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Speaker 1: We all come with something. I'm just not ashamed of

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Speaker 1: the somethings that I come with.

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Speaker 2: I'm just going to start here and say trigger warning.

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Speaker 2: We're going to go back to how you came into

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Speaker 2: this world.

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Speaker 1: My mother was at eleven years old, had me at

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Speaker 1: the age of twelve. She was driven from Saint Augustine, Florida,

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Speaker 1: down to Boynton Beach, Florida to have an abortion, and

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Speaker 1: she refused to do it. Months later I was born.

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Speaker 1: I really had a bad relationship with my mom as

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Speaker 1: a kid until I found out how I was conceived.

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Speaker 1: The minute that my mom revealed that to me, all

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Speaker 1: the hate that I had towards my mom instantly turned

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Speaker 1: into love because I realized that my mom was a

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Speaker 1: kid raising kids. At twelve years old, I was getting

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Speaker 1: ready to get kicked off of the boys ranch because

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Speaker 1: I kept fighting. I signed a contract that I would

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Speaker 1: never get into another fight. Thirty minutes after I signed

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Speaker 1: that contract, I got into a fight. I tell people

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Speaker 1: all the time. Now I realized that that was actually

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Speaker 1: my first WWE contract.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to diffat Wife podcast from King's Court dadd Is Bullder.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Diffie. You watch the podcast King what's

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Speaker 2: up man? I asked you, how was your dating life

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Speaker 2: in college and growing up? He said, well, I wasn't

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Speaker 2: the most attractive growing up or whatever.

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Speaker 1: I'm handsome as hell now. Women calling me fine is

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Speaker 1: nothing to me. But if a woman calls me gorgeous

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Speaker 1: or handsome, gotcha?

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Speaker 3: Got me?

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Speaker 1: And Will Packer asked me to do the show several times.

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Speaker 1: I told him no, I don't do ratchet TV, and

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Speaker 1: he said, well, I'm not a ratchet producer.

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Speaker 3: There it is for me.

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Speaker 1: I want to be loved by a black woman that understands,

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Speaker 1: even if it's their second time around, what marriage really is.

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Speaker 1: I've achieved way more than anybody would have ever expected.

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Speaker 1: But the proudest thing that I've been able to navigate

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Speaker 1: is fatherhood. I help thousands of kids every year. I

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Speaker 1: run the largest back to school bash in the entire world.

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Speaker 1: I've heard at a football Stavent thirty thousand backpacks with

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Speaker 1: school supplies. Nobody built the last name Bullard for me.

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Speaker 1: I have a chance to build my last name to mean.

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Speaker 3: Something as a black man. Why is marriage important to you?

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Speaker 2: The Future Wife podcast has global impact From Texas.

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Speaker 4: I have been on this journey of healing and self discovery,

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Speaker 4: and this podcast has been a vital part of my process.

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Speaker 2: God's establishing through you a legacy, a display of freedom,

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Speaker 2: founding authentic spirituality, California. I learned so much as a

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Speaker 2: single man through your podcast and continue to learn so

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Speaker 2: much as now a married man Nigeria.

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Speaker 3: This is just therapy for me.

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Speaker 2: You know, I've been healed, I've been strengthen in my

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Speaker 2: convictions on the still have to do single hoopbita Amsterdam

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Speaker 2: way that you've shown us how it is possible for

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Speaker 2: a man to be as intentional as you are New Jersey.

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Speaker 3: I appreciate your vulnerability.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate just being able to see that there is

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Speaker 2: life after divorce to New York.

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Speaker 4: I am a single woman, so these episodes really give

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Speaker 4: me hope and courage that God does have a husband

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Speaker 4: for me discover.

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Speaker 3: And recover love.

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Speaker 2: I'm Laterra Saar Whitfield and this is season ten of

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Speaker 2: the Dear Future Wifie Podcasts. Welcome to a Dear Future

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Speaker 2: Wifie podcast. I'm your host, Laterra Sar Wifield. Listen, are

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Speaker 2: you still shacking up with us? If you're still shacking

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Speaker 2: up with us, can we get a commitment, hit that

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Speaker 2: subscription button and subscribe. Make sure you turn on your

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Speaker 2: notification bell. She'll be notified about upcoming episodes. And hey,

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Speaker 2: while you're at it, head over the Patreon. That's where

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Speaker 2: you get a chance to see BTS footage. You get

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Speaker 2: to see me traveling, you get to see little hints

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Speaker 2: that I drop about the mystery Bride. So if you

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Speaker 2: want to follow that journey, make sure you head over

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Speaker 2: to Patreon. And hey, let me go ahead and just

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Speaker 2: shout out the patrons that have joined thus far. Y'all

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Speaker 2: have been finding so much value in the content, so

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Speaker 2: thank you so much for rocking with us. Make sure

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Speaker 2: you click the link of description sign up for the

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Speaker 2: melon list. Listen, man, this king that I have on

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Speaker 2: the podcast or that you know I always call a

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Speaker 2: lot of men kings when they sit on the yellow couch.

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Speaker 2: But he's actually on the show show where he's called

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Speaker 2: a king for real. So, without further ado, welcome to

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Speaker 2: Dear Future Wife Podcast. My homie from King's Court, Thaddeus Buller,

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Speaker 2: Welcome to the Dear Future Wife Podcast.

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Speaker 3: King.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what's up. So let me tell you something.

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Speaker 2: One thing I said to you right when you came

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Speaker 2: in the studio. Was how much I valued how you

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Speaker 2: showed up on this dating show because a lot of times,

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Speaker 2: a lot of dating shows, they become very salacious. But

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Speaker 2: you've always I mean, on this show, you've been really

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Speaker 2: grounded and you showed up with impeccable emotional awareness. And

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Speaker 2: let me ask you this, Have you always been like that?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I mean, I guess the most rewarding part about this

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Speaker 1: process and this journey on being on King's Court is

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Speaker 1: that the folks that really know me are looking at

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Speaker 1: the show and they're like, oh, yeah, that's him. And

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Speaker 1: there's obviously been some growth points for me throughout my life,

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Speaker 1: and I I understand where I am now versus where

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Speaker 1: I was probably three years ago and five years prior

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Speaker 1: to that. And it has been a process. And I

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Speaker 1: would tell any man or woman that you know, for me,

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Speaker 1: what you're seeing now is just a person that's a

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Speaker 1: recipient of great therapy, counseling, great introspective thoughts of who

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Speaker 1: I am, and kind of a rebirth of who I am.

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Speaker 1: I've always felt like I'm that dude, you know, And

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Speaker 1: if you look at my resume and my track record

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Speaker 1: of what has been been accomplished through me.

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Speaker 3: I sometimes I.

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Speaker 1: Look at the things that I've been able to accomplish,

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Speaker 1: and it's not what I've accomplished, is what God has

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Speaker 1: allowed me to do. And you know, when you look

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Speaker 1: at where I've where I came from, how my life started,

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Speaker 1: you know, as to a twelve year old mother and

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Speaker 1: being labeled a kid that would be dead or in

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Speaker 1: jail by the time I was sixteen, and kind of

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Speaker 1: headed that direction. You know, I truly understand that when

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Speaker 1: I got an opportunity to go to the Florida SHARE's

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Speaker 1: Boys Wrench at twelve years old, and I was told that,

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Speaker 1: you know, by Patrick Minogue, a white guy from Chicago, Illinois.

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Speaker 1: I was getting ready to get kicked off of the

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Speaker 1: Boy's wrench and because I kept fighting, and I signed

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Speaker 1: a contract that I would never get into another fight

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Speaker 1: otherwise I would be sent back home to Boynton Beach.

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Speaker 1: And thirty minutes after I signed that contract, I got

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Speaker 1: into a fight, which I tell people all the time

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Speaker 1: now I realized that that was actually my first WWE contract.

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Speaker 1: But you know, he he took a chance on me.

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Speaker 1: Like it was fifteen people in the room and he

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Speaker 1: was the president of the Boys Ranch at that time,

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Speaker 1: and he could have made a decision to go with

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Speaker 1: what all fifteen people had agreed to do, and you know,

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Speaker 1: he took a chance and said, you know, I love

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Speaker 1: you and I believe in you, and that there's no

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Speaker 1: such thing as a bad kid. And at that time

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Speaker 1: I asked him, I was like, how can you say that.

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Speaker 1: I've been told I'll be deader in jail by the

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Speaker 1: time I'm sixteen. You know, I'll never graduate from high school,

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Speaker 1: which in my family, nobody had ever graduated from high school.

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Speaker 1: Nobody went to college. You know, you got to consider

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Speaker 1: the fact that my mom never even walked across the

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Speaker 1: high school graduation stage until after I walked across the

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Speaker 1: high school graduation stage.

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Speaker 3: Good.

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Speaker 1: And so for me showing up on this show like

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Speaker 1: I promised, Will Packer, I mean Will Packer asked me

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Speaker 1: to do the show several times and I told him, no,

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Speaker 1: I don't do ratchet TV. And he said, well, I'm

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Speaker 1: not a ratchet producer. There it is, and he said, look,

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Speaker 1: there's no pressure. I'm going to have someone reach out

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Speaker 1: to you kind of show you some episodes of Queen's

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Speaker 1: Court and so that you can kind of get a

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Speaker 1: feel of what the show is about. And he's like,

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Speaker 1: you know, I wouldn't put you in a position to

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Speaker 1: dishonor anything that you stand for, he said, And when

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Speaker 1: you get on this show, I want you to be

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Speaker 1: Thattius good because if you are that, if you are yourself,

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Speaker 1: whether you find someone on this journey or not, people

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Speaker 1: are going to love you. And that's what I want

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Speaker 1: out of this process for you. Yes, I want to

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Speaker 1: make a great TV show.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: And I didn't even know who the other two Kings

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Speaker 1: were at the time either, but I said, that's easy

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Speaker 1: for me, you know what I mean. I can get

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Speaker 1: on that you know, TV show and be myself. I

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Speaker 1: mean I've been doing that essentially for seventeen years now

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Speaker 1: with WWE.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, and.

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Speaker 1: So what people are seeing now is Statius not Titus O'Neil,

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Speaker 1: even though they're both one and the same. I recognize

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Speaker 1: that when I go out. You know, you'd ask me

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Speaker 1: prior to that. You know, how do people refer you

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Speaker 1: to as? And it's like they call you tight? It

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Speaker 1: is that that is the majority of people call me tight.

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Speaker 1: It is because they know me from wrestling. But now

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Speaker 1: more people are starting to see that is and that's

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Speaker 1: really essentially who I want people to see anyway, a

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Speaker 1: man that you know it is not. I'm not ashamed

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Speaker 1: of anything that I had to go through.

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Speaker 3: I'm not.

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Speaker 1: A shame that I was married once and got divorced.

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Speaker 1: I'm not ashamed to talk about, like the depression that

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Speaker 1: I went through during that time, how I felt. I'm

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Speaker 1: not ashamed to talk about the trauma that I dealt

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Speaker 1: with as a kid. And so because I do believe

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Speaker 1: that our tests are our testimonies, and our messages are

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Speaker 1: end up being our messages, well, hold on.

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you something, because you just gave the

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Speaker 2: whole framework about what this whole interview is going to

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Speaker 2: be about. So this is great, and I'm glad you touched.

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Speaker 2: You did a great overview. So we're gonna go back

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Speaker 2: to how you came into this world because you talked

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Speaker 2: about being a son to a twelve year old mother.

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Speaker 2: And I'm just gonna start here and say trigger warning

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Speaker 2: because even when you talked about this on King's Court,

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Speaker 2: it left one of the contestants or daters or whatever

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Speaker 2: in tears, and so trigger warning for that, and openly

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Speaker 2: share how are you born?

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Speaker 3: How are you conceived? I was conceived l rape.

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Speaker 1: My mother was raped at eleven years old, had me

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Speaker 1: at the age of twelve, against the wishes of many people.

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Speaker 1: She was driven from Saint Augustine, Florida, down to Boynton Beach,

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Speaker 1: Florida to have an abortion and she refused to do it,

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Speaker 1: and months later I was born and life was extremely hard.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I've said this numerous times. I really

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Speaker 1: had a bad relationship with my mom as a kid

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Speaker 1: until I, you know, found out how I was conceived.

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Speaker 1: At seventeen years old. She had come up and my

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Speaker 1: grandmother had just passed away from breast cancer in nineteen

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Speaker 1: ninety five. I was doing really well in school, was

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Speaker 1: number one recruit in high school. Yeah, and so I

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Speaker 1: think my mom was dealing with her grief of my

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Speaker 1: mom and maybe the issues that they may have had too.

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Speaker 1: But I think she felt like it was time for

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Speaker 1: me to know, and so she came up to live Oak.

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Speaker 1: I thought I was in trouble, and she told me

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Speaker 1: how I was conceived. And I asked her if she

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Speaker 1: knew who did it, and she said yes. And she

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Speaker 1: asked me if I wanted to meet him, and I

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Speaker 1: said no, I'd probably kill him. Yeah, exactly. But you know,

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Speaker 1: the minute that my mom revealed that to me, like

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Speaker 1: all the hate that I had towards my mom instantly

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Speaker 1: turned into love because I realized that my mom was

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Speaker 1: a kid raising kids. And I think that there are

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Speaker 1: a lot of women that have had to experience what

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Speaker 1: my mom had to EXPERI many of them. You know,

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Speaker 1: my mom is twelve years older than me now, and

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Speaker 1: I believe in my heart of hearts that my mom

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Speaker 1: is not only my first hero, but I really think

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Speaker 1: that my mom is a is a vessel for what

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Speaker 1: God can do. Absolutely and even with her being a vessel,

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Speaker 1: and even with me being a vessel and saving and

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Speaker 1: helping so many people, raising millions of dollars for so

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Speaker 1: many different organizations, like I still consider myself the least

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Speaker 1: of them. And it goes back to how, you know,

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Speaker 1: how I'm showing up on this show like I've achieved

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Speaker 1: way more than I would have anybody would have ever

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Speaker 1: expected for me to achieve. And I've attained so much.

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Speaker 1: But the proudest thing that I've been able to navigate

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Speaker 1: is fatherhood, you know, to my three children. And I

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Speaker 1: had the opportunity, despite going through a divorce of being

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Speaker 1: something that I never had, and being something that my

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Speaker 1: mom could be extremely proud of, not just as a

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Speaker 1: student athlete, not just as a productive philanthropist, but most

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Speaker 1: importantly giving her grandchildren that she can be proud of.

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Speaker 1: And you know, for me, especially at this stage of

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Speaker 1: my life, like nobody built the last name Bullard for me,

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Speaker 1: but I have a chance to and had a chance

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Speaker 1: to build my last name to mean something. And I

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Speaker 1: think the greatest gift that a man can give to

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Speaker 1: his family is not the house that they live in,

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Speaker 1: or the cars that they drive, or the clothes that

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Speaker 1: they wear, but it's to have a great last name.

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Speaker 1: And because that opens up doors for our children, our grandchildren,

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Speaker 1: It puts smiles on people's faces when they were oh

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Speaker 1: you're a fatty Sais sign, Oh yeah, come on in.

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Speaker 3: You know, and.

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Speaker 1: My mom, my mom could be so much greater by

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Speaker 1: sharing her story, but I recognize the fact that she's

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Speaker 1: not ready to do that. So even as I've evolved

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Speaker 1: as a man at forty eight years old and accomplished

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Speaker 1: like being real about who I am and where I

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Speaker 1: came from and what I deal with is honestly league,

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Speaker 1: it unlocks a lot for a lot of people that

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Speaker 1: I never even will meet. And if I had to

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Speaker 1: encourage anybody about like authenticity and showing up as your

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Speaker 1: real self, it's the greatest gift that you can have,

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Speaker 1: it's freedom. And at this stage in my life, like

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Speaker 1: you know, I there was the time that I'd never

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Speaker 1: thought I would want to be a husband again, and

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Speaker 1: I realized that that was the enemy and the devil

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Speaker 1: trying to take away something that was for future, not

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Speaker 1: what I have. I want to be a husband. I

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Speaker 1: want to be a really really good husband to my wife,

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Speaker 1: and I know that she's out there, and this journey

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Speaker 1: for me was an opportunity to show people like, hey,

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Speaker 1: I can be a lot. I'm going to be a lot.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to test you, I'm going to make you happy,

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Speaker 1: I'm going to make you mad as hell. But I

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Speaker 1: know that I'm a man of God. I know that

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Speaker 1: I'm a man of substance, and I know that I'm

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Speaker 1: called for a much greater purpose than what they currently

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Speaker 1: see at the moment. And that's why I understand that

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Speaker 1: whoever my wife is going to be, I have to

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Speaker 1: provide grace and forgiveness for her long before I even

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Speaker 1: meet her. That part I have to make that decision

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Speaker 1: that I'm going to forgive my wife for anything that

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Speaker 1: she may do to hurt me, because Jesus died so

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Speaker 1: that we can all live this life of freedom. Absolutely,

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Speaker 1: and we all come with something, and I'm just not

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Speaker 1: ashamed of the somethings that I come with. And I

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Speaker 1: let you know right away, I want to go back.

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Speaker 2: I want to go back because it may be some

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Speaker 2: men struggling with We always about women going through having

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Speaker 2: quote unquote daddy issues, but very rarely do we talk

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Speaker 2: about mama trauma and what that looks like and how

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Speaker 2: that shows up.

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Speaker 3: What were you dealing with?

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Speaker 2: You said you had a lot of anger towards your

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Speaker 2: mom all up until the age of seventeen. What were

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Speaker 2: you dealing with? It sounded like you weren't. Were you

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Speaker 2: raised with your mom? You're raised with your aunt. I

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Speaker 2: was raised with my mom majority up until twelve years old.

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Speaker 2: And then you moved to where to life Oak, Florida. Okay,

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Speaker 2: so it was it was a camp, yeah, boys rancho

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Speaker 2: and was that boy's ranch for kids that were at risk?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Kids that were yeah, not they were on the

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Speaker 3: path to.

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Speaker 2: You're going to prison of diner yeah, and so what

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Speaker 2: were you going through and that moment towards your mom

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Speaker 2: that made you carry such anger and resentment.

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Speaker 1: Well, one, we were poor, so I never had the

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Speaker 1: best of anything. Really, in my eyes, it wasn't the

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Speaker 1: best of anything. And I, you know, as I got older,

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Speaker 1: I recognized the fact that the best thing that I

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Speaker 1: did have that you can't put a price tag on,

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Speaker 1: is the love of a mother.

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Speaker 3: So you felt love back then.

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Speaker 1: At times, but I also felt like I couldn't be

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Speaker 1: like I would ask questions and the answer would be

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Speaker 1: because I said.

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Speaker 3: So yes, which is what we were always told back then. Yes, the.

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Speaker 1: My mom worked a lot, you know, waiting tables, cleaning,

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Speaker 1: doing whatever she could to make ends meet that never met.

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Speaker 1: We lived in the projects. I'm surrounded by drug dealer, thugs, everything,

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Speaker 1: and then even going to some of my relative's house

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Speaker 1: because my mom didn't have money to put us in

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Speaker 1: daycare or you know, it was some places that I

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Speaker 1: didn't want to go, and I would voice that I

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Speaker 1: don't want to go here. Well, I don't care what

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Speaker 1: you want, you need to go, You're going here, And

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Speaker 1: to me, it was very dismissive of the fact that

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Speaker 1: you don't even know why I don't want to go here,

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Speaker 1: So I can't even open up to you why I

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Speaker 1: don't want to go here. I can't tell you that

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Speaker 1: there's abuse going on. There's drug, you know, use going on,

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Speaker 1: there's drinking, there's alcohol, and there's things that I just

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Speaker 1: don't want to be around. And there was a lot

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Speaker 1: of resentment towards my mom because I've never felt heard,

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Speaker 1: always felt do as I'm telling you to do, regardless

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Speaker 1: of what's going on. And I think that's probably why

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Speaker 1: I have such a huge heart for kids and doing

348
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:53,080
Speaker 1: the right thing for children is because you know, you

349
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Speaker 1: hear all the time that like kids are bad, and

350
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Speaker 1: these kids are lazy, and these kids don't want to

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Speaker 1: do X, Y and Z and this and that. Actually

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Speaker 1: they do, they want to do a lot. And I

353
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Speaker 1: was that kid that was told you don't you're lazy

354
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Speaker 1: because I found it easier out to do something than you.

355
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Speaker 1: Like we went to school, we had to we had

356
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Speaker 1: to look up things and thesaurus or encyclopedia. They got Google.

357
00:20:17,960 --> 00:20:19,720
Speaker 1: Now they can get on their phone and get this

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Speaker 1: information like that. That doesn't make them lazy, That means

359
00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:26,679
Speaker 1: makes them advanced. You know, it's a lot of older people,

360
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:29,680
Speaker 1: including myself, like, hey man, show me how to work

361
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Speaker 1: this this phone, Like I now need to do this update,

362
00:20:33,240 --> 00:20:38,920
Speaker 1: you know. And so I think a lot of black men,

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Speaker 1: especially that grow up with single mothers, like there's this

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Speaker 1: great amount of joy and pride to be able to

365
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Speaker 1: make your mama proud, but there's also this huge responsibility

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Speaker 1: because some cases those mothers become entitled like that, well,

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Speaker 1: since you're doing this, now, you need to do this

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Speaker 1: for me, And that to me was a source of

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Speaker 1: resentment as an adult, like you're my parent. Like I

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Speaker 1: told my kids, I asked them one day they were,

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Speaker 1: you know, twelve and probably fourteen, my two sons. I said,

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Speaker 1: what do you guys want to be when you grow up?

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Speaker 1: What do you want to do. It's like, oh, well,

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Speaker 1: you know, I want to go to play for football,

375
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Speaker 1: I want to go to college. I want to do

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Speaker 1: all these things, YadA, YadA YadA, and then I want

377
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Speaker 1: to make a lot of money. I want to buy you.

378
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Speaker 1: Titus was like, I want to My youngest son's name

379
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Speaker 1: is Titus. He's like, I want to buy you a house,

380
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Speaker 1: and I want to buy mom a house. And I

381
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:42,080
Speaker 1: was like, first of all, let me tell you and

382
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Speaker 1: TJ something. Don't buy me and your mom nothing until

383
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Speaker 1: you're settled for yourself. Our job as your parent, as

384
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Speaker 1: your parents is to put you in the best place

385
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Speaker 1: possible to be successful. The sacrifices we make is to

386
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Speaker 1: give you the best life and the best opportunity possible.

387
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Speaker 1: But I don't want to own a house that something

388
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Speaker 1: goes wrong and you get injured or whatever, and now

389
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Speaker 1: you moving back in with me.

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Speaker 3: He said, to feed the purpose.

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Speaker 1: I'd rather you own the house, you set a place

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Speaker 1: for yourself, and then whatever men your mom, whether we're

393
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Speaker 1: together or not together, or whatever you choose to do

394
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:36,600
Speaker 1: for us, that's after you've set your table. And I

395
00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:40,159
Speaker 1: think in the black community so often, I'm gonna buy

396
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Speaker 1: my mama house, I'm gonna buy my mama car, and

397
00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:44,720
Speaker 1: this and that, and then something life could happens and

398
00:22:44,760 --> 00:22:47,240
Speaker 1: things go wrong, and all of a sudden you're in

399
00:22:47,320 --> 00:22:49,720
Speaker 1: that same predicament you were in as a kid, where

400
00:22:49,720 --> 00:22:54,160
Speaker 1: you're living with your mother or your father or your parents.

401
00:22:55,680 --> 00:22:59,280
Speaker 1: That's not life to me, that's not the life I

402
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,680
Speaker 1: want to live. The pressure that I want my kids

403
00:23:01,720 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 1: to live with. I want my kids all of them

404
00:23:06,040 --> 00:23:11,240
Speaker 1: to have their own space so that if they want

405
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:13,199
Speaker 1: to punch the wall, they got to pay for it.

406
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,320
Speaker 1: I want my kids to have their own space where

407
00:23:16,320 --> 00:23:19,440
Speaker 1: they can raise their family, they can have whatever friend

408
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Speaker 1: they want to have over, and they don't have to

409
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:23,960
Speaker 1: look over their shoulder and wonder if dad is or

410
00:23:24,040 --> 00:23:27,720
Speaker 1: mom is going to get upset about whatever in their house. Hey,

411
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Speaker 1: if you want your house to be filthy, that's all

412
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:32,320
Speaker 1: your house I want to live. Yeah, let me ask

413
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Speaker 1: you this.

414
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Speaker 3: When you were seventeen, after you got to a place

415
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:38,760
Speaker 3: of forgiving your mom and understanding what she had.

416
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,399
Speaker 2: The plight of her life, did you give yourself that

417
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:42,240
Speaker 2: ideology I'm.

418
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Speaker 3: Gonna buy my mom my house.

419
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Speaker 2: We grew up poor, and I'm gonna make sure that

420
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Speaker 2: the life that wasn't afforded to me that I'm gonna

421
00:23:47,600 --> 00:23:50,640
Speaker 2: make sure that my mom is introduced to a better lifestyle.

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00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:56,200
Speaker 1: No, I didn't, And I'll tell you why. I tell

423
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Speaker 1: you why because you asked me about like having you know,

424
00:24:03,920 --> 00:24:07,520
Speaker 1: different traumas throughout mind. So when I had to go

425
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,120
Speaker 1: to the boys ranch, I felt like my mom gave

426
00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 1: up on me, which was another trauma. Yep, yep. Abandonment

427
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:15,640
Speaker 1: I felt. Yeah, so I felt like my mom had

428
00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:19,520
Speaker 1: just given up on me, and that was a source

429
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,600
Speaker 1: of kind of my anger at the time. So when

430
00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:24,520
Speaker 1: I tell you that seventeen, like, I'm doing well and

431
00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:28,760
Speaker 1: I'm understanding that, like my mom was a kid trying

432
00:24:28,800 --> 00:24:33,159
Speaker 1: to raise kids at seventeen, I'm still a kid, yeah,

433
00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:36,919
Speaker 1: trying to figure out life. But I got empowered and

434
00:24:37,000 --> 00:24:41,640
Speaker 1: motivated and inspired knowing that, like, Okay, this is part

435
00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:45,680
Speaker 1: of my story, but it isn't part of my ending.

436
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:49,720
Speaker 1: And my mom never had anything to do with what

437
00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:51,120
Speaker 1: I saw my ending being.

438
00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:53,520
Speaker 3: So did she come visit you at the Boys Ranch?

