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Speaker 1: When I'm at my wife. I wasn't attracted to her

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Speaker 1: at all. Wow, not in the slightest.

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Speaker 2: So, Gabriel, you just woke up and chose violence.

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Speaker 1: That day, I watched the episode, so I knew what

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Speaker 1: was going on, and I was like, man, that'd be

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Speaker 1: really funny.

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Speaker 2: Were you surprised when I commented?

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Speaker 1: So yes, I was, and I was like, A you're

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Speaker 1: not gonna respond. He was like, what's your story?

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Speaker 3: It is welcome to their future wife you podcast, my homies,

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Speaker 3: Gabriel bar redman and.

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Speaker 2: His significant other Adriana turn time. How y'all doing well?

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Speaker 4: Doing well?

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Speaker 1: Wonderful? What is y'all's relationship that we are actually engaged?

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Speaker 2: Y'allre engaged? He said he liked it, so he put

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Speaker 2: a ring.

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Speaker 4: On it congratulation. I was heavy on.

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Speaker 5: I didn't want to teach someone about Jesus. That's not

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Speaker 5: everybody's testimony.

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Speaker 4: But I was like, I don't want to do that.

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Speaker 2: Boy, you didn't want to do the evangelism with your husband.

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Speaker 5: Once we got to know each other and actually had

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Speaker 5: real conversations, his responses weren't like the typical male responses

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Speaker 5: I've gotten in the past, and I was.

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Speaker 4: Like, Oh, it's okay, it's different.

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Speaker 1: We were fasting, I was praying. Lord said, I want

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Speaker 1: you to go watch the Dear Future Wifey podcast with

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Speaker 1: Albanor his Lovely Wife. One of the things he said

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Speaker 1: that just really grasped my spirits. He said that the

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Speaker 1: Lord told him, you're saying this.

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Speaker 2: It's no longer an asset to you. It's ability.

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Speaker 1: It's a liability. You need, as you said, a purpose partner.

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Speaker 1: You need a partner who's going to help further your

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Speaker 1: purpose and further what I called you to do. So

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Speaker 1: I said, okay, I got what you needed me to get.

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Speaker 1: Let me triple check. Let me go to the word.

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Speaker 1: Now pastors lights up and proverbs. Fathers can give their

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Speaker 1: sons wealth, but only the Lord can give an understanding.

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Speaker 1: He said, gave all those other women that you dated

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Speaker 1: were your choice. This is my choice. I'm like, what

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Speaker 1: if she don't fit in? I don't know if she's

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Speaker 1: ready for the life that you have called me to.

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Speaker 1: And he was like, were you?

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Speaker 3: What started as a search for understanding became a journey

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Speaker 3: of transformation. Every letter that I wrote led me to

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Speaker 3: this day.

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Speaker 2: The day I.

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Speaker 3: Got married November twenty second, twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 2: Dear my forever, Forever.

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Speaker 6: Is a long time. That's how long I'll love you.

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Speaker 6: Those lyrics echo through every fiber of my soul at

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Speaker 6: the very thought of you.

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Speaker 3: This journey has culminated with you as both the award

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Speaker 3: and the reward of my pursuit of love. You are

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Speaker 3: the award, the honor God placed before me, the recognition

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Speaker 3: of growth, healing, and becoming the man I needed to be.

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Speaker 6: And you are the reward, the blessing given after endurance,

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Speaker 6: the gift promised to those who refuse to faint.

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Speaker 3: This isn't just our story, this is wrong of us.

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Speaker 3: I'm the TerraSAR Whitfield.

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Speaker 4: I'm Ashley are Whitfield.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Deer Podcast. Welcome to the Dear Future

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Speaker 2: Wifie Podcast. I'm your host of Tarrasar.

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Speaker 4: Whitfield and I'm Ashley our Whitfield.

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Speaker 2: Listen, are you still shocking up with us? Come on?

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Speaker 2: This is season eleven.

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Speaker 3: We're about to go on our six year anniversary of

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Speaker 3: the Dear Future Wifie Podcast on April fifteenth, And I'm

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Speaker 3: telling y'all, if you haven't subscribed, what are you waiting for?

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you why. It's so important to subscribe.

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Speaker 3: It's because opportunities brand deal sponsorship. They go to my

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Speaker 3: YouTube channel and they see how many people are engaged

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Speaker 3: with a small commitment of hitting that subscription button as

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Speaker 3: well as you get a chance to be notified first

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Speaker 3: when we dropping episodes, so make sure you turn on

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Speaker 3: that notification bell so you be notified about upcoming episodes.

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Speaker 2: And let's go ahead and build this community.

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Speaker 3: We're going to be doing some amazing things as the

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Speaker 3: year progresses so that we can order community. I want

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Speaker 3: to see more single people be connected with their purpose partners,

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Speaker 3: so we're really looking forward to that. If you haven't

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Speaker 3: gotten the book Student of Love, what are you waiting for?

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Speaker 3: This book will help transform your life. It will create

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Speaker 3: a new it will help you be able to see

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Speaker 3: love differently. A lot of us have been regurgitating some

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Speaker 3: bad habits that have been preventing us from encountering the

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Speaker 3: love that God has designed for us. And Student of

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Speaker 3: Love is the classroom that's going to take you into

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Speaker 3: Love's classroom and teach you how to see love differently,

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Speaker 3: explore love differently.

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Speaker 2: And be the love that you desire.

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Speaker 3: So I'm so excited to talk to this couple today.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to a different WIFEI podcasts my homies, Gabriel bar Redman.

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Speaker 2: And his significant other Adrianna Term time.

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Speaker 1: How y'all doing wonderful?

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Speaker 2: Now? Listen, how do we meet? Gabriel?

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Speaker 1: Well, funny enough, we met because I did a spoof

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Speaker 1: of your podcast.

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Speaker 2: What was that?

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Speaker 3: Matter of fact? I want you telling us a spoof.

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Speaker 3: We're gonna go ahead and drop it right now. Look

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Speaker 3: at look at what Gabriel did to you. Look look

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Speaker 3: at this real quick, and.

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Speaker 2: You know it's crazy.

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Speaker 1: When I'm at my wife, I wasn't attracted to her

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Speaker 1: at all, not in the slightest truth of the matter

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Speaker 1: is I wanted her sister's That's what I wanted. Now,

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Speaker 1: sister was bad, That's why I want it. But I

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Speaker 1: thank God that he saw fit to give me what

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Speaker 1: I needed, not what I wanted.

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Speaker 6: Is good.

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Speaker 1: He didn't care about what I wanted. He gave me

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Speaker 1: what I needed. Was I happy about it? No, of

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Speaker 1: course not. But living for God is not about happiness.

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Speaker 1: It's about purpose. That's good.

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Speaker 2: Doc, that's good.

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Speaker 1: The Bible says that he that findeth the wife finds

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Speaker 1: a good thing. Right, And when I found her, I

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Speaker 1: thought she was a terrible thing, but she's good to me.

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Speaker 2: Now.

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Speaker 1: Do I still think about her sister sometimes? Of course?

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Speaker 1: Of course, right right, But I know what I got.

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Speaker 1: It's from the Lord.

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Speaker 2: That'll preach.

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Speaker 1: It's from the Lord. And that's what matters, guys, that's

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Speaker 1: what matters. Get you a woman from God, whether you

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Speaker 1: like it or not.

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Speaker 2: It's so gay, bro, you just woke up and chose

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Speaker 2: violence that day. What did I do to you?

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Speaker 1: Nothing?

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Speaker 2: Nothing.

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Speaker 1: It wasn't even you. It was just I just I

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Speaker 1: saw that. I saw people talking about it, and I'm like, man,

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Speaker 1: that's really funny. I watched the episode, so I knew,

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Speaker 1: I knew what was going on, and I was like, man,

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Speaker 1: that'd be really funny. So I just I just recorded

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Speaker 1: the video sitting down the airs, I was I was

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Speaker 1: watching Law and Order, and I was like, I'm gonna

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna just do this. I want to post. So

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Speaker 1: I did the video and as I'm doing it, I'm

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Speaker 1: thinking of things that I can say a little bit

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Speaker 1: from the podcast and unfortunately to say a little bit

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Speaker 1: from personal experience. And I just posted it. I was like,

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Speaker 1: we'll see what.

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Speaker 2: I come back an hour later, it's the video with

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Speaker 2: the steals. Okay, yeah, he spoofed.

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Speaker 3: The steal storyline and just went in. Were you surprised

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Speaker 3: when I commented.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, yes I was because I did not think.

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Speaker 1: I was like, he probably won't see this, you know,

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Speaker 1: Notarious is a big time you know, he probably don't

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Speaker 1: checking his dams and now he ain't gonna say even

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Speaker 1: people were sagging him in it. And then I saw

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Speaker 1: the Dear Future WiFi podcast commented. I'm like, what did

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Speaker 1: I say? He said? He said, because you commented you

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Speaker 1: you laughed. And then I was like, hey, you should

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Speaker 1: uh invite me to the podcaste me to the podcast

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Speaker 1: and I was like, ah, you're not gonna respond. He

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Speaker 1: was fro He was like, what's your story? What is

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Speaker 1: my story? I'm shooting my shot and I'm even ready

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Speaker 1: for it to go in. But yeah, and then we

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Speaker 1: you know, I kind of told you my story, and

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Speaker 1: then you know, I kind of left it at that.

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Speaker 1: It still kept blowinging up. It was probably like a

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Speaker 1: few days later. I'm driving home from seeing her actually

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Speaker 1: and I get a phone call from Whitfield Films and

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Speaker 1: I'm like, do I know anybody? I wouldn't go to

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Speaker 1: answer because you know sometimes Yeah, he spam and I

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Speaker 1: was like, but I'm an answer it. And I answered

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Speaker 1: it and he was like, man, and one more person

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Speaker 1: send me this video. I'm like, oh, ain't no way,

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Speaker 1: how did this he's the fans? How did he get

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Speaker 1: my number? How did he get my number?

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Speaker 2: He was watching order, remember.

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Speaker 1: Right, and so you you know, we talked. We chopped

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Speaker 1: it up and again kind of just was like, well

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Speaker 1: that was nice. That was a nice gesture. Lord, it

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Speaker 1: was nice. I got to talk to him. If I

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Speaker 1: get on, hey, if I don't, I'm gonna still keep watching.

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Speaker 1: Little did I know a short while later you would

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Speaker 1: invite me on.

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Speaker 3: You know why, because I love when I see someone

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Speaker 3: I feel like I'm old when I say young people,

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Speaker 3: but when I see young people take love seriously. And

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Speaker 3: I had a conversation with you, and you were so

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Speaker 3: all transparent, vulnerable and let me know your relationship journey

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Speaker 3: and how intentional you are becoming with Adriana here. And

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Speaker 3: I was like, I like this because I'm a champion

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Speaker 3: of young love. I believe that if you can make

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Speaker 3: a decision at the age that y'all are, that you

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Speaker 3: can build something together. And I always quote my boy

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Speaker 3: Jason Wilson on this. He said when he and his

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Speaker 3: wife got together in their twenties, he said, we got

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Speaker 3: it together together, and so you don't have to have

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Speaker 3: everything figured out. We've been believing the lie that, you know,

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Speaker 3: at a young age, you got to get your stuff together,

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Speaker 3: You got to make sure you have your own house together,

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Speaker 3: you got to make sure you have of course, you

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Speaker 3: may have transportation to have a car.

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Speaker 2: You know, make sure you have transportation.

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Speaker 3: But they feel like you have to be in the

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Speaker 3: career that you want and everything has to be figured out,

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Speaker 3: and it's just it goes against what I believe that

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Speaker 3: God created a woman to be his suitable helper, his helpmate.

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Speaker 3: So if you got it all together, then that's why

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Speaker 3: a lot of men in their forties and fifties don't

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Speaker 3: even find the value in a wife because they like,

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Speaker 3: I ain't got my stuff together. What you're gonna do,

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Speaker 3: What you're gonna add to my life because they already

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Speaker 3: did it. But if you can have somebody that was

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Speaker 3: supporting you, and y'all supporting each other, building each other

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Speaker 3: up through those moments where y'all were trying to figure

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Speaker 3: it out, then it adds more value into the relationship.

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Speaker 2: That's what I believe. That's my story and I'm sticking

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Speaker 2: to it.

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Speaker 1: That's so true. It's so true.

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Speaker 2: So how old you Gabriel?

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Speaker 1: I am thirty two, and.

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Speaker 2: How do you?

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Speaker 4: I am twenty seven?

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Speaker 2: And what is y'all's relationship status?

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Speaker 1: Well, we are actually engaged.

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Speaker 2: Y'all are engaged. He said he liked it, so he

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Speaker 2: put a ring on it.

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Speaker 4: Congratulations, congratulations.

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Speaker 2: So when when did this take place? When this proposal

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Speaker 2: take place?

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Speaker 1: This happened in December twenty First, Uh, well, I can

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Speaker 1: tell my little part, but she an' she wasn't pressuring me,

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Speaker 1: but she was making it known that I'd like to

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Speaker 1: be a fiance.

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Speaker 5: Okay, I'll preface this because you know when we when

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Speaker 5: we were going out, we go out, we go to

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Speaker 5: some of his events where he's like preaching, like, oh

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Speaker 5: and Gabriel's girlfriend. I was like, oh, the title girlfriend

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Speaker 5: is becoming humiliating.

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Speaker 3: Now, first quantified this, how long have y'all been dating

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Speaker 3: at this.

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Speaker 4: Point only a few months?

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Speaker 2: Okay, and you already felt like it was humiliating.

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Speaker 5: Yes, because we were at a different stage of more

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Speaker 5: than just boyfriend and girlfriend, and I knew it, and

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Speaker 5: I was like, you know, it's not It's not suitable

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Speaker 5: for us anymore. And I'm feeling more of a fiance

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Speaker 5: vibe now.

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Speaker 4: So but I wasn't. I never pressured him. No, I

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Speaker 4: never pressured him.

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Speaker 2: She made yes that I was humiliatingfriend.

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Speaker 4: Yes. And sometimes he's like, you know, my your wife.

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Speaker 4: I said, you can't say that.

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Speaker 5: I'm still a girlfriend, say future wife up and there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 4: So how did how did y'all meet?

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Speaker 1: Well, we originally met in twenty twenty three. So I

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Speaker 1: woke up. I'm supposed to go play for a church

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Speaker 1: because I played the piano, and the Lord is like,

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Speaker 1: don't go play today. I said, m I need my money.

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Speaker 1: I want a worship. He's like, don't don't go play today.

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Speaker 1: So I said, okay, cool, Where do you want me

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Speaker 1: to go? This church popped up called MotorCity Church in Detroit,

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Speaker 1: and I said, oh, okay, I'll go there. I felt

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Speaker 1: it in my spirit to go there. I go there.

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Speaker 1: I go in the lobby. It's a nice church, a

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Speaker 1: lot of young people, and I'm just standing there looking around.

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Speaker 1: I'm trying to be in the spirit. I gotta see

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Speaker 1: what does the Lord want? Me here for. Why did

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Speaker 1: you bring me here?

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Speaker 2: You want me a.

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Speaker 1: Minister to somebody? You want me here the sermon? What

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Speaker 1: what you want me here for? And so, uh, I'm

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Speaker 1: looking for a seat and this beautiful young lady taps

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Speaker 1: me on my shoulder and says, are you Gabriel? And

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Speaker 1: I say yeah, and she says I love your music

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Speaker 1: because I do. I do Christian rap, and so she

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Speaker 1: had heard my music and she said, I just I

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Speaker 1: love your music.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, okay, Christian rap.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So she says she liked my music and I was like, okay,

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Speaker 1: that's cool.

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Speaker 2: That's cool.

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Speaker 1: But I'm I'm trying to be in.

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Speaker 4: Spirit mind you.

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Speaker 5: At this time, I'm talking to him and he's a

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Speaker 5: little taller than me and I'm like, oh, yeah, like

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Speaker 5: I love your music and he's like oh like looking

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Speaker 5: over my head and I was like, oh, I see

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Speaker 5: that's the kind of artist he is.

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Speaker 4: So I was like, let me just go take my seat.

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Speaker 5: And the person I was I was not like with with,

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Speaker 5: but we went to church together, invited him to sit

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Speaker 5: with us, and I was like I saw him walk

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Speaker 5: by and I said, why are he's sitting next to me?

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Speaker 5: And I just I was had a little steak attitude

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Speaker 5: because I was like, okay, so what did you think

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Speaker 5: He was thinking that he was like another groupie? And

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Speaker 5: I told him to later on. I said, I'm not

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Speaker 5: going to be one of your groupies. And he's like,

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Speaker 5: I don't have groupies. And I said, oh, yes, she she.

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Speaker 1: I will admit I was not giving her the attention

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Speaker 1: that she deserves.

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Speaker 2: Why focused on Jesus.

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Speaker 1: Yes, he was trying to stay to stay in the spirit. Yes,

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, yeah, she's fine, but we got to

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Speaker 1: stay focused. I'm here for you for Jesus, here for

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Speaker 1: you Jesus. So I go and I said, now, I'm

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Speaker 1: still trying to figure out what you got me here for. Yes,

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh, you probably want me to hear

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Speaker 1: the sermon this preacher about the preacher good Word. He

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Speaker 1: goes up and he says, today we're going to talk

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Speaker 1: about marriage. Really, yes, really, say, I ain't nobody in here. Lord,

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Speaker 1: what are you doing? Nah, you're trying to play me.

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Speaker 1: You're a joke store. I know how you are a lord.

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Speaker 1: And so I listened to the sermon. It's a great sermon.

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Speaker 1: It was the last day for him to preach that

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Speaker 1: sermon and afterwards I'm like okay or something yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: And I was like, okay, well you probably maybe you

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Speaker 1: want me to fill out a car I can connect

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Speaker 1: with this pastor maybe you want me a minister or

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Speaker 1: play I'm filling out the car. He's like, stop, I

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Speaker 1: don't need you here. Well, why did you bring me here?

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Speaker 1: He's like, I don't need you to serve here. And

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Speaker 1: I was like, okay, I'm ready to go. Then, so

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Speaker 1: I'm walking out. I am baffled. I'm confused because I

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Speaker 1: couldn't see what the Lord was doing in that moment.

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Speaker 1: And so that was how that was the first day

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Speaker 1: we met.

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Speaker 4: Well, and then afterwards we congregated in the lobby and him,

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Speaker 4: me and my friend were talking whole time. Still He's like, yep,

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Speaker 4: he was looking over your head.

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Speaker 5: Looking over my head, not really paying attention to me.

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Speaker 5: And I said, it's time, it's time to go. He's

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Speaker 5: not paying it.

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Speaker 4: I said, I'm cool. I thought he's gonna be a

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Speaker 4: chill guy, but I guess not. So that was that

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Speaker 4: was the first the first time we met.

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Speaker 3: But so when you met him, what did you think?

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Speaker 3: Were you like, Oh, were you like interested him and

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Speaker 3: you just want to just be.

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Speaker 2: Cool with him.

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Speaker 5: Well, I was a little shocked because I was telling

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Speaker 5: my friend that weekend before that I put her onto

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Speaker 5: his music Wow, and I was like, he's actually from

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Speaker 5: Michigan and she was like, girl, what if you meet

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Speaker 5: him one day? I said really yes. I was like,

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Speaker 5: I'm never going to meet him. He lives all the

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Speaker 5: way like far from me. And then the next on Sunday,

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Speaker 5: I see him and she's like, you want to talk

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Speaker 5: to him?

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Speaker 4: And I was like, I'm gonna talk to him. I'm

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Speaker 4: not a groupie.

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Speaker 3: So you tell me you had a conversation with your

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Speaker 3: homegirl the week before and said, there's no First of all,

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Speaker 3: how did you know where you live?

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Speaker 2: You was talking Tom, come on, tell me.

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Speaker 1: About that first d M.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, well okay, So his album cover.

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Speaker 4: I was trying to zoom in on it because to

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Speaker 4: see like him because he's like a little picture, it's

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Speaker 4: like him.

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Speaker 5: And I was like, where does he live? So Facebook

363
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Speaker 5: tell you everything? So found him on Facebook and I

364
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Speaker 5: was like hearing this, Oh well I found him on

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Speaker 5: Facebook and I was like, he lives in Michigan. And

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Speaker 5: then I was like, then I sent him a d M,

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Speaker 5: and I said, specifically, I'm not trying to shoot my shots.

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Speaker 5: I just want you to know that it's a shame

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Speaker 5: that you wrap this well and you live in my

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Speaker 5: town and didn't tell nobody.

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Speaker 2: So that was it, you know now that.

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Speaker 4: Now that I reset, it does sound like truthfully truthfully,

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Speaker 4: I was like.

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Speaker 5: I'm not trying to shoot my shots. I don't want

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Speaker 5: to be a groupie. So that's what happened.

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Speaker 2: Did you see that?

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Speaker 1: I did see it, and I responded, because I mean,

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Speaker 1: I've I'm not trying to be boastful, but I have

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Speaker 1: gotten DMS before from women and they have said, you know, hey,

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Speaker 1: you know I like your music, I think you're cute,

381
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Speaker 1: things like that, and so she I like the way

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Speaker 1: she said it. You know that she wasn't really trying

383
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Speaker 1: to shoot her shot. She was just letting me know.

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Speaker 1: I could tell her she was genuine appreciation for the

385
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Speaker 1: music and everything. And I responded, I said, well, look, hey,

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Speaker 1: if I knew that you lived in Michigan, I would

387
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Speaker 1: have you know, we could have connected it and everything.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and then what happened just nothing happened after that point,

389
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Speaker 3: not a thing, No, So how long what was the

390
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Speaker 3: time span between that moment and when you saw him

391
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Speaker 3: at church?

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Speaker 4: That was I think it was the same year.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was the same year. It was probably like,

394
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Speaker 1: I don't know, maybe six months later.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, So and then you guys became friends.

396
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Speaker 4: Acquaintance, acquaintance, acquaintance.

397
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Speaker 3: Back up, where were you at in your relationship journey?

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Speaker 3: Did you have a girlfriend during that time when she DMG?

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Speaker 1: No, So I had when she had DM me. I

400
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Speaker 1: think that was like late to twenty twenty two and

401
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Speaker 1: maybe early twenty twenty three, And so prior to that

402
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Speaker 1: I had GOT, I was in a relationship that I

403
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Speaker 1: thought was the Lord. I was so certain about it,

404
00:19:14,600 --> 00:19:17,960
Speaker 1: and the Lord didn't reveal that that was not his will,

405
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Speaker 1: and so I was really messed up about that. And

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Speaker 1: so that was that was my final straw of like

407
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Speaker 1: a young I clearly don't do a good job of picking.

408
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Speaker 1: So you pick Lord, you do what you gotta do.

409
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Speaker 1: So I let it all go. And I was still

410
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Speaker 1: kind of healing from that because it wasn't even that

411
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Speaker 1: the breakup. I mean, obviously that was sad. You know,

412
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Speaker 1: anytime you break up with somebody, you know it's sad,

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Speaker 1: but it was the fact that I was so certain

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Speaker 1: that it was God, and to find out that it wasn't.

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Speaker 1: That really kind of hindered my confidence in hearing from

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Speaker 1: the Lord, especially about relationships, and so I really had

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Speaker 1: to take some time to heal from that. And so

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Speaker 1: by the time she DM me, I was still healing.

419
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Speaker 1: I was on the tail end of it. It was

420
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Speaker 1: a lot better, but I was not looking for another

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Speaker 1: relationship at the time.

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Speaker 3: So we talked about this. Prior to the interview. You

423
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Speaker 3: said that you was in the season of total surrender

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Speaker 3: to God, where you was like, I'm just it's your

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Speaker 3: wheel guide and you.

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Speaker 2: Had no time for a woman.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and you really believed that. Yeah, I listened. I

428
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Speaker 1: got so many no's. I'll be I'll be transparent herefage

429
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Speaker 1: wife podcast. I had dated five women prior to her okay,

430
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Speaker 1: and every single one of them was no. It was

431
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Speaker 1: no first one, no second one, no third one. It

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Speaker 1: was no. And I should have listened because he wore

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Speaker 1: me before. He told me to go on a fast

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Speaker 1: from girls, and I said, how do I do that?

435
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Speaker 1: He was like, I want don't ask me about them,

436
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Speaker 1: don't come to me and say, oh is this don't

437
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Speaker 1: ask me nothing, and so he said if I didn't listen,

438
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Speaker 1: there would be some drama. And I was like, okay,

439
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,440
Speaker 1: but I didn't listen because I can be stubborn sometimes,

440
00:21:08,560 --> 00:21:13,040
Speaker 1: and so all those other women like I had thought like,

441
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Speaker 1: I can make a life with them. I can make

442
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:16,960
Speaker 1: this work, even in the situations that I knew wasn't

443
00:21:17,000 --> 00:21:22,480
Speaker 1: good for me. But it wasn't until when I met

444
00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:25,040
Speaker 1: her that I was that the Lord's really started to

445
00:21:25,359 --> 00:21:26,879
Speaker 1: heal from me. Because you know, sometimes you can have

446
00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:30,920
Speaker 1: a little you get so many no's that it's hard

447
00:21:30,920 --> 00:21:34,840
Speaker 1: for you to hear when it's yes. So was I was.

448
00:21:37,680 --> 00:21:40,920
Speaker 1: I was in a better place, but not the greatest place, and.

449
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:45,240
Speaker 3: So you were total surrendered. God, I ain't even thinking

450
00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:47,280
Speaker 3: about these women. I'm gonna just follow your wills. I'm

451
00:21:47,359 --> 00:21:49,600
Speaker 3: questioning whether or not I can actually hear from you at

452
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:52,639
Speaker 3: this point. Yeah, And I noticed a lot in this conversation.

453
00:21:52,880 --> 00:21:55,600
Speaker 3: You really take it to heart hearing from God. You

454
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:59,159
Speaker 3: even said you were about to go perform or you

455
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:01,560
Speaker 3: play piano at a church, and you said you said

456
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:03,880
Speaker 3: God spoke to you and said, don't even go do that.

457
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:05,960
Speaker 3: Don't even go do your quote unquote gig. I hate

458
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,400
Speaker 3: to call church opportunities gigs, but don't even go do that.

459
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:13,200
Speaker 3: Go to a church and just go sit and everything

460
00:22:13,240 --> 00:22:17,360
Speaker 3: you keep saying is God said. God said, and yeah,

461
00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:20,200
Speaker 3: I understand how hearing? And then now you can you

462
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:23,879
Speaker 3: don't even trust your own ear to the mouth of

463
00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:27,160
Speaker 3: God and you go, well, okay, I must I must

464
00:22:27,240 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 3: be hearing wrong, and it's just let me just tap

465
00:22:29,560 --> 00:22:32,880
Speaker 3: out of this. How did you so when she DMed you,

466
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,000
Speaker 3: you didn't even take it to heart. You just was like,

467
00:22:35,840 --> 00:22:37,320
Speaker 3: I'm not even gonna pursue it. And then what did

468
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:38,560
Speaker 3: you think when he didn't respond?

469
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:41,800
Speaker 4: I mean, I was being honest.

470
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,879
Speaker 5: I was not trying to shoot my shot because I

471
00:22:44,920 --> 00:22:47,600
Speaker 5: also just came out of a relationship. So I was

472
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:51,600
Speaker 5: just like, oh cool, I know somebody now who I

473
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:54,040
Speaker 5: like their music and they're from my stake.

474
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:58,680
Speaker 3: So so what the last relationship you got into? Were

475
00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:01,119
Speaker 3: you ever in a relationship prior to this one that

476
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:03,400
Speaker 3: you thought that was the one?

477
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:07,040
Speaker 2: Wasn't there?

478
00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:14,960
Speaker 5: I told you everything, honestly, The first one I only

479
00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:19,919
Speaker 5: was in really like really two real relationships, and the

480
00:23:19,960 --> 00:23:21,760
Speaker 5: first one I was young, I was a kid, I

481
00:23:21,760 --> 00:23:25,080
Speaker 5: was sixteen. That one I thought was the one.

482
00:23:25,119 --> 00:23:28,920
Speaker 4: You know, mom, I loved him the second one.

483
00:23:29,200 --> 00:23:31,680
Speaker 5: I knew immediately to be honest, and when I let

484
00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:34,159
Speaker 5: it go on a little bit too long because I

485
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:36,560
Speaker 5: can be a little hard headed too, but I was

486
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:39,840
Speaker 5: like this, this man is not going to be equally

487
00:23:39,880 --> 00:23:43,320
Speaker 5: yoked with me. And I was heavy on I didn't

488
00:23:43,320 --> 00:23:49,119
Speaker 5: want to teach someone about Jesus. Now that's not everybody's testimony,

489
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:51,360
Speaker 5: but I was like, I don't want to do that.

490
00:23:51,400 --> 00:23:52,840
Speaker 4: Lord, So you didn't.

491
00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:54,800
Speaker 2: Want to do you didn't want to do evangelism with

492
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:55,399
Speaker 2: your husband?

493
00:23:55,520 --> 00:23:59,359
Speaker 4: No everybody else? Yes, I got you.

494
00:23:59,560 --> 00:24:02,520
Speaker 2: So is that what attracted you to Gabriel over here?

495
00:24:02,600 --> 00:24:06,600
Speaker 3: Is because of not only is he ministering the gospel,

496
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:10,760
Speaker 3: but he actually enjoys the art of the gospel where

497
00:24:10,800 --> 00:24:12,840
Speaker 3: he's wrapping and all that. Was that something that you

498
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,840
Speaker 3: saw for yourself or it was just something that materialized

499
00:24:15,880 --> 00:24:16,240
Speaker 3: once you.

500
00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:18,800
Speaker 5: Met him, once we got to know each other and

501
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:24,960
Speaker 5: actually had real conversations. Yes, his responses weren't like the

502
00:24:25,000 --> 00:24:28,320
Speaker 5: typical male responses I've gotten in the past, and I

503
00:24:28,359 --> 00:24:33,879
Speaker 5: was like, oh, it's okay, it's different. So when you

504
00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 5: when you met him at church, did you remind him

505
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:38,200
Speaker 5: that you DMed him and that you guys had kind

506
00:24:38,200 --> 00:24:42,119
Speaker 5: of had that exchange. Yes, but I think he remembered

507
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:43,600
Speaker 5: that I d him.

508
00:24:43,680 --> 00:24:46,400
Speaker 1: I did afterwards. I had looked her up and I

509
00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:52,760
Speaker 1: was like, oh this home girl. Okay, no, she cool.

510
00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 2: Cool.

511
00:24:55,240 --> 00:24:57,760
Speaker 5: So then when you guys went to the lobby, what

512
00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:01,439
Speaker 5: was that exchange? Like, look on, I know, I know,

513
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:05,560
Speaker 5: but I'm saying you guys then became acquaintances. So how

514
00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:09,040
Speaker 5: did that? How did you get there? From that first interaction?

515
00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:09,960
Speaker 4: At you who called?

516
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 2: Who? Did you have a phone number?

517
00:25:11,760 --> 00:25:15,199
Speaker 1: It was you d ms like you see people like

518
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:17,280
Speaker 1: I would see her stories. She would travel or go

519
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 1: to a concert, and then you know, I like here

520
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:23,159
Speaker 1: or comment there. One thing that we kind of we

521
00:25:23,320 --> 00:25:26,320
Speaker 1: kind of circle started circle back to was that I'm

522
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,159
Speaker 1: a Delta Airline.

523
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:31,240
Speaker 4: Guy and I was I was spirit spirit and so.

524
00:25:31,560 --> 00:25:34,080
Speaker 1: We would go back and forth like she he posted

525
00:25:34,080 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 1: on the flight and the Spirit and I'd be and

526
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:38,400
Speaker 1: I'd be on Delta and I'm like, how could you ever.

527
00:25:40,480 --> 00:25:45,320
Speaker 4: Listen? Listen, spar will get you there, get you there.

528
00:25:46,359 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 1: You might land in a spirit.

529
00:25:49,560 --> 00:25:54,640
Speaker 4: Gonna take your spirit. But I'm a Delta girl. Now, Okay,

530
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:58,840
Speaker 4: So well before we get too far.

531
00:25:59,080 --> 00:26:01,600
Speaker 5: I was just one wondering, since we keep talking about

532
00:26:01,600 --> 00:26:04,159
Speaker 5: how good of a rapper you are, is there something

533
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,200
Speaker 5: that we could hear?

534
00:26:06,960 --> 00:26:07,000
Speaker 1: You?

535
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,080
Speaker 4: Just put something new out quick?

536
00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:15,000
Speaker 1: I just, I just I just released an album called Departure.

537
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:20,639
Speaker 1: It's on all uh platform streaming services. Uh what I

538
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 1: could do a little verse. Let's see, uh radical putting

539
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:29,479
Speaker 1: every demon on sabbatical battle through. When I mentioned Jesus,

540
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:32,200
Speaker 1: they get added to animals. All they eat is flesh.

541
00:26:32,200 --> 00:26:34,359
Speaker 1: They turn the cannibals. Give him holy spirit, but be

542
00:26:34,400 --> 00:26:37,560
Speaker 1: careful because he's flammable. Adding up, got too many blessings

543
00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:39,240
Speaker 1: home you add him up. We're just trying to tell

544
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:40,800
Speaker 1: you about the Savior. Why are you mad at us?

545
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:44,200
Speaker 1: New school freshmen? But they acting like they graduates, putting

546
00:26:44,200 --> 00:26:45,840
Speaker 1: all these lines into the air. That's why the cap

547
00:26:45,960 --> 00:26:49,240
Speaker 1: is up. Sheesh. I believe I believe they're asking me

548
00:26:49,280 --> 00:26:52,040
Speaker 1: how much I tell him Matthew seventeen. They got me

549
00:26:52,040 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 1: screaming mustard like, is Dejon on the beat?

