Speaker 1: I was very superficial. I had one of those stupid lists.
Speaker 2: Why do you call that list superficial?
Speaker 1: You know when little girls were thinking of like, oh,
Speaker 1: prince charming, and it's over time that prince charming turned
Speaker 1: into what my ideal husband would be.
Speaker 3: I think it's interesting because a lot of women think
Speaker 3: like that.
Speaker 2: I ain't never met a man that thought like that.
Speaker 1: I had this list.
Speaker 2: A lot of people can fit the list.
Speaker 3: It's not like we go, she has to look like this,
Speaker 3: she has to be this hight, this skin tone, she
Speaker 3: gotta be fine.
Speaker 2: Women be having a picture in their brains.
Speaker 3: You talked about starting off as a young girl, but
Speaker 3: we hear prince charming and prince charming. If we focus
Speaker 3: on even that name, he's just charming and the physical
Speaker 3: attributes of him. We just start creating this. And so
Speaker 3: this is what happens a lot, and this is the truth.
Speaker 3: And women get mad about it. They go, he married
Speaker 3: this type, but he keeps liking this on social media.
Speaker 3: When I say this to women, they may not understand.
Speaker 3: And there's a different category that men put wives in
Speaker 3: and women that he put that he.
Speaker 2: Just smashed in. And that is two distinct categories.
Speaker 3: And women confused themselves to be like, but he married this,
Speaker 3: and be like, yeah, he.
Speaker 2: Spent his life with that. He gave that to his name.
Speaker 2: Just looks. Proof is in the push.
Speaker 4: I remember talking to, you know, one of the mentors
Speaker 4: that I had. He said, if you ever find a
Speaker 4: woman that's too good to be true, married, I've apposed
Speaker 4: to it, like right after, because I was like, I
Speaker 4: need to make sure that this stays in my life.
Speaker 2: And that was it for me. I need to make
Speaker 2: sure this stays in my life.
Speaker 3: Look at she looked at she melt and over. We
Speaker 3: got your little one doing the technical side of the
Speaker 3: episode today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, shout out to CJ.
Speaker 5: So.
Speaker 2: So we we drafted CJ.
Speaker 3: So if y'all hear me sometimes given technical direction to him.
Speaker 2: Let's just jump into y'all love story, all right.
Speaker 3: What started as a search for understanding became a journey
Speaker 3: of transformation.
Speaker 2: Every letter that I wrote led me to this day.
Speaker 2: The day I.
Speaker 3: Got married November the twenty second, twenty twenty five.
Speaker 6: Dear my forever, Forever is a long time. That's how
Speaker 6: long I'll love you. Those lyrics echo through every fiber
Speaker 6: of my soul. At the very thought of you.
Speaker 3: This journey has culminated with you as both the award
Speaker 3: and the reward of my pursuit of love. You are
Speaker 3: the award, the honor God placed before me, the recognition
Speaker 3: of growth, healing, and becoming the man I needed to be.
Speaker 6: And you are the reward, the blessing given after endurance,
Speaker 6: the gift promised to those who refuse to faint.
Speaker 3: This isn't just our story, this is for all of us.
Speaker 2: I'm the Terisaur Whitfield.
Speaker 7: And I'm Ashley are Windfield. Welcome to the Dear Future Podcast.
Speaker 3: Welcome to the Dear Future Wife Podcast. I'm your host Litarisar.
Speaker 7: With hild and I'm Ashley are with filter listen?
Speaker 3: Are you still shacking up with us? Come on, if
Speaker 3: you're still shacking up with us, can we get a commitment?
Speaker 3: Hit that subscription button and subscribe. Make sure you turn
Speaker 3: on your notification bell so you be notified about upcoming episodes.
Speaker 2: It is so important for you to hit that subscription button.
Speaker 3: We do these episodes on a weekly basis, and we
Speaker 3: spend so much time, energy and finances making sure that
Speaker 3: we deliver this content free of charge to you. And
Speaker 3: so the way you show your support and appreciation is
Speaker 3: simply hitting that subscription button and make sure you turn
Speaker 3: your notification bell because a lot of times people are saying,
Speaker 3: how do I know when y'are going live on Wednesdays
Speaker 3: at nine am Central Standard time. Well, the way you
Speaker 3: find out is you get a notification email let you
Speaker 3: know that we are about to go live thirty minutes
Speaker 3: before we actually go lives, or make sure you hit
Speaker 3: that notification bell man. Today's episode is gonna be quite fun.
Speaker 3: I got my people on the podcast, I got my buddies, uh,
Speaker 3: and we're gonna we're gonna unpack how they've been instrumental
Speaker 3: and building the brand of one of my projects. So,
Speaker 3: without further ado, welcome to a Dear Future WIFEI podcast.
Speaker 3: My homies Charles and Johnson mcgil how y'all doing really.
Speaker 1: Excited to be here. Thank you so much for.
Speaker 3: Having us guys, Thank you so much. Charles, can you
Speaker 3: put your microphone closer to close?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Right there, right there, so listen.
Speaker 3: We got your little one doing the the technical side
Speaker 3: of the episode today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, shout out to CJ.
Speaker 2: So so we we we drafted CJ. So if y'all
Speaker 2: hear me.
Speaker 3: Sometimes given technical direction, to them like right now, CJ.
Speaker 3: Go to the camera three and so we're training up
Speaker 3: a child in the way they should go.
Speaker 2: Amen.
Speaker 1: And it's this actually a blessing because a lot parents
Speaker 1: won't bring their kids to something like that. You know,
Speaker 1: we really try to immerse them in everything that we do.
Speaker 1: We tell them about our clients to inspire them. So
Speaker 1: you letting him do that is like, thank you so much.
Speaker 2: This actually really this.
Speaker 4: Is a total alignment in so many ways because we
Speaker 4: actually recently decided to even take them out of school
Speaker 4: and homeschool them so that they can, you know, better
Speaker 4: grow their talents. Because this boy they want, the one
Speaker 4: that's listened to us right now. During the State he
Speaker 4: even saying he wanted to be a billionaire since he
Speaker 4: was five years old in front of it, and he
Speaker 4: also was able to explain asked them at five years old,
Speaker 4: I'm like, what does that even mean?
Speaker 2: Like how do you become a billiaire?
Speaker 4: He said, well, you pay a lot of people, do
Speaker 4: a lot of things at five years old. I said, hey, man,
Speaker 4: that's it. So this boy's been understanding things. He's been
Speaker 4: breaking down business ideas to me for a while. He's
Speaker 4: now ten and and and the school told us at
Speaker 4: this point, They're like, we just don't have anything for him,
Speaker 4: and so we're like, listen, we don't want to block
Speaker 4: his blessing. We want to figure this thing out. So
Speaker 4: who knows, Maybe this is it.
Speaker 6: Man.
Speaker 3: It's cool because what I've always found, it's all about exposure.
Speaker 3: Ashley was a former school teacher in her earlier life
Speaker 3: in her twenties. But she talks about exposing kids and
Speaker 3: she's really, I mean, let me not even speak on it.
Speaker 3: You right here, So what do you think about exposing
Speaker 3: kids and stuff like this.
Speaker 8: Well, experiences are what make kids, basically, they set them
Speaker 8: up for life. And so when there's a lack of exposure,
Speaker 8: sometimes we don't even know how high we can go
Speaker 8: or what is possible.
Speaker 7: Right.
Speaker 8: We did Teach for America shout out to Teach for
Speaker 8: America together actually the same year I just found out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the world go to the wire shot.
Speaker 3: SoJ I want you, when you see us talking as
Speaker 3: a as a group, go to camera three. So go
Speaker 3: to camera three and let us sit on camera three
Speaker 3: for a little bit.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I was Miami cor Yeah, and I was New.
Speaker 7: York City core. Crazy. That is crazy. We're not the
Speaker 7: same age though.
Speaker 2: You want to make sure you say that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I always say that.
Speaker 2: You remind me. That's right, that's clear.
Speaker 7: He was a little older when he got into the court.
Speaker 4: I went the non conventional path. I didn't go directly
Speaker 4: out of college. Uh So, I just I was actually
Speaker 4: a community organizer out in Oakland and decided just to
Speaker 4: apply because people had said, well, when I was organizing,
Speaker 4: they were like, you know, you should help out more people,
Speaker 4: you help out the kids. And I never thought about
Speaker 4: being a teacher. I was like no, you know, like,
Speaker 4: like what do you mean. They're like, well, there's there's
Speaker 4: only two percent of you know, the population of teachers
Speaker 4: is black males. And I thought about it. I was like, well,
Speaker 4: the only black male teacher. I only had one. And
Speaker 4: that one that I had was my junior year in
Speaker 4: high school and he was the reason why I went
Speaker 4: to college. And so I thought, well, maybe if I
Speaker 4: could help out somebody else, you know. So that's why
Speaker 4: I just applied, just went online and you know what
Speaker 4: grade did you teach?
Speaker 2: Seventh grade math?
Speaker 1: Wow?
Speaker 4: In North Miami.
Speaker 7: Oh that's dope, that's dope.
Speaker 1: And I went on to become a principal.
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, at the same school.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no no. I went from Miami.
Speaker 4: Then I went to New York to become a dean
Speaker 4: out there, and went to grad school out there, and
Speaker 4: then met John C. And then we moved to Sacramerica, went.
Speaker 1: To grad school at Columbia.
Speaker 4: And then I came out to California, where I became
Speaker 4: principal out there.
Speaker 2: It was everywhere. Yeah, man, so you went to New
Speaker 2: York and that's where she taught.
Speaker 1: Where did you teach?
Speaker 8: I taught at Excellence Boys Charter School, so.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, yeah, he's your Canarsie. Oh my god.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah so that was but that was twenty thirteen,
Speaker 4: I think, so were you still there?
Speaker 5: No.
Speaker 8: I left in twenty twelve and then I went I
Speaker 8: went back to LA to work at the Broad Center. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 8: that's crazy, and he did.
Speaker 1: So.
Speaker 8: I taught all boys kindergarten and first really really impactful
Speaker 8: teaching all little black boys, like I loved, loved it.
Speaker 1: So that's awesome.
Speaker 4: Common school, so you know exactly the type of teaching
Speaker 4: that we were doing and how yes.
Speaker 8: Yes, yeah back then, you know I was I think
Speaker 8: I was like the second cohort at Hunter College, which
Speaker 8: is now Relay Graduate School of Education. So it was
Speaker 8: like back then, like Dave Levin was one of our professors,
Speaker 8: which if people don't know, Dave is one of the
Speaker 8: founders of KIP, so you know KIP as we know
Speaker 8: it today. Like I used to just sit in grad
Speaker 8: school and be like, this is really cool.
Speaker 7: So yeah, we were.
Speaker 8: We were definitely trailblazing some ideas at uncommon, some that
Speaker 8: were found to be great and some maybe not so great,
Speaker 8: you know, But I think we just give ourselves grace
Speaker 8: because we were trying to really create opportunities in neighborhoods
Speaker 8: where people had forgotten about our kids. And I'm gonna
Speaker 8: say our kids were forgotten about.
Speaker 3: Unexpected when stuff comes into the conversation that's so uncommon.
Speaker 2: Exactly.
Speaker 8: And then one more thing just about exposure is like
Speaker 8: I do think that for our kids, like a lot
Speaker 8: of times, if we don't show them what's possible, then
Speaker 8: we're just raising them.
Speaker 7: And they don't know.
Speaker 8: They don't even know that's a career, that's an option
Speaker 8: or wow, people get paid to do that.
Speaker 7: And so it is really cool to have CJ here today.
Speaker 8: Learning about what you know behind the scenes looks like,
Speaker 8: so that when he does become the owner of several studios, yeah,
Speaker 8: whatever that is.
Speaker 7: He can be like, well, I started when I was ten.
Speaker 3: Remember, I'm gonna Benna be a little older that need
Speaker 3: to come bless me. That's it, you know, So see
Speaker 3: back into my life. Bions of dollars you're gonna have,
Speaker 3: We're gonna be a billionaire.
Speaker 2: Ain't gonna it ain't gonna.
Speaker 3: Hurt to you know, Girey, Yeah, man, But that's what
Speaker 3: I'm talking about. It's these things that happen that you
Speaker 3: get exposure at a young age and you don't realize
Speaker 3: the impact that it had. That's the reason why I've
Speaker 3: always been the type that I leave with an open
Speaker 3: hand to give kids. I remember we were growing up
Speaker 3: they say, if you can see it, you can achieve it,
Speaker 3: you know, And so that we used to say that
Speaker 3: in kindergarten a lot, and growing up in the hood,
Speaker 3: growing up in very low economic environments, taught me that
Speaker 3: I don't have to be the product of my environment.
Speaker 3: And so when I see a young kid, I'd be like, hey,
Speaker 3: and these kids know so much so quickly. If they
Speaker 3: know how to play some of these advanced games, on
Speaker 3: the iPad. They can clearly learn how to do some
Speaker 3: switching on some cameras work for them. So that's how
Speaker 3: I look at it. Let's just jump into y'all's love story,
Speaker 3: all right. Y'all celebrated ten years of marriage in February.
Speaker 3: This February of twenty twenty six was ten years Caulationngratulations, congratulations,
Speaker 3: And just I didn't know what y'all lived in so
Speaker 3: many different.
Speaker 2: States, oh man, So let me go back to that.
Speaker 3: Y'all met in New York and then how many times
Speaker 3: did y'all move from states?
Speaker 2: How many states did y'all experience living together?
Speaker 1: So we met New York. Yes, it's actually a cute
Speaker 1: little story, all right, all right, So it was it
Speaker 1: was it was a dark ready night.
Speaker 9: It was.
Speaker 1: Street in Harlem.
Speaker 4: Yeah, before we get there. Hold on, I was traveling
Speaker 4: from Knarsi to Harlem. And for those who've been to
Speaker 4: New York, you guys know how long that community. This
Speaker 4: is hour plus. My phone had actually died, completely died,
Speaker 4: like it was damage. It just it just wasn't gonna work,
Speaker 4: you know it Stow's the iPhone And I was really
Speaker 4: upset because on the train, like that's that's my piece
Speaker 4: is to listen to music, listen to the audio books,
Speaker 4: you know, podcast something, and I didn't have it, and
Speaker 4: I was so upset. So I had to go a
Speaker 4: whole hour and a half on the train with all
Speaker 4: the you know, the different stuff on the train.
Speaker 2: I want to say too.
Speaker 4: But then I ended up getting off on the wrong
Speaker 4: stop and it was raining, so I had to walk
Speaker 4: to one twenty five. I out of want sixteenth. I
Speaker 4: got to walk to one twenty fifth in the rain.
Speaker 4: I'm upset, and I went to the AT and T store.
Speaker 4: That's when John Cy was working. And when I got in,
Speaker 4: actually I was upset.
Speaker 3: I was.
Speaker 4: I was an irate customer. I got in, I saw
Speaker 4: there was a que I saw my name. Seemed like
Speaker 4: people was playing around and before, like years ago, I
Speaker 4: used to work at AT and T store myself. So I'm
Speaker 4: looking at it and I'm like, dang, these people, ain't
Speaker 4: you know.
Speaker 2: I'm like, come on, man.
Speaker 4: By the time she came to me, I saw her,
Speaker 4: and I mean I thought she was was pretty, but
Speaker 4: I was I was like, I don't care about that,
Speaker 4: You're about to get this work. So I was I
Speaker 4: was pretty, you know, just very direct with her, and
Speaker 4: she was was like very kind, you know, she was
Speaker 4: just kind of smiling at me and laughing. And I
Speaker 4: ended up, you know, kind of just you know, kind
Speaker 4: of pressing, and she ended up saying something to me,
Speaker 4: and it caught me off guard and I was like
Speaker 4: hold on. I was like, you being condescending and she
Speaker 4: was like no, and she gave me a big old
Speaker 4: smile and I was like, man, I'm tripping.