439
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:56,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it was kind of controlled, just because while

440
00:24:56,560 --> 00:25:00,160
Speaker 1: they're working on me there, they're working on her. He's

441
00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:03,280
Speaker 1: getting services and I have three younger brothers and so

442
00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:09,520
Speaker 1: you know, she's raising them as a single mother. The context,

443
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:12,000
Speaker 1: how long were you there? I was supposed to be

444
00:25:12,000 --> 00:25:14,439
Speaker 1: there for eighteen months. I ended up staying for five years.

445
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:17,120
Speaker 1: Five years? Yeah, could you kept getting in trouble? No,

446
00:25:17,440 --> 00:25:22,159
Speaker 1: Actually it's the opposite. It was the first eleven months,

447
00:25:22,840 --> 00:25:25,560
Speaker 1: or actually the first six months I was about to

448
00:25:25,560 --> 00:25:30,199
Speaker 1: get kicked off, and you know that conversation that I

449
00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:33,520
Speaker 1: had with Patrick Minogue. It really kind of like I've

450
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:36,119
Speaker 1: always been a very rebellious person. I still am to

451
00:25:36,119 --> 00:25:38,359
Speaker 1: this day. Don't tell me what can't be done. Don't

452
00:25:38,400 --> 00:25:42,119
Speaker 1: tell me that I can't do something, because for years

453
00:25:42,160 --> 00:25:44,119
Speaker 1: I was told I can't do, I won't do, I

454
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:47,640
Speaker 1: will never do. And I just realized that like that

455
00:25:47,680 --> 00:25:50,920
Speaker 1: at those times, that they never saw what God could

456
00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:54,080
Speaker 1: do through me. And did you believe in God back then?

457
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:58,600
Speaker 1: I always believe in God, And even now, you know

458
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:03,280
Speaker 1: my don't call myself a Christian. I'm a man of faith.

459
00:26:04,200 --> 00:26:07,840
Speaker 1: I think the Christians, the Catholics, the Muslims, Buddhists, I

460
00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:12,200
Speaker 1: think all of them have their extremists. And I think

461
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:18,640
Speaker 1: that for me, Jesus Christ died for everybody. I serve him.

462
00:26:18,960 --> 00:26:20,360
Speaker 3: But you're referring to Jesus Christ.

463
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:24,120
Speaker 1: Though, Yes, But I won't label myself into a religious

464
00:26:24,119 --> 00:26:26,520
Speaker 1: institution because as soon as I do that, it's much

465
00:26:26,560 --> 00:26:29,040
Speaker 1: like politics. As soon as you name yourself a Republican

466
00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 1: or a Democrat, then you start ostracizing other people. From

467
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:37,399
Speaker 1: you ostracize other people, and other people look at you like, oh,

468
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:40,119
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like if Jesus died for everybody,

469
00:26:41,040 --> 00:26:43,520
Speaker 1: Like why he and I know that he's using me

470
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 1: for everybody. Then why do I need to go by

471
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,120
Speaker 1: the label that? Why do I need to label myself

472
00:26:50,720 --> 00:26:53,280
Speaker 1: I'm not I'm not I'm not I'm not apologetic by

473
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,840
Speaker 1: the fact. Yes, I follow Jesus Christ. I go to church.

474
00:26:56,160 --> 00:26:58,639
Speaker 1: I go to a non denominational church. Now, so when

475
00:26:58,680 --> 00:27:02,879
Speaker 1: you ask me about my faith walk as a kid,

476
00:27:03,200 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 1: we were in church for hours at a time. But

477
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:09,399
Speaker 1: I also see these same people that were pastors, you know,

478
00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:15,440
Speaker 1: deacons and folks that were at the church all the time, drinking, smoking, cussing,

479
00:27:15,600 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 1: fussing five minutes after we got out of church. That

480
00:27:19,600 --> 00:27:22,439
Speaker 1: doesn't make those people bad people. It just made me

481
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:27,280
Speaker 1: look at like, Okay, is this all a show? Like

482
00:27:29,320 --> 00:27:33,560
Speaker 1: a homeless guy at thirteen years old is what led

483
00:27:33,600 --> 00:27:34,760
Speaker 1: me closer to Christ.

484
00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:35,800
Speaker 3: What happened?

485
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:39,480
Speaker 1: So, I'm in high school at Live Oak, I'm in

486
00:27:40,800 --> 00:27:43,560
Speaker 1: ninth grade, and we used to have a homeless guy

487
00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:44,840
Speaker 1: come to practice all the time.

488
00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:48,720
Speaker 3: He loved football and.

489
00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:53,800
Speaker 1: One of our booster club president used to get pastries

490
00:27:53,840 --> 00:27:58,439
Speaker 1: from publics before they threw him out every Thursday, and

491
00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 1: so he'd come with a truckload of pay streets every

492
00:28:00,680 --> 00:28:03,359
Speaker 1: every every Thursday. That was our walkthrough day because we

493
00:28:03,480 --> 00:28:06,880
Speaker 1: played on Fridays and we'd all just grab stuff, grab stuff,

494
00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 1: grab stuff. Well, I would always on the way by

495
00:28:09,440 --> 00:28:11,720
Speaker 1: give him stuff. And I found out that me and

496
00:28:11,840 --> 00:28:16,159
Speaker 1: him both loved the blueberry scrusl cake, and so he

497
00:28:16,240 --> 00:28:17,960
Speaker 1: stopped me one day and he said, hey, do you

498
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,720
Speaker 1: mind if I, you know, talk to you for a second.

499
00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:24,560
Speaker 1: And I said yes, sir, So I sat there and

500
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,760
Speaker 1: he said, you know, God is gonna God is going

501
00:28:26,800 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 1: to use you to do some mighty things. Really, And

502
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:31,919
Speaker 1: I said, man, yeah, man, I can't wait, you know,

503
00:28:32,119 --> 00:28:35,680
Speaker 1: I'm I can't wait to you know, go to college

504
00:28:35,720 --> 00:28:37,240
Speaker 1: so I can go to the NFL and make a

505
00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:38,640
Speaker 1: lot of money, so I can help a lot of

506
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:41,640
Speaker 1: people and you know, do all these amazing things for people.

507
00:28:42,040 --> 00:28:46,320
Speaker 1: And he said, it has nothing to do with you

508
00:28:46,960 --> 00:28:50,480
Speaker 1: going to the NFL. God is going to use you

509
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,600
Speaker 1: to do mighty things regardless.

510
00:28:56,000 --> 00:28:58,200
Speaker 3: Yeah.

511
00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:00,840
Speaker 1: And you know the way I grew up, you know,

512
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:05,160
Speaker 1: people picked on handicapped people, picked on the homeless people,

513
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 1: you know, ladies. Nobody was spared yea. And I could

514
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:11,480
Speaker 1: have said, well you homeless, how you gonna tell me?

515
00:29:12,280 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 1: But I received it from him absolutely only to develop

516
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:20,240
Speaker 1: this relationship with him over the next few weeks, and

517
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,680
Speaker 1: I asked him the question. I was like, hey, if

518
00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:24,480
Speaker 1: you don't mind me asking, how did you end up

519
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:28,080
Speaker 1: in this situation? He said, if I told you that

520
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:32,280
Speaker 1: I was a CEO of a major company with a nice,

521
00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:37,600
Speaker 1: beautiful home, great family, two beautiful daughters, would you believe me?

522
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:41,600
Speaker 1: And I said, if that's what you say your story is,

523
00:29:41,640 --> 00:29:45,360
Speaker 1: that's all I would have to go on. And he said,

524
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:49,720
Speaker 1: that's exactly what my life used to be. Gambling, drugs

525
00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:55,640
Speaker 1: and alcohol took me away from my family. And so

526
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:58,760
Speaker 1: within a matter of meeting him in the beginning of

527
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 1: the year, towards the end of the season, I found

528
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:05,760
Speaker 1: out that my high school football coach was best friends

529
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:10,160
Speaker 1: with his ex wife. Oh wow, So then I asked him.

530
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:12,120
Speaker 1: I was like, I asked my high school football coach.

531
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:16,200
Speaker 1: You know, it's it's you know, such and such going

532
00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:17,560
Speaker 1: to be at the banquet is year. I heard she

533
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:20,400
Speaker 1: usually comes. And he was like, how do you know her?

534
00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:21,920
Speaker 1: And I was like, oh, I just heard a lot

535
00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:25,840
Speaker 1: about her, you know, And uh, mind you also too.

536
00:30:25,920 --> 00:30:28,800
Speaker 1: Matt Fryar and Todd Fryar their father. Their dad owned

537
00:30:28,840 --> 00:30:33,360
Speaker 1: their family owned Wayne Fryer Mobile Homes, which was the

538
00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: largest mobile home distribution manufacturer in the Southeast. And Matt

539
00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:43,040
Speaker 1: used to always, I mean, Todd used to always want

540
00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:46,680
Speaker 1: me to go to church with him. Todd's white we

541
00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:48,960
Speaker 1: en live of it's a white church.

542
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:51,760
Speaker 2: I grew up in all white church. I grew up

543
00:30:51,760 --> 00:30:53,520
Speaker 2: with Simi as of guys. I was only black family.

544
00:30:54,600 --> 00:30:56,960
Speaker 2: So I ended up going to church with him.

545
00:30:57,320 --> 00:31:02,240
Speaker 1: And you know, I asked him, you know, do you

546
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 1: mind if if this gentleman comes the next week?

547
00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 2: You know?

548
00:31:07,080 --> 00:31:10,520
Speaker 1: And He's like, yeah, sure, And so I asked him,

549
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 1: you know that Thursday following Thursday, I said, hey, you

550
00:31:12,520 --> 00:31:14,000
Speaker 1: want to go to church with us a Sunday the

551
00:31:14,760 --> 00:31:17,440
Speaker 1: homeless guy. He's like, man, yes, man, I've been wanting

552
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:19,440
Speaker 1: to go to the house god, you know, just kind

553
00:31:19,440 --> 00:31:21,920
Speaker 1: of be But I don't have any clothes. And I

554
00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: was like, well, bro, I don't know if you see

555
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 1: me dressed, but I don't have the best to clothes either,

556
00:31:27,120 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 1: And Jesus said, come as you are there it is.

557
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 1: So he was like, all right, but how am I

558
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:33,479
Speaker 1: going to get there this? And now I say, well,

559
00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:36,160
Speaker 1: I'm going to have the boys Ranch brand driver pick

560
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,560
Speaker 1: you up because there's a couple of us that are

561
00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,800
Speaker 1: going to go to church. So meet me here at

562
00:31:41,800 --> 00:31:43,320
Speaker 1: the school. We'll pick you up. You can go to

563
00:31:43,400 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 1: church with us, and then we'll go. It's a Piccadilly

564
00:31:48,200 --> 00:31:49,760
Speaker 1: you know. I don't know if you ever ate there,

565
00:31:49,760 --> 00:31:52,320
Speaker 1: but it's like a bus or whatever. So I was like,

566
00:31:52,360 --> 00:31:54,360
Speaker 1: and then you can go to Piccadilly with us afterwards.

567
00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:58,680
Speaker 1: And so he went to church, and I mean, I

568
00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:03,240
Speaker 1: just saw this dude, like, I mean, I get chills

569
00:32:03,360 --> 00:32:05,720
Speaker 1: just like thinking about it. I just saw this guy

570
00:32:06,320 --> 00:32:12,760
Speaker 1: like so happy and honor to just be in the

571
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:19,400
Speaker 1: presence of God, and watching him worship the way that

572
00:32:19,440 --> 00:32:27,120
Speaker 1: he worshiped was what I thought Jesus should do for everybody.

573
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:34,400
Speaker 1: I felt like, here's a man that doesn't have, essentially

574
00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:40,280
Speaker 1: in the world's eyes, anything, and he is giving everything

575
00:32:41,360 --> 00:32:46,080
Speaker 1: in this moment to be thankful and grateful for just

576
00:32:46,120 --> 00:32:48,720
Speaker 1: having the opportunity to be in the presence of God.

577
00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:58,360
Speaker 1: So long and short of that story is I help

578
00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:03,080
Speaker 1: this guy get a job at thirteen years old. This

579
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:07,320
Speaker 1: guy ended up running the company. By the time I

580
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:16,920
Speaker 1: was a sophomore in college. He had remarried to another wife,

581
00:33:18,000 --> 00:33:20,440
Speaker 1: the part of the store that's the most powerful part

582
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 1: of the story is that, yes, his ex wife came

583
00:33:22,920 --> 00:33:28,400
Speaker 1: to the banquet, and I had invited him to the banquet.

584
00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:31,200
Speaker 1: And we're sitting there at the table as me and him, JW. Hardy,

585
00:33:31,240 --> 00:33:34,000
Speaker 1: and three people from the boys ranch. JW was one

586
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,160
Speaker 1: of my boys. He played football, but he's also had

587
00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:42,600
Speaker 1: the boys ranch with me raising hell and his ex

588
00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:48,640
Speaker 1: wife comes in with his daughters and she instantly sees

589
00:33:48,720 --> 00:33:54,560
Speaker 1: him and she just starts bawling, crying. He gets ready

590
00:33:54,560 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: to get up and says, man, I knew I shouldn't

591
00:33:57,200 --> 00:34:03,960
Speaker 1: have come. I'm sorry, And a gentleman stops him and says, no, man,

592
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:07,200
Speaker 1: please don't leave. He say, me and my wife pray

593
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:13,839
Speaker 1: for you every night. He hadn't seen his daughters in

594
00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:27,240
Speaker 1: almost three years. And the husband says, my wife grew

595
00:34:27,320 --> 00:34:31,680
Speaker 1: up in an alcoholic family. Oh, that was the biggest

596
00:34:31,680 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 1: trigger for her, and she didn't want her daughters to

597
00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:44,080
Speaker 1: be in that situation. So now this man is seeing

598
00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:47,279
Speaker 1: his daughters for the first time. Now they're reconnecting. He's

599
00:34:47,440 --> 00:34:50,880
Speaker 1: friends with his ex wife. Is it's just a beautiful

600
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:54,520
Speaker 1: thing to see. And so when I'm in college, you

601
00:34:54,520 --> 00:35:00,279
Speaker 1: know a couple of years. A few years later, he

602
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:02,840
Speaker 1: came to one of my games. He's the biggest Florida

603
00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:05,719
Speaker 1: State fan ever, so for him to come to a

604
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:06,640
Speaker 1: Gator game.

605
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:14,360
Speaker 3: Was a big deal. He came to the game him.

606
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:20,680
Speaker 1: Patrick Minogue, another guy from the Boys ranch, and like

607
00:35:20,920 --> 00:35:23,239
Speaker 1: his family, they all came to the game to root

608
00:35:23,320 --> 00:35:28,680
Speaker 1: for me. And after the game. I'm a sophomore inner,

609
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:32,520
Speaker 1: so I'm like nineteen. I met him when I was thirteen.

610
00:35:34,520 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 1: He says, you remember when I told you that God

611
00:35:37,800 --> 00:35:40,040
Speaker 1: is going to do mighty things for you through you,

612
00:35:43,120 --> 00:35:47,200
Speaker 1: He said, at thirteen years old, you helped me get

613
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:54,680
Speaker 1: a job, reconnect with my family, and seek God for

614
00:35:54,760 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 1: who he is. You put me in the presence of God.

615
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:02,200
Speaker 1: I didn't even think I deserved to be in the

616
00:36:02,239 --> 00:36:05,760
Speaker 1: presence of God.

617
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:09,680
Speaker 3: So men.

618
00:36:10,880 --> 00:36:21,560
Speaker 1: Out there, especially black men, but all men. Literally, life

619
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:23,280
Speaker 1: is hard for all of us. We all are dealing

620
00:36:23,280 --> 00:36:26,160
Speaker 1: with different traumas, triggers, etc. And most of those traumas

621
00:36:26,160 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 1: and triggers that are projected onto us, we don't even

622
00:36:29,960 --> 00:36:34,120
Speaker 1: get a chance to process these things because we're not

623
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:37,960
Speaker 1: supposed to have feelings. We're supposed to be logical, we're

624
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:41,359
Speaker 1: supposed to. You know, women are allowed to just fly

625
00:36:41,440 --> 00:36:44,480
Speaker 1: off the handle and you're just supposed to love them

626
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:51,239
Speaker 1: for whatever, which takes us to a place where we

627
00:36:51,239 --> 00:36:54,040
Speaker 1: don't seem to want to be vulnerable or be feel

628
00:36:54,080 --> 00:36:56,839
Speaker 1: safe or you know. And then you hear them say, well,

629
00:36:56,840 --> 00:36:58,640
Speaker 1: we should go to counseling. Well, you don't want to

630
00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,640
Speaker 1: go to counseling with them. And it's not that you

631
00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:03,560
Speaker 1: don't want to go to counseling with them, it's actually

632
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:06,600
Speaker 1: that you don't feel safe and you don't feel like

633
00:37:06,640 --> 00:37:10,520
Speaker 1: it's a space of vulnerability. I can tell you with

634
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:15,040
Speaker 1: one certainty as a person that has consistently and will

635
00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:18,560
Speaker 1: consistently do the work on my own, that counseling is

636
00:37:18,600 --> 00:37:23,040
Speaker 1: definitely something that you should do for yourself because it

637
00:37:23,080 --> 00:37:26,759
Speaker 1: will benefit your family, It would benefit everyone around you

638
00:37:26,880 --> 00:37:30,120
Speaker 1: so much better, and you'll feel more free to be

639
00:37:30,200 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 1: able if you do have to go into a space,

640
00:37:32,239 --> 00:37:36,560
Speaker 1: even if it's counseling with your friends. You'll see the

641
00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:39,960
Speaker 1: benefit in the growth that can happen when you're a

642
00:37:40,040 --> 00:37:43,160
Speaker 1: healed person versus a person that's like trying to figure

643
00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:45,920
Speaker 1: everything out. We all trying to figure everything out, We're

644
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:50,440
Speaker 1: all trying to be the best version of ourselves, and

645
00:37:50,480 --> 00:37:53,439
Speaker 1: sometimes it takes people a certain time period to get there.

646
00:37:54,600 --> 00:37:58,000
Speaker 1: And for the women that are in these men's lives,

647
00:37:58,040 --> 00:38:00,080
Speaker 1: like you shouldn't. You can't tell a grown man and

648
00:38:01,000 --> 00:38:05,160
Speaker 1: what he should be doing, like you don't want him

649
00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:07,760
Speaker 1: to turn around and be like, well, you know, Stacey

650
00:38:07,840 --> 00:38:10,200
Speaker 1: cook for her husband every night, you know, And she

651
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:12,359
Speaker 1: cook and she clean and she do all these things

652
00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:14,120
Speaker 1: this and that, because the first thing you're gonna say is,

653
00:38:14,160 --> 00:38:18,680
Speaker 1: I'm not Stacy exactly. I'm mean, you married me, You're

654
00:38:18,680 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 1: with me. I don't compare my kids to anybody else.

655
00:38:22,640 --> 00:38:24,560
Speaker 1: I don't tell my kids, well, why can't you just

656
00:38:24,600 --> 00:38:27,760
Speaker 1: be like Bobby and and he do this for his parents,

657
00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:30,560
Speaker 1: and they do this, and they do this like comparison

658
00:38:30,840 --> 00:38:36,080
Speaker 1: is the thief of joy yep in any regard. And

659
00:38:36,160 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: you know, the beauty about where I am in life today,

660
00:38:41,440 --> 00:38:48,920
Speaker 1: nobody compares to me. I'm a free man. Nobody compares

661
00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:53,360
Speaker 1: to That is buller And that is not a ego talking.

662
00:38:54,640 --> 00:38:57,920
Speaker 1: That is a healed man that understands and knows who

663
00:38:57,960 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 1: he is more so now than and he knew at

664
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:04,359
Speaker 1: eight years old, twelve years old, seventeen years old now

665
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:09,200
Speaker 1: forty eight. So you can't tell me nothing literally about

666
00:39:09,239 --> 00:39:11,720
Speaker 1: myself that I'm not willing to tell you about yourself.

667
00:39:11,760 --> 00:39:15,760
Speaker 1: I'm not ashamed of anything from my past. That's good,

668
00:39:16,040 --> 00:39:18,120
Speaker 1: So nobody can use that as a weapon against me.

669
00:39:18,160 --> 00:39:20,080
Speaker 1: So you might have said, oh, yeah, man, you remember

670
00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:21,680
Speaker 1: you cussed out such and so I sure do.

671
00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:25,279
Speaker 2: So that is you know, That is what this whole

672
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:27,759
Speaker 2: platform was built on. This whole platform was built in

673
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:31,520
Speaker 2: twenty twenty of me saying, I said, journey with me

674
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:34,360
Speaker 2: as I discover, uncovered, recover love, and I use this

675
00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:38,120
Speaker 2: platform as my own personal space of healing where I said, hey,

676
00:39:38,360 --> 00:39:41,120
Speaker 2: I was married for almost ten years. Two weeks shot

677
00:39:41,280 --> 00:39:44,440
Speaker 2: ten years, I cheated on my ex wife after I

678
00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:48,200
Speaker 2: filed for divorce two weeks shot of ten years of marriage,

679
00:39:48,239 --> 00:39:50,279
Speaker 2: I said, I need to become a better man. And

680
00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:52,720
Speaker 2: then I ended up creating this platform five years later

681
00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:55,920
Speaker 2: to heal and have conversations with people that would be

682
00:39:55,960 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 2: transparent and vulnerable. The Bible says that people overcome by

683
00:39:58,680 --> 00:40:00,760
Speaker 2: the word of our testimony, the blood of the Lamb.

684
00:40:00,920 --> 00:40:03,320
Speaker 2: So I said, I want to find transparent, vulnerable people

685
00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:05,680
Speaker 2: that can sit on that yellow couch and openly share

686
00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:09,400
Speaker 2: about their idio secrecies, things that they've mistakes that they've made,

687
00:40:09,600 --> 00:40:12,800
Speaker 2: places that they want to heal in whether they're married, single, divorce,

688
00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:16,360
Speaker 2: people have dealt with bearing their the loves of their lives.

689
00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:19,480
Speaker 2: Let's have conversations so that we can glean insights. And

690
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:22,040
Speaker 2: so I love the language of which you're speaking, because

691
00:40:22,080 --> 00:40:24,279
Speaker 2: this is totally the heart posture of the dear future

692
00:40:24,280 --> 00:40:28,279
Speaker 2: WIFEI podcast. How did your dating life look coming from

693
00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:31,600
Speaker 2: that seventeen years old, forgiving your mom of that being

694
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 2: very instrumental in the life of this homeless man, watching

695
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,719
Speaker 2: God use you at a very young age. How did

696
00:40:36,760 --> 00:40:38,480
Speaker 2: that show up in your dating life? What kind of

697
00:40:38,480 --> 00:40:42,680
Speaker 2: decisions were you making, especially in college, you know what

698
00:40:42,719 --> 00:40:45,279
Speaker 2: I'm saying, having to pick of the litter you down

699
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:48,759
Speaker 2: there in Florida, all these women doing what women do?

700
00:40:49,080 --> 00:40:50,719
Speaker 1: What did that look like? And how did that show

701
00:40:50,800 --> 00:40:53,880
Speaker 1: up in your day life? Well, I mean, if I

702
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:58,920
Speaker 1: told you this today, it would to a lot of

703
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:02,960
Speaker 1: people like date a lot of people in college. I

704
00:41:03,280 --> 00:41:07,280
Speaker 1: didn't have a girlfriend in high school, like I was

705
00:41:07,320 --> 00:41:09,479
Speaker 1: like I think I felt like I was an ugly

706
00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 1: duckling in middle school. In high school, like I didn't

707
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,719
Speaker 1: have a lot of dating experiences.

708
00:41:14,719 --> 00:41:16,759
Speaker 2: Say dating you'd have a girlfriend, you wouldn't you wun't

709
00:41:16,760 --> 00:41:17,400
Speaker 2: smash nobody.

710
00:41:17,520 --> 00:41:18,600
Speaker 3: No, no, I can't say that.

711
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:25,880
Speaker 1: Okay, when we talked relationships, you actually relationships. I ain't saying.

712
00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:30,200
Speaker 1: I ain't saying I wasn't no lose you just wasn't

713
00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:32,800
Speaker 1: a committed relationships, just was it I had? I had.

714
00:41:32,960 --> 00:41:38,040
Speaker 1: I had two committed relationships in college. And if I

715
00:41:38,080 --> 00:41:41,080
Speaker 1: think about like those two, both of those two women

716
00:41:41,120 --> 00:41:45,200
Speaker 1: now like i'm I'm, I'm still I would consider friends

717
00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:48,560
Speaker 1: with I don't talk to them on a regular basis cordial,

718
00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:51,640
Speaker 1: but we are very cordial. I'm super proud of both

719
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:53,520
Speaker 1: of them. I would mention them by name, but I

720
00:41:53,560 --> 00:41:56,280
Speaker 1: don't want they I don't want nobody to go whatever.

721
00:41:56,680 --> 00:41:59,360
Speaker 1: But you know, there are two women that I dated

722
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:03,080
Speaker 1: in college that were phenomenal women, and to see them

723
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:08,600
Speaker 1: now as mothers and wives, I definitely had my fair

724
00:42:08,640 --> 00:42:13,000
Speaker 1: share of really good women in my life. And I

725
00:42:13,040 --> 00:42:16,040
Speaker 1: didn't really to be transparent and honest with you, like

726
00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 1: I didn't know what a good woman for me. Was

727
00:42:23,640 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 1: still on this journey to find out what's a good

728
00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:27,239
Speaker 1: woman for me?

729
00:42:27,360 --> 00:42:31,080
Speaker 2: You still feel like that right now, forty eight evolved

730
00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:33,839
Speaker 2: mostly intelligent. You still feel like you struggle with what

731
00:42:33,880 --> 00:42:34,920
Speaker 2: a good woman looks like?

732
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,200
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, I don't feel like I struggle what

733
00:42:37,280 --> 00:42:40,239
Speaker 1: a good woman looks like for you, But for me,

734
00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:43,560
Speaker 1: I know what I need, So you know what you need? Yes, okay,

735
00:42:43,719 --> 00:42:48,080
Speaker 1: now what I want? I know what I need. There's

736
00:42:48,120 --> 00:42:51,879
Speaker 1: a big difference absolutely at forty eight. It ain't about

737
00:42:51,920 --> 00:42:55,320
Speaker 1: once because even those ones says that they can satisfy

738
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:58,600
Speaker 1: you now, but give it about five or six more years,

739
00:42:58,680 --> 00:43:02,200
Speaker 1: and you know, things start changing and stuff start hanging,

740
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:04,960
Speaker 1: and you know, I'm trying to hold on to this

741
00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:07,120
Speaker 1: little thing I got right now as long as I can't,

742
00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:17,239
Speaker 1: because what I need is a woman that understands that

743
00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:21,480
Speaker 1: I am a man with purpose and I am not

744
00:43:21,600 --> 00:43:23,480
Speaker 1: going to shy away from my purpose.

