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Speaker 1: You posted a video. When I saw it, it literally

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Speaker 1: arrested me. What made you post that video?

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Speaker 2: I was tired of the world having a hold of

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Speaker 2: my story. If I was quiet for years, it was wow.

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Speaker 2: Lies spread all over the place concerning this. It'll be

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Speaker 2: four years that I've been divorced March fourth, and I'm

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Speaker 2: doing exactly what my divorce date says, Marching fourth. Hunh.

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Speaker 3: Who is kor Jakes?

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Speaker 2: Korra is goofy, unapologetic, blunt, very wise, and a prayer warrior.

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Speaker 1: I remember seeing a cover of Time magazine and they

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Speaker 1: had Bishop TD Jake's face on the cover. It said,

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Speaker 1: is this the next Billy Graham?

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Speaker 2: We grew up in the foundation of faith, but not

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Speaker 2: in the obligation to it.

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Speaker 4: At what point did you know what your dad meant

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Speaker 4: to the world.

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Speaker 2: I guess it would have to be when we moved

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Speaker 2: down here. We lost our names. When we came down here.

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Speaker 2: Every headline that we would ever be on from that

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Speaker 2: and on would be Bishop Jake's daughter.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes people assume that there's some level of jealousy because

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Speaker 1: you may see your sister blow up, but I always

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Speaker 1: see you support her so much.

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Speaker 2: Big sister is my favorite post. It hurts me if

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Speaker 2: I'm not able to be behind her.

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Speaker 1: God, when is it going to be my time? How

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Speaker 1: did you reconcile that in your.

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Speaker 2: Mind that was my time? I don't think that the

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Speaker 2: time is the platform. I think the time is the assignment.

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Speaker 2: I'm not waiting for God to do something in me.

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Speaker 2: He is doing something in me already.

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Speaker 3: Have you been on dates since you've been divorced.

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Speaker 2: I've been on three dates since my divorce, and all

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Speaker 2: of them were epic fails. I also get fanboys. Let's

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Speaker 2: talk about the ones that want Bishop and not his daughter,

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Speaker 2: and that I am five nine and not mature enough

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Speaker 2: for anyone shorter. The minute we get in a fight,

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Speaker 2: I'm going to tell you to get on the stairs

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Speaker 2: when you're talking.

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Speaker 1: Before h we concluding, I have you write a key

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Speaker 1: to love. Please whatever God lays on your heart, to

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Speaker 1: just pray for Asini.

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Speaker 5: Absolutely.

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Speaker 1: What started as a search for understanding became a journey

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Speaker 1: of transformation. Every letter that I wrote led me to

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Speaker 1: this day. The day I got married November the twenty second,

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Speaker 1: twenty twenty five.

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Speaker 6: Dear, my forever, Forever is a long time. That's how

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Speaker 6: long I'll love you. Those lyrics echo through every fiber

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Speaker 6: of my soul at the very thought of you.

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Speaker 1: This journey has culminated with you as both the award

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Speaker 1: and the reward of my pursuit of love. You are

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Speaker 1: the award, the honor God placed before me, the recognition

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Speaker 1: of growth, healing, and becoming the man I needed to be.

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Speaker 6: And you are the reward, the blessing given after endurance,

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Speaker 6: the gift promised to those who refuse to faint.

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Speaker 1: This isn't just our story, this is for all of us.

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Speaker 3: I'm a Terrassaar Whitfield.

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Speaker 6: I'm Ashley are Whitfield.

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Speaker 5: Welcome to the podcasts.

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Speaker 3: Welcome to a Dear Future Wife podcast. I'm your host

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Speaker 3: of TerraSAR.

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Speaker 4: Whitfield, and I'm Ashley our Whitfield.

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Speaker 3: Are you still shacking up with us? If you're still

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Speaker 3: shacking up with us, come on, can I get a commitment?

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Speaker 3: Hit that subscription button and do what else?

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Speaker 7: Subscribe to May and make sure you.

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Speaker 1: Turn on your notification bell so you'll be notified about

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Speaker 1: upcoming episodes. Hey, listen, we just dropped Student of Love.

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Speaker 1: It was released on January the thirteenth, and listen, I'm

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Speaker 1: loving the feedback that I've been hearing from the book already.

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Speaker 1: We've had this launch team and been working with them

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Speaker 1: as they've been talking about how impactful the book has been.

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Speaker 1: But if you haven't heard about Student of Love. Matter

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Speaker 1: of fact, we're just gonna drop this promo video right now.

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Speaker 1: Student of Love releases January thirteenth. But I want to

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Speaker 1: share with you a voice memo I received via text

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Speaker 1: from my friend Rachel Silver. Now always hire Rachel when

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Speaker 1: I'm working on major projects to help me ide aid

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Speaker 1: and organize my thoughts and ideas, and I did that

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Speaker 1: with Student of Love, and she challenged me a lot

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Speaker 1: with some of my thoughts and ideas.

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Speaker 3: But listen, listen, listen, listen.

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Speaker 2: To this, Haley Terris.

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Speaker 8: I'm super, super excited because in a few weeks, I

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Speaker 8: am going to be.

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Speaker 2: A married woman.

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Speaker 8: And as I reflect not only just on the relationship

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Speaker 8: that he and I have, but just over the last

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Speaker 8: few years, how God has really placed people like you

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Speaker 8: on my life to just help to bring forth new

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Speaker 8: insight and new purpose and help to bring forth growth.

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Speaker 2: I've always known.

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Speaker 8: That we would create something that would impact the world,

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Speaker 8: but I didn't always know that we would create something

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Speaker 8: that would impact my world. And so as we were

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Speaker 8: working on our last project, as you were sharing your

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Speaker 8: stories and sharing, you know, just about being a student

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Speaker 8: of love and just about navigating this thing called love,

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Speaker 8: it really allowed me to to gain new insight.

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Speaker 2: It allowed me to process.

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Speaker 8: Not just internally, cause you know, I was processing verbally too,

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Speaker 8: talking to you about.

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Speaker 2: Things as well.

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Speaker 8: And even when it wasn't about me, you just really

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Speaker 8: allowed that space and I appreciate that. And even when

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Speaker 8: I didn't agree with everything that you were saying.

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Speaker 2: Cause I didn't let me not agree with a lot

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Speaker 2: of it, but.

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Speaker 8: Not all of it, I was still like, well, you

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Speaker 8: know what, let me try this out. Let me see

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Speaker 8: what this is like in real life. And so I

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Speaker 8: got to try that out while I was dating. I

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Speaker 8: was dating him, and I'm like, hey, I guess.

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Speaker 1: You know, maybe Willie Terence is say it's.

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Speaker 8: Working a little bit because apparently I'm getting.

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Speaker 2: Married a couple of weeks.

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Speaker 8: So it's just really been cool. And it's been called

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Speaker 8: applying a thing that God has given you in my life,

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Speaker 8: and I'm just I just I'm just really grateful.

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Speaker 3: What are you waiting on? Pre order this book now? Again?

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Speaker 1: Love isn't about finding the right person. It's about becoming

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Speaker 1: the right person. And we're so excited about today's guest.

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Speaker 1: I've been knowing this queen for years. I grew up

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Speaker 1: in the ministry that her father has been blessed to build.

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Speaker 1: And you know, we just gonna jump right on into

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Speaker 1: it without further ado. Welcome to a Dear Future Wifie podcast,

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Speaker 1: my homie sister, Cora Jake.

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Speaker 3: How you're doing, Queen?

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Speaker 2: Hello, I'm fine, Thank you for having me listen.

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Speaker 1: You shared something before we started recording, and what did

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Speaker 1: you share about the Dear Future Wifie Podcast.

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Speaker 9: Oh?

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Speaker 2: It was on my vision board. Really, yes, since why,

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Speaker 2: I haven't even completed it. It was on my vision

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Speaker 2: board to be on the podcast and intentionally with you

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Speaker 2: and whoever your wife was going to be.

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Speaker 3: So you want to wait till then?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Why?

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Speaker 2: I felt like there was honor in the process of

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Speaker 2: what you have done and I wanted to be a

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Speaker 2: part of the promise, A.

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Speaker 3: Part of the promise. Listen. Man, Like I said, we

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Speaker 3: go way back.

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Speaker 1: So my question to you is, if someone were to

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Speaker 1: ask you who is Cora Jakes, how would you surmise that.

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Speaker 2: Cora is goofy free, unapologetic, blunt, very wise, and a

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Speaker 2: prayer warrior.

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Speaker 1: Mm so you said blunt. I've been accused of being

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Speaker 1: that my whole life.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, mine too.

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Speaker 3: You said the same thing too.

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Speaker 2: Right, no filter?

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Speaker 7: Yeah, he's a little blunt.

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Speaker 3: No, I ain'talking about me. I'm talking about you said

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Speaker 3: you was blood.

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Speaker 7: Oh I am blunt, just not ask blunt.

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Speaker 2: That's all right, that's not get together blunt.

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Speaker 1: And so when when you hit the word blood and

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Speaker 1: people say you're blunt, what do you think about that?

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Speaker 2: It's that's who I am. I'm very direct. I don't

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Speaker 2: feel like I do well with filters, and so I'm

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Speaker 2: normally if it comes up, it comes out with That's

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Speaker 2: what my mom says about me. If it comes up,

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Speaker 2: it comes out.

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Speaker 3: If it comes up, if I think.

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Speaker 2: About it, I'm likely to say it.

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Speaker 3: Have you tried to learn throughout you know? Growth?

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Speaker 10: It is?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I just I don't have a filter, and I

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Speaker 2: let people know that most people that are around me.

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Speaker 2: It's not like I'm rude and just I'm direct. Like,

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Speaker 2: if you ask me a question, I'm going to tell

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Speaker 2: you that.

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Speaker 1: Yourth I asked you earlier this question. Growing up in

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Speaker 1: a very prominent family, Did you feel a responsibility to

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Speaker 1: just buy default to be in ministry?

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Speaker 2: Not at all, Not at all. My parents actually were

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Speaker 2: very very good at making sure that we got to

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Speaker 2: be kids, and we got to build snow forts and

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Speaker 2: and you know, we had story time and family meetings

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Speaker 2: and very just average. You know, at home, we didn't

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Speaker 2: have to preach. We didn't have to We weren't doing

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Speaker 2: like Bible trivias and things like that. You know, like

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Speaker 2: my mom wasn't waking us up at three in the

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Speaker 2: morning for us to do devotional you know, it was

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Speaker 2: you develop what you want in your relationship. We believe

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Speaker 2: in God, We believe in Christ who grew up in church.

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Speaker 2: All of my siblings are born on Sunday. So yeow,

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Speaker 2: yeah right, it's crazy. So we grew up in the

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Speaker 2: foundation of faith, but not in the obligation to it.

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Speaker 1: The foundation of faith, but not the obligation. Yes, what

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Speaker 1: do you think about that, Ashley? Would you assume growing

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Speaker 1: up as a p K and your father is the

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Speaker 1: most prominent preacher. I remember seeing a cover of Time

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Speaker 1: magazine when I was in my early twenties, and I said,

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Speaker 1: is this the next Billy Graham? And they had Bishop

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Speaker 1: TD Jake's face on the cover. I would think that

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Speaker 1: if your father was the biggest preacher in the world,

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Speaker 1: that you gotta be the person that now everybody in

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Speaker 1: this family has to be called the ministry.

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Speaker 2: Well, you know, funny enough, I didn't know who Billy

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Speaker 2: Graham was when he was home the Time magazine cover,

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Speaker 2: so it was like, well, I don't know that he

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Speaker 2: would be the next so we got to figure out

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Speaker 2: who this manny it's But no, it wasn't a It

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Speaker 2: wasn't a big thing like there's five of us. My

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Speaker 2: dad didn't ask any of us to take on preaching.

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Speaker 2: It was something that we literally were called to do, Sarah, like,

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Speaker 2: was the least likely that you would have expected out

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Speaker 2: of the siblings to be preaching every Sunday? Taking over

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Speaker 2: the church like that was very far. But it wasn't

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Speaker 2: something like that was like, like, I'm a preacher, y'all

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Speaker 2: gonna be a preacher.

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Speaker 4: To know, at what point did you know what your

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Speaker 4: dad meant to the world.

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Speaker 2: Oh, wow, that's a good question. Uh, I guess it

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Speaker 2: would have to be when we moved down here because

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Speaker 2: we're from West Virginia, very small, like one Mall one

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Speaker 2: movie theater, like we were storefront church. And when we

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Speaker 2: moved down here, it was like people were asking for

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Speaker 2: our autographs, and like we became Bishop Jake's daughters, and

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Speaker 2: it was like in West Virginia, I'm Cora. I don't

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Speaker 2: know what's going on here an autograph? What do you

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Speaker 2: need an autograph for it? And so we lost our

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Speaker 2: names when we came down here and we became Bishop

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Speaker 2: Jake's daughter. We became Bishop Jake's kids, and every headline

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Speaker 2: that we would ever be on from that moment on

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Speaker 2: would be Bishop Jake's daughter, Bishop Jake's and kid, Bishop

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Speaker 2: Jake so and so and so. That's why I came

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Speaker 2: up with call me Cora, because when I came down

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Speaker 2: I lost my name, and when God called me, he

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Speaker 2: called me Cora.

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Speaker 7: Wow, yeah, how old? How old were you?

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Speaker 2: I was twelve years old when God called me. I

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Speaker 2: was five years old when I said I was going

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Speaker 2: to be a preacher and explained that we were at

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Speaker 2: my kindergarten graduation. I was in a predominantly white school

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Speaker 2: their female preachers. Was like, really unheard of, I'm five

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Speaker 2: years old. And the principal at the graduation said, tell

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Speaker 2: us your name and how old you are and what

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Speaker 2: you're going to be when you grow up. And I

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Speaker 2: grabbed the mic from her and I said, my name

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Speaker 2: is Cora Jakes. I'm five years old, and when I

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Speaker 2: grow up, I'm going to be a preacher, just like

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Speaker 2: my daddy. And all of them look shock like females

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Speaker 2: aren't supposed to preach, like that's not a thing. But

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Speaker 2: my dad was grinning ear to ear in the back

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Speaker 2: of the room, like that's my girl, And I'm my

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Speaker 2: dad's firstborn daughter, firstborn child, And it's been an honor

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Speaker 2: growing up watching him and God call me. To be

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Speaker 2: a part of carrying that legacy is an amazing honor.

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Speaker 2: People always say, like, y'all sounded like we're Like, who

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Speaker 2: are we supposed to sound like? When you hear us preach,

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Speaker 2: Like are we not supposed to sound like our dad?

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Speaker 2: Are we not supposed to sound like our mom?

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Speaker 1: Like?

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Speaker 2: Who are we supposed to sound like? It's been it's

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Speaker 2: been an honor to be called but not obligated, to be.

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Speaker 1: Called but not obligated. You keep using that word. Why

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Speaker 1: does that so important? Not to be obligated?

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Speaker 2: Because people think that we are People think that because

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Speaker 2: of who my dad is, like, he put this obligation

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Speaker 2: on us to carry on his legacy to be preachers

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Speaker 2: and to be pastors. And that wasn't what I gravitated to.

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Speaker 2: I gravitated to my dad being able to heal hurting people,

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Speaker 2: and I wanted to be able to do that too,

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Speaker 2: And it just so happened that we were able to

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Speaker 2: use the Gospel of Jesus Christ to be able to

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Speaker 2: initiate that healing. And so the same thing with my sister.

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Speaker 2: She wanted her story to mean something, to be a testimony,

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Speaker 2: to be something to someone, and so we just so

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Speaker 2: happened to use the Gospel of Jesus Christ to pursue

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Speaker 2: that that purpose.

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Speaker 1: You know, what I love about you is that sometimes

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Speaker 1: people could assume that there's some level of jealousy because

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Speaker 1: you may see your sister blow up, but I always

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Speaker 1: see you support her so much.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's my favorite post. It's my favorite post. Big

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Speaker 2: Sister is my favorite post. It hurts me if I'm

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Speaker 2: not able to be behind her. She'll say, we're preaching Sunday,

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Speaker 2: So you know, yeah, we're preaching Sunday. We're doing this

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Speaker 2: and you can tell a difference and when we're together,

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Speaker 2: united and and I'm backing her or when I'm she's

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Speaker 2: backing me, we do the same thing. And again, our

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Speaker 2: parents didn't raise us like that. You're not gonna be

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Speaker 2: in competition. It's not one, it's greater than the other.

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Speaker 2: My dad called me his secret weapon. For years, people

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Speaker 2: thought that it was I was being hidden and I

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Speaker 2: wasn't the part. I didn't look the part. I didn't

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Speaker 2: look the role, and Sarah looks the role. But no,

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Speaker 2: I was my dad's secret weapon. I was the intercessor

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Speaker 2: for the family. I was in the back ground, praying

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Speaker 2: and covering our family. That's what my post is. And

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Speaker 2: so I've never been jealous. I've always been on post,

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Speaker 2: and I tell people all the time, when God wants

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Speaker 2: me on the forefront, he puts me up there. But

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Speaker 2: until then I am happy to pray and cover and

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Speaker 2: block every weapon against my sister. She's my baby.

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Speaker 3: Yes, wow, yeah, but.

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Speaker 1: You are blessing me today because sometimes people can assume

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Speaker 1: a lot of stuff and I never thought that. But

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Speaker 1: the reality of it is is to know that you

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Speaker 1: understand your position and you're totally submitted to say God,

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Speaker 1: you're the one that exalts and you and you said,

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Speaker 1: and when it's time, he'll shift when he gives you opportunity.

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Speaker 1: How did you have you always been like that though,

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Speaker 1: this is something you had to evolve to.

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Speaker 2: I was Sarah always had to nudge me when the

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Speaker 2: camera came on for for us to do anything, because

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Speaker 2: I'll be frozen. No, I've always gladly been behind the scenes.

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Speaker 2: Always I'm the middle child. Yeah, I'm happy to be

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Speaker 2: behind the scenes. They call me if they need me,

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Speaker 2: they grit, I'm the secret weapon. My brother, Dexter grabs

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Speaker 2: me if he needs me, my sister grabs me if

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Speaker 2: she needs me. My dad, I'm that's what That's what

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Speaker 2: I am. That's my post. That's how I've always been.

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Speaker 1: But to know at five years old you said God,

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Speaker 1: you said I'm gonna be a preacher. About twelve years old,

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Speaker 1: God calls you to be a preacher, and then you

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Speaker 1: live your life being the intercessor of the family. How

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Speaker 1: did you reconcile that in your mind? I'm not talking

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Speaker 1: about Cora at this age, but saying, God, when is

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Speaker 1: it going to be my time or what did your

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Speaker 1: time look like?

