: Step down? Exactly.
S3: Yeah, but it's not. It's probably like. What would you say?
S3: I don't know how many centimeters, but it's not super,
S3: super deep.
S2: No it's not. It's probably about 30.
S3: Great for washing the dogs.
S2: Yeah, yeah. True, true. Anyway, so I walk into our
S2: bathroom and I was like, what the actual. Sorry to swear,
S2: but fuck. We had sewage in our shower. Sewage pool,
S2: water in our shower. And I was like, oh my God.
S2: So the sewage through the pipes has come up through
S2: all not all of the most of the drains in
S2: our house. And so the, the basins and including our
S2: shower had floating poo. I honestly died, I was like,
S2: oh my God, how am I ever going to stand?
S2: It's like absorbing into the walls of the shower. There's floaties.
S2: It is not good. And then I'm like, oh my God, Dalton,
S2: what are we going to do? Because the plumbing is not. Again,
S2: I really like to be empowered except to not plumbing.
S2: It's not my domain. I then walk out and then
S2: I'm like, where's Bill and Ben gone? I walk around
S2: outside and mind you, Ben with a sore tummy, who's
S2: just come back from the vet having an injection to
S2: not vomit anymore, and he's on a strict diet of, uh,
S2: rice and chicken boiled with nothing on it. And, Bill,
S2: they're both. So the drain also is outside. It is
S2: overflowing outside. It's made a big puddle of stuff. Bill
S2: and Ben are there drinking it, and and they then
S2: smell like sewage as well. And our house, I can't
S2: it was vomit. It was sewage. It was. Oh, my God,
S2: I can't even explain to you. And it was quite,
S2: it was quite. It was, it was a lot. So
S2: tell me it was a lot. Because I know you.
S3: Guys got, like an emergency plumber in straight away. But you.
S3: I know this because you've just moved in. You're renting
S3: and your spare bedroom isn't set up. Yes. So you
S3: slept in your. We did. What was that night like?
S2: Oh, yes. So we it went down because the emergency plumber.
S2: But the thing is unfortunately there's some in the all.
S2: It's the same in our old house. The pipes were
S2: made of terracotta so tree roots can get into them. Yes.
S2: Isn't it crazy? They used to make people used to
S2: make pipes out of terracotta. I'm no plumber, but that
S2: seems quite out there. Well, you know, I don't think
S2: they do it anymore. Wasn't, as you know. Yeah. I
S2: don't think they do it anymore anyway. But yes, it was.
S2: I sprayed so much stuff. I scrubbed the shower I
S2: it was, it was, it was, it was a lot.
S2: It was a lot. And it just it just got
S2: me thinking like plumbing is just like hats off to.
S3: All the plumbers out there. Seriously, how they do it? Slay.
S3: I really don't know how they do.
S2: It, but it's also one of the like I've never
S2: had poo in the shower before. So it was. Yeah, I'm.
S3: Sure many people haven't.
S2: But I did what? We washed the dog beds and
S2: we washed the rug, and now we have like a
S2: rug that looks brand new. So that's a positive, very positive.
S2: But it was genuinely a shit show. I love Plumbing
S2: disaster of all time.
S3: No, that is definitely. That is definitely a big plumbing disaster.
S3: It makes me think though, like there's I have no
S3: doubt in my mind that our community will absolutely have
S3: some stories, but I would like to share one. I
S3: think when you told me about this, it made me
S3: think about any plumbing disasters that I've been a part of.
S3: And one time up the farm, which is my husband
S3: Josh's family holiday house, his dad came in and said
S3: to all of us, look, I'm going to be under
S3: the house with the pipes. No one used the bathroom
S3: for like the next little while we were watching a movie.
S3: So I think I was a bit like just nodding along,
S3: but like, didn't really clock what he'd said. It was
S3: some time afterwards.
S2: But how much.
S3: Time? I don't remember, but it wasn't straight away.
S2: At least it was.
S3: Long enough that he was under the house for a
S3: while and I went to the toilet.
S2: Wait, he's not a plumber either. He's not? No.
S3: So he knows his things. Okay. You know, he's a
S3: handy dude. So he was under there and I went
S3: to the toilet, forgetting he was under the house and, um,
S3: went number twos.
S2: You did a poo.
S3: I did a poo, and the pipes were open, and
S3: he came inside and was like, who did the toilet?