745
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:24,120
Speaker 3: There it is.

746
00:43:24,440 --> 00:43:27,120
Speaker 1: I'm going to walk in it. I'm going to be obedient.

747
00:43:27,160 --> 00:43:30,200
Speaker 1: There's no sacrifice greater than the obedience that I am

748
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:36,000
Speaker 1: committed to doing within my purpose. And some people will

749
00:43:36,000 --> 00:43:38,880
Speaker 1: say that's very selfish. You can call it what you want.

750
00:43:39,000 --> 00:43:41,920
Speaker 1: There's somebody out there that will love me absolutely and

751
00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:45,799
Speaker 1: understand that you know what I am because he is

752
00:43:45,800 --> 00:43:49,200
Speaker 1: the greatest version of himself, he will be able to

753
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:52,759
Speaker 1: greet the greatest version of a husband. To me, that part,

754
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:59,000
Speaker 1: I don't have a list because to me, those that

755
00:43:59,120 --> 00:44:03,879
Speaker 1: you know have these lists. What happens when they check

756
00:44:03,920 --> 00:44:06,279
Speaker 1: off a bunch of stuff, but then they stop doing

757
00:44:06,280 --> 00:44:08,120
Speaker 1: a certain certain things that are on the list.

758
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:09,880
Speaker 2: Then you want to check them off out the equations

759
00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:12,759
Speaker 2: that I want to be exactly.

760
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,440
Speaker 1: That's not that's not so. There's so many different components

761
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:18,799
Speaker 1: of love that are built under a godpeep and for me,

762
00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:21,440
Speaker 1: I want in a gape love absolutely because I know

763
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:24,160
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get on your damn nerves, I'm gonna piss

764
00:44:24,239 --> 00:44:26,440
Speaker 1: you off, I'm gonna make you mad, I'm gonna make

765
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 1: you happy as hell in one minute, and the next

766
00:44:28,520 --> 00:44:31,759
Speaker 1: minute you're gonna be like this Negro is crazy. And

767
00:44:31,840 --> 00:44:34,839
Speaker 1: I'm not afraid of any of those aspects because guess

768
00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:38,720
Speaker 1: what it's gonna be some times that I'm gonna say this, Negro,

769
00:44:38,840 --> 00:44:45,560
Speaker 1: it's crazy. And there's a Again, there's a freedom in

770
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,279
Speaker 1: knowing that you can be who you are and that

771
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:51,680
Speaker 1: person leave and yeah, like not that they're not even

772
00:44:51,760 --> 00:44:55,040
Speaker 1: not necessarily even that they're never gonna leaves that they

773
00:44:55,080 --> 00:44:59,800
Speaker 1: see you past, that they see you past these things,

774
00:45:00,280 --> 00:45:03,120
Speaker 1: and I can't be I know for a fact for me,

775
00:45:03,280 --> 00:45:07,160
Speaker 1: and I talk about it on the show. Like some

776
00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:10,120
Speaker 1: people think that I don't regard feelings because I'd be like,

777
00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:13,759
Speaker 1: I don't care about your feelings. I do care about

778
00:45:13,760 --> 00:45:16,560
Speaker 1: your feelings. But if your feelings don't have anything with

779
00:45:16,719 --> 00:45:21,799
Speaker 1: anything I said or I did, I can't take responsibility

780
00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:24,719
Speaker 1: for that. I take I can't. So somebody comes to you,

781
00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:29,560
Speaker 1: I mean, if you're everybody know you got a fiance, right, yeah, Okay,

782
00:45:30,520 --> 00:45:31,239
Speaker 1: which I met her.

783
00:45:31,239 --> 00:45:33,080
Speaker 3: She's she's right here.

784
00:45:33,719 --> 00:45:36,319
Speaker 2: She's getting a chance to watch the feelming of dear

785
00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:41,560
Speaker 2: future wifey for the first time. You special, I'm honored. Yeah,

786
00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:47,520
Speaker 2: go ahead, shout out. He did drop the fund of

787
00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:48,920
Speaker 2: a fun fact right there. It is.

788
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:50,920
Speaker 3: Yeah.

789
00:45:51,000 --> 00:45:57,000
Speaker 1: So, if your soon to be wife came to you

790
00:45:57,360 --> 00:46:01,680
Speaker 1: and you had a conversation with her and you expressed

791
00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:07,440
Speaker 1: all these things that you saw that were wrong, and

792
00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:11,040
Speaker 1: you did it very clear, because that's what most men

793
00:46:11,080 --> 00:46:13,280
Speaker 1: want to do. You just want to get to the point.

794
00:46:13,640 --> 00:46:15,440
Speaker 3: Yeah.

795
00:46:15,520 --> 00:46:19,360
Speaker 1: And she turns around and she says, well, I feel

796
00:46:19,360 --> 00:46:25,719
Speaker 1: like you don't understand because you know you would do this,

797
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:28,200
Speaker 1: if you knew this and you would do this, and

798
00:46:28,239 --> 00:46:30,839
Speaker 1: if you would do that, and I feel like you

799
00:46:30,880 --> 00:46:33,600
Speaker 1: don't care about X, Y and Z and YadA, YadA, YadA.

800
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:36,319
Speaker 1: So like now you have just literally taken all these

801
00:46:36,360 --> 00:46:38,560
Speaker 1: feelings that I have given you as a man and

802
00:46:38,840 --> 00:46:41,880
Speaker 1: all this vulnerability that I've given you as a man,

803
00:46:42,080 --> 00:46:45,759
Speaker 1: and you have made it about yourself. But if you

804
00:46:45,840 --> 00:46:50,440
Speaker 1: come back to me and you say, well, you said

805
00:46:50,600 --> 00:46:55,799
Speaker 1: this and it made me feel this way, absolutely I

806
00:46:55,840 --> 00:47:00,200
Speaker 1: can be accountable for that. I can address that. I

807
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:02,120
Speaker 1: can't address something that I don't even know what you're

808
00:47:02,120 --> 00:47:05,399
Speaker 1: talking about, because I get I literally just said all

809
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:05,960
Speaker 1: these things.

810
00:47:06,040 --> 00:47:06,320
Speaker 3: Yep.

811
00:47:07,480 --> 00:47:12,719
Speaker 1: So are you listening to respond? Are you talking to

812
00:47:12,800 --> 00:47:19,440
Speaker 1: be heard? Or are you communicating to grow? That's my

813
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:24,440
Speaker 1: question to any woman or any man in a conversation.

814
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:26,719
Speaker 1: I'm not going to go back and forth with you.

815
00:47:27,160 --> 00:47:29,920
Speaker 1: I'm not about to argue with you. I will literally

816
00:47:29,920 --> 00:47:32,279
Speaker 1: say all right, cool. So that's why people think you'll

817
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:34,960
Speaker 1: have no emotions? Is that what he feels like? Yeah,

818
00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 1: because I'm just real cutting your rye. Well, I do

819
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:45,359
Speaker 1: have emotions, but I can't get emotional. Why is it?

820
00:47:46,360 --> 00:47:50,839
Speaker 2: What is the conundrum when you say emotional, But I

821
00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:52,360
Speaker 2: have emotions.

822
00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:58,480
Speaker 1: Because if I act on my emotions, I'm not I'm

823
00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 1: not operating in my superpower. A man that is controlled

824
00:48:04,560 --> 00:48:09,880
Speaker 1: in his emotions, in his anger, in his fears, is

825
00:48:09,920 --> 00:48:13,040
Speaker 1: a man that's more powerful to be able to elicit

826
00:48:15,200 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 1: and hear someone's emotions and not be phased, you know,

827
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:22,480
Speaker 1: in the same way that other people are faced.

828
00:48:22,840 --> 00:48:24,440
Speaker 3: Let me ask you this episode five.

829
00:48:24,480 --> 00:48:27,319
Speaker 2: I just watched that and you said it was a

830
00:48:27,360 --> 00:48:29,319
Speaker 2: test to have you.

831
00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:31,000
Speaker 3: Know, to do what Tyson was doing.

832
00:48:31,040 --> 00:48:32,839
Speaker 2: Tyson was in one of my plays I did years

833
00:48:32,840 --> 00:48:36,840
Speaker 2: ago when I used to do plays. But the list

834
00:48:36,840 --> 00:48:39,279
Speaker 2: that Tyson has where women signed up to date him,

835
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:40,719
Speaker 2: and you were talking to.

836
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:43,840
Speaker 3: The date on the show Yaria.

837
00:48:44,200 --> 00:48:46,239
Speaker 2: She had DM me a couple of months ago and

838
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:48,000
Speaker 2: asked to be on the Dear Free Twife podcast live

839
00:48:48,040 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 2: in Houston. She said, Hey, I'm not willing to be

840
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:53,160
Speaker 2: on this list. I don't want to be on no list.

841
00:48:53,200 --> 00:48:56,359
Speaker 2: I'm not going to go out like that. You said, Hey,

842
00:48:56,680 --> 00:48:58,600
Speaker 2: that was a test. Was that actual test?

843
00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:02,239
Speaker 1: It was actual test because in the confines of what

844
00:49:02,400 --> 00:49:09,120
Speaker 1: we're at right now, it is a dating journey for

845
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:13,480
Speaker 1: all of us. If you notice and watch on the show.

846
00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:16,399
Speaker 1: There are several people that didn't get any attention from

847
00:49:16,400 --> 00:49:20,919
Speaker 1: absolutely because I was not interested. That wasn't interesting because

848
00:49:20,920 --> 00:49:23,600
Speaker 1: they're all were beautiful, they're all you know, successful in

849
00:49:23,640 --> 00:49:26,560
Speaker 1: their own rights, but because there were things like some

850
00:49:26,719 --> 00:49:30,759
Speaker 1: wanted to have kids. Yeah I would, that's not going

851
00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:35,560
Speaker 1: to happen here. Some people I'm just wasn't attracted to

852
00:49:35,760 --> 00:49:39,000
Speaker 1: from a spirits like, it's just different. Everybody's attracted to

853
00:49:39,000 --> 00:49:42,080
Speaker 1: who they're attracted to, and it's fine. But for me,

854
00:49:42,160 --> 00:49:48,719
Speaker 1: it's like, okay, if I did put up a list,

855
00:49:50,640 --> 00:49:53,319
Speaker 1: if you're saying you're genuinely interested in me, for me,

856
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:57,800
Speaker 1: you understand that I've said this, whether it's on camera

857
00:49:57,880 --> 00:50:02,680
Speaker 1: off camera, Ladies and gentlemen, I'm here on a journey

858
00:50:02,760 --> 00:50:05,440
Speaker 1: and whatever I need to do to get through this

859
00:50:05,560 --> 00:50:09,400
Speaker 1: journey to hopefully if this person is in this space,

860
00:50:10,520 --> 00:50:13,560
Speaker 1: do that. We got a very short period of time

861
00:50:14,200 --> 00:50:17,880
Speaker 1: to do it. So if you're interested, you can let

862
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:20,919
Speaker 1: it be known and show it be known. And it's

863
00:50:21,160 --> 00:50:25,600
Speaker 1: twenty one of y'all and three of us, right, yeah,

864
00:50:25,920 --> 00:50:29,360
Speaker 1: so show me some inchho like, show me like because

865
00:50:30,680 --> 00:50:33,400
Speaker 1: you're looking at this from like your ego getting in

866
00:50:33,400 --> 00:50:37,879
Speaker 1: a way at this point to me because somebody say, Man,

867
00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:40,320
Speaker 1: I gotta wait in the line for like, I gotta

868
00:50:40,320 --> 00:50:41,840
Speaker 1: wait in the line for like an hour and a

869
00:50:41,920 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 1: half to be you know, on it to get to

870
00:50:46,600 --> 00:50:49,799
Speaker 1: get this car. If I really want that car, you're

871
00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:51,720
Speaker 1: gonna be in that line. I'm gonna be in that line.

872
00:50:51,840 --> 00:50:53,319
Speaker 1: I can't be like, man, I'm tight and so nil,

873
00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:55,200
Speaker 1: I don't stand in no line, Like, let me see

874
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:57,120
Speaker 1: if I can call such and such skip against the line,

875
00:50:57,120 --> 00:50:59,280
Speaker 1: this and that. No, I'm gonna wait. No, you'll probably

876
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:01,600
Speaker 1: make some phone calls. Yeah, I wouldn't make some phone calls.

877
00:51:02,120 --> 00:51:05,279
Speaker 1: I would definitely make some phone calls. But if even so,

878
00:51:05,640 --> 00:51:08,399
Speaker 1: I have to also look at the situation. Yeah, if

879
00:51:08,440 --> 00:51:11,239
Speaker 1: I'm in the line, Lebron James is in the line, yeah,

880
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:14,160
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get Hey, I just got to sit in

881
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:16,600
Speaker 1: here and sit in the line. If Lebron James couldn't

882
00:51:16,640 --> 00:51:20,920
Speaker 1: call nobody, Barrock Obama in the line, who.

883
00:51:20,760 --> 00:51:24,440
Speaker 3: Am I exactly ain't gonna scare nobody.

884
00:51:24,480 --> 00:51:27,920
Speaker 1: So it's like, you know, I do test people because

885
00:51:27,920 --> 00:51:31,640
Speaker 1: I want to know, like, how easy is it for

886
00:51:31,680 --> 00:51:32,880
Speaker 1: you to quit something?

887
00:51:33,520 --> 00:51:36,400
Speaker 3: How easy is it for you to be disinterested? In something.

888
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:38,520
Speaker 1: So you do that in your regular day life every day.

889
00:51:38,560 --> 00:51:42,440
Speaker 1: I do that with guys, girls, my kids. You're testing everybody.

890
00:51:42,560 --> 00:51:46,239
Speaker 1: Do they know you're testing them? Sometimes? Sometimes they do.

891
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:50,480
Speaker 1: Sometimes your kids start catching on, Oh they do. So

892
00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:52,920
Speaker 1: my kids test me too though. It's awesome.

893
00:51:53,040 --> 00:51:57,880
Speaker 3: Yeah. So, like I give you a perfect case of it.

894
00:51:57,960 --> 00:52:04,359
Speaker 1: My oldest son, TJ, so he knows he knows how

895
00:52:04,400 --> 00:52:07,160
Speaker 1: to talk to me a certain way that will make

896
00:52:07,239 --> 00:52:10,120
Speaker 1: me like literally be like here, man, just get it.

897
00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:17,520
Speaker 1: So he uh, he wanted to get another car. So

898
00:52:17,560 --> 00:52:21,480
Speaker 1: he calls me and be like young King. This is

899
00:52:21,520 --> 00:52:27,880
Speaker 1: long before yeah, young King. I was like, I know

900
00:52:27,920 --> 00:52:29,719
Speaker 1: we're not supposed to cuss on him, but I was like, TJ,

901
00:52:29,800 --> 00:52:30,879
Speaker 1: what if you won't?

902
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:31,520
Speaker 3: You know.

903
00:52:33,719 --> 00:52:37,279
Speaker 1: He's like, Dad that I'll just calling you to chat

904
00:52:37,320 --> 00:52:38,920
Speaker 1: with you Van, tell you I'm proud of.

905
00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:44,239
Speaker 3: You all this. Yeah, just butter me. Yeah yeah.

906
00:52:44,280 --> 00:52:47,439
Speaker 1: So he gets to the point and I'm like, yeah,

907
00:52:47,960 --> 00:52:50,560
Speaker 1: it's just making me laugh, you know what I mean.

908
00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:53,879
Speaker 1: But at the same talken like you know the one

909
00:52:53,920 --> 00:52:56,640
Speaker 1: thing he does and then Titus has started doing it too.

910
00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:00,000
Speaker 1: They both calling it's like, uh, hey, what's up, handsome

911
00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:09,960
Speaker 1: because they've heard me say like, women calling me fine

912
00:53:10,080 --> 00:53:13,040
Speaker 1: is nothing to me. But if a woman calls me

913
00:53:13,120 --> 00:53:18,080
Speaker 1: gorgeous or handsome, got you got me? All the women? Yeah,

914
00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:24,160
Speaker 1: I know I'm fine. I work out every morning. I'm not.

915
00:53:24,400 --> 00:53:26,400
Speaker 1: This is not this is on purpose, you know what

916
00:53:26,480 --> 00:53:30,239
Speaker 1: I'm saying, Like, this is on purpose. I know, like

917
00:53:30,920 --> 00:53:33,439
Speaker 1: I'm working for this, you know what I'm saying. Yeah,

918
00:53:33,560 --> 00:53:36,319
Speaker 1: but one night, ladies you walk up to him and say, hey, hey,

919
00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:37,320
Speaker 1: you got handsome?

920
00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:44,279
Speaker 3: Hey, what's up? Gorgeous? Hey girl? Hey? How they do

921
00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:50,400
Speaker 3: it on the Instagram and say your son do you like? Yeah?

922
00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:53,759
Speaker 1: So they but they're really just tested the waters. But

923
00:53:53,760 --> 00:53:56,840
Speaker 1: they're also doing it in a comedic way, and it's like,

924
00:53:57,760 --> 00:54:01,319
Speaker 1: you know, I love my sons, man, I love my

925
00:54:01,400 --> 00:54:03,759
Speaker 1: daughter too. I got a chance to spend some time

926
00:54:03,840 --> 00:54:07,560
Speaker 1: my daughter. So I adopted my daughter. You know, so

927
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:12,239
Speaker 1: a few years ago and she's at UMass getting ready.

928
00:54:12,960 --> 00:54:15,600
Speaker 1: She plays basketball, and then my oldest son plays football

929
00:54:15,640 --> 00:54:16,280
Speaker 1: at UCF.

930
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:18,759
Speaker 3: Hold on, you can't just talk about adoption. How did

931
00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:20,480
Speaker 3: that work out? Yeah?

932
00:54:20,560 --> 00:54:22,680
Speaker 1: So me and her mom were friends for a long time,

933
00:54:23,680 --> 00:54:27,520
Speaker 1: and her mom had some health complications and she felt like,

934
00:54:27,680 --> 00:54:30,840
Speaker 1: you know, she was going to go through a procedure

935
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:35,560
Speaker 1: and didn't feel like her best and she was like,

936
00:54:35,680 --> 00:54:39,440
Speaker 1: can you do me a favor and please check on

937
00:54:39,520 --> 00:54:41,680
Speaker 1: Leah from time to time if things don't go right?

938
00:54:42,120 --> 00:54:44,920
Speaker 1: And I was like, you know what's going to happen

939
00:54:44,920 --> 00:54:50,520
Speaker 1: if they go wrong? He said, let's be clear, and

940
00:54:50,560 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: she was like, well, you know, she may have to move.

941
00:54:53,440 --> 00:54:57,359
Speaker 1: You know, she's Canadian, her mom's Canadian, and all her

942
00:54:57,360 --> 00:54:58,440
Speaker 1: family's up in Canada.

943
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:02,440
Speaker 3: And I was like, well, what if I adopted her?

944
00:55:03,719 --> 00:55:06,359
Speaker 1: And she was like what And I was like, yeah,

945
00:55:06,400 --> 00:55:09,360
Speaker 1: I've always wanted to have a daughter, and if I

946
00:55:09,400 --> 00:55:11,680
Speaker 1: had a daughter, you know, I'm not physically having any

947
00:55:11,680 --> 00:55:13,840
Speaker 1: more kids, but if I had a daughter, like I would,

948
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:18,759
Speaker 1: Leah would be my first choice, you know. And you

949
00:55:18,760 --> 00:55:22,160
Speaker 1: know it's crazy because the guy had laid on my heart.

950
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:27,960
Speaker 1: Probably in twenty fourteen, I had evacuated my kids up

951
00:55:28,000 --> 00:55:31,120
Speaker 1: to Live Oak. We went to the boy A Youth

952
00:55:31,239 --> 00:55:34,640
Speaker 1: Ranch and all the kids that were in the youth

953
00:55:34,719 --> 00:55:38,480
Speaker 1: Wrench's services were in Live Oak or evacuated up there

954
00:55:38,480 --> 00:55:43,879
Speaker 1: because of a hurricane coming. And there were two seven

955
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:49,000
Speaker 1: year old twins sien s Guy that I just absolutely

956
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:51,760
Speaker 1: fell in love with, and they were in the foster

957
00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:55,680
Speaker 1: care system and they were all over me and I

958
00:55:55,800 --> 00:55:59,080
Speaker 1: just I just literally fell in love with these young ladies.

959
00:55:59,600 --> 00:56:02,400
Speaker 1: And so I talk with Ms. Evans at the Boys

960
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:04,560
Speaker 1: Ranch and I was like, Hey, you know, what would

961
00:56:04,560 --> 00:56:07,000
Speaker 1: be the process of me trying to help this family

962
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:12,680
Speaker 1: and kind of be like, what's their circumstance situation? And

963
00:56:12,719 --> 00:56:16,440
Speaker 1: that was my first like inkling to like maybe adoption

964
00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:18,000
Speaker 1: is the route that I'm going to go to get

965
00:56:18,000 --> 00:56:25,239
Speaker 1: my little girl. And so I started the process of

966
00:56:25,360 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 1: trying to get to the family and get these little

967
00:56:28,200 --> 00:56:32,000
Speaker 1: girls out of the situation. And then probably two months

968
00:56:32,040 --> 00:56:36,600
Speaker 1: into the process, the social worker say, hey, I think

969
00:56:36,600 --> 00:56:39,400
Speaker 1: this is extremely admirable what you're doing, and there's no

970
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:42,360
Speaker 1: question that these young ladies are going to have a

971
00:56:42,400 --> 00:56:45,680
Speaker 1: great life. And but I have to, you know, be

972
00:56:45,760 --> 00:56:49,480
Speaker 1: honest with you about this process because they're in the

973
00:56:49,520 --> 00:56:53,959
Speaker 1: foster program or if they're foster children, mom or dad

974
00:56:54,000 --> 00:56:56,560
Speaker 1: can come up, you know, a couple of years after

975
00:56:56,600 --> 00:57:00,080
Speaker 1: you get these girls and be like I'm ready to

976
00:57:00,120 --> 00:57:01,879
Speaker 1: be a mom now, I'm ready to be a dad

977
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:05,040
Speaker 1: now in unification and you have to, yeah, to end

978
00:57:05,040 --> 00:57:08,719
Speaker 1: it back over and I was like I can't. I mean,

979
00:57:08,760 --> 00:57:12,000
Speaker 1: I just I could not do that to them, and

980
00:57:12,040 --> 00:57:14,880
Speaker 1: I couldn't do it to myself or to my my sons.

981
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:19,400
Speaker 1: So not even a year and a half later, you know,

982
00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:23,320
Speaker 1: that situation happens with with Lia's mom. I've known Liz

983
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:25,200
Speaker 1: since she was like seven years old, so it's not

984
00:57:25,320 --> 00:57:32,200
Speaker 1: She's not a stranger to our family. And I, you know,

985
00:57:32,280 --> 00:57:35,440
Speaker 1: revealed to Carrie that I wanted, you know, to possibly

986
00:57:35,480 --> 00:57:37,160
Speaker 1: adopt her. And then I was like, hold on, let

987
00:57:37,200 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 1: me talk to my sons first, make sure they're okay

988
00:57:40,320 --> 00:57:44,160
Speaker 1: with it, which I knew they would be okay. They were, No,

989
00:57:44,280 --> 00:57:51,240
Speaker 1: they're keeping the girl. Oh Leah, Leah Liz sixteen fifteen,

990
00:57:51,760 --> 00:57:55,040
Speaker 1: she was fifteen when you adopted her. Yeah, so I

991
00:57:55,120 --> 00:57:58,480
Speaker 1: took a little bit, but yeah, it's fifteen when I

992
00:57:58,520 --> 00:58:05,840
Speaker 1: wanted to make the decision, I believe, And so I

993
00:58:05,880 --> 00:58:08,000
Speaker 1: talked to took my boys out of dinner, and I

994
00:58:08,080 --> 00:58:10,560
Speaker 1: hit them with their little favorite like, hey, what's up, handsome.

995
00:58:10,680 --> 00:58:12,919
Speaker 3: What's up? Young? Yeah?

996
00:58:12,920 --> 00:58:15,720
Speaker 1: What's up, young king? So young kings. I got this

997
00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:19,240
Speaker 1: little proposal for y'all. I was like, you know what

998
00:58:19,320 --> 00:58:22,080
Speaker 1: you guys think if I were to adopt Leah, you know,

999
00:58:22,120 --> 00:58:26,520
Speaker 1: into our family, and they were both for it. They

1000
00:58:26,560 --> 00:58:29,680
Speaker 1: knew her, they knew her. And then Titus was like, well,

1001
00:58:29,680 --> 00:58:32,360
Speaker 1: you know we're a competitive family, right, And I was

1002
00:58:32,400 --> 00:58:35,120
Speaker 1: like yeah, she she if she don't know, she's gonna

1003
00:58:35,160 --> 00:58:36,000
Speaker 1: find I find out.

1004
00:58:36,080 --> 00:58:41,280
Speaker 3: Yeah. And so I ended up calling Carrie and.

1005
00:58:43,280 --> 00:58:45,280
Speaker 1: We started talking to her and Leah, and then Leah

1006
00:58:45,400 --> 00:58:47,480
Speaker 1: was like, you know, you know, why, why are you

1007
00:58:47,480 --> 00:58:51,400
Speaker 1: wanting to do this? And I said, well, I've always

1008
00:58:51,440 --> 00:58:55,360
Speaker 1: wanted to be a girl dad, and if I had

1009
00:58:55,360 --> 00:58:59,439
Speaker 1: a daughter, you know, you would be everything and more

1010
00:58:59,480 --> 00:59:05,280
Speaker 1: than I would want and a daughter. And she said, well,

1011
00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:09,760
Speaker 1: you know I'm gay, right, And I said, Leah, this

1012
00:59:09,840 --> 00:59:12,120
Speaker 1: is the time I'm going to guess because I you

1013
00:59:12,200 --> 00:59:14,320
Speaker 1: just got to say, Lee, I don't care if you

1014
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 1: were purple and got streamers flying out of your ass.

1015
00:59:19,000 --> 00:59:21,680
Speaker 1: I'm not here to make you be a certain way.

