1 00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:03,590 S1: Listener. 2 00:00:03,680 --> 00:00:07,520 S2: Crackpot acknowledges the traditional owners and custodians of the land 3 00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:10,670 S2: in which we are recording this podcast. The Ulucay Wolen 4 00:00:10,670 --> 00:00:13,250 S2: clan of the Boomerang who were a part of the 5 00:00:13,250 --> 00:00:16,790 S2: Kulin nation. We pay our respects to our elders, past 6 00:00:16,790 --> 00:00:20,030 S2: and present, and extend our respect to Aboriginal and Torres 7 00:00:20,030 --> 00:00:21,920 S2: Strait Islander peoples today. 8 00:00:23,030 --> 00:00:24,829 S3: Welcome to the Kick Pod a. 9 00:00:24,829 --> 00:00:28,220 S2: Damn with your besties on the stuff that matters. One. Two. Three. 10 00:00:28,220 --> 00:00:36,800 UU: Four. One. Two. Three. Four. 11 00:00:37,820 --> 00:00:39,710 S2: Hello? Kick. 12 00:00:39,710 --> 00:00:41,030 S3: Pod tech. Sydney. 13 00:00:41,120 --> 00:00:44,630 S2: Kick. Pod tech. Sydney. It does. We are recording in 14 00:00:44,630 --> 00:00:49,129 S2: Sydney today, guys. Which for your ears is exactly identical. 15 00:00:49,220 --> 00:00:52,879 S2: But we. We just had to. I don't know, it's 16 00:00:52,880 --> 00:00:54,620 S2: not even a confession. Yes. 17 00:00:54,830 --> 00:00:58,160 S3: Producer Lindsay is in our ears instead of over by 18 00:00:58,160 --> 00:00:59,790 S3: the window, which feels very odd. 19 00:00:59,820 --> 00:01:01,620 S2: We keep looking to the window and then I'm like, 20 00:01:01,650 --> 00:01:03,090 S2: oh yes, Lindsay's in Melbourne. 21 00:01:04,650 --> 00:01:07,470 S3: But we are so, so excited to be here. And 22 00:01:07,470 --> 00:01:10,470 S3: we've had such a big week full of very, very 23 00:01:10,470 --> 00:01:13,320 S3: cool and exciting projects, one of which that we actually 24 00:01:13,319 --> 00:01:18,630 S3: announced yesterday. So when we're recording this episode, we have 25 00:01:18,660 --> 00:01:22,289 S3: been up here because we shot for our brand new 26 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:26,700 S3: Stax collection, which is so exciting because we announced yesterday 27 00:01:26,700 --> 00:01:30,389 S3: that we have got another collection. Um, and our affirmation 28 00:01:30,390 --> 00:01:32,460 S3: behind this collection, if you were a fan of the 29 00:01:32,459 --> 00:01:35,340 S3: first one, you would know it was I am enough. 30 00:01:35,340 --> 00:01:37,530 S3: And this one is I can and I will. 31 00:01:37,530 --> 00:01:40,110 S2: It's been so exciting. So the first collection launch in 32 00:01:40,140 --> 00:01:42,300 S2: it was crazy. It's Feb, February February this year. So 33 00:01:42,300 --> 00:01:46,200 S2: six months ago. And everyone it was it was actually 34 00:01:46,230 --> 00:01:49,650 S2: like it exceeded every expectation. It sold out in like 35 00:01:49,650 --> 00:01:52,650 S2: half an hour VIP night which was in 30 minutes. 36 00:01:52,650 --> 00:01:55,560 S2: Then when we went live the next day to everyone 37 00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:57,000 S2: that wasn't in the VIP list, and we're going to 38 00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:58,600 S2: put a link for you to be able to sign 39 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:00,970 S2: up to the VIP list, so you can be on that. 40 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:03,100 S2: It's like a VIP list. It's hard to get on, 41 00:02:03,130 --> 00:02:04,690 S2: like you can sign up to it so you get 42 00:02:04,690 --> 00:02:09,340 S2: early access to the collection before because it is likely 43 00:02:09,340 --> 00:02:11,140 S2: we have we have got more this time because we 44 00:02:11,139 --> 00:02:12,580 S2: want to make sure there's enough for everyone, but it 45 00:02:12,580 --> 00:02:14,560 S2: is it. Just in case it does sell out, make 46 00:02:14,590 --> 00:02:17,080 S2: sure you sign up to the VIP list. But it 47 00:02:17,080 --> 00:02:19,390 S2: was crazy. Like it sold out so quickly and you 48 00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:21,910 S2: guys just loved it. And having being able to work 49 00:02:21,910 --> 00:02:24,730 S2: with the amazing Don until the Stax founders again on 50 00:02:24,730 --> 00:02:28,000 S2: another collection and the incredible Stax team has been so 51 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,310 S2: awesome because we have been able to build in all 52 00:02:30,310 --> 00:02:33,970 S2: of the feedback from the first collection. And we've also 53 00:02:34,000 --> 00:02:37,720 S2: worked with Don and till on new designs that Stax 54 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,990 S2: have actually never done before either. And there are two tops, 55 00:02:40,990 --> 00:02:44,890 S2: so we've got a halter neck crop. So it's a 56 00:02:44,889 --> 00:02:47,680 S2: sports bra. That's a halter neck. Yeah, it is now. 57 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:50,290 S2: It's not super light support. Light support. Exactly. Right. Like 58 00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:52,329 S2: it's not not for running but for the gym and stuff. 59 00:02:52,330 --> 00:02:56,090 S2: It looks so, so hot. It is so good. And 60 00:02:56,090 --> 00:02:58,010 S2: I was like, oh, I don't know if I wear 61 00:02:58,010 --> 00:03:00,320 S2: a halter neck sports bra because like when we were 62 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:01,910 S2: doing the fitting, I was like, oh, this will be 63 00:03:01,910 --> 00:03:03,800 S2: maybe more like a Steph one, I don't know. I just, 64 00:03:03,800 --> 00:03:05,870 S2: I was like, I don't know how I'll feel in it. No, 65 00:03:05,870 --> 00:03:09,560 S2: it looks so good. I walked out and I was like, oh, guys. 66 00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:13,339 S2: Feeling myself like, I know 100 bucks, a million bucks, 67 00:03:13,340 --> 00:03:16,070 S2: 10 million bucks. What am I saying? But it's just 68 00:03:16,070 --> 00:03:17,840 S2: the way we work so hard on making sure it 69 00:03:17,840 --> 00:03:20,930 S2: was this. The way the V shape, the perfect amount 70 00:03:20,930 --> 00:03:26,480 S2: of kind of lowness, the ribbed, um, flexible waistband, the 71 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,910 S2: amount of kind of. It doesn't. I really don't like 72 00:03:28,910 --> 00:03:31,610 S2: sports bras that pull a lot like halterneck that pull 73 00:03:31,610 --> 00:03:34,970 S2: on your, your neck. Exactly. And so we've made sure 74 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:37,280 S2: like we've just, we've done it's super soft and it 75 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:39,650 S2: is in the premium seamless fabric. That's what's really exciting. 76 00:03:39,650 --> 00:03:42,980 S2: So our last collection was in spandex. This one is 77 00:03:42,980 --> 00:03:47,420 S2: in seamless. The whole collection stacks is famous for their seamless. 78 00:03:47,420 --> 00:03:50,120 S2: It is such good quality. It's incredible. So we are 79 00:03:50,120 --> 00:03:53,390 S2: just so excited for you to wear it. Yeah. 80 00:03:53,420 --> 00:03:53,720 S3: And it's. 81 00:03:53,730 --> 00:03:54,180 S2: Blue. 82 00:03:54,210 --> 00:03:55,200 S3: It's blue? Yeah. 83 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:57,840 S2: And black and cream. And it's. It's just gorgeous and blue. 84 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,750 S2: Just makes me feel joyful. So. No, it's just to 85 00:04:00,780 --> 00:04:02,640 S2: share this with you. We just hope you love it 86 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:03,630 S2: as much as we do. 87 00:04:03,660 --> 00:04:07,020 S3: Yes. And the collection will officially be live on Friday 88 00:04:07,050 --> 00:04:10,710 S3: the 13th of September. And also as we did last 89 00:04:10,710 --> 00:04:14,040 S3: time as well to celebrate this Friday. It is this Friday. 90 00:04:14,310 --> 00:04:16,650 S2: Yes. So this week guys, and the, the early um, 91 00:04:16,680 --> 00:04:19,950 S2: the early access is Thursday evening. So make sure you 92 00:04:19,980 --> 00:04:22,410 S2: sign up and then you'll get that access for this 93 00:04:22,410 --> 00:04:23,789 S2: Thursday night and then yeah live. 94 00:04:23,820 --> 00:04:24,480 S3: For everyone else. 95 00:04:24,510 --> 00:04:26,760 S2: On Friday. But last time there was hardly anything left 96 00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:28,169 S2: as we said. So just make sure you sign up 97 00:04:28,170 --> 00:04:28,680 S2: to VIP. 98 00:04:28,710 --> 00:04:31,529 S3: Exactly. Um, but to celebrate the launch, we are also 99 00:04:31,529 --> 00:04:33,989 S3: hosting an event in Melbourne. So last time we did 100 00:04:33,990 --> 00:04:35,970 S3: an event in Sydney decided to do it in our 101 00:04:35,970 --> 00:04:39,000 S3: home town of Melbourne. This time around, next Saturday, the 102 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,820 S3: 21st of September, we've got a panel chat with the 103 00:04:41,820 --> 00:04:44,940 S3: two of us and Don and till and an empowering 104 00:04:44,940 --> 00:04:47,909 S3: workshop which, if you were from Sydney and came to 105 00:04:47,940 --> 00:04:50,729 S3: the first one we had, we had so many really 106 00:04:50,730 --> 00:04:53,360 S3: positive reviews from the workshop that we did, and also 107 00:04:53,360 --> 00:04:55,789 S3: for us, it was probably one of the most rewarding 108 00:04:55,790 --> 00:04:57,409 S3: things we've got to do at an event, so we 109 00:04:57,410 --> 00:04:59,359 S3: are so looking forward to that and can't wait to 110 00:04:59,360 --> 00:05:02,150 S3: see you all there. But we will pop a link 111 00:05:02,150 --> 00:05:04,370 S3: in the show notes for early Access, but we'll also 112 00:05:04,370 --> 00:05:07,310 S3: pop a link in there to secure your spot if 113 00:05:07,310 --> 00:05:12,620 S3: you would like to come along to that event in Melbourne. Okay, 114 00:05:12,620 --> 00:05:16,040 S3: so we are chatting about cheating again because a couple 115 00:05:16,070 --> 00:05:19,250 S3: of episodes ago now, we spoke about whether or not 116 00:05:19,250 --> 00:05:22,280 S3: cheating was a deal breaker. And laws and I, we 117 00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:25,400 S3: shared our opinion. Um, and then we jumped onto our 118 00:05:25,400 --> 00:05:28,219 S3: Instagram and also in our Facebook group. And quite a 119 00:05:28,220 --> 00:05:31,339 S3: lot of you disagreed with us, which, you know, all 120 00:05:31,339 --> 00:05:34,370 S3: open to all opinions. But we thought there's more to 121 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:39,380 S3: this and it's worth getting our expert on Megan Luscomb 122 00:05:39,380 --> 00:05:42,800 S3: to talk through how she might have helped clients through this. 123 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,510 S3: And so. Hello, Megan. 