Speaker 2: I'm being a jerk right now.
Speaker 4: And so I said, you know, I got to reset this.
Speaker 4: I gotta figure this thing out. Because then she went
Speaker 4: to the counter and she was kind of fixing my phone.
Speaker 4: There was some music playing, and I saw her kind
Speaker 4: of swaying back and forth doing a little dance right.
Speaker 1: A little shoulder behind, a little it was a little
Speaker 1: little hip action, a little little bit she was.
Speaker 4: She wasn't like full on dancing, but it was, you know,
Speaker 4: she was just enjoying herself, like she was having fun.
Speaker 4: And I looked at her and I was just like wow,
Speaker 4: like she is. God, I need to change this around.
Speaker 4: I started thinking to myself like how can I how
Speaker 4: can I somehow get this number because I'm tripping and somehow,
Speaker 4: so she came back and I said, you know, I
Speaker 4: was looking at her and I was like, hey, you know,
Speaker 4: is there any way that you know, we could uh,
Speaker 4: you know, like talk about something, you know, work together
Speaker 4: or something, because I was doing like a podcast and
Speaker 4: I was doing a blog at the time, and I
Speaker 4: told her about the blog and she said that she
Speaker 4: had been doing articles and she was also an editor.
Speaker 4: So I was like, hey, is there any ways that
Speaker 4: I could you know, get your number or something like
Speaker 4: that so you can maybe work together on my website.
Speaker 2: She was like yeah, sure.
Speaker 4: But in the midst of all this, this is the
Speaker 4: crazy thing that happened. In the midst of all this,
Speaker 4: I heard a word that came to my spirit and
Speaker 4: it was family. And I knew it was something that
Speaker 4: I had to pay attention to. And so I stopped
Speaker 4: as I was trying to you know, transition and get
Speaker 4: her number, and I said, you know, where are you from?
Speaker 4: Where are your people from?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 4: Cause I'm thinking, is she family? Is God telling me
Speaker 4: that this is my cousin? I need to stop.
Speaker 2: So you know, you know, I'll asking we're people from?
Speaker 4: And she's telling me, you said North Carolina And I'm like, Noah,
Speaker 4: my people ain't from there, and so I'm like okay.
Speaker 4: So anyway, I ended up trying to, you know, get
Speaker 4: the number, and so I asked her for her information.
Speaker 4: She gave me a business card, and so I asked her,
Speaker 4: I said, you know, is this your number? And she
Speaker 4: was like, yeah, it's my number. I was like, is
Speaker 4: this like your business number or your number and she
Speaker 4: was like no, it's my number, and so I said okay,
Speaker 4: So but also I want to I want to also
Speaker 4: like pause because she gets up substantized because I say
Speaker 4: my side, but she doesn't tell her side. So what
Speaker 4: was happening to you while we were doing all day?
Speaker 2: So?
Speaker 1: Actually I was supposed to leave. So that's why I
Speaker 1: say God brought us together because I'd been there from
Speaker 1: the morning. I was supposed to leave hours before that,
Speaker 1: but I stayed to help out. And then you know,
Speaker 1: it was like really he came in like right at
Speaker 1: closing times. I was like this dude walking in, And
Speaker 1: so when the customer service girl came to ask me
Speaker 1: if I could help somebody, I just kind of peeked
Speaker 1: out and I was like, oh, he's kind of cute.
Speaker 1: I am. I'll just stay in hell. I need some
Speaker 1: extra money anyway. So but then I went out, you know,
Speaker 1: after I got my little iPad and everything, I went
Speaker 1: out and as I started to walk towards him, I
Speaker 1: saw like this golden orange glow around him. Really yeah,
Speaker 1: and I'd never seen that before, and I'm like, I'm
Speaker 1: supposed to help him for some reason. It like, even
Speaker 1: when I talk about it now and re kind of
Speaker 1: imagining that in my mind, I get chilled sometimes. But
Speaker 1: you know that's why I say God, for some reason,
Speaker 1: God was speaking to both of us in different ways
Speaker 1: in that moment. It was it was orange and golden,
Speaker 1: and it was amazing just all around him. And then
Speaker 1: I go up to him and he's.
Speaker 3: All, so, so you were around when I grew up
Speaker 3: about the movie Last Dragon where he had got yeah, yeah, glow,
Speaker 3: But I didn't know.
Speaker 4: I wouldn't focus on none of that, that's right.
Speaker 3: And so how did that transition from that meeting at
Speaker 3: her job to something greater?
Speaker 4: Yeah? So I ended up calling her and you know,
Speaker 4: setting up a time for us to get together. And
Speaker 4: when we first we we said, we you know, have
Speaker 4: go to dinner, right, But I didn't know if it
Speaker 4: was a date or not. And and you know, I
Speaker 4: don't think she knew if we didn't know if it
Speaker 4: was a date or not, but I know that, uh
Speaker 4: you know, when I arrived, she had me waiting for
Speaker 4: a little bit. At least it was an hour, so.
Speaker 1: You know, I take a little time to get ready.
Speaker 2: God, so I felt like I was was.
Speaker 1: Also a little test, like, let me see if he
Speaker 1: can tolerate that.
Speaker 4: Usually I felt like I was being tested, so I
Speaker 4: was like, let me just be chilled. You know, she
Speaker 4: came down. I didn't know it was a date until.
Speaker 2: I saw her. So you were sitting outside, sitting car,
Speaker 2: waiting for an hour? For an hour? Was it really
Speaker 2: an hour? Yes?
Speaker 5: Not?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't And before that, I said, hey, there
Speaker 1: was a store on the other side of town and
Speaker 1: that sells the seasoning that I really liked. And I
Speaker 1: don't have a car. I knew he had a car.
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, before you come, can you just
Speaker 1: pop by the store?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, And it was not even out the way.
Speaker 4: But it was the most random season I ever. I
Speaker 4: had never even heard of this thing, and so I
Speaker 4: had to go look. And it wasn't like obvious. I
Speaker 4: had to go look. I ask people like I was like,
Speaker 4: so it took me a minute, but I was just like,
Speaker 4: why am I even doing this?
Speaker 2: But you still got there and then had to wait, Yeah,
Speaker 2: with the store still wait.
Speaker 4: So I was like, oh, but I'm thinking, like I
Speaker 4: don't know if this is professional or not. And so
Speaker 4: I'm just you know, I'm a studious person, and I'm like,
Speaker 4: if you give me a task, I task oriented, So
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go do the thing. So I was just
Speaker 4: sitting there, but I was thinking myself, am I playing
Speaker 4: myself right now?
Speaker 2: Like what that's about? Maybe just be patient to figure
Speaker 2: this out.
Speaker 4: But then when she when she came down, oh man,
Speaker 4: and I saw the way she looked, I was like, okay,
Speaker 4: this is a date. Uh. She had like a white top.
Speaker 4: I forgot the texture. I'm gonna say, cashme or what.
Speaker 4: I don't know what the texture was, but it was
Speaker 4: this white top. And it was just because when she
Speaker 4: at the store, she'd have no makeup on. She was
Speaker 4: like wearing baggy clothes, so you couldn't really you know,
Speaker 4: you knew she was a beautiful person, but you couldn't tell.
Speaker 4: But when she came out and she you know, oh man,
Speaker 4: I was like, oh man, this, Yeah, this is definitely
Speaker 4: a date, and so.
Speaker 2: I don't know what. So we end up going to
Speaker 2: the restaurant and then afterward as.
Speaker 4: To the movies, and then we were in the movie together,
Speaker 4: uh you know, he getting clothes and things like that.
Speaker 4: And the thing that I remember the most was just her.
Speaker 4: She was kind of motioning, you know, towards me, and
Speaker 4: she kind of had her hair kind of you know,
Speaker 4: hit me in that little bit and I was just like, man,
Speaker 4: I was like, man, this is this is a moment.
Speaker 4: And then we had our first kiss in the theater
Speaker 4: and I just I still remember it to this day,
Speaker 4: like it still gives me chills, like thinking about it,
Speaker 4: because right after we got done kissing, I remember just
Speaker 4: looking I was like, I'm in trouble.
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm in trouble. This is why was
Speaker 2: you in trouble?
Speaker 4: Because I could just see like I wasn't going nowhere.
Speaker 2: You're talking from that moment, you knew that.
Speaker 4: From that moment, I was like, this is different. This
Speaker 4: is something that because at the time, and I say
Speaker 4: this about our us getting together because we both in
Speaker 4: our thirties, is that we had our eyes wide open.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 4: We have been through you know, I've been through a
Speaker 4: previous marriage, I had kids. Uh you know, Johnsy was
Speaker 4: just you know, a single person, but had been you
Speaker 4: know through.
Speaker 1: You know, dating in New York City for a black woman,
Speaker 1: it's not easy, not theiest.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: We let me ask you, as we said, as a
Speaker 3: black woman, what's the difference in New York.
Speaker 1: Well, it just seems harder for us because you know,
Speaker 1: there's there's there seems to be a lack of compatible
Speaker 1: black men for us. That's how I felt, and a
Speaker 1: lot of my friends felt when we were in our
Speaker 1: twenties dating it was really hard. And then the ones,
Speaker 1: you know, the the fellas that were out there, they
Speaker 1: just they just went to play the field. And you know,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm in finance and doing all this stuff, and
Speaker 1: they just wanted to, you know, be reckless. And so
Speaker 1: it was really hard finding a mate. So when I
Speaker 1: met Charles, I was like I had kind of given
Speaker 1: up at that point. I'm like, it is what mind
Speaker 1: I was. I was even from a young age. I
Speaker 1: was just it's so funny because when I was a teenager,
Speaker 1: God put on my spirit that I would have a
Speaker 1: business with my husband. I would have a husband and
Speaker 1: we be working together. Really yes, it's.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we want to get back to that God just God,
Speaker 3: just that.
Speaker 1: He really is. And I didn't grow up in the
Speaker 1: church or anything like that. I didn't, uh you know.
Speaker 1: I went to church occasionally with my family on Easter.
Speaker 1: That was an extent. But I always, you know, I
Speaker 1: would pray, and you know, pray through a lot of
Speaker 1: you know, a lot of things. But that was always
Speaker 1: something that had been on my spirit. And then as
Speaker 1: I got older and older into my thirties, I was
Speaker 1: just like, Okay, maybe maybe this isn't you know, maybe
Speaker 1: this isn't meant for me.
Speaker 3: All right, And so in the movies, you got your
Speaker 3: first kiss and you you you locked in, you like,
Speaker 3: You're like, this.
Speaker 2: Is this is this is it for me?
Speaker 4: Yeah, we were pretty much insuperable.
Speaker 2: After that was your marriage mind?
Speaker 4: Uh no, uh socause I already already did that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so after that, you just said I'll never get
Speaker 2: married again. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Before I met her, I was just like, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: do my my George, George Clooney, you know at the time,
Speaker 4: you know, he was like the you know, the old guy,
Speaker 4: the bachelor, right, So I was like, yeah, I'm gonna
Speaker 4: do that basket exactly. I was, I'm gonna do that,
Speaker 4: like I was, you know what I'm saying, and and
Speaker 4: and so I had my my feel if you will. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I knew that I want, you know, something serious, But
Speaker 4: I just I wasn't like trying to you know, find
Speaker 4: I wasn't actively pursuing anything. I wasn't you know, looking,
Speaker 4: you know, and I wasn't praying about it. I was
Speaker 4: just like I was just like, you know what, God,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go ahead and just you know, be the
Speaker 4: best version of myself.
Speaker 2: That's what I was. That's what it was.
Speaker 4: I was just working on me, just trying to be
Speaker 4: the best version myself. And that's all I was focused on.
Speaker 4: And so when that happened, like that kiss happened because
Speaker 4: it rearranged my whole thought because I went from from being,
Speaker 4: you know, I'm gonna be a bachelor to now and
Speaker 4: be like I got to marry this.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh God, how did you know that? Johnsy?
Speaker 2: You know, he just switched that quick was he did?
Speaker 2: He started acting different.
Speaker 1: Well, you know what after after that first date and
Speaker 1: maybe after like a couple of weeks we did we
Speaker 1: like he said, we were inseparable. I was always at
Speaker 1: his place. We were always together. I just you know,
Speaker 1: I stopped hanging with my friends as much, and we
Speaker 1: just spent so much time.
Speaker 3: To get you'll spend so much time together that you
Speaker 3: got pregnant six month later.
Speaker 7: Shout out to c J.
Speaker 2: That's how you.
Speaker 1: Didn't know.
Speaker 7: Get married first?
Speaker 4: He had a question. I think he's done the matthe
Speaker 4: yet It's like.
Speaker 1: We're celebrating ten years of marriage and I'm ten. Put
Speaker 1: that together.
Speaker 3: And so at what point, so y'all got had this
Speaker 3: whirlwind love where y'all six months in get pregnant, and
Speaker 3: then at that moment that you start saying, who brought
Speaker 3: up the conversation about marriage at this point? Because because
Speaker 3: Charles wasn't thinking about marriage.
Speaker 1: Well, I think after I got pregnant, then yeah, he
Speaker 1: was like, okay, we have to because he's always been
Speaker 1: very mature. He's a very mature person. He's very you know,
Speaker 1: he's just like a little old man.
Speaker 2: I've been called.
Speaker 1: He's super wise and super smart. So I think he
Speaker 1: just kind of put the puzzle pieces together, like okay,
Speaker 1: maybe because you know what, it's funny. God probably handed
Speaker 1: that too, because I don't know if we it may
Speaker 1: have taken us a lot longer to get married if
Speaker 1: that hadn't happened. That because I was still kind of
Speaker 1: like on the fence of like, you know, you know,
Speaker 1: still kind of thinking in the back of my way
Speaker 1: back in my mind, marriage wasn't going to happen for me.
Speaker 1: Even though we were having a great time, you know,
Speaker 1: hanging out and getting to know each other and spending
Speaker 1: time together and having deep, wonderful conversations about, you know,
Speaker 1: eventually what we want to do in life, I didn't
Speaker 1: think it's gonna Yeah, I think, like I think, we
Speaker 1: were both at a place where we just enjoying each other.
Speaker 4: And you know, I think because of what we have
Speaker 4: been through, we both had in our mind that this
Speaker 4: could be short. Just at any moment, this can end.
Speaker 4: And we were okay with that because I think, yeah,
Speaker 4: because I mean, it's eyes wide open. We were very
Speaker 4: mature about it, like we we knew that, you know,
Speaker 4: like we we both had passed, you know, we we
Speaker 4: we weren't people who were necessarily like lacking interest from
Speaker 4: other people, you know, like I know, John c is
Speaker 4: a highly sought after person, you know, what.
Speaker 2: She is now she's always been bad.
Speaker 4: She always been bad, right, I mean, so I know
Speaker 4: she had suitors. I know all types of people wanted
Speaker 4: it right and you know I do, Okay, right, So
Speaker 4: I wasn't.
Speaker 2: I wasn't lacking for.
