S1: Listen up production.
S2: Activate your internet because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts
S2: in three two. Sorry, it's still buffering.
S3: One join him. And boy, man. Hamish, you boil.
S4: Man.
S3: Boy. Lemon. Oh, boy.
S4: Piping hot.
S2: Sir.
S4: Phrase on the nose.
S3: Avoid my water tender. Jacko. Oh, it's nice and cool. Boy,
S3: you know, it's a steam engine that we're doing.
S4: You're off your you haven't you think you've worked the
S4: rails a.
S2: Day in your life? Drew, I haven't. I've got to
S2: believe that there are seconds.
S3: Yeah. Steam engine, famed Hamish. You were on onto it.
S3: Boiler man. Jack. Are you sick of being woken by
S3: your water tender? Not as highly ranked as a boiler man,
S3: but still Im in the hot room hoping to make
S3: sure that that water gets to a boiling and steaming temperature. What?
S3: It's cool. So saying that we have a problem.
S2: He sounded a bit relaxed. I mean.
S4: You've watched Thomas the Tank Engine. You would know the.
S2: Core.
S4: Principle of steam engines is you never relax. A mechanical issue.
S2: That's the whole problem with any.
S4: Anything in the Thomas the Tank engine world. It's like,
S4: you know, oh, no.
S2: There's not enough coal. I could say all.
S4: The ingredients for steam engines are very fiercely debated about.
S3: You can't be that relaxed, Jack. Anyway, ahoy! Two to Lucy,
S3: who uploaded.
S4: Signal Control.
S2: To Lucy.
S3: Who uploaded her audio very easily, I would suggest.
S4: Was on this.
S3: Is DeKalb.
S1: Illinois, number six. I hope you doing well in this lockdown.
S1: I hope you are keeping that Tesla within your five
S1: kilometer radius. Just wanted to have it plugged in here
S1: and let you know that I think I have blown
S1: something wide open here. Sorry. Last week I was cooking
S1: a slow cooked, pulled pork dish and the recipe called
S1: for some Halloween hours. So I purchased these older house. Hello, painters.
S1: And I noticed the chili smell. One, two, three. We've
S1: got three chilies making this a hot food. And it
S1: got me thinking and I did a little bit of
S1: research online. And my theory is that the older processor
S1: heat scale expands across its whole product range. It is
S1: not just on the taco seasonings, it's across the whole range.
S1: So you talk seasonings only go up to a medium,
S1: mild medium, but you have a painter's and you salsas
S1: go up to a hot. So this is my theory
S1: for you. Think of wine at water. I think hopefully
S1: you can sleep better at night. I certainly have been. So, yeah.
S1: That's all for me. See you later.
S4: Wonderful insight really conjures up the vision of tossing and turning, going.
S2: By a lot of that. Why is that?
S4: A business go a selling point. It blows the conspiracy table,
S4: not a close. The questions I suppose, we have for
S4: old El Paso Diva and a company that's been bought
S4: for a non sponsor.
S3: The company has come up with lot.
S4: Amazing amount of airtime this year and keep it going
S4: if I can for a second. Okay.
S3: The Texas quickly, does that satisfy Jack, maybe what you're
S3: encountering with that chili heat system that you did? I
S3: think she's absolutely right. There is. And and thank you
S3: for everyone sending it to me on Instagram as well.
S3: There are three chili versions of the sauce. There is
S3: just more of the mix. Old El Paso Australia's Instagram
S3: sent me a photo of a white unlabeled packet and said,
S3: This is coming to you soon with free chilis dancing.
S2: Oh, but that was months ago.
S3: Now and that never came. So I'm worried that they
S3: thought that that maybe came to me and it never did.
S4: Maybe they heard about your mission chip sponsorship.
S2: I better realize that you play.
S4: Both sides of the Mexican.
S2: Border, Jake. Take it. You've got the.
S3: What I would say the prominent is a lady if
S3: the prominent brand wanting to satisfy you with a bespoke
S3: seasoning kind of way. But I just thought, was.
S4: This something they were working on? And I just think
S4: it'll be make you happy. I think I don't think
S4: just I don't think the cheese does go across the
S4: whole brand because obviously don't put them on tortillas. They
S4: they all the tortillas. And so it's not like everything
S4: they make has three chilies on it. You're color and
S4: depending on the hotness. Can I just say I forgot
S4: to mention this to you guys a couple of days ago.
S4: I got the pockets. Oh, I got the pockets. We
S4: talked about months ago on the podcast.
S3: With I a.
S4: Lot of the no mass campaign. Surely now you idiots,
S4: you must be out to get it all in the pocket. Yeah,
S4: it was the theory because obviously bread doesn't talk have the, the,
S4: the ice and the can fall out of. Yeah. People
S4: don't like that so this is the no mess pocket.
S2: Was a good.
S4: You know, we you know, we're not paid to out
S4: here and this one person.
S3: Because my worry is, is that you can't then layer
S3: it properly either if you have stuffing a pocket. How
S3: can you lie? Like he's. No, they're making a fall
S3: to the bottom or.
S4: Well, yeah, you got to be good. And you obviously
S4: know it's just a jam, even like an ice cream. Yeah,
S4: that wouldn't be the way to make a burrito. I
S4: used it for breakfast burritos. I was making a brekkie
S4: burrito for me and my son. A lot of hype
S4: about the pockets that we get in the pockets. We
S4: got the pockets, open it up. The thing is, the
S4: pocket is obviously a 3D. You want to create the
S4: three day shape. That's they flat.
S3: Packed. Yeah.
S4: And unfortunately, the very first pocket I picked up along
S4: the same along the resting of the fly back and
S4: picked up it had a crack.
S2: At a crack, a tear in the pocket. And my
S2: heart broke off. How's this for all you've done?