124 00:05:44,540 --> 00:05:46,160 S4: Hello. Hello my love. 125 00:05:46,190 --> 00:05:48,440 S3: I got so excited when I saw your comment on 126 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:51,470 S3: the video, but also very nervous about what your thoughts 127 00:05:51,470 --> 00:05:53,510 S3: were going to be on our opinion because I was like, 128 00:05:53,540 --> 00:05:56,960 S3: I hope we did her proud, but I would love 129 00:05:56,960 --> 00:06:00,650 S3: to know what do you think? Like how how what 130 00:06:00,650 --> 00:06:02,960 S3: have you worked through with clients when cheating comes up? 131 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:04,310 S3: Is it a deal breaker? 132 00:06:05,150 --> 00:06:07,640 S4: Um, look, I will say more often than not, no, 133 00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:12,529 S4: it's not a deal breaker. I, I think, um, both 134 00:06:12,529 --> 00:06:18,110 S4: of you made really good points regarding the nuance of infidelity. 135 00:06:18,110 --> 00:06:21,409 S4: And I think what's really important to clarify is that 136 00:06:21,410 --> 00:06:25,610 S4: cheating is a term has evolved so much over, I 137 00:06:25,610 --> 00:06:29,060 S4: would say, the past maybe 5 to 10 years when 138 00:06:29,060 --> 00:06:32,450 S4: I was a teen, cheating was you were having sex 139 00:06:32,450 --> 00:06:36,560 S4: with somebody else. Whereas now the term has really evolved 140 00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:40,220 S4: into people using cheating for their partner, following someone on 141 00:06:40,220 --> 00:06:44,299 S4: social media that they don't like having relationships with other 142 00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:47,990 S4: gender they're attracted to. So I think what's really important 143 00:06:47,990 --> 00:06:51,150 S4: to remember is when one person uses the term cheating, 144 00:06:51,150 --> 00:06:54,990 S4: it may not necessarily apply in the same way that 145 00:06:54,990 --> 00:06:58,620 S4: another person means cheating. And I think it's so important 146 00:06:58,620 --> 00:07:01,169 S4: that we can all sort of hold space for that, 147 00:07:01,170 --> 00:07:04,529 S4: because I know with clients that I've worked with, somebody 148 00:07:04,560 --> 00:07:06,089 S4: has booked a session with me and said, oh, my 149 00:07:06,089 --> 00:07:10,410 S4: partner cheated on me. And based on how I expressed 150 00:07:10,410 --> 00:07:13,530 S4: the word cheating, my assumption is you're speaking about they've 151 00:07:13,530 --> 00:07:17,130 S4: had sexual intercourse with somebody who wasn't you. And when 152 00:07:17,130 --> 00:07:20,040 S4: we started the session, they let me know that their 153 00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:23,070 S4: partner had been talking to somebody else who they weren't 154 00:07:23,070 --> 00:07:28,560 S4: romantically involved with. So that, to me, is something that 155 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:31,500 S4: we all really need to start having conversations about is 156 00:07:31,500 --> 00:07:34,440 S4: when we say cheating, what are we explicitly meaning? 157 00:07:35,130 --> 00:07:38,910 S2: Oh, absolutely. And Megan, you said as well that as 158 00:07:38,910 --> 00:07:41,370 S2: you said, it's not it doesn't have to be a 159 00:07:41,370 --> 00:07:44,820 S2: deal breaker. No. Now, very interestingly, we did a poll 160 00:07:44,820 --> 00:07:49,730 S2: on our Instagram and only 2% of people voted that 161 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:53,150 S2: it like agreed with us that it wasn't. It doesn't 162 00:07:53,150 --> 00:07:56,000 S2: have to be a deal breaker now. 30% said they 163 00:07:56,000 --> 00:07:58,489 S2: were kind of on the fence like it depend on 164 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:02,480 S2: it depended on the circumstances. And then 63% said it 165 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:08,420 S2: was a deal breaker. Yeah for sure. In your experience 166 00:08:08,420 --> 00:08:11,090 S2: within all of all of your clients, obviously there's so 167 00:08:11,090 --> 00:08:16,610 S2: many different circumstances where cheating can occur. Yeah, absolutely. Are 168 00:08:16,610 --> 00:08:20,480 S2: there instances where because something that came through in the comments, 169 00:08:20,480 --> 00:08:22,760 S2: it was quite interesting. Like Steph and I spoke a 170 00:08:22,760 --> 00:08:25,250 S2: little bit about an affair. Like for me personally, I 171 00:08:25,250 --> 00:08:27,530 S2: don't think I could come back from my partner having 172 00:08:27,530 --> 00:08:30,440 S2: an affair. And then also a few people said if 173 00:08:30,440 --> 00:08:32,330 S2: it was like a kiss and a nightclub, they could 174 00:08:32,330 --> 00:08:34,189 S2: get through it. But if it was any more than that, 175 00:08:34,220 --> 00:08:38,780 S2: they couldn't. Yeah. What circumstances have you. Are there any 176 00:08:38,780 --> 00:08:42,350 S2: kind of specific circumstances that you see where cheating does occur? 177 00:08:42,350 --> 00:08:44,850 S2: And it does tend to be a pattern and the 178 00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:47,700 S2: relationship can't come back from that. 179 00:08:48,390 --> 00:08:51,720 S4: Yeah. Look, I think what's when most people come to 180 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:55,560 S4: me regarding cheating, it's because they want to repair, they 181 00:08:55,559 --> 00:08:59,160 S4: want to make the relationship work. And from all the 182 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:01,830 S4: people that I've worked with when it comes to infidelity, 183 00:09:01,830 --> 00:09:04,230 S4: they haven't just woken up one day and decided to 184 00:09:04,260 --> 00:09:07,590 S4: cheat on their partner. They've been going through something. The 185 00:09:07,590 --> 00:09:10,770 S4: relationship's been going through something the individuals have been going through, 186 00:09:10,770 --> 00:09:13,530 S4: something the people I've worked with haven't cheated from a 187 00:09:13,530 --> 00:09:15,780 S4: place of maliciousness. And I know some people listening to 188 00:09:15,809 --> 00:09:18,390 S4: this will go well. Cheating is malicious, but I think 189 00:09:18,390 --> 00:09:22,440 S4: it's really important to remember that humans are humans and 190 00:09:22,440 --> 00:09:26,850 S4: we're not all perfect, and we make mistakes, and we 191 00:09:26,850 --> 00:09:30,420 S4: do things that sometimes we don't think we would. And 192 00:09:30,420 --> 00:09:33,360 S4: it needs to be talked about from a place of situational. 193 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:35,910 S4: And that's where the nuance comes in. And I think 194 00:09:36,210 --> 00:09:40,170 S4: when Steph, you were saying that, you know, people can 195 00:09:40,170 --> 00:09:44,199 S4: be in dark places and like things happen. I think 196 00:09:44,230 --> 00:09:47,170 S4: that conversation is something we need to be talking about more. 197 00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:49,929 S4: But also, I think, Laura, when you were saying the 198 00:09:49,929 --> 00:09:52,809 S4: affair and that you may not be able to come 199 00:09:52,809 --> 00:09:55,179 S4: back from that, and it's because in the scenarios you're 200 00:09:55,179 --> 00:09:57,400 S4: talking about, a fear is when we're talking about long 201 00:09:57,429 --> 00:10:00,490 S4: term and we're generally talking about a relationship. So it's 202 00:10:00,490 --> 00:10:02,740 S4: not even an affair anymore. You're having a relationship with 203 00:10:02,740 --> 00:10:07,420 S4: somebody else, and that's for people can be harder to 204 00:10:07,450 --> 00:10:10,990 S4: come back from because now it's you've changed the dynamic 205 00:10:10,990 --> 00:10:14,170 S4: of us, and now you've turned to somebody else as 206 00:10:14,170 --> 00:10:16,030 S4: opposed to me, who is the person who was your 207 00:10:16,030 --> 00:10:18,940 S4: primary person and so on and so forth. Whereas for 208 00:10:18,940 --> 00:10:22,000 S4: some people, cheating is a one off experience. I'm not 209 00:10:22,000 --> 00:10:23,590 S4: saying this is across the board and this is how 210 00:10:23,590 --> 00:10:25,210 S4: it happens all the time. I'm just using this as 211 00:10:25,210 --> 00:10:28,480 S4: an example for now. For some people they may go, oh, 212 00:10:28,510 --> 00:10:32,770 S4: I cheated. Once I gave, I had a cheeky pash 213 00:10:32,770 --> 00:10:35,349 S4: with somebody in the bar and it'll never happen again. 214 00:10:35,350 --> 00:10:38,410 S4: Whereas somebody else saying, I've been having an affair for 215 00:10:38,410 --> 00:10:42,709 S4: 3 to 4 years, that can be very different and 216 00:10:42,710 --> 00:10:45,950 S4: I think every different. There are so many different and 217 00:10:45,950 --> 00:10:50,360 S4: varied scenarios. And what I do see often is the 218 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:55,010 S4: people who often have a black and white, um, like, no, 219 00:10:55,010 --> 00:10:57,920 S4: I could never like kidding is a deal breaker. Um, 220 00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:00,469 S4: I think sometimes they're speaking from a place of they 221 00:11:00,470 --> 00:11:05,060 S4: haven't been through the experience, so they're able to go, no, 222 00:11:05,059 --> 00:11:08,780 S4: it's a deal breaker for me because they're not on the, um, 223 00:11:08,809 --> 00:11:12,860 S4: the situation of having gone through it. And I think 224 00:11:12,860 --> 00:11:16,190 S4: people who go through it, um, probably are able to 225 00:11:16,190 --> 00:11:19,819 S4: speak to more of the nuance of that. It's not 226 00:11:19,820 --> 00:11:22,609 S4: simply black and white in all cases. 