1016
00:59:21,720 --> 00:59:26,640
Speaker 1: I'm here to help you be the best streamers. Yeah,

1017
00:59:26,760 --> 00:59:29,280
Speaker 1: I'm not here to make you be a certain type

1018
00:59:29,280 --> 00:59:30,880
Speaker 1: of way. I'm here to help you be the best

1019
00:59:30,960 --> 00:59:34,160
Speaker 1: version of yourself. And as long as you are a

1020
00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:36,680
Speaker 1: person of character, I could care less about your sexual

1021
00:59:36,720 --> 00:59:41,760
Speaker 1: orientation or what religious beliefs you want to practice or whatever.

1022
00:59:41,840 --> 00:59:43,600
Speaker 1: Like I can't make you. I don't want to make

1023
00:59:43,680 --> 00:59:46,920
Speaker 1: you anything outside of who you are as a person.

1024
00:59:48,560 --> 00:59:53,720
Speaker 1: And you know, I I talk with the boys, you

1025
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:56,840
Speaker 1: know afterwards. But I realized a lot of the reasons

1026
00:59:56,920 --> 00:59:59,600
Speaker 1: why I've probably been an advocate for the lesbian gay

1027
00:59:59,640 --> 01:00:06,720
Speaker 1: community was because I saw my own family members crucify

1028
01:00:07,400 --> 01:00:12,520
Speaker 1: my favorite aunt who was gay, and she was also

1029
01:00:12,560 --> 01:00:18,280
Speaker 1: the most successful person in our family, Like they would

1030
01:00:18,280 --> 01:00:20,280
Speaker 1: talk crazy to her and this and that, and then

1031
01:00:20,880 --> 01:00:22,800
Speaker 1: it's still family members to this day that I have

1032
01:00:22,880 --> 01:00:24,640
Speaker 1: not spoken to because of how they how.

1033
01:00:24,520 --> 01:00:25,080
Speaker 3: They treat them.

1034
01:00:25,360 --> 01:00:28,680
Speaker 1: As a kid, yeah, and so I have very I

1035
01:00:28,720 --> 01:00:34,840
Speaker 1: have a zero tolerance for, like bullying. I got bullied

1036
01:00:34,840 --> 01:00:38,200
Speaker 1: as a kid. That's why you started fighting a lot.

1037
01:00:38,520 --> 01:00:43,080
Speaker 1: Well I had to fight back. Yeah, but at the

1038
01:00:43,160 --> 01:00:45,040
Speaker 1: count were you were people bullying you then?

1039
01:00:45,160 --> 01:00:46,240
Speaker 3: Or did you become the bully?

1040
01:00:46,960 --> 01:00:47,000
Speaker 4: No?

1041
01:00:47,880 --> 01:00:48,240
Speaker 3: I never.

1042
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 1: I never was the bully. I just had an anger

1043
01:00:51,080 --> 01:00:52,560
Speaker 1: problem and a temper problem.

1044
01:00:52,600 --> 01:00:54,560
Speaker 2: So you're talking about thirty minutes later, he said I

1045
01:00:54,560 --> 01:00:55,600
Speaker 2: would not get another fight.

1046
01:00:55,720 --> 01:00:58,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, somebody said something about, well that's that's why your

1047
01:00:58,320 --> 01:01:02,480
Speaker 1: mom ain't want you, and yeah, yeah, my mom ain't

1048
01:01:02,480 --> 01:01:04,600
Speaker 1: want me. All right, Well, your mom ain't gonn want

1049
01:01:04,600 --> 01:01:06,480
Speaker 1: you either. When I finished with you, she ain't even

1050
01:01:06,520 --> 01:01:10,240
Speaker 1: recognize you. Put these dune dollas on you.

1051
01:01:11,080 --> 01:01:14,000
Speaker 3: Would you always be? Yeah? I was. I was always

1052
01:01:14,680 --> 01:01:16,560
Speaker 3: tall and lenky. I was not big.

1053
01:01:17,040 --> 01:01:19,640
Speaker 1: I didn't gain a lot of weight until I got

1054
01:01:19,680 --> 01:01:22,960
Speaker 1: into a place that like Florida, where I was eating

1055
01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:25,920
Speaker 1: good and lifting good and all that stuff. And you know,

1056
01:01:25,960 --> 01:01:28,240
Speaker 1: it's crazy because my youngest son has kind of got

1057
01:01:28,240 --> 01:01:33,160
Speaker 1: the same frame as me, and the correlation between his

1058
01:01:33,240 --> 01:01:36,760
Speaker 1: freshman and sophomore year and mine is just crazy. Like

1059
01:01:36,840 --> 01:01:39,400
Speaker 1: I wore number fifty three when I first got They

1060
01:01:39,440 --> 01:01:41,880
Speaker 1: just throw you a number, the ugliest number that a

1061
01:01:41,920 --> 01:01:45,640
Speaker 1: defensive end could wear, every three and then coach Sperry

1062
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:49,600
Speaker 1: unretired number eleven and let me wear number eleven at Florida.

1063
01:01:50,320 --> 01:01:53,480
Speaker 1: And then, you know, so I've always wore number eleven

1064
01:01:53,600 --> 01:01:59,160
Speaker 1: or seven basketball or or football. I played multiple sports.

1065
01:01:59,560 --> 01:02:03,160
Speaker 1: And so my youngest son, Titus, was number fifty nine

1066
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:06,040
Speaker 1: when he first think him at number two as a freshman,

1067
01:02:07,080 --> 01:02:11,160
Speaker 1: and then he just got his new number given to him,

1068
01:02:11,320 --> 01:02:16,120
Speaker 1: which he wanted was number seventeen. So he took both

1069
01:02:16,160 --> 01:02:22,200
Speaker 1: of my numbers and combined them to hear my son,

1070
01:02:22,520 --> 01:02:25,120
Speaker 1: you know, and then both of us gained exactly thirteen

1071
01:02:25,120 --> 01:02:28,320
Speaker 1: pounds our freshman the sophomore year. So to hear my

1072
01:02:28,360 --> 01:02:32,960
Speaker 1: youngest son always when people he's done several different interviews,

1073
01:02:33,000 --> 01:02:35,720
Speaker 1: he was like, I play defensive end because of my dad.

1074
01:02:35,760 --> 01:02:37,840
Speaker 1: I wear this number because of my dad. I'll do

1075
01:02:37,920 --> 01:02:39,640
Speaker 1: this because of my dad. Like in high school, he

1076
01:02:39,720 --> 01:02:44,480
Speaker 1: were number eleven, you know, and then TJ wears number sixteen.

1077
01:02:45,000 --> 01:02:47,280
Speaker 2: Well, seventeen is powerful. That's a day you forgave your

1078
01:02:47,360 --> 01:02:50,560
Speaker 2: mom at the age. Yeah, so that's some powerful symbolism there.

1079
01:02:52,640 --> 01:02:55,560
Speaker 2: We have a shared commonality. I adopted two kids. I

1080
01:02:55,600 --> 01:02:58,760
Speaker 2: adopted my nephew at seven and I adopted my son

1081
01:02:58,880 --> 01:03:02,080
Speaker 2: Armiani at sixteen. God told me adopt him at fifteen,

1082
01:03:02,200 --> 01:03:04,920
Speaker 2: and then by time came to pass, it was on

1083
01:03:04,960 --> 01:03:07,560
Speaker 2: the sixteenth birthday. So I always love it when I

1084
01:03:07,640 --> 01:03:12,680
Speaker 2: hear anybody say that they had the compassion to adopt somebody,

1085
01:03:12,800 --> 01:03:13,840
Speaker 2: but especially men.

1086
01:03:14,000 --> 01:03:15,040
Speaker 3: You very rarely.

1087
01:03:15,280 --> 01:03:17,040
Speaker 2: You're probably the only man I've ever talked to that

1088
01:03:17,080 --> 01:03:22,600
Speaker 2: adopted a kid, which is very, very unconventional because as

1089
01:03:23,160 --> 01:03:27,080
Speaker 2: statistics will have it, or what society will say, especially

1090
01:03:27,120 --> 01:03:28,640
Speaker 2: as black men, we only want to take care of

1091
01:03:28,640 --> 01:03:31,320
Speaker 2: our own kids. Let alone goo adopt somebody else's so

1092
01:03:31,440 --> 01:03:36,840
Speaker 2: salute to you, young king for adopting and now you

1093
01:03:36,880 --> 01:03:38,920
Speaker 2: became a girl dad, So that's beautiful.

1094
01:03:38,920 --> 01:03:41,440
Speaker 1: How long how long has she been in your life? Well,

1095
01:03:41,480 --> 01:03:43,160
Speaker 1: she's been in my life since she was seven. She's

1096
01:03:43,240 --> 01:03:46,440
Speaker 1: nineteen now, okay, so I belive she's been a bullard

1097
01:03:46,800 --> 01:03:49,400
Speaker 1: for the last few years, last few years.

1098
01:03:49,520 --> 01:03:53,320
Speaker 2: And take a quick all right, So, first of all,

1099
01:03:53,400 --> 01:03:56,320
Speaker 2: it's very unconventional for you to say what you just said.

1100
01:03:56,440 --> 01:03:58,600
Speaker 2: You said that earlier in the interview, you talked about

1101
01:03:58,640 --> 01:04:03,040
Speaker 2: how you desire our marriage. Let me ask you this

1102
01:04:03,120 --> 01:04:06,040
Speaker 2: from a dating age range, because you said you don't

1103
01:04:06,040 --> 01:04:07,200
Speaker 2: want to have kids anymore.

1104
01:04:09,000 --> 01:04:11,640
Speaker 3: Actually, medically you can't have kids anymore. Snip, snip.

1105
01:04:11,960 --> 01:04:13,800
Speaker 1: And so when you look at I'm not getting reversed

1106
01:04:13,880 --> 01:04:15,880
Speaker 1: and you're not getting to reverse you said absolutely not.

1107
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:18,480
Speaker 3: Let me ask you this.

1108
01:04:18,520 --> 01:04:20,720
Speaker 2: For those who then watch the show, why not why

1109
01:04:20,800 --> 01:04:22,080
Speaker 2: you say you don't want to have kids anymore?

1110
01:04:23,000 --> 01:04:27,560
Speaker 1: Well, at first, I you know, they have to understand

1111
01:04:27,600 --> 01:04:31,640
Speaker 1: that I got divorced into me like that was my

1112
01:04:31,800 --> 01:04:37,400
Speaker 1: biggest loss in life, not from a standpoint of you know,

1113
01:04:37,880 --> 01:04:40,800
Speaker 1: you you know stuff life happens to everybody, but just

1114
01:04:40,840 --> 01:04:43,880
Speaker 1: because I had achieved everything that people said I would

1115
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:46,400
Speaker 1: never achieve, and then I finally get a chance to

1116
01:04:46,560 --> 01:04:50,120
Speaker 1: operate in the space of marriage where I have my

1117
01:04:50,160 --> 01:04:52,480
Speaker 1: both of my sons in marriage in wedlock. I was

1118
01:04:52,480 --> 01:04:59,080
Speaker 1: born out of wedlock, out of love. And you know, again,

1119
01:04:59,200 --> 01:05:02,720
Speaker 1: I went through problem the greatest point of depression during

1120
01:05:02,720 --> 01:05:05,800
Speaker 1: this not only the process of divorce, but even afterwards

1121
01:05:05,840 --> 01:05:09,680
Speaker 1: of trying to find myself, and I had made a

1122
01:05:09,720 --> 01:05:12,440
Speaker 1: decision that, you know what, maybe marriage is not for me,

1123
01:05:12,760 --> 01:05:16,000
Speaker 1: which I think that if men or women are honest

1124
01:05:16,040 --> 01:05:18,240
Speaker 1: with themselves, they probably come to that too.

1125
01:05:20,120 --> 01:05:21,560
Speaker 3: You're talking after coming through a divorce.

1126
01:05:21,640 --> 01:05:23,680
Speaker 1: After going through a divorce, probably like, you know what,

1127
01:05:23,760 --> 01:05:27,680
Speaker 1: I'll never do this again anyway, So like your divorce,

1128
01:05:29,240 --> 01:05:32,080
Speaker 1: I mean, there was some infidelity. But I think also

1129
01:05:32,160 --> 01:05:39,640
Speaker 1: too is we got married pretty young and quick, and

1130
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:48,360
Speaker 1: we didn't really build a friendship, so everything was in

1131
01:05:48,400 --> 01:05:50,640
Speaker 1: the confines of a husband and wife when neither one

1132
01:05:50,640 --> 01:05:52,640
Speaker 1: of us saw a husband and wife as kids.

1133
01:05:52,520 --> 01:05:56,920
Speaker 3: Stop real quick friendship. WI is friendship important.

1134
01:05:57,440 --> 01:06:02,560
Speaker 1: Because you know, when when you don't necessarily feel like

1135
01:06:02,600 --> 01:06:04,760
Speaker 1: a husband that day, or you don't necessarily feel like

1136
01:06:04,800 --> 01:06:08,120
Speaker 1: a wife the other day. You know, that's still my friend.

1137
01:06:08,960 --> 01:06:15,000
Speaker 1: And I think sometimes people don't realize that, like, you're

1138
01:06:15,080 --> 01:06:20,480
Speaker 1: still two human beings. And the experience of a spouse

1139
01:06:20,800 --> 01:06:24,000
Speaker 1: having a spouse is you know, you're under this covenant

1140
01:06:24,000 --> 01:06:27,840
Speaker 1: of God, but that doesn't exclude you from being human

1141
01:06:29,160 --> 01:06:33,080
Speaker 1: and so you'll have some days. Well man, this joke

1142
01:06:33,080 --> 01:06:36,320
Speaker 1: is getting on my nerves, But that's my best friend.

1143
01:06:36,400 --> 01:06:39,960
Speaker 1: So part, and they know you, you know, they know

1144
01:06:40,080 --> 01:06:45,240
Speaker 1: you in ways that other people don't know you, and

1145
01:06:45,280 --> 01:06:51,479
Speaker 1: they accept you as you are, knowing that they don't

1146
01:06:51,480 --> 01:06:54,960
Speaker 1: look at it as a blemish on who you are

1147
01:06:55,000 --> 01:06:59,439
Speaker 1: as a person. That part, because nobody, and I mean

1148
01:07:00,280 --> 01:07:06,480
Speaker 1: no body is perfect. And so making the decision to

1149
01:07:06,480 --> 01:07:09,200
Speaker 1: have a vasectomy was more so because at that time

1150
01:07:09,240 --> 01:07:11,480
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm never having any more kids anymore

1151
01:07:11,520 --> 01:07:14,040
Speaker 1: because I don't want to have kids outside of wedlock.

1152
01:07:14,440 --> 01:07:17,760
Speaker 1: I broke the generational curse in my family in every

1153
01:07:17,880 --> 01:07:22,000
Speaker 1: single way possible. First one to graduate from high school, first,

1154
01:07:22,040 --> 01:07:24,880
Speaker 1: one to graduate from college, first, one to be a homeowner, first,

1155
01:07:24,880 --> 01:07:27,480
Speaker 1: one to be married, first, one to have children in marriage.

1156
01:07:27,520 --> 01:07:32,160
Speaker 1: Like I set this table and then this table gets

1157
01:07:32,160 --> 01:07:37,200
Speaker 1: flipped over so I can set the table back up,

1158
01:07:38,200 --> 01:07:42,560
Speaker 1: but this time around, I might not have this type

1159
01:07:42,600 --> 01:07:47,280
Speaker 1: of flower arrangement or whatever, Like, I can set this

1160
01:07:47,400 --> 01:07:53,760
Speaker 1: table a different way, right, And I help thousands of kids.

1161
01:07:54,160 --> 01:07:58,040
Speaker 1: Every year I helped thousands of families. I run the

1162
01:07:58,120 --> 01:08:00,920
Speaker 1: largest back to school bash in the entire world. Yeah

1163
01:08:01,040 --> 01:08:04,800
Speaker 1: heard at Raymond James State at a football stadium. Thirty

1164
01:08:04,840 --> 01:08:09,640
Speaker 1: thousand backpacks with school supplies, thirty thirty thousand eye eyeglass.

1165
01:08:09,720 --> 01:08:13,160
Speaker 1: Kids get going for an eye examined. Ten minutes later

1166
01:08:13,160 --> 01:08:15,280
Speaker 1: they get a brand new pair of eyeglasses. Really that

1167
01:08:15,320 --> 01:08:21,840
Speaker 1: they on the spot, dental screenings, cleanings, extractions. This year

1168
01:08:21,840 --> 01:08:24,559
Speaker 1: we expanded it to the adults because I recognized that

1169
01:08:25,040 --> 01:08:27,639
Speaker 1: there were so many adults that were just barely getting

1170
01:08:27,640 --> 01:08:30,400
Speaker 1: in there with their kids, and they had health complications.

1171
01:08:30,400 --> 01:08:33,439
Speaker 1: And as you know, healthcare is not always accessible and

1172
01:08:33,479 --> 01:08:36,479
Speaker 1: it's very it's not affordable. So I have all my

1173
01:08:37,520 --> 01:08:41,800
Speaker 1: you know, uh, hospital partners and medical partners come in.

1174
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:44,800
Speaker 1: We had over two hundred dentists there. We had a

1175
01:08:44,880 --> 01:08:46,760
Speaker 1: I mean, if you see it, me telling you about

1176
01:08:46,800 --> 01:08:48,600
Speaker 1: it is one thing, You seeing it is another. We

1177
01:08:48,640 --> 01:08:51,040
Speaker 1: got a whole food activation out in the field. We

1178
01:08:51,120 --> 01:08:55,880
Speaker 1: got bounce houses, all love the free all free, and

1179
01:08:55,920 --> 01:08:59,200
Speaker 1: this is the eighth year that we did it. Congratulation man. Yeah,

1180
01:08:59,360 --> 01:09:02,559
Speaker 1: we had thirty nine thousand families during the holiday season

1181
01:09:02,880 --> 01:09:07,840
Speaker 1: from Thanksgiving to Christmas with food, clothing, toys. I have

1182
01:09:07,960 --> 01:09:10,559
Speaker 1: my own. I have a public school that bears my

1183
01:09:10,640 --> 01:09:13,479
Speaker 1: name on it. Yeah, I saw that. You let me

1184
01:09:13,560 --> 01:09:16,240
Speaker 1: ask you, this does the homeless guy? Since you won't

1185
01:09:16,240 --> 01:09:16,960
Speaker 1: to say his name.

1186
01:09:17,360 --> 01:09:18,400
Speaker 3: He's not living anymore.

1187
01:09:19,840 --> 01:09:21,160
Speaker 2: I say, do you get a chance to see this

1188
01:09:21,320 --> 01:09:22,280
Speaker 2: back to school stuff?

1189
01:09:22,600 --> 01:09:24,720
Speaker 1: No, he passed away. He did get a chance to

1190
01:09:24,720 --> 01:09:27,240
Speaker 1: see me walk across the college graduation stage.

1191
01:09:28,439 --> 01:09:30,600
Speaker 2: Do you know how it would blow his mind to

1192
01:09:30,640 --> 01:09:32,720
Speaker 2: see this thirty thousand.

1193
01:09:32,479 --> 01:09:36,519
Speaker 1: He's seeing it. Oh, yep, he sees it. He's up

1194
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:41,400
Speaker 1: there with my grandma looking down and Patrick Monou.

1195
01:09:41,160 --> 01:09:43,360
Speaker 3: Too, he said, had nothing to do with football.

1196
01:09:43,720 --> 01:09:49,920
Speaker 1: Nothing. I've impacted more people outside of the platform of

1197
01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:53,040
Speaker 1: football than I ever would have imagined. I've gone more places.

1198
01:09:53,040 --> 01:09:56,960
Speaker 1: There's nowhere in this world that I have not gone, Like,

1199
01:09:57,160 --> 01:09:59,840
Speaker 1: no continent that I haven't touched, not one state that

1200
01:09:59,880 --> 01:10:01,160
Speaker 1: I haven't gone to, not.

1201
01:10:01,040 --> 01:10:05,360
Speaker 3: World War one, World world wonder that I have not seen.

1202
01:10:05,760 --> 01:10:07,080
Speaker 3: But is that also with wrestling?

1203
01:10:07,360 --> 01:10:13,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, wrestling everywhere yeah, literally everywhere. Places I never I

1204
01:10:13,720 --> 01:10:16,719
Speaker 1: never would have thought I was going to Saudi Arabia.

1205
01:10:17,840 --> 01:10:20,240
Speaker 1: Been there several times, and like everything you see on

1206
01:10:20,280 --> 01:10:25,760
Speaker 1: the news, it's a lie. You go to China, you

1207
01:10:25,800 --> 01:10:29,240
Speaker 1: go to Japan. Japan is the cleanest place you'll ever heard. Yeah,

1208
01:10:29,680 --> 01:10:32,960
Speaker 1: best food, but it's they have the most respectful culture

1209
01:10:33,000 --> 01:10:34,040
Speaker 1: you've ever come across.

1210
01:10:34,160 --> 01:10:38,240
Speaker 3: They don't play, you know, So did you see yourself?

1211
01:10:39,080 --> 01:10:43,160
Speaker 2: We'll go touch on wrestling, because I didn't realize WWE

1212
01:10:43,479 --> 01:10:45,720
Speaker 2: was so huge. I know, I grew up with it,

1213
01:10:45,760 --> 01:10:49,320
Speaker 2: with the Von Erics and and Huck Hogan and all that.

1214
01:10:49,479 --> 01:10:51,719
Speaker 2: Like as a kid, I was just like, oh my god,

1215
01:10:51,840 --> 01:10:53,880
Speaker 2: I was just you know, but we were post so

1216
01:10:54,080 --> 01:10:56,360
Speaker 2: we were never gonna get to go to we were

1217
01:10:56,400 --> 01:10:58,640
Speaker 2: never going to have to see that in person, a

1218
01:10:58,720 --> 01:11:01,720
Speaker 2: live event. But when you see that, when you've known.

1219
01:11:01,760 --> 01:11:03,599
Speaker 2: First of all, I asked you that you grow up watching.

1220
01:11:03,400 --> 01:11:03,920
Speaker 3: That as a kid.

1221
01:11:03,960 --> 01:11:06,559
Speaker 1: I grew up watching it every Monday. My mom used

1222
01:11:06,560 --> 01:11:10,160
Speaker 1: to fight with my grandmother about allowing me to watch

1223
01:11:10,200 --> 01:11:12,439
Speaker 1: wrestling on a Monday night. Do you remember Van Erks

1224
01:11:12,439 --> 01:11:15,679
Speaker 1: and all this stuff? Yes, yeah, they were so popular

1225
01:11:15,720 --> 01:11:19,679
Speaker 1: because they were from Texas. Yeah, but they're royalty in wrestling,

1226
01:11:19,720 --> 01:11:22,639
Speaker 1: you know. And there's server families that are royalty in wrestling,

1227
01:11:22,680 --> 01:11:25,320
Speaker 1: and the Van Erks was definitely one of those families.

1228
01:11:25,360 --> 01:11:26,040
Speaker 3: So what did it think?

1229
01:11:26,080 --> 01:11:28,320
Speaker 2: What did you think watching that as a kid and

1230
01:11:28,400 --> 01:11:31,599
Speaker 2: now being able to participate in that as an adult.

1231
01:11:31,840 --> 01:11:35,479
Speaker 1: I tell people all the time, it was we talk

1232
01:11:35,520 --> 01:11:38,280
Speaker 1: about numbers and two's and stuff like that. Like for me,

1233
01:11:38,720 --> 01:11:45,559
Speaker 1: it was two weeks after I got divorced, and then

1234
01:11:45,600 --> 01:11:47,679
Speaker 1: two weeks after that, I got denied a high school

1235
01:11:47,720 --> 01:11:53,000
Speaker 1: football coaching job, which is what we all thought that

1236
01:11:53,040 --> 01:11:54,479
Speaker 1: I was going to do. I was going to coach.

1237
01:11:54,520 --> 01:11:59,720
Speaker 1: I wanted to coach. And you know, I always say this,

1238
01:11:59,760 --> 01:12:02,280
Speaker 1: and I said in a public setting as well, Richard Shanty,

1239
01:12:02,400 --> 01:12:05,680
Speaker 1: who was an athletic director at Chamberlain High School, I

1240
01:12:05,720 --> 01:12:08,640
Speaker 1: thank you so much because you made me a millionaire

1241
01:12:08,680 --> 01:12:10,519
Speaker 1: by not giving me the opportunity to be the high

1242
01:12:10,520 --> 01:12:12,720
Speaker 1: school football coach at Chamberlain High School. But here it

1243
01:12:12,760 --> 01:12:15,559
Speaker 1: is now I'm getting ready to do some things at

1244
01:12:15,600 --> 01:12:19,719
Speaker 1: Chamberlain High School. Yeah, and full circle, full circle moment.

1245
01:12:19,840 --> 01:12:24,840
Speaker 1: And so Dave Bautista, you know, is one of my

1246
01:12:24,880 --> 01:12:26,920
Speaker 1: best friends, and he used to talk to me about

1247
01:12:26,920 --> 01:12:28,840
Speaker 1: wrestling and this and that, and he's like, yeah, if

1248
01:12:28,840 --> 01:12:30,920
Speaker 1: you get a chance, you should try it out. It's like, man,

1249
01:12:30,920 --> 01:12:32,800
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that. You know, I watched it growing up,

1250
01:12:32,800 --> 01:12:35,559
Speaker 1: but it's fake. And it's just like, first off, it's

1251
01:12:35,600 --> 01:12:41,800
Speaker 1: not fake. You know, it's predetermined. So if I pick

1252
01:12:41,840 --> 01:12:44,120
Speaker 1: you up in our body, slam you on this ground,

1253
01:12:44,240 --> 01:12:44,920
Speaker 1: you don't feel it.

1254
01:12:44,960 --> 01:12:47,479
Speaker 3: If I hit you with this chair, you're gonna feel it.

1255
01:12:48,120 --> 01:12:50,559
Speaker 1: Uh. And I was driving one day in South Tampa.

1256
01:12:50,600 --> 01:12:52,920
Speaker 1: I had a taste for some jerk chicken. I always

1257
01:12:52,920 --> 01:12:56,360
Speaker 1: tell people that food is like what leads me to

1258
01:12:56,439 --> 01:12:58,360
Speaker 1: all these great things I have, and like, you know,

1259
01:12:59,000 --> 01:13:02,719
Speaker 1: and so I had I had to chase for jerk chicken.