Speaker 4: No hard feelings, no hard feelings, and so you know,
Speaker 4: it wasn't. And that's why I think we were able
Speaker 4: to kind of just resting in the relationship because we
Speaker 4: were clear about who we were and what we had,
Speaker 4: and we had options and we knew that, but we
Speaker 4: kept choosing each other. That's the thing that I was
Speaker 4: just like so like amazed by is that every day
Speaker 4: and no matter what situation it was, we kept choosing
Speaker 4: each other. And so when that when when she got pregnant,
Speaker 4: it wasn't like oh man, you know, it was like okay, it.
Speaker 3: Was like, oh, she doesn't trap me trying to blame
Speaker 3: her when you're the one that was participating. We tried
Speaker 3: to blame the woman for them getting pregnant.
Speaker 4: It was not.
Speaker 2: Eyes for this.
Speaker 4: But we know the day it happened, okay, because it was.
Speaker 2: That it was that kind of day. So right, Yeah,
Speaker 2: we had a good time.
Speaker 1: So you know Father's Day.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So she was like she I don't want to
Speaker 4: say everything that happened, but but it was very intentional
Speaker 4: and she wanted to celebrate me and we had a
Speaker 4: great time.
Speaker 2: A few weeks later we re member Father's Day. The
Speaker 2: other day we'd be like, boy, we had a time.
Speaker 1: It was very intense, very it was very very you.
Speaker 3: Want to celebrate him and so and so it was
Speaker 3: an understanding. It was cool. You were just like, hey, listen,
Speaker 3: we're choosing each other every day. She's pregnant, I'm finna
Speaker 3: choose her.
Speaker 2: When did that?
Speaker 3: When did God bring back to your mind that word
Speaker 3: that dropped in your spirit?
Speaker 2: Family? Wow?
Speaker 4: So as we recording, obviously I let her know that
Speaker 4: I had kids.
Speaker 2: How many kids? You have three?
Speaker 4: I have three, three daughters from a previous marriage. They're
Speaker 4: all grown now. So I got twenty five, twenty two,
Speaker 4: and twenty and so, you know, she was aware of
Speaker 4: that and she was okay with it. As we you know,
Speaker 4: once she got pregnant, we wanted the kids to meet her,
Speaker 4: and she came and flew out and met the kids,
Speaker 4: and then she met my mom and my family and
Speaker 4: just my family's from California. They were in Cali, so
Speaker 4: I was in New York, Sacramento. And so as she
Speaker 4: kept meeting people, like the way that they just fell
Speaker 4: in love with her in a similar way that that
Speaker 4: I did. And the thing about it is like as
Speaker 4: soon as we got together, and I don't want to
Speaker 4: get into too much of this, but no one really
Speaker 4: knew about her when I was in New York. But
Speaker 4: shortly after we got together, God started to make it
Speaker 4: so that I would be able to come back and
Speaker 4: be with my girls because the previous relationship wasn't it
Speaker 4: wasn't great, and so there was I just do a
Speaker 4: lot of traveling. So I would travel back to California
Speaker 4: when I was Miami, when I was in New York,
Speaker 4: I'd be traveling back every month or two to go
Speaker 4: see them, right, And that was something I was constantly.
Speaker 4: I was working two three jobs. I was constantly doing that.
Speaker 4: Did it around that time that we got together, Uh,
Speaker 4: they're my kid's mother. They she decided that, you know,
Speaker 4: why don't you come back and let's try to do
Speaker 4: some co parenting kind of thing.
Speaker 3: And so back Wet City, Sacramento, Sacramento. So you're going
Speaker 3: coast to coast, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4: And so when we got together, it just all started
Speaker 4: kind of happening, and I started I was like, God,
Speaker 4: this this, this is, this is this is kind of crazy.
Speaker 4: As soon as I get with her, all of a sudden,
Speaker 4: now you know, I'm able to come back.
Speaker 2: You know, we're we're going to work things out.
Speaker 4: And just a lot of my relationships started getting better too,
Speaker 4: like just healing, and and then and a lot of
Speaker 4: another crazy thing that happened as soon as we moved
Speaker 4: back and we're doing the cold parenting thing. I ended
Speaker 4: up getting a principal job in Sacramento. Then I got
Speaker 4: a principal job in Stockton, which is nearby a Sacramento.
Speaker 4: I'm at the school in Stockton, and while I'm at
Speaker 4: the school in Stockton, someone comes up to me and says, hey,
Speaker 4: you know, I know your mom. And I'm like, uh, mom,
Speaker 4: like you know, and I'm thinking my mom, my stepmom?
Speaker 2: Who actually, who's my mom?
Speaker 4: Who raised me? My mom? My biological mom. I didn't really,
Speaker 4: you know, grow up with like that. And so I'm like,
Speaker 4: who are you talking about? And then long story short,
Speaker 4: ended up being her my biological mom. She somehow found
Speaker 4: out that I had moved to Stockton and I was
Speaker 4: a principal at the school met that knew that girl
Speaker 4: and I was her principal, this little girl that was
Speaker 4: you know. And then when she met my logical mom,
Speaker 4: met my wife, the way they hit it off, it
Speaker 4: was just like all this stuff kept happening, like you know,
Speaker 4: like just family from everywhere, and it was all like
Speaker 4: I could see Johnsy was like at the root of
Speaker 4: it because she would be bringing people together, she'd be
Speaker 4: telling me to call people, she'd be connecting things and
Speaker 4: it's just like, so yes, the family word that has
Speaker 4: been like she's been that since the whole ten years,
Speaker 4: like I've I'm closer than anyone everyone because of her.
Speaker 2: You see what God did.
Speaker 3: God drop that word in your spirit at the first
Speaker 3: encounter of her, and then God began to heal your bloodline.
Speaker 3: He allowed you to start establishing family with john Z
Speaker 3: and then started healing. You're talking about your biological mama,
Speaker 3: who you didn't have a relationship with at all, now
Speaker 3: comes back into your life because your ex wife is
Speaker 3: now welcoming you back with a co parenting situation across
Speaker 3: the country.
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying. It was.
Speaker 4: It was amazing, Yes, and every I say every year
Speaker 4: God reminds me of that word and who Johnsy represents
Speaker 4: because even when things are you know, you know, family
Speaker 4: is sometimes scenes get get a little questionable. John Cy
Speaker 4: is that person that constant for me who's been like, hey,
Speaker 4: give them a call, give them a text, let's try
Speaker 4: to reach out. Let's you know, let's do something.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: So you know, yeah, and were you very close with
Speaker 1: your family?
Speaker 7: Your family is all you're from.
Speaker 1: The So I was raised in New York and my
Speaker 1: mom I was raised by a single mother. I didn't
Speaker 1: have a father growing up. So that's part of the
Speaker 1: reason why I, you know, wanted to be with Charles
Speaker 1: because in my mind, I always growing up as a kid,
Speaker 1: I would be like, oh, if I had a dad,
Speaker 1: he would do this and this, and you know, wanted
Speaker 1: a father figure. And I have a stepfather who's been
Speaker 1: kind of in and out of my life since I
Speaker 1: was a child, who's for some reason I was an
Speaker 1: adult who's more consistent in my life. But I didn't
Speaker 1: really have a father. And so when I saw how
Speaker 1: he was with his girls, how much he loved them,
Speaker 1: and just you know, those are like his little princesses,
Speaker 1: and how wonderful they were because of him, I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, this is who I want to have children.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So, but yeah, being raised by a single mom was
Speaker 1: not easy. It was just, you know, family was not
Speaker 1: really like a strong a strong point, especially after so
Speaker 1: when I was fourteen, my brother was murdered by the
Speaker 1: police in Tulsa, Oklahoma, and so that kind of really
Speaker 1: shook our family. It was really, you know, super devastating,
Speaker 1: and I don't think we ever really healed from it
Speaker 1: as a family. And so hearing him say that, you know,
Speaker 1: I know the importance of all those connections and being
Speaker 1: in each other's lives, So you know, that's why, that's
Speaker 1: why I wanted him to pursue those relationships as best
Speaker 1: he could.
Speaker 2: That is beautiful.
Speaker 3: And so after how long did it take y'all to
Speaker 3: get married after y'all got pregnant?
Speaker 4: Months?
Speaker 2: Right? I mean yeah, yeah, So we got.
Speaker 1: We met in January and then found out I was
Speaker 1: pregnant like the fall, and then we got married in
Speaker 1: that following February the next year.
Speaker 3: So from a literally a year from meeting each other,
Speaker 3: y'all got married.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and we've been inseparable like that even year. We
Speaker 4: kind of sometimes count that year that you know, we
Speaker 4: were just dating because we just were always together, like
Speaker 4: you know, it just it seemed like we just were
Speaker 4: locked in. M hm.
Speaker 3: And so what did your parents say on both side
Speaker 3: when you said, hey, I'm pregnant and hey we're married.
Speaker 1: Who my mama was? She was because she's old school,
Speaker 1: you know. She She's like, he better marry you.
Speaker 7: What's going what's gonna happen?
Speaker 1: She was like, I'm gonna have a shotgun, Like you
Speaker 1: don't have to do that, you know, it's it's fine,
Speaker 1: it's gonna happen.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, I'm my family. So my mom who
Speaker 4: who I really was? You know, who mattered to me
Speaker 4: the opinion of the matter the most. My stepmom, but
Speaker 4: my mom when she met her, and my mom is,
Speaker 4: you know, very spiritual. She's the spiritual core of the
Speaker 4: entire family. She told me, she said, she said, son,
Speaker 4: because I've had a lot of bad relationships in the past,
Speaker 4: some stuff that not only broke my heart, but my
Speaker 4: mom's heart. Because you don't want to see me hurt.
Speaker 4: And so, you know, we we kind of together agreed
Speaker 4: that I probably should just stay single, like you know,
Speaker 4: and my mom told me, she's like, you know, it's
Speaker 4: going to take a very special woman.
Speaker 1: She tells me that he's going to take a special woman.
Speaker 4: I think that even though you know, you can kind
Speaker 4: of see it that way, but I didn't take that
Speaker 4: as this because he's.
Speaker 1: Just very particular. You know, he's very particular. He's very smart,
Speaker 1: so he needs someone to kind of, you know, be
Speaker 1: his intellectual equal. And you know, he's just and he
Speaker 1: needs a lot of love because he has a big heart,
Speaker 1: and people a lot of times take advantage of that,
Speaker 1: even in business. They do. So it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: I have to be his protector in business too.
Speaker 4: So so she said that, and I knew that. And
Speaker 4: then when she met her, she said, she said that
Speaker 4: that woman loves you. She said, she said, son, she
Speaker 4: loves you, and I could tell you that no matter
Speaker 4: what happens, you know, she gonna stay with you, right,
Speaker 4: it's gonna be okay. So when she gave me that, yeah,
Speaker 4: you cause my mom, he's fiercely in tune, you know
Speaker 4: what I mean. And actually, you know my mom, I
Speaker 4: don't want to say about the past, but it wasn't
Speaker 4: the same reaction for anybody else. She never said that
Speaker 4: about anybody else, So when she met Johnsy in particular,
Speaker 4: she was like this and that's what's important.
Speaker 2: She knew to say it that way.
Speaker 4: This woman loves you because there's been other times, I
Speaker 4: think when I was in situations where you know, people
Speaker 4: might have gotten me for different reasons, but but the
Speaker 4: core of it like being that love. And when my
Speaker 4: mom says love, because my mom she represents family, she's
Speaker 4: the core. She's the one that she's the glue. I
Speaker 4: think her and Johnsy have the same understanding of what
Speaker 4: that means. It's that unconditional kind of love. And I
Speaker 4: was just telling Johnsy the other day that, like, she's
Speaker 4: the only person in my life that actually reminds me
Speaker 4: of what unconditional love is because when I when I
Speaker 4: was growing up, there's so many people that get divorced
Speaker 4: in different things, and you know, like you start tripping like,
Speaker 4: hey dude, like I ain't got to put up with this.
Speaker 4: That's how I was raised, you know, in a lot
Speaker 4: of ways. And so with her though, it's it's never that,
Speaker 4: you know, it's like, hey, okay, we can we can fight,
Speaker 4: we can argue, we could do whatever. The end of
Speaker 4: the day, we're gonna stay together, Like that's not that's
Speaker 4: not an option. And my mom is like that too.
Speaker 4: My mom is like, she's she's a die hard, but
Speaker 4: she loves you. She loves hard and she's committed, and
Speaker 4: so you know, she recognized that with Johnsy and so yeah,
Speaker 4: you know family and my mom was like, yeah, this
Speaker 4: she she loves you. I said, okay, I want to
Speaker 4: also mention too that while we were dating and recording,
Speaker 4: her family was advocating for her. John Z's family and
Speaker 4: her friends. I never I've never been in a situation
Speaker 4: like this. Anytime I got, you know, getting serious to somebody,
Speaker 4: you know, you meet their family, their friends or whatever.
Speaker 4: They'll tell you about the person. You kind of get
Speaker 4: a sense. This was the only time I ever experienced
Speaker 4: was people were advocating, saying like, you got a good one,
Speaker 4: this girl right here, don't mess this up. They were
Speaker 4: like and not on some cliches that they were like,
Speaker 4: she is a really good person.
Speaker 2: And I'm surprised you around this long.
Speaker 4: You know, I'm surprised you still like, I'm surprised how
Speaker 4: many months, Like, I'm.
Speaker 1: Surprised, Oh it was. It was. I was very superficial.
Speaker 1: I was superficial. I had like one of those stupid
Speaker 1: lists of like qualifications and stuff like that. But it
Speaker 1: was Yeah, but that I think that was a sign
Speaker 1: of everything that led me to him, because none of
Speaker 1: that mattered anymore. It was like his heart and who
Speaker 1: he is as a person was just like, So explain that.
Speaker 3: I want you to unpack that, because that's a good
Speaker 3: thing to talk about. You had this list, and you
Speaker 3: qualified the list by being superficial. You said, I was
Speaker 3: very superficial. But then when you start speaking about you
Speaker 3: speak about Charles from Whiles, talk about the core values,
Speaker 3: the soft skills that he has. He has a good heart,
Speaker 3: he's very loving, he's very this. So was your list
Speaker 3: absent of that?
Speaker 1: No, I mean I was very attracted to him.
Speaker 2: I'm talking of your original list.
Speaker 3: When you say superficial, why do you call that list superficial?
Speaker 1: Because I think I had an image of who I
Speaker 1: wanted to marry in my mind. I had, like, you know,
Speaker 1: this picture of you know who we're little girls thinking
Speaker 1: of like, oh, Prince Charming, and so over time that
Speaker 1: Prince Charming turned into what my ideal husband would be,
Speaker 1: and so I mean it was just.
Speaker 2: Ridiculously.
Speaker 3: I think it's interesting because a lot of women think
Speaker 3: like that, but men don't.
Speaker 2: I ain't never met a man that thought like that. Like,
Speaker 2: men don't have.
Speaker 7: Like I had this list, well no not.
Speaker 3: Not A lot of people can fit the list. So
Speaker 3: it's not like y'all have an image in your brain.
Speaker 3: It's not like we go, she has to look like this,
Speaker 3: she has to be this hype, this skin tone, this whatever, this.
Speaker 3: It just be like she just gotta be a good one.
Speaker 3: She gotta be fine, like like that, like she gotta
Speaker 3: be fine.
Speaker 2: What does that mean?
Speaker 3: It's whatever he determines fines with the multiple women he
Speaker 3: may meet. Women be having a picture in their brain.
Speaker 3: And when you don't fit that, like you don't hear
Speaker 3: men talk about she got to be this height, she
Speaker 3: gotta be that, don't.
Speaker 2: We don't do that. Women do that all all the time.