227 00:11:22,670 --> 00:11:25,550 S3: Yeah, it's so true. And I mean, outside of talking 228 00:11:25,580 --> 00:11:29,720 S3: to an expert like yourself, if someone is listening and 229 00:11:29,720 --> 00:11:32,750 S3: they've gone through this and maybe they're trying to work 230 00:11:32,750 --> 00:11:34,850 S3: through if they can stay with their partner or not, 231 00:11:34,850 --> 00:11:36,650 S3: and kind of make that decision on whether that's going 232 00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:39,390 S3: to come back, what would you say? Obviously, outside of 233 00:11:39,390 --> 00:11:43,440 S3: being very open with their partner. What what would you 234 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:45,570 S3: say to. Yeah. To do or to try and figure 235 00:11:45,570 --> 00:11:47,579 S3: out if it's going to be if you're going to 236 00:11:47,580 --> 00:11:50,100 S3: be able to kind of trust them again. And that 237 00:11:50,100 --> 00:11:51,870 S3: relationship can work long term. 238 00:11:51,990 --> 00:11:52,590 S5: Yeah. 239 00:11:52,620 --> 00:11:56,430 S4: It takes a lot of, uh, introspection, but it also 240 00:11:56,429 --> 00:11:58,440 S4: takes a lot of accountability for the quality of the 241 00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:02,100 S4: relationship and the quality of the people in the relationship. 242 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:04,590 S4: So what I would say is, if you are going 243 00:12:04,590 --> 00:12:07,140 S4: through it and you're wondering, can we come out the 244 00:12:07,140 --> 00:12:10,500 S4: other side? It's being able to analyze where the relationship 245 00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:13,679 S4: was and the quality of it leading up to the 246 00:12:13,830 --> 00:12:15,450 S4: I'm just going to say the incident. I'm just going 247 00:12:15,480 --> 00:12:18,240 S4: to assume that it's a one off in this circumstance 248 00:12:18,240 --> 00:12:20,880 S4: and working out how you were both showing up in 249 00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:25,110 S4: the relationship as individuals, but as a couple before the 250 00:12:25,110 --> 00:12:27,929 S4: incident took place. It also then relies on the person 251 00:12:27,929 --> 00:12:30,870 S4: who engaged in the cheating to be able to take 252 00:12:30,870 --> 00:12:33,660 S4: accountability theirself and do the work on themselves in order 253 00:12:33,660 --> 00:12:35,760 S4: to be able to face whatever they're going through to 254 00:12:35,790 --> 00:12:38,440 S4: ensure that they can grow and evolve and come out 255 00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:40,929 S4: the other side. Because even though the saying is once 256 00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:46,360 S4: a cheater, always a cheater, that's completely, fundamentally incorrect because 257 00:12:46,360 --> 00:12:49,690 S4: we can't say that humans evolve and humans can change, 258 00:12:49,690 --> 00:12:51,880 S4: and we can't say that people can change without also 259 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:55,120 S4: saying that somebody who has cheated can also have the 260 00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:58,360 S4: capacity to no longer do it. What I will say 261 00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:02,410 S4: there are some people who are not meant to be monogamous. 262 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:07,329 S4: Some people are more inclined to be in open relationships 263 00:13:07,330 --> 00:13:10,420 S4: and to be polyamorous. And I think sometimes it's worth 264 00:13:10,420 --> 00:13:13,479 S4: having those conversations as well. I think we all put 265 00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:16,300 S4: a pressure on ourselves to be in a monogamous mindset, 266 00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:19,390 S4: because we are in a very heavily monogamous society. But 267 00:13:19,390 --> 00:13:22,720 S4: I think sometimes it's important that people also just peel 268 00:13:22,720 --> 00:13:25,210 S4: the layer back a little bit and ask themselves, is 269 00:13:25,210 --> 00:13:27,370 S4: this structure what I want? Is this something that aligns 270 00:13:27,370 --> 00:13:29,559 S4: with me and to sort of have a conversation from 271 00:13:29,559 --> 00:13:31,990 S4: that standpoint, but be kind to yourself and each other 272 00:13:31,990 --> 00:13:35,809 S4: because it's um, it's a really emotionally loaded Topic. 273 00:13:35,929 --> 00:13:38,240 S2: That is very I mean, as always, Megan, when is 274 00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:42,050 S2: it ever not good advice from you? That is that 275 00:13:42,050 --> 00:13:44,750 S2: is very, very good advice. And we actually have a 276 00:13:44,750 --> 00:13:48,320 S2: question from a listener that has come up that we're 277 00:13:48,320 --> 00:13:50,600 S2: going to ask you now. And it actually it's really 278 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:53,660 S2: interesting because your definition of I originally read it and 279 00:13:53,660 --> 00:13:55,969 S2: I was like, that's not I didn't think of cheating 280 00:13:55,970 --> 00:13:59,600 S2: when I read it, but by your definition of cheating, 281 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:02,270 S2: I actually think that, I mean, depending on the person 282 00:14:02,270 --> 00:14:05,900 S2: it could come into for them. Like obviously everyone is different, 283 00:14:05,900 --> 00:14:08,750 S2: but it could come in the kind of wide, wide range. 284 00:14:08,750 --> 00:14:12,650 S2: So yeah, our community member has said, I fairly innocently 285 00:14:12,650 --> 00:14:15,350 S2: look through my partner's photos on his phone to try 286 00:14:15,350 --> 00:14:18,110 S2: to see if he had any screenshots or saved images 287 00:14:18,110 --> 00:14:22,220 S2: of engagement rings that I'd been hinting at. Hahahahah! I 288 00:14:22,220 --> 00:14:26,180 S2: came across some old, very explicit and intimate videos of 289 00:14:26,180 --> 00:14:28,940 S2: him and his ex from a few years ago. He 290 00:14:28,940 --> 00:14:33,230 S2: doesn't speak to his ex and this relationship ended badly. 291 00:14:33,230 --> 00:14:35,880 S2: I've never looked through his phone before as I've never 292 00:14:35,880 --> 00:14:39,660 S2: felt the need to. And trust him wholeheartedly. I feel 293 00:14:39,690 --> 00:14:42,330 S2: bad for going through his phone, but now I feel 294 00:14:42,330 --> 00:14:44,190 S2: sick and I don't know how to bring up that. 295 00:14:44,190 --> 00:14:47,070 S2: I've seen these videos and then the listener is asking, 296 00:14:47,070 --> 00:14:50,310 S2: how do I tell him to delete them? And I 297 00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:54,450 S2: would maybe ask you, is that the next step, or 298 00:14:54,450 --> 00:14:58,890 S2: is there a conversation about it before action is taken? 299 00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:03,480 S4: Oh, wow. Isn't this, uh, isn't this a relatable, uh, 300 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:07,350 S4: behavior that going through your partner's phone, right? I think 301 00:15:07,350 --> 00:15:09,480 S4: a lot of people listening to this will probably go, 302 00:15:09,510 --> 00:15:11,430 S4: I've done this before. I mean, this was definitely me 303 00:15:11,430 --> 00:15:13,110 S4: when I was like 18 to 21. I mean, I'm 304 00:15:13,140 --> 00:15:16,320 S4: nearly 40 now, so a long time since I've done it, 305 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:18,600 S4: but I can relate to the motivations of doing it. 306 00:15:18,630 --> 00:15:20,640 S4: I think what's really important to remember is we need 307 00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:23,040 S4: to acknowledge that behavior, because going through your partner's phone 308 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:26,100 S4: without their knowledge, it's not an innocent action. It never. 309 00:15:26,100 --> 00:15:26,610 S5: Is. 310 00:15:26,640 --> 00:15:29,910 S4: If we're doing something without our partner's consent, that's not 311 00:15:29,910 --> 00:15:31,740 S4: an innocent action. As much as we can say to 312 00:15:31,740 --> 00:15:34,510 S4: ourselves that all we had, you know, we had good motives, 313 00:15:34,540 --> 00:15:37,000 S4: you know. Well, if you were doing it without their knowledge, 314 00:15:37,030 --> 00:15:40,510 S4: that's actually that's a trust issue in itself. And I 315 00:15:40,510 --> 00:15:42,340 S4: think we all need to be able to acknowledge that. 316 00:15:42,340 --> 00:15:45,280 S4: And I know so many people get very frustrated with 317 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,830 S4: me when I say going through your partner's phone is 318 00:15:47,830 --> 00:15:50,530 S4: a no no, and you should never do that, because 319 00:15:50,530 --> 00:15:52,450 S4: what I usually hear back is, oh, well, if they've 320 00:15:52,450 --> 00:15:55,060 S4: got nothing to hide, then they won't care. That's not 321 00:15:55,060 --> 00:15:58,930 S4: the point. The point is, everybody deserves privacy, and they 322 00:15:58,930 --> 00:16:01,540 S4: deserve to have things that they that are their own. 323 00:16:01,540 --> 00:16:04,060 S4: And sure, if your partner lets you go through their 324 00:16:04,060 --> 00:16:06,190 S4: phone and you both share passwords and things like that, 325 00:16:06,190 --> 00:16:08,860 S4: that's totally fine. And I'm all for that. If that's 326 00:16:08,860 --> 00:16:11,350 S4: a consensual agreement within your relationship, but to do it 327 00:16:11,350 --> 00:16:14,020 S4: without their knowledge, that's a trust break and it's a 328 00:16:14,020 --> 00:16:16,690 S4: boundary break. And I think it's important that the person 329 00:16:16,690 --> 00:16:19,120 S4: who sent this through can sort of take that self-accountability 330 00:16:19,120 --> 00:16:21,940 S4: and go. Actually, that wasn't an innocent. 331 00:16:22,150 --> 00:16:22,840 S5: Motivation. 332 00:16:22,840 --> 00:16:26,200 S4: For me. I was doing something without telling them. But 333 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:28,660 S4: I think the next step is you've got to decide 334 00:16:28,660 --> 00:16:29,320 S4: whether you're going to. 335 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:29,890 S5: Tell. 336 00:16:30,510 --> 00:16:35,340 S4: Now before anyone's like, oh, you know, Megan's condoning secrets. 