550
00:26:54,800 --> 00:26:55,000
Speaker 2: Gay?

551
00:26:55,119 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: Please? It's not enough? Got to point him to the

552
00:26:57,680 --> 00:27:01,760
Speaker 1: king I seek. Yeah, So I.

553
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,439
Speaker 3: Need my nephew to listen to Yea because I'm been

554
00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:07,080
Speaker 3: trying to tell my nephew that you know, you can

555
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:09,960
Speaker 3: do music for the Lord and then it sound dope

556
00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:13,240
Speaker 3: instead of always trying to do the other.

557
00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:16,000
Speaker 2: So so I'm proud of your.

558
00:27:15,840 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 1: Young king than I tried to do the secular thing,

559
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:26,040
Speaker 1: but I'm I'm not from the streets. I tried to

560
00:27:26,119 --> 00:27:29,520
Speaker 1: rap about it, and I was like, yeah, you know,

561
00:27:29,640 --> 00:27:31,320
Speaker 1: I know about and I didn't know a thing.

562
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:35,920
Speaker 4: You know, we just had this compation.

563
00:27:36,200 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 1: I grew up on on a nicer side of town.

564
00:27:39,000 --> 00:27:43,159
Speaker 1: You know, I had friends, I had family. You know,

565
00:27:43,280 --> 00:27:45,600
Speaker 1: it was it was it was a blessing. I thank

566
00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,680
Speaker 1: God for it. And so it's like me trying to

567
00:27:48,760 --> 00:27:51,600
Speaker 1: rap about you know, I'm from the streets? Are you

568
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:55,280
Speaker 1: though you was from ah Street but not these streets?

569
00:27:55,560 --> 00:27:57,000
Speaker 1: But want to start wrap about Jesus?

570
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:01,640
Speaker 2: That's good? What was what were you wrapping about when

571
00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:02,560
Speaker 2: you're in the second world?

572
00:28:03,680 --> 00:28:06,800
Speaker 1: I tried to wrap about girls. Wasn't getting one. Uh

573
00:28:08,200 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 1: try to rap you know that. I'm I'm I'm hugged.

574
00:28:11,320 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 1: I got a hug, but I ain't.

575
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:15,000
Speaker 2: Killing people and stuff.

576
00:28:15,080 --> 00:28:16,679
Speaker 1: Oh man, tried. I tried.

577
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:18,200
Speaker 2: I tried.

578
00:28:18,560 --> 00:28:26,439
Speaker 1: I wasn't killing nothing, couldn't kill my flesh. It was

579
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:26,880
Speaker 1: not good.

580
00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:28,960
Speaker 3: So why do you think that is why do you

581
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:33,280
Speaker 3: think the why do you think the young men pursuing

582
00:28:33,400 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 3: rapping go that route to go to the secular world

583
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:39,400
Speaker 3: and start talking about that. Like my buddy d One

584
00:28:39,480 --> 00:28:43,280
Speaker 3: talks about that a lot, about how people are talking

585
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:46,160
Speaker 3: about killing another black man and shooting and ribbing and

586
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,000
Speaker 3: percoset and all this stuff, talking about being drugged up.

587
00:28:49,360 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 3: Why do you think because here it was you grew

588
00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:55,640
Speaker 3: up in church, right, what made you feel the need

589
00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:57,840
Speaker 3: to be drawn that way?

590
00:28:58,560 --> 00:29:01,000
Speaker 1: I just wanted to be accepted, just wanted to be

591
00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,400
Speaker 1: you know, a lot of the artists and things that

592
00:29:03,440 --> 00:29:05,640
Speaker 1: people look up to, especially men, they look up to

593
00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:08,280
Speaker 1: men who are rapping about these things, and so it's

594
00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:11,120
Speaker 1: easy to kind of want to go that route because

595
00:29:11,160 --> 00:29:15,320
Speaker 1: you want to be like them. But while I did

596
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:18,600
Speaker 1: like some secular artists, I did not want to be

597
00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:23,240
Speaker 1: like them. You know, I didn't want that life I wanted.

598
00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:27,000
Speaker 1: I wanted Gabriel's life. I didn't want to be to

599
00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:28,840
Speaker 1: have someone else's life. And I think a lot of

600
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:32,480
Speaker 1: young men they just want community. They just want community.

601
00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,800
Speaker 1: So you know that gang affiliation there, rapping from the

602
00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:39,080
Speaker 1: streets and you know, getting you know all the women

603
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:43,600
Speaker 1: that they can that lifestyle seems appealing to them, But

604
00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:48,920
Speaker 1: it's so much better to just be yourself because the

605
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:53,400
Speaker 1: thing about music and artistry, it's only ever great when

606
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:53,959
Speaker 1: you're honest.

607
00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:54,640
Speaker 2: That's true.

608
00:29:55,320 --> 00:29:58,959
Speaker 1: If you're not honest, everybody can tell exactly, everybody can

609
00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:02,160
Speaker 1: tell that, you know, you not really even if you

610
00:30:02,240 --> 00:30:04,480
Speaker 1: did come up from the streets and that is your life,

611
00:30:04,480 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 1: like people could tell, no, that's he really does live that.

612
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:12,400
Speaker 1: And so if you're not being honesty.

613
00:30:11,200 --> 00:30:13,480
Speaker 5: What do you say to this younger generation who says

614
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:15,680
Speaker 5: it doesn't matter. We know they didn't live that. We

615
00:30:15,840 --> 00:30:16,719
Speaker 5: just like the music.

616
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:19,000
Speaker 4: We're just saying and repeating what they're saying.

617
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 1: Well, be careful what you eat. Be careful what you eat.

618
00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:26,719
Speaker 1: You know you can I can like ice cream. I

619
00:30:26,760 --> 00:30:28,840
Speaker 1: can't have ice cream all the time.

620
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:29,800
Speaker 2: You know.

621
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:33,240
Speaker 1: I can appreciate that, but I can't have I can't

622
00:30:33,240 --> 00:30:36,520
Speaker 1: continually feed myself that because eventually I'm going to get

623
00:30:36,560 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 1: unwell and then you're just walking around sick. And that's

624
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: what happens to a lot of young men, is they

625
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 1: they walking around sick because they're continually feeding themselves sinful things,

626
00:30:47,160 --> 00:30:51,360
Speaker 1: sinful desires, and you cannot live like that good.

627
00:30:52,240 --> 00:30:54,320
Speaker 5: But when I put out I'm just playing because this

628
00:30:54,480 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 5: is what they say. They tell me, they say, well,

629
00:30:56,480 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 5: when I put out the good music, I don't get

630
00:30:58,680 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 5: any streams. When I put out the music that doesn't

631
00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:05,280
Speaker 5: have the cussing or I don't do the you know,

632
00:31:05,320 --> 00:31:08,280
Speaker 5: the stuff about the women, nobody cares. But the moment

633
00:31:08,360 --> 00:31:10,720
Speaker 5: I dropped that, you know, over a beat and I'm

634
00:31:11,120 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 5: saying all kinds of words, then yeah, I'm getting views.

635
00:31:14,400 --> 00:31:17,200
Speaker 5: I'm making money, And then I see that they're making money.

636
00:31:17,360 --> 00:31:18,280
Speaker 4: That's what I want to be.

637
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:21,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, I understand how that can be appealing, like the money,

638
00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 1: but let's be honest, brother, you're not You're not making

639
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:27,720
Speaker 1: that much money for strange You're getting points zero zero

640
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:32,320
Speaker 1: one percent. Yeah, and it's not worth losing your soul over,

641
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:35,160
Speaker 1: or it's not worth losing your sanity over.

642
00:31:35,240 --> 00:31:35,760
Speaker 2: Yeah.

643
00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 1: Like, even if you do do that and you get

644
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:41,280
Speaker 1: all this money and things like that, you will still

645
00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:42,440
Speaker 1: be unhappy.

646
00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:44,520
Speaker 2: We're profits a man to gain the whole world and

647
00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:48,840
Speaker 2: lose it. So that's facts. Huh, that's good. That's good.

648
00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 3: Thank you for getting them to spit high sixteen So listen,

649
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:55,480
Speaker 3: So here it is, so y'all meeting the lobby.

650
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:59,040
Speaker 2: How did y'all stay connected? And how long? Well I'm

651
00:31:59,080 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 2: gonna start there. Hot, y'all stay connected?

652
00:32:02,360 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 5: I say, yeah, all right, tag me in. So yes,

653
00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:09,600
Speaker 5: DMS was the main way. The next time I saw

654
00:32:09,680 --> 00:32:14,360
Speaker 5: him was actually at with the Perrys Live podcast. You know,

655
00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 5: he didn't want to go. His friend invited him, but

656
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:21,360
Speaker 5: he was like against everything. He went anyway, and then

657
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:24,720
Speaker 5: during the intermission they're like, oh, if you single, raise

658
00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 5: your hand. Obviously I said eh, And then I walked

659
00:32:28,440 --> 00:32:30,680
Speaker 5: out and I saw him standing there and I was like,

660
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:34,120
Speaker 5: oh hey, and I was like, fancy me and you here.

661
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:37,800
Speaker 5: And if you recall the last time we first met,

662
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:40,880
Speaker 5: I was with my friend. The first thing he said

663
00:32:40,880 --> 00:32:43,120
Speaker 5: to me at the with the Perrys was oh, hey,

664
00:32:43,160 --> 00:32:44,480
Speaker 5: where's your friend at?

665
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:50,360
Speaker 4: And I said okay, and I was like she's.

666
00:32:50,200 --> 00:32:55,200
Speaker 5: Not here, but I'm gonna go ahead and pay it

667
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 5: back in you.

668
00:32:56,200 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 1: Know, I'm not great. I'm not great as small talk.

669
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:06,480
Speaker 1: So I was nervous. As she said I didn't want

670
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:10,880
Speaker 1: to go. I was doing another event and I just

671
00:33:10,880 --> 00:33:13,680
Speaker 1: felt this unction to go. I'm like, okay, I'll go

672
00:33:13,760 --> 00:33:16,240
Speaker 1: see with the Perrys and so I get there and

673
00:33:16,280 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 1: I'm chilling these to raise your hands. You're single, I'm like,

674
00:33:18,840 --> 00:33:24,480
Speaker 1: I'm single, but please guys guys. And it was intermission,

675
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:26,880
Speaker 1: as she said, I saw her in the lobby, and

676
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:31,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh no, I don't know how to react.

677
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:33,360
Speaker 2: Was you happy when you saw I did?

678
00:33:33,400 --> 00:33:35,120
Speaker 1: I was happy that I saw her, and then she

679
00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 1: was again looking gorgeous, and so you know, I get

680
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: nervous around beautiful woman. But and so she came over

681
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:45,880
Speaker 1: and I'm like, first thing I said is where's your friend?

682
00:33:46,120 --> 00:33:49,280
Speaker 2: I couldn't come. So you thought that he was interested

683
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:49,760
Speaker 2: in your friend?

684
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:52,640
Speaker 5: Yeah, And honestly, I'm quick to be like, if you're

685
00:33:52,640 --> 00:33:54,480
Speaker 5: not interested in me, are cool, I'm out.

686
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna waste my time.

687
00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:58,720
Speaker 5: So I was like, okay, I'm gonna shoot her text

688
00:33:58,760 --> 00:34:01,000
Speaker 5: then let her know old boy, it's interesting.

689
00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:02,240
Speaker 4: He asked about.

690
00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:06,120
Speaker 1: Wait what, I did not know that you was going

691
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:07,960
Speaker 1: to pass me out and you.

692
00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:20,160
Speaker 5: Want So I was like, I asked her, and she's like,

693
00:34:20,200 --> 00:34:24,160
Speaker 5: oh girl, ain't no way anyway. But then I just

694
00:34:24,239 --> 00:34:29,360
Speaker 5: you know, he was asking about it, and again.

695
00:34:29,200 --> 00:34:31,920
Speaker 4: He was not looking at me. He was just like

696
00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 4: I didn't catch that thought. But after me and my

697
00:34:41,200 --> 00:34:41,880
Speaker 4: friends walked out.

698
00:34:41,920 --> 00:34:44,640
Speaker 5: We all drove separately, and the line to get there's

699
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:46,840
Speaker 5: only one exit ole of that venue, so the line

700
00:34:46,840 --> 00:34:49,439
Speaker 5: to get out took an hour. And I was like damn.

701
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:51,719
Speaker 5: I was like lookey and said where he at? I

702
00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:54,279
Speaker 5: could just chat with him until the line goes down.

703
00:34:55,000 --> 00:34:58,560
Speaker 4: He left early. He wasn't he was in the spirit

704
00:34:58,600 --> 00:35:02,000
Speaker 4: because the Lord told him leave. Yeah, he didn't listen.

705
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:07,680
Speaker 1: So yeah, I after intermission, I go back in. You know,

706
00:35:07,719 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: I'm listening to the podcast. I'm like, all right, I'm tired.

707
00:35:09,760 --> 00:35:11,799
Speaker 1: It's getting late. I want to get out of here

708
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:14,440
Speaker 1: before this traffic. I'm walking out. I walk outside of

709
00:35:14,480 --> 00:35:16,560
Speaker 1: the venue, walking to my car. I feel the spirit

710
00:35:16,680 --> 00:35:23,000
Speaker 1: so strongly, Gabe, do not leave. I'm tired.

711
00:35:23,040 --> 00:35:23,960
Speaker 2: I want to go home.

712
00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:27,560
Speaker 1: Lord, I'm Gabe, do not leave.

713
00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:28,120
Speaker 6: All right?

714
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:28,879
Speaker 2: All right?

715
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:30,560
Speaker 1: So I go back in. I'm like, okay, what you

716
00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:32,920
Speaker 1: guy me in here for. I think he just wants

717
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,319
Speaker 1: me to hear the rest of the podcast here. You know,

718
00:35:35,320 --> 00:35:37,520
Speaker 1: I'm talking about how he met Philip Manthey, Mitchwell those things.

719
00:35:37,560 --> 00:35:40,080
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, oh, you know, that's good testimony. I'm like,

720
00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:43,440
Speaker 1: all right, I'm I'm leaving for sure. Now walk out again,

721
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 1: walk into my car, Gabe, do not leave. I didn't listen.

722
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,040
Speaker 1: I got in that car, drove off, and I later

723
00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:57,560
Speaker 1: found out she was waiting around for an hour, you know,

724
00:35:57,920 --> 00:36:00,080
Speaker 1: looking for me, because she had to sit there. So

725
00:36:00,160 --> 00:36:02,080
Speaker 1: that could have been time be able to chop it up,

726
00:36:02,120 --> 00:36:03,759
Speaker 1: to chop it up and get to know each other.

727
00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:05,920
Speaker 1: Maybe we would have jump started this a little earlier.

728
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:11,840
Speaker 1: So be obedient, guys, be obedient. When was that?

729
00:36:11,840 --> 00:36:14,759
Speaker 4: That was? That was a year later, a year after

730
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:15,240
Speaker 4: I first.

731
00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:17,200
Speaker 2: So give us time. What month and years is?

732
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:24,080
Speaker 1: That was July twenty four, twenty twenty four, four twenty

733
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:24,480
Speaker 1: twenty four?

734
00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:27,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, so July twenty twenty four. Then what happened?

735
00:36:28,280 --> 00:36:30,640
Speaker 4: Then you get to twenty twenty five.

736
00:36:31,200 --> 00:36:32,640
Speaker 2: Y'all talk y'alln't talk?

737
00:36:33,040 --> 00:36:34,200
Speaker 4: Well, we talked little between.

738
00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 2: Yes, you have exchange phone numbs at all at this point?

739
00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:42,719
Speaker 1: No, well I did. So I found I found out

740
00:36:42,800 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 1: that she was a baker, and I found out that

741
00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:49,880
Speaker 1: she was vegan. She's a vegan baker. I'm like, okay,

742
00:36:49,960 --> 00:36:53,800
Speaker 1: I love cookies. Now, I had never tried vegan cookies before,

743
00:36:54,160 --> 00:36:57,200
Speaker 1: so you know, she was running her business, and I said,

744
00:36:57,200 --> 00:37:04,719
Speaker 1: I'd like to buy two cookies. So two cookies. I

745
00:37:04,719 --> 00:37:09,960
Speaker 1: didn't know cookies. I didn't I had never tried vegan cookies.

746
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:11,320
Speaker 4: Give her a shot.

747
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:14,040
Speaker 5: I want me to see if usually I do a

748
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:17,000
Speaker 5: minimum of like thirty five. At the time, it was

749
00:37:17,040 --> 00:37:19,440
Speaker 5: thirty five dollars. So I was like, I make the exception,

750
00:37:19,800 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 5: you know, made him.

751
00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:21,600
Speaker 2: Two cookies for thirty five.

752
00:37:22,000 --> 00:37:26,520
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, right, So she wanted me to meet her,

753
00:37:26,560 --> 00:37:28,960
Speaker 1: and I drove. I saw all I looked at the

754
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:31,839
Speaker 1: map and saw was Detroit. I live at the time.

755
00:37:32,200 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 1: I live in Rochester and she lives in Bellehille. There're

756
00:37:36,160 --> 00:37:38,880
Speaker 1: hour and some change a part. So I'm just driving.

757
00:37:38,960 --> 00:37:40,240
Speaker 4: I'm for two cookies.

758
00:37:40,760 --> 00:37:44,279
Speaker 1: Minutes go by, I'm like, where is this person at?

759
00:37:44,520 --> 00:37:47,600
Speaker 1: I drove all the way to her house for two cookies.

760
00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:53,400
Speaker 1: They was good. They was good. Clearly it was worth it.

761
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:55,680
Speaker 5: And look, he ate him before he left my driveway

762
00:37:56,080 --> 00:37:58,279
Speaker 5: because my mom. Me and my mom were watching out

763
00:37:58,280 --> 00:38:01,360
Speaker 5: the window and she's like, girl, he ate those.

764
00:38:01,200 --> 00:38:02,160
Speaker 1: Peoples watching me.

765
00:38:02,320 --> 00:38:07,759
Speaker 4: I'm learning so much, I'm remembering everything. I never have

766
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:08,800
Speaker 4: to tell the full story.

767
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:15,359
Speaker 1: You know, somebodyies cookies, hate them. Two cookies, So more?

768
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:16,560
Speaker 4: Did you wish you would have got more?

769
00:38:16,600 --> 00:38:16,799
Speaker 2: I did?

770
00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 1: Next time I got I got six.

771
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:22,480
Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, but he had my number from that, but

772
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 5: he never used it to personally text me.

773
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:27,160
Speaker 4: So it was just professional.

774
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:29,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you was moving like that. You was just

775
00:38:29,840 --> 00:38:31,040
Speaker 2: trying to keep a professional I.

776
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:33,120
Speaker 1: Was trying to keep professional because I didn't want her

777
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:37,279
Speaker 1: to think that I'm you know, I'm just trying to

778
00:38:37,280 --> 00:38:39,640
Speaker 1: get her number, trying to get with her because I

779
00:38:40,440 --> 00:38:43,640
Speaker 1: was attracted to her. But I was trying to be

780
00:38:43,680 --> 00:38:44,920
Speaker 1: on the on the straight and narrow.

781
00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:47,640
Speaker 5: And I did tell him later when we got together

782
00:38:47,680 --> 00:38:50,360
Speaker 5: that when he came to pick up the cookies, you

783
00:38:50,360 --> 00:38:52,720
Speaker 5: know usually when people come to pick up their orders,

784
00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:56,440
Speaker 5: I'm like, I don't I'm still covered in flower and everything.

785
00:38:58,400 --> 00:39:00,400
Speaker 4: And I opened the door. He's like, oh thanks, it

786
00:39:00,480 --> 00:39:00,880
Speaker 4: takes it, and.

787
00:39:01,160 --> 00:39:06,399
Speaker 1: Like stop, yeah, I made a lot of Gabriel, that's

788
00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:07,480
Speaker 1: all right.

789
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:09,640
Speaker 2: Thank you.

790
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:12,080
Speaker 1: I was about to miss my blessing a lot of times.

791
00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:13,200
Speaker 3: Yeah.

792
00:39:13,760 --> 00:39:14,359
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.

793
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 1: So that in between there, that was our interactions and

794
00:39:17,200 --> 00:39:18,719
Speaker 1: still doing What did you think?

795
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:20,560
Speaker 2: So what did you think when you grabbed the cookies?

796
00:39:20,880 --> 00:39:22,120
Speaker 2: Did you even notice it at all?

797
00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:25,320
Speaker 1: I noticed her. I was like, oh, man, she's pretty

798
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:30,000
Speaker 1: the cookies. Yeah, I just walked off, because again I'm nervous.

799
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:32,480
Speaker 1: I'm not go with small talk. I don't know how

800
00:39:32,520 --> 00:39:36,279
Speaker 1: to like and transition and be like, oh thanks, thanks

801
00:39:36,280 --> 00:39:37,520
Speaker 1: for the cookies. You know you're looking.

802
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 5: So as you were driving there by the cookies, cookies

803
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:42,040
Speaker 5: transition that.

804
00:39:46,360 --> 00:39:50,960
Speaker 2: You make that transition me in the bush giving.

805
00:39:50,800 --> 00:40:00,160
Speaker 4: Them somebody in his ear, Gabriel, now listen. But as

806
00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:02,720
Speaker 4: you were driving there, what were you thinking?

807
00:40:04,480 --> 00:40:07,279
Speaker 1: I was thinking, man, am I crazy for driving an

808
00:40:07,320 --> 00:40:10,400
Speaker 1: hour to get two cookies? But from this this young lady,

809
00:40:10,880 --> 00:40:13,040
Speaker 1: I hope she don't think I'm doing too much. That

810
00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:15,000
Speaker 1: was really what I was worried about.

811
00:40:14,680 --> 00:40:17,520
Speaker 4: I didn't know how far away he lived.

812
00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:20,440
Speaker 5: Okay, okay, And my mom told me after, she's where

813
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:21,239
Speaker 5: are you driving from?

814
00:40:21,360 --> 00:40:21,880
Speaker 4: I said, I don't know.

815
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:27,560
Speaker 5: Rochester Hills, Adrian, I said, I said, what you let

816
00:40:27,600 --> 00:40:29,000
Speaker 5: that boil and get two cookies?

817
00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:31,480
Speaker 4: And he drove all the way out here. I was like, well,

818
00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:32,279
Speaker 4: how far can it be?

819
00:40:32,520 --> 00:40:35,400
Speaker 5: I was thinking of Farmington Hills, which is like twenty

820
00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 5: thirty minutes.

821
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:39,360
Speaker 4: Oh, And I was like, ooh, he'll come back. It's fine.

822
00:40:39,719 --> 00:40:41,960
Speaker 1: I did come back. He did come I did come back,

823
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:44,920
Speaker 1: but yeah, so that was kind of our interaction. And

824
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:50,000
Speaker 1: then we get to twenty twenty five February. My cousins

825
00:40:50,000 --> 00:40:52,919
Speaker 1: said they want to go see Force Frank. I say, okay, cool, Yeah,

826
00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:55,680
Speaker 1: I think I'll go. I had saw from her stories

827
00:40:55,800 --> 00:40:58,320
Speaker 1: that she had saw him before, and so I wanted

828
00:40:58,320 --> 00:41:00,520
Speaker 1: to DM or ask her, hey, how is this? You

829
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:03,680
Speaker 1: know this, that and the other, and she says that

830
00:41:04,040 --> 00:41:06,279
Speaker 1: it's really good and that she was thinking about going

831
00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:11,799
Speaker 1: this time, but it was in Grand Rappids, which from

832
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:13,760
Speaker 1: Detroit to Grand Rapids is like two and a half hours,

833
00:41:13,760 --> 00:41:17,400
Speaker 1: so she said she doesn't really want to drive, and

834
00:41:17,440 --> 00:41:20,000
Speaker 1: her dad, you know, really doesn't want to drive that far.

835
00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:22,759
Speaker 1: So I'm like, you know, I guess I'll be a

836
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:26,359
Speaker 1: gentleman and offer assistance.

837
00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:29,720
Speaker 2: Listen, I'll be your uber, be your uber.

838
00:41:29,920 --> 00:41:33,840
Speaker 1: You don't have to make that. I'll take on that burden.

839
00:41:33,520 --> 00:41:36,960
Speaker 2: For you, and you get two and a half hours

840
00:41:37,000 --> 00:41:38,440
Speaker 2: of undivided attention.

841
00:41:38,600 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 1: Undivided attention. So I said, hey, you know, if you

842
00:41:42,239 --> 00:41:45,279
Speaker 1: want to go, you can ride with me, and she

843
00:41:46,040 --> 00:41:49,040
Speaker 1: was trying very hard to make it seem like she

844
00:41:49,040 --> 00:41:50,040
Speaker 1: didn't want me to do that.

845
00:41:50,719 --> 00:41:52,160
Speaker 2: Well, you ain't got to do that.

846
00:41:53,840 --> 00:41:54,360
Speaker 1: You got to.

847
00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:55,520
Speaker 4: I mean, I wasn't mad.

848
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:57,440
Speaker 5: I don't like driving, so I was mad at it,

849
00:41:57,560 --> 00:41:59,920
Speaker 5: but I was like, I also don't know him like that,

850
00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:02,440
Speaker 5: and I was like, it was being in a car

851
00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:06,319
Speaker 5: somebody I don't really know, four hours like there and.

852
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:09,000
Speaker 4: Back, I don't know.

853
00:42:09,120 --> 00:42:12,120
Speaker 5: But he suggested that, well we talked that whole month

854
00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 5: was from February to March thirty first.

855
00:42:16,080 --> 00:42:19,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, March thirty first, the concert. It's her birthday,

856
00:42:19,640 --> 00:42:20,319
Speaker 2: March thirty first.

857
00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:21,680
Speaker 4: Oh that's special.

858
00:42:21,920 --> 00:42:25,000
Speaker 5: Yes, And so he was like, you know, let's well

859
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:29,560
Speaker 5: tell him how you know. Now he finally catching up, okay,

860
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:31,360
Speaker 5: and he I guess.

861
00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:32,120
Speaker 4: You is shot.

862
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:35,840
Speaker 1: Yeah. So we we established like, well, it's gonna be

863
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:37,480
Speaker 1: awkward if we're just sitting in a car for two

864
00:42:37,520 --> 00:42:40,319
Speaker 1: and that four hours. You know, we don't know each other.

865
00:42:40,400 --> 00:42:44,880
Speaker 1: So from that day we talked every single day. And

866
00:42:44,920 --> 00:42:48,760
Speaker 1: this is February to what February of eighteenth, eighteenth eighteenth

867
00:42:48,880 --> 00:42:52,120
Speaker 1: is when it started, and so we're talking every single day.

868
00:42:52,360 --> 00:42:55,359
Speaker 4: And I would say one quick thing.

869
00:42:55,960 --> 00:42:58,399
Speaker 5: The first day we chatted, he was like, until next time,

870
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:02,280
Speaker 5: and then like that's how he signed off our conversation

871
00:43:02,320 --> 00:43:03,680
Speaker 5: and in my mind I said, all, I bet I'll

872
00:43:03,680 --> 00:43:06,080
Speaker 5: probably talked to him two days later the next morning,

873
00:43:06,239 --> 00:43:09,080
Speaker 5: bright and early, good morning.

874
00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:09,879
Speaker 1: It was next time.

875
00:43:10,239 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 5: I was like, oh, I was just not expecting him,

876
00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:14,440
Speaker 5: just based off of our past.

877
00:43:14,680 --> 00:43:16,920
Speaker 1: This is at It's one of the other ways I

878
00:43:16,960 --> 00:43:19,400
Speaker 1: see the Lord at work now that we're talking about it,

879
00:43:19,560 --> 00:43:21,680
Speaker 1: because I would have never done that before.

880
00:43:22,280 --> 00:43:24,640
Speaker 2: But which part done? Which?

881
00:43:24,719 --> 00:43:28,160
Speaker 1: Park responding like the very next day, really, I would have,

882
00:43:28,520 --> 00:43:30,279
Speaker 1: you know, give it a little time to miss me

883
00:43:30,320 --> 00:43:30,799
Speaker 1: a little bit.

884
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,200
Speaker 3: So ask this because I want you to unpack this

885
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:37,080
Speaker 3: because a lot of guys think like that. And the

886
00:43:37,120 --> 00:43:39,839
Speaker 3: way I always thought is why you're trying to give

887
00:43:39,880 --> 00:43:43,040
Speaker 3: her time. This is my mindset. While you're trying to

888
00:43:43,080 --> 00:43:45,759
Speaker 3: give her time to miss you, you're providing an opportunity

889
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 3: for another guy to slide in and take your place.

890
00:43:48,320 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 2: So I'm I'm a hunter. So it's like at the

891
00:43:50,680 --> 00:43:53,000
Speaker 2: end of the day, I'm like, hey, Like even.

892
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:55,440
Speaker 3: When I asked Ashley on our first date, and this

893
00:43:55,480 --> 00:43:57,719
Speaker 3: is we were friends at this time for about a

894
00:43:57,840 --> 00:44:00,920
Speaker 3: year and four months, while you're at three at this point,

895
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:02,920
Speaker 3: and I said, I would like to take you on

896
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:03,319
Speaker 3: a date.

897
00:44:03,840 --> 00:44:04,920
Speaker 2: Every time I come to la.

898
00:44:05,080 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 3: We meet up with this platonic but now I want

899
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 3: to be extremely intentional. This was in the February of

900
00:44:11,280 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 3: last year, twenty twenty five. I said, when can I

901
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,920
Speaker 3: take you out? She says, March the eighteenth. And when

902
00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:19,880
Speaker 3: she said that, though I booked my flight on Delta,

903
00:44:19,920 --> 00:44:23,160
Speaker 3: by the way, book on Delta to go to go

904
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:28,799
Speaker 3: see her, I was like, that's eighteen days and anything, yes,

905
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:31,640
Speaker 3: because I always say anything can change in that moment,

906
00:44:32,040 --> 00:44:36,000
Speaker 3: and I'm already trying to transition her from friendship to

907
00:44:36,360 --> 00:44:38,400
Speaker 3: I always say, let's go from friend to fiance, So

908
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:40,839
Speaker 3: I'm trying to transition her from that and for her

909
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:43,760
Speaker 3: to see me outside of this, because that's what I said.

910
00:44:43,560 --> 00:44:44,160
Speaker 2: In the conversation.

911
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:46,160
Speaker 3: I said, I want you to give him the opportunity

912
00:44:46,640 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 3: to so we can see each other outside of just platonic.

913
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:52,480
Speaker 3: Let's let's try for this. So that's how I shot

914
00:44:52,520 --> 00:44:55,200
Speaker 3: my shot. But then waiting up to March the eighteenth,

915
00:44:55,280 --> 00:44:57,239
Speaker 3: it was like, hey, this is this is some time

916
00:44:57,719 --> 00:44:59,480
Speaker 3: and it was just a date. So at the end

917
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:01,239
Speaker 3: of the day, you can still date whoever she wanted

918
00:45:01,239 --> 00:45:02,960
Speaker 3: to date. I can still date who I want to date.

919
00:45:03,040 --> 00:45:04,520
Speaker 3: But it was still the fact that it was so

920
00:45:04,800 --> 00:45:06,960
Speaker 3: I felt like it was so long. So I did

921
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:10,040
Speaker 3: exactly what you did. Talk to her every single day,

922
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:12,520
Speaker 3: several times a day.

923
00:45:12,440 --> 00:45:14,640
Speaker 2: Yes, hours a day. Yes.

924
00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:16,840
Speaker 3: I said, are you gonna if you go out with

925
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:20,160
Speaker 3: somebody else, you're gonna feel guilty because you have talked

926
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:21,560
Speaker 3: to me on the way to go see him?

927
00:45:21,600 --> 00:45:24,560
Speaker 1: Come on, come on, doc, That's what I believe.

928
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:26,040
Speaker 2: So at the end of the day, I just want

929
00:45:26,120 --> 00:45:30,040
Speaker 2: to make my presence known. Yeah. Period, And he did. Yeah, man.

930
00:45:30,080 --> 00:45:32,400
Speaker 3: And so my thing to you is why did Because

931
00:45:32,400 --> 00:45:34,480
Speaker 3: I want to talk to that brother out there that says,

932
00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:38,080
Speaker 3: you know, they go get a girl phone number and

933
00:45:38,120 --> 00:45:40,440
Speaker 3: then they leave the spot that they met him at.

934
00:45:40,719 --> 00:45:42,440
Speaker 2: I'm gonna wait about three days and talk to him.

935
00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 2: Where does that come from?

936
00:45:44,480 --> 00:45:46,560
Speaker 3: Has somebody told you that you should give a woman

937
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:48,560
Speaker 3: you shouldn't act to quote unquote thirsty?

938
00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:50,880
Speaker 2: They call that thirsty or or what is that?

939
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:52,520
Speaker 3: And then I want the women to chime in on

940
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:55,040
Speaker 3: how they perceived that when a guy waits that long.