S4: Yeah. You now need pockets with reinforced folds on them
S4: because the it was failing along the side of the pocket.
S3: And did you find one that didn't?
S4: None of the others did. Just one out of.
S3: Let's say.
S4: 11.
S2: Of.
S4: Them were fine. Big. But you're right. I mean, you
S4: got to I'm spooning in the bacon and eggs like
S4: scrambled egg mixture I had and some AVO and you
S4: kind of like you're building it you have to build
S4: them hovering.
S3: Yeah, that's hard.
S4: So you, you hovering it in your hand, squashing some
S4: AVO and then spooning lucky with bacon and eggs.
S3: Or putting something in a letterbox.
S4: It was. Yeah, it was. It was like, I'm trying
S4: to but but if you had a letterbox for it
S4: was very important that you junk.
S2: Mail went in the middle.
S4: And bills them local announcements then a magnet from a
S4: real estate agent.
S2: Anything on the the.
S3: Home we wanted to kick off the show with a
S3: look a bit of housekeeping.
S4: Yes we do this from time to time.
S3: We are a show that does peter out on a
S3: few ideas.
S4: We risk Peter out.
S3: We risk paper out. But we wanted to make it
S3: clear that some things are not petering out. Yeah, but
S3: COVID and the pandemic has thrown off the throwing them
S3: for a loop.
S4: I mean, Clive is really the source of a lot
S4: of Peter at the concert hall. We'll do Peter out
S4: for a moment there.
S3: There are a bunch of special skills that people been
S3: asking for that we've said yes, we'll get you on for.
S4: Yeah.
S3: And two that come to mind, the nine letter word
S3: girl that can get the matrix.
S4: Oh yeah.
S3: Yeah. Out of the paper. The matrix of the letters.
S3: And can he get the nine letter word every single time.
S3: We haven't been out of fly. Anyone in to be
S3: able to do that we need to do it in person.
S4: We do. We need someone. Do you actually need to
S4: walk past it? Because at my mom's house that you
S4: are regarded as, yeah, there's no faster way to win
S4: my mom's approval than to walk past the nine letter
S4: word in the age of the Sydney Morning Herald, the.
S3: Matrix of.
S4: Letters and go, Oh, serendipity, whatever. And Mum will be
S4: loved forever. I mean she loves.
S3: The other one was be a tasting fellow. He said
S3: he can name any B aircraft B like if he
S3: just buy taste again, we can't fly people in so
S3: that they're all there. They're sitting there and we understand
S3: that when situation changes for Australia, boy will we have
S3: just a hot run of special skills being tested in
S3: the flesh.
S4: Yeah. What about fake plants again?
S3: We'd love him to come in. He can spot whether
S3: a plant is real or fake from across the road.
S4: I really want to say that.
S3: Because we can do it in the flesh. We it's
S3: tough for us to hold them up on a zoom
S3: and then go. That's if they.
S4: Are in the flesh. And a big one that's been
S4: coming through in terms of, hey, what's going on with this?
S4: Which I haven't really addressed on air, but I've got
S4: back to a lot of people online only fans. You're
S4: only a fans of camp I've I had did let
S4: that Peter out I stopped the payment I made it
S4: free haven't dipped back in there I obviously stopped you
S4: know the content production. Yeah.
S3: Because it was poor.
S4: Well it just was hard to get hot shots of you. Yeah. Then,
S4: you know, then a few months later you got the
S4: dog and I had a lot of people going mad.
S4: He's just. He's doing selfies with the dog in his undies.
S4: It's like, you know, as if that was the that
S4: was really the final nail in the coffin.
S3: For finally fans where well.
S4: If I'm trying to put this hot shit up and
S4: maybe you're doing soft porn shots with the dog, not
S4: not just, you know, sexy shots like it and gaze on.
S2: I felt sorry for you.
S4: Were doing my firefighter calendar stuff.
S2: Anyway, you.
S4: You were doing some dog underpants stuff. And then people
S4: were like, well, the only fans is it's that, you know,
S4: that easy peter out it's still active people go going
S4: to I.
S3: Don't bother going high.
S4: And the official 24 seven.
S3: The slide potty Oh.
S4: That's on.
S3: That is very much on but obviously borders are closed
S3: we can't get everyone from around the country to get
S3: on the American emergency slide. We think this is possibly
S3: a good thing because it gives everybody extra months to
S3: strengthen your ankles.
S4: We want to say a lot of holidays, ankle weights
S4: being used to strengthen them up because whilst two or
S4: three will snap on the day, we'd love to keep
S4: it single digits.
S3: If it doesn't happen, this year will happen next year.
S3: Maybe even kick off the year with the slide party,
S3: emergency slide party on the 22. We'll get to go
S3: on the emergency slide in a plane.
S4: One that I get a little bit of pepper cannons.
S4: They are on the way. The pepper cannons are coming.
S3: Because these are a high powered application of pepper on
S3: a meal.
S4: They seem to deliver an industrial quantity of.
S3: Pepper at a pace and a power.
S4: That you didn't even know you need.
S3: But make you joyous.
S4: Yeah, we're going to do wasn't it wasn't the add
S4: we're going to believe a lot of kids can't believe
S4: how happy that is.
S2: Yeah. Yeah.
S3: So we're going to try it and save our partners
S3: can sense a change in our.
S4: Can't put their finger on it, but we seem to
S4: be walking around just on top of the world.
S3: Mm hmm. And how many of.
S4: You are going to couple? We had a we. I
S4: hired a guy from a and website or a like
S4: an antosca type thing called member Upwork Teo, Thailand. Writing comedy.
S4: Writing for us.
S2: Yeah, yeah.
S4: He shows me absolute fortunes. I let that peter out
S4: myself because I got to excite at the time. And
S4: I think I put up, like, $100 a script to write.