337 00:16:35,340 --> 00:16:39,990 S4: I think it's always important to reflect on whether you're 338 00:16:39,990 --> 00:16:41,640 S4: going to bring up what you found out, because you 339 00:16:41,640 --> 00:16:44,790 S4: need to actually start considering the values and the relationship 340 00:16:44,790 --> 00:16:48,000 S4: values before you make a decision. And what I'm saying 341 00:16:48,000 --> 00:16:51,180 S4: in that is a lot of the time we will 342 00:16:51,180 --> 00:16:54,119 S4: disclose behaviors and things that we've done, not from a 343 00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:57,480 S4: place because we want to mend and we want to 344 00:16:57,480 --> 00:16:59,880 S4: grow stronger, and we want the relationship to become better. 345 00:16:59,880 --> 00:17:03,540 S4: But we disclose from a place of guilt alleviation. We 346 00:17:03,540 --> 00:17:05,760 S4: feel bad and we want to feel better about what 347 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:09,810 S4: we've done, so we disclose that. So it's about being 348 00:17:09,810 --> 00:17:13,139 S4: able to identify. Am I disclosing because I need to 349 00:17:13,170 --> 00:17:16,469 S4: relieve my guilt for doing something that I know that 350 00:17:16,470 --> 00:17:20,340 S4: I shouldn't have done, and because now I actually want 351 00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:23,669 S4: them to do something with what I found out or 352 00:17:23,670 --> 00:17:26,790 S4: I made, or am I disclosing because I want to 353 00:17:26,820 --> 00:17:29,880 S4: integrate this into the relationship as a new standard or 354 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:33,030 S4: expectation of we shouldn't be going through our phones without 355 00:17:33,030 --> 00:17:36,750 S4: each other's knowledge. That's a really that's a really poor 356 00:17:36,780 --> 00:17:38,880 S4: behavior that we don't want. And maybe we now need 357 00:17:38,880 --> 00:17:42,240 S4: to have a bigger conversation about what we are putting 358 00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:46,470 S4: on our phones, relating to our past. Does that make sense? 359 00:17:46,470 --> 00:17:48,209 S4: What I just said, no, it does. 360 00:17:48,240 --> 00:17:50,880 S3: And I think like there's a good there's a good 361 00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:53,520 S3: chance that like, he's forgotten that all of that content's 362 00:17:53,550 --> 00:17:55,979 S3: even on there. So it's like once she if she 363 00:17:55,980 --> 00:17:58,020 S3: wants to bring it up, as you said, now she's 364 00:17:58,020 --> 00:17:59,790 S3: got to decide if it's something that she wants to 365 00:17:59,790 --> 00:18:03,630 S3: bring up. But, you know, it's you know, once that 366 00:18:03,630 --> 00:18:07,470 S3: decision has been made, like he could turn around and 367 00:18:07,470 --> 00:18:09,600 S3: be like, oh my God, I didn't even know that 368 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:11,760 S3: they were still on there. Of course I can get 369 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:15,030 S3: rid of them. Yeah. Um, but yeah, it's an interesting also, 370 00:18:15,060 --> 00:18:15,449 S3: I could he. 371 00:18:15,450 --> 00:18:17,610 S4: Could also turn around and feel very deceived. 372 00:18:17,640 --> 00:18:18,960 S3: Yes. Totally. 373 00:18:18,990 --> 00:18:20,070 S5: Very true. Yeah. 374 00:18:20,100 --> 00:18:23,580 S4: I don't have a wrong versus right. Whether you should 375 00:18:23,580 --> 00:18:26,429 S4: disclose whether you shouldn't I don't I'm not the, you 376 00:18:26,590 --> 00:18:29,320 S4: judge and jury here. I think everybody has their own autonomy. 377 00:18:29,320 --> 00:18:31,900 S4: But I do think it's important to always be introspective 378 00:18:31,900 --> 00:18:34,960 S4: and unpack your motivations for why you're going to do 379 00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:37,449 S4: something before you do it 100%. 380 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:41,350 S2: Now, I don't know if this question is me thinking 381 00:18:41,350 --> 00:18:44,740 S2: about it in a black and white way, but if 382 00:18:44,740 --> 00:18:50,290 S2: he was watching the videos hypothetically regularly. 383 00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:50,889 S5: Yep. 384 00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:56,020 S2: How would for this person is that a breach of 385 00:18:56,020 --> 00:18:59,830 S2: trust within a relationship? Obviously it depends on on the people. 386 00:18:59,859 --> 00:19:02,290 S2: I don't I feel like if my husband was watching 387 00:19:02,290 --> 00:19:05,620 S2: videos of him having sex with other partners while we 388 00:19:05,619 --> 00:19:08,890 S2: were together, I would actually find that really uncomfortable. 389 00:19:08,920 --> 00:19:12,010 S4: Yeah, I think it's okay to feel, and I absolutely 390 00:19:12,010 --> 00:19:14,080 S4: think it's okay to feel uncomfortable about these things. It's 391 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:15,190 S4: okay to. 392 00:19:15,490 --> 00:19:16,180 S5: Go. 393 00:19:16,210 --> 00:19:19,060 S4: Oh, that feels really icky. I that doesn't feel good 394 00:19:19,060 --> 00:19:21,730 S4: within me and that feels icky. It's okay to feel 395 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:23,770 S4: all of those things, but it's also important that we 396 00:19:23,770 --> 00:19:26,070 S4: need to acknowledge that our partner had a past, and 397 00:19:26,070 --> 00:19:28,380 S4: that past involved things that didn't have anything to do 398 00:19:28,380 --> 00:19:33,780 S4: with us. And if they're watching content on about their past, 399 00:19:33,780 --> 00:19:37,740 S4: that's that's actually still their prerogative to do it. And 400 00:19:37,740 --> 00:19:42,510 S4: I get that that feels icky. But my, my whole, 401 00:19:42,540 --> 00:19:45,000 S4: you know, empowerment for people is we need to respect 402 00:19:45,000 --> 00:19:48,270 S4: autonomy and we need to respect that our partners are 403 00:19:48,270 --> 00:19:52,800 S4: people that exist without us and without our influence. And 404 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,680 S4: they have past that don't involve us. And they're entitled 405 00:19:55,710 --> 00:19:59,370 S4: to have those moments of their past in ways that 406 00:19:59,369 --> 00:20:03,060 S4: serve them. And I know that feels really uncomfortable, and 407 00:20:03,060 --> 00:20:06,179 S4: I know it feels really conflicting, but that's what a 408 00:20:06,180 --> 00:20:10,830 S4: relationship really needs in order to have trust and to 409 00:20:10,859 --> 00:20:13,830 S4: have a connection of togetherness. It's being able to have 410 00:20:13,830 --> 00:20:18,959 S4: this respect and to and to know that our partner is. 411 00:20:19,590 --> 00:20:19,889 S5: Still. 412 00:20:19,890 --> 00:20:22,020 S4: Showing up in the relationship and obviously committed to us, 413 00:20:22,020 --> 00:20:24,960 S4: but they also are able to have thoughts and things 414 00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,780 S4: about their past that still have nothing to do with us. 415 00:20:27,780 --> 00:20:29,580 S4: And I get it. That feels icky. And I know 416 00:20:29,580 --> 00:20:31,020 S4: a lot of people are probably going to listen to 417 00:20:31,020 --> 00:20:34,770 S4: this and be like, stop that. I get it. It 418 00:20:34,770 --> 00:20:37,230 S4: feels confronting and it feels really conflicting, but it doesn't 419 00:20:37,230 --> 00:20:39,419 S4: mean that it's not something we need to start, you know, 420 00:20:39,450 --> 00:20:41,490 S4: considering and thinking about seriously. 421 00:20:41,609 --> 00:20:42,479 S6: I love it. 422 00:20:42,510 --> 00:20:46,530 S3: I just every time, every time we call you that. 423 00:20:46,530 --> 00:20:50,520 S2: Is very, very good advice. And I think to our listener, 424 00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:53,939 S2: I hope that helps. And yeah, so it's just now 425 00:20:53,940 --> 00:20:56,700 S2: to think about if you want to have the conversation 426 00:20:56,700 --> 00:20:59,760 S2: or not. Megan, one last thing. Just on this, I 427 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:04,020 S2: apologize for going back into it. But if for this listener, 428 00:21:04,020 --> 00:21:05,970 S2: they because I think if it was me, I think 429 00:21:05,970 --> 00:21:08,070 S2: where I'd really struggle is if I, if I did 430 00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:10,020 S2: find it and I was worried like, oh, is he 431 00:21:10,050 --> 00:21:13,920 S2: watching this? I don't know all of those thoughts. It's 432 00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:18,149 S2: this battle with living with this knowledge that you now have, 433 00:21:18,180 --> 00:21:22,990 S2: but also obviously Navigating. Well, I have been. I've deceived 434 00:21:22,990 --> 00:21:25,900 S2: my partner because I have gone on their phone without 435 00:21:25,900 --> 00:21:28,360 S2: asking them, and they didn't know that. And that's a 436 00:21:28,359 --> 00:21:30,760 S2: that's a breach of trust in itself. 437 00:21:30,790 --> 00:21:31,359 S5: Yeah. 438 00:21:31,780 --> 00:21:34,540 S2: If for this listener, they kind of they decide that 439 00:21:34,540 --> 00:21:36,459 S2: you know what. No, I shouldn't have gone on the 440 00:21:36,460 --> 00:21:39,310 S2: phone without, you know, asking. But then it gets to 441 00:21:39,340 --> 00:21:41,560 S2: a month and this is like just eating them inside. 442 00:21:41,560 --> 00:21:43,690 S2: And they think about it every time they see their partner. 