941
00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:58,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, for me, it's just from being like, like I

942
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,640
Speaker 1: talked with earlier community people you around, They're like, you know,

943
00:46:01,719 --> 00:46:04,560
Speaker 1: you don't you don't don't want to sing thirsty. You

944
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 1: don't want to sing thirsty. And I'm like at that point,

945
00:46:07,719 --> 00:46:13,640
Speaker 1: I'm like, wait a second, but I am thirsty. I'm

946
00:46:13,920 --> 00:46:19,560
Speaker 1: very parched. I'm very thirsty. And I felt the think

947
00:46:19,600 --> 00:46:23,920
Speaker 1: about what she was doing is that she was open

948
00:46:24,520 --> 00:46:28,160
Speaker 1: mm hmm. She maybe feel comfortable enough to come at

949
00:46:28,160 --> 00:46:30,640
Speaker 1: her the very next day and the day after that

950
00:46:30,719 --> 00:46:32,360
Speaker 1: and the day after that. She could have, you know,

951
00:46:32,440 --> 00:46:35,680
Speaker 1: shut me down. She could have you know, not presented

952
00:46:35,680 --> 00:46:38,480
Speaker 1: herself in a way that she wants to be pursued.

953
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:41,080
Speaker 1: But because she presented herself in a way that she

954
00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:44,280
Speaker 1: wanted to be pursued, now I feel comfortable enough. Okay,

955
00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:47,640
Speaker 1: Well I'm if you're comfortable being pursued, I'm going to

956
00:46:47,680 --> 00:46:52,160
Speaker 1: pursue you. Fact, I'm going to come every single day

957
00:46:52,600 --> 00:46:55,520
Speaker 1: until you tell me that you no longer want to

958
00:46:55,520 --> 00:46:56,000
Speaker 1: be pursued.

959
00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:59,640
Speaker 3: So before you say that, now and ask you what

960
00:46:59,760 --> 00:47:02,640
Speaker 3: do you think when you give your number to a

961
00:47:02,680 --> 00:47:06,080
Speaker 3: guy and he may take two or three days to hit.

962
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:07,280
Speaker 4: You up, he's not interested?

963
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:09,640
Speaker 2: And what do you think asking when that happens.

964
00:47:09,920 --> 00:47:12,360
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's not that interested. I mean he's interested, but

965
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:15,200
Speaker 5: he's not that interested. And took me I wanted somebody

966
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:15,759
Speaker 5: to pursue me.

967
00:47:16,040 --> 00:47:19,080
Speaker 2: So and so what's the what's the what's the sweet spot?

968
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 4: Honestly like with him about question.

969
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:26,560
Speaker 3: Guy gets your phone number, when do you expect to

970
00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:31,200
Speaker 3: hear from him? He gets your phone number today at noon,

971
00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:32,640
Speaker 3: when do you expect.

972
00:47:32,280 --> 00:47:34,520
Speaker 4: To hear from same day?

973
00:47:34,640 --> 00:47:37,879
Speaker 5: Within Like, say, if it depending on the setting. Two,

974
00:47:38,360 --> 00:47:39,840
Speaker 5: if I know, if we meet like in a grocery

975
00:47:39,840 --> 00:47:42,320
Speaker 5: store or something, I'm like, okay, he probably got some errands.

976
00:47:42,840 --> 00:47:45,439
Speaker 5: I'll expect it by like three four, but same day,

977
00:47:45,880 --> 00:47:52,600
Speaker 5: and if he's really interested, thirty minutes, I just want

978
00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 5: to make sure this phone number works or like some

979
00:47:55,920 --> 00:47:58,000
Speaker 5: sometimes like right in front of me, make sure it's

980
00:47:58,040 --> 00:47:58,680
Speaker 5: a real number.

981
00:47:58,680 --> 00:48:01,200
Speaker 4: There what a note? Yeah, So I'm not leaving here

982
00:48:01,239 --> 00:48:02,600
Speaker 4: to like your phone.

983
00:48:04,600 --> 00:48:06,440
Speaker 1: So when you expect well.

984
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:09,319
Speaker 5: I'm just I'm just agreeing that it's really interested, Like

985
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:12,080
Speaker 5: they'll call you right there, right on the spot.

986
00:48:12,160 --> 00:48:14,440
Speaker 2: And my theory was, it's like, why you're leaving.

987
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:17,680
Speaker 3: So if if you at the store and get ready

988
00:48:17,719 --> 00:48:19,600
Speaker 3: to leave, whatever, if you have an event or whatever,

989
00:48:19,640 --> 00:48:21,239
Speaker 3: and y'all leave at the same time, I'm gonna call you,

990
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:22,680
Speaker 3: talk to you on the way home. You know what

991
00:48:22,680 --> 00:48:24,800
Speaker 3: I'm saying, so I can make sure you get home safely,

992
00:48:24,920 --> 00:48:26,480
Speaker 3: I can talk to you and you can know that

993
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:29,400
Speaker 3: I'm intentional at that point or whatnot. And so I

994
00:48:29,520 --> 00:48:32,480
Speaker 3: just always wonder that, and I try to teach my

995
00:48:32,719 --> 00:48:36,840
Speaker 3: nephew son this is that show intentionality doesn't mean.

996
00:48:36,719 --> 00:48:37,719
Speaker 2: Every woman is your wife.

997
00:48:37,800 --> 00:48:39,759
Speaker 3: You gotta be like this is the one, but show

998
00:48:39,880 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 3: that you're actually concerned about her, and concern can go

999
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:45,600
Speaker 3: a long way instead of just be like, I'll hit

1000
00:48:45,680 --> 00:48:47,879
Speaker 3: up about three days up about you know, I don't

1001
00:48:47,880 --> 00:48:50,000
Speaker 3: want to seem like this. And it's like another dude,

1002
00:48:50,040 --> 00:48:52,640
Speaker 3: some dude that she don't want, is putting on a court,

1003
00:48:53,320 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 3: a full court press on it.

1004
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:55,239
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.

1005
00:48:55,320 --> 00:48:57,319
Speaker 3: He like, I want to She's like, why he keeps

1006
00:48:57,680 --> 00:48:59,719
Speaker 3: I wish the guy really won't can hit me up

1007
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:02,439
Speaker 3: like this, God knows it's pressing me hard.

1008
00:49:02,480 --> 00:49:05,040
Speaker 5: To be honest, three days feels a little lazy, Yeah,

1009
00:49:05,080 --> 00:49:05,920
Speaker 5: it's a little lazy.

1010
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:06,400
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1011
00:49:06,560 --> 00:49:08,719
Speaker 3: And then you have to tell yourself every day I

1012
00:49:08,760 --> 00:49:10,839
Speaker 3: want to call her, but I'm not. And now you're

1013
00:49:10,840 --> 00:49:14,399
Speaker 3: fighting yourself. You're fighting the spirit man of you that's

1014
00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:16,560
Speaker 3: drawn you to this person, you know.

1015
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:19,480
Speaker 2: So yeah, that's just what. That's a good PSA to

1016
00:49:19,560 --> 00:49:22,799
Speaker 2: men to say, be thirsty, be parts funny enough.

1017
00:49:22,920 --> 00:49:25,680
Speaker 1: I did try to do that one day. I say,

1018
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:28,680
Speaker 1: you know what, I don't want to be doing too much,

1019
00:49:28,719 --> 00:49:31,279
Speaker 1: so I'm not going to text her today. Wow. I

1020
00:49:31,320 --> 00:49:32,480
Speaker 1: was like, I'm not going to call her. I'm not

1021
00:49:32,480 --> 00:49:35,160
Speaker 1: going to text her today. I didn't make it. It

1022
00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:37,840
Speaker 1: was about what maybe five or six, No, it was

1023
00:49:37,880 --> 00:49:41,680
Speaker 1: like seven. And I'm like, hey, you know, just check

1024
00:49:41,760 --> 00:49:43,919
Speaker 1: it on you. And she's like, why didn't you talk

1025
00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:46,200
Speaker 1: to me all day? I was like, oh, you know,

1026
00:49:46,280 --> 00:49:48,399
Speaker 1: I thought you was working. I ain't want to bother you.

1027
00:49:48,600 --> 00:49:49,960
Speaker 1: And he was like, well, I'm going to bed now.

1028
00:49:50,560 --> 00:49:54,640
Speaker 5: Yeah. I said, I'm sleeping. Yeah, it's late.

1029
00:49:54,960 --> 00:49:55,480
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1030
00:49:55,880 --> 00:49:57,600
Speaker 5: And I like made a rules like I'm not talking

1031
00:49:57,640 --> 00:49:59,759
Speaker 5: to I don't talk to men after a certain time.

1032
00:50:00,040 --> 00:50:02,560
Speaker 5: Said what time do you have nine o'clock eight five

1033
00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:05,640
Speaker 5: eight five five on the on the dot?

1034
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:06,560
Speaker 2: Why?

1035
00:50:07,400 --> 00:50:11,120
Speaker 5: Because I feel like, to me, the five is necessary,

1036
00:50:12,960 --> 00:50:16,840
Speaker 5: Like you know, if you said something for like stray

1037
00:50:16,920 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 5: on the dot, you're like, dang, one more minute, but

1038
00:50:19,160 --> 00:50:22,480
Speaker 5: you got that five extra minutes grace, you know, oh it's.

1039
00:50:22,400 --> 00:50:23,719
Speaker 2: Eight the number of grace.

1040
00:50:23,880 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 4: Yeah, period of grace. Yeah, five minute grace period. I

1041
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:30,360
Speaker 4: was like, Okay, it's eight pm. I love him. No,

1042
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:32,319
Speaker 4: like he it's eight pm, start wrapping it up.

1043
00:50:32,719 --> 00:50:34,879
Speaker 2: Oh, you actually get off the phone by five eight

1044
00:50:34,880 --> 00:50:37,480
Speaker 2: oh five, So it's not that they have to call

1045
00:50:37,520 --> 00:50:38,840
Speaker 2: you by eight oh five.

1046
00:50:39,040 --> 00:50:41,600
Speaker 5: We're like, we're done talking, We're done. Like now it's

1047
00:50:41,600 --> 00:50:43,759
Speaker 5: time for me to get in my word, spend time

1048
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,000
Speaker 5: with the Lord. And I'm sleep by like eight forty

1049
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:46,520
Speaker 5: five nine.

1050
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:47,759
Speaker 2: Are you going to sleep real early?

1051
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:48,959
Speaker 4: Yeah, because I get up early.

1052
00:50:49,120 --> 00:50:49,440
Speaker 2: Okay.

1053
00:50:50,000 --> 00:50:50,200
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1054
00:50:50,440 --> 00:50:53,160
Speaker 2: I thought you had some thing about all these booty

1055
00:50:53,160 --> 00:50:54,040
Speaker 2: call hours after this.

1056
00:50:54,200 --> 00:50:56,640
Speaker 4: Well that is true too, That is true too. But

1057
00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:59,280
Speaker 4: I was very strict about my my regimen.

1058
00:50:59,560 --> 00:51:02,719
Speaker 1: I really respected that, and I like that was one

1059
00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:04,480
Speaker 1: of the things that really attracted me to her, was like,

1060
00:51:04,719 --> 00:51:07,240
Speaker 1: she has a level of discipline. Yeah, and she really

1061
00:51:07,320 --> 00:51:09,279
Speaker 1: cherishes her time with the Lord that she's willing to

1062
00:51:09,320 --> 00:51:11,799
Speaker 1: cut off the rest of the world and people she's

1063
00:51:11,800 --> 00:51:14,000
Speaker 1: talking to, no matter how much he's enjoying the conversation

1064
00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:18,240
Speaker 1: to go spend time with the Lord. And so that

1065
00:51:18,239 --> 00:51:20,160
Speaker 1: that was one thing that I was like that, Yes, nah,

1066
00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:22,560
Speaker 1: she she ain't average, that's for sure.

1067
00:51:23,680 --> 00:51:27,080
Speaker 2: And so you was trying to fight your flash from

1068
00:51:27,080 --> 00:51:29,160
Speaker 2: calling her. Then you called and she told you, hey,

1069
00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:30,080
Speaker 2: were you wait too long.

1070
00:51:29,920 --> 00:51:31,759
Speaker 1: For and go to sleep and make you feel I

1071
00:51:31,800 --> 00:51:33,160
Speaker 1: was like, I am missing another day.

1072
00:51:34,040 --> 00:51:36,040
Speaker 4: He did, that's right. You better strike while the iron

1073
00:51:36,160 --> 00:51:36,760
Speaker 4: is hot.

1074
00:51:36,719 --> 00:51:39,839
Speaker 1: Right and early, I will be your first message, your

1075
00:51:39,880 --> 00:51:40,520
Speaker 1: first message.

1076
00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:44,239
Speaker 5: Yes, Well, the times we hung out too, he didn't.

1077
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:46,520
Speaker 5: It was like he didn't text me usually because he's

1078
00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:48,560
Speaker 5: back back to back and once I see a pattern,

1079
00:51:48,640 --> 00:51:50,560
Speaker 5: I'm like, why are you changing up? Yeah, and we're

1080
00:51:50,560 --> 00:51:52,919
Speaker 5: supposed to hang out around one pm and he didn't

1081
00:51:52,960 --> 00:51:54,759
Speaker 5: text me until like twelve to let me know he

1082
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,759
Speaker 5: was almost here, and I, you know, we get in

1083
00:51:57,760 --> 00:52:00,040
Speaker 5: the car, we hang out, and after it, when I

1084
00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:02,840
Speaker 5: I was getting out the car, I turned, I said, so,

1085
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:04,200
Speaker 5: why didn't you text me all day?

1086
00:52:04,960 --> 00:52:07,919
Speaker 1: He was like I thought. I was like, we finish

1087
00:52:07,920 --> 00:52:10,799
Speaker 1: see each other. I don't want to talk too much

1088
00:52:10,840 --> 00:52:13,960
Speaker 1: and then have nothing to talk about. I was like,

1089
00:52:14,600 --> 00:52:16,440
Speaker 1: let her know what I'm on the way, but she was.

1090
00:52:16,480 --> 00:52:19,400
Speaker 1: She was like, you know, you need to continue.

1091
00:52:18,920 --> 00:52:19,480
Speaker 2: To do.

1092
00:52:21,160 --> 00:52:24,240
Speaker 4: Married Newsflashy.

1093
00:52:25,480 --> 00:52:29,920
Speaker 2: You can't run out of nothing that people actually had.

1094
00:52:30,040 --> 00:52:32,560
Speaker 2: I had to run out of all you keep doing

1095
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:35,560
Speaker 2: is deeper and deeper, and outside of that, you just talking.

1096
00:52:35,960 --> 00:52:38,480
Speaker 3: It doesn't have to be so programmed and rehearsed. It

1097
00:52:38,520 --> 00:52:41,920
Speaker 3: doesn't be just talking about whatever. I mean, whatever, just

1098
00:52:41,960 --> 00:52:44,400
Speaker 3: whatever's going on in that moment you can talk about,

1099
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:45,439
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying.

1100
00:52:45,520 --> 00:52:48,920
Speaker 2: It's like, so that's good that you actually thought that.

1101
00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:51,960
Speaker 3: And I always got to quantify age to be like,

1102
00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:56,839
Speaker 3: it's things that we were taught that as men. It's

1103
00:52:56,920 --> 00:52:59,520
Speaker 3: just be wrong. It's just so wrong. That's the reason

1104
00:52:59,520 --> 00:53:02,000
Speaker 3: why I wrote Shameless Plug. That's why I rote Student

1105
00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:05,880
Speaker 3: of Look is because I want people to undo some

1106
00:53:05,960 --> 00:53:08,120
Speaker 3: things that we thought, you know what I'm saying, and

1107
00:53:08,560 --> 00:53:11,680
Speaker 3: unrealistic expectations that we have for other people. That's what

1108
00:53:11,680 --> 00:53:14,360
Speaker 3: this book's about. It teaches people to say, get the

1109
00:53:14,480 --> 00:53:18,080
Speaker 3: experience of exploring the knowledge of somebody else so that

1110
00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:21,160
Speaker 3: they can weigh in on the journey. Because she's over

1111
00:53:21,160 --> 00:53:23,480
Speaker 3: here saying I want to talk to you, and you like,

1112
00:53:23,520 --> 00:53:24,839
Speaker 3: I don't want to run out of stuff to talk

1113
00:53:24,880 --> 00:53:26,520
Speaker 3: to you, and she's like, get that to me.

1114
00:53:26,800 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 2: I could trust me, I ain't gonna run out and

1115
00:53:28,200 --> 00:53:29,520
Speaker 2: nothing to talk about it. You know what I'm saying.

1116
00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:31,920
Speaker 2: It's like you're trying to do a relationship or a

1117
00:53:31,920 --> 00:53:35,200
Speaker 2: friendship one sided instead of opening up your mind and

1118
00:53:35,200 --> 00:53:36,560
Speaker 2: heart for the other. Personal weigh in.

1119
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:39,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's so true, and you know it's so important

1120
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:43,880
Speaker 1: that you unlearn those things. Yeah, because one thing that

1121
00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 1: the Lord had told me, and it was actually around

1122
00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:49,719
Speaker 1: the time when we first met, he said, congratulations, you

1123
00:53:49,760 --> 00:53:52,279
Speaker 1: are not a point where I can teach you the

1124
00:53:52,320 --> 00:53:56,080
Speaker 1: things that you need to know to be married that part.

1125
00:53:56,239 --> 00:53:58,440
Speaker 1: But it wasn't to just be married to anybody. It

1126
00:53:58,520 --> 00:54:02,000
Speaker 1: was to be married to her. So you know, there

1127
00:54:02,040 --> 00:54:04,759
Speaker 1: are general things that you can learn about marriage, but

1128
00:54:04,840 --> 00:54:06,640
Speaker 1: you got to let the Lord leads you on. Okay,

1129
00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:08,399
Speaker 1: this is what you need to learn and get rid

1130
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:11,160
Speaker 1: of if you're going to be married to this person.

1131
00:54:11,880 --> 00:54:17,320
Speaker 1: And the Lord taught me so many things about uh, patience,

1132
00:54:18,280 --> 00:54:22,319
Speaker 1: patience and kind of letting go of the things that

1133
00:54:22,360 --> 00:54:24,640
Speaker 1: I learned in the habits that I created because she

1134
00:54:25,400 --> 00:54:28,240
Speaker 1: as we have a lot in common, but she has differences.

1135
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:33,000
Speaker 1: For example, she's vegan. I'm not. So that was one

1136
00:54:33,040 --> 00:54:35,560
Speaker 1: area when professially, when we first started talking, I'm like, yeah,

1137
00:54:35,719 --> 00:54:36,880
Speaker 1: that was one of the reasons I was like, nah,

1138
00:54:36,920 --> 00:54:37,440
Speaker 1: it's aint.

1139
00:54:37,560 --> 00:54:38,239
Speaker 2: This is gonna work.

1140
00:54:38,360 --> 00:54:43,879
Speaker 1: This is gonna work because I like to eat and

1141
00:54:44,120 --> 00:54:49,680
Speaker 1: I would consider myself a carnivor so and so. But

1142
00:54:50,800 --> 00:54:52,399
Speaker 1: it works, Like how does it work?

1143
00:54:52,400 --> 00:54:54,319
Speaker 4: Because some people may be dealing with that, How does

1144
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:54,840
Speaker 4: that work?

1145
00:54:55,400 --> 00:54:59,439
Speaker 1: Well? Uh, one thing for her that she can always eat,

1146
00:54:59,719 --> 00:55:01,279
Speaker 1: And this is something that she kind of dealt with

1147
00:55:01,280 --> 00:55:04,360
Speaker 1: in past relationships where she didn't feel seen. It is

1148
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:06,880
Speaker 1: because you know, she's vegan and she's she's out and

1149
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:10,160
Speaker 1: about and she wants to eat, and people just wouldn't

1150
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:12,920
Speaker 1: make an effort. I made an effort to know, Okay,

1151
00:55:12,920 --> 00:55:14,520
Speaker 1: what is it that you can eat? What is it

1152
00:55:14,600 --> 00:55:17,160
Speaker 1: that you can't eat? What do you like? What don't

1153
00:55:17,160 --> 00:55:19,239
Speaker 1: you like? And so she let me know, Hey, if

1154
00:55:19,280 --> 00:55:22,200
Speaker 1: we're out and we got short notice, I can always

1155
00:55:22,239 --> 00:55:25,600
Speaker 1: have some fries. We can always go get a pizza

1156
00:55:25,640 --> 00:55:28,399
Speaker 1: and get no cheese on it, and I'm good. So

1157
00:55:28,440 --> 00:55:32,400
Speaker 1: I always make an effort to say, okay, me, I

1158
00:55:32,440 --> 00:55:35,880
Speaker 1: can eat anywhere. I can always find something for me,

1159
00:55:36,520 --> 00:55:38,560
Speaker 1: but I want to take care of you and make

1160
00:55:38,600 --> 00:55:41,480
Speaker 1: sure that you can eat. So my thought process and

1161
00:55:41,520 --> 00:55:44,720
Speaker 1: dealing with this is, let me make sure she's good first.

1162
00:55:45,360 --> 00:55:47,880
Speaker 1: And she's kind of turned me on to some good

1163
00:55:48,680 --> 00:55:49,600
Speaker 1: vegan food.

1164
00:55:52,920 --> 00:55:53,200
Speaker 6: Me too.

1165
00:55:53,480 --> 00:56:00,359
Speaker 1: Califlower is amazing. But it's just being compassionate and being

1166
00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:03,160
Speaker 1: understanding and compromising a little. But you're gonna have to

1167
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:04,320
Speaker 1: surrender some things.

1168
00:56:05,040 --> 00:56:07,360
Speaker 4: So and every time we go out to he always

1169
00:56:07,440 --> 00:56:10,839
Speaker 4: has like two to three options for me. How you

1170
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:11,440
Speaker 4: feeling today?

1171
00:56:11,560 --> 00:56:14,120
Speaker 5: You want you know, Mexican today, you want Asian, or

1172
00:56:14,160 --> 00:56:15,759
Speaker 5: you want Italian, And I'm like.

1173
00:56:16,520 --> 00:56:17,000
Speaker 1: Go for this.

1174
00:56:17,440 --> 00:56:20,560
Speaker 5: So it's just the effort that like, because usually people

1175
00:56:20,600 --> 00:56:22,840
Speaker 5: are like, oh vegan, that's so hard, or they just

1176
00:56:22,840 --> 00:56:25,640
Speaker 5: throw a salad at me and I don't like salad.

1177
00:56:25,760 --> 00:56:29,360
Speaker 5: So I was like, the effort is really what stood

1178
00:56:29,360 --> 00:56:29,719
Speaker 5: out to me.

1179
00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:32,680
Speaker 1: So I did appreciate that it takes you to morph

1180
00:56:32,760 --> 00:56:35,719
Speaker 1: into that mindset. It took a little time. It took

1181
00:56:35,719 --> 00:56:38,799
Speaker 1: a little time because at first I'm like, I don't

1182
00:56:38,840 --> 00:56:43,120
Speaker 1: even know where to start, and you know, not all

1183
00:56:43,239 --> 00:56:47,160
Speaker 1: the vegan food is good. Now. The thing that sets

1184
00:56:47,160 --> 00:56:49,280
Speaker 1: her apart for me is that she is a great cook.

1185
00:56:50,320 --> 00:56:53,600
Speaker 1: So she can cook things in a way that you

1186
00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:58,960
Speaker 1: forget that it's vegan. For example, her baking is phenomenal.

1187
00:56:59,480 --> 00:57:03,000
Speaker 1: You would not even guess that it was vegan. Her

1188
00:57:03,040 --> 00:57:06,720
Speaker 1: cakes or cookies or things like that. So she because

1189
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:09,640
Speaker 1: she loves food, she prepares food in a way where

1190
00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:12,640
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, yes it's vegan, but it's not like

1191
00:57:13,880 --> 00:57:18,400
Speaker 1: a salad. And so seeing how she prepares, seing how

1192
00:57:18,440 --> 00:57:22,200
Speaker 1: she eats, and then she we both as I said, compromise.

1193
00:57:22,360 --> 00:57:25,120
Speaker 1: I was able to compromise with Okay, let me widen

1194
00:57:25,160 --> 00:57:28,520
Speaker 1: my palette a little bit, and she compromises. When we

1195
00:57:28,520 --> 00:57:32,080
Speaker 1: were talking, she said, you know, i'd make you a steak.

1196
00:57:32,360 --> 00:57:36,360
Speaker 1: I said, oh, now, I know that may not that

1197
00:57:36,480 --> 00:57:41,040
Speaker 1: that may seem little wanting over there. You don't understand

1198
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:44,320
Speaker 1: for her to say that to me, I said, oh,

1199
00:57:44,360 --> 00:57:46,960
Speaker 1: this woman loves me. Yeah, because I cares about it.

1200
00:57:46,960 --> 00:57:49,160
Speaker 5: I told him at the beginning, I said, you want

1201
00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:50,240
Speaker 5: me and I'm not cooking it.

1202
00:57:50,160 --> 00:57:53,040
Speaker 2: Like at the beginning to what made you compromise and

1203
00:57:53,080 --> 00:57:53,480
Speaker 2: say that?

1204
00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:55,840
Speaker 5: I just when we got to know each other more

1205
00:57:55,920 --> 00:57:58,000
Speaker 5: connected more and I was like, Danks, this is love.

1206
00:57:58,360 --> 00:58:00,680
Speaker 4: Like I was like, dang, if you can't, I would

1207
00:58:01,240 --> 00:58:03,680
Speaker 4: I would be like this like the whole time. But

1208
00:58:04,920 --> 00:58:08,080
Speaker 4: it flash yeah yeah, so but I was like, you

1209
00:58:08,120 --> 00:58:10,120
Speaker 4: know I could do it. How long have you been vegan?

1210
00:58:10,880 --> 00:58:11,840
Speaker 4: Nine years now?

1211
00:58:12,360 --> 00:58:12,720
Speaker 5: Yeah?

1212
00:58:12,760 --> 00:58:15,600
Speaker 2: So teens. Yeah, it was eighteen.

1213
00:58:16,040 --> 00:58:20,200
Speaker 5: Yeah, I started twenty end of twenty seventeen. Yeah, so

1214
00:58:20,320 --> 00:58:21,400
Speaker 5: fully in twenty eighteen.

1215
00:58:21,520 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 4: What prompted that?

1216
00:58:23,400 --> 00:58:26,160
Speaker 5: I did a fast, a forty day fast. You know,

1217
00:58:26,200 --> 00:58:29,640
Speaker 5: like after a fast you start to taste everything, and

1218
00:58:30,120 --> 00:58:32,640
Speaker 5: they just didn't taste the same. And I went just

1219
00:58:32,720 --> 00:58:35,880
Speaker 5: eating chicken and fish. The last thing to go was fish.

1220
00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:40,480
Speaker 5: And sometimes you know your backslide. No, no, but my

1221
00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:44,800
Speaker 5: mom she loves seafood, so she'd be cooking and I'm like, oh,

1222
00:58:44,920 --> 00:58:47,360
Speaker 5: you miss it. Yeah, but I know if I ate

1223
00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:50,480
Speaker 5: it out, like thinking about eating it is not for me.

1224
00:58:50,640 --> 00:58:52,760
Speaker 4: So it's just my lifestyle now.

1225
00:58:53,040 --> 00:58:55,480
Speaker 2: So what would y'all do when y'all get married and

1226
00:58:55,520 --> 00:58:56,120
Speaker 2: have kids.

1227
00:58:56,200 --> 00:58:58,400
Speaker 3: Would you try to raise your kids to be vegan

1228
00:58:58,560 --> 00:59:00,600
Speaker 3: or would you acquiesced them.

1229
00:59:00,440 --> 00:59:01,040
Speaker 2: Or what would that?

1230
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:04,520
Speaker 5: So we've had this conversation and I told him, we'll

1231
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:06,480
Speaker 5: raise them how it will raise him, like in the faith,

1232
00:59:07,160 --> 00:59:10,600
Speaker 5: like show him how I'll like, I'll be.

1233
00:59:10,560 --> 00:59:11,200
Speaker 4: The main cook.

1234
00:59:11,680 --> 00:59:14,320
Speaker 5: But if they see, you know, him eating a steak,

1235
00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 5: you just you know, you could try it, but it's

1236
00:59:16,760 --> 00:59:17,240
Speaker 5: your choice.

1237
00:59:17,240 --> 00:59:18,280
Speaker 4: At the end of the day, when you get.

1238
00:59:18,120 --> 00:59:22,040
Speaker 2: Older, as a kid, what would you have eaten too?

1239
00:59:24,280 --> 00:59:27,640
Speaker 2: I don't know this conversation.

1240
00:59:28,840 --> 00:59:31,520
Speaker 5: I think, like, honestly, don't eat what I eat, but

1241
00:59:31,920 --> 00:59:36,560
Speaker 5: just like a mix and everything. But I told him, regardless,

1242
00:59:36,560 --> 00:59:39,880
Speaker 5: it's gonna be healthy, like we him doing fast food,

1243
00:59:40,960 --> 00:59:43,800
Speaker 5: none of that, like all like healthy whole foods, because

1244
00:59:44,960 --> 00:59:48,320
Speaker 5: you know the food's out there today, it's just not good.

1245
00:59:48,120 --> 00:59:48,600
Speaker 4: For the body.

1246
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:52,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, we actually were just talking about we went to

1247
00:59:52,760 --> 00:59:56,320
Speaker 5: Costco yesterday and there's this app called.

1248
00:59:58,440 --> 01:00:00,960
Speaker 4: What is it called me? Oh, we're not going to

1249
01:00:01,040 --> 01:00:06,360
Speaker 4: say it, but I think I know what you're talking about.

1250
01:00:06,440 --> 01:00:10,520
Speaker 5: Well, I don't know, but we were scanning all of the.

1251
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:15,120
Speaker 2: Food just to see like a called Yuka y u ka.

1252
01:00:14,720 --> 01:00:16,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, in case you know.

1253
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:19,760
Speaker 5: But anyway, we were scanning to see, like we're committed

1254
01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:22,480
Speaker 5: to eating healthier and doing better, and so we were

1255
01:00:22,480 --> 01:00:24,800
Speaker 5: scanning all of our food selections and there was almost

1256
01:00:24,880 --> 01:00:25,920
Speaker 5: like nothing.

1257
01:00:26,040 --> 01:00:27,440
Speaker 2: I think that way, I got.

1258
01:00:27,280 --> 01:00:30,520
Speaker 3: A good rating, So you think over fifty is considered good.

1259
01:00:30,640 --> 01:00:33,160
Speaker 3: So fifty to one hundred, you scanning like I've been

1260
01:00:33,160 --> 01:00:33,480
Speaker 3: eating it.

1261
01:00:33,680 --> 01:00:36,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, but we're trying to get about eighty eighty.

1262
01:00:36,200 --> 01:00:38,920
Speaker 3: I scan some stuff that must say zero. I said,

1263
01:00:39,880 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 3: I've been feeding nutritional value zero zeros.

1264
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:47,840
Speaker 2: The air what is this?

1265
01:00:47,920 --> 01:00:48,360
Speaker 4: It's hard.

1266
01:00:48,440 --> 01:00:50,640
Speaker 3: It was like, I said, this is terrible, and then

1267
01:00:50,680 --> 01:00:53,160
Speaker 3: I started. I end up changing up my soap to

1268
01:00:53,560 --> 01:00:57,640
Speaker 3: what doctor browns. Yeah, I ended up scanning the soap

1269
01:00:58,080 --> 01:00:58,479
Speaker 3: that I.

1270
01:00:58,440 --> 01:01:02,120
Speaker 2: Used to use. It was A sixty eight or something.

1271
01:01:02,520 --> 01:01:04,600
Speaker 3: And then then it was like, all right, if you

1272
01:01:04,640 --> 01:01:07,000
Speaker 3: get this one that's for sensitive skin, that was like

1273
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:08,880
Speaker 3: a seventy three and I said, let me go and

1274
01:01:08,880 --> 01:01:10,600
Speaker 3: scan this that was one hundred.

1275
01:01:10,640 --> 01:01:13,400
Speaker 1: And I said, because that's my soap.

1276
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:16,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, she gets the liquid version of and I said,

1277
01:01:16,200 --> 01:01:18,880
Speaker 2: let me go and get the bar soap.

1278
01:01:19,000 --> 01:01:21,680
Speaker 3: And I was just like all right. So it's just

1279
01:01:21,720 --> 01:01:24,400
Speaker 3: it's just those small steps to a better lifestyle. You know,

1280
01:01:24,400 --> 01:01:27,680
Speaker 3: I'm forty seven years old, be forty eight on March

1281
01:01:27,760 --> 01:01:29,560
Speaker 3: or twenty ninth, and so I just want to be

1282
01:01:29,640 --> 01:01:32,440
Speaker 3: very intentional about my health and making sure that I

1283
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:35,080
Speaker 3: stay along, stay around as long as possible.

1284
01:01:35,360 --> 01:01:38,240
Speaker 2: And so it's those those small steps that I've been doing.

1285
01:01:38,480 --> 01:01:40,160
Speaker 3: I ain't gonna say it smarty been huge, because it's

1286
01:01:40,160 --> 01:01:43,040
Speaker 3: been drastic over the last sixty days.

1287
01:01:43,720 --> 01:01:45,640
Speaker 2: Being married is to be able to say, all right,

1288
01:01:45,720 --> 01:01:47,560
Speaker 2: because she always been trying to make me feel guilty, Tom,

1289
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:49,320
Speaker 2: I want you to be around long and I'd be.

1290
01:01:49,240 --> 01:01:54,280
Speaker 1: Like, that's the same thing.

1291
01:01:54,040 --> 01:02:00,520
Speaker 5: McDonald's, Yeah, yeah, that is, and all I'm not even

1292
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:02,040
Speaker 5: gonna plug these places.

1293
01:02:02,080 --> 01:02:03,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, all these fast.