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Speaker 2: That was my time? That was my time and so

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Speaker 2: I don't think that the time is the platform. I

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Speaker 2: think the time is the assignment. And so that that

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Speaker 2: was my time. I was operating in my time. I

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Speaker 2: was operating in my season. And as the time and

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Speaker 2: assignment changes, what that looks like changes, But I was

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Speaker 2: in my time. I'm not waiting for God to do

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Speaker 2: something in me. He is doing something in me already.

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Speaker 7: She said, the time isn't the season.

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Speaker 3: Is the assignment.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, that's good.

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Speaker 1: Why is that good? What did you hear? Because it

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Speaker 1: just messed me up? What are you hearing when she

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Speaker 1: said that?

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Speaker 4: Well, I think sometimes people are waiting for their season, right.

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Speaker 4: They think it has to do with the actual seasons

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Speaker 4: we go through in fall, in spring, in winter. But

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Speaker 4: you're always in your time when you're connected to God,

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Speaker 4: because you're doing what He's called you to do. So

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Speaker 4: when seasons change, you can be steadfast and unmovable in

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Speaker 4: what you're supposed to do because you've always been doing

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Speaker 4: what God called.

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Speaker 6: You to do.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so good. Absolutely, that's so good.

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Speaker 4: I think in your life and just kind of watching

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Speaker 4: the progression of you know, hearing at five at twelve

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Speaker 4: and then you being your dad's what did you call

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Speaker 4: it secret secret weapon? What did that and how did

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Speaker 4: that change for you? Like, because I think even though

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Speaker 4: the assignment is clear, right, as you're growing older and

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Speaker 4: kind of progressing, that can start to look different and

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Speaker 4: take a different shape.

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Speaker 7: So walk us through.

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Speaker 4: Just okay, we know you at five, we know you

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Speaker 4: at twelve, What is this looking like into your adulthood?

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Speaker 7: Being that for your family.

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Speaker 2: Into my adulthood, it would look like I said, yes

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Speaker 2: immediately at twelve, God told me I was going to

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Speaker 2: go through what a lot of young women went through

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Speaker 2: in order to minister effectively. And I said, okay, like

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Speaker 2: no hesitant, all right, I'd like to go back and

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Speaker 2: hit her outside the head because what But as I

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Speaker 2: I grew older, it became everything that I go through

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Speaker 2: has to be for me to minister effectively. And so

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Speaker 2: as a thirteen year old praying for my brother to

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Speaker 2: get through heart attacks, at fourteen years old, my mom

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Speaker 2: calling me from the youth sanctuary to come and pray

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Speaker 2: over everyone in the sanctuary. As I grew being able

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Speaker 2: to prophetically hear God and tell my dad like this

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Speaker 2: is what I'm seeing, I feel like I need to

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Speaker 2: do this. I did my very first conference at sixteen

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Speaker 2: years old, and then another one at seventeen, and then

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Speaker 2: I got scared. Then I got scared, and I was like, okay, yeah,

380
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Speaker 2: maybe not never mind, this is a lot. It's a

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Speaker 2: big expectation that people will have when you jump into

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Speaker 2: your calling without hesitancy. And so I took a beat, like, Okay,

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Speaker 2: this is a lot. Let me take a minute. So

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Speaker 2: I ran for a bit. And at about twenty two,

385
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Speaker 2: I got diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome and they told

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Speaker 2: me that I was going to have trouble having children.

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Speaker 2: And I since I was ten, had wanted to have

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Speaker 2: a child and wanted to be a mother, like that

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Speaker 2: was like my big dream. And I remember my faith

390
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Speaker 2: completely shattering, like maybe there isn't a God, like completely

391
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Speaker 2: completely shattered. And God told me, who said that you

392
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Speaker 2: couldn't help while you were hurting? And I was like, well,

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Speaker 2: I don't want to like bleed all over people, and

394
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Speaker 2: I don't want to share the infertility without like a

395
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Speaker 2: message behind it. And he was like, there's so many

396
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Speaker 2: infertile people though it's about productivity. I'm taking you through

397
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Speaker 2: this so that you can teach people how to bear

398
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Speaker 2: fruit in a barren place. There it is, And so

399
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Speaker 2: as an adult, I became the world secret weapon woo

400
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Speaker 2: to become a warrior and figure out the strategies that

401
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Speaker 2: the enemy uses to try to defeat us. And so

402
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Speaker 2: instead of running from the enemy, I decided to take

403
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Speaker 2: them on. We're going to take on infertility. We'll start there.

404
00:22:47,840 --> 00:22:50,920
Speaker 2: Let's go into a dark place. I don't mind dark places.

405
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Speaker 2: And God birthed me in barrenness. He birthed my ministry,

406
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Speaker 2: faithing it, my very first book, Ferocious Warrior. All of

407
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Speaker 2: that came from a barren place that I refused to resist.

408
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Speaker 2: I walked into it, and I let God show me

409
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Speaker 2: light and what other people saw darkness, and and I

410
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Speaker 2: decided to show the strategy of enemy to people who

411
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Speaker 2: needed it.

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Speaker 1: How did you feel walking into that place of uncovering

413
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Speaker 1: yourself to be able to share. That's a very vulnerable

414
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Speaker 1: place to be in, where you say, here are my

415
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Speaker 1: hidden scars, and I'm gonna reveal it to the world.

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Speaker 3: How did you feel he did it?

417
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Speaker 2: Why can't I? If we're going to walk like Jesus,

418
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Speaker 2: we're gonna share his story, We're going to live his story.

419
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Speaker 2: We're going to take our cross up every single day

420
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Speaker 2: and not show you our bleeding, not show you our scars,

421
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Speaker 2: not show you the weight of this cross is very heavy.

422
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Speaker 2: He's not asking me to do anything that he didn't

423
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Speaker 2: do first. So I felt like, this is reasonable. It's

424
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Speaker 2: my reasonable service.

425
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Speaker 7: Have you found fertility issues are.

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Speaker 2: Heavy?

427
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Speaker 7: Have you found how?

428
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Speaker 4: In what ways have you found that sharing that story

429
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Speaker 4: with women has has helped? Because I know a lot

430
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Speaker 4: of people going through IVF. I know a lot of

431
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Speaker 4: people spending a lot of money. I myself have frozen

432
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Speaker 4: my eggs twice, and I know from FRIBI, especially in

433
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Speaker 4: the Black community, from fribroids and demetriosis pcos. We have challenges.

434
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Speaker 4: How has your testimony impacted women?

435
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Speaker 2: I believe it's given them hope and it's given a

436
00:24:55,840 --> 00:25:00,520
Speaker 2: freedom to not feel shame. And I think that that's

437
00:25:00,560 --> 00:25:06,399
Speaker 2: the biggest thing that my ministry is about taking away

438
00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:11,600
Speaker 2: the shame and the embarrassment off of things that people

439
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:14,960
Speaker 2: and churches and faith would like to put shame on.

440
00:25:16,160 --> 00:25:19,800
Speaker 2: So when I came out, it gave women a voice,

441
00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:24,639
Speaker 2: a secret weapon. It gave them an opportunity to say,

442
00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:27,200
Speaker 2: I don't have to be ashamed about this, I don't

443
00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:30,720
Speaker 2: have to be ashamed about this struggle, but I also adopted,

444
00:25:31,080 --> 00:25:34,880
Speaker 2: so it gave them even more hope that I could

445
00:25:34,920 --> 00:25:38,760
Speaker 2: be a mother in a different way that birthing doesn't

446
00:25:38,800 --> 00:25:44,320
Speaker 2: make you a mother. Producing does, Being consistent does. Nurturing consistently,

447
00:25:44,440 --> 00:25:48,960
Speaker 2: showing up consistently does. And some of us birth books,

448
00:25:49,520 --> 00:25:52,520
Speaker 2: some of us birth baby, some of us birth businesses,

449
00:25:52,920 --> 00:25:56,800
Speaker 2: but we all have wombs that can be birthed. And

450
00:25:57,080 --> 00:26:02,080
Speaker 2: I believe that me sharing my story gave people fertility

451
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:03,120
Speaker 2: and things.

452
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:07,280
Speaker 3: Yes, Corey, you're a preacher through.

453
00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:12,080
Speaker 1: Good Lord, because I just keep hearing every time you

454
00:26:12,160 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 1: talk like that should be a sermon, that should be

455
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 1: a book to do, a book called the Secret Weapons

456
00:26:16,280 --> 00:26:18,880
Speaker 1: be the birth. I'm just sitting there like, good Lord.

457
00:26:19,359 --> 00:26:21,440
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm just called up in what you're saying.

458
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:24,000
Speaker 1: And I'm like, why does everything sound like it's a

459
00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:30,200
Speaker 1: whole sermon by itself? I'm sorry, are you going to

460
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:31,720
Speaker 1: write a book called a secret Weapon?

461
00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:35,800
Speaker 2: I am actually working on a book called Uncomfortable Grace?

462
00:26:36,320 --> 00:26:37,840
Speaker 3: Uncomfortable Grace? What would that be.

463
00:26:37,800 --> 00:26:43,520
Speaker 2: About the favor that God has given me? Throughout my

464
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:51,400
Speaker 2: life has been wonderful but also uncomfortable, And I think

465
00:26:51,480 --> 00:26:55,040
Speaker 2: that a lot of times God asked us to do

466
00:26:55,160 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 2: things in favor that is uncomfortable, and so how do

467
00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:06,400
Speaker 2: you navigate the healing process and the journey that God

468
00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 2: is asking you to go on when it is favor

469
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:11,320
Speaker 2: but it's uncomfortable.

470
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:12,879
Speaker 7: Yeah that's so good.

471
00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:14,399
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so good.

472
00:27:14,560 --> 00:27:17,720
Speaker 1: You posted a video at the erend of this episode.

473
00:27:17,760 --> 00:27:20,120
Speaker 1: It's been probably about two it'd probably be about two

474
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:21,880
Speaker 1: to three weeks.

475
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:25,679
Speaker 3: It was a video. When I saw that literally arrested me.

476
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:29,560
Speaker 1: I was like, what in the world, Cora is being

477
00:27:30,000 --> 00:27:33,160
Speaker 1: the most vulnerable I've ever seen you with this video

478
00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:36,280
Speaker 1: sharing about the struggles and the you know, behind the

479
00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:38,439
Speaker 1: scenes and stuff that happened with your daughter.

480
00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:41,080
Speaker 3: What made you post that video?

481
00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,399
Speaker 2: I was tired of the world having a hold of

482
00:27:45,440 --> 00:27:54,400
Speaker 2: my story and hers, and as a as a protective

483
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:59,920
Speaker 2: and defensive mother, and she's seventeen, about to be eighteen.

484
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,800
Speaker 2: I felt like I set her down. I said, hey,

485
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:08,199
Speaker 2: you know, I've been preaching about our story when I

486
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: go out and minister, I think that we should share it.

487
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:13,880
Speaker 2: What do you think? And she was like, I thought

488
00:28:13,920 --> 00:28:17,560
Speaker 2: you were already sharing it, And I was like, no,

489
00:28:17,640 --> 00:28:20,639
Speaker 2: I hadn't, hadn't really shared it yet, and she was like,

490
00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:24,000
Speaker 2: Mama told you, liked she told me. At thirteen, when

491
00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:27,919
Speaker 2: all of this came crashing down on us, the first

492
00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:29,919
Speaker 2: thing that she told me was that God was going

493
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:33,840
Speaker 2: to get the glory out of this. At thirteen. Come on,

494
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:41,920
Speaker 2: I was apologizing and trying to hold her up, and

495
00:28:42,080 --> 00:28:45,840
Speaker 2: she was holding me up and teaching me what I

496
00:28:45,880 --> 00:28:50,280
Speaker 2: had taught her, that God is going to use your

497
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:54,760
Speaker 2: stories to help someone else. And I just wasn't expecting

498
00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:59,719
Speaker 2: her first immediate response to be God's going to get

499
00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:00,640
Speaker 2: the gloe out of this.

500
00:29:01,280 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 3: Wow.

501
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:05,440
Speaker 2: And so I wanted to share it. I wanted to

502
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:09,360
Speaker 2: share it for the daughter that didn't get chosen. I

503
00:29:09,440 --> 00:29:12,480
Speaker 2: wanted to share it for the mother that did choose.

504
00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:18,400
Speaker 2: I wanted to share it for the shame and the

505
00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:23,920
Speaker 2: embarrassment that surrounds something that our daughters shouldn't be shamed

506
00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:24,920
Speaker 2: and embarrassed about.

507
00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:28,720
Speaker 1: I want to add a trigger warning right before you

508
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:30,760
Speaker 1: say what I'm going to ask you to say, now,

509
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 1: what did you share in that video?

510
00:29:35,400 --> 00:29:41,200
Speaker 2: I shared that my ex husband of ten years sexually

511
00:29:41,240 --> 00:29:45,960
Speaker 2: assaulted my daughter at thirteen years old.

512
00:29:47,200 --> 00:29:49,880
Speaker 1: And I saw some comments where they were like saying,

513
00:29:49,880 --> 00:29:52,720
Speaker 1: of course they don't know the backstory of you having

514
00:29:52,760 --> 00:29:56,040
Speaker 1: a conversation with your daughter four years prior to that,

515
00:29:56,160 --> 00:29:58,440
Speaker 1: and she's saying, God is going to use this story.

516
00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:01,600
Speaker 1: They don't know at seventeen years old, she's saying, aren't

517
00:30:01,640 --> 00:30:02,360
Speaker 1: you already sharing it?

518
00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:03,120
Speaker 3: I'm comfortable.

519
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:07,440
Speaker 1: And sometimes people like to project their own insecurities or

520
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:11,240
Speaker 1: feelings about a situation without even asking you first privately

521
00:30:11,320 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 1: through a DM and say hey, uh, just curious did

522
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:16,800
Speaker 1: you talk to your daughter about that? They'll put it

523
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:19,240
Speaker 1: publicly and say don't you need to be doing X

524
00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:21,960
Speaker 1: y Z, And you like already did that? Of course,

525
00:30:21,960 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 1: why would I uncover my daughter like this and.

526
00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:30,600
Speaker 2: Put it in the caption, but then put it don't

527
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:35,040
Speaker 2: want to read, we do not want to read. It's

528
00:30:35,200 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 2: fundamental out here, though I put it right there in

529
00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:43,720
Speaker 2: the caption. My daughter is fine with us sharing our testimony.

530
00:30:44,200 --> 00:30:44,960
Speaker 3: Isn't that crazy?

531
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:46,960
Speaker 1: You can say it and then they'll come back and

532
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,400
Speaker 1: be like, nah, I don't believe that she said that

533
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:53,000
Speaker 1: and all that. What did she say to you after

534
00:30:53,560 --> 00:30:55,120
Speaker 1: you shared that video?

535
00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:57,320
Speaker 2: She said, Mom, I want to go out there and

536
00:30:57,320 --> 00:30:59,680
Speaker 2: tell them. I want to go out there and tell them,

537
00:30:59,800 --> 00:31:01,720
Speaker 2: she said, but I'm just not ready for all of

538
00:31:01,720 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 2: the comments and everything that they're gonna say. And I said,

539
00:31:05,040 --> 00:31:08,080
Speaker 2: and that's why I'm doing it, Because I'm your mother,

540
00:31:08,240 --> 00:31:11,240
Speaker 2: and I will stand in front of you and share

541
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:14,520
Speaker 2: our testimony. You won't be shamed and you won't be embarrassed.

542
00:31:14,920 --> 00:31:17,760
Speaker 2: The world shared our testimony before we got a chance to.

543
00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:20,560
Speaker 2: This was a public record, and all over all of

544
00:31:20,600 --> 00:31:22,920
Speaker 2: the blogs. Before I even opened up my mouth, I

545
00:31:23,000 --> 00:31:28,160
Speaker 2: was quiet for years. It was wow, lies spread all

546
00:31:28,200 --> 00:31:33,320
Speaker 2: over the place concerning this and surrounding factors, and so

547
00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:36,120
Speaker 2: I was tired. She's about to be eighteen, she's gonna

548
00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:39,480
Speaker 2: be grown. It'll be four years that I've been divorced

549
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:43,959
Speaker 2: March fourth, and I'm doing exactly what my divorce date says,

550
00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:51,360
Speaker 2: Marching fourth. Huh, Marching fourth, indubitably.

551
00:31:53,120 --> 00:31:55,840
Speaker 3: And so, first of all, how is she doing?

552
00:31:56,200 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 2: She is amazing, Amari is She's a gift. Her name

553
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:09,400
Speaker 2: means a gift from God. And she has been the

554
00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:19,000
Speaker 2: most resilient, the most god fearing through this whole process.

555
00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:21,960
Speaker 2: When I was trying to push her off to therapist,

556
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:26,440
Speaker 2: she asked me to take her hand, and I did,

557
00:32:27,080 --> 00:32:31,320
Speaker 2: and I've walked with her and both of my kids

558
00:32:31,320 --> 00:32:40,720
Speaker 2: were affected, and Amari has blossomed. She's blossomed, the trauma

559
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:45,560
Speaker 2: has become a triumphant story for her life. I'm very,

560
00:32:45,680 --> 00:32:48,720
Speaker 2: very grateful for what God has done in her so far.

561
00:32:49,400 --> 00:32:51,160
Speaker 1: Can you do me your favor and look to that camera,

562
00:32:51,240 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 1: and I want you to speak to a mother who

563
00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 1: maybe doesn't even believe their kid when the kid has

564
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,200
Speaker 1: come to them and said this is happening with me,

565
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:05,080
Speaker 1: and they may have sided with the quote unquote abuser.

566
00:33:06,640 --> 00:33:08,840
Speaker 1: I want you to speak to that person, that mother

567
00:33:08,920 --> 00:33:11,720
Speaker 1: or father, or even that family member, grandparent, and I

568
00:33:11,760 --> 00:33:13,360
Speaker 1: want you to have a message for them. And then

569
00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:15,360
Speaker 1: I want you to speak to that person who has

570
00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:20,160
Speaker 1: never shared their story and feel shame wrapped behind that story.

571
00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:23,720
Speaker 1: Speak to them and take a moment to just free

572
00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:24,720
Speaker 1: them and encourage them.