443 00:21:43,690 --> 00:21:45,340 S2: Is that at a point where you would. Because I 444 00:21:45,340 --> 00:21:46,959 S2: think that would be really hard if you you want 445 00:21:46,990 --> 00:21:48,970 S2: to have trust in your relationship. But I think the 446 00:21:48,970 --> 00:21:50,860 S2: hardest thing and this is why maybe we don't we 447 00:21:50,859 --> 00:21:53,230 S2: shouldn't go through people's phones is that once, you know, 448 00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:58,869 S2: have new information, it's fucking so hard to unsee it. 449 00:21:58,869 --> 00:22:01,960 S2: And it, like, takes over your whole body. Yeah. 450 00:22:01,990 --> 00:22:04,780 S4: Yeah, that's exactly right. And I think, I think there 451 00:22:04,780 --> 00:22:06,880 S4: are probably two ways that I would say for this 452 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:08,919 S4: listener to really start thinking about it. If they want 453 00:22:08,950 --> 00:22:11,560 S4: to disclose. Go for it. But it's always important to 454 00:22:11,590 --> 00:22:13,810 S4: fall on your sword. When we fall on our sword, 455 00:22:13,810 --> 00:22:16,209 S4: we take accountability for our own actions, and then we 456 00:22:16,210 --> 00:22:19,800 S4: do the olive branch of how can we rebuild and repair? Okay, 457 00:22:19,830 --> 00:22:21,810 S4: so that's the. I shouldn't have gone through your phone. 458 00:22:21,810 --> 00:22:25,889 S4: I'm sorry. However, what I found is been really confronting for. 459 00:22:25,890 --> 00:22:26,490 S5: Me. 460 00:22:27,030 --> 00:22:30,600 S4: And ABC. Now, we can't explicitly ask our partner to 461 00:22:30,630 --> 00:22:32,520 S4: remove things from their phones. They have nothing to do 462 00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:35,159 S4: with us because it's their phone and it's their private information. 463 00:22:35,160 --> 00:22:38,580 S4: But what you can potentially do is ask for a compromise. 464 00:22:38,820 --> 00:22:42,240 S4: You may say something along the lines of it comes 465 00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:45,540 S4: to content that involves your past relationships. Is there an 466 00:22:45,540 --> 00:22:47,400 S4: opportunity or a possibility for you to put that on 467 00:22:47,400 --> 00:22:48,240 S4: a hard drive. 468 00:22:48,270 --> 00:22:48,930 S5: That. 469 00:22:48,930 --> 00:22:53,280 S4: Is existing somewhere in the house that you that that 470 00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:55,949 S4: you don't have on your phone? You may throw in 471 00:22:55,950 --> 00:22:58,889 S4: a compromise. And again, your partner can say no to 472 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:03,030 S4: that because it's their phone and it's their content. But 473 00:23:03,030 --> 00:23:05,850 S4: I think what's really important to remember is if you're 474 00:23:05,850 --> 00:23:08,310 S4: holding on to this after a month, say, this listener 475 00:23:08,340 --> 00:23:10,530 S4: decided not to say anything, and 3 or 4 months 476 00:23:10,530 --> 00:23:12,869 S4: down the track, they're still thinking about it. Of course, 477 00:23:12,869 --> 00:23:14,520 S4: you can still bring it up. It's something that you 478 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,530 S4: did a few months ago. You know, if that's what 479 00:23:16,530 --> 00:23:19,149 S4: you want to do. but it's always leading in with 480 00:23:19,150 --> 00:23:22,900 S4: Self-accountability and then coming up with a plan for repair 481 00:23:22,900 --> 00:23:27,070 S4: and reconnect. And I think that's the most important thing 482 00:23:27,100 --> 00:23:31,000 S4: to be able to do is that self-accountability and repair 483 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:34,690 S4: and and reconnect. And it's completely up to what this 484 00:23:34,690 --> 00:23:37,060 S4: listener wants to do. There's no right or wrong. It's 485 00:23:37,060 --> 00:23:38,350 S4: just what they want to do. 486 00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:42,129 S3: And I think that's that's been the biggest message from today. 487 00:23:42,130 --> 00:23:44,050 S3: And I think that's what I love so much about 488 00:23:44,050 --> 00:23:46,000 S3: your advice is that there's no right or wrong. So 489 00:23:46,030 --> 00:23:49,900 S3: even if this conversation happens and it doesn't go down 490 00:23:49,900 --> 00:23:52,480 S3: the way you know, they want it to, it's then 491 00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:55,360 S3: up to them if they feel comfortable or not staying 492 00:23:55,359 --> 00:23:55,990 S3: in the relationship. 493 00:23:56,020 --> 00:23:56,740 S5: Absolutely. 494 00:23:57,280 --> 00:23:59,230 S4: Absolutely 100%. 495 00:23:59,260 --> 00:24:02,830 S2: Thank you. Megan, you are a queen. We appreciate you 496 00:24:02,830 --> 00:24:05,320 S2: so much and your wisdom wise. 497 00:24:05,350 --> 00:24:06,160 S4: I love our chats. 498 00:24:06,190 --> 00:24:07,389 S5: Thank you so much, ladies. 499 00:24:07,420 --> 00:24:07,990 S2: Bye. 500 00:24:11,020 --> 00:24:12,220 S7: One. Two. Three. Four. 501 00:24:12,820 --> 00:24:18,530 S2: Okay, guys. Hi. Hi. Hi. I, I need to talk 502 00:24:18,530 --> 00:24:21,740 S2: to you about something. I feel like this year there 503 00:24:21,740 --> 00:24:24,889 S2: was there was a point in the podcast where every 504 00:24:24,890 --> 00:24:27,680 S2: week I had a story about my two dogs, Bill 505 00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:31,699 S2: and Ben, pooing in the house. And some people loved it. 506 00:24:31,700 --> 00:24:34,790 S2: Some people did not love it so much. Yeah, it. 507 00:24:34,790 --> 00:24:36,800 S3: Does need a disclaimer this segment. 508 00:24:37,010 --> 00:24:39,560 S2: If you don't like talking about poo, do not listen 509 00:24:39,560 --> 00:24:40,430 S2: to this segment. 510 00:24:40,430 --> 00:24:43,010 S3: And probably I'm gonna say there's probably going to be 511 00:24:43,010 --> 00:24:45,920 S3: a little swear word thrown in there and maybe here 512 00:24:45,920 --> 00:24:46,490 S3: and there. 513 00:24:46,850 --> 00:24:51,320 S2: So what happened in my house a couple of weeks 514 00:24:51,320 --> 00:24:53,629 S2: ago was fucked again. 515 00:24:53,630 --> 00:24:54,439 S3: And F-word two. 516 00:24:54,470 --> 00:24:57,320 S2: There you go. Oh, you said s word. Shit. Okay. 517 00:24:57,350 --> 00:25:00,350 S2: It was actually like. I'm so sorry. I'm okay. 518 00:25:00,350 --> 00:25:01,580 S3: So you can say it was fucked. 519 00:25:01,609 --> 00:25:05,389 S2: I am working from home. I'm so. I'm at home 520 00:25:05,390 --> 00:25:09,320 S2: for this day. And what had happened was the day before, 521 00:25:09,350 --> 00:25:12,649 S2: poor little Benny had had. My dog had had a 522 00:25:12,650 --> 00:25:16,320 S2: very sore tummy. And every time he ate he was vomiting. 523 00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:19,260 S2: So he had vomited in his all good. Now though, 524 00:25:19,500 --> 00:25:22,320 S2: in case anyone's worried like I was. But he's all 525 00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:25,379 S2: good now, and he's vomited in his bed and Bill's bed, 526 00:25:25,380 --> 00:25:27,840 S2: and we have these beds that you can wash. You 527 00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:30,450 S2: can take them apart and wash, and it honestly takes 528 00:25:30,450 --> 00:25:32,580 S2: probably five minutes to put them back to bed together. 529 00:25:32,580 --> 00:25:35,040 S2: But it is the bane of my existence. I it 530 00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:37,380 S2: is my least favourite job. I hate it more than 531 00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:40,350 S2: making our bed. Yeah, and I really don't like putting 532 00:25:40,350 --> 00:25:42,570 S2: sheets on the bed, so it's just very. I feel the. 533 00:25:42,570 --> 00:25:44,040 S3: Same way about couch cushion. 534 00:25:44,040 --> 00:25:46,560 S2: Covers. Yes, it's similar, similar experience. Right. Anyway. But I 535 00:25:46,560 --> 00:25:49,109 S2: was like, look, we'll leave the it's a bit gross, 536 00:25:49,109 --> 00:25:50,430 S2: but I was like, we'll leave the beds for another 537 00:25:50,430 --> 00:25:53,220 S2: night because if he vomits again, I'm not doing that twice. Okay, 538 00:25:53,220 --> 00:25:57,209 S2: so we've got beds, dog beds with vomit. Then we 539 00:25:57,240 --> 00:25:59,790 S2: wake up in the morning and Ben has then vomited 540 00:25:59,790 --> 00:26:02,700 S2: the poor thing all over the rug. Now, because this 541 00:26:02,700 --> 00:26:04,620 S2: is a common occurrence in our household, it hasn't happened 542 00:26:04,619 --> 00:26:06,450 S2: for a while. We have a washable rug. We have 543 00:26:06,480 --> 00:26:08,640 S2: a washable rug that can go in the in a 544 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:12,220 S2: commercial washing machine. So at the laundromat, which has everyone 545 00:26:12,220 --> 00:26:14,320 S2: that's been on my dry saga story. You know, I 546 00:26:14,320 --> 00:26:17,800 S2: spend a lot of time at the laundromat. I'm well 547 00:26:17,830 --> 00:26:22,540 S2: accustomed to that. Anyway, so the house smells like vomit. Okay, 548 00:26:22,540 --> 00:26:24,070 S2: it is what it is. I had to go to 549 00:26:24,100 --> 00:26:26,980 S2: a physio appointment, go to my physio appointment. I come 550 00:26:26,980 --> 00:26:30,970 S2: back and I'm like, I walk into our house and 551 00:26:30,970 --> 00:26:33,940 S2: I was like, oh my God, I can smell vomit, 552 00:26:33,940 --> 00:26:37,300 S2: but I can also smell sewerage. And I was like, 553 00:26:37,300 --> 00:26:41,230 S2: oh my God. And I'm walking. And as I'm getting 554 00:26:41,230 --> 00:26:44,710 S2: closer to our bathroom, I'm like, our bedroom, mind you, 555 00:26:44,710 --> 00:26:46,600 S2: and our ensuite, that doesn't have a door. It's all 556 00:26:46,600 --> 00:26:50,859 S2: open space. Yeah, it's getting worse and worse. And I 557 00:26:50,859 --> 00:26:53,889 S2: was like, what has Dawson done in this house? Like what? 558 00:26:53,920 --> 00:26:56,169 S2: He went straight to blaming Dalton. I'm like, What is 559 00:26:56,170 --> 00:27:00,250 S2: Dalton done? Walk into our bathroom now. Our shower in 560 00:27:00,250 --> 00:27:02,680 S2: our rental is it's a little bit random. It's like 561 00:27:02,680 --> 00:27:04,899 S2: it's almost got a bath built into it. But it's 562 00:27:04,900 --> 00:27:06,550 S2: not one of those bath showers. 563 00:27:06,580 --> 00:27:09,040 S3: It's a square shower with a step down. 564 00:27:09,040 --> 00:27:10,220 S2: Step down? Exactly. 565 00:27:10,250 --> 00:27:13,400 S3: Yeah, but it's not. It's probably like. What would you say? 566 00:27:13,820 --> 00:27:16,910 S3: I don't know how many centimeters, but it's not super, 567 00:27:16,910 --> 00:27:17,390 S3: super deep. 568 00:27:17,420 --> 00:27:19,250 S2: No it's not. It's probably about 30. 