1260
01:13:02,760 --> 01:13:06,280
Speaker 1: There's a place called the Jerk Cut in Tampa. And

1261
01:13:06,680 --> 01:13:08,759
Speaker 1: so I was picking up a pair of dress shoes

1262
01:13:08,760 --> 01:13:11,479
Speaker 1: and I just got resold and I was driving and

1263
01:13:11,640 --> 01:13:14,920
Speaker 1: David told me about FCW, which was the place that

1264
01:13:15,160 --> 01:13:18,600
Speaker 1: you know, which is now called NXT, but it was

1265
01:13:18,640 --> 01:13:22,080
Speaker 1: our developmental system, the black and Yellow building. And so

1266
01:13:22,120 --> 01:13:23,600
Speaker 1: I pick up the phone and I'm like, Dave, is

1267
01:13:23,640 --> 01:13:24,960
Speaker 1: this a place you've been trying to get me to

1268
01:13:25,000 --> 01:13:27,479
Speaker 1: come to? And he was like, yeah, you know, I

1269
01:13:27,560 --> 01:13:29,679
Speaker 1: was like, he's like, asked for Dusty roys of Steve

1270
01:13:29,760 --> 01:13:32,240
Speaker 1: Kerr and I was like, that's like a Tommy elbow

1271
01:13:33,040 --> 01:13:33,840
Speaker 1: dust time.

1272
01:13:33,920 --> 01:13:35,719
Speaker 3: You just popped up on the place. Yeah.

1273
01:13:35,760 --> 01:13:39,160
Speaker 1: So I go to the back of the building that

1274
01:13:39,200 --> 01:13:42,120
Speaker 1: the signs clearly says f C W and w w

1275
01:13:42,320 --> 01:13:45,360
Speaker 1: E Talent and Employees only. You say, I'm gonna show

1276
01:13:45,400 --> 01:13:47,519
Speaker 1: up anyway, it's bussed up in the mother just walked

1277
01:13:47,520 --> 01:13:50,479
Speaker 1: in there and it was some guys working out in

1278
01:13:50,520 --> 01:13:54,280
Speaker 1: the ring and Norman Smiley was in the ring and

1279
01:13:54,320 --> 01:13:56,200
Speaker 1: he looked down. He's like, can I Can I help you?

1280
01:13:56,520 --> 01:13:58,960
Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, I was looking to talk

1281
01:13:59,000 --> 01:14:02,080
Speaker 1: to Dusty or Steve Kerran about possibly taking a look

1282
01:14:02,120 --> 01:14:03,880
Speaker 1: at this, and he's like, well, neither one of them

1283
01:14:03,920 --> 01:14:05,720
Speaker 1: are here right now, but we have a TV show.

1284
01:14:05,720 --> 01:14:08,040
Speaker 1: I'm sure they want to talk to you later on

1285
01:14:08,080 --> 01:14:10,360
Speaker 1: the night if you want to come back. So I

1286
01:14:10,400 --> 01:14:12,680
Speaker 1: went and picked up my sons, who were three and

1287
01:14:12,760 --> 01:14:15,280
Speaker 1: five at the time. I said, hey, y'all want to

1288
01:14:15,320 --> 01:14:17,800
Speaker 1: go to a wrestling match. He's like his uncle Dave

1289
01:14:17,960 --> 01:14:20,280
Speaker 1: wrestling and I was like, no, this is where he

1290
01:14:20,280 --> 01:14:22,639
Speaker 1: would go like before he started got on the big

1291
01:14:22,680 --> 01:14:27,599
Speaker 1: stage of WWE oh wow, and we went we watched

1292
01:14:27,600 --> 01:14:29,880
Speaker 1: the show. I looked over and I was like, you

1293
01:14:29,920 --> 01:14:32,600
Speaker 1: think Dad can do this? TJ was like, Dad, you

1294
01:14:32,600 --> 01:14:36,599
Speaker 1: can do anything. And then I looked over at Titus

1295
01:14:36,600 --> 01:14:38,760
Speaker 1: and I was like, you think you want Daddy to

1296
01:14:38,760 --> 01:14:41,960
Speaker 1: do this? And he shook his head. So I had

1297
01:14:42,000 --> 01:14:46,320
Speaker 1: a fifteen minute conversation with Steve Kerr and Dusty. Afterwards,

1298
01:14:46,360 --> 01:14:49,960
Speaker 1: I'm driving home and John learn Knight has calls me

1299
01:14:50,000 --> 01:14:51,880
Speaker 1: and says, hey, you know, I just got off the

1300
01:14:51,880 --> 01:14:55,280
Speaker 1: phone with Steve and Dusty. What kind of shape are

1301
01:14:55,320 --> 01:14:57,439
Speaker 1: you in. I was like, well, I've never wrestled a

1302
01:14:57,520 --> 01:15:00,240
Speaker 1: day in my life. I work out. But He's like, well,

1303
01:15:00,439 --> 01:15:03,360
Speaker 1: you know, we want to give you a tryout, you know,

1304
01:15:03,439 --> 01:15:05,760
Speaker 1: to be three days, see if we like you, see

1305
01:15:05,800 --> 01:15:08,080
Speaker 1: if you like it, you know, and kind of go

1306
01:15:08,160 --> 01:15:10,839
Speaker 1: from there. We'll pay your X amount per day for tryout.

1307
01:15:10,920 --> 01:15:13,920
Speaker 1: At this time, I had just got divorced. I just

1308
01:15:13,960 --> 01:15:17,840
Speaker 1: got denied a high school football coaching job. So and

1309
01:15:18,040 --> 01:15:20,080
Speaker 1: I was actually getting ready to try to go back

1310
01:15:20,080 --> 01:15:23,800
Speaker 1: to Florida to coach defensive be assistant defensive line coach.

1311
01:15:24,680 --> 01:15:27,360
Speaker 1: So I was due to go back that Monday to

1312
01:15:27,479 --> 01:15:31,680
Speaker 1: talk with the head coach. Did that look promising? Oh,

1313
01:15:31,680 --> 01:15:37,080
Speaker 1: it's very promising, but it still wasn't a guarantee. And meanwhile,

1314
01:15:37,280 --> 01:15:40,439
Speaker 1: I got two sons and child support and all these

1315
01:15:40,479 --> 01:15:44,559
Speaker 1: things that I and so I go that. I went

1316
01:15:44,720 --> 01:15:46,839
Speaker 1: to the show that Thursday. I came in that Friday.

1317
01:15:46,880 --> 01:15:48,920
Speaker 1: I worked out is the hardest thing I've ever done

1318
01:15:48,920 --> 01:15:54,200
Speaker 1: in my life. Like it's it's hard. And I'm driving

1319
01:15:54,240 --> 01:15:58,240
Speaker 1: back home and John Carsey said, all right, kid, we

1320
01:15:58,320 --> 01:16:00,640
Speaker 1: think we're going to give you a shot. He was

1321
01:16:00,680 --> 01:16:04,920
Speaker 1: like normalists, like so first thing I saw. So I

1322
01:16:04,960 --> 01:16:07,439
Speaker 1: was like, what really? And he was like, yeah, you know,

1323
01:16:07,479 --> 01:16:09,040
Speaker 1: I think we're gonna try to sign you know, you know,

1324
01:16:09,040 --> 01:16:11,200
Speaker 1: a normalist like a six to eight month process to

1325
01:16:11,240 --> 01:16:14,160
Speaker 1: get through everything. And I was like, John, bro I

1326
01:16:14,200 --> 01:16:17,599
Speaker 1: don't have six to eight months this or I'm going

1327
01:16:17,680 --> 01:16:19,800
Speaker 1: to go coach football. And he was like, well, give

1328
01:16:19,840 --> 01:16:21,439
Speaker 1: me an hour or so and i'll call you back.

1329
01:16:22,400 --> 01:16:24,000
Speaker 1: So he called me back and he was like, all right,

1330
01:16:24,040 --> 01:16:27,120
Speaker 1: we got to send you to Pittsburgh and you know

1331
01:16:27,160 --> 01:16:30,400
Speaker 1: you gotta pass a physical first, uh. And so they

1332
01:16:30,439 --> 01:16:34,960
Speaker 1: flew me out to Pittsburgh that Tuesday. I came back

1333
01:16:35,000 --> 01:16:38,080
Speaker 1: that Tuesday night, that Wednesday day, overnight of a contract.

1334
01:16:38,080 --> 01:16:40,800
Speaker 1: I got it Thursday, I sent him back and then

1335
01:16:40,840 --> 01:16:43,400
Speaker 1: the following Monday, two weeks after I walked in that

1336
01:16:43,439 --> 01:16:46,720
Speaker 1: back door. I was learning how to become a ww superstar. Now,

1337
01:16:46,800 --> 01:16:48,880
Speaker 1: I will say this, I was supposed to get paid

1338
01:16:48,920 --> 01:16:52,280
Speaker 1: for three days and I only worked out one and

1339
01:16:52,320 --> 01:16:55,280
Speaker 1: I just got divorced. I'm like, hey, what about the

1340
01:16:55,280 --> 01:16:59,080
Speaker 1: brother two days though, He's like, no, We're gonna pay

1341
01:16:59,120 --> 01:17:01,760
Speaker 1: you for all the I was like, yeah, because I

1342
01:17:01,800 --> 01:17:02,360
Speaker 1: need some coin.

1343
01:17:04,560 --> 01:17:05,240
Speaker 3: So it said.

1344
01:17:05,360 --> 01:17:08,360
Speaker 1: They said normally six to eight months. Yeah, even longer

1345
01:17:08,400 --> 01:17:10,920
Speaker 1: too for some people. And you got in two weeks. Yeah,

1346
01:17:11,000 --> 01:17:12,320
Speaker 1: that's why you said the power too.

1347
01:17:12,479 --> 01:17:15,240
Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, and just.

1348
01:17:15,200 --> 01:17:17,080
Speaker 1: Think if I didn't have a taste for jerk chicken

1349
01:17:17,120 --> 01:17:19,799
Speaker 1: out and my big hungry ass.

1350
01:17:22,400 --> 01:17:24,120
Speaker 3: So when you look back at that, you did that

1351
01:17:24,160 --> 01:17:25,160
Speaker 3: for how many years?

1352
01:17:26,120 --> 01:17:30,720
Speaker 1: I mean, technically, I'm you know, my last match was

1353
01:17:30,760 --> 01:17:33,719
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty. But I was named the global Ambassador

1354
01:17:33,720 --> 01:17:41,120
Speaker 1: of the company, you know, And so yeah, fifteen sixteen years. God,

1355
01:17:41,640 --> 01:17:44,679
Speaker 1: I'm in the Hall of Fame as a Warrior Award

1356
01:17:44,720 --> 01:17:49,240
Speaker 1: recipient DRAVT World. I was named the most philanthropic superstar

1357
01:17:49,720 --> 01:17:53,320
Speaker 1: in WWE history, which to me, is, so.

1358
01:17:53,280 --> 01:17:55,840
Speaker 3: What made you do that? What made you? What made

1359
01:17:55,880 --> 01:17:57,640
Speaker 3: you embrace philanthropy?

1360
01:17:58,520 --> 01:18:02,720
Speaker 1: I've always done it, literally, like what I'm doing, I'm

1361
01:18:02,760 --> 01:18:07,160
Speaker 1: just doing it. I've literally since high school, always giving back,

1362
01:18:07,439 --> 01:18:12,880
Speaker 1: always found ways to to make people's lives better, put

1363
01:18:12,880 --> 01:18:15,600
Speaker 1: smiles on people's faces, as used to say in WWE.

1364
01:18:15,760 --> 01:18:19,680
Speaker 1: And God trusted me with the little so that I

1365
01:18:19,720 --> 01:18:25,400
Speaker 1: can avail into much. Absolutely, and the little I recognize

1366
01:18:25,439 --> 01:18:28,840
Speaker 1: each time, even if it's on a big scale, like

1367
01:18:29,000 --> 01:18:31,559
Speaker 1: it's going to get bigger because I'm going to stay

1368
01:18:31,600 --> 01:18:34,120
Speaker 1: obedient to what He's told me to do. Absolutely, three

1369
01:18:34,200 --> 01:18:37,599
Speaker 1: hundred plus kids we've helped go to college. You know,

1370
01:18:37,880 --> 01:18:39,920
Speaker 1: several of them are playing in the NFL. I get

1371
01:18:39,960 --> 01:18:42,759
Speaker 1: to watch them on Sundays. Many of them are playing

1372
01:18:42,760 --> 01:18:48,240
Speaker 1: on Saturdays. Some of them are lawyers, now doctors, law

1373
01:18:48,320 --> 01:18:52,639
Speaker 1: enforcement officers. Same dude, same dude that was totally it'll

1374
01:18:52,680 --> 01:18:54,400
Speaker 1: be dead in jail by the time when he was sixteen.

1375
01:18:55,640 --> 01:19:03,800
Speaker 1: So my wife has to understand that that where this

1376
01:19:03,800 --> 01:19:09,040
Speaker 1: this constant what seems to be I'm just pushing stuff

1377
01:19:10,120 --> 01:19:14,840
Speaker 1: Like I'm not pushing anything. I'm moving in what God

1378
01:19:14,840 --> 01:19:15,880
Speaker 1: has called me to move in.

1379
01:19:17,160 --> 01:19:19,400
Speaker 2: To me, ask you this when you went on King's Court,

1380
01:19:19,800 --> 01:19:22,280
Speaker 2: where you're going on King's Court genuinely looking for love.

1381
01:19:23,160 --> 01:19:26,840
Speaker 1: I you know, I say this, you know, with all

1382
01:19:26,880 --> 01:19:33,200
Speaker 1: respect to the show. I honestly felt like I'm going

1383
01:19:33,240 --> 01:19:36,880
Speaker 1: into this journey single and I'm coming out single. But

1384
01:19:37,000 --> 01:19:39,759
Speaker 1: it doesn't mean that I'm gonna exclude myself from a connection.

1385
01:19:41,520 --> 01:19:44,320
Speaker 1: So whether I pick a queen or I don't pick

1386
01:19:44,360 --> 01:19:46,680
Speaker 1: a queen, we're still not instantly going to be in

1387
01:19:46,720 --> 01:19:52,680
Speaker 1: a relationship because it's several weeks and I need some

1388
01:19:52,880 --> 01:19:56,759
Speaker 1: time to know that this person is my person because

1389
01:19:56,800 --> 01:20:03,320
Speaker 1: all that see time and harvest, and for some the

1390
01:20:03,360 --> 01:20:07,160
Speaker 1: harvest never comes because they're not willing to put in

1391
01:20:07,240 --> 01:20:09,960
Speaker 1: the scene in the ground that time. Yeah, and so

1392
01:20:10,560 --> 01:20:14,160
Speaker 1: that's been my shortcoming in the past, which is I

1393
01:20:14,200 --> 01:20:16,400
Speaker 1: see something I'm like. You know, we joked, they joked

1394
01:20:16,400 --> 01:20:19,080
Speaker 1: about it on the episode last night, like yeah, he'd

1395
01:20:19,120 --> 01:20:20,360
Speaker 1: be like, oh you like me?

1396
01:20:20,520 --> 01:20:23,000
Speaker 3: I like you? All right, cool, let's go, let's roll,

1397
01:20:23,160 --> 01:20:25,679
Speaker 3: you know. So that's how.

1398
01:20:25,520 --> 01:20:28,200
Speaker 2: You was you and the people you're you're hopeful, romantic.

1399
01:20:28,240 --> 01:20:30,720
Speaker 2: You just fall in love real quickly. I wouldn't say

1400
01:20:30,760 --> 01:20:33,360
Speaker 2: I fall in love, you fall in connection. I think

1401
01:20:33,439 --> 01:20:37,960
Speaker 2: I commit no, I don't commit quickly, you said, you said,

1402
01:20:38,240 --> 01:20:41,760
Speaker 2: I like you, you like me. Ask you this because

1403
01:20:41,760 --> 01:20:44,400
Speaker 2: you said, this is something that I want women to hear.

1404
01:20:44,880 --> 01:20:47,439
Speaker 2: I asked you early in the interview about how is

1405
01:20:47,439 --> 01:20:49,840
Speaker 2: your dating life like in you know, in college and

1406
01:20:49,840 --> 01:20:52,120
Speaker 2: growing up whatever. You said, Well, I was, you know,

1407
01:20:52,360 --> 01:20:55,040
Speaker 2: I didn't come into my own I wasn't the most

1408
01:20:55,040 --> 01:20:56,400
Speaker 2: attractive growing up or whatever.

1409
01:20:57,200 --> 01:21:00,880
Speaker 3: All now, yeah, I know, I know I am not.

1410
01:21:01,560 --> 01:21:02,479
Speaker 3: You know you are now.

1411
01:21:02,920 --> 01:21:05,759
Speaker 2: And then you said, but then you alluded to almost

1412
01:21:05,840 --> 01:21:08,040
Speaker 2: like you was a guy that didn't have a girlfriends,

1413
01:21:08,080 --> 01:21:10,240
Speaker 2: that didn't have that. Then we started unpacking. I was like,

1414
01:21:10,280 --> 01:21:12,200
Speaker 2: so you wouldn't pass nobody holding a hold on.

1415
01:21:12,200 --> 01:21:12,400
Speaker 4: Now I.

1416
01:21:15,520 --> 01:21:19,000
Speaker 3: Have my first share of entanglements. So this real quick.

1417
01:21:19,160 --> 01:21:21,360
Speaker 2: So when you look at that, when you said, no,

1418
01:21:21,479 --> 01:21:23,800
Speaker 2: I didn't have a lot of girlfriends, but I did

1419
01:21:23,840 --> 01:21:26,640
Speaker 2: have sexual partners. But then you also said that you

1420
01:21:26,760 --> 01:21:30,519
Speaker 2: wasn't the type of guy that felt confident from the

1421
01:21:30,560 --> 01:21:31,360
Speaker 2: looks department.

1422
01:21:31,520 --> 01:21:34,760
Speaker 1: It didn't stop you from getting no women. No, but

1423
01:21:34,840 --> 01:21:38,040
Speaker 1: it didn't stop me. It didn't preclude me from it

1424
01:21:38,080 --> 01:21:40,960
Speaker 1: didn't get me women that I actually.

1425
01:21:40,760 --> 01:21:43,439
Speaker 3: Would be good for me in the long run.

1426
01:21:43,800 --> 01:21:47,559
Speaker 1: Explain I think we can find a sexual partner anywhere,

1427
01:21:48,560 --> 01:21:51,479
Speaker 1: men or women. You can find somebody to have sex

1428
01:21:51,520 --> 01:21:54,600
Speaker 1: with you anywhere, even if some people feel like they

1429
01:21:54,680 --> 01:21:56,840
Speaker 1: got to pay him. It's possible for you to have

1430
01:21:56,920 --> 01:22:02,400
Speaker 1: sex with literally anybody, anybody. Yeah, to find somebody that

1431
01:22:02,520 --> 01:22:11,439
Speaker 1: actually values you and values themselves to the point where

1432
01:22:13,240 --> 01:22:16,120
Speaker 1: sex is not the indicator of whether or not we

1433
01:22:16,160 --> 01:22:23,160
Speaker 1: continue our relationship. That will allow me to see the

1434
01:22:23,240 --> 01:22:29,679
Speaker 1: fact that this woman actually sees me in a way

1435
01:22:29,720 --> 01:22:33,160
Speaker 1: in which other people. I mean, I jokingly said it

1436
01:22:33,200 --> 01:22:35,559
Speaker 1: on the episode. I was like, yeah, objectify me, you know,

1437
01:22:35,640 --> 01:22:37,479
Speaker 1: because she's like, well, you've seen them with the shirt off.

1438
01:22:37,960 --> 01:22:42,920
Speaker 1: Objectify me, you know. But it's not. I'm so much

1439
01:22:42,960 --> 01:22:46,920
Speaker 1: more than this shell that I'm in.

1440
01:22:47,160 --> 01:22:47,360
Speaker 4: You know.

1441
01:22:49,120 --> 01:22:50,280
Speaker 3: When did that come about?

1442
01:22:50,800 --> 01:22:53,679
Speaker 2: When did you come to the realization that you value

1443
01:22:53,760 --> 01:22:56,439
Speaker 2: yourself more than just what you can do? You know,

1444
01:22:56,520 --> 01:22:58,639
Speaker 2: and I'll say, back in slavery, all they used us

1445
01:22:58,640 --> 01:23:01,800
Speaker 2: for is to pro create, And we've been in a

1446
01:23:01,920 --> 01:23:04,640
Speaker 2: dated with that ideology, especially as black men that just

1447
01:23:04,680 --> 01:23:07,600
Speaker 2: have sex with women, no emotions whatever. When did you

1448
01:23:07,640 --> 01:23:11,360
Speaker 2: come into this evolved man, this comprehensive man that says,

1449
01:23:11,400 --> 01:23:12,840
Speaker 2: you know what I want you to see me for

1450
01:23:12,920 --> 01:23:14,800
Speaker 2: the value of what I have to offer. I want

1451
01:23:14,880 --> 01:23:17,280
Speaker 2: you to see me for the contents of my character.

1452
01:23:17,439 --> 01:23:19,880
Speaker 2: When did that shift? At what age?

1453
01:23:24,680 --> 01:23:28,200
Speaker 1: Honestly probably around thirty five. What happened at thirty five?

1454
01:23:29,080 --> 01:23:29,200
Speaker 2: Uh?

1455
01:23:30,040 --> 01:23:33,320
Speaker 1: You know, I just started like kind of getting some

1456
01:23:33,320 --> 01:23:36,960
Speaker 1: footing in WWE. I'm traveling all the time, and when

1457
01:23:36,960 --> 01:23:38,800
Speaker 1: you're on the road a lot, like you don't really

1458
01:23:38,840 --> 01:23:43,840
Speaker 1: have chances to really foster relationship. I know, and you know,

1459
01:23:45,160 --> 01:23:48,559
Speaker 1: but I always knew that, Like I wanted to be

1460
01:23:48,760 --> 01:23:49,800
Speaker 1: a really good dad.

1461
01:23:51,600 --> 01:23:53,600
Speaker 3: And so were you married in the time, are you

1462
01:23:53,680 --> 01:23:54,160
Speaker 3: about to get it?

1463
01:23:54,240 --> 01:23:58,559
Speaker 1: I was not, okay, divorced, And you know, I started

1464
01:23:58,600 --> 01:24:06,040
Speaker 1: wrestling when I was thirty three years old. And but again,

1465
01:24:06,600 --> 01:24:11,360
Speaker 1: you know, I think being a father kind of it

1466
01:24:11,720 --> 01:24:15,400
Speaker 1: literally saved my life because I had so much of

1467
01:24:15,439 --> 01:24:19,160
Speaker 1: a perspective of like, I don't want to be involved

1468
01:24:19,200 --> 01:24:24,960
Speaker 1: with the wrong person that brings shame to my kids.

1469
01:24:25,000 --> 01:24:29,200
Speaker 1: Like I tell my kids all the time, like, don't

1470
01:24:29,200 --> 01:24:30,400
Speaker 1: be out there embarrassing us.

1471
01:24:31,240 --> 01:24:31,479
Speaker 3: You know.

1472
01:24:32,240 --> 01:24:35,559
Speaker 1: So the likelihood of you seeing me get a DUI

1473
01:24:35,800 --> 01:24:38,720
Speaker 1: is one thousand percent not going to happen, right, The

1474
01:24:38,840 --> 01:24:41,960
Speaker 1: likelihood of you seen me in a domestic violence situation,

1475
01:24:42,760 --> 01:24:46,160
Speaker 1: one thousand percent not going to happen. The likelihood of

1476
01:24:46,160 --> 01:24:50,080
Speaker 1: you hearing about me slapping the hell out of somebody

1477
01:24:50,120 --> 01:24:52,880
Speaker 1: that was doing something crazy, I give it out about

1478
01:24:52,880 --> 01:24:57,599
Speaker 1: a fifty percent. But I got to be pushed there

1479
01:24:58,880 --> 01:25:04,760
Speaker 1: because I always tell me much kids like well, for

1480
01:25:04,880 --> 01:25:07,360
Speaker 1: me raising my children, they were never afraid of, like

1481
01:25:07,400 --> 01:25:10,280
Speaker 1: getting a whooping like people would think, Oh, man, I

1482
01:25:10,280 --> 01:25:13,200
Speaker 1: don't want to piss him off here. It's like I

1483
01:25:13,240 --> 01:25:16,839
Speaker 1: spank my kids here and there, but not really because

1484
01:25:16,920 --> 01:25:19,000
Speaker 1: I got whooped all the time as a kid, and

1485
01:25:19,000 --> 01:25:20,000
Speaker 1: then you get immune to it.

1486
01:25:20,240 --> 01:25:24,479
Speaker 3: Yeah, keep it up. I'm whooping behind all right, you know.

1487
01:25:24,760 --> 01:25:32,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, I I never wanted My kids are more afraid

1488
01:25:32,439 --> 01:25:35,960
Speaker 1: of disappointing me than they are ever getting a whooping.

1489
01:25:37,040 --> 01:25:41,680
Speaker 1: And that is the same for me. So in this

1490
01:25:41,840 --> 01:25:45,080
Speaker 1: stage of life, my kids really just want their dad

1491
01:25:45,080 --> 01:25:45,679
Speaker 1: to be happy.

1492
01:25:46,160 --> 01:25:47,760
Speaker 3: Good. I want to go back to this.

1493
01:25:47,880 --> 01:25:51,880
Speaker 2: You said you found your value as a man even

1494
01:25:52,080 --> 01:25:55,799
Speaker 2: after marriage, So that means you said vows are somebody

1495
01:25:55,960 --> 01:25:59,519
Speaker 2: same as I did. Took vows not realizing your value

1496
01:25:59,560 --> 01:26:02,760
Speaker 2: as a man, and then after your mayorage is when

1497
01:26:02,760 --> 01:26:05,040
Speaker 2: you came to the knowledge of you know, what I

1498
01:26:05,080 --> 01:26:08,200
Speaker 2: want to be more than just this external body. I

1499
01:26:08,240 --> 01:26:11,439
Speaker 2: want to I want somebody to love me. And first

1500
01:26:11,439 --> 01:26:13,760
Speaker 2: of all, I love myself for who I really am

1501
01:26:13,840 --> 01:26:15,720
Speaker 2: and my purpose that God has called me to be.

1502
01:26:17,000 --> 01:26:20,360
Speaker 2: You are traveling a road. We can only imagine what

1503
01:26:20,520 --> 01:26:23,240
Speaker 2: was offered on the road, and so you get in

1504
01:26:23,360 --> 01:26:28,320
Speaker 2: the dated desensitized by women's bodies all across the world.

