S1: A listener production.
S2: Activate your internet because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts
S2: in three two. Sorry. Still buffering. One.
S3: Ahoy! Two. May. Ishaku. Hamish. Okay.
S4: Tough one for Japanese.
S3: Yeah.
S4: You're in the ballpark. There's a there is a lot
S4: of words and things in Japanese culture.
S5: I feel like we've been to Japan a few times.
S5: Were we samurais once and sumo wrestlers another time when we.
S4: Type of swords one time.
S3: Yep. Not today.
S4: Okay.
S3: This is something to give you a clue. This is
S3: something very dear to the show, you would say. It's
S3: got a very strong link to the show. Uh, Ahoy! Tamai! Kirei! Jack!
S5: Ahoy!
S3: And I am the seeker.
S4: Which I hope means superior care. Which is one rank
S4: above Jack's.
S3: So it's something in Japanese culture that we also do
S3: in the Hamish and Andy podcast culture. And we do it,
S3: you and I do.
S4: Oh, is it going, is it going? Is it types
S4: of bowels.
S5: The types of bowel.
S4: And there are different types.
S3: There are different types of bowel for the types of greeting.
S5: That's a great one.
S3: So the the Ishaku 15 degrees here is that bowel
S3: that's here. Even I can get past that.
S4: That's on a normal day. I'm not even getting going
S4: on that.
S3: That's a casual greeting.
S4: Yep.
S3: Just that one. Um, the kiri 30 degrees jack.
S5: Yep. We're getting somewhere.
S3: A little more formal. Used in greeting a superior at work.
S4: Or with mine. One at 15 degrees. You wouldn't even
S4: be looking at the floor yet. You wouldn't even be
S4: able to see the ground.
S3: No, but don't you just nodded your head. Then don't
S3: make that mistake. Still, it's from the pelvis. It still
S3: is a twist. 15 degrees.
S4: I didn't know I was on show. Yeah, I wasn't
S4: that wasn't a performance secret.
S3: 45 degrees. The most formal bow.
S4: They don't go lower than that.
S3: They don't go. So we're guaranteed below 90 on our show.
S4: I'm at 110. I reckon 110 degrees from vertical.
S3: Yep. So they. They're not going anything. They're all acute.
S3: They're angles.
S4: Remember I told you about the court bow that I
S4: learned about, which is just the head? Yes. So at
S4: government House, there's a government house. And when you meet
S4: the governor general, you are told to do a court bow,
S4: which I think people there was a few military people
S4: there and they were like, yep, no worries. We know
S4: what that is. I was like, guys, help us out.
S4: What is that? And it is just a bow of
S4: the head.
S3: Just nod, nod, but bear the heads a nod.
S4: Yeah, it's a it's a meaningful nod.
S3: I also do Connor Donaldson from I think he's New Zealand,
S3: but living in Bristol in the UK. He went to
S3: come to tell us what he's been up to.
S6: Tough break. Ahoy from Bristol, UK. Connor. Here. Have the
S6: day off today. Thanks to you guys. While I was
S6: working yesterday, I was listening to the podcast. I was
S6: sliding a large piece of plywood off of a pallet
S6: at about chest height. At the same time you guys
S6: were talking about the lady sniffing poo. I started laughing,
S6: I let go of the board and the edge fell
S6: onto my foot right behind the steel cap. Obviously it's
S6: currently bruised and swollen, but luckily not broken. By the
S6: time this reaches you, I'm sure it'll be healed. Cheers
S6: for the day, fellas.
S4: Well, I mean, I think that was in the Pre-conclave episode,
S4: wasn't it? We were talking about, um, Jack just 86
S4: ING one of those, uh, just not letting that person
S4: through to the conclave. Yeah. Which was a good which
S4: was a good move.
S3: Not the chosen one or the chosen number twos, as
S3: it would be.
S4: Would have been. So that's remarkable speed to be able
S4: to upload that episode to now that.
S5: Lightning.
S4: Quick.
S3: It's great. We've sorted out the website. They're coming in
S3: thick and fast.com home. We've got a special guest in
S3: the studio. Hasn't been for some time. Big orgs. How
S3: are you?
S5: Orgs?
S3: Hello, boys. I know you used to do the whistle
S3: when you came in.
S4: Yeah, still got it in. You.
S5: Know. Can you unlearn a whistle? Oh.
S4: It's like watching Jordan try and dunk. I can't do
S4: it anymore. I'm getting too old for this.
S5: Whoosh!
S3: There you go. There it is. Jordan's like, come back, guys.
S3: I can do it.
S4: I just have to warm up.
S3: The reason why you're in is because a little while
S3: ago on the show, we had a guy called Christian
S3: who rang, who wrote in with $1 million idea, and
S3: he promised to tell us as long as we didn't
S3: steal it from him or tell the public we broke
S3: that promise.
S4: We that was a I still do feel a bit
S4: bad about that. Hawk. Did you hear that episode at all? Hawgs? No. Fine.
S4: If you didn't. I almost think we start with this. Yeah.
S4: Jack and I heard the idea. Then we told Andy
S4: and Andy's like, ah, no worries in stealing that. His
S4: million dollar idea was essentially hairdresser at the airport. Right.
S4: And you can get a haircut while you wait for
S4: your plane. It was called haircuts. And you just, you know,
S4: it's a time saver that there's a barber at the airport.
S4: And he'd done some maths and he was like, look,
S4: three hairdressers think he had him working round the clock
S4: 365 days a year. But the numbers looked good based
S4: on that maths. He was like everyone, everyone wants haircuts.
S4: A lot of people wrote in and said, hey, two,
S4: two camps. Really? They either said, I've seen this or um,
S4: or I did this. There were a few people saying, yeah,
S4: we tried to do this, and it didn't take.
S3: Which you'd had before, and a number of your inventions.
S3: That's why I've got you in here. By the way,
S3: if people are new to the podcast, welcome by all means.
S3: But Haug's very famous on our show for having a
S3: lot of inventions over the ride. Some of them have
S3: been have gone on to be amazing and we laughed
S3: at them at the time, which was the what was
S3: the one that you think was the biggest?
S5: It was need a.
S4: Betterhelp.com.