Speaker 3: So that's why I want to know when you had
Speaker 3: this list and you and you called it superficial, what
Speaker 3: made you create that? Because you talked about starting off
Speaker 3: as a young girl, where we hear prince charming and
Speaker 3: prince charming if we focus on even that name, he's
Speaker 3: just charming. But it's like in the in the physical
Speaker 3: attributes of them, we just start creating this and then
Speaker 3: you hear this whole. I remember I had we had
Speaker 3: Coras on the podcast and she made the comment that
Speaker 3: he just has to be five nine, What do you say?
Speaker 2: Five ten? He has to be at least nine as
Speaker 2: at least five to nine, And.
Speaker 3: So she put that on and everybody was like, I
Speaker 3: mean they just going in about five. And then you
Speaker 3: had a lot of women saying, oh, yeah, at least
Speaker 3: five nine because she's a taller woman. But you would
Speaker 3: just hear them argue with that. Men don't get that specific.
Speaker 8: Maybe not as specific, but I've certainly heard some men
Speaker 8: be like, I like her at least five five, five
Speaker 8: to five seven, I like brown eyes.
Speaker 3: Like I.
Speaker 4: Think okay, I would say I would say if a
Speaker 4: man said something about likely it has something to do
Speaker 4: with something physical. I mean, just to be real, like
Speaker 4: like for me, like I say, it wasn't to me
Speaker 4: about like how tall a woman was. It was for
Speaker 4: me like if I got if I came and wrap
Speaker 4: my arms around you. You know what I'm saying, do
Speaker 4: we match? You know what I'm saying doesn't line up right?
Speaker 4: That that's the kind of thing, And so that could
Speaker 4: be different heights. I don't know what the height is,
Speaker 4: but like or you know, some things like for I say,
Speaker 4: from my perspective, it was like when I hold your hand,
Speaker 4: you know, how does it feel when I hold your hand?
Speaker 2: How does it feel when we do certain things?
Speaker 4: And so when all that came together, that's.
Speaker 2: I think a lot of women think men are more superficial.
Speaker 7: Than y'all short girls, short girls.
Speaker 3: But then also they tall, they will they're not They're
Speaker 3: not that specific.
Speaker 2: They're open.
Speaker 3: They may have a preference and say I prefer this.
Speaker 2: But I also take this, and women be like this, Yeah,
Speaker 2: we be like we like this. I'm telling you, I've
Speaker 2: been a man my whole life.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but when I'm talking about the men were talking
Speaker 3: about you were an and meaning that they would date
Speaker 3: you if you look, they'll also date another girl that's taller.
Speaker 8: You think women women are like because do I think
Speaker 8: that women may have a type or they may have preferences,
Speaker 8: but because the way that we're wired emotionally, right, I
Speaker 8: think actually men are created to be more like If
Speaker 8: they're not attracted to you in the beginning, it probably
Speaker 8: is going to be that. But because of oxytocin in women,
Speaker 8: I find that we can fall for more than just
Speaker 8: the physical if.
Speaker 2: You allow it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because y'fore Yeah, but I just let the man
Speaker 3: talk to you, like attracted to Every time I've had
Speaker 3: people on the podcast with women, they said that he
Speaker 3: was initially not my preference, and I decide to date
Speaker 3: outside of what I used to go for all the time,
Speaker 3: and then that's where they found their husband. Every single
Speaker 3: time I talked to some about it, they'd be like, yeah,
Speaker 3: to typically I wouldn't have done this, and I said,
Speaker 3: let me go ahead. I got tired of dating these
Speaker 3: type of guys they ain't worked out. So I gave
Speaker 3: this guy a chance and experienced the greatest love they've
Speaker 3: ever experienced.
Speaker 2: But they had to get away from this list that
Speaker 2: they've had.
Speaker 3: Uh. They had to get away from whatever they told
Speaker 3: themselves through all the books that they've read, through all
Speaker 3: the podcast whatever they've listened to in their life that
Speaker 3: had formulated that mindset.
Speaker 2: They had to undo somethings.
Speaker 8: I can name a couple of your guy friends I
Speaker 8: want right now that have made the same kind of
Speaker 8: woman and gotten the same kind of married.
Speaker 2: I keep saying Mary married. They didn't work dating. I
Speaker 2: don't know nobody.
Speaker 1: Else, I'm going to have their men have their lists.
Speaker 4: I'm sorry I had yeah, so I'll say for for me,
Speaker 4: like because at the time, like I said, it wasn't
Speaker 4: look I wasn't looking for a list. It was about qualities.
Speaker 4: It was about always so like.
Speaker 1: To say that at that time. But I'm sure what
Speaker 1: he was when you were in your marriage.
Speaker 4: About exactly, Okay, I told Okay, we had a lot
Speaker 4: of I had a lot of choices, A lot of choices,
Speaker 4: a lot of short, tall, I had lots of different races,
Speaker 4: Like I didn't all that didn't matter, you know, it
Speaker 4: was because I exactly I'm not doing that. It was okay,
Speaker 4: but but but it wasn't that. It was the moments
Speaker 4: that I had with with that person, right and if like,
Speaker 4: would you like I said that that first kiss, like
Speaker 4: I ain't had I didn't know, it ain't no light,
Speaker 4: but that nothing happened to me like that with anybody
Speaker 4: else but you. So when that happened, that's when I
Speaker 4: was like, Okay, this is different. I'm in trouble, you
Speaker 4: know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: Like, think about he said the first date, you ain't
Speaker 3: even gave him none yet, and he thought that a
Speaker 3: kiss that.
Speaker 2: Is so innocent a kids.
Speaker 3: So that's why I want women to hear that so much,
Speaker 3: because men want moments, they want that peace, they want
Speaker 3: to feel that safety.
Speaker 2: The first word he said in his mind that came family,
Speaker 2: not baby Mama. Didn't.
Speaker 3: He didn't get in his mind and be like, oh ya,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna hit that. That's gonna be great, that's all.
Speaker 3: The first thing I thought is that he said family.
Speaker 3: Where that word come from?
Speaker 2: Is this my kim folk. I need to kind of
Speaker 2: figure out what this is. I don't want to get,
Speaker 2: you know, caught up with one of my cousins or something.
Speaker 3: So he started feeling this sense of safety and family
Speaker 3: is a word that's supposed to bring safety to you,
Speaker 3: and most men always say they want peace. It's like
Speaker 3: you'll see a one and you've seen it. You may
Speaker 3: see somebody walking around with a woman and he'd be like,
Speaker 3: how she get him? You're like, she must got some money,
Speaker 3: you know, she must got this. And then if you
Speaker 3: ever talked to him, be like, no, this woman, I've
Speaker 3: never felt more peaceful, I've never felt more seen.
Speaker 2: And you'd be like, oh, and.
Speaker 4: To add on to what you're saying, like when we
Speaker 4: were dating, just hearing from her family talk about how
Speaker 4: a great woman she was. They weren't saying, oh man,
Speaker 4: you got a bad one.
Speaker 2: She fine.
Speaker 4: We already knew that. Everybody knew that. It was about
Speaker 4: her character. It was like who she was, you know,
Speaker 4: her work, ethic, like all these different things. These are
Speaker 4: the things I'm looking for because you know, I'm thinking,
Speaker 4: you know, I want to build an empire with somebody.
Speaker 4: You know, if I'm gonna do it, if I'm gonna
Speaker 4: stop being a bachelor and I'm gonna stop doing this,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna build with someone. And so all the things
Speaker 4: that they told me about her, you know, how smart
Speaker 4: she was, all the different stuff. I was like, yeah,
Speaker 4: this is it. Like, because you know, you said, you
Speaker 4: know you want someone you looked at me like someone
Speaker 4: that would be you know, compatible in terms of you know,
Speaker 4: raising your children. Yeah, the same thing I'm thinking, like
Speaker 4: this is almost spend the rest of my life with.
Speaker 4: You know, she I and Johnson can laugh together like
Speaker 4: that was the thing to our marvel, that we would
Speaker 4: spend all day together and wouldn't get tired of each other.
Speaker 2: No, she was just talking about that. Yeah, we just
Speaker 2: sit up there and do that. We'd be sitting at.
Speaker 3: The half the house of watching Now she got me
Speaker 3: watching suits.
Speaker 2: I'm late to the game.
Speaker 3: I think.
Speaker 1: Keep We don't talk about that enough, like more married
Speaker 1: couples don't talk about how you can just well, you
Speaker 1: really know it's the one for you, you can still
Speaker 1: the whole day with us.
Speaker 7: I always just say we're on the same wavelength. You're hungry,
Speaker 7: I'm hungry. You want to go do this. I want
Speaker 7: to go do this. You want to watch this. We're
Speaker 7: gonna go work. We're gonna work like we just laptops.
Speaker 2: Watching TV.
Speaker 4: COVID was one of the best things for us, and
Speaker 4: I thought it was one of the best tests of
Speaker 4: our marriage because we saw a lot of people that
Speaker 4: but when we got together like that, we got to
Speaker 4: hang out with each other all day, all the time.
Speaker 4: Oh man, it was like, you know, that's how we
Speaker 4: gain all this stuff. We was chilling and we really
Speaker 4: enjoyed that. And I think that we fell more in
Speaker 4: love because we're like, man, we really understand each other
Speaker 4: and we're and the thing is, we're completely different people,
Speaker 4: you know, we are not We don't think about things
Speaker 4: the same way, like but but we have such a
Speaker 4: deep love and respect for each other that, you know,
Speaker 4: like it doesn't matter what happens, like you know, that's
Speaker 4: this is my person, you know.
Speaker 8: Yeah, And for clarity, I will say, women, I believe
Speaker 8: we have more on our checklist by far. It is
Speaker 8: way Even studies show that it's harder for a woman
Speaker 8: to say yes to a second date. Usually if a
Speaker 8: man just has like a fine time with you, he
Speaker 8: enjoyed the conversation.
Speaker 7: He'll be like yes.
Speaker 8: Women will be like, I can't see it. He doesn't
Speaker 8: meet the you know, so we have far more. But
Speaker 8: all I'm saying is I don't think that men are
Speaker 8: without criteria without yeah, so I'm just if.
Speaker 7: We're waiting the scale for sure.
Speaker 8: Women, I think we have we have more on our lists,
Speaker 8: but men are not without lists.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, we have a list, but we have a list.
Speaker 3: But it's ambiguous. It's like, she gotta look good. What
Speaker 3: does that mean? At least look good to him. It's
Speaker 3: not that she has to be a specific height, it
Speaker 3: has to be this, she has to be it's not
Speaker 3: specific men. Are you other think men aren't more specific?
Speaker 3: Like that we're just more ambiguous? Why women be like,
Speaker 3: what do you want? Does he really want? He literally says,
Speaker 3: I just want to woman I can I'm attracted to
Speaker 3: that I can sleep with and be turned on by.
Speaker 2: And you be like, what is that?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll tell you one other thing too, when we
Speaker 4: were when we were dating, I'm.
Speaker 3: Talking about marriage, not somebody. He just you just smashing dashing. Exact,
Speaker 3: you're gonna go for the high level just to smash
Speaker 3: and dash, But they don't mean nothing.
Speaker 2: Marriage.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it gets a little bit more looser as far
Speaker 3: as the.
Speaker 2: What you call the preferences.
Speaker 3: It's just gonna go back into I want somebody to
Speaker 3: be a good mother to my kids, somebody that that
Speaker 3: that is peace. That's why all social media away talking
Speaker 3: about pe piece piece piece piece.
Speaker 8: But I also hear men say like if this is
Speaker 8: gonna be the one woman that I have forever, like
Speaker 8: the yeah.
Speaker 2: What does that mean?
Speaker 8: But sometimes yeah, I think also it depends on appetite
Speaker 8: what they've been exposed to. I think some men are
Speaker 8: really not trying to set themselves up for failure, and
Speaker 8: so they do put a little emphasis on making sure
Speaker 8: that like this is some of those things that I
Speaker 8: know that I quote unquote fall for I want to
Speaker 8: make sure I'm getting so that I don't fall out
Speaker 8: of this in LUSS.
Speaker 3: So this is what happens a lot, and this is
Speaker 3: the truth, and women get mad about it. They go,
Speaker 3: he married this type, but he keeps liking this on
Speaker 3: social media.
Speaker 2: He keeps it seems like he likes this type.
Speaker 3: And the bottom line is that he married what he
Speaker 3: married because that was safety. Yes, he has to get
Speaker 3: healed from some of those toxic attractions that he may have,
Speaker 3: but what he chose that he could spend life with
Speaker 3: may sometimes not being congruent with what you see as
Speaker 3: the stuff he's liking on social media. So you see
Speaker 3: that a lot and you be like, why is he
Speaker 3: liking this? Why are you? Because they be in arguments
Speaker 3: with each other. I've had people in the podcast say well,
Speaker 3: why are you liking this?
Speaker 2: And he's like, I mean, yeah, she looked good, but
Speaker 2: I married you. And then they get mad and be like,
Speaker 2: but why you like that.
Speaker 3: He's like, I still got os, but I married you.
Speaker 3: And that's what I believe. The tension is when I
Speaker 3: say this to women, they may not understand there's a
Speaker 3: different category that men put wives in and women that
Speaker 3: he put that he just smashed in and that is
Speaker 3: two distinct categories, and women confused themselves to be like,
Speaker 3: but he married this, and be like, yeah, he spent
Speaker 3: his life with that. He gave that to his name.
Speaker 3: The other stuff he never married, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: And so it's like, just look, it's just proof is
Speaker 3: in the pudding on there.
Speaker 4: So one of the things as I was deciding, you know,
Speaker 4: it is just something I'm gonna do, and I was,
Speaker 4: I was, I was torn because, you know, having fulfilled
Speaker 4: marriage before, just feeling like maybe this wasn't meant for me,
Speaker 4: but then meeting her and then kind of being in
Speaker 4: this whirlwind of like, oh man, this, this is this,
Speaker 4: this is gonna happen probably, But should I do this?
Speaker 4: I remember talking to, you know, one of the mentors
Speaker 4: that I had at the time. I asked him older
Speaker 4: gentlemen who had been married for a long time. I
Speaker 4: asked him, you know, like what should I do? And
Speaker 4: so he said, I'm gonna give you this piece of advice.
Speaker 4: He said, if you ever find a woman that's too
Speaker 4: good to be true, marrier. And so as I started
Speaker 4: to think about it, and I thought about John Cy,
Speaker 4: and I thought about you know, of course she's beautiful,
Speaker 4: she's amazing, so that that check. But then I thought
Speaker 4: of all these other things, you know, these intangibles, all
Speaker 4: these other things about her, and then the family word
Speaker 4: and all that, and then the people talk and it's
Speaker 4: just so much going on. That was like, this is
Speaker 4: too good. We were hanging out, were chilling. She ain't
Speaker 4: She's not like you know, she's not you know.
Speaker 2: Like high maintenance. She don't. You know, she didn't.
Speaker 4: Care if I whinding dined her or if we didn't
Speaker 4: matter what we did.
Speaker 2: As long as we were together. She was having a
Speaker 2: good time.
Speaker 4: And it was it wasn't like, you know, its just
Speaker 4: I was just like, this is so amazing, Like how
Speaker 4: is this even happening? Like and I found you and
Speaker 4: we met this way, and so it said to me,
Speaker 4: this is too good to be true. And once I
Speaker 4: realized that it wasn't, it wasn't. Shortly it was shortly
Speaker 4: after that put a ring on her. I proposed to
Speaker 4: her like right after, cause I was like, I need
Speaker 4: to make sure that this stays in my life. And
Speaker 4: that was it for me.
Speaker 2: I need to make sure this stays in my life.