1505
01:26:28,479 --> 01:26:33,920
Speaker 1: I don't get these these sensitize women. Yeah, but the

1506
01:26:33,920 --> 01:26:37,719
Speaker 1: the I always tell people there's a difference between options

1507
01:26:37,720 --> 01:26:42,680
Speaker 1: and choices breaking down, Well, there are options everywhere, but

1508
01:26:42,760 --> 01:26:45,040
Speaker 1: it's dependent on you know, you have to choose at

1509
01:26:45,120 --> 01:26:48,360
Speaker 1: some point. And so I chose a lot less than

1510
01:26:48,360 --> 01:26:51,200
Speaker 1: the options that I had available to me. And I

1511
01:26:51,280 --> 01:26:54,599
Speaker 1: chose a lot less not necessarily based on my coming

1512
01:26:54,640 --> 01:26:57,280
Speaker 1: to this space where I'm just this great man and

1513
01:26:57,320 --> 01:26:59,880
Speaker 1: I shouldn't I should have this type of woman and

1514
01:27:00,120 --> 01:27:03,800
Speaker 1: all this and that it was really like this is

1515
01:27:03,840 --> 01:27:07,840
Speaker 1: not going to last a long time, and I don't

1516
01:27:07,880 --> 01:27:11,280
Speaker 1: have a lot of time to waste. And if somebody

1517
01:27:11,320 --> 01:27:14,080
Speaker 1: don't understand that time is the greatest asset to me

1518
01:27:14,160 --> 01:27:16,880
Speaker 1: that I can never buy anymore of. I can't replace it.

1519
01:27:16,920 --> 01:27:20,080
Speaker 1: I can like I don't want to waste my time

1520
01:27:21,520 --> 01:27:24,800
Speaker 1: being in spaces and being with people that don't understand me.

1521
01:27:25,760 --> 01:27:30,519
Speaker 1: You understand the illusion of me, You understand all right.

1522
01:27:30,520 --> 01:27:34,320
Speaker 1: He gotta be sixfold two eighty And like, I check

1523
01:27:34,400 --> 01:27:37,880
Speaker 1: all these kind of boxes for so many different women, right,

1524
01:27:38,439 --> 01:27:41,280
Speaker 1: But the most important box that I want the woman

1525
01:27:41,360 --> 01:27:44,599
Speaker 1: to check is that this man is a man of God,

1526
01:27:44,880 --> 01:27:47,360
Speaker 1: regardless if he cusses, if he fusses, if he does

1527
01:27:47,640 --> 01:27:51,200
Speaker 1: like I am a man of God, I am also

1528
01:27:52,479 --> 01:27:56,120
Speaker 1: a man who is going to tell you ahead of

1529
01:27:56,160 --> 01:28:02,360
Speaker 1: time it's gonna be a ride. But I look at

1530
01:28:02,360 --> 01:28:05,639
Speaker 1: this illustration like Jesus sat at the table with twelve

1531
01:28:05,680 --> 01:28:08,280
Speaker 1: people that were the worst of the worst and the

1532
01:28:08,320 --> 01:28:11,480
Speaker 1: last Supper, and he chose them as disciples.

1533
01:28:11,600 --> 01:28:11,840
Speaker 3: Yep.

1534
01:28:12,760 --> 01:28:14,720
Speaker 1: So if you go to a deeper meaning of who

1535
01:28:14,760 --> 01:28:21,599
Speaker 1: Thattius is, God from the beginning was in me and

1536
01:28:21,640 --> 01:28:26,080
Speaker 1: for me. My name Thaddeus was one of the chosen

1537
01:28:26,120 --> 01:28:32,760
Speaker 1: twelve disciples. Is My middle name is Michael, one who

1538
01:28:32,800 --> 01:28:37,000
Speaker 1: is like God. My last name is Bullard first four

1539
01:28:37,080 --> 01:28:40,679
Speaker 1: letters of bull. My first four letters of my last

1540
01:28:40,720 --> 01:28:45,559
Speaker 1: name is bull. My sign is a tarist. Ladies, I'm

1541
01:28:45,600 --> 01:28:48,160
Speaker 1: giving you the four to one one right out, of

1542
01:28:48,200 --> 01:28:53,400
Speaker 1: the gate. Why I am hell on wheels at times?

1543
01:28:54,160 --> 01:28:55,919
Speaker 3: You can do it from my name alone.

1544
01:28:58,960 --> 01:29:01,240
Speaker 2: And so when you look at from thirty five on up,

1545
01:29:01,240 --> 01:29:02,679
Speaker 2: have you ever been close to marriage?

1546
01:29:02,880 --> 01:29:09,280
Speaker 1: I have got I got engaged twice and one of

1547
01:29:09,320 --> 01:29:14,080
Speaker 1: those individuals is now my best friend, you know, Lawanda,

1548
01:29:14,840 --> 01:29:21,519
Speaker 1: And you know it didn't work in that space, but

1549
01:29:21,600 --> 01:29:24,760
Speaker 1: she helped me raise my kids and she was a

1550
01:29:24,800 --> 01:29:28,280
Speaker 1: friend to me, you know, much more than she longer

1551
01:29:28,320 --> 01:29:29,920
Speaker 1: than she was even in a relationship with me.

1552
01:29:30,240 --> 01:29:33,559
Speaker 3: How long ago was that with that engagement? Say that again?

1553
01:29:33,600 --> 01:29:35,479
Speaker 3: How long ago was that engagement.

1554
01:29:36,240 --> 01:29:44,240
Speaker 1: Twenty fifteen sixteen is? Yeah, I've known her for eleven years,

1555
01:29:44,560 --> 01:29:46,280
Speaker 1: so for twelve years now.

1556
01:29:47,160 --> 01:29:48,639
Speaker 3: So yeah, And.

1557
01:29:48,560 --> 01:29:52,160
Speaker 2: So you said you desire marriage, and you said that

1558
01:29:52,439 --> 01:29:55,400
Speaker 2: it's a difference between what you want and what you need.

1559
01:29:56,560 --> 01:29:59,839
Speaker 2: How do you distinguish the two and do you typically

1560
01:30:00,120 --> 01:30:03,400
Speaker 2: choose what you need at this juncture of your life

1561
01:30:03,840 --> 01:30:04,960
Speaker 2: versus what you want?

1562
01:30:06,600 --> 01:30:14,280
Speaker 1: I think I'm still figuring that out because nobody's perfect

1563
01:30:14,840 --> 01:30:17,400
Speaker 1: and there's no perfect case scenario. And that's why I

1564
01:30:17,479 --> 01:30:21,200
Speaker 1: always go with this this list of you know, we

1565
01:30:22,120 --> 01:30:23,960
Speaker 1: say we want them to be this, and we want

1566
01:30:23,960 --> 01:30:25,639
Speaker 1: them to be that. And we wanted, well, what about

1567
01:30:25,640 --> 01:30:29,519
Speaker 1: when they're not those things? I have to consciously make

1568
01:30:29,520 --> 01:30:35,000
Speaker 1: a decision that I'm going to love this person regardless

1569
01:30:35,360 --> 01:30:38,559
Speaker 1: of this list. So throw the list out so you

1570
01:30:38,600 --> 01:30:40,720
Speaker 1: have no list in your mind. I don't like, I

1571
01:30:40,840 --> 01:30:44,200
Speaker 1: know what. I don't date, you know. I mean it's

1572
01:30:44,200 --> 01:30:50,200
Speaker 1: pretty evident on the show. I'm not attracted to certain people.

1573
01:30:50,439 --> 01:30:50,680
Speaker 3: You know.

1574
01:30:55,560 --> 01:31:01,799
Speaker 1: So people, yeah, correct way to say it without offending anybody,

1575
01:31:01,880 --> 01:31:09,800
Speaker 1: but it's just I I I think for me, I

1576
01:31:09,840 --> 01:31:14,280
Speaker 1: want to be loved by a black woman, and I

1577
01:31:14,320 --> 01:31:21,560
Speaker 1: want to be loved by a black woman that understands,

1578
01:31:22,680 --> 01:31:28,800
Speaker 1: even if it's their second time around, what marriage really is. Yeah,

1579
01:31:29,160 --> 01:31:36,360
Speaker 1: because my kids, you know, are their mom I love

1580
01:31:36,760 --> 01:31:39,200
Speaker 1: like I love my ex wife. It was a time

1581
01:31:39,200 --> 01:31:43,960
Speaker 1: where she wasn't on my favorite list, but she gave

1582
01:31:43,960 --> 01:31:46,400
Speaker 1: me the opportunity to be a husband. She gave me

1583
01:31:46,439 --> 01:31:50,760
Speaker 1: the opportunity to to be a father, and which is

1584
01:31:50,800 --> 01:31:52,800
Speaker 1: something we both can be proud of with our with

1585
01:31:52,880 --> 01:31:57,240
Speaker 1: our sons. And she also gave me an opportunity to

1586
01:31:57,400 --> 01:32:03,200
Speaker 1: become a better man. Because I can say one hundred

1587
01:32:03,200 --> 01:32:09,280
Speaker 1: percent certainty, there was some times where you know, I

1588
01:32:09,280 --> 01:32:11,280
Speaker 1: don't know that if we were still married, that I

1589
01:32:11,320 --> 01:32:15,680
Speaker 1: would be who I am today, which makes sense. And

1590
01:32:16,120 --> 01:32:19,160
Speaker 1: actually I can say one hundred percent certainty that if

1591
01:32:19,160 --> 01:32:21,240
Speaker 1: we were still married, I would not be who absolutely,

1592
01:32:21,400 --> 01:32:26,360
Speaker 1: and that's not a knock on at all. And so

1593
01:32:26,400 --> 01:32:29,160
Speaker 1: I don't think you have to be enemies, especially if

1594
01:32:29,200 --> 01:32:34,519
Speaker 1: you had children with your ex. I think it's it's

1595
01:32:34,560 --> 01:32:39,800
Speaker 1: actually better for the children if your relationship is at

1596
01:32:39,920 --> 01:32:48,439
Speaker 1: minimum cordial. But I never felt, you know, years ago,

1597
01:32:48,520 --> 01:32:51,200
Speaker 1: I never felt like I would feel where I'm at

1598
01:32:51,200 --> 01:32:55,479
Speaker 1: today in regards to if somebody would ask me, what's

1599
01:32:55,560 --> 01:32:57,960
Speaker 1: what's something you you want to do that you haven't

1600
01:32:58,000 --> 01:33:01,240
Speaker 1: done or that you would do again if you couldn't

1601
01:33:01,240 --> 01:33:04,479
Speaker 1: do it again, if you if you and it's I

1602
01:33:04,520 --> 01:33:07,479
Speaker 1: want to be a husband, I'm going But I don't

1603
01:33:07,520 --> 01:33:09,639
Speaker 1: want to just be like I have to make this

1604
01:33:10,200 --> 01:33:13,320
Speaker 1: like very plain, like I don't want to just be

1605
01:33:13,479 --> 01:33:17,519
Speaker 1: a husband. I want to be a husband to the

1606
01:33:17,560 --> 01:33:21,160
Speaker 1: wife that God has selected for me, and that I

1607
01:33:21,320 --> 01:33:25,840
Speaker 1: say I'm your husband, not somebody that says God told

1608
01:33:25,840 --> 01:33:28,080
Speaker 1: me you was my husband. God gonna tell the whole

1609
01:33:30,320 --> 01:33:34,760
Speaker 1: in an upcoming episode. Just because God told you don't

1610
01:33:34,760 --> 01:33:35,439
Speaker 1: mean he told me.

1611
01:33:36,320 --> 01:33:38,559
Speaker 3: We'll see. Let me ask you.

1612
01:33:38,520 --> 01:33:43,720
Speaker 2: This as a black man, Why is marriage important to you?

1613
01:33:45,120 --> 01:33:46,800
Speaker 2: And let me set it up because it's I'm gonna

1614
01:33:46,800 --> 01:33:49,280
Speaker 2: set it up with a lot of stuff that uh,

1615
01:33:49,720 --> 01:33:54,120
Speaker 2: naysayers in the red pill community like to attack marriage

1616
01:33:54,680 --> 01:33:59,160
Speaker 2: men losing marriage, women change too much. Why in the

1617
01:33:59,160 --> 01:34:01,960
Speaker 2: world would a man and decide to get married and

1618
01:34:02,080 --> 01:34:06,040
Speaker 2: possibly lose half of his income. That's the worst decision

1619
01:34:06,080 --> 01:34:11,400
Speaker 2: somebody could ever make. Why in the world, in the

1620
01:34:11,439 --> 01:34:13,439
Speaker 2: world that's so toxic right now?

1621
01:34:13,720 --> 01:34:20,599
Speaker 1: Would you desire marriage because God laid it on my heart?

1622
01:34:20,640 --> 01:34:25,240
Speaker 1: That that's that's part of my journey. Like I don't

1623
01:34:25,280 --> 01:34:27,960
Speaker 1: I don't feel like I need to explain to anybody.

1624
01:34:28,080 --> 01:34:30,320
Speaker 1: I mean because other people say, you know, I have

1625
01:34:30,439 --> 01:34:31,679
Speaker 1: married friends to be like, bro.

1626
01:34:31,680 --> 01:34:33,519
Speaker 3: You sure you want to do this again? Like bro,

1627
01:34:33,720 --> 01:34:34,439
Speaker 3: like you got.

1628
01:34:34,280 --> 01:34:36,599
Speaker 1: All this and all this and you're willing to lose

1629
01:34:36,640 --> 01:34:39,640
Speaker 1: all this and all yeah, And it's like, but I

1630
01:34:39,640 --> 01:34:43,360
Speaker 1: serve a God man, I can't lose. Like I when

1631
01:34:43,600 --> 01:34:47,160
Speaker 1: I went through my divorce before, like I I left

1632
01:34:47,200 --> 01:34:51,040
Speaker 1: with literally nothing, me too, nothing And I was fine

1633
01:34:51,080 --> 01:34:51,400
Speaker 1: with that.

1634
01:34:51,680 --> 01:34:52,080
Speaker 3: Me too.

1635
01:34:53,160 --> 01:34:57,960
Speaker 1: Was it hard? Absolutely? But man, I got God. Man,

1636
01:34:59,120 --> 01:35:03,519
Speaker 1: God is he is Man. God has When I say

1637
01:35:03,600 --> 01:35:11,200
Speaker 1: tenfold multiply that stuff to where I'm writing checks for

1638
01:35:11,360 --> 01:35:16,559
Speaker 1: people to go to college, which at this time years

1639
01:35:16,600 --> 01:35:23,000
Speaker 1: ago I was it was probably my salary at best.

1640
01:35:24,200 --> 01:35:31,040
Speaker 1: I'm writing checks through my foundation that are paying hundreds

1641
01:35:31,080 --> 01:35:36,120
Speaker 1: of thousands of dollars to give people opportunities and give

1642
01:35:36,720 --> 01:35:40,920
Speaker 1: people resources. We're spending hundreds of thousands of dollars on

1643
01:35:41,160 --> 01:35:47,479
Speaker 1: mental health counseling for families that are not mine. So

1644
01:35:49,120 --> 01:35:51,639
Speaker 1: when I tell you I can go outside right now

1645
01:35:53,040 --> 01:35:55,880
Speaker 1: and be free and buttnecked and I don't care and

1646
01:35:55,960 --> 01:35:59,320
Speaker 1: let except for getting arrested for it, because there are

1647
01:35:59,439 --> 01:36:03,880
Speaker 1: laws like nobody can take anything from me that a

1648
01:36:03,920 --> 01:36:06,439
Speaker 1: god won't replace. There it is, so I can't go

1649
01:36:06,560 --> 01:36:10,479
Speaker 1: into this thing with a fear that, like, you know,

1650
01:36:10,760 --> 01:36:13,759
Speaker 1: this might not work out, Like I'm not even wired

1651
01:36:13,800 --> 01:36:16,360
Speaker 1: that way. When people say like, oh, well, how we

1652
01:36:16,479 --> 01:36:17,800
Speaker 1: gonna do this and how we gonna do that. I

1653
01:36:17,800 --> 01:36:19,439
Speaker 1: don't know all the details, but we're gonna do it.

1654
01:36:19,479 --> 01:36:21,639
Speaker 1: We're gonna do it, We're gonna do it. And then

1655
01:36:21,640 --> 01:36:23,360
Speaker 1: it gets done and they're like, man, that's so we

1656
01:36:23,439 --> 01:36:25,720
Speaker 1: gonna did it. I told people We're gonna have the

1657
01:36:25,800 --> 01:36:30,360
Speaker 1: largest back to school bash in the world eight years ago. Well, uh,

1658
01:36:31,560 --> 01:36:33,200
Speaker 1: what about this and what about that? I don't know

1659
01:36:33,240 --> 01:36:35,479
Speaker 1: all the details God laid on my heart. If God

1660
01:36:35,520 --> 01:36:39,479
Speaker 1: gave me the vision, it is possible that part's gonna

1661
01:36:39,479 --> 01:36:42,280
Speaker 1: come in the past. Well, have you booked the stadium yet? No,

1662
01:36:42,360 --> 01:36:44,080
Speaker 1: I haven't booked the stadium yet. But do you how

1663
01:36:44,080 --> 01:36:45,960
Speaker 1: you're gonna get done? How are you gonna? Don't ask

1664
01:36:46,000 --> 01:36:48,880
Speaker 1: me no more questions? You in or you out? My

1665
01:36:49,000 --> 01:36:51,840
Speaker 1: track record says this is gonna get done. If that

1666
01:36:51,960 --> 01:36:54,280
Speaker 1: dude says this is going to be done, that's going

1667
01:36:54,320 --> 01:36:57,800
Speaker 1: to be done. So for me in regards to me

1668
01:36:57,920 --> 01:37:00,599
Speaker 1: wanting and desiring to be a husband, like God gives

1669
01:37:00,640 --> 01:37:04,519
Speaker 1: us the desires of our hearts, that part and it

1670
01:37:04,640 --> 01:37:08,800
Speaker 1: took some time for my heart to accept the fact

1671
01:37:09,600 --> 01:37:15,120
Speaker 1: that I can be successful in this space. But it

1672
01:37:15,120 --> 01:37:18,519
Speaker 1: it's the same heart that I got married with before.

1673
01:37:19,200 --> 01:37:24,559
Speaker 1: The only difference is the life experiences, the growth that

1674
01:37:24,800 --> 01:37:30,639
Speaker 1: the the the counseling, the therapy that the released from

1675
01:37:30,720 --> 01:37:34,120
Speaker 1: traumas they're released from certain relationships, the release from certain

1676
01:37:34,160 --> 01:37:37,360
Speaker 1: mindsets on certain things. And I think in the black community,

1677
01:37:37,439 --> 01:37:40,160
Speaker 1: like we think it's taboo sometimes to go to counseling.

1678
01:37:40,200 --> 01:37:42,200
Speaker 1: We think it's taboo to go to the doctor. We

1679
01:37:42,240 --> 01:37:46,000
Speaker 1: think it's that taboo to tell people you're not okay.

1680
01:37:46,720 --> 01:37:50,360
Speaker 1: And it's like, no, if there's any community that should

1681
01:37:50,360 --> 01:37:53,080
Speaker 1: be telling people April I am, I'm not okay, it's

1682
01:37:53,120 --> 01:37:57,640
Speaker 1: the black community. Because we have to operate in spaces.

1683
01:37:58,040 --> 01:38:00,800
Speaker 1: You know, some people will colde switch out, code switch.

1684
01:38:00,920 --> 01:38:02,680
Speaker 1: I am who I am no matter where I go.

1685
01:38:04,920 --> 01:38:07,599
Speaker 1: But when you have this freedom of who God has

1686
01:38:07,640 --> 01:38:10,280
Speaker 1: called you to be, that is not like something that

1687
01:38:10,320 --> 01:38:12,000
Speaker 1: you make up. Wake up one day and be like,

1688
01:38:12,600 --> 01:38:14,680
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be everything that God called me to be.

1689
01:38:14,840 --> 01:38:17,240
Speaker 1: You can make a decision that that's what you want

1690
01:38:17,280 --> 01:38:21,759
Speaker 1: to do. But then here go Earl or Annie coming

1691
01:38:21,800 --> 01:38:25,040
Speaker 1: in and he's like, well watch this, watch me piss

1692
01:38:25,120 --> 01:38:27,599
Speaker 1: you off this morning and throw your day off, and

1693
01:38:27,640 --> 01:38:30,559
Speaker 1: do this and do that, and there's nothing that's gonna

1694
01:38:30,960 --> 01:38:35,280
Speaker 1: there's nothing that's gonna sway me from what my desire

1695
01:38:35,320 --> 01:38:38,599
Speaker 1: of my heart is. Like, yeah, I see statistics, I

1696
01:38:38,640 --> 01:38:42,960
Speaker 1: see I see failed marriages, but I also see a

1697
01:38:42,960 --> 01:38:47,840
Speaker 1: lot of successful marriages that part and every successful marriage

1698
01:38:47,880 --> 01:38:51,000
Speaker 1: that's had substance in years that go along with it.

1699
01:38:51,880 --> 01:38:55,920
Speaker 1: I played golf with a guy two weeks ago at

1700
01:38:55,920 --> 01:38:59,280
Speaker 1: Cedric Entertainer's golf tournament in La. He was eighty years old.

1701
01:39:00,120 --> 01:39:06,960
Speaker 1: He's been married for sixty years. Wow, sixty wows. And

1702
01:39:07,640 --> 01:39:11,360
Speaker 1: I was like, bro, I gotta know because it was

1703
01:39:11,360 --> 01:39:14,000
Speaker 1: a thing. I shared my testimony and everything with him,

1704
01:39:14,000 --> 01:39:15,760
Speaker 1: and he was like, man, it's He was like, I

1705
01:39:15,840 --> 01:39:17,640
Speaker 1: was really looking forward to me and my son, like

1706
01:39:17,760 --> 01:39:20,840
Speaker 1: love wrestling. I was really looking forward to spending some

1707
01:39:20,880 --> 01:39:22,599
Speaker 1: time with you, but to get to know you as

1708
01:39:22,600 --> 01:39:25,920
Speaker 1: a person. He's like, you're going to be that hudgd.

1709
01:39:25,920 --> 01:39:29,200
Speaker 1: Actually I got to if I get my phone's the phone,

1710
01:39:30,600 --> 01:39:32,120
Speaker 1: I'm gonna read you a text that he said, I

1711
01:39:32,120 --> 01:39:32,599
Speaker 1: don want.

1712
01:39:32,400 --> 01:39:39,040
Speaker 3: To see it. Mm hm hmmmm.

1713
01:39:40,520 --> 01:39:42,080
Speaker 2: I will tell the future wife he to bring it.

1714
01:39:42,080 --> 01:39:44,479
Speaker 2: And then y'all see the backside of him walking up.

1715
01:39:45,439 --> 01:39:47,839
Speaker 3: He was like, oh what, we've seen him. Yeah, we've

1716
01:39:47,840 --> 01:39:50,559
Speaker 3: seen that dress, saw the hem of a garment.

1717
01:39:52,600 --> 01:39:55,840
Speaker 2: It's interesting because I know the future wife is sitting

1718
01:39:55,840 --> 01:39:59,720
Speaker 2: there listening and saying, why does why does that? This

1719
01:40:00,000 --> 01:40:03,320
Speaker 2: a tear sounds so similar, you know, just about everything

1720
01:40:03,400 --> 01:40:06,120
Speaker 2: that you're saying. The way we look at marriage, the

1721
01:40:06,160 --> 01:40:09,200
Speaker 2: way we made failures in the past, learned from it,

1722
01:40:09,240 --> 01:40:12,040
Speaker 2: went through therapy went through heal and Ben it's totally

1723
01:40:12,760 --> 01:40:15,360
Speaker 2: transparent about our past and saying this is what I've

1724
01:40:15,360 --> 01:40:17,040
Speaker 2: done in the past, but this is what I look

1725
01:40:17,120 --> 01:40:20,360
Speaker 2: forward to being as a better man, the better husband

1726
01:40:20,400 --> 01:40:23,400
Speaker 2: for the future wife, and not letting the naysayers distract

1727
01:40:23,479 --> 01:40:25,240
Speaker 2: us from what God has called us to be.

1728
01:40:25,360 --> 01:40:26,760
Speaker 3: Go ahead, you want to read it, you want me

1729
01:40:26,840 --> 01:40:29,519
Speaker 3: to read it, go ahead? Read it? All right? Good morning?

1730
01:40:29,560 --> 01:40:29,880
Speaker 3: That is.

1731
01:40:29,960 --> 01:40:33,040
Speaker 1: I hope you had a pleasant and unevent and an

1732
01:40:33,040 --> 01:40:36,439
Speaker 1: eventful trip home. It was a real treat hanging out

1733
01:40:36,439 --> 01:40:39,519
Speaker 1: with you yesterday. I've seen you on TV many times

1734
01:40:39,640 --> 01:40:42,960
Speaker 1: and couldn't imagine what a wonderful person you are. You're

1735
01:40:43,040 --> 01:40:46,840
Speaker 1: more than that. Congratulations on the upcoming wedding because I

1736
01:40:46,880 --> 01:40:48,679
Speaker 1: know you will be an awesome husband.

1737
01:40:48,960 --> 01:40:53,479
Speaker 3: Thanks George Gibson, he said, upcoming wedding like you're engaging everything. Yeah,

1738
01:40:53,640 --> 01:40:59,280
Speaker 3: and I'm not, but I will be. At some point somebody.

1739
01:40:58,920 --> 01:41:01,040
Speaker 2: Out let me ask you this, if you met the

1740
01:41:01,040 --> 01:41:04,840
Speaker 2: person that God said this is the one. She's she's

1741
01:41:04,880 --> 01:41:07,559
Speaker 2: connected to your purpose. She's not getting the way of

1742
01:41:07,600 --> 01:41:09,840
Speaker 2: the things that God called you to do. Matter of fact,

1743
01:41:09,840 --> 01:41:13,960
Speaker 2: she's coming along, supporting it, advocating for it rillying behind it.

1744
01:41:14,160 --> 01:41:17,439
Speaker 2: How long will it take for you to marry her?

1745
01:41:17,520 --> 01:41:20,000
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say, I'm gonna go step put a ring

1746
01:41:20,000 --> 01:41:20,479
Speaker 2: on her finger.

1747
01:41:20,560 --> 01:41:23,840
Speaker 1: Proposed to Well, you know it's been my problem in

1748
01:41:23,880 --> 01:41:26,679
Speaker 1: the past, just jumping into stuff.

1749
01:41:27,920 --> 01:41:32,360
Speaker 3: But not long.

1750
01:41:33,640 --> 01:41:35,439
Speaker 2: So when you say problem in the past in the past,

1751
01:41:35,479 --> 01:41:37,240
Speaker 2: which the quickest you ever proposed to somebody?