573
00:33:26,080 --> 00:33:31,280
Speaker 2: You don't have to believe them to protect them, you

574
00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:36,120
Speaker 2: don't have to believe that it's true to stand guard anyway.

575
00:33:37,000 --> 00:33:40,840
Speaker 2: For me, whether it was true or not, the idea

576
00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:45,760
Speaker 2: that she would create or could create a story of

577
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:50,280
Speaker 2: this magnitude was concerning enough for me to make a

578
00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:56,440
Speaker 2: decision that was hard. You can do hard things. You

579
00:33:56,480 --> 00:34:01,960
Speaker 2: can push through this. You and your can survive this

580
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:06,960
Speaker 2: and become better if you do the work. You do

581
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:12,360
Speaker 2: not have to believe her to cover her or him.

582
00:34:13,560 --> 00:34:16,880
Speaker 2: You don't have to believe him to cover him and

583
00:34:16,960 --> 00:34:20,520
Speaker 2: to protect him. Just the idea that they would think

584
00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:23,920
Speaker 2: of it is enough for you to stand as a

585
00:34:24,000 --> 00:34:29,600
Speaker 2: parent and protect them from anything that could cause harm.

586
00:34:31,280 --> 00:34:35,919
Speaker 2: You don't have to have shame about your story. This

587
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:41,040
Speaker 2: isn't your fault. There's nothing that you could have done.

588
00:34:41,320 --> 00:34:45,080
Speaker 2: Your brain doesn't work like that, It doesn't see things

589
00:34:45,200 --> 00:34:50,840
Speaker 2: like that. You are okay, You're in a safe space now.

590
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:55,920
Speaker 2: The person that you are now can take on telling

591
00:34:56,000 --> 00:35:00,520
Speaker 2: this story. Maybe not the person you were, but the

592
00:35:00,560 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 2: person you are now has enough strength, has enough victory,

593
00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:11,239
Speaker 2: has enough power and enough evidence to take this on.

594
00:35:12,400 --> 00:35:17,959
Speaker 2: Stand strong, Be for them what you wish someone would

595
00:35:18,000 --> 00:35:21,799
Speaker 2: have been for you. Share your stories so that we

596
00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 2: can overcome. It's not just you. I need to overcome,

597
00:35:28,440 --> 00:35:29,879
Speaker 2: and it happens when you share.

598
00:35:33,040 --> 00:35:38,520
Speaker 1: Heavenly Father, we come to your day thanking you. We

599
00:35:38,680 --> 00:35:43,399
Speaker 1: just thank you for those who have been through the

600
00:35:43,440 --> 00:35:50,680
Speaker 1: atrocity of experiencing sexual assault. Ask that you heal their hearts,

601
00:35:50,920 --> 00:35:56,359
Speaker 1: their minds, the subconscious of their mind, that as they

602
00:35:56,400 --> 00:35:59,920
Speaker 1: begin to just sleep and think. And as these conversations

603
00:36:00,040 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 1: are taking place, or this conversations taking place today, a

604
00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 1: lot of people feel triggered in this moment. But God,

605
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:12,399
Speaker 1: I want this trigger to spark a testimony. I want

606
00:36:12,440 --> 00:36:14,600
Speaker 1: them to be able to listen to this and say, God,

607
00:36:14,680 --> 00:36:16,960
Speaker 1: you see me, and you don't want me going through

608
00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:22,560
Speaker 1: another day, another week, another moment, another year, carrying the

609
00:36:22,640 --> 00:36:27,160
Speaker 1: shame of what happened to me without my permission. And

610
00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:30,319
Speaker 1: so God, I asked that you raise up mighty men

611
00:36:30,360 --> 00:36:35,240
Speaker 1: of valor who have experienced this virtuous women that even

612
00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:40,600
Speaker 1: though that was stolen from them, you still call them virtuous.

613
00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:45,120
Speaker 1: They're still virtuous women. They could never steal their virtue.

614
00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:47,560
Speaker 1: And so God, I asked right now the name of Jesus,

615
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:52,360
Speaker 1: for them to be empowered by your word. God, I

616
00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 1: asked that they take the brave step and enter into

617
00:36:56,280 --> 00:37:00,120
Speaker 1: therapy and counseling so that they can unravel this thing

618
00:37:00,160 --> 00:37:01,120
Speaker 1: that has happened to them.

619
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:04,120
Speaker 3: And God, as you bring them.

620
00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:08,360
Speaker 1: Through on the other side, that they'll be victorious, walking

621
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:12,160
Speaker 1: in power and authority and dominion over this thing. We

622
00:37:12,280 --> 00:37:14,480
Speaker 1: give you all the praise, the glory, and the adoration

623
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:19,040
Speaker 1: because you're a healer. You're a redeemer and they will

624
00:37:19,080 --> 00:37:22,160
Speaker 1: become an overcomer. We thank you in Jesus name. We

625
00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:25,799
Speaker 1: pray amen amen Ah.

626
00:37:26,840 --> 00:37:27,120
Speaker 3: Yeah.

627
00:37:27,160 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 1: That's a that's a tough one. And so when I

628
00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:35,480
Speaker 1: I'll just share this. I got a call from my

629
00:37:35,480 --> 00:37:41,200
Speaker 1: buddy Terrey and he said, listen, Cora called me about

630
00:37:41,239 --> 00:37:45,840
Speaker 1: coming on the Dear Future WIFEI podcast. And in normal circumstances,

631
00:37:45,840 --> 00:37:48,920
Speaker 1: if it was any other platform, I would say don't go.

632
00:37:50,120 --> 00:37:53,680
Speaker 1: But I know you provide a safe space and I

633
00:37:53,760 --> 00:37:56,440
Speaker 1: just want to just congratulate you and provide a safe

634
00:37:56,440 --> 00:38:00,759
Speaker 1: space because my sister is a powerful woman of God,

635
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:05,480
Speaker 1: and I know that God is going to use her

636
00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:09,040
Speaker 1: episode to reach millions and touch people's lives.

637
00:38:09,640 --> 00:38:16,400
Speaker 2: Than y'all, because he's the peace core of our family.

638
00:38:19,120 --> 00:38:24,080
Speaker 1: Mmm, the peace core of my family.

639
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:28,520
Speaker 3: You know, it's a powerful thing to be called.

640
00:38:29,400 --> 00:38:33,560
Speaker 1: It's someone that provides peace, that sets the tone of

641
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:35,160
Speaker 1: peace in the family.

642
00:38:35,600 --> 00:38:37,120
Speaker 3: Why didn't you recognize that.

643
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:41,759
Speaker 2: Very early on? Torre has been the peace core of

644
00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 2: our family from very very early on.

645
00:38:46,320 --> 00:38:47,799
Speaker 3: And so you nickname him kum ba ya.

646
00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:55,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, And whenever they go out of town, we

647
00:38:55,560 --> 00:39:02,440
Speaker 2: sing kumbye, y'all. Yep, as they're walking.

648
00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:06,800
Speaker 3: Hilarious.

649
00:39:07,640 --> 00:39:12,160
Speaker 1: How does it feel though you've at what age did

650
00:39:12,200 --> 00:39:14,440
Speaker 1: you believe that you would get married or did you

651
00:39:14,480 --> 00:39:15,280
Speaker 1: even desire marriage?

652
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:19,160
Speaker 2: Oh? Yeah, But see that's the crazy thing. I desired

653
00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:21,640
Speaker 2: to be a mother more than I wanted to be

654
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:24,719
Speaker 2: a wife. And I think that's why the enemy attacked

655
00:39:24,760 --> 00:39:29,560
Speaker 2: my fertility so so hard, because I did. I really

656
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:34,040
Speaker 2: just love children, like that's just my sweet spot. I

657
00:39:34,120 --> 00:39:37,680
Speaker 2: was a children's pastor. I was a nanny for a decade.

658
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:42,319
Speaker 2: I nannyed several different families, all of them are grown now.

659
00:39:44,239 --> 00:39:46,840
Speaker 2: But I always wanted to be a mom. I wanted

660
00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:49,520
Speaker 2: to be a wife because I wanted to be a mom,

661
00:39:50,360 --> 00:39:53,640
Speaker 2: So you want to be a I knew if in

662
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,279
Speaker 2: order to be a mama, I would have to be

663
00:39:56,320 --> 00:39:59,919
Speaker 2: a wife, And now that I'm a mom, I want

664
00:40:00,080 --> 00:40:04,240
Speaker 2: to be a wife. I was a very good wife

665
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 2: for ten years. I was a very good wife, and

666
00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:10,880
Speaker 2: I loved being a wife.

667
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:13,000
Speaker 3: How do you quantify being a good wife?

668
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:17,240
Speaker 2: I was peace, I was strength, I prayed, I covered,

669
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:21,560
Speaker 2: I provided, I showed up when I didn't want to.

670
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:29,359
Speaker 2: I fought right, I fought wrong. I was present, not

671
00:40:29,640 --> 00:40:34,839
Speaker 2: just there, but I was present and engaged, and and

672
00:40:35,120 --> 00:40:39,320
Speaker 2: you would have never guessed that this was gonna crash

673
00:40:39,360 --> 00:40:45,360
Speaker 2: the way that it did, because we were seemingly very happy,

674
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:51,160
Speaker 2: very very loved, very a joyful, great family.

675
00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:55,879
Speaker 4: Oh tell me a little bit, because you mentioned your

676
00:40:56,120 --> 00:40:58,879
Speaker 4: your kids, and I know for a lot of people

677
00:40:58,920 --> 00:41:01,919
Speaker 4: who may be thinking about adoption, they don't know how

678
00:41:01,960 --> 00:41:05,400
Speaker 4: that process works. Can you tell us a little bit

679
00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:08,120
Speaker 4: about how you ended up adopting your can?

680
00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 2: Absolutely. Both of my babies are adopted through different ways.

681
00:41:12,920 --> 00:41:16,920
Speaker 2: So Amari was adopted through the system, through foster care system.

682
00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:20,280
Speaker 2: So she went into foster care at a year old

683
00:41:20,400 --> 00:41:24,960
Speaker 2: on Christmas Day, and we were the fifth home that

684
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:29,359
Speaker 2: Amari had been in by the time she was three

685
00:41:29,520 --> 00:41:33,920
Speaker 2: going on four, and so she came in, we were

686
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:37,759
Speaker 2: foster parents. We went through the whole class, we got certified,

687
00:41:38,000 --> 00:41:41,280
Speaker 2: went through a home study. I had other foster kids

688
00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:44,320
Speaker 2: that I didn't adopt, but was just taking care of

689
00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:48,440
Speaker 2: them while their parents got it together. And what they

690
00:41:48,520 --> 00:41:52,360
Speaker 2: were saying is there's a lot fewer homes that love

691
00:41:53,320 --> 00:41:56,400
Speaker 2: than there are those that just want to check yes.

692
00:41:56,760 --> 00:42:00,200
Speaker 2: And so we went through the foster care route. At

693
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:03,920
Speaker 2: the time, there was over four hundred thousand children just

694
00:42:04,120 --> 00:42:10,799
Speaker 2: in the state Family Protective Services, and so we took

695
00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:16,479
Speaker 2: her and she blended right in. I mean as soon

696
00:42:16,520 --> 00:42:19,759
Speaker 2: as I picked her up, she was calling me mama.

697
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:23,279
Speaker 2: The first time she called me mama, I literally had

698
00:42:23,320 --> 00:42:27,400
Speaker 2: to hold myself together. We're driving down the street and

699
00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:30,000
Speaker 2: she keeps going, Mama, look at the big ball, Mama,

700
00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:33,720
Speaker 2: look at the big ball. And something hits me, like girls,

701
00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:43,480
Speaker 2: she talking to you, I'm a mom, and it just

702
00:42:43,719 --> 00:42:47,120
Speaker 2: it was a wave. It was a wave. I wasn't

703
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:52,520
Speaker 2: expecting a bond. I wasn't expecting people expect like with adoption,

704
00:42:52,719 --> 00:42:55,080
Speaker 2: it's different, you know, like you're not gonna love the

705
00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:57,400
Speaker 2: kid as much as you would a child that you birthed.

706
00:42:57,440 --> 00:43:00,520
Speaker 2: But I would jump in front of a trained for

707
00:43:00,600 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 2: that girl today, and I don't know that I could

708
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:08,640
Speaker 2: love her more. Had a birth daer myself, and so

709
00:43:08,719 --> 00:43:11,880
Speaker 2: she went. We went that route. She was about to

710
00:43:11,920 --> 00:43:13,880
Speaker 2: be five. She kept saying, Mommy, I want to be

711
00:43:13,920 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 2: adopted before I turned five, And literally two days before

712
00:43:18,480 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 2: her birthday, she was adopted. And Jason was a little

713
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:28,160
Speaker 2: bit of a bumpier route. I had him in our

714
00:43:28,239 --> 00:43:32,960
Speaker 2: home with his biological mother for the first year of

715
00:43:33,040 --> 00:43:39,399
Speaker 2: his life, and then she relinquished her rights and he

716
00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:41,640
Speaker 2: was with us, and then we decided that we were

717
00:43:41,640 --> 00:43:44,320
Speaker 2: going to go through the adoption process at around three

718
00:43:45,160 --> 00:43:48,400
Speaker 2: years old with him. Her and I got into a

719
00:43:48,440 --> 00:43:52,439
Speaker 2: bit of a court battle. We ended up winning, and

720
00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:56,160
Speaker 2: we adopted him very shortly after that as well, before

721
00:43:56,160 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 2: the judge. So both of my children are legally adopted

722
00:44:00,320 --> 00:44:03,839
Speaker 2: and went through the legal route to be adopted, and

723
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:07,719
Speaker 2: both of their adoptions are closed, sealed and cannot be

724
00:44:07,840 --> 00:44:08,760
Speaker 2: reopened again.

725
00:44:09,400 --> 00:44:10,640
Speaker 3: Did you know that that's what I did?

726
00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:12,080
Speaker 2: No?

727
00:44:12,560 --> 00:44:15,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I was a licensed foster parent.

728
00:44:16,080 --> 00:44:18,760
Speaker 1: I adopted my son Armani at the age of sixteen.

729
00:44:19,120 --> 00:44:22,879
Speaker 1: I adopted my nephew, Ladarian. He was around seven when

730
00:44:22,880 --> 00:44:26,520
Speaker 1: I adopted him. So I went through the Texas foster

731
00:44:26,600 --> 00:44:29,319
Speaker 1: care system. I was a foster, licensed foster parent. Did

732
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:30,920
Speaker 1: you start talking about home studies and.

733
00:44:30,880 --> 00:44:31,799
Speaker 3: All that I did?

734
00:44:32,440 --> 00:44:32,600
Speaker 1: That?

735
00:44:33,200 --> 00:44:34,160
Speaker 3: I did all of that.

736
00:44:34,239 --> 00:44:36,880
Speaker 1: And the guy told me when I adopted my nephew Ladarian,

737
00:44:37,280 --> 00:44:40,920
Speaker 1: that he wanted me to adopt someone else, and I said, no,

738
00:44:41,080 --> 00:44:43,719
Speaker 1: I ain't gonna be adopted no other kid like man. No,

739
00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:48,200
Speaker 1: like My daughter had just went off to college and

740
00:44:48,320 --> 00:44:52,920
Speaker 1: my sister was struggling with a drug addiction, and my

741
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:56,399
Speaker 1: nephew was in foster care and he came to spend

742
00:44:56,480 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 1: Christmas with us, and he said, I don't want to

743
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:00,480
Speaker 1: go back there, and I said listen, and have been

744
00:45:00,520 --> 00:45:03,480
Speaker 1: there for about five months, and I said, listen, I'm

745
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:05,480
Speaker 1: gonna have you in thirty days. Not knowing how the

746
00:45:05,520 --> 00:45:09,080
Speaker 1: process works. So then I called up the Falster care system.

747
00:45:09,120 --> 00:45:11,120
Speaker 1: They said, well, you have become a license foster parent.

748
00:45:11,360 --> 00:45:14,560
Speaker 1: You know, first they had me just get them as kinship,

749
00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:15,440
Speaker 1: and then.

750
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:19,000
Speaker 2: They yeah, yeah, you get them as kinship.

751
00:45:19,040 --> 00:45:21,160
Speaker 1: And then they go, hey, listen, if you want to

752
00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:23,680
Speaker 1: get the support that the whole state of Text provide,

753
00:45:23,760 --> 00:45:25,680
Speaker 1: you may want to become a license falster. I ain't

754
00:45:25,680 --> 00:45:27,360
Speaker 1: gonna be doing all that. They said, can you just

755
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:29,480
Speaker 1: take some little wisdom? Can we walk you through that?

756
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:32,359
Speaker 1: I said, I don't need y'all my business, and I sir,

757
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:33,959
Speaker 1: just become a license falseter parent.

758
00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:36,239
Speaker 3: I said, all right. So then I did all that.

759
00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:38,680
Speaker 1: And so because they when you become a license f

760
00:45:38,840 --> 00:45:40,920
Speaker 1: they'd be in your business.

761
00:45:41,360 --> 00:45:45,080
Speaker 2: In your business business, where are your medicine? Where do

762
00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:48,800
Speaker 2: you put your cleaning products? How you how your fridge

763
00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 2: look get out my fridge.

764
00:45:52,400 --> 00:45:53,200
Speaker 3: They walking your house.

765
00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:55,799
Speaker 1: They looking at me, Oh my goodness, I noticed that

766
00:45:55,840 --> 00:45:57,080
Speaker 1: you have some bleach down here.

767
00:45:57,080 --> 00:46:00,960
Speaker 3: Can you put a lock on this tab? Let me

768
00:46:01,000 --> 00:46:04,880
Speaker 3: go do that. You came on a trampoline in your backyard.

769
00:46:05,239 --> 00:46:07,240
Speaker 2: It's bad, It's bad all around.

770
00:46:07,360 --> 00:46:09,520
Speaker 1: I said, good lord, this is too much. But they

771
00:46:09,560 --> 00:46:12,839
Speaker 1: said the exact same thing that they said to you

772
00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:15,839
Speaker 1: about providing a love and home. Most people do it

773
00:46:16,360 --> 00:46:21,120
Speaker 1: to get that little yeah. And they said, you don't

774
00:46:21,120 --> 00:46:24,200
Speaker 1: even care about this because what happened was I'll be transparent.

775
00:46:24,200 --> 00:46:26,359
Speaker 1: They were like, hey, because I was trying to rust

776
00:46:26,360 --> 00:46:28,239
Speaker 1: the adoption. I was like, I don't want them. I

777
00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:31,480
Speaker 1: want my son to have a place of normalcy. So

778
00:46:31,600 --> 00:46:34,760
Speaker 1: I said, hey, can y'all wave the way our money?