1294
01:02:03,880 --> 01:02:05,760
Speaker 1: Food No talk about it terrible.

1295
01:02:06,680 --> 01:02:09,400
Speaker 4: It did not bless your heart, bless my soul. It

1296
01:02:09,400 --> 01:02:16,080
Speaker 4: didn't bless your heart, my stomach, I tell you.

1297
01:02:16,120 --> 01:02:18,760
Speaker 3: But that's what that's when you allow your help mate,

1298
01:02:19,160 --> 01:02:22,480
Speaker 3: we go back around to become that suitable helper. And

1299
01:02:22,520 --> 01:02:25,000
Speaker 3: we have to allow the space and the grace for

1300
01:02:25,240 --> 01:02:27,960
Speaker 3: our women to speak into our lives like that, because

1301
01:02:27,960 --> 01:02:29,120
Speaker 3: at the end of the day, left to myf if

1302
01:02:29,120 --> 01:02:30,600
Speaker 3: I'm gonna stay single and do what I want to

1303
01:02:30,640 --> 01:02:33,520
Speaker 3: do and just kill myself slowly, then I just stay single.

1304
01:02:33,720 --> 01:02:36,080
Speaker 3: But if God said I'm gonna give you a suitable helper,

1305
01:02:36,120 --> 01:02:38,800
Speaker 3: then I have to acquiesce to her wisdom and say, hey,

1306
01:02:39,080 --> 01:02:39,600
Speaker 3: here it is.

1307
01:02:39,640 --> 01:02:41,120
Speaker 2: You might want to go do this. Why don't you

1308
01:02:41,120 --> 01:02:42,080
Speaker 2: try this? Do this?

1309
01:02:42,160 --> 01:02:44,440
Speaker 3: And it's like, now she we're trying to throw away

1310
01:02:44,480 --> 01:02:46,280
Speaker 3: all the plastics. This morning she woke up, she was like,

1311
01:02:46,520 --> 01:02:48,400
Speaker 3: now we gotta get rid of all the plastics.

1312
01:02:48,520 --> 01:02:50,320
Speaker 4: I'm trying to get rid of plastics for so long,

1313
01:02:50,840 --> 01:02:51,560
Speaker 4: said you just do it too.

1314
01:02:51,640 --> 01:02:51,800
Speaker 1: Much.

1315
01:02:51,880 --> 01:02:54,080
Speaker 4: You know, plastics, Well, I'm not even gonna say it.

1316
01:02:54,200 --> 01:02:55,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's just it's just it's not.

1317
01:02:56,040 --> 01:02:58,280
Speaker 4: Healthy for not good for you. They mess up a

1318
01:02:58,320 --> 01:02:59,760
Speaker 4: lot of good things in your life.

1319
01:02:59,800 --> 01:03:02,040
Speaker 3: And so she always like, I'm like, just eating on

1320
01:03:02,080 --> 01:03:04,920
Speaker 3: a plastic plate. I'm saying different between putting it in

1321
01:03:04,920 --> 01:03:06,200
Speaker 3: a microwave and all that.

1322
01:03:06,800 --> 01:03:09,160
Speaker 2: Just don't don't be eating with plastic forks. And I said,

1323
01:03:09,320 --> 01:03:13,880
Speaker 2: I mean, we have watching all these dish but get.

1324
01:03:13,800 --> 01:03:20,360
Speaker 5: How good looks look this working six pack is coming it.

1325
01:03:22,080 --> 01:03:23,959
Speaker 3: So she keep doing all that, and I just said,

1326
01:03:24,080 --> 01:03:25,640
Speaker 3: and that's what I told her about. I told her

1327
01:03:25,680 --> 01:03:28,720
Speaker 3: about sixty days ago. I said, all right, because after

1328
01:03:28,760 --> 01:03:31,640
Speaker 3: I look at as a challenge, I was like, all right, okay, watch,

1329
01:03:31,680 --> 01:03:33,360
Speaker 3: I'm going to go in and I'm going to go home.

1330
01:03:33,680 --> 01:03:35,680
Speaker 2: And that's just exactly what I did. So it's like,

1331
01:03:36,120 --> 01:03:39,600
Speaker 2: so again, I appreciate you for your wisdom and your

1332
01:03:39,680 --> 01:03:42,760
Speaker 2: care and your desire to make me the best version

1333
01:03:42,920 --> 01:03:45,760
Speaker 2: of myself, amen, so that I could be around for

1334
01:03:45,920 --> 01:03:46,600
Speaker 2: years to come.

1335
01:03:46,600 --> 01:03:48,280
Speaker 5: Right, And I also just want to take this time

1336
01:03:48,320 --> 01:03:51,240
Speaker 5: to say, you know, we went to the doctor, and

1337
01:03:51,320 --> 01:03:57,080
Speaker 5: so ladies, take your husband's, your boyfriends, your significant others

1338
01:03:57,400 --> 01:04:00,120
Speaker 5: to the doctor and make sure that they are getting

1339
01:04:00,240 --> 01:04:03,160
Speaker 5: the proper tests for their age.

1340
01:04:03,360 --> 01:04:05,160
Speaker 2: Man, no, this girl, we're gonna try and tell that

1341
01:04:05,200 --> 01:04:08,120
Speaker 2: doctor to stick his finger in my booty hole. That's

1342
01:04:08,160 --> 01:04:09,520
Speaker 2: what you did. That's what she's doing.

1343
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:10,880
Speaker 1: Forty five.

1344
01:04:11,400 --> 01:04:12,800
Speaker 4: You mentioned that you're forty seven.

1345
01:04:12,840 --> 01:04:17,280
Speaker 5: At forty five, black men should be getting their prostate check.

1346
01:04:17,600 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 2: I understand it.

1347
01:04:18,360 --> 01:04:22,120
Speaker 3: So the doctor checked me at twenty three, twenty four

1348
01:04:22,200 --> 01:04:22,600
Speaker 3: or whatever.

1349
01:04:23,200 --> 01:04:24,560
Speaker 4: H and he's forty seven, now.

1350
01:04:24,480 --> 01:04:28,200
Speaker 3: Forty seven, And so we go to doctor stop laughing

1351
01:04:28,240 --> 01:04:31,280
Speaker 3: over the Rihanna and Rihanna's background laughing, and so Rihanna

1352
01:04:31,760 --> 01:04:34,560
Speaker 3: so as to gonna tell that doctor talking about well

1353
01:04:34,560 --> 01:04:35,840
Speaker 3: he needs to get his prostrate check.

1354
01:04:35,920 --> 01:04:38,720
Speaker 2: He said, well, I mean he can actually wait till fifty.

1355
01:04:38,800 --> 01:04:41,960
Speaker 2: Me and him was on the same page. Men understand me,

1356
01:04:42,360 --> 01:04:45,400
Speaker 2: we understand. She was like, he said, she said, no,

1357
01:04:45,440 --> 01:04:47,760
Speaker 2: I need them do it now. Study show at forty five. Yeah,

1358
01:04:47,880 --> 01:04:48,640
Speaker 2: he said. Men.

1359
01:04:48,960 --> 01:04:51,480
Speaker 3: And he's a black man about seventy years old. So

1360
01:04:51,520 --> 01:04:54,840
Speaker 3: he was like, he was like, you actually.

1361
01:04:54,520 --> 01:04:56,400
Speaker 2: Wait to fifty. She's like, I want you to do it.

1362
01:04:57,080 --> 01:04:59,360
Speaker 3: She said, you want me to do it now now?

1363
01:04:59,480 --> 01:05:02,560
Speaker 3: And he said that she said yes, now. And I

1364
01:05:02,600 --> 01:05:05,480
Speaker 3: just sat there like I was her son, just sat

1365
01:05:05,520 --> 01:05:11,120
Speaker 3: there and that man said, all right, go ahead, go

1366
01:05:11,160 --> 01:05:14,200
Speaker 3: ahead and leave the room.

1367
01:05:15,000 --> 01:05:17,959
Speaker 2: I'm here now. I'm here now stopped putting his little

1368
01:05:18,160 --> 01:05:18,920
Speaker 2: rubber gloves on.

1369
01:05:19,200 --> 01:05:19,840
Speaker 4: He didn't want to do it.

1370
01:05:20,240 --> 01:05:22,120
Speaker 3: He didn't, he was just begrudged. He said, so she

1371
01:05:22,200 --> 01:05:23,600
Speaker 3: really wants you to do this right now?

1372
01:05:23,640 --> 01:05:25,600
Speaker 1: I said, right now, yeap.

1373
01:05:26,640 --> 01:05:28,400
Speaker 3: And that man went and pulled out a little package

1374
01:05:28,440 --> 01:05:30,800
Speaker 3: of some little luprication. I said, brother, this is just

1375
01:05:30,800 --> 01:05:32,560
Speaker 3: going bad. I said, I think you're gonna need two

1376
01:05:32,560 --> 01:05:34,280
Speaker 3: of those. Don't just just squirt one of them. Just

1377
01:05:34,280 --> 01:05:36,360
Speaker 3: gonna need by two of those, my lord. That man

1378
01:05:36,440 --> 01:05:38,320
Speaker 3: got the squirt down his finger, and the whole time

1379
01:05:38,360 --> 01:05:39,680
Speaker 3: while she was talking to him, I was looking at

1380
01:05:39,720 --> 01:05:42,480
Speaker 3: his fingers. I said, his fingers are long. I said,

1381
01:05:42,480 --> 01:05:46,640
Speaker 3: his fingers is too fat and long. I'm traumatized over

1382
01:05:46,640 --> 01:05:48,240
Speaker 3: the game. But I'm trying to do you. I'm trying

1383
01:05:48,280 --> 01:05:49,160
Speaker 3: to help you understand this.

1384
01:05:49,240 --> 01:05:49,439
Speaker 4: Now.

1385
01:05:49,800 --> 01:05:51,040
Speaker 2: You got fifteen more years.

1386
01:05:52,440 --> 01:05:54,880
Speaker 3: And I was sitting I said, wow, I said, with

1387
01:05:55,080 --> 01:05:58,840
Speaker 3: modern technology, haven't advanced to something than just.

1388
01:05:58,760 --> 01:05:59,919
Speaker 2: Get a sample of love?

1389
01:06:03,240 --> 01:06:06,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, but that's not the modern technology. And I'm just

1390
01:06:06,800 --> 01:06:08,560
Speaker 3: gonna tell it's gonna be I said, I'm gonna make

1391
01:06:08,560 --> 01:06:10,640
Speaker 3: a realize this, so might as well be here. So

1392
01:06:10,760 --> 01:06:13,760
Speaker 3: what they do The man put his finger in my

1393
01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:16,800
Speaker 3: rectum and he kept trying to tell me loosen up,

1394
01:06:16,880 --> 01:06:20,800
Speaker 3: loosen up. He said, you're resisting. I said, I'm resistance.

1395
01:06:20,800 --> 01:06:21,960
Speaker 3: I'm supposed to be resisting.

1396
01:06:22,400 --> 01:06:24,840
Speaker 2: Talking about you're resisting, He's like, you need to spread

1397
01:06:24,920 --> 01:06:26,760
Speaker 2: the limbs. I said, I don't like these conversations.

1398
01:06:26,800 --> 01:06:29,720
Speaker 3: I don't like what you're saying. I'm sitting the proud tense.

1399
01:06:30,480 --> 01:06:33,000
Speaker 3: I was like, man, he was like, just just just

1400
01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:37,280
Speaker 3: just just just relax. How do you relax with you

1401
01:06:37,800 --> 01:06:42,040
Speaker 3: time is facing some dude and he's shoving his finger

1402
01:06:42,120 --> 01:06:44,000
Speaker 3: in your rectum, Like, how do you do that? It

1403
01:06:44,080 --> 01:06:47,400
Speaker 3: actually didn't understand that. It's it's it's traumatic mentally to

1404
01:06:48,560 --> 01:06:50,000
Speaker 3: go through that. So I'm sitting there and I just

1405
01:06:50,080 --> 01:06:52,280
Speaker 3: kept saying, all right, be around longer. You want to

1406
01:06:52,320 --> 01:06:57,040
Speaker 3: detect possible signs of prostate cancer earlier. Just just get it,

1407
01:06:57,120 --> 01:06:58,680
Speaker 3: just go through it, and you have the peace of

1408
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:01,960
Speaker 3: mind of knowing that everything's okay. So I went through

1409
01:07:01,960 --> 01:07:04,840
Speaker 3: that process and then what they do is they pulled

1410
01:07:04,920 --> 01:07:08,200
Speaker 3: out a stool sample on his finger. That's how far

1411
01:07:08,240 --> 01:07:11,120
Speaker 3: he stuck his finger, wiped it on the little the

1412
01:07:11,160 --> 01:07:14,400
Speaker 3: little thing, and and if you changed a certain color,

1413
01:07:14,760 --> 01:07:16,720
Speaker 3: it says that you have prostate cancer.

1414
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:18,080
Speaker 2: If not, it shows you healthy.

1415
01:07:18,360 --> 01:07:21,000
Speaker 3: They ran the test or whatever, did the blood or whatever,

1416
01:07:21,120 --> 01:07:23,440
Speaker 3: and it says I have a really great prostate.

1417
01:07:24,600 --> 01:07:25,800
Speaker 1: We praise God for that.

1418
01:07:25,840 --> 01:07:26,240
Speaker 2: Amen.

1419
01:07:26,440 --> 01:07:29,880
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, amen. Sometimes the process can be messy, but

1420
01:07:29,920 --> 01:07:31,920
Speaker 1: it's good to know, you know what I'm saying that

1421
01:07:32,000 --> 01:07:34,760
Speaker 1: at the end of it, yes, appreciate it. At the

1422
01:07:34,880 --> 01:07:36,080
Speaker 1: end of it, you know that.

1423
01:07:36,080 --> 01:07:40,320
Speaker 5: You have a clean come on, clean clean bill aheall

1424
01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:41,600
Speaker 5: that's all I.

1425
01:07:41,560 --> 01:07:43,000
Speaker 4: Wanted, I said.

1426
01:07:43,000 --> 01:07:44,560
Speaker 3: I wish you would have stayed in there. I was like,

1427
01:07:44,600 --> 01:07:46,560
Speaker 3: I wish you would have saw this. She wouldn't be

1428
01:07:46,600 --> 01:07:47,760
Speaker 3: able to look at me the same.

1429
01:07:48,080 --> 01:07:51,600
Speaker 4: I mean, women, we have to just be all out there,

1430
01:07:52,080 --> 01:07:55,760
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying. Everybody in our you know space.

1431
01:07:56,040 --> 01:07:58,720
Speaker 3: So and I told her that men, there's never a

1432
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:02,160
Speaker 3: moment where a man has to have his body touched

1433
01:08:02,200 --> 01:08:06,120
Speaker 3: like that from a doctor's exam. It's just that doesn't happen.

1434
01:08:06,120 --> 01:08:09,040
Speaker 3: Women go there and you know, have their annuals or whatnot.

1435
01:08:09,200 --> 01:08:11,600
Speaker 3: From the age and whenever they start going twelve years old,

1436
01:08:11,680 --> 01:08:14,080
Speaker 3: thirteen whatever, and it's a cycle that they go through

1437
01:08:15,160 --> 01:08:18,839
Speaker 3: all those years, and then a man forty five years

1438
01:08:19,320 --> 01:08:23,640
Speaker 3: goes through all that time without somebody touching them like that, hopefully,

1439
01:08:23,840 --> 01:08:26,160
Speaker 3: and then he gets forty five years old and then

1440
01:08:26,640 --> 01:08:29,960
Speaker 3: it's like it's traumatic. It's like what this man is? Yeah,

1441
01:08:30,479 --> 01:08:33,080
Speaker 3: it just it was just a lot. And I was

1442
01:08:33,120 --> 01:08:35,880
Speaker 3: just sitting there the whole time, like kept on stage.

1443
01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:39,280
Speaker 3: Posted a video where he talked about that, saying, you know, men,

1444
01:08:40,880 --> 01:08:44,040
Speaker 3: prioritize your health. Go make sure you get check ups,

1445
01:08:44,680 --> 01:08:46,439
Speaker 3: and the men started just roasting him.

1446
01:08:46,439 --> 01:08:47,240
Speaker 2: I ain't finna go.

1447
01:08:48,000 --> 01:08:50,000
Speaker 3: If you just want to think in your booty, just

1448
01:08:50,000 --> 01:08:53,000
Speaker 3: say that, and they were just comment on the comments

1449
01:08:53,080 --> 01:08:55,599
Speaker 3: and was so bad that he had made another video

1450
01:08:55,760 --> 01:08:57,160
Speaker 3: like I don't care if y'all, I don't care if

1451
01:08:57,160 --> 01:08:59,360
Speaker 3: you die, whatever happened to you, if you don't want

1452
01:08:59,360 --> 01:09:01,920
Speaker 3: to forget it, because I don't worry, y'all like attacking

1453
01:09:01,960 --> 01:09:04,639
Speaker 3: me because I'm telling you to prioritize your health.

1454
01:09:05,000 --> 01:09:06,000
Speaker 2: But that's how it is.

1455
01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:09,439
Speaker 3: Another thing we need to unlearn as men, as black men,

1456
01:09:09,800 --> 01:09:13,679
Speaker 3: to go to the doctor, run these labs, get these tests,

1457
01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:16,840
Speaker 3: so that we can be around longer for our family. Yes,

1458
01:09:17,000 --> 01:09:19,040
Speaker 3: and that's that's that's what I do.

1459
01:09:19,280 --> 01:09:24,000
Speaker 1: That unlearning thing can be hard times because when we

1460
01:09:24,320 --> 01:09:28,280
Speaker 1: got closer kind of to the concert, like we're establishing

1461
01:09:28,360 --> 01:09:30,640
Speaker 1: like we really like each other, we have feelings for

1462
01:09:30,720 --> 01:09:32,280
Speaker 1: each other, and so we got to a point where

1463
01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:37,120
Speaker 1: we're like, Okay, we need to fast, we need to fast,

1464
01:09:37,240 --> 01:09:43,720
Speaker 1: we need to pray. Because I'm she already knew, mind you,

1465
01:09:44,400 --> 01:09:47,120
Speaker 1: she prayed and she heard the Lord say, you know,

1466
01:09:48,000 --> 01:09:52,840
Speaker 1: go ahead me. I'm still nervous from the last relationship,

1467
01:09:53,240 --> 01:09:55,080
Speaker 1: so I'm thinking, like I already know. So no, you

1468
01:09:55,080 --> 01:09:57,519
Speaker 1: ain't gotta tell me. Lord, you ain't got to tell me.

1469
01:09:57,560 --> 01:10:00,400
Speaker 1: You don't gotta y'all on need no profit coming to me. No,

1470
01:10:00,479 --> 01:10:03,080
Speaker 1: you in sin, brother, you shouldn't be with that woman.

1471
01:10:03,200 --> 01:10:05,240
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't need that. I already know, already

1472
01:10:05,280 --> 01:10:08,840
Speaker 1: know you're gonna say nothing. I have gotten a prophecy

1473
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:11,840
Speaker 1: or two about now. They were on and sometimes people

1474
01:10:11,840 --> 01:10:14,000
Speaker 1: don't be on because I did get a pross said

1475
01:10:14,000 --> 01:10:16,599
Speaker 1: that one of the woman women that I dated was

1476
01:10:16,640 --> 01:10:19,200
Speaker 1: the one. So they were off thee. The Lord helped them,

1477
01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:24,360
Speaker 1: but uh yeah, I didn't. I was. I was convinced

1478
01:10:24,400 --> 01:10:25,760
Speaker 1: that it was going to be a no. And so

1479
01:10:28,320 --> 01:10:31,680
Speaker 1: on this concert day, I'm anticipating, at this last day,

1480
01:10:31,680 --> 01:10:34,840
Speaker 1: we're gonna see each other. Really, yeah, yeah, you.

1481
01:10:34,880 --> 01:10:35,760
Speaker 2: Don't quiet quit?

1482
01:10:36,240 --> 01:10:36,840
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah?

1483
01:10:36,920 --> 01:10:38,680
Speaker 1: Yeah. It was because.

1484
01:10:40,200 --> 01:10:40,760
Speaker 2: Everything was.

1485
01:10:41,920 --> 01:10:42,840
Speaker 4: But here's the thing.

1486
01:10:43,200 --> 01:10:46,920
Speaker 5: He suggested the fast and I was like, okay, but

1487
01:10:47,120 --> 01:10:51,080
Speaker 5: I prayed before because I'm big on like, if you're

1488
01:10:51,120 --> 01:10:53,200
Speaker 5: not the one, let me know now. I just I'm

1489
01:10:53,200 --> 01:10:55,960
Speaker 5: not wasting time. But I kept telling him, I said,

1490
01:10:55,960 --> 01:10:57,000
Speaker 5: did you ask the Lord yet?

1491
01:10:58,479 --> 01:10:59,040
Speaker 1: I was scared.

1492
01:10:59,120 --> 01:11:01,720
Speaker 5: He kept telling me like, I'm not praying about it,

1493
01:11:01,840 --> 01:11:03,680
Speaker 5: and I was like, okay, I'm about to cut this

1494
01:11:03,760 --> 01:11:06,600
Speaker 5: off because you obviously don't care. So he told me

1495
01:11:06,640 --> 01:11:09,599
Speaker 5: to fast. He said we should both fast, and then

1496
01:11:09,680 --> 01:11:11,720
Speaker 5: he goes into it saying, oh, I'm not gonna fast

1497
01:11:11,760 --> 01:11:12,479
Speaker 5: already know what to know.

1498
01:11:14,600 --> 01:11:19,519
Speaker 1: I I made a lot of mistakes. Guys, Okay, don't

1499
01:11:19,600 --> 01:11:24,760
Speaker 1: let trauma keep you from your blessing. Because I was

1500
01:11:24,800 --> 01:11:28,880
Speaker 1: so afraid of getting another no, hearing another no from

1501
01:11:28,920 --> 01:11:32,439
Speaker 1: the Lord and getting my heart broke again that I

1502
01:11:33,320 --> 01:11:35,960
Speaker 1: had too fast. I had it was the only way

1503
01:11:35,960 --> 01:11:37,760
Speaker 1: that I was going to hear the Lord clearly, and

1504
01:11:37,800 --> 01:11:41,719
Speaker 1: so uh, we go to concert. It's great, she's having

1505
01:11:41,720 --> 01:11:47,920
Speaker 1: a great time. I'm the last time. Let's see her.

1506
01:11:48,520 --> 01:11:48,720
Speaker 6: Listen.

1507
01:11:48,760 --> 01:11:51,719
Speaker 1: I didn't want to take no pictures because I didn't

1508
01:11:51,720 --> 01:11:53,880
Speaker 1: want the memories. I don't want to make no more

1509
01:11:53,920 --> 01:11:55,679
Speaker 1: memories that I gotta I gotta forget.

1510
01:11:57,160 --> 01:11:58,240
Speaker 2: You didn't want to take no pictures.

1511
01:11:58,760 --> 01:11:59,719
Speaker 1: We took what like.

1512
01:11:59,600 --> 01:12:03,080
Speaker 5: Two, one on my phone and the second one on

1513
01:12:03,120 --> 01:12:04,519
Speaker 5: his phone of the same pose.

1514
01:12:05,400 --> 01:12:07,559
Speaker 1: I want it easily accessible so I could delete it

1515
01:12:08,680 --> 01:12:15,840
Speaker 1: just in case. And that's it, and so that that

1516
01:12:15,920 --> 01:12:21,640
Speaker 1: comes was she was. She was the sweetest, she was

1517
01:12:21,680 --> 01:12:26,120
Speaker 1: such a good woman, so patient to leave after this

1518
01:12:26,479 --> 01:12:30,120
Speaker 1: and listen, I wasn't. I suggested the fast. I wasn't

1519
01:12:30,120 --> 01:12:32,559
Speaker 1: going too fast because I already I thought I already

1520
01:12:32,600 --> 01:12:38,160
Speaker 1: knew the answer. So I covered the day of the fast.

1521
01:12:38,200 --> 01:12:41,360
Speaker 1: I covered my my four things for when I need

1522
01:12:41,360 --> 01:12:46,839
Speaker 1: to hear from the Lord. Fast, pray, seek wise, counsel,

1523
01:12:47,240 --> 01:12:51,759
Speaker 1: getting the word. And so we were fasting. I was praying.

1524
01:12:52,880 --> 01:12:57,719
Speaker 1: Lord said, hey, you need to uh go watch this podcast.

1525
01:12:58,280 --> 01:12:59,760
Speaker 1: I want you to go watch the Dear Future Wife

1526
01:12:59,760 --> 01:13:06,920
Speaker 1: you Poe Guess with albanor his Lovely Wife. And I said,

1527
01:13:06,920 --> 01:13:09,680
Speaker 1: all right, before I watch it, I said, Lord, now,

1528
01:13:09,720 --> 01:13:11,559
Speaker 1: don't let me buy into this, and don't let me

1529
01:13:11,880 --> 01:13:15,599
Speaker 1: here's something I don't need to hear Albner being Albaner.

1530
01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:19,960
Speaker 1: And you know, one of the things he said that

1531
01:13:20,160 --> 01:13:23,559
Speaker 1: just really grasped my spirit as he said that, the

1532
01:13:23,600 --> 01:13:26,120
Speaker 1: Lord told him your singleness is no longer a benefit

1533
01:13:26,160 --> 01:13:26,360
Speaker 1: to you.

1534
01:13:26,439 --> 01:13:27,320
Speaker 2: It's a liability.

1535
01:13:27,520 --> 01:13:31,839
Speaker 1: It's a liability. And that really spoke to me because

1536
01:13:33,400 --> 01:13:36,439
Speaker 1: I thought my singleness was was was a benefit. It

1537
01:13:36,479 --> 01:13:38,639
Speaker 1: was going to be a benefit up until I got married.

1538
01:13:38,880 --> 01:13:41,920
Speaker 1: But it was at that point that no, it's it's

1539
01:13:42,000 --> 01:13:43,720
Speaker 1: no longer going to be a benefit fit for you.

1540
01:13:43,920 --> 01:13:47,920
Speaker 1: You need, as you said, a purpose partner. You need

1541
01:13:47,960 --> 01:13:51,040
Speaker 1: a partner who's going to help further your purpose further

1542
01:13:51,080 --> 01:13:53,479
Speaker 1: what I called you to do. So I said, Okay,

1543
01:13:53,600 --> 01:13:55,120
Speaker 1: I got what you needed me to get, But Lord,

1544
01:13:55,240 --> 01:13:57,360
Speaker 1: let me let me triple check. Let me let me

1545
01:13:57,400 --> 01:14:00,160
Speaker 1: go to the word. Now I go to the world word,

1546
01:14:00,400 --> 01:14:06,639
Speaker 1: I'm flipping through passor slights up. In Proverbs says fathers

1547
01:14:06,680 --> 01:14:12,000
Speaker 1: and sons. Fathers can give their sons wealth and an inheritance,

1548
01:14:12,040 --> 01:14:16,400
Speaker 1: but only the Lord can give an understanding wife woo.

1549
01:14:17,680 --> 01:14:20,360
Speaker 1: And one of the things she always said to me was,

1550
01:14:20,920 --> 01:14:23,519
Speaker 1: I'm very understanding. You don't have to lie to me.

1551
01:14:23,960 --> 01:14:26,080
Speaker 1: You can tell me anything. I will understand.

1552
01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:29,800
Speaker 5: And I told beginning, yeah, I sound very understanding. What

1553
01:14:29,880 --> 01:14:34,080
Speaker 5: my mottol was, I'm very understanding. And if you don't

1554
01:14:34,120 --> 01:14:41,479
Speaker 5: believe me, I understand. So and I told him, I

1555
01:14:41,479 --> 01:14:44,280
Speaker 5: was like, if you be honest the first time, no

1556
01:14:44,280 --> 01:14:47,080
Speaker 5: matter what it is, nine times out of ten, I understand.

1557
01:14:47,120 --> 01:14:50,360
Speaker 5: I'm okay, We're cool. So that was my biggest thing.

1558
01:14:50,680 --> 01:14:53,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, And so once I started, I said, Lord, are

1559
01:14:53,600 --> 01:14:55,680
Speaker 1: you sure, like I need to hear you. Are you

1560
01:14:55,800 --> 01:14:57,920
Speaker 1: sure that this is the direction that you want me

1561
01:14:57,960 --> 01:15:01,559
Speaker 1: to go with this woman? He said, Gabe, all those

1562
01:15:01,560 --> 01:15:06,960
Speaker 1: other women that you dated were your choice. Hmm, this

1563
01:15:07,000 --> 01:15:12,280
Speaker 1: is my choice. I'm her headed. I'm like, are you sure, bro?

1564
01:15:12,360 --> 01:15:14,759
Speaker 1: Because what if she don't fit in with the family.

1565
01:15:14,920 --> 01:15:16,599
Speaker 1: I know you got a great calling on my life

1566
01:15:16,600 --> 01:15:19,679
Speaker 1: and cause ministry and to preach and all these things.

1567
01:15:20,160 --> 01:15:22,640
Speaker 1: Are you sure? I'm like, what if she don't fit in?

1568
01:15:22,680 --> 01:15:25,519
Speaker 1: I don't know if she's ready for the life that

1569
01:15:25,600 --> 01:15:27,840
Speaker 1: you have called me to. And he was like, were

1570
01:15:27,880 --> 01:15:33,679
Speaker 1: you were you ready? Were you ready? I was like, listen,

1571
01:15:34,720 --> 01:15:41,000
Speaker 1: I just be sure. He's like, this is the woman

1572
01:15:41,280 --> 01:15:47,799
Speaker 1: that I have chosen for you. And so everybody fast, pray,

1573
01:15:48,200 --> 01:15:51,000
Speaker 1: seek wise counsel, gets some people around you that you

1574
01:15:51,040 --> 01:15:53,360
Speaker 1: can trust that you can hear from the Lord and

1575
01:15:54,479 --> 01:15:57,400
Speaker 1: get into that word, because that word gonna show you.

1576
01:15:57,160 --> 01:15:59,240
Speaker 2: So that the wise counsel that you talk to anybody.

1577
01:15:59,360 --> 01:16:03,200
Speaker 1: Yes, I talked to some people in my church who

1578
01:16:03,320 --> 01:16:05,840
Speaker 1: I trust wholeheartedly, who can hear from the Lord, who

1579
01:16:05,840 --> 01:16:10,000
Speaker 1: will pray with you. And the woman that I talked to,

1580
01:16:10,240 --> 01:16:12,280
Speaker 1: she's actually the one that told me like, hey, you know,

1581
01:16:12,680 --> 01:16:15,720
Speaker 1: I feel like you need to watch this podcast. And

1582
01:16:15,800 --> 01:16:18,479
Speaker 1: at first I'm like, man, I don't watch that podcast

1583
01:16:18,520 --> 01:16:23,200
Speaker 1: so much. Why now? But there was a word in it.

1584
01:16:23,280 --> 01:16:27,519
Speaker 1: And this is why I really commend you for doing

1585
01:16:27,520 --> 01:16:31,000
Speaker 1: this podcast, for starting this and even continuing it after

1586
01:16:31,040 --> 01:16:33,960
Speaker 1: you have found your lovely bride, because there's so many

1587
01:16:34,000 --> 01:16:36,040
Speaker 1: people that need to hear it and need to hear

1588
01:16:36,080 --> 01:16:39,679
Speaker 1: these different stories, different perspectives and hear you know, you guys,

1589
01:16:39,720 --> 01:16:42,880
Speaker 1: a story and you never know how you're gonna bless

1590
01:16:42,920 --> 01:16:46,160
Speaker 1: somebody and how the Lord is going to use you.

1591
01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:50,800
Speaker 1: And so after that, I said, okay, all right, I

1592
01:16:50,880 --> 01:16:53,960
Speaker 1: accept it. The next day I'm gonna go see her,

1593
01:16:53,960 --> 01:16:56,040
Speaker 1: and I'm asking I didn't tell her that the Lord say, yes,

1594
01:16:56,080 --> 01:16:59,960
Speaker 1: I wanted to leave her in suspense, but what did

1595
01:17:00,040 --> 01:17:01,799
Speaker 1: you doing the fast? Actually, because I don't.

1596
01:17:01,640 --> 01:17:04,160
Speaker 4: Know, not fast, but.

1597
01:17:05,840 --> 01:17:06,559
Speaker 2: She already knew.

1598
01:17:07,280 --> 01:17:07,639
Speaker 4: I knew.

1599
01:17:07,720 --> 01:17:09,600
Speaker 5: So I was just like, you know, Lord, I'm a

1600
01:17:09,720 --> 01:17:12,720
Speaker 5: fast for him for him to hear you, because I

1601
01:17:12,720 --> 01:17:15,120
Speaker 5: felt like I was getting a little gas lit because

1602
01:17:15,680 --> 01:17:16,480
Speaker 5: he kept.

1603
01:17:16,240 --> 01:17:18,800
Speaker 4: Saying, I don't think it's it. I don't think it's it.

1604
01:17:18,840 --> 01:17:20,200
Speaker 5: And I was like, oh, dang, that I'm not here

1605
01:17:21,000 --> 01:17:22,920
Speaker 5: from the Lord because he kept putting in my mind

1606
01:17:23,080 --> 01:17:26,880
Speaker 5: because you know, he thought it wasn't it. And I

1607
01:17:27,000 --> 01:17:29,920
Speaker 5: was like, but I I know, I got a good

1608
01:17:29,920 --> 01:17:33,280
Speaker 5: relationship with God. So but I was like, you know,

1609
01:17:33,280 --> 01:17:35,200
Speaker 5: I'm just fast for him, and how the Lord speak

1610
01:17:35,200 --> 01:17:38,320
Speaker 5: to him and let the Lord handle it, because sometimes

1611
01:17:38,320 --> 01:17:39,040
Speaker 5: that's what you gotta do.