1752
01:41:37,640 --> 01:41:40,799
Speaker 3: Uh? Probably like two months? I think two months.

1753
01:41:41,160 --> 01:41:43,400
Speaker 2: And did you feel like the speed was the wrong

1754
01:41:43,560 --> 01:41:45,160
Speaker 2: decision or no?

1755
01:41:45,400 --> 01:41:51,040
Speaker 1: I think I got caught up in the surface, okay,

1756
01:41:51,600 --> 01:41:53,680
Speaker 1: and didn't really examine the substance what.

1757
01:41:53,640 --> 01:41:56,800
Speaker 3: You want versus what you need? Correct want versus need.

1758
01:41:57,240 --> 01:42:00,320
Speaker 2: And so now since you identify want versus need is

1759
01:42:00,400 --> 01:42:03,200
Speaker 2: time and issue, so it wouldn't be too fast.

1760
01:42:03,240 --> 01:42:05,000
Speaker 3: In well, it'll be too fast.

1761
01:42:05,040 --> 01:42:11,280
Speaker 1: And everybody, come on, not that you know this before, now, no,

1762
01:42:11,320 --> 01:42:16,800
Speaker 1: come on, now, give us a breakdown. For For me,

1763
01:42:17,640 --> 01:42:21,479
Speaker 1: I I know what I know enough to the point

1764
01:42:21,520 --> 01:42:26,280
Speaker 1: where honestly, if I were to make that decision, it

1765
01:42:26,280 --> 01:42:33,120
Speaker 1: wouldn't be a long engagement, and it would it would

1766
01:42:33,160 --> 01:42:36,360
Speaker 1: not seem because I look at it like this too.

1767
01:42:36,400 --> 01:42:39,720
Speaker 1: Whenever I make this decision to whoever this person is,

1768
01:42:40,120 --> 01:42:43,800
Speaker 1: be with them like I'm literally looking at this till

1769
01:42:43,880 --> 01:42:48,080
Speaker 1: death do us part. Absolutely, So I'm not gonna know

1770
01:42:48,240 --> 01:42:51,000
Speaker 1: every single aspect, but I'm gonna know enough from God

1771
01:42:51,400 --> 01:42:54,519
Speaker 1: to be able to say this is this is this

1772
01:42:54,680 --> 01:42:59,559
Speaker 1: is it. Because again, we're human. We're gonna go through

1773
01:42:59,560 --> 01:43:02,680
Speaker 1: some stuff. Life is going to happen, jobs, whatever, like

1774
01:43:03,400 --> 01:43:06,439
Speaker 1: career change, whatever it may like. Stuff happens for people.

1775
01:43:06,479 --> 01:43:11,000
Speaker 1: To some people, they get stuck in this space of like, oh,

1776
01:43:11,120 --> 01:43:13,519
Speaker 1: this is this is where we are today. Now. I

1777
01:43:13,560 --> 01:43:15,920
Speaker 1: want to evolve, I want to grow, I want my

1778
01:43:16,120 --> 01:43:18,880
Speaker 1: I want to be a true helpmate. I want to

1779
01:43:18,920 --> 01:43:21,320
Speaker 1: be able to minister to my wife. Yes, I want

1780
01:43:21,320 --> 01:43:24,960
Speaker 1: to be able to you know, love her at her worst.

1781
01:43:25,479 --> 01:43:27,720
Speaker 1: And you know, the crazy thing of it is is

1782
01:43:27,760 --> 01:43:32,479
Speaker 1: like I could marry my wife and we could have

1783
01:43:32,560 --> 01:43:37,400
Speaker 1: the most amazing two years and then she get diagnosed

1784
01:43:37,400 --> 01:43:42,479
Speaker 1: with cancer god forbid, or she has some health issue

1785
01:43:42,520 --> 01:43:47,080
Speaker 1: that comes up. And you know, I got asked this

1786
01:43:47,200 --> 01:43:54,960
Speaker 1: question like maybe two years ago, said would you marry

1787
01:43:55,200 --> 01:44:00,640
Speaker 1: would you marry a woman that? Would you would you

1788
01:44:00,640 --> 01:44:04,439
Speaker 1: stay married to a woman that ended up like having

1789
01:44:06,160 --> 01:44:10,679
Speaker 1: like you found out she had alopecia with something whatever,

1790
01:44:10,920 --> 01:44:15,000
Speaker 1: Like you'd ever sat I was like, I would probably

1791
01:44:15,040 --> 01:44:19,519
Speaker 1: be the worst human being ever in my eyes to

1792
01:44:19,680 --> 01:44:26,800
Speaker 1: leave somebody at their most vulnerable and downpoint, Like I

1793
01:44:26,960 --> 01:44:32,920
Speaker 1: just I wouldn't want that from me, Like I get

1794
01:44:32,960 --> 01:44:35,360
Speaker 1: diagnosed with some type of illness and then all of

1795
01:44:35,400 --> 01:44:38,400
Speaker 1: a sudden, I'm not attractive and I'm not the person

1796
01:44:38,479 --> 01:44:40,680
Speaker 1: that you're not the person that I married, and this

1797
01:44:40,720 --> 01:44:43,080
Speaker 1: and that, well, it's to death, to us part for

1798
01:44:43,439 --> 01:44:44,120
Speaker 1: sickness and help.

1799
01:44:44,240 --> 01:44:46,360
Speaker 3: Yeah. I had a guess on my podcast.

1800
01:44:46,360 --> 01:44:50,639
Speaker 2: I did an episode in the Bahamas and another Bermuda

1801
01:44:51,080 --> 01:44:55,320
Speaker 2: and one of the panelists her husband left her as

1802
01:44:55,320 --> 01:44:58,679
Speaker 2: she was losing her sight, left her with like five kids,

1803
01:44:58,920 --> 01:44:59,280
Speaker 2: and she.

1804
01:44:59,280 --> 01:44:59,960
Speaker 3: Ended up going below.

1805
01:45:00,400 --> 01:45:03,760
Speaker 2: She's one hundred blind and her husband left her as

1806
01:45:03,760 --> 01:45:06,160
Speaker 2: she was losing the sight. I said, like you said,

1807
01:45:06,160 --> 01:45:08,320
Speaker 2: that's a terrible person. I'm like the fact that you

1808
01:45:08,360 --> 01:45:12,880
Speaker 2: will leave your spouse fly yeah, when they're blind with

1809
01:45:12,920 --> 01:45:16,200
Speaker 2: the kids, the five kids, I said, terrible, terrible person.

1810
01:45:16,600 --> 01:45:17,360
Speaker 3: But that's how I am.

1811
01:45:17,479 --> 01:45:20,840
Speaker 2: It's literally the heart posture I have through sickness and health,

1812
01:45:20,840 --> 01:45:21,479
Speaker 2: through depth, do.

1813
01:45:21,520 --> 01:45:23,479
Speaker 3: Us part for better or for worse.

1814
01:45:24,439 --> 01:45:26,800
Speaker 2: And the more I keep talking to you, the more

1815
01:45:26,920 --> 01:45:30,920
Speaker 2: you solidify why I am marrying this awesome woman that

1816
01:45:30,960 --> 01:45:31,880
Speaker 2: God has blessed me with.

1817
01:45:32,800 --> 01:45:35,080
Speaker 3: I'm not even a lot to you, bro, when.

1818
01:45:36,720 --> 01:45:41,360
Speaker 1: Our mutual friends, he's he's engaged, and I get a

1819
01:45:41,439 --> 01:45:45,000
Speaker 1: chance to like this is both of our first time meeting. Yeah,

1820
01:45:45,360 --> 01:45:48,320
Speaker 1: meeting your I mean and you won.

1821
01:45:48,600 --> 01:45:48,880
Speaker 3: I won.

1822
01:45:49,200 --> 01:45:53,160
Speaker 1: W You's pretty. She's pretty. She's a delta woman. You know,

1823
01:45:53,840 --> 01:45:58,000
Speaker 1: she's a college graduate business owner. You know, I ain't

1824
01:45:58,040 --> 01:46:03,120
Speaker 1: gonna say, you know, like getting that got the real

1825
01:46:03,200 --> 01:46:06,240
Speaker 1: pretty got all I had, and my teeth, she ain't

1826
01:46:06,280 --> 01:46:07,880
Speaker 1: got a whole lot of makeup.

1827
01:46:07,640 --> 01:46:11,000
Speaker 2: You guys, guys, got a pretty smile on my beauty teeth,

1828
01:46:11,000 --> 01:46:11,920
Speaker 2: all nice and pretty.

1829
01:46:12,080 --> 01:46:14,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, we're gonna make a blush. Just keep talking to

1830
01:46:14,600 --> 01:46:17,120
Speaker 1: look at her. Look at her light skin turning red.

1831
01:46:17,200 --> 01:46:21,280
Speaker 1: Now look at it, mom, here too, mama beautiful.

1832
01:46:21,360 --> 01:46:22,439
Speaker 3: Hey, so that's the thing.

1833
01:46:22,760 --> 01:46:26,719
Speaker 1: What you gotta look at the mama is feel the wrists,

1834
01:46:26,720 --> 01:46:29,760
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Like Raya, all right, ain't

1835
01:46:29,760 --> 01:46:31,040
Speaker 1: no b city in this family.

1836
01:46:31,160 --> 01:46:35,479
Speaker 3: Okay, we're good. She's gonna take care of herself for

1837
01:46:35,560 --> 01:46:36,160
Speaker 3: a long time.

1838
01:46:36,200 --> 01:46:40,520
Speaker 1: Look at mom, Mom, I'm a beautiful, fabulous I told her, said, mom, single.

1839
01:46:45,200 --> 01:46:49,800
Speaker 3: Look we got Yeah. Well, hey mom, you single. Look

1840
01:46:49,840 --> 01:46:53,320
Speaker 3: at you just giggling over the got a both bleshing.

1841
01:46:53,760 --> 01:46:56,040
Speaker 2: Listen, man, how can we support you? I know you've

1842
01:46:56,040 --> 01:46:58,439
Speaker 2: written two books. Tell us, tell us about those books

1843
01:46:58,439 --> 01:46:58,840
Speaker 2: you've written.

1844
01:46:58,920 --> 01:46:59,160
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1845
01:46:59,200 --> 01:47:01,200
Speaker 1: So the first book I wrote was There's No such

1846
01:47:01,240 --> 01:47:05,040
Speaker 1: Thing as a Bad Kid. It basically tells and chronicles

1847
01:47:05,080 --> 01:47:07,599
Speaker 1: my story about what I was told at twelve years old.

1848
01:47:07,640 --> 01:47:10,200
Speaker 1: It kind of helped change my life. And then my

1849
01:47:10,280 --> 01:47:13,000
Speaker 1: second book, my most recent book, is Wrestling with Fatherhood.

1850
01:47:13,600 --> 01:47:16,360
Speaker 1: It is my championship journey to my greatest title. It

1851
01:47:16,479 --> 01:47:19,679
Speaker 1: was not WW champ, it was not Super Bowl Champ.

1852
01:47:19,840 --> 01:47:22,760
Speaker 1: It was dad. And so I think that any man,

1853
01:47:22,960 --> 01:47:26,960
Speaker 1: what regardless of race, color, creed you, if you have

1854
01:47:27,040 --> 01:47:31,599
Speaker 1: the honor of being a dad, that it's the greatest

1855
01:47:31,600 --> 01:47:34,400
Speaker 1: title you'll ever possess. And so I just talk about

1856
01:47:34,439 --> 01:47:37,800
Speaker 1: my journey, and I you go on the heels of

1857
01:47:37,840 --> 01:47:41,320
Speaker 1: some other guys friends journey that are father's as well.

1858
01:47:41,920 --> 01:47:45,519
Speaker 1: We talk about divorced fatherhood, we talk about being in marriage,

1859
01:47:45,560 --> 01:47:49,400
Speaker 1: we talk about growing up without a dad. And I

1860
01:47:49,439 --> 01:47:53,320
Speaker 1: think it's a very solid read, obviously because not just

1861
01:47:53,400 --> 01:47:56,559
Speaker 1: because I wrote it, but I think it's something it's

1862
01:47:56,600 --> 01:47:59,800
Speaker 1: a perspective of men that we don't get a chance

1863
01:47:59,800 --> 01:48:03,240
Speaker 1: to really necessarily see because we're in the in the

1864
01:48:03,400 --> 01:48:07,040
Speaker 1: in the grind of being dad and being a husband

1865
01:48:07,080 --> 01:48:12,000
Speaker 1: and being servant and being all these things. And like

1866
01:48:12,800 --> 01:48:15,840
Speaker 1: the greatest thing that you know, no matter how your

1867
01:48:15,920 --> 01:48:20,040
Speaker 1: day is going, you know, when you come home and

1868
01:48:20,080 --> 01:48:23,160
Speaker 1: your daughter your son run up to you and they

1869
01:48:23,200 --> 01:48:26,160
Speaker 1: give you the biggest hug, Like whatever happened outside of

1870
01:48:26,200 --> 01:48:30,720
Speaker 1: those doors, it's all gone away, you know, getting a

1871
01:48:30,800 --> 01:48:34,400
Speaker 1: chance to even at my daughter's nineteen and she came

1872
01:48:34,439 --> 01:48:37,640
Speaker 1: home and laid on my laid on my chest on

1873
01:48:37,680 --> 01:48:40,800
Speaker 1: the bed and gave me the biggest hug. And all

1874
01:48:40,840 --> 01:48:44,040
Speaker 1: my kids do that when they see me, and having

1875
01:48:44,080 --> 01:48:46,439
Speaker 1: a chance to, like we made butter chicken together for

1876
01:48:46,479 --> 01:48:48,880
Speaker 1: the first time, the first time I made butter chicken.

1877
01:48:48,920 --> 01:48:51,720
Speaker 1: I love to cook. I am an excellent chef, by

1878
01:48:51,720 --> 01:48:53,960
Speaker 1: the way, ladies and gentlemen, says letting me out there

1879
01:48:54,160 --> 01:48:57,720
Speaker 1: just so y'all know, probably will be raising up on

1880
01:48:57,760 --> 01:49:02,920
Speaker 1: a cooking show at some point. But those two books

1881
01:49:02,920 --> 01:49:05,080
Speaker 1: are ways you can support me. And then obviously my

1882
01:49:05,120 --> 01:49:08,800
Speaker 1: Bullard Family Foundation. Go to Bullardfamilyfoundation dot org.

1883
01:49:09,000 --> 01:49:10,000
Speaker 3: B U. L. L. A. R.

1884
01:49:10,120 --> 01:49:13,840
Speaker 1: D Familyfoundation dot org. You'll see all the great things

1885
01:49:13,840 --> 01:49:15,759
Speaker 1: that we're doing, not only in just in the Tampa

1886
01:49:15,760 --> 01:49:19,920
Speaker 1: Bay community, but throughout communities everywhere. We partner with a

1887
01:49:19,920 --> 01:49:22,920
Speaker 1: lot of people because I do know that I'm just

1888
01:49:23,120 --> 01:49:27,160
Speaker 1: one small source of a greater source, and we all

1889
01:49:27,200 --> 01:49:29,880
Speaker 1: should be a resource to what God has called us

1890
01:49:29,920 --> 01:49:33,439
Speaker 1: to be. And if God is our greatest source, then

1891
01:49:33,560 --> 01:49:37,240
Speaker 1: we will never like resources. So I try to stay

1892
01:49:37,280 --> 01:49:42,000
Speaker 1: out of the space of you know, I think religion

1893
01:49:42,080 --> 01:49:46,160
Speaker 1: and politics have been so divisive in so many different cases,

1894
01:49:47,000 --> 01:49:49,840
Speaker 1: and it's up for people. You know, when people make

1895
01:49:49,840 --> 01:49:53,600
Speaker 1: a decision, regardless of their color, their creed, their political affiliation,

1896
01:49:53,720 --> 01:49:57,800
Speaker 1: that enough is enough. That's when real change happens. And

1897
01:49:57,840 --> 01:50:00,680
Speaker 1: you can always center that around what's what's right for

1898
01:50:00,720 --> 01:50:03,360
Speaker 1: the cause, what is the cause of this moment? And

1899
01:50:03,439 --> 01:50:06,960
Speaker 1: so I want to thank you for allowing me to

1900
01:50:06,960 --> 01:50:10,400
Speaker 1: be on this platform and allowing me to meet you,

1901
01:50:10,439 --> 01:50:14,519
Speaker 1: beautiful fiance and future mother in law, dear future mother

1902
01:50:14,560 --> 01:50:22,599
Speaker 1: in law podcast coming out. Yeah, I'm a host. Yeah,

1903
01:50:22,600 --> 01:50:27,840
Speaker 1: I'm a host with you mom. Yeah. No, But it's

1904
01:50:27,920 --> 01:50:30,519
Speaker 1: it's much like you know, I give so much credit

1905
01:50:30,600 --> 01:50:35,400
Speaker 1: to Will Packer, Yeah, and and Lighthearted for and Holly

1906
01:50:35,400 --> 01:50:39,080
Speaker 1: and Rodney Pete for giving me a space and a

1907
01:50:39,200 --> 01:50:43,280
Speaker 1: venue to be my authentic self and and also helped

1908
01:50:43,280 --> 01:50:45,799
Speaker 1: me become a better man and and and come closer

1909
01:50:45,840 --> 01:50:50,479
Speaker 1: to the one aspect of the man that I want

1910
01:50:50,479 --> 01:50:53,400
Speaker 1: to be, which is to be a husband. And uh,

1911
01:50:53,520 --> 01:50:56,680
Speaker 1: you know, it's platforms like this that not only celebrate

1912
01:50:57,280 --> 01:51:00,960
Speaker 1: the opportunity for love, but it also gives you the

1913
01:51:01,000 --> 01:51:04,160
Speaker 1: opportunity to grow. And I think this was a therapy

1914
01:51:04,240 --> 01:51:05,280
Speaker 1: session for both of us.

1915
01:51:05,280 --> 01:51:05,680
Speaker 3: It was.

1916
01:51:05,760 --> 01:51:07,360
Speaker 1: It was beautiful for your eyes.

1917
01:51:09,960 --> 01:51:13,080
Speaker 2: Oh my god, this is what's going on because because

1918
01:51:13,120 --> 01:51:15,519
Speaker 2: we have conversations like this and I share all that

1919
01:51:15,640 --> 01:51:19,120
Speaker 2: I share all about the power of Covenant and how

1920
01:51:19,280 --> 01:51:20,880
Speaker 2: I was like, girl, you ain't getting rid of me.

1921
01:51:21,000 --> 01:51:23,160
Speaker 2: I said, This is what I say to her. I said,

1922
01:51:23,520 --> 01:51:27,519
Speaker 2: if you leave me, we both leaving that nigga. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah,

1923
01:51:28,280 --> 01:51:30,240
Speaker 2: I said, we're gonna leave him. Come on, where we're going?

1924
01:51:30,479 --> 01:51:32,599
Speaker 2: I said, you ain't getting rid of him? And so

1925
01:51:32,640 --> 01:51:34,960
Speaker 2: that's what it is. It's literally to death do we part?

1926
01:51:35,240 --> 01:51:40,000
Speaker 2: When I ask you this question, no spoiler alerts, but

1927
01:51:40,040 --> 01:51:42,120
Speaker 2: what can we look forward to in the rest of

1928
01:51:42,160 --> 01:51:42,639
Speaker 2: the season.

1929
01:51:43,320 --> 01:51:47,760
Speaker 3: Uh, you can look forward to seeing more of me

1930
01:51:47,960 --> 01:51:50,800
Speaker 3: being me and uh, we do.

1931
01:51:50,960 --> 01:51:52,760
Speaker 2: We do have a little moment where the woman said

1932
01:51:52,800 --> 01:51:56,320
Speaker 2: that she'll say God told her that she was a husband,

1933
01:51:56,320 --> 01:51:58,440
Speaker 2: but she basically said you a husband.

1934
01:51:58,200 --> 01:52:01,360
Speaker 1: Yes she did. She got told her God told her

1935
01:52:01,600 --> 01:52:04,280
Speaker 1: I was her husband. Uh, we're finish, Sae.

1936
01:52:04,360 --> 01:52:07,839
Speaker 2: So so maybe maybe that text message is prophetically speaking

1937
01:52:07,880 --> 01:52:10,519
Speaker 2: about y'all getting is at the wedding, he was perfectly

1938
01:52:10,520 --> 01:52:11,120
Speaker 2: speaking about.

1939
01:52:11,680 --> 01:52:13,280
Speaker 3: I don't know what he's talking about. Bro.

1940
01:52:14,080 --> 01:52:15,560
Speaker 1: I got to watch the rest of the show, just

1941
01:52:15,640 --> 01:52:18,799
Speaker 1: like y'all do kind of figure out what's going on myself.

1942
01:52:19,960 --> 01:52:22,320
Speaker 3: I also remember too and was a lot of things

1943
01:52:22,360 --> 01:52:23,719
Speaker 3: can happen, a lot of things.

1944
01:52:24,400 --> 01:52:26,599
Speaker 1: But yeah, at the end of the day, I'm going

1945
01:52:27,040 --> 01:52:31,200
Speaker 1: you know, I think, Ah, the beautiful part about this

1946
01:52:31,360 --> 01:52:33,680
Speaker 1: journey here on King's Court is that you get the

1947
01:52:33,800 --> 01:52:39,760
Speaker 1: chance to see authentic Thaddeus at his core. I'm not

1948
01:52:39,880 --> 01:52:42,000
Speaker 1: afraid to cry, I'm not afraid to laugh. I'm not

1949
01:52:42,040 --> 01:52:47,639
Speaker 1: afraid to make people laugh. And you'll also, in my opinion,

1950
01:52:49,120 --> 01:52:52,040
Speaker 1: I feel like I'm a man's man, like I have

1951
01:52:52,280 --> 01:52:56,680
Speaker 1: had dudes text me and be like, Bro, many it.

1952
01:52:56,760 --> 01:52:58,920
Speaker 3: Was rough, you know, man, I'm so proud of you.

1953
01:52:59,040 --> 01:52:59,120
Speaker 4: Bro.

1954
01:53:00,080 --> 01:53:01,880
Speaker 1: Needed more of this we need more to do, like

1955
01:53:03,000 --> 01:53:07,080
Speaker 1: once again, like this is a this is a platform

1956
01:53:07,200 --> 01:53:10,280
Speaker 1: that God has given me to be myself. There's no greater,

1957
01:53:11,240 --> 01:53:15,880
Speaker 1: no greater like joy and knowing that people are are

1958
01:53:15,960 --> 01:53:19,040
Speaker 1: seeing me from me, you know, and it's resonating. Well yeah,

1959
01:53:19,200 --> 01:53:21,800
Speaker 1: that's the thing about it, trying to force like yeah, yeah,

1960
01:53:21,800 --> 01:53:24,559
Speaker 1: I'm like like I'm not remembering no lines, and nobody's

1961
01:53:24,640 --> 01:53:27,360
Speaker 1: like instructing me to you go over here and you're

1962
01:53:27,360 --> 01:53:30,840
Speaker 1: gonna say this and that. It's like no, you know,

1963
01:53:30,960 --> 01:53:34,360
Speaker 1: it's just like you know, one of the episodes, Chick

1964
01:53:34,479 --> 01:53:35,960
Speaker 1: came up to me and she was like, hey, I

1965
01:53:36,040 --> 01:53:37,519
Speaker 1: want to get to know you, you know, and this

1966
01:53:37,640 --> 01:53:39,519
Speaker 1: and that. I'm like, all right, cool, let's go downstairs

1967
01:53:39,560 --> 01:53:42,800
Speaker 1: and talk. Then she started talking about Carlos. That's what

1968
01:53:42,880 --> 01:53:45,519
Speaker 1: I love. So you said that that was cool. You

1969
01:53:45,560 --> 01:53:49,040
Speaker 1: was like, let's not even be talking about bro, she's

1970
01:53:49,160 --> 01:53:52,200
Speaker 1: up to waste my time talk about. You said, that's

1971
01:53:52,280 --> 01:53:54,680
Speaker 1: the thing you started by saying, you want to get

1972
01:53:54,720 --> 01:53:56,599
Speaker 1: to know me. So I'm like, all right, I'm walking

1973
01:53:56,600 --> 01:53:59,600
Speaker 1: down these stairs my knees hurting already. You want to

1974
01:53:59,600 --> 01:54:01,800
Speaker 1: talk about Carlos, Get up out of here. You want

1975
01:54:01,840 --> 01:54:04,640
Speaker 1: to hate you said, you said, hey, you need to

1976
01:54:04,840 --> 01:54:07,000
Speaker 1: talk to Carlos about Yeah, yeah, you didn't gonna talk

1977
01:54:07,000 --> 01:54:10,840
Speaker 1: to Carse. Y'all got some issues whatever it is. But

1978
01:54:10,960 --> 01:54:13,320
Speaker 1: it's just like that I'm I'm that's that you I

1979
01:54:13,439 --> 01:54:16,240
Speaker 1: am as you know, like people where they see stuff

1980
01:54:16,360 --> 01:54:19,320
Speaker 1: like that or they see, you know, the young lady

1981
01:54:19,360 --> 01:54:22,280
Speaker 1: in the first episode like, Jenny, come on now, like

1982
01:54:23,120 --> 01:54:27,080
Speaker 1: you're a white woman from Tennessee, your mama and your daddy,

1983
01:54:27,640 --> 01:54:31,080
Speaker 1: your dad is a senator, a huge job. When she

1984
01:54:31,160 --> 01:54:33,760
Speaker 1: said a huge job, I already knew come on now, Jenny.

1985
01:54:34,000 --> 01:54:37,080
Speaker 1: So if y'all you bring my black ass home or

1986
01:54:37,160 --> 01:54:40,320
Speaker 1: any of us, your daddy and your mama gonna be

1987
01:54:40,320 --> 01:54:40,640
Speaker 1: all right?

1988
01:54:40,720 --> 01:54:44,760
Speaker 3: What's that? I'm a realist, bro, Like, come on now, Jenny,

1989
01:54:45,400 --> 01:54:45,640
Speaker 3: come on.

1990
01:54:45,760 --> 01:54:48,080
Speaker 1: I'm so thankful though that she like came out and

1991
01:54:48,200 --> 01:54:51,760
Speaker 1: she was like I I you know, I gave her

1992
01:54:51,800 --> 01:54:55,480
Speaker 1: a chance to tell the truth out and she told

1993
01:54:55,520 --> 01:54:57,960
Speaker 1: the truth. So but it was, you know, it was

1994
01:54:58,040 --> 01:55:00,920
Speaker 1: some other stuff that went on that com like at

1995
01:55:01,000 --> 01:55:03,680
Speaker 1: the table, and I was just like, you know, I said,

1996
01:55:04,240 --> 01:55:08,320
Speaker 1: you speaking up and telling that truth, you know, like

1997
01:55:09,560 --> 01:55:12,480
Speaker 1: conversations need to be had, yes, you know, and.