S5: That I you.
S3: Which is just our airtasker now.
S4: It's Airtasker. You did invent Airtasker.
S3: Yeah. You also invented where the bet at one point
S3: where you could bet on the weather that now occurs.
S3: You can actually do that. The gym train we thought
S3: was a good one, where you could go to the
S3: gym on the train during your commute. That one hasn't
S3: been invented yet, but I.
S4: Think you invented seated cycling at a desk.
S3: Yeah. Yes. That was to power your lamp. The desk lamp, though,
S3: I think.
S5: The work workout we called that.
S4: That's right. Yeah. I mean, there's so many of these ideas,
S4: you know, you were an absolute ideas machine back then.
S4: You probably still are.
S5: But the skin colored phone was one of my favorites.
S3: Oh, that's right. So you could be on the phone.
S3: This is before hands free. You could be on the
S3: phone in your car and police wouldn't know.
S4: Of all the ways to break that law, getting a
S4: phone that matched your flesh tone is one of the
S4: more interesting. Not even a cord. Not even a hands
S4: free cord that blends in. But just so you can
S4: really have a hand distracted.
S3: We just think you have an eye for a great idea.
S3: So Hamish just told you Christian's idea about the ear cuts.
S3: So a hairdresser at the airport. As far as million
S3: dollar ideas go, what would you rank that between 1
S3: and 10?
S5: Well, if you want to call it a million, you
S5: need to earn millions, right? Like, you've you've just got
S5: one person cutting you. Like, how have you got a
S5: whole team there?
S3: Yeah, I think that's the idea. You could potentially franchise, but.
S5: I don't love it because you're not going like I
S5: need my guy. Yeah, you you everyone needs your guy.
S5: Unless you're. Unless you travel that much? Yeah. Maybe once
S5: every six weeks. Doubtful. I don't know. I don't love it.
S3: So what are you giving it out of ten?
S4: Why should we rate it between 0 and 1 million?
S5: Yeah, that's a good idea.
S4: Where does it land? Between 0 and 1 million.
S5: I think about 450,000.
S3: Let's do 4.5l.
S5: No, I like this.
S4: I like this.
S3: It's going to be confused. So what we're going to do.
S4: Is 450,000 out of a.
S5: Million.
S3: So what we're going to do, Hawgs is since then,
S3: people have written in going, that idea was terrible. I've
S3: got the million dollar idea now. Hamish and I discussed it.
S3: We're not going to invest anyone's ideas. That's for Shark Tank.
S3: We don't want to be on the show. You're welcome to.
S3: If you wanted to write.
S4: God, this would be an amazing full circle, because our
S4: old segment was you listing your ideas and then people
S4: ringing up saying if they wanted to invest so that
S4: if we've if we can marry you as an investor
S4: now with some of these ideas, by all means go
S4: for it. But what we thought we'd do as a
S4: service is go. We're not we're probably not going to invest.
S4: I mean, we can barely get our act together to
S4: make a tall hat. So we're not we're trying to
S4: break the record for world's tallest hat. Just because I
S4: know you're listening to the show. Yeah. Cool. Um, so
S4: we're not going to do that. But what we can
S4: do is at least give them some critical feedback from
S4: our favorite inventor and possible investor.
S3: Just quickly, when you say, we're not going to do that,
S3: we are doing the tall hat. We're not going. We
S3: are going to invest. We're not going to invest. Sorry.
S3: So let's start with Heath. Heath Haug's is here. He's
S3: going to give you a rating. What's your million dollar idea?
S7: Hey, guys. Uh, my idea is roll on Vegemite. So essentially,
S7: just a, like, a roll on deodorant, but Vegemite. Uh.
S4: Hawkes has just looked at me and mouthed, I had
S4: that idea.
S5: I think, did he do roll on butter? I think.
S3: He did roll.
S5: On butter.
S3: Yeah. Yeah. You did roll on butter for the show
S3: back in the day.
S5: Yeah.
S3: Do you think a change to Vegemite increases the the
S3: idea or is better idea or.
S5: Well. Oh, honey. I think it's even worse. Oh.
S3: Honey. He's happy to go to honey. What are you.
S3: What are you giving that? What are you giving it
S3: a ten.
S5: Oh. The problem with the million dollar. See the problem?
S5: It's Vegemite, so you're gonna have to sell it to Vegemite. Yes.
S4: Yeah.
S5: Is that your million dollar idea to sell it to them?
S7: Yeah, definitely. Yep.
S8: What are you thinking?
S5: Oh, I think like a €150,000.
S4: For using my scale. And he's trying to get the
S4: 1 to 10 scale going. I'm sticking to the 1
S4: to 1 million. Um, okay. That is the tough thing
S4: because Vegemite.
S5: Sounds better for.
S4: Vegemite will own it. And also, if you go in
S4: and pitch it, even if you've got the tech, they
S4: can just go, yeah, we were thinking of that.
S3: Yeah. Yeah.
S4: See you later.
S3: Uh, Heath, what do you feel about that? It's $150,000 idea.
S4: Still good.
S3: Money. Still good money.
S7: Selling it a bit short there, I reckon.
S3: Okay, well, good luck and let us know how you go.
S3: All right. We go from Heath to Jack. Hey, Jack.
S7: Hey, boys. How are.
S3: You? Yeah. Good. Do you have $1 million idea for Horgs?
S3: We haven't got to the million yet.
S7: Oh, I do. So the problem is, you know, when
S7: you are eating dinner, it might be a wrap or
S7: a burrito or a soft taco, and you put it
S7: down on your plate and it all just unravels.
S8: Yeah.
S7: Mhm. Edible. Sticky tape.
S3: Sticky tape.
S5: Right?
S7: Yeah. It'll solve all the problems. You can wrap it around,
S7: have a different flavors.
S4: Is it. Is it tasty or like. Can you tell
S4: it's in your mouth?
S7: No. Well, you will have a flavorless one, I reckon.
S7: And then maybe, you know, for burritos, you could have
S7: a salsa flavored one.
S3: What's it made of?
S7: Um, I was thinking maybe rice paper or something like that. Or,
S7: you know, those Listerine strips, whatever they use for that.
S4: Yeah, they do get pretty sticky.