S3: And I wasn't alone. Like there was, I think like Ethan. Josh, like,
S3: there was quite a few of us there. And I
S3: was like, just instantly I realized what I had done. No. Yes,
S3: of course I did. Well, everyone also knew that I
S3: went to the toilet. But did you announce it? No
S3: one decided. Well, I'd left the room and come back. Well, you.
S2: Didn't, you didn't. But no one.
S3: Else had gone to the toilet because they were all
S3: they all.
S2: Remembered. I would have said no. I went to the
S2: bedroom to, um, brush my hair. It felt naughty.
S3: What had happened was basically my shit had flown with
S3: water out of the pipe and apparently just missed his head.
S3: Like just missed his head. And I just, I think back.
S2: Now, and I think it's.
S3: The funniest thing ever.
S2: Because I.
S3: Almost shat on my father in law's.
S2: Head. You nearly pooed in your father in law's mouth.
S2: Why did you have to go there? Is that a fetish?
S2: In some places?
S3: Disgusting. But anyway. So. Yeah, it was, um. That's that's
S3: my story.
S2: So your father in law, Ken? Yes, as I call him. Yes.
S2: Came in and said, who pooed then? Did he say who?
S2: Poo went in my. Did he say who's the toilet?
S2: And then you confess or did he say, hey, a
S2: poo just flew Blew into my face. Whose was it?
S2: I think it.
S3: Was more like who? Just use the toilet. And then
S3: I was like, oh, and everyone looked at me because
S3: I was the only one who had left the room.
S2: Why are you so truthful, Laura?
S3: I was the only one who left the room.
S2: I would deny for the rest of my life.
S3: No, no, no, I literally couldn't, I couldn't, I literally
S3: could not. Like, how could you? So if we were
S3: sitting in a room, you, me, Dalton, Josh and your
S3: two sisters sitting in the lounge room, you were the
S3: only one who left the room. Two seconds later, after
S3: you've come back to the room, your mum comes in
S3: and says, who used the bathroom? We would all, of course,
S3: look straight at you because we'd be like, well, we've
S3: been here. How are you going to get out of that?
S2: I've got the best, I've got the best thing. That's
S2: what I do. And also, guys, I'm not a liar.
S2: But I think you might be. I wouldn't want to
S2: admit that I pooed on my father in law's head
S2: like me.
S3: It was me. I was like, oh, fuck.
S2: What a privilege. No. Okay, so what I would say
S2: this is how to get out of this situation. And guys,
S2: I just want to say I don't want to again,
S2: I'm not a liar, but I just would not want
S2: my father in law in this situation. I'm not admitting
S2: it was me, okay? That is, I am a liar
S2: in this situation. Literally.
S3: No way.
S2: Let me tell you. I realized I had to check
S2: my phone. It was in the room or something like that.
S2: Make a reason to go to the room? I needed
S2: to get something from the room. When I walked in there,
S2: I realized that Dalton left a huge pool in the toilet.
S2: Oh my God. And I was so disgusted that I
S2: flushed it. I'm so sorry, Ken. I forgot that you.
S3: Of course you would blame Dalton. Of course you would
S3: blame Dalton.
S2: At least my father in law would not think that
S2: my poo nearly hit him. He would think it was
S2: his son's, which is much better for everyone. The end. Linz,
S2: what do you think of that?
S1: Oh my God, I'm dying. Am I evil?
S2: Am I evil or is that what? Can you guys
S2: let me know? Because there is a time where a
S2: little white lie to let to just think that. So
S2: your father in law thinks that his own, uh, child's
S2: poo has been near his face instead of someone he's
S2: not related to.
S3: Can I just say any shit near your face is shit, right?
S2: No, but you want. He would have once cleaned Josh's nappies.
S3: That's very different to an adult human. Poo in some ways.
S3: Probably would prefer my poo than Josh's, I would say.
S3: But it's like it's. It's not that. It's like. Also,
S3: I'm pretty close with my father in law, but he
S3: also was laughing, like it wasn't like a.
S2: Still, did I? I would still deny it. I can't
S2: believe that. What would you do?
S1: I think that I would have to own up to it.
S1: I don't think that I could. I'm not a very
S1: good liar. I don't think I could get away with it.
S2: Me neither. I'd also be laughing the whole time.
S3: I just can't.
S2: I can't. Guys, we're going to put a poll on
S2: the stories. Because this lie is I. Lying is very
S2: bad in terms of, like where it harms the relationship,
S2: where it's. You don't need to validate that.