Speaker 3: When I said, you said that, look at she look
Speaker 3: at she melted over.
Speaker 2: You get you doing that father's dance? Coming in? She
Speaker 2: just stared at him.
Speaker 3: But that's the truth, and that's what I want men
Speaker 3: to understand, is that that moment, you don't want to
Speaker 3: ever let it go. When I made that phone conversation,
Speaker 3: I made that phone called the Ashley that last week
Speaker 3: of February of last year, I told her, I said,
Speaker 3: it's got to be more like I told her straight up,
Speaker 3: I said, you gonna have to get rid of me
Speaker 3: because I'm finna put a full court press on you
Speaker 3: like you gonna have I done experience what I experienced
Speaker 3: when I and it was just a dream that I
Speaker 3: was like, I could see my life with her. I said,
Speaker 3: but we just friends. I don't even we ain't even
Speaker 3: we haven't even went on a date. At that point,
Speaker 3: I said, I am going to do a full court
Speaker 3: press on you and we finished just figure out what
Speaker 3: this is.
Speaker 2: But it is that moment of saying that I see.
Speaker 3: A person that can be in my life forever and
Speaker 3: I want to see what that's like. And I didn't
Speaker 3: want to sabotage it. I didn't want to. I didn't
Speaker 3: want to man, explain it. I said, Wow, you don't
Speaker 3: really know it. She live over here, she in California.
Speaker 3: You there, how you're gonna make that work? She ain't
Speaker 3: never All the stuff you can build up in your mind,
Speaker 3: you can build up monuments in your mind to make
Speaker 3: you believe it can't happen, or you can say not
Speaker 3: my will, let I will be done. Guy, I'm gonna
Speaker 3: go and whatever obstacle presents itself, we're gonna jump right
Speaker 3: on over it.
Speaker 2: We're gonna just keep jumping over it.
Speaker 3: And that's what But that's the part that a lot
Speaker 3: of men and I just want to encourage men to
Speaker 3: take the challenge of your masculinity and your manhood is
Speaker 3: to make a decision. Ashley's favorite definition of the word
Speaker 3: the decision.
Speaker 2: What is it to decide is what.
Speaker 7: To cut off all other options?
Speaker 2: Yes, cut off all other options.
Speaker 3: That's what the side is and what a lot of
Speaker 3: men do, which shoot me and my boy was in
Speaker 3: the same situations, like you don't have to decide. You
Speaker 3: can just date multiple women for as long as that
Speaker 3: lasts and then and there's always gonna be a new woman.
Speaker 3: Or you can sit there and say no, I'm gonna
Speaker 3: cut off all options and I'm gonna marry this one.
Speaker 3: And that's the part that men aren't honest. We had
Speaker 3: the couple that's on this week's episode, The Davis Is.
Speaker 3: She said, Monica said that she was dating this guy
Speaker 3: in Houston, and the guy said she started talking to
Speaker 3: him about being exclusive, and he said, why would I
Speaker 3: be exclusive with one woman when I live in Houston?
Speaker 3: He said, there's too many women here. Why would I
Speaker 3: do that? He just said it straight up. She's like, well,
Speaker 3: I gotta respect his honesty. He said, why be with
Speaker 3: one woman? And that's unfortunately what a lot of men
Speaker 3: believe because they don't understand the challenge of being with
Speaker 3: one woman. You're gonna have to go through life with
Speaker 3: that person and vice versa. There are decisions that's going
Speaker 3: to be made that it takes y'all collectively to come.
Speaker 2: To those decisions. But it's easy to be like, oh,
Speaker 2: that's too hard, Let me just go find somebody else.
Speaker 2: Let me date this person, date this person.
Speaker 3: So when you do life with somebody, those are some
Speaker 3: real decisions. How did you make the decision from going
Speaker 3: from New York and then y'all went, did y'all not
Speaker 3: moving back to California.
Speaker 2: Yep, we back.
Speaker 4: It was the co parenting opportunity that was there, so
Speaker 4: to be with my daughters more often. And you know,
Speaker 4: John cy was was was game for that.
Speaker 2: Were y'all married at that time.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we had just got married and she was pregnant.
Speaker 4: So we drove across the country.
Speaker 1: No j was three months old.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we just had him, and so we.
Speaker 2: All drove all away from New York to California.
Speaker 1: He sure did. He was superman during that drive too,
Speaker 1: because that desert three days.
Speaker 4: Yep, but we did it. We did it like, you know,
Speaker 4: twelve hours.
Speaker 1: And then we did it when we moved back to
Speaker 1: when we went to.
Speaker 2: Twelve hours at a time.
Speaker 4: That's what it is, you know, the twelve hours you stop,
Speaker 4: you rest somewhere and doing nothing. Twelve That's how I
Speaker 4: looked at it, you know, like I was going to work.
Speaker 1: He's like very task oriented, like plan he's the planner.
Speaker 1: That's I love them too.
Speaker 7: Nature you were a good tea.
Speaker 2: So y'all moved all the way there, and how long
Speaker 2: do y'all stay there?
Speaker 1: So we agree that when because I didn't like Sacramento,
Speaker 1: it's lovely, it's a lovely place. But being from Harlem.
Speaker 8: Place and I'm from the state, I'm from the great
Speaker 8: state of California, so I overstand.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and people don't understand too. California is a big state.
Speaker 1: I was born in l A, but raised in New York.
Speaker 1: We left when I was like six or seven.
Speaker 7: Were born what city in l A, l A l A,
Speaker 7: l A, l A not not Yeah, No, in l A.
Speaker 1: I was born at u C. L A Hospital. But
Speaker 1: a lot of people don't understand that living in so
Speaker 1: cal is very different from North cal And when you're
Speaker 1: from Harlem and you're used to being around I was
Speaker 1: raised around black activists. My mom was an editor at
Speaker 1: you know, a black newspaper in Brooklyn, So I'm just
Speaker 1: used to being immersed in blackness.
Speaker 8: This explains the Oakland activists connection.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we got a lot of those connections because actually
Speaker 4: I was I was raised in all parts of California.
Speaker 4: I used to live in l A too. I was
Speaker 4: in the Crenshaw area. I went to fifty nine Street
Speaker 4: Elementary School.
Speaker 2: People that know know in terms of what that was.
Speaker 4: But you know, uh, and I've lived all these tarp places.
Speaker 4: I was doing activism and getting into that. So that's
Speaker 4: when I was doing the website. The website was actually
Speaker 4: about like, uh like it. It's called Social Intellects, and
Speaker 4: it was about like activism and you know, basically uplifting
Speaker 4: those intellectuals that are out there that are you know,
Speaker 4: really really championing like you know, social justice causes. And
Speaker 4: that's what it was about. And so we talked about that.
Speaker 4: She was like, oh yeah, all right, about stuff like
Speaker 4: that and you know, edit stuff and so yeah, we
Speaker 4: had that connection.
Speaker 2: That's dope, that's a lot of interest. So then y'all stayed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so we were in Sacramento and we agreed that.
Speaker 1: I was like, look, Charles, there's just not enough blackness.
Speaker 1: So what are we going to do about that? So
Speaker 1: we said, okay, when the youngest girl, his youngest daughter
Speaker 1: turns eighteen, then we'll move someplace else. So it was
Speaker 1: between Houston or back to Harlem, or Atlanta. So we
Speaker 1: landed on in Atlanta.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and y'all been living in Atlanta how long?
Speaker 1: For three years?
Speaker 3: Now?
Speaker 2: Yea?
Speaker 7: How do you like it?
Speaker 1: Oh? We love it because there's a lot of blackness.
Speaker 1: It's so funny.
Speaker 8: One of my cousins said, I like Atlanta because it's
Speaker 8: like living in Wakanda.
Speaker 1: It really is. It really is. When we first moved there,
Speaker 1: our youngest son, Malcolm, was like, we were in a
Speaker 1: Kroger in the grocery store and he looked around. He
Speaker 1: was like, Mommy, are these our cousins? Because we had
Speaker 1: never seen that many black people before because at his school,
Speaker 1: he was the only class.
Speaker 3: You know, was that c J.
Speaker 1: That's that was Yeah, that sounds like, all right, we're
Speaker 1: in the right place.
Speaker 3: It's hilarious and so y'all, so when did you stop
Speaker 3: teaching in Atlanta?
Speaker 4: No, I stopped teaching, uh in New York. So I
Speaker 4: got promoted from a teacher to a dean. You know
Speaker 4: that happens a lot, actually knows that, Like, you know,
Speaker 4: when you're a really good teacher, they promote you to leadership.
Speaker 4: So I became a dean and then became a principal.
Speaker 4: And really what that was about just impact, Like you know,
Speaker 4: I was able to impact you know, the thirty kids
Speaker 4: in front of me. I wanted to figure out a
Speaker 4: way to impact the school in the community. And so
Speaker 4: that's why I became principal.
Speaker 1: Was award winning teacher.
Speaker 4: Thank you, that's right.
Speaker 1: Yes, he was the ward the highest mass scores in
Speaker 1: Miami's middle.
Speaker 4: It was the gains. Yeah, not not so so you know,
Speaker 4: you know how it is so like the people who
Speaker 4: got the highest scores, those the sexy numbers, those were
Speaker 4: the people they were touting. I had the highest gains.
Speaker 4: So the kids that I had, they gave me all
Speaker 4: the kids that did not pass.
Speaker 2: The state tests.
Speaker 4: They would have the lowest scores, and so for for
Speaker 4: those kids, a lot of those kids end up passing,
Speaker 4: but it wasn't like ninety percent of them didn't pass.
Speaker 4: It was like maybe seventy some percent, but they started
Speaker 4: off at like zero percent. The other people who got
Speaker 4: the notoriety, they had kids where eighty percent of them
Speaker 4: had already passed, and then they knocked them up to
Speaker 4: eighty five or ninety percent pass right, So that gain
Speaker 4: is only really ten percent.
Speaker 2: Mine is a lot larger.
Speaker 7: Had the greatest growth.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so even as a principal in Stockton, he really
Speaker 1: transformed those kids' lives because he had That's what reason
Speaker 1: why he left the principalship, because it was really stressful
Speaker 1: for him because he wanted to do so much at
Speaker 1: that school. He got the new uniforms. He was trying
Speaker 1: to build a soccer film. He instituted e gaming.
Speaker 2: And just started.
Speaker 1: He was a principal. Yeah, so he left education when
Speaker 1: we were in when we were in Stockton.
Speaker 8: But yeah, I just want to celebrate you because, like
Speaker 8: you said, I don't want to gloss over the fact
Speaker 8: there's not a lot of black men in education and
Speaker 8: a lot of I think the rhetoric around that is
Speaker 8: like why would a black man go teach? But that
Speaker 8: is one of the most powerful physicians.
Speaker 7: That a black man can be in.
Speaker 8: So I just want to salute you because you know, I,
Speaker 8: as an all boys teacher, would say that I thought
Speaker 8: I did well, but I certainly the few black men
Speaker 8: that we had that were at the school, I can
Speaker 8: honestly say that their physical presence at the school did
Speaker 8: so much for those boys that I taught. It was
Speaker 8: the difference between like we'd be like sitting star and
Speaker 8: they would sit like this for me, but when that
Speaker 8: black man walk in, they'd be like do you. And
Speaker 8: so our kids even just shine when they have the
Speaker 8: presence of like a black man in that space. So
Speaker 8: I just want to salute you for that, and just
Speaker 8: any man that's thinking about like should I do should
Speaker 8: I Should I be a part of education?
Speaker 7: Should I become an educator?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 7: Yes, do it. It's a great job. It's a great career.
Speaker 8: And women, please, when you see men in education, celebrate them.
Speaker 8: Don't tell them that you want them to be something
Speaker 8: else or that's not good enough for you, or that's
Speaker 8: not a good career choice.
Speaker 7: Because it's an excellent career.
Speaker 2: You must need a career choice.
Speaker 3: Yeah, absolutely, absolutely So Atlanta, y'all and Atlanta.
Speaker 2: Now and y'all were how did.
Speaker 3: Panda Commission come to play and explain what Panda Commission is?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay.
Speaker 4: So so when I was a principal and you know,
Speaker 4: we were deciding that, you know, possibly I need to
Speaker 4: look at something else. Because it was March twenty eighteen,
Speaker 4: March twenty nineteen, I was in the er do distress.
Speaker 4: So the second time that it happened, my wife she
Speaker 4: you know, she's you know, when you got this hospital bed,
Speaker 4: she's like, listen, we can't lose you to a job,
Speaker 4: like you know, you got to do something else. You
Speaker 4: were stressed like that, stressed like that because you know
Speaker 4: it's it's you got to understand, like you know, I
Speaker 4: was to stop right here, Jonesy what you just had
Speaker 4: a flashback?
Speaker 2: What was that? Oh?
Speaker 1: That was all the stories of things that were happening
Speaker 1: to him when he was a principal, of all the
Speaker 1: resistance he was getting, of all the you know, it
Speaker 1: was just it was overwhelming.
Speaker 4: It was a lot. It was a lot. You know,
Speaker 4: you when you focus on the kids, and you know this,
Speaker 4: when you focus on the kids and you center them
Speaker 4: and their needs and make everything about them, there's some
Speaker 4: people who have, you know, objections to that. They want
Speaker 4: you to keep the status quo. They want you to
Speaker 4: kind of keep things where they are. These kids were brilliant.
Speaker 4: These kids had so much that they could do, and
Speaker 4: I wanted to expose them to more. I wanted them
Speaker 4: to you know, we had kids that would routinely at
Speaker 4: the time only apply to state schools. Those kids were
Speaker 4: good enough to go to Stanford in Berkeley and Ivy
Speaker 4: League schools, and so I made sure they did that.
Speaker 4: But in order for me to make sure that path happened,
Speaker 4: I had to to change things in structures and processes
Speaker 4: and connections and different things like you know, like I
Speaker 4: had connected with people to do like flying programs, you know,
Speaker 4: like for like Princeton and Penn and things like that.
Speaker 4: You know that kind of stuff. Someone has to to
Speaker 4: see that and also make it happen. And so I
Speaker 4: was doing a lot of things that were focused on
Speaker 4: the kids only, and not that I was disregarding the teachers,
Speaker 4: because I know that if you have a great teach
Speaker 4: the teachers are happy, you have happy kids, right, So
Speaker 4: I was also investing in them as well, but I
Speaker 4: think they weren't used to, and you know, is uncommon
Speaker 4: the expectations and how you go about like really pouring
Speaker 4: into people and even investing in them.
Speaker 2: If they're not.
Speaker 4: Ready for it, yeah, they could push back a lot,
Speaker 4: you know what I mean. Like even if you try
Speaker 4: to like try to bring family along and you know,
Speaker 4: you trying to help out your little brother or something
Speaker 4: like that, you like, hey man, this is how you
Speaker 4: do X y Z, and they ain't ready, they gonna
Speaker 4: push back on you.
Speaker 8: Because it's more. It's more than just having a career.
Speaker 8: You really have to give your life to the work.
Speaker 8: So you have to think about yourself as kind of
Speaker 8: like an activist because this whole idea of like work
Speaker 8: life balance, like it doesn't yeah, I live for my kids,
Speaker 8: So I totally understand and have seen that. You know,
Speaker 8: even just with education shifting that you know, prioritizing kids solely,
Speaker 8: there is like you know, some and not saying solely,
Speaker 8: but just there can be some pushback because people are like,
Speaker 8: hold on, I don't know if COVID I think did
Speaker 8: some of this too. People are very in tune with
Speaker 8: like the balance of it all, and they want to
Speaker 8: leave by a certain time. And so when you're coming
Speaker 8: with the spirit of like anything for yeah, yeah, anything
Speaker 8: for the kids.