S3: Okay, so you haven't.
S4: Checked out.
S3: The technology yourself.
S4: This is this is one of those things where if
S4: the technology worked, you'd go all day long. The tricky
S4: part would be taping something to a burrito and having
S4: it stick the way we're hoping for it to stick.
S4: That could be the tough bit of the science.
S5: Then you're going to get sticky hands. My, the concern
S5: is that every nearly a third of the inventions that
S5: I pitched to you guys back in the day, your
S5: feedback was to me. You can't. That's not an invention.
S5: You've you haven't come up with the technology. Yes.
S3: So that's what you're giving him?
S5: Yeah.
S3: Yeah. Jack I mean.
S4: It's good tech if. But that's the leap to make
S4: it sort of like going boots that can walk on
S4: the roof and you go, oh, okay, great. But how?
S3: Yeah.
S4: Well, you just you use science to stick to the roof.
S3: Let's say it can work. I still don't see when
S3: I have my burrito wanting to spend the time, tape
S3: it up to tape it up.
S5: No, but.
S3: Maybe then it becomes.
S5: Part of the burrito.
S4: Like, I worry.
S5: Taped to something.
S4: I worry that we're going to get to a stage
S4: where a small. It's like wrapping a birthday present, a
S4: small piece of tape that you might use to wrap
S4: a birthday present won't be enough to hold the pressure
S4: of the burrito, and you will have to do a
S4: full lap of tape around the burrito. And I worry
S4: in that instance, is that going to be too much
S4: tape to eat? And it kind of gets stuck in
S4: your mouth. It doesn't dissolve the way we wanted.
S7: Just one one full wrap around, I reckon. One lap.
S4: The really tough part about this is you're going up
S4: against the geniuses at Old El Paso now. Every invention
S4: they come up with is to keep a burrito together.
S4: We've talked about it before on the show. They've got
S4: the bucket burrito, the boat burrito, the pockets, the pockets.
S4: Everything's made to reduce spillage. It's their number one enemy.
S3: What about instead of a tape, a corn chip hook?
S3: That so, so so when you wrap and then like.
S4: A fish hook.
S3: Yeah. Like a fish hook. That that that that then
S3: clips onto the other side and you have two holes
S3: on the other side of your wrap.
S4: Almost. So are you thinking like when you use a bandage,
S4: like in your first aid kit, that hook mechanism that
S4: keeps the bandage tight.
S3: Yeah.
S4: That's not bad. One of those.
S5: Was.
S4: Made of corn chip and rice paper made of a
S4: completely edible technology and very, very sharp when it hits
S4: the taco. But your mouth can't feel it.
S3: No. Exactly. Um, what do you think for Jack Hawkes?
S5: Oh, I don't like this at all.
S3: Yeah.
S5: I think it's a one.
S3: A $1.
S4: $1.
S5: 100.
S3: 100. Okay, back to my scale. Sorry, Jack. We've got
S3: time for one more. Luke. Ahoy to you, Luke. Um,
S3: do you think you've got a better idea than edible
S3: sticky tape?
S7: Yes.
S3: Great. 100%.
S4: Okay. Thanks for joining us. Um, no. Far away. Far away.
S4: What have we got?
S7: Right.
S9: It's, um. You guys have. You guys have had cans
S9: of drink? So a cheeky beer before? Yes I presume.
S4: Yeah, I yeah, I've had one, one of those.
S9: So. And you've been to the pub, I presume. You
S9: know old mates. You've been there.
S8: Yeah.
S3: We've pub and other pubs.
S9: Yes. So when you order, say a pot that comes
S9: with a handle, how nostalgic is that feeling? But you
S9: can't have it at home with a can, can you?
S8: No. No.
S9: Until now, we have created the can cradle, which is
S9: an aluminium strip that clips onto the side of your
S9: can with ease, and creates that feeling of being at
S9: the pub holding a handle at home.
S5: I love it.
S4: So it's a handle for a for a tinnie?
S5: Yeah.
S3: Do you prefer, would you prefer to use a handle
S3: while you ever can?
S5: Um, yes. Maybe.
S3: Well, I mean, I don't think I never holding a
S3: can going. I wish I do like, I.
S4: Do like a handle of beer, but I think I
S4: like the glass element. Yeah. Drinking it like that too.
S5: I don't think I remember how I had an invention. Well, we.
S3: Tried to bring this up for you. The slab of pots. Yeah.
S3: And so, Hawks, I think this is it might not
S3: be better than Luke's, but. But the idea was, if
S3: you've just moved out of home and you haven't got
S3: your glassware yet, go to Carlton Draught or whoever and
S3: grab a slab of pots. And it was pot glasses
S3: with caps on it.
S5: But yeah, it's a screwtop.
S4: Beer in there.
S3: And there was beer in.
S5: A giant screw top.
S3: And then you drink, you drink the pop and then
S3: keep all the glasses at home and you share house.
S5: Yeah, I think they were concerned that it was gonna break,
S5: like in the slab. It could break more because obviously
S5: the stubby is more of a rounded craft glass.
S3: We went we went down the track with it and
S3: tried to see whether they'd come in it, but nah,
S3: it didn't get through. Um, I.
S5: Think the other point is that it's it's just better
S5: drinking out of a pot glass. So you're having more
S5: fun that as well. And later on, you get another glass.
S3: Yes. But do you go back to Luke's idea?
S4: We've just got this. Sounds like an idea that was
S4: nixed ten years ago.
S3: What do you think about clipping a handle to a can?
S5: I love it. I think that'd be great.
S3: So what are you gonna. What are you giving Luke?
S5: What are you. 900.
S4: I feel like Ando did not see that coming.
S5: No, I think it's great. I think we've confused, though.
S3: I mean, Horgs does love a beer, so I think.
S5: That's why I feel like.
S3: We're.
S4: Fooling people. They're going. Hang on a sec. I invented
S4: edible tape. I was barely Finally getting a hundred grand,
S4: if nothing else. Yep. I mean, amazing, eventually. Good luck.
S4: You're 900 grand. That'll give you heaps of confidence, you
S4: would think to take it to the world.