S4: Casual conversation between three friends. Yes. And then I realized
S4: it was a us.
S3: Yeah.
S4: And I was like, okay, no wonder he's emailing me
S4: all the time. I had that guy. Do you want
S4: some more? Like Teo? Couldn't believe it. I think I
S4: still got a script floating around. I got an old
S4: one floating around that that we didn't use at the time.
S4: Mm hmm. Have to dig around for it, but I'll.
S4: I'll have it waiting in the wings for us in
S4: the next couple of.
S3: Weeks if we ever feel we're running dry in content, like.
S4: Guys, you know, love doing the podcast, but just against
S4: a creative wall today. Here we go. Thankfully, Tango's got
S4: some casual conversation scripted for us. We don't even have
S4: to think about it. This was this was a big one.
S4: And you claim something in episode 122. Oh, Jack and
S4: I mistakenly heard something in a story about you playing
S4: Nothing Else Matters at school. At your U12 school by Metallica.
S3: Oh, yes.
S4: And and I and then we thought you were playing
S4: it on trumpet. But you were playing it on guitar.
S4: You're accompanying someone? That's right. Singing.
S3: I was singing and playing it. I was singing and
S3: playing in addition guitar because I left it in the
S3: sun while a more proficient lead guitarist was doing the
S3: lead during it.
S4: And it was his performance.
S3: Well, now was kind of both of our performance, but
S3: I ruined it.
S4: I didn't know you were singing it.
S2: How old were you? 18. Just.
S3: Yeah, I was eight. Six, eight, eight in six months. Yeah.
S4: The growling. Oh, yeah, I'll.
S3: Think of that. I can't remember the name of Metallica's
S3: lead singer, but he wouldn't know. No, that's the job. Hetfield.
S3: James Hetfield. James Hetfield. But yeah, I sounded nothing like.
S4: No, I mean, you know, even. Even even at that age.
S4: Think the girl.
S3: Ever. Have I ever. Have I ever sat of the line?
S4: Yeah. Maybe thousands, thousands of dollars to get your voice
S4: up to that level. But you said this is the
S4: grab when we mistakenly thought it was you playing. Nothing
S4: else matters. But I think you said this.
S3: You 12 concert got up to play. Nothing else matters.
S3: Five Delicate.
S4: What do you make of my guitar? Right. Sorry, I
S4: just immediately thought.
S2: Trumps you all. And I would have given it to, say.
S4: 17 year old Andy honking.
S2: Yeah. Nothing else matters on the horn. I will. I
S2: think they'll the end of the for the end of
S2: the year played out the. Oh yeah.
S3: Okay that isn't a Peter out band.
S4: I want you to play the vocal line.
S3: The vocal line? Yeah, I'll play those notes. Like a
S3: lot of nothing else matters of the trumpet.
S4: At the moment. But of course all your stuff's in Melbourne,
S4: but if you got the travel.
S2: Trump We have to bring up the travel trumpet. How
S2: did you bring that for you? Living by yourself? Because
S2: I'm bored. I've got one.
S4: A treat for the neighbours. Oh.
S2: Great. Got a guy playing the Macarena again. Oh, well, this.
S3: Week nothing else matters. It starts preparation.
S2: Oh, boy.
S4: Have you two, have you hung out yet.
S2: Haven't they put a pillow.
S4: In it or something.
S2: Like.
S4: Full volume Kong.
S2: Yeah.
S4: I mean, I guess you got to do something.
S3: Yeah, exactly. I mean, people do they blow their I'll
S3: never know. Like they got leaf blowers and power drills
S3: and all that stuff. This is nice.
S4: That you wake up at 7:00 in the morning, go
S4: outside and blow the.
S2: Driveway. Just on all fours.
S3: Time we said we'd check back in with this. Of course.
S3: Our digital horses. Yeah. People who don't know they've built
S3: a new or metaverse or what they.
S4: Call it, then they're going to metaverse. And essentially you
S4: own a digital horse.
S3: Yeah, we.
S4: Bought them in digital.
S3: Money like bitcoin, yet.
S4: Unique. That is your unique horse. We've, of course, got
S4: Thunder Castle. His view?
S3: Yep. And you raised them in the hope to earn
S3: money from the races, but also be out to sell
S3: the horses. Anyway, let's jump into it now.
S2: We love it.
S4: It's great. I mean, I love that because, you know,
S4: it effectively shows that you take the old yeah, you
S4: turn it into one zero.
S3: It's a joy to you.
S1: Duffy Digital joy. How are you going?
S4: Digital ADC now very keen, very excited to see. Whilst
S4: the a lot of the normal world has been locked down,
S4: the digital horse racing world has not been affected. The
S4: digital nags continue to.
S2: Run a.
S4: Race a minute.
S3: Let's start with our main mare. See no show. Sure
S3: she's a me or not. She is our main mare. Thunder,
S3: the castle she'd been breeding for us. But she's back racing.
S3: How has she been going?
S1: She's. She's not really been competitive in her class. So
S1: there's there's been a few big changes over the past
S1: three weeks. So I'm just putting her on ice for
S1: the now, keeping her in the breed bond right.
S3: With her when.
S4: When.
S3: When and when.
S4: You say she's not being competitive, is she winning too.
S2: Easily? Is that the worry? Is that.
S3: The worry?
S1: She's she's competing on a second and third basis. But
S1: that's not what we're here for. We're here for the win.
S1: So I, I just want to look after her race
S1: record at the moment and manage that so that she
S1: keeps her value moving into the longevity of the game.
S3: More like a boxer. Yeah, at the moment, towards the
S3: end of their career, it's like, Oh, we're not fighting anyone. Good. Yeah.
S3: Let's just make sure we pick out some extent stuff. Yeah, yeah. What?
S4: How many races has she actually won?