Speaker 4: I got it from Teach for America because you know,
Speaker 4: it's like, you know, student centered, you know, like what's
Speaker 4: best for the student. Yes, if you if you shift
Speaker 4: the perspective of whatever you're whatever you're doing in your classroom,
Speaker 4: whatever it is, if you shift the perspective to what's
Speaker 4: best for the student and not what's best for me
Speaker 4: as the adult or what do I feel like doing
Speaker 4: or what you know?
Speaker 2: Am I like?
Speaker 4: If you shift that, then you you there a lot
Speaker 4: of the whole world opens up in terms of what
Speaker 4: you know it should be possible and could be possible.
Speaker 4: And since I was the principal and I had the resources,
Speaker 4: we we actually were, you know, the school that had
Speaker 4: the most money in the whole network, and but a
Speaker 4: lot of people didn't know that, and we weren't using
Speaker 4: the resources I felt like in the best way to
Speaker 4: center the kids. And so when I started to do that,
Speaker 4: I think people just weren't you know, weren't weren't used
Speaker 4: to that. So it was stressful to have to keep
Speaker 4: advocating and keep explaining that, you know, especially because it's like, man,
Speaker 4: I'm trying to I'm trying to do everything I can.
Speaker 4: Can't y'all see this, and so it was just really hard,
Speaker 4: and so you know, you get you get stressed.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 4: I actually I didn't even know what it was until,
Speaker 4: you know, I'm starting to have these like you know episodes,
Speaker 4: you know, and I'm just like, I gotta go to
Speaker 4: the hospital, like I'm tripping.
Speaker 2: You went to the hospital twice.
Speaker 4: Twice, Yeah, yeah, just like your heart was racing. Yeah,
Speaker 4: I found out I had high blood pressures. That was
Speaker 4: the first time if you found out out was was
Speaker 4: because of something like that. Because things were so stressful,
Speaker 4: you know, I ended up like I think one time,
Speaker 4: I felt like I had like a panic attacker. So
Speaker 4: I don't know what it was like, you know, how
Speaker 4: to describe. Only it wasn't a heart attack to call.
Speaker 4: It was the call of mild or something. I don't
Speaker 4: know what it was, but anyway it was, it was
Speaker 4: it was to the hospital, and I knew that, you know,
Speaker 4: I was highly stressed out, and so we needed to
Speaker 4: to pivot. And so our first pivot actually was John
Speaker 4: cy I taught our boys how to read at the
Speaker 4: age of two, both our boys, right exactly.
Speaker 7: Talking about I was like, what child, Yeah.
Speaker 2: God, my boy, you know, And I'm the teacher. I'm
Speaker 2: the educator.
Speaker 4: But she's at the house and she's teaching them, and
Speaker 4: I'm and I'm looking at this.
Speaker 2: And I'm like, these boys two years old over here
Speaker 2: reading me books.
Speaker 4: This is crazy. And so at the time when we transitioned,
Speaker 4: the first business was actually in home preschool because I
Speaker 4: was like, well, you taught our boys how to read,
Speaker 4: and I know how to run a school, so why
Speaker 4: don't we just combine these efforts and just help out
Speaker 4: more kids. And so we opened up and you know, initially,
Speaker 4: I'll tell I'll say, and this is the story we
Speaker 4: always tell, but initially it was crickets. When we first
Speaker 4: opened up. It was crickets because we were doing traditional marketing.
Speaker 1: We were Walmart handed out, I got a pre school.
Speaker 1: I'll teach you how to read it all that.
Speaker 3: It was like.
Speaker 4: So I started, I said, I don't know if people
Speaker 4: search for childcare this way, like I think they just
Speaker 4: go online.
Speaker 2: He probably go to Facebook or something.
Speaker 4: So at the time, actually, the whole time I was
Speaker 4: a principal, I was studying digital marketing on the side.
Speaker 4: I always been someone who knew how to build websites
Speaker 4: and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: And I was rebranded his school too.
Speaker 2: That was one of the first things I did.
Speaker 1: Yeah, everybody the parents.
Speaker 4: Branded school, got them new gear, outfits all that, like
Speaker 4: make sure everybody was flying because that's if.
Speaker 2: You know what Deon say. You know.
Speaker 4: They pay good, right, So I was like, I want
Speaker 4: everybody to feel like, you know, they look good. So anyway,
Speaker 4: so when it came to the preschool, I was like,
Speaker 4: you know, digital marketing is something that I've been doing
Speaker 4: on the side, and so I looked at all the
Speaker 4: websites in the area, and I looked at how people
Speaker 4: were marketing, and I was like, I feel like I
Speaker 4: could do it better. And so I built a website,
Speaker 4: and I did the marketing and I did like ads
Speaker 4: and things like that, and we went from you know,
Speaker 4: basically having nobody checking for us to having our daycare
Speaker 4: full within weeks and then we had like a forty
Speaker 4: parent like waitless, you know, and then we started helping
Speaker 4: and we were having so many people were referring people
Speaker 4: to other daycares, you know, to help fill them out
Speaker 4: because the needs were there, but people just didn't trusted
Speaker 4: and they didn't they didn't they didn't have something. I'll say,
Speaker 4: it's a brand that they could trust, right, and so
Speaker 4: they saw the website, they saw the brand, and they
Speaker 4: saw the marketing. And then the thing is, I knew
Speaker 4: it if they were come in the house and they
Speaker 4: saw Johnsy and we had you know, some fresh baked
Speaker 4: cookies in the back, and we had it laid out
Speaker 4: the way it's supposed to because we had a two
Speaker 4: story and our bottom floor was a total daycare.
Speaker 2: So I made it look like a school.
Speaker 4: We had different sections, differentiating instruction, we had different things.
Speaker 4: Our backyard was decked out. So I knew if they
Speaker 4: could just come and see what we had, they would,
Speaker 4: you know, sign up. And sure enough, man, people start
Speaker 4: coming and.
Speaker 2: They walk in.
Speaker 4: They was like, oh my god, you got Johnsy there
Speaker 4: smiling at them and tell them how you know, She's
Speaker 4: gonna love on they child and you know, and provide education.
Speaker 4: And then our boys are there and they're three years
Speaker 4: old and reading. They was like, oh yeah. So we
Speaker 4: had people signing up left.
Speaker 1: And right, and then COVID happened and shut us down.
Speaker 4: That's what shut us down. And actually I was at
Speaker 4: the time, so we when we got shut down, we
Speaker 4: actually had a good time.
Speaker 2: The first two weeks we got back to us.
Speaker 4: It was just me and my wife and we was
Speaker 4: chilling and you know, but I realized. I was like, man, hey, babe,
Speaker 4: we ain't got paid. And she was like, what you
Speaker 4: gonna do about that? And I was like, man, it's
Speaker 4: been two three weeks.
Speaker 2: She's like, ye, what you're gonna do about it?
Speaker 4: Like man, So I went upstairs and I was on
Speaker 4: my laptop and I was I was praying, asking God
Speaker 4: what should I do? And actually at the time, I
Speaker 4: was redesigning a friend's website because I didn't like the
Speaker 4: way it looks. I was just bored, and God spoke
Speaker 4: to me, said, you're doing it now. You know, he said,
Speaker 4: this is what you do. And so I went and
Speaker 4: made a Facebook post and and put out that, Hey,
Speaker 4: I'm building sites, I'm building funnels. I'm just you know,
Speaker 4: and next thing, I know you our first month.
Speaker 2: We did five figures.
Speaker 4: Shortly after that we ended up being subcontract to do
Speaker 4: some websites for funnels for Eric Thomas, the Hip hop Preacher.
Speaker 4: And then once that's once people started knowing that we
Speaker 4: were behind that, you know, that was the start of.
Speaker 3: Paying yep PANDIC commission. And I've had my experience working
Speaker 3: with y'all.
Speaker 2: Charles is really quick at what he does.
Speaker 3: And shout out to Candace for the introduction to my publicist,
Speaker 3: Candace lab Better, and she was like, Terrris.
Speaker 2: She kept telling me over and over again, you need
Speaker 2: to get your website. Get website.
Speaker 3: I said, Man, people don't worry about website no more
Speaker 3: I care about Instagram.
Speaker 2: I ain't gonna do that, Terrs. Need a website, need
Speaker 2: a website.
Speaker 3: And so she introduced me to y'all and I'm very
Speaker 3: when I said, I'm so particularly like, if we're gonna
Speaker 3: do it, it gotta be right. That's just how I
Speaker 3: look at stuff. And I'd be like, man, Canda Is
Speaker 3: don't want these people, and they whack and they stuff
Speaker 3: be lame. I could have been on. That's what I
Speaker 3: told her, I said, So I started off. I said,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna do it on my own. Forgive you said,
Speaker 3: I need the website off in the building. So I
Speaker 3: built my website, and then she introduced me to y'all.
Speaker 3: I said, look, Charles, up what I did. He' like,
Speaker 3: that's nice. I see where you were going, what you
Speaker 3: were trying to you. I said, hold on, I thought
Speaker 3: this was good. I'm gonna take what you do and
Speaker 3: expand I said, all right, we're gonna see what you're
Speaker 3: gonna do. Man, you sent me that thing. I said,
Speaker 3: that's what I'm talking about. I looked amazed. Matter of fact,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna drop a video right here so y'all can
Speaker 3: see the process of our first call that we had
Speaker 3: and how he took my idea and expounded on my
Speaker 3: imagination and created the website for Student of Love.
Speaker 5: So the Terris, I know that you have been in
Speaker 5: your production studio all.
Speaker 1: Night, but we got to get this website up.
Speaker 5: So I'm went ahead and I called my people, Carls
Speaker 5: and John Z Charles and john Z. Thank you, thank you,
Speaker 5: thank you for hopping on this call with me tonight.
Speaker 1: The situation is we are about to launch his new book.
Speaker 3: I spent the night in my studio last night. I
Speaker 3: came here at noon yesterday. I made Cannibs a promise
Speaker 3: that I will not leave my studio until this website
Speaker 3: is done.
Speaker 2: On call list the white flag, all.
Speaker 3: Right, I'm waving, I'm tapping out. And so she sent
Speaker 3: me a link to your page, to your website. And
Speaker 3: y'all the truth, y'all, y'all, y'all the best, And so
Speaker 3: I bow down. O here, do what y'all do. I
Speaker 3: don't even want to show y'all what I built. Already,
Speaker 3: y'all are the experts in this. Hey, I'm gonna stay
Speaker 3: a student of love. I'm gonna let y'all do what
Speaker 3: y'all do. Let me go home, all right? That is
Speaker 3: that a deal that works? And we got you, Yeah, gotcha.
Speaker 1: You stay in your zonner, genius, and we'll take care
Speaker 1: of it.
Speaker 2: Get out the way and let y'all do what y'all do.
Speaker 5: Height damn good ready and quick question, the y'all fits
Speaker 5: Wi Fi too, because the whole time he.
Speaker 2: Was talking about he has worked so hard.
Speaker 5: I'm trying to get this website up that his whole
Speaker 5: video was stuck with him like this, Can you know
Speaker 5: what y'all's in?
Speaker 2: John Ny?
Speaker 5: Just tell Literarius how he can find y'all online again,
Speaker 5: just in case he needs to remind him how great
Speaker 5: y'all are.
Speaker 4: Yes, you can go to UH Paniccommission, dot com, Panda Commission.
Speaker 4: You can also search us on Instagram at Panic Commission
Speaker 4: that works as well, or Facebook at Pandic Commission.
Speaker 1: So every Pande commission, make sure there's no asset at
Speaker 1: the end.
Speaker 2: How study?
Speaker 1: How pass every great?
Speaker 3: So when you when you when you first took on
Speaker 3: this opportunity to do Student of Love? You know, this
Speaker 3: is my baby, My book was about to come come out.
Speaker 3: How did you approach it?
Speaker 2: So?
Speaker 4: You know, for me, everything that I do is about intentionality.
Speaker 4: And and I recognized too that you were a very
Speaker 4: intentional person as well. And I remember us talking and
Speaker 4: I kind of, you know, do my research. You know,
Speaker 4: I was looking up some of your stuff and I
Speaker 4: already was aware of who you were, but I was,
Speaker 4: you know, doing more, you know, trying to really and
Speaker 4: I realized that you had a keen eye for video,
Speaker 4: like your stuff looks amazing, like this, that's amazing, right,
Speaker 4: And so I knew that I had to be very particular, right,
Speaker 4: and I understood there was gonna be a high level
Speaker 4: of excellence as you were expecting, because that's who you
Speaker 4: were as a person. And so I was just looking
Speaker 4: at a lot of different things. And I also realized,
Speaker 4: to me, it seemed like you had a lot of
Speaker 4: intentionality around the cover and the story that the cover
Speaker 4: was telling. And so I wanted to make sure that
Speaker 4: the site honored that honored that story because for me,
Speaker 4: when you design websites, it's one thing just to get
Speaker 4: it done and get it done quick. That's cool, But
Speaker 4: can you tell a visual story? Can you make somebody
Speaker 4: feel something?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 4: And oftentimes the sites that we create, people don't realize that.
Speaker 4: But sometimes me and Johnson we'll sit back and we'll
Speaker 4: talk about what do we want people to feel when
Speaker 4: they see the site. What are the words that should
Speaker 4: come to their head as they scroll right, And we
Speaker 4: know we got it locked in when we do the
Speaker 4: site and they see it and they start saying the
Speaker 4: same words that we said we were brainstorming, right, But
Speaker 4: that's how intentional we have to be.
Speaker 2: And it doesn't happen overnight. You know, it's gonna take
Speaker 2: some iterations.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, and I think I don't know how
Speaker 4: many you saw, but usually before you even see one,
Speaker 4: we've already done three or four versions of it, just
Speaker 4: to see.
Speaker 2: Three or four.
Speaker 4: That's typically what we do, yes, before you even see it,
Speaker 4: just to make sure that it's something that speaks to
Speaker 4: us because we want to we want to feel it ourselves,
Speaker 4: hoping that when you see it it feels the same way.
Speaker 3: So, Johnsy, what did you think when he presented you
Speaker 3: and told you about Student of Love? What was your
Speaker 3: first concept or idea idea? What did you take away
Speaker 3: from asa were ide eighting with the concept and idea?
Speaker 1: Well, that whole concept was mostly Charles. I am not
Speaker 1: the designer. He is, you know, the brains behind all that.
Speaker 1: But I was really excited and you know, and excited
Speaker 1: for him too, because I know he he's a fan
Speaker 1: of the show, and so that gives him like a
Speaker 1: better connection and under standing. Like a lot of the
Speaker 1: clients we work with, he is already in admiration of
Speaker 1: things that they're doing. So when he creates it's like
Speaker 1: it's with that care and that admiration. So I was
Speaker 1: really excited.
Speaker 4: But Johnson's like my emotional barometer, right she So if
Speaker 4: I'm like if I if I don't know if I'm
Speaker 4: in tune emotionally, I check in with her because her
Speaker 4: her her emotion like she's always in tune. It seems
Speaker 4: like she just has a pulse. And so if I'm
Speaker 4: trying to go for a feeling and I show her
Speaker 4: and she don't get that feeling, then I feel like, Okay,
Speaker 4: I gotta I gotta rework this, right. But if I
Speaker 4: show it to her and she's like whoa and she
Speaker 4: gets to me that feeling, I'm like, okay, likely, yeah,
Speaker 4: so I know what she saw and she was like, yeah,
Speaker 4: that's dope.