S3: Yeah. Good luck. Luke. That's that's the the the. Well,
S3: you don't win anything today, but you've definitely won the
S3: vote of confidence from the show.
S9: Yeah.
S3: Yeah. That's all you need.
S4: Yeah. Perfect. There you go. He's happy. Yep. He's walked
S4: away a winner. I like to think that we've imagined
S4: a future perfect future here. I mean, even if, let's say,
S4: all of these ideas get up and one day we
S4: may find ourselves at the airport, had a fresh haircut.
S4: We look across, we see someone eating a fully taped
S4: burrito whilst sipping on a beer at the airport, out
S4: of a handle on a cab. I mean, that's a
S4: beautiful future that you want to be part of, isn't it?
S8: Mm. Absolutely.
S3: Um, Luke. Thank you bud. Uh. Hey, guys. Thanks for
S3: coming in.
S5: Thanks, guys.
S3: G I'm looking forward to seeing if any of those go.
S5: I won't invest in any.
S4: So that's why that's, again, this is the Shark tank
S4: feeling where you realise Realize it's great to hear ideas, but, um,
S4: investing is a big leap.
S8: Yeah.
S3: I'm. It's fair to say I'm not going to say 50%
S3: of correspondents, but I'd say 20% of correspondents to Hamish
S3: at the moment is hat related inquiries for our quest
S3: to get the tallest hat, uh, and break the record.
S4: In the world. What I love about our listeners, uh,
S4: is it's got this urgency about it that it's sort
S4: of like, um, it's the town project, and everyone's like,
S4: I've got. I need to tell the guy something like,
S4: I've got, I've got an angle here, and I've got
S4: just so you know, I. Have you thought about this?
S4: Have you thought about that? And we of course have
S4: our we've got our crack team designing the hats update.
S3: For them to come.
S4: I was going to say let's get an update from
S4: those guys because I feel a bit guilty actually being
S4: this far out of the process. But the We're on
S4: the other side of the. We're on the side. Like
S4: the thing we can take care of is how this
S4: is going to run when we actually have a crack
S4: at the world's tallest hat record.
S3: And we were going to do that, we were going
S3: to reach out to Guinness. And we have made some inquiries.
S3: But look, Jack, there's a fair bit of palaver. And
S3: as a show we try and keep palaver to a palaver.
S3: Don't we.
S4: Hate it? Bureaucracy.
S10: Don't the Guinness World Records have a duty of like,
S10: if you say you're going for a world record, they
S10: should really come out and be there to look at it.
S4: No, that would be if they're a government body, I suppose,
S4: and they're not the police where if they hear a
S4: crime happening, they have to go. They're not like the police,
S4: where if they hear something good happening, they must attend.
S4: There's a guy getting in a swimming pool of baked beans,
S4: hold the phone.
S3: But deployed two of our agents there because we've got
S3: some records. The longest nose ring.
S4: Do not get in that bath. We're wearing the most
S4: amount of women's suspenders until we are next to you
S4: and we count the suspenders.
S10: But I thought for their own accuracy, they might want
S10: to always be sending people out because they don't want
S10: to put in print.
S3: It turns out they are a for profit organization and not.
S3: And they should be. So they should be.
S4: And they weren't selling the beer as a charity either.
S4: They're making money on the beer. I think they've always
S4: been up front ongoing. Hey, this is just the stuff
S4: we do. Be involved if you want. I think the
S4: trick they've pulled is by being. They've got us in
S4: this mindset where you proactively have to ask.
S3: Them.
S4: If you are going to do it.
S3: Which again, you have to. There's application forms, there's a cost.
S3: It's quite significant.
S10: You don't have to convince me. I hate all that stuff.
S3: And they.
S4: Said the C word to Jack hates that he hates the.
S3: Cost and they operate out of the UK, which is
S3: tough for us as well with time difference.
S4: Here's the thing to to to final. Just the final
S4: note on the palaver. It was because we know a
S4: lot of people obviously in radio and we've talked about
S4: this before that have gone for Guinness World Records. Then
S4: when you talk to the producers behind the scenes, that's
S4: when you get the real snapshot of the Pallava. They're like, oh,
S4: it was ten grand. It was 20 grand. We had
S4: to do this, really. Mate, it ain't a cheap certificate. But, uh,
S4: you know, those people have made the call that the
S4: content's worth it. Now, when we look at the budget
S4: side of things, we go, well, are they the you know,
S4: if a if a nose ring is inserted in a
S4: nose and no one's there to see it, did it
S4: still happen? Yes it did. I mean, it's one of
S4: the great philosophical questions. If a record is broken and
S4: someone from the beer company wasn't there to measure it,
S4: but others were who were just as trustworthy, did it
S4: still happen? I say yes.
S8: So do I.
S4: Jack.
S10: And I say yes to. And I say they should they?
S4: Well, that's three guesses. I mean, two more okays and
S4: we've got a full house. You can't argue with that.
S4: It's almost an unbeatable hand.
S10: So so we're just going to now play for the record.
S10: But we don't care if it's in the book or not.
S4: We don't care about the book is what I'm saying.
S4: We could just just decide we don't care about the
S4: book because we'll know. We'll know the truth. And the
S4: reason we'll know is here's here's one idea I had.
S4: We thought, do we get, like, the people might remember,
S4: like Tattslotto or Powerball or whatever, where you have government officials?
S4: I think we get people's officials to be there on
S4: the day, trustworthy people, listeners of our show that will
S4: authenticate it. And we'll all know the rules and we'll
S4: play by the same guidelines and more on that in
S4: a second that you have for the Guinness World Records.
S4: But we get, let's say, ten government officials, ten a lot.
S4: Five of the people's officials, five we've flown in or
S4: possibly selected for short drive from the arena. We have
S4: them there and there's a form. We're going to put
S4: a form on our website now because we're looking for
S4: a specific type of person we need to know for
S4: a fact, and you have to provide evidence of times
S4: that you have paid attention, right? Because we need to
S4: pay attention.
S3: People distracted?
S4: Yeah. Examples of the of that, you know, distance because
S4: the hat I think one of the rules is it
S4: has to go for ten meters. So are you the
S4: kind of person that knows about distance? How do you
S4: know about it? Where did you last use that?