779
00:46:34,800 --> 00:46:37,279
Speaker 1: Can y'all wave these our money and our mari? But

780
00:46:37,600 --> 00:46:40,200
Speaker 1: the wave that extended two years that they had to

781
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:44,239
Speaker 1: be in foster care, well, they say, an observation with

782
00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:44,959
Speaker 1: you and their place.

783
00:46:45,600 --> 00:46:46,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, that year.

784
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:49,120
Speaker 1: And then I said, and only had them like four

785
00:46:49,200 --> 00:46:51,040
Speaker 1: or five months at that moment, And I said, can

786
00:46:51,120 --> 00:46:51,879
Speaker 1: y'all wave that?

787
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:54,560
Speaker 3: Because God spoke a word to me? Why didn't tell

788
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:54,880
Speaker 3: him that?

789
00:46:54,920 --> 00:46:57,719
Speaker 1: But God had spoken a word to me that he

790
00:46:57,760 --> 00:47:02,120
Speaker 1: would be in my home on sixteenth birthday, in my home,

791
00:47:02,320 --> 00:47:05,239
Speaker 1: and so when God allowed that to happen, it was

792
00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:07,719
Speaker 1: such a beautiful moment, but it was they was like,

793
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:10,800
Speaker 1: what you gonna do? You realize you're waiving this extended

794
00:47:10,800 --> 00:47:13,319
Speaker 1: amount of checks that you continue to get.

795
00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:14,000
Speaker 3: Care about that. I want this.

796
00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:16,640
Speaker 1: I want him in a healthy environment, because he kept

797
00:47:16,680 --> 00:47:19,719
Speaker 1: feeling like every time he was in placement, he'd do

798
00:47:19,840 --> 00:47:22,279
Speaker 1: something wrong and then the people would be like, he

799
00:47:22,400 --> 00:47:24,919
Speaker 1: get home from school, he done got placed somewhere else.

800
00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:26,480
Speaker 2: She was the same way.

801
00:47:26,719 --> 00:47:28,920
Speaker 3: He was in foster care for five years.

802
00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:32,040
Speaker 1: Wow, for five years, and he was just like and

803
00:47:32,120 --> 00:47:34,880
Speaker 1: I remember when he would do something wrong in my household,

804
00:47:35,400 --> 00:47:39,000
Speaker 1: and he'll be like one time he's sitting in the

805
00:47:39,040 --> 00:47:40,840
Speaker 1: room and he was just like ready to leave, and

806
00:47:40,840 --> 00:47:42,440
Speaker 1: he's like, he said, aren't you getting rid of me?

807
00:47:42,680 --> 00:47:44,880
Speaker 1: I said, no, I ain't getting rid of you. He said, well,

808
00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:46,840
Speaker 1: that's what they did and foster care. Every time I

809
00:47:46,880 --> 00:47:49,680
Speaker 1: did something wrong, they'll place me with somebody else. I said,

810
00:47:49,719 --> 00:47:51,560
Speaker 1: I don't do that with my own biological daughter. Why

811
00:47:51,560 --> 00:47:53,239
Speaker 1: would I do that with you? I said, you know how?

812
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:55,680
Speaker 1: I mean times she did something quote unquote wrong. And

813
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:58,080
Speaker 1: he was just like, so I get to stay here.

814
00:47:58,480 --> 00:47:59,799
Speaker 3: I said, you, my son, you ain't going.

815
00:48:00,719 --> 00:48:03,440
Speaker 1: And I said, I know this sound extreme, but if

816
00:48:03,480 --> 00:48:05,719
Speaker 1: I had to visit you in prison because you did

817
00:48:05,760 --> 00:48:08,799
Speaker 1: something heinous, you steal my son, and I'm gonna father

818
00:48:08,920 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 1: you from prison. So that's just what it is. And

819
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:14,360
Speaker 1: I said, that's how God looks at us. He pursues

820
00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:17,160
Speaker 1: our heart. He says, if the Bible says, I'm married

821
00:48:17,160 --> 00:48:19,520
Speaker 1: to the backslider, So just because you do something wrong God,

822
00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:22,239
Speaker 1: and saying, ain't my child, that's not my kid. I said,

823
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 1: I can never give up on you, because God never

824
00:48:24,239 --> 00:48:24,880
Speaker 1: gave up on me.

825
00:48:25,160 --> 00:48:26,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

826
00:48:26,080 --> 00:48:28,319
Speaker 1: So I love the fact that you said that even

827
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:31,560
Speaker 1: if you had birth those kids, you wouldn't love.

828
00:48:31,480 --> 00:48:32,880
Speaker 3: Them any less.

829
00:48:33,040 --> 00:48:36,400
Speaker 2: I don't anywhere any break. I don't see how I could.

830
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:40,880
Speaker 2: I don't even like I can't compute it. I don't

831
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:44,640
Speaker 2: even know how I could love them anymore. Yeah, And

832
00:48:45,200 --> 00:48:48,839
Speaker 2: in return, like Tuga. That's that's why I call my

833
00:48:48,840 --> 00:48:53,839
Speaker 2: son Tuga. He is glued everywhere everywhere I go. Can

834
00:48:53,880 --> 00:48:54,520
Speaker 2: I go? Can I go?

835
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:55,040
Speaker 11: Can I go?

836
00:48:55,280 --> 00:48:57,880
Speaker 2: Can I go? Can I go? Can I go? They

837
00:48:58,200 --> 00:49:01,960
Speaker 2: both they just am Mari is uh, we call ourselves

838
00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:06,240
Speaker 2: mommy guards. We're not mommy girls, We're not mama girls,

839
00:49:06,719 --> 00:49:11,359
Speaker 2: but we are guards. I protect my mom like a bodyguard.

840
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:14,919
Speaker 2: She need not worry about a thing. If Kochie Bear

841
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:19,799
Speaker 2: is standing and Amara is the same way. If she's

842
00:49:19,840 --> 00:49:22,360
Speaker 2: standing by me and she feels like you're a threat,

843
00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 2: she will rise up and protect her mother. She is

844
00:49:27,680 --> 00:49:30,880
Speaker 2: not about the game. So they they love me the

845
00:49:30,960 --> 00:49:35,560
Speaker 2: same in return. And Amar is just reconnecting with her

846
00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:40,440
Speaker 2: biological family and she is so excited about it. And

847
00:49:40,520 --> 00:49:43,399
Speaker 2: she's just telling me, you know, Mom, you're still my mom,

848
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:47,239
Speaker 2: You're still my family. I'm just trying to figure out

849
00:49:47,239 --> 00:49:48,040
Speaker 2: where I came from.

850
00:49:48,080 --> 00:49:50,360
Speaker 1: And I'm like, girl, hold on, let me ask you

851
00:49:50,400 --> 00:49:51,880
Speaker 1: this because that shows a lot of character.

852
00:49:52,239 --> 00:49:55,040
Speaker 3: You have a closed adoption, but you allowed this to

853
00:49:55,080 --> 00:49:56,760
Speaker 3: take place. Why she asked?

854
00:49:57,600 --> 00:50:00,600
Speaker 2: She asked me she wanted to to know where she

855
00:50:00,719 --> 00:50:04,080
Speaker 2: came from. And I think that it's important for her.

856
00:50:04,840 --> 00:50:08,880
Speaker 2: And there were some protective parameters around there, some boundaries

857
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:12,120
Speaker 2: that we needed her to get old enough to be

858
00:50:12,200 --> 00:50:15,680
Speaker 2: able to take on. And that's what she said. You know,

859
00:50:15,760 --> 00:50:20,160
Speaker 2: I'm seventeen now and I'd like to start looking. And

860
00:50:20,640 --> 00:50:23,600
Speaker 2: I was like, okay, let's do it. And I caught

861
00:50:23,600 --> 00:50:29,040
Speaker 2: Sarah's the if Kombay is the Peace Corps, Sarah is

862
00:50:29,080 --> 00:50:33,640
Speaker 2: the FBI poor of the family. So I caught her

863
00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:36,680
Speaker 2: and I was like, were trying to find your niece's people,

864
00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 2: And I gave her a name and a number, and

865
00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:43,840
Speaker 2: that baby had every information that I needed in less

866
00:50:43,880 --> 00:50:46,959
Speaker 2: than twenty four hours. But she's going to say eight

867
00:50:47,200 --> 00:50:49,560
Speaker 2: less than eight, let me go ahead and give you

868
00:50:49,560 --> 00:50:53,560
Speaker 2: your cred It's less than eight hours. And so she's

869
00:50:53,640 --> 00:50:56,920
Speaker 2: developing that. And I will say I was a little

870
00:50:56,960 --> 00:51:01,000
Speaker 2: bit apprehensive and insecure in the beginning, but she sat down,

871
00:51:01,440 --> 00:51:04,400
Speaker 2: Amari set me down and said, mom, how are you

872
00:51:04,560 --> 00:51:05,759
Speaker 2: feeling about this?

873
00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:09,879
Speaker 3: Raised a will when she can say something like that.

874
00:51:10,040 --> 00:51:12,120
Speaker 2: And I was just like, you know, I'm a little

875
00:51:12,120 --> 00:51:15,319
Speaker 2: overwhelmed about it, but it's going to be fine. And

876
00:51:15,400 --> 00:51:18,880
Speaker 2: she was like, why are you overwhelmed? Like what are

877
00:51:18,920 --> 00:51:19,440
Speaker 2: you like?

878
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:20,200
Speaker 6: What are you like?

879
00:51:21,160 --> 00:51:25,680
Speaker 2: This is how we're a very mental health friendly, emotionally

880
00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 2: maturing home, so we all have to take accountability for

881
00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:34,640
Speaker 2: our emotions in the house, including me. Why do you

882
00:51:34,760 --> 00:51:35,760
Speaker 2: feel this way?

883
00:51:35,800 --> 00:51:36,600
Speaker 3: Mom?

884
00:51:36,760 --> 00:51:42,480
Speaker 2: Okay, I am feeling a little like I'm maybe getting

885
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:48,040
Speaker 2: picked on the back burner maybe, and she was like, no, no,

886
00:51:48,280 --> 00:51:50,319
Speaker 2: I just want to know where I came from. You'll

887
00:51:50,320 --> 00:51:52,839
Speaker 2: always be my mom. I'm not going anywhere. I just

888
00:51:52,880 --> 00:51:54,319
Speaker 2: want to know where I came from. And I want

889
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:56,200
Speaker 2: you to be a part of this with me, Like

890
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:58,799
Speaker 2: I don't want to do this by myself. And so

891
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:01,279
Speaker 2: I was like, okay, we got it. We're going to

892
00:52:01,360 --> 00:52:03,640
Speaker 2: do it. And that's what we did. I gave her

893
00:52:03,680 --> 00:52:06,120
Speaker 2: the number. She's like, what do I text? What do

894
00:52:06,160 --> 00:52:08,600
Speaker 2: I say? Tell her what to say? This is how

895
00:52:08,640 --> 00:52:13,719
Speaker 2: you're saying. And she's like, thank god, Manby. So she's

896
00:52:13,760 --> 00:52:19,080
Speaker 2: really really excited. My hope for both of my children

897
00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:23,920
Speaker 2: is that their biological families will grow a level of

898
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:27,960
Speaker 2: maturity that allows them an opportunity to have a connection

899
00:52:28,080 --> 00:52:32,279
Speaker 2: and a relationship with their children in a way that

900
00:52:32,400 --> 00:52:35,279
Speaker 2: will benefit them. I don't want my kids to be

901
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:43,120
Speaker 2: exposed to manipulation or greed or inconsistency. I want them

902
00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:47,960
Speaker 2: to see love and consistent love and consistent nurture. And

903
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:49,560
Speaker 2: that's my hope for them.

904
00:52:49,800 --> 00:52:50,800
Speaker 7: How old is your son?

905
00:52:51,160 --> 00:52:54,480
Speaker 2: He's eleven. He's eleven. Yeah, he'll be twelve in May

906
00:52:54,520 --> 00:52:56,960
Speaker 2: twenty first, Okay, yep, man.

907
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,879
Speaker 1: That's good that you provide that safe space for her

908
00:53:00,040 --> 00:53:01,440
Speaker 1: to be able to talk to you like that.

909
00:53:01,840 --> 00:53:05,080
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, we got fillings wheel, pillows and everything. It's

910
00:53:05,120 --> 00:53:07,440
Speaker 2: a big deal. It's a big deal.

911
00:53:08,200 --> 00:53:11,319
Speaker 12: But you said feelings and what my mom bought us

912
00:53:11,400 --> 00:53:15,759
Speaker 12: filling will pillows. It's a pillow, but it has the

913
00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:19,840
Speaker 12: fillings all over it in the wheel that fillings will.

914
00:53:20,400 --> 00:53:24,440
Speaker 12: And so whenever my son is overwhelmed, we grab the

915
00:53:24,440 --> 00:53:27,520
Speaker 12: pillow and I make him pick out an emotion and

916
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:29,879
Speaker 12: then you have to tell me like, okay, so what

917
00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:31,240
Speaker 12: do you feel about that emotion?

918
00:53:31,360 --> 00:53:33,640
Speaker 2: Why are you feeling that way? And then we try

919
00:53:33,640 --> 00:53:36,960
Speaker 2: to move to a healthier emotion or a more a

920
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:39,160
Speaker 2: lighter emotion that we can carry.

921
00:53:39,440 --> 00:53:41,920
Speaker 1: That's something you could give me that pillow. How do

922
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:46,080
Speaker 1: you feel the tears?

923
00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:46,520
Speaker 3: Helpful?

924
00:53:48,520 --> 00:53:48,920
Speaker 2: Amazon?

925
00:53:49,400 --> 00:53:49,680
Speaker 1: Thank you?

926
00:53:49,719 --> 00:53:51,800
Speaker 7: I was going to say, let me order it on Amazon.

927
00:53:51,920 --> 00:53:53,760
Speaker 4: And I used to be a teacher, like I started

928
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,680
Speaker 4: my career as an elementary school teacher and got my

929
00:53:56,760 --> 00:54:00,480
Speaker 4: master's in early childhood education. So actually do wing that

930
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:03,440
Speaker 4: and being able to identify that for a level of

931
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:07,520
Speaker 4: emotional intelligence, especially as as children grow, is paramount.

932
00:54:07,520 --> 00:54:08,800
Speaker 7: I know you know that, but yeah.

933
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:13,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's My sister is very gentle parent I'm sure

934
00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:17,480
Speaker 2: y'all picked up on that, and so she she tries

935
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:22,200
Speaker 2: to pour that gentle parenting spirit upon me. I do

936
00:54:22,320 --> 00:54:25,880
Speaker 2: not have it as anchored as she does. It's not

937
00:54:26,000 --> 00:54:29,839
Speaker 2: as I'm working on it being anchored. It is not yet.

938
00:54:29,840 --> 00:54:31,600
Speaker 7: What is your natural parenting style?

939
00:54:33,040 --> 00:54:36,480
Speaker 2: Get somewhere and sit down, Get somewhere.

940
00:54:38,640 --> 00:54:40,959
Speaker 7: How many of us were raised and we turned out great.

941
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:44,360
Speaker 2: It works fine for me, It works fine for me.

942
00:54:45,000 --> 00:54:48,239
Speaker 2: But now they've got to be emotionally mature. And I

943
00:54:48,239 --> 00:54:50,920
Speaker 2: mean not trying to traumatize them. You know, that's the

944
00:54:50,960 --> 00:54:55,959
Speaker 2: whole thing. We were traumatized. We weren't aware.

945
00:54:56,000 --> 00:54:56,479
Speaker 5: We went away.

946
00:54:57,280 --> 00:55:00,560
Speaker 7: No, we're better from it.

947
00:55:00,719 --> 00:55:02,840
Speaker 3: Let me ask you this, because in the world of dating,

948
00:55:02,920 --> 00:55:03,520
Speaker 3: do you date?

949
00:55:05,200 --> 00:55:08,880
Speaker 2: I am not dating right now, but I am open

950
00:55:08,960 --> 00:55:16,959
Speaker 2: to dating. Dating is different. It's different. I'm a very

951
00:55:17,000 --> 00:55:22,120
Speaker 2: traditional girl, and so like I don't I guess I

952
00:55:22,200 --> 00:55:25,200
Speaker 2: like don't have like the list and things like where

953
00:55:25,239 --> 00:55:30,080
Speaker 2: you can't take me and stuff, and like I am

954
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:34,759
Speaker 2: not like Ruth Chris is in a requirement, you know,

955
00:55:34,920 --> 00:55:39,560
Speaker 2: like you don't have to take me to the fanciest places,

956
00:55:39,600 --> 00:55:43,239
Speaker 2: like I like ice cream and pizza and cheeseburgers. Like,

957
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:48,960
Speaker 2: I'm just really simple, but I like a man's man.

958
00:55:49,840 --> 00:55:55,440
Speaker 2: I was raised by a man's man. And there's a lot.

959
00:55:55,239 --> 00:55:59,840
Speaker 3: Of take guitar guitar, real.

960
00:56:02,280 --> 00:56:11,440
Speaker 2: Sassiness. For lack of a better just it's just not

961
00:56:11,520 --> 00:56:15,160
Speaker 2: what I'm used to. Like, I'm used to a man

962
00:56:15,160 --> 00:56:17,960
Speaker 2: that you know is just a man you know like,

963
00:56:19,200 --> 00:56:22,640
Speaker 2: and you can be emotionally mature and a man you

964
00:56:22,719 --> 00:56:25,080
Speaker 2: know like, you don't have to. It's a little bit

965
00:56:25,120 --> 00:56:29,720
Speaker 2: of sassiness. And and I struggle with that because I

966
00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:34,040
Speaker 2: am a girl's girl. I do not I don't like

967
00:56:34,200 --> 00:56:35,040
Speaker 2: sassy guys.

968
00:56:35,600 --> 00:56:38,920
Speaker 4: So, like, what define that? What does that look like?

969
00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:42,160
Speaker 4: What is a man's man? What are some of the tangible.