569 00:27:19,280 --> 00:27:20,600 S3: Great for washing the dogs. 570 00:27:20,630 --> 00:27:26,480 S2: Yeah, yeah. True, true. Anyway, so I walk into our 571 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,660 S2: bathroom and I was like, what the actual. Sorry to swear, 572 00:27:29,660 --> 00:27:36,020 S2: but fuck. We had sewage in our shower. Sewage pool, 573 00:27:36,050 --> 00:27:38,659 S2: water in our shower. And I was like, oh my God. 574 00:27:38,690 --> 00:27:41,690 S2: So the sewage through the pipes has come up through 575 00:27:41,690 --> 00:27:44,120 S2: all not all of the most of the drains in 576 00:27:44,119 --> 00:27:48,320 S2: our house. And so the, the basins and including our 577 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:55,940 S2: shower had floating poo. I honestly died, I was like, 578 00:27:55,940 --> 00:27:59,270 S2: oh my God, how am I ever going to stand? 579 00:27:59,270 --> 00:28:04,340 S2: It's like absorbing into the walls of the shower. There's floaties. 580 00:28:04,340 --> 00:28:10,560 S2: It is not good. And then I'm like, oh my God, Dalton, 581 00:28:10,770 --> 00:28:13,590 S2: what are we going to do? Because the plumbing is not. Again, 582 00:28:13,590 --> 00:28:16,770 S2: I really like to be empowered except to not plumbing. 583 00:28:16,770 --> 00:28:20,610 S2: It's not my domain. I then walk out and then 584 00:28:20,609 --> 00:28:25,260 S2: I'm like, where's Bill and Ben gone? I walk around 585 00:28:25,619 --> 00:28:29,609 S2: outside and mind you, Ben with a sore tummy, who's 586 00:28:29,609 --> 00:28:32,399 S2: just come back from the vet having an injection to 587 00:28:32,430 --> 00:28:36,119 S2: not vomit anymore, and he's on a strict diet of, uh, 588 00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:40,710 S2: rice and chicken boiled with nothing on it. And, Bill, 589 00:28:40,710 --> 00:28:44,100 S2: they're both. So the drain also is outside. It is 590 00:28:44,100 --> 00:28:47,940 S2: overflowing outside. It's made a big puddle of stuff. Bill 591 00:28:47,940 --> 00:28:51,720 S2: and Ben are there drinking it, and and they then 592 00:28:51,720 --> 00:28:55,980 S2: smell like sewage as well. And our house, I can't 593 00:28:56,010 --> 00:28:58,350 S2: it was vomit. It was sewage. It was. Oh, my God, 594 00:28:58,350 --> 00:29:00,900 S2: I can't even explain to you. And it was quite, 595 00:29:00,900 --> 00:29:04,080 S2: it was quite. It was, it was a lot. So 596 00:29:04,110 --> 00:29:05,760 S2: tell me it was a lot. Because I know you. 597 00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:09,730 S3: Guys got, like an emergency plumber in straight away. But you. 598 00:29:09,730 --> 00:29:11,920 S3: I know this because you've just moved in. You're renting 599 00:29:11,920 --> 00:29:15,220 S3: and your spare bedroom isn't set up. Yes. So you 600 00:29:15,250 --> 00:29:17,800 S3: slept in your. We did. What was that night like? 601 00:29:17,830 --> 00:29:21,070 S2: Oh, yes. So we it went down because the emergency plumber. 602 00:29:21,070 --> 00:29:24,310 S2: But the thing is unfortunately there's some in the all. 603 00:29:24,310 --> 00:29:27,880 S2: It's the same in our old house. The pipes were 604 00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:31,840 S2: made of terracotta so tree roots can get into them. Yes. 605 00:29:31,870 --> 00:29:33,760 S2: Isn't it crazy? They used to make people used to 606 00:29:33,790 --> 00:29:36,670 S2: make pipes out of terracotta. I'm no plumber, but that 607 00:29:36,670 --> 00:29:39,790 S2: seems quite out there. Well, you know, I don't think 608 00:29:39,790 --> 00:29:41,980 S2: they do it anymore. Wasn't, as you know. Yeah. I 609 00:29:41,980 --> 00:29:45,940 S2: don't think they do it anymore anyway. But yes, it was. 610 00:29:45,940 --> 00:29:49,540 S2: I sprayed so much stuff. I scrubbed the shower I 611 00:29:49,570 --> 00:29:52,000 S2: it was, it was, it was, it was a lot. 612 00:29:52,030 --> 00:29:55,240 S2: It was a lot. And it just it just got 613 00:29:55,240 --> 00:29:58,270 S2: me thinking like plumbing is just like hats off to. 614 00:29:58,300 --> 00:30:00,700 S3: All the plumbers out there. Seriously, how they do it? Slay. 615 00:30:00,730 --> 00:30:02,080 S3: I really don't know how they do. 616 00:30:02,080 --> 00:30:04,610 S2: It, but it's also one of the like I've never 617 00:30:04,610 --> 00:30:07,790 S2: had poo in the shower before. So it was. Yeah, I'm. 618 00:30:07,790 --> 00:30:09,080 S3: Sure many people haven't. 619 00:30:09,110 --> 00:30:11,450 S2: But I did what? We washed the dog beds and 620 00:30:11,450 --> 00:30:13,130 S2: we washed the rug, and now we have like a 621 00:30:13,130 --> 00:30:16,490 S2: rug that looks brand new. So that's a positive, very positive. 622 00:30:16,520 --> 00:30:22,370 S2: But it was genuinely a shit show. I love Plumbing 623 00:30:22,370 --> 00:30:23,540 S2: disaster of all time. 624 00:30:23,540 --> 00:30:26,930 S3: No, that is definitely. That is definitely a big plumbing disaster. 625 00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:30,140 S3: It makes me think though, like there's I have no 626 00:30:30,140 --> 00:30:34,040 S3: doubt in my mind that our community will absolutely have 627 00:30:34,040 --> 00:30:36,800 S3: some stories, but I would like to share one. I 628 00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:39,440 S3: think when you told me about this, it made me 629 00:30:39,440 --> 00:30:43,190 S3: think about any plumbing disasters that I've been a part of. 630 00:30:43,190 --> 00:30:46,490 S3: And one time up the farm, which is my husband 631 00:30:46,490 --> 00:30:51,380 S3: Josh's family holiday house, his dad came in and said 632 00:30:51,380 --> 00:30:54,800 S3: to all of us, look, I'm going to be under 633 00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,800 S3: the house with the pipes. No one used the bathroom 634 00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:00,500 S3: for like the next little while we were watching a movie. 635 00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:03,000 S3: So I think I was a bit like just nodding along, 636 00:31:03,000 --> 00:31:06,510 S3: but like, didn't really clock what he'd said. It was 637 00:31:06,510 --> 00:31:07,920 S3: some time afterwards. 638 00:31:08,340 --> 00:31:09,510 S2: But how much. 639 00:31:09,510 --> 00:31:12,150 S3: Time? I don't remember, but it wasn't straight away. 640 00:31:13,170 --> 00:31:13,770 S2: At least it was. 641 00:31:13,770 --> 00:31:15,540 S3: Long enough that he was under the house for a 642 00:31:15,540 --> 00:31:18,420 S3: while and I went to the toilet. 643 00:31:18,450 --> 00:31:20,700 S2: Wait, he's not a plumber either. He's not? No. 644 00:31:20,730 --> 00:31:22,950 S3: So he knows his things. Okay. You know, he's a 645 00:31:22,950 --> 00:31:27,120 S3: handy dude. So he was under there and I went 646 00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:31,230 S3: to the toilet, forgetting he was under the house and, um, 647 00:31:31,260 --> 00:31:32,640 S3: went number twos. 648 00:31:32,670 --> 00:31:33,570 S2: You did a poo. 649 00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:37,830 S3: I did a poo, and the pipes were open, and 650 00:31:37,830 --> 00:31:42,570 S3: he came inside and was like, who did the toilet? 651 00:31:42,660 --> 00:31:46,740 S3: And I wasn't alone. Like there was, I think like Ethan. Josh, like, 652 00:31:46,770 --> 00:31:48,990 S3: there was quite a few of us there. And I 653 00:31:48,990 --> 00:31:52,770 S3: was like, just instantly I realized what I had done. No. Yes, 654 00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:54,330 S3: of course I did. Well, everyone also knew that I 655 00:31:54,330 --> 00:31:55,800 S3: went to the toilet. But did you announce it? No 656 00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:58,470 S3: one decided. Well, I'd left the room and come back. Well, you. 657 00:31:58,470 --> 00:31:59,850 S2: Didn't, you didn't. But no one. 658 00:31:59,850 --> 00:32:02,080 S3: Else had gone to the toilet because they were all 659 00:32:02,110 --> 00:32:02,560 S3: they all. 660 00:32:02,740 --> 00:32:05,170 S2: Remembered. I would have said no. I went to the 661 00:32:05,170 --> 00:32:08,230 S2: bedroom to, um, brush my hair. It felt naughty. 662 00:32:08,830 --> 00:32:14,770 S3: What had happened was basically my shit had flown with 663 00:32:14,770 --> 00:32:21,160 S3: water out of the pipe and apparently just missed his head. 664 00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:27,040 S3: Like just missed his head. And I just, I think back. 665 00:32:27,040 --> 00:32:28,120 S2: Now, and I think it's. 666 00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:29,530 S3: The funniest thing ever. 667 00:32:29,860 --> 00:32:30,220 S2: Because I. 668 00:32:30,220 --> 00:32:31,810 S3: Almost shat on my father in law's. 669 00:32:31,810 --> 00:32:35,290 S2: Head. You nearly pooed in your father in law's mouth. 670 00:32:36,340 --> 00:32:39,220 S2: Why did you have to go there? Is that a fetish? 671 00:32:39,310 --> 00:32:40,120 S2: In some places? 672 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:43,630 S3: Disgusting. But anyway. So. Yeah, it was, um. That's that's 673 00:32:43,630 --> 00:32:44,050 S3: my story. 674 00:32:44,080 --> 00:32:48,280 S2: So your father in law, Ken? Yes, as I call him. Yes. 675 00:32:48,310 --> 00:32:52,450 S2: Came in and said, who pooed then? Did he say who? 676 00:32:52,450 --> 00:32:54,640 S2: Poo went in my. Did he say who's the toilet? 677 00:32:54,640 --> 00:32:56,979 S2: And then you confess or did he say, hey, a 678 00:32:57,010 --> 00:33:00,230 S2: poo just flew Blew into my face. Whose was it? 679 00:33:00,230 --> 00:33:00,680 S2: I think it. 680 00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:04,760 S3: Was more like who? Just use the toilet. And then 681 00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:07,100 S3: I was like, oh, and everyone looked at me because 682 00:33:07,100 --> 00:33:08,570 S3: I was the only one who had left the room. 683 00:33:08,570 --> 00:33:10,550 S2: Why are you so truthful, Laura? 