S1: She's only won the one race at the moment, but
S1: she's still got that 50% place. Right. So she's still,
S1: she's still our y positive. Um, but again we want
S1: those wins. That's where, that's where you can make a
S1: lot of money if you were to then sell her
S1: off or do anything else in the future with her.
S3: Yeah. Okay. Well let's put us on the castle side
S3: now and let's just talk about our dipshits.
S4: Dipshits and shepherds. Which are these all offspring of Sun Castle?
S1: Yes, all offspring.
S4: Yep. So we've got a bunch of them. Who've we got.
S4: Who else is in the stable now. They're, they're obviously
S4: of a lower class Simpsons guy.
S3: Jack Post is known by Jack to put Tony and
S3: Earl Squirrels and all.
S4: Of these whose of these four.
S2: Horses.
S4: That are the kids of of Thunder Castle who now
S4: that you know they kind of like a rowdy I
S4: think of them as like a rowdy bunch of teens. Yeah.
S4: Who's showing promise? Yeah.
S3: Who is doing the best.
S1: Let me ask you a question. Let me let me
S1: flip that. Who do you think, based off the show
S1: where these names that come from should be doing the
S1: best from those names for Tony? Yeah. Yeah. See, this
S1: is like, who do you think that should be doing
S1: the worst?
S3: Well, probably with all due respect to Jack Price, they
S3: think it's The Simpsons guy that should be doing the worst. Yeah,
S3: but Jack Price would be a close second.
S1: I love it because Simpsons Guy's number one Jack Post
S1: is looking pretty promising. At number two, it's completely smooth.
S2: And these guys Jack feels immense pride. So what has
S2: Jack post one?
S1: One we have we haven't had the breakthrough because there's
S1: been a lot of updates that have been happening, so
S1: we haven't been able to run them in the ground
S1: is as Hamish wanted right now, there's now been fatigue
S1: entered into it as well.
S3: So the.
S4: The.
S1: Changes that have been really sort of.
S4: That's interesting. Yeah. When we first pulled the horse like
S4: we were just laughing because it's sort of like, you know,
S4: fun the castle which she could have a baby and
S4: literally be running an hour later and possibly win a race.
S4: But now there's like so you can't say how long
S4: you have to wait. Now, after running a race.
S1: Where you've got a 24 hour period that you can
S1: essentially resets the fatigue and each horse actually gets affected
S1: by fatigue and all these other things different. And also
S1: another layer to that is how your horse runs under
S1: different fatigue levels also comes into play as well. So
S1: there's a lot more training to go into it. But
S1: what it means is that these horses are maybe sitting
S1: on the fringe that aren't bad, they're not great, but
S1: they have the winning ability. It means that they're going
S1: to have a lot more chance, if they're managed correctly,
S1: to win more races.
S4: So because they might be running against a good horse
S4: that's tired.
S1: That's right. That's exactly right.
S3: Christian, thank you very much.
S4: We will do that for Jack. He's going to have
S4: heavy fatigue. Oh.
S2: Yeah. I mean.
S3: I was surprised he rocked up to hear the races.
S3: But thank you, buddy. We'll check back in a few
S3: weeks time and say, are you still looking to to
S3: breed a couple more? I still buy a couple more shepherds.
S1: So what I'm going to do is now our offspring
S1: are actually starting to come of age that we can
S1: actually start to grade them as well. So. Exactly.
S2: Jack's activity. Yeah.
S1: So we're going to start to sort of go down
S1: the generations and that's where it gets really exciting. So
S1: what I'm going to start to do with the stables
S1: is actually manage that as well in that we're starting
S1: to get a good income stream coming from putting the
S1: horses into stud and I'll even look to breed The
S1: Simpsons guy and to put Tony to. The little bit
S1: of inbreeding on the platform. So the census guy is
S1: a good one. So we'll put him into the stud
S1: bond and we should have a lot of people sort
S1: of lining up to take a break with him.
S3: If you've seen Jack pose in the changerooms after a
S3: swim of people hiding out.
S2: The.
S4: Same jack.
S2: In the sky and it's wonderful. Thanks. Christians makes a
S2: major light.
S4: And you've been a resident of Sydney now for over
S4: a month.
S3: Yeah, well.
S4: Over up doing the 100 from Sydney and then captured by.
S3: Her boarders.
S4: Much like in Galaga.
S2: Yeah.
S4: You thought you would just hit two sheets and aliens
S4: and we wafted out the.
S2: Blue rays.
S4: And caught you. Now you and me, a double shoot.
S2: Yeah. Yeah. Well, bubble buddies, bubble bodies, double shifts. Do
S2: you believe him?
S4: And I suppose the things that bring out of us. Well,
S4: they're not be is because we're firing these into us.
S3: Ways, long ways to plenty of it.
S4: Some more than others. We might try and put that behind.
S4: Not the point of this. Appreciate you having me over
S4: to the house. Sometimes I've bubble buddy and that's the
S4: reasons to your toilet for having.
S2: To.
S4: Be subjected to.
S3: Your average flows flow.
S4: Yeah, but then also the death star.
S2: Of floats of.
S4: Just shards and porcelain flying around the bathroom. And it
S4: is a rental, so you'll be up for an absolute
S4: huge bond. That's why I always bring that.
S3: Carbon fibre.
S2: Toilet.
S4: I always bring my pay shield. It's the right thing
S4: to do when you're visiting someone's house. If you have
S4: an escape.
S3: Hijacker twist on this. Yeah. So it's a singles buddy
S3: about bubble, right? Yeah. And people going. People were texting me,
S3: damning me, going, you're not single, you know, let it a.
S4: Couple of weeks ago.
S3: It's not it's not the point, you know. It's not
S3: the point. Anyone living by themselves in Sydney is it.
S3: But not doing like a I can pronounce you Chuck
S3: and Larry thing with Hayman.
S2: You know.