970
00:56:42,040 --> 00:56:45,920
Speaker 2: Like, you are emotionally mature, you know how to communicate,

971
00:56:45,960 --> 00:56:50,000
Speaker 2: You're not easily offended. You you know how to manage

972
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:52,400
Speaker 2: your money in such a way that you don't have

973
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:54,560
Speaker 2: to worry about whether she wants to go to Ruth's

974
00:56:54,600 --> 00:56:59,280
Speaker 2: christ or McDonald's. You are a prayer warrior. You can pray,

975
00:56:59,400 --> 00:57:02,239
Speaker 2: you can cover, or you can intercede. You have accountability

976
00:57:02,760 --> 00:57:07,799
Speaker 2: to someone other than yourself, because that is dangerous that

977
00:57:07,920 --> 00:57:11,520
Speaker 2: you aren't accountable to anyone, Like you don't have an uncle,

978
00:57:11,760 --> 00:57:17,400
Speaker 2: a mentor a dog, nothing like nobody that can tell

979
00:57:17,440 --> 00:57:22,760
Speaker 2: you you straighten up that Like that's a man's man.

980
00:57:22,840 --> 00:57:26,600
Speaker 2: You're willing to be accountable, You're willing to understand, You're

981
00:57:26,640 --> 00:57:30,000
Speaker 2: willing to communicate, You're willing to to to do the work.

982
00:57:30,080 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 2: You have work ethic, you have morals and respect, and

983
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:39,200
Speaker 2: you respect women of all races and ages and sizes

984
00:57:39,280 --> 00:57:41,880
Speaker 2: and all of the things. You know, it's it's you're

985
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:48,520
Speaker 2: a man. Yeah, all of the opposite of that. Just

986
00:57:48,600 --> 00:57:52,040
Speaker 2: weak with your emotions. Everybody is out to get you.

987
00:57:52,200 --> 00:57:56,400
Speaker 2: Everybody is to blame. You have no accountability everybody. You're

988
00:57:56,440 --> 00:58:01,280
Speaker 2: a victim all the time. Everything is everybody else's fault

989
00:58:01,320 --> 00:58:04,280
Speaker 2: but yours. You don't want to see about your emotions

990
00:58:04,320 --> 00:58:06,440
Speaker 2: because you don't know how to handle your emotions, so

991
00:58:06,480 --> 00:58:10,800
Speaker 2: you're emotionally unavailable. You don't trust God, so you don't

992
00:58:10,840 --> 00:58:13,919
Speaker 2: have a relationship with God. All of the opposite things

993
00:58:13,920 --> 00:58:15,480
Speaker 2: would make you a little bit sassy.

994
00:58:15,920 --> 00:58:17,640
Speaker 3: Have you been on dates since you've been divorced.

995
00:58:18,080 --> 00:58:22,520
Speaker 2: I've been on three dates since my divorce, and all

996
00:58:22,600 --> 00:58:31,200
Speaker 2: of them were epic fills. Yes, every last, because I

997
00:58:31,320 --> 00:58:37,840
Speaker 2: also get fanboys. Okay, bro, okay, so let's talk about that.

998
00:58:38,480 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 2: Let's talk about the ones that want Bishop and not

999
00:58:42,320 --> 00:58:47,800
Speaker 2: his daughter, the pastors that would like to be on

1000
00:58:47,880 --> 00:58:57,680
Speaker 2: the next screenshotted conference flyer. Okay, I call them fanboys.

1001
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:01,520
Speaker 2: I don't have have time for it. So I had

1002
00:59:01,920 --> 00:59:06,680
Speaker 2: a few dates with some fanboys, some some musicians.

1003
00:59:06,720 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 7: How did you think I.

1004
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,840
Speaker 2: Want to be in the band at the Potter's house?

1005
00:59:12,400 --> 00:59:13,960
Speaker 2: Where can I send my resume?

1006
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:14,640
Speaker 1: Oh?

1007
00:59:14,840 --> 00:59:19,560
Speaker 2: No, I had one pastor that had sixteen counts of

1008
00:59:19,600 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 2: assault on his background. Yes, because I have to do

1009
00:59:22,880 --> 00:59:27,040
Speaker 2: background checks, because pastors have sixteen counts of assault on

1010
00:59:27,080 --> 00:59:32,240
Speaker 2: their background. This is what I'm dating, letterious, this is

1011
00:59:32,240 --> 00:59:33,040
Speaker 2: what I'm dating.

1012
00:59:33,800 --> 00:59:39,360
Speaker 3: Coot's brow with you, this is my life. I didn't

1013
00:59:39,360 --> 00:59:41,480
Speaker 3: know I was touching the subject.

1014
00:59:43,120 --> 00:59:45,040
Speaker 7: How did you know they were fanboys?

1015
00:59:45,080 --> 00:59:45,240
Speaker 3: Oh?

1016
00:59:45,320 --> 00:59:50,480
Speaker 2: She knows, Yeah, that she knows. But via discernment, and

1017
00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:52,560
Speaker 2: every time I took what did you dad?

1018
00:59:52,600 --> 00:59:53,120
Speaker 3: You know?

1019
00:59:53,200 --> 01:00:00,080
Speaker 2: Your dad your desert discernment, your dad preach discerming you

1020
01:00:00,720 --> 01:00:03,160
Speaker 2: because I wasn't sitting in service. You didn't see me

1021
01:00:03,560 --> 01:00:06,120
Speaker 2: sitting in service listening to the same sermon that you

1022
01:00:06,240 --> 01:00:08,240
Speaker 2: listen and do we both heard the same sermon.

1023
01:00:08,400 --> 01:00:12,640
Speaker 1: I'm crying right now, Catident, of course, is it a

1024
01:00:12,680 --> 01:00:14,760
Speaker 1: certain like you said, you don't care about all the

1025
01:00:15,240 --> 01:00:17,680
Speaker 1: you know, the wealth of a man?

1026
01:00:18,040 --> 01:00:19,200
Speaker 3: Is that true?

1027
01:00:19,520 --> 01:00:22,880
Speaker 2: I would like him to be responsible with his money.

1028
01:00:22,920 --> 01:00:24,680
Speaker 3: But there's no doubinmout where you say, oh, he has

1029
01:00:24,680 --> 01:00:25,520
Speaker 3: to be a millionaire and a.

1030
01:00:25,680 --> 01:00:28,600
Speaker 2: No, because I'm working to become a millionaire. Yeah, that's

1031
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:33,400
Speaker 2: another big myth. You know. It's a big myth to

1032
01:00:33,520 --> 01:00:37,640
Speaker 2: your Bishop Jake's daughter. You're rolling in the dough. It's

1033
01:00:37,720 --> 01:00:44,000
Speaker 2: not true. No, rolling, not yet, trying to get the

1034
01:00:44,080 --> 01:00:49,400
Speaker 2: dough to roll, all right, So I wouldn't ask him

1035
01:00:49,400 --> 01:00:51,760
Speaker 2: to be a millionaire. I'm trying to get there too.

1036
01:00:52,240 --> 01:00:54,240
Speaker 2: But I would like you to be able to manage

1037
01:00:54,280 --> 01:00:56,840
Speaker 2: your money and not have to eat at McDonald's because

1038
01:00:56,840 --> 01:01:00,040
Speaker 2: you ain't got nothing. And maybe your phone is on

1039
01:01:00,000 --> 01:01:02,600
Speaker 2: one so you can call me and we can catch up,

1040
01:01:02,760 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 2: you know, the simple things. Have you experienced. I have

1041
01:01:13,320 --> 01:01:16,200
Speaker 2: experienced phones being off, Ashley, and you can't connect with

1042
01:01:16,240 --> 01:01:18,880
Speaker 2: me because your phone is on and you're an Android,

1043
01:01:18,920 --> 01:01:26,040
Speaker 2: not an iPhone. And my husband is an iPhone carrier iPhone,

1044
01:01:28,880 --> 01:01:39,240
Speaker 2: an iPhone. I don't care what you say.

1045
01:01:35,400 --> 01:01:43,320
Speaker 3: Yes, so he can't be masculine with an android?

1046
01:01:44,080 --> 01:01:51,160
Speaker 2: No, no, apparently not. I tried it. I tried it.

1047
01:01:51,320 --> 01:01:58,320
Speaker 2: No apparently not. I tried it for myself. It didn't

1048
01:01:58,360 --> 01:01:58,760
Speaker 2: work out.

1049
01:01:59,240 --> 01:02:00,680
Speaker 7: So so in dating?

1050
01:02:01,000 --> 01:02:05,560
Speaker 4: In dating, how then say there's someone watching the podcast

1051
01:02:05,640 --> 01:02:08,600
Speaker 4: right now and they are interested in getting to know you,

1052
01:02:08,640 --> 01:02:09,160
Speaker 4: and they're not.

1053
01:02:09,480 --> 01:02:12,760
Speaker 7: Sassy right how and they're not a fan boy and

1054
01:02:12,760 --> 01:02:13,640
Speaker 7: they're not a fanboy.

1055
01:02:13,760 --> 01:02:17,640
Speaker 4: Okay, how in a perfect world, how would they approach you?

1056
01:02:17,720 --> 01:02:21,040
Speaker 2: They could DM me and you can, Yeah, you can

1057
01:02:21,120 --> 01:02:25,640
Speaker 2: DM me, but don't dm me on some like Bible scripture,

1058
01:02:25,920 --> 01:02:30,160
Speaker 2: God sent you your gift from the Lord prophetically fallen

1059
01:02:30,320 --> 01:02:35,640
Speaker 2: from the sky, and do not love bomb me because

1060
01:02:35,680 --> 01:02:38,840
Speaker 2: the anointing is attractive. So all of you think I'm

1061
01:02:38,880 --> 01:02:47,480
Speaker 2: your wife, but I'm not. So just come in easy, okay, Hey, hey,

1062
01:02:47,600 --> 01:02:52,640
Speaker 2: Cora saw you one dear future, how are you doing?

1063
01:02:53,840 --> 01:02:59,120
Speaker 2: That will work? It's just and I am five nine

1064
01:02:59,720 --> 01:03:02,120
Speaker 2: and not mature enough for anyone shorter.

1065
01:03:02,760 --> 01:03:04,280
Speaker 3: I not mature.

1066
01:03:04,640 --> 01:03:08,600
Speaker 1: I am not Why not core work at you?

1067
01:03:08,920 --> 01:03:10,800
Speaker 2: I am a child And so the minute we get

1068
01:03:10,800 --> 01:03:12,360
Speaker 2: in a fight, I'm gonna tell you to get on

1069
01:03:12,400 --> 01:03:12,800
Speaker 2: the stairs.

1070
01:03:12,800 --> 01:03:13,400
Speaker 3: When you're popping.

1071
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:25,640
Speaker 2: All right, you're not tall enough for that tone, sir. Okay,

1072
01:03:26,200 --> 01:03:32,200
Speaker 2: all right enough, you're not tall enough for that tone.

1073
01:03:32,240 --> 01:03:32,439
Speaker 6: Sir.

1074
01:03:33,560 --> 01:03:38,640
Speaker 2: Absolutely not come down, would you. Oh you're already there.

1075
01:03:38,720 --> 01:03:43,200
Speaker 2: Huh see, so I'm saying so I tell you off

1076
01:03:43,280 --> 01:03:46,240
Speaker 2: the top of the hour, I'm not mature enough for it.

1077
01:03:46,280 --> 01:03:50,560
Speaker 2: And that is why. Okay, so five ten and above,

1078
01:03:52,240 --> 01:03:53,520
Speaker 2: five ten and above.

1079
01:03:53,680 --> 01:03:54,160
Speaker 5: Core.

1080
01:03:55,920 --> 01:03:58,120
Speaker 3: Like that. You got to open up your mind.

1081
01:03:58,400 --> 01:04:03,000
Speaker 2: I did five ten and above. You don't want to

1082
01:04:03,080 --> 01:04:05,880
Speaker 2: date me if you are five nine and lower. Lower,

1083
01:04:06,000 --> 01:04:08,560
Speaker 2: it's not as responsible to Corey.

1084
01:04:08,560 --> 01:04:10,439
Speaker 3: You gotta open up your mind. You can't. You can't

1085
01:04:10,480 --> 01:04:12,200
Speaker 3: base a man on this height like that.

1086
01:04:12,280 --> 01:04:15,520
Speaker 1: This man he's doing everything that you just named and

1087
01:04:15,560 --> 01:04:19,240
Speaker 1: everything you named and that masculine man did not equate

1088
01:04:19,320 --> 01:04:19,680
Speaker 1: to height.

1089
01:04:20,520 --> 01:04:21,640
Speaker 3: And now you're sitting up here.

1090
01:04:21,640 --> 01:04:23,760
Speaker 1: He's all these things, he's gonna cover, You're gonna pray

1091
01:04:23,760 --> 01:04:24,440
Speaker 1: for you and all that.

1092
01:04:24,640 --> 01:04:25,560
Speaker 3: But just because he's not.

1093
01:04:25,840 --> 01:04:28,640
Speaker 2: God looks down on me, and my husband will do

1094
01:04:28,880 --> 01:04:33,360
Speaker 2: the same. Okay. I feel it in my spirit. I

1095
01:04:33,400 --> 01:04:36,360
Speaker 2: believe that God would do that for my life. I've

1096
01:04:36,360 --> 01:04:38,320
Speaker 2: been through too much hell for that for me to

1097
01:04:38,400 --> 01:04:45,120
Speaker 2: have a short husband. Nope, he wouldn't do me like that.

1098
01:04:45,320 --> 01:04:47,320
Speaker 2: He wouldn't do me like that.

1099
01:04:49,040 --> 01:04:51,880
Speaker 1: Of course, a lot of women have testimonies that they

1100
01:04:51,920 --> 01:04:54,560
Speaker 1: had to change, that they had to open up their

1101
01:04:54,600 --> 01:04:56,080
Speaker 1: mind for it's not gonna be your testimony.

1102
01:04:56,560 --> 01:04:59,600
Speaker 2: Nope, they were mature enough to do it. So you

1103
01:04:59,680 --> 01:05:00,720
Speaker 2: just sa he said, I'm not.

1104
01:05:00,920 --> 01:05:02,560
Speaker 3: So you're saying you're real. You're saying I'm just not.

1105
01:05:03,200 --> 01:05:06,960
Speaker 2: I'm not because because we're gonna have conflict, and you

1106
01:05:06,960 --> 01:05:13,800
Speaker 2: don't know how I'm tall conflict. Oh, get out of here, man,

1107
01:05:14,760 --> 01:05:17,040
Speaker 2: get out of here. Are you kidding me?

1108
01:05:17,640 --> 01:05:19,600
Speaker 7: You know, God might have a sense of humor, just

1109
01:05:19,640 --> 01:05:19,920
Speaker 7: like you.

1110
01:05:20,800 --> 01:05:22,160
Speaker 3: Kidding you, somebody short.

1111
01:05:24,080 --> 01:05:29,960
Speaker 2: I don't like it. I don't like it.

1112
01:05:30,120 --> 01:05:35,560
Speaker 3: I doesn't like it. I know you're listening. Prove I

1113
01:05:35,640 --> 01:05:38,320
Speaker 3: rebuke it, both of them.

1114
01:05:38,840 --> 01:05:42,120
Speaker 2: I don't know what's going on over again, okay, And

1115
01:05:42,200 --> 01:05:46,480
Speaker 2: I prayed over this marriage to come, and here they have.

1116
01:05:46,920 --> 01:05:56,720
Speaker 2: There they the audacity mitigated, she said, I rebuked. It

1117
01:05:56,760 --> 01:05:58,120
Speaker 2: won't be my portion, it will not.

1118
01:05:58,520 --> 01:05:59,440
Speaker 3: So let me ask you this.

1119
01:05:59,520 --> 01:06:03,439
Speaker 1: When you look at timing and timelines, is there such

1120
01:06:03,480 --> 01:06:05,240
Speaker 1: a thing as been too soon to marry?

1121
01:06:05,720 --> 01:06:07,480
Speaker 3: Like if you met a guy he was.

1122
01:06:07,440 --> 01:06:09,680
Speaker 1: Five to ten. He was checked. He checked off all

1123
01:06:09,720 --> 01:06:13,880
Speaker 1: the boxes. You feel like it was God's person in

1124
01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:19,200
Speaker 1: your life. You check his accountability, people off that. Yeah,

1125
01:06:19,360 --> 01:06:20,919
Speaker 1: would your father still need to sign off?

1126
01:06:22,680 --> 01:06:27,000
Speaker 2: No, but I would need to say I don't rush right,

1127
01:06:28,960 --> 01:06:31,520
Speaker 2: So even if it's right, it doesn't have to be rushed.

1128
01:06:31,760 --> 01:06:32,800
Speaker 3: What is rush to you? Though?

1129
01:06:34,760 --> 01:06:36,840
Speaker 2: I need to see you in every season, and if

1130
01:06:36,880 --> 01:06:39,440
Speaker 2: I haven't seen you in every season, then that's rushed.

1131
01:06:39,520 --> 01:06:40,280
Speaker 3: So what does that mean?

1132
01:06:40,360 --> 01:06:42,560
Speaker 1: Because that's a line that a lot of guys say,

1133
01:06:42,760 --> 01:06:44,200
Speaker 1: I need to see you in every season?

1134
01:06:44,200 --> 01:06:45,000
Speaker 3: What does why when.

1135
01:06:44,880 --> 01:06:48,080
Speaker 2: You're angry, when you're depressed, when you're distraught, when you

1136
01:06:48,120 --> 01:06:50,600
Speaker 2: are broke, when you are rich, when you are happy,

1137
01:06:50,640 --> 01:06:54,200
Speaker 2: when you are sad, all of the seasons to.

1138
01:06:54,120 --> 01:06:56,160
Speaker 3: Take those on, doesn't that sound like marriage?

1139
01:06:56,800 --> 01:06:58,680
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I need to be able to see you

1140
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:02,800
Speaker 2: in at least five of them before we jump into

1141
01:07:02,840 --> 01:07:07,280
Speaker 2: this storm together, because your seasons and my season's got

1142
01:07:07,320 --> 01:07:09,240
Speaker 2: to be able to go and come together and not

1143
01:07:09,480 --> 01:07:10,760
Speaker 2: come to a tsunami.

1144
01:07:11,200 --> 01:07:13,800
Speaker 1: So you're saying seasons of all those seasons happened in

1145
01:07:13,840 --> 01:07:16,800
Speaker 1: the year, You'll be okay with it, absolutely okay.

1146
01:07:16,840 --> 01:07:18,280
Speaker 3: So it's not a timing thing.