1612
01:17:39,680 --> 01:17:42,680
Speaker 4: And I want to say, take a son.

1613
01:17:42,520 --> 01:17:46,320
Speaker 1: And you see that's another thing about her, like how

1614
01:17:46,360 --> 01:17:49,680
Speaker 1: she handled that. Because I'm sure you can attest to this.

1615
01:17:50,439 --> 01:17:52,080
Speaker 1: You'll get women that come up to you and say,

1616
01:17:52,080 --> 01:17:57,240
Speaker 1: the Lord said that you are my husband and or

1617
01:17:57,320 --> 01:17:59,800
Speaker 1: you know, maybe you as well gotten man that said

1618
01:17:59,840 --> 01:18:02,960
Speaker 1: you and the lawyer said that you know you're my wife.

1619
01:18:03,520 --> 01:18:07,439
Speaker 1: And that's not to say that God does not tell

1620
01:18:07,520 --> 01:18:11,880
Speaker 1: people that. But notice how she went about it. She

1621
01:18:12,080 --> 01:18:15,920
Speaker 1: still allowed herself to be pursued, and she's still instead

1622
01:18:15,960 --> 01:18:19,519
Speaker 1: of saying, Okay, Lord, I'm gonna tell him, she said, no, Lord,

1623
01:18:19,560 --> 01:18:22,840
Speaker 1: I'm gonna pray and fast that you tell him, that

1624
01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:26,439
Speaker 1: you lead him, that you show him. And I said, oh,

1625
01:18:26,600 --> 01:18:31,360
Speaker 1: this is a help meet. This is a help meet.

1626
01:18:31,439 --> 01:18:34,840
Speaker 1: Someone to help me meet what you have called me

1627
01:18:34,880 --> 01:18:35,160
Speaker 1: to do.

1628
01:18:35,400 --> 01:18:35,719
Speaker 2: Facts.

1629
01:18:36,280 --> 01:18:39,400
Speaker 1: And after that, the next day I went to see

1630
01:18:39,400 --> 01:18:42,800
Speaker 1: her and the Lord was leading me because I'm driving.

1631
01:18:42,840 --> 01:18:45,000
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, she likes sunflowers. I need to go

1632
01:18:45,040 --> 01:18:47,080
Speaker 1: find some place to get a sun flower. I went

1633
01:18:47,120 --> 01:18:51,320
Speaker 1: to a couple of places and nobody had any. And

1634
01:18:51,320 --> 01:18:53,640
Speaker 1: then the Lord was like, go to this place. And

1635
01:18:53,680 --> 01:18:54,840
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, you're helping me.

1636
01:18:54,920 --> 01:18:59,639
Speaker 2: Now, you've been help you from day.

1637
01:19:00,720 --> 01:19:02,240
Speaker 1: You're helping me in a relationship.

1638
01:19:02,240 --> 01:19:03,040
Speaker 2: You woke you up.

1639
01:19:05,680 --> 01:19:08,000
Speaker 1: So I found us on flower and I told her

1640
01:19:08,080 --> 01:19:11,320
Speaker 1: and we started dating. April second.

1641
01:19:11,320 --> 01:19:12,599
Speaker 2: Second, yeah, yeah.

1642
01:19:13,040 --> 01:19:15,280
Speaker 3: Able to first, it's funny that and this is this

1643
01:19:15,360 --> 01:19:17,200
Speaker 3: is a joke that God had you because you were

1644
01:19:17,240 --> 01:19:20,880
Speaker 3: such a fool that he on April fool's.

1645
01:19:20,600 --> 01:19:25,240
Speaker 2: Day so that you could actually get a breakthrough. That's good.

1646
01:19:25,479 --> 01:19:28,759
Speaker 1: How do you think about that?

1647
01:19:31,160 --> 01:19:33,000
Speaker 3: He said, this child, I just don't know how many

1648
01:19:33,000 --> 01:19:34,280
Speaker 3: times I gotta keep showing him.

1649
01:19:35,640 --> 01:19:37,640
Speaker 2: Are you sure, Lord this food? And asked me if

1650
01:19:37,640 --> 01:19:40,640
Speaker 2: I was showing this is my selection for you, Are

1651
01:19:40,680 --> 01:19:43,160
Speaker 2: you sure how she's gonna fit into my family? Your

1652
01:19:43,160 --> 01:19:45,040
Speaker 2: mama gonna love it. I'm just trying to tell you,

1653
01:19:45,080 --> 01:19:49,960
Speaker 2: just good Lord, I'm just trying to make sure to

1654
01:19:49,960 --> 01:19:51,840
Speaker 2: make sure.

1655
01:19:52,200 --> 01:19:54,680
Speaker 3: He said, was you did you? Was you prepared for

1656
01:19:54,720 --> 01:19:57,360
Speaker 3: everything that I had for you? And that's the key.

1657
01:19:57,439 --> 01:19:59,879
Speaker 3: You hit the nail on the head. A lot of times,

1658
01:20:00,000 --> 01:20:03,640
Speaker 3: we're making preparation for what God is preparing us for.

1659
01:20:03,720 --> 01:20:06,320
Speaker 2: Anyway, at the end of the day, I tell people

1660
01:20:06,360 --> 01:20:08,880
Speaker 2: all this. I tell people this all time. No one

1661
01:20:08,880 --> 01:20:10,360
Speaker 2: could ever tell me that I was gonna have a

1662
01:20:10,400 --> 01:20:13,280
Speaker 2: podcast like this. Even when I started out doing it,

1663
01:20:13,320 --> 01:20:15,599
Speaker 2: I didn't even expect it to be everything that became.

1664
01:20:16,040 --> 01:20:18,400
Speaker 2: I just said, all I got control over is turn

1665
01:20:18,479 --> 01:20:20,200
Speaker 2: this camera on and record each episode.

1666
01:20:20,360 --> 01:20:22,479
Speaker 3: I can't control one person from watching it. At the

1667
01:20:22,479 --> 01:20:24,200
Speaker 3: beginning of this episode, do you hear me telling people

1668
01:20:24,720 --> 01:20:27,960
Speaker 3: to subscribe? Over fifty percent of the people that watch

1669
01:20:28,000 --> 01:20:30,280
Speaker 3: the podcast haven't even clicked the button to subscribe.

1670
01:20:30,320 --> 01:20:31,960
Speaker 2: I can't even control them to do that.

1671
01:20:32,200 --> 01:20:35,960
Speaker 3: And they literally watch it every every week, and I

1672
01:20:36,080 --> 01:20:38,120
Speaker 3: hear people say, you know what, I've been watching this

1673
01:20:38,160 --> 01:20:41,560
Speaker 3: for five years. I decided to I finally decide to subscribe,

1674
01:20:41,560 --> 01:20:45,439
Speaker 3: and I'm going I don't even understand the mindset of that,

1675
01:20:45,760 --> 01:20:49,959
Speaker 3: but forever reason five years they watch it every Wednesday

1676
01:20:50,000 --> 01:20:51,599
Speaker 3: and then say, let me go ahead and do that.

1677
01:20:51,800 --> 01:20:53,880
Speaker 3: Then you have some people they say they thought that

1678
01:20:53,880 --> 01:20:55,760
Speaker 3: they subscribe and they decide to, oh, let me go

1679
01:20:55,800 --> 01:20:58,000
Speaker 3: look and see if Oh I realized I didn't. But

1680
01:20:58,040 --> 01:21:00,519
Speaker 3: at the end of the day, we don't have control

1681
01:21:00,520 --> 01:21:03,840
Speaker 3: over anything. And that's what total surrender looks like. When

1682
01:21:03,880 --> 01:21:06,680
Speaker 3: you actually said God, not my will, but left I

1683
01:21:06,760 --> 01:21:10,360
Speaker 3: will be done. And then God can strategically align you

1684
01:21:11,000 --> 01:21:14,439
Speaker 3: with somebody in your life that the Bible says one

1685
01:21:14,439 --> 01:21:16,439
Speaker 3: can chase away a thousand, but two can say ten

1686
01:21:16,479 --> 01:21:19,080
Speaker 3: thousand demons. The flight you can do ten times more

1687
01:21:19,120 --> 01:21:23,520
Speaker 3: than what you could do solo. And the wealth of information,

1688
01:21:23,720 --> 01:21:29,000
Speaker 3: the grace, the spiritual foundation that Adriana has You need

1689
01:21:29,479 --> 01:21:32,240
Speaker 3: don't even realize you need it until she begins to

1690
01:21:32,320 --> 01:21:35,000
Speaker 3: just keep on just pouring that over you, Like, Wow,

1691
01:21:35,160 --> 01:21:37,280
Speaker 3: I needed that. I said, to ask it all the time.

1692
01:21:37,320 --> 01:21:39,519
Speaker 3: I sit there and I'd be like on Christmas, my

1693
01:21:40,040 --> 01:21:42,920
Speaker 3: nephew walked up to me. He said, you just seem

1694
01:21:42,960 --> 01:21:45,760
Speaker 3: so relaxed now, and I was like, well, man, how

1695
01:21:45,840 --> 01:21:46,280
Speaker 3: was I acting?

1696
01:21:47,120 --> 01:21:51,200
Speaker 2: He said, yeah, he said, you just seemed just relaxed.

1697
01:21:51,400 --> 01:21:53,479
Speaker 2: And I said, and I just looked at us and

1698
01:21:53,520 --> 01:21:56,439
Speaker 2: I said, I know. I said, I'm telling you, people

1699
01:21:56,520 --> 01:21:59,000
Speaker 2: that's been around me can tell the difference. And I said,

1700
01:21:59,040 --> 01:22:03,639
Speaker 2: I told Ashley when I propose, I feel settled without settling.

1701
01:22:04,240 --> 01:22:06,599
Speaker 2: And I said, because a lot of times people want

1702
01:22:06,600 --> 01:22:09,880
Speaker 2: to demonize the words settle, you know, and they be like, oh,

1703
01:22:09,960 --> 01:22:12,400
Speaker 2: he's just settled for her. No, I don't. I feel settled.

1704
01:22:12,400 --> 01:22:16,559
Speaker 2: My spirit is settled, my mind is settled, my family

1705
01:22:16,640 --> 01:22:20,080
Speaker 2: is settled. Everybody feels the impact of Ashley in our

1706
01:22:20,120 --> 01:22:23,479
Speaker 2: life because she set the temperature in the household where

1707
01:22:23,479 --> 01:22:25,439
Speaker 2: we're all just good. You know what I'm saying.

1708
01:22:25,760 --> 01:22:27,759
Speaker 3: And I said, that's what it's supposed to be about.

1709
01:22:27,800 --> 01:22:30,479
Speaker 3: And so that's what Adriana brings into your life. What

1710
01:22:30,560 --> 01:22:33,439
Speaker 3: does my boy Gabriel bring into your life? Why do

1711
01:22:33,479 --> 01:22:37,560
Speaker 3: you feel like God wanted you to be with him?

1712
01:22:37,920 --> 01:22:43,280
Speaker 4: That's a good question. Actually, I feel like he brings

1713
01:22:43,280 --> 01:22:44,280
Speaker 4: like a sense of security.

1714
01:22:46,040 --> 01:22:49,600
Speaker 5: He made me feel very secure with being myself and

1715
01:22:49,640 --> 01:22:52,719
Speaker 5: we will talked about this a lot. There's always different

1716
01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:55,679
Speaker 5: versions of me that everybody gets, but he gets literally

1717
01:22:55,840 --> 01:22:58,720
Speaker 5: all of them. And so I'm like, I thanked him

1718
01:22:58,800 --> 01:23:05,800
Speaker 5: for allowing me to be fully me. Well also like

1719
01:23:05,960 --> 01:23:07,559
Speaker 5: opening his heart too for.

1720
01:23:07,479 --> 01:23:08,000
Speaker 4: Me to do that.

1721
01:23:09,280 --> 01:23:13,360
Speaker 5: And he also brings in a lot of biblical wisdom,

1722
01:23:13,400 --> 01:23:16,280
Speaker 5: Like you know, I know the Bible, but when we

1723
01:23:16,320 --> 01:23:19,439
Speaker 5: study the Bible together, it opens my mind to a

1724
01:23:19,479 --> 01:23:22,040
Speaker 5: whole nother way. And so I think that's like a

1725
01:23:22,120 --> 01:23:25,080
Speaker 5: nice intimate time. I feel like with your partner reading

1726
01:23:25,120 --> 01:23:26,120
Speaker 5: the Bible, So that's awesome.

1727
01:23:26,680 --> 01:23:29,320
Speaker 3: Did you ever have anybody say like, y'all too young

1728
01:23:29,360 --> 01:23:29,880
Speaker 3: to get married?

1729
01:23:31,600 --> 01:23:33,280
Speaker 1: Not too young? Too fast?

1730
01:23:33,760 --> 01:23:34,040
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1731
01:23:34,080 --> 01:23:37,920
Speaker 3: Why too fast? So y'all so April the second y'all

1732
01:23:37,960 --> 01:23:41,200
Speaker 3: locked in. That was in twenty twenty four, right, twenty

1733
01:23:41,200 --> 01:23:45,840
Speaker 3: twenty five, and then by December the twenty first, he said,

1734
01:23:45,960 --> 01:23:46,920
Speaker 3: twenty first I got engaged.

1735
01:23:46,960 --> 01:23:47,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, yep, yep.

1736
01:23:48,439 --> 01:23:50,160
Speaker 2: I think it's they said it's too fast.

1737
01:23:50,160 --> 01:23:53,519
Speaker 5: Why I think personally it's because they don't know how

1738
01:23:53,520 --> 01:23:56,600
Speaker 5: it unfolded. Like we kind of were very private with

1739
01:23:56,720 --> 01:23:59,639
Speaker 5: our dating. So when we finally came out and told people,

1740
01:23:59,680 --> 01:24:02,519
Speaker 5: it was at the end of our dating and at

1741
01:24:02,560 --> 01:24:04,600
Speaker 5: the beginning of when we're about to get engaged, and

1742
01:24:04,640 --> 01:24:06,479
Speaker 5: everyby was like, what would.

1743
01:24:06,240 --> 01:24:06,679
Speaker 4: Have been there?

1744
01:24:07,000 --> 01:24:10,080
Speaker 5: Yeah, And so to them it felt like this y'all

1745
01:24:10,120 --> 01:24:12,479
Speaker 5: just got together, but to us, it's it's been a

1746
01:24:12,520 --> 01:24:13,200
Speaker 5: time coming.

1747
01:24:13,520 --> 01:24:18,800
Speaker 1: Yeah. And we we started dating April second, probably by October,

1748
01:24:19,240 --> 01:24:23,240
Speaker 1: the Lord revealed, like, y'all need to get married, set

1749
01:24:23,240 --> 01:24:26,519
Speaker 1: a date for twenty twenty six, and me, I would

1750
01:24:26,720 --> 01:24:30,960
Speaker 1: rather I was watching the episode with Joshua, Yeah, and

1751
01:24:31,000 --> 01:24:34,040
Speaker 1: I felt what he was saying, you'd rather wait to

1752
01:24:34,120 --> 01:24:37,640
Speaker 1: your coins is all in order, and so that's what

1753
01:24:37,760 --> 01:24:40,800
Speaker 1: that was my goal. And Low was like, nah, nah Son,

1754
01:24:41,560 --> 01:24:44,360
Speaker 1: you need to go ahead and get married and propose

1755
01:24:44,439 --> 01:24:48,479
Speaker 1: to this woman. And I did. I the Lord blessed

1756
01:24:48,520 --> 01:24:51,160
Speaker 1: me now because I after he said that, I said, Lord, okay,

1757
01:24:52,080 --> 01:24:55,280
Speaker 1: provide these finances because rings ain't cheap at all. These

1758
01:24:55,360 --> 01:24:57,200
Speaker 1: rings are not cheap. And the ring that she wanted,

1759
01:24:57,200 --> 01:25:01,280
Speaker 1: which is on her fingernaut, it wasn't she and so

1760
01:25:01,479 --> 01:25:04,880
Speaker 1: but the Lord blessed and provided, and so we got

1761
01:25:04,920 --> 01:25:09,000
Speaker 1: engaged in December of twenty twenty five, and you know

1762
01:25:09,120 --> 01:25:11,200
Speaker 1: we're supposed to get married. We're going to get married

1763
01:25:11,200 --> 01:25:13,439
Speaker 1: this year. And so some people are like, you know,

1764
01:25:13,520 --> 01:25:16,000
Speaker 1: you should wait a little longer. You know, wait, you

1765
01:25:16,240 --> 01:25:20,880
Speaker 1: ask them why, they say that, No, but I know why. Wow,

1766
01:25:21,720 --> 01:25:25,479
Speaker 1: they would prefer that I was in a higher position

1767
01:25:25,600 --> 01:25:26,799
Speaker 1: financially or.

1768
01:25:26,680 --> 01:25:28,000
Speaker 2: That we they would prefer.

1769
01:25:28,160 --> 01:25:32,160
Speaker 1: They would prefer, society would prefer. But also they can't

1770
01:25:32,200 --> 01:25:35,400
Speaker 1: see what God is doing. Yeah, they can't. They can't

1771
01:25:35,439 --> 01:25:37,639
Speaker 1: see what God is doing in us. They can't see

1772
01:25:37,920 --> 01:25:42,000
Speaker 1: what God has already prepared. Like I had a moment

1773
01:25:42,040 --> 01:25:44,320
Speaker 1: where I was worried. I'm seeking. I'm like, Lord, you

1774
01:25:44,320 --> 01:25:46,639
Speaker 1: know I need you to help me get these get

1775
01:25:46,680 --> 01:25:49,400
Speaker 1: this money together. I'm like, Lord, I'm gonna get married.

1776
01:25:49,439 --> 01:25:50,880
Speaker 1: He's like, boy, you don't think I know.

1777
01:25:51,400 --> 01:25:53,360
Speaker 2: That's why I trying to tell people that you're.

1778
01:25:53,240 --> 01:25:55,760
Speaker 1: About to get You think I would tell you to

1779
01:25:55,760 --> 01:25:58,320
Speaker 1: get married and not provide for you to be married.

1780
01:25:59,240 --> 01:26:01,360
Speaker 1: Who do you think I am?

1781
01:26:01,200 --> 01:26:04,320
Speaker 3: I'm oh, your little faith. When I tell you it's

1782
01:26:04,840 --> 01:26:07,280
Speaker 3: you're hitting the nail on the head. Because we keep

1783
01:26:07,479 --> 01:26:12,000
Speaker 3: trying to be God so often we try to be God.

1784
01:26:12,200 --> 01:26:15,479
Speaker 3: And I'm telling you, I'm telling you as sure as

1785
01:26:15,520 --> 01:26:18,800
Speaker 3: I sit here right now. Just got married November the

1786
01:26:18,840 --> 01:26:21,960
Speaker 3: twenty second of twenty twenty five. I didn't know I'm

1787
01:26:22,000 --> 01:26:26,400
Speaker 3: talking about from March to eighteenth. I didn't know our

1788
01:26:26,479 --> 01:26:28,400
Speaker 3: prophesied the year before that I'll be married by the

1789
01:26:28,479 --> 01:26:29,320
Speaker 3: end of twenty twenty five.

1790
01:26:29,360 --> 01:26:31,400
Speaker 2: Didn't know how it was gonna happen, didn't know where

1791
01:26:31,439 --> 01:26:33,599
Speaker 2: it's going to be. I'm talking about why we started

1792
01:26:33,680 --> 01:26:38,320
Speaker 2: dating each other. It pivoted from me wanting our wedding

1793
01:26:38,360 --> 01:26:41,920
Speaker 2: to be in Dallas to her saying I wanted in La.

1794
01:26:42,360 --> 01:26:44,600
Speaker 2: I said, La costs so much money, Lord, how do

1795
01:26:44,720 --> 01:26:46,160
Speaker 2: we gonna do this? It was in La.

1796
01:26:46,560 --> 01:26:49,680
Speaker 3: It was at Warren Campbell and Erica Campbell's church on

1797
01:26:49,840 --> 01:26:53,639
Speaker 3: Caloun Worship, the place that we first met. So it's

1798
01:26:53,680 --> 01:26:55,920
Speaker 3: like all we didn't even I'm talking about all the

1799
01:26:55,960 --> 01:26:59,160
Speaker 3: way down to the venue, the venue that we originally

1800
01:26:59,240 --> 01:27:01,960
Speaker 3: had that well we didn't have. I was like, this

1801
01:27:02,080 --> 01:27:04,240
Speaker 3: is cheaper, We're gonna go do it here. She was like,

1802
01:27:04,640 --> 01:27:06,800
Speaker 3: my heart ain't really said on that, didn't tell me that.

1803
01:27:06,960 --> 01:27:09,360
Speaker 3: Then she go see this other venue. She's like this

1804
01:27:09,400 --> 01:27:10,920
Speaker 3: is the venue, she said them to me. I said,

1805
01:27:10,960 --> 01:27:12,400
Speaker 3: this place is beautiful.

1806
01:27:12,840 --> 01:27:16,400
Speaker 2: Oh my God, And I said, we're gonna have to

1807
01:27:16,400 --> 01:27:17,880
Speaker 2: make it happen. You know what I'm saying.

1808
01:27:18,200 --> 01:27:22,559
Speaker 3: But I'm talking about every detail the week before, the

1809
01:27:22,640 --> 01:27:25,080
Speaker 3: day before, I didn't even know, like every little detail

1810
01:27:25,120 --> 01:27:25,799
Speaker 3: that happens.

1811
01:27:26,600 --> 01:27:29,000
Speaker 2: God is saying, just trust me in it. I'm talking

1812
01:27:29,000 --> 01:27:33,920
Speaker 2: about every single detail from March to eighteen. When I

1813
01:27:33,960 --> 01:27:36,160
Speaker 2: went on the first date with her, I would have

1814
01:27:36,280 --> 01:27:40,080
Speaker 2: never even suspected we would be getting married on November

1815
01:27:40,120 --> 01:27:42,639
Speaker 2: the twenty second of twenty five. I just I just

1816
01:27:42,960 --> 01:27:44,680
Speaker 2: there's no way I wouldn't know where it was. I

1817
01:27:44,720 --> 01:27:45,120
Speaker 2: would to know.

1818
01:27:45,200 --> 01:27:47,120
Speaker 3: I just you just don't know. And that's what I

1819
01:27:47,240 --> 01:27:50,200
Speaker 3: told That's what I always told her. I said, I

1820
01:27:50,280 --> 01:27:52,679
Speaker 3: just submit to the season. Just whatever. God is gonna

1821
01:27:52,680 --> 01:27:56,280
Speaker 3: do whatever. And the problem with men is because where

1822
01:27:56,800 --> 01:28:01,360
Speaker 3: we try to be such planners that we act plan.

1823
01:28:01,280 --> 01:28:02,120
Speaker 2: God out of it.

1824
01:28:02,200 --> 01:28:04,559
Speaker 3: Come on, because you go, well, I know I got

1825
01:28:04,600 --> 01:28:06,240
Speaker 3: to do this, I gotta do that, and God's like,

1826
01:28:07,200 --> 01:28:10,519
Speaker 3: hello here, I am no, no, I got this because

1827
01:28:10,560 --> 01:28:12,080
Speaker 3: I gotta do this. I gotta do that. I I

1828
01:28:13,240 --> 01:28:18,720
Speaker 3: I which is bad because you're not even allowing your wife.

1829
01:28:18,680 --> 01:28:21,040
Speaker 2: To actually speak into that. You're like, I got this,

1830
01:28:21,720 --> 01:28:22,360
Speaker 2: I gotta do.

1831
01:28:22,360 --> 01:28:25,559
Speaker 3: This, and she's like, but I'm your helpmate, let me

1832
01:28:25,600 --> 01:28:28,640
Speaker 3: know where you need help at. Now, I gotta do this,

1833
01:28:28,720 --> 01:28:31,600
Speaker 3: And it's like you're already shutting her out of the

1834
01:28:31,600 --> 01:28:35,000
Speaker 3: most important season. When y'all, every moment you get a

1835
01:28:35,080 --> 01:28:38,559
Speaker 3: chance to spend with your woman that God has placed

1836
01:28:38,560 --> 01:28:42,479
Speaker 3: in your life, it's an unveiling of why she's in

1837
01:28:42,560 --> 01:28:45,600
Speaker 3: your life, and every step of it shows that, it

1838
01:28:45,680 --> 01:28:49,000
Speaker 3: confirms it. And if you push her out of that process,

1839
01:28:49,439 --> 01:28:53,679
Speaker 3: then you forego the opportunity to learn why God allowed

1840
01:28:53,680 --> 01:28:56,000
Speaker 3: her to be in your life. And every single season,

1841
01:28:56,040 --> 01:28:59,200
Speaker 3: every step of the way, I'm talking about every step

1842
01:28:59,200 --> 01:29:02,280
Speaker 3: of the way. I've shared this before in the podcast.

1843
01:29:02,560 --> 01:29:07,960
Speaker 3: My nephew who I adopted, Ashley, came and visited one day,

1844
01:29:08,280 --> 01:29:10,040
Speaker 3: and my nephew don't talk to a.

1845
01:29:09,960 --> 01:29:10,439
Speaker 2: Lot of people.

1846
01:29:10,479 --> 01:29:12,840
Speaker 3: He not real cool with, you know, with adults like that.

1847
01:29:12,960 --> 01:29:15,920
Speaker 3: He hang around kids, he's cool with that, but he

1848
01:29:15,960 --> 01:29:17,760
Speaker 3: ain't gonna tell nobody he loved them. I mean, he

1849
01:29:17,800 --> 01:29:21,080
Speaker 3: was in foster care. I've been open about this. My

1850
01:29:21,120 --> 01:29:23,240
Speaker 3: sister's on drugs where he got put in foster care.

1851
01:29:23,400 --> 01:29:28,599
Speaker 3: So his relationship with women a little strange, especially adults.

1852
01:29:28,640 --> 01:29:30,080
Speaker 3: And I don't really trust him like that. He even

1853
01:29:30,120 --> 01:29:32,479
Speaker 3: said that to asked was talking. He said, y'all don't

1854
01:29:32,479 --> 01:29:34,679
Speaker 3: really trust people like that. He said that, he said,

1855
01:29:34,720 --> 01:29:36,519
Speaker 3: you can't. I said why, He said, because people switch

1856
01:29:36,600 --> 01:29:39,800
Speaker 3: up on you. So I was like, cool, this young

1857
01:29:39,880 --> 01:29:43,800
Speaker 3: man told Ashley when she visited one day, he was like,

1858
01:29:43,960 --> 01:29:47,080
Speaker 3: I love you. It sent me into my bedroom. I

1859
01:29:47,120 --> 01:29:49,360
Speaker 3: got on my knees and just started crying and said, God,

1860
01:29:49,800 --> 01:29:51,720
Speaker 3: like you you dope like that.

1861
01:29:51,800 --> 01:29:53,800
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. But it was also a

1862
01:29:53,840 --> 01:29:56,240
Speaker 2: moment prior to that, the week before, where she said

1863
01:29:56,720 --> 01:29:58,599
Speaker 2: I left and I didn't get a chance to see

1864
01:29:58,600 --> 01:30:00,960
Speaker 2: his face before I left, up in this room like

1865
01:30:01,000 --> 01:30:04,719
Speaker 2: teenagers do all day, and she said, I felt guilty

1866
01:30:04,720 --> 01:30:05,280
Speaker 2: that I can get.

1867
01:30:05,160 --> 01:30:07,200
Speaker 3: A chance to see him. I said, gang, that's serious,

1868
01:30:07,200 --> 01:30:09,400
Speaker 3: that's how teenagers all that. She said, that's not gonna

1869
01:30:09,400 --> 01:30:10,400
Speaker 3: be what it is in this house.

1870
01:30:10,880 --> 01:30:12,240
Speaker 4: He said right now.

1871
01:30:12,360 --> 01:30:13,599
Speaker 2: I said, I you want to talk to him, talk?

1872
01:30:13,720 --> 01:30:15,720
Speaker 3: I said, you whatever you want to do, you got

1873
01:30:15,880 --> 01:30:17,360
Speaker 3: full reign and authority to.

1874
01:30:17,360 --> 01:30:19,960
Speaker 2: Do you do you? This is your home?

1875
01:30:20,120 --> 01:30:20,519
Speaker 6: Do you?

1876
01:30:21,120 --> 01:30:24,080
Speaker 3: But the reality I say all that because there were

1877
01:30:24,120 --> 01:30:26,280
Speaker 3: certain things that I didn't.

1878
01:30:26,520 --> 01:30:27,240
Speaker 2: I couldn't.

1879
01:30:27,280 --> 01:30:30,400
Speaker 3: There's no way I could conceive it or even perceive

1880
01:30:30,960 --> 01:30:33,560
Speaker 3: the level of healing that she would.

1881
01:30:34,680 --> 01:30:37,280
Speaker 2: Be a part of in my nephew's life. But me

1882
01:30:37,400 --> 01:30:40,280
Speaker 2: acquiescing to it and saying, hey, go ahead, do you

1883
01:30:40,720 --> 01:30:43,120
Speaker 2: then allowed her to show up in her full glory

1884
01:30:43,520 --> 01:30:45,960
Speaker 2: to heal what she didn't wound.

1885
01:30:46,479 --> 01:30:47,680
Speaker 1: Man, that's good.

1886
01:30:47,800 --> 01:30:48,000
Speaker 2: Good.

1887
01:30:49,120 --> 01:30:52,360
Speaker 3: So what I'm telling you now is that finances is

1888
01:30:52,400 --> 01:30:56,719
Speaker 3: the biggest thing that most men say that hinders them

1889
01:30:57,160 --> 01:31:02,200
Speaker 3: from taking a godly step, a godly commitment, a godly covenant,

1890
01:31:02,520 --> 01:31:03,439
Speaker 3: because of money.

1891
01:31:04,000 --> 01:31:06,719
Speaker 2: And it's like, God, be like, that's manna. He calls

1892
01:31:06,720 --> 01:31:09,240
Speaker 2: it manna. It's like, what is that?

1893
01:31:10,120 --> 01:31:11,640
Speaker 3: When the Bible says the love of money is the

1894
01:31:11,720 --> 01:31:14,400
Speaker 3: root of all evil, the reality of it is because

1895
01:31:14,439 --> 01:31:17,960
Speaker 3: if I love the access of money more than I

1896
01:31:18,000 --> 01:31:22,080
Speaker 3: love the covenant of marriage, then I will put money

1897
01:31:22,320 --> 01:31:24,759
Speaker 3: as the as the gate that.

1898
01:31:24,680 --> 01:31:26,559
Speaker 2: Prevents me from actually getting married.

1899
01:31:26,600 --> 01:31:30,040
Speaker 3: And God says, but I can change that in a day,

1900
01:31:29,760 --> 01:31:32,519
Speaker 3: And he can change you. When you came in here

1901
01:31:32,520 --> 01:31:34,519
Speaker 3: and you said, dang this, I see the elevation. You

1902
01:31:34,560 --> 01:31:36,240
Speaker 3: got a whole new set and all this stuff. I

1903
01:31:36,320 --> 01:31:37,800
Speaker 3: didn't even know I was gonna be spending this kind

1904
01:31:37,840 --> 01:31:40,439
Speaker 3: of money on the set the couple of weeks after

1905
01:31:40,479 --> 01:31:43,360
Speaker 3: getting married. But I just said, this is a new season.

1906
01:31:43,400 --> 01:31:45,479
Speaker 3: I want the new season to look different. And I said,

1907
01:31:45,520 --> 01:31:48,519
Speaker 3: I'm about to spit. Oh man, I ain't man.

1908
01:31:48,800 --> 01:31:52,639
Speaker 1: Come on, doc, come on, doc. You know the Lord

1909
01:31:52,640 --> 01:31:53,920
Speaker 1: will also hold on.

1910
01:31:53,920 --> 01:31:55,800
Speaker 3: I gotta tell you this because I wasn't gonna say this.

1911
01:31:56,160 --> 01:31:58,400
Speaker 3: The situation happened just like this. I need the money

1912
01:31:58,439 --> 01:32:01,880
Speaker 3: for the set. I talked to a business partners and

1913
01:32:01,920 --> 01:32:04,559
Speaker 3: I said, hey, listen, I need the money against future

1914
01:32:04,600 --> 01:32:07,639
Speaker 3: earnings of the podcast. I need this money for this set.

1915
01:32:08,040 --> 01:32:10,880
Speaker 3: Thirty thousand dollars, I said. And it was like, well,

1916
01:32:10,960 --> 01:32:12,519
Speaker 3: now we can't really do that right now, we can't

1917
01:32:12,520 --> 01:32:15,479
Speaker 3: do this. I said, all right, cool, So god, you

1918
01:32:15,520 --> 01:32:17,800
Speaker 3: know I want this set. I want this set. It's

1919
01:32:17,800 --> 01:32:22,400
Speaker 3: gonna cost thirty thousand dollars, asked, can sit here? And

1920
01:32:22,439 --> 01:32:25,639
Speaker 3: she is a witness. The next day, I get a call.

1921
01:32:27,479 --> 01:32:30,000
Speaker 3: A brand deal came through that said hey, can you

1922
01:32:30,040 --> 01:32:32,000
Speaker 3: come and shoot this for us real quick? And they

1923
01:32:32,040 --> 01:32:33,400
Speaker 3: said how much you want to get paid? I said

1924
01:32:33,400 --> 01:32:35,919
Speaker 3: thirty thousand dollars. They said, Okay, cool, I said, Jesus,

1925
01:32:36,000 --> 01:32:36,920
Speaker 3: look at Lord.