S4: When I went over and he's like, just come in
S4: through the bedroom.
S2: Like, I'll try and what.
S4: Interesting insight after all these years to see the other
S4: side of how the flies must feel in the spider's.
S2: Web.
S4: Yeah, it's come straight through the bedroom. Oh.
S2: I was.
S4: Told we were having dinner.
S2: First.
S4: And perhaps I'll be treated to a meal.
S2: If I perform well.
S3: There is an easier to open door of a patio.
S2: Doors can be tricky. Yes, yes, it's right here.
S4: And he does this.
S3: Through a spare bedroom that I'll not use it.
S2: In my friends behind my head going.
S4: So crazy we never really get.
S2: A chance to talk at work.
S4: Thanks so much for coming. Think there's a curfew, you know,
S4: led to go home? Oh, I didn't hear about the curfew. Oh, hey. Anyway,
S4: we're up and we're in Sydney that I moved to Sydney,
S4: you know, with my family in January. I've been here
S4: a little longer than you do in the lay of
S4: the land, but you're doing great.
S2: Thanks, I think. Well, thanks.
S3: Thanks.
S4: He's I'm glad you hear that, because I want to
S4: reference something that I'm glad you've been here. I want
S4: to reference something that you might have seen or you
S4: might not have seen. But it's been on my mind
S4: for and I just sort of gave this one. I
S4: was like, I've got to bring it out. With A&E,
S4: there is an ad on the side of a bus.
S4: It's actually on the back of a bus and there
S4: are a lot of buses going around Sydney and I
S4: think it's Sydney's worst and I think it's probably the
S4: worst out of everything.
S2: Okay, it's not a full.
S4: It's for a great cause, one that be very close
S4: to your heart. One, it's for saving water.
S3: Okay?
S4: Yes, it's for, you know, I'm a thriftiness. Yep. And
S4: you know, we all agree no one's pro water wastage
S4: help the farmers. Bush fires climate change. We love it.
S4: They the the what they've gone for.
S2: Though it's it's a it's a.
S4: Cut down issue. How is.
S2: That? Okay.
S4: Jack, I'll see if we can I can accurately paint
S4: the picture. Yes, I know. We're in an audio medium.
S4: The guy.
S3: It's actually a.
S4: Chubby, redheaded, bearded guy, which is the law in all ads.
S2: You must have a chubby.
S4: Judy guy with a beard and a red head. Ideally
S4: the same guy.
S2: Like.
S4: That's. So it's just your standard ad guy with a
S4: shower cap on and and and then like, yeah, he's
S4: in the shower.
S3: Okay.
S4: And then the shower cap.
S3: I have gone for common by over common man with
S3: like a portly fellow. Yeah, but.
S4: I.
S2: Know a guy from the 15th had a bit of
S2: a matronly.
S4: Lady ways to protect her.
S2: Curly hair. Yeah, so, you know, to get.
S4: To the salon again. So anyway, he's got the shower
S4: cap on, but again, it's like that's the theme of
S4: the ad. It's a bit cut. It's a bit like pantomiming. Like,
S4: you know, I'm surprised he doesn't have a rubber duck
S4: in a scrubbing brush. You know, you really sell that.
S4: He's in the.
S3: Shower and he I imagine he's kind of waist up
S3: in this show. Does he?
S4: Yep. Kind of wipes out, maybe even, like, ribs up. Yeah.
S3: That's why they included the shower. Okay. That's right. He
S3: would have been sitting there in.
S4: The has gone. Just looks like he's doing it. Which
S4: pervert you put your shower cap on you know he's
S4: we know he freaks out.
S2: Yeah we do when we think about it. We do
S2: know we can't see it but we.
S3: Know we know that it's out for a reason. We
S3: mean it's.
S2: It's it's a medical review and.
S4: He's just out doing what we all do it. Yeah.
S4: And now he's got a shower cap on so he's innocent. Anyway,
S4: this stain blowing up around him. Right. And the slogan
S4: that they've come up with is Don't turn your shower
S4: into a sauna bulb. Right? So they kind of like
S4: this is the character that he's playing.
S2: But that's not what you say.
S4: That's the first error. That's temperature based. Yeah.
S2: Okay.
S3: Exactly. That's that's that's.
S4: That's actually an ad for don't have too.
S3: Hawkish, you know. Yeah.
S4: Yeah. Which has nothing to do.
S2: With water and. Exactly, exactly. So you're actually wrong. Like
S2: the whole.
S4: Point of this is flawed from the get go. If
S4: it was, don't turn your shower into a bath. Right.
S4: Like don't have a big don't flood the house. Yeah. Okay.
S4: So already you're like.
S2: Wrong, wrong.
S4: You've completely deceased. In fact, if anything, this there's less
S4: water going down the drain when it stain because.
S2: It will be actually.
S4: Capturing more of the water in the house and it
S4: will condense and you could use a lighter so already
S4: wrong them then and this is the bit we just
S4: go this goes from an average ad to like okay
S4: these are the worst that there's a fireman coming in
S4: through the bathroom window behind him like like scowling at him.
S3: Like.
S2: Like. Oh, we thought there.
S4: Was a fire in here.
S2: Not yeah, yes, yeah. Steve lightbulbs there.
S4: They steam and open bathroom window fireman climbing and then like.
S3: Oh.
S4: It's just you having a.
S2: Long shower. Did you ever go to jail so you don't.
S4: Understand the concept of temperature versus volume?
S2: Yeah.
S4: You're insulting the fire department.
S2: That would deploy would. They would deploy to a steamy bathroom.
S4: Thinking it's a house fire. These guys are trained professionals.
S2: Trained training, a whole lot of trust.
S3: They can't discern.
S2: Smoke from steam, no water vapor, the smoke and the
S2: public over there, they just coming and going.
S4: Might not you again it. How long was this one?