1147
01:07:18,520 --> 01:07:21,320
Speaker 2: No, And I don't think especially from and I grew

1148
01:07:21,400 --> 01:07:23,800
Speaker 2: up with three brothers and my dad was very vocal

1149
01:07:24,320 --> 01:07:28,200
Speaker 2: about how men operating, stuff like he gave us the

1150
01:07:28,240 --> 01:07:32,560
Speaker 2: low down, lowdown on how men just are. And I

1151
01:07:32,840 --> 01:07:35,720
Speaker 2: just really do not subscribe to this idea that a

1152
01:07:35,760 --> 01:07:39,080
Speaker 2: man does not know, at least within the first three months,

1153
01:07:39,120 --> 01:07:40,880
Speaker 2: whether he wants to spend the rest of his life

1154
01:07:40,920 --> 01:07:43,600
Speaker 2: with you or not. Agree it. I just really do

1155
01:07:44,320 --> 01:07:51,880
Speaker 2: they know deals on football games, they know everything that business, deals, books,

1156
01:07:52,000 --> 01:07:55,920
Speaker 2: everything else. But a wife. You got to spend fifty

1157
01:07:56,120 --> 01:07:58,760
Speaker 2: years to figure out if this woman is the woman

1158
01:07:58,840 --> 01:08:01,280
Speaker 2: you want to spend your life. I don't get it.

1159
01:08:01,320 --> 01:08:04,520
Speaker 2: I don't understand it. I don't understand it. So yeah,

1160
01:08:04,600 --> 01:08:07,440
Speaker 2: I think in three months you ought to be able

1161
01:08:07,440 --> 01:08:09,800
Speaker 2: to say, yeah, I think I might be able to

1162
01:08:09,800 --> 01:08:11,720
Speaker 2: do life with you is or maybe not.

1163
01:08:13,960 --> 01:08:19,160
Speaker 1: Are you dating solely with intentionality, meaning you don't want

1164
01:08:19,160 --> 01:08:19,799
Speaker 1: nothing casual?

1165
01:08:20,040 --> 01:08:20,240
Speaker 6: Yeah?

1166
01:08:20,280 --> 01:08:23,240
Speaker 2: No, I don't want anything casual because I have kids.

1167
01:08:23,760 --> 01:08:27,479
Speaker 2: If I didn't have children, then yeah, I probably would.

1168
01:08:27,520 --> 01:08:31,040
Speaker 2: And if I wasn't tongue kissing forty, I probably would

1169
01:08:31,080 --> 01:08:35,639
Speaker 2: have a little bit more time for casualty. But tongue kissing.

1170
01:08:35,680 --> 01:08:38,599
Speaker 2: Forty would like to birth a child because I see

1171
01:08:38,600 --> 01:08:43,200
Speaker 2: why God blocked that last marriage from it happening, and

1172
01:08:43,280 --> 01:08:46,760
Speaker 2: so yeah, kind of, you know, speed up the process here,

1173
01:08:46,840 --> 01:08:47,800
Speaker 2: let's get this thing going.

1174
01:08:48,120 --> 01:08:49,360
Speaker 7: Is it okay? If he has kids?

1175
01:08:49,600 --> 01:08:50,080
Speaker 2: Absolutely?

1176
01:08:50,200 --> 01:08:50,360
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1177
01:08:50,960 --> 01:08:53,280
Speaker 2: Again, I'm not going to ask you to do something

1178
01:08:53,320 --> 01:08:58,120
Speaker 2: I can't do. Is there a now the infants hold tight?

1179
01:08:58,960 --> 01:09:02,280
Speaker 2: The infants looked godless, you go back to that baby man.

1180
01:09:02,360 --> 01:09:05,439
Speaker 2: Let's stop playing with me. Stop playing with me. Okay,

1181
01:09:06,479 --> 01:09:09,360
Speaker 2: your two year old, get out of here, get out

1182
01:09:09,400 --> 01:09:10,479
Speaker 2: of here. Okay.

1183
01:09:10,680 --> 01:09:12,160
Speaker 3: So what's that? What's the age limit?

1184
01:09:12,200 --> 01:09:12,360
Speaker 6: Then?

1185
01:09:13,040 --> 01:09:14,919
Speaker 2: I say four and above?

1186
01:09:15,160 --> 01:09:15,479
Speaker 6: Five?

1187
01:09:16,040 --> 01:09:19,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, kindergarten. Yeah, we're going to school. We're going to.

1188
01:09:19,439 --> 01:09:20,240
Speaker 3: School, all right.

1189
01:09:20,280 --> 01:09:23,439
Speaker 1: So if he got kindergarten above, then he can dem

1190
01:09:23,439 --> 01:09:26,360
Speaker 1: me yes, is there an age limit? What is the

1191
01:09:26,520 --> 01:09:28,960
Speaker 1: age from the youngest to the oldest? What is your

1192
01:09:29,040 --> 01:09:30,040
Speaker 1: dating age range?

1193
01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:31,559
Speaker 2: I don't want to date my son. I don't want

1194
01:09:31,560 --> 01:09:37,879
Speaker 2: to date my daddy, so somewhere you know, thirty five

1195
01:09:38,240 --> 01:09:39,720
Speaker 2: to forty.

1196
01:09:39,200 --> 01:09:43,280
Speaker 3: Five, okay, thirty five to forty five, ten year range? Right?

1197
01:09:43,680 --> 01:09:45,759
Speaker 3: All right? Do you care if they've been married before?

1198
01:09:46,360 --> 01:09:46,439
Speaker 1: No?

1199
01:09:46,680 --> 01:09:48,519
Speaker 3: Because you said you don't whatever want to put something

1200
01:09:48,520 --> 01:09:49,280
Speaker 3: on somebody else that.

1201
01:09:49,240 --> 01:09:53,040
Speaker 2: You're not right depending on how and why you got divorced.

1202
01:09:53,120 --> 01:09:54,240
Speaker 2: So I'd like to know that.

1203
01:09:54,640 --> 01:09:56,920
Speaker 3: And then does it matter how many times they've been married?

1204
01:09:58,000 --> 01:10:02,960
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, three strikes you probably be You should probably

1205
01:10:02,960 --> 01:10:05,600
Speaker 2: sit this one out.

1206
01:10:05,640 --> 01:10:06,280
Speaker 3: Please stop.

1207
01:10:07,280 --> 01:10:11,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you're good at three Oh God, at

1208
01:10:11,800 --> 01:10:14,800
Speaker 2: three year should probably be done. You're not good at it,

1209
01:10:17,320 --> 01:10:19,559
Speaker 2: and that's fine, you know, to come into agreement with that.

1210
01:10:25,120 --> 01:10:26,960
Speaker 2: You're probably not going to put this on the show.

1211
01:10:32,720 --> 01:10:33,639
Speaker 2: Take a quick turn.

1212
01:10:35,720 --> 01:10:38,920
Speaker 3: The comedy started the core comedy.

1213
01:10:39,600 --> 01:10:41,040
Speaker 7: This is part of her calling.

1214
01:10:43,120 --> 01:10:51,639
Speaker 2: Him. Comedy is my first thing. It is your calling, Larry, Oh.

1215
01:10:51,479 --> 01:10:56,120
Speaker 1: My God, And so are you still hopefully optimistic as

1216
01:10:56,120 --> 01:10:58,760
Speaker 1: far as that God has your person out there?

1217
01:10:58,880 --> 01:11:05,080
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I know now, yeah, because I have too

1218
01:11:05,160 --> 01:11:10,680
Speaker 2: much of a desire to fulfill being the incubator to

1219
01:11:10,800 --> 01:11:13,559
Speaker 2: the vision of what God has put in my husband

1220
01:11:13,880 --> 01:11:14,680
Speaker 2: for me not to have.

1221
01:11:14,840 --> 01:11:19,160
Speaker 1: Hold on Good Lord, you said, the incubator to what

1222
01:11:19,360 --> 01:11:21,040
Speaker 1: God have put in my husband.

1223
01:11:21,840 --> 01:11:22,800
Speaker 3: Why do you say that?

1224
01:11:23,320 --> 01:11:26,559
Speaker 2: Because that's what we are as wives. We are the

1225
01:11:26,680 --> 01:11:30,960
Speaker 2: incubators of the vision that God has put in our husbands.

1226
01:11:31,479 --> 01:11:33,759
Speaker 1: And you feel that even though God has a huge

1227
01:11:33,760 --> 01:11:36,400
Speaker 1: calling of your life. You still say you refer to

1228
01:11:36,520 --> 01:11:39,040
Speaker 1: that position as being an incubator for what.

1229
01:11:39,000 --> 01:11:39,920
Speaker 3: God is put in your head.

1230
01:11:40,000 --> 01:11:45,759
Speaker 2: Absolutely that I would birth in him something that God

1231
01:11:46,479 --> 01:11:50,840
Speaker 2: has put in him, that my presence gives him favor

1232
01:11:51,320 --> 01:11:55,720
Speaker 2: from the Lord. I would feel that in me there

1233
01:11:55,800 --> 01:11:58,280
Speaker 2: is favor in me that belongs to my husband.

1234
01:12:00,640 --> 01:12:01,599
Speaker 3: Were you raised like that?

1235
01:12:02,439 --> 01:12:02,599
Speaker 11: Oh?

1236
01:12:02,680 --> 01:12:07,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, my mom is an amazing wife and Sarah's too.

1237
01:12:08,840 --> 01:12:09,000
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1238
01:12:09,040 --> 01:12:11,200
Speaker 1: So you got these powerful women, and this is what

1239
01:12:11,600 --> 01:12:14,840
Speaker 1: I would love for you to share. How do you

1240
01:12:15,080 --> 01:12:19,200
Speaker 1: become such a powerful woman? You watch powerful women all

1241
01:12:19,200 --> 01:12:22,320
Speaker 1: around you, but then still speak in that tone in

1242
01:12:22,360 --> 01:12:26,320
Speaker 1: what you're saying. Their positioning in your husband's life is

1243
01:12:26,360 --> 01:12:30,280
Speaker 1: to birth out of him what God had deposited inside him.

1244
01:12:30,640 --> 01:12:34,760
Speaker 2: That is what our mother raised us in. That's what

1245
01:12:34,880 --> 01:12:39,599
Speaker 2: I watched her do. My dad is not Bishop Jakes

1246
01:12:39,720 --> 01:12:44,280
Speaker 2: without the incubation of what my mother did for the

1247
01:12:44,520 --> 01:12:51,240
Speaker 2: forty plus years of his ministry. He became better because

1248
01:12:51,280 --> 01:12:59,439
Speaker 2: of her. They built us, and so I was raised

1249
01:12:59,439 --> 01:13:01,439
Speaker 2: in that. I was raised in that wisdom. I was

1250
01:13:01,560 --> 01:13:04,720
Speaker 2: raised in my Granny's wisdom. I was raised in my

1251
01:13:04,880 --> 01:13:11,400
Speaker 2: Grandpa Watkins wisdom. They all imparted that in us, what

1252
01:13:11,520 --> 01:13:15,719
Speaker 2: a wife is, what a mother does, what a woman

1253
01:13:16,720 --> 01:13:20,880
Speaker 2: is created to do. We are the womb men to

1254
01:13:21,280 --> 01:13:22,400
Speaker 2: our husband's.

1255
01:13:23,560 --> 01:13:26,479
Speaker 1: Anything you want to ask Ashley. As we begin to close,

1256
01:13:27,240 --> 01:13:29,559
Speaker 1: this girl just blessed me. I laughed about to cry.

1257
01:13:29,560 --> 01:13:30,920
Speaker 1: I felt like I was in church, feel like I

1258
01:13:30,920 --> 01:13:34,560
Speaker 1: went to the Comedy Hour. This was a full episode.

1259
01:13:35,200 --> 01:13:37,640
Speaker 1: And you ain't adding none of this outcourse, because I

1260
01:13:37,640 --> 01:13:39,880
Speaker 1: know y'all gonna ask can I review it so I

1261
01:13:39,880 --> 01:13:41,000
Speaker 1: can decide what's gonna go on.

1262
01:13:41,040 --> 01:13:42,720
Speaker 3: I'm'na let you review it. But I add nothing out

1263
01:13:42,760 --> 01:13:44,200
Speaker 3: of this. This is brilliant.

1264
01:13:45,800 --> 01:13:48,519
Speaker 4: I think when you think about this upcoming year, it's

1265
01:13:48,520 --> 01:13:49,080
Speaker 4: a new year.

1266
01:13:51,040 --> 01:13:52,559
Speaker 7: What is coor focused on.

1267
01:13:54,240 --> 01:14:02,200
Speaker 2: I am focused on making people become chained breakers, giving

1268
01:14:02,320 --> 01:14:05,680
Speaker 2: them the keys and the tools and the resources that

1269
01:14:05,720 --> 01:14:09,120
Speaker 2: they need to render the enemy ineffective in their lives.

1270
01:14:09,960 --> 01:14:14,120
Speaker 2: To give them a hope that secures their faith for

1271
01:14:14,360 --> 01:14:19,759
Speaker 2: every fight that they may be battling. And to connect

1272
01:14:19,800 --> 01:14:23,320
Speaker 2: with them, hopefully in a clarity call, so that we

1273
01:14:23,400 --> 01:14:27,200
Speaker 2: can create strategies and plans to help them stay free

1274
01:14:27,240 --> 01:14:28,240
Speaker 2: for once and for all.

1275
01:14:28,479 --> 01:14:29,400
Speaker 3: How can I connect with you?

1276
01:14:30,200 --> 01:14:35,200
Speaker 2: Corbyjakes dot com or go to webreakchains dot com so

1277
01:14:35,240 --> 01:14:37,479
Speaker 2: that you can begin to break your chains.

1278
01:14:37,920 --> 01:14:39,840
Speaker 3: And so what does this clarity call look like?

1279
01:14:40,360 --> 01:14:44,479
Speaker 2: It is a thirty minute intensive call where we go

1280
01:14:44,640 --> 01:14:47,360
Speaker 2: over the chains that have held you back. We do

1281
01:14:47,439 --> 01:14:50,680
Speaker 2: a chain inventory, I sit down and talk to you

1282
01:14:50,720 --> 01:14:53,880
Speaker 2: about a strategic plan that will help you to break

1283
01:14:53,960 --> 01:14:56,280
Speaker 2: those chains so that you can move forward in the

1284
01:14:56,320 --> 01:14:57,880
Speaker 2: purpose that God has for your life.

1285
01:14:58,000 --> 01:14:58,560
Speaker 3: Oh, I love that.

1286
01:14:58,760 --> 01:15:00,559
Speaker 1: So I even know you did that, and I'm glad

1287
01:15:00,560 --> 01:15:03,240
Speaker 1: we were able to introduce that to this audience.

1288
01:15:03,479 --> 01:15:05,640
Speaker 2: Yes, I'm a chain breaker strategist.

1289
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:08,679
Speaker 3: That's good. And when at that? When was that birth?

1290
01:15:09,400 --> 01:15:14,080
Speaker 2: Probably ferocious warrior. I just didn't know it. I've been

1291
01:15:14,200 --> 01:15:17,479
Speaker 2: helping people break their chains for a long time. We

1292
01:15:17,680 --> 01:15:20,160
Speaker 2: just put a method to it.

1293
01:15:20,200 --> 01:15:22,880
Speaker 1: Isn't that interesting when you said that you didn't want

1294
01:15:22,960 --> 01:15:25,559
Speaker 1: God to have you go through the very thing that

1295
01:15:25,600 --> 01:15:28,200
Speaker 1: you've been called to, And there's no way of getting

1296
01:15:28,200 --> 01:15:29,960
Speaker 1: the annoying to unless you go through it. You can

1297
01:15:30,000 --> 01:15:32,519
Speaker 1: sit there, your daddy could pray and play hands on

1298
01:15:32,560 --> 01:15:34,439
Speaker 1: you. You ain't got no annoyance. You just got somebody prayed

1299
01:15:34,439 --> 01:15:36,280
Speaker 1: that you will get it. And the process of getting

1300
01:15:36,280 --> 01:15:40,040
Speaker 1: it is a pruning process. And to know, as bad

1301
01:15:40,120 --> 01:15:42,760
Speaker 1: as it has been, and we probably haven't scratched the

1302
01:15:42,760 --> 01:15:44,680
Speaker 1: surface of all the things that you witnessed, all the

1303
01:15:44,720 --> 01:15:48,559
Speaker 1: things that you've seen. But the fact that who people

1304
01:15:48,600 --> 01:15:51,599
Speaker 1: are able to witness right now is because you went

1305
01:15:51,680 --> 01:15:52,640
Speaker 1: through the storm.

1306
01:15:52,640 --> 01:15:55,479
Speaker 2: Absolutely and I would go through it again just to

1307
01:15:55,520 --> 01:15:58,120
Speaker 2: be able to help them get through theirs.

1308
01:15:59,160 --> 01:16:01,200
Speaker 3: I would go through the just to help them go

1309
01:16:01,240 --> 01:16:05,439
Speaker 3: through theirs. Really, you believe that absolutely. So what has

1310
01:16:05,479 --> 01:16:05,880
Speaker 3: given you?

1311
01:16:05,920 --> 01:16:07,600
Speaker 1: And I want to wrap this up this is a

1312
01:16:07,680 --> 01:16:11,320
Speaker 1: question what has given you such a heart towards people

1313
01:16:11,360 --> 01:16:13,080
Speaker 1: to that degree?

1314
01:16:15,200 --> 01:16:23,960
Speaker 2: It's probably my dad. I just love the child in

1315
01:16:24,000 --> 01:16:32,240
Speaker 2: the adult. Growing up as a nanny, the children's pastor

1316
01:16:32,560 --> 01:16:34,680
Speaker 2: God has always given me a gift to see the

1317
01:16:34,880 --> 01:16:43,080
Speaker 2: child in a person. And I always saw hurting children

1318
01:16:43,240 --> 01:16:48,160
Speaker 2: and I wanted to be an answer, and God allowed

1319
01:16:48,160 --> 01:16:50,720
Speaker 2: me to be an answer to the hurting child on

1320
01:16:50,760 --> 01:16:55,880
Speaker 2: the inside of a lot of adults. And so I've

1321
01:16:56,000 --> 01:16:59,200
Speaker 2: always just had a passion for reaching that inner child

1322
01:16:59,240 --> 01:17:02,280
Speaker 2: and getting them my changed so that they could be

1323
01:17:02,360 --> 01:17:06,680
Speaker 2: the fullness of who God had them to be because

1324
01:17:06,840 --> 01:17:07,479
Speaker 2: I got to be.

1325
01:17:08,800 --> 01:17:10,919
Speaker 1: You know, let me ask you this before we conclude,

1326
01:17:10,960 --> 01:17:13,759
Speaker 1: how did you feel watching your father go through that healthscare.