1926
01:32:37,080 --> 01:32:40,759
Speaker 2: When I say the next day glory, yep in my line,

1927
01:32:41,520 --> 01:32:46,360
Speaker 2: the next day glory. When I tell you, the Bible says,

1928
01:32:46,400 --> 01:32:50,240
Speaker 2: I pray that your faith fails. Not what I'm telling

1929
01:32:50,280 --> 01:32:53,720
Speaker 2: you right now, Gabriel, is that everything that you desire

1930
01:32:54,520 --> 01:32:57,960
Speaker 2: is behind the veil. That the minute that you decide

1931
01:32:58,000 --> 01:33:00,479
Speaker 2: to truly commit get married, and you say, hey, God,

1932
01:33:00,960 --> 01:33:03,679
Speaker 2: you're the guy that owns the cattle on a thousand hills.

1933
01:33:04,720 --> 01:33:06,720
Speaker 2: Your plans are to cross me, to give me a

1934
01:33:06,720 --> 01:33:08,360
Speaker 2: great future, to give me a great reward.

1935
01:33:08,720 --> 01:33:12,040
Speaker 3: That's just money. I've had tons of money. I've lost

1936
01:33:12,080 --> 01:33:14,160
Speaker 3: a lot of money. But the Bible says I've never

1937
01:33:14,200 --> 01:33:16,679
Speaker 3: seen the righteous forsaken, nor they're sea begging for bread.

1938
01:33:16,760 --> 01:33:19,280
Speaker 3: What I'm telling you right now, man, a guy that

1939
01:33:19,360 --> 01:33:21,360
Speaker 3: when you keep the main thing, the main thing, and

1940
01:33:21,400 --> 01:33:24,360
Speaker 3: that's covenant and honoring your wife and covering her properly

1941
01:33:24,400 --> 01:33:28,679
Speaker 3: and allowing her wisdom and her grace and her glory

1942
01:33:28,720 --> 01:33:34,040
Speaker 3: to speak into your life, there's nothing that you want

1943
01:33:34,520 --> 01:33:37,679
Speaker 3: that you cannot have because there's power and covenant.

1944
01:33:37,680 --> 01:33:39,439
Speaker 2: There's power in unity.

1945
01:33:39,720 --> 01:33:42,880
Speaker 3: And I'm telling you, and I'm glad what you don't know, Adrianna,

1946
01:33:42,960 --> 01:33:44,719
Speaker 3: is that I even told him when we were first talking,

1947
01:33:44,760 --> 01:33:46,720
Speaker 3: I said, I would love for you to propose to

1948
01:33:46,760 --> 01:33:49,320
Speaker 3: your woman on the podcast. Since he was talking about

1949
01:33:49,360 --> 01:33:52,720
Speaker 3: the impact of the podcast, he tell you that, did

1950
01:33:52,720 --> 01:33:53,160
Speaker 3: you tell him that?

1951
01:33:55,120 --> 01:33:55,240
Speaker 1: No?

1952
01:33:55,280 --> 01:33:56,920
Speaker 4: And I don't think so. I know he was saying

1953
01:33:56,920 --> 01:33:58,800
Speaker 4: that you got someone to repose, No.

1954
01:33:59,560 --> 01:34:02,400
Speaker 3: Someone you because there ain't been nobody did it on

1955
01:34:02,479 --> 01:34:03,240
Speaker 3: this yellow couch.

1956
01:34:03,439 --> 01:34:06,000
Speaker 2: But that's that's what That's what I was telling him

1957
01:34:06,000 --> 01:34:07,400
Speaker 2: to do. He's like, man, I want to marry her,

1958
01:34:07,439 --> 01:34:09,320
Speaker 2: but you know, goda get the ring. I gotta do this.

1959
01:34:09,439 --> 01:34:11,240
Speaker 3: And I know the pressure that men have when they

1960
01:34:11,280 --> 01:34:13,280
Speaker 3: when they deal with that or whatnot. And I just

1961
01:34:13,320 --> 01:34:16,439
Speaker 3: be sitting there like, man, that's the easiest trick for

1962
01:34:16,520 --> 01:34:19,599
Speaker 3: the devil is to prevent the proposal take place because

1963
01:34:19,640 --> 01:34:20,040
Speaker 3: of a ring.

1964
01:34:20,200 --> 01:34:24,080
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the

1965
01:34:24,080 --> 01:34:28,519
Speaker 1: beautiful thing about God is like I'm seeing scriptures live

1966
01:34:28,960 --> 01:34:31,360
Speaker 1: lived out in real time. Absolutely Bible says that here

1967
01:34:31,439 --> 01:34:33,439
Speaker 1: finding the wife, find a good thing, and obtained favor,

1968
01:34:33,920 --> 01:34:37,679
Speaker 1: the favor I haven't even said the guy dos yet, yes,

1969
01:34:37,720 --> 01:34:41,040
Speaker 1: but the favor that I have gotten since making the

1970
01:34:41,040 --> 01:34:44,519
Speaker 1: commitment that I was going to marry this woman. I

1971
01:34:44,560 --> 01:34:48,920
Speaker 1: was seeking the Lord in January and I'm like, Lord, okay,

1972
01:34:49,400 --> 01:34:52,160
Speaker 1: it's we need to start doing things. I need to

1973
01:34:52,160 --> 01:34:54,920
Speaker 1: start making things happen. I'm seeking them on fasting for

1974
01:34:54,960 --> 01:34:57,920
Speaker 1: three days, and at the end of the fast, the

1975
01:34:57,920 --> 01:34:59,519
Speaker 1: Lord is like, all right, you're ready to hear the plans.

1976
01:35:00,320 --> 01:35:03,120
Speaker 1: I said, get my notepath. What do you need me

1977
01:35:03,160 --> 01:35:05,360
Speaker 1: to do? He said. He gave me a couple of

1978
01:35:05,400 --> 01:35:07,000
Speaker 1: things to write. One of the things he said was,

1979
01:35:07,040 --> 01:35:09,360
Speaker 1: dear future wife here in March. I said, Lord, I

1980
01:35:09,360 --> 01:35:11,679
Speaker 1: didn't even talk to him, you know, in March. I

1981
01:35:11,720 --> 01:35:15,200
Speaker 1: haven't even given him a date or anything. I don't

1982
01:35:15,240 --> 01:35:17,160
Speaker 1: know if this is if this is how this is

1983
01:35:17,160 --> 01:35:19,439
Speaker 1: gonna work, he said, dear for his wife in March.

1984
01:35:19,479 --> 01:35:22,720
Speaker 1: I was like, okay, all right. And so I had

1985
01:35:22,760 --> 01:35:25,040
Speaker 1: reached out to you, and then I had said, hey,

1986
01:35:25,360 --> 01:35:27,360
Speaker 1: we can come in March. I didn't know if he

1987
01:35:27,439 --> 01:35:29,160
Speaker 1: was going to say yes. I didn't know if you

1988
01:35:29,439 --> 01:35:33,439
Speaker 1: had already had engagements, you had your people lined up,

1989
01:35:33,880 --> 01:35:37,400
Speaker 1: and I just didn't know. But I had to step

1990
01:35:37,439 --> 01:35:42,160
Speaker 1: out in faith and trust God and march. We're here

1991
01:35:42,240 --> 01:35:46,680
Speaker 1: now in March. March, and just thirteen March to thirteenth

1992
01:35:46,720 --> 01:35:50,000
Speaker 1: and the favorite that the Lord will bestow upon you

1993
01:35:50,080 --> 01:35:53,760
Speaker 1: from making that commitment to that covenant and fellas, he's

1994
01:35:53,840 --> 01:35:57,679
Speaker 1: going to bless that covenant. He is not going to

1995
01:35:57,920 --> 01:36:03,160
Speaker 1: leave you hanging financially. He is going to give you provisions.

1996
01:36:03,360 --> 01:36:07,280
Speaker 1: Do not be don't get so frustrated that you get

1997
01:36:07,280 --> 01:36:10,880
Speaker 1: out of faith. Don't get so frustrated that you get

1998
01:36:10,920 --> 01:36:13,120
Speaker 1: out of faith. You have to believe. And the other

1999
01:36:13,160 --> 01:36:16,080
Speaker 1: thing that you were talking about, you know with taking

2000
01:36:16,080 --> 01:36:17,880
Speaker 1: the reins off and letting her handle you know, with

2001
01:36:17,920 --> 01:36:22,360
Speaker 1: your nephew and everything, you gotta let your woman help you.

2002
01:36:22,520 --> 01:36:25,760
Speaker 1: Facts you got it. I struggle with that, and our

2003
01:36:25,840 --> 01:36:29,960
Speaker 1: relationship was just like letting her help me like I

2004
01:36:30,120 --> 01:36:31,800
Speaker 1: was so used to. Like now I figured it out.

2005
01:36:31,880 --> 01:36:34,840
Speaker 1: I got it. I can do it. And even when

2006
01:36:34,840 --> 01:36:36,600
Speaker 1: getting a relationship, it's like, no, I want to show it.

2007
01:36:36,640 --> 01:36:37,040
Speaker 2: I'm a man.

2008
01:36:37,080 --> 01:36:40,200
Speaker 1: I can handle things. I got it. And the Lord

2009
01:36:40,280 --> 01:36:43,240
Speaker 1: had to tell you one day, gave why are you

2010
01:36:43,360 --> 01:36:49,200
Speaker 1: not letting the woman I gave you help you? But no,

2011
01:36:49,320 --> 01:36:52,920
Speaker 1: it's me and you. No, it's y'all and me. Yeah,

2012
01:36:53,800 --> 01:36:57,400
Speaker 1: it's you two in me. So go to the woman

2013
01:36:57,760 --> 01:36:59,880
Speaker 1: he had to tell you one day, you know what,

2014
01:37:00,080 --> 01:37:01,120
Speaker 1: talk to her too, right.

2015
01:37:02,720 --> 01:37:04,759
Speaker 5: There is literally there is a time in the beginning

2016
01:37:05,280 --> 01:37:07,080
Speaker 5: I will be he'll tell me something, I'm like, oh,

2017
01:37:07,120 --> 01:37:08,800
Speaker 5: you should do this instead, though I think that will

2018
01:37:08,880 --> 01:37:09,519
Speaker 5: work out better.

2019
01:37:12,240 --> 01:37:14,120
Speaker 4: And then like days later, you.

2020
01:37:14,080 --> 01:37:18,080
Speaker 5: Know, somebody told me the same exact thing I would say,

2021
01:37:18,120 --> 01:37:19,720
Speaker 5: and then it'll move on from that too.

2022
01:37:20,479 --> 01:37:24,760
Speaker 4: You know, you're kind of right, yeah, hey, what you

2023
01:37:24,840 --> 01:37:25,559
Speaker 4: said was good.

2024
01:37:25,800 --> 01:37:29,240
Speaker 5: Yeah. Two weeks I'm like, yeah, I told you that,

2025
01:37:30,560 --> 01:37:33,120
Speaker 5: and now it's like, okay, he said, so.

2026
01:37:33,200 --> 01:37:34,920
Speaker 4: I'm gonna listen to you. And then he'll be like,

2027
01:37:35,640 --> 01:37:37,080
Speaker 4: huh it.

2028
01:37:36,960 --> 01:37:40,519
Speaker 5: Worked out Like I see, like I see things from

2029
01:37:40,520 --> 01:37:45,000
Speaker 5: a different perspective than him, so he'll have his view

2030
01:37:45,200 --> 01:37:46,800
Speaker 5: and then I see it from the outside of what

2031
01:37:46,920 --> 01:37:49,320
Speaker 5: he's seeing. And I'm like, well, let me just now,

2032
01:37:49,439 --> 01:37:50,840
Speaker 5: I say, let me submit this to you.

2033
01:37:51,360 --> 01:37:53,040
Speaker 1: I'm like, you don't have to let me submit.

2034
01:37:53,120 --> 01:37:53,880
Speaker 4: You don't have to take the.

2035
01:37:53,880 --> 01:37:56,840
Speaker 5: Paper, but I'm a I'm ana submit it, see if

2036
01:37:56,880 --> 01:37:59,200
Speaker 5: you you know. And then but I do.

2037
01:37:59,200 --> 01:38:02,280
Speaker 4: Have some strong suggested things.

2038
01:38:02,600 --> 01:38:03,720
Speaker 1: Yeah she does.

2039
01:38:05,080 --> 01:38:09,559
Speaker 4: Don't say no, one, just trust me. Yeah. So that's

2040
01:38:09,600 --> 01:38:12,120
Speaker 4: great that the Lord's been working on him in that too.

2041
01:38:12,920 --> 01:38:14,360
Speaker 2: And I'm gonna tell you it's not just him, as

2042
01:38:14,439 --> 01:38:17,439
Speaker 2: men in general, most men will not. I'm telling you

2043
01:38:17,800 --> 01:38:20,840
Speaker 2: the thing we need to unlearn is this. Most men

2044
01:38:21,120 --> 01:38:24,479
Speaker 2: believe that a woman can't help him. He can't she

2045
01:38:25,080 --> 01:38:26,320
Speaker 2: like I'm the leader.

2046
01:38:26,640 --> 01:38:29,960
Speaker 3: You submit, and we think submission is We have this

2047
01:38:30,080 --> 01:38:33,680
Speaker 3: toxic ideology of submission. We don't even go into the

2048
01:38:33,680 --> 01:38:36,760
Speaker 3: scripture that says submit you one to another. We just

2049
01:38:36,800 --> 01:38:39,320
Speaker 3: always listen to wife, submit to your husband. And we

2050
01:38:39,400 --> 01:38:43,559
Speaker 3: stopped there. I told Ashley all day, I was like, listen,

2051
01:38:43,800 --> 01:38:46,080
Speaker 3: you better with finance, you better with planning, you do

2052
01:38:46,120 --> 01:38:46,439
Speaker 3: all that?

2053
01:38:46,560 --> 01:38:50,960
Speaker 2: I submit that you like, go do that? Do you like?

2054
01:38:51,160 --> 01:38:53,240
Speaker 2: Just do you? Because that's what you're great at.

2055
01:38:53,600 --> 01:38:55,160
Speaker 3: But if I had an ego, I'd be like, now

2056
01:38:55,600 --> 01:38:57,640
Speaker 3: I'm gonna learn it better than you did, so that

2057
01:38:57,680 --> 01:39:00,400
Speaker 3: you can Why why it's not my that's not the

2058
01:39:00,479 --> 01:39:04,320
Speaker 3: skill set And the reality is that again, both men

2059
01:39:04,400 --> 01:39:07,680
Speaker 3: are programmed to do that instead of saying, now, I

2060
01:39:07,800 --> 01:39:11,000
Speaker 3: chose you like no one on a football team because

2061
01:39:11,000 --> 01:39:11,799
Speaker 3: she loves football.

2062
01:39:12,080 --> 01:39:16,280
Speaker 2: No one on a football team, yeah she no?

2063
01:39:16,920 --> 01:39:17,240
Speaker 1: Oh?

2064
01:39:17,560 --> 01:39:21,760
Speaker 4: I like the forty nine ers. Yeah. I grew up

2065
01:39:21,760 --> 01:39:22,880
Speaker 4: in LA we didn't have a.

2066
01:39:22,840 --> 01:39:28,800
Speaker 2: Team you're gonna start something with Yeah, you start talking

2067
01:39:28,800 --> 01:39:30,680
Speaker 2: about that, you're gonna start something. So, so what the

2068
01:39:30,720 --> 01:39:31,479
Speaker 2: reality is this?

2069
01:39:33,200 --> 01:39:36,120
Speaker 3: The quarterback is not running around getting mad time about

2070
01:39:36,160 --> 01:39:38,519
Speaker 3: I gotta be a running back, you know what I'm saying.

2071
01:39:38,520 --> 01:39:41,479
Speaker 3: He plays his position, and so my thing is I'm

2072
01:39:41,479 --> 01:39:43,799
Speaker 3: gonna play my position. I want her to play her position,

2073
01:39:43,840 --> 01:39:45,920
Speaker 3: and we're gonna win the super Bowl. And that's just

2074
01:39:45,920 --> 01:39:48,439
Speaker 3: what it's about. But you chose that. You chose her

2075
01:39:48,439 --> 01:39:50,400
Speaker 3: for a reason. I chose her for a reason. Either

2076
01:39:50,439 --> 01:39:53,840
Speaker 3: I made a bad decision and chose poorly, or I

2077
01:39:53,960 --> 01:39:56,240
Speaker 3: chose with the wisdom of God. And there was the

2078
01:39:56,320 --> 01:39:59,040
Speaker 3: wise decision. And I know that I got my suitable

2079
01:39:59,080 --> 01:40:02,439
Speaker 3: helper to help me win at everything. I mean at

2080
01:40:02,479 --> 01:40:05,920
Speaker 3: everything where there's help, where there's finances, where there's raising kids,

2081
01:40:06,080 --> 01:40:10,000
Speaker 3: where there's being a parent, whatever it is. I chose

2082
01:40:10,120 --> 01:40:13,120
Speaker 3: the person that will help me win at everything.

2083
01:40:13,320 --> 01:40:14,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have a question for y'all.

2084
01:40:14,960 --> 01:40:15,360
Speaker 2: Talk to me.

2085
01:40:15,640 --> 01:40:17,680
Speaker 1: You know, since we are getting married and you guys

2086
01:40:17,720 --> 01:40:20,080
Speaker 1: are already married, you two seem like, you know, you

2087
01:40:20,160 --> 01:40:23,680
Speaker 1: both have very if you are fine with your independence.

2088
01:40:24,040 --> 01:40:26,200
Speaker 1: You both had your own have your own businesses, and

2089
01:40:26,280 --> 01:40:31,439
Speaker 1: like very good in your solitude? How was merging Because

2090
01:40:31,600 --> 01:40:34,000
Speaker 1: I'll be honest, I've had I won't say a worry,

2091
01:40:34,080 --> 01:40:36,200
Speaker 1: but I thought about, like, man, you know, how is

2092
01:40:36,200 --> 01:40:41,520
Speaker 1: it going to be being becoming one and merging lifestyles

2093
01:40:41,840 --> 01:40:46,479
Speaker 1: living together. I've never lived with a woman, so other

2094
01:40:46,560 --> 01:40:48,320
Speaker 1: than my mother, God bless my mother too?

2095
01:40:48,360 --> 01:40:48,800
Speaker 2: Is the Redmond?

2096
01:40:48,800 --> 01:40:52,640
Speaker 1: I love you, I've never lived with a woman. I

2097
01:40:52,760 --> 01:40:54,840
Speaker 1: have three brothers. So I'm like, I don't know how

2098
01:40:54,840 --> 01:40:57,840
Speaker 1: that's gonna work. So how did you guys handle just

2099
01:40:58,080 --> 01:40:59,920
Speaker 1: merging lives and becoming one?

2100
01:41:02,360 --> 01:41:07,440
Speaker 2: I've been talking go ahead after Okay, so again submission.

2101
01:41:10,160 --> 01:41:11,920
Speaker 2: She looked at me. No, after.

2102
01:41:13,360 --> 01:41:15,519
Speaker 3: The reality is this? You don't have to have it

2103
01:41:15,560 --> 01:41:16,759
Speaker 3: all figured out? You said?

2104
01:41:16,880 --> 01:41:17,120
Speaker 4: How.

2105
01:41:18,320 --> 01:41:21,439
Speaker 3: She still has her property in La at a house

2106
01:41:21,600 --> 01:41:25,680
Speaker 3: here in Dallas. She went to La. Since we've been

2107
01:41:25,680 --> 01:41:29,320
Speaker 3: married three going on four months now, she spent two

2108
01:41:29,320 --> 01:41:31,439
Speaker 3: weeks in La in the month.

2109
01:41:31,600 --> 01:41:32,679
Speaker 2: Was that a week in December?

2110
01:41:32,760 --> 01:41:32,880
Speaker 1: Right?

2111
01:41:32,920 --> 01:41:36,920
Speaker 3: If we got married a weekend a week in December?

2112
01:41:37,680 --> 01:41:42,600
Speaker 3: Maybe two weeks in January or nine days in February.

2113
01:41:43,280 --> 01:41:46,280
Speaker 3: We're figuring out the reality and then I'll be like,

2114
01:41:46,400 --> 01:41:48,080
Speaker 3: all right, I'm gonna go to La. I'm gonna go

2115
01:41:48,120 --> 01:41:50,559
Speaker 3: spend some time with you. If she's if I look

2116
01:41:50,560 --> 01:41:52,679
Speaker 3: at the schedule and she says, I gotta go work

2117
01:41:52,720 --> 01:41:54,840
Speaker 3: and do all my stuff with Doorhawks, and I.

2118
01:41:54,800 --> 01:41:57,240
Speaker 2: Gotta be there for fourteen days.

2119
01:41:57,320 --> 01:41:59,000
Speaker 3: You ain't gonna be away from me. No, fourteen days,

2120
01:41:59,280 --> 01:42:01,840
Speaker 3: I'm gonna go being half of that time over there.

2121
01:42:01,840 --> 01:42:03,360
Speaker 3: All right, Well, I just pack up my stuff and

2122
01:42:03,400 --> 01:42:07,080
Speaker 3: I go work it from LA. So it's like, you

2123
01:42:07,120 --> 01:42:10,280
Speaker 3: don't have to have it all figured out when you

2124
01:42:10,320 --> 01:42:15,160
Speaker 3: talk about stuff like even living with somebody. Well, Astley

2125
01:42:15,200 --> 01:42:17,920
Speaker 3: at night likes it cold in the bedroom. You know

2126
01:42:17,960 --> 01:42:20,479
Speaker 3: what I'm saying, I'll be waking up sneezing because it's

2127
01:42:20,479 --> 01:42:21,280
Speaker 3: cold or whatever.

2128
01:42:21,560 --> 01:42:22,360
Speaker 2: And I realized it.

2129
01:42:22,479 --> 01:42:24,280
Speaker 4: Was sneezing because the air quality and.

2130
01:42:24,720 --> 01:42:27,200
Speaker 2: Freezing because it was also cold too the So I'd

2131
01:42:27,240 --> 01:42:29,280
Speaker 2: be like, because when I put a shirt on that day, I.

2132
01:42:29,240 --> 01:42:33,559
Speaker 4: Was now, he's not sneezing anymore.

2133
01:42:34,200 --> 01:42:36,799
Speaker 3: I had a shoot, so she had a fan blowing,

2134
01:42:36,880 --> 01:42:39,639
Speaker 3: So she would have fans blowing on you while you sleep.

2135
01:42:40,000 --> 01:42:43,439
Speaker 3: So I was like, okay, let's adjust to it. Well,

2136
01:42:43,560 --> 01:42:48,680
Speaker 3: the key to marriage is not to make everything so dramatic.

2137
01:42:49,120 --> 01:42:52,160
Speaker 3: You're learning this is a whole different life. Of a person.

2138
01:42:52,400 --> 01:42:55,120
Speaker 3: It's like you're you get a chance to try to

2139
01:42:55,120 --> 01:43:00,519
Speaker 3: cultivate your space where it's applicable for both parties. So

2140
01:43:00,560 --> 01:43:02,599
Speaker 3: it's like, you do this all right?

2141
01:43:02,680 --> 01:43:05,439
Speaker 2: Cool? When you take showers, she takes long showers. You

2142
01:43:05,479 --> 01:43:06,080
Speaker 2: know what I'm saying.

2143
01:43:06,439 --> 01:43:08,720
Speaker 3: My showers are shorter. So I'll jump in there while

2144
01:43:08,720 --> 01:43:10,840
Speaker 3: she take the shower. Do what I gotta do. She

2145
01:43:11,000 --> 01:43:12,920
Speaker 3: like to hog the water. I'll be like, hey, let me.

2146
01:43:14,240 --> 01:43:15,880
Speaker 3: I'd be like, let me stand in the back. Maybe

2147
01:43:15,880 --> 01:43:17,320
Speaker 3: I'll get a little water and throw it on me,

2148
01:43:17,439 --> 01:43:19,120
Speaker 3: like your little splash or whatever.

2149
01:43:19,160 --> 01:43:21,559
Speaker 2: I let her do a thing, and I'm on out.

2150
01:43:21,800 --> 01:43:25,240
Speaker 3: It's just I just try not to make everything so

2151
01:43:25,320 --> 01:43:30,479
Speaker 3: it's sometimes people fall out about stuff like why they

2152
01:43:30,479 --> 01:43:32,599
Speaker 3: squeeze the two paste from the middle and I squeeze

2153
01:43:32,600 --> 01:43:35,280
Speaker 3: it from the bottom. Just get two tubes of two paste.

2154
01:43:36,560 --> 01:43:38,679
Speaker 3: You got your two paste. I got my two pastes.

2155
01:43:38,800 --> 01:43:41,680
Speaker 3: It's like, I try not to make stuff such a

2156
01:43:41,720 --> 01:43:46,840
Speaker 3: big deal and to submit to the willingness that I

2157
01:43:46,960 --> 01:43:49,240
Speaker 3: chose you for a reason. The first thing that she

2158
01:43:49,320 --> 01:43:52,599
Speaker 3: got me was this ring when we were dating. And

2159
01:43:52,640 --> 01:43:56,080
Speaker 3: this ring tracks my heart tracks, my sleeping tracks everything.

2160
01:43:56,640 --> 01:43:59,679
Speaker 3: Her doing that for me made me prioritize my health

2161
01:43:59,680 --> 01:44:02,280
Speaker 3: in the way that I never ever prioritize it before.

2162
01:44:02,600 --> 01:44:03,880
Speaker 3: But what if I was like, I have going to

2163
01:44:03,880 --> 01:44:05,559
Speaker 3: read that stupid I ain't gonna do all that. I

2164
01:44:05,560 --> 01:44:08,639
Speaker 3: haven't do that because also this ring contract and show

2165
01:44:08,720 --> 01:44:11,040
Speaker 3: her when I'm not, like, how many hours of sleep

2166
01:44:11,160 --> 01:44:13,519
Speaker 3: I didn't get? So then she could be like, why

2167
01:44:13,560 --> 01:44:15,080
Speaker 3: you're in sleep? Why you ain't doing this, and that

2168
01:44:15,360 --> 01:44:18,640
Speaker 3: it makes you accountable to somebody because it shares the

2169
01:44:19,600 --> 01:44:23,320
Speaker 3: sleep number to her. And while we were dating, that

2170
01:44:23,360 --> 01:44:24,960
Speaker 3: could be a situation where I'm like, I don't need

2171
01:44:24,960 --> 01:44:26,160
Speaker 3: you all in my business like that.

2172
01:44:26,240 --> 01:44:28,240
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. But I was like, no,

2173
01:44:28,280 --> 01:44:30,400
Speaker 2: I want you in my business like that. I want you.

2174
01:44:30,520 --> 01:44:33,000
Speaker 3: I want my health to be your concern. I want

2175
01:44:33,040 --> 01:44:34,840
Speaker 3: my credit to be your concern.

2176
01:44:34,880 --> 01:44:37,719
Speaker 2: I want every part of me to be your concern

2177
01:44:37,840 --> 01:44:41,040
Speaker 2: so that I can be in the best version. And so, yes,

2178
01:44:41,560 --> 01:44:45,160
Speaker 2: we both got businesses. We work it out at the

2179
01:44:45,240 --> 01:44:45,800
Speaker 2: end of the day.

2180
01:44:45,960 --> 01:44:48,360
Speaker 3: I tell her all the time, even with a company doorhocks,

2181
01:44:48,400 --> 01:44:51,360
Speaker 3: I said, Hey, anything I can do for you, like

2182
01:44:51,400 --> 01:44:53,240
Speaker 3: what you come on as a co host for dear

2183
01:44:53,240 --> 01:44:53,880
Speaker 3: future wifey.

2184
01:44:54,560 --> 01:44:56,519
Speaker 2: I like to show up for you in your business.

2185
01:44:56,520 --> 01:44:57,240
Speaker 2: What you need to do.

2186
01:44:57,560 --> 01:45:00,400
Speaker 3: I'm booking flights for people, I'm making phone calls on this.

2187
01:45:00,520 --> 01:45:03,320
Speaker 3: I'm like, whatever you need me to do, I will

2188
01:45:03,439 --> 01:45:06,760
Speaker 3: do it. I will literally stand at the door if

2189
01:45:06,800 --> 01:45:09,519
Speaker 3: she allows me to actually check in people. I told her,

2190
01:45:09,520 --> 01:45:11,080
Speaker 3: I said, what you need to do with here, I

2191
01:45:11,120 --> 01:45:14,160
Speaker 3: ain't got no ego like you. Whatever my wife needs

2192
01:45:14,240 --> 01:45:17,519
Speaker 3: me to do, I will do it. Because at the

2193
01:45:17,640 --> 01:45:20,639
Speaker 3: end of the day, we always talk about the wife

2194
01:45:20,640 --> 01:45:22,920
Speaker 3: being a suitable helper, But I want to be her

2195
01:45:22,960 --> 01:45:25,439
Speaker 3: suitable helper as well, you know, I want to be like,

2196
01:45:25,520 --> 01:45:27,160
Speaker 3: I want to make your life easier.

2197
01:45:27,160 --> 01:45:29,400
Speaker 2: So what you need me to do? And so a

2198
01:45:29,439 --> 01:45:31,760
Speaker 2: lot of times we try to figure everything out. And

2199
01:45:31,800 --> 01:45:33,720
Speaker 2: you're not supposed to know what it's like to live

2200
01:45:33,760 --> 01:45:35,519
Speaker 2: with a woman if you ain't never lived with a woman.

2201
01:45:35,680 --> 01:45:36,280
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying.

2202
01:45:36,520 --> 01:45:38,720
Speaker 3: You ain't supposed to know what that's like until you

2203
01:45:38,720 --> 01:45:40,840
Speaker 3: get a chance to live with a woman. And then

2204
01:45:40,840 --> 01:45:42,600
Speaker 3: when you live with a woman, you go, this is

2205
01:45:42,640 --> 01:45:44,760
Speaker 3: what it's like living with a woman. How do I

2206
01:45:44,880 --> 01:45:48,160
Speaker 3: learn this? Like the first day of kindergarten, Mama probably

2207
01:45:48,160 --> 01:45:48,400
Speaker 3: was like.

2208
01:45:48,320 --> 01:45:50,160
Speaker 2: I just don't know. I don't trust nobody else being

2209
01:45:50,200 --> 01:45:52,280
Speaker 2: around my kid for the hour. She had to release

2210
01:45:52,320 --> 01:45:54,280
Speaker 2: that and allow you to learn what it was like

2211
01:45:54,400 --> 01:45:58,280
Speaker 2: to be in kindergarten, what we'd like to add to that.

2212
01:45:58,280 --> 01:46:00,960
Speaker 4: That was all great. I think.

2213
01:46:01,320 --> 01:46:05,799
Speaker 5: You know, guys do stuff sometimes like leave the toilet

2214
01:46:05,800 --> 01:46:10,920
Speaker 5: set up and things that don't probably seem big to women,

2215
01:46:11,520 --> 01:46:14,479
Speaker 5: but a lot of us are like, oh man, that

2216
01:46:14,520 --> 01:46:17,120
Speaker 5: would be nice if you just, you know, put the

2217
01:46:17,160 --> 01:46:19,640
Speaker 5: toilet seat down after you go to the bathroom or

2218
01:46:20,160 --> 01:46:20,600
Speaker 5: shot far.

2219
01:46:21,960 --> 01:46:23,800
Speaker 2: So this is what I did. So I did that

2220
01:46:23,920 --> 01:46:24,280
Speaker 2: at first.

2221
01:46:25,160 --> 01:46:26,680
Speaker 5: No, at first, he said, why do I have to

2222
01:46:26,680 --> 01:46:29,719
Speaker 5: put the toilet seat down?

2223
01:46:32,040 --> 01:46:35,080
Speaker 2: I said, your hands don't work. You can't lower the toilet.

2224
01:46:35,280 --> 01:46:37,360
Speaker 5: I'm like, at nighttime, I try not to turn on

2225
01:46:37,400 --> 01:46:39,920
Speaker 5: the light and then I fall in the toilet because

2226
01:46:39,920 --> 01:46:41,400
Speaker 5: I can't see the toilet.

2227
01:46:41,439 --> 01:46:43,519
Speaker 4: He's like, but why don't you know that it's down.

2228
01:46:43,600 --> 01:46:47,479
Speaker 5: I'm like, because it's dark to turn on the lights

2229
01:46:47,520 --> 01:46:48,479
Speaker 5: to wake you up.

2230
01:46:48,760 --> 01:46:51,000
Speaker 3: And so what I end up doing is I went

2231
01:46:51,080 --> 01:46:53,800
Speaker 3: and got a soft clothed toilet. I changed the whole

2232
01:46:53,840 --> 01:46:55,719
Speaker 3: toilet seat. I'm telling you ten me, it's a problem.

2233
01:46:55,720 --> 01:46:58,479
Speaker 3: I'm gonna fix it. I wouldn't change the whole toilet seat.

2234
01:46:58,640 --> 01:47:01,160
Speaker 3: And so now every time I leave, I just pushed

2235
01:47:01,160 --> 01:47:03,000
Speaker 3: the thing and it'll be slowly closed it up and

2236
01:47:03,040 --> 01:47:03,880
Speaker 3: I walk out the room.

2237
01:47:04,160 --> 01:47:04,920
Speaker 2: I did that.