S4: 6 minutes.
S2: Meanwhile, there's like a factory fire somewhere like that is.
S4: That's a.
S2: Shock. That's the with that. It's the worst that.
S4: And an amazing special skill fell to my side of
S4: the email fence. And a man called Harrison has a skill.
S4: This is one of our favorite categories of skill is
S4: just something that you you encounter a lot but you
S4: never think about, ah, well, what if I was a
S4: superhuman in this field? Yeah, it's. I suppose it's like
S4: it's a nuisance that you deal with in daily life,
S4: talking about mandarins and their pips. The things I face
S4: a lot of Mandarin pip issues in my life have kids.
S4: My kids really love a Mandy. Yeah. And they like
S4: and you love being able to.
S2: Keep it to kid things because you.
S4: Enjoy peeling it yourself. Yeah, it's kind of like it's manageable.
S4: You're not allowed to have sugar, but it's sort of
S4: like it's kind of a hit, like eating vitamin sales or.
S3: And it's a trainer.
S4: You're like, That's not really sugar beet. It is better than.
S2: Bitter, I suppose.
S3: And it's like a beginning level of orange because it's
S3: easier to peel. Yeah, it's like practice amazing. You eventually
S3: upgrade to an art at some point.
S4: Currently the kids favorite thing at the moment and I
S4: has to steal the mandarins, go and hide in our
S4: wardrobe and to sit under the like under those dresses
S4: of just eight mandarins. And there, you know, it's like dancing.
S2: Yes.
S3: That's that's a day.
S4: She's at.
S2: 40.
S4: That's pretty much the holidays. Just split up into bits
S4: that cheer.
S2: Up 43 year old let's 40 minutes is going all
S2: over the world revenue mandarins.
S4: And that's a very fun game at the moment though
S4: not loving it because she finds a lot of Mandarin pips.
S2: And see clients however.
S4: I have right and he went he skills about mandarins
S4: he can tell from the outside of the Mandarin he's
S4: gone I can tell many people are in there now
S4: we that blew our minds because we were like, I
S4: didn't realise this was a skill I'd love to have.
S4: The skill have to be taught this because quite often
S4: if you're hiding in the cupboard with your children eating mandarins,
S4: you think having a fun time, but then finding a
S4: pip can really derail the move? Yeah, especially if you're
S4: a four.
S2: Year old.
S4: Daughter of mine. Yeah. So that really, I'm like, what
S4: a wonderful ability if someone can. Because to the layperson
S4: like you or I, it it's a.
S3: Can play lottery. Oh yeah. I don't have to be none.
S4: I've be I'm after.
S3: One to throw Mandarin just in fear of getting.
S4: What I'm up to. A lot expecting them every topic exactly.
S4: Could be one Pippin in there could be one at
S4: one per segment. Sometimes I've had.
S2: Two or three per.
S4: Segment in the whole. Mandy Yeah. And I guess she
S4: never occurred to me to go right. What species of
S4: Mandarin was that? Because I've since learnt, because I have
S4: shopped for this segment, there are different.
S2: Ha.
S4: Different species, different types of Mandarin. Yeah. What I should
S4: be doing is keeping notes and just going you band
S4: if you're a high Pym species, you band anyway, that's
S4: Harrison's skill. He joins us now over Zoom. We've got
S4: to do this remotely, HARRISON How am I to unite boys?
S3: And I hope you've been taking off the dogs. Andy
S3: No need.
S4: So, Kate, just hopefully you just kept Mandy's in our
S4: mouth for this segment and much healthier addiction. Harrison, how
S4: long have you had this skill for?
S3: Well, all previously worked at a greengrocer before. And as
S3: you know, ham, there are perks of working in retail.
S3: So instead of having, you know, the magnum ice creams
S3: behind the counter on video.
S4: Thank you.
S3: Mandarins. But in saying that there is a lot of
S3: different brands and different types of mandarins, so it is
S3: it is quite hard and I challenge everyone out there
S3: to give it a go, I say.
S4: But I think just from a nutritional or a health
S4: star rating better much safer to eat three mandarins a
S4: shift than three Magnum Argos.
S2: Yes we've.
S4: Cardiovascular health pants popping we.
S3: May have seen a thinner Blake.
S2: Doing his.
S3: Lifetime.
S4: Driven up your pants because.
S2: You eat too many mandarins probably.
S4: Not because of course you know, like throw out a
S4: couple of Mandarin brands that.
S3: As Harrison throws you eat.
S4: Yeah. What do you got?
S3: You know you got you got your Ben Diego you
S3: got the light, you got your tango. You know which
S3: ones the most lost touch. If you if you saw
S3: someone having a look, it would probably have to be expensive. Odd.
S3: The pocket mandarins can walk in a department.
S4: Must be very nice cruiser you know, cruising down the
S4: street with two iPhones to it.
S2: To pocket.
S3: So our plan was to give him one wasn't it.
S2: Well I've actually got, we got.
S4: Yeah we've got three, I've selected three and I believe
S4: Harrison in your email you said as long as he
S4: could see the outside of the Mandarin, then you could
S4: guess this is your skill in a nutshell, or in
S4: a mandarin pale you can see the Mandarin and immediately say,
S4: How many pips are in it? Now, is this.
S3: A foolproof skill? Yes, it is. I think in many considerations,
S3: such as looking at the food veto, which is the
S3: outside layer of the mandarin skin. Yeah. The size. Yeah, yeah. Okay.
S4: You ask that. Wow. Okay. So do you know how
S4: many segments are in each mandarin.
S3: And which mandarin do you.
S4: Have? Well, he's okay and I've got three spaces in
S4: front of me. Should I pick the space?
S3: Yeah.