Speaker 2: Yeah it was. It was. It was definitely on brand perfect.
Speaker 2: It was. It made me happily bow down and be
Speaker 2: like I down to a great one. Do what you
Speaker 2: do better.
Speaker 1: And that wasn't even like when when you guys had
Speaker 1: your call the first call I was, I was like,
Speaker 1: you know, I could tell how particular you were, you know,
Speaker 1: aside from you know what Charles mentioned before, but I
Speaker 1: knew that you really cared about how your website would
Speaker 1: be presented. Because you care about your community, you care
Speaker 1: about the people reading the book, You care about you know,
Speaker 1: people who are watching your videos and consuming. I could
Speaker 1: feel that on the call with you, so you know,
Speaker 1: I was like, Oh, he's in great hands with Charles,
Speaker 1: but he doesn't even know it.
Speaker 3: He just kept saying, she said, listen, y'all gonna work
Speaker 3: so well together. Matter of fact, before y'all came today,
Speaker 3: she told me today she's like, you're gonna love them.
Speaker 2: They're just so amazed.
Speaker 3: I said, y'all, I'll talk to him on the phone
Speaker 3: for Simon, but they're very open with their story. You're
Speaker 3: gonna truly love them. My publisher when we did the book,
Speaker 3: I was a guy that literally went and bought a desk.
Speaker 3: That desk and the picture and I went and bought
Speaker 3: a desk founded on eBay, drove all the way to Frisco,
Speaker 3: got the desk from this lady who was selling it,
Speaker 3: took it to a studio, took photos of all the
Speaker 3: angles of the desk and said, I'm gonna present it
Speaker 3: to my publisher and say, this is the desk I
Speaker 3: want as the cover. You know, and me and the
Speaker 3: art department was going back and forth the colors. I
Speaker 3: don't want this color, I want this color to the lead.
Speaker 3: The lead of the art director had to get involved
Speaker 3: on my cover because I was just like, I'm not
Speaker 3: liking this, I need this, and she was like, I
Speaker 3: think I know what the Tears wants. So then she
Speaker 3: got involved. It was like all right, let's get it.
Speaker 3: And I was like then I went crazy, like if
Speaker 3: you nail it, you give me what I want. It's
Speaker 3: like because again, I'm an artist, so I'm a graphic designer,
Speaker 3: so I can design stuff. And I'd be like, now
Speaker 3: if I could do it by myself, I don't need you.
Speaker 3: You need to be able to present me something that
Speaker 3: I haven't thought of or I can't do on my own.
Speaker 3: And that's what Panda Commission did with the website because
Speaker 3: I attempted to build a website, which would have been okay,
Speaker 3: but I don't want Hey, I want greatness.
Speaker 2: So I went to the people that could produce greatness.
Speaker 8: So how would you What would you say, I'm sure
Speaker 8: because you're a researcher, Yes, you know your competition. If
Speaker 8: you believe in that, I always say, we are we
Speaker 8: look in the mirror and we are our own competition.
Speaker 8: But what would you say makes you stand out as
Speaker 8: a company and how do you approach building websites in
Speaker 8: a way that really makes you.
Speaker 2: Unique phenomenal question?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would say intentionality. I mean a lot of
Speaker 4: we have been glamored, especially recently by speed, right, And
Speaker 4: I understand everyone says, you know, money loves speed, and
Speaker 4: I get that, and there's there's definitely true to that,
Speaker 4: but there's also something about branding and having something that
Speaker 4: lasts long, and having something that foundationally speaks to who
Speaker 4: you are and what you're about and represents you to
Speaker 4: the fullest. I think we've gotten so used to, you know, this,
Speaker 4: this this culture where everything's so fast and we think
Speaker 4: that everything's so transactional that we don't we don't try
Speaker 4: to do anything with staying power. And so for me,
Speaker 4: when I approach it, I'm approaching it like an artist, right,
Speaker 4: I'm approaching it likes and when it's like, Okay, this
Speaker 4: is this is something that's going to represent this individual,
Speaker 4: represent me too as a creator, represent them, but also
Speaker 4: something that's gonna have impact, We're trying to get it
Speaker 4: to convert. We're trying to get to tell a story.
Speaker 4: We're trying to get it to do all these things.
Speaker 2: I could do it.
Speaker 4: Fast, and it could be transactional. It can have all
Speaker 4: the elements right and have a button that you can purchase.
Speaker 4: But oftentimes, especially when we're doing something that matters and
Speaker 4: we're trying to impact lives, it needs to be more
Speaker 4: intentional than that. And so that's how I approach it.
Speaker 4: And so you know, because I approach it that way,
Speaker 4: not everybody wants that. Some people just wanted to quick fast.
Speaker 4: I know McDonald's got burgers, right, I don't know if
Speaker 4: they sell the best burgers. I don't know if you're
Speaker 4: gonna have the most amazing burger you've ever had. I
Speaker 4: don't know if it's gonna be a burger that's going
Speaker 4: to be memorable that you're gonna talk about or try
Speaker 4: to replicate and at home, it ain't gonna be all that,
Speaker 4: but it's gonna feed you.
Speaker 1: I never want to make a McDonald's burger, you.
Speaker 2: Know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4: But that's the thing I think now, especially when it
Speaker 4: comes to websites and branding andortainthing like that, people just
Speaker 4: want it quick. They just want something and that's cool.
Speaker 4: You can do that, but just understand that that's what
Speaker 4: it represents to the people who are seeing it. And so,
Speaker 4: but what the clients that I work with Oftentimes, they're
Speaker 4: coming to me because they want something different and they
Speaker 4: want something that represents them to the fullest, and they're
Speaker 4: looking at a higher level. They're looking at their brand
Speaker 4: and they're looking at it like longevity because you their
Speaker 4: established brand. They're like, I'm not just gonna have this
Speaker 4: out here just to be you know, especially there're gonna
Speaker 4: bee hundred thousand people looking at it or however, so
Speaker 4: I wanted to connect and so that's why they work
Speaker 4: with someone like me.
Speaker 2: That's good.
Speaker 3: So how was it as we get ready to wrap
Speaker 3: up a lot of people do purpose together, they work together,
Speaker 3: building business together. What was that like with y'all? And
Speaker 3: what was the positive and the negative have been on
Speaker 3: this journey as been co founders Pande Commission, You know.
Speaker 1: What, It's a question I get asked pretty frequently, like
Speaker 1: how is it working with your spouse? Because so many people,
Speaker 1: you know, have this fantasy of working with their spouse
Speaker 1: And sometimes I did, I really did, and you know,
Speaker 1: it doesn't always work out for whatever reason, but it's
Speaker 1: been Initially was very easy for us, and probably because
Speaker 1: I didn't have as much of a hand in Panic Commission.
Speaker 1: And then as the years going on.
Speaker 4: And we started, she was doing the preschool downstairs, and
Speaker 4: then I started panting commission upstairs because after COVID had
Speaker 4: kind of weighed down a little bit, we reopened the
Speaker 4: daycare center. So she was so she was doing it downstairs.
Speaker 4: I was doing panting upstairs. So really it was just
Speaker 4: me starting and then right so.
Speaker 1: I would help them with things like you know, copywriting
Speaker 1: and you know, reviewing things. But you know, for the
Speaker 1: most part, initially it was him, and then once we
Speaker 1: closed the preschool, I I helped and stepped in a
Speaker 1: little bit more, but so much so that, you know,
Speaker 1: I have a few more followers and things like that.
Speaker 1: I'm a bit louder, and you know, I'm more, I
Speaker 1: have more interpersonal skills. He's an introvert. I'm an extrovert.
Speaker 1: I like talking to people. So I would be talking
Speaker 1: to people about Panic Commission, and they would think that
Speaker 1: I'm the owner and I was the one doing the
Speaker 1: designs and stuff like that. And so it got to
Speaker 1: a point where it became really stressful for us because
Speaker 1: you know, people didn't really understand our dynamic and that
Speaker 1: he's really the head of Panic Commission and running the
Speaker 1: operations and managing the team and managing the clients and
Speaker 1: all the you know, designs and everything, and so it
Speaker 1: it came to a contention because people were like, well,
Speaker 1: you know, we got to get john Cy to come
Speaker 1: and speak. We got to get her to speak. I
Speaker 1: want to, you know, talk to John c. She's the head.
Speaker 2: She can help me. Oh yeah, sure.
Speaker 5: And like.
Speaker 1: Do brand audits and all this stuff. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: this is this is charge.
Speaker 4: She wasn't even getting award. People was putting nominar for
Speaker 4: business and I'm like, oh it was, I mean it
Speaker 4: was it was Panda Commission, but it was her name.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And so you know, and then on top of that,
Speaker 1: I'm you know, trying to do things in the house,
Speaker 1: will be mommy and you know, take the kids here
Speaker 1: and there, and then you know, just trying to get
Speaker 1: back to rebuilding myself and you know, now we're on
Speaker 1: this weight loss journey. But I had to step away
Speaker 1: from Panda Commission in order to kind of revisit who
Speaker 1: I am and kind of think about what I want
Speaker 1: to do long term within the company outside of Panda,
Speaker 1: you know, as a mother, because now we're going to
Speaker 1: homeschool our kids. But I had I stepped away from
Speaker 1: Panda commission for like several months.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so you know, to be clear, it was just
Speaker 4: misalignment in a lot of different ways, and I wanted
Speaker 4: I want Johnson to be in the front. She's amazing
Speaker 4: at it. She brings attention, like like I can't. We
Speaker 4: tested this out in different ways, like literally, she would
Speaker 4: do a post that I may have wrote or we
Speaker 4: wrote together and posted, and I would do the same
Speaker 4: exact thing. Hers would blow up in a way and
Speaker 4: minus of crickets right, and we would do this various things.
Speaker 4: We kept testing this out and it was just notable.
Speaker 4: Like Okay, clearly you do want people want to see, right,
Speaker 4: so let's let's try to leverage that. And what happens
Speaker 4: is I think is really Johnsy's heart. You know, she's
Speaker 4: she wants to help, and so people were asking for help,
Speaker 4: and so she wanted to help, and so she would does.
Speaker 9: I see people, you know, And then I had with
Speaker 9: these blag websites, horrible branding and looking like a hot
Speaker 9: mess and I have a heart for black business because
Speaker 9: that's what I grew up around in New York.
Speaker 1: You know, and that's I feel like being a black
Speaker 1: business owner and helping other black business owners is a
Speaker 1: way of acting, just like education as a way of
Speaker 1: activismin this ministry. And so you know, that's how that's
Speaker 1: one way we can rebuild our community as black people.
Speaker 1: And so you know, it hurts my heart when I
Speaker 1: see that. I'll be talking about it. And so she
Speaker 1: looked at website. We'll get you right, we get you right.
Speaker 7: She's I feel so bad. I was like, I'm sorry,
Speaker 7: this is about it's about commission.
Speaker 2: Commission.
Speaker 4: So she'd be saying stuff, and the thing was because
Speaker 4: she was you know, uh, you know, being seen as
Speaker 4: the co founder or as the leader, everything she said
Speaker 4: was pretty much gospel. So when she would say certain things,
Speaker 4: you know, I had to back it up as a company.
Speaker 4: But there were some things that she said that that
Speaker 4: wasn't in alignment in terms of how we actually operated
Speaker 4: or how things were actually done. And so it got
Speaker 4: to a point where, you know, and I tell her,
Speaker 4: I was like, okay, if you if you're gonna do that,
Speaker 4: if you're going to be that person, right because I
Speaker 4: went to you know, I went to Columbing Business coming
Speaker 4: to Columbia Business School, I finished the Chief Marketing Officer program.
Speaker 4: When I first started to do this work, I immediately
Speaker 4: went to school like I didn't like just like a principle,
Speaker 4: like you know, I'm like, okay, I could teach some people,
Speaker 4: but let me make sure i'm educated. Make sure I'm
Speaker 4: educated by the best too. So going to Columbing Business
Speaker 4: School and actually like learning how marketing works and branding
Speaker 4: and all this stuff works, I'm approaching it from a
Speaker 4: different lens. And so I didn't mind her, you know,
Speaker 4: representing us, but I wanted her to represent us to
Speaker 4: the fools and not just be all you know, emotion
Speaker 4: or how she ever she was feeling. Because she said, hey,
Speaker 4: yeah we could do that, and we could do this,
Speaker 4: and yeah you haven't done next week, and I'd be like, whoa, whoa,
Speaker 4: you don't know that we got like four other projects.
Speaker 4: You ain't no way I could deliver that, or if
Speaker 4: I did, it would be like super stressful for everybody.
Speaker 4: So I just wanted that alignment. And so we were
Speaker 4: having some trouble with that because John Cy, she's a
Speaker 4: feeling person.
Speaker 2: So she didn't want to.
Speaker 4: She didn't want me to botto her in in terms
Speaker 4: of be like, hey, don't say that, don't say this,
Speaker 4: don't say that, you know, and I don't want to
Speaker 4: do that. But then at the time, I was like,
Speaker 4: you have to understand, like there's real action that happens
Speaker 4: when you speak, so when you say things or even
Speaker 4: a promotion sometimes she wanted to do it was an
Speaker 4: amazing idea, but I was like, we did that promotion
Speaker 4: right now, and let's say we had ten people sign
Speaker 4: up today and they expecting it.
Speaker 2: We said it'd be done in five days. Ten people like,
Speaker 2: ain't no way.
Speaker 4: And so I would have to put a pause on
Speaker 4: that because you know, we couldn't fulfill that. And the
Speaker 4: thing is, you know, part of your brand is your fulfillment,
Speaker 4: right can you deliver on what you what you said?
Speaker 4: And so I wanted us to have more alignment. And
Speaker 4: so since we couldn't really connect on that in a
Speaker 4: way that that I felt like, I guess we both
Speaker 4: were frustrated because we didn't really see each other, you
Speaker 4: know each other's point at the time, we had to
Speaker 4: do that separation. Well, so we say we had a
Speaker 4: separation in business right, our marriage were strong. This is
Speaker 4: funny thing that happened is that as soon as we
Speaker 4: separated in business right, Johnson was no longer doing things.
Speaker 4: She even went goest online for a while.
Speaker 1: No, I deleted all my social media. Yes, I was done.
Speaker 4: She was like, I've checked out. We actually had a
Speaker 4: really great time in terms of our marriage, like it could,
Speaker 4: you know, because before we would you know, getting little,
Speaker 4: you know, discussions about the business that weren't really you know,
Speaker 4: feeling good. But then once we got back to just
Speaker 4: being us, it was amazing, right, And so then we
Speaker 4: had to really think about it. It's like, okay, is
Speaker 4: this you know, like we got to really figure out
Speaker 4: how can we do this at the same time, because
Speaker 4: one thing that did happen when she was absent was that,
Speaker 4: you know, we were pretty much absent online, right, because
Speaker 4: she is a person that brings the attention. So I
Speaker 4: need her and I need her ideas. And so I
Speaker 4: think now we're at a place now where she understands
Speaker 4: that fulfillment has to connect with ideas, Execution has to
Speaker 4: connect with vision. It can't just be all, you know,
Speaker 4: we just gonna do conquer the world and there's no
Speaker 4: actual plan in execution on how to do that.
Speaker 3: And so now so now her position is brand ambassador,
Speaker 3: correct perfect correct, perfectly with what she enjoys doing, what
Speaker 3: she loves doing, and she can open up social media.
Speaker 2: Back up.