2238
01:47:04,800 --> 01:47:07,320
Speaker 3: From but that was the first couple of weeks of marriage,

2239
01:47:07,720 --> 01:47:12,080
Speaker 3: so it's like after first, I'm like, wow, can't you

2240
01:47:12,120 --> 01:47:12,599
Speaker 3: can't close?

2241
01:47:13,080 --> 01:47:13,720
Speaker 4: Do you need to close?

2242
01:47:14,720 --> 01:47:18,519
Speaker 1: It makes sense? One rotation rotation, Yeah.

2243
01:47:18,400 --> 01:47:20,559
Speaker 2: I do this. You raise it up. We both moving.

2244
01:47:20,840 --> 01:47:22,679
Speaker 2: I have to raise it up when you when you leave,

2245
01:47:22,920 --> 01:47:24,639
Speaker 2: so you gotta lower it down when I leave.

2246
01:47:25,200 --> 01:47:28,080
Speaker 4: I don't always have to raise it up the bathroom.

2247
01:47:28,920 --> 01:47:29,599
Speaker 4: You have the option.

2248
01:47:34,120 --> 01:47:36,519
Speaker 1: Her thing was it's the resting position.

2249
01:47:36,800 --> 01:47:38,320
Speaker 2: Yes, the resting position.

2250
01:47:38,640 --> 01:47:40,799
Speaker 4: I tell him, the resting.

2251
01:47:40,600 --> 01:47:43,680
Speaker 5: Position, like I need to live down, yeah, because that's

2252
01:47:43,680 --> 01:47:48,720
Speaker 5: the resting position. Well yeah, so I'm like, because when

2253
01:47:48,720 --> 01:47:50,439
Speaker 5: it comes to my house and he used it makes

2254
01:47:50,439 --> 01:47:55,280
Speaker 5: you put the lid down too, because yes, the germs. Yes, okay,

2255
01:47:55,560 --> 01:47:58,439
Speaker 5: So my other thing is too, is that I am

2256
01:47:58,720 --> 01:48:03,040
Speaker 5: very particular. Some might call it OCD. Some might call

2257
01:48:03,080 --> 01:48:05,120
Speaker 5: it OCD. Okay, he is not.

2258
01:48:05,960 --> 01:48:06,519
Speaker 4: He is not.

2259
01:48:06,800 --> 01:48:10,160
Speaker 5: And I say this because these are the types of things,

2260
01:48:10,200 --> 01:48:12,760
Speaker 5: like the bed has to be made up a certain way,

2261
01:48:12,840 --> 01:48:15,040
Speaker 5: like I really like the home to look like it's

2262
01:48:15,080 --> 01:48:18,479
Speaker 5: in a magazine even though we're living in it, right,

2263
01:48:18,760 --> 01:48:21,680
Speaker 5: and that takes work, and some people may not value that.

2264
01:48:21,800 --> 01:48:25,240
Speaker 5: But then it can create and produce anxiety in people

2265
01:48:25,280 --> 01:48:29,599
Speaker 5: who do believe that everything has a certain place. And

2266
01:48:29,680 --> 01:48:32,120
Speaker 5: so I say this to say, you have to have

2267
01:48:32,200 --> 01:48:36,680
Speaker 5: those conversations and explain it from the perspective of not control,

2268
01:48:36,920 --> 01:48:40,439
Speaker 5: but the perspective of like this feels like chaos to me,

2269
01:48:40,640 --> 01:48:45,720
Speaker 5: and I can't be effective in this instrumental Yeah, like

2270
01:48:45,920 --> 01:48:48,760
Speaker 5: I need this to be organized so that I can

2271
01:48:48,840 --> 01:48:52,519
Speaker 5: function at a high level. That's what marriage is is,

2272
01:48:52,560 --> 01:48:56,639
Speaker 5: Like I know that you might normally not do this

2273
01:48:56,960 --> 01:49:01,000
Speaker 5: or you don't understand that, but camera exactly, can I

2274
01:49:01,240 --> 01:49:03,760
Speaker 5: wash the dishes or can we put the dishwasher to

2275
01:49:03,840 --> 01:49:08,360
Speaker 5: use because we do have these plates? And so again, right,

2276
01:49:09,000 --> 01:49:12,840
Speaker 5: you're going to have to have some of these conversations,

2277
01:49:13,120 --> 01:49:15,799
Speaker 5: but I think when you can meet in the middle,

2278
01:49:16,120 --> 01:49:18,800
Speaker 5: like you're not going to win every Like you know, now,

2279
01:49:18,840 --> 01:49:22,280
Speaker 5: when he leaves the toilet set up by act, when

2280
01:49:22,280 --> 01:49:26,360
Speaker 5: he leaves the toilet set up, I said, by accidents,

2281
01:49:26,360 --> 01:49:30,200
Speaker 5: by accident, I don't make it a fuss, Like I

2282
01:49:30,240 --> 01:49:32,160
Speaker 5: don't make it a big deal. I just put that

2283
01:49:32,240 --> 01:49:35,120
Speaker 5: toilet seat down one time late at night, fell in

2284
01:49:35,200 --> 01:49:38,200
Speaker 5: the toilet, got back up, just washed myself up and

2285
01:49:38,360 --> 01:49:40,120
Speaker 5: you know, off and let him go to s Like

2286
01:49:40,160 --> 01:49:40,720
Speaker 5: you know what I mean.

2287
01:49:41,080 --> 01:49:43,240
Speaker 4: It's not always about letting him know.

2288
01:49:43,360 --> 01:49:47,160
Speaker 5: It's just you ask and then you guys work together

2289
01:49:47,600 --> 01:49:50,200
Speaker 5: to you know, you want to live in peace. So

2290
01:49:50,320 --> 01:49:53,760
Speaker 5: sometimes it's not worth the back and forth. It's just

2291
01:49:53,880 --> 01:49:56,720
Speaker 5: like we'll move on and you know, like you said,

2292
01:49:56,760 --> 01:49:59,880
Speaker 5: he got the special closed toilet seats and ninety nine

2293
01:50:00,040 --> 01:50:02,719
Speaker 5: percent of the time that seat is down and I'm happy.

2294
01:50:02,800 --> 01:50:05,360
Speaker 4: I'm a happy woman. That's how I am. With a

2295
01:50:05,439 --> 01:50:07,760
Speaker 4: lot of germs. Oh my very much.

2296
01:50:07,840 --> 01:50:12,639
Speaker 5: Like yes, wipes, sanitizer, don't like touch that. And he's

2297
01:50:13,040 --> 01:50:15,599
Speaker 5: like it took him a while because he'd be touching

2298
01:50:15,880 --> 01:50:16,800
Speaker 5: yeah everything.

2299
01:50:16,960 --> 01:50:17,200
Speaker 1: Yeah.

2300
01:50:19,040 --> 01:50:22,040
Speaker 5: I'm like, so it's like he's gotten like he has

2301
01:50:22,080 --> 01:50:24,800
Speaker 5: wipes in his car. Now I got you some wipes

2302
01:50:24,840 --> 01:50:28,960
Speaker 5: he has like a little spiker yeah yeah, like we're

2303
01:50:29,000 --> 01:50:32,000
Speaker 5: hanging out, Yeah, he wash his hands because every time

2304
01:50:32,080 --> 01:50:33,880
Speaker 5: he go to grab my hand we in public.

2305
01:50:33,920 --> 01:50:36,360
Speaker 4: I be like yeah, because my mind.

2306
01:50:36,160 --> 01:50:38,120
Speaker 5: Is just like I'm so this is such a god

2307
01:50:38,200 --> 01:50:40,440
Speaker 5: moment that you're here right now, because.

2308
01:50:48,280 --> 01:50:51,240
Speaker 4: Like where he go, Like, my mind is going back

2309
01:50:51,240 --> 01:50:52,240
Speaker 4: to everything that's been.

2310
01:50:52,120 --> 01:50:56,559
Speaker 5: Touched and so he's got he sanitized his phone, good everything.

2311
01:50:56,600 --> 01:50:59,880
Speaker 5: So you know, he's really good at being like, Okay,

2312
01:51:00,040 --> 01:51:02,800
Speaker 5: if this is a bother to you, I adjust. Yeah,

2313
01:51:02,840 --> 01:51:05,400
Speaker 5: And he's really good at like fixing, like, oh I

2314
01:51:05,439 --> 01:51:07,920
Speaker 5: said I don't like it this way, I'll change it.

2315
01:51:08,240 --> 01:51:10,400
Speaker 5: So that's been great to hear it. He's I think

2316
01:51:10,439 --> 01:51:12,800
Speaker 5: he's more worried about how good of a husband he's

2317
01:51:12,840 --> 01:51:15,360
Speaker 5: going to be, but he doesn't see what I'm experiencing.

2318
01:51:15,360 --> 01:51:17,400
Speaker 4: And I'm like, you're on the right track.

2319
01:51:17,680 --> 01:51:20,240
Speaker 5: Yeah, he's on the right track, Like, yeah, he just

2320
01:51:20,240 --> 01:51:23,800
Speaker 5: doesn't see it because he's not seeing how he treats me. Yeah,

2321
01:51:23,800 --> 01:51:25,719
Speaker 5: And I'm like, if you only saw how you treat

2322
01:51:25,760 --> 01:51:28,080
Speaker 5: me every single day, yeah, Like.

2323
01:51:29,680 --> 01:51:31,519
Speaker 4: It's the best I've ever been treated, to be honest.

2324
01:51:31,600 --> 01:51:35,160
Speaker 4: And he still blows my mind every single day because

2325
01:51:35,200 --> 01:51:36,639
Speaker 4: he's like, if you don't like it, then we're gonna

2326
01:51:36,640 --> 01:51:37,400
Speaker 4: do something different.

2327
01:51:37,479 --> 01:51:42,720
Speaker 5: Facts and yeah, he's really good about that. And then

2328
01:51:42,720 --> 01:51:45,040
Speaker 5: when he when there's something that he's like, no, I

2329
01:51:45,120 --> 01:51:47,920
Speaker 5: need it, you know, even just with our OCD, like

2330
01:51:48,280 --> 01:51:53,000
Speaker 5: sometimes when he's stressed, don't even it's just okay, that's fine,

2331
01:51:53,040 --> 01:51:55,720
Speaker 5: Well I'll fix it later, ye or you'll just like, oh,

2332
01:51:55,760 --> 01:51:57,000
Speaker 5: you know where, I know where this goes.

2333
01:51:57,040 --> 01:51:58,200
Speaker 4: I can go ahead and put this away.

2334
01:51:58,600 --> 01:52:00,559
Speaker 5: And I think like that's one of the things that

2335
01:52:00,600 --> 01:52:01,719
Speaker 5: you'll learn when you're married.

2336
01:52:01,720 --> 01:52:02,400
Speaker 4: It's like, if.

2337
01:52:02,240 --> 01:52:04,639
Speaker 5: He's a little bit more, you know, I just pick

2338
01:52:04,720 --> 01:52:06,599
Speaker 5: up those clothes that are on the floor because I'm

2339
01:52:06,600 --> 01:52:07,519
Speaker 5: gonna wash him anyway.

2340
01:52:07,760 --> 01:52:10,680
Speaker 2: Yea, I hang up clothes, I do all that. The

2341
01:52:10,720 --> 01:52:13,000
Speaker 2: reality is just it's just it's just your helper at

2342
01:52:13,040 --> 01:52:13,599
Speaker 2: the end of the day.

2343
01:52:13,640 --> 01:52:16,599
Speaker 3: When y'all know that y'all working together, just work together

2344
01:52:16,720 --> 01:52:19,080
Speaker 3: and don't make it such a big deal. My rule

2345
01:52:19,200 --> 01:52:21,439
Speaker 3: is just let's not make it a big deal because

2346
01:52:21,600 --> 01:52:25,439
Speaker 3: there's people really out here struggling with some stuff. I mean,

2347
01:52:25,800 --> 01:52:28,479
Speaker 3: they don't even talk to their spouse. They spouse may

2348
01:52:28,520 --> 01:52:31,519
Speaker 3: be unemployed, lost the job. It's all it's big stuff.

2349
01:52:31,560 --> 01:52:33,760
Speaker 3: And we ain't gonna fall out because no toilet seat.

2350
01:52:34,160 --> 01:52:36,360
Speaker 4: Come on, man, we might fall in the toilet boat,

2351
01:52:36,400 --> 01:52:36,800
Speaker 4: not out.

2352
01:52:37,000 --> 01:52:40,800
Speaker 2: Yeah. Right.

2353
01:52:41,560 --> 01:52:43,839
Speaker 3: That's the thing about people following that over some stuff.

2354
01:52:43,880 --> 01:52:46,920
Speaker 3: It's like and then they internalize life. Well, you just

2355
01:52:46,960 --> 01:52:51,200
Speaker 3: don't care about me. And it's like, for forty something years,

2356
01:52:51,320 --> 01:52:53,560
Speaker 3: I didn't have to worry about doing X y Z.

2357
01:52:54,360 --> 01:52:56,160
Speaker 2: Can you give me some grace, like at the end

2358
01:52:56,160 --> 01:52:57,120
Speaker 2: of the day. And it was.

2359
01:52:57,160 --> 01:52:59,080
Speaker 3: And when you look at the woman, it's like, if

2360
01:52:59,120 --> 01:53:01,080
Speaker 3: you live by yourself, well, for all this time, you

2361
01:53:01,120 --> 01:53:03,640
Speaker 3: didn't have to worry about nobody else raising your seat up.

2362
01:53:04,000 --> 01:53:05,400
Speaker 3: So at the end of the day you have been

2363
01:53:05,640 --> 01:53:08,200
Speaker 3: trained to not even raise your seat up.

2364
01:53:08,720 --> 01:53:10,280
Speaker 2: So is that okay?

2365
01:53:10,720 --> 01:53:12,479
Speaker 3: Can we can we work through this in the first

2366
01:53:12,479 --> 01:53:15,160
Speaker 3: couple of months of marriage. And so I always say,

2367
01:53:15,200 --> 01:53:19,040
Speaker 3: sometimes we fall out over crazy stuff. Tambling David and

2368
01:53:19,080 --> 01:53:22,120
Speaker 3: Tamler was talking about how at the begin their marriage

2369
01:53:22,320 --> 01:53:24,400
Speaker 3: he would always leave cabinets. So he opened up a drawer,

2370
01:53:24,400 --> 01:53:26,759
Speaker 3: open up a cabinet, just leave it open, and she said,

2371
01:53:26,800 --> 01:53:29,040
Speaker 3: and they talked about he said, and now she doing that.

2372
01:53:29,280 --> 01:53:31,639
Speaker 3: He says, I'll fix where I don't close it. Now

2373
01:53:31,680 --> 01:53:33,920
Speaker 3: she just walked around, just open up cabinets and walk away.

2374
01:53:34,000 --> 01:53:36,000
Speaker 3: He said, what is wrong with that? She said, you

2375
01:53:36,120 --> 01:53:37,640
Speaker 3: used to do that at the beginning. She said, I

2376
01:53:37,640 --> 01:53:39,320
Speaker 3: don't know why I do that. Now I just be

2377
01:53:39,439 --> 01:53:41,760
Speaker 3: leaving cabtinets open. But at the end of the day.

2378
01:53:41,800 --> 01:53:44,040
Speaker 3: That should be something that you laugh about to be like,

2379
01:53:44,080 --> 01:53:45,439
Speaker 3: you remember when I used to do that. You just

2380
01:53:45,439 --> 01:53:46,960
Speaker 3: to get mad at me and I look at you, her,

2381
01:53:47,120 --> 01:53:47,719
Speaker 3: ain't so fun?

2382
01:53:48,200 --> 01:53:49,599
Speaker 2: Ain't fun? When the rabbit got the gun.

2383
01:53:49,880 --> 01:53:52,160
Speaker 3: So it's that same thing and you laugh about it

2384
01:53:52,200 --> 01:53:54,439
Speaker 3: instead of saying, see and I remember when you would

2385
01:53:54,439 --> 01:53:55,880
Speaker 3: do this and this, and you fall out and have

2386
01:53:55,920 --> 01:53:58,680
Speaker 3: an old argument because a cabinet was left open, like

2387
01:53:58,720 --> 01:54:00,160
Speaker 3: a cabinet.

2388
01:54:00,760 --> 01:54:06,320
Speaker 4: Had a fight about sharmama. All right, so we'll say

2389
01:54:06,320 --> 01:54:06,960
Speaker 4: a quick story.

2390
01:54:07,560 --> 01:54:10,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, we were going.

2391
01:54:11,120 --> 01:54:13,280
Speaker 5: So we went to a wedding expo and we won

2392
01:54:13,400 --> 01:54:17,600
Speaker 5: two fifty dollars two hundred and fifty dollars. And on

2393
01:54:17,680 --> 01:54:19,080
Speaker 5: the way back because I said, oh, we should go

2394
01:54:19,120 --> 01:54:21,920
Speaker 5: to that wedding expo and try out this new U

2395
01:54:22,160 --> 01:54:25,840
Speaker 5: Sharma spot. So we go to a wedding expo, very overstimulating,

2396
01:54:25,880 --> 01:54:27,760
Speaker 5: a lot of people, a lot of noise, and we

2397
01:54:27,840 --> 01:54:31,720
Speaker 5: get in the car and I'm just over stimulated, and

2398
01:54:31,720 --> 01:54:33,400
Speaker 5: I was like, I just need a moment, and so

2399
01:54:33,440 --> 01:54:36,520
Speaker 5: I fall asleep. I wake up and he was like,

2400
01:54:36,600 --> 01:54:38,960
Speaker 5: you still want to go? And the way we're driving,

2401
01:54:38,960 --> 01:54:40,760
Speaker 5: I said, looks like you're already taking me home, so

2402
01:54:40,840 --> 01:54:42,680
Speaker 5: I guess we're not going and I was like, well,

2403
01:54:42,720 --> 01:54:43,480
Speaker 5: you can do whatever you want to do.

2404
01:54:43,520 --> 01:54:45,760
Speaker 4: I don't care like and.

2405
01:54:45,800 --> 01:54:47,040
Speaker 5: I was like, well, if you want pete Away, you

2406
01:54:47,040 --> 01:54:49,480
Speaker 5: can get pet Away instead. And so he stops in

2407
01:54:49,520 --> 01:54:50,920
Speaker 5: pete Away. He's like, what are you going to get us?

2408
01:54:50,960 --> 01:54:56,440
Speaker 5: I'm not hungry, and he was like he just reversed.

2409
01:54:56,480 --> 01:54:58,640
Speaker 5: He didn't say a word, he reversed out of Pete Away.

2410
01:54:59,200 --> 01:55:01,280
Speaker 5: And I was like, so now you're not going to

2411
01:55:01,360 --> 01:55:03,480
Speaker 5: eat either, Like he's gotten a whole fight about how

2412
01:55:03,480 --> 01:55:06,000
Speaker 5: he's not eating because I'm not eating. And I said, well,

2413
01:55:06,000 --> 01:55:07,880
Speaker 5: I wanted to experience a Shorman spot with you, but

2414
01:55:07,880 --> 01:55:08,480
Speaker 5: you weren't going.

2415
01:55:08,520 --> 01:55:10,240
Speaker 4: He was like, I was going to the spot.

2416
01:55:10,480 --> 01:55:12,360
Speaker 5: It was literally like a couple of miles down the road,

2417
01:55:12,720 --> 01:55:15,240
Speaker 5: but I didn't know that because I didn't I know

2418
01:55:15,280 --> 01:55:18,360
Speaker 5: where we were. That's a word. Actually, I'm pretty discerned

2419
01:55:18,400 --> 01:55:20,520
Speaker 5: about that. You know, it's a word in there somewhere.

2420
01:55:20,760 --> 01:55:23,040
Speaker 5: And so the whole time we got in a whole

2421
01:55:23,040 --> 01:55:27,360
Speaker 5: fight about the shwarma, and eventually we ordered it and

2422
01:55:27,520 --> 01:55:29,960
Speaker 5: we're happy again. But we laugh about it because I

2423
01:55:30,000 --> 01:55:31,720
Speaker 5: was like, remember when I was yelling at you, because

2424
01:55:31,920 --> 01:55:33,240
Speaker 5: he didn't take me to go get Sharma.

2425
01:55:34,920 --> 01:55:37,480
Speaker 1: It'd be like that sometimes where she will you know,

2426
01:55:37,680 --> 01:55:40,280
Speaker 1: she'll have her moments. And he said, this is why

2427
01:55:40,320 --> 01:55:42,840
Speaker 1: you gotta let the Lord teach you for who you

2428
01:55:43,160 --> 01:55:45,440
Speaker 1: are going to be married to, because the Lord taught

2429
01:55:45,480 --> 01:55:49,680
Speaker 1: me patience. And there are sometimes we have moments where

2430
01:55:49,840 --> 01:55:51,720
Speaker 1: the old me would have just wrote it off, be

2431
01:55:51,800 --> 01:55:54,080
Speaker 1: like all right, whatever, I'm not even trying to I'm

2432
01:55:54,080 --> 01:55:56,320
Speaker 1: not because I'm quick to be like no, I'm not

2433
01:55:56,400 --> 01:56:00,200
Speaker 1: going to argue, and no one's bringing me out a character. Know,

2434
01:56:00,360 --> 01:56:02,480
Speaker 1: I'm not giving anyone the power enough to make me

2435
01:56:02,960 --> 01:56:06,000
Speaker 1: that upset because I'm a really laid back person. But

2436
01:56:06,880 --> 01:56:12,240
Speaker 1: with her, it's like she deserves all my patients more

2437
01:56:12,280 --> 01:56:14,360
Speaker 1: than anybody else does. It wouldn't make sense for me

2438
01:56:14,400 --> 01:56:17,920
Speaker 1: to be patient with other people and strangers and not

2439
01:56:18,000 --> 01:56:21,080
Speaker 1: be patient with her when she needs it most. So

2440
01:56:21,120 --> 01:56:24,360
Speaker 1: when we have these little arguments, either the Lord will

2441
01:56:24,360 --> 01:56:28,760
Speaker 1: tell me or I'd be like, okay, all I gave relax,

2442
01:56:29,240 --> 01:56:31,240
Speaker 1: take a deep breath, think about what you're going to

2443
01:56:31,240 --> 01:56:35,080
Speaker 1: say before you say it, and I'm able to, you know,

2444
01:56:35,640 --> 01:56:40,520
Speaker 1: bring it down. And sometimes she just needs something to eat.

2445
01:56:40,760 --> 01:56:43,760
Speaker 1: She just needs something to eat, or she's she's a

2446
01:56:44,040 --> 01:56:48,360
Speaker 1: very she she pump faked me because she made it

2447
01:56:48,360 --> 01:56:52,280
Speaker 1: seem like she wasn't really into the whole like love

2448
01:56:52,360 --> 01:56:55,400
Speaker 1: language of physical touch and things like that. But she

2449
01:56:55,400 --> 01:56:59,360
Speaker 1: she needs that affirmation and so sometimes I just I

2450
01:56:59,680 --> 01:57:02,680
Speaker 1: got to give her a little more and gotta love more.

2451
01:57:03,360 --> 01:57:05,360
Speaker 3: Well, real quick, let me ask you how you propose

2452
01:57:05,520 --> 01:57:06,800
Speaker 3: as we get ready to wrap this up.

2453
01:57:07,160 --> 01:57:12,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I proposed the day of. I had planned

2454
01:57:12,400 --> 01:57:14,720
Speaker 1: for her family to come out to our house and

2455
01:57:14,760 --> 01:57:16,880
Speaker 1: everything at the end of the night. So the plan

2456
01:57:17,080 --> 01:57:20,280
Speaker 1: was to go to this chapel. And what I told

2457
01:57:20,320 --> 01:57:23,280
Speaker 1: her is the only time that she said I could

2458
01:57:23,320 --> 01:57:26,480
Speaker 1: lie to her. So I told her, oh, yeah, I

2459
01:57:26,480 --> 01:57:29,280
Speaker 1: got to play at an event, this Christmas event, and

2460
01:57:29,320 --> 01:57:30,960
Speaker 1: she was like, oh is it you got to dress up?

2461
01:57:31,000 --> 01:57:32,600
Speaker 1: I'm like I had to play it all because if

2462
01:57:32,640 --> 01:57:34,560
Speaker 1: I said yes too quickly, she would have guest.

2463
01:57:34,560 --> 01:57:34,880
Speaker 2: So I was.

2464
01:57:37,560 --> 01:57:40,080
Speaker 4: I mean, he said, now don't I dress up? And

2465
01:57:40,120 --> 01:57:42,080
Speaker 4: I was like, well, we're going to dress up. It's Christmas.

2466
01:57:42,240 --> 01:57:43,880
Speaker 2: You got to make it. Her idea.

2467
01:57:44,360 --> 01:57:46,680
Speaker 1: Now, she thought I was going to propose later on,

2468
01:57:46,800 --> 01:57:47,840
Speaker 1: like early this year.

2469
01:57:47,920 --> 01:57:48,160
Speaker 6: Yeah.

2470
01:57:48,280 --> 01:57:51,080
Speaker 1: Oh, so she had no idea and so the day

2471
01:57:51,120 --> 01:57:54,920
Speaker 1: of I'm nervous and I got to play at these churches,

2472
01:57:55,000 --> 01:57:56,960
Speaker 1: and I'm at my church and she comes and she

2473
01:57:57,000 --> 01:57:59,400
Speaker 1: has this beautiful dress on and so and now it

2474
01:57:59,400 --> 01:58:01,960
Speaker 1: comes for us to go to the service. I pull

2475
01:58:02,040 --> 01:58:05,280
Speaker 1: up and I'm like, I needed her to go in.

2476
01:58:05,640 --> 01:58:07,080
Speaker 1: She didn't want to go in because I told her

2477
01:58:07,120 --> 01:58:09,800
Speaker 1: I got to come early because I had to make

2478
01:58:09,800 --> 01:58:11,480
Speaker 1: it look like it was a rehearsal. That's why there's

2479
01:58:11,480 --> 01:58:14,960
Speaker 1: no cards there. And so I walked in and I'm like, dang,

2480
01:58:15,000 --> 01:58:16,400
Speaker 1: she still sitting in the car. How am I gonna

2481
01:58:16,400 --> 01:58:20,080
Speaker 1: get her out? And so I went out and I said, hey,

2482
01:58:20,440 --> 01:58:22,640
Speaker 1: they want to meet you. They want to meet you know,

2483
01:58:22,800 --> 01:58:24,880
Speaker 1: the woman I've been dating. She was like, oh my gosh,

2484
01:58:24,880 --> 01:58:27,320
Speaker 1: I don't want to go in, Like, come on, you

2485
01:58:27,320 --> 01:58:31,200
Speaker 1: can just go in and then you can leave. And

2486
01:58:31,240 --> 01:58:33,800
Speaker 1: so she walks in and I had I made a

2487
01:58:33,880 --> 01:58:38,640
Speaker 1: video of a picture collage and videos of our relationship,

2488
01:58:38,840 --> 01:58:40,600
Speaker 1: and I put all our favorite songs on there. And

2489
01:58:40,600 --> 01:58:44,400
Speaker 1: so she was sitting in the chapel and they played

2490
01:58:44,400 --> 01:58:46,640
Speaker 1: the song. I was supposed to go out and sit

2491
01:58:46,680 --> 01:58:48,760
Speaker 1: with her, but I froze, so I was sending it

2492
01:58:48,800 --> 01:58:50,640
Speaker 1: back to the videos done, and then I went up.

2493
01:58:51,600 --> 01:58:55,160
Speaker 1: I was scared, and I proposed and she had no

2494
01:58:55,280 --> 01:58:58,720
Speaker 1: idea and she was so giddy and happy. And then

2495
01:58:58,720 --> 01:59:01,000
Speaker 1: we went back to the house with her family and everything,

2496
01:59:01,040 --> 01:59:01,640
Speaker 1: and it was beautiful.

2497
01:59:01,720 --> 01:59:03,040
Speaker 2: So he told the family was gonna do it.

2498
01:59:03,240 --> 01:59:05,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, I did. And I was worried about that because

2499
01:59:05,640 --> 01:59:07,080
Speaker 1: you know, sometimes things will get out.

2500
01:59:07,120 --> 01:59:11,120
Speaker 2: And how much advance did you tell them versus when

2501
01:59:11,160 --> 01:59:11,640
Speaker 2: you did it?

2502
01:59:13,560 --> 01:59:16,320
Speaker 5: You asked for them, He asked them for permission, months

2503
01:59:16,360 --> 01:59:17,560
Speaker 5: and events.

2504
01:59:16,880 --> 01:59:18,160
Speaker 2: Oh, I just.

2505
01:59:18,080 --> 01:59:21,920
Speaker 5: Told him his intentions. But he told I told him

2506
01:59:21,920 --> 01:59:24,080
Speaker 5: tell my dad because my mom can't hold water sometimes.

2507
01:59:24,560 --> 01:59:26,360
Speaker 5: And I was like, tell my dad and he'll know

2508
01:59:26,400 --> 01:59:27,360
Speaker 5: when to tell my mom.

2509
01:59:27,920 --> 01:59:28,760
Speaker 4: And when did you tell me that?

2510
01:59:29,040 --> 01:59:31,120
Speaker 1: I told your dad, like two weeks earlier, two or

2511
01:59:31,120 --> 01:59:31,800
Speaker 1: three weeks earlier.

2512
01:59:32,200 --> 01:59:34,080
Speaker 4: And my mom had no idea.

2513
01:59:34,440 --> 01:59:36,240
Speaker 5: And so she got to his house on the day

2514
01:59:36,280 --> 01:59:39,360
Speaker 5: that I was getting proposed to that she was there

2515
01:59:39,440 --> 01:59:40,280
Speaker 5: for a proposal party.

2516
01:59:40,400 --> 01:59:43,040
Speaker 3: Wow, he said, she came hold water pass this hour.

2517
01:59:43,120 --> 01:59:44,760
Speaker 3: So I'm telling her right now.

2518
01:59:44,800 --> 01:59:46,800
Speaker 5: She sound the couch and was like, Steve, why we're here.

2519
01:59:47,880 --> 01:59:51,040
Speaker 5: He said, oh, yeah's getting engaged. She was like wow,

2520
01:59:51,320 --> 01:59:54,480
Speaker 5: she had no idea, no idea until that time.

2521
01:59:54,800 --> 01:59:56,880
Speaker 2: So I love it. I love it.

2522
01:59:57,200 --> 02:00:01,040
Speaker 3: And so what have you seen change since December the

2523
02:00:01,080 --> 02:00:05,560
Speaker 3: twenty first and y'all's relationship spiritual warfare exst.

2524
02:00:05,360 --> 02:00:09,600
Speaker 5: Wife I think also that, but we've gotten so close

2525
02:00:10,000 --> 02:00:15,440
Speaker 5: from the spiritual warfare, Like things started to come against

2526
02:00:15,480 --> 02:00:18,080
Speaker 5: us in ways where we're like, why are we even

2527
02:00:18,560 --> 02:00:19,720
Speaker 5: like arguing about this?

2528
02:00:20,160 --> 02:00:21,640
Speaker 4: Why am I feeling this way?

2529
02:00:22,040 --> 02:00:24,200
Speaker 5: Like it was supposed to be a happy time, and

2530
02:00:24,200 --> 02:00:26,080
Speaker 5: why are we worried about things that God has in

2531
02:00:26,120 --> 02:00:30,040
Speaker 5: his hands? So us kind of like saying, okay, it's

2532
02:00:30,040 --> 02:00:32,600
Speaker 5: not us against each other, it's us against one enemy.

2533
02:00:32,600 --> 02:00:36,200
Speaker 5: But we're with God, so we won anyway, and that

2534
02:00:36,320 --> 02:00:39,640
Speaker 5: brought us so much closer. And I think spiritual intimacy

2535
02:00:39,760 --> 02:00:41,520
Speaker 5: just really is so strong.

2536
02:00:41,760 --> 02:00:44,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because we had to really lean on the

2537
02:00:44,040 --> 02:00:46,360
Speaker 1: Lord in a lot of situations. And the one way

2538
02:00:46,360 --> 02:00:49,440
Speaker 1: the devil would come is like to split us up,

2539
02:00:49,920 --> 02:00:52,840
Speaker 1: like to have me getting my feelings, her getting her

2540
02:00:52,840 --> 02:00:56,520
Speaker 1: feelings and not want to share those feelings with each other.

2541
02:00:56,960 --> 02:00:59,080
Speaker 1: And we would have to, you know, come to ourselves

2542
02:00:59,120 --> 02:01:01,440
Speaker 1: and say, well, this is how I'm feeling, and she

2543
02:01:01,600 --> 02:01:03,800
Speaker 1: say how she feels. I'm like Okay, she gives me

2544
02:01:03,800 --> 02:01:05,520
Speaker 1: advice on how to get through what I'm get through,

2545
02:01:05,760 --> 02:01:08,800
Speaker 1: and vice versa, and it brought us closer. It pushed

2546
02:01:08,840 --> 02:01:11,320
Speaker 1: us closer to Jesus, It pushed us closer to prayer.

2547
02:01:11,600 --> 02:01:14,240
Speaker 1: It pushed us closer to really seek the Lord and say, Lord,

2548
02:01:15,160 --> 02:01:18,720
Speaker 1: we need you to get through this. And you know,

2549
02:01:18,920 --> 02:01:22,320
Speaker 1: everything that the enemy has thrown, the Lord has brought

2550
02:01:22,400 --> 02:01:22,720
Speaker 1: us through.