684 00:33:10,580 --> 00:33:13,670 S3: I was the only one who left the room. 685 00:33:13,670 --> 00:33:15,590 S2: I would deny for the rest of my life. 686 00:33:15,620 --> 00:33:18,950 S3: No, no, no, I literally couldn't, I couldn't, I literally 687 00:33:18,950 --> 00:33:21,410 S3: could not. Like, how could you? So if we were 688 00:33:21,410 --> 00:33:24,320 S3: sitting in a room, you, me, Dalton, Josh and your 689 00:33:24,350 --> 00:33:26,990 S3: two sisters sitting in the lounge room, you were the 690 00:33:26,990 --> 00:33:30,290 S3: only one who left the room. Two seconds later, after 691 00:33:30,290 --> 00:33:32,780 S3: you've come back to the room, your mum comes in 692 00:33:32,780 --> 00:33:36,560 S3: and says, who used the bathroom? We would all, of course, 693 00:33:36,590 --> 00:33:38,360 S3: look straight at you because we'd be like, well, we've 694 00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:41,060 S3: been here. How are you going to get out of that? 695 00:33:41,090 --> 00:33:42,470 S2: I've got the best, I've got the best thing. That's 696 00:33:42,470 --> 00:33:44,180 S2: what I do. And also, guys, I'm not a liar. 697 00:33:44,180 --> 00:33:46,520 S2: But I think you might be. I wouldn't want to 698 00:33:46,520 --> 00:33:49,190 S2: admit that I pooed on my father in law's head 699 00:33:49,190 --> 00:33:49,850 S2: like me. 700 00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:52,580 S3: It was me. I was like, oh, fuck. 701 00:33:52,610 --> 00:33:57,510 S2: What a privilege. No. Okay, so what I would say 702 00:33:57,870 --> 00:33:59,760 S2: this is how to get out of this situation. And guys, 703 00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:01,440 S2: I just want to say I don't want to again, 704 00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:03,720 S2: I'm not a liar, but I just would not want 705 00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:07,080 S2: my father in law in this situation. I'm not admitting 706 00:34:07,080 --> 00:34:09,149 S2: it was me, okay? That is, I am a liar 707 00:34:09,150 --> 00:34:10,590 S2: in this situation. Literally. 708 00:34:10,590 --> 00:34:11,310 S3: No way. 709 00:34:11,340 --> 00:34:13,950 S2: Let me tell you. I realized I had to check 710 00:34:13,950 --> 00:34:16,230 S2: my phone. It was in the room or something like that. 711 00:34:16,260 --> 00:34:17,880 S2: Make a reason to go to the room? I needed 712 00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:19,770 S2: to get something from the room. When I walked in there, 713 00:34:19,770 --> 00:34:23,370 S2: I realized that Dalton left a huge pool in the toilet. 714 00:34:23,370 --> 00:34:25,500 S2: Oh my God. And I was so disgusted that I 715 00:34:25,530 --> 00:34:28,890 S2: flushed it. I'm so sorry, Ken. I forgot that you. 716 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:32,549 S3: Of course you would blame Dalton. Of course you would 717 00:34:32,580 --> 00:34:33,630 S3: blame Dalton. 718 00:34:33,900 --> 00:34:37,110 S2: At least my father in law would not think that 719 00:34:37,110 --> 00:34:39,359 S2: my poo nearly hit him. He would think it was 720 00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:43,290 S2: his son's, which is much better for everyone. The end. Linz, 721 00:34:43,290 --> 00:34:44,250 S2: what do you think of that? 722 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:46,560 S1: Oh my God, I'm dying. Am I evil? 723 00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,210 S2: Am I evil or is that what? Can you guys 724 00:34:51,210 --> 00:34:53,460 S2: let me know? Because there is a time where a 725 00:34:53,489 --> 00:34:56,739 S2: little white lie to let to just think that. So 726 00:34:56,739 --> 00:35:00,460 S2: your father in law thinks that his own, uh, child's 727 00:35:00,489 --> 00:35:03,250 S2: poo has been near his face instead of someone he's 728 00:35:03,250 --> 00:35:04,299 S2: not related to. 729 00:35:04,330 --> 00:35:08,290 S3: Can I just say any shit near your face is shit, right? 730 00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:10,960 S2: No, but you want. He would have once cleaned Josh's nappies. 731 00:35:10,989 --> 00:35:14,770 S3: That's very different to an adult human. Poo in some ways. 732 00:35:14,770 --> 00:35:17,859 S3: Probably would prefer my poo than Josh's, I would say. 733 00:35:17,890 --> 00:35:21,910 S3: But it's like it's. It's not that. It's like. Also, 734 00:35:21,940 --> 00:35:23,770 S3: I'm pretty close with my father in law, but he 735 00:35:23,770 --> 00:35:26,170 S3: also was laughing, like it wasn't like a. 736 00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:29,350 S2: Still, did I? I would still deny it. I can't 737 00:35:29,350 --> 00:35:31,150 S2: believe that. What would you do? 738 00:35:31,180 --> 00:35:34,510 S1: I think that I would have to own up to it. 739 00:35:34,540 --> 00:35:35,920 S1: I don't think that I could. I'm not a very 740 00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:37,779 S1: good liar. I don't think I could get away with it. 741 00:35:39,070 --> 00:35:41,800 S2: Me neither. I'd also be laughing the whole time. 742 00:35:41,830 --> 00:35:42,850 S3: I just can't. 743 00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:44,950 S2: I can't. Guys, we're going to put a poll on 744 00:35:44,950 --> 00:35:48,580 S2: the stories. Because this lie is I. Lying is very 745 00:35:48,580 --> 00:35:51,010 S2: bad in terms of, like where it harms the relationship, 746 00:35:51,010 --> 00:35:52,690 S2: where it's. You don't need to validate that. 747 00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:53,020 S3: Honey, do you. 748 00:35:53,020 --> 00:35:54,680 S2: Know what I mean? Like, this is a white lie 749 00:35:54,710 --> 00:35:57,290 S2: that just. I just don't need my father in law. 750 00:35:57,320 --> 00:36:00,379 S3: You would throw Dalton under the bus over so many things, though. 751 00:36:00,380 --> 00:36:04,160 S3: That tells me. Yeah, of course, of course. 752 00:36:04,250 --> 00:36:04,700 S2: Thinks he. 753 00:36:04,700 --> 00:36:05,270 S3: Hasn't done. 754 00:36:05,300 --> 00:36:08,930 S2: You guys tell me, what would you do? Am I 755 00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:12,080 S2: evil or am I just smart? 756 00:36:13,070 --> 00:36:15,770 S3: Look, I wasn't smart in this situation. I literally did 757 00:36:15,770 --> 00:36:16,880 S3: the opposite of what I was told. 758 00:36:17,000 --> 00:36:18,560 S2: That's not the right word. And, you know, all I 759 00:36:18,560 --> 00:36:20,870 S2: can think of right now is talking to myself from 760 00:36:20,900 --> 00:36:22,790 S2: mean Girls. Say, say it to me. Say it to me. 761 00:36:22,790 --> 00:36:27,320 S2: I made you say it yesterday. What? You dirty. Go, go, you. 762 00:36:27,350 --> 00:36:28,790 S8: Dirty little liar! 763 00:36:29,239 --> 00:36:31,400 S3: You didn't say that to me yesterday. What did I say? 764 00:36:31,430 --> 00:36:36,890 S3: You said little bitch. And I was like, what the actual. 765 00:36:36,890 --> 00:36:40,160 UU: Fuck? We've had the longest day ever. And you do 766 00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,530 UU: it to me, you little bitch. 767 00:36:44,000 --> 00:36:45,710 S3: Because you had to get changed. 768 00:36:45,710 --> 00:36:49,250 S2: One more time than I did. Do you know why, guys? 769 00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:51,770 S2: I'm dying because it was the end of the photo shoot. 770 00:36:51,940 --> 00:36:57,850 S2: We had been. We had been. We had been shooting since. Okay. 771 00:36:57,850 --> 00:37:01,750 S2: So we started shooting yesterday at 4:30 a.m. or started 772 00:37:01,750 --> 00:37:04,870 S2: hair and makeup at 4:30 a.m.. This is 6 p.m. 773 00:37:05,020 --> 00:37:08,230 S2: now I don't modelling for me is I've got I 774 00:37:08,260 --> 00:37:11,560 S2: like it's our own collection. It's obviously so exciting. But 775 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:15,339 S2: we had changed 45 times. That's an exaggeration. Probably 15. 776 00:37:15,340 --> 00:37:17,589 S2: But I was like and in my head I knew 777 00:37:17,620 --> 00:37:19,630 S2: we were on our last change. We just had to put. 778 00:37:19,660 --> 00:37:22,120 S2: We were putting the jumper on top for the last 779 00:37:22,270 --> 00:37:25,180 S2: shot and our shorts were going to stay, because changing 780 00:37:25,180 --> 00:37:27,100 S2: your top, fine. It's changing. You take the shoes off, 781 00:37:27,130 --> 00:37:29,170 S2: you put the shoes back on. That's where for me, 782 00:37:29,170 --> 00:37:30,910 S2: I was like in my head I was like, Laura, 783 00:37:30,910 --> 00:37:34,780 S2: well done. You have changed 15,000 times. You are done. 784 00:37:34,810 --> 00:37:36,609 S2: This is the last thing you just put a jumper on. 785 00:37:36,610 --> 00:37:39,940 S2: And then the combo, because the jumper is the blue 786 00:37:39,940 --> 00:37:42,580 S2: and the cream I don't like black and blue together 787 00:37:42,580 --> 00:37:44,200 S2: is not the vibe. So we were like, we need 788 00:37:44,230 --> 00:37:44,799 S2: blue and cream. 789 00:37:44,890 --> 00:37:45,310 S3: Yeah, yeah. 790 00:37:45,340 --> 00:37:47,440 S2: But I was putting the cream jumper on and I 791 00:37:47,440 --> 00:37:50,240 S2: had cream shorts on. Yeah. And there's only one blue jumper, 792 00:37:50,239 --> 00:37:53,299 S2: so Steffi kept her cream shorts on. But it wasn't 793 00:37:53,300 --> 00:37:54,739 S2: your choice. Stop it! What? 794 00:37:54,770 --> 00:37:56,990 S3: Stop it! You're still trying to make me look like 795 00:37:56,989 --> 00:37:59,510 S3: a little bitch. You were in the shots just before 796 00:37:59,510 --> 00:38:02,240 S3: I was in the cream shorts and the blue jumper. 797 00:38:02,239 --> 00:38:04,460 S3: And you were in the blue shorts and the cream 798 00:38:04,460 --> 00:38:07,610 S3: jumper when I went to change. Maddy said, we need 799 00:38:07,610 --> 00:38:10,100 S3: you in the same outfits as the last shot. So 800 00:38:10,100 --> 00:38:11,810 S3: you put the jumper on, and I'm going to put 801 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:13,879 S3: Laura back in the blue shorts. So I went into 802 00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:14,450 S3: the change rooms. 803 00:38:14,750 --> 00:38:15,410 S2: Got changed. 804 00:38:15,830 --> 00:38:18,319 S3: As soon as Maddy passed you those shorts, you looked 805 00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:20,930 S3: at me and you said, you little bitch. Dirty. 806 00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:21,500 S2: I said. 807 00:38:21,530 --> 00:38:23,120 S3: You didn't. You said, you little bitch. 