S3: And when the hat has to go over to me,
S3: that's walking with a hat on. Yeah.
S4: And with a hat over about 5.5m tall.
S10: But they should know about vertical distance as well.
S3: Exactly. Both horizontal and vertical.
S4: Great question. We can quickly edit the form before it
S4: goes live.
S3: Yes.
S4: This is why we wanted to bring it up. So
S4: that'll be done. And people can register to be the officials.
S10: Is that the only two things?
S3: And evidence that you're trustworthy and trustworthiness.
S10: So they don't have to work for the government in
S10: any way?
S3: No.
S4: No. Why would they? No, no. They're the people.
S10: So you just kept saying government officials.
S3: Well, that.
S4: Was because that's because they gave away $22 million in Powerball.
S4: So that's why people feel comfortable having government officials. But
S4: I just think we go. Yeah. No offense, trustworthy people. Yeah.
S4: I think there's better examples you could give of trustworthiness,
S4: to be honest. So let's just get that you're trustworthy.
S4: You know about the two of the axes of distance.
S4: You know about vertical or horizontal. No requests for depth.
S4: We don't we won't need depth.
S3: You won't be quizzed on depth.
S4: You won't be quizzed on depth. It's A2D test. Um,
S4: I suppose you could argue it depends which end of
S4: the line you're at. If you decide to stand at
S4: the finish line, it will almost all be depth and
S4: there'll be no lateral movement. But again, we'll get you
S4: side on. We'll take care of side on. We'll take
S4: care of this with the seating. So don't worry about that.
S4: We'll take care of that. Make sure it's only two
S4: dimensions at max. We're asking you to measure and you know.
S4: And can you pay attention? Once we've got that, then
S4: I think we can pick our representatives of the people.
S4: I'm getting ahead of myself here, but I just thought
S4: of an idea. Um, once we get this record right.
S3: I love that thinking mentality.
S10: Not if When.
S4: We haven't done a t shirt for ages. Oh, yeah.
S4: Is there merch in it where it's simply a to
S4: scale up the side of the t shirt to scale
S4: replica of, like a stick figure with a 5.5m or
S4: six meter hat on, and it just simply says, like
S4: on the chest, like, I know because I was there
S4: or like, you know, I know because it happened. Yeah.
S4: Or like, I know because.
S10: So it's a t shirt just for the five people
S10: who are coming.
S4: No, no, no, for everyone that listens to the show
S4: because you'll have people going, yeah, but it's on the
S4: Guinness World Records. And we'll be like, yeah, but we
S4: had eyewitnesses. Yes, we had people there. And it was
S4: to the letter on that.
S3: I love the fact that we're getting t shirts made up.
S3: We haven't even got the hats. Haven't even started on that.
S4: Let's see if the hat team can also do t shirts,
S4: since they're in the since they might be at cloth
S4: stage yet. Hey, on that I got a very interesting
S4: email to my side of the fence from a listener
S4: in America that claims to, and I don't have any
S4: reason to doubt them. Wants to stay anonymous. Claims to
S4: know the current holder. I might have said lived in Melbourne,
S4: but it does turn out with a bit of digging.
S4: Does live in America?
S3: Yeah, well, so do they know the rules?
S4: They said, I know the guy, that it took him
S4: years of planning for this. The most recent guy to
S4: get this 5.5m hat record. Like, I know the guy
S4: that did it. And I've been listening with great interest
S4: to your show. This person's a fan of the podcast,
S4: so this is friendly insider information. Said said you pretty
S4: much spot on with all your guidelines, except I'm pretty
S4: sure like this guy that got the record he thought
S4: of and had to cancel plans for any sort of
S4: chinstrap or structure to hold the hat up because we
S4: were thinking of a neck brace cravat, which I still
S4: think is actually legal, but for for the honor, we
S4: won't even use a neck brace covered in a cravat.
S3: So no chin straps.
S4: It just can't have any. Yeah. Can't have a fastener
S4: to the head. It just has to be something that, like,
S4: is placed on the head like a hat. And that's
S4: the other. You can have a.
S3: Heart tightener like a bike helmet. You know how at
S3: the back they have possibly inside?
S4: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
S3: As long as it. So that as long as it
S3: goes horizontal. Not vertical as far as the way the
S3: strap runs around.
S4: Yeah. We just have to tighten it as a hat
S4: band would tighten around your head. But the other thing
S4: is he, he said one of the things that that
S4: cancelled a few of the early designs that this other
S4: guy was thinking of, and we've mentioned a bit to
S4: about just getting a stick that comes off a helmet
S4: kind of thing, a big spire. Is it the hat design?
S4: Apparently the word from Guinness was because I think he's
S4: this guy's was a Santa hat has to be an
S4: existing hat, so you can't create a shape that just
S4: happens to it can't just be a structure that goes
S4: 5.5m up off your head. It has to be not
S4: existing because there are no Santa.
S3: No, but.
S4: You know what I mean.
S3: Style of.
S10: Style of hat that you would instantly go, that's a
S10: Santa hat.
S4: That's been elongated to reach the height requirements, which I
S4: think is good too, because we want to win honorably.
S4: We're not trying to win through a loophole.
S3: Well, we I think we were talking about a top hat,
S3: weren't we?
S4: Well, we've always been talking about a top hat. I
S4: think that's.
S3: Completely.
S10: Which I think is more honorable than a Santa hat.
S10: Santa hat is actually a pretty good idea because you
S10: just need like, a big stick up the middle and
S10: then it hangs over like a tent.
S3: Leave the design to the design team. Yeah, yeah.
S4: You're overstepping. Jack. Stick to the t shirt, mate, because
S4: I don't think we've nailed that design yet. And, oh,
S4: the upset Andys. Boy, oh, boy, I can't stop him.
S4: I try. You hear me? Hear me? Every week on
S4: this show. Going. Stop sending him, guys. He's had enough.
S3: Occasionally. Have a pre-show meeting and you go to Carly,
S3: who runs it for us. Yeah, there's heaps of upset.
S3: You got to get them in. So I don't think
S3: that's you trying to stop it at all?
S4: I'm hoping that by flushing them out.
S10: Yeah. Get them out of the system.