S3: Honey, do you.
S2: Know what I mean? Like, this is a white lie
S2: that just. I just don't need my father in law.
S3: You would throw Dalton under the bus over so many things, though.
S3: That tells me. Yeah, of course, of course.
S2: Thinks he.
S3: Hasn't done.
S2: You guys tell me, what would you do? Am I
S2: evil or am I just smart?
S3: Look, I wasn't smart in this situation. I literally did
S3: the opposite of what I was told.
S2: That's not the right word. And, you know, all I
S2: can think of right now is talking to myself from
S2: mean Girls. Say, say it to me. Say it to me.
S2: I made you say it yesterday. What? You dirty. Go, go, you.
S8: Dirty little liar!
S3: You didn't say that to me yesterday. What did I say?
S3: You said little bitch. And I was like, what the actual.
UU: Fuck? We've had the longest day ever. And you do
UU: it to me, you little bitch.
S3: Because you had to get changed.
S2: One more time than I did. Do you know why, guys?
S2: I'm dying because it was the end of the photo shoot.
S2: We had been. We had been. We had been shooting since. Okay.
S2: So we started shooting yesterday at 4:30 a.m. or started
S2: hair and makeup at 4:30 a.m.. This is 6 p.m.
S2: now I don't modelling for me is I've got I
S2: like it's our own collection. It's obviously so exciting. But
S2: we had changed 45 times. That's an exaggeration. Probably 15.
S2: But I was like and in my head I knew
S2: we were on our last change. We just had to put.
S2: We were putting the jumper on top for the last
S2: shot and our shorts were going to stay, because changing
S2: your top, fine. It's changing. You take the shoes off,
S2: you put the shoes back on. That's where for me,
S2: I was like in my head I was like, Laura,
S2: well done. You have changed 15,000 times. You are done.
S2: This is the last thing you just put a jumper on.
S2: And then the combo, because the jumper is the blue
S2: and the cream I don't like black and blue together
S2: is not the vibe. So we were like, we need
S2: blue and cream.
S3: Yeah, yeah.
S2: But I was putting the cream jumper on and I
S2: had cream shorts on. Yeah. And there's only one blue jumper,
S2: so Steffi kept her cream shorts on. But it wasn't
S2: your choice. Stop it! What?
S3: Stop it! You're still trying to make me look like
S3: a little bitch. You were in the shots just before
S3: I was in the cream shorts and the blue jumper.
S3: And you were in the blue shorts and the cream
S3: jumper when I went to change. Maddy said, we need
S3: you in the same outfits as the last shot. So
S3: you put the jumper on, and I'm going to put
S3: Laura back in the blue shorts. So I went into
S3: the change rooms.
S2: Got changed.
S3: As soon as Maddy passed you those shorts, you looked
S3: at me and you said, you little bitch. Dirty.
S2: I said.
S3: You didn't. You said, you little bitch.
S2: But what I was trying to in my head also
S2: for everyone's like, oh my God, Laura, you little savage.
S2: She was so savage. But when I was also trying,
S2: I was thinking of the mango scene in my head,
S2: and I totally jumbled the words to the point that
S2: it just sounded like I called you a little bitch.
S2: And I really was trying to say you're dirty little
S2: because I was going crazy at this point of the day. Anyway,
S2: it was all over having to change into a pair
S2: of shorts, which I loved. Took me five seconds and
S2: it was fine, but it was so funny because I
S2: was trying to say that line. Anyway. So anyway.
S3: Anyway, moving back to the short stories, please, please let
S3: us know what you would have done. We'll put a
S3: poll in the Facebook group and on our stories of
S3: what you would have done if you would have lied
S3: and said it wasn't your you didn't go to the toilet,
S3: or if you would own up to it. And then
S3: also please send us in your plumbing disaster stories and
S3: we will share them next week.
S9: But is it time for special share?
S3: Share. My special share is actually a go to meditation
S3: of of mine on the Kik app, and it's called
S3: four Part Breath and it's with Jamie. This is also
S3: known as box Breathing. It goes for about five minutes,
S3: but you can do the practice for much longer than that.