1327
01:17:16,640 --> 01:17:19,160
Speaker 1: Could you speak about him so much? And my dad?

1328
01:17:19,160 --> 01:17:21,400
Speaker 1: I got this from your dad and to be to

1329
01:17:21,560 --> 01:17:24,200
Speaker 1: feel like that could have been the possibility of losing him.

1330
01:17:24,320 --> 01:17:29,519
Speaker 3: How did his first child? How did you deal with that? Well?

1331
01:17:29,600 --> 01:17:32,960
Speaker 2: I am a daddy's girl.

1332
01:17:33,880 --> 01:17:34,360
Speaker 3: I can tell.

1333
01:17:36,120 --> 01:17:42,360
Speaker 2: I was at home watching and it was it was

1334
01:17:42,520 --> 01:17:47,599
Speaker 2: funny because I track my dad. I track him and

1335
01:17:48,080 --> 01:17:51,519
Speaker 2: when he was reading his text, I told my best

1336
01:17:51,560 --> 01:17:57,000
Speaker 2: friend something isn't right. And she was like, what do

1337
01:17:57,040 --> 01:17:59,600
Speaker 2: you mean. I said, in thirty eight years, dad is

1338
01:17:59,840 --> 01:18:05,599
Speaker 2: never stuttered wating, that's his favorite part of the sermon.

1339
01:18:06,560 --> 01:18:10,560
Speaker 2: I said, something's not right. And so I'm watching them

1340
01:18:10,960 --> 01:18:12,440
Speaker 2: and he just seems.

1341
01:18:13,560 --> 01:18:13,840
Speaker 3: Off.

1342
01:18:15,800 --> 01:18:19,320
Speaker 2: He just seemed off. And I ran out to the

1343
01:18:19,439 --> 01:18:23,479
Speaker 2: living room to get something, and my best friend said, Cora,

1344
01:18:24,000 --> 01:18:25,920
Speaker 2: get back in here, get back in here. They cut

1345
01:18:25,960 --> 01:18:28,800
Speaker 2: things off. They're cutting things off. And I come back

1346
01:18:28,840 --> 01:18:36,400
Speaker 2: in and I see him praying and then slouching, and

1347
01:18:36,520 --> 01:18:49,000
Speaker 2: I just stood at the TV. I never ever, I

1348
01:18:49,040 --> 01:18:54,000
Speaker 2: don't even know. I don't even know what. I couldn't think.

1349
01:18:54,200 --> 01:18:57,040
Speaker 2: I just I didn't I didn't know. My sister text

1350
01:18:57,120 --> 01:19:00,000
Speaker 2: and was like, what happened? What happened? What just happened,

1351
01:19:00,040 --> 01:19:04,400
Speaker 2: and what just happened? We had no idea For an hour,

1352
01:19:05,760 --> 01:19:08,360
Speaker 2: I didn't even know if he was dead or alive.

1353
01:19:12,080 --> 01:19:21,400
Speaker 2: And it was the scariest moment in my life. I

1354
01:19:21,439 --> 01:19:25,400
Speaker 2: don't think I've prayed harder. I don't think I have

1355
01:19:25,880 --> 01:19:30,400
Speaker 2: fought the devil harder. I I don't. I don't think

1356
01:19:30,600 --> 01:19:35,240
Speaker 2: I every weapon he sharpened in me I used. I

1357
01:19:35,520 --> 01:19:38,080
Speaker 2: used weapons I didn't even know he sharpened in me.

1358
01:19:38,680 --> 01:19:43,240
Speaker 2: To pray. I prayed like I never prayed the whole

1359
01:19:43,240 --> 01:19:45,960
Speaker 2: way to the hospital, secret.

1360
01:19:45,560 --> 01:19:53,960
Speaker 1: Weapon, secret. Yeah, what if you were thank you, Holy Spirit?

1361
01:19:57,360 --> 01:20:02,360
Speaker 1: What if you were fashioned for that moment that everything

1362
01:20:02,439 --> 01:20:07,200
Speaker 1: that you were being fashioned for as a kid, your

1363
01:20:07,280 --> 01:20:10,160
Speaker 1: father spoke that into your life. I'm getting chills even

1364
01:20:10,160 --> 01:20:13,760
Speaker 1: saying this. What if that was for that moment that

1365
01:20:13,840 --> 01:20:18,360
Speaker 1: he needed the prayer of Cora to help pull him through.

1366
01:20:19,560 --> 01:20:23,519
Speaker 2: I wouldn't be surprised. It's what pulled my brother through, really,

1367
01:20:24,200 --> 01:20:27,679
Speaker 2: my brother. The very first time that I knew prayer

1368
01:20:27,960 --> 01:20:32,479
Speaker 2: was something that I was good at. My brother was

1369
01:20:32,560 --> 01:20:37,559
Speaker 2: twenty five. He had had three heart attacks. We were

1370
01:20:37,600 --> 01:20:42,040
Speaker 2: in the hospital and everybody was concerned, and I went

1371
01:20:42,120 --> 01:20:44,360
Speaker 2: up to the nurse and I said, where's your chapel

1372
01:20:46,320 --> 01:20:48,760
Speaker 2: and she said, oh, it's just around the corner. And

1373
01:20:48,800 --> 01:20:51,840
Speaker 2: I said thank you, and I walked to the chapel

1374
01:20:52,040 --> 01:20:55,679
Speaker 2: and I prayed in the chapel and I said, Okay, God,

1375
01:20:55,760 --> 01:21:00,920
Speaker 2: so like I think this may work, but like I

1376
01:21:01,000 --> 01:21:02,479
Speaker 2: really need you not to take.

1377
01:21:02,360 --> 01:21:05,719
Speaker 5: My brother, like.

1378
01:21:04,600 --> 01:21:07,680
Speaker 2: Like we need Jamar and we can't we like we

1379
01:21:07,720 --> 01:21:10,800
Speaker 2: can't function without him. So like you have to let

1380
01:21:10,920 --> 01:21:14,559
Speaker 2: him live. And if you let him live, I will,

1381
01:21:14,760 --> 01:21:17,760
Speaker 2: I'll pray. I'll pray all the time. I will just

1382
01:21:18,000 --> 01:21:20,320
Speaker 2: that's what I'll do. I'll just I will be the

1383
01:21:20,400 --> 01:21:24,280
Speaker 2: prayer for the family. Just please don't let my brother die.

1384
01:21:24,560 --> 01:21:28,200
Speaker 2: And I walked out of the walked out of the chapel,

1385
01:21:28,479 --> 01:21:31,160
Speaker 2: came around the corner and my mom's like crying and crying,

1386
01:21:31,720 --> 01:21:38,559
Speaker 2: and I'm like, well, there goes my prayer life. And

1387
01:21:38,600 --> 01:21:42,000
Speaker 2: she says, Cora, he's fine, he's fine. They don't know

1388
01:21:42,040 --> 01:21:45,200
Speaker 2: what happened, but he's fine. He's fine. He's going to

1389
01:21:45,240 --> 01:21:47,240
Speaker 2: be able to leave the hospital on a couple of days.

1390
01:21:47,240 --> 01:21:50,000
Speaker 2: He's fine. And I looked up and I was like,

1391
01:21:50,479 --> 01:21:53,240
Speaker 2: so this will be our thing, o thing, this will

1392
01:21:53,280 --> 01:21:59,280
Speaker 2: be our thing. And over twenty years later, my father's

1393
01:21:59,400 --> 01:22:03,599
Speaker 2: having a heart attack. God, and I'm having to pray again.

1394
01:22:04,960 --> 01:22:08,560
Speaker 2: Please just don't let my dad die.

1395
01:22:09,080 --> 01:22:11,440
Speaker 3: I didn't even know that. Yeah, their backstory.

1396
01:22:12,560 --> 01:22:17,240
Speaker 2: So it's been it's my post. I'm in my time.

1397
01:22:18,200 --> 01:22:22,400
Speaker 3: This is our thing. Yeah, before we conclude, I have

1398
01:22:22,479 --> 01:22:24,920
Speaker 3: you write a key to love. Can you do us

1399
01:22:24,960 --> 01:22:25,439
Speaker 3: an honor?

1400
01:22:25,479 --> 01:22:27,160
Speaker 1: I know you said you prayed for us even while

1401
01:22:27,200 --> 01:22:31,879
Speaker 1: you're watching the live stream of the wedding, But please,

1402
01:22:33,160 --> 01:22:35,559
Speaker 1: whatever God lays on your heart to just pray for asking.

1403
01:22:35,680 --> 01:22:43,800
Speaker 2: I absolutely Father, God, I thank you for the Whitfields.

1404
01:22:43,880 --> 01:22:46,559
Speaker 2: I thank you for their love. I thank you for

1405
01:22:46,680 --> 01:22:50,000
Speaker 2: their heart, their spirit. I thank you for their purpose,

1406
01:22:50,120 --> 01:22:53,479
Speaker 2: their power, and their platform. I thank you God for

1407
01:22:53,600 --> 01:22:56,680
Speaker 2: everything that they have asked for in quiet. You are

1408
01:22:56,800 --> 01:23:00,519
Speaker 2: showing publicly everything that they have weeped for in the

1409
01:23:00,680 --> 01:23:04,240
Speaker 2: silent times of their times. God, with you, you are

1410
01:23:04,360 --> 01:23:08,080
Speaker 2: answering in the public times now. God, I thank you

1411
01:23:08,160 --> 01:23:11,280
Speaker 2: for every promise that you're giving yes to. I thank

1412
01:23:11,280 --> 01:23:14,080
Speaker 2: you for every door that you're opening, in every single

1413
01:23:14,120 --> 01:23:16,599
Speaker 2: one that you are closing. I thank you for the

1414
01:23:16,680 --> 01:23:21,760
Speaker 2: reframing of what is happening in their identity. I thank

1415
01:23:21,800 --> 01:23:24,320
Speaker 2: you for the reframing of what is happening in the

1416
01:23:25,040 --> 01:23:28,240
Speaker 2: opportunities that they're going to get, the rooms that they're

1417
01:23:28,280 --> 01:23:30,960
Speaker 2: going to be allowed to be entered into. I thank

1418
01:23:31,000 --> 01:23:33,960
Speaker 2: you that the favor that is being activated in their

1419
01:23:34,000 --> 01:23:37,439
Speaker 2: marriage has just begun. I thank you that the seeds

1420
01:23:37,479 --> 01:23:41,280
Speaker 2: are just now being able to blossom. I thank you,

1421
01:23:41,320 --> 01:23:45,440
Speaker 2: Oh God, that every weapon, every agenda, every assignment against

1422
01:23:45,479 --> 01:23:49,120
Speaker 2: them is being canceled and dismantled now in the name

1423
01:23:49,200 --> 01:23:53,200
Speaker 2: of Jesus. I pray God that you uproot every word, curse,

1424
01:23:53,479 --> 01:23:57,640
Speaker 2: that you uproot every agenda, every contract in their bloodline

1425
01:23:57,880 --> 01:24:00,920
Speaker 2: that doesn't come into alignment with what you have ordained

1426
01:24:00,960 --> 01:24:03,719
Speaker 2: for their marriage. I thank you God that the gates

1427
01:24:03,760 --> 01:24:06,680
Speaker 2: of hell will not prevail against them. I thank you

1428
01:24:06,760 --> 01:24:09,680
Speaker 2: that the blood of Jesus will cover them, that everything

1429
01:24:09,760 --> 01:24:12,479
Speaker 2: that they touch will turn to gold. I thank you

1430
01:24:12,560 --> 01:24:15,639
Speaker 2: that everywhere their feet trod will be blessed. That they're

1431
01:24:15,640 --> 01:24:18,120
Speaker 2: blessed in the city, they're blessed in the field. They're

1432
01:24:18,160 --> 01:24:20,760
Speaker 2: blessed when they come, They're blessed when they go. I

1433
01:24:20,840 --> 01:24:23,439
Speaker 2: thank you that they will be the lender and never

1434
01:24:23,640 --> 01:24:25,960
Speaker 2: God the borrower. I thank you God.

1435
01:24:25,920 --> 01:24:29,400
Speaker 10: That everything that they need will be given to them.

1436
01:24:29,640 --> 01:24:32,519
Speaker 2: They will lack for nothing, they will want for nothing.

1437
01:24:32,600 --> 01:24:36,799
Speaker 10: Their children will be blessed, their children's children will be blessed.

1438
01:24:36,880 --> 01:24:40,280
Speaker 10: I thank you for the legacy of leadership, the legacy

1439
01:24:40,320 --> 01:24:44,479
Speaker 10: of power, the legacy of prophetic ability that is going

1440
01:24:44,520 --> 01:24:47,439
Speaker 10: to rain down on your daughter. I thank you God

1441
01:24:47,680 --> 01:24:51,160
Speaker 10: that you're opening up a spiritual inheritance for her that

1442
01:24:51,240 --> 01:24:54,280
Speaker 10: she did not even know she's connected to. I thank

1443
01:24:54,320 --> 01:24:57,479
Speaker 10: you God that you are developing in her a new thing,

1444
01:24:57,640 --> 01:24:59,040
Speaker 10: a new anointing.

1445
01:24:58,640 --> 01:25:00,839
Speaker 2: A fresh fire, fresh spirit.

1446
01:25:01,080 --> 01:25:04,599
Speaker 10: I thank you God that everything that she is asking for,

1447
01:25:04,880 --> 01:25:07,960
Speaker 10: that it will be given to her effortlessly. I thank

1448
01:25:08,000 --> 01:25:11,040
Speaker 10: you God that every blessing that comes to them will

1449
01:25:11,080 --> 01:25:14,760
Speaker 10: be because of what she has prayed and interceded on

1450
01:25:15,200 --> 01:25:17,880
Speaker 10: behalf of them both. I thank you for the gates

1451
01:25:17,920 --> 01:25:20,240
Speaker 10: that are opening. I thank you for the gates that

1452
01:25:20,320 --> 01:25:22,840
Speaker 10: are closing. I thank you for the gifts that are

1453
01:25:23,120 --> 01:25:25,519
Speaker 10: being given to them, and the gifts that are being

1454
01:25:25,600 --> 01:25:28,400
Speaker 10: stirred up and ignited. I give you praise, glory, and

1455
01:25:28,439 --> 01:25:30,720
Speaker 10: honor for all that you're going to do, all that

1456
01:25:30,760 --> 01:25:34,160
Speaker 10: you have already done concerning them both. And we thank

1457
01:25:34,200 --> 01:25:36,880
Speaker 10: you for we believe it is so and so it

1458
01:25:37,120 --> 01:25:38,719
Speaker 10: is in Jesus' name.

1459
01:25:39,240 --> 01:26:11,400
Speaker 2: A man a man, Hallelujahluiah O mhm who.

1460
01:26:12,800 --> 01:26:40,000
Speaker 5: Glory shund.

1461
01:26:42,080 --> 01:26:49,000
Speaker 9: Quodobos, undeailable hole shot, candy oh quotable hos see candid

1462
01:26:49,040 --> 01:26:53,599
Speaker 9: double hol shot, unde double hos see candid double hole shot,

1463
01:26:53,680 --> 01:26:59,439
Speaker 9: candy OH quotable hole see, undeadable lad candy double holes

1464
01:27:01,000 --> 01:27:05,320
Speaker 9: hondidable hole seek, candidable hole shot, cand oh quitable host seek,

1465
01:27:05,400 --> 01:27:08,360
Speaker 9: candidable hole shot cond quitable see.

1466
01:27:09,479 --> 01:27:11,800
Speaker 3: God. I just bless you God. I just bless you.

1467
01:27:13,680 --> 01:27:13,920
Speaker 1: God.

1468
01:27:14,000 --> 01:27:14,880
Speaker 3: I just bless you.

1469
01:27:15,200 --> 01:27:22,040
Speaker 1: I magnify you, glorify your exalt you. You're Jehovah, Jira

1470
01:27:23,640 --> 01:27:27,320
Speaker 1: your hello him yell should die and jehoa rifi.

1471
01:27:29,240 --> 01:27:29,720
Speaker 3: I love you.

1472
01:27:31,720 --> 01:27:39,240
Speaker 1: I bless you, I bless your God. I bless you, Cord,

1473
01:27:39,320 --> 01:27:50,080
Speaker 1: thank you, thanks, thank you. I don't know what you

1474
01:27:50,240 --> 01:27:52,800
Speaker 1: just released. I know you said it in words, but

1475
01:27:52,960 --> 01:27:59,439
Speaker 1: beyond the words was something that was released over my

1476
01:27:59,600 --> 01:28:02,120
Speaker 1: mayors that I do not take lightly.

1477
01:28:39,960 --> 01:28:51,599
Speaker 13: I don't take it lightly. I don't take it lightly.

1478
01:29:06,200 --> 01:29:07,080
Speaker 13: I don't take it lightly.

1479
01:29:09,960 --> 01:29:10,400
Speaker 1: M hm.

1480
01:29:14,400 --> 01:29:20,519
Speaker 5: Hm, m hm.

1481
01:29:24,880 --> 01:29:25,000
Speaker 10: Hm.

1482
01:29:30,000 --> 01:29:34,280
Speaker 3: Thank you. It's flesh and blood. Then reveal that to you.

1483
01:29:38,920 --> 01:29:44,640
Speaker 3: I know for a fact when encounters happened. I know

1484
01:29:44,800 --> 01:29:49,480
Speaker 3: for a fact when there's a shift in the atmosphere.

1485
01:29:49,520 --> 01:29:55,080
Speaker 3: I know for a fact when God glory it shows

1486
01:29:55,160 --> 01:30:16,040
Speaker 3: up in a place sure's up with you. I don't

1487
01:30:16,040 --> 01:30:17,040
Speaker 3: remember what year it was.

1488
01:30:19,360 --> 01:30:21,639
Speaker 1: I was sitting on the front row at the party's house,

1489
01:30:23,880 --> 01:30:26,479
Speaker 1: going through one of my darkest seasons of my life,

1490
01:30:30,520 --> 01:30:34,800
Speaker 1: and God told me, I will never be able to

1491
01:30:35,000 --> 01:30:37,280
Speaker 1: use you on the level I want to use you

1492
01:30:37,400 --> 01:30:42,840
Speaker 1: unless I first deliver you from people's opinion. I wasn't

1493
01:30:42,880 --> 01:30:51,040
Speaker 1: married at the time, I was an adulterous relationship, and

1494
01:30:51,160 --> 01:30:55,040
Speaker 1: I said, God, I don't want people to know what

1495
01:30:55,160 --> 01:31:01,080
Speaker 1: I'm struggling with in my life. I don't remember what

1496
01:31:01,200 --> 01:31:06,639
Speaker 1: Bishop said, but I remember God taking whatever he said

1497
01:31:06,680 --> 01:31:09,000
Speaker 1: in that moment and applying it to my life and said,

1498
01:31:10,320 --> 01:31:11,360
Speaker 1: I will never be able to.