S4: The type of Mandarin. And because I kind of feel
S4: like that would be even more impressive for Harrison if
S4: he doesn't get a say in it. Yeah, and then
S4: we'll show it to you via Zoom. Harrison, did we
S4: have to tell you the type of Mandarin.
S3: It would help just purely because we're on Zoom. If
S3: you tell me what type of name, I'm happy to
S3: do that because this already seems hard enough. Okay.
S4: Okay, well, we've got the McCarten, the writing material, and
S4: the Dawkins the fan, so I don't have one of those.
S4: You went to find my normal game, which is by
S4: a nice common man, red imperial and a merkel.
S3: Okay, okay.
S4: All right. Okay. And before you say anything, let's. Let's
S4: play the opener.
S2: Back. Seriousness is killing me and me.
UU: I must confess. I want to see. I want to
UU: see what's.
S2: In this many. So clear your mind, Harry.
UU: This time. Baby one more time for the first time.
S4: Yes, because we haven't seen you do it before. So
S4: for you, it's one more time. For us, it's the
S4: first time. Why don't we go? Ready, Imperial?
S3: Okay. All right.
S4: Andy is now showing Harrison the Red Imperial. He's rotating
S4: it slowly, almost like it's on a plinth at a
S4: car show.
S3: It's got a prominent nipple at the top. Would you
S3: say it's one of those called prominent nipple? We can
S3: go with.
S2: A raised.
S4: Area.
S2: Yeah.
S3: Let's leave it there.
S2: The other one is Mercantile, right?
S3: And then the dimple is shallow. Yes. So I would
S3: say it's about five mil from the top side and
S3: the dimple is a shallow three mil. Okay.
S4: What do you think in there? As you say, this
S4: writing pretty good experience with the red Imperials.
S2: The green.
S3: Grass that I worked that didn't sell red Imperials or.
S4: Doing a switch back to the moon. I'm happy.
S2: To caught.
S3: On all. I'll take the chance. So with the Red
S3: Imperials do have different tastes in every brand. As I said,
S3: by looking at the four veto, the orange, you outside
S3: types of it.
S2: Mm hmm.
S3: Yep. I'm going to lock in a low number and
S3: go toe to toe.
S2: The.
S4: And he's bringing it to me now. And this is
S4: where we say we're only doing one Mandarin here.
S3: Because we can keep on peeling mandarins. It's not interesting enough. Podcast.
S4: You've got to understand, there's over a million podcasts available worldwide.
S2: And for us, TV.
S4: Feeling Mandarin is a decent use of people's time that
S4: they've chosen to give us their attention. I just think
S4: that would be the height of arrogance. One. One. Or
S4: do I can't make it right in the first segment? Nope.
S3: Nope.
S4: I'm X-raying the second segment up to light. No, Pip.
S4: There was a tiny little bit of.
S3: How many segments here and there I am. Uh.
S4: Oh, my God, there's only six.
S3: Okay, so to that.
S4: Right, four red imperial, only six segments.
S3: Oh, I believe so.
S4: Is that. No, pip.
S3: No, pip.
S4: Honestly, this seven seven.
S3: No, no.
S4: It isn't a red in pieces.
S2: Number five.
S3: I was checking because there's a thick segment double checking.
S4: Spot on anything. So I'm doing.
S3: Pip. No, pip.
S4: Three to go. Three you need to get from three segments.
S4: No pip. Oh you need everything here on the mini segment.
S2: Oh, oh no pip. You know Pip it's a900 so voice.
S2: I mean. Yeah, I mean, I.
S4: Guess you have been stitched up. It's Mother Nature's played
S4: an elaborate prank on you both.
S3: I mean, are there manufacturers that can make seedless or.
S4: I don't know. Don't know. But but I tell you what,
S4: I'll be reaching for a rating period. Now, I've never
S4: thought about which species has the least beeps.
S3: Do you want to see them go again?
S2: Maybe. I want to see you try the Merkel bear.
S4: I mean, we we say that it's not interesting.
S2: But maybe it is.
S3: Jacques thought. Well, you just you spend a minute saying
S3: that you wouldn't be so arrogant to ever do multiple
S3: mandarins in the same time.
S4: You might calm down. Yeah.
S3: We're going to go. I can get an and call it.
S3: I'm guessing the pips were on.
S4: I mean, Jack, you're on the other side. You can't
S4: see it as well as we can. Is it engaging
S4: from an audio.
S2: Book because it requires a.
S3: Lot of imagination and credibility?
S2: Right.
S4: You've seen the Mandarin.
S2: Before and you've.
S4: Seen the segments.
S3: This is just we make it okay. This is the Merkel.
S3: It was.
S4: What are you trying to imagine so hard? What was
S4: the that was the biggest struggle for your imagination?
S2: Describing a mandarin.
S3: I'll tell you, the the part I struggle with most
S3: was the X-ray bit like you looking through one of
S3: the segments. I've never had an experience with that, so I.
S4: Never held Mandarin up to the light to see if
S4: there's pips in it.
S3: No, I just eat it and feel the pips with
S3: my mouth. Wow. Okay. He's the Merc caught Harrison. It's
S3: very round there. It seems like a dimple on both sides,
S3: even at the STEM side. So it's quite flat.
S4: Much more classic, flat, shiny, waxy mandarin.
S3: At risk of losing Jack. What are you going to
S3: look in? Oh, I think I'm going to walk in high.
S3: If it's a low state in court, it will be
S3: single digits around six. But I'm going to take the
S3: risk and and lock in 20.
S2: 4000 get on that. It's just all the way along
S2: with that. Even the silver.
S3: We have it wrong though. We had zero for the
S3: first one. So I'm going to go on. You have
S3: to get it exactly right over a coin.
S4: Well, in the first Jack, did you see all you
S4: can watch me now you have to use your imagination.
S4: Can you imagine a 39 year old man hollering up
S4: a segment of Mandarin.