2551
02:01:23,760 --> 02:01:26,720
Speaker 3: So when when did y'all get to this resettling where

2552
02:01:26,760 --> 02:01:29,800
Speaker 3: you said, hold on, we'reen affordify our relationship. We ain't

2553
02:01:29,840 --> 02:01:32,200
Speaker 3: finna be fighting and going over. We ain't allowed the

2554
02:01:32,200 --> 02:01:34,800
Speaker 3: devil to win. How long have y'all been in this space?

2555
02:01:37,120 --> 02:01:41,520
Speaker 1: Probably since what mid end of February is when it

2556
02:01:41,600 --> 02:01:46,640
Speaker 1: is when things like started to shift and I could

2557
02:01:46,640 --> 02:01:49,440
Speaker 1: tell like, okay, Lord, you're about to do something, because

2558
02:01:49,960 --> 02:01:53,360
Speaker 1: it's been it's been a fight. Even us getting here,

2559
02:01:54,720 --> 02:01:58,200
Speaker 1: it was a fight. Even that's a story for another time,

2560
02:01:58,880 --> 02:02:03,000
Speaker 1: just making it here. But since the end of February

2561
02:02:03,080 --> 02:02:06,120
Speaker 1: early March, we've been in this mindset of no, it's

2562
02:02:06,160 --> 02:02:08,680
Speaker 1: me and you and we're looking at Jesus. We're locked

2563
02:02:08,720 --> 02:02:11,720
Speaker 1: in and whatever the devil want to throw, he could throw,

2564
02:02:11,800 --> 02:02:13,040
Speaker 1: but we got God on our side.

2565
02:02:13,160 --> 02:02:15,920
Speaker 3: So twenty twenty six this year, y'all committed to get married.

2566
02:02:16,120 --> 02:02:17,520
Speaker 3: Have y'all picked a date yet?

2567
02:02:17,840 --> 02:02:18,080
Speaker 1: Yes?

2568
02:02:18,240 --> 02:02:23,240
Speaker 2: Yes, but that might change what d y'all resentally have?

2569
02:02:23,720 --> 02:02:26,440
Speaker 4: Well, we have it for November first, okay?

2570
02:02:26,600 --> 02:02:28,240
Speaker 2: White say, is gonna change change earlier?

2571
02:02:28,800 --> 02:02:32,800
Speaker 5: Well, I'm thinking of changing the venue, okay, And so

2572
02:02:32,880 --> 02:02:35,480
Speaker 5: if we can't keep the date, it might change, but

2573
02:02:35,720 --> 02:02:36,240
Speaker 5: we'll see.

2574
02:02:36,320 --> 02:02:40,360
Speaker 4: We're yeah, you're still six for sure.

2575
02:02:40,760 --> 02:02:43,080
Speaker 3: If the other venue that you want, if it's an

2576
02:02:43,120 --> 02:02:45,480
Speaker 3: earlier date, are y'all prepared to get married earlier?

2577
02:02:45,760 --> 02:02:46,040
Speaker 2: Yeah?

2578
02:02:46,120 --> 02:02:49,760
Speaker 5: Yeah, because if we get that venue, then we're definitely

2579
02:02:49,840 --> 02:02:51,760
Speaker 5: prepared for it.

2580
02:02:52,560 --> 02:02:55,959
Speaker 1: Yeah earlier, Yeah, yeah.

2581
02:02:57,320 --> 02:03:01,040
Speaker 4: Not too early, y'all prepared next month.

2582
02:03:09,200 --> 02:03:14,480
Speaker 3: So when you look back at this, and how do

2583
02:03:14,560 --> 02:03:18,120
Speaker 3: y'all feel right now? To know that the journey was

2584
02:03:18,160 --> 02:03:21,720
Speaker 3: a little bumpy. It took my boy Gabriel a little

2585
02:03:21,720 --> 02:03:25,400
Speaker 3: long for him to recognize who Guy placed in his life,

2586
02:03:25,440 --> 02:03:27,640
Speaker 3: the reason why God woke him up that morning tell

2587
02:03:27,680 --> 02:03:28,560
Speaker 3: them to go to your church.

2588
02:03:28,960 --> 02:03:32,200
Speaker 2: Took a little while. Uh, let me ask you this.

2589
02:03:32,280 --> 02:03:35,160
Speaker 3: Do you hear his concern when when he speaks as

2590
02:03:35,160 --> 02:03:38,160
Speaker 3: a man to say, uh, the importance of finances and

2591
02:03:38,200 --> 02:03:42,400
Speaker 3: how we have been innundated uh as men that we

2592
02:03:42,440 --> 02:03:45,560
Speaker 3: should have our finances quote unquote together, whatever that looks

2593
02:03:45,600 --> 02:03:46,560
Speaker 3: like before we get married.

2594
02:03:47,000 --> 02:03:47,920
Speaker 4: I hear his concern.

2595
02:03:48,560 --> 02:03:52,440
Speaker 5: He really wants to be able to take care of

2596
02:03:52,480 --> 02:03:56,040
Speaker 5: me without any care in the world. But me personally,

2597
02:03:56,960 --> 02:04:01,560
Speaker 5: I'm like, listen, find the Lord's gonna come through every time.

2598
02:04:02,080 --> 02:04:04,720
Speaker 5: And I like, we remind each other when hell have

2599
02:04:04,800 --> 02:04:06,880
Speaker 5: we ever been in a lack of finances where God

2600
02:04:06,920 --> 02:04:10,720
Speaker 5: didn't say you're good like I got you. So to me,

2601
02:04:11,360 --> 02:04:14,160
Speaker 5: I told him when we first had our talk about finances,

2602
02:04:14,680 --> 02:04:16,680
Speaker 5: I was never worried, but he.

2603
02:04:16,680 --> 02:04:19,360
Speaker 4: Was like, how are you not worried? And I was like,

2604
02:04:19,400 --> 02:04:22,520
Speaker 4: God's got it, Like I was like I'm not. He's like,

2605
02:04:22,520 --> 02:04:23,920
Speaker 4: I want to be able to take care of you

2606
02:04:24,360 --> 02:04:27,480
Speaker 4: and all that jazz. And I was like, I said, well,

2607
02:04:27,480 --> 02:04:29,040
Speaker 4: God's going to take care of us, and I will

2608
02:04:29,040 --> 02:04:32,000
Speaker 4: allow you to take care of me. So I was

2609
02:04:32,000 --> 02:04:33,960
Speaker 4: never really, that was never on my mind.

2610
02:04:34,240 --> 02:04:36,160
Speaker 2: Your mama didn't teach you. Who taught you that?

2611
02:04:36,240 --> 02:04:39,280
Speaker 5: Then for you to be that that took me my

2612
02:04:39,360 --> 02:04:42,520
Speaker 5: relationship with the Lord, to be honest, because my parents

2613
02:04:42,560 --> 02:04:43,760
Speaker 5: whole point of view as well.

2614
02:04:43,920 --> 02:04:47,200
Speaker 4: It was always make sure you have your own They

2615
02:04:47,280 --> 02:04:48,240
Speaker 4: raised me be very.

2616
02:04:48,120 --> 02:04:52,000
Speaker 5: Independent, but she also said, if you are with someone,

2617
02:04:52,080 --> 02:04:54,960
Speaker 5: make sure he has the means as well to take

2618
02:04:55,000 --> 02:04:57,640
Speaker 5: care of you, even if you do have your own money.

2619
02:04:57,720 --> 02:05:00,200
Speaker 5: So I had to get kind of strapped off from

2620
02:05:00,200 --> 02:05:03,640
Speaker 5: that mindset because if I when I had that mindset,

2621
02:05:03,680 --> 02:05:06,080
Speaker 5: I was dating someone else that was unequally yoke to me,

2622
02:05:06,840 --> 02:05:09,160
Speaker 5: and you know, people are like, oh, but he has

2623
02:05:09,240 --> 02:05:11,040
Speaker 5: this that and the third I was like, yeah, but

2624
02:05:11,120 --> 02:05:16,240
Speaker 5: y'all don't. Spiritually he's so poor, like his house in

2625
02:05:16,280 --> 02:05:19,480
Speaker 5: heaven is shattered because you know they.

2626
02:05:19,400 --> 02:05:20,560
Speaker 4: Say when you store your treasures.

2627
02:05:20,760 --> 02:05:25,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, So I was like, y'all, like usually the Lord

2628
02:05:25,680 --> 02:05:28,280
Speaker 5: like my building. My relationship with the Lord prior to

2629
02:05:28,360 --> 02:05:31,680
Speaker 5: him is what kept me from thinking that way because

2630
02:05:31,720 --> 02:05:35,480
Speaker 5: I couldn't easily saw him and been like, you know,

2631
02:05:36,440 --> 02:05:38,360
Speaker 5: you know, so I'm like how Like I could have

2632
02:05:38,360 --> 02:05:40,040
Speaker 5: been like how is he going to provide? But I

2633
02:05:40,080 --> 02:05:42,360
Speaker 5: can see how he's going to provide provide for me

2634
02:05:42,760 --> 02:05:45,240
Speaker 5: because of what the Lord has said to me. I'm like, y'all,

2635
02:05:45,280 --> 02:05:47,800
Speaker 5: don't y'all don't hear what I'm hearing, Like, y'all don't

2636
02:05:47,840 --> 02:05:50,400
Speaker 5: see what I'm seeing, so I don't want to hear

2637
02:05:50,480 --> 02:05:53,240
Speaker 5: the outside noise, so I just have to tune it out.

2638
02:05:53,880 --> 02:05:57,920
Speaker 1: What do you think when you hear that, Gabriel, It's

2639
02:05:58,000 --> 02:06:01,040
Speaker 1: nice to have a firm foundation. It's nice to have

2640
02:06:01,200 --> 02:06:03,840
Speaker 1: a woman who can speak life into you like she

2641
02:06:04,760 --> 02:06:10,800
Speaker 1: speaks life into me. And I had I've had, you know,

2642
02:06:10,920 --> 02:06:13,320
Speaker 1: other relationships where you know, they would say nice things,

2643
02:06:13,320 --> 02:06:16,000
Speaker 1: they try to encourage you. But the things that she

2644
02:06:16,080 --> 02:06:17,520
Speaker 1: says has Heaven behind it.

2645
02:06:18,960 --> 02:06:20,320
Speaker 2: He said, has Heaven behind it.

2646
02:06:20,400 --> 02:06:23,560
Speaker 1: And I and you gotta listen, and I and I

2647
02:06:23,640 --> 02:06:27,280
Speaker 1: and everything she says just really encourages me or really

2648
02:06:27,320 --> 02:06:31,040
Speaker 1: blesses me. And just sometimes I get I know the

2649
02:06:31,040 --> 02:06:33,520
Speaker 1: Lord's gonna provide. I have no doubt about that. It's

2650
02:06:33,560 --> 02:06:35,160
Speaker 1: just like, OKAYRD, what do you want me to doing? Like,

2651
02:06:35,200 --> 02:06:36,840
Speaker 1: I know, you got me in the music, you got

2652
02:06:36,920 --> 02:06:39,200
Speaker 1: me writing the book, you got me playing the keys,

2653
02:06:39,200 --> 02:06:41,600
Speaker 1: you got me doing social media, you got me preaching,

2654
02:06:42,080 --> 02:06:44,000
Speaker 1: doing mission at work. I'm doing all these things, which

2655
02:06:44,040 --> 02:06:47,800
Speaker 1: one is the one that's that's gonna, you know, lead

2656
02:06:47,920 --> 02:06:52,280
Speaker 1: to the provision that I'm seeking. And all the Lord says,

2657
02:06:52,280 --> 02:06:56,120
Speaker 1: the son trust me, I got it. And all she

2658
02:06:56,200 --> 02:06:59,600
Speaker 1: ever says is trust the Lord. He got it, and

2659
02:06:59,640 --> 02:07:02,440
Speaker 1: so that have Sometimes it can be a little frustrated.

2660
02:07:03,040 --> 02:07:05,800
Speaker 1: I got God and my woman saying the same thing.

2661
02:07:06,160 --> 02:07:07,240
Speaker 1: Nobody's listening.

2662
02:07:07,560 --> 02:07:09,320
Speaker 2: Nobody listen to me? What about me?

2663
02:07:12,880 --> 02:07:15,560
Speaker 1: But she she is, she is my rock like she is,

2664
02:07:16,760 --> 02:07:18,840
Speaker 1: I love her with every fire.

2665
02:07:18,680 --> 02:07:19,120
Speaker 2: Of my being.

2666
02:07:19,200 --> 02:07:21,080
Speaker 1: And I didn't think I could love somebody as much

2667
02:07:21,520 --> 02:07:24,400
Speaker 1: as I love and cherish and appreciate this woman.

2668
02:07:25,280 --> 02:07:26,800
Speaker 3: On that note, I want you all to pick up

2669
02:07:26,800 --> 02:07:30,600
Speaker 3: that box, pick up the box in the in the box,

2670
02:07:32,760 --> 02:07:34,040
Speaker 3: have just pick up the whole thing.

2671
02:07:34,120 --> 02:07:35,480
Speaker 2: Take the whole thing, put in your lap. Wa y'all

2672
02:07:35,480 --> 02:07:36,760
Speaker 2: can use the box to write on it.

2673
02:07:37,000 --> 02:07:39,440
Speaker 3: Grab a sharpie each, Grab one of those pieces of

2674
02:07:39,440 --> 02:07:43,360
Speaker 3: paper each. Think of a gem that you want to leave.

2675
02:07:43,520 --> 02:07:46,160
Speaker 3: It's a key to love, and you'll write down to

2676
02:07:46,240 --> 02:07:49,360
Speaker 3: key to love and sign your name on it, and

2677
02:07:49,400 --> 02:07:52,080
Speaker 3: then we'll have y'all read it, and then I'll tell

2678
02:07:52,160 --> 02:07:53,720
Speaker 3: y'all want to go hang it up?

2679
02:07:54,480 --> 02:07:58,680
Speaker 2: So just think of a kid love you want to leave. Ah,

2680
02:07:59,560 --> 02:08:00,560
Speaker 2: what do you think about this?

2681
02:08:01,480 --> 02:08:06,720
Speaker 7: I thought it was a wonderful episode. It was so

2682
02:08:06,840 --> 02:08:10,040
Speaker 7: nice to get to hear their story and how they

2683
02:08:10,080 --> 02:08:12,920
Speaker 7: started as friends just like us.

2684
02:08:13,160 --> 02:08:13,880
Speaker 2: Isn't that interesting.

2685
02:08:13,960 --> 02:08:16,840
Speaker 3: The episode that he went to was Alban and that

2686
02:08:16,920 --> 02:08:19,080
Speaker 3: was an episode that I called you about and said,

2687
02:08:19,080 --> 02:08:20,240
Speaker 3: watch this episode.

2688
02:08:20,400 --> 02:08:24,080
Speaker 2: I need you to Yeah, yeah, go ahead.

2689
02:08:24,080 --> 02:08:26,040
Speaker 3: What we're say I said, I need you to go

2690
02:08:26,120 --> 02:08:28,440
Speaker 3: see this episode to see if you can see what

2691
02:08:28,480 --> 02:08:31,000
Speaker 3: I saw, which is what which is that they met

2692
02:08:31,040 --> 02:08:32,240
Speaker 3: the same way that we.

2693
02:08:32,080 --> 02:08:35,080
Speaker 2: Met and they married.

2694
02:08:35,600 --> 02:08:37,280
Speaker 3: So can you watch this and see if the Holy

2695
02:08:37,280 --> 02:08:39,640
Speaker 3: Spirit speak to you and show you that I'm your husband.

2696
02:08:40,280 --> 02:08:42,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, you watch it. He was like, Okay, it's kind

2697
02:08:42,560 --> 02:08:42,840
Speaker 2: of cool.

2698
02:08:42,840 --> 02:08:44,280
Speaker 1: I said, was such a good episode.

2699
02:08:44,360 --> 02:08:46,240
Speaker 2: I said, good lord, it didn't didn't land the way

2700
02:08:46,240 --> 02:08:46,880
Speaker 2: I need to land.

2701
02:08:46,960 --> 02:08:49,560
Speaker 4: It landed the way you needed it, I said.

2702
02:08:49,400 --> 02:08:50,760
Speaker 2: Did not land. I'm glad.

2703
02:08:50,800 --> 02:08:52,760
Speaker 3: I'm glad my boy Gabriel got some out of it.

2704
02:08:52,840 --> 02:08:56,160
Speaker 3: He saw the episode and said, he said, God, this.

2705
02:08:56,160 --> 02:08:59,720
Speaker 2: Is my wife. This is.

2706
02:09:01,920 --> 02:09:04,280
Speaker 3: Episode was solid, and I'm gonna share this with y'all.

2707
02:09:04,480 --> 02:09:07,040
Speaker 3: People are gonna watch this episode and it's going to

2708
02:09:07,800 --> 02:09:09,640
Speaker 3: get them over that same hump.

2709
02:09:10,240 --> 02:09:11,760
Speaker 2: Uh. Some man who's gonna.

2710
02:09:11,520 --> 02:09:16,000
Speaker 3: Watch this episode and say, I saw Gabriel and Adriana

2711
02:09:16,160 --> 02:09:18,640
Speaker 3: and it spoke to me that this person that that

2712
02:09:18,800 --> 02:09:20,640
Speaker 3: may be in the friend zone. Somebody I may have

2713
02:09:20,680 --> 02:09:23,480
Speaker 3: been ignored and been overlooking. This is the person I

2714
02:09:23,520 --> 02:09:24,520
Speaker 3: need to tap into.

2715
02:09:24,880 --> 02:09:25,200
Speaker 2: Watch.

2716
02:09:25,320 --> 02:09:27,160
Speaker 3: Watch, you're gonna see somebody side in the DM and

2717
02:09:27,200 --> 02:09:29,520
Speaker 3: tell you that. Go ahead and read what you'all have

2718
02:09:29,600 --> 02:09:30,080
Speaker 3: in the paper.

2719
02:09:30,720 --> 02:09:33,360
Speaker 4: Well, I kept a short sweetheart to beat. I said,

2720
02:09:34,000 --> 02:09:35,440
Speaker 4: trust God and trust each other.

2721
02:09:36,240 --> 02:09:37,520
Speaker 2: Trust God and trust each other.

2722
02:09:37,800 --> 02:09:40,400
Speaker 1: I said, if God brought you together, he will make

2723
02:09:40,440 --> 02:09:41,320
Speaker 1: sure you stay together.

2724
02:09:41,920 --> 02:09:43,520
Speaker 2: Good, good, All.

2725
02:09:43,480 --> 02:09:45,800
Speaker 3: Right, let me ask y'all to put the box down

2726
02:09:45,840 --> 02:09:48,680
Speaker 3: and go walk and hang it up on an available

2727
02:09:48,880 --> 02:09:57,120
Speaker 3: hook on the thing, and we'll get ready to conclude. Yeah, man,

2728
02:09:57,320 --> 02:09:59,840
Speaker 3: you know I love it when I see people young

2729
02:10:00,240 --> 02:10:04,480
Speaker 3: making decisions to get married in twenty seven and thirty.

2730
02:10:04,720 --> 02:10:07,400
Speaker 2: I know you think no.

2731
02:10:08,080 --> 02:10:12,840
Speaker 5: In fact, studies, studies show that success rates for their

2732
02:10:12,880 --> 02:10:14,879
Speaker 5: age getting married are the highest.

2733
02:10:15,560 --> 02:10:16,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was.

2734
02:10:16,960 --> 02:10:21,640
Speaker 5: I read a statistic that if you're younger, it's a

2735
02:10:21,640 --> 02:10:24,920
Speaker 5: better success rate. So maybe maybe I read the wrong. No,

2736
02:10:25,120 --> 02:10:29,440
Speaker 5: late twenties is a really good predictor of success, they say.

2737
02:10:29,560 --> 02:10:32,840
Speaker 5: Early twenties they say isn't as And maybe that's because

2738
02:10:32,840 --> 02:10:35,160
Speaker 5: of your frontal low But that makes sense.

2739
02:10:35,200 --> 02:10:37,480
Speaker 4: I think you guys are really in a good spot.

2740
02:10:37,600 --> 02:10:38,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's crazy.

2741
02:10:38,560 --> 02:10:43,640
Speaker 3: Look, well, listen, how can people stay connected with y'all

2742
02:10:43,680 --> 02:10:44,600
Speaker 3: or get connected with y'all?

2743
02:10:44,600 --> 02:10:44,960
Speaker 2: What's y'all?

2744
02:10:45,000 --> 02:10:49,840
Speaker 1: Social Media's well, mine is Gabriel be that guy that's

2745
02:10:49,960 --> 02:10:52,600
Speaker 1: Gabriel the letter B and then that guy that's my

2746
02:10:52,640 --> 02:10:57,880
Speaker 1: Instagram and you can find me on there. Also have

2747
02:10:57,960 --> 02:10:59,920
Speaker 1: a book called The F Word that I just released.

2748
02:10:59,920 --> 02:11:04,000
Speaker 1: You can get that on Amazon, and I talk a

2749
02:11:04,000 --> 02:11:06,960
Speaker 1: lot about what we talked about today with fasting and

2750
02:11:07,040 --> 02:11:10,080
Speaker 1: things of that nature. And album that I just dropped

2751
02:11:10,080 --> 02:11:18,320
Speaker 1: called Departure by Gabriels on all platforms, streaming platforms, and yeah,

2752
02:11:20,000 --> 02:11:20,320
Speaker 1: you can.

2753
02:11:20,240 --> 02:11:25,040
Speaker 4: Reach me Instagram, Adrie, Underscore, t, I and E.

2754
02:11:26,960 --> 02:11:30,080
Speaker 3: Have you started shipping your cookies and stuff?

2755
02:11:31,240 --> 02:11:35,880
Speaker 4: I have not. No, I've been doing just home deliveries

2756
02:11:36,400 --> 02:11:41,320
Speaker 4: and pickups. If you want that. Instagram is plant Head Bakery.

2757
02:11:41,720 --> 02:11:45,040
Speaker 2: Plant Head Bakery if you're in the Detroit metro.

2758
02:11:44,800 --> 02:11:46,640
Speaker 4: Area Metro Detroit area.

2759
02:11:46,720 --> 02:11:47,760
Speaker 1: Good good, good good.

2760
02:11:48,560 --> 02:11:52,920
Speaker 3: We reschedule Detroit. It was originally gonna be Marsha twenty first.

2761
02:11:52,960 --> 02:11:55,800
Speaker 3: We're going to be doing Detroit on June the thirteenth

2762
02:11:55,840 --> 02:11:59,080
Speaker 3: at the Fisher Theater. The Dear Future Wifie Podcast Ultimate

2763
02:11:59,160 --> 02:12:02,200
Speaker 3: Live Experience. It's co hosted by myself and my lovely

2764
02:12:02,240 --> 02:12:06,720
Speaker 3: wife Ashley. Isn't my hair looking absolutely beautiful? Hair is beautiful.

2765
02:12:06,720 --> 02:12:09,120
Speaker 3: I love this little redhead. I like this, so I

2766
02:12:09,200 --> 02:12:11,760
Speaker 3: get a new wife every month. Ain't the man a

2767
02:12:12,120 --> 02:12:16,680
Speaker 3: mind again? So she looks absolutely lovely. But we're gonna

2768
02:12:16,680 --> 02:12:21,560
Speaker 3: be doing the podcast in Detroit, bringing my friends LaToya Luckett,

2769
02:12:22,080 --> 02:12:26,720
Speaker 3: h Thaddeus. Y'all saw the podcast with with him?

2770
02:12:26,760 --> 02:12:27,200
Speaker 2: Who else?

2771
02:12:27,360 --> 02:12:34,360
Speaker 3: Lexiuh, the merits Jonathan McReynolds. Yeah, my boy, Jonathan Mcreynold's

2772
02:12:34,360 --> 02:12:36,920
Speaker 3: gonna be doing a live performance. It's gonna be dope.

2773
02:12:36,960 --> 02:12:38,720
Speaker 3: It's gonna be a slew of people. It's gonna be

2774
02:12:38,720 --> 02:12:40,720
Speaker 3: an amazing time. Make sure you go visit the Lincoln

2775
02:12:40,760 --> 02:12:43,960
Speaker 3: the description and get your tickets to show up. It's

2776
02:12:44,000 --> 02:12:46,320
Speaker 3: gonna be an amazing, amazing time.

2777
02:12:46,440 --> 02:12:49,400
Speaker 2: Listen. May the love you share today outlive the season

2778
02:12:49,440 --> 02:12:49,720
Speaker 2: you're in.

2779
02:12:50,160 --> 02:12:53,280
Speaker 4: Man, carry you through the days when words are few

2780
02:12:53,560 --> 02:12:55,320
Speaker 4: and faith has to do the talking.

2781
02:12:55,600 --> 02:12:57,520
Speaker 2: Y'all. Give it up, y'all for my homes.

2782
02:13:01,000 --> 02:13:05,280
Speaker 3: Ladarian thrust it suddenly into child protective Services.

2783
02:13:05,280 --> 02:13:08,640
Speaker 2: In twenty fifteen, my nephew Black.

2784
02:13:09,000 --> 02:13:12,360
Speaker 3: A boy the likelihood have been adopted outside of kinship

2785
02:13:13,120 --> 02:13:18,360
Speaker 3: slim to none. Rmione sixteen years old black, a boy

2786
02:13:18,800 --> 02:13:21,360
Speaker 3: with five years in the Falter care system before I

2787
02:13:21,400 --> 02:13:22,280
Speaker 3: even knew his name.

2788
02:13:23,080 --> 02:13:26,800
Speaker 2: The likelihood have ever been adopted? Yep, you guessed it.

2789
02:13:27,400 --> 02:13:28,400
Speaker 2: Slim to none.

2790
02:13:29,920 --> 02:13:32,920
Speaker 3: While Ladarian and Ourmiani were trying to survive and barely

2791
02:13:32,960 --> 02:13:36,440
Speaker 3: thrive in an overpopulated and underfunded false care system, I

2792
02:13:36,520 --> 02:13:39,840
Speaker 3: was living my own life, doing well professionally, having been

2793
02:13:39,880 --> 02:13:42,080
Speaker 3: a single father with a daughter who at that point

2794
02:13:42,120 --> 02:13:44,520
Speaker 3: was doing well in college. It was my time to

2795
02:13:44,520 --> 02:13:51,080
Speaker 3: live my life right wrong. I felt unsettled, tireless, agitated.

2796
02:13:52,040 --> 02:13:55,440
Speaker 3: There are just two many of our black children stuck

2797
02:13:55,680 --> 02:13:59,160
Speaker 3: in ambiguity and in the limbo of the Falter care system.

2798
02:14:00,000 --> 02:14:02,800
Speaker 3: Twenty seventeen, I legally adopted my nephew Ladarian.

2799
02:14:03,440 --> 02:14:04,720
Speaker 2: Fast forward to twenty nineteen.

2800
02:14:04,760 --> 02:14:06,960
Speaker 3: I had no ties to this other young king, but

2801
02:14:07,000 --> 02:14:09,560
Speaker 3: I felt God instructed me to adopt them also on

2802
02:14:09,640 --> 02:14:13,720
Speaker 3: an babe starting over with parenting should have been enough. Right,

2803
02:14:13,760 --> 02:14:16,560
Speaker 3: working with various foster care and adoption agencies to help

2804
02:14:16,560 --> 02:14:19,680
Speaker 3: bring awareness to the countless young Black kings and the

2805
02:14:19,680 --> 02:14:24,200
Speaker 3: foster care system should have decreased my agitation right joining

2806
02:14:24,200 --> 02:14:27,200
Speaker 3: the board of directors of Advantage of Adoption and organization

2807
02:14:27,280 --> 02:14:30,520
Speaker 3: that helps find permanent adoptive homes for children in Falster

2808
02:14:30,560 --> 02:14:32,720
Speaker 3: care should have led to some type of resolve.

2809
02:14:32,840 --> 02:14:37,280
Speaker 2: Right, No, not at all. None of it felt like

2810
02:14:37,360 --> 02:14:38,440
Speaker 2: I had done enough.

2811
02:14:39,480 --> 02:14:43,560
Speaker 3: I now realized that every one of those experiences was

2812
02:14:43,640 --> 02:14:48,080
Speaker 3: land the fundamental foundation for my life's mission. Kingdom Royal.

2813
02:14:49,000 --> 02:14:51,720
Speaker 3: Kingdom Royal would be a luxury, state of the art

2814
02:14:51,720 --> 02:14:54,920
Speaker 3: home for foster boys. Our first location will be in

2815
02:14:54,960 --> 02:14:57,960
Speaker 3: the Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex. We will utilize the whole

2816
02:14:58,040 --> 02:15:02,680
Speaker 3: person approach that instills idea, empowers them to advocate for themselves,

2817
02:15:02,880 --> 02:15:07,040
Speaker 3: and enlightens them regarding new perspectives and limitless options that

2818
02:15:07,080 --> 02:15:09,280
Speaker 3: they thought were impossible.

2819
02:15:10,400 --> 02:15:10,600
Speaker 2: Though.

2820
02:15:10,600 --> 02:15:12,840
Speaker 3: The young Kings will attend the local public schools that

2821
02:15:12,880 --> 02:15:16,120
Speaker 3: are in proximity the King of Royale. Our at home

2822
02:15:16,160 --> 02:15:19,800
Speaker 3: curriculum will broaden their worldview through participating in the arts,

2823
02:15:19,920 --> 02:15:24,720
Speaker 3: attending various cultural events, learning about and engaging in multifaceted

2824
02:15:24,760 --> 02:15:29,480
Speaker 3: discussions about current events and even relevant historical contexts. Introducing

2825
02:15:29,520 --> 02:15:32,720
Speaker 3: them to gardening and landscaping, and even caring for our

2826
02:15:32,800 --> 02:15:33,880
Speaker 3: animals on.

2827
02:15:33,800 --> 02:15:35,920
Speaker 2: Our form and on site stables.

2828
02:15:36,480 --> 02:15:39,880
Speaker 3: We just launched our startup capital campaign with the goal

2829
02:15:39,920 --> 02:15:41,520
Speaker 3: of raising two point eight million dollars.

2830
02:15:41,600 --> 02:15:43,040
Speaker 2: Now why two point eight million dollars?

2831
02:15:43,840 --> 02:15:46,200
Speaker 3: Well, In twenty seventeen, I created a web series in

2832
02:15:46,240 --> 02:15:49,520
Speaker 3: which I performed random acts of kindness for targeting the

2833
02:15:49,520 --> 02:15:52,640
Speaker 3: homeless community. One of the most notable successes was that

2834
02:15:52,680 --> 02:15:53,800
Speaker 3: one of the videos went.

2835
02:15:53,760 --> 02:15:57,600
Speaker 2: Viral, garnering twenty eight million views.

2836
02:15:57,720 --> 02:16:00,440
Speaker 3: However, one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't

2837
02:16:00,520 --> 02:16:03,440
Speaker 3: raise a single dollar to help in implementing a more

2838
02:16:03,480 --> 02:16:07,320
Speaker 3: sustainable plan for the homeless community. So throughout the years,

2839
02:16:08,160 --> 02:16:12,040
Speaker 3: with much remorse, I reflect that I'm not maximizing that moment.

2840
02:16:12,120 --> 02:16:13,280
Speaker 2: I knew if at that.

2841
02:16:13,320 --> 02:16:16,560
Speaker 3: Time just ten percent of the viewers donated one dollar,

2842
02:16:17,040 --> 02:16:20,240
Speaker 3: we would have raised at least two point eight million

2843
02:16:20,280 --> 02:16:23,120
Speaker 3: dollars that could have really established long term support for

2844
02:16:23,200 --> 02:16:26,440
Speaker 3: the homeless community, or at least started a long term

2845
02:16:26,440 --> 02:16:31,040
Speaker 3: initiative to do so. This is my do over, this

2846
02:16:31,240 --> 02:16:34,720
Speaker 3: is our new beginning. Together, we can attack this at

2847
02:16:34,720 --> 02:16:38,920
Speaker 3: the route by specifically helping our homeless Black boys who

2848
02:16:39,040 --> 02:16:43,520
Speaker 3: are already disproportionately represented in the American fossil care system.

2849
02:16:44,080 --> 02:16:47,720
Speaker 2: I'm a terisar Wickfield. I've been nominated for three Regional Emmys,

2850
02:16:47,760 --> 02:16:50,360
Speaker 2: documenting my work with the homeless as well as my

2851
02:16:50,480 --> 02:16:55,280
Speaker 2: personal adoption journey. Despite those accolades, the greatest award for

2852
02:16:55,360 --> 02:17:00,360
Speaker 2: me is truly providing the infrastructure for a transformed life.

2853
02:17:01,280 --> 02:17:04,640
Speaker 2: Visit Kingdom Royal dot com for more details, Crown a

2854
02:17:04,720 --> 02:17:15,240
Speaker 2: king and make a donation today. I hope you enjoyed

2855
02:17:15,320 --> 02:17:18,840
Speaker 2: this episode of the Dear Future WIFEI podcast. Remember be lit,

2856
02:17:19,240 --> 02:17:23,160
Speaker 2: live intentionally and transparently, and don't stop loving.

2857
02:17:23,600 --> 02:17:25,920
Speaker 3: Make sure to subscribe to our Dear Future Wife you

2858
02:17:25,920 --> 02:17:29,760
Speaker 3: YouTube channel. We're available on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify,

2859
02:17:29,800 --> 02:17:33,200
Speaker 3: and Stitcher. Welcome your support. Simply share our podcasts with

2860
02:17:33,240 --> 02:17:34,119
Speaker 3: your friends and family.