S4: We'll get to the end. Everything is neat and practical,
S4: cause that's the way he likes it. But what if
S4: it wasn't? Upset, Andy. Noah, you've got something to upset
S4: our sweet boy here.
S7: I do, I do. G'day, boys. Gusto to you all.
S3: Oh, Ahoy to you, Noah.
S4: And gusto to you, sir.
S7: Thank you, thank you. Yeah.
S5: So, um, when I say contacts into my phone.
S7: Get a lot of work, phone calls.
S5: And the like, I generally just chuck in the first
S5: name of the person, because I don't always know the
S5: last name.
S7: And so, uh, at the moment, I've got about six different.
S5: Richards.
S7: In my phone when I need to. When I need
S7: to call one, I just pick one at random and
S7: hope for the best.
S3: I mean, I appreciate the sport of it, but yeah,
S3: that's red hot for me. And you know how much
S3: detail is in my contact list, its first name, followed
S3: by second name, followed by where I met you or
S3: your associated business. Beck doesn't love the fact that she's
S3: still in my phone as Rebecca Harding patch waitress. But
S3: that's the cafe. I met her in a cafe.
S4: She hasn't pulled a shift at for well over a year.
S4: Some might say ten. Um. And I've got. I realized
S4: the other day I've got in my phone like a
S4: mate of mine, AJ, who I call a lot, and
S4: then another person I know called AJ, but but I've
S4: just changed them to AJ. Rarely this one. So I
S4: know the other one is the AJ. Yeah, it's a system.
S4: It's a great system.
S3: Now you've upset me. It's nine out of ten.
S4: Jack. Um, Ahoy to you and gusto to you. What
S4: have you got to upset, Andy?
S7: Um, well, our house doesn't have a bath plug. So
S7: the bath was out of action for a long time
S7: until we found nature's bath plug, which is half a lemon.
S7: So you cut half a lemon and just stuff it
S7: in the hole, and then. Yeah, off you go.
S5: Surely.
S4: Take that in your mouth.
S3: Slowly. It's. I mean, they're not.
S7: You get about 40 minutes.
S3: Okay.
S4: Do you put it flat side down and it suctions
S4: it on or do you put it lump jam the
S4: lump side in?
S3: No, no.
S7: Flat side. Flat side down. So it sucks it in
S7: and then. Yeah. I don't.
S3: Hate it. I mean, I hate it, but I don't
S3: hate it because the ingenuity and the choice of plug,
S3: I think is a good one.
S4: It's a great it's a it's a good it's like
S4: a good bit of bush mechanic work. But you what
S4: I love about it and I'm like you here, Jack.
S4: You go. Damn. We don't have a plug. Well, there's
S4: nothing we can do about that. Like, even if it
S4: takes months. No no no no. And you'll often get
S4: an Andy in the periphery going. Go and buy one.
S4: Like we're not. We're not spending half a day just
S4: to get a plug.
S10: Like, literally almost like $1.50.
S5: If.
S4: We remember it. Next time we're at Bunnings, we'll do it.
S4: But that's unlikely. There's nothing we can do about this.
S4: We'll never have a plug again. We must find a way.
S7: Yeah, we've got a bath plug tree at the back.
S7: So you just grab it from the tree and cut
S7: it in half, and off you go.
S3: To bath plugs box that I have in the laundry.
S4: When life gives you two bath plugs stuck together, it's
S4: up to you what you make of it.
S3: Thank you. Jack. Angus, Ahoy to you.
S5: Oh, gusto.
S11: To all, including the little boy.
S10: Ahoy!
S4: Uh, beautiful. Angus, what have you got?
S11: Uh, so, for home use, instead of buying a fancy
S11: reusable razor like you've probably got andoh must be nice.
S11: I just get the disposable travel packs as they're far
S11: better value for money. And you don't have any pressures
S11: about maintaining the blade or anything. So after each shave,
S11: I just chuck the razor back in my bathroom drawer.
S11: So now when I go to shave, I have around
S11: 15 to choose from. And if that razor doesn't work,
S11: I'll just keep swapping them out until I get the
S11: job done.
S4: Yep. And the good thing about a.
S5: Bad shave.
S10: Though.
S3: They're like, they're often single blade.
S10: Yeah.
S11: And you'd be surprised how much gusto these shavers have
S11: in them.
S7: No, I.
S3: Didn't.
S11: At least at least ten goes.
S4: Nah, mate, I want to see Angus. I want to
S4: see you do a big ad. And that be the slogan.
S4: You would be surprised at how much gusto they have
S4: in them.
S11: At least ten. Yeah, at least ten guys. But, like,
S11: I even went overseas last month and it was great
S11: for that too. So I just ran the same system,
S11: by the way, for ten days. And I just grabbed
S11: like a stash of ten, put it in my toiletries
S11: bag and just the way I went.
S3: Why would you waste the room in the toiletries bag
S3: as well? I mean, Bex got her, Bex got her.
S3: We know a lot about Shavers in my house because
S3: Bex got her shaver brand. Louis, Louis. She would be
S3: so upset with your Louis ritual. Your or your ritual,
S3: so to speak.
S4: The thing about the thing I love about chucking a
S4: blunt one back in is.
S3: You can't.
S4: Just seeing if it comes back into form like we're not,
S4: you're not completely fired, but have a bit of time
S4: on the bench and just sharpen. You literally sharpen up
S4: and I'll put you back in the rotation. I mean,
S4: back when.
S5: I.
S11: Put around, I put around ten in the sink and
S11: I put it under hot water. And then I think,
S11: I think that helps, you know, I think it does.
S5: Help as well.
S3: Do you think it helps?
S4: I think I think hot water helps sharpen them up.
S3: Not sharpen them up. But just it feels like.
S4: Well, like when you back in the old days, like
S4: in the, you know, prohibition era when you would get
S4: a hot shave. Wasn't that because they, like.
S3: They heat the blade?
S4: Well, I think it's something like that, isn't it?
S10: Like I thought I thought it was about heating your face,
S10: and then something about, like, the pores are more open.
S4: Maybe that softens the blade. But yeah, if you attack
S4: it with a hot blade, I think we're thinking of
S4: hot knives and butter. And you just go should follow.