808 00:38:23,210 --> 00:38:25,489 S2: But what I was trying to in my head also 809 00:38:25,489 --> 00:38:27,500 S2: for everyone's like, oh my God, Laura, you little savage. 810 00:38:27,530 --> 00:38:30,799 S2: She was so savage. But when I was also trying, 811 00:38:31,070 --> 00:38:34,070 S2: I was thinking of the mango scene in my head, 812 00:38:34,070 --> 00:38:36,739 S2: and I totally jumbled the words to the point that 813 00:38:36,739 --> 00:38:38,600 S2: it just sounded like I called you a little bitch. 814 00:38:38,630 --> 00:38:41,180 S2: And I really was trying to say you're dirty little 815 00:38:41,210 --> 00:38:44,810 S2: because I was going crazy at this point of the day. Anyway, 816 00:38:44,810 --> 00:38:46,850 S2: it was all over having to change into a pair 817 00:38:46,850 --> 00:38:48,810 S2: of shorts, which I loved. Took me five seconds and 818 00:38:48,810 --> 00:38:51,210 S2: it was fine, but it was so funny because I 819 00:38:51,210 --> 00:38:56,100 S2: was trying to say that line. Anyway. So anyway. 820 00:38:56,130 --> 00:39:00,060 S3: Anyway, moving back to the short stories, please, please let 821 00:39:00,060 --> 00:39:01,860 S3: us know what you would have done. We'll put a 822 00:39:01,860 --> 00:39:04,470 S3: poll in the Facebook group and on our stories of 823 00:39:04,469 --> 00:39:05,910 S3: what you would have done if you would have lied 824 00:39:05,910 --> 00:39:08,370 S3: and said it wasn't your you didn't go to the toilet, 825 00:39:08,370 --> 00:39:09,990 S3: or if you would own up to it. And then 826 00:39:09,989 --> 00:39:14,070 S3: also please send us in your plumbing disaster stories and 827 00:39:14,070 --> 00:39:15,569 S3: we will share them next week. 828 00:39:19,530 --> 00:39:21,930 S9: But is it time for special share? 829 00:39:22,890 --> 00:39:27,300 S3: Share. My special share is actually a go to meditation 830 00:39:27,300 --> 00:39:30,150 S3: of of mine on the Kik app, and it's called 831 00:39:30,150 --> 00:39:33,180 S3: four Part Breath and it's with Jamie. This is also 832 00:39:33,180 --> 00:39:36,360 S3: known as box Breathing. It goes for about five minutes, 833 00:39:36,360 --> 00:39:38,610 S3: but you can do the practice for much longer than that. 834 00:39:38,610 --> 00:39:41,490 S3: But basically through the meditation he teaches you how to 835 00:39:41,520 --> 00:39:43,680 S3: stop and breathe and focus on your breath and get 836 00:39:43,680 --> 00:39:45,930 S3: to four part breath, which is when you breathe in 837 00:39:45,930 --> 00:39:49,250 S3: for four counts, hold for four counts, out for four counts, 838 00:39:49,250 --> 00:39:52,490 S3: hold for four counts. And for me, this breathing meditation 839 00:39:52,489 --> 00:39:56,209 S3: and even just this method is the best thing to 840 00:39:56,210 --> 00:39:59,000 S3: do when I'm really stressed. Or my heart rate's like 841 00:39:59,000 --> 00:40:02,210 S3: through the roof. And the reason why I wanted to 842 00:40:02,210 --> 00:40:03,710 S3: bring it up, because it's one of my favorites and 843 00:40:03,710 --> 00:40:05,960 S3: my go to, obviously. But the reason why I also 844 00:40:05,989 --> 00:40:08,239 S3: wanted to bring it up now, because I've been using 845 00:40:08,239 --> 00:40:11,719 S3: it for ages, is last night, as we've kind of 846 00:40:11,750 --> 00:40:13,759 S3: touched on, we're away, we're in Sydney, we're in a 847 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:16,969 S3: hotel room. I haven't had the best luck with being 848 00:40:16,969 --> 00:40:20,270 S3: interrupted in my sleep while we've been here, and the 849 00:40:20,270 --> 00:40:22,819 S3: other night someone tried to accidentally get into my door. 850 00:40:22,820 --> 00:40:24,320 S3: I think they were just had a really, really like. 851 00:40:24,350 --> 00:40:26,000 S3: It was like the middle of the night, 2 a.m. 852 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,399 S3: and I heard the car beep card beep on my 853 00:40:28,400 --> 00:40:30,110 S3: door and then the door rattle. And that woke me up. 854 00:40:30,110 --> 00:40:31,340 S3: And it kind of rattled me because I was like, 855 00:40:31,370 --> 00:40:33,739 S3: is there someone in my room? So that was the 856 00:40:33,739 --> 00:40:38,359 S3: other night, last night, what happened? Which literally threw my 857 00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:41,750 S3: heart rate through the roof. Do you remember how we 858 00:40:41,780 --> 00:40:44,060 S3: were getting our hair and make up done in my room? Yes, 859 00:40:44,090 --> 00:40:47,029 S3: at 4:30 a.m.. Yes. And I put the Bluetooth speaker on. 860 00:40:47,060 --> 00:40:49,460 S3: Oh my God. And I connected music. Yes, but it 861 00:40:49,460 --> 00:40:54,200 S3: was really soft, right? Yeah. I woke up to. I'm 862 00:40:54,230 --> 00:40:59,570 S3: talking loud. As loud as a party. Music blasting through 863 00:40:59,600 --> 00:41:01,760 S3: my speaker at 2:30 a.m.. 864 00:41:01,790 --> 00:41:02,149 S2: Oh my. 865 00:41:02,150 --> 00:41:04,040 S3: God. And I jumped. 866 00:41:04,070 --> 00:41:04,580 S2: Oh. Of course. 867 00:41:04,610 --> 00:41:06,830 S3: Out of bed. Because it startled me so much. Oh 868 00:41:06,830 --> 00:41:09,830 S3: my God. Like, threw myself at the wall to the 869 00:41:09,830 --> 00:41:12,169 S3: plug because I also couldn't really see much to just 870 00:41:12,170 --> 00:41:15,980 S3: turn it off from the power point. And my heart rate, 871 00:41:15,980 --> 00:41:17,780 S3: because it was. I can't even explain how loud it 872 00:41:17,780 --> 00:41:21,560 S3: was so loud. Like obviously someone was up late listening 873 00:41:21,590 --> 00:41:23,930 S3: to music and it had like disconnected from their speaker 874 00:41:23,930 --> 00:41:26,210 S3: and had like connected to mine or someone else's music. 875 00:41:26,239 --> 00:41:28,069 S2: I thought your phone had music. 876 00:41:28,100 --> 00:41:28,819 S3: No. 877 00:41:28,850 --> 00:41:29,810 S2: My God, that is. 878 00:41:29,840 --> 00:41:32,030 S3: It was music I'd never heard before. And it was. 879 00:41:32,030 --> 00:41:34,549 S3: It was. I honestly was listening for it to two 880 00:41:34,550 --> 00:41:36,980 S3: seconds before I turned it off. So like. But I also, 881 00:41:37,010 --> 00:41:38,630 S3: I think I was also startled because I was like, 882 00:41:38,630 --> 00:41:40,279 S3: if I work in everyone else up around me, like 883 00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:41,600 S3: I wanted to ask you because you're in the room 884 00:41:41,600 --> 00:41:44,280 S3: next to me if you heard anything? But then I 885 00:41:44,310 --> 00:41:46,170 S3: lay back in bed and my heart rate. 886 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:46,439 S2: Oh. 887 00:41:46,980 --> 00:41:50,100 S3: Because it was just like shock. And so loud was, 888 00:41:50,130 --> 00:41:51,029 S3: oh my God, it. 889 00:41:51,030 --> 00:41:52,560 S2: Literally would have jumped out of bed. Like I would. 890 00:41:52,560 --> 00:41:54,840 S3: Have felt like I was running, like I was like. 891 00:41:55,230 --> 00:41:57,480 S3: So then I was literally doing four part breath in 892 00:41:57,480 --> 00:42:01,020 S3: the bed until I fell asleep. So yeah, bit of 893 00:42:01,020 --> 00:42:03,810 S3: a story there for you, but also great meditation. 894 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:07,050 S2: Love, I love that. Um, and I'm sorry, that is 895 00:42:07,050 --> 00:42:09,930 S2: really shocking. Took a while to go back. Very unlucky. 896 00:42:09,930 --> 00:42:12,210 S2: That is very unlikely and very unlucky. 897 00:42:12,239 --> 00:42:14,550 S3: Yeah, I feel like Bluetooth speakers in hotels shouldn't be 898 00:42:14,550 --> 00:42:16,320 S3: a thing if you can connect to someone else's room. 899 00:42:16,530 --> 00:42:17,910 S3: What the heck? Yeah, dumb. 900 00:42:17,910 --> 00:42:20,910 S2: Anyway, very small radius only. What's yours? Okay. Love that 901 00:42:20,910 --> 00:42:22,980 S2: for you. No, I love, I love, I love that 902 00:42:22,980 --> 00:42:25,020 S2: breath meditation so much. So I don't love that for you. 903 00:42:25,020 --> 00:42:27,300 S2: That's really startling and horrible. And I'm really sorry you 904 00:42:27,300 --> 00:42:30,060 S2: went through that. Mine's a book. It's called All Fours 905 00:42:30,090 --> 00:42:33,900 S2: by Miranda July. I have just absolutely loved reading it. 906 00:42:33,989 --> 00:42:36,660 S2: It is gorgeous. It's just such a nice read. Anyone 907 00:42:36,660 --> 00:42:38,730 S2: that's read it, a few people have because they people 908 00:42:38,730 --> 00:42:40,680 S2: reply to me on my stories when I shared it, 909 00:42:41,350 --> 00:42:45,190 S2: I can never feel I don't know how I feel 910 00:42:45,190 --> 00:42:48,580 S2: about inserting a tampon anymore. And if you if you know, 911 00:42:48,580 --> 00:42:49,540 S2: you know. Okay. 912 00:42:49,780 --> 00:42:50,560 S3: Oh, God. 913 00:42:50,590 --> 00:42:53,380 S2: It's. I just it's that. The only thing is, I 914 00:42:53,380 --> 00:42:55,060 S2: don't know how I'm going to feel. Okay. 915 00:42:55,900 --> 00:42:58,270 S3: Interesting. Because your period's coming up, so we'll see how 916 00:42:58,270 --> 00:42:58,600 S3: you go. 917 00:42:58,630 --> 00:43:01,240 S2: I know, um, but aside from that, it's a really, 918 00:43:01,239 --> 00:43:04,870 S2: really beautiful read about a woman and her journey and 919 00:43:04,900 --> 00:43:09,489 S2: kind of rediscovering herself. So I highly recommend reading that. Amazing. 920 00:43:09,520 --> 00:43:12,640 S3: Thanks, laws. Okay, well, that's it from us today, guys. 921 00:43:12,640 --> 00:43:15,910 S3: Wednesday's episode is with one of our favorite people, Harry. 922 00:43:15,940 --> 00:43:18,580 S2: Harry Garside, after the Olympics. Yeah. 923 00:43:18,610 --> 00:43:21,070 S3: So look forward to that one. We can't wait to 924 00:43:21,100 --> 00:43:22,420 S3: share that one with you guys. And if you want 925 00:43:22,450 --> 00:43:25,299 S3: to get involved in our Kick Pod Facebook group, we 926 00:43:25,300 --> 00:43:29,200 S3: would absolutely love to have you. And on socials and everything. 927 00:43:29,200 --> 00:43:30,969 S3: And as we said at the top of the podcast, please, 928 00:43:30,969 --> 00:43:33,250 S3: please give us a good rating. If you've enjoyed today's podcast, 929 00:43:33,280 --> 00:43:34,960 S3: we love you guys and we'll chat to you soon. 930 00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:36,010 S2: Love you. Bye!