1499
01:31:11,439 --> 01:31:13,439
Speaker 3: Use you love.

1500
01:31:13,520 --> 01:31:15,479
Speaker 1: I want to use you unless I first deliver you

1501
01:31:15,560 --> 01:31:18,479
Speaker 1: from people's opinion. I said, God, You're never going to

1502
01:31:18,600 --> 01:31:20,439
Speaker 1: use me because I care too much about what people

1503
01:31:20,479 --> 01:31:24,479
Speaker 1: say about me. I said, God, my love language is

1504
01:31:24,520 --> 01:31:26,960
Speaker 1: words of affirmation, So how could I ever get to

1505
01:31:27,040 --> 01:31:30,360
Speaker 1: a place that I don't care about what people say?

1506
01:31:35,040 --> 01:31:38,840
Speaker 1: I want this program called Celebrate recovery where I had

1507
01:31:38,920 --> 01:31:45,000
Speaker 1: to share my deepest, darkest secrets and the company of

1508
01:31:45,040 --> 01:31:50,240
Speaker 1: other men, and I said, God, I can say it

1509
01:31:50,320 --> 01:31:53,000
Speaker 1: in this place, but I'll never be able to share

1510
01:31:53,040 --> 01:31:57,880
Speaker 1: stuff publicly. I don't want people looking at me like

1511
01:31:57,960 --> 01:32:03,479
Speaker 1: an adulterer, a cheater. God said, I'll never be able

1512
01:32:03,479 --> 01:32:04,840
Speaker 1: to use you on the level I want to use

1513
01:32:04,880 --> 01:32:08,320
Speaker 1: you unless I first delive you in people's opinion. I said, well,

1514
01:32:08,320 --> 01:32:12,400
Speaker 1: you'll never use me because I care too much about

1515
01:32:12,400 --> 01:32:16,160
Speaker 1: what people say. And God had me birth the Dear

1516
01:32:16,200 --> 01:32:21,560
Speaker 1: Future Wife You podcast in twenty twenty. I sit on

1517
01:32:21,640 --> 01:32:29,240
Speaker 1: this platform share things that I've done that I'm not

1518
01:32:29,360 --> 01:32:34,840
Speaker 1: proud of, and then God began to fashion my heart

1519
01:32:34,920 --> 01:32:40,920
Speaker 1: and my mind not to care about what people say

1520
01:32:41,000 --> 01:32:45,800
Speaker 1: about me, because just like you, I care more about

1521
01:32:45,920 --> 01:32:47,639
Speaker 1: people being healed and set free.

1522
01:32:48,479 --> 01:32:49,680
Speaker 3: How people even view me.

1523
01:32:56,600 --> 01:33:00,120
Speaker 1: That moment started sitting at the part of how That's

1524
01:33:00,160 --> 01:33:03,320
Speaker 1: why I was there with one of my cast for

1525
01:33:03,439 --> 01:33:10,320
Speaker 1: one of my plays. Sitting there, God to lock something

1526
01:33:11,600 --> 01:33:16,360
Speaker 1: in that moment that on this same platform that you

1527
01:33:16,479 --> 01:33:21,639
Speaker 1: sit with a word spoken through your father, then I'm

1528
01:33:21,640 --> 01:33:25,960
Speaker 1: able to sit under this cute moniker of living a

1529
01:33:26,080 --> 01:33:29,200
Speaker 1: lit life, living intentionally and transparently as a moniker of

1530
01:33:29,280 --> 01:33:36,160
Speaker 1: this podcast, but it was birth from that moment, So

1531
01:33:36,360 --> 01:33:36,680
Speaker 1: thank you.

1532
01:33:37,720 --> 01:33:42,760
Speaker 3: The prayer that you prayed over her was straight from

1533
01:33:42,800 --> 01:33:45,880
Speaker 3: the mouth of God. And I know this.

1534
01:33:50,080 --> 01:33:52,960
Speaker 1: So here's a part of the podcast where you are

1535
01:33:53,040 --> 01:33:55,760
Speaker 1: open up this by well, first, I'm ask you to

1536
01:33:55,800 --> 01:33:57,760
Speaker 1: say something before I even tell you to even do that,

1537
01:33:57,880 --> 01:33:58,759
Speaker 1: what's on your heart.

1538
01:34:00,640 --> 01:34:02,360
Speaker 3: Even see in this moment right here.

1539
01:34:07,720 --> 01:34:17,000
Speaker 2: When I watched you all's marriage, your wedding, rather, I

1540
01:34:17,240 --> 01:34:24,720
Speaker 2: felt that it was not for you all, but it

1541
01:34:24,960 --> 01:34:29,280
Speaker 2: was for us to see what love can do after

1542
01:34:29,439 --> 01:34:35,200
Speaker 2: it has been so broken. And so I believe that

1543
01:34:35,479 --> 01:34:40,360
Speaker 2: what God has for your marriage is to continue to

1544
01:34:40,479 --> 01:34:47,639
Speaker 2: do that, to show what love can do after it's

1545
01:34:47,720 --> 01:34:53,960
Speaker 2: been so broken, after it's been caring so much about

1546
01:34:54,600 --> 01:34:58,840
Speaker 2: what people think and what people say. How love can

1547
01:34:59,040 --> 01:35:05,200
Speaker 2: stand a opinion, How love can stand fights, how love

1548
01:35:05,320 --> 01:35:13,200
Speaker 2: can stand nervousness about the call, How love can stand.

1549
01:35:15,760 --> 01:35:18,760
Speaker 2: And I believe that you all are not just the

1550
01:35:18,880 --> 01:35:22,960
Speaker 2: key to what love can do for people, but you're

1551
01:35:23,120 --> 01:35:28,519
Speaker 2: a key for what love can do for you. That

1552
01:35:28,720 --> 01:35:31,799
Speaker 2: you have to always remember that you are each other's

1553
01:35:31,880 --> 01:35:39,479
Speaker 2: gifts and where you are afraid to shine, he will

1554
01:35:39,520 --> 01:35:44,599
Speaker 2: hold the light, and where you get afraid of the light,

1555
01:35:46,040 --> 01:35:52,799
Speaker 2: she will shine. Both of you work together to shine

1556
01:35:52,880 --> 01:35:53,840
Speaker 2: what love can do.

1557
01:35:58,320 --> 01:36:02,679
Speaker 3: Thank you. There's a piece of paper and a pen

1558
01:36:02,760 --> 01:36:05,439
Speaker 3: in that box. I want you to write a key

1559
01:36:05,520 --> 01:36:05,840
Speaker 3: to love.

1560
01:36:07,920 --> 01:36:09,880
Speaker 1: Take a moment and write it, signed your name on it,

1561
01:36:10,000 --> 01:36:14,040
Speaker 1: and then hang it up on that empty hook on

1562
01:36:14,240 --> 01:36:15,920
Speaker 1: that wall there.

1563
01:36:16,680 --> 01:36:19,120
Speaker 3: So I ask you what you think about this episode.

1564
01:36:20,720 --> 01:36:21,600
Speaker 6: I thought it was.

1565
01:36:23,760 --> 01:36:40,479
Speaker 7: Anointed, timely, transparent and special. It was an honor to

1566
01:36:40,600 --> 01:36:44,880
Speaker 7: sit here with Kaura, and it's always an honor to

1567
01:36:45,000 --> 01:36:50,120
Speaker 7: sit here next to you and to push paths.

1568
01:36:51,720 --> 01:36:57,920
Speaker 11: All of the discomfort. And like I told you before,

1569
01:37:00,439 --> 01:37:03,400
Speaker 11: it feels good to finish my second week on the job.

1570
01:37:06,880 --> 01:37:08,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, do an amazing job.

1571
01:37:10,120 --> 01:37:14,360
Speaker 2: I put faith and communication is the key to love.

1572
01:37:15,240 --> 01:37:15,840
Speaker 3: Why do you say that?

1573
01:37:16,920 --> 01:37:22,360
Speaker 2: Because if you have faith, then you believe and trust

1574
01:37:22,960 --> 01:37:25,840
Speaker 2: in the hard times and it helps you to get

1575
01:37:25,960 --> 01:37:30,320
Speaker 2: through them. And if you have communication, then you're able

1576
01:37:30,439 --> 01:37:33,000
Speaker 2: to talk through the tough times to get through them.

1577
01:37:34,040 --> 01:37:40,719
Speaker 3: That's good. Hang it up, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect, perfect Lord,

1578
01:37:42,200 --> 01:37:45,480
Speaker 3: May the love you share today outlived the season.

1579
01:37:45,280 --> 01:37:48,760
Speaker 4: You're in, may carry you through the days when words are.

1580
01:37:48,760 --> 01:37:52,080
Speaker 3: Few and faith has to do the talking. Thank y'all

1581
01:37:52,120 --> 01:37:54,280
Speaker 3: so much, I'll give it up for my homer, poor

1582
01:37:54,400 --> 01:37:54,880
Speaker 3: dress job.

1583
01:37:57,960 --> 01:38:02,200
Speaker 1: Lagarien rust suddenly into child protective services.

1584
01:38:02,240 --> 01:38:06,040
Speaker 3: In twenty fifteen, my nephew black a.

1585
01:38:06,120 --> 01:38:10,320
Speaker 1: Boy, the likelihood have been adopted outside of kinship slim

1586
01:38:10,439 --> 01:38:15,800
Speaker 1: to none Rmione sixteen years old, black a boy with

1587
01:38:16,000 --> 01:38:18,559
Speaker 1: five years in the Falseter care system before I even

1588
01:38:18,600 --> 01:38:19,200
Speaker 1: knew his name.

1589
01:38:20,040 --> 01:38:23,680
Speaker 3: The likelihood have ever been adopted? Yep, you guessed it.

1590
01:38:24,400 --> 01:38:25,320
Speaker 3: Slim to none.

1591
01:38:26,880 --> 01:38:29,840
Speaker 1: While Ladarian and OURMIONI were trying to survive and barely

1592
01:38:29,960 --> 01:38:33,320
Speaker 1: thrive in an overpopulated and underfunded false care system, I

1593
01:38:33,479 --> 01:38:36,760
Speaker 1: was living my own life, doing well professionally, having been

1594
01:38:36,840 --> 01:38:38,960
Speaker 1: a single father with a daughter who at that point

1595
01:38:39,080 --> 01:38:41,439
Speaker 1: was doing well in college. It was my time to

1596
01:38:41,479 --> 01:38:48,080
Speaker 1: live my life right wrong. I felt unsettled, tireless, agitated.

1597
01:38:49,040 --> 01:38:52,320
Speaker 1: There are just two many of our black children stuck

1598
01:38:52,680 --> 01:38:55,960
Speaker 1: in ambiguity and in the limbo of the Falter care system.

1599
01:38:56,680 --> 01:39:00,639
Speaker 1: In twenty seventeen, I legally adopted my nephew Ladarian. Fast

1600
01:39:00,680 --> 01:39:02,960
Speaker 1: forward to twenty nineteen. I had no ties to this

1601
01:39:03,120 --> 01:39:05,560
Speaker 1: other young king, but I felt God instructed me to

1602
01:39:05,640 --> 01:39:09,160
Speaker 1: adopt them. Also in Il Babe starting over with parenting

1603
01:39:09,240 --> 01:39:12,040
Speaker 1: should have been enough. Right, Working with various foster care

1604
01:39:12,080 --> 01:39:15,320
Speaker 1: and adoption agencies to help bring awareness to the countless

1605
01:39:15,479 --> 01:39:18,240
Speaker 1: young Black Kings and the Falster care system should have

1606
01:39:18,400 --> 01:39:19,680
Speaker 1: decreased my agitation.

1607
01:39:19,920 --> 01:39:20,040
Speaker 8: Right.

1608
01:39:20,840 --> 01:39:23,439
Speaker 1: Joining the board of directors of Advantage of Adoption and

1609
01:39:23,600 --> 01:39:27,120
Speaker 1: organization that helps find permanent adoptive homes for children in

1610
01:39:27,160 --> 01:39:29,679
Speaker 1: false care should have led to some type of resolve.

1611
01:39:29,800 --> 01:39:34,160
Speaker 3: Right. No, not at all. None of it felt like

1612
01:39:34,320 --> 01:39:35,320
Speaker 3: I had done enough.

1613
01:39:36,439 --> 01:39:40,519
Speaker 1: I now realized that every one of those experiences was

1614
01:39:40,640 --> 01:39:43,280
Speaker 1: land the fundamental foundation for my life's mission.

1615
01:39:44,240 --> 01:39:48,240
Speaker 3: Kingdom Royal. Kingdom Royal would be a luxury, state of

1616
01:39:48,320 --> 01:39:49,920
Speaker 3: the art home for foster boys.

1617
01:39:50,200 --> 01:39:53,480
Speaker 1: Our first location will be in the Dallas Fort Worth Metroplex.

1618
01:39:53,640 --> 01:39:57,240
Speaker 1: We will utilize the whole person approach that instills identity,

1619
01:39:57,560 --> 01:40:01,439
Speaker 1: empowers them to advocate for themselves, enlightens them regarding new

1620
01:40:01,520 --> 01:40:06,200
Speaker 1: perspectives and limitless options that they thought were impossible.

1621
01:40:07,400 --> 01:40:07,559
Speaker 10: Though.

1622
01:40:07,560 --> 01:40:09,760
Speaker 1: The young Kings will attend the local public schools that

1623
01:40:09,840 --> 01:40:13,040
Speaker 1: are in proximity the King of Royale. Our at home

1624
01:40:13,160 --> 01:40:16,719
Speaker 1: curriculum will broaden their worldview through participating in the arts,

1625
01:40:16,880 --> 01:40:21,680
Speaker 1: attending various cultural events, learning about and engaging in multifaceted

1626
01:40:21,720 --> 01:40:26,400
Speaker 1: discussions about current events and even relevant historical contexts, introducing

1627
01:40:26,479 --> 01:40:29,599
Speaker 1: them to gardening and landscaping, and even caring for our

1628
01:40:29,760 --> 01:40:31,640
Speaker 1: animals on our form and.

1629
01:40:31,760 --> 01:40:32,679
Speaker 3: On site stables.

1630
01:40:33,439 --> 01:40:36,800
Speaker 1: We just launched our startup capital campaign with the goal

1631
01:40:36,880 --> 01:40:38,519
Speaker 1: of raising two point eight million dollars.

1632
01:40:38,560 --> 01:40:39,960
Speaker 3: Now why two point eight million dollars?

1633
01:40:40,840 --> 01:40:43,160
Speaker 1: Well, In twenty seventeen, I created a web series in

1634
01:40:43,200 --> 01:40:46,439
Speaker 1: which I performed random acts of kindness for targeting the

1635
01:40:46,520 --> 01:40:49,519
Speaker 1: homeless community. One of the most notable successes was that

1636
01:40:49,680 --> 01:40:55,000
Speaker 1: one of the videos went viral, garnering twenty eight million views. However,

1637
01:40:55,479 --> 01:40:57,679
Speaker 1: one of my biggest regrets is that I didn't raise

1638
01:40:57,720 --> 01:41:01,080
Speaker 1: a single dollar to help in implementing a more sustainable

1639
01:41:01,120 --> 01:41:05,200
Speaker 1: plan for the homeless community. So, throughout the years, with

1640
01:41:05,439 --> 01:41:08,960
Speaker 1: much remorse, I reflect that I'm not maximizing that moment.

1641
01:41:09,080 --> 01:41:10,160
Speaker 3: I knew if at that.

1642
01:41:10,320 --> 01:41:13,479
Speaker 1: Time just ten percent of the viewers donated one dollar,

1643
01:41:14,040 --> 01:41:17,160
Speaker 1: we would have raised at least two point eight million

1644
01:41:17,240 --> 01:41:20,080
Speaker 1: dollars That could have really established long term support for

1645
01:41:20,160 --> 01:41:23,280
Speaker 1: the homeless community, or at least started a long term

1646
01:41:23,400 --> 01:41:24,360
Speaker 1: initiative to do so.

1647
01:41:25,479 --> 01:41:28,759
Speaker 3: This is my do over, this is our.

1648
01:41:28,840 --> 01:41:32,120
Speaker 1: New beginning together, we can attack this at the route

1649
01:41:32,320 --> 01:41:36,800
Speaker 1: by specifically helping our homeless Black boys, who are already

1650
01:41:36,920 --> 01:41:40,320
Speaker 1: disproportionately represented in the American fossil care system.

1651
01:41:41,040 --> 01:41:42,280
Speaker 3: I'm the Terisar Whickfield.

1652
01:41:42,280 --> 01:41:45,679
Speaker 1: I've been nominated for three regional Emmys documenting my work

1653
01:41:45,720 --> 01:41:48,639
Speaker 1: with the homeless as well as my personal adoption journey.

1654
01:41:49,240 --> 01:41:53,639
Speaker 1: Despite those accolades, the greatest award for me is truly

1655
01:41:53,800 --> 01:41:59,439
Speaker 1: providing the infrastructure for a transformed life. Visit Kingdomroyal dot

1656
01:41:59,520 --> 01:42:01,759
Speaker 1: com from details, crown.

1657
01:42:01,560 --> 01:42:04,519
Speaker 3: A King and make a donation today.

1658
01:42:11,320 --> 01:42:13,679
Speaker 1: I hope you enjoyed this episode of the Dear Future

1659
01:42:13,720 --> 01:42:19,240
Speaker 1: WIFEI podcast. Remember be lit, live intentionally and transparently, and

1660
01:42:19,320 --> 01:42:20,160
Speaker 1: don't stop loving.

1661
01:42:20,600 --> 01:42:23,599
Speaker 3: Make sure to subscribe to our Dear Future WIFEI YouTube channel.

1662
01:42:23,760 --> 01:42:27,280
Speaker 1: We're available on Apple Podcasts, Little Podcasts, Spotify, and Stitcher.

1663
01:42:27,560 --> 01:42:30,360
Speaker 3: You welcome your support. Simply share our podcasts with your

1664
01:42:30,400 --> 01:42:31,080
Speaker 3: friends and family.