S4: Or when you heat the spoon up for ice cream
S4: to get it out of the tub. Like, should be
S4: the same maths. All right. Beautiful. Thanks.
S3: Thanks.
S4: Tess.
S3: Tess. Ahoy to you, Tess.
S12: Ahoy, boys. In number six. Happy birthday. Andoh.
S3: No need.
S4: Lovely.
S12: Um, so when I feed my dog, instead of scooping
S12: the kibble into a bowl, I simply just scoop it
S12: straight across the floor. Um, and the dog licks up
S12: the or eats all the food off the floor. And
S12: he loves it. And it's so efficient because I don't
S12: have to wash any bowls and I don't have to
S12: mop the floor. It comes up sparkling clean every day.
S13: You have to mop the floor like dogs. Do you
S13: know what dogs lick.
S3: When they're out in the wild?
S4: Soap.
S13: Soap.
S3: Pour it in a park.
S4: They find. They find those trees that you can cross
S4: the leaves off and make soap.
S12: Yeah, exactly. Exactly.
S4: No, but are we talking dry food?
S3: Yeah. Dry food.
S4: Dry food.
S12: Yeah. It's kibble.
S4: And it's just.
S12: In one, you know, one section of the of the house.
S12: It's his area, but he licks it, licks it all up,
S12: and it's so it's the cleanest part of the house,
S12: I swear.
S4: Andy, you were missing the key bit of information here.
S4: He loves it.
S3: Okay. No, I mean, I can't totally be repulsed at
S3: this because every time we leave the house, Bec feels
S3: sorry for Henry. So she scatters kibble on the ground
S3: and she runs around and eats it. So Beck doesn't
S3: can slip out without the dog noticing because.
S4: She also she's distracted.
S3: Distracted. So Beck is doing kind of what you're talking about,
S3: and I don't.
S4: Is that to give Henry a fun game to eat
S4: the kibble, or is it so she doesn't see the
S4: door close? Okay.
S3: Okay, I.
S4: Understand.
S3: Um, Jess. Thank you. Wrap this up for us. Bella.
S3: Ahoy to you.
S14: Ahoy, boys. Gusto to you, my king.
S4: And gusto to you, our queen. Yes.
S14: Thank you. Um, so a little bit of a precursor
S14: is I don't have poor time management. I'm just fast
S14: and loose. And I also have one of those really
S14: fancy fridges with the automatic water dispensers, obviously.
S4: Wow. Yeah. No, that's a real. Must be nice.
S14: Yeah, exactly, exactly. So I'm rolling out of bed, like
S14: 15 minutes before I need to leave for work. So
S14: I'm getting ready upstairs doing my hair makeup upstairs trot downstairs.
S14: By that time I'm really parched. So I, you know,
S14: roll over to my fridge, don't grab a cup because
S14: that would just be wasting too much time when I'm
S14: already time poor in the morning. So I tilt the
S14: pelvis forward in front of the fridge, do a really,
S14: really deep lunge. My chin lines up perfectly with the
S14: button for the water dispenser and it just pumps straight
S14: into my mouth. Perfect.
S4: So you don't even have to use your hand.
S10: No hands.
S5: That's right.
S3: Can you can you please send us a video of that?
S3: I that does not upset me.
S4: That is going going to work with rested hands like that.
S1: I don't have.
S14: Energy. And it's the energy of, you know, lifting my
S14: hand up, opening the door, getting the cup out like
S14: I don't.
S5: Have.
S4: Much.
S14: Hand. Morning. Exactly, exactly.
S4: And only what what do you do for a job?
S4: What do you work as?
S14: I'm a social worker, so I need I need all
S14: my my heart power, my brain power, my hand power
S14: to be rested for the day.
S4: And also to when you're opening doors and things like that.
S4: People must come in all the time on your grip
S4: strength and how well rested your arms are on your forearms.
S14: It makes or breaks the day.
S4: Yep.
S14: The only bad thing is because I'm ready for the day.
S14: Upstairs I have my makeup on so there is a
S14: permanent foundation and lipstick mark on my fridge, but I'm
S14: just going to do it again the next day so
S14: it doesn't really matter. And the makeup that's already on
S14: the fridge kind of replaces the makeup I lose from
S14: putting my chin there. So it's like a two for
S14: one reapplication.
S3: Surprisingly, that's the only bit that upsets me. The mark
S3: on the fridge. Yeah, I'd be swinging around to clean
S3: that up, but Bella, thanks. Send us it in. Really good.
S4: And oh, you had the great fortune of being in
S4: New York last weekend, am I correct?
S3: A quick.
S4: Dash, just a.
S3: Quick.
S4: Dash rostered on at the.
S3: Pub.
S4: You had to go and.
S3: You.
S4: Were late for your shift.
S3: You were just.
S4: Such a bummer. Yeah. So. But again, um, you know.
S3: Wasn't even rostered on someone called sick manager called and said, hey,
S3: can you fill in for the shift? Yeah. No problem.
S4: It's in under 30 hours. Over 30 hours. I'll be there, boss. Yeah. And, um,
S4: and don't worry. And even though you did get delayed
S4: and you didn't get a chance to fill in the
S4: Ticket and supporting documentation will be neatly presented to the
S4: tax office. Absolutely to show needed to be there. But
S4: I must say I looked on with great joy and
S4: not even envy. Anders, you were at the pub that
S4: we have a small interest in in New York City
S4: over the weekend.
S3: Old mates? Yep.
S4: Old mates if you happen to be in town. We
S4: do like to do a long, very long shot plug
S4: in case anyone happens to be in town. Um, in
S4: New York.
S3: Uh, loyalty card is accepted.
S4: It is, it is. And, um. God, we're bloody proud
S4: of that. One thing I will, um, I will say is,
S4: I think and again, I'm not saying that, you know,
S4: one day when you're a, when you're a father, you
S4: might still travel with such reckless abandon as you do
S4: and go to New York for a small handful of days.
S4: But I think, Jack, if you didn't know us and
S4: and I was to say this was my weekend versus
S4: this was Andy's weekend, I think based off the one
S4: sentence of going, and he was in New York City
S4: to pub and hanging out with Hugh Jackman. And I
S4: was at a cat show on Sunday morning to see
S4: the 1030 kittens judging.