S3: But basically through the meditation he teaches you how to
S3: stop and breathe and focus on your breath and get
S3: to four part breath, which is when you breathe in
S3: for four counts, hold for four counts, out for four counts,
S3: hold for four counts. And for me, this breathing meditation
S3: and even just this method is the best thing to
S3: do when I'm really stressed. Or my heart rate's like
S3: through the roof. And the reason why I wanted to
S3: bring it up, because it's one of my favorites and
S3: my go to, obviously. But the reason why I also
S3: wanted to bring it up now, because I've been using
S3: it for ages, is last night, as we've kind of
S3: touched on, we're away, we're in Sydney, we're in a
S3: hotel room. I haven't had the best luck with being
S3: interrupted in my sleep while we've been here, and the
S3: other night someone tried to accidentally get into my door.
S3: I think they were just had a really, really like.
S3: It was like the middle of the night, 2 a.m.
S3: and I heard the car beep card beep on my
S3: door and then the door rattle. And that woke me up.
S3: And it kind of rattled me because I was like,
S3: is there someone in my room? So that was the
S3: other night, last night, what happened? Which literally threw my
S3: heart rate through the roof. Do you remember how we
S3: were getting our hair and make up done in my room? Yes,
S3: at 4:30 a.m.. Yes. And I put the Bluetooth speaker on.
S3: Oh my God. And I connected music. Yes, but it
S3: was really soft, right? Yeah. I woke up to. I'm
S3: talking loud. As loud as a party. Music blasting through
S3: my speaker at 2:30 a.m..
S2: Oh my.
S3: God. And I jumped.
S2: Oh. Of course.
S3: Out of bed. Because it startled me so much. Oh
S3: my God. Like, threw myself at the wall to the
S3: plug because I also couldn't really see much to just
S3: turn it off from the power point. And my heart rate,
S3: because it was. I can't even explain how loud it
S3: was so loud. Like obviously someone was up late listening
S3: to music and it had like disconnected from their speaker
S3: and had like connected to mine or someone else's music.
S2: I thought your phone had music.
S3: No.
S2: My God, that is.
S3: It was music I'd never heard before. And it was.
S3: It was. I honestly was listening for it to two
S3: seconds before I turned it off. So like. But I also,
S3: I think I was also startled because I was like,
S3: if I work in everyone else up around me, like
S3: I wanted to ask you because you're in the room
S3: next to me if you heard anything? But then I
S3: lay back in bed and my heart rate.
S2: Oh.
S3: Because it was just like shock. And so loud was,
S3: oh my God, it.
S2: Literally would have jumped out of bed. Like I would.
S3: Have felt like I was running, like I was like.
S3: So then I was literally doing four part breath in
S3: the bed until I fell asleep. So yeah, bit of
S3: a story there for you, but also great meditation.
S2: Love, I love that. Um, and I'm sorry, that is
S2: really shocking. Took a while to go back. Very unlucky.
S2: That is very unlikely and very unlucky.
S3: Yeah, I feel like Bluetooth speakers in hotels shouldn't be
S3: a thing if you can connect to someone else's room.
S3: What the heck? Yeah, dumb.
S2: Anyway, very small radius only. What's yours? Okay. Love that
S2: for you. No, I love, I love, I love that
S2: breath meditation so much. So I don't love that for you.
S2: That's really startling and horrible. And I'm really sorry you
S2: went through that. Mine's a book. It's called All Fours
S2: by Miranda July. I have just absolutely loved reading it.
S2: It is gorgeous. It's just such a nice read. Anyone
S2: that's read it, a few people have because they people
S2: reply to me on my stories when I shared it,
S2: I can never feel I don't know how I feel
S2: about inserting a tampon anymore. And if you if you know,
S2: you know. Okay.
S3: Oh, God.
S2: It's. I just it's that. The only thing is, I
S2: don't know how I'm going to feel. Okay.
S3: Interesting. Because your period's coming up, so we'll see how
S3: you go.
S2: I know, um, but aside from that, it's a really,
S2: really beautiful read about a woman and her journey and
S2: kind of rediscovering herself. So I highly recommend reading that. Amazing.
S3: Thanks, laws. Okay, well, that's it from us today, guys.
S3: Wednesday's episode is with one of our favorite people, Harry.
S2: Harry Garside, after the Olympics. Yeah.
S3: So look forward to that one. We can't wait to
S3: share that one with you guys. And if you want
S3: to get involved in our Kick Pod Facebook group, we
S3: would absolutely love to have you. And on socials and everything.
S3: And as we said at the top of the podcast, please,
S3: please give us a good rating. If you've enjoyed today's podcast,
S3: we love you guys and we'll chat to you soon.
S2: Love you. Bye!