Speaker 1: Last weekend, first week and I've been back, welcome back,
Speaker 1: welcome back to thank you.
Speaker 2: Yes, And I think learning from.
Speaker 4: I think learning from this too, Like I know, I
Speaker 4: got to get out of her way when it comes
Speaker 4: to that.
Speaker 1: It's a balance, just like leaning into each other's guests
Speaker 1: is what it is. Because you know, I have the
Speaker 1: gift of being the extrovert and having all these ideas,
Speaker 1: but I can't execute. Yeah, you know, I need him
Speaker 1: in order to execute on all those things.
Speaker 4: And the same thing, you know, like me, I don't
Speaker 4: think of all those different things in terms of like
Speaker 4: I mean, she's got amazing ideas, and I'm all right,
Speaker 4: let's okay, we can't do five of those things. We
Speaker 4: could do one, you know, like it, give me, give
Speaker 4: me some time, and we do that one and let's
Speaker 4: move on to the next one. But I need her
Speaker 4: for that because she has amazing ideas.
Speaker 2: That's good, that's good.
Speaker 3: Well, here's a part of the podcast where you grab
Speaker 3: that box. Y'all grabbed that box. Take the whole box
Speaker 3: as a marker and a key and a piece of paper.
Speaker 3: I want y'all individually to write a key to love.
Speaker 3: Write a key to love. Ask you what you think?
Speaker 3: What do you think about this episode? Well, and y'all
Speaker 3: can use the boxing, write and keep the box. Yeah,
Speaker 3: y'all can write on top of it.
Speaker 7: I loved it. You know, I did teach for America.
Speaker 7: I did teach for America.
Speaker 8: So of course the conversation is near and dear to
Speaker 8: my heart. It's not every day you meet like minded people.
Speaker 7: You know. My motto is when thinking about.
Speaker 8: Teaching or educating that if they don't learn the way
Speaker 8: we teach, we need to teach the way.
Speaker 7: That they learn.
Speaker 8: And a lot of people say that's doing too much,
Speaker 8: like here's my curriculum. They just need to kind of
Speaker 8: get on board. And you know, but when he talks
Speaker 8: about like differentiated instruction and how they meet the needs
Speaker 8: of their kids, it's like, I think that every kid
Speaker 8: deserves that level of like just support, right, and so
Speaker 8: meeting them where they are learning, taking the time to
Speaker 8: learn how they learn, to set them up for success,
Speaker 8: So hearing that, of course, and then just knowing that
Speaker 8: they're from the West Coast, which is the best coast,
Speaker 8: you know, the West Coast, and then just seeing how
Speaker 8: they went through all of these seasons together and then
Speaker 8: you know today now they have this thriving business and
Speaker 8: they are working out what it looks like to you know,
Speaker 8: work together it through different iterations of their you know
Speaker 8: marriage and then of their business marriage. So I just
Speaker 8: think it's really beautiful to see that evolution and how
Speaker 8: they take their strengths and perceived weaknesses and then you know,
Speaker 8: use them together to create something special.
Speaker 3: Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful. I'm not going to say nothing. I'll
Speaker 3: let you talk. What you said was just great. I
Speaker 3: said everything in the interview and you summed it up.
Speaker 7: I said that last week and you said, but you
Speaker 7: did you.
Speaker 2: Tell me I talk a lot during the interview.
Speaker 7: I talked a lot.
Speaker 2: No, not more than me.
Speaker 7: Okay, no more.
Speaker 3: Here's more so you you you summed it up perfectly
Speaker 3: and everything you said. And while they were talking about
Speaker 3: teaching the kid john Z teaching the sons how to
Speaker 3: read that too, I said, that's the Ashley thing.
Speaker 7: Yes it is. I told him I said, you have
Speaker 7: no idea. Like one of my.
Speaker 8: Pet peeves is people look at kids and they'll say, oh,
Speaker 8: he just he's too young to know any better. And
Speaker 8: I'm like, you don't know how smart kids are. Like
Speaker 8: that's what made me a successful kindergarten teachers. I used
Speaker 8: to talk to my kids like they were teenager, Like
Speaker 8: I don't baby them.
Speaker 7: I talked to them.
Speaker 8: I teach them, I have conversations with them, and then
Speaker 8: you realize how smart like kids really are. So that
Speaker 8: really was close to my heart because my kid will
Speaker 8: be doing that too.
Speaker 2: You're to tell them where you talk. I did, but
Speaker 2: the school. But what city?
Speaker 7: Oh, Bedsty, Brooklyn, New York.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she was out there in Bestue.
Speaker 7: She used to say, Bedsty do or die.
Speaker 1: Yes, I lived in Bedsty for a while when my
Speaker 1: mom was working at a newspaper there. And it's you know,
Speaker 1: there was when I was growing up. There was nothing
Speaker 1: like uncommon schools for kids you know out there, and
Speaker 1: it's just there's such a need. There's such a need,
Speaker 1: because I agree with you. When I was doing the
Speaker 1: preschool seeing kids, they're already set in their personalities by
Speaker 1: the age. People don't understand that when kids are toddlers,
Speaker 1: you know, there were born with our personalities and it
Speaker 1: develops over time. And just seeing kids, you know, click
Speaker 1: when something clicks with them, and how their capacity to
Speaker 1: learn and their passion to learn is like, people don't
Speaker 1: really understand that.
Speaker 4: And the other kids that we brought in, Johnson was
Speaker 4: teaching them too. I mean they came in not even
Speaker 4: knowing any of the letters, not knowing much of anything,
Speaker 4: and left us, you know, reading, you know, she was
Speaker 4: able to replicate it and and and people ask how
Speaker 4: and why. Honestly, what it is is high expectations. Yep,
Speaker 4: you know. Expectations are self fufilming prophecies. Right, So what'd
Speaker 4: you do with your little key there? Right here?
Speaker 2: She got?
Speaker 8: But real quick, before we move on, I just want
Speaker 8: to say, because I think there's a misconception or misunderstanding
Speaker 8: rather about charter schools.
Speaker 7: And I love what you said. There was nothing like that.
Speaker 8: And I know sometimes people say charter schools are trying
Speaker 8: to privatize education, and it gets real political. But I
Speaker 8: just think, and I'm not talking about every charter school,
Speaker 8: but I just want people to hear that there are
Speaker 8: a lot of good charter schools. That started with the
Speaker 8: tension of providing alternative options to failing schools in neighborhoods
Speaker 8: and communities that had been forgotten about and underserved, and
Speaker 8: no one was thinking about creating better options in a
Speaker 8: lot of our neighborhoods, and so not everybody gets it right.
Speaker 8: There are some bad charter schools, But I just want
Speaker 8: to celebrate those charter schools that are in those neighborhoods,
Speaker 8: serving our communities that have been forgotten about and who
Speaker 8: have the heart of what you said for our kids,
Speaker 8: because that's so important.
Speaker 2: So go ahead and read what's on those key to love.
Speaker 2: Thanks for sharing that.
Speaker 3: All right, you don't get me all passion should for
Speaker 3: charter school.
Speaker 1: She was talking. I was like, oh, she needs to
Speaker 1: go ahead and your education.
Speaker 7: It's near and dear to my heart, I have no
Speaker 7: free time.
Speaker 1: So I wrote the key. The key to a successful
Speaker 1: mayriorgriage is leading into each other's gifts.
Speaker 2: That's perfect.
Speaker 1: That's good because that's how our marriage is let.
Speaker 4: And I wrote, if you want to improve your marriage,
Speaker 4: improve yourself perfect.
Speaker 3: Well said, do you mind if c J c J
Speaker 3: makes a cameo he walking and walking here J hit
Speaker 3: camera four and walking here and wave after I can see.
Speaker 7: You with That's the whole time.
Speaker 4: You come on, buddy, come on, shy.
Speaker 1: Come on.
Speaker 7: A moment I said, I hope you didn't fall asleep.
Speaker 3: Look cool now yeah, your head off, listen, man, Thank
Speaker 3: y'all so much. Y'all did a fantastic job. How can
Speaker 3: people connect with y'all?
Speaker 4: So they can go to panic dot com spelled just
Speaker 4: like I said, Panda and commission. They can also go
Speaker 4: to our instagrams or Facebook. Actually I am I am
Speaker 4: Charles McGill on Facebook.
Speaker 1: And at missus john Cy across all platforms, across all
Speaker 1: platform Also check out our podcast because we're come sit
Speaker 1: entrepreneurship and hearty turn around about that Mike, he doesn't
Speaker 1: even understand. You don't know nothing about He wants to
Speaker 1: be a YouTuber.
Speaker 3: So yeah, so they've been so they drove here from
Speaker 3: Atlanta twelve hours yesterday's about twelve hours, right, twelve hours yesterday,
Speaker 3: and and they've been tugging it.
Speaker 2: They've been trying to see who can stay up the latest.
Speaker 1: I know they had a challenge.
Speaker 7: I don't.
Speaker 1: He woke me up at like four so and.
Speaker 7: Then he was sleepwalking right.
Speaker 2: Right up here. You don't realize you all on this camera.
Speaker 1: I wanted to also mention check out our podcast because
Speaker 1: you know, Charles is a great educator and one of
Speaker 1: the things that we wanted to do is educate more
Speaker 1: people about branding. So if you go to YouTube, it's
Speaker 1: brand Currency and you can just learn a little bit
Speaker 1: more about what a successful brand takes.
Speaker 3: Good good. It's also available on Apple podcasts and everywhere
Speaker 3: you listen to your audio path.
Speaker 2: Yes so good, good Malcolm.
Speaker 1: Malcolm, say hi to everybody.
Speaker 2: All right, go back, just go back to sleep. You good,
Speaker 2: it's your show.
Speaker 1: You never had any kids on with their parents.
Speaker 3: The first time my grand baby, my grand baby Claire,
Speaker 3: I mean well last week since we recorded this will
Speaker 3: probably airing about three weeks. But yeah, it was first
Speaker 3: time have my little brand baby and I had it
Speaker 3: was a daughter in season two or three or something.
Speaker 3: Thing came off a little bit and walked off as
Speaker 3: a single father and he married. Now, but I was like, hey,
Speaker 3: package deal, I think that was the named episode package
Speaker 3: Deal or something.
Speaker 2: But listen, thank y'all so much.
Speaker 3: Make sure y'all go out and go to a YouTube
Speaker 3: channel and support their podcast.
Speaker 2: Brand Currency.
Speaker 3: It's available everywhere you listen to your favorite podcast, So
Speaker 3: make sure that y'all subscribed to their channel and listen.
Speaker 3: I just want to just thank y'all for the work
Speaker 3: that y'all been doing. Building business is great, but building
Speaker 3: the family is even greater. And so ask and I
Speaker 3: salute you. I'm being intentional about this word family and
Speaker 3: the importance of family, and so salute to y'all. So
Speaker 3: may the love you shared today outlived the sea year in,
Speaker 3: may carry.
Speaker 7: You through the days when words are.
Speaker 2: Few and faith has to do the talking. Y'all give
Speaker 2: it up for the mcgills, y'all. You do, so, thank y'all.
Speaker 3: Ladarian rusted suddenly into child protective services in twenty fifteen.
Speaker 2: My nephew, black a boy.
Speaker 3: The likelihood have been adopted outside of kinship, slim to none. Rmione,
Speaker 3: sixteen years old, black a boy with five years in
Speaker 3: the false care system before I even knew his name.
Speaker 3: The likelihood have ever been adopted?
Speaker 2: Yep, you guessed it. Slim to none.
Speaker 3: While Ladarian and OURMIONI were trying to survive and barely
Speaker 3: thrive in an overpopulated and underfunded false care system, I
Speaker 3: was living my own life, doing well professionally, having been
Speaker 3: a single father with a daughter who at that point
Speaker 3: was doing well in college. It was my time to
Speaker 3: live my life right.
Speaker 5: Wrong.
Speaker 3: I felt unsettled, tireless, agitated. There are just two many
Speaker 3: of our black children stuck in ambiguity and in the
Speaker 3: limbo of the Falter care system. In twenty seventeen, I
Speaker 3: legally adopted my nephew Ladarian. Fast forward to twenty nineteen.
Speaker 3: I had no ties to this other young king, but
Speaker 3: I felt God instructed me to adopt them also, and
Speaker 3: I o bate. Starting over with parenting should have been enough. Right,
Speaker 3: Working with various foster care and adoption agencies to help
Speaker 3: bring awareness to the countless young Black kings and the
Speaker 3: Falster care system should have decreased my agitation.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: Joining the board of directors of Advantage of Adoption and
Speaker 3: organization that helps find permanent adoptive homes for children in
Speaker 3: false care should have led to some type of resolve.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: No, not at all. None of it felt like I
Speaker 3: had done enough. I now realized that every one of
Speaker 3: those experiences was land the fundamental foundation for my life's mission.
Speaker 2: Kingdom Royal, Kingdom.
Speaker 3: Royal would be a lucky to re state of the
Speaker 3: art home for foster boys. Our first location will be
Speaker 3: in the Dallas Fortward Metroplex. We will utilize the whole
Speaker 3: person approach that instills identity, empowers them to advocate for themselves,
Speaker 3: and enlightens them regarding new perspectives and limitless options that
Speaker 3: they thought were impossible. Though the young Kings will attend
Speaker 3: the local public schools that are in proximity the King
Speaker 3: of Royale, our at home curriculum will broaden their worldview
Speaker 3: through participating in the arts, attending various cultural events, learning
Speaker 3: about and engaging in multifaceted discussions about current events and
Speaker 3: even relevant historical contexts, introducing them to gardening and landscaping,
Speaker 3: and even caring for our animals on our form and
Speaker 3: on site stables. We just launched our startup capital campaign
Speaker 3: with the goal of raising two point eight million dollars.
Speaker 3: Now why two point eight million dollars?
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 3: In twenty seventeen, I created a web series in which
Speaker 3: I performed random acts of kindness for targeting the homeless community.
Speaker 3: One of the most notable successes was that one of
Speaker 3: the videos went viral, garnering twenty eight million views.
Speaker 2: However, one of.
Speaker 3: My biggest regrets is that I didn't raise a single
Speaker 3: dollar to help in implementing a more sustainable plan for
Speaker 3: the homeless community. So throughout the years, with much remorse,
Speaker 3: I reflect that I'm not maximizing that moment. I knew
Speaker 3: if at that time just ten percent of the viewers
Speaker 3: donated one dollar, we would have raised at least two
Speaker 3: point eight million dollars that could have really established long
Speaker 3: term support for the homeless community, or at least started
Speaker 3: a long term initiative to do so. This is my
Speaker 3: do over, this is our new beginning. Together, we can
Speaker 3: attack this at the route by specifically helping our homeless
Speaker 3: Black boys who are already disproportionately represented in the American
Speaker 3: fossil care system. I'm the Terra Sarwickfield. I've been nominated
Speaker 3: for three regional Emmys documenting my work with the homeless
Speaker 3: as well as my personal adoption journey. Despite those accolades,
Speaker 3: the greatest award for me is truly providing the infrastructure
Speaker 3: for a transformed life. Visit Kingdomroyal dot com for more details,
Speaker 3: Crown a king and make a donation today. I hope
Speaker 3: you enjoyed this episode of the Dear Future WIFEI Podcast.
Speaker 3: Remember be lit, live intentionally and transparently, and don't stop loving.
Speaker 3: Make sure to subscribe to our Dear Future Wife you
Speaker 3: YouTube channels. We're available on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify,
Speaker 3: and Stitcher.
Speaker 2: You welcome your support. Simply share our podcasts with your
Speaker 2: friends and family.