1998
01:55:15,000 --> 01:55:16,000
Speaker 3: Most of the time, like.

1999
01:55:17,640 --> 01:55:21,680
Speaker 1: Your or women that look like you can actually get

2000
01:55:21,760 --> 01:55:25,120
Speaker 1: more advancement in the conversation than people that look like

2001
01:55:25,240 --> 01:55:28,200
Speaker 1: me or women that are my color. Like it's okay

2002
01:55:28,280 --> 01:55:31,160
Speaker 1: to talk about the divide racial divide. It's okay to

2003
01:55:34,200 --> 01:55:36,760
Speaker 1: if you haven't dated outside of your race before, Like

2004
01:55:36,840 --> 01:55:40,240
Speaker 1: it's not a crime to not date outside your race.

2005
01:55:40,480 --> 01:55:43,760
Speaker 1: Like if you want to venture into that space, do that,

2006
01:55:44,040 --> 01:55:45,520
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? But you don't have if

2007
01:55:45,560 --> 01:55:49,240
Speaker 1: you line about this like me as a black man,

2008
01:55:49,560 --> 01:55:52,960
Speaker 1: like I have to look at history, like em Maattil

2009
01:55:53,120 --> 01:55:56,240
Speaker 1: lost his life doing that because a white woman said

2010
01:55:56,280 --> 01:56:01,000
Speaker 1: he whistled at her. Yep, So there's like this deep

2011
01:56:01,080 --> 01:56:04,040
Speaker 1: root of his like America, I think, oh that was

2012
01:56:04,280 --> 01:56:06,280
Speaker 1: years ago. That was so long ago that like this

2013
01:56:06,440 --> 01:56:09,680
Speaker 1: thing is YadA YadA, YadA. Was like I've never seen

2014
01:56:10,160 --> 01:56:13,480
Speaker 1: a white man hanging from a tree, haven't. Like I've

2015
01:56:13,640 --> 01:56:16,640
Speaker 1: never seen I've never seen white men and white women

2016
01:56:16,760 --> 01:56:21,280
Speaker 1: and children be attacked by police dogs. Yep, I've never seen.

2017
01:56:24,000 --> 01:56:26,400
Speaker 1: So when people say, you know, and Jenny had said,

2018
01:56:26,440 --> 01:56:28,320
Speaker 1: you know what, I don't see color and this and that,

2019
01:56:28,440 --> 01:56:31,000
Speaker 1: Well that means you don't see my race, you don't

2020
01:56:31,040 --> 01:56:35,240
Speaker 1: see the things that come along with being a black

2021
01:56:35,320 --> 01:56:37,640
Speaker 1: man or a black woman or a black and brown person.

2022
01:56:38,640 --> 01:56:43,640
Speaker 1: And so your privilege won't even allow you to see past.

2023
01:56:45,040 --> 01:56:46,880
Speaker 1: You know, you'll you'll live in this la la land

2024
01:56:46,920 --> 01:56:49,560
Speaker 1: that like everybody should get along and everybody this and that,

2025
01:56:49,680 --> 01:56:52,120
Speaker 1: and everybody's going to love you. They love you so

2026
01:56:52,200 --> 01:56:53,800
Speaker 1: that everybody's going to love you, and that's that's not

2027
01:56:53,920 --> 01:56:54,200
Speaker 1: the game.

2028
01:56:54,360 --> 01:56:54,560
Speaker 3: True.

2029
01:56:54,720 --> 01:56:57,520
Speaker 1: I got black people in my family that like, I

2030
01:56:57,560 --> 01:57:02,280
Speaker 1: don't deal with y'all need like, yeah, yeah, that's that's

2031
01:57:02,440 --> 01:57:05,720
Speaker 1: your wife. That ain't my wife, y'all come come over here.

2032
01:57:07,320 --> 01:57:10,720
Speaker 1: She still, she talked loud, she crazy, and you you

2033
01:57:10,920 --> 01:57:13,120
Speaker 1: you barely holding on to your job. So I know

2034
01:57:13,200 --> 01:57:14,920
Speaker 1: you're gonna try to get close to me so you

2035
01:57:15,040 --> 01:57:17,040
Speaker 1: can help get your bills paid.

2036
01:57:17,080 --> 01:57:17,160
Speaker 4: Bro.

2037
01:57:17,360 --> 01:57:22,480
Speaker 3: Man, I'm in a tight spot. Man. Yeah, you ain't

2038
01:57:22,480 --> 01:57:22,920
Speaker 3: gonna need me.

2039
01:57:23,000 --> 01:57:25,800
Speaker 1: You need Jesus. Jesus who helped me. That's going will

2040
01:57:25,840 --> 01:57:29,560
Speaker 1: help you and help them. Call Jesus. Try Jesus, don't try,

2041
01:57:29,720 --> 01:57:35,080
Speaker 1: don't try me toy we way listen.

2042
01:57:35,200 --> 01:57:36,920
Speaker 3: Man, I could talk to you all day.

2043
01:57:37,040 --> 01:57:37,200
Speaker 4: Man.

2044
01:57:37,440 --> 01:57:42,280
Speaker 2: I love again how you represented on this show as

2045
01:57:42,960 --> 01:57:46,320
Speaker 2: just an emotionally aware man, as a black man, a

2046
01:57:46,480 --> 01:57:49,280
Speaker 2: man that, like you said, you start off the interview saying, Hey,

2047
01:57:50,400 --> 01:57:52,880
Speaker 2: I'm open, I'm vulnerable, I'm transfer.

2048
01:57:52,960 --> 01:57:56,640
Speaker 1: Nobody can nobody can attact me with with anything that

2049
01:57:56,760 --> 01:58:00,440
Speaker 1: I'm not. I mean, no weapon got The I say

2050
01:58:00,480 --> 01:58:02,080
Speaker 1: is that the weapons will formed, but they will not

2051
01:58:02,200 --> 01:58:05,920
Speaker 1: prospers as they talk crazy. You can do whatever, like,

2052
01:58:06,360 --> 01:58:09,680
Speaker 1: nobody can hold anything against me. Yeah, and I don't

2053
01:58:09,680 --> 01:58:10,840
Speaker 1: think they want to box you either.

2054
01:58:11,560 --> 01:58:14,840
Speaker 3: Fight. You don't want to the match because the dude

2055
01:58:14,960 --> 01:58:18,480
Speaker 3: is huge, huge, they call them.

2056
01:58:18,600 --> 01:58:23,400
Speaker 1: They call them oven mits, frying pants, banana fingers, the

2057
01:58:23,520 --> 01:58:27,760
Speaker 1: Metas they ball up, they become too two balls of fury.

2058
01:58:29,160 --> 01:58:31,320
Speaker 1: Don't let me revert back to my eight year old,

2059
01:58:31,520 --> 01:58:33,760
Speaker 1: nine year old self, because then you're really gonna get

2060
01:58:34,000 --> 01:58:36,960
Speaker 1: your head beat in, because at forty eight, I'm I

2061
01:58:37,040 --> 01:58:40,080
Speaker 1: might just jack you up, just shake your I have

2062
01:58:40,160 --> 01:58:41,800
Speaker 1: a flashback to twelve or thirteen.

2063
01:58:41,960 --> 01:58:44,640
Speaker 3: It's a problem. It's a problem. He's gonna be at

2064
01:58:44,680 --> 01:58:46,600
Speaker 3: the camp again. Yeah, I'm gonna be right back at

2065
01:58:46,640 --> 01:58:51,080
Speaker 3: the boys. Listen, man, how can people follow you on

2066
01:58:51,160 --> 01:58:51,680
Speaker 3: social media?

2067
01:58:51,800 --> 01:58:55,760
Speaker 1: They can follow me on Twitter and Instagram at Titus O'Neil,

2068
01:58:55,920 --> 01:58:58,840
Speaker 1: wwe at t I t U s O n e

2069
01:58:59,000 --> 01:59:02,360
Speaker 1: I L w W. Yes, the old Neil seems a

2070
01:59:02,400 --> 01:59:05,640
Speaker 1: little off. I came Irish convincedent man wanted me to

2071
01:59:05,960 --> 01:59:08,200
Speaker 1: have an Irish last name instead of being O n

2072
01:59:08,320 --> 01:59:11,280
Speaker 1: e A L, which is what I originally wanted. Because

2073
01:59:11,320 --> 01:59:14,720
Speaker 1: you kill O'Neil. Oh, yeah, you know is one of

2074
01:59:14,800 --> 01:59:17,000
Speaker 1: my frid brothers. But he's also everything he did in

2075
01:59:17,040 --> 01:59:19,520
Speaker 1: basketball I wanted to do in wrestling. So he was

2076
01:59:19,560 --> 01:59:22,040
Speaker 1: doing movies and film and all this and that just

2077
01:59:22,120 --> 01:59:26,440
Speaker 1: saw shock. Yesterday he calls me becuz, Oh he sees me,

2078
01:59:27,240 --> 01:59:30,160
Speaker 1: even though he's like sixteen times bigger than me. I

2079
01:59:30,240 --> 01:59:31,120
Speaker 1: hate standing around.

2080
01:59:31,200 --> 01:59:31,600
Speaker 3: I stood.

2081
01:59:31,640 --> 01:59:35,120
Speaker 1: I took a picture yesterday in between him and Dwight Howard,

2082
01:59:35,400 --> 01:59:40,160
Speaker 1: and I look like Kevin Hart in the picture, Like,

2083
01:59:40,600 --> 01:59:43,880
Speaker 1: come o man. I started to do exactly what Kevin

2084
01:59:43,960 --> 01:59:46,000
Speaker 1: does too with people that are taller than him and

2085
01:59:46,080 --> 01:59:47,360
Speaker 1: cut the head off the picture.

2086
01:59:47,600 --> 01:59:51,480
Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, hilarious.

2087
01:59:52,280 --> 01:59:56,680
Speaker 2: So Titus O'Neil wwe social media on Instagram and Twitter.

2088
01:59:57,040 --> 01:59:59,839
Speaker 2: Hey make sure y'all go pick up his book. Go Amazon,

2089
02:00:00,000 --> 02:00:02,839
Speaker 2: go to the website, go dondate to this foundation.

2090
02:00:03,440 --> 02:00:04,120
Speaker 3: Hey man, I.

2091
02:00:04,200 --> 02:00:07,960
Speaker 2: Salute your king, young king, as your kids call you, uh,

2092
02:00:08,280 --> 02:00:15,120
Speaker 2: mister aka handsome mister aka gorgeous ladies learned something I

2093
02:00:15,160 --> 02:00:19,280
Speaker 2: don't be over the using. Let me ask you just

2094
02:00:19,280 --> 02:00:21,400
Speaker 2: before we let go, what is your dating age range?

2095
02:00:21,440 --> 02:00:23,360
Speaker 2: If you said your wife, is there an age limit

2096
02:00:23,440 --> 02:00:24,720
Speaker 2: from the youngest of the oldest.

2097
02:00:28,280 --> 02:00:32,480
Speaker 1: I probably would not date anybody under thirty eight thirty

2098
02:00:32,520 --> 02:00:33,400
Speaker 1: eight and then the oldest.

2099
02:00:34,600 --> 02:00:37,200
Speaker 4: I don't have no oldest. Okay, you'll get best sixty five.

2100
02:00:37,800 --> 02:00:45,240
Speaker 4: How old you as mom, whatever she is, that's all

2101
02:00:45,360 --> 02:00:45,480
Speaker 4: of you.

2102
02:00:45,600 --> 02:00:45,800
Speaker 3: Mom.

2103
02:00:47,520 --> 02:00:51,480
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, sixty five might be sixty five. Sixty five,

2104
02:00:51,560 --> 02:00:56,000
Speaker 1: might be sixty five sixty five, right a peach cobbler.

2105
02:00:57,080 --> 02:00:59,800
Speaker 1: I need some sugar free versions, dairy free versions now,

2106
02:01:00,040 --> 02:01:04,320
Speaker 1: I'm trying to keep this, you know what I mean. Yeah,

2107
02:01:06,360 --> 02:01:08,880
Speaker 1: so he said thirty eight to sixty five, there it is. Yeah,

2108
02:01:09,120 --> 02:01:11,520
Speaker 1: it could be older to depending on how they look.

2109
02:01:11,920 --> 02:01:14,680
Speaker 1: He's taking me a little bit up. I don't mind

2110
02:01:14,720 --> 02:01:18,440
Speaker 1: a little seasoning at all. Well, we both were both going,

2111
02:01:18,600 --> 02:01:20,320
Speaker 1: we're both going. Were both on the back end of

2112
02:01:20,400 --> 02:01:27,080
Speaker 1: life anyway. So also to the older you are, the

2113
02:01:27,960 --> 02:01:31,360
Speaker 1: the less you give a damn about like a lot

2114
02:01:31,400 --> 02:01:33,280
Speaker 1: of stuff, you know what I mean, Like, yeah, you

2115
02:01:33,320 --> 02:01:36,960
Speaker 1: don't care about no Instagram followers and you know, getting

2116
02:01:37,000 --> 02:01:39,240
Speaker 1: the right angle and all this and that, like, take

2117
02:01:39,320 --> 02:01:41,800
Speaker 1: the picture, man, take the picture. One, two, three, cheese,

2118
02:01:41,880 --> 02:01:45,000
Speaker 1: let's go, let's roll. I'm trying to eat. I need

2119
02:01:45,080 --> 02:01:47,160
Speaker 1: to be laying flat by nine o'clock so I can

2120
02:01:47,240 --> 02:01:50,280
Speaker 1: get up and work out. I want to watch TV.

2121
02:01:50,640 --> 02:01:56,440
Speaker 1: I want to watch my story. I don't know why CNN.

2122
02:01:56,560 --> 02:01:58,160
Speaker 1: I want to go to games. I want to go

2123
02:01:58,240 --> 02:02:00,960
Speaker 1: to plays like you're talking about. Yeah, I don't need

2124
02:02:01,080 --> 02:02:03,640
Speaker 1: nobody trying to go to the club and trying to

2125
02:02:03,640 --> 02:02:06,360
Speaker 1: be at the hookah lounge. You're not like, No, that

2126
02:02:06,480 --> 02:02:09,320
Speaker 1: ain't mean gonna go eat. We're gonna go to some

2127
02:02:09,600 --> 02:02:13,480
Speaker 1: some some fun activities. We're gonna travel and go sleep. Yeah,

2128
02:02:13,560 --> 02:02:20,280
Speaker 1: We're gonna go to sleep after after after, sleep after after, Yeah,

2129
02:02:20,760 --> 02:02:25,320
Speaker 1: extra curric We never want to preclude that from them.

2130
02:02:25,320 --> 02:02:28,520
Speaker 1: We're gonna put each other, put each other to bed. Yeah, amen,

2131
02:02:28,720 --> 02:02:30,320
Speaker 1: go to sleep, Night night night.

2132
02:02:31,280 --> 02:02:31,480
Speaker 3: Y'all.

2133
02:02:31,520 --> 02:02:35,160
Speaker 2: Give it up to my boy Patty's Buller aka tit

2134
02:02:35,240 --> 02:02:36,880
Speaker 2: us over nill give it up to him, y'all.

2135
02:02:39,120 --> 02:02:41,200
Speaker 3: Stay tuned to the end for a letter to my

2136
02:02:41,280 --> 02:02:41,840
Speaker 3: future wife.

2137
02:02:42,440 --> 02:02:52,360
Speaker 2: Right in these love letters, Ladarium Thrust it suddenly into

2138
02:02:52,440 --> 02:02:53,600
Speaker 2: child protective services.

2139
02:02:53,680 --> 02:02:57,720
Speaker 3: In twenty fifteen, my nephew black a boy.

2140
02:02:58,360 --> 02:03:01,760
Speaker 2: The likelihood have been adopted outside out of kinship, slim

2141
02:03:01,840 --> 02:03:07,200
Speaker 2: to none. Armie sixteen years old, black a boy with

2142
02:03:07,440 --> 02:03:09,960
Speaker 2: five years in the Falseter care system before I even

2143
02:03:10,040 --> 02:03:14,560
Speaker 2: knew his name. The likelihood have ever been adopted? Yep,

2144
02:03:14,640 --> 02:03:19,839
Speaker 2: you guessed it. Slim to none. While Laderian and Ourmiani

2145
02:03:19,880 --> 02:03:22,920
Speaker 2: were trying to survive and barely thrive in an overpopulated

2146
02:03:22,960 --> 02:03:26,040
Speaker 2: and underfunded false care system, I was living my own life,

2147
02:03:26,160 --> 02:03:29,240
Speaker 2: doing well professionally, having been a single father with a

2148
02:03:29,360 --> 02:03:31,640
Speaker 2: daughter who at that point was doing well in college.

2149
02:03:32,120 --> 02:03:35,080
Speaker 3: It was my time to live my life right wrong.

2150
02:03:36,200 --> 02:03:39,480
Speaker 3: I felt unsettled, tireless, agitated.

2151
02:03:40,440 --> 02:03:43,760
Speaker 2: There are just two many of our black children stuck

2152
02:03:44,080 --> 02:03:47,360
Speaker 2: in ambiguity and in the limbo of the Falseter care system.

2153
02:03:48,080 --> 02:03:52,080
Speaker 2: In twenty seventeen, I legally adopted my nephew Ladarian. Fast

2154
02:03:52,120 --> 02:03:54,400
Speaker 2: forward to twenty nineteen. I had no ties to this

2155
02:03:54,560 --> 02:03:56,960
Speaker 2: other young king, but I felt God instructed me to

2156
02:03:57,080 --> 02:04:00,560
Speaker 2: adopt him also in al Babe, starting over where parenting

2157
02:04:00,640 --> 02:04:03,480
Speaker 2: should have been enough right, Working with various foster care

2158
02:04:03,520 --> 02:04:06,720
Speaker 2: and adoption agencies to help bring awareness to the countless

2159
02:04:06,880 --> 02:04:10,280
Speaker 2: young Black Kings and the foster care system should have decreased.

2160
02:04:10,400 --> 02:04:14,160
Speaker 2: My agitation right join the board of directors of Advantage

2161
02:04:14,160 --> 02:04:17,760
Speaker 2: of Adoption and organization that helps find permanent adoptive homes

2162
02:04:17,960 --> 02:04:20,080
Speaker 2: for children in falter care should have led to some

2163
02:04:20,320 --> 02:04:21,120
Speaker 2: type of resolve.

2164
02:04:21,240 --> 02:04:25,600
Speaker 3: Right, No, not at all. None of it felt like

2165
02:04:25,760 --> 02:04:26,760
Speaker 3: I had done enough.

2166
02:04:27,840 --> 02:04:31,920
Speaker 2: I now realized that every one of those experiences was

2167
02:04:32,040 --> 02:04:36,440
Speaker 2: land the fundamental foundation for my life's mission. Kingdom Royal.

2168
02:04:37,400 --> 02:04:40,040
Speaker 2: Kingdom Royal would be a luxury, state of the art

2169
02:04:40,120 --> 02:04:43,280
Speaker 2: home for foster boys. Our first location will be in

2170
02:04:43,360 --> 02:04:46,320
Speaker 2: the Dallas Fort Work Metroplex. We will utilize the whole

2171
02:04:46,440 --> 02:04:51,000
Speaker 2: person approach that instills identity, empowers them to advocate for themselves,

2172
02:04:51,280 --> 02:04:55,560
Speaker 2: and enlightens them regarding new perspectives and limitless options.

2173
02:04:55,320 --> 02:04:57,600
Speaker 3: That they thought were impossible.

2174
02:04:58,800 --> 02:05:01,120
Speaker 2: Though the young Kings will attend the local public schools

2175
02:05:01,120 --> 02:05:04,240
Speaker 2: that are in proximity to King of Royale. Our at

2176
02:05:04,280 --> 02:05:08,120
Speaker 2: home curriculum will broaden their worldview through participating in the arts,

2177
02:05:08,280 --> 02:05:13,080
Speaker 2: attending various cultural events, learning about and engaging in multifaceted

2178
02:05:13,160 --> 02:05:17,840
Speaker 2: discussions about current events and even relevant historical contexts, introducing

2179
02:05:17,920 --> 02:05:20,879
Speaker 2: them to gardening and landscaping, and even caring.

2180
02:05:20,760 --> 02:05:24,080
Speaker 3: For our animals on our form and on site stables.

2181
02:05:24,840 --> 02:05:28,240
Speaker 2: We just launched our startup capital campaign with the goal

2182
02:05:28,280 --> 02:05:29,920
Speaker 2: of raising two point eight million dollars.

2183
02:05:29,960 --> 02:05:31,360
Speaker 3: Now why two point eight million dollars?

2184
02:05:32,240 --> 02:05:34,560
Speaker 2: Well, In twenty seventeen, I created a web series in

2185
02:05:34,600 --> 02:05:37,240
Speaker 2: which I performed random acts of kindness.

2186
02:05:37,080 --> 02:05:41,120
Speaker 3: For targeting the homeless community. One of the most notable successes.

2187
02:05:40,800 --> 02:05:43,840
Speaker 2: Was that one of the videos went viral, garnering twenty

2188
02:05:44,000 --> 02:05:48,280
Speaker 2: eight million views. However, one of my biggest regrets is

2189
02:05:48,320 --> 02:05:50,560
Speaker 2: that I didn't raise a single dollar to help in

2190
02:05:50,680 --> 02:05:54,760
Speaker 2: implementing a more sustainable plan for the homeless community. So,

2191
02:05:54,960 --> 02:05:58,920
Speaker 2: throughout the years, with much remorse, I reflect that am

2192
02:05:58,960 --> 02:06:01,960
Speaker 2: not maximizing that moment. I knew if at that time

2193
02:06:02,560 --> 02:06:05,480
Speaker 2: just ten percent of the viewers donated one dollar, we

2194
02:06:05,560 --> 02:06:09,000
Speaker 2: would have raised at least two point eight million dollars

2195
02:06:09,160 --> 02:06:11,600
Speaker 2: that could have really established long term support for the

2196
02:06:11,680 --> 02:06:14,920
Speaker 2: homeless community, or at least started a long term.

2197
02:06:14,840 --> 02:06:19,280
Speaker 3: Initiative to do so. This is my do over, this

2198
02:06:19,640 --> 02:06:20,960
Speaker 3: is our new beginning.

2199
02:06:21,160 --> 02:06:24,640
Speaker 2: Together, we can attack this at the route by specifically

2200
02:06:24,760 --> 02:06:29,880
Speaker 2: helping our homeless Black boys who are already disproportionately represented

2201
02:06:30,080 --> 02:06:31,760
Speaker 2: in the American fossil care system.

2202
02:06:32,440 --> 02:06:33,680
Speaker 3: I'm a Terisarwickfield.

2203
02:06:33,680 --> 02:06:37,080
Speaker 2: I've been nominated for three regional Emmys documenting my work

2204
02:06:37,120 --> 02:06:40,040
Speaker 2: with the homeless as well as my personal adoption journey.

2205
02:06:40,640 --> 02:06:45,040
Speaker 2: Despite those accolades, the greatest award for me is truly

2206
02:06:45,240 --> 02:06:50,880
Speaker 2: providing the infrastructure for a transformed life. Visit Kingdomroyal dot

2207
02:06:50,960 --> 02:06:54,520
Speaker 2: com for more details Crown of King and make a

2208
02:06:54,600 --> 02:07:05,160
Speaker 2: donation today. Oh man, that episode was very powerful. I

2209
02:07:05,320 --> 02:07:08,960
Speaker 2: love to chopping it up with fellow kings to be

2210
02:07:09,040 --> 02:07:11,600
Speaker 2: able to be vulnerable, transparent. I love it when men

2211
02:07:12,480 --> 02:07:14,560
Speaker 2: have gone through therapy. Y'all know how much I recommend

2212
02:07:14,640 --> 02:07:16,440
Speaker 2: therapy on the Dear Future WiFi podcast.

2213
02:07:16,520 --> 02:07:18,240
Speaker 3: So I love it. I love it. I love it.

2214
02:07:18,720 --> 02:07:22,200
Speaker 2: And what made this episode extra special was my future

2215
02:07:22,240 --> 02:07:26,240
Speaker 2: WIFEI was sitting in watching us record the episode along

2216
02:07:26,320 --> 02:07:30,560
Speaker 2: with my future mother in love, and she's still watching

2217
02:07:30,680 --> 02:07:35,080
Speaker 2: me as I get ready to record this letter, which

2218
02:07:35,160 --> 02:07:37,320
Speaker 2: she was a beautiful distraction to as y'all hear in

2219
02:07:37,360 --> 02:07:40,280
Speaker 2: this letter. So here's my favorite part of the podcast

2220
02:07:40,320 --> 02:07:43,800
Speaker 2: where I speak to my future wifey, dear future WIFEI

2221
02:07:44,120 --> 02:07:46,200
Speaker 2: this is the first time you watch me record an

2222
02:07:46,240 --> 02:07:50,120
Speaker 2: episode of the very podcast that was created to find you.

2223
02:07:51,400 --> 02:07:54,200
Speaker 2: Now you sit on my right side watching me write

2224
02:07:54,280 --> 02:07:56,920
Speaker 2: this letter to you. Please stop kissing me on my face.

2225
02:07:57,480 --> 02:08:00,320
Speaker 2: I'm trying my best to concentrate writing this letter. You

2226
02:08:00,400 --> 02:08:04,760
Speaker 2: are our beautiful distraction. Okay, letters done, your future love you.

2227
02:08:07,360 --> 02:08:09,720
Speaker 2: I hope you enjoyed this episode of the Dear Future

2228
02:08:09,760 --> 02:08:15,280
Speaker 2: WIFEI podcast. Remember be lit, live intentionally and transparently, and

2229
02:08:15,400 --> 02:08:16,200
Speaker 2: don't stop loving.

2230
02:08:16,640 --> 02:08:19,640
Speaker 3: Make sure to subscribe to our Dear Future WIFEI YouTube channel.

2231
02:08:19,840 --> 02:08:23,320
Speaker 2: We're available on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, and Stitcher.

2232
02:08:23,600 --> 02:08:26,400
Speaker 2: You welcome your support. Simply share our podcasts with your

2233
02:08:26,440 --> 02:08:27,120
Speaker 2: friends and family.