S2: To the light? Okay.
S4: Let us know if you rams me.
S3: I'm with you now.
S2: It's way too powerful. The graphics card can't render this
S2: image of a man holding ups. And I got to
S2: tell you before.
S3: Do they do the number as we get to two again?
S4: Hang on. Three, three in the second one half time.
S2: Oh, shit. One of those.
S4: Ones you find in the.
S3: Three eight. Three. Wow. 11.
S2: This leads.
S4: To more.
S3: Than 13.
S2: We're halfway through over 13. He's on travel on this
S2: jack to make sure it's fun to watch.
S4: Ot 116.
S3: 316. Three. Nine, ten, 19. How many.
S2: Segments left? Three to go. Zero. Oh, look at all three.
S3: So, 22. That's what you wanted, wasn't it? Was the
S3: 23 to 24 with 24.
S2: To. Jack, even if you've got any brain power, you
S2: believe all that I got? Believe what I'm imagining. That
S2: is unbelievable. Is unreal. Harrison, you're just stuff you want
S2: mucking around, boy. Yes.
S3: You know, and you know, you mandarins, it's. You get
S3: yourself a coin and a coin.
S4: And I coin, which.
S3: Is one coin with.
S4: 108 coin on the back. We humorously.
S2: Have equated.
S4: It to a coin. Of course, we believe it's worth
S4: a bitcoin bet to receive a proper bitcoin for it.
S4: You would have to, as we always say, sell it
S4: on a secondary market and find an appropriate buyer, which
S4: is not us.
S3: Very difficult to do.
S2: Good luck.
S4: That's in your hands. Now, the coin, the physical coin
S4: is coming to you. Gadget, you seem that's a unique
S4: coin number.
S3: Well, that might finding these boys. I've got a direct
S3: message from a Haden on my Instagram. He obviously was
S3: worried about the security of high stakes and the emails
S3: coming in. It's nothing to do with you, but it
S3: has to do with another member of our group.
S4: Also, he wanted to guarantee. Got to you.
S3: Well, he just wanted to guarantee he didn't get to Jack.
S4: Gotcha. I also I direct message from a girl called
S4: Victoria who said the same thing, not explicitly. She just
S4: said hey and gave me a Snapchat account, but I
S4: think she wants to talk to me privately about it
S4: is show issue. You better find she gets off the bait.
S3: Jack. How are things going? Yeah.
S4: I'm voting, Jack.
S3: I'm good. You enjoying during the time here?
S2: This feels like.
S3: A big trapdoor being planted under my feet. But, yes,
S3: I'm enjoying my time here.
S4: And don't mind us as we.
S2: Install the trapdoor.
S4: And make sure.
S3: You.
S4: Make sure the pond of piranhas is.
S2: Well stocked under the trap door.
S3: In a moment, Diego, just get you to go and
S3: stand on that cross.
S2: Might just come.
S4: And get you to have a nibble of this pie
S4: in a giant mouse.
S2: Trap.
S4: Sorry. My apologies. It was all.
S3: Right. It's. It's a hobby for you.
S4: Well documented hobby.
S2: Yes. Yes. Okay. Well, you know.
S4: You're I mean, obviously.
S3: I have I mean, I've been I've gone on record
S3: and said this shows a hobby before. But I think
S3: where I last left, it was apologize for calling the
S3: show a hobby and said it wasn't a hobby. But
S3: what I liked about it and obviously it was it
S3: was kind of hurtful. We're all working out about stuff
S3: and you're calling it a hobby. But then the other
S3: part to it, the other side was like, but he
S3: must love it because you.
S4: To feel like a hobby.
S3: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
S4: And it's an enjoyable.
S3: Way to.
S4: Spend your time.
S3: Exactly. You choose hobbies for enjoyment. Jack chose this. That's great. Yeah. Jack,
S3: you sometimes go on other people's podcast.
S2: Mm hmm. Mm hmm.
S4: That would be a drag, wouldn't it?
S3: Yeah. I mean, but maybe just podcasting in general is
S3: a hobby of mine, so I don't mind going. You do.
S3: You're in the.
S4: Mediums. Don't have the mediums here.
S3: So obviously this is my number one podcast to come on,
S3: but I haven't been on others. You were on Dill
S3: and Friends podcast? Yeah. Recently. Mm hmm. And this is
S3: what came up. You go into something else, you have
S3: to leave. The first thing, you you're actually have to
S3: face the reality of what that would be. And it's
S3: tough to leave. And that's why I haven't left. I've
S3: still work on The Hangman Andy podcast. Even though we're
S3: not doing daily radio, I'm still tied down by it.
S2: So I don't know. I'm so sorry that we got
S2: you to this desk, everyone, but.
S4: We drag you into the basement, tie you up with.
S2: Electrical cords.
S4: Make you press the buttons than you would phone.
S2: Books to go lie down and still.
S3: Tied down by this. Yes.
S4: It's like I mean, Jack, in terms of contact, I
S4: was we've got to it's got to be pretty low
S4: on the scale.
S3: That was I'll be honest, that was a very long podcast.
S3: He talks to you for a long time. So it
S3: gives you a lot of rope to just keep talking
S3: and talking and you got to put a foot wrong
S3: and say something that you obviously don't mean.
S2: No, that's not a police investigation you've got to try
S2: to get. That was the bit after.
S4: That just going just tell just tell us tell us
S4: how little fun you're having on the podcast and we'll
S4: let you have some. Well.
S2: You can get something. See.
S3: I don't feel tied down for the let the record show.
S3: I feel free to go wherever I want and do
S3: what I please.
S4: Sometimes you don't come to the meetings.
S2: It's completely free. Thanks for listening to Hamish and Andy.
S2: Podcast will return next week, catch up or contribute. But
S2: Hamish and Andy don't call.
S1: Listen to.