S10: I would know which one is apparent.
S4: You would go, who has a seven year old daughter?
S4: You would know. You would get a feel. You would
S4: just get a feel from that. Um, so yeah, I
S4: was at the Cat Lovers Association. I think it was
S4: called or Cat Lovers Forever cat show at the Sydney
S4: Convention Center.
S3: So what was the cat show where they were people
S3: bringing in their own cats to show, or were they
S3: already pre vetted cats that with more show experience.
S10: Your two cats aren't show cats are they?
S4: Could be.
S3: Didn't.
S4: Didn't put them on the bench.
S3: If you.
S4: Didn't put.
S3: Them on Zoe's pillow.
S4: He's got over that now. And that is a unique trick.
S4: Um no didn't didn't couldn't take our potato and Jimmy,
S4: he wouldn't. I don't think they'd go well at a
S4: cat show just because there's a lot of other cats around.
S4: I'm as surprised as you guys are that we were
S4: going so bought the tickets for this because she follows
S4: a funny cat show. And this American guy on Instagram, right?
S4: I think his name is Steven. He's like known on
S4: Instagram for like doing like they bring the cat up
S4: and they're like, oh yeah, look at this guy. He's
S4: look at that beautiful long body. And we're looking this
S4: breed we're looking for like, wow, nice strong shoulders. And
S4: the kids find it funny.
S3: From this content on my algorithm.
S10: So I can't.
S4: Stress enough how much it's not golf swings or gadgets.
S4: So it's not on my algorithm either. Kids love it.
S4: So zoo goes a couple of weeks ago she goes,
S4: guess what guys? You know the funny guy we see
S4: on Instagram? He's coming to Sydney and I bought his
S4: tickets to the cat show.
S10: There's one thing to enjoy a 15 second video though.
S4: I said, why did we? So why did you do that?
S4: And she goes, it's funny. I said, yeah, but now
S4: we have to do the joke. We have to live
S4: the joke. So I'm like, you know what? Whatever. Let's
S4: let's go and see the. And look, there's some great
S4: cats there. As I was sort of looking around though
S4: for other people because I love our cats, but it's
S4: but I don't love all cats. I was really into it.
S4: And this is great. She loves our cats and and
S4: that's that's great. How's this for a bombshell, though? Like,
S4: she was really into it when we got. And I
S4: was getting a lot of. Hurry up, hurry up. He's
S4: on at 1030 like, you know. And I said, mate,
S4: it's like 9:45. We're gonna make it. And then I
S4: was like, well, there's parking and if there's a queue
S4: or whatever, great news. When we got there. Not a
S4: huge queue like the convention center. The convention center holds
S4: like 10,000 people. And again, it was a great show,
S4: well attended, but I would say low 300 was attendance.
S4: So there was a lot of space for us to
S4: all to enjoy the cats and products on show that morning.
S3: But on.
S13: Cats like.
S3: Traditionally hard to herd like the whole.
S4: Like, yeah, you have to hold them. And I think
S4: a few of them are on, um, just like a gummy. Yeah.
S4: Just to relax a little bit. So and look again
S4: a couple of great cats.
S10: So did they do anything like dogs do. Do they
S10: walk around in circles and.
S4: No. It's just to show off how well that breed
S4: meets the criteria for that breed, I suppose. Oh, mate,
S4: don't scrunch your.
S5: Nose.
S4: Because that's no different to a dog show. Don't get to.
S4: I could easily.
S10: See I'm not going to a dog show either, but at.
S4: Least easily see Beck making any go to a dog show.
S4: No worries at all. Best in show is in Andy's future.
S4: Singing a duet about tall terriers is 100% in Andy's future.
S3: Sadly, you might be right.
S4: Well, how's this? So you'll get ready for this when
S4: you know, a few years down the track with Beck,
S4: Zo turns to me and not, as a joke goes,
S4: you know, just letting you know this. And by the way,
S4: this is like we're in our early 40s, but this
S4: is where you have those bolts, where you're like, wow,
S4: we're really going to be married forever. Because and you
S4: just realize that because I think when people get married,
S4: you know, 30, 40, you know, it's forever. But you also.
S10: You just think.
S4: All the time you're so young and it's just you
S4: just think life will be pretty much like this. So
S4: just letting you know in the future I might breed cats.
S4: Oh my God, am I went, oh man, that is.
S4: You can't just say that casually at a cat show.
S4: And then I start looking around. And a lot of
S4: the displays are husband and wife teams. And I did
S4: feel like the husband was the second invite to the
S4: like the second person into the fact.
S10: Not as passionate, maybe.
S4: And I might be really projecting my fears here, but
S4: I was like, I am going to be I'm going
S4: to be a cat caddy, like I'm going to be just.
S4: And but I was like, so you. And she's like, well,
S4: that's I'm just letting you know my future that I
S4: could see that happening. It's so cute. Wouldn't it be
S4: amazing to have, like, all these little cats?
S3: Would you say to that?
S4: I panicked, I was thinking I was panicking because in
S4: my head I was like, you can't just drop this
S4: on someone. That's a huge life change. That's not what
S4: I got into this for. But then, and you could
S4: make the same argument, I thought. To thought. To be
S4: fair though, with golf, like, she could be like, well,
S4: I never saw golf coming. And now you're into golf.
S3: And you're way five hours at a time. And yeah.
S4: But again, that's off site. That is.
S3: Off.
S4: Site. I'm not chipping golf balls around the house and like,
S4: making the clubs get in bed with us.
S10: Yeah, but that's not true because you sent me a
S10: video last week of you using a swing aid. And
S10: it's a golf club you can use inside half the length.
S10: And he let it go out of his hand, and
S10: he smashed her family portrait.
S3: Can I see.
S5: This.
S3: Video?
S4: No, I'll show it to you. But I just said Jack,
S4: because I was going to give Jack the same swing,
S4: and it'd just be really careful of these things. They've
S4: got slippery, slippery handles. That's true. And if I catch
S4: those swinging the cats around in the good room, I'll.
S4: I'll be as angry as she was over the portrait.
S2: Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return
S2: next week. Catch up or contribute at Hamish and Andy Comm.